#I made a fan oc and everything that’s how you know you’re fucked

[renardsruses]

Me when Trigun

[boobabietch]

Chapter I: "From College Phenom to WNBA Superstar: The Victoria O’Hara Story" | Diana Taurasi x OC

Warnings: Kinda narcissistic, kinda obsessed Victoria (excuse my girl she just wants to do good)

A/N: first chapter baby let’s fucking goooo, I’m so so excited about this series and I cannot wait for you guys to read it. As always English is not my first language so if you see any mistakes (I wrote this super high so there’s probably some) please let me know so I can change them asap, comments are highly appreciated, please let me know what you think! My ask box is always open too. Love Sof :))

Making headlines masterlist

There’s a funny thing about being a woman in sports, and it’s that being good is not enough.

When I was first drafted to the W, my back was in agonizing pain, breaking under the weight of everyone’s expectations. Having an excellent college career made the country ache with the need to see me play with the big dogs, some rooting for my success, but most of them patiently waiting for my imminent downfall. I struggled; climbing up that fucking hill was hard. But everything became easier once my mind was blinded with rage, and that anger had a name: Diana motherfucking Taurasi.

Growing up she was everything I aspired to be. She made it all look so easy, so effortless, and I wanted that. And the thing is, I’m not an aggressive person, not even a bad one. I bake for my teammates every Friday, I have friends all over the league, little girls want my shoes after the games and their grown fathers want my ass, teenage girls even write about me on Tumblr, for fuck's sake! I am perfectly fine!

Until that fucking game.

May 19, 2017

My rookie season. We faced Phoenix for the first time. The air was thick with anticipation, and I couldn’t shake the feeling in my gut that nobody on that arena came to see me.

There she was.

Diana was there, larger than life, owning the court like she owned the entire damn league. And the truth was, she did.

I knew this moment was coming, but nothing could’ve prepared me for actually standing across from her. She locked eyes with me during warm-ups, her face impassive, like I wasn’t even worth her time. I looked around and every person was the same, nobody really came to see me, not even my team. That’s when I realized that being good at the game it’s not enough, you have to play another type of game if you want people to see you, and I was determined to make them beg for more of me.

That was all it took. I felt something rise inside of me, a mix of insecurity and pure terror, and from that moment, the only thing I wanted more than winning was beating her. Proving her wrong.

And that’s where all the shit unraveled.

It wasn’t just the basketball. It was personal. Every shot I took, every time I drove the lane, I wasn’t just thinking about the score, I was thinking about her. The way she moved. How her voice echoed through the arena when she barked orders to her team. I hated how much I was drawn to it, to her.

My teammates tried to talk me down, “Vico, chill you’re obsessing,” Sydney said. But they didn’t get it. Diana Taurasi was my benchmark, my North Star. My fire, I wanted what she had and in order to get it she was the one to beat. Every game after that I took it as duel, a fight for dominance. I was determined to make her see me, to make her acknowledge that I wasn’t just some rookie passing through, because if she knew that, then everybody would know that I was Victoria fucking O’Hara, and I was coming for the crown, her crown.

And I was doing a hell of a job:

"Rising Star: Victoria O'Hara Leads All Rookies in Scoring and Rebounds"

"WNBA newest princess? O’Hara’s Rookie Season Proves She’s a Force to Be Reckoned With"

"Victoria O’Hara Makes Waves: Record-Breaking Rookie Season Captivates Fans and Analysts"

But it never seemed to be enough, until…

July 7, 2017

It was after another grueling game. We lost by three points, but I played the game of my life. I was exhausted, mentally and physically, slumped on the bench, trying to catch my breath. And someone towered over me.

Someone I was very aware of.

“Not bad, O’Hara. Keep it up, and you might actually be a challenge someday.”

My stomach twisted.

I stared at her for a weirdly amount of time, unsure how to respond. Hell, was she mocking me? Or was this some twisted form of respect?

Before I could think too much, I snapped back:

“Someday? I’m already a problem for you.”

Fuck, that sounded way harsher than I intended.

I saw her look at her shoes, clicking her tongue before staring at me again, a smirk plastered in her face begging to be slapped it out “Of course you are”

And that’s it. She left.

July 30, 2017:

We were playing again, and the tension was unbearable. Everyone could feel it. Diana was all over the place, controlling the game like she always did, like she owned it. But this time? I wasn’t letting her have it. I wasn’t going to give her the satisfaction of thinking she still ran the show. I needed this moment. I needed to prove myself. To her. To everyone.

Then, in the third quarter, it happened.

I saw her coming. Her eyes were locked on me like a damn predator, and I wasn’t backing down. I made a drive, quick and sharp, cutting to the basket with everything I had. I was going to score, but she had other plans. She slammed into me, body on body, knocking me off my path like I was nothing. I hit the floor hard, my elbows burning from the impact. The whistle blew, and I stayed down for a second, rage boiling under my skin.

"Get up," she muttered, standing over me like she owned the place. "You’re gonna need more than that to take me down, rook."

The audacity. I pushed myself up, heart pounding in my chest, glaring straight at her. I was chest to chest with the legend, staring into her eyes, and for the first time, I wasn’t intimidated. I was pissed. “You think you’re untouchable? Just fucking wait.”

She smirked, like she’d heard it all before. Like she didn’t even have to try. "I don’t think, O’Hara. I know," she spat back, her voice dripping with arrogance.

That was it. That was the moment I snapped. "Oh, you’re just a fucking bitch, aren’t you?" The words flew out before I could stop them, and I shoved her, hard.

The arena erupted in chaos.

Before I knew it, she was lunging at me, ready to push me back. But our teammates were faster, grabbing us before we could even make contact. I could feel my heart pounding in my ears, my fists clenched, ready to throw. But the second I tried to break free, I was held back by a wall of arms pulling me away from her.

It took four players to hold me back. Four.

Diana wasn’t any better off. Her teammates were holding her down too, but I could see it in her eyes. She wanted this fight as much as I did. There was fire there, the same fire I felt burning inside me. She wasn’t just here to win; she was here to prove a point. But so was I.

We both struggled against the hands holding us back, trying to break free, trying to get at each other. My muscles ached with the effort of pushing forward, but no matter how hard I fought, it wasn’t happening. I could almost feel the impact of my fist hitting her. The unfinished fight burned inside me, an itch that couldn’t be scratched.

I didn’t give a shit about the cameras or the refs. I didn’t care about the technical they were about to call. All I cared about was making her feel this rage, this fire that she had sparked inside me. I wanted her to know that she wasn’t untouchable. That I wasn’t just another rookie.

Finally, the refs managed to pull us apart, forcing us to opposite sides of the court. My chest heaved with adrenaline, but I wasn’t done. I looked back at her, catching her eyes one more time. That damn smirk still on her face. But I knew she saw me now. I knew she felt it too.

The fight wasn’t over.

That was the moment I realized. Diana Taurasi wasn’t just another player to beat. She was the one. The one I had to take down. And maybe, just maybe, she’d finally met someone who could.

Fucking Diana.

"Rivalry Ignites: O’Hara and Taurasi Get into Fiery Altercation During Friday Game"

San Antonio Stars Victoria O’Hara Adidas Grey and Black Edition Player Jersey | SOLD OUT

Requests are Open!

Massterlist

[mopopshop]

Shattered Promises

part: 3

pairing: paige bueckers x oc

a/n: how are we feeling abt it so far?? tell me in my asks (i promise it gets more interesting than this 🙏🏾🙏🏾)

---

The days since your last coffee date with Paige have flown by, filled with more study sessions and lighthearted conversations. Paige’s charm and humor have made each meeting more enjoyable than the last and you’ve found yourself looking forward to each one.

After one particular study session, Paige seems a bit more fidgety than usual. You’ve been working on the project in the cozy corner of the campus library, surrounded by textbooks and notebooks. Paige keeps bouncing her leg under the table and you can’t help but notice her nervous energy.

As you finish up the last few notes for the day, Paige clears her throat, trying to mask her anxiety. “So, uh, I was thinking...”

You look up from your notes, noticing her unusual hesitance. “Yeah? What’s up?”

Paige fiddles with her pen, her eyes darting around the room. “Well, we’ve been hanging out a lot, and it’s been really great. I was wondering if, maybe, you’d want to go out with me? Like, on a real date”

Your heart skips a beat at her words, a mixture of excitement and nerves bubbling up inside you and you can’t help but blush. In your moment of admiration you don’t realize you haven’t answered Paige’s question, just sitting there and staring.

Paige quickly tries to backpedal “But you really don’t have to, like I get you’re busy and shit so… you know what? Just- just forget about it- it’s fine don-“

You finally register her words, snapping out of your trance. “No, no, no! Paige, no, oh my god i’m sorry. Wait— I mean yes! Like no I’m not saying no, i’m saying yes! …My answers yes” your rush out your answer awkwardly. 

Paige finally meets your gaze, her cheeks flushed. “ Oh— cool, cool, I was thinking maybe a diner? There’s this really fuckin good place I know. We could just have dinner and talk. I’m not rushing you or anything, just thought it’d be nice.”

You feel a smile spread across your face. “No seriously, Paige. That sounds really nice. I’d love to.”

Paige’s face lights up with relief. “Great. Can I pick you up at seven?”

“Oh, um, sevens good!” you say, feeling a bit anxious, realizing that Paige picking you up means she’ll be at your apartment. Apartment = Rya and you can’t have Paige finding out about that yet. “But if you don’t mind, I’ll just meet you there? I have some— stuff to take care of before.”

Paige raises an eyebrow, a hint of disappointment crossing her face. “Are you sure? I can pick you up if you want.”

You give her a reassuring smile, trying to mask your worry. “No, it’s really okay. I’ll see you there.”

Paige nods, though she looks slightly puzzled. “Alright, see you at seven.”

---

That evening, you arrive at the diner Paige mentioned. The place is charming, with its retro decor and cozy booths. As you walk in, you spot Paige already seated at a booth near the window, her face brightening when she sees you.

“Hey, Lara” Paige greets with a wide smile. “You- you look gorgeous, seriously.”

“Hi,” you reply, sliding into the booth across from her. “Thanks, you don’t look to bad yourself”

Paige smiles at the compliment and hands you a menu. “So, what do you feel like?”

You glance at the menu, taking in the array of options. “I’m thinking about the classic hamburger. What about you?”

Paige grins. “They have fire nacho’s, gonna grab those. You should try the bacon cheeseburger, shits better than sex”

You flush at the comment but continue to speak. “I’m.. not really a cheese fan”

“You don’t fuck with cheese?”

“No, never really resonated with it” you laugh.

Paige takes in a sharp breath. “Might be a deal breaker for me” she states sarcastically.

You feign disappointment. “Really? And we were just starting to get along”

You both laugh and proceed to place your orders, and as you wait for your food, the conversation flows easily. You talk about everything from your favorite movies to your funniest college experiences. The food arrives and Paige’s nervousness seems to melt away as she becomes more animated and playful.

As you both dive into your meals, the conversation continues to flow naturally. Paige’s humor and charm make the time fly by, and you find yourself feeling more and more comfortable around her.

“You been asking me hella questions about myself so,” you say between bites of your hamburger. “What about you? Talk about yourself a little bit”

Paige takes a sip of her drink, considering your question. “Well, I grew up in Minnesota. Moved here for basketball, obviously. Um.. I game and I like a mean shirly temple”

You smile, rollin your eyes. “That’s all you gonna tell me? Nothing else? Any siblings?”

Paige laughs, nodding. “Damn girl, I didn’t know what you wanted me to say but yeah, I have a younger brother. He’s in middle school, so I try to be a good role model for him. We’re pretty close.”

“That’s sweet,” you reply. “It must be nice to have a sibling you’re close to.”

Paige’s eyes light up as she talks about her family. “Yeah, it is. What about you? Any siblings?”

You hesitate, knowing the consequences of your actions the more you hold off telling her about Rya. “Um.. no, no siblings. It’s.. it’s just me and my mom. We’re really close, though.”

Paige’s expression softens. “That’s nice. Family’s important.”

You both continue to chat, the conversation shifting effortlessly from one topic to another. Before you know it, the dinner is winding down, and you feel a small sense of nerves.

Paige glances at her phone. “It’s getting late. Ready to head out?”

You nod, feeling a flutter of anticipation. “Yeah, let’s go.”

Paige stands up and, to your surprise, walks over to your side of the booth and offers her hand to help you up. “Shall we?”

You smile and take her hand, appreciating her chivalrous gesture. “Thank you.”

As you walk out of the diner, Paige opens the door for you, earning another grateful smile from you. She leads you to her car, and you both get in, the comfortable silence filling the space as she drives you home.

When you arrive at your apartment complex, Paige parks the car and turns to you with a gentle smile. “I had a really great time tonight.”

“Me too,” you say softly, feeling your heart race.

Paige gets out of the car and rushes to open your door for you. You step out, giggling lightly at her actions.

“Thanks for walking me up,” you say, fiddling with your keys.

“Of course,” Paige replies, her voice a bit hushed. “So, um, can I see you again?”

You look up at her, meeting her eyes. “I’d like that.”

There’s a moment of silence, and then Paige steps a bit closer. “Alara, I… I really like you.”

Your breath catches, and you find yourself leaning in slightly. “I like you too, Paige.”

Before you can second-guess yourself, Paige gently cups your cheek and leans in, her lips brushing yours in a soft, tentative kiss. The world seems to fade away as you melt into the kiss, your heart pounding in your chest.

When you finally pull back, you’re both breathless, and Paige’s eyes are filled with warmth and affection. “Goodnight, Alara,” she whispers.

“Goodnight, Paige,” you reply, feeling a surge of happiness as you watch her walk away. You enter your apartment, a tentative smile playing on your lips

———

[sunshineandspencer]

Much needed apology (Iridescent, Part 8)

Let me stress, this is not Maeve from the show, but my own Maeve just named the same to send Spencer into hell whenever he thinks about it.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!OC.

Summary: Thanks to the love and genius of one Penelope Garcia, Spencer knows exactly what to do to get Maeve to accept his apology and start forgiving him.

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: swearing, spencer gets over himself finally

Parts: Pt1, Pt2, Pt3, Pt4, Pt5, Pt6, Pt7, Pt9

be added to the taglist

He knew he needed to go all out. With how badly he fucked up, just turning up and grovelling wouldn’t be enough. So he took Penelope’s advice.

Rushing down - and having to walk since Ava took the car - to the nearest store that he knew sold some decent wine. Glad that they only lived about fifteen minutes from work so that it wouldn’t take too long to get back to her apartment. The less time it took to apologise, the less time she had to stew and get angrier.

Finding the best bottle of rosé that money, and taste, could buy. Dragging an attendant along with him to make sure that he’s definitely getting the right thing. All the way to the card section, which was absolutely shit, so they swiftly abandoned that and went for the chocolates instead. Of course, she’s not a fan of American chocolate since she visited the UK, and so he gets her a bar of dark mint chocolate. The poor attendant quizzed on everything for their input, barely able to keep up with the genius whirlwind.

As they finally got to the tills, and the attendant rang up his items, she gave him a look. To be fair, he was desperately begging her to tell him where the nearest florist was.

“.. just how badly did you piss off your girlfriend?”

He hesitated, only a moment, but that gave him the time to realise how bitter his mouth had suddenly become at the prospect of having to say “not my girlfriend”. So he didn’t, giving a sheepish smile as he picked up the wine and the chocolate.

“She might not let me into her apartment.”

“Good luck man.” Laughing at him goodnaturedly as she gave him the receipt. “Florist is down the street, make sure you remind her that you were stupid, she’s perfect and you love her.”

Even as he walked out onto the street, it stuck to him in a way that he wasn’t sure he knew how to shake off.

‘You love her, you love her, you love her.’

But he doesn’t, he can’t. He’d only just come to terms with liking her for fuck’s sake. Surely he can’t love her yet - he definitely would’ve realised by now. He can’t.. he can’t be that oblivious to his own feelings that he fell in love without even fucking realising, right?

Absently, he wandered to the florists and bought a bouquet of lilacs, even letting the sweet old man behind the counter wrap them in brown paper, adding a ribbon around the chocolates and the wine.

When asked if he wanted to put a card with the flowers, Spencer nodded, and the man waited patiently for the message to write.

“Write.. I’m an idiot, you’re perfect and..” I love you “.. I’m sorry.”

The man gave him a look, probably for the less-than-romantic message. Nestling the card safely between the flowers and handing the items back over. Clearly, however, the man didn’t need to be profiler to realise Spencer was going off to apologise to someone.

Patting his hand softly as Spencer tried to manhandle it all into his arms, terrified of dropping the wine.

“Good luck.”

Thanking him, he hurried back out onto the streets and started walking. Once again realising just how shit of an idea it is to piss off the owner of the car they drive into work, having to walk home as quickly as possible. Dammit, it’s their car.

It had been nearly an hour now, and that was too long for her to think that she actually thinks that way about her. He needs to make this right.

Passing the little blue mini, which he has come to adore just as much as Ava, and going straight past it into the building. Using his own fob - which he had specially made after she purposely left him out in the rain - and irritably waited for the lift to get up to her floor.

Resisting the urge to use the spare key he had, knowing that barging in uninvited wasn’t the best idea, and knocking on the door.

Waiting, heart heavy and suffocating in his throat, as her footsteps got closer. The door swung open and.. she’s already glaring. How the hell did she know it was going to be him?

Thankfully, however, he watched her eyes drift down to the offerings he had for her, softening incrementally until they nearly looked like how they had before. Carefully handing over the bouquet so that he didn’t drop the wine or chocolates. Her eyes flicked to his, accusatory.

“These are my favourites.”

“I’m so sorry.”

She blinked, clearly she didn’t expect him to apologise so quickly. Especially not without teasing her first - she knows she had flour on her face.

“Spence, I-”

“No, please, let me apologise.” If his hands were free, he would’ve already been holding hers, damn chocolate and wine keeping his hands busy. “I was way out of line. I am worried about you taking on more work that you should, especially from people only taking advantage of how sweet you are. But it all came out so wrong. I didn’t mean to shout, or do it in front of so many people, I was going to say something on the way home tonight. I was overwhelmed and lashed out, but that isn’t an excuse and I shouldn’t have done it at all. I won’t do it again, ever.. unless you deserve it.”

The way she had been looking at him, clutching the flowers to her chest and just gazing at him through the apology, morphed into her usual smile at his teasing lilt returning at the end. Just what they both needed.

It did make him feel a hell of a lot better, seeing her smiling at him again, but she still hadn’t said anything.

Until she stepped aside and held the door open for him.

“Come on, I made too much pasta for myself.”

Stepping in, he can’t pinpoint why this feels different to when he comes in the morning, besides the obvious of course. Maybe because he’s going to spend (hopefully) more than ten minutes with her. 

“You’re making pasta?”

“Yep.”

“Even when half the flour ends up on your face instead?”

Ava pouted softly and swiped his arm as he stepped into the apartment, closing the door behind him. But it was nice to have that little thing between them back. Considering he’d been pulling away from her, and then lashed out, she was sure they were going to have to go back to hating each other.

Not that she’d be able to do that now, or ever.

“Rossi gave me the recipe when I joined, this is the first chance I’ve had to make it.”

It’s incredible, really, how he’s able to hold such a casual conversation with her while his subconscious is screaming that he loves her for everything.

He follows her into the kitchen, he loves her. He sets down the wine and chocolates on the counter, he loves her. She shows him the recipe that she’s following, complaining all about Rossi’s vague measurements, and God, but he loves her.

His loving mantra being stopped short in its tracks when he spots the little pink elephant on her couch, seemingly waiting for her to come back.

