#I want to learn to cook for people. For myself. I want to cook like my momma does!

[sabreurs]

[ID: screenshot of a youtube video and five related comments.

the youtube video is entitled "A Japanese guy with schizophrenia cooks a miso soup." in the screenshot, he holds up a package of japanese spinach.

the comments are as follows:

"thyh7577: Hi. I am schizophrenic too. Its nice to see people like me, I know it's hard but it'll all be okay.

basiliachopin8719: I'm a cook with psychosis! You're a good content creator! I like you getting into prices and stuff.

blobymcblobface: I just wanted to say I'm also Schizophrenic. My parents made me learn to cook when I turned 12. I'm 29 now and haven't lost my love for cooking. Thanks, both for inspiring people to cook and for teaching them that schizophrenia isn't scary.

kovrizhka2: Hello! I live in Russia with some kind of disorder (I tend not to ask my doc to not scare myself, just silently and happily eating my meds...which somehow tend to be for schizophrenia folks? haha). And because my diagnosis is very light, I have the strength to support all my neurodivergent schizo and affective friends out there. We're all get through and live a happy life eventually... And eat delicious food! Cheers to you, chef!

Worsteverything: Both of my brothers have schizophrenia-- one of them is schizoaffective and the other is has just classic schizophrenia. I appreciate you sharing yourself with the world because people need to see that schizophrenia it NOT scary!! Schizophrenia is just a different way of experiencing life." end ID.]

peace and love on Earth..

[allthecanadianpolitics]

Hey, I know this isn't your normal content so feel free to not respond, but what's your opinion on the "socialization" issue (as in trans men are socialized as woman and trans woman are socialized as men before transitioning and it effects their personality) ? Recently I've seen a bunch of posts saying it's a bad thing to acknowledge. Like trans men and woman saying people who bring it up are trans misogynists. But personally, as a trans man with many trans fem friends I feel it's an important thing to see. In my view of things it's a larger part of sexism and what children are taught. By saying a trans woman was "socialized" as a man when she was a child I don't mean she was raised with a bunch of privileges. I'm often referring to what could be very traumatic and is a brand of trauma I probably can't relate to. Most trans woman I know where forcibly excluded from learning how to cook or clean even if they wanted to because those aren't "manly chores" and where not taught how to keep themselves safe the same way cis woman are. Or in the experience of my friends even beaten for wanting to do feminine things, not just by parents but also by peers. Where as most of the trans men I know can cook and clean like no ones business but no one taught them how to fix a sink or their car or how basic financing worked and they got hit for asking about it because "that's not a woman's place". And although I fully believe all children should be taught how to do all these things so they can take care of themselves, I am also aware that's not the society we currently live in and most trans men need help learning how to navigate things like not talking over woman (they're so used to having to scream to be heard) and how to fix a financial or household issue while alot of trans woman need their girlfriends to explain to them that they can't walk down a dimly lit street with their headphones covering both their ears. Idk maybe I'm just misunderstanding the whole thing but I think acknowledging socialization Is simply a step in learning how to take care of yourself and keep yourself safe in a world that didn't think you needed that info

I think there's some value as a way to understand the way that each gender was raised and the way gender roles are reinforced, but even so you can say I was 'socialized as a man' as I am a Trans Woman, but at the same time, I never really acted much like a man because the more I was socialized to act like a man, the more I gravitated towards feminine things that didn't cause me dysphoria.

I have a completely different lived experience growing up compared to a Cis man, even when I wasn't aware I was Trans.

I did have to do a lot of unlearning toxic masculine things and needing to learn essential feminine things as I came out and started living for myself and my gender expression, but a lot of the things that people say I was socialized as a man to, I just never did because they made me extremely uncomfortable. Its because I was never a man.

You can try to socialize a Trans person to act against their gender identity but a lot of the time, those gender roles just do not get enforced, because they're so toxic to your sense of self.

[hulloitsdani]

@moe-broey THANK YOU!!! AND IM GLAD THE RUFFLES ARE APPRECIATED!!!🎉🎉🎉

But seriously this is the highest compliment, because this is actively what I’m trying to do when it comes to how I draw Kiran! I really want to convey how unabashedly charming this silly little tactician is. It helps explain how they keep the order intact on a social level and also why this keeps happening:

In retrospect, Alfonse never really stood a chance, did he?

