#I should be writing Strange Days

[generalsdiary]

Moze x Jiaoqiu

warnings: none

word count: 900~

description: just them being domestic (pre-2.5 events)

moze is the type of husband who always cleans, keeps everything neat, he will run (quite literally) anywhere and do any errand without complaint, nothing is too hard or difficult for him. he is v protective, „I promise I will bring him back“, nothing is stopping him from getting his husband back, he is confident in his abilities, to the point he isn't even worrying. he always attentively listens to jiaoqiu’s ramblings, his full attention on the foxian. he will eat anything jiaoqiu puts before him, no matter his preferences. uttering simple praises after the meal and never letting his husband clean up.

at night he cuddles with him, being the big spoon, holding his husband close, face buried in the orangey pink hair. like a touch starved kitten, he gravitates to him during the day, always hugging him- backhugs are his favorite. jiaoqiu always smiles, a sparkle in his eyes with each embrace. moze is often quiet, very thoughtful- usually ending up blunt in his words but not cold, never cold. the care and love for each other shown in the soft words, gentle embraces and lingering gazes. moze doesn’t do causal touches, his hands don’t wander to jiaoqiu’s soft tail, or even softer ears, or to caress him. he doesn’t want to overwhelm his husband or make him uncomfortable. yet when they stand close he bumps his nose against his. and when he is so so tired he rests his forehead on the shorter man’s. recharging, seeking comfort, love. luckily for him, his husband knows his main love language is physical touch. jiaoqiu bringing his hands to cup his cheeks, thumbs caressing the rough skin. he misses the smile that brightens the foxian’s face, his eyes shut relishing in the sensations. such a sensitive and responsive man. jiaoqiu is the only person moze allows to touch him, to drag those soft fingers across his scars, through the silver hair, to see him shirtless. he is the only one with whom he makes and keeps eye contact. moze is the type of husband that even without being close jiaoqiu can feel his touch on him. sitting across him, over a hotpot. lilac eyes on him. full of love. as if he is caressing his husband’s cheek at that moment. making jiaoqiu’s chest feel warm from the feeling of such a silent expression of admiration.

on the days jiaoqiu voices that he feels tired a quick response is given in turn “I can carry you.” a blunt, straightforward, and the same offer every time. he is more than happy to carry him + he enjoys showing off for his hubby. not caring for the public opinion or any observers; it doesn’t even cross his mind, jiaoqiu’s happiness the only thing on his mind. sadly, he is always rejected (occasionally making him pout). moze doesn’t even know why (painfully obvious why, the rare blushed jiaoqiu further confirming it). shadows are his safe haven, but jiaoqiu is his peace. they fill each other's needs, like puzzles fitting together, completely domestic in their behaviors; perfect for general feixiao’s safety and well-being. despite working together they don’t get tired of each other. work is work and their house is home.

coriander is not allowed under this roof and no big lights are ever on. when they have guests, jiaoqiu compensates with many small lamps, fairy lights, and a bunch of candles. unscented ones. otherwise, they would clash with the meal. sometimes, jiaoqiu will light a scented candle, but it won’t be lit for longer than an hour, otherwise, he would get overwhelmed due to how sensitive his nose is to smells. moze being the clean freak, and insistent on maintaining really good hygiene and not strong perfumes so he can do his job perfectly would just make jiaoqiu purr if he could. type of husband truly only for him. jiaoqiu is quite a social butterfly and he drags his husband with him, who will grumble a bit and then go along, and behave politely to the best of his capabilities. moze cannot read a room to save his life, short in his sentences and straight to the point despite pondering his words prior, they end up always coming off blunt. he means no harm and what he says is usually of little matter, and none of it holds any weight to him when all he needs is to hear his darling chuckle or gaze at him and all is well in his world. the only result he could possibly ever wish for.

and when they kiss? the lighting and shadow with fire and spice? the I talk a lot, flirtatious, rarely flustered with I listen to you with heart eyes, mainly unaffected but you make me smile. well… they keep it private. such actions feel too personal and intimate for them to be shown in public and given for anyone to see on display. they hold it too close to their hearts, it matters in a different way to them. something near and dear. they won’t be caught showing pda, not even holding hands- well they rarely hold hands either way. it is behind closed doors and in the privacy of their home that their lips meet, and hands wander, leaving soft touches in intimate places that they’d never do in public (unlike many others). it means too much to them.

