teyrnacousland

[teyrnacousland]

the thing i love about the hawke family is that it's entirely a reflection of hawke. hawke is shaped by the family, in the sense that all people are shaped by where and how they grow up, and the family is shaped by hawke in turn, because you create the family by your choices.

carver is your surviving sibling because you chose to be a mage, but carver is also carver because his siblings were both mages. i'm not here to tell anyone what to think, if you think carver would have been the same person regardless, that's totally fine, but i think the carver who grew up with an "ally", a non-mage sibling who was like him is a fundamentally different person than the carver who grew up having to protect two mages.

similarly, the bethany who grew up with self-loathing isolation... i think that's a different person than a bethany who grew up with a mage sibling, particularly if that sibling felt differently about their magic. that's a bethany who couldn't blame only herself for the family's situation, who wasn't always the odd one out, the one with the biggest and worst secret.

i love that the narrative bends around hawke, creates an arc where the defining feature of the surviving sibling is isolation. loneliness.

malcolm is the ghost in the machine the haunting at the center of the narrative, yes, but he is also shaped in your image. hawke is canonically like malcolm, which means that malcolm is canonically like hawke. leandra, who loved him, who gave up everything for him, then changes too, maybe more subtly. but who hawke is has to reflect on who leandra is, because leandra becomes the type of person who would anchor her life around a person like hawke.

[teyrnacousland]

By the way Rook supporting Lucanis instead of reprimanding him or so much side eyeing him after his first “mistake” at Weisshaupt hits more when it’s a de Riva. What do you mean you know exactly the weight of a failed contract and you still choose to side with me and stand by me and look at me like I matter outside of the small tunnel between perfect execution and embarrassing failure I put myself in. Like of course he’d die for them after

[teyrnacousland]

Thinking about Rook and Harding's relationship through the lens of Varric's death like. It's crystal clear it has a big impact on Lace - she's angry and distraught in its aftermath, has to psych herself up just to approach the ritual site ("You need to do it, Lace, it needs to be done"). When Rook suggests that she can use her powers to protect people, the first thing she thinks about is that she could've used them to protect people who mattered to her.

But she sees none of that in Rook. Rook comes across as standoffish at best. "Varric knew the danger." There's no in-game chance to reach out to Harding to share that grief, talk about how it affected them.

But it's not like Rook has to do that, right? Maybe they are not that kind of person. Maybe they grieve, but they don't show it, maybe Harding realises she and Rook just aren't as close as she thought they were, and that kind of stings, but you know. What can she do?

But then things happen in the plot. Weisshaupt happens, Shathann, Cyrian. There are so many chances for Rook to express how sorry they are about someone's passing, the loss of life (and Warden Rook especially does not just observe loss, they experience it and don't have to hide it). Harding sees that Rook can reach out to friends in difficult times. They attend the funeral with Bellara, comfort Taash when they need it. They can grieve, and they can help someone through grieving.

And there's that certain feeling of misunderstanding, maybe a hint of resentment, that Harding, a people pleaser, wouldn't dare to confront. What can she say, even? Why are you mourning all those people and not our common friend? Why not Varric? Why not Varric?

Then, she either dies, never finding out the truth, or finds out the truth so late that the rift between her and Rook has become so big they can't just fill it in. She can't undo the way she had been feeling, feeling about something Rook had no idea about. Tricked by Solas, manipulated to think that Varric was alive. Robbed of the chance to grieve a friend together, time lost forever.

[teyrnacousland]

sunsets & silhouettes

Chapters: 1/1 Word Count: 1.1k Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Illario Dellamorte/Original Character(s) Summary: Andrea De Riva recounts a fond memory with Illario Dellamorte, parsed among a myriad of others.

[teyrnacousland]

Wah I'm just thinking (writing) about the companions having to go in and get Rook from the regret prison and specifically Lucanis because oh my god. Oh my god. Like obviously the game can't have every single Rook be different but in the context of my Rook I'm thinking about Lucanis going in and seeing all of the terrible things she thinks about herself and all these regrets she has buried so deeply she doesn't have to think about them and he gets to where she's stuck and he remembers seeing her when it was his prison and his mind and she's crying even worse because she didn't want anyone to see what she thinks are the worst parts of her there's a reason she locks them up in the first place and Lucanis just being like "why would you ever think I'd turn away from any part of you" and it finally clicks for both of them that this is it. I've seen the worst of you you've seen the worst of me and I'm still here. In fact I'll always be here to pull you out of your prison because I love you. I was scared to say that before but now I realise that's stupid because you needed to hear it and I'm sorry and I love you. All of you. Even the parts you don't like about yourself

[teyrnacousland]

Viago de Riva

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[teyrnacousland]

Do you ever think about how enraged Illario would be that somehow his cousin—his actual cousin, Lucanis (yes, THAT Lucanis)—is somehow the Fandom Boy?

