#I just feel a little weird reblogging it
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That one piece of Tech fanart going around destroys the, “Tech has to be dead even though they didn’t show a body, because it’s a kids’ show, so of course they couldn’t be graphic,” argument by clearly showing that there is a body in a clear, definitive, non-graphic way, btw.
#the bad batch#tech lives#not that Mayday choking on his last breath in front of our eyebulbs#and then lying there dead for several minutes already didn’t but#didn’t destroy that argument already but#oh look yet another way the writing/production team could have been unambiguous#and clearly chose not to#it’s actually a really good piece of fanart#very haunting#I just feel a little weird reblogging it
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I'm so normal about them 😊
#yeah Imma just post this now because I don't know what else to :')#I love this ship so much#they're also fun to draw :D#I actually really like this so um#reblogs. would be very much appreciated by little ol me#that feels weird to say from me but I just hope you like :')#okay enough blabbering BACK TO OVERTHINKING THINGS#jjk fanart#jjk#jujitsu kaisen#gojo satoru#geto suguru#satosugu#sugusato#my art#art#have a nice day/evening
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i wanted to write a post about how soul is such a victim of character assassination in this fandom but for now im just going to post this
is an animal that lashes out when cornered evil? after all, a snarl of either sort looks the same
#cccc soul#cj soul#chonnys charming chaos compendium#soul is just as messed up in the head as the other two are. there. i said it#idk. a little weird how quick some people are to act like someone who is suffering is an irredeemable monster#i just feel bad for this character. i relate to him a lot so sue me lmao#despite the artstyle this is NOT A VENT PIECE feel free to reblog!!!#i just like this little guy a lot. :3#if i am the only soul fan in existence so be it#eyestrain#eyestrain warning#need to write a more elaborate post later this guy is fascinating to me#i need an art tag
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#i’m putting this down here because i don’t actually really want to talk about it or answer asks about it but i’m like a little annoyed lmao#first of all obviously people should have boundaries and not be annoying/invasive/etc. duh.#i have been around the rpf block many a time and rule 1 is don’t be a weirdo. don't let it out of fandom spaces :)#but yeah idk. oliver stark to me feels like someone who is actually very familiar with the mechanics of fandom warfare#and therefore does not know how to log off when it starts to get personal#like to be clear i definitely do not think he engages directly with This fandom other than to lurk and spy on people for fun/haterism#but in MY opinion he has the energy of a person who spends a nonzero amount of time engaged in petty anonymous beef#over a character or a ship or a sport or a new brand of tofu. idk i don’t really care what he’s into#but it does sort of seem like he forgets that when he’s doing it on his real socials with his real face and real name attached#people are going to know that it’s him and respond accordingly and he should just like. block them and move on.#and maybe even go back to his burner and vague about it or something if he truly cannot just walk away.#which he does seem to be sort of getting slightly better at but it's still just like. yeah man! i don't know what to tell you.#people are weird sometimes. we all get weird anons and dm’s and people cyberbullying us. it sucks and it shouldn't happen but it does.#and you do literally just have to find ways to make it easier to ignore them. i know that you know this#because you are a human who grew up on the same exact internet as the rest of us.#i say; as i feel compelled to post about a tiny situation from like 12 hours ago that has literally nothing to do with me#anyway!!!!!!!#i went into the settings to turn off reblogs and thought how funny would it be if i blazed this post lmao
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I loved the cowboy comic so much that I wrote a oneshot for it. https://archiveofourown.org/works/50934235 🥺 your art is BEYOND amazing, ty for the food
INCREDIBLE!!!!!
