#I was angry as a teen but not like this
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My mom called me pretty for the first time this year and it’s been weeks but I just keep thinking about it.
I can’t count how many times she called me fat. Many times in front of others for a laugh. There are countless times that she’s mocked me and shamed me in front of anyone who would listen- when I got my period, when I was hurting myself, when she found out someone had kissed me, when I went on birth control, whenever I gained weight, when my skin was bad, whenever I was afraid of anything, whenever I cried about anything. Any chance she had she took. Family, friends, Facebook, teachers, random people in passing, always multiple neighbors- everyone knew everything and so many of them laughed.
But now I’m pretty.
#I’m so filled with anger lately#I am just so angry with everyone#I was angry as a teen but not like this#I know why I’m angry this time around#I am so sick of people treating me like shit#and me just being kind#and keeping my opinions to myself#and letting it happen#over and over again#I am angry with just about every person in my life right now#I am angry at myself#and it’s not going away#rant#ignore me
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I read some NTT and don’t think comics books are for me but i had fun as i was exploring, I have accumulated bunch of doodles and sketches as i tend to draw them while reading and thought i could stack them together and post it as thanks for these characters. they were very cute 💙❤️🔥
#kory anders#koriand'r#Dc#new teen titans#Titans#dick grayson#If Kory doesn’t have big fluffy hair i have failed my mission#nightwing#dickkory#Watch my style evolve with drawing Grayson his hair give me character growth#She will always be tiny bit taller than him to me#DW about angry kory she is in bf lock. he locked her in bf jail like in monopoly#My art#Much love for Dickkory im still going to be around but i think the franchise exhaust me lol so i wont put expectations on myself
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do they know what personal space is.
also the fact that theo dragged liam in there to confront him? what was his goal here exactly. like just admit that you love him, gay boy.
#making liam angry when theo KNOWS that liams already on edge like???#maybe theo has a punching kink bc what was his plan here#did he want liam to leave with him???#thats even gayer tbh#this homosexual i swear#theo raeken#liam dunbar#thiam#theo raeken x liam dunbar#teen wolf
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teen wolf meme: [1/5] motifs -> fire
You find the girl wearing that necklace, she's your arsonist. Murderer. Excuse me? Arson happens to property. This girl's a murderer.
#teen wolf#derek haale#peter hale#jordan parrish#isaac lahey#scott mccall#twedit#twgifs#mine#my gifs#twmeme#WERE ONTO MOTIFS EVERYBODY LETSGOOO#first up on the roster is fire obviously#the hale fire literally caused every single event in the show without kate burning it down there'd be no angry peter seeking revenge#who'd then turn scott#and of course fire is then carried through the show as a force of destruction#even more benevolent fires in the show like parrish's hellfire is still seen as a destructive element#but also fire is the only thing capable of curing wolfsbane poisoning#as you can see tho i didn't include any wolfsbane being burned out here but it's still very interesting to look at the somewhat dichotomy#created here#because even when fire is used in a healing way it's still something that causes intense pain for the person#which of course links to the whole pain makes you human of the show#also i'm not really happy with the colouring on all these gifs but i HAD to stop abusing the colour tools in davinci i was going insane#and there's definitely a better quote for this but it's the first one that came to mind and i'm tired so that's what we're going with
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actually so sick how they made steph into a martyr for everything wrong with gotham when she lived her whole life trying to prove that she was everything right
#im forever thinking about how her autopsy was leaked on live tv. and how babs used her photos to dissuade misfit from picking up a costume#stephanie brown#robin#batgirl#im so conflicted over how her death and rebirth were handled actually. like on one hand i find it so amazing and cool how she came back and#jumped right back into crime fighting no doubts or fear. on the other hearing that my ravaged and tortured body was paraded around as a#symbol for what was wrong with the world and what not to do about it would make me snap. like the babs-misfit thing makes me unreasonably#angry HAHAH they had no right!!!! no right to use her like that when they wouldnt even accept her in life!!!!!!#people are gonna be like 'oh she didnt actually die and it wasnt /her/ body' that's not the point!!!! it's the idea of it!!!!!#even in death! she's just used to say 'it (she) wasn't enough'!!#it drives me insane. insane!!! war crimes is objectively a HORRIBLE story but the concept of this in particular will never leave my brain#i would kill for her to have responded to babs saying that she showed misfit her autopsy photos with 'oh? did you tell her about the teen#pregnancy too?'#freya talks comics
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Netflix needs to stop promoting ST as a teen show for season 5
#I remember seeing people all angry because s4 leant into the horror more#sir it has always been a horror/sci fi show#the horror is what makes the character-driven element so layered and compelling imo#I guess they advertise based on what garners they widest interest#(anyone remember what s3 promo season was like? sort of like that)#but I want them to go all out with s5#the way they originally wanted the show to go#and for promo to reflect that#this is worded so poorly sorry#but it was always supposed to be directed toward older audiences and they were surprised to see the young audience it garnered too#stranger things#byler#<- target audience#st5 speculation#I’m not saying teens can’t watch and enjoy it#because tons of teens - my younger self included - love horror and can appreciate that element#but it’s not a teen drama show and some people treat it like it is#and act like there’s nothing to analyse or dig deeper into
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your analyses of Lin came to mind the other day when I saw someone post about how “Lin should be able to smack Korra at least once.” And like. It’s not just one post, it seems to be a common ‘jokey’ attitude in the fandom, and…it’s really interesting how much the fandom loves Lin acting violent and aggressive towards everyone - particularly against Korra, who acts in a similar “aggressive” manner but not nearly as shitty (imo), but the fandom seems to despise her for it.