Anyway I won’t lie, I did all this for the Loki bit. Please imagine that she’s just off screen for all these outfits hitting that exact pose.

[sagehaubitze]

I made kheer (rice pudding) with leftover coconut rice and a bunch of date pieces and nuts, and like... ohh boy it falls into the danger zone of feeling like I'm eating very rich oatmeal and I'm questioning if I can just eat a bowl of this and claim it's dinner

(do not just eat dessert for dinner please)

[food-lover9000]

I think this is the time where I go back and try to research the fics of past and see what I liked about them and how they did things so I can try to know how to write yummy yummy fics slightly more then I currently do

[motherhenna]

So now that my brain is functioning a bit more correctly, I'm no longer totally overwhelmed by discord and groupchats and am actually interested in shooting the shit with other people. I've gone full adhd recently as far as getting into a million conversations in youtube comments and joining the discords of a few smaller youtubers I enjoy. So I was curious if any of you guys would be interested in joining a little discord server if I opened one? It would probably be mostly shitposts, maybe some WIP artwork, as well as talking about mental illness and health & fitness. I'm having so much fun documenting all my recent progress, and I figure it might be fun to get to know some of you better, especially my long-time mutuals. (No minors allowed tho--I'm a grown ass adult so I have no desire to hang around with any teens who aren't directly related to me lmao)

obviously my IRL friends who follow me on here would be more than welcome to join too lol so if any of you would be down for something like this, like or comment below so I can gauge interest! Maybe you could give suggestions for possible channel topics or whatever

[draw-you-coward]

this post from loish really made me think a bit. i stop myself from drawing intuitively so much that it’s a reflex at this point. somewhere along the line, “follow the reference” got so drilled into my head that it didn’t just leave when i learned anatomy. and it really built up frustration in me overtime with how stiff and soulless my art felt.

but i really do love the shape of the human body. the muscle pushing itself out and the fat deposits settling in and how things overlap and how weight sits. how bones structure everything, how tendons and ligaments connect everything. i guess i just need to have some faith that i’ll catch myself if i need to relearn how to do things from the ground up.

[enci-rebloggies]

This.

https://twitter.com/delaneykingrox/status/1090402436995473408

[planetarytransformation]

so many of the transfems i know spent their time pre-transition performing a kind of lifelong exercise in self-deprivation, the goal of which was to find out exactly how little a person needed to live. they starved themselves, dressed carelessly, shunned friends, and hollowed themselves out so as not to be burdens on anyone but themselves.

i see it now, too, in the girls around me. i'll ask if they want care – a home-cooked meal, relaxed company, sex without the expectation of reciprocation – and they say no, no, thank you, i don't need it; what would you like, what do you want, because in their head they're still doing that awful calculus, still training themselves to disappear in the eyes of the people around them.

i don't think i'd have died without transition – not in the conventional sense, at least – but to take that leap, i had to stop thinking of myself as a human experiment in fuel-efficient living and start nurturing the anemic, atrophied flame of desire in my heart. i had to learn to eat well, to exercise, to style myself beautiful, but harder than that, i had to learn to ask the people around me to work on my behalf in order to enrich my life and give me the things i wanted.

and i did it; i learned. and it was agony, but courage is a muscle you can train, and every day i get better at accepting gifts with the hungry gratitude i never learned in my years and years as a sad, scared, lonely boy.

so be patient with the trans girls in your life. better than that: be proactive, attentive, generous; be forceful, if you have to, and learn to distinguish real discomfort from the terrified reflex of self-denial that so many of us once learned to rely on.

and if you are so lucky as to love a trans girl, you must insist upon her. you must insist upon her happiness, her comfort, her pleasure, and her rest, because she may still not yet know how to make those demands for herself. if you can devote any amount of energy to becoming an engine that nurtures the flame of even a single tgirl then there is a place for you in trans heaven, which as far as i'm concerned is the only one worth going to

[phagodyke]

GRAAAAAAARGHHHHH okay im fine

[minminambus]

Hmm!

