#I cannot believe it!! it’s finally time!!

[spirallingout]

School (negatively), working in a hospital, being forced to pray in school for over half my life.

Nobody wants that, believe me.

Wolfwalkers, Into the Spider-Verse and Puss in Boots: The Last Wish.

As the DM, I like to joke about my player's characters exploding when they displease me.

I genuinely cannot remember at this point.

No matter how milquetoast an opinion, there will always be at least one person who acts like you've broken the Geneva Conventions.

Going outside. I have agoraphobia.

Nope.

A dog bit me on the face when I was 2 and I only learnt about it a decade later.

Yes. Extremely.

Being around someone or someones who make you happy, safe and loved.

You're allowed to make mistakes. You aren't a bad person.

Working. Mostly.

Maybe try Youtubing?

Being safe.

I'm trans so there's a few things...

My friends, cats, talking about things I find interesting.

See, I'd love to believe in stuff like that but every time I try to dip my toes in these interests, I get bombarded by obvious grifters and the gullible.

I don't have one.

It's quieter and it's nice and dark. I have issues with bright lights.

Again, I kinda wish I could be but am completely put off by the sheer quantity of grifters who exploit things like this.

They're so much better than they think they are, talking to them is so much fun and the world would be a lesser place without them.

I'll never forgive them for what they did. They're a cruel person and they're lucky I didn't press charges.

Cutting off a bad friend. It hurt like hell and I wish things could have been different but it had to be done.

Autumn. It means summer's finally over.

Purple. I've always loved those darker colours.

MJ.

Books.

Cry mostly.

Seeing others happy. If I can make them smile or laugh myself, all the better.

Messy. As hell.

Jesus Christ so fucking many.

I try to write.

Unpleasant textures.

No.

It's somehow both?

I cheated on my french exam.

The Garden by The Crane Wives.

Maxor. His incorrect video game summaries are some of the funniest shit I have ever seen.

Nail biting. My parents tried to stop me. They did not succeed.

questions I think would be fun to be asked

what are 3 things you’d say shaped you into who you are?

show us a picture of your handwriting?

3 films you could watch for the rest of your life and not get bored of?

what’s an inside joke you have with your family or friends?

what made you start your blog?

what’s the best and worst part of being online/a creator?

what scares you the most and why?

any reacquiring dreams?

tell a story about your childhood

would you say you’re an emotional person?

what do you consider to be romance?

what’s some good advice you want to share?

what are you doing right now?

what’s something you’ve always wanted to do but maybe been to scared to do?

what do you think of when you hear the word “home”?

if you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

name 3 things that make you happy

do you believe in ghosts and/or aliens?

favourite thing about the day?

favourite things about the night?

are you a spiritual person?

say 3 things about someone you love

say 3 things about someone you hate

what’s one thing you’re proud of yourself for?

fave season and why?

fave colour and why?

any nicknames?

do you collect anything?

what do you do when you’re sad?

what’s one thing that never fails to make you happy/happier?

are you messy or organised?

how many tabs do you have open right now?

any hobbies?

any pet peeves?

do you trust easily?

are you an open book or do you have walls up?

share a secret

fave song at the moment?

youtuber you’ve been obsessed with and why?

any bad habits?

(this post was stolen from @teenage-mutant-ninja-freak, since it couldn't be reblogged anymore)

[vaspider]

Spider, can I ask you and your followers for some input in a situation? I want some unbiased opinions, especially from parents of adult kids (bonus if your adult kids are disabled). I've tried to be as unbiased as possible and include both sides. I am aware that you're under no obligation to actually answer, but I'm hoping that if you're not able to provide any input, then one of your followers might be able to.

TLDR at the end.

The context:

Basically, I am an adult in my late 20s. I haven't lived with my parents since they threw me out at 19 for being diagnosed with autism and they were told that I wasn't capable of living independently without years of occupational therapy. I was homeless for 13 months. Like literally two days later, they dropped me off at work, confiscated my house keys, and said to find somewhere else to sleep because I wasn't coming back home. (My parents insist that I wasn't actually homeless because I already had my current job and was able to afford to stay at a youth homeless shelter. I say "what the fuck do you think Homeless Shelter means??") After that, I was able to get a government grant for chronically homeless youth that allowed me to get a room in a student housing complex. It's not dorms, but it works like a dorm. I do have a private room.

My bedroom of my apartment is a mess. My bedroom has always been a mess. I have AuDHD and multiple disabilities, including extreme fatigue so that's not unexpected. During lockdown, it was especially bad. I had to move out of my last apartment in 2021 because one of my roommates was a bigot and my building wanted a new tenet so they could charge more rent, so between the two of them, they forced me out for being a "safety concern" due to the mess (the roommate did things like lie and say I didn't bathe, even though I was literally still wet from the shower). My parents ended up helping me pack up my stuff and move to a new place. I've been here for a few years and my roommates here have always been okay with the mess because it stays confined to my room.

(Also I wrote this at like 5AM and I'm half asleep but I wasn't going to be able to go back to bed until I ask someone unbiased. So please excuse any typos, and I hope everything makes sense and nothing came out as gibberish because sometimes by brain refuses to Word Good.)

The problem:

My mother decided when I moved in that my dad was going to be inspecting my bedroom in order to make sure it's clean. He's been putting her off but she's been on his ass about it for three years so he's finally caved and said that next time he's here to bring me something (I cannot drive due to disabilities), that he would be inspecting my room.

I do not want my room inspected. I've been very clear about that since day one. Yes, my room is a mess, but I'm also a grownass adult. My parents say that since they've given me some money for my rent over the past few years that they're entitled to inspect my room. I say that it's a violation of my autonomy. My room is my safe space. My mother is an obsessively clean person so growing up, my room wasn't really mine, and everything had to be to her standards whether I liked it or not (including things like what color I paint my furniture that I owned).

My parents do not care about my boundaries, and would say that since I've proven incapable in the past (re: because I'm disabled, not that they'd ever admit it), that they're trying to protect me by keeping me from being kicked out again.

I am skeptical about this and believe it's more about controlling me (see: throwing me out for having autism and just generally being extremely controlling my entire life). My parents have refused to stop giving me money for my rent every now and then (I have a job and pay at least the majority of my rent, but there are some months where business is slow and I don't get many hours, and no one wants to hire me because I act Autistic and use a cane) and I end up short. I have resolved to do everything I can to not need their help, including having my sister pick up my prescriptions, in order to avoid my parents coming over and inspecting my room.

Also, my building already does quarterly inspections and they've always been okay with my room, but I know my room won't be to my parents' standards. I don't have any local friends that I could ask for help cleaning up, but like, I'm a Spoonie. I clean my toilet and then have to go lay down because I'm getting dizzy. I am not making much progress myself.

The question:

Are my parents right? Have I shown that I cannot be trusted to keep my room clean, thus entitling them to come inspect it to make sure it's not a mess. They will definitely yell at me and have threatened to withdraw what support they do give me if my room is a mess or I refuse to let them inspect it? Or am I right to put my foot down and enforce my boundaries?

Side note, my parents have a history of being abusive and controlling. That's something I had to prove to the government to get my grant. They would insist that it's not abuse. Some of it was quite bad but I'm not going to get into it here.

TLDR:

I'm an adult with disabilities who has my own apartment. My parents think they're entitled to come inspect my room to make sure it's clean. I say that it's my apartment and I say no. They have threatened to withdraw what support they do give me if I refuse. Are my parents being unreasonable, or am I the one being unreasonable for refusing?

Your parents have no right to inspect your room. You are an adult. This is your apartment, not theirs. Your mother is wrong. Your parents are being invasive. I think they think they're being reasonable bc they care about your well being, but they aren't respecting your autonomy.

Sometimes, being a parent means you gotta let your kids not do things the way you would or even not do things the way that is best for them. It's hard, but it's necessary.

If you still lived with your parents and your lack of cleanliness was affecting their lives, it might be different ... but this is just your parents being fucking weird.

[kxtsukixoxo]

hey so this is my first time requesting and idrk how to word this lolz 😓💔.

OKAY SO I HAVE AN IDEA OF PRO HERO!BAKUGO SMUT AT A GALA??!?!? like maybe a lil makeout before the event which leads to bathroom sex later on (^-^)

I REALLY DONT KNOW??!?! YOU COULD DO ANY CHARACTER YOU WANT OBVI (* >ω<) HAVE A GREAT DAY/NIGHT/AFTERNOON !!!

- ☆

HI LOVELY! i hope you like it! :3

needy

۶•ৎ katsuki x fem!reader

۶•ৎ tw!public sex, nsfw, minors dni!

۶•ৎ stealing glances of each other, after your heated makeout session in the car, your husbands not sure if he can wait til you two get home.

“do we really have to attend this useless gala?”

“don’t be stupid kats! ofc we do!” you playfully hit his chest, your husband and you sat in the back of the limo as you two drove to the huge gathering. pro heroes need a break every now and then right? katsuki definitely disagreed, hence the reason his agency reached out to you, his wife, to convince him to socialise among these other heroes.

Katsuki whined like a small child, crossing his arms as he sulked “don’t be a big baby!” the hotheaded blonde continued to pout. sighing at his stubbornness, an idea popped into your head. cupping your husbands cheek, you pulled him in for a kiss. it definitely took him by surprise, but he adjusted quickly. the slit in your dress making it easy for you to move, you were now straddling katsuki as he held each side of your waist, kneading the soft skin like dough. his teeth nipping at your lower lip, the lewd sounds and pants drowned into the music emitted from the radio. just as his hands were about to move down and cup your ass-

the car came to a halt, “we’re here!” your driver exhaled “dammit” Katsuki was pissed. beyond pissed. you giggled as you noticed the obvious tent in his pants “good luck soldier” you pressed a kiss against his cheek as he helped you out of the car. reporters complimenting, as to what a gentleman he is, being able to tell how much he loves his wife just by the way he looks at her. you two made your way into the huge hall, greeting your friends, you were glued to Katsukis side as he spoke to all of your old friends from UA, his grip on your waist was hard and firm. Katsuki leaned into your side, and whispered into your ear “i hope you know im hard as a damn rock right now, and that dress isn’t helping at all” you giggled and hit him in the arm

the night went on, playful glances from each other as you two mingled among the other pro’s. Uraraka and you were deep into a conversation and just as you were about to answer her, you heard your phone ring.

dismissing yourself from your friend group you made your way towards the bathroom, “kats i cannot believe-“ cut off by his lips smashing into yours, katsukis hands cupped your cheeks as your legs wrapped around his waist, carrying you towards the bathroom sink. “i can’t wait any longer, i need to feel you now” he muttered inbetween pants, your arms draped over his shoulders pulling him in closer as he kissed you again while he unbuckled his slacks.

“turn around for me baby” you flipped over as he pulled your dress just over your ass, landing a smack on your ass, causing you to whimper “quiet down doll, we don’t want the rest of them listening to me fuck you hm?” katsuki pushed your panties to the side, pressing his cock against your entrance. “please kats-“

“mmm what’s that?”

“need you so bad-”

“atta girl”

he slowly sunk into you, watching your eyes roll back, admiring your panting figure in the mirror. katsuki grabbed your hair with one hand, yanking it while the other held your waist. “god, (y/n) you’re fuckin’ sucking me in” your soft whimpers and katsukis pants and groans filled the room, mixing with the sound of skin slapping against skin. “m’ gonna cum!” katsukis thrusts grew wilder and wilder, rushing you to your high. “fuuuuuck that’s what i’m talkin’ about” he watched your cum drip down his cock, finally pulling out, turning you over and pressing a kiss to your lips.

“we should start attending more functions” a grin plastered across his face. “what, just so you can fuck me in the bathroom?” he chuckled and held you closer. “you know me so well baby” you rolled your eyes, “there’s a reason why i’m your wife y’know” you muttered.

•••

“where were you two!” kaminari called out as you two approached the huge group. “katsuki had a bit of a problem” you replied, scoffing at your statement, katsuki pulled you closer, leaning into you.