So I was wondering if you have any thoughts specifically on Lin and Korra’s relationship? Both in canon and how the fandom treats them?
Oh yeah, I think I've seen that post! I've honestly been wanting to do more Lin metas but have been holding off because back when I posted a lor of Suyin defences I got a not insignificant amount of nasty anonymous asks, and I know that Lin is beloved by the fandom so while I make my passive aggressive comment from time to time, actually dwelling on the subject is a bit of a gambit.
Honestly, it's not even that I dislike Lin. I actually enjoyed her character a fair amount when I first watched the show and was totally on board with the fandom loving this character. But eventually I got so tired of the constant takes about how everyone in Lin's life is soooo mean to her and how she never did anything wrong and she's secretly just a lil bean , she's just a biy grumpy guys.
And, oh, the jokey comments about how Lin should be allowed to smack Korra, a teen, who, in my opinion gets smacked around fairly enough in the show. Or how she should be allowed to curbstomp Tenzin, despite us knowing very little about their relationship other than the fact that Lin atatcked his house and misused her power as a police officer to terrorise his new partner. Or how Suyin, a woman who has gone through so much to change and become a better person and still keeps ger heart open for those who hurt her, should die or be killed.
Like yeah, they're jokes, but they speak to how the fandom quickly takes Lin's side in most situations, even when there is more nuance to the situation. I think taht due to tlok having such a large amount of violence and fight scenes ans perhaps due to the personality of Korra herself, the fandom has normalised Lin's aggressive and often physical behaviour. And because most of the characters are teens, Lin's immaturity as a person doesn't stick out too much.
But Lin isn't a teen, like Korra or Mako. She's a 50+ year old woman and a fucking cop at that. She should know better. I think one of my favourite questions Lin's character mames me ask is: "how long can you cling to your trauma before its your responsibility to strive to do better?".
This isn't to say that Lin is a horrible person. I'd actually say she's a pretty good person. It's obvious she cares and she can try to be empathetic when the chips are down. But her lack of emotional maturity makes it difficult for her to actually act on her feelings when not in a life or death situation.
Ultimately this is what I like about Lin as a character, her duality. A very protective and thoghtful person, who has stagnated in a shell of anger and aggression.
And I think Lin's relationship with Korra ilustrates this duality perfectly.
I do enjoy Lin and Korra's arguments due to their chemistry and the excellent voice acting. But like it is still an adult yelling at and holding an actual grudge against a 17 year old. Who is already under a huge amount of stress.
I also think that we often forget that in her tiffs with Lin, Korra often starts off with a suprising amount of calmness and grace. She often attempts to actively connect with Lin and express her point through conversation, despite this being sonething Korra markedly struggles with.
Korra : But there were some thugs threatening a helpless shopkeeper, and I had it ... Lin: [Aggressively.] Can it! You should have called the police and stayed out of the way. Korra: [Slightly pleading tone.] But I couldn't jut sit by and do nothing. It's my duty to help people. See, I'm the Avatar.
[...]
Korra: Wait, Beifong? Lin Beifong? [Excitedly.] You're Toph's daughter! Lin: [Seriously.] What of it? Korra: [A hint of amusement suppressed in her tone.] Well then, why are you treating me like a criminal? Avatar Aang and your mother were friends. They saved the world together.
Through the first season, we're lead to infer that Lin's unfounded animosity towards Korra has something to do with her grudge against Tenzin. I can see this not only due to Tenzin's association witg Korra as her teacher and the son of the previous Avatar, but also due to some similarities between Korra ans Tenzin. They're both people saddled with a major responsibility and legacy, who struggle with forming their own identity due to that legacy. Plus, the comic we got about young Tenzin is essentially 1 to 1 Korra's first day in republic city.