“You kept the elephant?”

Once again, he gets a sharp look, as she finishes up the sauce, and he wonders what the hell he managed to do now. Giving her a soft, sheepish smile to hope that it would placate her a little - it worked.

“His name is Clementine, and he doesn’t like you right now.”

Scoffing, Spencer went through her cabinets to look for the wine glasses and plates. Giving his own little look, which she challenged immediately. What kind of idiot was he, thinking he could give her up?

“I gave him to you, he can’t hate me, I’m his father.”

“Well, you upset his mother, and I’m the favourite.”

When she caught his gaze again, he was pouring the wine, and she stuck her tongue out at him. Which he returned and made them both laugh, a sound that blended so well together and eased some more of the lingering irritation in her chest.

Oh who’s she kidding, she couldn’t ever be mad at him for too long. Him and his stupid face.

Whereas he was stuck on her words, he’d upset her. He hated that.

They’d decided to eat on the couch, their ‘child’ between them, which they kept trying to subtly drag closer to themselves and away from the other person. Each of them wanting to prove that they were the favourite. Ava switched on the tv, putting on Married At First Sight Australia, claiming it was the superior version, and he willingly indulged her this time. During an ad break, he gently nudged her shoulder with his.

“We’re alright, aren’t we?”

“You bought me wine, chocolates and flowers, you’ve been forgiven, Spence.”

“So.. we’re alright?”

She laughed softly, meeting his little grin with one of her own. Nudging his shoulder back, but staying there, leaning into him and resting her head on the shoulder as the reality show kept on playing in the background. 

“Yeah, we’re alright.”

Oh, he had to focus very hard on his breathing to make sure that she didn’t realise anything was different with him. Carefully laying his own head on top of hers.

“Great, good! I’m really sorry Ave, I take back everything I ever said that hurt you.”

“Even about my driving?”

Bastard didn’t even hesitate, spinning the spaghetti around his fork as his eyes flitted to the screen, finding himself getting into her show.

“No. You drive like a lunatic and I won’t let you behind the wheel.”

“.. little shit.”

Want more?! Good!

[naughtyneganjdm]

Naughty or Nice - Chapter 2

Summary: After coming down from the high of his night together with Y/N, Negan has to face the realities of his home life. Things grow complicated when he can't get his mind off his boss and their intimate moment together.

Characters: Negan, the reader (OC) and some other characters from TWD.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51464518/chapters/130435768

Warnings: 18+, Swearing, angst, smut, etc.

Notes: There are some people from The Walking Dead that will start showing up in this story along the way even though it's an alternate universe story. Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read this.

Having sex at work was not something Negan ever expected to have happen. No one had ever interested him enough for that. Hell, he was too professional for that. Well, at least he thought he was. What happened tonight was a shock for both him and Y/N. After what they did, they cleaned up her office, sent off the work and were quick to head out. Once they agreed to see where things could go, they were both quiet. Possibly unsure about what happened. But Negan knew how he felt.

“What’s wrong?” Negan gazed over at Y/N from where he was standing across from her in the elevator after they got a notice from a driver that they were parked out front of the building. Her face was flushed over, her eyes looking worried while he kept his hands pushed into his pockets. Between the two of them in that elevator, you could tell that they were disheveled. But they were leaving after a Christmas party that night, so if they ran into anyone, he was hoping they would assume that was why. Although, he didn’t regret it. Not one bit.

“Do you think we cleaned everything good enough? You don’t think they will know, do you?” she wondered causing a smirk to tug at Negan’s lips. Looking toward the camera that was in the elevator, Negan cleared his throat and adjusted his positioning in the corner of the elevator. “I’m serious Negan. We kind of made a mess and…”

“I’m sure that everything will be fine. Also, people shouldn’t be going into your office while you’re gone,” Negan assured her with a wink hearing the nervousness in her tone. “It’s not like we left my cum covering the desk or the couch. Any mess we made, we cleaned it up with the tissues. I don’t expect a janitor to come in and inspect the tissues that are in your garbage checking to see if it’s my dried up cum on them.”

“Negan,” she scoffed looking toward the camera that was in the elevator, but all he gave in return was a shameless shrug.

“I’m just saying Y/N, we cleaned everything up. My cum was wiped up and the other stuff…” Negan’s eyes flashed over with a naughty expression that almost took her breath away with it. “That will dry up. Trust me, no one is ever going to know about our sex or how many times I made you squirt by morning.”

“You have no filtering system,” she pointed toward the camera, her cheeks turning redder if that was possible. “They can probably hear you.”

“We’re not the first people to have sex in an office building Y/N. They’ve probably had people have sex in here for fuck’s sake. And I doubt they listen back on all of the videos from all day long. We’re just two people standing in an elevator after a Christmas party,” Negan reasoned with her, pulling one of his hands out to wave it about in the air. “Sure, we had sex, but it’s not like our boss is going to know. And if he does? So fucking what? I’m sure Dwight and Sherry have done it somewhere in this building. Probably even the big boss and his wife too. People get promiscuous and horny. That shit happens.”

“You’re talking about it like it’s not a big deal,” she replied back fanning herself trying to hide the warmth that was flooding into her face. “What we did…”

“Was fucking amazing. We enjoyed ourselves and we cleaned it up. No one is going to know,” Negan hushed her with a devious smile, his eyes wrinkling with amusement that she was so worried. “We got our work done, our client is going to be happy and everything is going to be okay. I promise you that.”

Once the elevator dinged, he held his right hand out and motioned for her to leave the elevator first. “After you, Boss.”

“You just want to stare at my ass,” she pushed into the center of his chest having him stumbling back, a thick rumble of laughter falling from his throat. Moving off the elevator, she yelped when Negan moved behind her to pinch her ass. Swatting his hand away had his raspy laugh filling the empty building that only had a security guard inside of it. It was actually good that Negan was with her because her legs still felt weak from everything they had gone through.

A cool burst of air caused an immediate chill once she finally stepped outside. The sensation almost knocked her off her feet. It was an instantaneous reaction from the snow that was still falling around them. The sensation of Negan’s hand settling at the small of her back made her take in a sharp breath as he led her toward the car that was waiting. Going to reach for the door, she was halted by Negan who opened the door for her holding his hand out to help her into the car. Accepting his hand, she was somewhat in awe by the chivalry that he was displaying for her as he helped her in. Once she was comfortable, Negan slid into the car beside her and got himself situated after closing the door behind him.

The driver confirmed that they were ready and Negan knew that he had put in her address first so that way she got home safe just like he promised. Heat flooded into the car, but she still had a chill flooding her body from the freezing temperatures outside.

“You okay?” Negan questioned, his eyebrow arching when he stared out at her. Noticing that she was tremoring, Negan adjusted in the seat that he was in and pulled his jacket from his body to cover her with it. The small gesture was enough to have her swooning as he slid in closer to her rubbing his hands over her shoulders to keep her warm. “Any better?”

“I think I would have been better if I had my panties,” she whispered what she thought was low enough for only him to hear. It made Negan snicker and he leaned in to nuzzle his nose in against hers. “I know you snatched them.”

“It will be something to keep me satisfied until we get back,” Negan slurred, dragging his tongue out over his bottom lip. The warmth of his breath lingered over her lips and it made her tremor against him. A shuddering breath escaped her when he leaned in to whisper in her ear. “Even though we cleaned you up, you have no idea how fucking hot it makes me knowing that my cum is still inside of you.”

“Negan,” she hushed him, her cheeks flushing over with a warmth. Pressing her hand in over the center of Negan’s chest, she heard the amused rumble fall from him and she couldn’t believe that he said that. “You’re naughty.”

“I am,” Negan agreed with her, giving her a wink while keeping a small distance between them. Wrapping his arm around her shoulders, he drew her to him so that she could stay warm with him close to her. Hovering his lips in over her jawline, Negan’s eyelids were heavy with lust again and she knew that having him close to her like this had her pulse jumping in her throat. “I don’t know how I’m going to make it through the next few weeks when you are on my mind. Your tight…” Negan’s words vibrated against her flesh when he started drawing his bottom lip over her jawline and toward her neck, “Wet…pussy. It’s all I’m going to be dreaming about.”

“Negan,” she gasped out when the roughness of his fingertips dragged across the inside of her thigh. Lifting her gaze, she could see that the driver stole a few looks back at them every so often with her and Negan being so touchy. Gradually, Negan’s motions turned into naughty kisses that were being peppered against the side of her neck. “He’s watching.”

“There is nothing to see,” Negan noted, his lips sweeping in over hers taking her breath away with the motion. Instead of pulling away like she should have, she allowed him to kiss her like that knowing that she didn’t want to leave him tonight. Laying with him on the couch naked would have been a great way to spend her night, but she knew that she couldn’t do that. Her fiancé was waiting for her and Negan’s kids were certainly waiting for him at home. They were both leaving for the holiday and she knew better to fall into a forbidden romance with her co-worker. “You have my jacket over your lap.”

Closing her eyes shut tightly, she felt Negan’s palm flattening out over her thigh before pushing up under the skirt of her dress. With Negan’s fingers dancing across her heated flesh, she fought so hard to keep herself from crying out.

“I’m so glad we opened up with one another tonight,” Negan nibbled at her bottom lip, tugging faintly on it when his index finger traced a line up over the length of her sex beneath the jacket he covered her with. Repeating the motion several times, he flicked his tongue at the inside of her bottom lip and she turned her head toward him to bring their lips together with a wet sound. Humming against her lips had her moaning faintly and he smiled sheepishly. Urging her thighs further apart, Negan took advantage of the moment and slid one of his fingers into her welcoming sex. Burying her head against his shoulder after she dropped it down, she tried to keep herself silent. Unhurriedly, he thrust his finger into her, his hazel eyes locked on her emotions while he did it. There was a hope that the driver would have just thought they were making out with one another, but she wasn’t very good at hiding with how he was making her feel. Sure, he was trying to hide it, but if someone was smart enough, they would know what was happening.

“Me too,” she agreed with him, licking her lips and panting when Negan bit at her jawline. Back when they were at the office, she was able to tell that Negan had left some marks on her that she would have to hide over her vacation. It was something she should have been furious about. But strangely? She wasn’t. “People would look down on us for what happened tonight. Especially me.”

“Mmm…I don’t care,” Negan growled, his kisses leading to her lips. It was passionate and drew both of them to cling to one another while Negan’s finger continued to pump into her with determination.

“I’m your boss,” she reminded him with a hum, her eyes slamming shut when Negan added another finger to add to the pleasure of what he was doing beneath his jacket.

“Yes, you are,” Negan snickered, groaning out with the way she was kissing at his bottom lip. “My talented, beautiful, incredibly sexy boss.”

Reaching down, she grasped tightly to his arm when she felt a warmth building up inside of her body. More than anything she wanted to rock her hips against the motions of his fingers, but she knew that she couldn’t. Negan was having fun with this and she knew that. At this point, she didn’t even know where they were. They could have been driving in the completely wrong direction and she would have never known.

“Negan,” she panted his name, hating that she wasn’t doing a very good job at hiding the pleasure he was giving her while he fingered her in the back of this stranger’s car. Desperately clinging to him, she made sure that he was close when she felt her hips shaking against his movements. Immediately Negan picked up on her body’s response to him and his fingers pumped away inside of her hoping to get her to another orgasm. Once she did, she bit at his bottom lip hoping to silence her cries and Negan growled against her flesh. Tearing her lips away from his, she rest her head against the side of his neck. Trying to get her body to calm down was going to be hard. Between her body’s tremors and her breathing, she had no idea how she was going to walk into the apartment that she shared with her fiancé and pretend that she was okay. Gasping out, she felt Negan’s fingers pulling from her. Noticing that Negan brought his fingers to his lips had a breath catch in her throat and she found her heart hammering inside of her chest. Negan took his fingers into his mouth, his tongue lapping at the taste of her over them. “You’re gonna be the death of me.”

“Mmmm…that would be terrible,” Negan hummed, his eyelashes fluttering before she grabbed a firm hold of his hair to bring him to her so they could kiss. Each kiss was passionate feeding off the energy they were getting from each other. It was so intense that by the time that the car stopped neither one of them really noticed. It took the driver clearing his throat for them to realize that they were there. Finally Negan was the one to pull his lips from hers letting out a disappointed sigh. “I don’t want to say goodbye to you.”

“You have to,” she placed her hand over the center of his chest realizing how dangerous it was for them to be this close inside of the car in front of her home that she shared with her fiancé. Tapping him on the chest, she pressed one more faint kiss over his lips. “Goodnight Negan.”

“Goodnight,” Negan frowned when she pulled away from him, handing him over his jacket when she managed to get out of the car on her shaken legs. Watching her closely, Negan felt his chest tightening when he watched her walk up toward the door of the building she lived in. After she disappeared into the building, Negan cussed to himself and pinched the bridge of his nose.

On the way to his home, Negan noticed that he looked at his phone more times that he cared to admit. Y/N had just left him. Why would she text him? It drove him crazy to know that he was already hooked on this woman. Sure, he had always found her appealing, but after tonight he felt like they connected in a way that was too strong for either of them to be able to deny.  

Swiping his finger across the top of the screen, he sighed loudly and knew that he had to get it together. He was going home to his children and he would have to quickly fill into the role of dad. Focusing on his surroundings while in the back of the car, Negan knew that he found so much awe in the city. He loved it and it was even more beautiful when it would snow.

“We’re here,” the driver announced when he pulled up to the apartment building where Negan lived. Staring up at the building, Negan knew that his wild night of pleasure would have to be soon forgotten. Closing his eyes, he let that memory of Y/N burn into his memory before sitting forward. Lifting his hips up, Negan pulled out his wallet. Counting out money, he slid forward enough to hold it out for the driver. “What’s this?”

“You know what this is for,” Negan muttered and it took a minute for the driver to think things over before accepting the money. “Thanks for the ride.”

“No, thank you Mr. Smith,” the man gave Negan a nod when Negan got out of the car. Getting his jacket on, Negan stared up at the building and then moved into it. His walk to the elevator was slow, but when he got on the elevator, he couldn’t help but think about Y/N. The memory of her lingered in his mind when they were on the elevator tonight. He didn’t want to forget about what happened tonight. It was too perfect for him to do that.

It seemed the elevator was taking longer than normal to get to the floor his apartment was on. It gave him the time to reflect on his memories from tonight and he sighed. With a ding, the doors opened and he stepped out onto the floor hearing the sounds of the television in the background. Tipping his head to the side, Negan rounded the corner of the hallway to see that his son was stretched out across the couch.

“Beau?” Negan called out and his son’s head dropped back to look back over at Negan. A tired smirk tugged at his son’s young features and Negan pushed his hands into his pockets. In Beau’s hazel eyes he could see that his son was tired so he was surprised to see him still up so late into the night. When Negan got home, he pictured he would be coming home to a dark apartment. “What are you doing up? We have a big day tomorrow.”

Stepping toward the couch, Negan gasped when his daughter hopped up on the couch to her feet. Amusement flooded her young features when Negan jumped, not expecting her to be there. Giggles fell from her throat, her dimples sinking in and her green eyes glowing with happiness. Hopping over the back of the couch, his daughter jumped into his arms. Catching her, he pulled her in closer to his chest and stroked his fingers through her dirty blonde hair, pressing a kiss over her forehead. Laughing, he squeezed her close to him and found joy that his kids were still happy to have him home. “We were watching Christmas movies daddy!”

“Oh?” Negan peppered kisses against the side of his daughter’s face an amused rumble falling from Negan’s throat. “Erin, it is way past your bedtime baby girl. I don’t even know how you are still awake. I’m barely able to keep my eyes open right now.”

“I have an answer for that one,” Beau noted, pointing back toward the kitchen. Beau’s dimples sank in and Erin’s head buried against the side of his neck while she laughed. “Lots and lots of cookies. We baked this evening and she took down quite a few on her own. And it probably didn’t help that they were sugar cookies.”

“Why’d you let her eat so many?” Negan moved around the couch to glance down at Beau who simply stared up at Negan with an amused expression. Beau shrugged, his dimples showing that he was being silly in not getting up from the couch. With his free hand, Negan waved his son to stand up. “Don’t give me that look. Get up here you little shit.”

Snickering, Beau got up from the couch to move forward to give his father a hug and Negan placed a kiss on the top of his son’s head. Messing Beau’s dark hair up had his son laughing, “You always hug me when I come home. Don’t get too old for that shit on me.”

“I’ll never be too old for that,” Beau muttered into his father’s shoulder, squeezing his arms around Negan’s waist. “I just wanted to see how long it took to upset you.”

“You’re a dick,” Negan snickered hearing the gasp that Erin gave when she leaned back to stare up at her father from where she was in his other arm. “Don’t repeat what I said.”

“What kind of dad are you?” Beau jokingly shoved into Negan’s chest causing Negan to snort, his laugh growing with the playful banter that him and his son were having together. “You’re lucky that I love you so much.”

“That’s actually true,” Negan alerted his son, hooking his fingers around the back of his son’s head to bring him forward to place another kiss on his forehead. “I’m lucky to have you buddy. Don’t forget that. And I look forward to those hugs. It’s my favorite thing about coming home.”

“Good,” Erin piped in, cuddling in closer to Negan’s chest from where he was holding onto her. “Because we miss you when you are gone.”

 “We have some pizza and cookies waiting for you in the kitchen,” Beau pointed toward the area that the kitchen was in and it made Negan sigh. “We also got this new peppermint hot chocolate that’s actually surprisingly good. I’ve had a few myself tonight.”

“You two made cookies on your own? Where did you get the hot chocolate?” Negan inquired only to hear the sound of a door opening and he looked back over his shoulder to let out a tense sound when he saw his girlfriend was there. When her green eyes connected with his, a big, happy smile spread out over her features. Seeing her made Negan’s heart race. She wasn’t supposed to be here until tomorrow. “Hey Maggie. What are you doing here?”

“Not the response I thought I would get,” Maggie moved across the room, stepping before him and he used his free arm to wrap it around her to give her a one-armed hug. Originally, he was happy that he was going to have time to chill out. He could only imagine how he may have tasted and smelled of Y/N. Tonight he should have been able to get a shower in, a rest and then start over completely new in the morning with her when she came over. When she pulled back, she pressed a quick kiss over Negan’s lips and he hoped that she didn’t notice anything different. “I decided instead of waiting until tomorrow I would pack today and just come over so we could all leave together in the morning. I knew the kids would be alone tonight because of your party so we hung out. I brought some food and we had some bonding time.”

“All night long,” Beau dragged out his words and it was clear there was sarcasm in his tone. Nudging his son softly with his shoulder, Negan knew that Beau wasn’t the biggest fan of Maggie and he made that clear. Thankfully, Maggie just always thought Beau was a jokester and never really picked up on the fact that his son didn’t like her all that much. “Maggie brought pizza, insisted we make cookies together and then wanted us to have a sleep over with a night full of movies.”

“And I think we had fun, right?” Maggie confirmed with Beau, moving out to squeeze over his shoulder firmly. Holding her arms out for Erin, Erin looked up at Negan with big eyes wondering if she had to go over to Maggie. Negan didn’t want to force his daughter to do it, but eventually his seven-year-old sighed and then accepted the gesture from Maggie who grabbed her. “You had fun, didn’t you?”

“It was good,” Erin answered with a firm nod of her head, her tiny dimples sinking in and Negan knew that was the face of his daughter lying. Biting down on his bottom lip, Negan tried to keep his amusement in when he slid his hands into his pockets. As he did it, his fingers connected with the panties that belonged to Y/N that he had shoved in their previously. Immediately pulling his hands out of his pockets, he folded his arms in front of his chest and cleared his throat. “We watched some good movies.”

