#I actually use the albums a lot
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My kpop trash bin life journey
I am not lying to anyone, there was a big period of my life where I was deep into kpop. I would even call it unhealthy, but I want to share it. Though, in all honesty I hope no one was like me.
My journey started all the way back to 2011, my very first kpop group was big bang. My mother was actually the one who introduced it to me saying that I should listen to kpop. I think she just wanted to talk about it with someone though… Anyway, the first kpop song for me was Haru Haru by Big Bang. That pineapple lives in my memory very vividly to this day.
Since my first song was from Big Bang you would think they would be my first group, right? Wrong, I was so over my head for Girl’s Day, Apink, Girl’s Generation, and Cnblue. It became around this time that I started to get more interested in Korean variety shows as well as the culture in general. I started watching shows like Running Man, Infinity Challenge, We Got Married, and so on. I would say I was pretty healthy during this time too; I didn’t obsess over any of these idols either. I’m pretty sure I followed other groups I can’t remember right now too.
Another 2 years go by and now it’s 2013, my mom discovers BTS, she falls in love, but so do I. I find them to be pretty interesting. Still, I prefer the groups I had previously mentioned a little bit more. I started to become interested in Exo and I rekindled that Big Bang flame too. Then flash forward to 2015, the start of my madness.
In 2015, I would fall in love with Seventeen, Twice, and the SM Rookies (NCT before they became NCT). This was when I learned more about fan culture among the kpop community. Before this year, I never thought I would want to order any albums because it just wasn’t a thing back then for people living overseas. What I mean by that, was how it wasn’t as easily accessible as it is now. Despite wanting albums, I was doing alright, or so I thought.
2016 came rolling in and I felt the need to support every group I followed, and I will list them all out for you below:
Twice Exo BTS NCT Apink Girl’s Day CNblue Day6 Astro Seventeen BtoB KNK Victon SF9 Sistar
I’m not lying I felt like I needed to support everyone, and I did very successfully just that. I wrote down when each of their comebacks would come out, I followed their socials and so on. If there was anything any of these idols had been you bet, I was going to be watching them. Now, if you’re wondering about my life, don’t worry. At this point I was in school, and I never slacked when it came to grades. So, no one in my family said anything.
I lived this life all the way up till 2018, which is not healthy. I love kpop, but by the middle of 2017 I felt like I needed to support them. BTW I had added more groups to this list as well. Going back to the feeling of needing to support them, it was unhealthy. I was obsessed, I was a dumpster of kpop and nothing more. I didn't think that way though. I was like, I’m so happy I know so much about kpop. I know everything that’s going on at the moment in the kpop world.
Of course, my health wasn’t that way. I spent several hours watching kpop, even if there weren’t any subtitles. I even bought products they endorsed. I even went to kcon which wasn’t all that exciting as I expected it to be. The only thing I don’t regret was the concerts. I felt that if I didn’t support them in this way, I didn’t have the worthiness to call myself a fan. Which is not true in any way. Now what was so wrong with this life? Well, I didn’t pay attention to myself. I realized my whole personality and life was centered around kpop and not who I was as a person. Let that sink in for a moment.
I had to take one good look in the mirror and see who I was. I was someone who knew more about kpop than their own self. Now, I’m not blaming kpop, I have only myself to blame. I should have paid more attention to myself. I know that now and I don’t get carried away like I used to. Now, I dress up, go out and I know who I am. It took me two years of limiting my kpop intake. Man, I sound like I had an addiction.
So where am I now?
I watch kpop, but I’m nowhere near as invested as I was back then. I still have my groups like Astro, Twice, and SF9, but I’m satisfied. I don’t feel the need to watch everything they do, nor do I feel the need to do anything I was like before. I think those three groups are the only ones I constantly check up on.
What I’m trying to say is don’t make the same mistake I did. Don’t feel like you need to watch everything your fave is in. Also, I used to be one of those people who wouldn’t listen to mainstream pop because I was like “ew gross” which is totally not true. I see some people like that these days and I think you need to understand everyone has their own music tastes.
