#I never fucking post my writing here my god
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puppywilliams · 2 days ago
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just to ruin things.
summary: you and ellie’s cant run from your past forever.
warnings: toxic!ellie, mentions of drugs (cocaine), mentions of alcohol consumption, mentions of relapsing, angst, implied bi reader
a/n: hi! ive been sooo very busy but heres a little smth i wrote! this might be boring but i need to post </3 also listened to memories by conan gray while writing this if you care
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some stupid party got you exactly where you always ended up. in ellies truck. it made you so fucking angry the way she always swooped in to save that day like she was some superhero, like she was doing you a favor. you couldn’t blame her too much, you always gave in like a lost dog finding its owner.
part of you Needed her to save you, the unfortunate truth you weren’t ready to unfold, its one you couldn’t face in fear of what it might do to the wall you’ve spent Too long already rebuilding, 7 months and 13 days of rebuilding to be exact. you tell yourself you’re not counting, its just an estimate. like this, its just friendly, this is what friends do. they drive you home. you’re not even that drunk, you knew you were getting into her car, you knew you were letting her right back into the place you needed to keep her out of the most.
her eyes were straight on the road with her knuckles around the steering wheel. you looked at her, freckles splatted across her face like god himself hand picked each one. “youre a fucking idiot you know that? all over that guy? you dont even know him. he couldve slipped something in your drink, youre gonna get yourself killed.” she spat venom through the atmosphere, turning everything sour like she managed to do every damn time.
“fuck you.” you spat back. it wasnt worth it, never was nor ever had been. but ellie argued either way.
“what? you still cant handle the truth?” she piled on, it was like a never ending mound of what you did that she didn’t like or approved of, it pushed your buttons in a way ellie knew it would. when you spend enough time together, the memories you’ve engraved into your head don’t expire. ellie knew you like she practiced your coding. every nook, every cranny, every corner, every place she knew and altered as she pleased. ruining you every time without so much as an apology. it angered you so much, for someone who swore she didnt care, it hurt.
you looked down and fiddled with the hem of your dress, hyper focusing in on one thing so you didnt burst like a can of shaken soda, youd been on the edge of your breaking point since you had broken up. so many words you didn’t say, so many words you wish you didn’t say.
“cant speak now? what? have too much to drink? bet you remember that guy you were all over. probably remember him more than you remember anything about me.” she pierced daggers right into your pressure points, only fueling the fire that endorsed your temper.
you took a breath before turning your head to look at her. “you dont have the right ellie. youre a fucking loser. you know that?” you looked right at her. the way you knew she despised when she couldn’t meet your gaze. “i dont Need you to save me, we’re long past that. what i do and who i do is none of your god damn business!” you threw your hands into the air finally letting yourself lose your calm facade, not missing a beat in fear she might cut in and ruin what you know you Need to say, for yourself and maybe its a plead. you dont think, only spoke.
“youre acting like when we were together you didnt drink your ass off every fucking night. sitting on My couch, watching My tv, crawling into My bed pissed out of your mind, you dont have any idea do you? none?” you breathed heavily with tears in your eyes looking Right at her before moving your gaze again to meet the hem of you dress. knowing the battle you say is with ellie, is actually with yourself. its one you always lose. “im so fucking m-mad at you still..i dont need this, or to see you at all…id listen to silence and see nothing but black just to know id never get confirmation you still existed..i cant stand you..” ellie stayed silent, the way she always did. white knuckles gripped over the steering wheel, her jaw clenched, but you see the gloss over her eyes. you see the way she breathes like shes making sure its the perfect rhythm.
you closed your eyes, the silence was so deafening you thought you got your wish, but she opened her mouth proving you wrong and teaching you once again to not get your hopes up.
“you want me to got care anymore? you fucking got it.” she put it simple, you should be grateful but you cant seem to be. its your weakness, and its one you’ll never strengthen, her weight always dragging you back down like a purgatory, but your shackles will never be lifted, so potentially its a sugarcoated way of calling it hell.
you turn to look out the window. “thank god.” you utter under your breath, a chunk of your soul hopes she doesn’t hear, of course she does. “dont ask me to pick you up at 11pm anymore. im not coming.”
she makes a good point, a great one even. one that not even you could manage to figure out if you tried.
“then stop picking up.” its all you say, its all you Needed to say. you glance at the way shes losing internal fight in the torn up seat of her truck.
“you know i cant do that..” she whispers as a single tear falls from her eye. she tries to wipe it away with the knuckle bound to her thumb before you see. “i know.”
“then why? why pull me in to push me away? why?! why do you do it?” you fall silent, its a conversation you hadn’t prepared for, but its a hole you dug so long ago it feels like centuries, but like every past, it catches up to you. its something so long overdue it churns your stomach like a knot in a rope you cant seem to unravel. “what am i meant to do ellie? come crawling back to your doorstep and repeat everything i spent so long trying to mend myself back together over? seeing your face is the worst kind of relapse. its a reminder of what i worked for, to self sooth for months and act like kissing someone else doesn’t still feel like cheating. i do what i Have to do ellie, i cant plead with you, not when youre not mine and im not yours, because just like you. i have no fucking right..” your voice shook with emotions you didn’t know you we’re still capable of feeling.
ellie doesn’t try to hide her tears anymore, its pointless. its something rare, something you so selfishly cherish. its like feeding a sweet tooth that cant be settled unless you have empathy, you crave it every day knowing you never got it. you tell yourself shes crying for You and not yourself, its the fix of what will get you through this conversation, through tonight, and through next week.
“you think thats what i want?” she dryly chuckles before scoffing, using her pointer and thumb to wipe at her tear ducts. you fucking hate it. “you think thats what i want? i want you to be happy believe it or not, even if its not me. but god damn, it kills me seeing you with someone else and you dont even Care.”
you take her words as something thats malicious, but deep down somewhere in your heart you know its just the truth, maybe you’re not ready for this, you might never be. “you made that decision a long time ago. its out of my control now.”
her face hardened and her eyes stayed put on the road ahead. “you gave up on me. you put everyone else and everything else before me, was i supposed to stay?” she breathes out through her nostrils. you looked at her like she had said something outrageous, like it was a life altering claim.
“thats what you think huh?” you scoffed rolling your eyes and crossing your arms over your chest looking back out the window.
she raised her voice, her temper always did run thin. something you didn’t miss. “yeah, it is!” she bit the inside of her cheek and took a deep inhale.
“no ellie. i tried, and thats what you never give me credit for. i tried to help you get sober, i payed for your rehab bill so you could come back home to me, but the first thing you did when you got home was snort a line before you even looked my way. we’re not dogs, i cant lick your wounds and tell you they’ll heal, i had myself to worry for. you put drugs above me, so i stopped trying. i stopped begging you.” she fell silent for what you hoped would be the last time tonight, you watched the way she went to speak but shut herself up.
her voice still appeared a few seconds later. “i know i was an addict, i know i fucked up but you gave up on me regardless.” you looked at the tense expression she had as she drove, not even sure if she was driving in the right direction anymore. as much as you
wanted this to all be over you couldn’t bring yourself to care.
“you gave up on yourself. i didn’t even get a sorry.” you said dryly, looking back at your feet. everything seemed to consume you. “well im saying sorry now. and for the record i still love you.”
you wanted to recoil, to scream at her and tell her to fuck off, but you softened. you wiped your eyes, sniffling. “i still love you too, it drives me crazy.”
it was the truth, one you ran from. something you denied to your friends and family, knowing if you said anything remotely to the truth you’d see the way their face morph into an disapproving expression.
“i know ill never have you again, but for what its worth i’m thankful you were mine.” its something ellie never intended to say out loud but she used every resource she could.
you gave in to something she wasn’t even asking for, just something you needed to ruin you.
“for what its worth if you asked me to be yours again i don’t think i could say no.”
“then dont say no.”
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crimsoncandy04 · 13 hours ago
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Hi! you write such arousing posts…. Can I ask for sex after a fight in the car with Scaramouche
Anon🪭
Oooh...is this my first modern au commission? Alright let's do this!
(you didn't mention what kind of sex so I'm taking creative liberty here and imagining what kind of sexy things an irl Scaramouche would be doing basically.)