“we should definitely do that again”

[thewertsearch]

@elkian asked: PS - I think Sally can watch [S] Duodecim Rex Angelus at this point(?), but obvs I don't want to interrupt if she's on a roll lol @marinerofthestars asked: Since you’ve now finished Act 5, I think you can now watch (and react to when you have some time?) Rex Duodecim Angelus without risk of spoilers. It’s a 7-minute long fanmade Flash depicting the trolls’ battle against the Black King at the end of their session, hope you enjoy: https://youtu.be/-19Up0dLzNw @captorations asked: you've probably got a bunch of messages about this but. there's a fanfic out there that is the full text of strider-ified detective pony, and it is, unironically, one of the greatest fanworks ever created. i do not grant that title lightly, and i cannot recommend it enough. also! maybe i've forgotten and you did cover it, but. at this point i believe you're very much able to watch rex duodecim angelus, the fanmade flash of the trolls fighting their black king, without spoilers of any kind. some parts of act 6 can be a bit slow, so. if you need a break for action, it's there @joyfulldreams asked: By the way, since you've finished Act 5, you can absolutely watch Rex Duodecim Angelus now! (If you haven't already.) @transguyhawkeye asked: Not sure if anyones mentioned it yet but now that you've read the ancestor section you should be able to watch [s] Rex Duodecim Angelus spoiler-free! Anonymous asked: It looks like maybe no one's pointed out that you can now watch Rex Duodecim Angelus (which you were recommended in 2022 and 2023 but it was too early to watch then). You should definitely do that. Hussie declared it canonical, and Cat even suggested liveblogging it. Anonymous asked: OKAY YAY. There's a fan animation that I hear Hussie canonized called [S] Rex Duodecim Angelus and most people recommend that the earliest possible spot in a reading to view it is right after the completion of act 5. You don't have to liveblog it but I would LOVE it if you did. Anonymous asked: Augh I forgot to add that Rex Duodecim Angelus is of the troll session's fight against the black king. That would be worth mentioning. Especially so that you could dig up some of the references to the battle made in the comic ;>_> @morganwick asked: [...] this is a reminder that you used to go through the newsposts/blog posts/Formspring answers preserved in the Homestuck Collection, but you haven't done that in a while (cancelling it at the end of Act 4 in your haste to get to Act 5); were you thinking of catching up at the end of Act 5? I think you're close to the point where the Formspring stopped already. @likelyvampirical asked: [S] Rex Duodecim Angelus is now spoiler-free. On a related note, we've not had an episode of Tunes with Sally since November 2022. Maybe we could do some album reviews before coming back with Act 6?

Yup, it's finally time. After hearing about this legendary video for over a year and a half, today I'm going to check out one of Homestuck's most iconic fanworks, [S] Rex Duodecim Angelus!

I've heard from several people now that Hussie declared it canon, but no one's been able to track down a source for that just yet. Either way, it's clearly intended to be canon-compliant, so I'm interested in seeing how they handle the more ambiguous aspects of this fight, such as Gamzee's Rage attack.

On another note, I've deliberately placed Tunes with Sally on hiatus until later in the comic - mostly because the albums often contain songs from flashes we haven't seen yet, and I want to experience Homestuck's OST from within the comic first.

Finally, I promise I'll get to the Formspring eventually, as well as Hussie's news and blog posts. They're just not a giant priority, at the moment - but if anyone's got any specific Hussie quotes they'd like me to check out, feel free to send 'em in.

Anyways, I'll be watching Rex Duodecim Angelus after I've had dinner. Talk to y'all then!

[covenofagatha]

The Mile High Club

Jennifer Barkley x reader

When flying back to Washington, DC with your boss, Jennifer Barkley, she comes up with an interesting way to relax when there's some turbulence

Word count: 3.4k

Warnings: fingering, semi-public sex

“Ugh, why are there so many people here?” your boss, Jennifer Barkley, scoffs when the driver drops you off at the Indianapolis airport. 

After spending the last six weeks in Pawnee, Indiana on Bobby Newport’s campaign for city counsel, you and her are finally getting to go home back to Washington, DC. It’s been the first time in her career that she’s lost a campaign, but even she has to admit that Leslie Knope and Ben Wyatt did a really good job. 

It was the most engaged in a campaign you’ve ever seen Jen, the most challenged, and you’ve been working with her for about a year now. It was exciting to watch her strategize like this, hot even. You’ve always had a thing for powerful, older women, and that was the definition of Jen Barkley. She oozes confidence and she’s not afraid of how good at her job she is. 

The two of you have a pretty good relationship — you’re actually the longest assistant she’s ever had, so clearly you’re doing something right. The easy banter between you is one of your favorite parts of the job. 

You glance at her as you take her suitcase out of the trunk and then yours, putting them on the ground and groaning with the effort. She’s wearing a navy blue blazer over a striped pink and gray button-down, with a gray pencil skirt, her signature string of pearls around her neck. Her brown hair is perfectly fluffed and curly, with makeup accentuating her lips and eyes. She looks good. 

“Well, I offered for us to fly out of the Pawnee airport, but you said, and I quote, ‘I don’t trust Pawnee to have planes that aren’t just tiny steel death in the sky—’”

“‘— that will fall apart if you breathe too loudly,’” Jen finishes with a chuckle at her own joke at the small town’s expense. She’s been making a lot of them the entire trip. “Yeah, I remember. I just still can’t believe the private jet had routine maintenance scheduled for today and now we have to fly with them. God, if only Knope and Wyatt hadn’t insisted on that recount.” 

By “them,” you know she means normal people who don’t run congressional campaigns for some of the most powerful people in the country and don’t just have access to private transportation whenever they want it. 

And without the recount, Jen and you would’ve been done a few days earlier. You still remember her little meltdown where she collapsed on the table, whining about wanting to leave, and it brings a smile to your lips. 

You roll your eyes fondly and grab both of the handles of the suitcase. “Well, we’re still in first class, so you won’t have to sit with all the peasants,” you tease. 

Jen points at you and moves her finger back and forth for emphasis. “That…that was a good one,” she decides and you can’t help but feel warm with her approval. And then she swats at your hand that is holding onto her bag. “I can wheel my own suitcase, sweetheart.” 

You mutter a half-hearted apology and follow her through the doors of the airport and go to the counter to check your luggage. Jen starts digging through her purse and you raise an eyebrow and wait for her to ask you for something. 

It’s always fun to watch your boss go as long as she can without willingly asking for help, even if you have exactly what she needs. Her tenacity and stubbornness often go hand-in-hand. 

She huffs exasperatedly before looking up and giving you a prize-winning smile. “Honey, do you happen to know where I put my—”

You reach into your pocket and pull out her boarding pass, reaching it out with a smirk. 

“Thanks, doll,” she says and snatches it from you before examining it like you may have given her the wrong one. You always keep an extra copy of all her documents on you at all times, just in case situations like this ever arise. “God, I cannot wait to be home and not sleep in sheets that smell like mothballs.” 

Giggling despite yourself, you think back to the small motel rooms the two of you had to sleep in. “It wasn’t all bad. JJ’s Diner was pretty cute.” 

“Yeah, after I bought them that cappuccino maker,” she retorts. “Everyone there was a moron. Did you know one of them told me they voted for Leslie because I said she was a dog murderer? Another thought I was Bobby’s sister. As if he and I could possibly share any of the same genes. Did you see him try to sound out ‘Connecticut’?”

It makes you snort. People in Pawnee were surely not the brightest. 

“I almost pity Leslie,” she sighs as the two of you move up in line. “You could not pay me enough money to trade places with her. I love my life way too much.” 

You laugh. “That’s good to hear, because I need someone to boss me around.” It’s meant to be a light quip, but there’s no mistaking the innuendo and Jen smirks before looking you up and down. You’re wearing leggings and an oversized T-shirt — nothing special, especially compared to her. But you’d rather be comfortable for the flight, rather than look as professional as you usually do. 

“Don’t worry, hon. I’d bring you with me,” she reassures with a wink and your cheeks heat up, breath catching in your throat. She’s just being nice, you think. You are a good assistant. 

After you check your bags, you walk to the gate with Jen next to you, typing something one-handed on her phone and occasionally bumping into you. Boarding is in about thirty minutes, so you tell Jen you’re going to get something to eat. You end up choosing a soft-serve stand and get her a cup too. 

When you get back to her, she’s now reading a newspaper that she must have bought, and doesn’t look up at you until your arm starts to get tired holding out her ice cream. 

“Well, aren’t you sweet,” she purrs and takes it from you, ignoring the spoon and just licking a stripe straight through the swirl. Your eyes widen — you feel a tug in your stomach and you rush to sit down next to her and think about anything else. 

You busy yourself by scrolling on your phone until it’s time to board, and then you settle into your seat in first class next to Jen. You’ve only flown first class a few times, but you’re not sure you could ever go back to sitting in economy. Your seats are spacious and luxurious, with fancy screens in the backs of the chairs in front of you. There’s an armrest between you and your boss, with a piece that could slide up to separate you, but you make no moves toward it and neither does Jen. 

The flight attendant comes around and gets your drink orders, a coffee for Jen and a hot chocolate for you. She snorts when your drink comes back with a mound of whipped cream and you take a long sip, appreciatively humming when the warmth spreads through your body. 

“Oh, honey, you’ve got a little—” Jen says when you turn to look at her, and you scrunch your eyebrows before she cups your chin and swipes her thumb across your upper lip. 

You freeze and your heart rate spikes. 

When she pulls her hand back, there’s a smear of whipped cream on her thumb. She smirks before sucking it into her mouth, never breaking eye contact. You feel your body get warm and you shiver. 

“Are you cold?” she asks. Before you can tell her that you’re fine, she’s waved the flight attendant over and asked for a blanket. It’s touching to have this badass woman you’re always chasing after trying to take care of you. 

The stewardess brings a heated blanket over and Jen helps you tuck it around yourself despite you muttering that you’re really okay. 

And then the safety video plays on the screen and the plane takes off. You’ve never been great with flying and you try to distract your anxious mind with a movie. 

It works until the plane starts to shake. Your hands fly to the armrests and dig your fingers into them as if that will steady it. It doesn’t; if anything, it just gets worse and a small whimper escapes your lips. 

Jen, who is reading a different newspaper now, glances over at you and must see the panic evident on your face, because she lays a hand on top of yours. “Are you okay?” There’s an uncharacteristic gentleness to her voice and you wonder if she’s going soft from the exhaustion of having been in Pawnee for six weeks.  

“Yeah,” you say through clenched teeth. There’s another rough patch and the plane dips and you sharply inhale. You expect her to laugh, maybe make fun of you, but her eyes are understanding and she starts to stroke her fingers up and down your forearm. 

Is she trying to comfort you? You swallow roughly as her warmth seeps through your skin. “It’s okay,” she coos. “It’s going to be fine.” 

You nod and try to repeat the words to yourself until you believe them, but the plane shakes again and you shudder. “Oh, god,” you whisper, feeling a little sick. Jen is frowning next to you and closes the little cabin door on the aisle, essentially hiding the two of you from view of anyone else. 

“Just breathe. Try to relax, honey,” she says soothingly, and then apparently decides she’s being too nice, because she tosses her hair over her shoulder and huffs haughtily. “Don’t let a bit of wind scare you. There’s so many other things to be more afraid of. Like me, if you don’t relax.” 

It makes you smile a little and your muscles loosen ever so slightly. The turbulence stops and you’re able to breathe normally. 

Seemingly satisfied, Jen turns back to her newspaper and removes her hand off your arm. You miss her touch, but brush it off and start scrolling through the screen to find a movie to watch. 

The plane starts to shake violently and a terrified gasp slips out of your lips, hands scrambling for purchase and your legs tensing against the seat in front of you. This is it. 

You can practically hear Jen roll her eyes and she gives you a pointed look. 

“I’m sorry,” you say, breathing heavily. “How are you so calm?” 

Jen shrugs. “I’m exceptional,” she states matter-of-factly. Her fingers reach over to lay on your forearm again and you’re able to feel yourself relax. Just slightly, but she feels it too. “Is that helping?” she murmurs. 

“Yeah,” you rasp and she smirks. 

Her fingers trail up your arm and then back down, and slide into your lap and ghost over your thigh. All the air leaves your lungs. “Do you want some more help?” 

Surely she can’t be offering what you think she is. But there’s not a single hint of jest on her face with her eyebrow arched and her pupils blown out. “Jen—” you swallow, your mouth suddenly so dry. 

