#I cannot compare this to anything I have no idea what is as sensitive as a tiny human

[chaoticbuggybitchboy]

How do any humans live ever what the fuck

[joocomics]

ಬ boyfriend

pairing: bf!hueningkai x fem!reader

genre: smut — mdni! wc: 1.4k

contains: dom/sub dynamics, dry humping, filming, pet names, dirty talk, unprotected sex, established relationship

a/n: i don’t know, i don’t know… it’s been on my mind, what else can i do about it

“more?” kai’s lips form a soft grin while he continues to observe you from below as you sit still on his lap.

“more,” you agree, an affectionate smile forming on your own mouth too. “there’s always room for more pictures of my cute boyfriend.”

kai’s cheeks turn warmer from your words or more specifically from the new title he’s earned himself recently - your boyfriend. the ring of it always calls for butterflies in his stomach, because it sounds so special when you say it. yeah, he feels good when he gets to introduce himself as your boyfriend, but it cannot compare to the satisfaction he gets when you do it, and how the whole air in the room shifts from the confidence you speak out the words with. this is my boyfriend… it’s huening kai, my boyfriend…

he looks up at your face again and lets you snap few more pictures without even trying to focus on the camera, to pose or anything like that. he’s smiling lazily, but he hasn’t stopped doing that since the moment you came over. his cheeks might start hurting soon.

you drop your cellphone next to you on the bed after capturing his tender gaze which still has sleepiness in it from the afternoon nap - it’s only making him look more charming, you notice, - his messy bangs that are peeking from his black hoodie, the soft plushie resting on his chest that’s moving up and down steadily with each calm breath he takes.

you cannot resist the tempting look of his lips for long, nor the way he looks at you as if he’s going through your mind.

kai sighs blissfully as you slowly pull away from the gentle kiss, but not too far, because his one hand goes at the back of your neck and pulls you back in. carefully, but with enough persistence which only causes the next kiss to get more intense in no time.

your tongues eventually meet, wet and warm, they glide against each other, making you moan softly just when kai allows his hand to slide down your back. he gets a hold of your hips as you push the plush toy away and unzip his hoodie in need to feel him closer. you both do all of these little things in order to get more from each other without actually having to separate your lips or bodies too much, because the idea sounds unbearable.

“kai—“ you mumble into his mouth, feeling your face, neck and back turning hot as he begins to grind you down on him… as if you’re actually fucking; with a firm grip that turns even tighter every time his lower body jumps up slightly against you for even better friction.

“mmm…” kai squeezes his eyes as this would help him comprehend better whatever you’re about to say. his brows knit together from the nice rush that keeps coming every time you press against him and glide up along his erection which is peeking vividly through his pair of sweatpants.

“this…” he finally speaks before you manage to gather your thoughts, “feels good…”

the last word shakes a little turning his voice more into a whine.

“i was about to say the same.” you reply, tracing the side of his face with your lips; kissing his sharp jawline, then even lower where the skin of his neck is warm and sensitive, sending arousing thrills through his body every time the tip of your tongue touches it.

you feel him growing harder, meanwhile kai feels himself throbbing and leaking inside his underwear. the hot wave washes all over him with each move of your hips that eventually quicken their speed.

you need him - all of him. now. and you want to break the kiss to tell him that, but you can’t seem to force any of this to stop even for a second. having sex with him was all that’s been on your mind this morning while waiting for the hours to pass so you can come over at his place. you haven’t been intimate a lot, because your relationship is still fresh and new, and it all feels so ecstatic, so exciting. every time you do it it only feels better than the last, and you wonder how it would feel now.

however, you just keep grinding on his hard erection, enjoying the delicious sounds slipping from his puffy lips that are glistening with your saliva.

huening kai feels his skin sweating underneath his clothes as the overwhelming pressure in his core starts to feel like it’s about to burst. his moans multiple so much to the point you can’t make out properly anymore. he stays with his mouth open, growing weaker from your hot breathing fanning his face, and occasionally attempts to press his lips to answer your kisses, but he fails. his whimpers elevate in the room as his hands almost take complete control of your lower half, guiding you back and forth until the ecstatic climax hits him.

the sound he makes as he spills into his underwear is the most satisfying sound you’ve ever heard in your life. you pepper his face with praising kisses while he tries to compose himself with empty mind and face contorted from an expression that makes him seem high and so unbelievably attractive.

with hazed eyes, kai follows your next movements - how you remove his stained sweatpants then afterwards his boxers. a wave of shame washes over him like a bucket of cold water at the sight of his own mess, but the emotion quickly fades away once you run your flat pink tongue along his hard cock. you successfully maintain the eye contact while gathering all of the essence that’s sticking on his swollen tip causing him to twitch. you kiss it softly a few times before getting rid of your own pants so you can move your panties to the side and welcome it inside you.

“fuck, y/n—“ kai whimpers, pressing his head back into the mattress. the squeezing, the wet arousal, the suffocating feeling of your walls… the sensation is always so strong and pleasant.

the first few seconds are always challenging because of huening’s size. you still haven’t gotten used to being with someone this big and it takes you some time to adjust. despite the fact you had sex the other day, because it’s all you want to do, the feeling of it still surprises you like it’s the very first time.

your whimpers beautifully blend with his as you begin to move up and down more freely.

“y/n—“ his hands glide along your thighs before grabbing your waist. “a-ah, keep going—“

your skin slaps against his every time you land on his lap, hitting your sweet spot with the head of his cock that feels so hard between your clenching walls.

kai shuts his eyes while biting his lip in order to contain at least some part of his desperate mewls… and he looks so handsome while doing so, your hand acts on his own when you pick up your phone to record just a few seconds of it.

“my charming boyfriend,” you coo at him, placing a palm on his cheek. “you look so hot, baby.”

kai’s mouth opens in awe as you make one really slow move with your hips, rubbing your clit against him nicely. when he blinks up at you and sees your phone again he smiles shyly. a light chuckle escapes his lips before he kisses the inside of your palm.

“you’re so good to me,” he utters almost in a whisper before making another weak noise of pleasure.

after the video caught the red hues that are painting his neck, you tilt kai’s head in your direction by grabbing his chin, and caress his lips with your thumb. they’re more red than usual, slightly swollen from the long kissing; begging to be devoured again.

“am i taking you well, baby?”

your hips keep up the nice steady pace as you drip down his cock. the camera catches your small heavy breaths while the footage of kai’s teeth grazing your two fingers continues.

“i think i am,” you mewl through a cheeky tone, “i want my handsome boyfriend to feel amazing inside me.”

you push your fingers a little bit further on his tongue and you can see on your phone screen that he likes that even more. his hands crawl up beneath your top as his lewd moans wrap around your knuckles. his heavy eyes open for a moment to look at the camera with lust and haziness before they flutter shut again.

you end the video and toss your phone away. you’ll have plenty of time to film your boyfriend. now, you want to make him cum again.

! please do not repost, copy or translate my works

! keep in mind english is not my first language, i apologise in advance for any mistakes i’ve might missed

[y-rhywbeth2]

D&D Vampire Lore Dump #1

Feeding and Diet It's actually more complicated than just "they bite you and eat your blood." Plus what they're able to eat; how often they need to eat; what happens to you if they bite you and what happens to them if they don't feed- spoiler: it's unpleasant. Incidentally, you should reload and kill Cazador again.

(I was comparing stuff across editions and compiling it into something more coherent and then figured I'd info dump about it in case my fixations are useful to somebody out there.)

DISCLAIMER: There are two things to note about the lore presented here: First, while the standard stat block in the monster manual is the default, in terms of lore vampires have this annoying tendency to be incredibly, stupidly varied. They are magical monstrosities ruled by the power of symbolism and superstition above anything else.

The next is that D&D is decades old, spans five editions, several settings and hundreds of writers. One guy establishes a piece of lore, and then the next picks it up goes "nah" and writes something else. I collected info from four different source books, all from different editions, which naturally don't entirely agree on how vampires work. Lore never stays consistent and may contradict itself. You may see information somewhere else from a source I don't have that contradicts what I wrote here. If you read this and like some of this stuff but not other bits, take the good and ditch the rest.

Basically, in D&D, canon is what you decide it is.

Feeding | "Biology" | Hierarchy | Weaknesses and Cures | Psychology

They only need to feed once in a 24 hour period. Vampires can survive between 3-9 months of starvation, but it's a terrible idea. -

There are three different categories of "Undead Hunger." Vampires have two of them and actually need to consume more than one thing to stay "healthy": Blood and life force. -

The blood is obvious. This is categorised as a "diet dependency." It's required to preserve their bodies and powers, and without it their powers* are suppressed as their bodies begin to shut down. *This refers to the powers a vampire gains with age; they cannot lose power they had as a newborn (the base stat blocks given for vampires and spawn given in the monster manual) A vampire requires the equivalent of 12 hit points of blood a day, or it begins to revert into a corpse-like state. Mentally they slowly regress into a desperate, mindless animal frenzy where they'll kill and drain anything containing blood they can get their hands on. Ultimately, if they don't get any blood then they revert into a corpse and they're trapped in their own body as it begins to wither and mummify. They're trapped in a coma, vaguely aware of the passing of time in flashes of awareness until somehow they are fed blood. If they ever wake up again, they will probably wake up feral and absolutely ravenous. -

Vampires rely on the victim's blood pressure to expel blood from the wound they create, lapping and mouthing at the wound rather than actually sucking on it. Being bitten is a highly pleasurable experience that victims can't help but desire, even when they know they shouldn't. -

While the damage done remains, the wounds from a Vampire bite closes itself quickly after the feeding (assuming you're still alive). It does however leave a mark. The bite mark itself is often "less than half an inch in length", and leaves behind a significant bruise that causes no pain or sensitivity to touch. Other side effects include fatigue and a weakened immune system. -

Vampires typically target sleeping victims (less likely to fight back) and favour the blood of their own race above others. So theoretically, Astarion finds elf blood tastes best. -

Drinking animal blood tastes bland and is health-wise akin to drinking tainted water: yes it might keep you alive in desperate times, but it's ultimately bad for you and will probably make you ill. That said, it has no mechanical detriments and a vampire that's forced to live on animal blood will be just as strong as its kin, but considerably bad tempered about it. -

A vampire's secondary feeding requirement is called an "inescapable craving", which means that if a vampire doesn't get that fix then their hunger begins to devour them instead. The pain is described as a spike boring into the vampire's brain, obscuring their awareness. They begin to obsess over feeding to the exclusion of everything else, they become willing to take ridiculous levels of risk to stop the hunger as they become more and more desperate. As they are consumed they become progressively more feral until they're just a rampaging mindless horror driven only by horrific hunger. For vampires, their inescapable craving is life force, which a vampire leeches from their prey through touch leaving the victim weak. Direct skin contact isn't required, if you're wearing full plate and/or the vampire is wearing gloves and they lay a hand on you they can still drain you. Mechanically these were combat abilities, energy/level draining occurred when a vampire struck a target with their own body (usually their hands). Before 5e hit them with a nerf bat, vampires could permanently weaken you this way (you could lose character levels from this). 5e also seems to have rolled life drain into the biting, so a vampire can consume your blood and energy at the same time. -

Post feeding, a vampire starts to look alive. Their skin is flushed and warm and they feel elated and energetic. In contrast, a vampire that hasn't been feeding properly becomes more corpse like and feels "sluggish" (I'm interpreting that as flu-like symptoms). It's purely emotional however, the vampire is no less capable and dangerous and suffers no mechanical penalties. -

Vampires can feed on other vampires, which is actually more filling than living humanoid blood and gives them the ability to communicate telepathically for a few hours. They don't like it though. If a vampire drinks from another vampire then they can be controlled by that vampire and the link forces them to feel affection for each other against their will until it wears off. The results of both vampires in question feeding on each other is described as "debilitating" since they both paradoxically become enslaved to the other's will and forced to "love" each other creating an absolute dysfunctional mess of control, obsession and resentment. The good news is that it only lasts a few hours. -

Some vampires can eat regular food (no nutritional value in it for them) while others would regurgitate it if they tried. As they retain their tongues, vampires can also taste food. That said, it's a bad idea for them to eat garlic, even if they can eat solid food. -

Some kinds of vampires don't drink blood. There's all kinds of weird and wonderful stuff a vampire might be required to consume instead. Spinal fluid stands out. Or the bit about ones who drain the ocular fluid from your eyes. Gale might find interesting things to talk about with the magic eating ones who prey on mages. They're much less common, probably something to do with most people not finding that very sexy. I don't think any of them exist on Toril.