Enjoy;)
Your boyfriend was the absolute WORST. But due to being blackmailed by him into a relationship because you saw something you shouldn't have regarding his job, you had no choice but to put up with him.
He was such an asshole. Full of himself and never really kind or doting despite him clearly being jealous whenever you so much as even MENTIONED another man's name in conversation.
It was absurd. You thought that being one of the 12 CEOs of such a powerful political organization such as The Fatui would make him act with a little more class. But no. He was as ruthless as he was cold. You were no exception.
At least he was a field agent.
Which meant he was always away doing jobs in other countries most of the time.
You were usually left to your own devices. Not that you minded.
In fact, lately you had begun to use this free time to... entertain yourself.
And that entertainment involved your boyfriend Scaramouche's coworker, Tartaglia.
Gods he was so fucking good in bed.
Always so giving and attentive. Nothing like the usual one and done your partner was.
He'd hear the founder of the fatui had sent Scaramouche out again and within the hour he'd be at your manor with flowers and expensive chocolates in hand. Cock already hard and aching to be under your favorite black dress that you usually wore when seeing him. It always made your ass look so fucking great and obviously, Tartaglia was a man who knew how to appreciate a curvaceous lady like you as he'd do things like pound you from the back and smack your ass as he told you make it "tighter" for him. God could he last a while. You think he took it as a challenge sometimes.
You loved your little heated affairs with Tartles. But finally one night your luck would run out. And that was the night Scaramouche came back early from a failed mission to steal government secrets via an elite gathering.
He had been caught and was now being forced to take time off as the company founder (Ms. Tsaritsa) had to cool foreign tensions now and cover for her harbinger's mistake.
He had walked in on you both as Tartaglia had you bent over the sofa downstairs and immediately tore into him. He had grabbed Tartaglia by the back of his shirt and thrown him (Quite literally threw him) Into the wall behind you. You had quickly pulled down your dress just in time to see Scaramouche kick him in the stomach and pull out a taser he usually kept in his coat pocket. He slammed it against Tartaglia's neck and turned it on. Temporarily rendering the man unconscious as Scaramouche had moved faster than anyone you had ever seen and successfully caught Tartaglia off guard.
He then turned to you.
His indigo eyes were beyond livid. For a second you wondered if you were next. But to your shock and suspicion, Scaramouche simply repocketed his weapon and turned to leave. Only pausing to tell a nearby maid to clean everything up before he disappeared into another room entirely.
You immediately went to your room. The one that was just for you and your hobbies and hid for the rest of the night. Too terrified to face Scaramouche anytime soon. Maybe he knew you were hiding though. Because at some point you received a text from him in the middle of the night. It read;
"Tomorrow night, be outside the house and ready. I want to talk to you privately so we'll be going somewhere a little more secluded. Dress nice."
And that was that.
Oh fuck. He was going to kill and bury you wasn't he?
The time to leave came. You had decided to wear a rather short soft pink cocktail dress and white heels. It wasn't your best but you were trying to perhaps invoke some sort of psychological empathy in your boyfriend tonight by wearing "innocent" colors.
Maybe that was a terrible idea.
Because as you climbed into the passenger seat of his car and felt his gaze tearing you apart from the side, you wondered if he had had something else in mind when he originally asked you to dress nicely.
His tone was bitter.
"you've looked better. What? Ran out of stuff to wear after using them all to seduce every man you see perhaps?"
The fuck? I wasn't letting this slide.
"seriously? I'm not that desperate. I only met with Tartaglia a few times and only him. Maybe if YOU weren't such an asshole I'd have no desire to fuck another dick!"
His voice bordered on emotionless as he started the car now.
"i told you before, you ungrateful whore, I have a job to do. You are NOT a priority. In fact, many women would KILL to wear the things I buy you. To sleep in the place where you do, to be on their knees WORSHIPPING me no matter how I treat them. You should be grateful someone like me even bothered to look your way at all, bitch."
"oh really!? Someone who IGNORES me? Someone who BULLIES me? DENIES me ANY sort of company besides their own that even then they RARELY give me? If that's the kind of person you are then perhaps I no longer want to date you!"
He abruptly hit the breaks. Turning in his seat to face me as he suddenly grabbed my chin and forced me to meet his gaze.
"I give you everything and even now you whine like a spoiled brat for more. So is that it? You want attention? Hmm...I don't see why not."
He started the car again. Not bothering to speak to you after that.
Scaramouche drove you both to the edge of the city. It was snowing here still and appeared to be some kind of parking lot of a nearby abandoned factory.
You felt your entire body stiffen as he got out of the car and instead climbed into the back seat.
What was he doing?
His sharp tone suddenly caught your attention.
"get up. Don't get out of the car. Crawl over the seat."
Shivers ran down your spine.
But you did as told.
However just as you were attempting to squeeze through the gap in between the seats, he stopped you. Telling you to stay in the position you were in and open your legs more.
Your heart raced as you realized the only way to do that would be to keep your feet firmly planted on either seat in the front and to hold on to the head rests with your hands so you didn't fall.
You got into position, earning a small hum of approval from Scaramouche.
"just like that. Now don't move. If you do, I'll make you regret it."
Scaramouche then reached out and slid his hand under my panties. Three of his fingers were deep inside your pussy and almost a little too gently were they stretching you open and encouraging you to relax into his touch.
You felt a little moan leave your lips before Scaramouche pulled his fingers out of you then and instead tore off your underwear completely.
Your cunt was exposed to him fully now as you watched him pull something from his pocket then.
A small egg shaped vibrator that he carefully stuffed into your still aching cunt and then turned on using a small remote that came with it. Immediately it was set too high and you felt your legs tremble as the tiny device teased your insides and made you drip into the cup holder beneath. Scaramouche rubbed some of your wetness using his fingers again, from your pussy to your asshole. Your body shook a little now as you tried to instinctively close your legs only to be met with a hard slap across the face from Scaramouche.
"i told you to stay still you worthless cunt! How fucking dare you!"
Scaramouche eyed the area beneath you then. A cruel smile crossed his face as he went to coat his fingers in more of your delicious juices and then used it to coat the gear stick that was brushing against your ass. He whispered huskily in your ear
"fuck yourself with it bitch."
Confusion filled you.
"w-what? But I'm already-"
"use your ass. Don't make me ask again. If you refuse, I'll make you do something worse."
Scaramouche's threat was made plain and clear. And so as you slowly adjusted your footing and raised your ass to prepare to do the unthinkable, you felt tears begin to fall from your eyes.
Scaramouche just scoffed at you.
The cold plastic material slowly entered your tight hole as you winced at the sensation of being stretched so much. It took several long minutes but eventually with much sweat and tears, you got the gear stick to fit into your asshole.
"Bounce on it. Look at me when you do." Scaramouche commanded next.
You obeyed reluctantly, your pussy still aching and soaking wet as the vibrator continued to tease your g spot.
You found a rhythm and began to ride the excruciatingly large object as best as you could. A mixture of pleasure and pain filling every inch of your body as Scaramouche leaned back and watched you humiliate yourself. All the while he had freed his cock and had been jerking off to the sight of you. You moaned softly as you felt your climax approaching then. However the feeling of pleasure was cut short momentarily as you saw Scaramouche pull out his phone.
"don't stop. I didn't say you could."
Your body trembles.
"what are you -"
"giving you exactly what you wanted my lovely little slut. Attention. Now keep going. I want to see you cum from being punished like this. The way a cheating whore like you deserves."
Scaramouche had started recording.
And so you continued to do as you were before. You kept going until you felt your body shiver and your cunt pulse as you ended up squirting. Scaramouche just chuckled a little before continuing to record you as he stroked his cock in the other hand.
"you did well my sweet little bitch. How about we let Tartaglia see what a good girl you were for me today?"
You felt panic cross your mind at the thought.
