#I just used you in the general sense
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I just saw someone talk about Simon Riley being a rapist and the only way they tried to confirm it is by saying that he is a war criminal and all soldiers are misogynistic and sexist and they also talked about how he dreamt of hurting women in the comics when that's quite literally a normal reaction by being raped by both men and women (what I mean is that abused people sometimes dream of becoming someone they're not and don't want to be) but they conveniently forgot to mention how that "dream" was a nightmare. (Just wanted to rant about this and see your opinion)
The sigh I let out when I saw this ask this morning.
I'm so sick and tired of seeing this discourse. Not just in this fandom but in every fandom. Maybe it's just because I'm old and my frontal lobe is fully developed, or maybe it's because I was in fandom back in the days where there were no tags. You were lucky if you got a warning at the beginning of a fic. Most fics you walked in blind and if you didn't like something? You hit the back button and found something else.
This sudden mainstreaming of fandom has ruined these spaces. People come in, refuse to "learn the rules" that most of us learned by just existing in these spaces and watching others interact. There were no written rules back then. We learned by observing and occasionally being guided on fandom etiquette by those more experienced than us. Now it's just like people come in expecting fandom to be like every other space on the internet and then get defensive and angry when they realize it's not. Fandom is cringy. It's nerdy. It's happy and sunshine and it's dark and ugly like every media out there. Us creators and those of us more experienced in fandom have been screaming how to exist in fandom spaces from the rooftops but no one is listening and then everyone wonders why creators are leaving these spaces. Why fandoms keep getting abandoned.
All of that aside, this discourse about FICTIONAL characters pisses me off. Simon Riley is a FICTIONAL character. He has no morality, there is no right or wrong because he's FICTIONAL. You can make him do whatever you want to do because he's NOT REAL. You can give him wings and have him fly and guess what?? Cool, that can happen because he's NOT REAL. You want to make him a rapist? Cool, you can do that because he's FICTIONAL. You can make him whatever you want to make him because he's a character. He's not a living, breathing human being. There are no consequences of his actions because he's FICTIONAL!!!
Don't even get me started on this sudden discourse about dark fics and dead dove that's appeared recently. Dark media has existed for literal centuries. The Epic of Gilgamesh from 1800 BCE. The Odyssey. Mostellaria by Plautus. The Castle of Otranto published in the 1700s. Frankenstein. Dracula. The works of Edgar Allan Poe. Lolita. Hell, look at the Bible. The Bible, especially the old testament, is fucked up. Even in the watered down, bastardized King James version, the things the old testament "God" supposedly did, when you sit and actually think about them outside the lens of religious brainrot, are super fucked up.
People have been creating dark media for a long time. Horror has existed for a long time because it plays to our worst fears. It gives us a safe way to express those fears and to experience them without having to experience them first hand. You wouldn't bitch at a horror movie director for including things like rape and gore and murder in their movies?? So why is writing different? You think every horror movie director agrees with the things they portray on screen? You think every horror movie director would go out and murder someone just because they made a movie about it? No, because we're allowed to portray things in all forms of media, we're allowed to write things without morally agreeing with them. Guess what, most people that write rape or assault or violence, aren't going out and doing those things in real life. They don't support those things in real life. In fact, people that write dark fanfics are some of the loudest protesters against those things.
If you want to make Simon Riley a real person, guess what? He's not going to be even morally grey. Most people in the military are not good people. They're not. The people that are good people in the military, or were in the military, are the ones saying that the loudest. People that got tricked into joining, people that got promised things, people that did it because they had no other choice and then realized what it was really like after getting in? Those are the people to listen to. Not Call of Duty, not the people trying to convince you to join because they're glorified sales people and have a quota to fill. Look up videos of what happened in Iraq and Afghanistan at the hands of American and British soldiers. You would not like Simon Riley if he were a real person.
But he's not real. He's FICTIONAL. Even as a fictional character, he's not a good person. So many Call of Duty fans put on the blinders and ignore the fact that these men are out here committing awful acts of violence and killing people because they're "the good guys." People love to forget that Price literally kidnapped a woman and a child and had them held at gunpoint to get information out of someone. Not only that, he was okay with it. If he were a real person that did that, you would not be questioning if he were a good person or not. You can tell the people that have never played the games or watched playthroughs, who only know these characters through the lenses of fanfics and artwork and headcanons.
Call of Duty is military propaganda. They paint these men as heroes, make it easy to put the blinders up and ignore the things that are happening, the things they're doing so that they can convince young men that they want to do that and they should join the military so they can go out and do that too. That's Call of Duty's audience. That's who they're creating these games for. These young, impressionable boys who get excited by the violence and the action who will go on to fill quota numbers for recruiters. Call of Duty was not made for us, the people writing fanfiction and creating art for it. This side of the Call of Duty fandom will be the first to tell you all of this.
This side of the fandom creates fanworks which would turn Activision's eyes red. We babygirlify their military propaganda because it actively goes against what Activision is trying to do. It goes against what Call of Duty is at its core. Sure, some people water it down a lot, and others keep it more realistic to what these men would be like in real life, because it's FICTION. You can portray these characters however you want because that's what fiction is for.
And guess what, anon? Rape kinks exist. Consensual non-consent exists. It's well known. And guess what? Victims of sexual assault and rape can develop those kinks as a coping mechanism. Here's a study from the NIH website, and if that's too complex for you, here's a VICE news article that uses that study. People can write rape and rape kinks and CNC and noncon and not support it in real life. People can write those things to bring awareness to the fact that they happen to people in real life, or because people in real life have those kinks. People write those things to help victims, to support them. It's cathartic. Dark media most often is created for catharsis. It gives people an outlet, and it allows people to experience those things in a safe, controlled environment for whatever reason.