Side note: can we stop demonising Tenzin for leaving Lin? I'm pretty sure it's not confirmed that Tenzin left her purely because he needed to have children. And honestly if after he broke up with Lin, she damaged his home, used her posution to terrorise his new partner, and held a grudge for 11+ years, I'm honestly not to sure what to think about their relationship pre breakup. ESPECIALLY with how willy nilly tlok plays with female on male abuse. No, I'm not saying Lin is an abusor, but there may be other factors we need to consider. I mean Lin does outwardly laugh and sympathise with Korra throwing Mako's desk across the room which is the Makorra abuse moment ™️
Though I also adore the implication in B3 that Lin is also reminded of Suyin by Korra. This also is a comparison that makes sense. Korra and Su were both young, rebellious women who had to leave home to find themselves. Both had tendency to be sarcastic and were opinionated and had a habit of defying authority etc.
And I think this may be even more of a reason why Lin has such an aggresive vendetta against Korra and also why she's so controlling in the later seasons. Particularly when she gets on Korra's ass at the party and says that Korra is "nothing special" feels targeted towards Lin feeling like Suyin got special treatment.
Lin being controlling towards Korra can also be seen as her trying to compensate for when she tried to similarly control Su, but Suyin ended up defying her. (While I see a lot of people bring up parentification between Lin and Su, I'll lean more towards it being a very intense rivalry)
Either way, Korra reminds Lin of people who have hurt her and the hurt she seems to cling to in some parody of comfort in familiarity.
This is one of the most visible patterns in Lin I see. Her absolute abhorrence of changing her mindset. She holds a grudge against Tenzin for over 11 years. She holds a grudge against Su and Toph for longer than that. She is so horrifically resistant to even touching the idsa that Suyin had changed as a person. And even after her and Su make up, the moment the opportunity arrises, Lin is back to typecasting Suyin as the bad guy.
People say that Korra was too harsh in The Metal Clan when she called Lin out.
Korra : Su's right. You're never going to change. You're always gonna be a bitter, lonely woman.
And yeah, it was objectively an incredibly mean thing to say and Korra was quite out of line. But she's not wrong. We see Lin struggle with making human connections, we've deduced that her grip on the past makes her hold grudges against people she's never met. We see her be immature, aggressive and emotionally closed off. If she were a healthy individual outside of Zaofu, I would encourage her distancing herself from Suyin. But clearly whatever coping mechanism Lin has is leaving her pushing people away and treating teenagers like her peers.
Like something clearly needs to change.
And I think that's another reason why Korra and Lin are such a fun duo. Because Korra goes through so mucuhchange herself. She shanges the world, she changes the lives of her friends, she changes herself.
And that's something Lin desperately needs and yet fears all the same. This also makes it even more interesting that Aiwei, a member of the Red Lotus who embody that "change" concept was a vital part of Lin and Suyin begining to reconcile.
And I think Lin knows this, to some extent. She knows her coping mechanisms are flawed, but she doesn't want to acknowledge this. But I need to talk about Lin's babystep trail of an arc in a different post.
I was gonna say that Lin and Korra are also similar but honestly other than their tempers and tendency to terrorise their tallass ex boyfriends, there isn't much there.
I still find Lin and Korra's relationship to have some sweet moments. I loved Lin and Korra's moment of kinship afterthey both lost their bending, how gently Korra grabbed Lin after she passed out in Zaofu, how Lin helped Korra get up the stairs after she was paralysed.
I think that one of the reasons they argue so much in B3 partocularly is because they care for each other quite a bit. They just embody two polar opposites. Korra- change and danger. Lin- stagnation and protection. Of course they'll fight.
----
I don't exactly like how fandom treats Korra and Lin's relationship because it always feels ao watered down. This kinda extends to the entire Krew too. The 'Lin is like the Krew's mom' thing. Because on the jokey surface, yeah, i see it. Female authority figure who makes sure they don't get into trouble. Plus fandom has a tendency to forcefully assign cishet traditional family dynamics to found family.
But on a deeper level, acting as if Lin were a mother to the Krew is in my opinion, a bit of an insult to mothers everywhere. Because Lin acts less like an adult and more like a... slightly older teen? Which makes sense, we see that very little has changed in how Lin approaches young people since she was 22. She treats the Krew like peers, bickering with them and making snide comments, but then pulls the authority figure when she wants something. That's like the worst type of adult.