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pinkaditty · 21 hours ago
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Who's Passing NNN? Tokyo Debunker
sigh
a/n: this is extremely low effort but in my defense im pretty sure i was drugged on halloween. *ahem* originally this was SUPPOSED to be low effort but clearly i got way too into it. anyways. i’ve been working a lot lately which is why i don’t have many works out rn! i work weekdays from 8 in the MORNING so it’s a lot going on but i use what little free time i have yk? ntm i have MULTIPLE projects im also working on 4 a different site so it’s a lot. i don’t think anyone’s gonna read this but im working on being a vtuber so its lots of prep lmfao! and with that, my weekends are mostly spent sleeping or with friends, but i really enjoy my work. ill be going back 2 school eventually so i need 2 figure out how the hell im gonna make that work, but i will. amen. pray 4 me y’all. oh also reqs r still being worked on i promise. just gotta get this fucking schedule under wraps.  anyways. this came 2 me on a random sunday (betraying the lord as usual) and i decided. lets write porn. i wanna do something silly bc my friends have been panicking abt climate change and its rubbing off on me. amen! quick disclaimer that i write these under the assumption the tokyo debunker boys are at least 18 years old. they appear to be present at a university considering there are professors and a chancellor. not to mention the boys drink, smoke, gamble, and refer to themselves as adults.
summary: who out of the tokyo debunker boys will pass nnn? who will fail? cliche i know but let me have this
cw: jerking off i guess. mc mentioned but no physical appearance described. MINORS DNI!!!!!!! Frostheim || Vagastrom || Jabberwock || Sinostra || Hotarubi || Obscuary || Mortkranken (before you ask vagastrom and jabberwock r already written jus not posted yet)
MINORS DNI AS PER USUAL TY FOR RESPECTING MY BOUNDARY!
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Frostheim:
Jin Kamurai: Pass
Pretty touch and go with this guy. He’s never heard of it before, so when it’s a sudden trend around campus, he’s not visibly piqued, but he is… interested. Outwardly, he’d think it’s absolutely fucking ridiculous. Inwardly? He’d want to do it to prove something to himself. Of course, on the rare occasion he has an odd dream… well, he prioritizes his own pleasure over some pathetic game. 
He finally wakes up from a rather interesting he just had after lounging around and avoiding his work. You’re supposed to be coming soon to drop off some documents. Maybe that’s why you were in his dream. Hmph… What, he dreams of his… servants, now? Rolling over proves to be a challenge when his half-hard cock jumps at the slightest shift of his sheets. Now this? Well, he won’t hesitate to take care of it. A simple pillow will do the trick. In mere moments he’s humping into a large pillow, burying his face in one end and thrusting his hardening clothed cock in the other end. The friction more than satisfies his needs. He’s so focused on it that his vision swims, most of his body going slack except for his arms squeezing the pillow taut to his chest and his hips insistently searching deeper, warmer, and wishing for wetter, tighter. When it’s all over, and his focused expression melts into a slack-jawed, bleary-eyed one, he knows he’d much rather stay here, in his sheets. His warm, sticky release, however, will eventually turn uncomfortably cold, and he knew you were on your way. 
Tohma Ishibashi: Pass
He’s participating because he knows Jin is participating. That’s really all there is to it. He’s not interested in any clout or anything, just thinks it’s funny. He doesn’t do this too frequently, but often enough to keep his rocks off, you know? Sometimes, though, he doesn’t really get any free time for months cleaning up after Jin, so… It’s those times that are more interesting. 
He tries rather hard to go slow for the sake of savoring it, but fails miserably - it’s been months, after all. His uniform is much too hot to be doing this in, but god forbid he waits another minute. A sweaty collar and cum-stained slacks could be washed, anyway. Despite starting with slow strokes, before he knows it, his hand is wrapped around his dick, rubbing furiously like there’s no tomorrow. His other hand claws into the bedsheets beneath him, pulling them every which way. His face contorts into a number of different expressions: his jaw clenched tight and his eyes narrowed harshly, or his jaw slack with his tongue lolling out and his eyes rolling to the back of his skull, or even his lips pressed tight together to stifle moans with his eyes screwed shut just as well. Regardless, he’s enjoying himself and desperately trying to keep a hold of himself. Finally, when the wave of pleasure comes, he presses his face into his pillow, knowing it’s hopeless to attempt to keep quiet. He spills more than he intends every single time, and when he collapses on himself, feels his dampened body melt into his equally dampened sheets. His hair is disheveled, his uniform is sloppy, and his monocle slips off his face. Fuck. He’d have some washing to do. 
Lucas Errant: Pass
Do you think this guy masturbates? Like genuinely? I don’t doubt it but I think if he was challenged to go a month without it he’d manage fine. I think, at best, he does it when he’s so fucking exhausted from studying that he can’t focus. 
Like, he’s studying one night. An itch makes itself known, but it’s easily suppressed. He smoothly focuses on his work. The itch rises again. He ignores it again. His leg begins to twitch. He ignores it even more. His leg starts bouncing without him realizing it. He presses a hand down on his knee, purposely avoiding touching his thighs, and attempts once again to focus on his work. The itch spreads, reaching from his groin to his legs, slowly crawling up his back. He still stifles it and forces his eyes to absorb the words on the paper of the book in front of him. The itch reaches his neck, creeping up his spine to his face. Suddenly, he’s flushed, and he realizes that, despite his best efforts, here he sits: half-hard, not absorbing the information in the book, his breathing heavy and his vision swimming. Damn! He allows himself the slightest freedom, knowing that will lead him to the gates of release whether he wants that or not. When he’s covered in his own sticky release a few minutes later, clarity hits him at last. He bites his lip and suppresses a groan as he stuffs himself back into his pants, shaking his head to rid himself of the cloudy orgasmic feeling. Finally, back to work. 
That being said, November is a cinch… unless this happens. 
Kaito Fuji: Fail
I don’t need to explain myself I think lol! Horniest virgin on the face of the earth. Yes, he fails, to thoughts of you, at that! I’m even willing to bet the one time he tries, he fails accidentally via wet dream. Sucker! It’s surprising, though… When he puts his mind to it, he really can keep his hands off himself… for less than a month. 
It’s late at night and he’s not studying, rather rolling around in his bed, back and forth, trying to resist the insistence of his cock, pressing into the mattress at full mast. He huffs face first into his pillow, feeling his cock strain against his underwear. He could stand this for a little longer. Just a little longer… November just started, sure, but if he beat his record of one week, that’d be accomplishment enough for him. He has to resist the urge to whine as he rolls over again, his cock pressing and pressing and pressing against all things within reach. He rips the covers off of him, frustrated, feeling warm from the heat of his arousal anyway. He could get through this, right? His fingers grip his shirt collar, bunching it into his fist. His other hand gripped his phone, as though using it to ground himself. He shifted the screen to his face. Maybe he’d be able to find something to take his mind off of things. He opens WickChat and scrolls, searching for a distraction. However, the gods must be against him, because all he can do is open his chat with you, and pretend you’d sent him nudes. He tosses his phone back onto his bed, clenching his hand into another fist before it could drift any further towards his groin. He bites furiously on his fingernails, burying his face into his pillows. His cock continued to beg for attention. 
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a/n: well, i hope u enjoyed! im so tired and i have work in 6 hours. goodnight lmfao!
note that i appreciate likes, comments, and reblogs!! im not open for reqs atm, but please feel free to just hop in 2 give little random thirsts or something, i don't mind!
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lunaandco · 2 days ago
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spit
pairing: pedri x ofc
social media au
summary: pedri and rue hard launch but her fans notice he might be the muse for her dirtiest lyrics
masterlist
@ pedri posted:
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rueful, feeeeerrr and 1.292.290 more liked
pedri: ni siquiera me miró dos veces la vez que nos conocimos <3
feeeeerrr: si le rompes el corazón me aseguraré de que la canción de ruptura acabe en el spotify wrapped
>pedri: hermano, cuanta confianza
>>rueful: lov u fer
user1: pedri pulling my favourite underground artist was not on my bingo card for 2024
>user2: share her name sis
>>user1: I'm gatekeeping her for as long as I can >:)
>>>user3: it's @ rueful
>>>>user2: thanks girlie
>>>>>user1: not cool
user4: nooo pedri I wanted to gatekeep her forever
>rueful: me too, babes, me too
user5: cool hair
user6: was anyone going to tell me pedri has a girlfriend or did I have to find out on my own?