And that's the thing, anon. People don't have to give anyone a reason for why the consume that kind of media. Creators don't owe anyone an explanation as to why they create it. It's none of your business, and if you're not comfortable with it, then don't consume it. You can turn off the TV if a horror movie is too much for you. People walk out of theaters all the time because a movie is not what they were expecting, be it because it was bad or because it was too graphic or violent or disgusting. You start reading a book and you don't like it for whatever reason? You put the book down and pick up another. Why do people have such a problem with not reading fanfics they don't like? Why do people have such a hard time just blocking creators that make things they don't want to see. Most dark fic and dead dove creators put ample warnings on their blog and their posts. That's why those tags exist. You don't like it and you don't want to see it? Then block and move on and let others enjoy what they want to enjoy.
You pearl clutchers are ruining fandom and soon there won't be anything for you to enjoy. If you can't handle fandom, then don't be in it. There is no algorithm here. You're going to see things you don't want to see and it's very easy to just block and filter tags. There was a time on Tumblr where you couldn't filter tags. I remember those days. You had to download the X-kit extension to block things, and that only worked on desktop. The fact Tumblr gave us the option to filter tags on the site and on the app was a big deal when it was rolled out. I remember so many people that didn't want to use the app when it first came out because you couldn't block potentially triggering tags.
It's not a creator's problem if you were triggered by their media. Life doesn't come with trigger warnings and it's a blessing that it's become so normalized to include warnings at the beginnings of fics. There's websites that exist for other forms of media that will give trigger warnings. If you can look up trigger warnings for a movie and decide not to watch it, you can look at the trigger warnings for fics and decide not to interact with it. You're not out here emailing the directors and producers of movies that include triggers you don't like, telling them they're awful people for including those things in their movie and they shouldn't. Yet you have no problem coming into the comments and inboxes creators who do this FOR FREE because we wrote one dark fic. Because we wrote something that's triggering to you.
And yes, some abuse victims go on to be abusers, some people continue that cycle because they don't have the help and support to break it. It's a sad thing that happens, but it happens. It happens in the fictional world and it happens in real life. People can make that happen to fictional characters for whatever reasons they want.
I've written dark fics. I've written several. I consume "disturbing" media for fun. I've read books and watched movies that would send these pearl clutchers to the hospital. Hell, I've probably written things (some published, some that will never see the light of day) that would turn these pearl clutchers inside out. Guess what? That's okay because it's FICTION. It's cathartic. I don't have to give my reasons why because it's no one's business except those I decide to tell because I trust them and I know they'll support me. I don't support those things in real life. Just because I write for Call of Duty doesn't mean I support the things the game portrays. If you consume Call of Duty media be it the games or fanfiction, does that mean you support what the game supports? What the creators of the games support? What militaries around the world support?
Think about that next time.
I’ve made my stance very clear here before, but I’ll do it again. In real life, I am anti military, anti war, anti gun violence, anti genocide, anti fascism, anti terf, anti homophobia, anti conservative, anti rape, anti domestic violence, anti colonialism and pro choice.
Just because I may create or consume media with those things in it, does not mean I support them. It's high time some of these pearl clutchers learn that.
The next time you want to come into a creator's inbox or comments and spew hatred towards them because of the things they write, why don't you do something useful with your time instead.
This will be my only discussion on this topic. I will not be answering any more asks like this. I will delete and block anyone who tries to come "well actually"-ing into my inbox. If you don't agree with this stance, then get off my blog and block me.
#free Palestine#free congo#free Sudan#free everyone living under a colonial apartheid regime#this was not directed at you anon#I just used you in the general sense#unless you think like that then it was#answered
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consumed by the inevitable
#messyr#you know- I kept thinking: One day. The cage will be open but I feel like I'll stay. Because if I run- I'd wind up dead from their bullet#so I just- tend to- follow as much as I want to rebel and put sense into this fuckass household. I hate seeing the others in pain as well#and it hurts more that it feels like I can NEVER be the one to break this cycle of abuse- when I knew from the start- when I knew too much#but here I am ending up like the rest of them- helpless and unable to do jackshit about the situation. I cant say or do anything at all!#I dont want to end up like them- if anything I want to BREATHE- i want all of us to LIVE without this pain that has existed for generations#I want to help so bad no matter how much I know I am unloved.#no matter how much hate i carry- no matter how much burden- Underneath it all- I'm devoted to them- that's how fucked up I am#i know i'll never be enough. I know how often I think of death and wish it.#But I have a dream to achieve and I am not planning to die until I reach it. Not yet. If pain is where I strive best then so be it.#doodle#vent art#artists on tumblr#bpd#toxic behavior#learned helplessness
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I've been doing a lot of reflection as of late, especially after this past class.
This past class was about the Torah and Tanakh in general, and the way the rabbi talked about the commandments (specifically the ten commandments) has made me really reflect on how I interpret them, specifically the fifth commandment, or honoring your mother and father.
This is a commandment I have wrestled with for a long time - in fact, it brought me away from g-d at multiple times. I was severely abused when I was incredibly young by my mother, and I used to feel insulted at the implication that I were to honor her while she got to live a better life. It was hypocritical, in my eyes.
But this rabbi surmised that this particular commandment was because parenthood is an act of creation, something that is like the g-d from which we come from. My realization is this: I don't think we're necessarily meant to take even these commandments literally.
I this particular commandment is more of a call to honor creation - creation is a gift, and like any gift, many people simply will not like it and will discard it. The person who abused me created me, but she did not honor creation. She didn't honor me, but I can still honor it.