[gars-weaponeer]

The Bullied Bad Batch?

Here comes a controversial take...

But It kind of always rubbed me the wrong way to see the first episode of the bad batch and have this narrative that they have always been bullied by the other clones for being different, like some sort of Star wars Loosers club.

It really doesn't makes sense to me. Specially comparing them to their episodes in the Clone Wars.

For starters: Sure, they are called "defective clones"... but are they really? Nothing about their mutations gives them an actual defect or a weakness. The closest we have is Tech's intelligence being so great he is way to logical about everything and lacks in social interactions.

But other than that the fact that Hunter's heightened senses overwhelm him sometimes, or that Crosshair's eyes are sensitive to bright lights, or that Wrecker's Muscles are in constant pain are all fandom made.

They were not just "born defective" like 99 and the Kaminoans decided to let them out into the world see what happened. They presented "some" mutations and the Kaminoans enhanced said mutations to make them perfect soldiers.

They are an an experimental group sure, but they were treated as a clone comando squad, an elite group.

I find it very hard to believe that an "elite group" would be bullied for being "different". It's like saying the Delta Squad was bullied by the other ct troopers.

Not to mention, their actitudes in their clone wars episodes are more akin to bullies. They are arrogant, They pick up fights with the other clones, They undermined the other clone's thoughts, ideas and even abilities. They don't follow orders and do things their own unorthodox way. Hell! even the "Reg" name they give regular clones sounds almost like an insult or a slur.

So why did we suddenly pass from: "They are just Regs, they cannot compare with us" to "The regs are calling us names, we have no friends in the school cafeteria." ???

-But Weaponeer! - I hear you say - They are called the Bad Batch because they were born defective.

And to that I say, NO. They are called "Clone force 99" because they were born with mutations (like 99). They call themselves "The Bad Batch" because they are a group of edgy, rebellious, younger clones that are aware they are different from the rest.

Let's not forget that deleted scene where we learn the Bad Batch had some nose art of a sexy Padme. That reads: "Born to be Bad."

Just so you can understand their actual energy.

That said, I think the writers should have kept the Bully Bad Batch on their series. At least on the first episode, when they are still in the GAR.

IMAGEN THIS:

The Bad Batch is an experimental group that is very important for the Kaminoans. So much so that they are given preferential treatment over regular clones, even comando clones.

They have their own personal barracks, They have their own ship that is theirs, They are allowed to do as they wish during missions since Kaminoans want to test them and record their evolution.

The Bad Batch know they are the Kaminoan's favorites, so does the regular clones and they hate it.

To regular clones it feels unfair. They are the ones that run into the battlefield and fight endless hoards of droids daily just to have this bunch of reckless clones rush in, do whatever they want, explode something and receive all the praise.

Not to mention that The Bad Batch is not nice about it either, they are arrogant, they boast, they call the other clones "regs" and compare their superior abilities to the rest constantly, almost like they forget they are clones too.

Worst part is, the Regs can't really do anything about it. Pick up fights with them always ends up badly. Wrecker is strong enough to send any reg to the med bay with one punch, Hunter can always anticipate punches and Crosshair has excellent aim when throwing the cafeteria trays.

The only one there that does not condone the behavior of his peers is Echo. Despite being a Reg he was accepted by the Bad Batch thanks to his unusual appearance and skills, but Echo is constantly trying to stop them from being mean to his other brothers. Not that it does much as the Bad Batch still see Echo as the "newbie" despite him being an ARC trooper.

But they are not bad people, they do have a sense of duty and honor like any other clone and they wouldn't really cause real harm to an ally. They see Omega and treat her with care, after all she is a young girl and they are not animals. They see the "insurgents" they were sent to kill and of course they cannot do that! Killing innocents? that's not what they do!

When they rebel from the Empire and go AWOL their whole world comes crashing down.

They no longer have the protection of the Kaminoans, they are no longer the favorite clones, now they are the traitors, hunted down not only by the whole empire but by one of their own.

This sudden change would make the batch wake up and turn from unruly teens to mature adults.

Hunter now has to be the mature leader and guide his team to safety in a harsh galaxy that keeps getting more and more dangerous. He has to be more careful, to a point that he is almost afraid of taking risks, specially since he has Omega to worry about. It would give him some character arc in which he passes from being carefree, to overly cautious, to learning to balance both.

Tech would learn that even though he has all the theory, he doesn't have all the practice. Nothing is as easy as just saying it, and things that he used to take for granted are now being mayor issues.

Echo's knowledge of the galaxy and skill would be more useful to his peers, but his tendency to distrust causes him problems in the long run. Not to mention he would still not be happy about sitting down doing nothing while his brothers are suffering at the hands of the Empire.

While Wrecker is having the hardest time adapting to their new life, being the more immature of the bunch. He learns that he cannot be as reckless as he has always been during their time in the GAR, specially when they have Omega to worry about.

That's Right people! MORE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT! I think it would have been interesting to see that sort of dynamic.

┕━━━━━━━━━━━━ ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ━━━━━━━━━━━━┙

Then Again, these are just my thoughts. You are welcome to agree, add your own thoughts or just ignore them if they are not your cup of tea.

If you reached all the way down here thank you for reading ♥

And may the force be with you.

[eww-y-tho]

Colin VS Toxic Masculinity and Why Penelope Had to Reveal Herself as LW

I made a previous post with my two cents on why the idea of them both figuring out a solution to LW was an inferior concept to just Penelope figuring it out on her own, but it was small and I want to go more in-depth.

So, in order to grasp ✨my perspective✨ of the story, we first need to talk about Colin's struggles with toxic masculinity and his inferiority complex.

Naturally, Colin is a hopeless romantic with demisexual tendencies and a more prominent softness compared to other male leads. He's a bit dense (I say with love) until he figures out what he wants and how he's going to get it, and then he is a man of frankly ridiculous action. He's a sensitive boi who has a difficult time fitting in with the other men in his life and being taken seriously by his family, as he puts it himself. An empath, lol.

Honestly, Colin being a "rake" was an integral point of his character arc, and if you haven't picked up on that text by now, I would ask where your media literacy is. Violet put it best, he's putting on armour to protect himself from the way that society treats his character, and naturally, he develops a small, albeit persistent inferiority complex because of this. He doesn't feel like he's providing enough to the people around him because of toxic masculine standards.

I honestly think it's been with him since s1, and Pen is the only person who could bring these thoughts to the surface, which is why it comes to a head in s3 p2.

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

In his efforts to fit in, he does some questionable things, such as the 2x8 comment, which he regrets as soon as he realizes how much damage it has done to his relationship with Pen. He hangs around with douchebags that he can't stand because he feels a need to conform and "be the kind of man society expects him to be."

But he also absorbs toxic masculine tendencies in the process. His gut instinct of general envy that a woman, Pen, is more successful than him (I hate to put it that bluntly, but that's how I took it), asking for her to quit LW because of these reasons, completely disregarding Pen's autonomy and her perspective by blindly charging forward to stop Cressida's blackmail, among other smaller things.

It's kind of ✨subtle✨, but I know it's there.

Pair that with his inferiority complex and you have a man who is trying to put down Penelope to his level, if that makes sense. By this point, he's already conquered the idea that he needs to conform by the way he cuts off his toxic friend group, but he isn't completely free from the systemic perspective.

Therefore, the idea that Pen would need him in order to find a solution to her problem confirms that toxic masculine trait. Let's be real, Penelope didn't and doesn't need Colin in order to help with LW's problems. She's managed without him before and will continue to manage it by herself. This is not to say that Penelope doesn't have an issue with accepting help from others and feeling the need to handle her problems alone because of her old situation, but she takes the emotionally intelligent move by LITERALLY voicing what she needs from Colin and their relationship.

She needs his companionship, she needs his love, she needs a rock she can come to at the end of the day and be able to depend on. She does not need him to do anything for LW, as it is a part of her identity and an accomplishment that she is proud of and will not let go of. Colin cannot make the demand that she drop everything she's worked for for him.

And that's how relationships work in the real world. You have things you are willing to let go of, and some things you are not. Your partner has to accept those boundaries you have set or leave the relationship, and you shouldn't have to abandon those things in order to get the person of your dreams, because that would make it a toxic relationship from the start and will most likely end in you losing parts of yourself in your partner.

Anyway, all this is to say that Penelope had to get out of her situation by her own means and with full autonomy on what she wanted to do to finish off her character arc.

And Colin needed to realize that his envy is a baseless emotion that simply has no value compared to the woman he knows her as. A strong, independent woman who doesn't need him to do things for her. He also needed to humble himself and see the way that LW is not competing with him, but a part of her. They both demonstrate that what they need from the relationship is not transactional in nature, but rather a shared bond powered by love.

I understand the idea of wanting them to both find a way out of the blackmail as a team, but again, that's explicitly not what they need from each other, and why I think this perspective is again a misunderstanding of their character arcs.

I think I've articulated this the best way I can, but I do know I wanted to say some other things. I'm tired tho, so yeah, ending it here.

Hopefully, this made sense.

Bai!

[y3ahwhat3ver]

Been seeing this over and over and it's sort of been annoying me but. Valentino and Alastor are not even remotely comparable. Like. Look I may be a bit biased bc I like Alastor and don't like Valentino beyond the funny moments he has but like.

Okay. Alastor sucks. Like he's a violent dickhead but part of that is that he's very restrained in his violence. The only times we see him do anything outright violent are when he/the hotel are under attack and then his one moment with Husk. His relationship with Husk gets brought up a lot when people make the comparison but to me like.

Throughout the show you see Husk talk shit to Alastor, literally all of the time. He heavily dislikes him (in my opinion a major part of that is bitterness over losing his own title just to become subservient to Al) but he doesn't ever really seem scared of him, beyond the one moment. He and Alastor have known eachother for years and it's pretty clear to me that Alastor sort of just. Let's him say whatever as long as he doesn't hit A Limit. Alastor's own contract is something he's very clearly sensitive about and Husk bringing that up when he was already in a bad mood. I'm not saying the way he treats Husk in this scene is good, or right but just that it makes sense in context.

I guess what really does it for me is Niffty as well? Like it's so clear she loves Al, quite literally crawling all over him and crowning him. They have a very sweet relationship in the show. She's comfortable enough with him to freely speak about her own feelings ("I really like them Alastor. They let me put on roach puppet shows without booing")

You just get the sense that like. Alastors relationship with his contractee's is. Maybe not the most outright friendly but it's not inherently violent.

And then you compare that to Valentino. Valentino is violent, but worse he's impulsive. And also kind of an idiot. Like the first time we see him it's Velvette calling Vox to come deal with him bc the man is on a rampage and killing her models. He has to be talked down from going to the hotel and killing everyone there. (Already a bad idea image wise but like. With the literal Princess of Hell in that hotel it's like. What was your plan for after that Val. What was your plan for after you attacked the only heir to the throne, the literal daughter of the devil. Christ.)

The difference here is that the only contractee we see him interact with is Angel Dust, and their relationship is fraught with abuse. Physical, sexual, and psychological. Valentino enables his drug addiction because it makes Angel more compliant. Even when he is not being violent towards Angel himself, he's still perpetuating that violence through the work he has Angel do (literally the everything about Poison makes me kind of sick to watch. Tbh, like great song but i cannot watch the mv without getting kind of upset. And look there's a conversation in there about sex work, and specifically SAFE sex work but that's not really what this post is.)