@ rueful posted:
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pedri, gracemace and 23.383 more liked
rueful: he thinks he's special (he is)
pedri: esa foto no 😭
>rueful: the dangers of going public, there is more where that came from
>>feeeeerrr: I'd pay for more of those
>>>rueful: I take paypal
>>>>pedri: EY
user7: is this pedris girl?
>user8: looks like she is
>>user9: no one has ever heard of her before him. she's with him to promote herself
>>>user10: bruh
user11: still trying to wrap my head over this crossover 😭😭😭
>user12: thank god I found someone that was here before pedri 😭😭😭 I'm going insane with all this new people
>>user11: sometimes gatekeeping is good, actually
>>>user12: now the real question is, is pedri the guy from spit?
>>>>user11: fuck 😳😳😳
@ rueful posted:
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pedri, gracemace and 54.467 more liked
rueful: spit tour dump
pedri: barcelona was the best part
>gracemace: no <3
>>pedri: I thought you had already accepted me
>>>gracemace: trial period is never truly over
>>>>rueful: never beating the overprotective bestie allegations
user13: great, but I need to know if she was thinking about pedri when she wrote "spit in my mouth and ill swallow you whole/spit in my chest and ill eat you alive"
>user14: those lyrics live rent free on my mind 😳😳
>>user15: i mean... footballers love spitting on the pitch
gracemace: an amazing experience, hoping you'll let me be your background vocalist for the rest of my life.
>rueful: girl I can't live without you. I'm begging you to come with me on every tour.
>>gracemace: good 😈😈
user16: girl I need to know how she met pedri
user17: rue fang please never change
user18: her dirty lyrics are making me go through a second sexual awakening
>pedri: x2
>>user18: AYOOO
>>>user19: ariana what are you doing here
@ pedri posted:
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rueful, gracemace and 5.382.290 more liked
pedri: bd'or ceremony 2024
feeeeerrr: so proud of you, manito
>pedri: <3
user20: somebody tell bro it was him who got nominated, not his girlfriend
>user21: can't help but stan a simp
pablogavi: el año que viene es tuyo hermano
>pedri: JA
gracemace: how did I end up here
rueful: love u
>pedri: love u more
user22: still trying to figure out how they met
>user23: RIGHT? like it's such a random pairing
>>user24: the PR is PRing
@ rueful posted:
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pedri, gracemace and 102.573 more liked
user25: so she's finally writing about him?
rueful: new single '8' coming at soon ;)
>feeeeerrr: unfortunately she's being doing that for a couple of years now. yall don't understand how annoying it is for your favourite singer to write about your brother
>>user25: BRO???
>>>user26: SPIT?????
user27: omfg
pedri: and to think you couldn't look me in the face at first 😏😏
>rueful: I was embarrassed, okay?
>>feeeeerrr: and you didn't want to come to the concert cabron
>>>pedri: not my fault you only like artist with three monthly listeners on spoty
>>>>rueful: bro
>>>>>pedri: don't call me bro 🥺
gracemace: 8 seconds, 8 minutes, 8 days, 8 weeks, 8 months...
>rueful: shut it
>>pedri: 8 on the back of his shirt
>>>rueful: EY
user28: still think it's PR?
>user29: always has been
>>user30: idk, girlie, I wouldn't write a song about a dude I don't love
>>>user31: allegedly it's more than one
>>>>user32: spit 💀💀
user33: never recovering from the fact that spit was written about pedri. he looks too innocent for THAT
>user34: he's a footballer. he's anything but innocent
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stoshasaurus · 6 months ago
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right. I need to add some fucking context to this.
My current pfp in one of my discord servers is one of my recent drawings of Felwinter. I was talking about my desire to go out and get donuts this morning, particularly a banana Bismarck (basically a banana-flavored Boston cream donut, if you asked me to sum it up) from this local donut shop. I expressed that I enjoy having characters as my pfp because I imagine that they are saying my words, and it made me wonder how Felwinter would feel about donuts for breakfast, and banana bismarcks. I promised that once I had returned from my expedition to acquire said donuts, that I would write a short snippet about Felwinter eating a banana Bismarck.
So, here it is. An extremely silly, probably HIGHLY inaccurate mini-fic about Shaxx bringing Felwinter donuts for breakfast.
Disgustingly sweet (both literally and figuratively) Felshaxx fluff ahead.
Felwinter only finds himself sleeping in when he is visiting Shaxx. The Iron Lord never sleeps at all; he doesn’t need to, and there is always work to be done. He often finds himself quite busy in the evenings, scouring submind data or organizing lessons for his new student, activities that he obsesses over long after dusk, when any ordinary man would retire for the night. But endless work and looming threats be damned, Shaxx has an absurdly comfortable bed, with far too many pillows and a mattress so soft that Felwinter’s frame sinks immediately into it like a stone in a pond. He’d never known he needed a soft bed with a mountain of pillows. It has become one of the millions of little things he looks forward to when it comes to visiting his beloved in the Last Safe City of Humanity
His infrequent holiday stays in the City have been growing in length recently. In the past, he was lucky to have a single evening to himself to spend, a few scant hours spent being shown all of the spectacular things Shaxx detailed to him in his letters. Now, he is allotted more time, sometimes a week or more, once or twice a month. There was never any announcement made; Felwinter highly suspects that Radegast had been pestered into lessening the burdens of his duties by those few nosy Lords who had deciphered his unspoken relationship with Shaxx. Absolute wretches, all of them. He cannot complain.
He sleeps in more frequently now; Shaxx wakes earlier than him, often unable to step away from his post for longer than a few hours. But he never leaves without soft murmurs goodbye and a few kisses pressed to his face. Felspring teases him relentlessly when he finds himself brushing his hand over where Shaxx’s had been. He swats at her before dozing off for the next hour or so, Arc energy buzzing across his frame long after the Warlord has gone, soft flickers of static mimicking well-known, well-loved fingertips.
When he does finally wake up, it is to a still-empty house. If he makes a small noise of disappointment, he will never admit to it. He makes the bed, dresses himself, and opens the windows to let the sun and the air in, admiring the cityscape in the distance. It truly is as marvelous as Shaxx had made it out to be. A place where flowers bloom and birds sing, and Lightless people sleep without guns in their hands. Shaxx had entrusted Felwinter (and Felwinter alone. Oh, isn’t that a precious thought?) with a small, messy manuscript of hand-written poetry. Felwinter had smiled as Shaxx asked for his aid in revising it, hiding his apprehension in his hands as he wrung them, his feet as he shuffled them, his eyes as he averted them from his face. The very same manuscript lay on the kitchen counter, pockmarked with notes and bookmarks, the pages marked with fresh ink in the margins where Felwinter had endlessly praised Shaxx’s prose (in a much more legible script). Where words often failed the Iron Lord, his writing never did. He confessed his love through paragraphs of detailed interpretation and literary analysis. Poetry of his own.
Felwinter is in the process of writing more notes in the manuscript when Shaxx finally returns to the house. Felwinter turns to greet him– there is a tray of twin coffee cups in one hand and a small box cradled in the other, another bag tucked in his elbow.
Shaxx’s Ghost graciously removes the man’s helmet in time for him to press a kiss to his forehead. “Morning,” he rumbles as he deposits his goodies on the counter.
Felwinter absorbs the matching icons printed on the bag and the box. Some kind of bakery, evidently. He shuts the manuscript and sets it aside, taking one of the cups when Shaxx hands it to him. “Good morning,” he replies. “How goes the Crucible?”
“Astoundingly boring. I have no exciting clips to share.” The man sounds almost wounded. Felwinter curses whichever Guardian neglected to throw enough grenades to elicit excitement in the Crucible Handler. “The new Lights tend to try their luck during the summer months. I almost feel bad watching them get decimated by some of our veteran fireteams.”
“One would think the loss would motivate them to try harder.”
Shaxx laughs as he opens the box and examines its contents, out of Felwinter’s line of sight. “It does! That’s the thing about the newly Risen. They haven’t learned what quitting is yet.”
Felwinter does not protest when Shaxx plucks something out of the box and presses it insistently into his hand. It is a soft pastry, glazed with a sweet white frosting and sprinkled with what looks like chunks of cookies. Shaxx grabs an identical item out of the box, but his eyes are on Felwinter rather than the thing in his hand.