I have started to honor creation much more. I'm too young, too unstable, not mature enough to be a father (though I fantasize about it), but I create all the time. I create relationships, I create with my hands through crochet. I create memories, I create my world. And I can honor who I am and where I came from that made me who I am. I've been learning one of the mother tongues of my family (Italian, since part of my family originates there) and it was judaism that inspired me to do this.
I don't think g-d wants me to honor my abuser. I think He wants me to remember the Holy action of creation. When I am a father, that act of creation will be Holy, and indeed, I am already joyful about the thought.
I have seen many people struggle with this particular commandment, but I think this perspective helps me personally. I don't think I ever have to forgive my abusers (plural), and I don't think I am commanded to simply because they happened to be family. I am commanded to recognize the holy, to elevate the mundane. In doing so, I will remember g-d. Through creation, I honor g-d and everything he has done for us, for me, and for our collective people.
#jumblr#jew by choice#jewish conversion#personal thoughts tag#abuse tw#i am not sharing this for the sake of pity and i also ask not to be told to divulge my abuse story. that isn't relevant#i have been needing to engage with this topic for a long time though and judaism has helped me a bit in navigating healing#but i decided to share this publicly in the hopes it will help other survivors specifically of familial/parental abuse#i know how it feels (in general). it's so lonely and you can really harbor (understandable) baggage about this particular commandment#i have a meeting with My Rabbi (sponsoring rabbi) and i might bring this up. we've only spoken once face-to-face (zoom)#so that might be really Intense to bring up to him but he is very kind and i trust him (which is why he is My Rabbi)#and he has already told me that he WANTS me to wrestle with g-d and His word *with* him#again i am posting this publicly so i can document my thoughts and keep them straight but also with the hope it MIGHT help others#if it even *casually* inspires another survivor i will feel so grateful (though it is THEIR achievement and not mine to claim)#i want us to survive. i want us to eat well. i want us to smile#i will say that this must be a very sudden whiplash in tone from my last post about sex. from sex to awful horrific abuse#my stream of consciousness is just Like This though in the sense that i have very sudden realizations and tonal whiplashes#so you're just getting a very frank look into how my brain is structured and what my brain thinks are important enough to think about#if i seem much more verbose it's because i needed to write this on my laptop which makes typing and more importantly yapping even *easier*
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One of the biggest things that makes me see Leo as trans is absolutely the size of his carapace in comparison to his brothers’.
And I’m not talking about height! I’m specifically looking at his shell here, because when you compare him to the others, particularly Donnie who is nearly the same height as Leo, it’s very clear that Leo’s carapace is much longer in proportion to the rest of his body.
Like - standing side by side, even though Donnie is shorter his carapace ends noticeably higher up than Leo’s does. And I like this not only because it really helps push the idea that Leo could very likely be trans (or intersex!), but it’s also just a fun design difference between them.
(It also lends way to future scenarios of Donnie eventually getting taller than Leo, but sitting down still has Leo being the taller one haha.)
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#trans leonardo#rottmnt headcanons#rise leo#trans leo#it’s like 4 am and I’m having trans leo feelings again sorry guys#totally get if other people disagree with me on this! but it’s always gonna be my no.1 headcanon fr#his complexion the vibrancy of his colors staying even in adulthood his general demeanor and this? this hc is LOCKED in my brain#plus the times Leo’s depicted in pink white and blue throughout the series like I KNOW it wasn’t on purpose but damn if it doesn’t help#(his nails are also the exact same as his toe nails/claws but I don’t super count this one tbh)#(even though it is TECHNICALLY another point in favor of trans leo)#(mainly because all the boys’ nails are very much more humanoid than turtle)#(just like how their tails aren’t really a factor either since we see them only in their baby forms and never again)#I really like the idea that he was a female red eared slider pre mutation#and Lou Jitsu’s dna paved how his humanoid features came out (aka a more masculine build and voice)#but his turtle features are all very much more in like with a female res#love the thought of rise bros meeting og comic turtle boys and Leo being like wait you guys are res too?? but…you’re not colorful……#one headcanon I have is that - you know the cute chirping and stuff we have the boys do?#I like to think that Leo’s chirping actually sounds more feminine to himself and his bros (so he tends to not do it)#idk I love thinking about this hc a lot and there’s no time like four am to talk about it huh?#future scenario has future Donnie going up to future Leo all smug like ah Nardo how’s the weather down there#and Leo’s all like good *sits down* why don’t you join me :)#Donnie: …*sits and stretches his neck out to be taller still*#Leo calls him a cheater but Donnie calls it ‘making use of his species’s advantages’#but yeah basically for many turtles the case is - bigger carapace? female. smaller carapace? male.#so it’s very interesting to take that knowledge and apply it here#did you know one of the turtles that this rule of thumb DOESNT apply to is alligator snapping turtles? male ones are the bigger ones there!#by a big difference too so Raph’s size makes a LOT of sense
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Bakugou who makes it a habit of FaceTiming you out of the blue because he’s horny. Your friend group and his own have had to bear witness entirely too many times to answering the phone and he’s exposed somehow—they always just wanna say hi, ask him how his recent mission is going. They learn after enough times, that when he FaceTimes you out of the blue, to steer clear of your phone until you give them the okay. there’s just been too many times with you answering and then screaming to the top of your lungs as you clutch the phone to your chest and tell him that there are people around.
but does that stop him? of course not, the little whore. he’ll call you after he’s gotten out the shower, so his body is still wet and glistening. he’ll call you while he’s away in some other country, with his dick in the camera and a pout on his lips because he misses your stupid face. he’ll call when he’s this close to orgasming, because seeing you will always push him over the edge.
he calls you one day while you’re working at home, typing away at your computer, your phone propped up beside you. you answer without looking at him, smiling, asking how everything’s going so far and it’s not until you look up, when you gasp.