In the end, you don’t breathe and live for your idol. Don’t spend hours upon hours watching content on kpop. Take a look at yourself and see who you know more about, a kpop idol or yourself. If kpop is the one thing that makes you happy, please find something else. I trust you that it’s going to make your life a lot better. Well, that’s all I have to say and I hope those of you who made it this far found this interesting to gaze upon.
#kpop#I was a mess#twice#seventeen#bts#sf9#astro#my journey#nct#apink#I miss old kpop music#is it just me who had this experience#I low-key hope so#I have a lot of kpop merch now#I don't even use them though#that's a lie#I actually use the albums a lot#y'know to listen to music
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mix: firstprince (taylor's version)
#rwrbedit#alex x henry#alex claremont diaz#henry fox#my reward for not putting any tswift songs on my other mix is that i decided to do one that is just. nothing but tswift songs.#so. firstprince mix (taylor's version)#i was gonna do 'say don't go' for kensington but.#i actually liked 'haunted' a lot more for it#and nearly did 'haunted' for the scene of alex and nora but they swapped#(dress was entirely self-indulgent btw but. i couldn't resist.)#i have zero apologies for the choice of 'paper rings' btw#not pictured: me tapping my foot and waiting impatiently for rep tv#(listen my life will not be complete until i hear 'don't blame me (taylor's version)')#i'm choosing to blame this on my best friend#bc i went 'since i didn't put any on the other mix tell me i can't make one that's just tswift songs'#and she went 'do it.'#and i said 'okay at least tell me i can't just name it 'firstprince (taylor's version)'' and she said 'okay but you should'#so here we are.#also i think my favorite coloring in this is the one i used for 'wildest dreams' and 'you are in love' and 'say don't go'#yes i did attempt to color them in ways reminiscent of the albums and what about it
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what's a lesser known spider-man related thing that you don't see enough people talk about? (for me although its not lesser known, more like forgotten, only two people (you included) have recongnized my pfp)
weird al yankovic song
youtube
#sci speaks#weird al.. without a doubt arguably the most popular accordion player in an incredibly specific genre of music.#i really could have mentioned a whole number of things but i think i've mentioned the “rock reflections of a superhero” album like 100 time#if you haven't checked out the rock reflections of a superhero album. boy you better. it's on spotify.#okay it's mostly music.#other things: that fan script for tasm3. i think about it all the time.#and i love baman piderman. yes.#i honestly think baman piderman did become a minor bit of inspiration for peter b parker's movements in itsv.#i mean it. i smelt a lot of parallels. i kept thinking of piderman when i saw peter b using his webs.#and it checks out. piderman was the cringefail spider-man before ANYBODY. itsv copied his swagger.#i bet you one of the animators on spiderverse will come clean. one day.#also. the animators on baman piderman are ludicriously talented. i used to go to their streams. fucking insane what they do.#actually a little treasure of a series if you guys haven't checked it out.#it's sad it fell out of people's peripheries. it's very charming nonsense. and a lot of love went into it.#i was in love with baman piderman. long before i even cared about spider-man. there. that's the truth.#i cared about piderman FIRST!
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tranquility base hotel + casino concept ads because i love this album more than anything and i have an incurable urge to create:
inspired by!!: x - x - x
#gotta love that undercurrent of unease#and ofcourse a million lyric references#i never took graphic design in school. so please be nice 😭#ITS NOT EVEN MY FAVOURITE AM ALBUM IT JUST- UGHHGGGGGG#its got such a grip on my soul its actually insane#also love how literally NONE of these would make sense to anyone outside of a very niche market audience-#am. thankyou for blessing us with this album.#and thankyou to anyone else whos ever made anything based on tbh+c because you lot literally fuel my soul#tbh+c#tbhc#tranquility base hotel and casino#alex turner#arctic monkeys#am6#my posts!!