“Are you hungry?” Maggie wondered and Negan shrugged. He hadn’t really ate much today so he wouldn’t mind a bit of a snack.

“I’ll go warm some pizza up for you,” Beau moved around Negan and pat his dad on the shoulder. Heading into the kitchen left the three of them alone. Setting Erin down, Maggie noticed that she was eager to run off into the kitchen.

“No more cookies until tomorrow,” Negan called out hearing Erin giggle and she stopped to turn around. Her hands hooked in front of her and she fluttered her beautiful eyelashes up at Negan. “I said no.”

“Please. Just one more?” she begged of Negan giving him the look that she always did when she wanted him to agree to something. “I swear. Just one.”

“Fine,” Negan grumbled under his breath hearing the giggle that followed. After Erin disappeared into the kitchen, Negan called out to Beau knowing that he was the one he could count on to follow the rules. “Only let her have one more Beau!”

“Got it dad!” Beau hollered back from the kitchen giving Negan the time to turn to face Maggie who looked pleased with how things turned out today.

“Honey,” Maggie stepped forward, brushing her fingers through Negan’s hair to get it out of his face. Tipping up on her toes, she tugged at the coat he was wearing and sighed. “You smell of alcohol really bad. You drank a lot tonight?”

“I did,” Negan confessed thankful that the smell of alcohol was what she picked up on. “I worked most of the night and when I got that hour in to party, I took advantage of it. I’m sorry. I know I have to drive tomorrow, but I will be fine. I’ll drink some water now and I swear I’ll be in good shape tomorrow for your family.”

“I’m not worried about it,” Maggie whispered, caressing over the center of Negan’s chest. “I hope you’re not mad that I did this. I just wanted to try to bond with Beau and Erin. I know that Christmas time is hard for them without their mother and I just…I want to make a good impression.”

“I’m not mad at you. I appreciate the gesture. You know my kids are the most important things in the world to me,” Negan reminded her knowing that he couldn’t be mad at her for trying. He was just nervous. He wished he would have had time to himself to let the things that happened with Y/N linger. Now he was worried as hell. They agreed to wait until after the holidays to decide things. Yet, here he was standing in front of the first woman he gave a chance to after his wife died with another woman’s panties in his pocket likely still smelling heavily of her. Well, more so alcohol now and he was thankful for that. “Did Beau let you in?”

“He did,” Maggie responded dragging her fingers down in over the side of Negan’s face, teasing her fingers through his short beard. “I would think by now that I would have a key since I’ve spent a lot of nights here already…”

“I keep forgetting,” Negan lied getting tense when she tipped on her toes and her lips hovered over his. “I just have to make time to get a key made.”

“The place you work at runs you too hard,” Maggie slurred, her thumb dragging out over his bottom lip. Keeping his eyes locked with hers, Negan didn’t really know how to respond. Before being in this kind of position, he really should have brushed his teeth and taken a shower. “Now you get to take a break. Finally.”

“Kind of,” Negan breathed against her lips when she attempted to kiss him which made her huff. “I still have to keep in contact with my team and the company. I’m one of the people in charge and they can’t do this without me.”

“Don’t you have two levels of bosses ahead of you? That guy I met and that new woman?” she plucked open the top button of Negan’s shirt that was revealed beneath his jacket. Stroking her fingers over the chest hair that was there had Negan’s Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat. “They should handle it.”

“She’s going to be gone too,” Negan responded, his hands settling in over Maggie’s hips when her lips faintly brushed over his. “Unfortunately, you’re dating a work-a-holic.”

“I’ll live,” Maggie muttered hearing the children calling out to him from the kitchen.

Bouncing his eyebrows, Negan flashed her a charming smile before stepping back to head for the kitchen. Taking off his jacket, Negan set it on one of the chairs at the dining room table and noticed that Erin was sitting at the island on one of the taller stools that were there eating one of her cookies.

“These look good,” Negan muttered reaching for one of the cookies that looked meticulous and perfectly decorated. Wrinkling his nose, Negan knew that his daughter liked baking, but she wasn’t this clean. “These look too nice.”

“Maggie did most of the work and we gave her company,” Beau brought two glasses of milk over. One for Erin and one for Negan when Negan took the first bite of the cookie. “And we just talked while she did it.”

“Oh, that’s…nice,” Negan spoke hearing Maggie moving into the kitchen while he ate the cookie that he grabbed. It almost tasted store bought and while they were good, he was more of a fan of the homemade kind. Negan also considered himself a bit of a good cook and baker, so he knew maybe he was being a bit too judgmental but he knew his were better. Often, he’d let Erin decorate them too so while they may have been messy, they still tasted great. Beau joined them at the counter and brought a glass of milk for himself too before reaching for a sugar cookie himself. “Are you guys all packed for tomorrow?”

“You know I am daddy. You’re the one that packed my things,” Erin reminded Negan with another lighthearted giggle and it made Negan smile. “I don’t understand the whole Santa thing though. How is he going to know that we are at Maggie’s family’s house?”

“Well Santa is still going to come here and leave a lot of presents for both of you for when we get back,” Negan swallowed down what was left of the cookie he grabbed before reaching for another one. Maggie moved around the kitchen and Negan could see that she was preparing a glass of the hot chocolate that they were talking about earlier for him. “But he still is going to manage to bring some gifts to where you are on Christmas. Just the bigger things will be here for when we get back.”

“Oh,” Erin finished off her cookie and reached for the glass of milk that Beau got her, grabbing it firmly with both of her hands. Watching her chug down the milk made Negan snort and he shook his head when she slammed the glass back down on the counter. “That was good.”

“You’re ridiculous,” Negan snorted, leaning in to pepper kisses against the side of her face. “I love you and your brother so much you stinker.”

“Crap,” Beau heard the sound of the alarm he set going off. Hopping down from his seat, he went over to the oven and used an oven mitt to get the pizza he was warming up for his father out. Turning things off, he tossed the pizza onto a plate. Heading back over to the island, Beau placed the plate in front of Negan before heading back to his seat.

“Thanks kiddo. You’re the best,” Negan appreciated that his son still helped to take care of things around the house. At thirteen, Beau really had to step up to be the man of the house when he wasn’t there and he was proud of his son. Reaching for one of the pieces, Negan blew on it in attempts to cool it before taking a big bite. After the night he had, he didn’t care if this wasn’t fresh, it still tasted good. “This is great Maggie. Thank you.”

“It’s no worries,” Maggie looked back at Negan with a half-smile while Negan finished off the piece he was eating before reaching for another. Maggie’s smile tugged at her lips from where she was standing working on the hot chocolate. “I know it’s your favorite. I figured Beau and Erin would like it too.”

With a simple nod, Negan smirked and went back to eating the pizza. Feeling his phone vibrate in his pocket, Negan reached for his phone to see that it was a text from Y/N. Making sure that no one was close, he opened the text.

Tonight was great Negan. Thank you.

An inexplicable smile pressed in over Negan’s features, his thumb swiping in over his phone. Thinking of something to write back, he gazed up once more to make sure that he was safe in responding to her.

We’ll have to do it again sometime soon, Boss. Working with you tonight was a real pleasure.

“Did something good happen at work today?” Beau spoke up and it made Negan’s jaw flex, his eyes lifting from his phone to stare out at his son who was sipping on his milk. Shit. Maybe he was smiling too much with his phone. “You look happier today than normal.”

“He’s probably just happy that he finally gets a break from everything there,” Maggie suggested from where she was standing behind Beau. Nodding his head, Negan snapped his fingers and pointed toward her. Shoving his phone back into his pocket, Negan made sure that it was safely away when he finished up his last piece of pizza.

“That’s exactly it,” Negan was curious if he seemed to be in a better mood than normal and it was that obvious that something happened that lifted his spirits at work. “I’m just happy I get to spend the next few weeks with my children and enjoy the holidays.”

“I’m just warning you now that my family is going to be excited having children around. It’s been a long time since we’ve actually had children at these things so they are going to be wanting to do everything with them,” Maggie finished up with the hot chocolate and moved around Negan to hand it out to him. Accepting the mug that she gave him, Negan brought it up and took a long sip of the hot liquid treat. “None of my siblings have had children yet and I think it disappoints my dad. He always wanted grandchildren, but none of us have had any. Not even my stepbrother. So they are going to be pampered while they are there.”

“Even though we’re not your kids?” Beau spoke up in a whisper and Maggie smirked, reaching out to mess at Beau’s dark hair like Negan had done previously. Beau wasn’t as comfortable with Maggie doing it as he was his father, but he let it slide. “I mean, we’re just your boyfriend’s children.”

“I’m telling you, they are going to be super excited to have you there. Especially my stepmom. She’s really good with children and having them around for Christmas will make her happy. She really loved doing this kind of stuff with us when I was little,” Maggie assured Beau with a wink and she sighed loudly. “Even if they weren’t ridiculous about Christmas with children, they would be good to you because you’re important to me.”

Hearing that made Negan feel guilty. This was still a pretty new relationship for him. He’d been dating Maggie for about six months and he never really expected it to get as serious as it did. Truthfully, when he met Maggie, he didn’t think much about things. Maggie chewed him out on the street that day, he offered to buy her dinner and the two of them ended up having sex in a bathroom together after a few drinks. It wasn’t something he even thought would be more than a one-night stand, but they kept running into one another, so he figured it was the world hinting to him that maybe there was something there. Maggie was the first person he slept with after his late wife Lucille passed so it felt like he had to feel a certain way toward her.

“This is good,” Negan commented after he took another sip of the hot chocolate. For a few, they were just all silent and Negan didn’t know exactly what to say. He was still tipsy, his mind on other things and he knew that his kids were uneasy about the idea of being with Maggie and her family. Christmas was hard for all of them without Lucille. Finishing up the hot chocolate, Negan rubbed his hands together and pointed down the long hallway toward their bedrooms. “It’s time for bed. Daddy has to get in a shower and you two need to sleep.”

“I’ll get a shower ready for you,” Maggie pointed back down the hallway causing Negan to smirk.

“You don’t have to do that,” Negan suggested, but she was already headed down the hallway and he sighed.

“This is gonna suck dad,” Beau spoke up when Maggie disappeared into his bedroom at the end of the hallway. “I know she tries. She really does, but she’s nothing like mom. She’s so uptight and on all the fucking time.”

“Hey,” Negan hushed Beau after he said that word making Erin giggle and bury her head against Negan’s shoulder.

“Like you don’t swear all the time,” Beau reminded his father and Erin’s big eyes looked up at her dad. Sighing loudly Negan knew that he was right. Picking Erin up from the seat, Negan held her in his arms while they stood in the kitchen together. “I think Maggie is nice dad, but she’s just so…”

“Not like mom,” Erin reiterated reaching for Beau when he moved around the island. Erin clung tightly to her brother while he held onto her. “Mom was fun. We could get messy, play and she wouldn’t care. Maggie is not really fun. She brings nice gifts and she’s nice, but not…mom nice.”

“No one is ever going to be your mom guys. Your mom was one in a million,” Negan responded with a shrug of his shoulders knowing that they were right. Lucille was an incredible woman and the kids loved her just as much as he did. She brought light to their lives and happiness. Without her, something was definitely missing with all of them. “Maggie is trying. You have to remember that she’s not used to children being around.”

“It’s obvious,” Beau blurt out with a roll of his eyes, spinning his sister around in his arms making her laugh. “Sometimes I think she knows that you are a good catch so she doesn’t want to let go of that.”

“A good catch?” Negan chuckled with a thick rumble of laughter and Beau threw one of his arms out to hold it about gesturing to the apartment they were in.

“Dad, you have a good job. Your apartment is amazing. I’ve been to my friend’s homes. I know how lucky we are,” Beau stepped toward the large windows in the kitchen that looked over the city. “You’re rich dad. You have your shit together…kinda…”

“I don’t think Maggie is a gold digger if that’s what you’re suggesting,” Negan knew to stand up for Maggie in that sense because he never got that feeling from her, ever. Maggie was more of a relaxed woman that never took advantage of the fact he had money.

“No, I don’t think she’s a bad person dad,” Beau declared, his voice hitching because of how it was getting deeper with his age. “I just…she doesn’t feel right in our family. As a friend, sure…”

“I hear you buddy,” Negan hooked his arm around his son’s shoulders leading him toward the hallway to get them to their rooms. “Let’s get through the holidays and then we will figure everything out. Okay?”

“I hope we make it through the holidays,” Beau huffed, helping Negan get Erin in for bed. They both hung around to read her a story until she was finally asleep. Following Beau to his bedroom, Negan stopped when he saw the drawings that were on Beau’s desk. Reaching out for one of them, he saw that it was a photo of Lucille that Beau had been drawing. “That’s not done.”

“Beau, this is…” Negan reached for a few of the other drawings that were there noticing how talented his son had grown over the years. A lot of them were focused on Lucille and it took his breath away. “These are beautiful.”

“It’s the one way I can keep her alive,” Beau stepped in beside Negan who was staring down at the drawings. “Sometimes I get scared that I will forget what she looks like. So I draw her the way that I remember her. Her smile…”

Gazing at his son, he saw the tears that were developing in Beau’s eyes and Negan felt his heart break looking at the emotions his son was experiencing, “If I didn’t have that message she left for me on the phone, I think I would have forgotten what her voice sounded like.”

“I miss her too,” Negan was honest with his son noticing that he was getting emotional himself over the small moment they were having here. “I miss her painting the walls a new color every few months. Her ridiculous projects that she was always coming up with…”

“A lot of them never made sense, but they were fun,” Beau remembered reaching up to wipe at his eyes with the back of his hand. “I don’t want you to think I don’t love you dad, but Erin was always your shadow and I was mom’s. I miss that. I miss it so much.”

“Come here,” Negan set down the drawings, wrapping his son up in his arms tightly. Squeezing him close, Negan could hear his son crying and he didn’t blame him. This time of the year was always the worst for them. Lucille was so good with Christmas. By now, their apartment would have been covered in decorations. Top to bottom. Lights would have filled the hallways, music would be playing and everything would have always smelled like Christmas. Now he had a tree in the corner of the living room, but it wasn’t quite the same. Holding Beau long enough for him to calm down, Negan leaned back and captured his son’s jaw between his thumb and his index finger. “You were the one thing she was always the proudest of. You know that?”

“Yeah?” Beau muttered, his voice rasp and full of sadness when they talked about Lucille.

“Yeah. Me too. You were a surprise, but shit kid, you’re the best surprise I’ve ever gotten,” Negan brushed his fingers through Beau’s hair and he shook his head. “You might look like me, but you are so much like your mother. And you are so fucking talented. I couldn’t be prouder. You’re good at everything. It’s unbelievable how much talent is in one young boy.”

“You’re just saying that,” Beau pulled away from Negan to head over to his bed to sit down on the edge of it.

“I’m not. I have the coolest fucking kid in the world. You draw, you play like what…four fucking instruments? And you’re good at all of them. You’re an actor. You’re a good cook. You know how to fix cars…” Negan listed off and Beau snickered, curling his fingers around the edge of the bed. “You love photography, you paint…”

“You taught me that stuff dad,” Beau pointed out and Negan threw his hands up in the air.

“Beau, I was never this fucking talented at your age,” Negan nodded toward the drawings that were on Beau’s desk. “You’re smart. You’re sweet and you’re a great big brother. I don’t think you realize how awesome you really are kid. Truthfully? You’ve probably had to grow up fast because of me. You take care of your sister,” Negan headed over to sit down beside Beau on his bed and he sighed. “And you’ve taken care of me. Which was something you should have never had to do.”

“We’re a family. That’s what you do when you love someone,” Beau claimed, drawing Negan to stare out at him and narrow his eyes out at his son. “You’re an amazing dad. You work hard, yet you always still manage to make time for us. You always have. That’s what mom loved the most about you. You showed up, all the time. When you fall, I pick you up. When I’ve fallen, you’ve always saved me dad. Mom and you taught me from a very young age that when you love someone, you work hard to show it. You never know when someone is going to be gone. We learned that with mom. So I will always show my love for you and Erin. You work hard for us, so I will work hard for you.”

“I don’t know what I would have done without you,” Negan muttered with a shuddering breath, hooking his arm around Beau again to pull him in close for another hug. That was something he meant. If Beau wasn’t there, he was sure he would have broken down and given up, but his son always kept him going. Even in the worst moments of his life. “I love you so much bud. You’re the best kid a dad could hope for. Just listening to you talk…seeing the way you are…I don’t know how I got so lucky. I love you so fucking much.”

“I love you too,” Beau repeated, giving Negan one more big hug before getting up to get ready to go to bed. Even though Beau was upset, he was putting on a strong façade. It was his way of dealing with things and Negan knew that. “You should go get some sleep. We have a big drive tomorrow.”

“Yes dad,” Negan teased his son, standing up from the bed nudging his son playfully before heading for the door. “I love you so much kiddo. Never forget that.”

Giving Beau a wink, Negan closed the door behind him and then unhurriedly moved to his bedroom. Entering his room, he let out a tight exhale when he saw that Maggie was getting ready for bed standing before him in her lingerie. Swiftly closing the door behind him, Negan started undoing the buttons in his shirt and he knew that she noticed he was sad.

“Everything okay? Did the kids get to bed?” she spoke up and Negan nodded. Getting his shirt apart, Negan pulled it from his body and tossed it toward the hamper hearing her sigh. “What happened?”

“We just started talking about Lucille. Beau and I,” Negan didn’t lie. There was no point. Working to get his pants off after he kicked out of his shoes, Negan stood before Maggie in his boxer briefs and shrugged his shoulders. “It’s hard around this time of the year.”

“I understand,” she stepped forward, her hands reaching out to caress in over the side of Negan’s face. Lowering down, Negan hooked his fingers into his socks to pull them off and sighed. “What can I do to make you feel better?”

“I just need to take a shower,” Negan informed her pointing in the direction of the shower. Going to move for the bathroom, Negan stopped when he felt her fingers hooking around his wrist. “Maggie, I just…it’s hard around this time of the year without her. Things are really different. The kids miss her, I miss her…”

“I know,” she hushed him, pulling herself in closer to him with her fingers stroking over the center of his chest to tease through the dark curls of hair. “I just wish I knew what I could do to help you. A way to make you feel better.”

“Just time,” Negan responded knowing that he would never get over the death of Lucille. She was the love of his life and nothing would change that. He would always love his wife and he wasn’t sure that Maggie would understand that. Truthfully? Negan wondered if he was the first big relationship that she ever had. “Thanks Maggie.”

“Sure,” she eyed him over when he headed for the bathroom.

Turning on the shower, Negan noticed that she put out a towel for him along with a set of clothes for him to put on once he was done with the shower. The kids weren’t wrong, she was kind of controlling in a way. Negan kicked out of his boxer briefs and then stepped under the warm spray of the water. Today was a big day mentally for him. Between what happened with Y/N at work and his conversation with Beau, Negan was in a whirlwind of emotions. Pressing his hands against the wall of the shower, Negan remembered what it was like tonight with Y/N. It was something that was lingering in his mind and he wished he could have talked to her right now.

With Maggie in his bed, Negan spent more time in the shower than he should have. Scrubbing good enough in hopes that she wouldn’t realize something happened tonight. Turning the shower off once he was done, Negan grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his body. Wiping the steam off the mirror, he braced his hands on top of the counter and he stared out at himself. The right thing would have been to tell Maggie. Instead of dragging her on. Then again, she did mention the kids being pampered at her family’s home. They deserved that kind of thing during Christmas after everything they had been through with Lucille.