Like. There's literally a line in the show about Angel being WATERBOARDED at work. ("You know, Val, he's into that waterboarding shit now - I don't know, it's a kink." - episode 6 welcome to heaven) And this is JUST Angel's perspective. You don't see Valentino's other contracts but from the way Angel is treated, it's kind of clear that he does shit like this to anyone under his control, and thus anyone who cannot tell him No.

Look. You get the sense that Alastor is a dick, but there's no implication that he takes Niffty and Husk out back and beats them when he's aggravated (with them or otherwise.) We literally watch Valentino assault and threaten Angel because there is someone stronger than him [Valentino] who is trying to get him out of work.

[Edit (June 2nd, 2024): I want to clarify that I do like loser, baby and also Husk as a character and this is more abt my grievances with fandom comparing the two. In series, Angel needed that discussion with Husk and even thought their situations aren't 1:1 or even really that similar, it's still clear that Husks attempt to like. Empathize with him worked for Angel. That is all, thank u and goodnight]

[atarahderek]

Today on: INFP or ADHD?

Perspective taking

I get weekly bonus traits from Genomelink, and this week's trait is as follows:

I find this to be accurate to me. I can see things from others' viewpoints, but that's a skill I had to learn. It does not come naturally to me. So I have to consciously remind myself to slow down and listen, and try to understand where the other person is coming from.

Believe it or not, that is an Fi thing (ftr, I call it "eff-aye," not "fie" or "fee").

Or possibly a neurodivergent thing.

Let me explain...

Fi is kind of self-centered.

Introverted Feeling (Fi) is an analytical function, but what it analyzes are emotions and emotional experiences. Especially in the user. It is the idealism function and has its own idea of how the world should be. It is the moral core function. It is the function that makes the user adhere firmly and stubbornly to their own identity. It does not like compromise, especially on what it perceives to be a moral issue. The Fi-dom in particular has their worldview set in stone by a certain age and they'll be darned if they so much as entertain someone else's. This is why we're kind of easy to offend. Pick on us directly and we'll take it because we value harmony and being able to control our own emotions (we save them for when we want to write you as a character in our stories and then brutally kill that character off). But attack some person, ideal or issue near and dear to our hearts and we'll fly off the handle. And often it does not matter whether that attack is coming from pain or how calm and respectful your argument is. All we see is the attack itself and we lash out. We have to learn not to do this.

Contrast Ti, which is analytical on all fronts and will take an interest in other perspectives purely because they exist. Or Fe, which hears out the other side because it literally cannot do anything else. As the empath function, it feels what the other person is feeling the moment the user is in close proximity to the other person. And it seeks to know more about the source of that feeling so that it can manipulate it to its advantage (Fe can be devious). So for Fe/Ti users, perspective taking comes as naturally as breathing.

So the fact that perspective taking is not an inborn skill for me is definitely the result of my dominant Fi. Unless it's actually the result of ADHD. Because...

ADHD has rejection and anger management issues.

People with ADHD tend to have short tempers compared to neurotypicals. This is because the ADHD brain can be overwhelmed with too much information due to limited working memory (the RAM of the brain) and a deficit in the hormone dopamine which is required to motivate the brain to get to work processing information. This causes the individual to lash out in an attempt to get the flow of information to slow down, organize itself or cease altogether. People with ADHD also internalize all kinds of negative messages about themselves, and that can cause outbursts of anger. When you're angry and overwhelmed with information that you physically cannot process properly, you tend not to listen to people around you. Even if you could focus on what they're saying, you're not going to really hear them when your working memory is overloaded.

ADHD also causes rejection sensitivity. This can create problems in an argument. A person with ADHD can do just fine in a civilized debate. But if the debate becomes a heated argument, ADHD starts to get in the way. The opponent starts to take offense and go on the attack, and that's a clear case of rejection of the other person's viewpoint. This can cause the person with ADHD to either respond in kind and escalate the conflict, or shut down altogether and walk away. Neither response allows the person to hear their opponent's perspective. And it can permanently damage the relationship, as the person with ADHD will often try to avoid the person who rejected their viewpoint so as to avoid a similar conflict.

Undiagnosed neurodivergent people can sometimes be clued into their condition by their inability to consistently practice perception taking. Even if it's a skill they've worked hard to learn, the fact that they still fail at it sometimes can indicate that there's something going on upstairs that's a little more beyond their control than they realize. There may be an underlying cause to your inability to see through another's eyes, and it's not because of some personality flaw.

What do you think? INFP or ADHD?

For my part, I think both my dominant Fi and my ADHD are contributing factors in having to learn and actively practice perspective taking rather than coming by it naturally. I have learned how to do it, and yet I still struggle sometimes to do it when I'm blinded by anger. It's a trap anyone can fall into, but it's definitely something I think the Fi user with ADHD is the most prone to.

[waterfallofspace]

A Little Game, A Lot Of Torture. 

The one in which G/ojo has been a bit of a (loveable) prick, so his friends decide to hold a little contest to see who can get him back the best. Contest rules? Whoever makes him sneeze the most in one attempt wins, you can’t get his help, you can only use one method. Let the games begin! (Do I have requests I should be working on instead? Yes. Was this idea haunting my every waking hour until I finally agreed to write it? Also yes. I promise I’ll get back to requests tomorrow &lt;;3) Takes a minute to get into heavy snz stuff, but hopefully it's still enjoyable! (credits to @snzdreams for the breathtaking headcanon that even talking about sneezing gets G/ojo going, and I hope it’s okay that I borrowed your genius to use in this <3 and doubly hope it's okay that I tagged you in it <33) Also I want to clarify: while they were all in the same class in highschool, this is set post-graduation, imagining a future where they all still hang out. (AU technically I guess haha~) Just making it clear, everyone in this story is meant to be an adult. Picture early 20’s. Characters: G/eto, S/hoko, and G/ojo. Plus a bit of S/atosugu Word Count: 4.1k (whoops-)