“Katsuki!” You yell, a little giggle tearing through your words in surprise. “What if someone was around? Again?” You ask him, but it’s hard to remember why you’re this upset when he looks so pretty in front of you. He grunts, still jerking his cock as he sits on the edge of the bed, his phone propped up on what you believe a nightstand, as you can see the way his stomach curls in from how raggedly he breathed.
“You’re alone, right?” He asks in a huff, eyebrows screwing up as he takes in your wide eyes and slightly gaping mouth as you stare at his form. You nod absentmindedly, already feeling your inner thighs starting to get slick, shifting a little in your seat.
“Show me a tit, or something. I miss you.” Bakugou mutters, eyebrows pinched as he twists his wrist over his tip before he slides back down his shaft.
“When don’t you wanna see my tits?” You tease him, but oblige, lifting your shirt, eyes rolling slightly at the downright filthy noise that leaves his mouth at the sight. You don’t even have to play with them, just sit them on display and he’s already so quick to burst all over himself.
You take it a step further though, pushing back in your chair until he can see most of your body where you sit, slipping out of your bottoms and underwear until you’re on display for him. You put your knees to your chest before settling back, thighs on either side of the arms as you spread yourself, smiling at him all the while.
“So fuckin’—shit!” He sounds damn near strangled as he cums all over himself, eyes squeezed shut as he jerks at his cock. you can’t help but laugh when you hear the crackling of his quirk going off, watch how the sheets beside him char and start to smoke in his intensity. He’s always so easy, you think to yourself with a little laugh as you began to get dressed, and you love it.
#hc that he never used to jerk off this often until he met you bc you just make him feral and insatiable#also almost everyone has seen his dick atp bc of how often he does this lmfao#and the funny part is HE DOESNT EVEN CARE#‘mfs shouldn’t be in the camera when I call YOU it’s their fault’#and in a sense he’s right#I hate when someone calls me and someone else jumps in before I can like HELLO#what you might see is your fault after that lol#anyway this was based loosely on a very blurry dream I had#kinda clear kinda not but I remembered the general idea bc it was funny to me seeing everyone go#‘oh heyyy bkg—OH MY GOD IS HIS DICK OUT?!’#so 10/10 dream lmfao#im so tired of today tho it’s gonna be raining all day so I just wanna lay down all day :(#bakugou treats! 🍬#—new treat in the streets! 🍫
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NO BUT LIKE I DO HAVE A LOT TO SAY ABT HOW REDMANES BUT MOSTLY FREYJA AND HOW SHE SEES RADAHN OR HOW WE PERCIEVED HIM IN GENERAL, LIKE, JERREN WAS CLOSE TO HIM, TO THE POINT WHERE JERREN KNEW EXACTLY HOW HE WISHED TO DIE BUT EVEN THEN WE DON'T GET 100% IF THAT IS TRUE BUT THEN WE HAVE FREYJA THAT INSTEAD OF FINDING THAT HER GENERAL MIGHT BE CHARMED BY MIQUELLA, SHE DOESN'T FIND THAT TO BE APPALING NEWS AS ANSBACH DID BUT SHE LOOKS IT AS A WAY TO FURTHER PUSH WAR SOMETHING SHE INTERPRETS WAS RADAHN MERE AND ONLY GOAL. THE PROBLEM LAYS THEN IN THE FACT THAT WE NEVER KNOW EXACTLY *WHAT* RADAHN WANTS, HE JUST CAN INTERPRET AND TAKE GUESSES, BUT HE'S THE ONLY DEMIGOD BOSS THAT DOESN'T HAVE ANY LINES.
FREYJA INTERPRETATION OF RADAHN'S GOAL WAS JUST WAR FOR WAR’S SAKE, THERE'S NO FURTHER THOUGHT OR REASON JUST WAR FOR GLORY.
BUT THEN WE HAVE JERREN AND OTHER ACCOUNTS THAT SHOW THAT RADAHN DID HAVE A REASON FOR WAR, HE WAS KIND, HE TOOK AND RESPECTED PEOPLE THAT WEREN'T DEEMED ACCEPTABLE TO THE GOLDEN ORDER HE GAVE THEM RESPECT.
#elden ring#i just think too much abt radanh and his lack of dialogue#we have yappers and haters#we have TOGETHAAAA#but then we have deafening silence with radahn#i also think this is due to his main inspirations#mainly ancient heroes like#they sooo muddy as to who they were#just actions are left behind and leaving us to try to make sense of these#its just#....#i need to study you general radahn#elden ring spoilers
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i feel like chloe and max having relationship problems makes a LOT of sense considering everything the two of them went through, and max sacrificing arcadia bay would 100% be a huge one of them. especially considering chloe lost her mother to that. it’s a decision max made to save her, but regardless. all of their troubles r incredibly realistic but you lost me at chloe dumping her for VICTORIA CHASE. like?????? it’s like they completely forgot every single aspect of what makes chloe chloe. yes they would be rocky but she would fight for her, just like how she fought for her hope and love of rachel still being out there. like. she is incredibly loyal and not once in the original games did she even fuck with victoria. i’m less mad about them breaking up and more mad abt the character assassination of chloe
#life is strange double exposure#life is strange spoilers#life is strange de#chloe price#max claufield#pricefield#lis#life is strange#amberprice#i feel like the entire reason they do this is that with every new lis game there is a new relationship introduced/new love interest#and that’s the format they’re used to#but nobody was asking for that. nobody wanted that#the entire reason most people were excited to see this game was because of chloe and max#and getting to see them happy together in the future like we’d been teased with on other games#idk i feel like throwing away this relationship and not really giving a clear reason why just so you can introduce new romance plots#is a quick road downhill#this is not me saying you need to stick with someone you’re having relationship problems with if you’re a loyal person. in general.#to anyone who might read too much into this#i’m just saying it doesn’t make sense to me with the characters. and if you like this choice that’s fine i really don’t care THAT much
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Do you think that people who invent things with very destructive consequences are blinded to the downsides of it more by money or more by scientific curiosity?