[This is ironic because my mom is actually very much like Lin and this is probably why I gave her so much of a pass when I watched tlok the first time]
Lin is a big sister/aunt figure to most of the Krew at best. Maybe except Mako but he has his own demons and is making himself a son figure whether Lin likes it or not.
But Korra is basically Lin's stand-in for her sister and they both act like it too. They act like me and my sister tbh. And Asami and Bolin barely interact with Lin anyway. There's more ground to posit Su as Bolin's potential mother figure!
Lin is a fascinating character to me, but fandom tropes have sorta ruined her for me. I came into the fandom really liking her character but ended up sorta jaded to seeing the same questionable takes about her over and over again. It just makes me see how little her potential is explored in the show. The writers failed Lin, not by not allowing her to 'win' against Su and Korra and Tenzin and whoever. They failed her by not giving her the storyline she needed. The storyline for which the main catalyst, Korra already was at the centre of the board. They half assed Lin's storyline and now literally every character who so much as looked at Lin has to pay the price.
[Ooh wow symbolism Lin glaring at Zaofu, Suyin's home, but actually glaring at her own reflection.]
I now realise that I have gone on for way too long and got hotrifically off topic, but I hope I have explained at least a few if my thoughts?
#also as for people giving Lin a pass for being “angry” and not Korra#i mean grown paleskinned cop in fake nyc#vs#very clearly brown teen girl#who do you think is more palatable to the western audience#god lin is such an american character it feels like I'm being pecked to death by a 100 bald eagles whenever I think about her yoo much#swinging baseball bat at hornets nest type post#lin beifong#korra#tenzin#suyin beifong#linzin#kinda?#avatar#legend of korra#tlok#the legend of korra#avatar the legend of korra#atlok#beifong brainrot#anti lin beifong#<joke tag
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Do you think Gojo or Nobara would be angry if you decided to distance yourself from them because they can't reciprocate your feelings?
ANONNNN 🥺🥺 tysm for indulging me on this topic….. i’m extremely abnormal about them…….
i think nobara would be kinda pissed. very pissed. she’s just frustrated about the whole ordeal :((( she’s frustrated with you and your feelings and she’s frustrated with herself and her lack of those feelings . most of all, she’s frustrated that you’re pulling away from her like this!! she treasures you so sincerely and she just . doesn’t want to lose you. unlike gojo she’ll do the emotionally mature thing and confront you one way or another — it might not exactly fix things, but she makes sure that the two of you leave no words unsaid. you’re her friend and she loves you. she just wants to see you smile, and it breaks her heart to know that she’s the reason you aren’t.
gojo though… i don’t think he’d be angry. because he gets it. he’s emotionally mature in a much colder way than nobara is — mature in the sense that he’s accepted your feelings, accepted his lack of those feelings, and accepted the fact that things won’t be the same after he rejects you. i think it hurts him a bit (because he really does care for you!!), but only a little bit, because he’s just. so good at isolating himself from his own negative emotions. he’s still friendly with you, still very much wants things to be the same as always — but he understands and accepts that things aren’t that simple. he won’t force you to be a part of his life, but he’s not going to stop smiling whenever your eyes meet either.
#my silly little emotionally guarded angels#they’re very similar but also very different#nobara is most similar to teen gojo than anyone else in the trio imo#gojo is just kinda… cooled off in comparison. he cares and he feels but he does it silently.#i think nobara feels guilty for rejecting you but also angry that you confessed in the first place. and that makes her feel even more guilt#meanwhile gojo is just like ….. oh well! (<- actually cares quite a Lot)#they’re losers. i love them.#thank you for the question anon 🥺 i need to start talking abt nobara more bc i truly adore her… she’s one of my absolute favs…..#and her + gojo w the unrequited love trope is just. chefs kiss#ask tag ✩#nobara x reader#gojo x reader
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"Angry robin" "violent robin" "misbehaving robin" shut up and accept my alternative; spunky Robin. Determined and head strong, can out-stubborn the Batman, has a strong moral-backbone and does what he thinks is right regardless of what anybody else says, Robin. Jason who was sassy and quippy and made crude jokes with a smile on his face. Jason who hid in Bruce's cape and whispered gossip to him. Jason who, if Bruce refused him something, could keep bothering endlessly until Bruce caved. And also dramatic Jason. If Bruce tells him no, it becomes a whole theatrical show; a monologue, a narration, embellishments, and falling onto the floor in his grief upon the fact his cruel father has denied him once again.