[shot-messenger]

sigh

[kerosene-saint]

I just want to be a kid again this time with better coping skills, an autism diagnosis, and less pressure to be completely independent all the time

[unearthlydream]

.

if there is one thing I’ve learned from all of the hands on medical care I��ve had to provide since 2016…. It’s fuck saving for my own retirement. I need to save so I can afford CNAs and at home care for my mom once she gets older. I don’t have the capacity to do this shit long term or be a primary caretaker. I’m so much at the end of my rope. I want to take a long walk off a short ledge and I feel so…. Morally inferior bc I just can’t do this shit without getting mad or frustrated.

I’ve always joked that I don’t have maternal bone in my body and that I have the evil brand of autism with low empathy thresholds so I can’t have kids or be a caretaker but holy fuck dude. Holy fuck. I couldn’t imagine having to do this everyday with someone with higher support needs. I can barely handle taking care of my grandfather and he’s not even mine to care for 100% I was just stepping in for a month to help.

And when it’s time for me to be cared for? Drop me off in the woods. I don’t want to put anyone through this.

[foldingfittedsheets]

I am a little creature largely made up of anxieties. There have been times in my life when it was worse. It’s currently significantly better. This story takes place at a time when it was pretty bad.

Food was a prison for me. I moved out early with very little idea of how to feed or care for myself. Every meal was a question mark. For three years I had Brendan doing most of the cooking but when things ended between us I moved in with some other friends. I suddenly had no way to feed myself again.

I was working at the sex shop and living with all my coworkers; a premise that would make sitcom writers weep. In that house, at the age of 24, I learned how to fry an egg. It was the only thing I knew how to do but by god, I mastered egg frying. I was so proud. I could now have one stress free meal a day of an egg on toast.

The problem was my roommates. Living with three other people is already tough but messes pile up alarmingly fast, especially in the kitchen. No one sees the whole mess as their responsibility but the one person who’s responsibility it absolutely wasn’t was mine, as I only ever cooked eggs. Glaciers moved quicker than the dishes got done, mountains of greasy unwashed dish ware were fixtures across the counters.

My friends occasionally cooked for me and each time I happily cleaned all the resulting dishes. This seemed fair.

But on my own I only used three implements for my egg. When I finished with my spatula, pan, and plate, I carefully washed them and set them to dry. Every time I came back to the kitchen there was nothing clean.

Crusted on ketchup, dried food, and unsavory residues plagued everything I needed to touch. So I ended up doing all the dishes twice, once to use my three implements and again once I was done.

I started to realize I’d come home, see the filthy pile of dishes, then go to bed without eating because I didn’t have the energy to wash it all. So I finally addressed my roommates about it. Please, I beseeched them, can these three things always be clean. I cannot function like this, and eating is already hard for me.

The answer returned: no. My request was deemed unreasonable and a counteroffer was made to turn off the small space heater I ran in my room in exchange for them magnanimously cleaning up after themselves. I declined, as my bones ached with cold everywhere except my room since no one else wanted the heat on. The impasse continued. I went to be hungry.

I noodled on it. I schemed. I plotted. And on my day off I went to a thrift shop and acquired a nice little pan and spatula. I squirreled them away into my closet. The plan was just to wash and dry it after meals and keep it in my room.

This is not how it went down. On day one of my pan coming home one of my roommates popped into my room to chat, glanced into my three quarters shut closet and immediately said, “What is that?”

I sighed and admitted my plan. All three roommates roundly condemned my plan as extremely passive aggressive. I tried once again to explain that I wasn’t eating, but my secret pan was now a source of contention, a precious resource held back from the collective.

Their discontent reached a fever pitch and I finally declared, “Fine! I will put my pan in the kitchen. On one condition. If I ever find this pan dirty, ever, I will scrape whatever is left on it into your bedding. I swear to god, if I ever come home to it being dirty there will be a reckoning.”

Terms were agreed.

The first month or two went okay. On the third month I awoke to eat breakfast and found my precious pan sullied. I grabbed it and marched upstairs. Betty was named as the culprit. I strode into Betty’s room and stood over her sleeping form like the vengeful ghost of dishes past.