(References to swearing in case anyone doesn't like that!)

~~~~~~~

The rules were agreed upon the day before, Geto insisting that they needed to be clear.

Rule #1: You only get one attempt. If you fail, or he manages to avoid/subdue the attempt, it’s over. You don’t get a second try. If you get subpar results, same as before, no second tries. Amendment added by Shoko: number of sneezes only counts from the first couple minutes. If said attempt results in sneezing for the rest of the day, those are not to be counted.

Rule #2: Gojo is not to be informed of this, or asked for assistance of any kind. You cannot ask him for a list of what makes him most sneezy, you must use your knowledge of him to come up with your own methodology. 

And finally, Rule #3: You can only use one method. Said ‘method’ can include multiple inducing tools, so long as they’re considered one ‘attempt’. Ie. Multiple scented candles at once, or a bouquet of flowers are both considered one method. However, flowers and candles at the same time would be considered two. Amendment added by Geto: Helping him along with words doesn’t count as a method, and is therefore fair play. 

With those in place, Geto and Shoko got to work, each with an idea in mind. 

In order to not taint results the attempts will be held three days apart to give Gojo’s nose time to get back to baseline before the next attempt begins. Shoko is up first. Let the games begin! 

~~ Shoko’s Attempt ~~

‘I’m at a disadvantage. I know Gojo, he’s my friend, they both are, but I’ll never know him the way Geto does. He’ll always know more of Gojo’s quirks, especially since they’re so obviously in love. They both deny it, but the looks they share when they think no one can see tells a different story. If not dating, the feeling is at least mutual.’ 

Shoko pauses her musing, letting a smile take over as she waves to the boys, starting her approach with a hand in her bag. ‘Always together, even when I’m not around. I know they care for me, but the bond they share will always be one step deeper.’ Despite this, she has a plan. Earlier she wrote out a list of what she remembers Gojo showing reactions to in the past, eliminating anything less than a full attack. 

‘He’s quite sensitive, it doesn’t take much to set him off, but getting an actual fit from him is a touch more rare. Normally he has quite the exaggerated buildups, long and hitchy, which he makes a lot of noise about, but the actual sneezing is minimal. At least, compared to the results I’m looking for. No, I need something more than a simple sensitivity. If it was Geto I’d blow smoke in his face, but that’d only prompt a minor reaction out of Gojo.’ 

“Hiya Shoko, take a seat! Geto here was just sharing the mochi he bought!”

“I bought it for myself, you just stole half when my back was turned.” 

“Come on, we both know if you put something sweet in front of me I’m gonna eat it.” 

Shoko seats herself next to Gojo, sharing a glance with Geto when he’s distracted by the sweets once more. A darker tone dips into Gojo’s voice as he lets his sunglasses fall so Geto can see his eyes, a mischievous haze clouding them. 

“You knew the risks, now you pay the price.”

“The price being my mochi?”

“Exactly! Now you’re catching on~.”

With that, Gojo grabs another one, laughter bubbling out as Geto attempts, and fails, to smack his hand away. However, before he can pop it in his mouth, he freezes, hand inches from his face. His breath catches, nose twitching. Shoko finds Geto’s eyes darting over to her, and she offers a slight shake of the head. ‘Nope, not my attempt, this is all him.’ Geto starts to speak, eyes flickering back over to Gojo.

“You alri-” 

“heHh-! hah’adJSHhh’iew-! hep’gshh’iew-!”

“Blessings.” 

“Guhhh- thank you.”

Shoko takes her turn to speak, eager to ascertain any possible advantages. ‘If he’s sick his nose will be extra sensitive, and I may be able to cinch this win. Especially given Geto needing to wait three days, ideally the window of sensitivity will have passed.’ 

“Feeling okay?” 

“Indeed. This is just the price I must pay for being so talented- huEH’djZShh’uu-! I can't be perfect in every aspect, that would just be unfair!”

“Come again?”

Geto rolls his eyes, gesturing to the sky as he turns his gaze back to Shoko once more. Gojo meanwhile wipes a few tears from his cheeks, groaning lightly at the quickly increasing watery nature of his eyes. 

“He’s just allergic to the sun.” 

“I am not allergic- I’m just a tad sensitive to bright lights. Christ this is annoying.”

“Was the mochi really worth it?”

“Suguru Geto, don’t you talk like that! Mochi is always worth it!”

The eagerness has quickly faded out, Shoko letting an airy sigh press out between her pursed lips. ‘Right, I did know about this. I believe it’s called a photic sneeze response? He’s had it for as long as I’ve known him, though I believe he said it’s gotten worse the more he wears those glasses. Blocking out the light so much of the time only adds to his sensitivity when it inevitably breaks through. However, it causes very few sneezes, he said the main issue is his eyes watering.’

“If you touch the last piece I’m making you buy me a new one.”

“Aw- that’s not faiiiir!” 

“Boys, boys, let’s not fight. I have a better solution.”

With that, Shoko swipes the last piece, grinning at the complaints from the guys as she places it against her tongue, savouring the sweet taste. Her mind dips back to her plan as Gojo starts to whine about being hungry again. 

‘He’s incredibly sensitive, even the mention of sneezing is enough to get his nose itchy. Describing how much it must tickle is fair game, but on its own, pretty ineffective. He’s annoyingly good at holding back when he wants to be, so if he catches on that sneezing is what I want, he’ll do everything in his power not to. I just need him to think I’m teasing him for his reaction, can’t let him read deeper into my motives.’ 

“Shoko?” 

“Hm?”

Her name pulls her back into the conversation, both Geto and Gojo watching her closely, a lopsided grin spreading across Gojo’s mouth. ‘Oh, I’m going to enjoy wiping that smug look off his pretty-boy face.’  Gojo speaks up again, Geto’s eyes following her movements as she casually lets her hand dip back into her bag. 

“I was asking if you’d want to come with us to the mall, DiverCity specifically? I’ve been craving chocolates that they sell at one of the stores for days.” 

“Funny you mention it, I was just thinking about that place earlier. I’d love to come, but I have an assignment. Next time though, yeah?”

“Aw fiiiine, but Geto, you’re still coming, right?”

“Sure, why not. I could use a few things.” 

Shoko tunes out again, hand tightening around a bottle as she lets a smirk spread across her face. ‘Funny he mentions the mall, seeing as that’s exactly where I got my method from.’ The last time they’d gone together she’d been showing him around a store he’d never been to before. It specializes in calming methods, and given how stressful being a Jujutsu sorcerer can be, she finds herself drawn there often.

An employee next to them had been showing a few people a new pillow spray, and as soon as they’d spritzed it, Gojo had been bent over into his arm with a rapid fit. She’d had to drag him out of the store. ‘Quite embarrassing at the time, especially given how whiny he can get during an attack, but now? Now I’ll get to use that spray to get payback.’ 

“Hey, Gojo.”

She cuts into their conversation with ease, used to interrupting them. ‘With those two, someone is always talking. If you wait for a pause, you’ll never get a word in.’ Gojo turns to her with a curious look, across the blanket Geto mimics it, a hint of something deeper flashing through his eyes. She gives him a quick nod, smirk quickly spreading across his face as he attempts to cover it. 

“You know how I’ve been having a lot of trouble sleeping recently? I found a new spray that has been really helping. I thought you might want to have a look at it, I know you sometimes struggle with insomnia too.”

“Oh, that’s kind of you, yeah show me- show me- show me!” 

‘Kind isn’t quite the word I’d use, but I appreciate your excitement anyways.’ Pulling it from her bag, she’s unsurprised at the lack of recognition in his eyes. He’s never been one for cataloging irrelevant information, and for some reason he’d decided keeping a list of everything that sets him off was irrelevant.

Taking off the cap, she gives him an open smile, before spraying it right in front of his face. ‘Can’t risk actually hitting him, that would be too suspicious, but I want it to get as close to his nose as possible.’ The result, much to her delight, is instantaneous. 

“hhaHhHH-! Wh- whAhht- what kind of sp- spra… sprayisthat… heH’gnDZShh’uuhh-!”

“Something wrong?”

“I think I’m- eH’GNDZSHh’uu-! I think- heHASIhh’oo-! ah’gehhzshh’iew-!”

“Are you okay?” 

Geto’s watching carefully, Shoko’s sure he’s keeping count in his head. Still, needing Gojo to believe her facade, she offers sympathy, pulling a travel pack of tissues out of her bag. ‘Tissues that just so happen to be sprayed with the allergen. Still only counts as one method, according to the rules.’

“Y- yeah- hAgzshh’uu-! knDzshh’iee-! Oh, scus- scuseme- heHhh-!”

“Here, take these, you sound like you need them.”

“Th… thhhehHh- thank you- hH’GUHzshh’oo-! aiYISHH’oo-! aHH’DNGZSHh’uu-! Oh god…” 

“Blessings, Gojo.”

Finally speaking up, Geto catches Shoko’s eye and mouths ‘nine’. She shoots back a whispered ‘so far’, catching a smile in response. Gojo’s too busy tearing into the pack of tissues to notice any of this, bringing one to his nose as he gets a pause in the sneezing. He manages to blow, breathing a sigh of relief, instantly cut short by an itchy inhale. 

“heAHh-! hH’DnZShh’uu-! AYISHH’oo-! KETZSHHH’oo-! What the- henGT-! ainGT’shoo-!”

“Blessings indeed, Gojo. Are you alright?”

“The ti- tihhhckle- heH’kNGDT-! haAHh-! eh’dnZZShh’oo-! Scuse me- the tickle got wo- wo… worse… I’m… I’m gonna… heHh-!” 

Shoko smirks as the tears start pooling in Gojo’s eyes, his nose quivering as it starts to flush a brilliant shade of pink. ‘Time to implement phase two: suggestions. Just gotta be careful not to tip my hand. He’s attempting to stifle, which will only help, it only makes the tickle stronger.’

“You must be allergic to the spray, I’m so sorry, I had no idea!”

“heH-! hh’gndJSHH’uu-! AIYShhh’iew-! heH’DJZSHh’uu-!”

“Oh, bless you. Sounds really itchy, are yo-” 

“hH’DJEZSHh’aa-! Sh- Shoko- waaitt… ahh’keTShh’oo-!” 

“-you feeling it? The burning sensation-” 

“eh’GnDJZSH’aahh-! hAHh’inGKt-!”

“-filling your sinuses? Like a feather, gen-"

“nGEHT’choo-! hePt’choo-! eNgEHP’choo-!”

“-gently brushing the inside of your nose?” 

“heAIISHH’uhh-! eh’GdJZShh’uu-! I need… I’m gonna… I can’t…!”

Geto gives her a pointed look, lightly tapping his wrist. ‘Time’s almost up, time for the home stretch. Gotta make sure I get one last fit outta him. I know exactly what to say.’ Gojo’s nose is pressed into his wrist, trembling with allergic need as the tears keep flowing down his cheeks, seemingly making the tickle even worse as they brush up against the edges of his nose.

“I’m so sorry, Gojo. If I’d have known you were this allergic I never would have sprayed it so close to your nose! I mean, the droplets must have just floated through the air, gently landing on your skin, right on the tip of your nose-”

“Cru- Cruel Shoko- hEH’EDZSHH’uu-! eh’KTZSHhh’aa-! aiYISHH-keATzhh’oo-!” 

With that, Shoko meets Geto’s eyes one last time, mouthing ‘how many?’, quite satisfied by the ‘thirty-two’ she receives in return. Her satisfaction only rises as Gojo ducks into his arm with another tightly stifled burst, Geto raising an eyebrow at the display.

“hH’KNGt’choo-! iNGt’choo-! hah’DNGt’choo-!”

“Blessings, Gojo.”

“Snff- Thank you, Geto. Guhhh… I’m gonna be itc- itchy… hh’GNZshh’iew-! for the rest of the day.” 

Shoko pulls the tissues from Gojo’s lap while his focus is aimed towards Geto, replacing them with a second pack from her bag. ‘As fun as it is to watch you suffer, my attempt is over, no need to prolong the exposure. This reaction is gonna last for most of the day anyways.’ 

“Blow again, it might help dispel some of the allergen.”

“Yeah, good- eh’aISHH’uu-! good idea. Ya know, that may help you sleep, but I’m- heHh-! hEZSHHH’aa-! I’m getting the vague notion it wouldn’t do the same for me.” 

Geto laughs, a smile tearing through Gojo’s itchy face at the sound, Shoko soon joining in. ‘Always one step removed, just outside the joke, but that’s okay. At least for now, I’m in on the joke while Gojo isn’t. I can live with that.’

Final Results: Thirty-Two (32) sneezes from Shoko’s Attempt. Method Use/Application: Linen spray Gojo is allergic to, sprayed in front of face/on tissues presented to him. Sneezy talk was also implemented, increasing success. 

~~ Geto’s Attempt ~~

‘Shoko’s try yielded better results then I was counting on. I may know more about Gojo but some facts escape even my grasp. I had no idea he was so allergic to that spray. However, that wasn’t what set her apart, it’s her cunning. She explained to me after that she sprayed it on the tissues. Truly genius, I would’ve never thought of that.’ 

This time it’s Geto’s turn to approach the duo, eyes closing as he smiles, Gojo giving a shout and Shoko putting out her cigarette. ‘I guess she doesn’t want to be called out for interference. It’s no matter, I don’t plan on letting anything distract me from my attempt. I didn’t have to think long about what to use, just how to best utilize it.’ 

“Geto! Shoko was just telling me about a new type of chocolate she saw the other day! Can we go buy some? Pleaaaase? Pretty please?”

“You still owe me for the last pack I bought you.”

“Aw, come on, you know you wannaaa~! You don’t wanna deny me of my happiness, do you?”

“You can have happiness without chocolates, Gojo.”

“How could you say such things?”

Gojo lets a pout spread over his face, lightly huffing as he leans his head against Geto’s shoulder. ‘Dramatic as always. Though, I guess that’s the reason we came up with this little challenge in the first place. One I’m sure to win with what I have planned.’ His mind starts to drift back to the first time he got to witness Gojo and lavender in the same room. 

They’d been in a meeting together, the higher ups needing something Geto can’t recall now. It’s not of importance, even at the time it was one of the last things on his mind. Front and center was Gojo’s losing battle against the vase of lavender sitting almost mocking him on the table.

