#I don't deserve this niceness

[demaparbat-hp]

He truly did.

[inkskinned]

today i love the red metal crane in her long neck arching her body over the boston skyline, which means i am okay for a moment. when i am unwell, everything is a little ugly. i always tell myself look for the beauty but when it is bad, i will look at birds and sunsets and little ducklings and feel absolutely nothing.

when my brother got his puppy, i was in a deep depression. what kind of monster isn't affected by a puppy. i was gentle and kind to her - i just didn't have an emotional reaction. she's five now and i feel like i spend all of our interactions apologizing to her - i don't know why. i just didn't feel anything. how embarrassing. i feel like if i admit that, i'll seem cruel and jaded. it comes in waves. like, two months ago when i went out into the world - it was like that. life behind a pane of stormglass. a firework could go off over your head - nothing. like dead skin, no reaction. not to ice cream or rainbows or baby chickens. life foggy and uninteresting.

i love goslings again. i love their little webbed feet splayed over grass. i love good food and live music and long walks. i like puppies. i feel like some kind of my soul has been starved - i keep staring at everything with wide eyes, trying to burrow the sensation into my stomach. it's real. beauty is real. when it's bad again, remember this. i stop and smell the flowers, feeling cliche in the moment. i like the white-to-red ombre of my neighbor's roses. i like colorcoding and yoga and cold drinks. i try to pass my hands over every moment, feeling like i'm squeezing joy out of every instant. remember this. for the love of god, it's real - just remember this.

[cosmicdreamgrl]

𝘧𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘫𝘬 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘴: (114/?)

[inamindfarfaraway]

I would find Blondie Lockes very annoying in real life, but I love her in fiction. She's a genuinely good journalist in terms of both skill and ethical integrity, who only occasionally forgets to check the facts because she's fifteen and holds herself accountable when she does. She has incredibly high standards for everything and believes herself to be the ultimate authority on quality. She has magical lockpicking powers because her fairytale is about Goldilocks breaking into a house. She somehow completely ignores the story's moral that Goldilocks was wrong to break into the house, feels entitled to go wherever and help herself to whatever she's able to and cannot comprehend why people dislike this. She's been terrorizing an anthropomorphic bear family with her cheerful disrespect for privacy and is convinced that they love her. She has a non-anthropomorphic pet baby bear. Her motivation is dependence on external approval rooted in deeply internalized classism. She's desperate to be useful and important to those with higher social status and feels the need to lie that her family is technically royalty to fit in with her royal friends, even though they treat commoners like equals all the time. She positions herself as a conduit of true greatness; closer to it than the masses, but never the hero, always reporting on other people and evaluating what they've done. Because what she's done isn't enough to be worthwhile. What she is isn't enough. But this performative lifestyle makes her anxious about being judged as a fraud and an interloper, and ashamed of selfishly transgressing against social norms. Her microphone head looks like an adorable little bear head. That's one hex of a character alright.

[rocketbirdie]

Weird thing that bothered me about Rebirth and I want to hear other people's thoughts.

Um... Why did they gentrify Gongaga? I can't be the only one who feels cheated by the chummy suburban development vibe in Rebirth.

OG Gongaga is an isolated village deep in a jungle. It's possible to completely miss the first chance to visit, because it's practically unheard of. All the young folks fled to the big city. A reactor blew up and killed most of the inhabitants, leaving the town in a state of decay. The houses are falling apart, the people are desperate, it's derelict and miserable.

An understated theme in the OG is how life is difficult without modern technology. Avalanche sets out to destroy these reactors without considering the consequences for their own futures, thinking "well it won't be easy but i'm sure it'll be fine." Gongaga is the story's way of showing you just how fine everything is going to be— despite being in a lush rainforest, long since violently cut off from Shinra's influence, these people still suffer immensely.

I wanted to see it in hd so bad honestly. The splintered rotting wood, the furskin rugs, the dirty brick walls. The unspoken yet unignorable trauma. The mournful purple twilight that quietly hangs over the whole village. I wanted to see the survivors' spiteful determination to make things work without mako.

Instead we got a squeaky clean Crisis Core rendition of Gongaga, with its down-to-earth upbeat stardew valley soundtrack and generic hard workin' country folk. The houses are like... twice the size i expected them to be. Neat and tidy, no holes in the roofs, no dishevelled interiors. No sign of struggle. Everybody is content at worst.

The reactor may as well have never exploded. Nobody talks about it. We hear some bullshit about Shinra trying to "make amends" or compensate people for the damages, and that's about it. Apparently everybody's just fine with this, because all of the original version's resentment and grief is gone.