Pushing aside his feelings, Negan got dressed, brushed his teeth and then headed out into the bedroom to see that Maggie was sitting up watching something on the television. Crawling into the bed beside her, Negan turned off the light that was beside his head and laid down trying to get comfortable.

“What do you think about marriage?” Maggie muttered after Negan had cuddled his head in against the pillow and closed his eyes to try to sleep. Gradually, his eyes fluttered to an open and he looked up at her. “That way you can try to start over?”

“We’ve talked about this before,” Negan reminded her knowing that it was something Maggie had brought up a lot in the past. He knew that she wanted him to ask her to marry him, but there were a lot of factors that had kept him from doing that. Negan knew this was a relationship where he got into it because he felt lonely. And that’s not how relationships were supposed to be. In his mind at least. Sure, he was comfortable enough, but he didn’t feel that connection that he knew that he felt when he was with Lucille.

“I know we’ve talked about it before, but with Christmas around the corner, it was just on my mind. All of these romance films playing on almost every channel,” she waved her hand about pointing toward the television where she had one of the typical Christmas films on. “It gets you thinking about things. Where you want your life to go.”

“I prefer Die Hard,” Negan scoffed, lifting his head enough to look over at the television knowing that he was never a fan of those kind of movies after Lucille passed away. She liked them a lot and it was kind of her thing that the kids and him would tease her about. “Or Home Alone. Those are good.”

“Negan,” Maggie frowned that he was avoiding the discussion and he shrugged his shoulders. “You know when I first met you, you drove me crazy.”

“Yeah, you hated me. And then you fucked me,” Negan reminded her hearing the snicker that she released and it made Negan laugh. “I mean it’s the truth. You wanted to kill me and then we were screwing in the dark bathroom stall of a bar. You were wild, even for me. And that says something because I had a time where I was a bit too much myself.”

“We know how things started with us,” she noticed that Negan was lifting up on his elbows to stare out at her, his eyebrows arched. “I just thought by now I would be married and found the love of my life. Here I am now with you and it’s close to Christmas…”

“I know Christmas makes people feel a certain way,” Negan stated letting out a tense breath when Maggie adjusted in the bed beside him. Huffing out, Negan felt her crawling in over him and her hands braced in over the center of his chest. “Mags.”

“I like your children. I like you…” she palmed down in over the center of his chest down toward his abdomen to grasp at his body through his pajama pants. “You have one of the nicest cocks I’ve ever seen.”

“Is my cock important to you?” Negan’s slurred not sure how to respond while she palmed up and over his body. In other circumstances this may have turned him on, but it really wasn’t.

“I’m just saying you have a nice one,” she pointed out and they both looked down having him shift underneath her uncomfortably. “A lot of people don’t have a big dick and know what to do with it. You do. You make me feel good. I like being around you…”

“So that’s what you’re looking for? Someone with a nice cock that can make you feel good for the rest of your life?” Negan arched his eyebrow, trying to understand what she was saying and he could tell that he had her flustered. “I’m just trying to understand here Maggie. What is it about me that makes you want to marry me?”

“Of course it’s not your cock that makes me want to marry you. I want what every woman wants. To find a man that she is head over heels in love with that makes her happy. I want to have a life with someone that I enjoy sharing my life with. Someone that is my best friend where our chemistry is off the charts. Where every moment we look forward to being with one another and when we are apart, it’s miserable,” she lowered down to pepper kisses over Negan’s bottom lip. It was hard to react to that because Negan didn’t feel that with Maggie. He never did. He just liked not being alone. Loneliness made the pain of everything else feel so much worse.

“And that’s what you feel when you are with me?” Negan didn’t even really know how Maggie felt because she would tell him that she loved him. She was over all the time, but they never really connected with one another that well.

“Of course,” she kissed him further, reaching for the drawer that was beside the bed. Pushing a few things around, she returned with a condom and Negan licked his lips. “Let’s get one of these in before we go. I doubt we’re going to be able to get something in when we are there so…”

“Listen,” Negan slid further up, stopping her when she went to undo his pajama pants. Giving her an empathetic look, Negan looked down toward his lap and shook his head. “I don’t think I’ll be able to get it hard Maggie. I drank a lot tonight and with the kids still bouncing around…us having sex probably isn’t a good idea.”

“I’m sure after some work I can get the big guy going,” she went to move again, but Negan snatched the condom from her fingers to drop it back into the drawer. Closing it, Negan reached up to stroke his fingers over the side of her face. “Is everything okay?”

“I feel kind of vulnerable right now,” Negan pulled her further in over his lap allowing her to cup his face in her hands. “Can we just kiss tonight? It’s just with everything so focused on Lucille tonight, I’m just sad and I could really use some cuddling and kissing.”

“Aw, baby,” she frowned stroking her fingers in over the side of Negan’s face. With a weak smile, Negan didn’t know why he didn’t click with Maggie. She was feisty and he liked them that way. She could kick his ass easily and she would if she wanted to. She was stunning. Beautiful. Full of energy, but there was just something that was missing. Bringing their lips together, Maggie stroked her fingers over the back of his neck attempting to get intimate with him. A soft, faint knocking sound was heard and it was followed by the bedroom door opening which had Maggie pulling herself from over Negan.

“Hey honey,” Negan sat up in the bed seeing that Erin was standing at the door holding her blanket and her stuffed animal in her arms. “Are you okay?”

“Daddy? Can I sleep with you tonight?” Erin begged of her father and without even thinking about it, Negan pat the bed beside him making room for her. Sure, he could have asked Maggie, but this was his daughter. And honestly? He was thankful for her wanting to be in here with him. It stopped Maggie from getting handsy with him. Closing the door after she entered the room, Erin hopped up on the bed and Negan adjusted the blankets for her to get comfortable in beside him. “I just don’t want to be alone right now.”

“There is nothing wrong with that baby,” Negan pressed a loving kiss over his daughter’s cheek, getting comfortable as she cuddled herself in his arms. Gazing back over his shoulder, he shot Maggie an empathetic look and she seemed to understand. Turning off the lights, Maggie got comfortable in bed with them and her arm hooked around Negan from behind. Having the warmth of her breath at the base of his neck felt nice and being held was something he enjoyed, but he wondered if it was really Maggie that he wanted it to be with.

Like this? It was pretty easy to fall asleep. And he was exhausted. So he didn’t wake up until it was morning and it was Maggie that started moving. Even Erin was moving about before he finally got up. There was the headache that he was expecting from over drinking last night. Usually, he didn’t drink that much and that was why. He hated having hangovers. At this point, he just had to get dressed and finish packing a few things.

Frowning, Negan looked back over his shoulder at his dresser. Moving toward the top drawer, he pushed a few things around and grabbed the black box that he had shoved in there a week or two ago. Opening it, he gazed over the engagement ring that he had bought for Maggie after she had brought it up several times. Knowing that he hated being lonely and he liked the company, Negan had bought this in hopes to appease Maggie. There was the notion that he would propose to Maggie at her family’s home on Christmas. Swiping his thumb in over the ring, he sighed and closed the box backup. At this point, he didn’t even know if he should bother bringing this with him. With how he was feeling in the last day, he was actually questioning his judgement.

“Fuck,” Negan heard someone moving throughout the hallways and he headed over toward the bag to push the box into his bag to keep it hidden. Beau knocked at the doorframe and Negan threw the bag in over his shoulder.

“I got some coffee started for you,” Beau informed his father with a weak smile. Beau didn’t want to do this and Negan knew that, but he wasn’t complaining. Which was something that he appreciated from his son.

“You’re a life saver,” Negan pressed a kiss against Beau’s temple before moving to the kitchen with everyone. All of the bags were ready, Negan just needed to drink his coffee and then he would take everyone’s things to the car.

Beau helped him get things situated before they all got into his SUV and started their journey. Negan picked something up for them to eat and then they were headed to Maggie’s family’s home. The sad thing is? When they used to do this with Lucille, the car was never quiet. They always had some kind of fun or talking going on. Right now? It was silent. Maggie was holding onto his hand, Erin was taking a nap and Beau was reading a book. Boring would be an understatement.

Every so often Negan would try to start a discussion, but it was hard to get really any of them interested. Lucille was always the one that was good at this stuff. He was good at being silly and getting the laughs, but she was good at keeping everyone excited and happy. No matter how lame their vacation was about to be.

The drive was longer than any of them would have liked. By the time they started getting out in the middle of nowhere, Negan could see that Beau was staring out at the window and he was panicked. The only life that Beau and Erin ever knew was the life of the city. So this? This was completely different for them.

Maggie directed Negan to her home and when Negan got there, he drove up the long winding driveway to the large home that sat up on the hill. It was nothing but land, trees and their farm and that alone made his family uncomfortable. Negan could just tell by their breathing that neither one of his children knew how to react.

Getting out of the car, Negan noticed that people were coming to the door after they heard the car. Maggie got out of the car and ran up the driveway to meet a younger blonde girl to give her a big hug to spin her around. Beau got out of the car with Negan and met him at the door where he was going to grab Erin.

“What the hell did you get us into dad?” Beau wondered, grabbing a hold of Negan’s arm to get him to look back at the home before Negan went for Erin. “There is enough time for us to turn around and take off. What do you think?”

“We can’t do that Beau,” Negan frowned, rubbing at the back of his neck in a moment of tension. “I do agree with you though, I’m not a fan of how all of this feels.”

“Shit,” Beau muttered under his breath, his eyebrows furrowing when he helped his father get Erin out of the car along with their things. By the time their things were unpacked, Maggie was bringing her family down to meet them.

“Negan, Beau, Erin…this is my little sister Beth, this right here is my stepbrother Shawn, this is my stepmother Annette,” Maggie was introducing them and each person would shake the hand of every single one of them until she got to her father. “And this is my daddy, Hershel.”

Now that’s where things got weird. Hershel shook the hand of both of the kids, but when he got to Negan, he stared down at Negan’s hand like it was disgusting. Maggie looked tense when she reached out to place her hand in over her father’s shoulder, “Daddy.”

“I’ve heard a lot about you,” Negan let out a tense sound when Hershel finally accepted his hand, but the pressure that Maggie’s father was putting on his hand was extraordinarily hard. It surprised Negan because even by the look in Hershel’s eyes he seemed furious with Negan. A man he had never met or even talked to. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

“So you’re the guy that’s keeping my daughter all the way out there in the city?” Hershel confirmed with Negan making Negan let out a hesitant exhale and looked to Maggie. At this point, Negan was trying to let go of Hershel’s hand but he was still holding onto his hand.

“I thought Maggie was in the city long before she ever met me,” Negan recalled and he pulled his hand back enough for him to stumble after Maggie nudged her father to release Negan.

“I was,” Maggie offered up and Beau shot his father a look like he was shocked with what just went down. “Do you guys want to see around the farm? We have horses, those are pretty cool. What do you say Erin?”

“Sure,” Erin shrugged her shoulders, not sure what to exactly agree to now that they were on the farm.

“Hershel,” Annette nudged Hershel’s arm nodding toward a car that was starting to pull up the long driveway and it parked beside Negan’s SUV. “She’s here.”

“And?” Hershel rumbled surprising Negan, his head tipping to the side when both Hershel and Maggie stayed back when the rest of the family ran out to the car that had just arrived. At this point, Negan was seriously considering what Beau suggested. At first, Negan thought this was going to be easy, but he noticed there was an immediate hate that Maggie’s father seemed to have for him.

“I’ll be back,” Maggie caressed over Hershel’s arm before nodding toward the car that showed up. “You will have to excuse me, there is another one of the members of the family.”

Clinging tightly to his bag, Negan didn’t know how to respond to everything happening. Negan was thankful that the spotlight was taken off of him, but maybe he shouldn’t have done this. Maggie was the one that convinced him that this was a good idea. And now with his children standing behind him uncomfortable, he felt like maybe this was a stupid idea to begin with.  

“It’s so good to see you,” Maggie had stepped forward drawing Negan to look over his shoulder. A grunt fell from his throat, his chest tightening when the woman that she was hugging turned on her heel after hugging Maggie.

Immediately a yelp fell from her throat when Negan’s eyes connected with hers, “Negan?”

“Y/N?” Negan muttered, his head tipping back when he realized this was the world’s way of fucking him over to the extreme right now.

“You two know one another?” Maggie pointed between the two of them noticing the discomfort in both of their bodies when they saw one another. There was a silence and everyone was looking between the two of them. “Negan?”

“Yeah, she’s my boss,” Negan threw his hand up in the air pointing out at Y/N feeling his heart hammering inside of his chest. Dropping his head down, he felt a warmth flooding into his cheeks realizing exactly where this was going. “Shit.”

----

Tags: @slutlanna976 @fuckthis-and-fuckthat @jennydehavilland @de-gabyconamor​ @ibelongtonegan @smallsadjellyfish @labyrinthofheartagrams  @msjamesmarch @thebeautysurrounds @hotfornegan @redmercysugar @caprithebunny​ @tuttifuckinfruitty @emoryhemsworth @a-girl-interupted @akumune​ @stoneyggirl2 @xsarcasticwriterx  @insertneganhere​ @haleygreen23​ @xhannahbananax03 @sanctuaryforthelost​ @burningredaffair @killaweiser @dead-of-niight  @ayumi-wolf @hollyismentallyillhelp @promiscuousbarnes​ @tone-stark @lanadelnegan

[romanreignseater]

Press Play Pt. 2

Roman Reigns x Black Female! OC (Xena)

Rating: 18+

Warning: No warning really, just sad times 😔.

“Being the girlfriend to a famous divorced father of 5 wasn’t your plan at 26 years old. You trusted him with your life, so you agreed to film a little something, but now you regret ever meeting him when your whole life is exposed.”

A/N: Last part on next Sunday and it’s gonna be something special. I hope you all enjoy this part and I may or may not have given another cliffhanger.

GIF: @jeysuso

It’s been a week since the video leak and since you last saw Roman. And let’s just say the media has YET to let up.

“Roman Reigns, Rated R?! Take A Sneak Peak Into The Spicy Life Of The Hot and Heavy Heavyweight.”

“Roman Reigns Purposely Post His Sex Tape In Spite Of Ex-Wife’s New Beau?!”

“Roman’s Slut, Gold Digging Girlfriend EXPOSED For The Clout Chaser She Is.”

“Roman Reigns Losing Fans?! Did He Release His Tape In Order To Suffice His Absence On SmackDown?!”

Yeah it was a lot…

But, nonetheless you had a huge support system around you and they made you feel better.

The video wasn’t that bad as no one saw anything other than the curve of your ass. But you shouting how much of a little cock slut you were. That one part stretched across social media and your Instagram comments was filled with “I’m a little slut” and “Fuck me harder daddy.”

The day of the incident swirled in your head back and forth. The tears in Roman’s eyes was unlike anything you’ve seen before. His deep and uncontrollable breaths broke your heart.

As much as you loved him, he hurt you bad. Nearly 300 missed calls in only a week. 440 text notifications and 50 attempted FaceTime calls. Through your Ring Doorbell, you could see his many attempts to reach you in person.

You were hiding out at your best friend’s house knowing he would try to see you, but you’d have to go home soon since your best friend was going to see her family.

“You’re gonna have to go eventually sis.” You sat on her couch, wig barely on, nails chipped, tissues all around you, and a tub of ice cream as your new best friend. “Do I have to?!” You put on your best puppy dog eyes.

“Sweetie that’s not gonna work on me. I’m gonna see my family and I don’t want to come back to police tape surrounding my front yard.”

Rolling your eyes you sat up and began to clean up. “Look sis, I want to be better. You’ve always been tough and I know you’ve gotten over this. The real problem is, you’re missing Ro.” The mention of his name made you tense.

“Can we not Taylor?!”

“Xena… we have to. I know you miss him, but he didn’t mean to.” “HE HURT ME TAY.” The tears began to form in your eyes at the thought of your fall out.

Hands on hips, Taylor wasn’t feeling your reaction.

“That man has made you the happiest I’ve ever seen. It’s been THREE YEARS, you can’t just ditch out on him for something you don’t even talk about anymore. Every night it’s, ‘why did he hurt me?!’ ‘I thought he loved me.’ ‘He was supposed to be the one, we talked about marriage and kids’, and you just want to throw that away over a mistake. If I recall you agreed to a sex tape, and of course you didn’t want it out there, but it is and the best thing you could is hear him out.”

You sat down, absorbing everything Taylor just said and she was right.

Roman made a mistake, a really, stupid mistake. But, you knew his heart and knew he didn’t mean what he did. You weren’t the only suffering in this situation. His kids were suffering, his family, his business, and he himself was suffering.

“You know what you need to do Xe.”

“I do.”

“You guys still have that baecation booked and I’m pretty sure you can’t cancel.”

Your eyes jumped out of its socket in realization. You and Roman planned a little trip to Bora Bora to spend more time together.

And now… you had to come face to face with him.

Roman’s POV

I’ve called and called and called, but to no avail. Even though the clips that circulated are no longer visible, nothing can ever be erased from the internet.

My ex-wife’s barking finally stopped. My kids last four kids are pretty young, and don’t understand. My oldest daughter definitely knew what was going on. Luckily, she didn’t disown me as her father, but she definitely was disappointed. I didn’t teach her to do that, so I shouldn’t have done that.

But, the only thing on my mind was Xena.

Her smile, her eyes, her hair, her stunning body, the way she laughed, the way she hugged me, the way she kissed me, the way she looked at me , and just the overall way she loved me.

I never felt so loved by someone in my life.

I stared at the diamond ring resting on my bedside table. I came up with the idea to plan a getaway to Bora Bora, which Xena thought was just to spend more time together. But, in reality it was plan to propose.

I’ve been with this… well I guess was in a relationship with this woman for three years. My parents loved her, my kids, and even my ex-wife had a relationship with her. Lying in bed alone at night was something I haven’t felt in a long time.

The tears began to well just at the mere thought of her gorgeous smile and beautiful chemistry between us. I began to sob, missing her badly.

The trip still fluttering in my mind, as we had to leave tonight and I was afraid I’d be leaving by myself. As my tears began to dry, I heard my phone ding. Strengthening my self back up, I pick up my phone and my mouth dropped.

“La’u Tausala 🤩😈.”

iMessage

I quickly open up my phone wondering what she had to say after ignoring me for so long.

“Don’t forget about the trip, you’re supposed to pick me up at 6 tonight.”

My heart couldn’t stop beating. I could tell she wasn’t really mad at me, cause she’d totally would block me.

“Of course, I’ll be there at 6. Also, I’m really sorry angel. It was never my intent to release that tape, it was private and I invaded your privacy. I hope you could have it in your heart to understand how remorseful I am. I love you baby with every fiber in my being, and I can’t see myself without you. I’ll see you tonight ❤️.”

Seen

Xena’s POV

It was 5:54 and I was currently wrestling my luggage, trying to get it to close.

It was a trip to Bora Bora, so of course I wasn’t bailing. But, I really didn’t want to see Roman right now. Yet, Taylor was right, I missed him badly and I was totally over the comments and headlines.

The hurt in my heart still yearned and longed. Then, the doorbell rang. I ran downstairs and looked out the window. Roman’s black Escalade stood tall in my driveway. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

There he was…

Tall, dark, and handsome.

His tan and lean body clad in an all black sweatsuit, all black Jordan’s enclosing his feet.

His hair kept well in a tight ponytail. Not a strand out of place.

“Hey.”

You draw from your thoughts and spoke up.

“Hey, umm I’m still trying to get my suitcase to close so I’ll out in a second.”

“I can help out if you want.”

I contemplated whether or not I should let him in, but I just couldn’t.

“No, I-I got it. Just wait in the car for me please.” He smiled lightly and headed back to the car. I close the door and held my back against it.