The Iron Lord puzzles over it, tilting it carefully so as not to spill the toppings, and stares at Shaxx. “What is this?”
“It’s a donut.” He shrugs with one shoulder. “It’s called a Bismarck. A banana Bismarck, to be exact.” He sounds overly proud of himself as he tilts his chin triumphantly. Felwinter huffs at the display.
Felspring hovers over his shoulder, studying the treat curiously. Felwinter wishes that she had a mouth so she could try it herself. In her stead, he slowly takes a bite, watching Shaxx mirror him with equal trepidation. He cranes his neck over the counter and cups his hand under the Bismarck, making sure no debris falls to the floor. The kitchen is flooded with an oddly pregnant silence as they chew thoughtfully in tandem with one another.
Felwinter signifies the end of his chewing and swallowing with “It’s good.”
“I concur,” Shaxx says. He is still chewing, and the words are muffled as he cleverly keeps his mouth as closed as possible. Crumbs speckle the corners of his lips. “Very sweet.”
“Obscenely,” he remarks. Shaxx barks a laugh.
Felwinter takes another bite. He feels like something, a loose screw, or a damaged cog, clicks back into place. He plucks a cookie off of the top of the thing and pops it into his mouth. It crunches loudly in the metal hollow of his mouth, and the sound drowns out every other thought in his head. Shaxx chuckles at him again, looking very strangely infatuated, and Felwinter cannot stop the lights that dot his chest and his neck from flickering in diffidence.
When his mouth dries up from consuming the pastry, Felwinter reaches for the coffee. It is strong, straight black just the way he likes it, and pleasantly hot rather than scalding. He drinks deeply and feels his plates thaw from the warmth of it, his mouth, his throat, his chest, and his stomach, each system absorbing it individually. The bitterness is a perfect complement to the sweetness of the Bismarck. Shaxx watches him overtly, an earnest tenderness visible in his eyes, unhurried anticipation visible in his open posture. Silently, he seeks appraisal.
“It’s very good,” Felwinter murmurs. All of the words he knows feel inadequate to describe his feelings, so he resorts to simplicity instead. “Thank you.”
Shaxx physically sags against the counter with what Felwinter assumes is relief. An uncharacteristically bashful grin pulls at the corners of his mouth. “I’m glad. I wasn’t sure you’d like it.”
The Exo’s eyes sparkle with his version of a coy smile. “Do I not strike you as the type to enjoy banana-flavored sweets, Lord Shaxx?”
“No, Fel. Not at all.”
As if to prove him wrong, he takes another bite of the Bismarck. It is so sickeningly sweet that he is afraid it will somehow rot his metal mouth.
——
Playing Nice has ruined my fucking life. I’m so sorry.
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fellamarsh · 29 days ago
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another thing i've been trying to do recently is read more self-published stuff. "but fell," you say, "you're a self-published author. surely you've been reading self-published stuff all along" and then i laugh for so long in response we both become uncomfortable.
see, the fear (which has for a long time been killing my mind) that i'll read other self-published stuff and find out that it's so much better than mine that i might as well stop writing forever kept me from doing that basically ever. i have a hard time not unfavorably comparing my work to others and had convinced myself i was being smart by withholding an avenue of de-motivation (reader: i was not being smart). it also doesn't help that i'm pretty low income and have a hard time spending money on books i haven't already read, and that self-published stuff isn't always available at the library---but really a lot of it was just me being a coward. which i'm working on. i could talk about how this particular cowardice is Very Silly, but i think enough has been said about it on writeblr and in the Writing Space in general that i don't feel the need to (though i will if anyone wants me to).
instead, i wanna talk about the self-published things i have read in the past few months and ask about the self-published things you love!
so: what happened was i got real sick, and while i was real sick i (naturally) read over 200,000 words of ace attorney fan fiction in the span of a few days. eventually i got bored of it (and also maybe annoyed at how people were characterizing some of my guys), but i still wanted to read something gay and romantic and nice, something i knew was gonna end happily, which isn't my typical fare.
now you may be saying (having gotten over all the uncomfortable laughter from earlier) "fell, you write gay romance. what do you mean that's not your typical fare?" listen. until a couple months ago i hadn't read a cut and dry romance novel since before i finished college. for context: i graduated in 2015. i know it doesn't make sense. i'm a guy who doesn't make sense.
but in this case it worked to my advantage. not the not making sense thing, but the not having read Published Romance in 1000 years thing. I didn't know where to start. I was very skeptical of everything the library had Available Now in the Gay Fantasy Romance category. what if it was all bad and also not good?
and then i scrolled past the familiar cover of our very own @ashen-crest's A Rival Most Vial.
now this was comfortable territory! this was a novel by a very nice writeblr person whose posts i enjoy! i already loosely knew the plot, i was familiar with the characters, i knew the names of things like rosemond street and the griffin's claw and that ambrose had blue hair and that at the end of it all there would definitely be Boyfriends. i didn't have to worry that this would be bad! i only had to worry that it would be really good!
but i wasn't worried about that, because i was officially Not Writing at the time, and because why the hell hadn't i read this book yet Ash literally emailed me some very kind words last year when my cat died??
Y'all, I devoured ARMV. If you haven't read it yet---especially if cozy fantasy is more your thing than it is mine---you should check it out Immediately. It was fun! It was heartwarming! It was sweet and earnest and confident! I was delighted to find it was occasionally hot! Ambrose and Eli snuggled up into my sick exhausted heart and found a permanent little place there. (Especially Ambrose. I have such a thing for Stiff Guys who Kind of Suck for Tragic Backstory Reasons and are So So Lonely They Don't Even Realize It. gawd)
(And a very small part of my brain spent the whole time wondering why I had been so afraid to really engage with the work my community is doing. The community that I'm in. The one I'm a part of. Why?! Maybe more on that later.)
But from there the curse was broken! I immediately devoured @stjohnstarling's What Manner of Man in a similar sort of frenzy (and hooooly shit guys am I excited for the expanded, finalized version to come out at the end of next month!) and started digging into @lurinatftbn's The Flower that Bloomed Nowhere (which I can already tell is going to be an All Time Favorite).