#billdip#I honestly loved this story start to finish with the ambience and quick pace#hadn't considered the possibility of Bill and Dipper actually working *together* but it's always a good time when they do ❤️#sorry it took so long to reblog 🥲#I read it like- Right when you posted. But I had to catch a plane and then drive an extra hour home and immediately get on zoom for class#and today i was just all around exhausted so i slept roughly 70% of the entire day dndsjdndnd#all that to say that I had your fic in the back of my mind and I very much wanted to set some time aside and re-read it when I got the chan#honestly with how well you set things up I would've loved to see your own rendition of their first kiss#You established their relationship really well at the start and brought them together by the end after outsmsrtong those bandits#it feels like you have a better understanding of who they are to each other than even i do 😌 very much a fan#i love when stories incorporate those sort of 'habits' that the love interests fall into#that confuses character A while character B is so clearly using it as an excuse to get close and spend more time with them#i squealed like a maniac when Bill was like oooph lemme walk you home 😏🤠#sir i am going to wrangle you up if you don't compose yourself#and Dipper's just wary of him because people as handsome as bill used to pick on him 😢#little does he know he's grown into a 10/10 cutie patootie that any cowboy would be stupid NOT to smooch#I'm a simple man. I read oblivious low-confidence cowboy being pursued by a hottie on a horse. I lose my shit#Awesome wonderful writing!!! so happy to have caught your eye and i hope to continue pumping out content for this wonderfully weird ship
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I feel like being mutuals means so much less than everyone makes it seem
You literally just follow each other, that's it
Most of my mutuals probably don't even remember who I am after I stopped drawing for them
Edit: the rant in the tags is more about being annoyed with people who tell me they like my art and follow me, but that's it, no art support at all
#the tags are gonna be a bit of a vent bc I think about this a lot#maybe it's because most of my mutuals only ever interacted with my post when it was art for them#I don't get notifications that they liked my art but they tell me they like seeing my art#I see them reblogging bigger artists than me and it's a little discouraging in a way#they talk big about my art on discord before following me for emphasis#but then they never liked any of it#they sometimes reblog my reblogs#but that's it#it just feels gross to me to act like you support and love someone's art so so much and they're “cool” to you#but then it stops at just words in a server#actions speak louder than words#I don't want to sound entitled or spoiled#I just feel a little deceived that they said they like my stuff but I get no evidence of that#ofc I love seeing my mutuals that do like my stuff more than anything#I do have regulars that do support me and I try to support them as much as I can#but I can't help but feel weird trying to support someone who doesn't even look at what I do as they talk about liking it#They don't need to say any of that but they do and it feels like lies#ofc this is all so whiny and I know it's so stupid#I'm probably going to delete this later#I just wanted to say it finally#vent#tw vent#vent tw#vent posting
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I don’t really talk about it much on here because I’m extremely lucky to be able to understand exactly what’s going on in my body, but it’s scary to live for years as someone who Gets Things Done in a way your peers don’t really understand, be putting effort into so many things you care about, and then suddenly lose the ability to do not only that but also basic tasks overnight after a deadline, and bit by bit after many. it’s scary getting really irritable sometimes to the point of violence, just when you were meant to be celebrating the rewards from your hard work, the only impact of the work you did that you can see is that you overdrafted your ability to do anything. including have a basic conversation without getting grumpy or crying. and your body is going to make you pay it back with interest, you already know that, but you don’t know how to start filling yourself back up. you’ve only ever enjoyed being on the grind, hard at work on exciting things.
I don’t know how many of you have been through the kind of burnout that’s years of needing 12hrs of sleep a night but with terrible insomnia, waking up to what feels like a hangover for weeks on end with little relief then rinse and repeat without having a single drink, feeling too sick to eat and needing to exercise to emotionally regulate but being unable to, anxiety that doesn’t come from worry but you’ll pick that up too at some point, dissociating every time you try to do mentally taxing tasks that you’re PAID for so it takes an hour of grounding yourself just to get five minutes worth of productive concentration, falling asleep the minute you feel a little safe by being in the presence of loved ones. but I suspect I’m not the only one.
I’ve had songs for the energetic and angsty times leading up to this. for the exasperated times and the brain fog and the times where all my limited energy is tied up in feeling things. that I need to, need to acknowledge, but it’s overwhelming and I live in a haze for weeks as a result of. songs telling of the kind of youth I wish I had, even when I was sold something else. songs for the months spent as a teenager trying to be there for my friends, worrying for them, distracting me from worrying for myself, trying to cling on to positivity and hope amongst it when I had to choose to make a discipline of always seeing that. I’ve had songs for healing and when healing is harder than expected and songs that have the right level of musical complexity to capture the layers of everything that’s happening in my head, making it sound good, telling me it’s gonna be okay.