“I don’t even know what’s gonna happen on this trip and honestly I don’t wanna know.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What’s gonna happen on the baecation?! Find out next week on the final part to “Press Play”

THE END.

MY TAG SQUAD: @cyberdejos2 @thesamoanqueen @nayys-world @mzv11 @babybatlover @vogueyonce @harmshake @harlem11680 @seeingstarks @thewarlordsworld @alyyaanna @southerngirl41 @christinabae @pitlissa22 @thealliasylum @fame-ass-ers @iluvthebloodline

[mrs-snape5984]

“How can you miss someone, you've never met? 'Cause I need you now, but I don't know you yet…”

“But can you find me soon because I'm in my head? Yeah, I need you now, but I don't know you yet…” (“IDK You Yet” by Alexander 23)

Being devoted to a fictional character for about 21 years can be challenging from time to time. Sure, it’s called “having a comfort character” for reasons, and I can’t deny, that my long lasting love for Severus Snape has given me the much needed comfort and consolation all over those years. He was by my side, whenever I felt the urge to escape from my traumatic reality���and fuck…there was way too much in my life, which made me flee to Severus. Don’t worry, I won’t mention all these experiences in this text (I’ve already done this in one of my other pathetically whiny posts).

But there’s another issue, that comes with the adoration for a fictional character…something torturous, heart-wrenching and devastatingly painful: It’s the piteous longing for someone, who will never be mine in real life….a goddamn feeling, which is eating me alive! Of course, I’m still coping with my current situation of being doomed to a life in darkness (fuck you, ME/CFS!!!!!) by writing my own ridiculously self-inserting fan fictions about Sevy and Jules…only for myself…solely to soothe my troubled heart. Furthermore, the many artists of Snapedom might know me as someone, who’s requesting immensely personal artworks for my blog…always using them to emphasise my journal entries here.

But there are times, when this isn’t enough anymore! I’m surrounded by Severus in my dark room… one could say, that I’m living in my private Snape-and-Wizarding-World-in-general-Museum. 😅 Everything here feels like my very own comfort blanket, which I’m pulling tighter around my trembling body to create a sensation of warmth and safety. And yet… yeah… and yet, I’m fucking lonely! Lying in darkness and solitude all day makes this cruel longing for Severus become agonising and almost unbearable. I’m bawling my eyes out for someone, who will never be able to hear my heart crying out for him. And to be honest: In my age, this is a sentiment, which I’m absolutely ashamed of!

For the past 21 years, I’ve known this miserable emotion only in this exact context. But now, something happened, which made the confines of my heart and the walls, I’ve built around myself, shatter into pieces…leaving me vulnerable and emotionally churned up like never before. Becoming close and trusting friends with someone, who’s living so far away from me - separated by the ocean - turns out to be blessing and curse at once.

Suddenly, I feel confronted by the same emotions, which my pining for Severus provokes in my heart…a yearning for a deeper connection - regardless of the relationship’s nature between us friends. And just like in the song, which I’ve mentioned above this text, I’m asking myself: “How can you miss someone, you’ve never met?”

Fortunately, I’m able to reach out to my friend in these occasions. I don’t have to weep over my fan fictions or my art collection…no, I can just grab my phone and annoy the fuck out of my beloved confidant. And I think, this is beautiful! 🥹

For this heartwarming piece of art, I’ve commissioned my friend @alinearthp once again. I asked her to draw Severus and my undeniably self-inserted OC Jules as young adults…going out to grab some butter beer in “The Three Broomsticks”. Whenever my longing for Severus becomes too strong, I’m trying to imagine him doing something casual like that with me…and now I’m doing the same with my long-distance-friend. For this reason, I’d like to dedicate this loving post to him. @preciousthelmadonna, you’re in my heart and in my thoughts every single day, since I got to meet you on tumblr. Despite those 6095 kilometres, which separate us from each other, it seems as if you’re right beside me, whenever we’re talking about everything and nothing at once. I’m beyond grateful for our connection, my love. Thank you for being you.

Oh, and @alinearthp, you made me smile with this cute drawing of Sevy and Jules! Thank you for your understanding of my ideas and for each of your lovely and kind messages! Feel hugged, my dear!

🖤Severus & Julia🖤

🖤Sevy & Jules🖤

[missywritesfor7]

❤️‍🩹Lifeline | MYG❤️‍🩹

Synopsis: It’s long been controversial for idols to date, but idols dating each other can be really beautiful or a complete nightmare. When Yoongi's relationship with another idol is discovered, he decides maybe it’s time to break the taboo and show people it’s ok for idols to date. Instead, they find themselves caught in the midst of one media frenzy after another and struggle to keep their relationship as strong as it had been the past 2 years. Yoongi finds a self destructive way to cope, and it causes even more problems than it solves. As they fight for their relationship and their careers, they discover that sometimes, the only way to truly be free is to let go.

Pairing: idol!Yoongi x idol!OC

Warnings: nsfw, alcoholism, cheating, depression, anxiety, Yoongi goes through a bisexy ho phase, Yoongi is also in his alcoholic phase, post-military BTS

Previous chapter | Next chapter | Masterlist

Ch. 21: Look Up

Hyeri was released from the hospital a day later. Her manager took her home and made sure she had all she needed including a few doses of epinephrine in case she has another allergic reaction.

Minho came by to check on Yoongi that same morning and was relieved to see that he’d been doing just fine. Yoongi seemed brighter than he’d ever been these past two months. Hyeri updated him on everything that was happening and he didn’t feel the need to press or prod her more until he was convinced she was truly ok. He’s just happy to hear from her. He admitted to Minho that forgiving himself is something he may struggle with for awhile, but he’s determined to do so and get back to his normal life.

It was a good light talk, until he began talking about Army. He went back and read more comments on his Weverse post and he couldn’t stop smiling at the love, support, and occasional jokes that were being left by fans. He knew he missed them these past couple of months, but as he was talking to Minho he realized that he misses them more because he barely remembers much of the tour. He was so drunk it’s like he wasn’t there at all. Instead of months, it feels like years since he was truly able to be with and enjoy Army’s presence. It hurts him, but makes him more determined to get back home making music and performing. Talking about Army made him emotional, but going back to read their comments gave him strength.

The next day Yoongi started off with making breakfast as he usually does. He makes himself a cup of coffee then enjoys the breeze outside. He’s gotten used to the peaceful mornings here. As much as he wants to go home, he knows he’ll miss this place. That’s why he’s trying to enjoy the view while he has it. That is until his silence is broken by his phone ringing from a call from Hyeri.

“Hey!” He says answering the call.

“YOONGI OH MY GAWDDD!!!” She shouts into the phone.

“What? What?!” He shouts trying to determine if this is a good call or a bad call.

“I GOT IT BABY I GOT THE PART OHMIGAWWWDDDD!!!”

“You got the part?!” He asks in excitement. “Really??”

“They just called me HOLY SHIT!!” She shouts unable to contain her excitement. “This is HUGE YOONGI I CANT BELIEVE I GOT IT!!”

“That’s amazing! I’m so proud of you my love!”

“It’s so crazy FUCK JJS FOR TRYING TO KEEP ME FROM DOING THIS AUDITION!!” Hyeri laughs then takes a deep breath. “I’m going to play this role so fucking good they’ll wish they had treated me better!”

“You got this, baby!” He encourages. “Just don’t forget me when you get big and famous.”

“Oh stop,” she laughs. “I’ll be lucky to come even close to your level of stardom.”

“Be careful, people may think you’re trying to use me to boost your career,” he jokes.

“Whatever,” she playfully huffs. “They think I’m using Namjoon for my career, remember?”

“Right,” he rolls his eyes. “Your lunch with him had the world going crazy although I’m the one who asked him to do it.” It’s such a stupid thing, but he finds it amusing how the public can turn a simple birthday lunch into confirmation of a relationship.

“Maybe one day I’ll just lose my shit and shout to the world that I’m with you,” she chuckles.

“Oh really? You mean like I wanted to do before when the picture of us was posted?”

“I know I know, don’t start.”

“I’m not.”

“Believe it or not I’ve changed a lot since then.”

“Really? So are you saying you want to reveal our relationship to the public?” He’s intrigued since she fought so hard to keep things a secret. This is the first time she’s suggested they go public.

“Well…” she hesitates. “Yeah, but…maybe after this new drama comes out. I don’t want to be a distraction, you know?”

“I wish I was recording this conversation,” he jokes.

“I mean it,” she laughs. “I want everyone to know. I don’t even care anymore. I’d rather they talk shit about me for the truth rather than talk shit about me and my friends over lies.”

“Na Hyeri? Is that still you?”

“Shut up!” She laughs. “I wish I could throw something at you.”

“Go ahead, I’ll send you my location.”

“You know I can’t stand you, right?”

“I love you too, Bow.”

Their banter continues until Hyeri has to go to a meeting with her agency. She promises to call him when she’s back home and she does just that. Their conversations get longer and more frequent each day. The better Yoongi feels, the more determined he is to get home. He’s trying to not get impatient, but it’s hard when he feels better than ever and he misses her so much.

Minho has been reporting back to management regularly to let them know how he feels about Yoongi’s progress. Everyone is happy to hear how well things are going and even happier when Minho says he recommends allowing Yoongi to finally go home. He’ll continue regular counseling sessions with Yoongi, but isolation is no longer necessary.

Management began making plans to bring Yoongi home and resume activities with the group. They notified all of the members and they were all incredibly excited. They then let Yoongi know he would be going home soon, however they didn’t say when because they wanted to finalize some things. Yoongi isn’t sure what needs to be finalized, but he’s just happy to know he’ll finally be going home.

Two days later Yoongi wakes up in the morning to the sound of someone rustling around in the kitchen. He assumes the manager taking him back decided to make breakfast before they set out on the 5 hour ride back. He lays there a moment longer, checks his phone, then goes into the bathroom to freshen up.

When he steps out of the room and towards the kitchen, he notices the plates of fresh fruit, sliced salmon, and veggies on the counter. Then he realizes the manager whose back is turned toward him isn’t a manager at all.

“Hyeri?” He asks blinking to make sure he’s seeing straight.

“Morning, babe,” Hyeri says turning and smiling. Yoongi may not have been able to tell, but the moment she saw him her heart skipped a beat. She’s missed him and her entire body can feel it.

“What are you doing here?” He asks stepping to her and pulling her into a tight embrace.

“I was just in the neighborhood and decided to stop by,” she jokes returning his squeeze.

“I missed you so much,” he says giving her lips a passionate kiss. He feels like it’s been so long he almost forgot how soft her lips are and how much his heart races when he’s connected to them.

“I missed you too.” She goes in for another kiss, and another, giving him little oxygen.

They can’t take their hands or lips off of one another until the smell of burning sausage reminds Hyeri that she was in the middle of cooking. She quickly turns the stove off and Yoongi helps her dispose of the charred remains. They laugh it off then sit down to eat the rest of the meal she prepared. Yoongi is so excited to show her how beautiful this place is so he insisted that they eat outside where he usually has breakfast.

“When did you get here?” Yoongi asks still feeling like he’s in a dream.

“Last night,” Hyeri giggles.

“Last night? How?? Where??”

“I stayed in a hotel nearby. I wanted to surprise you with breakfast,” she smiles. “I had been thinking of visiting you for a day since everyone said you were doing well, but they said you were coming home so I thought I’d be the one to come pick you up.”

“Pick me up? You drove 5 hours to get here?”

“Yes,” she laughs at the cute and comical disbelief written across his face. “I was able to get in contact with your manager and tell him I wanted to surprise you, so I asked if I could come pick you up, and I asked if maybe I could stay here with you for just one night before we go back.”

“Stay the night?” He perks up with excitement.

“Yeah,” she nods. “We haven’t really had a trip to ourselves like this before. So I thought this may be our only chance for a while. The schedule for my drama is pretty intense and goes at least 4 months. I know you would be working too as soon as you got home so I stole the chance to get some alone time.”

“We could have had two nights if you came when you got here last night,” he playfully pouts.

“You’ll get over it,” she laughs. “This place is really nice though. I’m kind of jealous you’ve been here this whole time while I’ve been stuck in the city.”

“Maybe we could come back one day,” he suggests. “Or maybe a place similar to this one.”

“Can we go somewhere warm with a pool?” She asks excitedly. “I know you don’t like getting wet, but I just love relaxing in the pool on a warm day.”

“We can do whatever you want,” he chuckles. “I’ll sacrifice dryness for you.”

“You’re such a gentleman,” she jokes. “Can you show me around the rest of this place?”

“Sure!” He says all too excited to show her everything he knows she’ll love about this property.

He starts by showing her the rooms throughout the home and where he’d been working on music and reading. He took her out back to the cozy little shaded area where he set up the beanbag chair for rainy days. He would sit under the shaded patio and read or zone out to the sounds of the storm. After showing her the second cabin where the doctor stayed the first couple weeks, he took Hyeri on a walk around the property.

A small path that circles the quarter mile area has been Yoongi’s gym. He had some weights brought in as well, but he always found himself going for a peaceful walk outside. Sometimes he would do multiple laps and simply get lost in his thoughts. Today he’s getting to circle the trail while walking hand in hand with Hyeri. Something they’ve rarely gotten the chance to do.

After their walk, they get comfortable on the living room couch. Hyeri’s legs are laying across Yoongi’s lap while he has one hand on the outside of her thigh and his other wrapped around her waist. He holds on to her as if he’s never felt the presence of anything so precious in his life. He’s overflowing with love.

Hyeri’s long drive and early morning has caught up with her and not long after she gets comfortable snuggled up with Yoongi, she falls sound asleep. Yoongi kisses her forehead and smiles, then closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep as well.

If you ask Yoongi, that’s probably the greatest nap he’s ever taken in his life. When he woke up he felt very refreshed and even more so when he looked down at Hyeri still sleeping against him. He remains still a bit longer so he doesn’t disturb her sleep. If he could he’d never move from that spot with her warmth covering his entire body.

He holds his position a few minutes but he can’t any longer. He has to pee. Pretty bad.

He tries to slowly and gently slide himself from under her without waking her up. It’s not easy and once he pulls his arm from around her, she groans then pulls him back closer. He can’t help but silently laugh, but he really needs to go to the bathroom.

He tries again to slip away this time holding her hand so she won’t be able to lock him in her hold again. He slides his legs from under her and she groans again. He pauses. Stares at her. Then begins sliding away some more.

“No,” Hyeri groans trying to grab him again. He’s trying to block her hand from wrapping around him but she’s fighting, even with her eyes still closed.

“Babe,” Yoongi giggles.

“No,” she groans again. “I’m not done with you.”

“I really need to go to the bathroom,” he says still trying to hold her hand.

“It can wait.”

“I don’t think it can,” he laughs.

“If you can make it through an entire concert then you can make it a few more minutes,” she teases.

“But I don’t make it through an entire concert,” he laughs. “We still have intermissions.”

“Well whatever, you still can’t go yet.”

“Ok then,” he resolves. “I guess I’ll just do my business right here.”

“You better not!” She says finally opening her eyes and playfully pushing him away. “Hurry up.”

“How did you wake up so demanding?” Yoongi laughs standing.

“I could be worse.”

“No thank you,” he laughs walking to the bathroom.

Hyeri smiles and takes a deep breath of relief. She hasn’t felt at ease like this in nearly a year. The day Yoongi left two months ago she could hardly look at him. So much pain would radiate through her when she looked at him. She cried every night blaming herself for how bad things had gotten.

Now she sees a much different person. Yoongi looks much healthier and happier and it makes her so proud. She finally feels like things are truly looking up for once.

This has been one of the toughest times Hyeri has had since Two Piece disbanded. She’s never been in the tabloids so much, she’s never been the subject of controversial things, and she’s never felt like her personal and professional lives were all about to collapse at the same time. Even when she thought things were looking up, something always seemed to come crashing down on her.

It’s not all good though, only much much better than it had been. She spent the better part of the two months trying to make peace with all of the things Yoongi had done and put her through. Forgiving him seemed easy, but an unexpected update regarding his stolen Black card made her realize that saying she forgives him is not the same as actually forgiving him.

Yoongi’s Black card had long since been reported stolen and replaced. There had been no attempts to use it anywhere so it had all been forgotten about by now. However, recently someone finally found the card and it was being held as evidence in a criminal case in California.

Although Yoongi was on civil duty during his enlistment, he chose to stay in Daegu near family during that time where he was assigned to a job there. Though he and Hyeri had only been together for a short time, he made her an authorized user on his Black card so she could get whatever she wanted. She told him time and again that it wasn’t necessary, but he insisted. No matter the situation he wanted to provide for her 100% regardless of whether she was capable of doing so herself or not.

Hyeri never used the card and eventually forgot that she even had access to it, but then she got the call a month ago. Yoongi was unable to be reached since he was limiting his communication with anyone that didn’t already know where he was. This call came from an unknown number so he didn’t answer, but Hyeri did when she got the call. Thinking it was about work she answered only to be greeted by an attorney who needed to discuss details regarding the stolen Black card.

Chelsea, the stranger Yoongi met in LA who robbed him of more than he knows, had been arrested recently in a string of thefts. Turns out she’s become infamous for the number of people she’s stolen from and the identities she’s taken. The night she met Yoongi she had already stolen a few hundred dollars from others that day. By the time she got to him he was already so fucked up that he made himself an easy target.

Aside from his money, Chelsea also stole a watch that Yoongi had bought for himself during the tour. He spent most of the tour drunk so he forgot he even bought the thing. She also took pictures of his license and passport. She has no idea who Yoongi is, but she realized he wasn’t just a traveler named Austin. She didn’t care though because all she saw were dollar signs. Her theft spree continued for months before she finally tried to use Yoongi’s card.

While Chelsea had always been quick to use the new identities and access to money she found in her journey, she hesitated with Yoongi. She wasn’t quite sure how to go about an international theft. She knew nothing about Korean banks, or Korea in general. She decided to do research to make sure she was as educated as possible in order to get away with it, but research takes time. She had stolen plenty of identities after Yoongi so her research didn’t start right away.

Authorities started investigating the string of thefts and Chelsea felt them closing in. She decided to lay low for a while until the heat dies down, but laying low meant losing her main source of income. She became desperate and decided to finally see if she could take her operation overseas just for a few dollars.

Taking Yoongi’s identity was out of the question so she stuck to simply taking his money. She tried to book herself a flight using Yoongi’s card and another stolen identity so it wouldn’t be traced back to her. What she didn’t realize is that Yoongi’s bank had long since been informed of the theft and, because he’s a VIP, they continued to closely monitor his card activity. A transaction coming from an IP address in California was a major red flag.

Unable to get to Yoongi, the attorney on the bank’s legal team detailed everything to Hyeri. She was happy that the thief was caught and will face trial, but she was not happy about why the card was stolen in the first place. She doesn’t know the details of his encounters, she doesn’t want to know, but this situation made her mind wander.

This is someone that was in his hotel room. How many people did he take back to his room? He said it was only blow jobs, but is that truly all it was? Did he kiss her? Did he kiss any of them? He’s always so private, but she was in. his. room.

She has to have a tough conversation with him that she’s been avoiding, and she chose now to finally do it. He’s far from alcohol or any other destructive or otherwise distractive temptations. She needs to talk to him face to face and get answers for the things that have continued to haunt her.

[urfavcoed]

OPEN MIC AT WATERBOMB!

insp. by @venusvity <3 The girls are also mentioned at the end of the post. Feel totally free to have your ocs attend their show or to have OPEN MIC at your oc’s.

🎙️‧₊˚ ⭑.ᐟ ⋅ 𓂃 THE OUTFITS!