(Jason who has suffered through abuse and homelessness and poverty and starvation, who is the Fight out of Fight or Flight, who's built up defenses and walls and when pushed and triggered responds with the thing that's always protected him; anger. He's sweet and kind and funny, and when he sees a pimp hitting a prostitute he gets furious and responds with violence.)
#my dc posting#dc#jason todd#jaybin#im having so many thoughts abt jaybin and he is so important to me#in one fic he went on a hunger strike bc alfred didnt eat w them and did it for so long they had to compromise#i love a jaybin 100% willing to menace and bother batman until the man folds. as is his right#the thing abt jason's backstory is that it shows him unwilling to suffer for a home#ma gunn's is bad; he gets beat up and she tries to get him to help rob a place. so he leaves! and rats the whole thing out to batman#and shows up himself cus he didnt think he had been believed#and lets not forget the fact he hit batman with a tire iron and called him a 'big boob'!#the boy's got moxie!! let jaybin be crass and angry and sassy and flawed and traumatized without reducing him to 2d caricature of a 'troubl#d kid'#i dont like a jason who did nothing but use excessive violence and disobey orders and be cocky and all that shit#i like a jason who was. oh yknow. a complex person!! a child/teen who has been fucking abused!!!#you shouldnt erase the fact that jason's reaction/response to stressful situations and triggers IS anger#it's not an indication that he was always gonna become a criminal/red hood or whatever. get outta here w that shit#but like. let us not go so far in the other direction we forget to have him react and be affected by the abuse he's suffered#anyway. if anyone should be a drama-queen it should be jaybin. once he becomes truly comfortable w bruce he should dial it up to 11#a lot of red hood's appeal (to me&many others) is that he is an 'imperfect' victim. meaning he is angry and flawed and doesnt suffer quietl#but is loud and obvious abt it#so when i see jaybin written as the opposite its like. man whats that about#anyway. jaybin is good and cares and wants to help and protect people. and by god if i ever see anybody writing#him having arguments with bruce about the no kill rule WHILE robin again im gonna throw hands istg-#my tags are like a hidden treasure box. most of what i say is in here lmao
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The common head canon of uncontrollable feral kid!Dick is adorable, but it doesn’t make any sense to me. In canon, kid Dick is usually pretty sweet and eager to please, which is what you’d expect from a kid who at age 8 witnessed his parents’ violent deaths, was shoved into juvie for a few months, and then was taken in by a wealthy but angry and emotionally unavailable man.
Yes, he wanted to find his parents’ killer and get justice for them, but once that is done and he realizes he’ll be staying with Bruce and acting as Robin, he is sweet, helpful, obedient and basically as lovable as possible to keep Bruce liking him.
And Dick wasn’t wrong to do that — as soon as he hits his teens and acts out just a little (because his teen rebellion phase is pretty darn mild), Bruce flips his shit, fires him from Robin and starts screaming at him all the time.
Like, I love fics about wild kid Dick, and I love fics where Dick is an angry traumatized kid and Bruce is a patient loving dad. But unfortunately that’s not really how it played out. I don’t think Bruce in canon is a horrible dad, but he’s definitely emotionally immature and has trouble parenting a kid who isn’t actively trying to please him (see also: Jason before his death, Timothy, and even Damian in his own way).
#just people pleaser things#the transition from cute kid dick to angry teen dick is so sad to me#because bruce can’t handle any pushback at all#I like to think adult dick has a healthier relationship with Bruce#but it’s probably not true#dick grayson#nightwing#batfamily#batman#bruce wayne#canon vs fanon
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teen wolf meme: [3/6] creatures -> kitsune
There are thirteen kinds of Kitsune: celestial, wild, ocean, thunder... But there is one, a dark Kitsune. They call it void, or Nogitsune.