Normally, should the situation call for it, Gojo could hold off an allergy attack for hours, or at least upwards of twenty minutes. However, against the lavender he lasted no more than three, needing to leave the room just after seven because he was no longer able to form full words between the sneezing. The higher ups had been quite irritated, but today it would serve Geto well.

“Earth to Geto? Suuuguruuu? You there?”

“Huh?”

“Jeez, what is it with you two lately? Did I miss something, or is it just ‘stare off into the abyss with a smile creeping at your mouth’ season?”

“Sorry, I was just reminiscing.”

“Any particular memory you want to share, Geto?”

Shoko offers, eyes flashing with mischief as Geto sends a dark look in her direction, quickly replaced by a smile as she playfully sticks out her tongue.

“Not at the moment.”

“Oh, I know! Why don’t we play ‘share your favourite memory of Gojo’!” 

“Yeah, no.”

“Aw Shoko, you’re no fun.”

Geto chuckles, ruffling Gojo’s hair as he gazes up from behind his sunglasses. ‘Just placing the lavender near him wouldn’t work. He could either leave the area, or the attack might not surpass thirty-two. The reason it had such a severe effect in the meeting was likely do to the pollen having a chance to gather in that tiny room.’

“Gojo, I have a gift for you.”

“A gift? You shouldn’t have!” 

“Well if you don’t want i-”

“Hey, woah-woah-woah- of course I want it-!”

Reaching into his bag, Geto starts to set his plan in motion. ‘My best chance is getting some form of lavender where I can get it near his nose, close enough for the pollen to have a chance to float around him, but not obvious enough that he’ll just avoid it. I think this is the perfect solution.’

Making direct eye contact with Shoko, Geto sends her a message clearly. ‘My attempt is about to begin, get ready’. His hands grip around the present, placing it gently on Gojo’s head, fighting a smirk at the joy filling Gojo’s eyes.

“A flower crown!?” 

“Yes. You showed me how to make them a while back, and so I made this one myself. I thought you might appreciate it-”

“Suguru… I love it! What kind of flowers are these?”

“Mostly sakura, though I did add a few other plants I found in the area to tie it together.” 

‘If I just used lavender he’d simply take it off when he started sneezing. However, given that it’s not a type of flower he’s allergic to, it won’t be his first thought. Because of that, he’ll be too focused on sneezing to worry about removing it, letting the hidden lavender keep sending wafts of pollen down into his face. Plus, I made sure the sakura was quite pollen soaked. He’s not allergic, but with his nose already being set off from the lavender, the sickly sweet smell is sure to prompt a few extra sneezes.’  

“It’s bea- hEHh-! Oh, scuse me. It’s beautiful.”

“You alright?”

“Yeah, just thou- ahHh-! Hehh… thought I was… o- oh… I am…. I’m- hH’DjZEShh’oo-!”

“Blessings, Satoru.” 

“iHh’kETChh’uu-! S- sorry I… eH’DtjZSh’iew-! hEh’kezzchh-aiyshhh’aa-knGT’choo-!”

“And again.” 

A glance over to Shoko tells Geto she’s keeping track, fingers tapping against the railing she’s leaning on with every sneeze. Gojo lets out a faint whine, hand coming up to scrub at his nose as tears start dripping from his eyes.

“hH’GNt’choo-! ehH-! Ohfuck- hH’NGT-EINGT-nNGT-knDT’choo-! aINGT’choo-! hAH’DJZSHHEW-!”

“Christ, Satoru, bless you.”

“knngT-! aIghNT’choo-! hH’YEZSHH’aa-! AIYShh’oo-! neH’GEDT’choo-!”

Geto risks another look at Shoko, barely containing his smirk at the dumbfounded expression she’s wearing as Gojo frantically fans his face. ‘I haven’t even started talking about the tickle yet. He’s more allergic than I remembered. I almost feel bad…’ His thoughts are cut off by Gojo pressing his rapidly twitching nose into Geto’s shoulder, hitching against the fabric of his shirt. ‘And that’s why it’s only almost.’

“henGT’choo-! hH’DEHgnT’choo-!”

“You should stop that, you’re not-”

“heH’KNDTZSHH’uhh-! ihh’GNXXZT’choo-!”

“-gonna be able to catch a breath.”

“You- you’re right… Suguru it- it tihhhhckles… hEaHh-! AIYZSZHH’uu-! kuh’MMZSHH’aa-!”

Gojo’s voice is muffled from the congestion already seeping through the cracks, and Geto feels a pang of guilt tear at his heart. It’s quickly replaced by something calmer as Gojo aims the next fit at Geto’s chest, flower crown shaking lightly as he ducks his head, only releasing more pollen. ‘Sorry Satoru, but this is well deserved. Time for a little power of suggestion.’ 

“aH’GnZH’euu-! hehHh-! hH’MMZSHHH’oo-!” 

“Blessings. Those sound quite itchy-” 

“emmpffshh’oo-! hEPT’choo-! ehP’choo-!”

“-don’t they? Something bothering your sensitive-” 

“hHMPPT’choo-! AInGT’choo-! S- Suguru- hNGT’choo-! heH’KDZGT’choo-!”

“-nose? I bet it’s tickling something awful, isn’t it?” 

Meeting Gojo’s watery eyes, Geto lets himself slip right into stage three of his plan, time quickly running out. ‘Knowing him, he should be sensitive enough by now that just the word sneeze will set him off. Let’s try to get a handful more. I believe I’ll win anyways, but better safe than sorry.’

“eNGXXT’choo-!”

“Don’t you just-” 

“hepDT’choo-!”

“-have to…”

“hAhHh-!”

“Sneeze so badly?”

“hAH’ADJZSHH’uu-! keTSCHH’aa-! AIYZSHH’uhh-!”

“Blessings again for those sneezes.”

“I kn- know what…. Ohgod- hEH’EDZSHHEW-! guhhH’DNZSHH’oo-! I know what you’re doing.”

“Doing? I’m simply blessing you as you sneeze.”

“AIYZSHH’oo-! hH’GNkZSHH’uhh-!”

Taking pity on him as Shoko mouths ‘time’s up’, Geto pulls the crown from Gojo’s hair, tossing it to the side as the sneezy man ducks into his arm for another fit. ‘Whoops… maybe I should have removed it a bit sooner…’

“iNGt’choo-! heASHH’oo-! kEtCSHh-aizshh-kezZSHH’uu-!”

“Bless you Satoru…”

“You- hEHnGT’choo-! Sound quite gui- guilty- eh’knSHH’uhh-! Guilty, Suguru. Why ever could- hh’gEZSHH’aa-! Christ… Could that be? Wouldn’t have any-hNGSHH’iew-! Anything to do with my having two allergy attacks in the past four days, would it?” 

Geto’s eyes snap to the floor, a warm tint starting to spread across his cheeks, Shoko chuckling as she lightly pats Gojo’s back, letting her eyes close with a slight huff.

“I think he’s caught us, Geto.” 

“I believe so.” 

“hNNSCHh’iew-! Would someone care to explain to me what’s going on exactly?”

“Of course, but first we should probably get you some allergy medication. There was lavender in the flower crown.”

Gojo’s watery glare meets Geto, his mouth hanging open. ‘Probably less from shock and more for the sake of breathing. I doubt much is flowing through his sinuses right about now.’ Geto can’t help but smile at the sight, pink nose vibrating as Gojo attempts to end the attack by pinching it shut, tears streaming from his gorgeous eyes. ‘If he wasn’t so miserable, I’d want to see this side of him more often, he’s quite adorable like this.’

“I want to be mad bu- knDJZSSH’uu-! But I proooobably deserved this.”

Laughter erupts from the group, Shoko nearly falling over as it bursts from her chest, Geto pulling Gojo closer as they start walking back into the school, explaining the competition to a still sneezing Gojo.

Shoko leads them to her office where she keeps a stash of medications for situations like this. ‘Well, not exactly like this,’ Geto chuckles to himself, ‘I doubt there’s even been a situation quite like this one. Oh, that reminds me-’

“Say, Shoko, I did win, didn’t I? Even not counting-”

“hHNGTshh’aa-!”

“-the bonus ones?”

“Unfortunately, yes. It’s not like I stood a chance in the first place, you two obviously know more about each other.”

“Actually, I didn’t know he was allergic to that spray. That was all you.”

“Huh, really? Interesting. Oh- I guess you want to know the numbers?”

Geto flashes a smile, eyes wrinkling as Gojo whips around with another small fit aimed at the floor. He nods at Shoko, murmuring a blessing against Gojo’s hair as he convulses. 

“heh’gnZSHhh’oo-! eh’kshhh’iew-! heHh-! hAH’DTZShhh’uu-!”

“Again, not counting the extras, you rang in at forty-two. Exactly ten more than mine, surprisingly enough.”

“Oh Christ, that wasn’t counting the ones I- hH’gnZZShh’aa-! I’m still doing?”

A blush spreads across Gojo’s face, one of the strongest sorcerers in the Jujutsu world apparently not immune to embarrassment. Shoko offers a laugh in response, rummaging through her desk until she finds a blister pack, handing it over. Geto grabs a bottle of water from the fridge, passing it to Gojo with another blessing, lightly cupping his face for just a second.

“I saw that, ya know.” 

This time both men blush, Shoka rolling her eyes playfully, then throwing a box of tissues at Geto. Gojo hastily yanks out a handful, blowing his nose with a deep groan before sniffling into the pile.

“Clean him up, will ya? It’s been a long day, I’m headed home.”

“hH’AieZSHH’uu-!”

“Let’s play again some time, shall we, Shoko?”

“Yes, let’s. Next time I’ll beat you for sure.”

“hAH’ZASHH’oo-! How ‘bout next time it’s a free for all? I’d like a little chance for revenge.”

“This was the revenge, Satoru. Ours.”

“Oh fine, but you two owe me some chocolates! Oh- oh, and mochi!” 

Shoko smacks Gojo upside the head as Geto lets a laugh burst from his chest, the other two soon joining in harmony.

The world outside may be a dangerous place for a Jujutsu sorcerer, and the three of them aren’t immune to the stress, but right here, right now, they’re just three friends sharing a laugh.

Final Results: Forty-Two (42) sneezes from Geto’s Attempt. Method Use/Application: Lavender hidden in a flower crown already dripping with sakura pollen. Also used suggestibility, increasing success with sneezy talk.

[donniesexceptionalmind]

I’ve heard that having a vivid, picture filled way of thinking can be common in Autistic people.

However, I cannot see anything in my head. I believe this is called Aphantasia.

Sometimes it can become a bit difficult to relate to other autistic people because they talk about this colorful, imaginative, diverse way of thinking with pictures only. And I just don’t have that. However, I do have an inner dialogue that is practically all over the place. I often have trouble doing tasks, paying attention, sleeping and listening to people because of my inner dialogue and usual disinterest.

To make this a question, I ask if you have any information on the possible cross between vivid picture thinking and Autistic individuals. On top of that, what’s common for ADHD thinking? (I have my theories about having Audhd myself)

The first point I need to make: Autism is a spectrum. Yes, many autistic people report thinking in pictures, but that doesn't mean other ways aren't possible!

Media always portrays stereotypes & extremes. Cognitive thinking styles vary just as much between autistics as in allistics.

Visual imagination varies from person to person, allistic or autistic. While some people picture thoughts as images in their minds, there are people who do not or just very little. On one end, there are “aphantasics” who can’t visualise images at all or very little.

On the opposite end are “hyperphantasics” with hyperphantasia, who have an incredibly vivid imagination, so strong it’s almost like they’re really seeing it. In between, there are those with phantasia & hypophantasia, experiencing varying degrees of imagery vividness.

Temple Grandin was the first to talk about her vivid thinking in pictures ("Thinking in pictures", 1995). I do have to mention to take her writing with a grain of salt, I find her choice of wording very ableist & I disklike the term Asperger a lot because of reasons. When I read her work, I feel like she distinguishes between autism as a superpower (mostly highly intelligent people) & autism as a disaster (people with a normal/less than normal IQ/ nonverbal folk etcetera), which is related to a lot of ableism.

I certainly can do both: I mostly think in pictures, but I do have "talking" in my head. It's often called an inner narrator.

Many people with ADHD report having a vivid inner narrator that constantly talks & comments as well.

My inner narrator stops when my speaking declines, e.g., when I'm overstimulated or when I am having a bad day sensorywise - all I get is pictures then.

I think it's because words & speech are harder to produce & process than images.

My cognitive thinking style is associative, which means I sort information (as pictures) in categories - equal to a folder on a computer.

That's why I can "topic-jump" in a conversation, too. This also can be compared to ADHD people & their thought-jumping.

While not every autistic person is a visual learner, visual thinkers are common among the autistic population, just like you said.

That's because we tend to be more sensitive to details & patterns in our environments & therefore, more likely to notice subtle differences in shapes, colours or forms.

One of the most common misconceptions regarding visual thinking is that it is limited to just images.

Forms, shapes, lines, colors, scale, proximity - all these aspects are essential to take into account as they provide details about how data relates to other pieces of information, how significant something is in the scheme of things, how close two ideas are to one another & comprises both visual & cognitive dimensions that go way beyond pictures.

My associative thinking comes from my greatest strengths:

Strong affinity for details (bottom-up thinking)

Strong pattern recognition

The ability to come up with an array of different possibilities for a single situation due to my associative thinking

Almost as if it was the scene of a movie or a painted picture, I can see how information connects, allowing my brain to cut down several cognitive processes that would otherwise have to be involved if the information was delivered in a massive chunk of text or by auditory channels. Ah, yes, words are hard.

Spoken information can be tricky to process for us autistic people, particularly for those with more sensitive & avoidant sensory processing profiles, meaning our brains take in sensory information to a higher degree than those who aren’t.

This is why visualisation works so well as a tool- images are easier to process because you can detect patterns more easily than when you have to listen to someone giving verbal instructions (right?).

What other cognitive thinking styles are there?

Verbal/ logic thinkers

Music & math ('pattern') thinkers

Verbal/logic thinkers tend to be good at learning languages & have an affinity for words, literature & speech. They also tend to have a huge memory for verbal facts on all kinds of things. Some are exceptionally adept at learning many different foreign languages, but they tend to be poor at drawing & other visual thinking skills.

And pattern thinkers... have patterns.