I don’t know how I could ever say thank you for this. but I do know that I see parts of myself in the people behind these songs, of course I do, and I worry for them as a result and ache for them because it’s hard enough to feel this way when no one knows me or feels the need to control me or mould me into what they think I should be. I’d do anything to keep them all healthy and happy and all of their loved ones too and I don’t think it’s strange as a fan to take that seriously. I hope we can understand the need to treat them gently, and to while not questioning their privacy and the fact that they’re never going to tell us everything they go through, listen to our intuition when we catch something we relate to and treat what they’ve shared with us or hinted at with the dignity we would if someone we love told us something vulnerable. be kind in our expectations and be intentional in the fan culture we create because it does make its way back to them.
and the same goes with all of you. we’re bonding over the same things. I know a lot of this fandom is in the stage where interpersonal relationships are hard. we don’t mean to be grumpy of frustrated but we are. and I’m sending love to all of you. we can get through this together. it’s what they’ve always longed for isn’t it?
#thoughts after how worried I’ve been recently. since june I think#I’d love to start a conversation in this fandom about the connection im newly discovering between burnout and mental illness and fatigue#in a way we can be positive about these things and be there for each other without calling anyone to confirm if we interpret some songs#to represent experiences that may or may not be theirs because it doesn’t matter in the end. we have these songs and if you get it you get#we’ve all been clocked as ‘not feeling very well’ recently anyway so. it doesn’t need to be specific. but we do need to be kind#like hey. artist. I don’t know exactly what you’re going through to have written these songs that mean this to me. but I’m here for you#fill in the blanks. all we’ve got are our stories to share. I hope mine helps us understand and be a little kinder to those who need it#without thinking we can judge who we think needs it. but rather default to kindness and in the case of musicians etc that means patience#it means we learn together. what it means to connect and have boundaries and the boundaries they might like to have#anyway I’ve not said who these songs are by so if you reblog and wanna tag another artist that’s g I’ve got a few by several others as well#but I know this fandom. I know this band and I know exactly why I worry for each band member though I’m not gonna say here. just. take care#5 seconds of summer#5sos#luke hemmings#ashton irwin#calum hood#michael clifford#exact experience of burnout I have talked about is that of someone with adhd and a pda profile and some form of bipolar#which may be a product of pda profile things or not. these aren’t the only diagnoses I’d likely fit but they are the ones that explain the#story and have guided me to understand how to recover and I’m doing that bit by bit. and if you want me to tell you how please ask#but I’m not advertising it cause that’s weird I’d sound like a scammer if I did. even if when I’m hypomanic I think I can heal everyone
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#i still find phannies so annoying lol#“we know everything about this man! and he reblogged a post which totally proves we all know him on a personal level!”#like jokes or just being sweet and emotional abt them are one thing#but there is a line and it just feels like it does get crossed a lot#but if u say aaaaaaanything about it ppl will jump down your throat and say ur a puritan killjoy#when like actually i just think u guys are being a little weird towards these guys u barely know.....
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somtimes a boy's just gotta recognize the girl he used to be and acknowledge what she did for him and then move on to keep living his life knowing she's watching proud of what he's done
#i really feel like i am a boy who used to be a girl#and I don't really acknowledge that because it can be really triggering for my dysphoria#but that girl learned about being queer#she has childish crushes on girls and callrd herself a lesbian and learned about the existence of trans people#she did most of the work to get me where i am#and sometimes i feel like she was someone else entirely#and it's a little weird to feel like the boy i am now was never an innocent kid#but that was the girl. she let me become who i am and stepped aside#but i think she'd be proud of what I've done#how far I've come#so i just wanted to appreciate her for a minute#good job younger me. you got me here. i appreciate all the work you did <3#transmasc#ftm#personal#oliver talks about himself again#transgender#please be kind I'm just thinking about my own personal experiences with gender#feel free to reblog though#queer#lgbtqia
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Years and years later but especially in the last three years, I think people focus way too much on Apollon/Apollo's physical appearance to an odd (and frankly intense/offputting) degree.
"Oh, Apollon's so pretty!!!!!" ...okay, but what about literally anything else about him? Is there really anything else about him that stands out in a positive cool way to you? Do you like that he has a connection to mice? to fertility? to archery? to disease? to people who are feeling out of place or in a new area? to the home? to the thriving of a city and its community? to war/battle(fighting)? to aid and protection?