#teen wolf#kitsune#kira yukimura#nogitsune#noshiko yukimura#twedit#twgifs#mine#my gifs#twmeme#kitsune my beloveds#we should have gotten more of noshiko#actually they should have just treated all the yukimuras better#kira's tail should have had more impact on the story#i know noshiko only had like 13 tails or smth after being alive for 900 years so it wouldn't make sense for kira to get another one#during the run of the show BUT what they did do with her tail like her father using it to bring her back in season 5 had so much potential#they should have done more with it is all i want honestly#i'm gonna sound like a broken record for all these creature ones but the kitsune are soooo cool within the show#would have been great if they didn't use japanese imagery like that tho#not even gonna touch on how the movie messed up so much of the mythology and changed stuff i'll get angry#just know i love them
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Drew these before remembering that the camp would have been closed in 2020 because of covid whoops
#camp camp#cc preston#cc ered#cc nerris#cc harrison#cc sk#cc space kid#cc nikki#cc neil#cc nurf#cc max#cc dolph#cc rudolph#i'm not very satisfied with how i designed teen harrisin though#i have a good grasp of what i think he would look like as an adult but not as a teen#i don't think he would still be into illusionism as a teen#he'd probably call it cringe or something#and i feel like my design for nerris is a bit far from their original design maybe?#they would be into archery but idk about the outfit#i love the idea of this edgy angry teen being in knitting camp of all things#ered coming back as a camp counselor so that she can still hang out with the others#and david being super proud of her even though she doesn't take her job seriously at all#i think nikki would hit puberty early and get shapes like her mother early on#and would aaabsolutely HATE it#she'd wear big shirts and sports bras constantly#my art
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wip (not) wednesday
in honour of hitting 100k words (WHAT THE FUCK) of this fic I am gonna drop a wee little snippet I suppoossseeeeeeAAAAAAAAAGAGHG
This is from the beginning (ish) of the 6th and final chapter of Third Time's The Charm season 1: 'Promises, Fools'. i only have a handful of scenes left in this chapter and then I'm DONE!!! (she says as if it's not already like 20k words long (FREE MEEEE))
“I need you,” were the first words he whispered into the soft rustling of sheets as Derek began to stir behind him. A real answer to the question he’d asked earlier. Derek probably didn’t hear. Or maybe he was too close to asleep to answer properly. Or to understand. Or maybe he just didn’t want to. He could almost hear the bullshit answer Derek would give him back if he gave one at all. ‘I’m right here,’ he’d say. ‘You already have me.’ “I don’t wanna be Him,” were the next words he said, an eternity of silence later. Derek’s hand stopped where it had been tracing back and forth right beside the concave scar tissue left over from that night at the mall. It was the only one of his scars that made him nauseous to touch. It had hurt, when the grimoire was out of his skin. It ached and burned if he strained too much. It itched. But then he’d touch it and that phantom sensation of touching his own internal organs made his stomach lurch. That and couldn’t sleep on his front or back anymore. “Who?” “Him,” Stiles answered, “Me. The Other Me.” After a moment, Derek answered into his skin, “I know.” Stiles took in a shaky breath, “I don’t want to. I don’t… I…” His brows met in the middle. Derek’s fingertips started to move again, more conscious in their comfort. “I don’t understand you.” He could feel the way Derek’s brows moved, just as his did, against the back of his neck, “What do you mean?” “I burned your house down,” Stiles answered mildly. Derek’s breath caught against him, “You didn’t–” “I did,” Stiles said, “I burned it down with you and Peter inside. And you carried me to the hospital.” He turned around, unflinching with the unwanted power of his spark muting any pain from his scars once again, to stare straight into Derek’s eyes. Into the horribly familiar way his jaw tightened and his green eyes sharpened. He waited for Derek to adjust his arms around his waist before he went on, “And when I left to try and go back in time, you even went to Scott to help find me.” He blinked slowly at the just as slow downturn of Derek’s brows, “I don’t understand how you could react like that.” Those green eyes darted down for just a fraction of a second before they rose again, “It’s complicated.” “Well,” Stiles said, “I didn’t think it would be simple.” Derek’s left eye twitched, and he licked his lips, “It’s not–” He huffed a little, shifting where he lay, “It felt like it was my fault you lost control like that.” Stiles said nothing. “The Other Stiles didn’t…” Derek’s eyes shifted away slightly, “He didn’t have to say much to convince me to keep you busy at the formal. I…” He frowned, “I guess I felt like I was…” Stiles got sick of waiting for him to finish that sentence awfully fast, “You know He’s not gonna be better than what we saw of Him just because you love me, right?” Derek met his gaze, steadfast, “You know he’s not another you, right?” Stiles’ stomach turned. “I said last night you don’t have a choice,” Derek nodded, “and I meant it. I love you, Stiles. And that means I love you even when you think you’re at your worst.” “You shouldn’t,” Stiles spat with narrowed eyes, “My worst is deadly, Derek. My worst is getting possessed and stringing together elaborate plots to kill and terrorise as many as possible. It’s wrecking my car. It’s shattering mirrors and vomiting and snapping necks and burning down houses.” The words flowed out of him like molten lava, “Blind faith is the killer of devotion, you remember that?”