Don't even get me started on the barker stationed at the town entrance. "Come experience nature's bounty!" Man... why are we treating it like a goddamn hippy tourist attraction. OG Gongaga would have had someone knock this kid's teeth out.

Idk I'm just sad. The melancholy is what made Gongaga so memorable despite its bump-in-the-road identity. I wish we could have gotten that instead of one big callback to CC.

[iliothermia]

If you've ever said a kind word to me I appreciate it.

[imagine-to-be-a-pike]

I will never forgive fandom how unfair it is about Arthur

Dark Merlin It's usually good angst. You know, Merlin had had enough. Dark Arthur? Arthur is a fucking rapist, a monster.

Merlin guilty? Merlin feeling guilty and comforted by the entire cast. Arthur guilty? Arthur doing the worst things possible and someone razing him to the ground

Merlin always gets these nice things. always flowers, courtship, everything. Found family? Everyone comforts Merlin because big bad Arthur. (literally almost every Merlin "found family" is everyone loves Merlin and treats Arthur like shit)

Merlin gets an apology. Arthur? My parents will love me faster than someone will apologize to Arthur in fanfiction.

"suicidal, self-harming Merlin" but Arthur has no right to have mental problems (a whole lot of people have wanted him dead since he was born)

Protectivr knights? Always about Merlin.

Even the fucking omegaverse. Alpha Merlin is a nice calm creature who pretends to be a beta. Alpha Arthur... wild animal, keep Merlin in a cage.

No. Just no.

(forever grateful to those stupid British people that arthur never told merlin he was fat. because the fandom understands that something is a comedy if merlin says it. if arthur it would be ,,abuse")

[stuffnonsenseandotherthings]

I think something I love about Moonlight Chicken is that you get three different generations of LGBTQ characters sharing the same space and you can see, through the subtleties of their interactions and their outlooks, the events and perspectives that have shaped them and how much (and how little) the world has changed.

You have Jim, nearing 40 and clearly shaped by countless people (including his loved ones) not welcoming who he is and who he loves and who believed, to a certain extent, that it was "normal" for people to think that way, who accepts himself but still has difficulty with what it means to be gay in the wider world.

Then you have Wen, 10 years younger and proud and open and comfortable with who he is and his place in the world. He knows all the lingo, he seems like a little bit of an activist (if his taste in decor is to be believed) and he's used to having discussions around sexuality and social norms.

Finally, Li Ming, even younger still and so comfortable in himself that he doesn't particularly feel the need to explore or explain his sexuality and his attraction to Heart, he just embraces it as another part of what makes him him and leaves the nail biting and the questions to other people.

They literally show us the transition from "being LGBTQ is something I must live with" to "being LGBTQ is something I must fight for" to, finally "being LGBTQ is one of the many bits that is me" without ever saying it out loud.

It's genuinely such a beautiful piece of commentary and, in my eyes, it makes the show even more meaningful and beautiful.

[whenthewallfell]

~ and if I can dissolve I do ~

(hanahaki au below the cut)

AU where Peeta develops the hanahaki disease during Catching Fire and the only people that understand the significance of it are Mrs Everdeen and Haymitch, both of which he swears to secrecy since he's going to die in the arena anyway. Snow also recognises the symptoms (rumour has it he underwent surgery shortly after his time in D12) when Peeta is unable to hide it from the cameras during the Quell. The flowers are removed as part of the hijacking process, but whether it was successful or not is uncertain - dandelions are a stubborn weed after all, and their roots grow deep.

[sysig]

Light and darkness, but mostly darkness (Patreon)

[inkskinned]

one of the things about being an educator is that you hear what parents want their kids to be able to do a lot. they want their kid to be an astronaut or a ballerina or a politician. they want them to get off that damn phone. be better about socializing. stop spending so much time indoors. learn to control their own temper. to just "fucking listen", which means to be obedient.

one of the things i learned in my pedagogy classes is that it's almost always easier to roleplay how you want someone to act. it's almost always easier to explain why a rule exists, rather than simply setting the rule and demanding adherence.

i want my kids to be kind. i want them to ask me what book they should read next, and i want to read that book with them so we can discuss it. i want my kid to be able to tell me hey that hurt my feelings without worrying i'll punish them. i want my kid to be proud of small things and come running up to me to tell me about them. i want them to say "nah, i get why this rule exists, but i get to hate it" and know that i don't need them to be grateful-for-the-roof-overhead while washing the dishes. i want them to teach me things. i want them to say - this isn't safe. i'm calling my mom and getting out of this. i want them to hear me apologize when i do fuck up; and i want them to want to come home.

the other day a parent was telling me she didn't understand why her kid "just got so angry." this woman had flown off the handle at me.

my dad - traditional catholic that he is - resents my sentiment of "gentle parenting". he says they'll grow up spoiled, horrible, pretentious. granola, he spits.

i am going to be kind to them. i am going to set the example, i think. and whatever they choose become in the meantime - i'm going to love them for it.