— For such a special event, they were given full control over their appearance on stage. So after a week of planning, the members settled on wearing silly shirts and denim for funsies. It was really on brand with the group’s fun and carefree image, so fans went absolutely feral over them.

— Hada’s t-shirt was literally a joke! Like he literally got it made specifically for the festival. It was supposed to stay as a cute memory within the members, but ended up going viral and having to be added to the group’s official merchandise.

🎙️‧₊˚ ⭑.ᐟ ⋅ 𓂃 THE SETLIST

— DINGA

— Suzue’s ment.

"My dear Chanters! Welcome to our show. We’re beyond excited to be here; you guys have no idea. We absolutely love Waterbomb, right?" She turns to her group mates, who nod enthusiastically. Hada and Diwa, already armed with water guns, approach Suzue and aim their guns at her playfully.

"Oh, no. Don't you dare! Not just yet, please. This makeup took forever. See, Chanters? This is what I mean. Waterbomb is always so much fun, and we love having fun in our performances. You guys were the loudest crowd last year, but I expect you to top that today. We will too, promise! If you know this next song, sing along. It's SOUR CANDY! So sweet, then I get a little angry." She giggles cutely as the music kicks in.

— SOUR CANDY

— Diwa’s ment.

"Yass, I love this song! How’s it going, Waterbomb?" The crowd roars back. "Sounds like you’re having a blast. Today’s show is packed with surprises. I don’t want to give too much away, but I might just…spit it out." Diwa pauses, giving a cheeky grin like she's up to no good. "I could really use some backup vocals, Chanters, so everyone sing along!"

— SPIT IT OUT! Diwa’s solo

— River’s ment.

"Yo, Waterbomb! How was Diwa’s performance? I'd say she fucking killed it!" The crowd screams in agreement, and Diwa takes a dramatic bow before running to one of the big water guns on stage. "Man, I don't know if I can top that. But I hope you guys will help me out too. I've been thinking about how to make this performance unforgettable. What if we...record a TikTok together? Hey Suzue! Bring your phone." Suzue briefly leaves the stage and returns with a phone in hand. After a couple of minutes of prep, everything is set to record. "Alright, let’s do this, Chanters. This is ANY SONG? I hope you know the dance!"

— ANY SONG? River’s solo

— WORK

— Hada’s ment.

"Chanters… We’re nearing the end of this amazing day. It’s been a pleasure to be here with you. I hope you’ve had as much fun as we have, you guys are the best crowd anyone could ask for. Really! We’ve got one more song for you. It’s my favorite from our latest mini album and it’s super special to me because Diwa and I wrote it together. Please, Chanters, sing as loud as you can with us. This is TASTE TEST!"

— TASTE TEST

🎙️‧₊˚ ⭑.ᐟ ⋅ 𓂃 THE SHOW!

— OPEN MIC’s third Waterbomb! The hype was real, guys! Everyone was crossing their fingers for the group to be confirmed for Waterbomb Seoul. When it finally happened, fans lost it.

— Usually, OPEN MIC is known for their epic live shows. It's so much fun seeing the members doing their thing on stage and having a great time, hitting every note flawlessly. But let me tell you, Waterbomb was on another level!

— For the setlist, they chose all of their forever fan favorite tracks together with their most recent trendy songs like TASTE TEST, featured in their last mini album.

— From all of the member’s solo songs featured in both their mini albums and OPEN MIC PARTY series, only two of them were chosen to be performed. Fans were a tad upset about Suzue and Hada not performing one of their songs, specially Hada’s </3 GIRL, a fan favorite.

— Diwa’s choice of song was also…unexpected! Everyone was expecting her to perform her latest solo release, GOOD LUCK XO, which was even trending on TikTok at the moment. Our girl did not speak a word about the reason behind the decision, which made everything even weirder!

— Two words: blonde River. Long-haired blond River, actually. Which is even better, if you ask me. It was so unexpected, given the fact that he likes to keep his hair natural or in some dark color. So yeah, his choice for the festival was not on people’s year bingo cards. But everyone went crazy over it!

— River recorded a TikTok while performing his solo ANY SONG?, doing its little trendy choreography with the crowd behind him all while Hada soaked him with one of the big water guns.

— This little trip down memory lane resulted in the song re-entering the charts at #4, and Chanters bringing back the trend with a new twist under the hashtag #ANYSONGSummerEdition.

— After their show, the group was spotted in the crowd at WayV, Taemin and Venus’s shows. Diwa and Suzue also went to see Nayeon, while River and Hada popped up by Loco’s show.

— They took over Instagram with pics and vids from the shows plus then just genuinely having a good time, singing and dancing along to their favorite artists. One of Suzue’s clips of Ten from WayV went viral, and now it’s one of the most used fancams on Twitter.

🎙️‧₊˚ ⭑.ᐟ ⋅ 𓂃 THE STILLS!

from left to right: Diwa, River, Hada & Suzue!

[fuck-you-upmusicbracket]

Question (Assasination Classroom)

I get knocked down like this every time/Your scathing, serious voice cuts me/Thousands, tens of thousands of times I’ve given form to my feelings/Driven them in, thrown them in— but all you do is run away/What on earth did I ever know about you anyway?/Why is it that you’re so close and yet so far away?

"Augh firstly the context of this being the 3rd op for assclass. the tone shift compared to the first two openings. even just the instrumentation makes me cry. KOROSENSEI. also secondly, the lyrics touching on feeling so strongly about someone who never seems to acknowledge you. it makes you question why you even felt this way in the first place. why are they so distant? why won’t they acknowledge what you’ve done? what you’ve said? while the phrasing can sorta seem like it leans romantic, it’s really not about that at all, shown by the relationships that flash by during the question questions. irina and karasuma, the gods of death— prodigy and master, asano jr and asano sr. then korosensei standing in the zebra grass field where he tells his past followed by everything replaying and the faces of his students flashing by. all so close and yet so far away, did i ever know anything about you? i like how question, question, is phrased as if a reporter asking a question at a press release, or a student asking a question in class. i’m insane"

Anatomy of a Car Crash (Too Small the Limelight)

In ink, we'll write a tragedy/with players star-crossed and you'll read/about it late at night, and cry yourself to sleep/in fiction, lies push conflict/but in real life all they push are people to the edge/a teeter on the ledge forcing myself to stop there but the bridge of this song makes me insane and then it flows so well into the last chorus and and and

not only is it a song about some nonspecific great tragedy, and it feels like it was tailored exactly to my tastes (seriously everything from the instrumental to the vocals to the lyrics is just PERFECT to me) but also it is SO OBSCURE. NOBODY ELSE KNOWS ABOUT IT. It was made by a (from what i can tell then relatively popular, but now Pretty Obscure) furry musician over a decade ago and im like. this guys most dedicated fan. Its not on any streaming services or even bandcamp i had to go digging through the internet to find a download link to the album its on. The lyrics arent anywhere so i had to try to transcribe them myself. but this song is SO GOOD and i. hrgrhrgr. song that makes me explode. and oc havers take heed because this song is so blorbo-able I guarantee i will be the only person to submit this song (unless one of my friends does or something) but im asking so politely. this song and the guy who made it HIGHLY deserve more recognition

[theshynerdsworld]

THE MUSE part 6

Benedict Bridgerton x female oc

——-

Mary stood looking in the mirror at her dress, it was light blue with little embroidered flowers “I don’t know…” she whispered “Mary, we’ve tried nearly everything,.” Greta told her “hand me to grey lavender, again.” Mary took it off and took the dress, putting it on and put her head to the side “ok. This one.” Greta buttoned it up and helped Mary down from the little stage, Mary grabbed her shoes and bag. Then sat at her makeup table, putting on some light make up “do you think, he will propose?” Greta asked, sitting down and Mary looked her “I’m not sure..” she whispered “I plan to ask him to sleep with me, if I’m married off to another man.” Mary said as a matter of fact “I don’t care, if I sound like a whore, Greta. I deserve to have some pleasure in life..”

Greta sighed and said “Miss, that’s not right..”, “why can’t I have a little pleasure before I’m sold away..” she whispered, Greta gave her a disappointing look “knowing him, probably would.” Mary put her earrings in then nodded standing up The two got up and made their way downstairs when she stopped, seeing Benedict and his brothers, Anthony, Colin and Gregory “Benedict, I thought we were meeting there.” She said after coming down the stairs “well.. we passing by.” She looked at Greta and then Benedict “of course. We should go.”, “shouldn’t we tell your aunt and grandparents.” Colin said, concerned “Johnathon, can tell them.” Mary was out the door “thanks John!”, “I’m gonna make you pay me back, I swear.”

Benedict helped her in and Greta aswell, then the men got in “I like your dress”, “oh thank you, Gregory.” The ride was quiet, the boys mainly spoke. Gregory asked “how do you feel about ducks?”, “ducks?” She asked confused “it’s just I’m going to be feeding them with my sister, hyacinth and well, maybe if you and Benedict are nearby, I was just wondering what you thought”, “um.. well, their ok.. I like animals.” Gregory nodded and looked out the window, making Anthony do a tiny laugh “so where did you go to school?” Colin asked, making Mary look at him “well, I went to sister Margaret’s grammar for girls. It was ok..”, “do well?” Colin started to quiz her, Benedict and Anthony gave him a warning look “well enough…”, “hmm.. so..” Gregory interrupted and said “oh, look we are here.” The men got out and Benedict helped out Mary and Greta “it’s warm today.” Mary stated, as they linked arms and Greta pulled out her fan “you left it.”

Mary thanked her and fanned herself as they walked with Colin and Greta behind them “is it weird?”, “what?” Benedict asked, as they walked “this.. you are known as the Bridgerton, who does not date.” Benedict thought and said “your an expectation.” He paused then said “I asked my brother.. Anthony to be the second for the painting.”, “your brother.. I could not find anyone on such sort notice.” He whispered, as they greeted someone walking past “not Colin?” He shook his head “ok.. sure.”, “you will need a light purple dress, like the one you wore to our second session, I’ll provide the masks.” She nodded “ok..”, “do you want lemonade?” He asked, as they sat. Colin huffed alittle as he sat near Greta. Mary nodded “please.” Benedict stood up and said “Greta, lemonade?”, “thank you sir, of course.” He nodded “come on col.”

The two walked off as Greta sat down, next to Mary to keep her company “so col, why the questions?” Colin scoffed alittle “to know, her. We don’t know anything about her, Ben.” He said all hush hush “I know her.”, “yes because you fucking her.” As they stood in line, he shushed Colin “we are not. So don’t, even.. four lemonades please.” The man nodded and got to work, as the brothers discussed “I hope you know what you’re doing.” Colin said grabbing two cup and so did Benedict “im just saying, the family can’t afford a scandal.” Colin snapped silently “at least I know her, unlike your engagement.”, “that’s not fair.” Col glared “neither is attacking Mary.” The two got closer “here we go ladies. Refreshing lemonade.” They thanked the men and sipped, as Mary fanned herself “are you ok?”, “I don’t well in heat…” just then hyacinth came running “mama said food is ready, if you want to join.”, “actually Col will be joining you. I have a surprise set up for me and miss frantic, obviously greta will be joining.” Colin went to protest but Benedict stopped him, as he helped up Mary and greta followed “so what is this surprise?” She wondered outloud. Colin shook his head and walked to the family “mother, you cannot allow this.”, “I helped him set it up. Anthony! Stop annoying your sister.” Violet snapped and sat down “now eat.” She snapped.

As the trio ate, Benedict looked at her and cleared his throat “I have a question.” She raised her eyebrow “so ominous.” She giggled then drank her lemonade, greta listened as she ate “tomorrow, is the races and I was wondered if you wanted to attend in our box.” Mary nodded and thought, then replied “I am going with my family but maybe I could persuade them, I will try.” He smiled as got closer, Mary looked at him “I have an invitation for you, your brothers, aunt and grandparents.” He pulled out an envelope and she raised her eyebrow, as she took it, looking around and opened it “money?” She whispered, as he sipped his drink “yes, I owe you for a session.” She placed it in her bag and whispered “you paid me.”, “did I?” He said innocently and she glared at him playfully, and took the last strawberry “huh. The last strawberrry? How dare you.” Greta watched the two, playfully argue and she shook her head ‘young love’ she thought and sighed softly, taking in the sun.

(Sorry it’s late, I haven’t been feeling it and tbh I’m making this up as I go along, I’m also trying to figure out how to make a master list for the series. Any suggestions for the story? Enjoy!)

[mrsaltieri-real]

His Perfect Victim (Mickey Altieri X OC!Dahlia Levine)

Chapter Seventeen: Three Little Words

Words: 4.7k

Warnings: language, angst, smut, first time, fingering, multiple orgasm, teasing, praise, dirty talk, riding, spit, biting, nipple play, arguing, gaslighting, a little fluff.

A/N: WE’RE FINALLY HERE FOLKS! The long awaited smut chapter, but with a twist at the end. This one has feeling, I felt so much writing it. Next few chapters are going to be rather intense, after that it’s borderline smut and then we’re pretty much at the end! Can’t believe how fast this is going but it’s just so much fun! Let me know what you guys think and I hope you enjoy!

Thank you to @bisexual-horror-fan for editing and beta reading. You’re really my rock and are helping me get through this so much! I wouldn’t have gotten this far if it wasn’t for your constant encouragement and help!

@lizey-thornberry

(Here’s a moodboard for Dahlia I made a while back that I completely forgot about!)

Campus was almost completely deserted, most people had gone to visit their families at the end of the semester. Randy offered again for me to go with him, saying his parents wouldn’t mind if I wanted to stay, but I told him no, there were things I needed to sort out here.

I’d been avoiding Mickey like he was the fucking plague, and he’d noticed fairly quickly.

I’d cancel plans, tell him I was under the weather, which wasn’t really a lie. Not only that, but I felt sick to my fucking stomach every time I thought about talking to him, having to undoubtedly lie to his face.

Lexi’s words played on my mind nonstop. “He isn't okay, there’s something dark about him, be careful.” It was driving me crazy. When I did see him, I found myself cautious and on edge for weeks. The sinking feeling was coming back and this time, it was more painful than ever.

The feeling that something bad was coming was one I could not shake. Every time he looked at me, I could tell he knew something was wrong, and I knew it bothered him that whenever he asked I would tell him it was nothing, I was just tired, I’d just had a long and busy day. It didn’t help that the few weeks till the next semester had raced to an end, and I’d hardly spoken to him.

About a month into break, my door was practically being hammered off its hinges and I groaned, mumbling out, “Fuck off,” at the noise, pulling my blanket over my head, but it didn’t stop, just grew angrier and more persistent. I forced myself out of bed and dragged myself to the door, pulling it open ready to shout at whoever it was.

Mickey looked furious. Angrier than I’d ever seen him before.

“So, you met Lexi?” He all but spat the words, glaring down at me.

I froze, still half asleep and a little dazed. His eyes were on fire, his hand gripping the door frame so hard it’s a wonder he didn’t splinter the wood.

“I don’t-“

“Don’t fucking lie to me, Dahlia.” His voice was sharp, instantly waking me up, and I took him in properly. I’d never seen this in him before. His eyes were burning, his jaw set rigid and tight as his stare blazed down at me. Mickey was always tall, but now it felt he was towering ten feet above me, and it took everything inside of me to not cower away like a kicked dog.

How the hell could he possibly know?

I asked him as much, voice small and my eyes refusing to meet him. He held a small piece of paper up to me as he walked past me into my dorm before snatching it away before I could see what it said.

“I got a note under my door this morning. What the hell is wrong with you?”

This caught my attention. My head snapped in his direction and I felt myself getting angry with him. “What’s wrong with me? Maybe I should be the one asking you that.”

He scoffed, turning on his heel to face me. “And what the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

I bit the inside of my cheek, glaring back at him with my arms tightly crossed across my chest.

“Oh, did she tell you some things about me? What an awful, awful person I am? How much I ruined her life? Did it never occur to you that she’s nothing more than a spiteful bitch who wants nothing more than to ruin whatever happiness I have because I couldn’t find it with her?” I could see his anger gradually begin to fade and twist into something different, something I couldn’t quite put my finger on.

“She just…” I trailed off. Looking at him now, looking at Mickey, made me feel different. He looked almost sad, but that sadness was something I’d later find out to be nothing but a show. He knew he was a bad person, and he knew what he’d done. “-told me to be careful.”

His brow furrowed in confusion before he sighed, walking past me and sitting down on my bed, putting his head in his hands. “Right. I’m sure she did.”

Something in my mind told me to protect her, not tell him what was really said. That thought came too late, but I decided to attempt altering the truth. Not just for Lexi, not just for me, but for him too. I had to do the one thing I hated doing most in the world. I had to lie.

“I didn’t listen to her.” I said as smoothly as I could. “I know you. You’re a good person, Mickey.”

“Why did she come? How did she find you?”

“I didn’t ask.” I lied again, moving to kneel in front of him. His hands were shaking, I took them gently in mine. He felt ice-cold and burning hot at the same time. “I just told her to leave.” I didn’t see the point in mentioning this Debbie person to him. What would it achieve? It would just give Mickey another person to be angry about, and seeing him angry sent a cold feeling of dread crawling across my skin.

“Fuck, you don’t actually expect me to believe that, do you? My ex-girlfriend knocks on your fucking door, and you just told her to leave? Don’t treat me like I’m that fucking stupid.”

The venom in his voice would have made me flinch a year ago. But now, it just pissed me off.

“Oh, right! Yes. My mistake, Mickey. I forgot everything fucking revolves around you! Jesus Christ, what the hell is your problem?” I shouted the words at him bitterly, moving to my feet. This time, I was looking down at him, my hands curled into fists and my nails biting into my palms.

“I fucking-“ Mickey cut himself off, and I could see in his face he was trying to search for the right words, “It wasn’t a good relationship, Dahlia. But I’m not that person anymore. So whether you talked to her or not, don’t tell me. I could give less of a shit. But if you did, that guy she told you about wasn’t me.”

I didn’t say anything. I crossed my arms across my chest, turning my head to focus my glare out of my window.

“What? What are you thinking?” He asked. I could feel him staring at the side of my face intently, but I ignored his gaze.

“That now you’re lying to me.”

I felt his eyes boring into me further, but I continued to ignore it, focusing on the soft waving of a tree branch outside instead. It kept me grounded and calm, making it easier to have this conversation with him.

“I have never hurt you, Dahlia.” His voice was too calm, it unsettled me.

“Yeah, you did. When I didn’t kiss you at that party, and you fucked that girl right in front of me-“

“Oh, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” He shouted this time, throwing his hands in the air, making me jump and my arms curl around myself, focusing more intently on the tree branch eyebrows creased with worry while I fought the urge to close my eyes and shy away from him.

“That was practically a year ago, Dahlia! We weren’t dating, fuck, we weren’t even friends!”

“I know but I- I fucking… Cared.” I struggled with my words, still not wanting to look at him. I knew if I did, I would break. “I wasn’t okay back then. In a lot of ways, I’m still not. You were the first real person I’d met here, and it just showed me that if I even upset you the slightest bit, you can just turn, Mickey! I’m terrified every single day that we’ll fight, and you’ll do something like that again! I wouldn’t be able to handle it, Mickey!”

“You’re… You’re scared of me?” His voice was smaller, pretty much unfamiliar. If he wasn’t sitting right in front of me, I would have assumed it wasn’t him speaking at all.

The words were hard to put together, they felt heavy and difficult on my tongue, but I told him with surprising clarity and confidence, “No, I’m not scared of you. I’m scared of the things you could do.”