And now I want to ask you what your favorite self-published books are so that I can read them, too, but I think I will in another post that doesn't dedicate so much space to talking about my various and sundry Issues and isn't Terminally Long
#my god the library. darling. beloved. breath of my life and heart of my soul.#i should make a post about her#also. and maybe i'll make a separate post about this at some point too#but i truly think the free serialized webnovel rough draft ala What Manner of Man is The Future#i should probably make a whole separate post about all these novels too tbh.#boutta become Posting Guy. The Guy Who Posts#and writes novels in the tags. but i've always been like that#i never talked about the dream i had where i was emry karic from the lutesong series did i? i totally meant to. fucked up!#so i had a dream where i was emry karic.#I (emry karic) was fleeing a bunch of elves in a forest with my mom and sister (who were fully my irl mom and sister)#they thought i had done a murder and were chasing me (emry karic) with spears and stuff. they almost caught me#but i managed to escape. later i came upon a weird old-timey fantasy carnival.#and for some reason one of the fun attractions at this carnival was A Day in Court#where you watch someone defend themselves in court.#you'll never guess who had to defend himself in court and what the charges were!#notably there were no other characters from the lutesong series involved.#and i also have yet to read any of the books in the lutesong series. emry and his flower crown simply invaded my brain out of nowhere#i thought about turning this post into separate posts or rewriting it or smthn because it's so long and all over the place but#that sort of defeats the whole trying to just post and not be so up my own ass about it that i never actually post thing#so here you go#if you are also someone who struggles or once struggled with reading other people's stuff because of self esteem issues. hi!#we're now spidermen pointing at each other
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gncrezan · 9 months ago
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IFs (especially IFs on tumblr!) are very fun because there's a lot of creator-fan interaction possible because of tumblr's ask function. you get to ask questions about your favorites, suggest ideas and sometimes those ideas are even taken on board. fans get much more content because the writers and creators are so accessible. and i feel like asking questions and leaving comments in this way has become so common and standard with IFs that people are forgetting that's a real person writing these stories. just because you can send the ask doesn't mean you should. DON'T BE RUDE ON ANONYMOUS!!!!! DON'T BE WEIRD ON ANONYMOUS!!!!! my jaw drops reading some of these asks so i can't imagine how it's like for the authors
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sejanusarchive · 14 hours ago
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Alright, took a break from Tumblr but I’m back and the amount of drafts I have accumulated is getting ridiculous. Would it be super annoying if I posted a bunch of them? It wouldn’t be well thought out stuff, and some of them are very unserious as well
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minweber · 11 months ago
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Belisarius Cawl, hiding for his life, his ass kicked, ship crashing, friends in mortal peril: I am such a smart boy, he-he-he =)
#I love him so much your honor#warhammer 40000#adeptus mechanicus#belisarius cawl#genefather#guy haley#cawlposting#(kinda going to finish my thoughts on the book here since I ran out of space on the last post)#but a huge HUGE part of what I loved about this book were all the fun relationships and dynamics that it had set up#I literally want to see all of those characters again#Cawl and AsanethAyu? Absolutely. Not necessarily in a shipp-y way (Unless?) But god do I love seeing necrons bicker apparently#Cawl and Bile? Do my eyes deceive me or did Haley actually pull off 'we are not so different you and I' thing in a genuinely interesting wa#Cawl and Primus? What can I fucking say?!#Guy Haley should be awarded a prize for bringing back emotion and weight into what is surely one of the top 5 most overused words in 40k#Cawl and Qvo? Never before have I so thoroughly understood shippers of something that I don't personally ship.#I (barely) write a different type of fanfiction but somewhere in here there is a potential for the most wonderfully fucked up family#Primus and Porter? They did not talk but parallels between them were set up SO hard. This one is definitely not shippy for me#just so fucking charged with storytelling potential#All the minor guys? X99 whom I now love dearly? Oswen who was set up to be the traitor so hard and then just sort of wasn't? (Unless?!)#Skitarii Marshal named Iota?! Maybe later on that one#and that is to say absolutely nothing about the MASSIVE (eh? get it?) set up for the next big Cawl thing?#god so many threads to follow up on#Guy Haley you owe me like at least three follow-up books
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imogenkol · 11 months ago
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Old Scars and New
word count: 3.3k warnings: blood, injury tending, disaster bisexual werewolf being cringe af tags: bandaging/stitching up wounds prompt
this is a slightly altered/updated version of my most popular piece of writing for this verse and thought I'd share it in my continued journey of rebuilding my relationship with my og works!
“Alright, who’s up first?” Nadya announced once everyone filed into the motel room.
Skye flashed a sly grin at the sight of Nadya putting her glasses on. “Ooh, are we gonna play doctor?”  
Jayde rolled her eyes and dumped her bag onto the floor, barely holding back a wince. The scent of her own blood invaded her lungs and she already felt bruises forming, but the aches and pains were far from uncommon occurrences. She dismissed any concern. “I’m fine.” 
Nadya ignored their comments and pointed at both of the siblings. “You two. Sit.”
“Are you going to tell me to roll over too?” Skye remarked. 
At the same time, Jayde reiterated grumpily “I said I’m fine.”
The human threw them a stern glare. Nadya may appear soft and approachable most of the time – even meek to those who underestimated her – but the wolves quickly discovered that she had a hidden talent for intimidation when she wanted to. Jayde and Skye simultaneously took their seats at the edge of one of the beds without further protest. 
Satisfied with their obedience, Nadya turned to Toby. “How are you feeling?” 
“Right as rain,” he replied.
She made a spin motion with her hand. “Twirl.” He held up his arms and turned in one slow circle, showing her that he was unscathed. “Nothing’s hurting?”
“Nope.”
She concluded her thorough scan with a pat on his shoulder. “Okay, you’re good.” 
Toby gave the sisters a childish smirk like he won a game and said “Ha.” Then sauntered over to a chair. 
Well, if the game went to whoever got hurt the least, then Jayde would never win. She almost scoffed at herself because the competitive side of her that came out around Toby hated the fact that she’d lose anything to him. She even made a mental note to be more careful the next time they encountered hunters just so that she could rub her success in his face. Maybe that was his real motive – to try a tactic that would work on a toddler simply to get the reckless blonde to take better care of herself. Jayde wouldn’t put it past him. 
Nadya addressed Skye next. “You got hit on the head pretty hard. How are you feeling?”
The young wolf widened her eyes. “I can see new colors now.”
Nadya laughed and fished out a small flashlight from her bag. “How about dizziness or nausea?”
Jayde watched on as Nadya carefully combed her fingers through Skye’s hair in search of any damage hidden in the light blonde waves. Skye kicked her feet like a little kid getting a check-up, but Jayde noted how her crooked smile evened out to something more… genuine. 
Skye was rarely ever anything but mischievous, as if life were just one big joke to her. Of course, there were precious few moments when her serious self would shine through, where there were no jokes to be made and she acted fairly mellow, much to her older sister’s relief. Jayde was shocked to see that happen more often when she interacted with Nadya. 
“I feel fine,” Skye answered, then flinched when Nadya touched the sore spot on her head. “Ow! But that hurts.” 
“Sorry.” Nadya winced apologetically. “I don’t see any blood, at least.” 
The tip of her finger tapped under Skye’s chin to get her to look up. It was then that Jayde noticed she had been chewing on the inside of her cheek. Skye went still as Nadya shined the light in her eyes. It felt like an eternity to Jayde. To see Nadya be so close to her sister, touching her in ways that Jayde longed for. The older wolf realized – with a hot flush to her cheeks – that she was jealous of Skye. That made her bite her cheek even harder as she forced herself to look down. 
Nadya stepped away, allowing Jayde to finally breathe normally again. “You don’t have a concussion, but I suggest you ice that for tonight.” 
“Sounds good, doc,” she replied with a wink. 
Just when Jayde thought she might get over the momentary lapse in her emotions, Nadya blushed. It was subtle enough that she might have been able to convince herself that she imagined it, but her thoughts took what she saw regardless of rationality and ran. 
The possibility had never occurred to her until that moment, but Jayde started to wonder if maybe Skye had feelings for the human, too. Jayde certainly couldn’t blame her if she did. It was Nadya, after all. This girl practically had Jayde wrapped around her finger the first day they met. The thing that ate at Jayde more than that were Nadya’s reactions to Skye. She wouldn’t have that hard of a time believing she also felt something for her. Her sister – in all of her annoying glory – was just as much of a catch. 
The concept felt nearly unbearable to consider, but Jayde knew that she would never stand in the way of her sister’s happiness or Nadya’s. Especially if it meant Nadya would get to be with someone far more worthy of her affections. Deep down, Jayde has been looking for a good, rock solid excuse to let her go. This possible outcome might be the easiest to accept. That didn’t mean it wasn’t exceptionally painful. 
Wallowing in a pit of her own creation caused Jayde to tune the rest of the world out until Nadya’s voice brought her back down to earth. 
“Crap, I grabbed the wrong kit,” she grumbled as she sifted through her bag.
Skye gasped dramatically. “Language.” 
“You’re right, I’m sorry,” Nadya said with an amused scoff and backed up towards the door. “I’m gonna go back to the car. I’ll pick up some ice for your head on the way back, too.” 
“Toby,” Jayde commanded with a purposeful glance. Despite being clear of immediate danger, she didn’t want anyone going anywhere by themselves. Not even to the parking lot. 
He nodded in understanding and got up. “Yeah, I’ll go with her.”  
Before they left, Nadya locked eyes with Jayde. For that single second, all of her worries were utterly nonexistent. “We’ll be back in a few minutes. Try not to get into any more trouble.” 
“No promises,” Skye replied. Jayde looked to see that the devious smirk had returned to her face. 
The siblings remained seated on the musty motel bed once Toby and Nadya disappeared. The comforter felt scratchy, but Jayde still balled her fists into the fabric and stared at the worn carpet underneath her blood splattered boots. Something metallic tickled the edge of her tongue and she sighed at the sting that shortly followed, releasing her flesh from her own vengeful teeth. 