Patterns E V E R Y W H E R E. ✨️

They tend to have problems with reading & writing composition.

✨️What about ADHD thinking style?✨️

Common is: out of the box. 😎

Three aspects of creative cognition are divergent thinking, conceptual expansion & overcoming knowledge constraints.

Divergent thinking, or the ability to think of many ideas from a single starting point, is a critical part of creative thinking.

Divergent thinking relates to low inhibition.

Latent inhibition is the ability to automatically 'filter out' irrelevant stimuli.

Divergent thinking & low inhibition are related because the ability to generate a variety of ideas is hampered by inhibitive processes that aim to suppress irrelevant ideas. You get distracted way to easily & you can lose yourself in many thoughts.

This can be very disabling, but it can also be beneficial for new ideas & problem-solving!

There is also an interesting essay I found:

ADHDers have a kinetic form of thinking.

Nick Walker coined this term. Great person /srs.

The “kinetic” in “Kinetic Cognitive Style” is about more than hyperactivity.

Read more here because I am now tired from my four hour research.

Sources: [♾️] [🌟] [🐿] [⚡️]

[daffodil-screaming]

these are such an interesting question, i lowkey wanna send u like 20 of them. anyway. 83, 56, 40

83. Who was your first kiss with?

I guess there are a few answers to this, but I’m going to go with what felt to me like my first real kiss. It was with my first girlfriend when I was 14/15. It was incredible. We had been dating for close to four months at that point and I was too much of a bottom coward to initiate anything. it’s so weird looking back life felt so huge and serious and having a perfect kiss and doing it right felt so important i just… never had the courage until one day I did. And god it was absolutely mind blowing. I remember clearly my lips were numb and tingly for a good ten minutes afterwards and my body felt like it was filled with fireworks. She said it was “fine” lol. We broke up about a week later and she did some horrible stuff that I won’t get into now, but yeah. It was a good first kiss, even if I didn’t kiss anyone for four years after that.

56. State 8 facts about your body

Oh god umm okay-

-I have really tiny baby wrists compared to the rest of me 😭 why are they so fragile? I have no idea. It’s made for some play tho and my flawless flirting move “hey I bet you can’t fit both of my wrists in your hands” and then they do and I desire them carnally

- one of my legs is half an inch longer than the other

-much to my wife’s delight, you can slap my thigh and it will make my boobs jiggle and vice versa, I have “S tier jiggle physics” as she would say

-since I started birth control my nipples have got sooooo sensitive I really think I could cum just from having them sucked on

-I can fit an 8inch dildo in my ass comfortably but sometimes my cunt is so tight I struggle to fit a finger

-sometimes my joints randomly dislocate

-my hair wants to be naturally curly sooooo bad but I cannot seem to tame it. I cannot make it behave so I normally wear it in plaits

- my eyesight is so bad the optician once gave me a leaflet he normally gives to over 60s

THATS 8 not so sexy facts about my body

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?

Oh god this is so embarrassing but yes, I write a lot of poetry and occasionally songs. I’ve never written a song for someone but I’ve written many poems a lot of which are inspired by people, only a couple of them have ever had a poem written specifically for them tho 😅 letting someone read my poetry is like a blood bond to me lol

[perfectharmonyloveschaos]

I stumbled upon this video of the Filoni & Favreau interview that came out for The Mandalorian Season 3 [here is the link to the interview] that people have tried to reference towards 'supporting' the idea of Sabine being force sensitive and it made me realise something. Neither of them actually say anything about her being force-sensitive. They never mention it. Take note to what they both say exactly:

Favreau: "That's not necessarily true. Yeah, it doesn't happen that often. Although I would argue that Sabine is maybe a little bit of both." Filoni: "I dunno if I'd call her a Jedi though. The interesting question is how you define when someone is a Jedi."

Now, what does this snippet actually tell us? Favreau himself sees Sabine as being a little bit both Mandalorian and Jedi, assumingly due to her being trained by both Mandalorians and Jedi. While Filoni argues that and questions if she'd qualify to be considered a Jedi. He explicitly brings up deliberately, the concept of questioning what makes someone a Jedi. How do you define what being a Jedi means? Now, most people tend to see it as being someone who was trained by a Jedi in the way of the Jedi order, wields a lightsaber, and uses the force. But Filoni, without needing to, tries to make people question that.

And I think this will definitely play into Ahsoka and how Sabine has been portrayed.

I don't think Sabine is force-sensitive.

She was never hinted at or shown to possess any force abilities within the show (sensing people/knowing things before they happen, super-human reflexes) and she spent years around two Jedi both of whom were able to sense other force sensitives easily enough. People try to say that Kanan claiming she's too "Mandalorian" during the Trials of the Darksaber was hinting at Sabine locking herself out of the force as in that she was force-sensitive but somehow blocking herself from those abilities subconsciously, however, that makes no sense since the context of the scene is based totally on her, like Din Djarin during the Book of Boba Fett, being unable to properly wield the Darksaber due to her emotions and hesitancy. Her fears and guilt was stopping the force that exists all around her from naturally flowing through her and into the darksaber, hindering her from wielding it properly. How could she block herself from the force to the point where she shows no signs of it, and yet Kanan notices it and does nothing about it before the Darksaber incident? Do people really think Kanan wouldn't have sensed and tried to train Sabine earlier? That Ezra wouldn't have brought up her force sensitivity after this? And even if he was referring to her being locked out of the force, what about after Trials of the Darksaber when she comes to grips with her guilt, or even after Heroes of Mandalore when she makes amends with her family and past? Why wouldn't she show any force sensitivity after that when she assumingly is now free from her "Mandalorian" ties that blocked her force sensitivity? Because it was never about her being force-sensitive, it was about her wielding the Darksaber.

They could have hinted at Sabine being force-sensitive multiple times throughout the show but never did. No other force-users ever take notice of her. She cannot sense the Kyber crystal in Season 4, but Ezra does sense it much like Kanan sensed the other kyber crystal back in Season 1. She never shows any heightened abilities, senses or reflexes compared to even early Season 1 Ezra who himself was blocked off from the force and struggled to connect or train due to his trauma, and yet still showed signs of his force-sensitivity. We even had Kanan who blocked himself off from the force and yet was still able to be sensed by an untrained Ezra during the pilot. The idea that Kanan, Ezra, or even Ahsoka during the short time she spent with the Ghost Crew, never noticed Sabine's force sensitivity but somehow Ahsoka does post-Rebels is quite frankly ridiculous and somewhat insulting to the bond she had with Kanan and Ezra.

So, what does this have to do with the question Filoni referenced in his interview?

I think it is a hint towards a major point being addressed in Ahsoka: how do you define what makes someone a Jedi?

Our three major Jedi-orientated characters (Ahsoka, Sabine, and Ezra) all portray the different ways someone can be a Jedi without fitting the traditional standard of Jedi. Ahsoka has the force, left the Jedi Order, claims she isn't a Jedi anymore despite following their teachings and wields a lightsaber. Ezra has the force, was taught by Kanan who never finished his training, doesn't follow the entire Jedi code due to his dabblings with the dark side and allowing a level of attachment to his crew and homeworld but still considers himself a Jedi. And Sabine is someone who is learning the Jedi teachings, was taught by a Jedi to wield a lightsaber but doesn't have the force.

They can all be considered Jedi.

Even Sabine, who doesn't have the force.

Because the force doesn't make you a Jedi.

What people don't mention is that in that same interview, Filoni actually says what he believes defines a Jedi. He says:

"The Jedi is a way of training. It's a way of philosophy and being."

Notice that Filoni never mentions the force or being force-sensitive. Another interesting thing to note is that he brings up Jedi being a "way of training" first and foremost, something that is extremely relevant now with all the information we have gotten about Ahsoka training Sabine. Each of these criteria that Filoni mentions is relevant to Sabine, all without making her suddenly force-sensitive. This seems intentional given that Ahsoka had already finished filming by the time this interview was published.

This is the point Filoni is actually trying to get across while misdirecting people in the trailer. After all, why put so much emphasis on Sabine in all the trailers and especially draw attention to her wielding the lightsaber, while also having Shin state "You have no power"? Shin doesn't consider Sabine a Jedi because she isn't force-sensitive.

Filoni would never give something so important away in the trailers. Look at how secretive they've been about basically everything concerning Ahsoka up until this point. His desire to keep things secret has been referenced by Rosario Dawson herself and many of the cast are very careful in interviews to avoid giving anything away. Filoni would never have given such a big twist away so obviously. Plus, if this was some major tease about Sabine being force-sensitive, then Filoni would've had the question taken out of the interview. Nothing in the trailer actually shows Sabine having the force, but that doesn't mean Ahsoka can't teach her to be a Jedi without it.

I do not think that Sabine isn't force-sensitive, but rather that it's a huge misdirect to hide the overarching concept that is going to be challenged through Ahsoka—what defines a Jedi?

[kaelsleftverdantsphere]

Emotional damage

What if Illidan found out about Kael's plans before he left for the Tempest Keep

---

"You have no idea what you're dealing with, Kael'thas..." The demon hunter said, watching his companion.

"I know exactly what I'm dealing with..." Kael smiled and looked away. "I've known you for a while now, Illidan."

"You think so? The time you've known me for means nothing-"

"-compared to the time you spent in that one filthy room... I know all of your sob stories by now. I know all of you..." He touched the demon hunter's chest. "And I will use that knowledge to my advantage."

"I wonder, Kael'thas... how we would be under different circumstances..." He buried one of his clawed hands in the prince's long hair and pulled it, which was followed by a whine from the smaller elf. "If I didn't find out about your little plans... If you didn't have them in the first place. I always thought you were a smart one, Sunstrider..."

Kael'thas laughed and traced his nails over the tattoos on Illidan's chest. "Are you the one who should judge me, darling, truly?" He giggled. "I am not the one they call the betrayer after all, am I..."

"You might as well be..." Illidan growled, pulling Kael's hair, hard. "I trusted you..."

"Ow, Belore, Illidan... Stop, you're making me blush-"

"You're impossible!" Illidan let go of his hair and just looked over Kael's room, thinking of what his next course of action should be. "I can't believe that you would... you would side with an enemy-"

"Of course I would! You aren't delivering on your promises and I had to make a choice! I won't let my people suffer just so that I can stay with you, you cannot possibly expect that from me..."

"I am trying, Kael'thas! I am doing everything in my power to defeat the legion and all you do is whine and SIDE WITH THE ENEMY?"

"But defeating the legion is not what I asked you for, Illidan... I provided you people, power and help to achieve your goals if you help me... And you didn't uphold your side of the bargain."

"You are nothing but a selfish little brat, I shouldn't have ever agreed to working with you..."

Kael smirked. "And what if I am? You still fell madly for me, Illidan..." He said, with that soft little voice he usually used to lull the other to sleep. With not a hint of venom or a bite, yet still piercing.

"You are a stupid child, Kael'thas... I can't believe I could've ever felt anything but distaste towards you." Illidan's own voice was strong and he himself was determined to not let the other elf get inside his head. "I should have known what kind of a person you are just based on Dath'remar being your ancestor..."

"Oh so now you're going to talk about my family? Do you want me to remind you about yours?" The bite was back in full force and Illidan could tell that he did touch a sensitive spot within the prince.

"Mine? There's nothing you could possibly dig up that could hurt me... I had years to mourn and years to accept... You did not have that luxury, have you, Kael? Tell me..." Illidan smiled and grabbed the blood elf by the chin, holding it up as to see into his eyes perfectly. "Do you miss your father?"

Kael stood there, unmoving for a moment, but his eyes couldn't lie.

"You miss him, don't you?" Illidan lightly stroke his cheek with his other hand. "He could have been here, do you know that? If you only weren't so selfish and actually were there with him..."

"Shut your foul mouth!" Kael took a step back, tripping and falling onto his couch. "You have no idea how all of that went down!"

"Oh but I know, little strider... I know... And do you know who told me?" Illidan took a few steps to the couch, placed his hands on Kael's shoulders and lowered his face to his. "You did..." He whispered. "You argued about how you know me but oh no, prince... I know you-"

"You don't know shit, demon!" He could feel his insides boiling when he attempted to slap Illidan, but the other's hand was noticibly faster.