#apollo#apollon#there#I finally said it#it drives me insane with how shallow and vain it is#maybe I feel extra weird seeing it because he's like an older sibling to me -- but also to the nth degree because#he's a god/individual and dare I say distressing#dorian's polytheism diary#people can reblog if they want I just need to vent a little about this because while it might be small to some -- it's eating at me
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nothing worse than when you see a post that is 100% a joke and not at all serious but that also kinda highkey rubs you the wrong way for slightly stupid reasons
#i a little earlier saw a post from someone joking about how a computer program using they/them pronouns to refer to another user#was transmisogyny#and it just kinda really rubbed me the wrong way a lot#because like yes i get that thats completely a joke and its not serious#but also increased usage of they/them pronouns in circumstances where the referred persons gender is unknown#is a *very* definite positive for trans rights#and i feel like acting like its a negative even for a very dumb internet joke#is honestly incredibly reductive and stupid#and anyways this is reslly not a big deal in any direction but its 8 am and i havent slept and am feeling Weird#from quitting the meds ive been trying the last few months#and yeah i am turning off reblogs on this post because im slightly afraid this post would get me cancelled#if the wrong sort of discourse blogger saw it
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I miss being younger and believing the queer community was actually a safe space
#turns out white queers hate poc just as much as literally every other white person ever 💔#big bummer for young me man I feel like the part of me that still believed in people being inherently good broke a little more that day#That sounds super dramatic but it's true in a way#hard to have faith in the inherent kindness of humanity when u grow up black in a predominantly white area 💀#this just reminded me but those positivity posts that r like 'people Are kind' and then like say smth oddly profound kind of make me hopeful#but then just kind of upset#they always feel like theyre comming from a place of privilege yknow#like bro i wish strangers were nice to me out of actual kindness#and not a weird need to prove to the world that theyre not racist without actually putting in any effort to be antiracist#'hey look at me treating this black like a human being! see? im an ally! i posted black sqaures in 2020 and have blm in my bio!'#this is bc my local juneteenth festival got canceled due to lack of funding bc. yknow its been 4yrs#everyones (white ppl) moved on#they dont care anymore and they dont need to bc they alr did the bare minimum to absolve themselves of guilt#rant#ig im lucky i live in a super queer town but its so overwhelmingly white it kind if cancels that out yknow#personal#okay to reblog#if u want to ig idk#moth.txt
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Second installment of 'he's a dad ;w;' Taurus edition:
I just really love Kamui and I think it's bullshit that we don't get to bond with him more, especially considering all the implied shit that's yet to come??? Absolute bullshit ;0;
#tokyo afterschool summoners#housamo#housamo horkeu kamui#horkeu kamui#housamo ocs#housamo taurus#I just really love the thought of him training her since I imagine he's the one with the most shield training out of the early characters#Also he'd have so much fun being able to guide someone again#it'd be so cute 🥹🥹#Also also he's going to be primarily wearing his ainu clothing because I-#I feel a little weird??? about him wearing an Ainu themes??? Loin??? Cloth??????#Like#idk#considering that the Ainu don't particularly have a lot of media spot light aside form- oh I think the most popular one is Golden Kamuy??#At least as far as *I* know#But I digress#Anyway sorry about the tag rant#I just have emotions about the characters lmao#sfw#not a reblog.#my art.
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one of the most annoying interactions in the world, to us, is when someone establishes an opinion, people disagree with it, and instead of ignoring or blocking the people who can't mind their own business, the original person decides to become the most annoying person ever to literally everyone else in the interaction. "have you ever-" no, but we have seen the interaction happen very publicly multiple times and it never gets any less annoying. like we don't know how to tell you that acknowledging every comment or argument, no matter how cordial or even shitty, with some shitty snark ass remark is not endearing or funny. it's not going to prove a point to anyone. do you not have better things to do.