[icewindandboringhorror]

sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:

thing that I already do

thing I have tried 10 times

thing I already do

thing that I don't have the money to do

thing I already do

thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail

thing that is impossible given my situation

thing that doesn't apply to me

thing that I already do

thing I have already tried

hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently

thing I have already done

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

oh man ok i need to gush about moonlight chicken for a second lol

i adored how this show didnt shy away from the messiness of real life and relationships! like u hav a single gay working class man desperately trying to make ends meet and struggling with the guilt of his past lover having died tragically whilst bringing up his nephew who wants to be taken seriously and finally fly the nest to live his own life whilst at the same time navigating his crush on a lonely deaf boy who just wants to be understood and respected. and then you have a man stuck in relationship limbo where he's unable to let go of his past love but also yearning to move on and free them both from the pain they cause each other... and that's not even to mention the side characters who deal with the loss of parents, unfaithful partners, unplanned pregnancies, trying to be a better mother to your son, etc...

no one was a villain, instead you had a group of people who needed to grow and learn in a very natural way, and that's just so refreshing to see! honestly one of my fav parts of the story is that rather than inventing some arbitrary dramatic reason for wen and alan to break up, it just happened because their love had fizzled out, a thing that happens all the time in real relationships! and even though their love had died, it was still obvious that they cared deeply for one another which made both of them trying to move on so much more painful...

so much of this show was about the cycles of emotional abuse that can develop when you're stuck in the past... jim is unable to see a happy future for himself because he blames himself for beam's death, and he let's that anger and resentment inform how he treats li ming. wen is ignoring the messiness of his relationship with alan in favour of pursuing jim, but knows deep down that neither will be able to truly move on unless he deals with the situation. even heart's parents are stuck unable to relate to or be willing to understand their deaf son as they continue to isolate him from the outside world, thinking that it will protect him but all it does is make him even more lonely!

idk i just loved how the show focused so much on living in the moment. that the past is fixed and the future is uncertain, but there will always be now where you can always find some glimmer of joy and optimism.

and then there's ofc the queer element of the show where we get to see how internalised and external homophobia exist as perimeters to queer people being able to truly be themselves. one of the most heart wrenching scenes is at beam's funeral where his parents come up to jim and effectively tell him that because he and beam weren't married, he has no legal rights to any of the things they had worked so hard for together! and this is something you hear time and time again, both historically and now, where queer couples in countries that dont recognise gay marriage or even civil partnerships are denied so much (particularly when one of them dies) because their relationship is deemed illegitimate by law.

jim as a character has internalised this so much that when he finds out his nephew is gay, he lashes out (in one of the funniest scenes ever, mind you lol... literally the whole 'why are you gay, isn't being poor enough of a challenge!?' thing is gonna stick in my mind forever i love it sm lol) because he knows first hand how hard it is to be a queer man in a society that still doesnt fully accept you! (and it rly showed the disparity between him, a working class man, and wen, someone from a middle class/wealthy background when it comes to queerness that i don't think gets discussed as much... cos the fact of the matter is that for a long time queerness /was/ effectively reserved for wealthy people, as working class people wouldnt have had as much of a choice in how they could live their lives, so jim's reticence when it comes to accepting li ming's (and his own) queerness is directly tied to how being poor doesnt always allow you the luxury of simply 'being yourself'...)

and i think it was especially interesting that this show didnt present homophobia in individualistic terms. we don't get a character calling them slurs or saying that they're wrong for being gay, instead we get systemic and societal prejudices showing up in insidious ways, which feels so much more realistic! (like even jam, who is presented as having outdated and homophobic opinions, isnt presented as some evil villain. she's just a product of a homophobic society that teaches people being gay is a sad way of living, and she has to unlearn that as both her brother and son prove her wrong!)

i honestly could (and probably will) go on but yeh... this show man... this show

[lupins-hehim-pussy]

I think I accidentally made Wriothesley AuDHD. fuck

[lonely--seeker]

I think I'm going insane. Lately my dreams have been so mundane, it wouldn't be weird if I wasn't just a person that has nightmares 80% of the time, so I now my dreams are so hard to distinguish from reality.