"Oh... Do you wish for this to get physical? Do you really want your life to end that quickly, love?" He was holding the other's wrist. "I will crush every single one of the bones in your pretty body if you continue acting like a pest-"

"And I will kill you, Stormrage..." He reached his other hand up to Illidan's head and grabbed one of his horns, pulling it. "I will be the end of you..."

"What?" The demon hunter couldn't help but laugh. "Like you killed your own mother-?"

Kael's mouth opened, he was positively shocked. "H- How dare you say that!"

"How dare me? How dare you think you would be even remotely able to hurt me..." He straightened his back, pulling Kael up from the couch. "See... I won't kill you-"

"Because you are a coward!" The prince spat.

"A coward? No... I won't kill you, because making you watch the lives, of those you care so deeply about, shatter... That will be much better for the both of us..."

"What... What are you talking about?"

"I'll make you watch as your troops die on the battlefield... Slow, desperate and powerless without your much needed mana..." The demon hunter laughed. "As you will be shaking and begging for me to kill you..."

"You cannot do that!" Kael lost his grip on the horn and instead used that hand to try to set his wrist free. "You can't just imprison a prince, if you don't know that-"

"And just who is going to fight me to set you free?" He tightened his grip. "Noone will come looking for you... Noone will care, when I tell them you've betrayed them..."

Kael'thas' eyes widened. "You... Illidan... You- you wouldn't do that... Not to me-"

"Oh? You think I wouldn't? Just how I thought you wouldn't betray me?"

"I didn't mean to!" He cried. "Illidan I didn't- I might have- I might have fucked up, okay- but-"

"Oh... Lying to save your ass? Your father would not be proud of you doing that, would he?"

"He wouldn't be proud of a lot of things I had to do..." Kael stopped struggling against Illidan. "He would be disgusted if he saw that I joined forces with you... And he would be even more disgusted if he knew I fell in love with you..."

"You didn't, Kael'thas... You don't hurt people you love..."

"Then how come you got to hurt Tyrande?"

"I never hurt her-"

"Why do they call you the betrayer then? You betrayed the ones you love yet you still argue your actions were justified-"

"You know nothing-" Illidan shook his head and let go of the prince's wrist.

"I actually know a lot, darling..." He said, rubbing his wrist. "How come you get to hurt me but when I hurt you, it's not the same..."

"Because you are the one who-"

"-who betrayed you? I BARELY EVEN DID ANYTHING YET!"

"But you were planning to! I cannot forgive you for that! It's still treason!"

"I had my reasons just as much as you had yours all those years ago... You should be the one who understands me, not the one who threatens to ruin everything I fought for up until this point-"

"You want my understanding? After everything I've done for you, after everything I gave you- you still want more?"

"I just... I only want my people to know peace again..." Kael's voice broke slightly at the end of sentence. "I want to know peace again, Illidan... And I didn't see any other solution..."

"I was your solution, Kael'thas... I just couldn't only work in your best interest... Sometimes you have to put some things on hold..."

"But we don't have the time to be put on hold, Illidan... I am unwell and the more I fight in your name the worse I get- all of this is killing me and you don't want to help me... Yet you want to tell me I am the one betraying you? You're so incredibly dense-"

"I am trying, Kael'thas!"

"That's what I'm doing as well! Listen to me!"

"There was never a moment when I wouldn't be listening to you, love..."

"I know of so many moments like those, but of course, you are never the one to blame for anything..."

"That is untrue... I know of my wrongdoings and I am trying to correct them... Unlike you."

"Yes, Illidan... Because the only thing I am doing is surviving-"

[kallowrites]

hello, this is just some raw dialogue (as in, this is how I draft fics - no 'character tags' or much description in-between) for an idea I've thought about ever since I met Vengarl in-game -- I just wanna take him with me to go see how pretty parts of Drangleic are and let him talk a bunch more jhgdj

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Did you ever have family, Vengarl? Forgive me if that’s a sensitive subject - I’m only curious. I can’t imagine the life of a sellsword is very… settled.”

“None that I can recall, no.”

“None at all? Did you not keep… company?”

“You ask dangerous questions, my friend. Ah- Do not look so distressed. I don’t mind much. Thinking back on it… In those days, I likely did. Though it’d be temporary at best. An… exchange, more than anything. With Forossa gone and divided, travelling as I did, doing what I did… I had no desire for such trivial things. I had no friends. No family. My fellow mercenaries did not even dare to bother me for any such thing, unless it was to announce a departure for more killing. The only persistent company was my blade, and my lust for violence.”

“That sounds… rather lonely.”

“I do not feel the same towards it. I think it was only fitting that others kept their distance as they did. Perhaps I was too frightening for most – I do not recall anyone daring to ask for more than a night’s companionship. And even then… I don’t recall it ending well.”

“...I’ve never done anything like that before. Perhaps I’m too much of a romantic, in that regard.”

(chuckles) “The body has its urges, whether you’re a dreamer, a loner, or any mix of all else between the two. You do what you must, at times. Though I suppose… it depends on the person in question.”

“Then how do you- Oh, forgive me,” (she blushes) “I’m growing far too comfortable, I shouldn’t be so rude…”

“Saying such things only piques curiosity. You may speak freely with me as you please. I will let you know if you offend - I will not hold it against you.”

“...It’s just… About urges. You’ve certainly been undead for far longer than I have, yes? I cannot imagine that… bodes well for them. Or you.”

“Ah, well… I cannot fault such a query. It’s not an issue for me, anymore. Though I could feel my body’s presence and existence prior to you killing it, it was… a distant connection. Perhaps more comparable to an instinct - a hunch, more than a feeling. If it still had urges from when it was human - from when I was human… I never realized it. All I could feel emanating from it was hate and violence. Being so disconnected from it for so long only served to make that obvious to me. Its only desire was to destroy and ruin all it came across, in its blind, mad journey.”

“...I cannot imagine what that’s like.”

“Do not trouble yourself with attempting to understand it. I doubt I would have understood it myself, had it not been my fate.”

“...”

“...What about you, wanderer?”

“Hm?”

“Family. Friends. Companions. Or are you, perhaps, as lonely on your journey as I have been on mine?”

(she shakes her head, looking thoughtful if a bit sad) “No. I don’t have a family, I think. I didn’t really have much in the way of friends either until coming to Drangleic, in truth. I always liked to wander, but… When the curse found its way to me, my wandering suddenly had direction. Before, I just wanted to explore the world. Now… I suppose I have a goal in mind. Though perhaps not one of my own choosing.”

“You did not choose this path you’ve set out on?”

“Not exactly. According to the Herald in Majula, many have walked the same path as I am. Some go further than others. Some don’t go that far at all before losing hope. All I know is that I arrived in Drangleic, and have been… nudged, I suppose… in one direction. ‘Seek souls. Larger, more powerful souls. Seek the King, lest this land swallow you whole, as it has so many others.’ That is my sole guidance. Though… That’s not to say I have not still retained my old ways. I still find great joy in wandering… Enjoying the journey itself. Anticipating the destination, but not rushing towards it.” “I believe that is a very reasonable way to live. Taking time to appreciate the journey for what it is, I mean. I know in the days where I still lived - not branded as Undead - I didn’t do such a thing. I didn't care. It didn’t matter where I went or who I fought for or against… All that mattered was the destination: Spilling the blood of all those who were not the ones who hired me. I may have seen a great many things… travelled to many places… But I cannot remember it all. I didn’t pay attention to it. I didn’t need to, I didn’t have to unless it could prove a useful thing to know in a battle. And even then… I was reckless. Too confident in my strength, despite that confidence not being misplaced. A disadvantage in battle only meant more death and destruction before it was through. Perhaps… That is how I was severed apart like this in the first place.”

[number1villainstan]

AtLA Analysis Rewatch: S1E7: Winter Solstice Part 1, The Spirit World

Intro: Man, it's been a while since my last one! I have no idea whether I'll be able to do it all in one day, or start the day I'm starting this draft, but I think I should start anyways, just to make some progress. If I'm not mistaken, this is the episode with Hei Bei and the burnt forest around the village. But: let's get into it!

Let's skip the intro for now, because I procrastinated and don't think I have time. (This is two days after I wrote the intro, rip me.)

The Previously section: two focuses, on Aang being the Avatar and on Katara's necklace being lost. I don't think it's a coincidence that a lot of scenes used for the Avatar emphasis have a spiritual connotation; the statues in the Air Temple, the Fire Sages in their temple, Bumi talking about the duty of the Avatar.

It's interesting how "The Avatar must restore balance by defeating Fire Lord Ozai" is really blatantly stated. It makes sense--the series needs a direction to go, an overarching goal/plotline--but the directness of it, compared to the subtlety with which a lot of other aspects of being the Avatar and the setting and characters in general is approached, is a little odd. Or maybe that's just me having spend so long vibing with my fellow Ozai/villain fans and not watching the show in way too long.

What trees are those shown in the beginning of the episode? Obviously deciduous, with round and very thick canopies. Also, the hawks is bright red; is it the same species as the Fire Nation messenger hawks? It's almost certainly male, though.

Aang just jumps straight into the clouds--impulsiveness--but brings his staff--enough wisdom/foresight to not die. Thank god. Also, the 'turns out clouds are made of water' line--am I wrong? Is this the fortune-teller village episode? (Also, would you really get that soaked from jumping into a cloud? It's basically just fog but higher up, right?)

Okay, so it is the burned-forest episode, as I thought. Also, the forests themselves look very thick (and very green), which makes me surprised that the forest fire didn't reach a lot farther; thick forests like that are generally conducive to really strong wildfires, along with a high percentage of young trees that haven't built up bark to survive and--guess what?--suppression of smaller natural fires, which makes easily-burnable debris build up. I'm not going to go into a lot of detail here but forest fires are an important part of a forest's life cycle, and it looks like the forest here has seen a lot of fire suppression. Which is probably why the 'scarred' part of the forest looks so bad, with no trees that survived or anything. Although ash is full of nutrients, generally, so why haven't faster-growing smaller plants moved in yet?

But enough about the forest fire, I guess. Even if it's not accurately portrayed at all.

There is an interesting character/philosophical moment that goes on here. Aang feels responsible for this forest burning down ("how could I let this happen?") and while Katara feels otherwise ("You didn't let this happen") Aang doesn't listen to her, saying that it's his job as the Avatar and that he doesn't know how to do his job. Which is odd, because he's 12, he shouldn't have this responsibility--it's canon that the Avatar should only know they're the Avatar at 16--and because the burnt area is a tiny, tiny fraction of the world. It's a symptom, not the systems the Avatar is supposed to work on the level of.

When Sokka asks about how Aang is supposed to talk to Roku, you can hear the compassion in his voice--he's trying to be sensitive, obviously, but it's also in his nature to be practical and well-grounded.

We see Iroh again, but his antics in the hot springs make it clear that his character hasn't yet switched from the comic relief old man of the early episodes to the wise mentor figure he is in later seasons. Also, Zuko's insistence that his troubles "cannot be soaked away"-- is he refusing to rest or relax, no matter how tired or burnt out he gets? That sort of tunnel vision is not going to help him. At all.

Iroh also calls himself Zuko's 'teacher,' rather than Uncle. Not sure what that's supposed to say.

"Are you ready to be cheered up?" Katara doesn't jump straight into trying to make Aang happy; she knows the importance of grieving and letting yourself feel sad.

What was the old man doing wandering out there? What's his job? Why was he alone? He was probably looking for the flying bison, but again, why is he alone? Are there others searching for it? (Also, why aren't his clothes all ashy?)

The destruction Hei Bei caused, shown in the village--what stage of rebuilding are they in? Most of the buildings are fine, but one part of one of them is just a frame that's all broken--how the hell did it get like that??? Also, are those roof tiles the only thing the roof is made of? That doesn't seem like wise building sense, unless it's a cultural thing that I'm missing.

"It is the greatest honor to be in your presence!" Aang didn't even bat an eye at that. Maybe he's getting used to being the Avatar, or grateful that he has something he can do as the Avatar after running into the burnt forest and blaming himself.

How many people are in the hall? It doesn't look like a whole lot. I'm not going to do the counting like I did with the SWT. Are there any other families or people in other buildings? What are the people doing there in the hall? Is this an agricultural town? What is its source of income? Does it trade? How did they build those buildings and what are they for? I know I'm not gonna get answers but STILL

Oooh, Hei Bai, not Hei Bei. My bad.