I think the downsides are not always immediately obvious. Coal-fired electricity looks a lot more attractive in 1882 when there's literally only one such power plant and the global population is like 18% its present value. TNT was invented as a yellow dye, and it's so stable its usefulness as an explosive wasn't discovered until thirty years later.
We have this collective mental image, promoted by simplifications of historical narratives, that the inventor is a lone genius who through his labor produces an artifact and all its consequences in a single moment in time, and without which the thing would never be invented. Pretty much every point in that narrative is wrong. New technologies are the culmination of many different discoveries; there are enough very smart people working at the cutting edge of these fields that if one of them did not discover the principles behind these inventions, another almost certainly would sooner or later; and the exact applications of new technologies, nevermind how they will change society when those applications are utilized, often take years or decades to discover.
Now, I think there is an extent to which, as a working scientists, you can reasonably be held to account for the work you do. If you work at the Acme National Horrible Death By Chemical Weapons Laboratory, and invent a new, horrible chemical weapon, you do not get to go "oh no!" in shock when somebody dies to your horrible chemical weapon. And sometimes scientists do have a pretty good idea of how their technology will be used--the Haber Process was originally invented to manufacture fertilizers, but its application to the manufacturing of explosives was pretty clear to Fritz Haber, and he joined the German effort to develop deadlier chemical weapons pretty enthusiastically.
Men like Haber seem historically to be motivated not by intrinsic greed, but by the things which motivate us all: the desire to provide for their loved ones, the approval of their peers and the respect of their colleagues, and their status in society. The problem with respect to scientists who know damn well what they're doing isn't that everybody working at the Acme National Horrible Death By Chemical Weapons Laboratory is greedy and the job pays too much; the problem is that society, by and large, respects you and looks up to you and fetes you at public events and talks about what a patriot and a community leader you are if you do really well at inventing new, horrible chemical weapons.
#i knew a guy in university who said he would have no problem working for weapons r&d#because it's not the designers of the weapons who decide how they're used#and there was a valid point there:#shaking your finger at fritz haber only absolves the german general staff of the decision to use the weapon#or the kaiser of the decision to wage war#of all the people involved in the chain of events leading to chlorine gas in the trenches of the western front#fritz haber was probably the most generic#in the sense that if you went back in time and killed him in 1915 probably nothing significant would change#i think it's a little too pat to say the person designing the horrible chemical weapon has *no* responsibility#i certainly would find the idea of trying to figure out new ways to kill people extremely morally unpleasant#but without the military and political will to use those weapons#they just sit on shelves until they stop working
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kingisle whenever they need to coax older players back: HEY YOU PERSON WITH A WALLET!!! REMEMBER DRAGONSPYRE?!? REMEMBER HOW SAD THE LAST ACT MADE YOU FEEL? HERE'S SOMETHING REFERENCING DRAGONSPYRE!! ISNT THAT YOUR FAVORITE?!
#artenoise#ki101#wizard101#pirate101#like i have no issue with dragonspyre as a world but the extent that it's use to generate more hype is getting old#the mali the undying stuff with AZ and darkmoor and then the catacombs#and now this new pirate update#like it doesn't even matter if it doesn't make much sense like the young battledrake mount#DS is the cash cow even more than WC because they know people that played up to the end of DS or DM have some fondness for it#but it's getting so sour and overused imo#like if mali the undying didn't happen and get resolved ten years ago i would've bet real money they would've pulled it now#but they bank so heavily on the nostalgia but it isn't even that good of a world#the pacing comes to a screeching halt once you reach ashley#and the weakness spam is really tilting if you're trying to get it done in a day or two#but it's also not bad it still has the best aesthetics and ideas and doesn't feel like One Thing#like how wallaru is Just Australia or zafaria is Just Africa#and the atmosphere is great it gives off this post protagonist feel ig. where it feels like any other game would have you doing stuff#during the invasion. but no. it's just an active graveyard#that's the other thing the more KI tries to expand on it the less harrowing and mysterious it feels#which is a huge bummer.#even if the catacombs was cool#i know this is a long ass ramble but dude after seeing the new pirate update im just. bruh.#Yaknow
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#maybe I was naive before and/or maybe I'm just bonedead tired af and not making much sense (i know I am)#bue the thing is if you had asked me before this night why the USA have never had a female president unlike so many comparable countries#I would have...attributed like 50%-80% of the reason to structural causes and the obsession with male candidates#yes there are extremely regressive and misogynistic regions and subcultures in the US - but that is true for most countries!#it is also a country with some VERY progressive people#and I don't know any country where so many people are so constantly actively and vocally arguing in favour of FINALLY having a female leade#so yeah I attributed it mostly to the general obstacles for female politicians and how elections in the US work and even past candidates#and I guess a big part of me wanted to believe that all this clownery of men saying they feel emasculated voting for a woman#was just a special sub-category of freakishness that gets pushed into the spotlight during the election#but at this point (dead-tired and annoyed as all shit)...I'm at the point where I say the United States have an almost unique problem#with voting for a woman + the idea of having a female president#maybe it's the huge role of the military and the president as leader of the troops or maybe it's the impact of evangelicals on the culture#maybe it is the role of gender roles in pop culture being so deeply entrenched#obviously this election racism and Harris being a woman of colour also plays a huge role#but at the point I am it genuinely feels to me like there's a very specific hang-up in the US regarding female candidates#and I know a lot of people are going to end up saying: 'oh it has nothing to do with it it has nothing to do with gender'#and I would have had that discussion and said that the issue with discrimination is that often you can't prove the individual case#but at this point....specifically with the US I have a hard time being like 'maybe it was maybe it wasn't' in regards to this factor#sorry to say
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"Man Ginger, why don't you like doing lineart for things?"