“You can say no,” she reminds you. She lifts her hand off the blanket and hovers over it, showing that she’ll accept whatever you say. 

But you couldn’t even dream of rejecting her. “Please,” you say, voice suddenly full of heat, and your boss looks absolutely overjoyed. 

She drags part of the bunched up blanket covering the lower half of your body over herself, so if anyone were to look over the top of the cabin when she sneaks a hand under the cover and rests it on your leg, they wouldn’t be able to see. 

The plane rocks and dips, but you couldn’t care less because Jen has just dipped into the waistband of your leggings, her cold hands making you hiss. 

“Why don’t you put on a movie?” she suggests, her hand moving lower and cupping you over your underwear. You can feel yourself starting to get wet and you nod, tapping on the screen and clicking on the first thing it opens to. The film starts, but Jen’s fingers have found your clit and you can think of very little else. 

She rubs around it for a bit, teasing and feeling the crotch of your panties grow wetter while you squirm and try to get more stimulation. 

“You got to stop being so obvious, honey,” she whispers, ducking her head down to scrape her teeth against the top of your ear before nibbling on your lobe. You can’t stop the small moan that escapes you and she presses down on your clit. “Do you want the flight attendants to come over and see what a slut you’re being?” 

Heat tears through your body and you clench around nothing. You’d like to point out that this was all her idea, but you don’t want to risk her pulling away to teach you a lesson for talking back, which is exactly what Jennifer Barkley would do. 

So you shake your head and try to act like you’re watching the movie, but your eyes keep straying down to the blanket. 

She tuts lowly in your ear before sliding your underwear to the side and you jump when her fingers trace through your folds. “God, you like this a lot, don’t you,” she observes, amusement leaking into her voice. You blush and nod, softly whimpering when she teases your clit without touching it. 

“Jen, please, I need you,” you whine, and she chuckles humorlessly before pushing a finger inside you. She’s met with absolutely no resistance, and your walls bear down around her immediately, drawing a small gasp from her mouth. You’re vaguely aware of the sound of the drink cart coming down the aisle. 

She doesn’t move at first, just enjoying the feeling of you being around her, and it isn’t until you choke out another plea that she starts to slowly withdraw and then thrust back in. 

The flight attendant comes into view over the cabin walls and by the looks of it, she’s about two rows ahead of you. Your head tilts toward Jen, who is already watching you, a wicked glint in her eye. Her thumb expertly rubs at your clit while her one finger fucks you at a leisurely pace. It’s not enough to get you there, but the possibility of being caught and the way Jen’s eyes are burning into your face, watching every little twitch, are helping build the tension in your stomach. 

The stewardess stops at the row in front of yours and if she looked to her right just a little, she would see your knuckles straining as your fingers grip the armrests to try and stop yourself from reacting. 

“Better behave, honey,” Jen whispers dangerously, tongue flicking out against your earlobe. It makes you shiver and clench around her finger. “Don’t want her to know how naughty you’re being right now.” 

She smirks at your muffled whimper and finally gives your clit the direct stimulation you’ve been looking for and you have to clamp a hand over your mouth to stop any other noises from crawling out. 

The flight attendant pushes the cart forward and pauses, looking at you and Jen over the cabin door with a warm smile. Jen pulls her finger out of you and you bite your lip at the sudden emptiness. 

“Hi ladies, can I get you anything else?” she asks, looking at Jen first. 

“Oh, I’m perfect, thank you,” Jen gushes, and then turns to you. You can feel both Jen and the flight attendant’s eyes on you. 

You nod in agreement and open your mouth to answer, but Jen chooses that exact moment to shove two fingers inside you, and you’ve never heard the sound that comes out of you before. You see her stifle a laugh in your peripheral vision and you plaster what you hope is a convincing smile onto your face, but probably looks more like a grimace. “I’m good,” you squeak. 

Jen’s fingers curl roughly and your hips jolt. 

The flight attendant looks like she wants to say something, but purses her lips tightly and moves on. The second she’s out of earshot, Jen laughs cruelly in your ear. “That was close, honey,” she mocks and scissors her fingers to stretch you out and you hiss. “Do you think she knows that you’re taking my fingers like such a good slut? That this was the only way I could get you to relax?” 

She presses her thumb against your clit and starts to thrust into you fast and you have to bite down on your hand to keep from crying out. The pleasure starts to spread from your pussy to your stomach to all over and you feel your orgasm building. 

“Jen, I — please, fuck,” you groan when she twists her fingers. Your hands are scrambling for purchase on the armrests, hips rolling as much as they can, and you can feel your head start to spin. 

“God, hon, your cunt feels so good around me,” she says conversationally and your head falls back against the seat, clenching violently. “So warm, so wet. Think I might have you ride my fingers while I have to sit in all those boring meetings.” 

Your whimper is one of a wounded animal and she grins, flashing her perfect teeth at you. It turns you on even more, how perfectly composed she is, while you’re a fucking mess in the chair next to her, a few miles above the ground, in a plane where you could get caught at any moment. 

“Please, I’m so close,” you beg quietly, one of your hands clasping onto hers over the blanket. You can feel her muscles move as she thrusts into you and you gasp, heat searing through you. 

Jen leans over and nudges your head to the side with her own before sucking on your neck. You keen softly and your chest rises and falls rapidly, your orgasm steadily approaching. 

You slouch down even further in your seat so that her fingers can reach deeper inside you and it makes your eyes roll back in your head. “So good,” you whisper and Jen huffs in agreement. 

Her thumb speeds up on your clit and her fingers hits the spot that makes sparks erupt in your cunt each time and you’re so fucking close —

“Cum for me, honey,” she rasps, and it’s strangely what makes you finally cum isn’t the way her fingers curl particularly deliciously when your hips meet her thrust perfectly, it’s not the way her thumb presses harder on your clit when she circles it again, it’s not the way her tongue draws a hot stripe up your throat — it’s the flustered, pink tint in her cheeks and her slightly uneven breathing and the way her eyes dart from yours down to your lips and then back up. 

It’s knowing that she’s affected by you falling apart for her: that's the final nail in the coffin, and your pussy walls spasm around her fingers, pleasure erupting through your trembling body while you sink your teeth into your bottom lip to stop yourself from crying out. 

She fucks you through your orgasm, whispering what a good girl you are, and you finally slump back into your chair, feeling ruined and much more relaxed. 

“Did that help?” Jen asks, wearing a playful smirk. 

You laugh at the sheer ridiculousness of her question. Of course it fucking helped. “Yeah, I’d say so.” And you’d like nothing more than to kiss the smug look right off her face. 

The pilot comes on the intercom and announces that you’ll soon be starting your departure into DC and you breathe a sigh of relief. 

“Thank you,” you say, for getting you through your anxiety and fear about the turbulence, and for fucking you. Something you’ve been wanting since you started working for her. 

Jen knows exactly what you mean and she presses a quick kiss to your forehead. “Anytime.” 

@lostbutlovely33 @diorrxckstar @whoreforolderfictionalwomen  @katekathry @onemansdreamisanothermansdeath @tayasmellsapples @natashashill @mybraininblood @mysticalmoonlight7  @cactuslover2600 @loveem0mo @readysteddiero-nance @lonelyhalfwitch @lesbiantortilla @crescendoofstars @sol-in-wonderland @ahsfan05 @gbab09 @sasheemo @agathaharness @live-laugh-love-lupone @chiar4anna @fuckedupforkhahn @lowlyjelly

[scarlettriot]

Alright. I simply cannot get the idea of getting hot and heavy in the back of some limo with Ei and a little sprinkle of sneaking around too. I don’t know where this came from or anything so here. I’m leaving it. And that’s all.

It’s sorta smutty so no minors or ageless. They’re aged up, in case that wasn’t self explanatory. Reader gets a little jealous. Other than that it’s basically just fluff with fucking.

I did not proof this what so ever. Sorry. I’m tired. I don’t even have a rough word count for you but it’s pretty short.

The two of you leaving together after some big award show after he finally breaks into the top 10. Only you’re most certainly not the woman his agencies PR team has been setting him up on dates with. The super model who’s been all over him, the face of his active wear line, the woman they want to see him with.

He’s been putting on a good show for them. Even dipped her in front of all the camera the red carpet was lined with and kissed her as a hundred flashes went off.

But, gods, she’s just not you. The cute little waitstaff always serving drinks at these events. The black skirt they make you wear hugs your curves so tightly and he can see every dip of your plush hips and he remembers what it was like the first time he got to feel you.

He was stiff in his perfectly tailored pants before the hors d’oeuvres came around. 

The first chance he got, he’d slipped away. Thankfully, his accomplishments were already recognized. He’d done his part, stood up, waved, went on stage, he didn’t give a damn about anything or anyone else. He just needed to find you again.

“I— oh fuck— I’m gonna have to get back before someone realizes I’m— I’m— right there, right there, yes please—!” It was too hard to think when his fingers were buried deep within your cunt.

He had you propped up on the back of his limo. Making you cum with your skirt all bunched up. “Don’t think you gotta go anywhere yet, pretty,” he chuckles and licks off his fingers.

“I do though, I do,” you tried forming a sentence, “I could get fired,”

He pulled your legs around him and carried you around to the door to slip inside with you. “Told you I’d get you a job at my agency, then you wouldn’t have to worry about this job.”

You sucked on his neck as he undid his belt, “don’t know how your girlfriend would feel about me working with you daily… having this happen far more often?” Because you’re not stupid, you knew if you took him up on that offer you’d be on his dick every chance the two of you had.

“She’s not my girlfriend and you know it.” He made that abundantly clear the first time he made a move on you months ago and you questioned him.

He’d just barely slipped his cock free before you were sinking down on it with a groan that would reply in his head for a lifetime. “I don’t think she knows that.”

He chuckles and it makes you clench around him. “You’re real cute when you’re jealous,” hands grip hard on your hips and he pushes you down as he grits out, “and if she does know it, that’s—not— my— problem—” rocking his hips to watch your eyes roll back.

“You’ve said it yourself though, she’s what your PR team wants. I’m nothing like her.”

He huffed before his arms wound under your legs so he could hold you up and fuck up into you as he damn well pleased. “Also told you that I don’t care what they want. You say the word and it’ll be you on my arm at these events, not her.”

You laughed before he made it into a blissed out moan.

“What? Don’t believe me?”

The windows were fogging up, anyone walking by would damn well know what was happening here. And he didn’t care at all. He’d bullied himself into you over and over again, tearing at your little outfit, unable to help himself.

Of course, you didn’t seem to mind with the way you were babbling now, tits bouncing with your head tossed back, pleasure coursing through you. “What’s the matter, pretty? Can’t do anything more than moan for me now? Should I stop and letcha think?”

His pace slowed and you cried out, “noooo!”

“Then answer me, baby, you believe me, don’t you?” Gods, for a man railing you within an inch of your life, his tone was soft and sickeningly sweet. “Promise if ya let me I’ll do this to you all night long.” Not that these quickies weren’t fun but just once he wants to see you splayed out in his bed. “I’ll make you cum over and over, as much as you want.”

He took your chin and made sure you were looking at him as he added. “I want you. For more than just a fast fuck at a party. Lemme take care of you, in every possibly way there is.”

With his cock filling you up so completely, and his eyes carrying so much hope, how could you ever deny him?

[httpknjoon]

The Late, Late Show Take-Over | myg

main masterlist | series masterlist | want to request?

plot | that time in december where popstar!yn takes over the late, late show along with her band to celebrate her ep's release. (alternative plot: that time yn interviewed her bassist, yoongi live)

w.c | 5.2K

pairing | bass guitarist!yoongi x popstar!reader, a little harry styles x popstar!reader there hehe

genre | fluff, enemies to lovers, popstar x bassist

note | set in december, so a lot of holiday references there. also, think of the show as a mix of every American talk show haha i'll be mixing up segments.

main masterlist | series masterlist | want to request?

@.harryspotted: harry is seen by some fans in a cafe in nyc

@.harryfan1: i think the rumors are true! harry might be guesting on the late late show tonight

@.harryfan2: omg new ynharry content after nine years????