“So, what crawled up your ass?” Skye asked to break the awkward silence. 
Jayde gave her a brief side-glance. “Nothing.” 
“Right.” Her words already dripped with sarcasm. “You’re just acting like you have to take Old Yeller out back for no reason.” 
Jayde felt a brief spark boil in her chest, but it died out as quickly as it came. She didn’t have the will to be angry or defensive. She only sighed again and forced her question out. “Do you like her?”
There was no hesitation in Skye’s answer. “Yeah, of course I like her.”
“No, I mean… Do you like her?"
Confusion twisted the younger wolf’s features as she blinked at Jayde for several moments. Jayde wordlessly begged not to make her spell it out. The question alone was already mortifying enough. As soon as her meaning fully sank in, Skye’s expression promptly turned incredulous. 
“Forget it,” Jayde said curtly.
But Skye already jumped on it. “No, you know what? I do like her. I really, really like her. Yeah, I want her to have my babies.” 
Jayde had to fight the urge to growl. “It was a genuine question, Skye.” 
“And you’re a genuine idiot,” she fired back with no remorse. “I don’t want your girlfriend, Jayde.” 
“She’s not my girlfriend.” 
“She could be.”
“She shouldn’t.” 
Skye raised an eyebrow. “That’s not very progressive of you. You’re sounding like Miranda with that old world bullshit. Who cares if Nadya is a human? Just be careful not to break or bite her. That simple.” 
Jayde shook her head. “It’s not that…” 
The slow nod she saw out of the corner of her eye turned into a shrug as Skye leaned into her. “What if you’re wrong about yourself?” she whispered like a kid telling a secret. 
They fell back into another prolonged silence as Jayde rocked back and forth anxiously. She wasn’t wrong about herself, but Jayde somehow still had the smallest bit of hope that she could become someone Nadya deserves. That if she tried to be better, she wouldn’t fight this so hard or put herself through all of this pain. She had it in her. Somewhere. Buried underneath dirt and dust. The best version would peek through the cracks of everything broken about her whenever that girl was near. Jayde just had to figure out a way to widen the fractures and reach through. 
But she worried she would break herself even more by doing that. 
After a minute, her lungs deflated once more in utter hopelessness. “I am an idiot.” 
Familiar footsteps approached the room and Skye nudged her older sister with her elbow. “Chin up, sport.” 
Jayde managed to give her a grateful look just as the others returned. Nadya held a small bag of ice in one hand and a different first aid kit in the other. She went to Skye first and handed her the ice for her head. 
Guilt immediately flooded Jayde’s system for feeling so jealous. Nadya put in so much effort to take care of them all and Jayde had been worried that she wanted her sister over her. She needed to get over herself. 
“Okay, you’re good to go. Just take it easy,” Nadya ordered. 
Skye enthusiastically jumped to her feet while balancing the ice pack on top of her head. “Great, I’m gonna go get tacos across the street.” 
“Don’t go alone,” Jayde called as she skipped towards the door.
She waved dismissively. “Yeah, yeah, buddy system.” 
“You guys want anything?” Toby asked before he trailed after her.
“Just get me whatever you get,” Jayde said.
“Okay. Nadya?”
Nadya sounded slightly distracted as she prepared the kit. “Uh, what kinds are there?” 
“Asada, pollo, carnitas.” When she took too long to ponder the options, he translated in a patronizing tone “Beef, chicken, pork.” 
She looked up and fixed him with an exasperated stare. “I know what they mean, I was just thinking.” 
Toby chuckled. “Any day now.” 
“Get me chicken.” 
He gave a casual thumbs up. “You got it.” 
The motel room grew quiet again once it became only the two young women. The wolf took time to let the human’s presence calm the restless being within. She focused on how her air of crisp autumn spices encompassed her senses, even over the scents of the others. What fascinated Jayde was how her existence always broke through the most powerful things. Werewolves had an incredibly distinct and potent scent, so being around her pack should have masked the humanness of Nadya’s scent. But it didn’t. In fact, Jayde often sensed her before she sensed anything or anyone else. It was always her first. 
“Your turn?” Nadya suggested softly, immediately drawing Jayde’s full attention. 
Up to that point, she had completely forgotten about her injuries. “Oh, right.” 
Nadya came directly to her, standing just inches away. Jayde stared up at her and waited, totally transfixed. “Let’s get a look at that arm.” 
Jayde realized she needed to remove her jacket. She snapped herself out of her trance and carefully slipped out of it, grimacing as the fabric tugged at the graze on her bicep. Blood had mostly soaked into the jacket itself, but streaks of crimson still smeared across her skin and reached as low as her wrist.
Nadya bent down and adjusted her glasses to get a better look, but that furrow in her brow looked like it took too much effort. “Do you think we could move to the bathroom? The lighting sucks out here and I gotta get you cleaned up.” 
“Yeah.” 
Nadya followed closely behind as they entered the bathroom, but lingered over Jayde’s shoulder after turning the light on. “Hey, did you take a hit to the back?” 
Jayde craned her neck to see why she looked so concerned, but couldn’t see much of anything. The strain of twisting only made her injured shoulder spike with pain. “Um, I’m not sure. Maybe? I remember getting punched or something.” 
“There’s blood, Jay,” Nadya informed her, still inspecting the wound. “Take this off.” 
Jayde felt her entire body flare with intense heat as Nadya tugged at her shirt. She hesitated for a few beats to let the embarrassment pass. It wasn’t like Nadya hadn't seen her without a shirt on before. Hell, she’s seen her naked. She’s seen her turn into a goddamn werewolf, for fuck’s sake. Jayde wanted to curse at herself for being so stupid. 
She struggled to get out of the shirt on her own. It was enough that her shoulder felt as sore as it did, but now that she had been made aware of it, the wound on Jayde’s back stung like a bitch. As much as she wanted to hide her pain, she wasn’t able to stop herself from flinching when she tried to work one of her arms out of the ruined clothing. 
“Here, let me –” Nadya reached to help, but then her pulse spiked in the wolf’s ears like a drum had been struck and she stopped short. “Can I..?”
“Sure, yeah,” Jayde stammered and braced herself as the human stepped into her space. 
Nadya’s hands carefully gripped the bottom of the bloodied shirt and slowly pushed it up her torso. Jayde could tell that she tried not to, but there were still a couple of times where her fingers brushed up against bare skin. Jayde clenched her jaw tightly. Just those small, brief touches caused intense tingling to spread outwards from the places of contact. She shut her eyes and held her breath as her wolf fought to rise to the surface. A shiver raced along Jayde’s spine as she quickly dampened it. After a tense half-second, she felt the restless animal reluctantly retreat. 
Despite nearly losing control, Jayde didn’t feel afraid. Maybe because she knew Nadya wasn’t in any danger. The wolf only wanted a glimpse of her, but the last thing Jayde wanted was to cause any potential fear. She certainly didn’t want to think up some shitty excuse to explain why her eyes started to glow. 
The two of them successfully got the shirt over Jayde’s head with minimal pain and discarded it on the floor. Meeting Nadya’s gaze after that felt far braver than facing any hunter. She had this look in her warm brown eyes that Jayde couldn’t quite decipher. However, the physical effect in Nadya’s body was more obvious. Being so close, Jayde sensed it all. 
An erratic heartbeat. A clipped breath caught in her throat. A blooming scent that tempted Jayde nearer. 
Those were not things she noticed in Nadya with anyone else, Jayde realized. 
“I’m going to, uh…” Nadya motioned awkwardly, finally just shuffling behind her again. 
Jayde cleared her throat to banish her own nerves and brushed her tangled hair over her shoulder. “How’s it looking back there?” 
“This is pretty deep,” she murmured and began to clean it. “You really didn’t feel this?”
Jayde tensed at the incredibly cold sensation of a disinfectant wipe against her hot skin, but she still gave a half shrug. “I remember being hit, but that’s all.” 
“Well, you got lucky. It could have punctured your lung.”
Jayde set her hands on the edge of the sink and watched Nadya’s reflection carefully through the mirror. “Yeah, I feel lucky.” 
“That better not be sarcasm. Not when I’m looking at all these scars.” Nadya scolded as she got the stitches ready. “It looks like you should be dead ten times over.” 