BECAUSE IT TAKES TOO LONG AAA
Art for me is usually more about getting the broad strokes of an idea out so I can more easily visualise it when writing/planning. This, unfortunately, does tend to clash with my innate need to be good at the things that are important to me but I think I've gotten better about embracing the 'messiness' of my style over the years.
That said, LOOK AT THIS HYAPOLLO WIP I'M WORKING ON?? POLLIE'S COMING OUT SO GOOD LIKE??
I usually describe Apollo-as-Agreus (Agreus is the name he takes on while he's mingling with the mortalfolk) as having gold-brown hair both because he born a brunet in my story and because the word 'xanthos' in and of itself implies something that encompasses an entire spectrum from true-blond to auburn? My visual shorthand for this has been to just have Agreus' hair be a duller blond than the sunstreaked cloud colour of Apollo's more divine hair but MAN I was NOT expecting to love properly attempting to represent Agreus' hair this much! Ugh, I'm so excited to finish colouring this set of images!!!
#ginger rambles#ginger draws#apollo#wip#pursuing daybreak posting#I LOVE MY GOLD-BROWN SON#All the gods have various names they take whenever they're vibing with mortals tbh#It's very very VERY bad to call a god by name because that's like annoucing their name over a pa system#Apollo's name when he's with Hyacinth is Agreus but some of his other names throughout the years have been Kouros and Ephebus#combined with Agreus he usually just uses very general names when he's around which is really funny because he is a very abnormal presence#looking for that super pretty man you met at a dance festival and you're like “I'm looking for Kouros!” and everyone is just#“buddy this is a dance festival we're ALL kouros here”#He complains about Hermes' sense of humour but he's just as terrible#Agreus comes from his epithet as Apollo the Hunter btw so essentially his name with Hyacinthus is Hunter#You'll never guess what job he takes while he's hanging about the palace
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RORY I NEED OPINIONS (please)
Something popped up on my page and it was about Ghost.
The person who posted proceeded to say how they've had enough of the mischaracterization of him. And other people in the comments have said the same. How whenever they see Ghost written as a cold mean guy, they think, "oh you've never read the comics or played the games."
Now, I'm not here to bash anyone. I just wanna know what you think of people who write OOC {insert character}? Or what do you think about it in general?
Okay, this is one of the things that bothers me the most about the mainstreaming of fandom and fanfiction.
The whole point of fanfiction, is to write the characters however you want to write them. Fanfiction does not have to stick to how characters are presented in fandom. Some might choose to, others might not. Some might choose to in certain fics, and then not to in others. OOC exists as a term for a reason. It's okay. You can write/draw/headcanon/whatever any character however you want because that's your interpretation, or because it's how you want the character to be in whatever situation you're putting them in.
I know I said I was done talking about this, but this circles back around to the whole dark fic issue. "X character wouldn't do this" according to who? The fandom police? That's the whole point. The whole point of fandom and fanfiction is to present the characters however you want. That's always been its purpose. Fix it fics, OOC, crack ficks, dark fics, AUs exist for a reason. Not every character has to act exactly as they do in canon. If you want that, then just watch/read/play the canon media and stay out of the fanfiction side of fandom.
People that get all up in arms about FANFICTION not sticking to canon events and portrayals are ruining fandom. They are. People wonder why creators and fans are leaving fandom, it's because it's not fun anymore. You write a character how you want to write them and there's 50 people complaining in the comments about how "that's not how they are in canon." Yeah? And? That's the point. It's like whole ship thing with people being mad about fans shipping characters that aren't together in canon. News flash, people have been doing that for ages. Since the dawn of fanfiction. People ship characters that aren't even in the same movie or show or game. You gonna get mad about a crossover fic because it's "not canon?"
If you can't accept that FANDOM and FANFICTION aren't always canon compliant then you need to not be in these spaces. Leave us alone and stick to just watching the show/movie or reading the book or playing the game, whatever. You're ruining fandom spaces for everyone. Most of us creators have been in these spaces for a lot longer than the people ruining them. I've been involved in fandoms for 18 years now. Far longer than I should have been, and honestly, if I didn't love writing fanfiction and use it as an outlet for myself so I don't go crazy, I probably would have left too.
These pearl clutchers and mainstream people flooding into fandom that refuse to learn the "rules" and accept how things have been for literal decades are ruining fandom for the rest of us and killing people's passions for writing and creating. Us creators don't have to share. We do it because we want to and because we enjoy seeing others reactions and the interaction that comes from it. We are all very capable of just writing or drawing and keeping them to ourselves. Soon there won't be such a thing as fandom because all the joy will have been sucked out of it. Creators are already leaving in droves because interaction is down to nothing. Add on people getting mad about things that are normal in fandom and soon there won't be anything left. People will be complaining about there being no fandoms and no fanfiction and fanart and video edits and gifs, even though we've been screaming why from the high heavens for years.