@.ynthepopicon: @.YNOfficial please confirm don’t give us false hopes queen

YN cannot help but smile at the posts she reads on Twitter as she runs on the treadmill for a quick morning workout before her busy day. After two weeks of working on it, today is the day she will be releasing her anticipated holiday EP. And along with that, YN will be taking over The Late Late Show to create more buzz.

So after her last show in Philly, she went straight to her ride to New York and immediately sent into a quick one-hour meeting with the producers and writers of the show. It was hectic. YN admittedly didn't remember anything after that meeting and was just glad to be back on a bed in her hotel room at 1:00 AM.

Then she got up at six for her morning routine, which included this little workout.

"Thought Harry is still in LA at this time?" you turned to Cal, who was running next to you.

"I thought so too. I guess he's excited to see you again." she teased while heaving.

You chuckled, shaking your head. It was never confirmed if you and Harry Styles ever had a romantic relationship. But back in your younger years, you two were often photographed together at various events and places. He was still in a boyband at that time while you were just a starting artist. The photographs and clips lasted for only a few months and were never brought publicly by you or Harry. Some fans think that maybe you two really had a thing, but a few believe it's probably just something PR for your then-small career.

You were enjoying the tweets of anticipation for your show tonight when a few tweets made you stop scrolling. Turning to Cal once again, you tapped her arm and made her read the tweets.

@.ynfan123: i think we should petition for a yoongi interview tonight. even a very short one

@.ynfan456: we need to hear his voice atp

@.ynfan789: he's the only one in the band who wont get into ig live

@.ynisontour: WE!!! NEED!!! YOONGI!!! TO!!! SAY!!! SOMETHING!!!

“So have yourself a merry little Christmas now…”

Singing the last line of the song she will be performing later, YN finds herself laying her back down on the stage of The Late Late Show studio. It’s only nine in the morning and she is already thinking of her hotel bed and comfy weighted blanket wrapped around her. She has been rehearsing for her hosting stint for tonight for almost two hours now, wanting to make sure everything will be perfect later.

You were so ready to give up on the heaviness of your eyelids when you felt Cal’s shadow hovering over you. You squint your eyes.

“Is a break possible?” the tired singer asked.

Your assistant and also manager offered her hand, helping you get up, “Of course. But you need to get back in an hour for a meeting with Paul to finalize your wardrobe."

"Okay, thank you. I need to get coffee or maybe just take some air outside." you sighed.

Luckily, one of the band members heard you. Noah joined your and Cal's conversation.

"We're getting coffee too. Fred's taking us to his favorite cafe here, you should join!" He grinned.

You smiled and turned to Cal as if she were your mother and you were asking for permission. Normally, just to be careful, she will come with you or make you have your own bodyguard, especially since you're currently in the Big Apple. But knowing that you have the band around you, Cal nodded her head. You smiled even wider as Noah pulled you along with him after you got your small bag.

“I swear, you’ll thank me the moment you get a sip of their latte.”

Fred was in the middle of telling Akio something when you and Noah joined them, waiting for an elevator. Yoongi was quiet next to them, in his usual blank expression. He didn’t even say anything when you stood next to him, never a small talker. Crossing your arms over your chest, you pursed your lips, contemplating if you should greet him or something. Because it felt like there was this big ice in this a foot of distance between you and Yoongi. It’s weird as if you haven’t slept on his bed nights ago or stayed up all night making music together. 

“Oops, I’m sorry.”

The silence was broken down when Noah cleared his throat and accidentally hit your sides with his hips, making you lose balance and fall into your bassist who was quick to catch you. Instinctively, his hands were on your waist while you turned your head to him with wide eyes from surprise at Noah’s action. You looked up at Yoongi, not realizing how close his face was to yours. For a moment, Fred and Akio’s chatter faded into an inaudible muffle and everything in the background was blurry and his face was the only thing that was sharp in your sight. Your breath hitched, there was something in your throat when your eyes met. Yours was still surprised while he was calm. Everything felt like a slo-mo.

“You okay?”

And Yoongi was the first to talk. You wished you were as relaxed as him in everything. The moment you realized you were staring, you immediately got back to your feet and removed his hands from your waist, which made Yoongi raise his brow and step back.

“I’m sorry-”

“No, no. It’s fine.” You cut him off, still panicking with that quick but also slow feeling you felt. What the fuck is that? “I-I think I’m just having a long morning.”

You’re stuttering and you don’t like it. As you question yourself internally, all Yoongi can see is you looking away with a confused look on your face. Your eyebrows are scrunched together while chewing on your lower lip, it’s turning white. He looked away, smiling at something else.

Suddenly, there is a high-pitched ‘ding’ when the elevator finally arrives empty. You don’t know what the fuck happened because you ended up behind Fred, Akio, and Noah while Yoongi stood next to you. They seemed like walls, hiding you and your bassist, as they chatted about something. You gulped, feeling obligated now to break the silence between you and Yoongi.

“So… is this your first late-night show gig?” you asked, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Nope.” he replied, popping that ‘p’ with his answer. “You?”

“Oh, uhm… Not my first time, I guest on them every time I’m promoting something. But this is my first time hosting.” you replied with a tight smile at the end.

He hummed, nodding. He seemed uninterested, you thought. So you just hummed too, looking away. The elevator stopped and the doors slid open. It’s still not your floor, but another smaller group gets in, making your human walls make more space for the others while you step closer to Yoongi. Was it too close? Because his crisp, earthy fragrance smells so good and you wanted to ask what perfume is it, but it will just probably feed his ego. You hate it– not the scent. But the way you’ve been feeling right now. You’re probably just tired. You nodded at that. Yeah, that’s probably the only right answer to why are you feeling this weird around him.

“I think there are paparazzi outside,” Akio said, looking back to you, when you finally got out of the elevator and were about to walk out the building.

You sighed, “Of course, there are. It’s fine. How about you guys? You’re okay with being papped?”

There’s a collective ‘it’s fine’ and ‘I don’t care’ from the band, making you smile. Without talking about it, Akio and Noah stood on each of your sides. While Yoongi and Fred talked in front of you. This way, your band acted like a great wall around you. Yes, the paparazzi still caught you in your matching large sweatshirt and pants. But they only got small glimpses of you having conversations with your friends. You waved at some fans outside the building, waiting for their tickets for tonight’s show. But didn’t stop for any photo.

“Oh my god! Is it true? Harry’s guesting?” a fan asked and squealed when you simply winked at her direction.

As you and your group walked away, Noah asked, “Were you and Harry really a thing?”

You chuckled, “Maybe you’ll know later.”

“Oh my god, I cannot believe I’ll see him up close later. I used to be like the biggest Directioner in my whole class in eighth grade.” Akio fangirled.

“Yoongi used to work with him! Aren’t you?” Fred brought up, nudging him.

“Yep, for his first two albums,” he replied casually.

“Wasn’t there a rumor that few of his songs in his first album were about YN?!” Akio giggled. “Is that true?”

Oh, you know about those rumors and you definitely heard the songs, even those from their band’s last album. You don’t know if Yoongi worked on them too. But the moment you two locked eyes for a few seconds after Akio asked that, you figured maybe he does know something about that, even though he’s a little hard to read.

But he simply shrugged, “I don’t know.”

“Didn’t know you were seeing my mate, Yoongi, like that.”

After rehearsing and meetings, you still found time to catch up with an old friend. You sat across him in one of the coziest and lowkey restaurants in the city. You two were already past the greetings and had been enjoying your lunch for almost twenty minutes when he brought that up.

Your head tilted slightly, “I honestly don’t know what you’re talking about, H.”

Harry chuckled, a dimple appearing on his cheek, before showing you a screenshot of an article on his phone, “It’s all over the internet. A friend sent me this earlier because they know I worked with Yoongi and I’m in New York for your show.”

The article was just a malicious rumor based on the paparazzi photos taken earlier today when you were getting coffee with the band.

“’M just messin’ with you, angel. I think I’m usually the first one to know if something’s just a rumor.” Harry laughed. 

With how many relationships he had, real and fake, you know Harry would be the first one to recognize a rumor. He basically grew up in the industry and even though you two broke up years ago, Harry is usually the first one to contact you every time he sees crazy, untrue news about you just to tease you about it.

“But you do seem a bit flustered being linked with him,” he whispered before sipping his red wine.

“What?! No, I’m not– We actually hate each other.” you exhaled. Your voice unconsciously got higher when you said that.

He still has the stupid smirk on his face when he puts down his glass, “Easy there, angel. No need to get all fiery. Your nose is doing that little flare thing again.”

You paused as your hands held your nose as if it would do anything, “What?”

“I’ve mentioned before, haven’t I? When you’re fibbing, your cute nose gives you away,” he said in a matter-of-fact tone like everyone knows that. “Quit with the pout, angel. You’re far too cute to pull that off.”

He winked with a cheeky grin, making you roll your eyes. You two were always flirty with each other just for funsies, so you don’t really mind his little nickname for you that started when you two were dating or even the little teasings. Just like now, when he reached out just to pinch your nose softly.

“I’m just worried about being linked to him, H. I don’t want any more drama in my life.” you shared.

“What are you worried about, angel? I know Yoongi, he’s a good guy. Unlike that idiot you dated for–”

“Not that! I’m not saying I am interested in dating him. I’m just worried about being linked to him because– Isn’t he dating anyone?” you asked him as Yoongi mentioned his fiancee a couple of times ago. 

“I don’t know.” his voice trailed off as he thinks. “But I was really keen to have him on my last tour, but his fiancee was not a fan of a long-distance thing.”

“See?! That’s why I hate being linked to him like that. Don’t want to be labeled as a homewrecker like that.” 

This time, you took a subtle jab at him before sipping in your glass just to hide the small smile. You see him squint his eyes at you, picking up that small reference you made with one of his recent relationships.

“Alright, angel. No need to air out my dirty laundry… Moving on!”

The rest of your day got more hectic. More rehearsals, more meetings, and you even filmed more promotional materials for social media alone and with your guests: two for Harry and a few with the band. There was an online poll posted online for whom band member your audience wants you to interview and of course, your co-producer of your recent EP. The other band members were relieved to hear that as they were really rooting for Yoongi to be the one to take it for the team.

“Go on. You are the spokesperson of the band.” Akio encouraged him as they stayed in their dressing room.

“Since when?” Yoongi asked, and the rest of the band laughed. “I am the quietest one here. It will make more sense if Noah shows up.”

“No, you are the fan favorite, so you need to show up!” Noah laughed, enjoying the moment.

Fred joins in, “Plus you are a producer in her EP. So it will make more sense if you talk tonight.”

Yoongi knew they were right, so he begrudgingly said yes when the producers asked him for his appearance tonight as your second guest. They told him that it would only be a ten-minute interview, making Yoongi wonder what you two could talk about since you two were pretty awkward earlier while waiting for the elevator. It’s ironic to have him on a talk show when he does not really talk much. He doesn’t think he is as interesting as your other guest.

At exactly 11:30 PM, the show began. A pre-recorded skit earlier was shown on television screens as your cold open. You were seen hailing a famous New York yellow cab, in your off-shoulder, fur-hemmed, velvet, red mini dress with matching long gloves. Bringing out your compact mirror, you swiped your red lipstick over your lips. The cab driver’s eyes were shot looking at you through the rearview mirror and then to the road. Back and forth.

You looked back at him, “Eyes on the road, please! Got a schedule to catch on here, sir.”

Flustered, the cab driver, an actor, nodded. Then suddenly, the cab unexpectedly stopped because of the long, noisy traffic ahead of you. You looked at the camera and rolled your eyes.

“Of course, it’s my [redacted] worst enemy. [redacted] traffic,” you spoke. The curse words were redacted hilariously, making your audience laugh. You poked your head outside the open car window, “Can we go one, please?! I have a show to host tonight!”

The next scene is you running into the building. A guard stops you for an ID, but you don’t get one.

“I’m taking over Max River’s show tonight! I’m YN.” 

The guard was unbothered. In his deep voice, he says, “Yeah, sure, and I’m Marcello Hernandez. Whatever. Please leave the building if you cannot bring out any identification card, ma’am.”

You bit your lower lip as you felt helpless and hurried, looking around. That’s when someone showed up to distract the guard. Your studio audience screamed when they recognized who it was.