“It’s because I should be.” 
They briefly shared a look. Nadya’s expression remained unreadable. Not that Jayde had the time to properly study it before she went back to work. 
She didn’t say anything while she made a few sutures — being too focused on her task of mending a werewolf — but then Jayde saw her brown eyes peek over her shoulder again. “I’m really glad you aren’t, by the way.” 
Jayde exhaled an almost whispered response. “Me too.”  
A bandage was carefully placed over the newly stitched wound, but Nadya lingered behind her. Jayde wondered if maybe she had spotted another wound that hadn’t quite traveled through her nerves and up to her brain yet, but then felt an incredibly delicate sensation tickle her lower back. It took a moment for her to realize that it was the tip of Nadya’s finger trailing over what had to be one of her scars. Jayde froze in place, not having a single clue how to react. 
“How many are there?” Nadya’s voice sounded distant. 
Jayde gripped the edges of the sink so that she wouldn’t fall over as the girl traced another sensitive mark. She was afraid that the slightest movement would cause her to stop. “I’ve never counted.” 
A soft hum echoed in the bathroom. “I guess you’ve got a couple more now. Which reminds me…” Nadya pulled her hand away, but before disappointment twisted an invisible knife in the werewolf’s chest, her palm rested on her hip and turned her around. 
The human’s sudden willingness to touch her in ways that could be considered intimate left Jayde’s mind in a utter stupor, stirring her inner self once more. She didn’t know what to make of it. Or what to do. She knew what she wanted to do, though that remained a line Jayde felt she shouldn’t cross. 
Nadya went to work on the laceration that cut through her upper arm and Jayde found herself thoroughly fascinated with the process. The human’s eyes were so focused, making sure each and every stitch was up to her standard. The way her brows knitted in concentration — the thin frame of her glasses resting on the bridge of her nose — replaced Jayde’s heart with a pair of fluttering wings. She could stare at her for hours. 
Nadya finally glanced up while she wrapped her arm. This time, her blush was entirely noticeable. “What?” 
The question made Jayde realize she had been smiling. She quickly looked away, though she couldn’t fully wipe the expression from her face. “Nothing.” 
“Okay,” Nadya said slowly, confused amusement written on her face. “Well, I’m all done.” 
Jayde nodded as she cleaned the mess up. As soon as the kit was packed, Nadya gave the wolf an unsure look and turned to leave the bathroom. On impulse, Jayde caught her wrist to stop her. A small gasp escaped Nadya’s lips at the unexpected touch, but she still waited expectantly. 
“Thank you.” Jayde caressed the smooth curve of her wrist with her thumb. For the first time, she didn’t try to hide it. She wanted Nadya to feel her gratitude. “For taking care of us.” 
Nadya’s features softened into an absolutely stunning smile. “I like taking care of you.” 
It took everything Jayde had not to pull her in. She yearned to feel Nadya against her. Longed to brush their lips together. To hold her close and swallow every breath. Feel all the ways she could get her heart to race. Instead, Jayde’s fingers went slack and Nadya slipped out of her grasp, leaving her alone in the bathroom with the ghost of her contact still prickling across the surface of her skin.
tag list (ask to be added or removed!): @adelaidedrubman @florbelles @marivenah @simonxriley @shegetsburned @voidika @kyber-infinitygems @statichvm @inafieldofdaisies @socially-awkward-skeleton @aceghosts @jillvalentinesday @risingsh0t @unholymilf @thedeadthree @cassietrn @jackiesarch
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buff-muffin · 1 year ago
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So guess who’s making an outfit for the fnaf movie and living their twelve year old self’s dream :)
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nerdyqueerr · 5 months ago
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THE DAYBREAK AO3 TAG IS ALMOST EXCLUSIVELY ELI/JOSH LEAVE THOSE BOYS THE FUCK ALONE
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the-casbah-way · 4 hours ago
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i HATE you kamala harris i HATE you donald trump i HATE you liberals i HATE you republicans i HATE you america. god bless
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cockyroaches · 1 year ago
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Hey man I heard Futurama is back and my wives are not being tormented by horrible writing this time so I drew this to celebrate. There will be more
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uitzinnigmp3 · 5 months ago
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monty-glasses-roxy · 3 months ago
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Okay so that AU based on Plex History stuff and the song the Horse and the Infant from Epic the Musical?
It's a medieval fantasy style AU, with magic, gods, kingdoms, and fucked monarchies. Bonnie is the prince of a kingdom who becomes friends with Roxy, a wolf from a northern town in the middle of nowhere. He and his father are considered very close to the gods and have been visited and guided by them many a time before. Meanwhile, Roxy was found nearly dead on a riverbank when she was a very small puppy and was adopted by Music Man. She was raised like her siblings (the Minis) by Music Man and the local community, is the best horse racer in the Northern regions and has nothing to do with the known gods ever outside of her regular education.
They meet at Roxy's first horse race in the South that just so happens to be in Bonnie's kingdom and the one he's also competing in. While all the other competitors recognise Bonnie either by name or face, Roxy doesn't have a god damn clue who this guy is and that throws Bonnie so off guard that they end up being friends.
However, since winning the race, Roxy has started to be visited in her dreams by a green, rabbit-looking god. He tells her very little she understands and honestly she doesn't care about this guy at all or what this "destiny" bullshit he keeps going on about is. Bonnie on the other hand, is receiving a few vague warnings not to trust his new friend, but don't exactly tell him why so he's not really sure what to make of it. But... well his father has been acting a bit weird lately... like he's afraid of something, almost seeming paranoid about some sort of attack on the kingdom... Weird...
So anyway, he hangs out with Roxy some more! I'm not sure how to approach the next part of the plot as there's a lot of options here, but basically, he goes on a trip with Roxy and their mutual friends to a kingdom his father defeated when he was little. They also find out what kind of atrocities he and his men committed there and what the fuck that has to do with Roxy, which, if you know the song I'm talking about you can probably make a pretty good guess where I'm going with this. Oh and also the place is crazy haunted and the ghosts all have it out for Bonnie specifically.
For those that don't know the song, the gods (Glitchtrap/Afton/Whoever) pressured and manipulated Bonnie's father into killing the baby of the royals he'd just killed in war. Except in this case, they didn't check the baby puppy was actually fucking dead before they moved on and forgot about her... until she showed up again in the kingdom they like fucking with the most. And makes friends with her would-be murderer's son with seemingly absolutely no knowledge of any of this shit.
But uhhh yeah this is basically a story about gods playing dolls with mortals and the consequences that has on them. And Old Man Consequences is there. He gets to be very cool here.
#he's over there laughing his god damn ass off as roxy flips glitchgod off for the third time this week#it's what he deserves I think#anyway! this is the AU cooking in my brain right now! almost everyone is in this in some way shape or form and it's very fun!#fnaf security breach#also this was a bitch to write summary posts of your own AUs are a pain in the ass to make#the thing with the song is that he's literally begging the gods not to make him kill this baby#and he's trying to come up with ways to avoid his fate of dying by their hand when he says he'll make sure his past is never known#the gods then respond with 'the gods will make it known' which literally just tells him they're creating this entire situation#like yeah sure you're REALLY looking out for the king here by making him kill this kid and saying if he lets the kid live then you'll just-#make sure they kill him. yeah that seems reasonable.#and yes this is based on some plex history stuff that I can elaborate on if so desired. same with this au honestly#it's a fun one for sure I love it#the king is like 'i need to finish the job' while simultaneously being so offended by Roxy's mere existence in the first place#just doesn't do what he expects her to do with her idea of revenge being different to his and he's just#so fucking offended#what do you MEAN he's not WORTH it??? He's the KING????? exCUSE me?!!#this is highly entertaining to roxy btw. comes at her with murderous intent and she's just like 'lmao you wanna kill me soooo bad'#'you wanna kill me soooo bad it makes you look stupid'#and she's RIGHT he KNOWS he looks stupid but god DAMN it#anyway that's enough tag spamming here is your explanation of that AU okay post over#I need a name for this au though hmmm#consequence of the gods au#hows that? seems pretty dramatic ngl but it'll do for now
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