#we need to make fandom cringe again#make the normies feel embarrassed for being into fandom and on tumblr#i'm begging you#also again this is not directed at you anon i'm using you in the general sense#even i feel it#sometimes i want to give up fandom#it's just not fun anymore#answered
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Freylin lovers… all four of you out there…. please talk to me abt them. I will love u forever
#re-inspired by the fanfic I just read of sapphic freylin#SAPPHIC FREYLIN SAVE ME#anyway even if it isn’t sapphic freylin#if you like freylin in any form!!!!!!!! even if not it's necessarily romantic/typically romantic! I need someone to gush about them with#I used to like them a very mild amount once upon a time.....#but then that changed once the Thinking tm started#it's about the themes............ transformation..mostrosity.... understanding each other in a way few others seem able to#about exoneration through the other#which kind of doesn't sound like the right word but I mean it in the sense that exoneration implies the accusation of sin/guilt is flawed#(unlike something like absolve.... which implies forgiveness for sins rather than the fact that there was no sin in the first place)#idk if that makes sense but I hope. the general gist comes across#anyway I have lots of thoughts about them but it will take time to write them all out#but pls tell me someone thinks about them as much as I do#look I know why they aren't a popular ship and I understand. but STILL#I need to know if there are others out there!!!#Freya#Merlin#freylin#bbc merlin
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Yo so I checked ao3 and apparently there's ZERO 2012 Donnie/reader coffee shop au fics??? Not even one??? Which is honestly a crime imo
SO I decided to do it myself. But I'm not currently proficient enough in writing fics to actually make anything. Maybe I just need to think about it more/harder...
So I'm writing a.. drabble.. headcannon.. thingamajiggy.. idk what they're called, honestly.
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2012 TMNT Donatello x Reader Coffee shop au ✨
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You work at a café, maybe a small mom and pop place, maybe one of a corporate line.
Maybe the café you work at is in a poorly-maintained area of the city and there's frequent power glitches.
(The café is used to this and is prepped for this scenario with at least one generator for all the appliances. As well as an abundance of candles and flashlights, which don't provide Fantastic lighting but it's enough to make by while they wait for power to come back.)
Donnie comes more often and stays a bit longer during these black outs. Otherwise he has only ever ordered to-go.
Donnie also prefers to come when it's less busy. Which is understandable, you don't like large amounts of people either.
Donnie disguises himself with a large hoodie (+ face mask?) and probably pants too. Or maybe a skirt, that'd be cute, I think.
Maybe he hides his hands with mittens or gloves. He'll play off the lack of fingers, if he's wearing gloves, saying it's because of an accident.
If he doesn't wear gloves or mittens he'll keep his hands in his pockets most of the time.
His skin is "like that because of a skin condition" he'll say. He only has 3 fingers because of a deformity, he'll say.
He either pays with straight cash or with a cash-app card. (Because how is a turtle gonna get money??) (The cash is taken from villains or found on the streets)
You don't question his behavior much, writing it off as him being insecure or shy or something.
After he returns a few more times you guys chat more and he meets you on your break to talk more.
After weeks, maybe months of him coming by to get his caffeine hit, it becomes your guy's normal to chill and chat on your breaks.
He also visits and hangs out before the café opens and after it closes sometimes.
#uhhh might add more later idk. ill see if people like this first ig.#i don't really know what im doing so beware ig#probably gon ditch the power outage idea cuz there's... little sense there. they could just use the generator(s) to power the whole cafe#maybe they're a café that just keeps their lights dimmed down all/most of the time and they make the drinks in the back (w better lighting)#for people who can't handle bright lights or smthn???#2012 tmnt#tmnt#2012 donatello#2012 donnie#2012 donnie x reader#donnie 2012#coffee shop au#café au#donnie x reader#donnie#donnie x y/n#donnie x you#donatello#tmnt donatello#donatello hamato#donatello tmnt#slow burn these bitches cuz that's what im into ig#it's 1:30 am typing this rn :D#first drabble??#drabble#au headcanons#tmnt headcanons#tmnt au#tmnt au headcanons
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THANKS @kimdokjafan you are so kind and generous. ok im cashing in the first of three blank checks to talk about faith trust and pixie dust (most recent chatfic) because the last two directors commentaries were too serious so let's do a silly one.
some p5r spoilers, and this is mostly about sumire, and it's long again. do i need to keep disclaiming that these are long? you should know me by now.
i had this written for a while before i started formatting it because i wasn't really sure if i should post it? i feel like silly chatfic is something people go to for predominantly lighthearted nonsense so i was like, maybe there's too much plot and dramatic misunderstanding and i should just keep this one for myself. but then i was like well nothing matters and maybe someone will have fun with it. it's kind of terrible how much fully or mostly completed fic there is my docs that just doesn't see the light of day lol. write for yourself etc but i like sharing! too bad it comes with the mortifying ordeal etc. anyway that was a tangent
potato counter is a neopets game. there's no deep lore i just like neopets. i guess in this universe ryuji doesn't play neopets? or maybe he's just never played potato counter specifically. i also have a different fic where ryuji DOES play neopets. it's about neopets and ryuji and goro talking on neopets.
i think this might literally be the first time ive written sumi in a fic because i haven't actually written that much fic for royal, like, now that im looking, literally almost none? and none that had a group dynamic. so it was kind of fun to find her voice for the first time in a silly groupchat like this. i was worried people would find her exclamation marks annoying but i personally thought it was endearing so i added it in there.
every time i do a gag where a character corrects their own typo i have to code more stupid little bubbles to make it happen but i think it's worth it. all the effort that goes into making tgis look as much like a real chat as possible
this obviously doesnt take place in the canon p5/r universe, but im imagining sort of a postcanon sumi personality where she's more comfortable being herself and isn't borrowing kasumi's brand of confidence, but she's visibly a really anxious person without that kasumi veneer. i also think in this universe sumire is a fairly recent addition to the friend group, and while everyone likes her a lot and she really likes them, i kind of wanted to emphasise that feeling of being in a friend group where everyone's established and you're sort of a plus-one? you don't really fit yet. part of that is her being new, part of it is her anxiety, part of it is just the kind of person sumi is where she's so polite and self-conscious she ends up taking herself out of things with her own good intentions. stuff like her interrupting the flow of an existing conversation by greeting everyone instead of jumping straight in because she doesn't feel comfortable inserting herself, which means everyone else stops to greet her even though that doesn't normally happen in a friend group, or making a point of thanking everyone for being invited to events while the others take it as a given.