I wouldn't be able tell what was real from what not if it wasn't because last night I went to my doctor's appointment and I was handed new glasses by Harvey just to go back home and find out Laois was cooking something in my backyard.

[ilgaksu]

i’ve been gently bullied into sharing some heihua extended universe lore. all of the fics i write for heihua interact with each other in callbacks and motifs and relationship development, so there’s a joke about it as an extended universe now, since we’re nearly at 40 fics (i don’t know how either).  and one of these is that look how long this love can hold its breath is deliberately echoing all the fics that have come before it. it’s a story where for once, xiao hua, who is horrible at emotional expression, is trying to express love to a hei xiazi who is at one of the most vulnerable points physically/emotionally/mentally he’s been so far - and if you look carefully, he’s mimicking all the behaviour hei xiazi has shown him in the past. he washes his hair for him. he gives him clothes. he brings him painkillers and food and water. he tries to initate sex. he brings him more food. he tries that tragically executed massage. those are all things that, if you consider the timeline, he’s had hei xiazi do in the past (wicked and loving lies takes place over a year before this fic, for example). it’s someone who doesn’t know how to show love in a romantic relationship because he’s rarely seen it modelled in a way he would feel able to show, who is then trying to mirror all the ways he’s been made to feel loved and safe by hei xiazi. and listen, if your heihua isn’t about mirroring and being mirrors of each other in multiple ways, what has it all been for, et cetera.  

[lightblueminecraftorchid]

it’s not fair that so much of my memory and cognitive function is tied up in something I cannot control or reasonably prevent

[werewolfsmile]

I was tagged by @lindseymcdonaldseyelashes to put my music on shuffle and list the first 10 songs + tag 10 people.

The Hero - Nathan Wagner

Come Over (Acoustic Mixtape) - Sam Hunt

Red Earth Dirt - Greta Stanley

Power Over Me - Dermot Kennedy

Should Have Known Better - Jessie James Decker

Till There's Nothing Left - Cam

Howl - Florence + The Machine

Heavy Stone - Kyla La Grange

Right Here - Ashes Remain

The House Rules - Christian Kane

Tagging: @independent-fics @dinotoaster @vampiritea @undisclosed-serendipity @sagiow @combat-librarian + anyone else who wants to do this, just say I tagged you!

[zeawesomebirdie]

Only took a week and a half, but guess who finally actually feels sick with covid 😔✌️

[lotharkarnstein]

Through a mirror darkly. And here the man who holds the glass is darker still. L’rell. Defeated in armed combat after a bioengineered virus decimated his Klingon homeworld. The Romulans. All (presumed) dead after committing mass suicide to prevent being subjugated by the Terran Empire. And Sarek. Ambassador Sarek. Decapitated on the steps of the Vulcan Science Academy in front of a crowd that included his wife and son. And all carried out by the same withering hand... the greatest general Earth has ever seen. The most bloodthirsty, merciless, ruthless tyrant to ever set out to conquer the galaxy. Khan Noonien-Singh.

—

My real name is La'an Noonien-Singh. My ancestor is Khan Noonien-Singh. And his legacy is genocide, torture… and me.

[oops-all-stephen]

hey, here’s a spooky concept! :•)

(disclaimer: this isn’t trying to be canon-compliant in any way. i don’t even know the full details of stephen’s magical diet, but i know that it isn’t this!)

imagine mcu stephen developing the strange “diet” that he has in the comics. only, at first he has no idea what he’s suddenly so hungry for….

imagine stephen becoming very weak once human food starts to make him ill whenever he attempts to consume any. and imagine book pages, and cardigan sleeves - even the eye of agamotto - all becoming littered with teeth and bite marks from this new desperation that stephen feels, no answers in sight as to why he’s suddenly so hungry and so utterly insatiable…. it isn’t until stephen is working alongside some of his more “alien-like” allies that the answer becomes clear.