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got to see the @narcissistcookbook in dallas, thoroughly enjoyed it
#i draw#the narcissist cookbook#really fun show Overall!!#like the ideal narcissist cookbook setlist. a bunch of my favs. so cool#i really wanted to figure out how to get a lyric quote to look alright with this composition and i COULDNT do it#it woulve been 'as the heavens beneath us convulse and contract to be near us' if i couldve made it work. fav lyric#side note on the piece: i didnt MEAN to make it the pansexual flag. i do this a lot. pink yellow and blue just look so good together whoops#i am not pan just a real big fan of their flag Apparently#inspired by 2 album covers! eden disorder and conditional love#i wouldve made a physical piece or doodle to give @ the merch table but i only knew i was GOING to the show about 24 hours before it#i was the guy who got to come because my friend broke up with his gf lol. got slid into the schedule very last minute#this is the first concert ive actually gotten to say hi to the band(s) at! really glad i got to come! not glad about WHY but yknow#silver linings
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thinking about love in danger days
this is part of my conspiracy theory that that album is aroallo, but i've always gotten the sense that romance and romantic attatchment is much less important to danger days than any other mcr record. with bullets&revenge it's quite obvious as the demolition lovers take up like, everything, and the black parade has a heavy focus on a romantic relationship as well.
while i do think there are lines in it that are romantically coded, there is a definitive lack of emphasis on it- like it's nowhere in the plot at all.
i do think danger days represents a very familial type of love though. while other albums visit a sense of "i want you, i need you, i miss you, i hate you,", this is more like…"i love you, i want to protect you, i'm sorry"
i find this especially strongly in s/c/a/r/e/c/r/o/w:
"Nevermind about the shape i'm in, I'll keep you safe tonight"
"love, love, love won't stop this bomb"
"run, run, bunny, run"
and other songs:
"i'll find you when the sun goes black"
"just save yourself and i'll hold them back tonight"
"how long until we find our way in the dark and out of harm"
relevant things i can't cover with just quotes are planetary go, oft-theorized to be about party poison and kobra kid, as brothers, leaving battery city together; sing, about the killjoys' last message to the girl while saving her; goodnite dr. death, phrased as him saying goodnight to children; and summertime, which i can't discern the meaning of but seems more like a family type of love.
i think it makes sense that danger days is like this, seeing as it features main characters that take care of a child main character as opposed to main characters that love other main characters of the same age/ability.
another thing i noticed while re-listening to the more sentimental songs for this essay is that there's just a distinctly different vibe to it. So much of it is focused around wanting to protect people, keep them safe and out of danger (<- ha that's the name of the album) and loved. i think this also makes sense, because the killjoys live a very, well, dangerous life without much security, and they'd want to provide what they lack the most. another semi-related thing i noticed is just how much of an emphasis there is on childhood in this album. i feel like there's a vibe of youth or teen-hood throughout the earlier ones, but this is just VERY strongly about kids. again this makes sense cause not only are the killjoys teenagers (a type of kid!) they also have a proper little kid to watch.