“Oh, hey, Johnny!” Harry greeted the guard, pulling him in for a bro hug.

You took the opportunity and ran away. The elevator dinged and you immediately speed-walk in the long carpeted hallway of the floor. Various crew members greet you, fist-bumping you, and instructing you until you stand in front of the high curtains. 

A familiar crew of the show handed you your microphone, “Good luck, YN.”

The live studio audience applauds as the curtain slowly opens, showing you in the same red dress. The band began playing the instrumentals for one of your new songs. You sang A Nonsense Christmas with your dancers in the background. After that, your audience cheered as you moved to the short monologue.

“Good evening, everyone! Welcome to the Late, Late Show– Or dare I say, Welcome to the Late, Late Holiday Show with yours truly.” you smiled as your fans clapped. "Also, The Roots are on their holiday break. So, please welcome my amazing band! Akio on keyboards! Noah on guitar! Fred on drums! And of course, Yoongi on bass guitar!" The audience cheered on every member you introduced and of course, someone got a noticeable, louder cheers. “How are we feeling tonight?” 

“So… Max Rivers really thought it was a festive idea to make me his holiday episode’s host. He probably hasn’t seen my shows recently.”

The audience laughed, knowing that you were talking about the negative reviews you’ve been getting from conservatives who saw some short clips from your show. Some people just won’t stop complaining about how your concert shows are not “family-friendly” and “too sexual”, as if you promoted it that way. You didn’t. You were literally wearing an almost-lingerie in your photoshoot for the tour as part of the concept you were aiming for.

“Anyway, my holiday EP, Midnight Mistletoe, was just released last night.” you grinned at the positive response. “And let’s be honest, I am here to plug it and make sure you all will hear about it all night.” They laughed. You turned to the other camera. “Midnight Mistletoe, out now. Available in whatever your streaming app is.” You winked as they laughed harder.

“Christmas is in a few days and all I can feel is everyone’s holiday joy. And this season is all about giving, isn’t it?” your audience agreed. “So lemme give the internet a lot to talk about tonight.” 

Smirking, you continued, “Yes, it’s true. I am single.” your fans cheered. “Critics and some of my fans say it’s the best holiday miracle they’ve seen these last few years.” the audience laughed, letting everyone know that you are aware of your fans’ negative feelings about your ex back then you were still dating him on and off.  

“Speaking of miracles, it’s a miracle that I’m still here, considering the amount of accidents I had in my tour these last few months.” On cue, the screens show a quick compilation of your mini slips and falls during your shows. ���Looking like a little reindeer on ice over there.” The audience laughed. 

“But hey, if I can survive a breakup, go on tour, and release a holiday EP, maybe I can be a great host for you guys tonight. Am I right?” everyone cheered. “So, buckle up! Grab your eggnog, and let’s make this night something festive to remember!”

After a five-minute commercial, the show is back and you are now sitting at the iconic late-night show desk, ready to introduce your first guest, “So our first guest for tonight is a three-time Grammy Award winner and a member of one of the most successful bands in the world. He is no stranger to generating headlines and making everyone’s hearts race with his voice and looks. He’s one of my best friends in the world, the one and only, Harry Styles!”

The fans’ reactions were loud, eating up the jazzy instrumental of ‘As It Was’ your band was playing. You stood up to greet your friend, who‘s wearing a green Gucci suit, as he walked out the curtains, running straight to your open arms. Unexpectedly, he picked you up and spun you around. You laughed, holding down the back of your dress’s skirt.

“Hello, everyone.” he waved at the audience, whose response was roaring in the studio. He sat on the sofa while you sat back on your chair. “Hi, YN.”

“Hello, Harry. Welcome to the show!” you smiled even though tonight’s conversation felt a little less casual with how you two don’t address each other with your nicknames. “It’s so nice to finally see you again after our break up ten years ago.”

Caught off guard, he choked, then laughed along with the audience at your sarcastic statement, “I know, it’s been so long. It was so hard to look you in the eye again after our long and tumultuous one-month affair.”

He was quick to join you in your sarcasm. In public, they only knew about you and Harry going out for a month. But only a few people around you know that the public caught up late and you went out for almost a year after a paparazzi caught you two leaving the hotel his band was staying at during their show in LA years ago.

“Glad you moved on from me, bud.” you patted his shoulders and he nodded, chuckling. 

The audience laughed, loving the chemistry between you and Harry. The conversation went on as you asked him about his plans and preparations for the holidays. He talked about going back home to celebrate with his mother and you shared a memory you have with his mom, subtly letting people know that you met his family before. You asked him about his next album, which he coyly dodged since he still hasn’t shared anything about it. You called him on that, making him laugh.

After the interview segment and another commercial break, you and Harry sat across each other with a round table in between. Five couples of shot glasses on it, each filled with identical liquids, but definitely have a different taste. 

“So this game is basically, a person will pick two identical-looking drinks here and choose what to give the other. Then, we will pick a card that would have a question that we need to answer. If the other person refuses to answer, they would have to take a shot or sip of their drink. For example, this one might be a shot of vodka or vinegar.” you pointed out to some glasses. Your audience reacted enthusiastically. 

You turned to Harry, “Are you ready?”

He rubbed his hands together, “I sure am.”

“Okay, let’s start.”

You picked out the creamy white liquids you had your eyes on, putting one of the shot glasses in front of him. The band plays some thrilling music before you read the question, laughing.

“Each of the members of your group, One Direction, has released their solo music. Rank each album from–”

You didn’t even have to finish the question as Harry immediately reached for the shot glass and took a shot from it. He grimaced after putting it down, “Bloody hell! What is that?”

“The producers are saying that it’s tartar sauce.” you laughed while your audience shared their disgusted reaction. “The other one is a milkshake.”

Harry wiped his tongue and reached for the glass of water before picking your drinks. He picked the clear liquids, which you hope to be just tequila rather than vinegar.

“Okay, I like this question.” he chuckled as he read the cards. “Almost every show of your tour, you invite one of your band members on stage for a quick cameo on one of your performances. Who is your least favorite among them?”

You looked back at your band like you were really thinking about the answer. The band playfully waved at you except Yoongi who just gave you a single nod. He knew that he was probably the answer, but he didn’t really care. But you surprised him when you turned around to Harry and took a shot of what ended up to be– Thankfully, tequila. Based on your reaction, Harry immediately handed you a plate of sliced lime to mellow out the burn in your throat.

“Thank you,” you replied, making the audience laugh at your hoarse voice. After drinking some water, you spoke again, “Whoo! That was good.”

During the commercial break, Yoongi was asked to go backstage to prepare for his appearance. His more subtle and all-black outfit was changed into a more formal light brown suit from Valentino that Paul pulled for him. He was instructed on how the segment would go, but it all sounded mixed up to him with how hectic everything was. How do you even do this?

A staff member assisted him behind the curtains, “Five, four, three, two, one. Okay. Good luck, come out the curtains!”

Yoongi followed, immediately feeling the spotlight on him. His eyebrows shoot up with the unexpected reaction he got from the audience, he cannot even hear what song the band is playing. He almost froze on the spot until you showed up, smiling before pulling in for a simple cheek-to-cheek, strangely relaxing at the familiar scent of your perfume. He felt like walking on clouds as he made his way to the sofa.

“Hello, Yoongi. Glad to have you here on the show.” you began and that was the nicest thing you ever said to him, he thinks.

“Thank you, so excited to be here,” he said, trying to match the energy.

“That’s nice. So, it’s been a wild year for you, isn’t it? You mentioned before that it’s your first time going on tour. How is the experience now that you are part of the live band?”

“Uhm, it’s been pretty great. I like going around places and Fred, who’s right there, really knows a lot of places to eat to. So I’m glad I joined in.” he replied.

Without any thinking, you let your mouth speak, “And what it’s like working with me?” 

The audience laughed, thinking that you were just in character as a proud boss, but you were really curious and didn’t think about it. As soon as you realized that, you played it off, saying, “You know, working with one of the greatest popstars like me?”

He smirked, “It’s actually great too, except when you’re feeling moody. But we make a great team, I guess.”

There’s a small banter forming and the audience laughs it off, enjoying what’s happening. 

“A great team that we managed to work together for this EP alone! I really thought we would strangle each other at some point in making these songs.” you sarcastically said, making everyone laugh even Yoongi. “Moving on… Was it true that you gained almost a million followers after joining the tour?"

"Yep." Yoongi nodded. “In my first show, I got almost a hundred thousand new followers and I panicked seeing it.”

"I can imagine. I, too, will be scared if I see my notifications like that. Social media is scary.” you chuckled. “And what did your girlfriend say about it? I mean, it must have been crazy to think your partner suddenly became famous like that."

Yoongi stopped like he was trying to process your question. He thought you knew. But knowing this is national television, he has to clear up that fact for the sake of himself and his ex who is now pregnant and getting married to someone else.

"Actually, I am single, YN," he admitted, lips forming into a tight smile.

Oh. Did they break up? You wondered as you felt yourself sinking to your seat while blood came rushing to your cheeks. Okay, this is awkward. You looked at the camera, too embarrassed to look at your bass guitarist.

"Okay, you heard that, people. My bass guitarist is currently on the market!" You played it off successfully. Your audience cheered. "His personal phone number is currently posted on your screens so you can call him with your thirstiest thoughts."

You were satisfied to see a hint of panic on his usual blank face, continuing, "No, of course, I'm kidding! Just send him a text, he hates calls. Classic introvert, am I right?"

The audience and even the band laughed and you mentally pat yourself on the back for saving what could have been an awkward scenario. You went on asking him about his involvement with your EP and brought up his past collaboration with your first guest. For the first time ever, you heard him speak about his past works, mentioning how creative and kind Harry is. Then, there was a very short game.

“Okay, this is the box of questions.” you tapped your nails rhythmically to the metallic blue box you got under the table. “Our studio audience wrote out some questions for me and you.”

“Will there be punishments?” Yoongi asked.

You grinned, “No, but I can ask the producers to bring back the drinks we had earlier.”

The audience laughed. Yoongi shook his head, and you giggled, “Don’t worry, we will pick out just three easy ones.”

You were the first one to read, “Okay, for the band, what is your favorite song to perform on the tour with YN.”

The rest of the band members are in their spots with their own microphones. Noah replied with Juno, even teasing a pose, which made the audience cheer. Akio answered Bed Chem and Fred chose Greedy. Yoongi replied with Juno too.

“I think we know why,” you winked, teasing him.

Yoongi looked away and drew out a question. He smirked when he read it, “YN, who’s your favorite band member and why is it Yoongi?”

The audience screamed in delight as your eyes widened, “Does it say that? I don’t have favorites!”

Yoongi laughs as he shows you the paper, proving that he is not lying. You turned to the band, “I don’t play favorites, right? I’ve been very fair.”

Seeing your flustered reaction, the band enjoyed it and replied almost in unison that the audience laughed. “You do!”

The show ended with another performance from a song that is in Midnight Mistletoe. Harry Styles showed up once again in the end, standing next to you. The band also stood on the other side, with Yoongi being nearest to you. You began your closing remarks,

“Thank you so much to Max Rivers, the crew, and the staff of The Late, Late Show for letting me host tonight! Thank you to my special guest, Harry Styles…” you turned to him and he squeezed you in for a side hug. “And my lovely bassist, Yoongi!” he smiled. “And to my wonderful band, Akio, Fred, and Noah. Also, to my dancers. Thank you so, so much.”

“And to you guys, for watching the show, thank you so much.” you were so happy and grateful, you felt like crying. “The holidays are always about love, joy, and laughter. I hope I delivered that tonight. Happy holidays! Good night!”