if the hunger before was this terrible, ever-present nagging in his gut, leaving him dazed and weak and mindless…..now it’s just unbearable. he’s approaching his allies when suddenly: he’s wide-awake and….strong?! he feels alert and his body is poised to attack like an animal laser-focusing on its target. in stephen’s desperation to keep from pouncing and devouring one of his friends like a feral beast, he bites a chunk out of his own arm instead.

he ends up being forced into a mental institution (with one of those Hannibal Lecter-esque masks), the witnesses of that fiasco as well as the doctors believing he’s exhibiting cannibalistic tendencies.

but how to explain to them that the truth is actually… quite the opposite? that he’s become something of a…. reverse werewolf? instead of becoming a monster who hungers for human flesh, stephen has become a human who hungers for the flesh of those very monsters….

[ace-malarky]

No thoughts just Kaua and Llinos having italicised 'oh' moments over each other

~

It happens like this; there is a fight. Kaua jumps into the fray, sword in both hands as she stamps down the fear (it was an ambush but it was their ambush, their plan, this was what they wanted) and lets curses fly from her beak that do just as much damage as her sword. She is alone along the side of the path with a handful of bandits spilling from the trees, faltering when she charges to meet them. An arrow thwips towards her; she hears it as an afterthought, in the same instance as wood breaks and a breeze whistles by her in the wake of something. Kaua chances a glance to the side as she shoulders one man back, giving herself breathing room. There's the arrow, black wood and goode-grey feathers, but partway through the shaft is a red shafted arrow driven through it like a nail, fletched with raven-black feathers. It's stabbed into the ground, and the black arrow's shaft breaks around it and falls into the dirt. One of her opponents falls with a cry, an arrow sprouting from his leg. Kaua snaps her gaze up as she hears Rhydderch scream of a bark, spots the red fox unerringly as he streaks out of the trees. She should focus, she's lost seconds, she's still in a fight but oh There's Llinos, hooked onto a tree and out of range, bow in hand, eyes on the bandits. The clash of metal is a discordant shriek that should yank Kaua's attention back and it does but she's relying on muscle memory, unable (unwilling) to look away from Llinos in the trees as she fires again and again, each arrow hitting its target. And Kaua's heart sings. * It happens like this; Llinos spins to a halt on the outskirts of the dance and looks up towards the stage, breathing, and there Kaua is; just off centre, on the edges of the circle of light that illuminates the band leader. She's bent over her ukulele, attention on nothing else - her eyes might be closed, actually - and head tilted, bobbing slightly, fingers flicking over the strings and Llinos Everything fades and Llinos holds in the moment, on her toes, ready to spin back in, and she thinks oh and the light is soft against the iridescence of Kaua's feathers and Llinos is Oh, she's gone, arrow to the heart and all. She stumbles as Jasper catches up her hand, brings her back into the dance, and she can't see Kaua any longer but she wants to believe she can hear that ukulele above everything, even Jasper's unanswered question and huffed laughter at the dazed expression she must be wearing.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[patzweigz]

randomly hit with just how. strange. it really is that general discussion of fictional characters treats them as like... people, who's actions have consequences in the real world or who's writers put them through real situations

[unusualsims]

🛸

[hua-fei-hua]

through a series of Wacky Hijinks(tm), i ended up on a livejournal post where someone basically details LiveJournal Social Etiquette (holy grail. to me), and it's actually really interesting to see just how much the concept of tumblr as like, a communal social space, and our modern ideas of "mutual"-hood, and just like, the deeply community-oriented netview (worldview but regarding the internet) of this website seems to echo the environment of lj in its heyday.

like, i've been doing research abt lj out of personal curiosity for quite a while now (if any of you were there, gandalf, pls tell me abt it), and at first it just seemed like such a foreign concept to me. what were the social rules? how did people congregate? how did they form, like, their webs?

but the more i uncover via (not-asking-people-directly-because-if-i-initiate-social-interaction-i-will-wither-into-a-prune) general internet spelunking, the more i've come to realize that like many aspects of humanity, the more things change, the more they will also remain the same. and i just think that's so terribly endearing