#Faye Vents#Faye Complains#it gets even more annoying when the annoying behavior extends even to people who are being respectful#or are just saying shit like ''i like x thing but i still see your point''#one of the interactions that stuck with us that really. solidified our hatred of this behavior.#was someone talking about how everyone who liked a specific brand of character design had bad taste.#''lesbians need to get better taste'' being a comment that stuck with us.#it came across our dash randomly one day.#and we were like ''oh. well; they're using characters from a game we like as an example feels bad but okay; not our problem''#and then we ended up catching just. a couple of reblogs on the chain. some cordial some not.#and just. just. the most infantile responses to them.#which caused us to foolishly look in the notes#and see it's just filled with op going through them and having just hundreds of stupid; infantile replies and reblogs to every single perso#who disagreed with them or called them out on their weird behavior in the notes.#just essentially dozens of jokes that amounted to ''*shits and burps at you* did you hear something'' to literally everything.#like are you 5. do you not have anything better to do.#do you have a job. a hobby. literally anything other than being an annoying shitlord on the internet. nobody thinks you're funny.#we don't know. it stuck with us really hard and it still bugs us to this day.#we don't know why. probably because; again; they used characters we liked as examples to their point. so we felt a little targeted.#we don't know; we needed to complain for 0.2 seconds.
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okay fINE i'll just say it!! i miss fandom!!
#i know i'm still like. AROUND. but it's different#ofc it's different#idk man#things don't click and clack in my brain the way they used to#which is probably a good thing all things considered bc we were in a bit of a pickle mentally there for a hot minute#but goodness gracious i miss the community of it all and the freakouts and the emotional meltdowns over Some Guy(s)#it was FUN#it IS fun#and there is nothing saying i can't reblog shamey stuff whenever the fancy happens to strike me#bc it is not that serious and it ultimately doesn't matter what i do bc life is just one small blip in the grand oblivion of it all#but i feel like making a french exit and then swooping back in is a bit of a weird move lmfao#anyway#this is all to say that i'm thinking about them today#i'm thinking about their love and their story and the way that they were literally the blueprint and completely unmatched on all levels#and it's driving me a little mad#maybe i'll make some gifs#we'll see where the day takes me#okay that's all goodbye
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and btw im in my hater arc rn. as time goes on the more i find a lot of 'fandom' stuff insufferable (i like art n stuff. just the way that fandom refits every media to fit a single mold and set of boring archetypes is exhausting.)
i just get really easily annoyed lately. and have been unfollowing people on a whim a lot. its not personal i promise
#fandom culture has made me actively dislike shit i was fixated on a year ago. looking at your ninja turtles#its not even like what they were doing were particularly offensive it was just exhaustingly boring#im sorry i just really dont care about ur 2 million fics about leo being a sadboy. or one million seperated aus.#theres definetly a part of the whole situation in general which has been me coming to terms with my own internalized misogny#actively re-examining my tendencys to gravity towards male characters#idk maybe its making me dislike art more. but idk. ive always analyzed why i react certain ways to certain things. this isnt new for me#anywaays. i had been following a bunch of ninja turtle blogs and they sorta kept messing around with shows like ninjago too#and at some point i was just like. i dont know if these shows are actually that good guys. i think youjust like shows for little boys#and fandoms tend to shaft female chars so it sure helps that their casts are 98% male .#maybe theyre not your blorbo maybe theyre just Guy McAverageMan. thats not inherently bad but you have to consider it.#guys rottmnt is isnt even that good . its not that good ok. its alright/pretty good. and the movie does a few neat things#i feel like ive become one of those people that turn 18 and then immediately go 'minors dni'. im not there yet but i just.#we're watching kids shows. its ok . you can say it.#you may have noticed ive been reblogging a lot of dungeon meshi stuff. i read it all over the past week.#but here's the thing. i thought it was mid/good for like 70% of it.#i think its got some really really cool worldbuilding ideas and stuff#but i think a lot of the writing was sorta. uninteresting to me.#my discord friends have been raving over izutsumi for months.#but i found her presence in the story to be weird and underdeveloped. she felt out of place and her introduction felt clumsy#i felt when the story was ramping up the manga got a lot better. because again theres some rlly cool ideas at play#all the shit with the lion? incredible. the way all the infighting led to more problems bc the elves refuse to explain anything? rlly good.#marcille landing in power? reallly good shit. (i still thought it was a lil undercooked still tho)#i cant stop thinking about laios in that climax scene. i think he shouldve been feral a lot more often#uhh. i got distracted. fandom bad and annoying.#saw a post talking about marcille realizing izutsumi is only 17 and then describing how 'omg shes a mom now' and i wanted to throw up#im done. i swear. im done talking for real. aagh#text
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