Why doesn't Katara know about the Winter Solstice bringing the Spirit World closer? Does it not interact with the human world unless there are enough humans gathered? Perhaps it's a symptom of the cultural destruction of the SWT. (Or perhaps it's prompting exposition for the audience, which, fair.)

Katara again displays an ability to pick up on other's emotions, and Aang brings up his inexperience ("I don't know anything") at being the Avatar. But Aang tries anyways, because someone is in need and he is in a position to help even if he doesn't have the expertise.

Iroh doesn't seem all too concerned about missing Zuko's deadline, probably familiar with a teenager's empty threats. His interactions with the meadow mole give us the first (I think) glimpse into his later characterizations of 'wise mentor.' In fact, with the EK soldiers trying to take him prisoner (and calling him the once-great General Iroh) this episode also is the first time in which the series starts to take him seriously.

Should have written this earlier, but why is Hei Bai choosing to abduct villagers? And why only one at a time? (The probably explanation is to keep it kid-friendly, but what about in-universe?)

I find it funny how much grandstanding Aang did right before Hei Bai showed up, and also how oblivious he was to the massive spirit walking right behind him. Did the spirit's footsteps make sound? Did Aang just not hear him? (Also, why wasn't he more afraid?)

Aang trying to reason with something that is clearly acting like a wild animal (and therefore probably can't be reasoned with)--what is Aang's experience with spirits? Has he had any direct experience? What were the stories and lore surrounding spirits in the Air Temples?

Sokka holds back on going out to help until Aang gets hurt, and then he immediately runs out to try and fight Hei Bai. Loyalty and practicality.

Of course, Zuko's threat to leave without his uncle was empty, and Zuko went looking for him. I wonder how long it took for Zuko to suspect something was up. Not to mention that Zuko knew by looking at the rock formations that it was earthbending, even though his soldiers thought it was a landslide. (Unlikely, methinks.) Perhaps the person who brought up the idea of Zuko's crew being much newer than 3 years, and them being traded out as punishment/disgrace on the regular, was right. If so, that soldier would be a lot less experienced with earthbending than Zuko.

The EK soldiers use ostrich-horses while the FN soldiers use komodo-rhinos. Cultural differences in values (speed vs intimidation/fight capability) or differences in resources (which species is native to where)? Also, what is the armor they're using for their ostrich horses? How do they get the metal? (god i have so many worldbuilding questions--)

This is the first time that someone's mentioned what Iroh has done as a FN General: the Siege of Ba Sing Se. 600 days is a long time, almost 2 years, and it likely would have wreaked havoc on their food/water supply, especially if Iroh was smart and cut off outside sources. And Ba Sing Se is a big city, which means that hundreds, probably thousands, of people died during that siege, from hunger, thirst, or unrest. Unfortunately, while the Siege of BSS is a Thing Iroh Did, it's never really properly in the series; as much as I love the Dai Li as antagonists ("There is no war in Ba Sing Se" and "The Earth King has invited you to Lake Laogai" will absolutely give you chills if you know the context) that suppression of knowledge and talk of the war prevents the show from grappling with the long-lasting effects of that siege. Of course, most of the death toll was likely in the lower ring, among the lower classes, and we all know the lower classes don't matter! And if the lower ring's population depletes then BSS can just take in a bunch of refugees to replenish it and keep up a big workforce, right? God, the entire situation is fucked.

But. Back to the actual episode.

Iroh doesn't even mention Lu Ten dying. Smart, who knows what these EK soldiers know? Leaving the shoe on the ground after falling off the ostrich-horse, also smart.

So we have confirmation that spirits (or at least, spirit-touched humans) can walk in the human world undetected. (I doubt that Aang's statement of "I'm in the spirit world!" is fully accurate.)

Iroh canonically has stinky feet. June will show up later in the series, but I still find that funny. (Also, what if it's genetic?)

So, Roku's dragon appears, but without Roku. You might argue that it's because Roku is inside Aang, as his past life, but later Roku shows up outside Aang to talk to him in the Spirit World proper, so that theory, while still possible, doesn't have a lot of evidence for it.

Those spines on the dragon's back don't look so comfy to sit on. Do they stop near the neck?

So, Iroh can see spirits that other humans can't. This episode references/teases his past a lot, apparently, even if first-time viewers don't know his past.

Okay, why can the dragon and Aang go through walls/ceilings when it's convenient and then walk around like normal?

Given the significance of dates such as the winter solstice, the solar eclipse, it's no wonder that astronomy is so important in the worldbuilding of the spiritual side of AtLA. What I want to know is, what are the least spiritual days of the year? The solstices are both very spiritual, but what about the equinoxes? Eclipses clearly block spiritual power here (at least in the minds of the benders) but what about other celestial phenomena?

I also want to know how shrines and statues like the one in the forest interact with the spirits they're supposed to represent. Are they shows of respect from humans to spirits? Do they increase spirits' power? Do they 'anchor' a spirit to a particular place? What spirits like them? What about the shrines do they like?

That's some serious physical strength from Zuko, pushing aside a massive rock (that's being earthbent) and shattering a chain with his heel. What else can he do? In addition, where and when did Iroh learn to fight like that with chains?

Sokka's practicality again: "I need to use the bathroom," "You could give us supplies/money." Utterly shameless, too.

Where is Crescent Island on the map? Where is Hei Bai's village on the map? What's the distance between them? How far are they making Appa fly?

And that's the final credits! I ended up having to space this out over two days, so perhaps I wasn't as 'in the groove' as I hoped, but hey. Another episode that I managed to get out.

[untamedson]

This is a private blog for Kayce Dutton, from the show Yellowstone. Thank you for taking the time to read my rules, and while I’m pretty open about things usually, there are a few rules that I have. If you have any questions, do not be afraid to send an ask for clarification! This blog is rated 20+, do not follow if you are below the age of 20.

written by: Maya, she/her/hers pronouns, 25+, discord is available upon request for mutuals only

Some roleplay guidelines:

Due to the mature nature of the tv series, this blog is rated 20+.

If you’re sensitive to violence, blood, language, and killing of any sort I advise you to read my threads with caution because I cannot promise that everything will be sunshine and roses all the time. If any of my threads have an alarming amount of triggering material I will appropriately tag it and put it under a read more.

I will tag any and all triggers.

I will tag anything that may be of a triggering nature such as blood, gore, death, etc. If there is something I miss that you really need me to tag, please tell me! Anonymously or not, I won’t ask why and don’t need any explanation, just tell me what you need tagged and consider it done. Posts that are triggering will have a ‘tw:’ before them, so for example if someone’s trigger was blood, it’d be ‘tw: blood’ (without the quotations).

Do not rush me into replying or writing a starter.

I write at my own pace at my own time. I am a very slow writer, and also have a life outside of tumblr. If I do not reply to your thread right away it doesn’t mean that I hate you, or that I am bored with our thread. I’m either busy, don’t have the motivation to write, or don’t feel the muse for it at the moment. Along that same token, don’t rush me into plotting or writing starters. I’m a slow writer, and even slower when I write a starter.

I’m open to all roleplaying styles!

I am open to chat threads, short threads, long threads, just note that long threads will take longer for me to reply to as it is much faster and easier for me to write plain dialogue than prose. If you have a preferred length you are welcome to message me, and we can work something out! Just don’t feel the need to have to match my length exactly, all I ask is that it’s comparable in length, like if I give you a good solid two paragraphs, I expect more than just a sentence back.

Don’t automatically assume that because something is Fanon, I consider it canon.

This covers everything from popular fan theories regarding my character’s backstory, to popular ships. Don’t assume that just because something is the popular sentiment, that I’m just going to regard it as canon on my blog. If you have questions about my portrayal that aren’t on my blog, and need me to clarify something, please!! Send me asks!! Send me messages!! I love talking about my character and would be more than happy to explain things to you.

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Now that all that shippy stuff is taken care of, I am always 100% down to roleplay friendships, partnerships, frenemies relationships, etc. Just hit me up with ideas, I love plotting things out and getting a dialogue going about what’s to come.

A note on duplicates.

Honestly? Duplicates don’t bug me at all, I know some people can be sensitive to duplicates, and that following/seeing duplicates around gives them anxiety and that’s perfectly fair, I completely understand. Personally however, I don’t mind following//being followed by duplicates of the same character. Everybody has their own unique flavor to add to their character regardless of the source material. If you’re a duplicate and unsure of whether or not you can follow me, consider this an invitation to come and say hi so we can gush about our character together.

[unsettledink]

An interesting thread on comments and comment culture passed by on my dash, and for some reason it hooked me in. As usual, I started off wanting to say one thing and next thing I know, I'm 4k in with thoughts that everyone wants to hear. Right?

I left most of it on the post, talking about how comments used to be conversations, and how it never feels like people address the vulnerability of leaving a comment when they try and encourage more feedback.

I don't have answers. It's a cultural shift and how do things end up shifting again? Something big like a new platform or a radical change will probably have to appear before things go in a different direction, whatever it may be.

So no, I don't have an answer. I can say what helps me out, personally, when trying to remember why I want to go through the work of leaving a comment:

I write. I know from the other side what comments feel like. I remind myself of the excitement of seeing a notification pop up. (Obviously if you don't write, this doesn't help that much lol.)

Whatever I fear them judging me for, I can almost guarantee someone else has already judged me for something much worse. I mean, come on. I know the sort of things I write or rec.

I've done it enough I have a template in my head of how to write a comment. There are a few resources for that floating around that are good for getting started. Practice makes perfect.

Applying techniques from therapy. I'm not great at it, or have really internalized it, but at least aware that my fears are being egged on by anxiety, by past bad experiences, by the special hell of rejection sensitive dysphoria.

Easier said than done, especially on certain days, but just... running out of fucks to give. Like, oh my god self, so what if some author thinks I was too enthusiastic about their fic? What does it matter? They're just another random person on the internet, what are they going to do? Laugh at me? Then they're the one being a jackass, AND they don't get any more comments. Whatever.

And on that last one, if it's feeling impossible, like it'll never happen... holy shit this is going to sound condescending, but give it some time. Me from 10 years ago would have laughed at the idea of not caring what someone else thought. At some point, without me really noticing, I just could not care what some rando on the internet thought. It wasn't an active 'no I'm not going to care', it was 'wow I cannot find the energy to give a shit about you'. (But I can still find it to be mad when someone is Wrong on the Internet, so.)

I bring that up because every time I find out someone's age lately, I'm like, Jesus Christ. I forget how young fandom - esp tumblr - skews. Cause of course, I'm still young! It's not like I'm old, it's just that everyone is... younger... than... me. Wait. But for real, being in your late teens SUCKS. (Maybe you're lucky and they don't, but I doubt.) Being in your early 20's somehow sucks even more??? Being in your 20's period sucks. You couldn't pay me to be 20-anything again.

(Thinking of all the fandom people on here 20, 30 years older than me being like lol, you're still so freaking young :D )

Every comment I get these days I hoard like a dragon, and anytime I'm feeling crappy about writing or about some new thing being a bomb, I pull those suckers out and reread them for ages. I've got a whole doc just of tumblr comments, cause there's no other good way to find them again. if I'm really desperate, I go poke to see if there's any new bookmarks on my fic, in case they dropped a tag or put in a collection of favs or left a note of some sort (ya'll know authors can see those right?).

And I'd say I'm a pretty confident writer. I know I write a lot of niche stuff in tiny fandoms, so comparatively, I probably get a lot of comments. I have a moderately high opinion of my writing skills, so I'm mostly not sitting there going 'oh god I'm the worst writer ever', whereas I know that's the case for a LOT of fic writers. I'm mostly just sitting there like 'why didn't it hit the spot? why won't anyone say anything? I am so desperate to talk shop please anyone give me an excuse!!'.

So just... yeah. Throw an emoji at me. Throw a gif at me. Throw a novel that takes six comment boxes at me. Throw the exact same comment at fifteen different chapters/fics. I love it all.

(And hey. If you just lurk and read, it's okay. I get it. I still love you too.)