Fake snow falls from above as you waved goodbye. While the credits rolled in, you were seen hugging Harry once again before moving to Yoongi, who hugged you back. It was quick but fans still managed to notice it. You moved to the band members while Yoongi and Harry were seen shaking hands and chatting before the screen dimmed down.

note | was crying because i accidentally deleted half of this drabble and can't recover it. but thankfully, still had the energy to rewrite it. thank you so much to those who sent in their questions, sorry I didn't get to put them all :(( thank u so much for reading! hope you loved it as much as I did. there will be an after-party btw ;)

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[agentravensong]

mark meta (and also a little bit of helly meta because i can't help myself) inspired by this post from @stewy referring to mark's grief as selfish (severance spoilers through s2 ep2)

outie mark says that only his grief counts, and as far as he’s concerned the matter has been dead and buried for some time now. devon saying they could get gemma back is an insult to her memory. she was a person (an extraordinary one); she was his wife; she died. that’s all there is to it. (all there can be to it, if he doesn’t want to be choking on her ghost for the rest of his life. he has to be able to exist without her.)

innie mark spends the first half of s2 ep1 saying that only his pain matters. he believes that life in hell is always better than no life at all, that there is always a life to be had, but he cannot bear hell without his team. the idea that they can just cease to be at the whims of their outies, that that's perfectly fine, is an insult to them. and so he exhumes them from their graves (and throws three other innies he didn't even attempt to get to know into the empty coffins). they’re people (not parts of people); they're his friends; they deserve to exist. that’s all there is to it. (he cannot exist without them.)

the fortunate thing for mark s. is that he doesn’t have to bear the (full) weight of the potential guilt from dragging them back into hell because the innies are then given the choice to stay or not. and he doesn't have to face irving's resulting crisis — that he in the throes of his own grief would rather not exist than continue on down here without her burt — because dylan takes care of that for him :)

the unfortunate thing is that. the one who’d probably be least happy to be stuck here for the foreseeable future (even if a part of her was hoping to see him and the others again) is the one who wasn't (and won't be) presented with that choice. whose return, when it occurs, will be purely because other people (helena and/or the board, but only after hearing and folding partway to mark's ultimatum) decided that for her. in fact, considering that her response to cobel’s threat in the s1 finale — “you’ll be long gone, but your friends will be kept alive, in pain” — was to still go through with revealing the truth…

(yes, she was okay potentially resigning her friends to an existence of suffering as well. but, even subtracting that they all understood the risk of an outcome like that going in, at least the pain they might have suffered would have been a sacrifice in service of the cause. that’s more noble. and thereby, more forgivable.) (right?)

...

looking at it this way, “no one is entitled to (this) pain but me” is the natural other side of the coin to “none may atone for my actions but me”.

[agirlwithglam]

https://www.tumblr.com/agirlwithglam/760858969670582272/no-guys-you-dont-understand-i-love-myself

How does one get here😭

this was asked a long time ago but i think i finally found the words to write it. (i don't im just bored, sorry!)

so how does one fully love themselves?

getting to that point of my life took time. it took a lot of time. like around 1-2 years of time, and im still not 100% there- i still get hurt sometimes, i'm still emotional and sensitive. but the thing is, that over these 1-2 years i've learnt so much that whenever i'm feeling sad or hurt, i'm able to support myself. i am the first person who shows up for me and does my very best to console and help me. i help myself turn that pain into something even better. i walk myself through what happened and whether i may be overreacting or not. i am the one who is now always always always there for myself.

and i think once i realised this, i genuinely was like "woah." no matter what happens in my life, i will ALWAYS have myself and that thought just soothes me. it relaxes and calms me down. i am no longer scared because there is no reason to be. i know that i cannot control other people, other people will always do what they want to do. they can hurt you, make you happy, hurt you again, even unintentionally. i cannot control their actions, but i can control myself. i can control how i choose to view it and react to it. so every time i get hurt i walk myself through the steps of seeing it a different way.

another thing i did when i was insecure & trying to love myself is that i did affirmations religiously. in the morning doing skincare, i would always repeat affirmations or listen to affirmations. it would be phrases like "i love myself." / "i am beautiful", etc. it's not the sole thing that transformed my love for myself, but it did help a ton with me believing it. (doing affirmations enough time can also help rewire your brain into believing what you keep repeating)

also, you need to realise that you do love yourself. a human's natural state of being is love. return to that state of being. a little baby or a child, they are full of love. they give love, they receive love, they are never ending of love. and they are the purest form of a person for they are themselves before society has told them who to be. so do you realise that you deserve love fully and beyond what you could imagine? and the one person in the whole world that can give you that unlimited love, is yourself. but you must choose to love yourself.

stop constantly returning to the state of insecurity okay? thats not you!! you are not insecure, you just think you are insecure! but in reality, there is NOTHING to be insecure about. someone else could have the exact same quality as you and love it so much! so end this cycle of negativity. choose to live a different, happier, more positive life. its all up to you. u can CHOOSE to be different!

finally, to end with, honey it will take time. just because you don't find yourself loving what you see in the mirror after 1 day, doesn't mean you never will. you don't have to keep changing yourself to love yourself. if your daughter looked like you, would you hate her? would you cringe when you look at her? of course not. treat yourself as your daughter. be gentle with yourself. be there for yourself. show up for yourself. it may take time, but please, don't give up on yourself.

[fuanteinasekai]

Oh, hey. Maybe this is a good time to post the thing I've been trying to write for… more than a year. It keeps getting too long because I'm basically covering the entire manga, so instead I'm just going to hit the biggest points and let you fill in the gaps yourself.

In Volume 1, Natsume meets Tanuma for the first time. Much of the story revolves around Natsume's inability to tell what is ordinary and what is yokai, a problem he refers to twice as his "unstable world." This weakness is a major running theme, and he shares it with all other powerful characters. It is likely one of the main reasons they choose to live in isolation or in the exorcist/magical world. Focusing on this in the story about meeting Tanuma may have originally been meant to highlight his fear that Tanuma wasn't real, but it's the perfect foundation for his long-term arc.

In the author's note for Taki's storehouse arc (Volume 11), Midorikawa-sensei says this:

自分はおかしいのかもしれないと思っていた田沼にとって、不安定だった世界を肯定してくれる夏目の存在は大きな救いになったのに、自分はたいして夏目の力になれないというのはもう田沼が友人として抱えていかなければならないジレンマかなという気がします。 "For Tanuma who thought there might be something wrong with him, the presence of Natsume who affirmed his world that was unstable is a great relief, but Tanuma can’t really support Natsume himself. This is a dilemma I have a feeling he must be facing by now as a friend."

This "world that was unstable" is a clear reference to Natsume's "unstable world," but cannot actually be the same so it must be a parallel. The simplest possible interpretation is that the ideal solution to Tanuma's "dilemma" would be "affirming" Natsume's "world that was unstable." That is, the ideal conclusion to Tanuma's "dilemma" arc would be to somehow help Natsume navigate the boundaries between the yokai and ordinary world. In this same story, Tanuma is able to sense the location of the demon's leg before Natsume can see it.

In Volume 12's Omibashira arc, Tanuma spends most of the story sensing yokai-related things: Sensei not being Natsume, the bottle, the presence of the monkey oni, the separation of the yokai world itself, and Omibashira. Each of these is accompanied by the same "zawa" sound effect that accompanies Natsume encountering strong yokai energy. Tanuma gets hurt because he doesn't trust his senses, and tries to confirm Omibashira visually.

In Volume 16, Tanuma reveals he always knew Ito-san was not what she claimed to be, and that he had come to believe she was "an ayakashi or something like that" once he learned they were real. The same story reveals that Natsume's presence has stabilized Tanuma and allowed him to grow stronger physically and have fewer headaches and illness. In other words, Natsume's power offsets the negative effects of Tanuma's power.

In Volume 22, Tanuma has a vision while Natsume sleeps peacefully, adding another dimension to his sensitivity. Later he tells Natsume the staircase yokai is not the one he dreamed of because its face was different and it didn't feel "malevolent." As is often the case, Tanuma was dismissive of his vision (ability) until Natsume validated him.

Later in the same volume, we finally get the origin story for the Book of Friends. This implies a major turning point in the manga as a whole.

Tenjou-san, in Volume 23, is the story of the four boys and Homura-sempai's investigation of the eponymous possibly-cursed painting. At one point, Tanuma says this:

夏目の世界はあいまいなものがいっぱいなんだな　おれは…やっぱり時々夏目と同じ世界を見てみたいなと思うけど　見えるものが違うからこそ確認しあえることもあるのかもしれないなって "Your world is full of uncertain things, huh? I… still feel like I want to see the same world as you, sometimes. But I also think sometimes it's because we see differently that we can confirm things with each other."

The context for this is not the painting, but rather Natsume's fear that Homura-sempai could be a yokai—Natsume's "unstable world." Natsume brings this up again at the end, but Tanuma's role remains unresolved. That's because this dialog was never meant to set up the end of Tenjou-san—it's meant to set up the end of his entire arc. Tanuma couldn't help yet because he doesn't accept that he can "judge the authenticity" of magical objects until By Invitation of the Queen in Volume 29. Realizing he can also sense who is human and who is yokai is yet to come. If he can tell the difference, that means his power offsets the negative effects of Natsume's power.

In Intermission Detectives, Volume 24, only Tanuma is able to ignore the unimportant and notice the significant yet tiny details. Nishimura and Kitamoto are preoccupied with the leading lady and what her beauty implies, while Natsume is too distracted by the possibility of a yokai in disguise to think about anything else, arguably too distracted to enjoy the movie. That means every Tanuma story between Tell Me Your Name and Village of the Sleeping Vessels has had a yokai in disguise—or the possibility of one—as a major plot point.

Village of the Sleeping Vessels introduces Tanuma's "light," an ability he has had few opportunities to use. The same story introduces Ban, a character who can somehow judge the authenticity of magical objects. Ban's name literally means "companion."

This is the beginning of the "female collector" storyline, which also has undertones of "growing up." Hence the combination of Reiko (Natsume's foil must grow up before him), Natsume's interest in magic (to be independent of his mentors/protectors), and Sensei's vulnerability as well as his frequent long excursions (to motivate Natsume's independence or reliability). Tanuma is central because he is meant to be Natsume's life-long partner, without whom Natsume cannot have the life he wants.

In an author's note, Midorikawa-sensei describes Tanuma as "surely able to support Natsume, but unable to come." This is a marked shift from the critical tone of most previous Tanuma notes, a shift which is maintained throughout the "female collector" stories. This is also the same "support" from Tanuma's "dilemma."

Like Intermission Detectives, By Invitation of the Queen (Volume 29) juxtaposes Tanuma's high perceptiveness with Natsume's confusion and fear of yokai in disguise. The same story is Natsume's first physical meeting with the "female collector" Shinobu. It is not a coincidence that she meets him at Tanuma's side, or that Tanuma is the "hero" of the story. His strengths will be relevant to the rest of Shinobu's storyline. Natsume is the one who realizes Tanuma has the power to sense what is real or not, and Tanuma himself is initially skeptical. However, his description of the "occult" fakes as "clean or pure" and Ban's dolls "oozing something sinister" suggests that he is sensing spiritual energy. It is also similar to how he described the yokai in the Volume 22.

Portrait of a Girl implies that Tanuma's power is significant through Matoba and Ban. Matoba's curiosity and the constant threat of meeting Tanuma builds tension, and Ban's shock at Tanuma's ability to see the light in the mirror suggests that they share the same rare ability. The ceiling yokai is able to hide from Ban by hiding from the mirror, implying Ban also shares Tanuma's weak sight. At another point, Natsume overhears an exorcist talking about his ability to use "good tools" even with fading (weak) sight. This isn't about Natsume or the regular exorcists, so it must be about Ban and his dolls, Tanuma, or both.

いつも友人の側に行きたい気持ちを抑えて蚊帳の外で待たなければならない田沼がすでに内側にいる状況 [や、一族の中で生きてきた的場さんの身内の事情や術具についてなど、] 描くことができて嬉しかったです。田沼は実際は出来ることは多いのに本人出来ることなんか大して無いと思ってしまうタイプかもしれないと感じました。 "I was happy drawing things like Tanuma, who has always had to wait outside the mosquito net, repressing the desire to go to his friend's side, but is suddenly on the inside […] I have a feeling Tanuma might be the type who thinks there's not much he can do when in reality he can do many things." (Volume 31) [n.b. the "mosquito net" idiom was used in Nitai-sama when Tanuma described being allowed to help "instead of being outside the mosquito net"]

Matoba is almost suicidally obsessed with "tools," his sister (perhaps spitefully) collects them, and Ban is a scout for magical things, so it makes sense during this storyline to focus on Tanuma's own ability to scout. However, there's little to no set-up for this ability in the manga. Even Tenjou-san, which was the perfect opportunity to hint at his ability with the painting, hinted at identifying yokai instead. The coexistence of the "pure" painting with the "pure" humans is not coincidental, but a retroactive hint to future readers that the ability to recognize what is "real" is the same whether the the "real" applies to an object or person.