also, i wonder how much of this stuff was due to gerard becoming a parent. just something to think about
#mcr#my chemical romance#danger days#ddttlotfk#danger days: the true lives of the fabulous killjoys#barely on topic but i hate how everyone always brings up the different greek words for love whenever they talk about different kinds of lov#I DONT CARE ABOUT EROS AND PHILIOS OR WHATEVER!! its actually okay to use adjectives to describe nouns. its okay. you dont need to use more#at any rate im not USING the damn greek love paradigm i see no reason to be chained to its definitions#ppl will be like errhmmm (nerd emoji) (pointing emoji) did you know that the greeks actually had different words for brotherly godly and ro#erhm yes i did know that.#sometimes i feel like danger days feels more energetic and youthful. less serious than the more emo other albums even though i acknowledge#but in some ways i also think it's a lot more mature#like the black parade is a serious mature story but it feels very young adult/teenager vibes. danger days is so strange because it feels si#i guess that makes sense cause the killjoys are teenagers (apparently) but also sort of parents of the girl#i think they have similar conclusions of acceptance and letting go#they just feel so distinctly different#i feel like this is kinda incoherent but i dont care about the thesis enough to edit it#okay since i wrote that tag i have since edited this the autism won#i have to resist the urge to say “stick that in your skillet and let it simmer” (the thing that stoner otter says in acnh) every time i say#i was writing in my notebook earlier and dropped a metaphorical bomb about the black parade and then i feel like i didnt have anything to s#it was so hard not to write that there😭😭
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#look who has no self control and drew this albino shithead again#elric of melnibone#Elric of Melniboné#what can i say i love him#I drew this a while ago and figure I should just post :T#this wonderful outfit is inspired by micheal whelan's art for The Bane of The Black Sword#I actually found out about the Elric series when I discovered the band Cirith Ungol#They use the same art for their album King Of The Dead#I highly encourage all elric fans to check out this band#they're literally the biggest elric fanboys out there#he's literally on all of their album covers and most of their songs feature him#of their latest album 'sailor on the seas of fate' is a personal favorite song#anyways i rambled a lot haha
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...am I just losing my mind or did yer icon become evil? I don't remember that BeAst behind Boe
yuuuump always been behind me
#ask#anon#pazuzu's just been there since the beginning#mainly because my avatar use to be of 2D in front of the d-sides album cover. or atleast one of the covers#and i had a lot of transparent edits of 2D over that cover#but when i had Boe made. i put him over it instead and i just kinda kept it like that cause i thought the colours together were really nice#as for the blurry swirls. i just like doing simple effects in paintdotnet#i don't really imagine them as much besides the blurriness of the minds eye. like this is how you'd see the inside of my brain maybe.#or not really my brain. boes minds eye maybe.#i don't know if i have a ''lore explanation'' for pazuzu in Boe's life in limbo/hell#or specifically in relation to Boe i mean#i'd still like to actually visualize what limbo looks like. or specifically the area in limbo in which Boe lives#which is just an old manor in the middle of nowhere. with old computer crts and keyboards in the mud of his back yard#dark purplish skies with maybe blueish roaming fields with no horizon#i do have a map file of me trying to create what i imagine to be Boes house but i've only blocked out his porch#i've got a loose idea of what the layout of his house's interior is like but nothing solid honestly#the reason he lives in an old manor is due to mystery case files: ravenhearst. inspiration-wise#use to play that growing up from bigfishgames. fucking love the look of that manor and the intense mess that resides within#i think i also think about the Gorillaz' o green world phase where they had kong studio's absolutely trashed with junk and shit#did actually buy MCF Ravenhearst the other day actually. specifically for higher res ref images of rooms#played a little of it the other day but i was so tired for most of that day so i didnt play for long#anyway. thank you for the ask anon :) yeah he's always been there. pazuzu kinda just blends into the background i think
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☠️🥀