“Dahlia, you’re talking like I cheated on you or something. I didn’t. Okay, I admit, I was trying to get a rise outta you and yes, I did just want to see how far I could push you but… Dahli, I don’t think you know just how much I care about you.”

His words were so intense, so real, I could feel tears stinging my eyes and threaten to spill. I squeezed my eyes shut, shaking my head and sniffled once. “Come here.” He said, voice softening.

“No.” I don’t say it with any conviction whatsoever.

He laughed once, standing up and walking to me. I felt his hand circle my wrist and pull me to his chest, his arms wrapping around my waist like a vice. I buried my face into his chest, fingers clinging to the soft material of his grey sweatshirt.

“You mean everything to me.” I mumbled into the material, unable to stop myself.

He pulled back just a touch to look down at my face, the smile I loved creeping onto his face. His eyes met mine and I could instantly tell he believed me.

“Really?” He asked. I could see the hint of hesitation in his eyes. It made me smile. I always saw Mickey as a confident person but maybe in his own way, he was insecure too. I watched the relief on his face as I nodded my head.

“I’m sorry for coming in like that. You just… You’ve hardly spoken to me in weeks, and when you do, it’s like your mind is somewhere else entirely. Then I found out about Lexi and I just.. just made an assumption. I’m sorry, baby.” He spoke softly, much more sweet, calm but not unjustly so. It fits the current moment much more.

The thing is, I wasn’t nearly as convincing as I thought. Mickey knew I was lying. I found out a few years later that Lexi Castro had been reported missing in mind to late 1997. The dates added up to when she’d come to Windsor and warned me off of Mickey, and it explained why I never heard from her again, especially after… Everything.

“It’s okay, baby.” My hand cupped his cheek, my thumb gently grazing under his eye. “Mickey, you know there isn’t anything you could do to scare me away, right?”

He scoffed, lips turning up a little for a second as he placed his hand over mine, our fingers twisting together as he pulled me back toward my bed and sat down. “Don’t say things you don’t mean.”

What surprised me is that I wasn’t trying to convince him of it. Regardless of what Lexi had told me, I wasn’t scared of him. Not my Mickey. His rapid change from furious to loving was enough to give anyone whiplash. Maybe I was still so broken inside I genuinely couldn’t tell that he wasn’t a good person. Or maybe I knew, but I simply didn’t care. One of the things I learned during my relationship with Mickey is that love can make you really fucking stupid.

“I’ve been thinking about Stu a lot lately.” I told him, trying to change the subject away from Lexi as swiftly as I could. “Wondering why he did what he did. Then I realized, he cared for Billy so much he would’ve and did anything for him, even the very worst thing you could possibly do.”

Mickey looked confused as I spoke, watching as I stood up and straddled him, my hands gently touching the base of his neck. “I couldn’t imagine caring about somebody like that, not before. Then I realized I would do anything for you.”

His face entirely softened, his finger grazing my healed over scar once before his hands settled on my waist.

“He told me once to wait for the right person because when I do, it’ll be worth it. I never thought I would meet anyone, that I was being stupid by putting it off.”

“Dahl, what are you-“ I placed my hand over his mouth quickly, shaking my head.

“I want to.” I insisted, taking my hand away from his mouth and pressing my lips against his instead.

I could feel his hesitation through his kiss, almost as though he wasn’t quite sure what to do with himself. His hands gripped my upper arms, keeping me at somewhat of a distance. “Are you trying to change the subject?”

“Depends on if it’s working.” I said with a half smile. I felt his grip relax, allowing me to pull myself closer to him, my hand locking behind his neck.

He really was beautiful. He seemed more keen now, hands gripping my ass and making me roll my hips down against him. The sensation made me let out a small moan into his mouth, which only prompted him to do it again. His lips were soft, careful. Too careful. I couldn’t help but think of how Lexi had described him. Intense, angry, violent. With how tender and gentle he was being, it was hard to imagine him being that way with anybody.

I needed this, I needed him. I pressed myself closer to him, fingers twisting in his hair and he chucked against my lips, hands sliding up my shirt and his fingers dancing across my back. So gentle. But I didn’t fucking want gentle.

“I’m not glass.” I mumbled, pulling back just slightly. He cocked an eyebrow at me, brown eyes curious before he said gently, “Dahli, it’s your first time. Don’t worry, I’ve got all the time in the world to fuck you like a whore.”

His words made me blush, which he relished deeply. He looked proud of himself, moving his fingers to my face to touch my pink cheeks. “Mm.” He murmured under his breath. I didn’t bother to ask him what.

I kissed him again, not pulling away this time. It was like I couldn’t.

My first time with Mickey was indescribable. It didn’t hurt anywhere near as much as I had built up in my head over the years, but that was due to him. He was so careful and so gentle with me, but not because he thought I’d break. I was still prone to panic attacks, so when he looked into my eyes, when he told me that I was beautiful as he pulled me under him, he was all I could focus on. How he looked, how he smelt, how he felt.

His fingers worked over me for a while, his lips dancing from my lips to my cheeks to my throat as he prepared me. He smiled his dimpled smile as he touched my bare pussy, and I jolted as he made a comment about how ready I was for him that turned me on to no end. I was. I don’t know if the fight had simply turned me on, or if it all just genuinely felt right, but I didn’t care. I could feel him against my bare thigh, so hot and hard.

It just made me fucking hungry for him.

I tugged impatiently at his pants, making him scoff affectionately as he helped me tug them off. “Are you sure?” He asked me for the final time.

“I am so sure.” I said softly, moving my hand up to cup his cheek.

“How bad do you want it?” He asked. His fingers continued circling my clit, determined to make me as wet as possible. I writhed beneath him, pushing myself against the pads of his fingers pathetically, practically preening as I felt them plunge inside of me and begin to curl gently. “Tell me how bad you want it, Dahlia.”

“S-so bad. So fucking bad. Please…” I whined, I begged, already a squirming mess under his skilled hands. He removed his fingers from my hole, forcing them into my mouth and ordered me to, “Suck,” to which I obeyed, tasting myself and sucking my slickness off of his long fingers. He watched my face as I did, favouring my lips as I suckled and swirled my tongue around his digits, looking him in the eye.

“Mm. You taste good, don’t you, honey?” He asked, dragging his fingers away from my tongue to smear my own saliva and wetness across my lips and chin. I sucked in the air, unable to look away from his eyes.

“Not as good as you.”

Mickey rolled his eyes affectionately, pulling me under him more securely. He reached between our bodies, pumping his cock a few times before he settled it gently in my throbbing hole.

He pushed himself into me slowly, carefully watching my face as I flinched and adjusted myself, working past the initial uncomfortableness. I could see that his expression didn’t really change at my pain, more that he somewhat revelled in it, but I didn’t let my mind play on that. Once it subdued, it quickly started to feel good. Really fucking good. My eyes fluttered closed, and I arched my back off the bed as his hand slid down my body, his fingertips lingering for just a moment over my scar to toy with my clit as he carefully rolled his hips.

“So fucking tight, Jesus.” He groaned under his breath, his head dropping to kiss my shoulder. I gasped in response as his hips snapped a touch harder, his fingers adding more pressure onto my clit. His other hand was roaming, palming my bare tit and twisting my nipples gently. “This is the only cock you’re ever going to have, understand?” I moaned, nodding dumbly and tugged at his hair with my fingers. I needed more. I needed him to really fuck me.

He ducked his head, teeth sinking into my nipple sharply. I felt my body twitch, the feeling sending a shoot of arousal straight to my pussy as I gasped when he pulled away. I felt my cunt clench around him as I let out a whimper into his ear, my legs wrapping around his waist securely, pulling my body impossibly closer to his as I pushed myself against him, my nails digging into his toned back and making him groan softly and begin to fuck me a little harder, registering I was more comfortable.

I knew Mickey was good. Too good. We’d done pretty much everything else before, but this was something else entirely. So much more intimate, and I’d never felt closer to anybody in my life. I felt so beautifully full, I’d never felt this stretched to capacity and content before, like he was a missing piece of me, and he’d snapped the final part of the puzzle into place.

I felt complete.

He lifted his head to look at me, his hand moving to grip my hair tightly, forcing me to look into his eyes. “Such a good girl, aren’t you? Taking me so, so well in your nasty little virgin cunt.” He praised me, degraded me, bending to kiss my lips again, to which I eagerly returned. It was a mess of spit and tongues and teeth, moans and sighs, but I never wanted this to stop.

I couldn’t help myself, I splayed my hand on his chest, pushing him onto his back and straddling him, connecting my lips with his as soon as I was on top of him. It took him by surprise, a muffled laugh falling from him as he let out a soft grunt, his arms wrapping around my waist. His fingers dug into my hips before he dragged them to my ass, squeezing the flesh harshly as he began to slowly thrust up into me. I placed mine onto his shoulders, steadying myself on top of him. Fuck, I could really feel him like this. I tentatively ground my hips down, hearing and soaking in the gentle groans falling from his lips as he watched me on top of him before his eye fell to my face again.

I slid my hands to his chest, my nails digging into his soft skin as our movements synchronized. I could feel him throbbing, achingly hard inside of me as my cunt clenched around him, wanting nothing more than to feel him finally cum inside of me. He was like a drug, I couldn’t get enough of him.

Mickey easily switched me back beneath him again, pushing his hand on my inner thigh to already my legs wider for him. “This is for you, not for me.” He insisted as I opened my mouth to dispute the change. I shut my mouth, fingers trailing his jaw as I watched him work over me. From the stories I’d heard about him, I assumed for the longest time that although spectacular at fucking, he was always quite selfish. I wasn’t picking up on that at all.

His hipbone was rubbing against my clit and I could feel the burning sensation in my stomach begin to boil. It felt better than I could have imagined, the combination of my clit being stimulated at his cock making me clench around him with every push, every thrust sent me into an orgasm so intense, he had to pin my body down by my hip. My back arched off the bed as I cried out his name, teeth biting into the flesh of his shoulder, which made him curse softly and his cock twitch.

There wasn’t much talking, I think we were both too lost in the moment. He fucked me through my orgasm, his pace picking up considerably. I knew he was close, that he was holding out for me. He’d told me countless times that when he fucked me for the first time, he was going to ensure that I had, cum all over his cock more times than I could handle, and the thought had made me both embarrassed and unbearably horny. But I didn’t care, I wanted to feel him cum. I craved it intensely.

“Want you to cum.” I gasped out and Mickey looked down at me again, that devastating smile on his face mixed with nothing short of contempt.

“You do?” He asked, voice teasing and light, albeit a little shaky. He was holding back, not wanting to until he’d lived up to his promise. “Now? Why?”

“I want to feel it.” I could hear that my voice sounded a little whiny, but I didn’t care, desperately pulling my body as close to his as I could. At that point, he was practically lifting me up, my ass hardly touching the soft mattress. There was nothing I wanted more than to feel Mickey’s cum cost me from the inside, feel his hot mess completely claim me as his and his alone.

“Oh, you want to feel me cum inside you, is that it? Dirty bitch, you want me to mark my territory?” He bit down on my neck, making me hiss softly, the feeling sending a spasm of arousal to my already hungry cunt before his tongue lapped over the crescent teeth marks he left behind. “Mark my territory, hm?” His voice didn’t have any humour, it was dripping with arousal, just like his eyes. I couldn’t reply, I just mumbled something dumbly at him, focused on his words and now fucking good he was making me feel. When I opened my eyes, he was looking at me like I was a slut, a piece of meat. And I really fucking liked it.

That was until a few minutes later, when I said the most stupid thing you could possibly imagine.

I could feel his cock pulsing and throbbing erratically, could feel the now familiar butterflies begin to flutter in my stomach. I could feel that he was close, his breathing had become more unsteady, his hips began to stutter slightly and his grip on my waist became so tight I had no doubt it would leave bruises. He began fucking me slow and deep, his forehead pressed against mine and so completely connected with him being so passionate, it just felt right.

He moved to kiss me again, so gently and carefully, and when he pulled back I said those three little words. Those three stupid fucking words.

“I- I love you.” I moaned, surely enough, looking into his soft brown eyes.

And what did Mickey say? Absolutely nothing.

He acted as though he didn’t hear it, but I had no doubt that he did. He’d paused for a split second, not looking at me but more at the space above my head before his hand moved toward the back of my knee, pulling it up and sending a new sensation through my body as he began to touch a new place I didn’t know existed, the head of his cock pushing firmly on the spongy tissue again and again, building up a harder and faster rhythm than before, burying his face into my neck. Not only that, but he began kissing it gently as he rhythmically rolled his hips. As good as he felt, I could help a stray tear from falling as I registered what I’d said to him during the most vulnerable state I could have possibly been in, and the fact he couldn’t return it.

He fucked me, he made me cum again at the same time he did. The feeling of him filling me, coating my walls, branding me and his before I felt him leaking out of my cunt was hot, it was satisfying in a way I could begin to describe but at the same time, it didn’t feel right at all.

He didn’t say anything.

I felt stupid, unbelievably embarrassed. I could hardly look at him as he pulled out of me and fell onto his back with a sigh, his eyes focused on the ceiling. I just wrapped myself into my blanket, rolled onto my side and squeezed my eyes closed.

Why did I say it, why did I say it, why did I say it?

Of all times to tell someone you love them for the first time, I couldn’t have picked a worse moment.

“I, uh, I have to-“

“No, yeah. Go.” I managed to keep my voice even, surprising myself. I felt him stand up from the bed, and heard the rustling of his clothes as he got dressed before he headed for my bathroom. I lay there, wanting the ground to open up and swallow me whole.

He emerged a few minutes later with a towel and a glass of water, placing the glass on my bedside table and the towel beside me. He squatted down, placing his hand on my face.

I didn’t look at him. I couldn’t. I focused on watching the condensation drip down the outside of the glass as I could feel Mickey pondering on what he should say.

“I do… You know.” He said softly, pushing my hair out of my face. I saw from the corner of my eye that he immediately frowned when he felt the moisture on his fingers, and he sighed deeply, his eyes closing for a few seconds before opening again. “I just… I can’t say it back. I’ve never said… That to anybody before.”

“It’s fine, Mickey.” I mumbled. I wasn’t angry that he didn’t say it back, I was angry that I had said it before either of us were ready. I knew how I felt about him, but it wasn’t the time or place. And him not being able to say it back made me feel painfully aware that he and I may not be in the same place in our relationship.

That is what hurts.

“Maybe one day I’ll be able to tell you.”

I didn’t reply, closing my eyes tightly. He took that as his cue, leaning forward and kissing my hairline softly. He lingered a little longer than necessary, almost making me open my eyes to check he was okay, before he pulled back sharply, straightening up and leaving my room without saying goodbye.

Maybe one day I’ll be able to tell you.

[little-miss-moonstone]

The Red Thread (Carmy x OC)

Chapter Two | Somewhere Between

Previous | Next | Series Master List

Summery: After Natalie begs Rori to help with some paperwork at the restaurant, Rori and Carmy come to an agreement.

WARNING: Anxiety, blood, almost vomit?, brief mention of past depression, very little editing. I think that’s all, once again just let me know if something needs to be added :)

Fear consumed Carmen as he watched Rori lying on the floor of the kitchen blood pooling by her side. She was struggling to breathe almost like she was drowning. He could hear everyone around him panicking, Sugar screaming for someone to call 911. It seemed like everything was happening in slow motion around the two of them. He didn’t notice when, but he was now on his knees by her side holding her hand as the blood soaked into his jeans.

“Help me, Carmy. Please, help me,” She begged.

He tried using a rag to apply pressure to the wound and the sound of her wincing through sobs broke something deep within him. How could this be happening? Hadn’t they all been through enough? Her whispering for help was all he could hear as he stared into her eyes, praying they didn’t close for good. He leaned in, noticing an orange glow in her irises. He wondered if that was what happened when someone was dying. He leaned in closer than before to see the reflection of fire dancing in her eyes, and the moment he turned around the fire alarm was blaring.

“Fuck!” Carmen cursed as he woke to realize he had almost set his apartment on fire. He opened the window while using the fire extinguisher to put out the blaze on his stove. He began fanning the smoke out the window and the alarm soon stopped. He sat on his couch with a glass of water seeing it was 1:30 in the morning. His breathing was starting to slow down from his actual nightmare and the one in his kitchen, glancing over to the journal on the coffee table, he leaned forward to grab it. He flipped it open, studying the polaroid that lay inside. He and Rori from Christmas 2018, or from what they called it, Fishmas. It was a candid shot neither of them had known was taken until Mikey had given it to him at the end of the night. The two of them were standing in front of the pantry, she had just arrived and greeted him with a hug. She pulled back and he said something that had made her laugh, his arm was still around her waist and she had put a hand on his chest as she smiled. If any stranger saw the photo they would have thought the two were a couple. He admired the picture for a few more seconds before putting it back and flipping to a blank page when his pen acted as a bookmark.

Dear Rori,

I saw you today for the first time in 3 years. You took my breath away, but you’ve never had that problem. I didn’t know what to do, or say, I thought I would never see, or hear from you again. That is my fault, I know, but I couldn’t risk you leaving me. I wish I never shut you out, you were all I ever truly had that was mine. You could have actually been mine and I ruined that too. I miss you, I miss you more than I ever thought was possible, and it's weird now because you're here and I saw you, but I still miss you. I guess that's because nothing’s changed and yet everything has changed. I used to know everything about you, your favorite song, color, flower. How you always prefer waffles to pancakes and when pinks and blues paint the sky at sunset. You’re scared of the dark and you can't sleep on the side of the bed closest to the door and the TV has to stay on. You adore dogs and you used to cry when we would pass the animal shelter. You hate summer and when Mikey and Richie would pin you down and tickle you and these days I would assume you hate me too, and I can't even blame you for it. I want to fix this, I want us to at least be friends because I can't imagine that you still love me, and I can’t stand for you to haunt another one of my dreams.

Yours forever,

Carmy

He closed the journal and moved it back to its spot on the coffee table, before lying back down on the couch and letting the TV lull him back to sleep.

Natalie invited Rori over to her house for breakfast in hopes of guilting her into helping find the missing tax forms at the restaurant. Rori almost choked on a piece of French toast at the idea of being around Carmy. She tried to voice her opinion but Sugar began to ramble on.

“No, Rori I need some help, and if it's you that helps then Carmen can run the kitchen so he won’t even be in the office. I have to find these documents or the IRS will cease my fucking home, please Rori, please, please, plea-“

“Fine! I’ll help,” She sighed.

“Thank you,” Sugar smiled. A comfortable silence fell upon the room for a brief second before Sugar spoke again, “Would it honestly be a bad thing if you and Carmy became friends again?” Rori sighed again, taking a moment to gather her thoughts.

“No, if we’re being honest, I would love that, but I doubt he would ever open up like that to me again. And, for shits and gigs, let's say he did, it took me months to cope with him cutting me out of his life. I-I don’t know if I could handle that again, I’ve never been so depressed in my entire life,” She paused. “You know how I feel about Camry, I don’t think there will ever come a time where I don’t feel that for him. It’s been three years, and when I saw him yesterday it was like the last 30 years flashed through my head, like everything came back to me, and despite the instant panic I just wanted to hug him because it actually felt like I was finally home.”

Nat’s eyes were glassy and she tried her hardest to hold it in, while another part of her couldn’t believe how much of an idiot her brother was. She had known since they were 10 that they were the perfect pair, not to mention both sets of parents often joked about the two growing up and getting married. Everyone expected it, so much that when Rori came home for Christmas in 2019, Mikey, Natalie, and Richie were shocked to hear that the two were no longer on speaking terms. She now hoped that if the two could just talk things out, maybe one day Rori would get to be her sister, like how they used to talk about as teens.