So while Tanuma's ability to scout "powerful" tools may be important in the short term, it's a mere step toward his true power. The ultimate goal is to reveal that Tanuma's sensitivity to spiritual energy extends to yokai as well, and that he can tell Natsume what is yokai and what is not and even, it seems, what is malevolent and what is not. Through this, he would become irreplaceable, the only person Natsume can trust to give him peace, to affirm his unstable world, and to allow him to be as indifferent to random yokai as Shinobu.

The only thing that works against this is the inconsistency with which Tanuma appears to notice yokai. But this has been addressed through his "ability to judge authenticity." When Natsume first points out that Tanuma knew the box wasn't real, Tanuma initially dismisses his feelings as a "hunch," before going on to talk about how he never had a chance to be exposed to fakes before. He then admits that the "occult" collection felt "clean or pure," but he only noticed because he had Ban's dolls as comparison just before.

Natsume himself describes Tanuma to Natori as "cautious" and "deep thinking." In other words, he is the opposite of impulsive, only acting when he has gathered enough evidence to make a case. Tanuma would have felt things many times without reacting until he had more to go on. Fun fact: when Natsume first brings up Tanuma's power, he actually starts by talking about how he was "spinning in circles" "confusing [human matters] for ayakashi matters" unlike Tanuma who "sees people clearly." Midorikawa-sensei is a troll.

Tenjou-san (yes, again) addresses this gap from a different angle. When Natsume considers telling Nishimura and Kitamoto the truth, Tanuma suggests Natsume still needs the "space to be treated normally" "unlike me, who always worries and asks if there's something there." In other words, Tanuma feels bad about talking about yokai unnecessarily, which means he's not going to mention a feeling he doesn't think is important. This likely goes back to Volume 5, when Natsume admitted to lying about yokai and wanting to keep things "normal" between them. (The original Japanese is an incomplete sentence, but this is what he seemed to be getting at.) This is why, for example, Tanuma says he "didn't want to bother" Natsume when he wasn't sure he was possessed in Volume 8. He's not just unsure of himself—he's actively avoiding potential validation to give Natsume space. This is also probably why he gets more… excitable recently—the more Natsume talks about yokai, the less Tanuma feels the need to hide his interest.

All of this only addresses Tanuma's power and how it solves his dilemma. It is heavily implied that Tanuma's dilemma is at the heart of his sense of inadequacy and, in turn, his "characteristic sense of distance" from Natsume. This suggests that the reveal of the true extent of his power could lead to him being more open and finally closing that gap. But I'm not quite sure of this. Despite Tanuma's feeling of a "wall" between him and Natsume and being "unable to keep up," they're much closer than they used to be. This could mean that it's their closeness that will lead to revealing his power, thereby centering Natsume's emotional development rather than Tanuma's insecurity. And that matters because their emotional bond is at least as important as what their powers mean to each other.

While the hints at Tanuma's power have been comparatively subtle, his emotional support has not. Throughout the manga, Tanuma has helped guide Natsume through his anxiety and emotional trauma. He listens to him talk about his grandmother being an unwed mother with powers like him, confronts him over hiding his true needs, and sees through his lies or silence when others can't. In Volume 13, Tanuma's role in Kitamoto's story implies that he grounds Natsume and allows him to accept attachments to the town and the Fujiwaras. In the Volume 26 notes, Midorikawa even says that Natsume is able to deal with "sorting out his feelings" by spending time with Tanuma without even talking. This emotional connection is particularly evident with the Fujiwaras, whom Tanuma is invested in because of their importance to Natsume. In Volume 20, for example, his conversation with Natsume about the Fujiwaras is clearly framed as something between the two of them, that Taki can only observe.

This Fujiwara theme makes its appearance in Portrait of a Girl when Tanuma gets invested in Morio's relationship with his adoptive parents. These characters are an obvious mirror for Natsume and the Fujiiwaras. At the end of the story, it is also Tanuma who resolves Natsume's feelings of anxiety about why Morio sold off all of his parents' belongings. I had previously thought of Tanuma's emotional support as a kind of parallel to his power, but the mingling of the above with Tanuma's increasing involvement with the exorcist/magic world changed my mind.

Tanuma's emotional support relies on his empathy, understanding of people, and ability to see what others don't. It's not one single thing. When Natsume talks about Tanuma's ability to "see people" he also brings up his "night vision" which is a completely separate ability from all of the above. There is overlap in the abilities he uses to help Natsume with the ordinary world (e.g. Fujiwaras) and the abilities he uses to understand what is yokai and what is ordinary. This is why By Invitation of the Queen is simultaneously about Tanuma's ability to see through people and his ability to sense the "purity" of the box. Tanuma's extraordinary perceptiveness is an entire collection of talents, all of which he can use to see what Natsume can't, to give Natsume inner peace, to allow him to live in the moment instead of constantly looking over his shoulder. But only if he's there—just as Natsume can only offset Tanuma's sensitivity if he's present.

If Natsume is allowed to support Tanuma in the same (or similar) ways, and if Tanuma realizes how powerful he truly is and Natsume allows him to help, then their relationship will be truly balanced. They will be able to support each other in all ways, in all worlds, without worrying about being too much or too little.

This is what makes Tanuma the Sasame to Natsume's Misuzu—without whom Natsume cannot be "fulfilled" even when "surrounded by liveliness." It's what makes him the light in the dark forest, Natsume's guide through the fog that all with sight suffer. Tanuma may need Natsume to live, but Natsume needs Tanuma to live.

[stygiansun-totaleclipse]

FEN! I cannot believe how long I sat on your masterwork! I finally had the opportunity to sit down and read it and I was completely blown away! 🤯❤️ Your writing is excellent. The way you began the story with that achingly beautiful scene with your eldest sibling? So well done! And the banter between your retainer and the priestess had me in stitches. Your characters are so unique and intriguing, and the pacing is just right. I cannot wait to see what’s in store next!

Thank you!! ❤️❤️ I rewrote the beginning like a dozen times lol trying to figure out how to open the story before I settled on that scene, so I’m glad it seemed to open as a good hook ❤️ :D

As for what I got in store, I got big plans 👌(this is a threat)

Also congrats on releasing cantata! (you work so fast??!!?!!!??!?) I still have to finish reading it but so far it’s lovely! 💕

[just-dreaming-marvel]

A Terrible Accident ~ Part 3

A TERRIBLE ACCIDENT MASTERLIST

< previous part

Summary: The Team works on a plan to help you and Bucky.

Word Count: 1,875ish

Warnings: talk of rape, abuse, trauma

Notes: Been awhile for this update... sorry about that... read with caution...

Bucky wouldn’t allow any of the Wakandans inside his cell, including Shuri. Luckily, Shuri had the technology to be able to still run the needed tests. It took her a few hours to finish running what she needed to before gathering the team into one of the conference rooms. Shuri didn’t put any of the information she gathered on the screens yet. Not wanting any of the team members to read ahead.

“What have you found, Shuri?” Steve asked, unable to wait any longer. He was worried for his best friend.

“As I feared, something has happened to the rewiring that we had done to Barnes and the Winter Soldier was able to return,” she admitted. Steve’s face dropped while the other team members tried to keep their composure. “My team and I are coming up with a plan. We think that we can do the same protocol—“

“The protocol that didn’t work?” Tony questioned with a scoff.

“There are tweaks that can be made. I was hoping to have your help, Stark, as well as Dr. Banner’s.”

“How will you do the protocol when Barnes won’t allow anyone in the cell with him?” Asked Sam.

“With the previous protocol, we put him in cryo until I could—“

“No. No,” Steve interrupted. “Bucky cannot go under again.”

“Let Shuri finish, Steve,” Nat said.

“As I was saying,” Shuri continued, “we put Barnes in cryo and then woke him up to do the protocol. With his resistance to even having people in the same room as him, I believe we need to have him under the whole time and wake him only to test it.”

“He won’t agree to this,” said Sam. “Not at all.”

“He’ll do it for Y/N,” Steve defended. “He’ll do anything for Y/N.”

“He believes that shutting himself away is for Y/N’s sake,” Wanda said. “I don’t know if he will believe that this will actually work after this.”

“Y/N can convince him.”

“Y/N’s not allowed to go anywhere near Barnes,” Tony said. “As per his orders and mine. It’s for the best.”

“She may be the only one able to help Bucky.”

“She’s also seriously injured in the med bay thanks to your friend.”

“He wasn’t—“

“It’s Barnes’ prints and sperm that were found all over her! It was him! I don’t care that you believe him to have two separate personalities, it was still him! He is not going near her and vice versa. End of discussion.”

~~~

You knew that the Team had been pulled into a meeting. This was your chance to sneak away and see Bucky. You knew that Tony would be incredibly pissed at you, but you needed to see Bucky. It was harder to get down to the detention cells than you had originally thought, all due to your injuries. 

Walking as quickly as you could, which wasn’t very fast at all, you searched for the cell that Bucky was in. It broke your heart when you found him in the farthest cell away from the elevator and stairwell. Holding your breathe, you took the final step needed to stand in front of the one-way glass. 

Bucky looked awful. He was in the corner on the floor. His hair was hanging over his face, but failing to hide the dark circles under his sad eyes. Clearly, he hadn’t changed and your blood was still splattered over him. The only thing missing was his metal arm. You ran your eyes over the room to see that his arm had been tossed across the room. It broke your heart to see him like this, yet… there was a tiny voice inside your head telling you to run away. You hate that the Winter Soldier had made you scared of the man you loved. You knew that they were different, but ran now your head was beginning to trick you into thinking otherwise.

With a shaky hand, you went to press the button that would allow you to speak to him. Before you could press the button, you were stopped.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Tony’s harsh voice made your head snap in his direction. He was bounding down the hall, with Steve, Natasha, and Sam behind him.

“I need to speak with him,” you responded, getting emotional. You backed up against the console, unknowingly pressing the button that would allow Bucky to hear what was going on. “He has to know that it’s not his fault. I have to tell him that it’s not his fault… I have to…” Tears were streaming down your face and you had begun trembling. “I have to make this right… I have to help him… I—“

“Shhh, it’s okay,” Natasha cooed, stepping past Tony to get to you. 

“No! It’s not okay!” You tried to lean away from Natasha’s caring hands. “It’s never going to be okay! I—I have to tell him that it’s not his fault! I have to convince him of that to help me believe it!”

Stunned silence echoed through the hall. The realization of what you had said—what you had admitted—hit you like a freight train.

“Oh my…” You suddenly broke down in tears and collapsed on the floor. “I didn’t mean that!” You cried. “I didn’t mean that!” Natasha followed you and pulled you into her. “I love him! I do!”

“We know, sweetie,” Natasha said as she tried her best to calm you.

“I know it was the Soldier,” you sobbed. “I know it wasn’t Bucky… He would never hurt me like this. But… But…”

Natasha glanced up at the men who were staring at the scene with sad, desperate looks. She turned her focus back to you. “Let’s go back to bed, Y/N. You need more rest.”

You didn’t have the energy to argue with Natasha. You let her help you to your feet and guide you out of there. Tony, Steve, and Sam were frozen in their spots for a moment trying to process what you had said. 

“Shit,” Sam muttered. He quickly went over and pressed the button that turned off the sound for Bucky.

Steve’s eyes widened and he rushed over to the window to check on his friend. Bucky was standing in the center of the room, head down. The men could see the tears trailing down his face and falling onto the floor.

“How do we fix this?” Steve whispered, eyes never leaving his friend.

“I don’t know if there’s a way, Cap,” Sam admitted. 

~~~

Staring at the ceiling became your new thing to do. Members of the Team kept coming up to talk to you, but everything they were saying was fuzzy. You kept replaying the last few days in your head. Every action. Every word. The shift between Bucky and The Winter Soldier. The fact that you had admitted that you were scared. 

“She needs help,” Sam whispered, watching you from outside your room. “Professional help.”

“They both do,” Natasha replied. “Hell, all of us do.”