“If you don’t get up and clean this right now I’m going to dump it on your bed.”

Betty groggily regarded me. “Seriously?”

“I have never been more serious.”

“It’s one time, can’t you just clean it yourself?”

“No. You promised.”

With much huffing and grousing Betty arose from bed and tromped downstairs, hastily cleaning my pan while I watched. “Happy?” She demanded.

I was. I made my egg, cheerfully cleaning the pan afterward, leaving it to dry.

[richarlotte]

How I got my life together.

Getting your life together, and I mean really getting it together, should be a priority of yours. You can’t miss out on your life by staying in a pattern of losing it all, pulling it together as quickly and as carelessly as you can, and then losing it all again because you weren’t ready enough or devoted the first time. I made a choice to pull my life together when I was 18, and I’ve stayed improving myself ever since; I bettered my mental health, fixed my body, changed my mindset, found an aesthetic and style that worked for me and that I loved, and have done my part to keep steadily improving my life and my mindset. If you are devoted to yourself and your life, you will do well and find that the path towards your future will become much clearer as time goes on.

Exercising.

You need to be exercising, bettering your body, and taking the time to nourish yourself and your health. This means eating whole meals and taking the time to cook and prepare them, considering removing heavily processed foods and alcohol from your day-to-day diet, and taking the time to do at home or in gym workouts. I do Move with Nicole videos in the morning, finish up with a quick yoga session, go to the gym in the evenings, and make sure that my body is being fueled by real foods and being properly hydrated throughout the day. You will live in the same body for the rest of your life; you need to make sure that you’re caring for it and nourishing it in ways that will let it support you for the rest of your life. You won’t regret a health journey, and you should actively be on one. 

Socializing.

Isolation will kill you, and if you already have anxiety, it will worsen it. You should be meeting people, getting to know them, leaving your comfort zone, and trying new things. Your late teens and early twenties are all about taking the time to know people, making and losing friends, and figuring out the sorts of people you want to have in your life forever. You have to socialize, go to social events, join clubs and different activities, and get out of the house. I’m a person who believes in spending time around and loving other people, and that has saved my life. If you aren’t sure how to socialize, don’t have friends, or aren’t sure of what you like, now’s the time to learn how. You don’t become good at meeting people in one day; it takes time and failure, but the more you do to leave your comfort zone, the easier it will become as time moves along.

Studying.

I believe that life is meant for learning. It’s important to always be learning, to always be bettering yourself, and to always be keeping your mind busy. While I strongly believe that every woman should have a university education and a degree, I understand that it’s not always feasible. If it’s not possible for you to get a degree, you have to learn a trade, a skill, a language, or find something to occupy your mind so that it’s not idle. It’s important to always be doing something, and it’s important that you’re pursuing a passion; life isn’t much if you’re not passionate about what you’re doing, so you have to find them and do more with them. Education can come from work experience; it can come from pursuing projects, cultivating wisdom, and spending your time nourishing your mind and reading books. Life is a learning experience, and you should be in constant pursuit of educational excellence. 

Seeing More.

Life is about seeing more and seeing things you’ve never experienced. If you’ve always wanted to watch a tennis match, step into the ocean, or see the sights in a new city, now’s the time to start making plans to do those things. We all deserve to see and experience beautiful things, so it’s important that we find the time to do so. If I hadn’t made the time to find beauty in the mundane, I wouldn’t have made it far. You don’t have to spend money pursuing beauty; I find the most beauty I’ve seen in my life is found on short walks and time spent around my city. You should spend your time both looking for beauty and becoming beautiful too.

Doing More.

Doing more is next. I’ve spent my life trying new things, failing, succeeding, having a good time, and learning about what I enjoy. You should be doing more; your twenties are for moving away, visiting new cities, trying new foods, working jobs you hate and finding jobs you love, going to new restaurants and getting into new relationships, and doing more with yourself. All of the greatest women I’ve ever known have told me that they spent next to no time resting in their twenties because they had so much life to live. I’d encourage you to do things without holding yourself back, and if you don’t know what to do with yourself, find things to do. You can't waste your youth being idle; now is the time to get out of your room, see the world and what it has to offer, and do more with yourself and your gifts.

Richarlotte x