Rori became more anxious as they parked in the back of the restaurant, she was just thankful Richie was the only one taking a smoke break. She wiped her palms on her jeans before they started walking towards the door. She decided she was going to be cordial, she didn’t want to push Carmy away any further than he had already pushed. She was just going to stay in the office with Sugar and try to find this stupid document as quickly as possible.

After greeting Richie she slipped inside behind Sug and tried to keep her eyes on the ground. Carmen’s voice quickly got her to glance up as he was talking to Marcus a few feet in front of her. Their eyes met for a moment before she darted into the office and was quickly greeted by the poster of Fenway Park. A shiver went down her spine thinking about Micheal and how much time he spent in the office. She wondered if this was the last place he was before he went to the bridge that day, and she knew it was stupid to wonder things that were facts.

Two hours later they were still sifting through the never-ending paperwork. They were both growing frustrated and the office looked like a wreck. Rori was so grateful her phone began to ring. She noticed it was her publisher and quickly stepped out into the back alley. It was only a few moments later when Richie stepped out for a smoke break. He could tell it wasn’t a pleasant phone call from her constantly furrowing her brow and pinching the bridge of her nose. He took another drag just as she hung up. She looked at him and then at the cigarette he loosely held by his side.

“Can I?” She asked, gesturing to the American Spirit. He lifted his hand to offer the cigarette to her with a perplexed look on his face.

“When did Rori Bear start smoking?” He chuckled as she took a drag.She could feel her stress levels decreasing, even though she knew cigarettes didn’t help. She gave herself a moment before answering.

“Uh, I don’t know, about three years ago. I don’t smoke all the time though, it’s more of like an “I’m really stressed, or I have writer's block, or I just got off the phone with my publisher and they're bitching for a sequel” thing,” She shrugged before taking another drag and handing the cigarette back over.

“I’m sorry by the way, for calling you Rori Bear, it’s just habit y’know,” He apologized. It made her heart drop a bit that he felt the need to even say that. The nickname had always made her laugh, at least when she got older.

“No, no. It’s fine, I promise. Mikey always called me that, even after Carmy and I stopped talking so it’s okay,” She assured him with a smile. It wasn’t much longer before the two headed inside and she went back to the office to find Carmen and Natalie going through the mess together.

She went back to her spot trying not to focus on him too much, it was hard, but they all had their separate piles they were working out of. There was small talking happening mostly between Rori and Natalie or Carmy and Natalie, but that was better than silence. She got stuck on a piece of paper, it had MIkey's handwriting all over it, and then she noticed her handwriting. She remembered it from when she helped out during the pandemic. She had gone into the office and left him a note to remember to call the fridge guy and it ended up with them having a whole conversation every time one of them replied. She smiled brushing her hand over the ink, unaware that Carmen was glancing over at her.

“Oh, shit. I forgot to call Pete,” Sugar announced before slipping out of the office before either one of them could say a word.

Rori and Carmen both looked from the door and then to each other, then immediately to the papers they were both holding. He wanted to say something, but he thought he might vomit, or stutter, and that made him want to vomit more. Just say something, say anything!

“Uhh, so Book of the Year, is that like a big deal or?” He asked and then immediately regretted it.

“Kind of. I mean, yeah. I don’t know.” She settled on an answer all the while feeling like an idiot.

Carmen chuckled a bit, “You don’t know?” Despite him thinking he could’ve asked a million better questions he didn’t think that one was hard.

“Yeah, it is a big deal, but being the youngest to ever win a Pulitzer stunts your judgment on what is a big deal or not, y’know?” She explained trying to sound as humble as possible. Carmen just hummed in response, he did understand, which is why he didn’t care for awards all that much. Rori now realized it was her turn to ask something and she felt like there was a lump in her throat. She could ask all the questions she had been dying to know. Why did you push me out? Did our friendship ever mean as much to you as it did to me? Was there ever a point where you could have loved me?

“How has it been running this place? I mean besides all the shit that became yours and Sug’s problem.”

Carmen began to fiddle with the paper in his hand, trying to calculate a response that wasn’t completely unhinged. I’m so stressed I almost set my apartment on fire. I feel like one more thing might make me crumble.

“I-it’s definitely a change of pace from New York, but it’s not bad,” He tried his best not to lie. The room became quiet, but the tone wasn’t clear, it lingered somewhere between comfortable and awkward. They both knew it wouldn’t take much to make it flip, both of them grabbing folders to keep looking. She wanted to carry on a conversation with him, connect with him about something— anything. She opened her mouth to ask if Mikey ever got the fridge fixed, but he spoke first.

“Yo, I think this is it,” He leaned toward her to show her inside the blue folder labeled “Shit”. She met him halfway taking in the tax document not realizing how close their faces were.

“Yeah, yeah that’s it,” She smiled looking over to see his face an inch or two away. She glanced to his eyes wanting to burn the shade of blue even further into her mind, it was her favorite. He had always been a hard person to read, but not for her, she could practically see the gears in his head turning, he was trying to think of something to say.

“What is it, Carmy?” She asked, trying to pull the thoughts from his head. Say something, tell me anything, anything at all.

“Do you, uh, do you think we could talk, y’know about,” He paused to collect his thoughts again, “I think we should talk about things if you’re up for it. We’re both home and it’s clear that we’re going to see each other a lot. I just don’t want anyone to feel like they have to tiptoe around us.” I don’t want to tiptoe around you.

“I agree. Can you come over after work tomorrow?” She asked. Can you come over? I've wanted to show you my house since the day I bought it.

He agreed as Sugar came back into the office, the two shuffled apart proudly presenting the document to shut down anything she might say. After she and Natalie got the office back into some kind of order the two girls left, making an impromptu stop at the farmer’s market. Natalie obliged because she had nothing better to do, and after being stuck in the restaurant for hours the outdoor air seemed nice. They carried on a conversation about the “What ifs” in life coming to a bunch of unserious conclusions, laughing as Rori picked up some vegetables.

“What if you were picking up ingredients to cook Carmy dinner?” Natalie asked. She knew it was a bold assumption, but the mood in the office seemed lighter when she returned and she saw how close they were. Rori froze her hand going to pick up a tomato, she felt her cheeks warming up, and she just prayed her face wasn’t red.

“Well, I am picking up ingredients to cook dinner tomorrow night. If he eats, that's his decision,” She replied in a matter-of-fact tone. She didn’t have to look to know the grin on Natalie’s face stretched from ear to ear. She figured she had better do some damage control before Natalie got her hopes up. “We’re going to talk about everything. We figured it was better to get it all out there than to keep dancing around it. It does not mean anything is going to change, it just means we’ll be on the same page about all of it.”

The smile was still present on Natalie’s face, she knew this could only go well— no, this had to go well, for everyone's sake. She didn’t want to imagine what it would be like if it went wrong, she would be stuck facilitating every interaction the two had, not to mention what it would do to both their mental health. She pushed the thought as far back as she could. This was Rori and Carmy and she knew their story wasn’t over yet.

Chapter two!!! Please like, or reblog, or something! I hope you’re all having a wonderfully week!! My birthday is Saturday so I’m hoping to have another chapter out before then, or at the latest Sunday:) I going to do flashback I just haven’t decided if those are going to be actual chapters or like sub chapters, or maybe apart of chapter… ugh anyways, see you soon!

[nehswritesstuffs]

Intro Post, GO!

Jesus, Mary, and Joseph--I last did one of these in 2018... fucking...

Info under the cut, if you’re into that sort of thing.

Hi! My name is Nehs and I write stuffs. I’m a trained screenwriter and hope to one day break into that, but I also know that since it’s a lot of work and luck I might as well enjoy myself along the way. I’ve been writing fan fiction since about 1998 and sharing online since 2004, so when I say I’ve been writing fic for most of my life, I mean it. More recently I’ve been very active in the Doctor Who/Whouffaldi fandom and back in One Piece. These things are more alike than one would think. My life force feeds off of weird, rare, and otherwise less-popular ships as well as alternate universe settings.

Aside from being here I’m also on fanfiction.net and Archive of Our Own. In the past nine years I’ve put out about 1.78mil words on AO3. My totals on FFN (which begin in high school (beware weird/lower quality work earlier on) and are skewed due to author’s notes and review replies bc i’ve been on the site for so long) are at ~2.38mil. Not everything from here is on my FFN or AO3 and not everything on FFN is on AO3 and vice versa. I do tend to crosspost a lot of my work, however, so when one site is down, there’s usually a good place to find my stuff otherwise if you were in the middle of something!

(No, seriously, my FFN hits took off during the latest mass-AO3 outage and it was mainly for stuff that was crossposted, so don’t be afraid to come on over!)

Uhh... big things I’m known for...

The Time That We Love Best: slice of life Whouffaldi AU set from WWII-1960; a hundred chapters of a relationship and lots of period-related plot; there are prompt fills to add to the story

The Thick of UNIT: crossover involving Doctor Who and The Thick of It, prominently showcasing the crackship of Kate Stewart/Malcolm Tucker; contains many OCs, canon cameos from both shows, weird shit, and current events; lots of offshoots and even has spawned fic of the fic

The March of Kasterborous and Gallifrey: pseudo-fantasy/nobility Whouffaldi AU that starts with an arranged marriage and morphs into a loving relationship and the building of a dynasty; consists of In Want of An Heir, Stars in A Sky of Blood and Blue, a prompt fill fic, and an AU of the AU that’s a remix of the first fic

Getting the Hang of Things: my attempt at a close-as-possible-to-canon Whouffaldi AU where they raise kids

a bunch of different fantasy-related Whouffaldi AUs, incorporating things such as selkies, werewolves, vampires, a How to Train Your Dragon setting, and more

Father Like Son, Mother Like Daughter, Parent Like Child: a One Piece Bellazón AU where Cora-san and Bell-mère raise their six kids in the East Blue, they’re all better adjusted, and proceed to make it everyone’s problem

little seagull, little seagull, where shall you go?: a One Piece AU where the Heart Pirates find a kid during the timeskip and Law completes the circle and becomes her Cora-san; is pretty much becoming a pick-your-own adventure story as I write varying branches to the plot

Love, Loss, and Finding One’s Self on the High Seas; I wanted to write Sanji/Pudding that gave her agency and made things less creepy; there’s lots of other ships too and it’s just weird af trust me

Other than that I am generally friendly and willing to interact with people. Drop me a line anytime, about fic or fandom or anything else, even if you think it’s negative. My personal blog is escapaldi. I enjoy hearing from readers (I’m one of those people that stalk reblogs for fun tags) and anything is better than nothing. There’s always room for improvement in a writer’s craft, so if you catch something then please let me know. Anon is on and if you prefer to confer in private just say so. Another thing to note is that I tend to reblog fanart for things I’ve written,things I find neat/important, and any other projects I may be in at the moment. If you got a problem with that, then I’m not really sure what to tell you. *shrugs* Oh, and yeah, don’t feed my fics to an AI for any reason whatsoever or I’ll astral-project myself to your computer and no one will enjoy themselves. :D

[ssreeder]

omg i don't think you can even begin to imagine how fucking happy i was while reading this chapter. i love happy zukka, they are so !!!! together thank u thank u thank u thank uuuuuuu.

i became fucking insane reading this i swear, i love how you write, all of the characters you write about feel so human and real and full of details and feeling i love it. like, ara is such a complex character i really enjoy reading her. i enjoy reading anybody actually and like, i sometimes forget that some characters are ocs instead of actual alta charters. i love katara and suki being besties and the interactions between toph and sokka. AND ZUKKA AJS2(+#+$IDO!!!!!!2?2(2929. omg just omg. i love how caring they are for eachother and I'm so glad they are more open and touchy with eachother, i now feel like they can actually start to heal together.

OOOO talking again about Ara, i maintain my point about wanting her to have some friends and to heal because she deserves it!!! i support womans rights and woman's wrongs (jk, I'm still a bit angry at her for like everything she did to zuko and i want to se some kind of interaction between them but at the same time i feel bad for her). oh and jet, yey I'm glad he's not dead and he's starting to realize how much of an asshole he was!!!! i also really liked the piandao bit, because it made me remember how much time everyone (hopefully) has to heal, so please don't kill anyone sreeady ☺️☺️

i love love love love love love love love love your ocs and your characterization and your worldbuilding and your writing and how fuckin long your chapters are!!!(god when I saw the wordcount of this one i almost screamed of pure joy). i am your biggest fan sreeady i swear 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

anyways, i am excited about the next chapter, i really want to read the whole family dinner thing because that could either way go akward asf or low-key bad (of hopefully good but i don't want to get my hopes up). i am not really excited about azul, don't get me wrong, i love her, but I'm really scared about what will happen when she finally arrived and stuff happens.

as i always say, i love you, you are the best and i hope you have the best week/month/anything ever because you deserve it (you have no idea how long I been waiting for cuddling zukka 🙏🙏🙏)

MILKYYYYYYYY!!!!

I’m really thrilled you enjoyed the last chapter haha, because honestly sometimes I get so used to writing angsty drama that I get to a soft scene & im like hmmmmmmmmm do i even remember what that is?? Haha.

I AM SO THANKFUL FOR YOU OMG!!!! you seriously have no idea how many times I read this ask and smiled. I am so glad the cuddly soft zukka hit all the right spots haha, they are such dorks in love I just wanna smother them! (I won’t…. I promise haha)

You know you mention Ara and I gotta say I was expecting SO MUCH ARA HATE after last chapter but I was shocked people seem…. Idk…. More understanding? Idk I know she’s complicated & not a ‘good girl’ but when you explore her characters thoughts it really makes her that much more complex. Haha I’m not going to lie I’m not looking forward to her finding out about Shen though ahhh.

Speaking of dead fire benders you’re right it seems like pretty much DYING was the push Jet needed to confront his life choices. He was forced to look at his situation without voicing his excuses and blocking out his thoughts. Now hopefully he accepts those changes and grows form it but ehhhh jets my stubborn boy so we’ll see lol.

Milky milk milk I adore you. Thank you for this wonderful ask & sorry I used it to rant a but. I love reading your thoughts you are adorable :) I hope you enjoy the next chapter too lol. We get some fun moments (& Zuko imploding & exploding a bit haha)

[localplaguenurse]

Just ignore the smoke and smile

Hey, so I'm trying out some OC stuff here, as well as darker content, so yeah. I don't know how regular this will be, I'm just throwing this out here to experiment. If you do not feel comfortable reading for one reason or another, I'd just skip this post.

Warnings before you proceed: mentions of self harm, referenced past sexual assault and domestic abuse, discussions of addiction. No specific scenes are described, and it actually has a lighthearted end, but it may still be uncomfortable to read. With that in mind either proceed with caution or just don't read. I'm not your mom, I can't tell you what you can or can't read. Do let me know if I missed a tag but I'm pretty sure I got everything covered.

It’s peeking around the bathroom doorway this time.

When I look up from the sink after washing my hands, I see my face in the mirror. I don’t see it, but I feel it watching me. It’s been watching me for god knows how long. It was easy to ignore when I was younger, when I was some hotshot rockstar sex god dipshit who pretended not to know any better. I tell myself I didn’t, but that looming figure tells me I did, that I should have known better and now I’m stuck with the consequences of my actions.

You missed your wrist.

There’s still a little leftover lavender soap on my arm. I run it under the cold water, rubbing it off with my calloused finger and feeling the bumps of old scars under the tattooed skin. I turn the faucet off, and I stare at my arm for a moment. I read what is written there. “Be my reminder here that I am not alone.”

Which was more uncomfortable for him to do? This one, or the head of Medusa on your shoulder, where she liked to stub out her cigarettes?

I yawn a little. Alice has been sick for a few days now, and has been very fussy as a result. We were going to have a little get together for her first birthday, but I don’t really want to make her go through all the commotion while she’s this miserable. We’ll do something small for her today, and when she’s better, we’ll get everyone together. Mom will be really happy to see her.

Has your mom seen that tattoo? She likes to look at tiktok every now and again. It’s mostly animal crossing, but since your husband is a tattoo artist, she probably gets tattoo tiktoks.

I turn around to dry my hands. It’s still behind me.

Do you think she’s seen the Medusa tiktoks? Do you think she wonders? That she worries?

I turn back to the mirror. My hair’s getting really long again, and I’m going to have to get it bleached back to white soon. I brush my bangs out of my face, and I see the silvery scarring next to my eye. A sexy little battle scar to go with these pretty green eyes of mine.

Sure, package it like that. If it makes you forget how that pretty smoker you loved so much smashed that cup into your face, go for it. 

Why are you here?

I’m always here.

No, why are you here?

Like I said, I’m always here. You’re stuck with me, that’s the deal. 

I never made any deals.

You did when you wanted to be a “better man.” You want to cut back on the drinking and the drugs? You do know you did all that to forget what happened, right?

The only reason that happened was because I was an addict. 

Right. Do you remember how she used to bribe you with that shit? I mean, you were doing it before you even met her, but she had you wrapped around her finger when she had coke on her.

I shake my head and look for the hairbrush. It’s usually on the counter. Where is it?

Do you think your fans believed you when you talked about how you used to get nosebleeds all the time in high school? Your friends sure as fuck didn’t. It is weird that instead of calling you out, they memorized how to use narcan. 

Wait, Oli might have left the brush in the bedroom.

Actually, it’s pretty fucked up how much they either ignored or completely missed. Not even just the obvious addiction problems, but just… everything about her, and how you acted around her.

I step out of the bathroom, flicking off the light as I do. I head for our bedroom next door. It’s a little messy right now, but the exhaustion of fatherhood will do that to you. I really should gather up the dirty laundry while I’m in here, even if I don’t find the brush.

She was a massive bitch, but you were thinking with your dick like you always do. Apparently that’s all she cared about. That and getting you fucking hammered on the regular. I’d ask if you remember that, but I know you don’t. 

Oh, it’s on the nightstand on Oli’s side. I step forward around the bed, stepping over a stray pair of jeans to get to the brush. Oli must have used it to brush his hair while I was in the shower last night, and forgot to put it back. 

It’s always right behind me. It’s breathing down my neck, and whispering in my ear. Sometimes it’s my voice, and sometimes it’s hers. Sometimes it’s just a voice, belonging to no one in particular.

It eats away at you, not knowing what happened to you. She knows something about you that you don’t. Still, you hate thinking about what you do remember, right?

I make quick work of brushing my hair. Once it’s silky smooth, I set the brush down on the table again. I bend over to pick the stray clothes up off the floor. I don’t need my husband tripping and busting his good leg, and laundry day is coming up soon.

You’re still in pain, no matter how much you pretend you aren’t. At least you could forget the world existed when you were drunk or high. At least you were only hurting yourself. Why did you give all of that up if you were going to spend the rest of your life thinking about it?

I stop when I see a little creature waddle in through the open door. She looks at me with big green eyes and smiles. She sticks her hands out as she makes her way towards me. “Up! Up!”

I set the clothes in my arms down on the bed, crouch down, and scoop her up into my arms. “Hey sweetie,” I coo, “is papa making you breakfast right now?”

“Dada up.”

“Yes, I’ve got you.” I kiss one of her chubby cheeks. “Come on, let’s go say hi to papa.”

When I carry my daughter towards the bedroom door, I still feel it staring me down, but at a distance. Once I step into the hallway and turn the corner, it’s no longer watching me like a hawk. It’s still somewhere behind me, but it always is, and I’m used to that. I don’t plan on letting it fuck up my daughter’s birthday, either, so it can stay there in the corner like a loser if it wants to. It wasn’t even invited anyways.

I yawn again, and I smell pancakes cooking in the kitchen. I’ve had my fill of misery today, it’s time to actually get on with the day now.