“Shuri’s planning on forcing Bucky into cryo. I absolutely hate it, but there’s no other way.”

“We have to trust that she knows what she’s doing. She’s the only one who has a chance of ridding him of the Winter Soldier programing permanently.”

“Maybe we take them both to Wakanda. They have technology there that could help both of them in a way none of us are able. Shuri’s probably alright thinking about taking Bucky there anyway.”

“It’s not a terrible idea, though I don’t know how Tony would feel about taking Y/N away from here. You know she’s basically his sister.”

“He needs help, too. He hasn’t fully healed from the fact that The Winter Soldier killed his parents and then this happens… Tony may never let Bucky in the compound again, let alone near Y/N.”

“This is an impossible situation.”

~~~

The team had been called by Shuri into a meeting. Everyone was sitting around the room, the tension thick.

“I’ve placed Sargent Barnes in cryo,” Shuri informed. “I will be moving him to Wakanda for further treatment.”

Steve stood next to Shuri. “I’m going with them and will be supervising everything,” he explained. “I will still be on duty and will do what is necessary from Wakanda, but I need to be there for Bucky.”

“Natasha and I were talking,” Sam spoke up, “and we think that maybe Y/N should go to Wakanda as well.”

“Absolutely not!” Tony immediately argued. “She will never go near Barnes again. Understood? You heard her, she openly admitted to being scared of him.”

“They wouldn’t need to talk. Wakanda just has better resources—“

“That we can bring here if needs be! I’ve already contacted the best therapists that money can buy and are moving them to the compound for the time being. She needs to be home to heal and away from that monster.”

“It’s not a monster, Tony!” Steve shouted. “He’s my friend! He is all of ours friend!”

“Not anymore he’s not. Who ever wants to go with them can go, but Y/N will remain at the compound. End of discussion.”

~~~

Steve sighed as sat on your bed. You were still awake, but staring at the ceiling like you had been since you came back into this room. It was dark outside and the only light coming into the room was from the hallway.

“Bucky and I are leaving in the morning,” Steve whispered, unsure if you could even comprehend his words. “Sam’s going to join us in a few days. He wants to make sure you’re alright. Wanda and Vision said they’ll come, too. We might be able to use their powers to help Bucky finally be free of the programing, so that’s hopeful.” He stared at you for a silent moment. “I’m so sorry about everything, Y/N/N…” Tears collected in his eyes. “I wish that I could fix this more… I know that the two of you love each other. And I have to hope everything will work out. It will.” He stood up and leaned over you. He pressed a tender kiss to your forehead. “I’ll keep you in the loop, no matter what Tony does, I promise.”

Steve turned away and almost missed your quiet, “don’t.”

He spun back around and hurried back to your side. “What?”

“Don’t keep me updated… please,” you rasped, growing emotional. Steve thought his heart couldn’t break any further. “I… I need time… and I… I don’t want the pressure… I’m sorry, Steve.”

“No, no, no, no,” he shook his head. “Please don’t apologize to me. If that’s what you want, then I will respect that.”

“I’m so sorry.” Tears slipped down your cheeks.

“Don’t be. I will be calling to check on you though, okay? Can’t let you think I forgot about you.”

“Okay.”

“You’ll get through this, Y/N, no matter what. And don’t let Tony force you into doing anything you don’t agree with. Alright?”

“Okay.”

“Please let the know if you need anything.”

“Okay.”

Steve gave your forehead a kiss before he got up and left. You went back to staring at the ceiling, letting yourself drown in the weight of it all.

next part >

[galaxygirl-katie27]

Durbe Redesign

(It’s been some time, but it’s here!

More notes under the cut!)

-Ok, first of the issue of nationality. I was going crazyyy trying to figure out WHY the ruins of a mid-evil European knight would be in Brazil. But then I saw this one post suggesting, that he may have been a Spanish knight, who had been accompanying a royal figure when the Spanish went to South America. That made enough sense for me, so now that’s just canon. The time periods is where I draw the line, this is good enough for me.

-So, Durbe is Spanish and I love Latino Durbe more than I thought I would. He also definitely calls Ryouga Spanish pet names.

-Next up, he is bisexual and I will DIE on that hill. You can pull that headcanon from my cold dead hands. He is so fucking bi for Nasch and Merag, you cannot convince me otherwise.

-Ok, let‘s do past life first. Since I now headcanon him as Spanish, I gave him accurate traditional Spanish knight armour. And long wavy hair. Because what screams more „Spanish knight“ than long wavy hair- AND A BEARD. I love Durbe with a beard, I wanna draw that more. (Though I think in the present Durbe would shave more, which makes Ryouga sad, cause he liked the beard)

-Also he would have always been squinting, because this man is BLIND without glasses. But they weren’t even invented in his time, so he just had to suffer. He is so damn nearsighted, he can only see what’s right in front of him. But therefore he honed all his other senses, being able to sense where his opponent is by merely hearing and even smelling sometimes. I imagine he would have been badly bullied for his bad eyesight and his goal of becoming a knight, but he just trained hard to prove them all wrong and became the best knight in the entire kingdom.

-He had always been perceived as intimidating, his squinting being mistaken as glaring, but he is actually the nicest person you will ever meet. Except if you‘re his enemy. Then he will beat the living shit out of you.

-Him and Nasch also absolutely were secret lovers. Or they thought they were secret, but like the whole castle knew. I believe their first meeting would have been like this: Durbe travelled on Mach to Nasch‘s kingdom, when they were younger and Nasch‘s father was king, because he had to deliver a message from his king. But he got caught in a storm and was found by Nasch and castle guards. So now he had to stay and recover and that was when he got to know the twins and even offered them sword training, cause he is a MASTER at sword fighting. Eventually he and Nasch fell in love and Durbe travelled over as often as possible to see him (which honestly was sadly not that often, cause of the distance and his duties to his king)

-The end of his story remains the same, only that, after hearing of his death, Nasch was so depressed from the war that he threw himself off a tower into the ocean.

-Now then, present time. Durbe absolutely gives off history major vibes. So that‘s what I did, because of course he will study in history major, specialising in his and the timelines of his fellow emperors, to ensure that nothing wrong is being passed on.

-He also is still a horse boy. He wears his riding pants and boots to go and ride horses almost every day. Ryouga and Rio will sometimes join him, because they still know how to ride horses. So yes to Tomoshipping Horse riding date. Also Mach is alive and happily living on a horse farm where Durbe visits him, because I said so.

-Also HE FINALLY GOT HIS GLASSES. He was flashed, when it was revealed that Ryouga and Merag are Nasch and Merag and he now ACTUALLY saw what they look like with glasses. Because of course he already thought they were beautiful, but now he sees them in like 4K. He had never believed that they could be even more attractive than they already were to him (when they were just undefined blobs)

-He is still practicing sword fighting as a hobby, because he just can’t shake of the instinct of protecting his loved ones with his life. He always wants to be ready to defend his friends and family.

-He also wears the friendship same bracelet with Rio and Ryouga and a promise ring from Ryouga, like the matching rings Ryouga has with Rio.

[xaeyrnofnbe]

idw publishing angel and spike comics

didn't like them. the women were sexualized and objectified to a degree that made it impossible to get immersed in the story, and it was a painfully consistent issue. i genuinely cannot fucking believe this is meant to take place in the same universe as girl power, the tv show.

and the stories were so heavy and serious all the time with no (good) breaks that it was also just really hard to get invested in. angel can only fuck up so many times before it gets redundant, y'know? and this takes place BEFORE the twilight thing.

almost every character was unbearable in their melodrama the entire way through.

THERE WERE A COUPLE THINGS I LIKED THOUGH!!

weirdly enough, i actually really enjoyed the groosalugg during his appearances. he was one of the few characters that never pissed me off. his banter and dragon were a guiding light in the irritating darkness that was these comics.

i also really liked betta george! weird character for sure, but honestly really entertaining! i've been doodling him in my sketchbook that's how much i liked him. i'd kinda like to see him in more stuff tbh, he was a delight. might reference him in my fics, who knows

and finally, the short story Boys And Their Toys was funny as fuck and i loved it so. being a spangel shipper has never felt so conflicting. on the one hand, a character said spike thinks of angel like a big brother. gross! yuck! but on the other, there is. technically. TECHNICALLY. a scene with them kissing. however: angel was nicholas cage and spike was a woman. and it was terrible. so all together i'd say it's net zero spangel content but teases the idea just enough to keep me satiated. also spike-as-angel had me laughing at every fucking scene with him in it, but like. it also provided some really interesting insight on how spike actually views angel? idk. i thought it was neat.

as far as buffy comics go, so far i have read:

buffy season 8 (a wild ride from start to finish, everyone was out of character, i still have no clue how anyone came up with ANY of that. i've kind come to terms with it though. funny as hell in hindsight.) (bonus points for the spangel crumbs littered here and there. points withdrawn for buffy's reaction to them.) (season 8 is bonkers bananas all the way through, you have GOT to read it if you haven't. hell of an experience.)

buffy season 9 (a lil rough around the edges but the plot was much more casually engaging, buffy and spike had some very cute moments in the first half and overall i just like what the comics do with spike's character, even if it's a little inconsistent. oh and the plot twists were very silly and fun) (spoilers: the resolution was a little weird but i found it much funnier than i probably should have when illyria sacrificed herself. guy trying to destroy the world bc his girlfriend died and illyria was just like. hey i knew a guy who's girlfriend died one time. how'd he live with it? no yeah he didn't. he died. sorry.)

angel & faith season 9 (loved the callbacks to prior stories, though the stuff with whistler was kinda lost on me. pearl and nash were ok. i liked seeing drusilla again! though i'd prefer to see more of who she is now. the plot involving angel's nipple piercing struck me dead on the spot, weirdest part of the whole thing.)

spike: a dark place (extremely silly, spike leading spaceship full of giant cockroaches was not something i knew i needed but they were so so entertaining. generally just so amusing. i'm totally incorporating an appreciation for space into his character when i write him now.)

spike: into the light (PEAK comic!spike. thank you james marsters. easily the lowest-stakes, most grounded of anything i've read so far, which was extremely refreshing. this guy gets dragged through the dirt the whole time and still manages to be hilarious and endearing throughout. loved him narrowly hiding his vampirism at every turn from dylan. my favorite detail was the constant flapping of the bottom of his shoe.)

buffy season 10 (currently a little ways through, EXTREMELY promising so far. total vibe shift from seasons 8 and 9, way more in line with the feel of the show. every scene with buffy and spike has me kicking my legs and twirling my hair. love those two. dunno how to feel about giles yet. i am ECSTATIC at the notion of xander finally getting some character development, but i'll hold back on celebrating until i get firm confirmation.)

angel & faith season 10 (reading at the same time as buffy s10, the different art styles are a bit jarring to bounce between. genuinely the art in this one is making it way harder to connect with. i LOVED the style in s9, so the shift to realism has been disappointing to say the least. genuinely i just Do Not Know how to feel about this season yet.) (also separating your 2 main leads when their dynamic was the central focus of the last season is certainly A Writing Choice.)

[chaoticmvse]

where should you go when your own four walls feel like a prison?

Locked up where you should feel at home. In the USA, more than 10 million people are abused in their own homes every year. And my team and I want to offer these people a refuge, a place where they are understood and supported. A place of well-being, of arrival; a safe haven - and that's exactly where the name comes from. So follow me around as I give you the first glimpse of the residential complex that has been disrupted so that people can feel safe again.

I really wanted to create something good from my own trauma, something better - to give people what I had been missing all this time. It's incredibly difficult to get out of a violent household and/or relationship, because there's usually no real place to escape to. But with Safe Haven, that's history: with the help of four building complexes connected by a spacious inner courtyard, people are given the opportunity to live a quiet, communal life. Passionate therapists and psychiatrists are available at all times and there is a timed program to lead a routine life or to be reintegrated into it. Everyone is welcome here - except those who advocate violence. I can't wait to see where this journey together takes us and I am beyond proud to say that we will officially welcome our first lost souls in early August.

So if you’ll ever need help or know someone who needs to escape, let me know. I will help you to get out.

⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ xoxo, jocelyn.

[ewwww-what]

When are the cignifiant figure’s releasing their album made specifically to bully Ruben Hopclap?