Oh boy, oh boy. what a joyful conversation. yikes!! anyway. i am having a whale of a time writing this (how in the world is that actually a saying. are whales well known for their recreational fun???) and cannot wait for the like two people that r gonna read it wowowww
ofc no-pressure tag to the og gangster @patolemus (and anyone else who so wishes to share. please do!! love love love)
read the prequel (or the original fic i guess?), Twice And For All, here <3
#im scawweeddd#its gonna be posted in 6 weeks!!! what the fuck!!!!!!!!#every chapter of this fic has made me cry writing it so far#not like full-out cry but ive gotten misty-eyed as FREAK#apart from chapter 1 i think#it just made me like deeply angry#my fic#my fanfic#sterek fic#sterek#stiles stilinski#derek hale#teen wolf#teen wolf fic#third time's the charm#twice and for all#ao3
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I will not hear of any criticism of the narrative choice this episode made because I understand narrative parallels. Hope this helps <3
#there is NO WAY sunjae won't remember all of the timelines at the end. if thats not true then its not my fault its the writers#just learn to have fun and see patterns in media. come join me in this wonderful world#like this is EXACTLY where sunjae was in ep1. well kind of. but basically#the ONLY THING that could make me so angry that i drop the drama is if they teen beach movie 2 it#that would ENRAGE me#but like you guys. it is FINE. except for the serial killer things r gonna be totally fine#lovely runner
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A brain dump of thoughts after Agatha All Along ep 6:
Okay but like. The parallels between Agatha and Billy that we get to see now????
Both of their mothers chose to protect other people, complete strangers, over their own children??? Like. We know Wanda made the right choice, sacrificing her family for the greater good, but in her own twisted way did Evanora believe she was doing the same? Did she ever love her daughter? On some deep level, beneath the anger and hatred and warped sense of justice did it hurt her to try to kill her own child? She believed Agatha would bring countless death and destruction, that she was destined to be evil. As warped as her justifications were did she see it as a selfless sacrifice like Wanda's? Does that make it right? Does Billy have as much reason as Agatha to be angry with his mother for choosing to let him and his brother die? Do her truly selfless intentions matter to a child was just desperate to survive? Will he be able to forgive Wanda before that resentment is used against him? Is Agatha just trying to manipulate him by taunting him about Wanda or does she truly see a bit of herself in a child whose mother tried to kill him? (Edited)
Both of them were forced to do something horrible just to survive??? Agatha had to murder her own family. Billy had to steal the body of a boy who had just died. He had to pretend to be the child of these poor unsuspecting parents who just want their son back. Who have no idea their child is dead. The Kaplans will never get to bury William. He has to look them in the eye every single day knowing he's not really their son but what else was he supposed to do? He hates what he's doing to these people but what choice did he have? Could he even control it or did his soul instinctively seek out a new vessel to protect itself? Agatha was just a child who didn't want to die. Billy was just a child who didn't want to die. Were they selfish? Could they control it? Can we truly blame them if they could?
Both of them do terrible things when they feel backed into a corner or overwhelmed or emotional??? Things that they come to regret as soon as the emotions clear??? Billy looked horrified when he finally realized what he had done to Lilia and Jen but he's an intensely powerful and traumatized child who was overcome with grief and anger. Do we really think every single one of Agatha's kills was 100% self-defense? Do we really think she never killed someone in a fit of anger only to regret it after? And maybe Agatha has come to accept and embrace that now but she must have been like Billy when she was young. (Billy is literally the same age Agatha was when she killed her coven and was even younger when he took William's body) She must have been horrified at her power, at the things she did when she felt trapped. She must have bent over backward trying to defend herself and justify her own actions before realizing no one would believe she didn't want to do those things so she might as well embrace her power to its fullest potential ("I'm not that nice").
Both of them are walking the road for someone they lost??? I know Agatha says she's on the road for her power back but that's not how the road works, right? It doesn't give you what you want it gives you what you're missing. I think if Agatha was really able to get anything at all in the world, it wouldn't be her magic. Agatha is looking for Nicky. Billy is looking for Tommy. I don't know if either of them will really get that at the end but they are absolutely in this for the same reason.
I know there are mixed responses to this episode (at least when I first scrolled through the tag) but I for one really enjoyed it. I was really worried they were going to half-ass the explanation for why Billy was being Like This and fuck up one of the only queer Marvel Comics characters but comparing his actions to Agatha's and showing us this kid who is SO MUCH like how Agatha must have been when she was his age is so much fun actually. Like, it would have been really great but pacing-wise we probably couldn't have spent the necessary time going back into Agatha's past and diving deep into her progression from "scared child who does horrible things out of desperation for survival" to "cutthroat witch who is more than eager to hurt and betray others for her own personal gain". But we get to see it happen to Billy over the rest of the season and maybe even multiple MCU projects!!! Or maybe we'll get to see him make different choices. Maybe Agatha will be able to give him the chance no one gave her. Maybe history doesn't have to repeat itself. Maybe Billy's journey will give Agatha the chance to change her own story once and for all.