[missmitchieg]

[angelpuns]

Deep deep fear that one day all my friends are gonna decide they just don't wanna talk to me anymore for whatever reason and unfortunately, I won't get the memo and will keep trying and that'll just make them hate me more :(

[the-sunlit-earth]

a lot of clipping to fix, but hey I got it moving at least! I'll get the Telvanni robe properly physic'd if it's the last thing I do >:0

[noxious-fennec]

Trying out some new designs (aka playing dress up)

[kaycapo]

Victim is absolutely horrifying.

I know it's already known that he's pretty much evil, but it's so much more than that. (This is a long rant. Keep reading if you're interested.)

I mean, just look at the way he treated Chosen. Instead of trying to get information out of him immediately and then fighting if he refuses, he instantly just started beating him. Some can argue that he was weakening him so he would be too weak to fight back when he was questioned, but I doubt that. Agent easily could've just removed all his powers, but he didn't. He removed some, sure, but he let Chosen keep some. Victim could've tried to talk to Cho at the start. He might've spilled, and then the whole fight would've been avoided. But instead he just started beating the crap outta him for, to Chosen at least, no apparent reason.

It seems like to me Victim wanted Chosen to fight back. If he didn't, why not remove all his powers and tie him up? Then he could beat him to 'weaken' him if he wanted. But he didn't. He let Chosen fight back.

I'm guessing he had it that way because he enjoyed having power over someone. He liked the feeling of Chosen desperately fighting back, only to be beaten again and again until he was eventually defeated by him. That's how it went with him and Alan. He had no power, and was used as a toy where he was destined to be defeated, no matter how hard he fought back. He made that same situation with Chosen because he doesn't want to feel like a victim anymore. He wants to be in control, like Alan. His obvious enjoyment of Chosen's struggle is part of the reason of what makes him so scary.

He also did some unnecessary things, to say the least. I mean, whipping Chosen? Why? He also whipped the ground right next to Chosen as he was crawling away, probably to evoke fear. And even as Chosen froze himself, he didn't stop, instead he created clones of himself to hurt Chosen more. He saw Chosen was most definitely scared. (Probably terrified, who wouldn't be after being whipped and beaten down by someone you just met with your powers suddenly being weakened and some taken away?) But he didn't take that as a que to stop and start questioning him. Not only does he like having power over someone, I think he also just enjoys physically hurting people. And probably likes seeing them scared, considering he was trying to make Chosen afraid. He's most definitely sadistic. It's not a surprise, considering his past. He probably developed other phycological issues, like sociopathy.

It also seems like he kidnaps innocent sticks. This is a bit of a reach, but hear me out. We all know Victim has a company, not some police force or something of those sorts. They also kidnapped Second, who was completely innocent in everything. The mercenaries attacked Sec when he was at first friendly, he was waving to them and looked nervous. What part of that screams 'danger'? Sure they saw Chosen with him, but when they started shooting, they weren't aiming to where they saw Cho. They were aiming for Second who panicked and started running around in obvious fear, again, no indication of being dangerous, but never stopped until Chosen came in to save Sec. So what do you think would happen if Victim took an interest in a stick that's, probably, innocent? They would be kidnapped most likely. I brought up the company and not police because of the cells. They were made to keep people inside, but I highly doubt they were 'arresting' people they believed were dangerous. So he probably took people who he thought might have something to do with Alan, or maybe for other, bad, reasons. He doesn't know Second and Alan are related, yet he was taken anyway. I can only imagine what Victim tried to do to the sticks he probably kidnapped. I wouldn't be surprised if he kept them for weeks or longer, until he threw them away once he lost interest. So that adds to how scary he is.

He's also selfish. He's completely happy to let others suffer just so he can get his revenge. I mean, I don't blame him for wanting revenge, after all he was killed. (Or deleted, whatever) But he's so blinded with rage and the need to make Alan pay, he doesn't care about who he hurts, innocent or not. He's making others suffer because he suffered himself. That is selfish. It's also makes him so dangerous and scary.

I honestly adore Victim as a character. He's so interesting and I love analyzing him. He's evolved from a simple victim, to a monster who has so much control and power over others. He enjoys creating fear and likes to bring others to submission. That alone makes him a terrifying and dangerous villain.

Sorry for the long rant, but I needed to get my thoughts out.