#art#I just wanted to see if there was a recording function on my laptop and there is! It looks interesting so I thought I'd share#Imagine the first protomen album playing in the background - It's what I was listening to actually while painting haha#The colors look terrible on mobile... I don't want to deal with that 😭 it's more vibrant on my computer#Anyways the recorder only recorded the main photoshop window.#it’s strange not to see my screen not half covered by references along with the layers/history haha When I stream on discord it does it too#I was getting really annoyed and bored with the rendering process I had grown accustomed too#Lazy sketches and thousands of transparent brushstrokes of layers were getting to me - almost a watercolor technique?#Been messing around a lot and this painting method is quite fun actually - I think that's what is most important - the results be damned#I had stopped touching the liquify and smudge tool for a really long time and I've been using it for this#So yes I've been enjoying myself and to change the current more I've been doing a lot developed sketches too#also....Sometimes I doodle chibi VHD while in class...would anyone actually be interested if I post them on here? ♡(๑´• .̫ •ू`๑)
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surprise art attack!!! here’s @deityofhearts ‘s cashmere, everyone’s favorite whimsical tiefling
#pose taken directly from the kikuomiku4 album cover bc i’ve been listening to UFO on repeat for idk how many days now#finally gave me the inspiration i needed to do something like this it’s like both sad and super whimsical#actually tbh it gives me more wishful vibes now that i think about it but 1. idk what wishful looks like and 2. cashmere design my beloved#kikuo just in general has a lot of whimsysad and/or fundark which is why i love him#tbh ufo has quickly shot up to one of my fave songs it’s the iconic accordion and the tempo being unstable in places#uh anyway ignore me being a kikuo nerd again#wahhh this was fun to work on it has consumed me these past three days#jumping up and down hehehehehe#glad i finally cut to the ‘it’s done *collapses*’ stage of the arting process bc i’ve been having trouble finishing pieces lately#man i WISH i could come up with poses this good on my own. idc i’m still proud of this#my art#ok yeah i just got the time total. 12 hours#i knew it would be a long time but i didn’t think that long#tbh a lot of that was spent inefficiently bc i kept having to resize the image up when i realized the pixels were too crunchy#and when you make an image bigger the lines get blurry so then you have to redo them. yeah i had to do that TWICE. like a dummy.#12 hours used to be like par for the course for me but i’ve finally gotten faster. or maybe i’ve just stopped doing as many full figures#lol
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\(_ _)
#im so upset ok literally no one cares but#my bedroom at home was getting kinda redone this summer#we repainted and added shelves above my desk and styff#so i displayed my album collections on the shelves it was so slay ok it was fire#and#today as i was adjusting things#the shelf with my skz collection just fucking rips out of the wall bro#like BROO?? there are holes in my wall now but idec bro MY ALBUMS???? l#it was so high up too im. they fell from a catastrophic height.#literally every single one of my skz albums falling to the floor which is like at least 50 or smth idek#no that sounds too high but you know. A LOT#i have from mixtape to rockstar not every singlr one but yeah#MY LIMITED ALBUMS?? THESR ARE EXPENSIVE HOLY#im taking a deep breath rn#actually looking from through my tears they didnt look Too beat up (except noeasy fuck that packaging) and except my stay in playground pho#photobook case CRACKEDDDD og my god. its judt the outer plastic case but i. am. so. sad#that is like $50 bro#anyway god#now we have to somehow fix it. we used these shelves before in my sisters room and they've held up great but she pretty much puts stuffed an#animals and thats it lol#did not account for my shitload of albums creating a ton of weight but well.#theyre supposed to hold 170 lbs are my albums rly more than that holy shit#ANYWAY#this litrtally happenrd 15 minutes ago thats why im venting rambling idk#now i have to sleep in my moms room AGAINN until these are fixed#like i love her but i like sleeping alone god pls#(i also primarily write at night and. well its not the easiest to write smut and stuff when ur mother is right next to u.)#GOD UGH. idk its fine but im#silver lining is it wasnt my loona collection bc not only are those rare ash i swear they dent from a strong gust of wind bro#I REACHED TAG LIMIT LMAO I DIDNT KNOW THAT WAS A THING BYE
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"And if you think you have everything..." "Then You Don't Know Seas!"
Original designs by @aabaacuus
Splatoon Script Translation:
You Don't Know Seas
Boxed Out!
#this was really fun to make! I had a lot of fun using the textured shading and the colored lines!#I decided to name their duo “You Don't Know Seas.” It's not very catchy...but maybe I'll come up with something better#jackbox#jackbox games#i am very normal about jackbox#splatoon#splatoon album cover#splatoon art#jackbox fanart#schmitty#josh schmitty schmitstinstein#cookie masterson#ydkj#splatbox#jackbox au#art#artists on tumblr#inkling#octoling#edit: I think it would actually sound better if the band was named “You Don't Know THE seas”#Sometimes i not can think
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Full offense but fans who get to go to fanmeets or performances and get close enough to take pictures and then proceed to whitewash the boys or maybe even face app their features so a nose looks smaller or sharper, skin texture is non existant, etc etc. Are literally bastards to me. You don't deserve to be there.