[teyrnacousland]

I think it's also important to remember that Lucanis has never been an ambitious person. Lucanis has never wanted to be First Talon. He isn't going into this job with a list of ideas about what he wants to change about the Crows. He wanted Illario to be First Talon, he very much spent his life wanting/expecting a continuation of the current status quo. He has never even let himself consider that he could be First Talon someday, so he's never thought "if I were in charge, this is what I would change". He's never let himself think past "if I were in charge", and if he ever did his next thought was likely "I'd die soon enough so I don't need to worry about it". Lucanis, at least as he is currently, does not have plans to reform the Crows in any way.

Even things like the Crows being an unstable not-quite-organization full of infighting isn't something he ever seems to talk about as "I would change if I could", it's more "it is what it is". Maybe once he accepts that he actually is First Talon, whether he likes it or not, he will start to think about fixing things like that. But as of right now, I genuinely don't think he's let himself consider what he even could do as First Talon, let alone what he wants to do.

Teia and Viago are the ones who are out there grabbing power where they can and rising through the ranks because they have ideas about what they would change if they were in charge of everything. Lucanis has never been that type.

I love Lucanis but I am not convinced that this is the man who will reform the Crows.

[teyrnacousland]

You get trapped with two Dragon Age characters (spin the wheel) in one room for a day.

[teyrnacousland]

Chapters: 6/8 Fandom: Dragon Age: The Veilguard (Video Game) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con Relationships: Illario Dellamorte & Lucanis Dellamorte, Caterina Dellamorte & Illario Dellamorte, Caterina Dellamorte & Lucanis Dellamorte, Illario Dellamorte/Zara Renata Characters: Illario Dellamorte, Lucanis Dellamorte, Caterina Dellamorte, Zara Renata, Rook (Dragon Age) Additional Tags: Child Abuse, Siblings, Antivan Crows, Antivan Crows Training (Dragon Age), Antivan Crow Rook (Dragon Age), Seduction, Dysfunctional Family, Dubious Consent, Temporary Character Death, Canon Temporary Character Death, Grief/Mourning Summary:

hood training (def): the process of using a falconry hood to keep a bird of prey calm and acclimatise it to human presence.

or, a study of Illario Dellamorte

[teyrnacousland]

Also it is probably only Right and Natural that Anders fans and Cullen fans be locked in perpetual conflict but considering that both our arguments seem to boil down to “Well My Fictional Blonde Man Isn’t Real And Therefore His Actions Don’t Matter (But Also He’s Sad So It’s Fine) But Your Fictional Blonde Man Must Face Justice For His Actions” I kind of feel like we should just throw in the towel and kiss instead

[teyrnacousland]

Fantasy character: "After the adrenaline wore off..."

Me: This fantasy world has knowledge of the endocrine system!

Fantasy character: "It was a pyrrhic victory..."

Me: This fantasy world had a Pyrrhus I of Epirus!

Fantasy character: "She was dressed in a kind of elvensilk onesie..."

Me: This fantasy world has a Gerber corporation!

[teyrnacousland]

I've seen the headcanon that Lucanis' mother, Caterina's perfect heir, was actually similar to Illario in some ways. That she was calculating, ruthless, ambitious, obedient... all the things Caterina overlooks in Illario because Caterina sees her favourite daughter's deep brown eyes and quiet, controlled demeanor and careful planning in Lucanis.

But I am also attached to the idea that the opposite is true too. That Illario's mother shared similarities with Lucanis; that she was empathetic and stubborn, with a slight rebellious streak. But she was always outgoing and charming, was more impulsive with her emotions, and was always sharper with her tongue than with a sword, so Caterina only sees her in Illario.

I just love the idea that Caterina can't look beyond the surface and see who her grandsons really are because on some level she can't see past the ghosts reflected in their eyes. She can't see that the quiet brown eyed boy is is more of the gentle hearted rebel, and the one with blue eyes and a shining, fake smile is the ruthless leader who would do anything she asked.

[teyrnacousland]

A Murder of Illarios 🐦‍⬛ 🗡️

[teyrnacousland]

illario dellamorte really does that have effect on people where it's like "no i don't care about you". but to care about lucanis and the other crows u MUST consider illario. and slowly he becomes more compelling. and now he's in ur damn house.

[teyrnacousland]

these 'names' sound wrong

[teyrnacousland]

Dragon Age: The Veilguard - Grey Warden environmental decals