idk i love that she feels a bit out of place with the phantom thieves in p5r. and part of that is a natural consequence of being a new addition in royal who can't be naturally integrated with an existing dynamic but i honestly feel like the writing team realised that and acknowledged it, and really leaned into it, and that made it work incredibly well for me. like, it's part of her character that she's sort of an outsider. it's not like p4g's incredibly clumsy integration of marie and subsequent attempt to shove her down everyone's throat as the canon love interest in p4ga (knife). sumi has that outsider vibe on purpose and it makes me really like her dynamic with the thieves as an individual
goro also feels slightly out of place in these chats, but his conversational style blends more naturally with the other thieves at this point and he even uses their codenames sometimes. i keep saying my chatfic series isn't a real Series because the lore keeps changing, but if we accept that they're all kind of following a General Continuity, assume this takes place some time after the last fic in which ren added goro to the groupchat and they made an effort to integrate him into their friend group. he's kind of there now and has settled into being the weird boyfriend. that's his role.
every time goro says something like "ren and i" assume it's the text equivalent of him talking to the group with his arm around ren's waist.
ok i got really fond of this silly running joke where sumi brings up the weather when she's feeling uncomfortable. she's so polite. i like this thread because setting it up meant i got to tie it off like this:
this just made me happy lol i liked writing this. i tried to use it to demonstrate that despite goro's abrasiveness he obviously knows sumire pretty well, he's attuned to her quirks and knows how to tell when she's having a bad time with her anxiety, so he uses her little weather habit to ground her.
i honestly dont think goro and sumire could be considered close in p5r and as much as i like the "royal trio" in canon they're not really... like... friends? with each other? they're both attached to ren, so it' more a V shape than anything else. but that said, i really LIKE goro and sumi's canon dynamic. he takes a really grouchy but politely attentive supervisory role to her during their few forays into the palace as a trio where he doesn't really know her well but clearly identifies her as a harmless little tryhard who needs some guidance and steps into that role grudgingly, and she immediately looks up to him despite being very wrong footed by his ruthlessness, which i find incredibly charming. i think given time they could be good friends, they just didn't get much chance to know each other very well in canon. so i tried to kinda do that here.
once goro stops being evil and joins the group they all kind of tiredly accept that his role is to occasionally push a cup off a bench while smirking and refuse to clean it up. emotionally, i mean.
wait i need to backtrack chronologically to talk about akeshu.
in this scene they're in the same room lol talking and snickering while typing. im trying to get at that vibe of the annoying couple who is flirting with each other, via you. you know? like ostensibly they're talking to you (sumire) but everything they say to you is part of their stupid game. sumi is incidental to goro and ren teasing each other about flirting with someone else, goro is reporting everything ren says because his boyfriend is so eye-rollingly foolish in a cute way. they're very tickled by how amusing and charming they are. gross. disgusting. sumire im so sorry for putting you through this
anyway here are too many of my favourite jokes from the fic
#futaba gets a lot of my favourite punchlines because i love her. i think she's an incredible vessel for comedic timing#once again you can see how much i overthink everything#given the amount of thought that goes into character shit for what LOOKS like a stupid 3 second chatfic#but is really. a stupid 3 second chatfic with twenty years of overthinking behind it#it takes time and effort. to be this stupid#anyway i love sumi. i think she's so cute. i like her dynamic with the thieves so much#ive said it before but i think chatfic is one of those mediums that looks so deceptively simple because#you know it's just silly dialogue and memes. it's very accessible. anyone can write a funny chatfic#but i think it's such a character-forward 'genre' that it's really really difficult to do well in the sense that it feels like the characte#s you know and not just mouthpieces for memes with familiar names attached. so im kinda obsessed with the genre#it relies so heavily on every character having a distinctive voice without trying too hard to be unique#ideally you should be able to read one of these with no names attached ands till get a general sense of who's talking#without having to rely on liek (sorry) homestuck style quirks which make it visibly obvious#that' skinda hard because irl people's typing styles aren't THAT distinct you know. theres only so many variations#you can make to a person's use of grammar punctuation capitalisation etc before it becomes a gimmick instead of an idiosyncrasy#but hopefully if the character voice is strong enough their identtiy should come through more subtly anyway. idk .idk if im there but i lov#to work towards it#wow i wrote anothr essay in the tags about my love for Modern Epistolary Fiction (chatfic)#after already writing a whole essay in the post#i mgonna shut up guys thanks for having me#rookfic#asks#p5#rookthots
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Be me, sit in Finland in your Finnish living room reading your Finnish news apps
Open an analysis about the upcoming US presidential election
"If Trump wins, his climate policy (or lack of thereof) will poison the entire atmosphere, make everything so much worse for the entire planet in the coming decades, kill millions. Expert says: It's gonna be so bad!"
Open a social media app instead
Immediately come across some asinine "there's no moral option in the election, the only moral option is not to vote at all!" discourse
Feel so incredibly, incredibly powerless
#it just boggles the mind. you guys (in general; this is not about any mutual) have the option to vote for the lesser evil and you won't?#ugh.#I'm not saying Finnish people are perfect when it comes to this#there were definitely some shades of this sort of discourse surrounding the recent Finnish presidential election#which I don't think was super great#but when it comes to the US it's on a whole another level. and just watching it from the outside feels so confusing and upsetting#anyway! maybe we'll come to our senses as a species before we've driven ourselves to extinction but personally I'm not holding my breath#politics#personal.
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