#like i expect nothing from companies or magazines#but when people who supposedly love these guys but then horrendously alter how they look ?????#like how can you be all I love felix so much hes my favourite guy i spent a stupid amount of money on albums 🫶#and then make him pale as a sheet of paper no freckles in sight ?#i mean it does go to show that a lot of people dont think of them as actual yk. people. theyre just little characters to them#but regardless Hate you!!#like its one thing if you take a pic and the lightings weird but you just post it as is bc thats literally how the stage looked#but i mean the instances were it was 100% face tube editing type shit#a few pics ive seen on twt were so bad for this one of felix and one of jeongin were almost like.#idk they looked ai generated or somethinf i hate it#i remember a kstew fan back in the day used to do that like the most severe insta editing and i was just?????? she doesnt look like that#how do you have a fan blog and then go and do that the scary face is not real
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sometimes you need to go back and listen to the music you liked when you were 13 because it's good for you. and no im not talking about like emo nostalgia in this case we have enough posts about that. im talking about dad rock. actually im just talking about barenaked ladies
#idk if i'd call barenaked ladies dad rock per se but every once in a while i'll hear a song and go MAN. I REMEMBER THAT#i had so many oc animatics in my head about this one....#anyway skrunk lore moment but i had a really intense bnl phase for like 8 months in early middle school which explains a lot about 13 y/o me#in a neutral way but like. yeah. anyway go listen to box set for me.#you don't have to listen to anything else even though i still have a great fondness for a lot of it bc it's one of those things where it's#so familiar to me that i don't even know if i think it's good or not. but box set goes hard and i'll stand by that#in the car and hello city and i'll be that girl and spider in my room AND CALL ME CALMLY and blame it on me and alternative girlfriend and#the flag and when i fall and the king of bedside manor and am i the only one.... ohgh#AND YES IT'S BASIC BUT IF I HAD $1000000 IS COZY. IT'S CUTE OK#OH and it's all been done for all your immortal/reincarnation ship needs. well. a certain vibe anyway#and alcohol. and OH MY GOD I FORGOT JANE. AND INTERMITTENTLY and break your heart.... waaaaaaa#man they have way way more albums than i thought they had#i can only really speak for gordon born on a pirate ship and maybe you should drive actually but. i like those#or i Did like them. havent relistened but even looking at the titles is making me giggly like... i forgot some of these#ALSO SHOEBOX IS A FRIENDS SONG?? WHUH?#or maybe it was used in friends? idk. no thoughts on friends but they did music for just the dumbest shit. ignore that for me please#ANYWAY. going to go listen to all of that now bc im having a moment. if you listen to it and don't like it um. don't think less of me lol <3
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youtube
Salamander Cover, featuring @astarryserenade!
I have no idea how to put a video together but by god do I know how to draw Salamander Outfit 😤
#milgram#deco*27#fuuta kajiyama#ill keep this post short because ive been annoying enough previously asdasdas#but WOO i dont really post on youtube so this is cool!!!#so hyped rn :'D#i tried using actual text on the thumbnail but it looked too stiff - i hope my handwriting doesnt look too dumb 🤔#i never realized how busy the milgram album covers are huh#lots of text...#congrats on 2k!! so exciting!!#music#my art#Youtube
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wow i’m back! and with an Art at that. crazy.
this man has got me in a chokehold. it’s becoming an issue.
#i couldn’t tell if this drawing was Actually Good or not so. we’ll see?#i’ve been listening to almost exclusively the in case i make it album this last week and all the songs are <3#equally devastating and effervescent#anyways. i’m not dead just a lot less active but i want to be here more because it was a good break but i kinda miss it so#will wood#wwatt#what other tags do people use??#doodles#drawing#sketch#art#anddddd i think that’s all. man i’m rusty
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