Idk this is really rambly and maybe my opinion will change as I think about it more but my first reactions are positive. Yeah on a meta level it sucks that the wlw couple is moving so slowly in their own show while the young, conventionally attractive mlm couple got to kiss within their first few minutes of screentime and they probably could have put in the effort to intentionally combat the miserable lesbians trope. But on a story level, I'm personally glad they're not rushing Agatha and Rio's arc. They're definitely going to get their moment but the reason they're so compelling is because of their history and the tragedy between them. We don't have all the details of what really happened between them yet but I don't think it's something you can just kiss and make up about. Billy and Eddie are teenagers with no real baggage between them. Agatha and Rio have possibly centuries of hurt and anger and betrayal to work through Let Them Cook! It'll be that much sweeter and their relationship is one of the CORE overarching plots of the show you don't want them to rush it. (Also I personally am too ace for the "we're gonna make up by having hot sex about it" type of conflict resolution and would have hated if Agatha and Rio were intimate before sorting at least some of their shit out but that's just me ik a lot of people would have enjoyed it and I'm sure it could have been really compelling but I actually cannot stand those kinds of plots most of the time.)
Also just keep in mind that the only other named queer characters we've had in the MCU literally ever are Phastos and Ben in the Eternals and like. Yeah it shouldn't have taken this long for a queer lead but the massive jump??? We went from one character (out of like ten mains) whose partner has minimal personality traits and like five minutes of screen time to a show with two main character on-screen queer romances!!!! In the Marvel Cinematic Universe??? And one of them is a season-long complex and interesting story that is a central plot of the series and not just half-baked fanservice!!! And one is just sweet innocent love between kids who care about each other!!! I do wish wlw stories didn't always have to come with attractive cis gay men but do y'all understand how huge this is for the MCU????? It shouldn't have taken this long and we can definitely criticize the negative tropes the show falls victim to but net positive progress is always something to be happy about. If you're not familiar with the greater MCU and the history of Marvel in general just understand that this is actually insane for them and I'm so excited for the doors that just opened for future queer storylines, but that can only happen if we show Marvel that, yes we do want queer characters being openly intimate on screen. Be happy for Billy, keep being happy for Agatha and Rio during all stages of their story and maybe we'll get to see more of this!!!
#i am literally gnawing at the walls about billy and agatha they're soooooo yes please give me more of this#yes this is agatha's show and she should be the center of it#yes we needed to see billy's backstory for his character to be fully-formed and to do the comics justice#two things can be true at the same time#again it is really frustrating on a meta level that the wlw couple had to get sidelined for an entire episode on their own show#but i also would have been really mad if they'd butchered such an important queer marvel character as billy kaplan#yes it's a very common trope of the wlw characters always suffering and fighting while the mlm characters just get to be happy#and the writers should be called out for it and we should be upset about it because they really should know better by now#yes billy and eddie are a monumental moment for the mcu and we need to celebrate that#because if they only see us angry about the SECOND EVER QUEER MCU COUPLE they'll use it as an excuse to cut queer storylines in the future#if y'all give them an excuse to think the reason you didn't like billy and eddie was because they're gay#and we get another twenty years of queerbaiting in marvel because yall couldn't be happy about baby steps for once i'm going to start bitin#ALSO ALSO last thing i swear but agatha harkness is not queer in the comics they GAVE us a new wlw relationship PLEASE be happy about that#agatha all along#agatha all along spoilers#agatha harkness#billy maximoff#teen agatha all along#mcu
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i have not read a lot of books in my adulthood and i have avoided the dreaded Booktok but my girlfriend (a librarian) and I read a book together that happened to be in the category of "female rage and female suffering is cool" part of booktok and I gotta say not only was it boring, repetitive (and not even in like a thematic way), deeply fatphobic, badly written, had net zero of anything to say but if all I have to do is look up the author's name on Tumblr and i'm immediately confronted with white-glorifying, thin-glorifying, lazy faux-feminist "feeeeemale suffering, This is Girlhood" and i swear to god unironic "femcel" shit then well. I don't know. But I really think we need to take booktok out back with a shotgun if it's going to have this impact on already sad, confused and depressed young teenage girls.
#the doctor is in#im not sharing the book but it was aaaaaaaass.#not plague#teens being depressed edgy and angry is not new#but i feel like this generation's boys and girls are becoming much more asocial and radicalized in different directions#and it WILL have an impact on society when they come to age i think
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