#I HAVE A FUCKING CONCERT TO GO TO 😭😭
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Would like to respectfully throw my uterus into the sun
#in my 8 years of having my period. I have been on time maybe. twice?#AND TODAY I HAVE TO BE ON TIME!?#I HAVE A FUCKING CONCERT TO GO TO 😭😭#like instead of vibing in the shower this morning I was almost crying thinking about how I don't have any friends#and I've never been anyone's first choice#et cetera et cetera#and I've actually got anxiety cause I'm looking forward to the concert I love the artist#but I'm going with my brother which. I don't know if we have a good relationship or not#I'm just on guard around him ever since he said I was a bad person and treat everyone horribly a few weeks ago#which made me feel v suicidal 🙃🙃#also I'm trying to get over this fact but I ordered a shirt from etsy#to wear to this concert#in MAY#and it hasn't arrived#so I requested a refund ofc#and I have a different outfit I can wear I was just. really looking forward to wearing this shirt#trying to not cry over that because in reality it's NOT that big of a deal but it feels like a big deal to me#also I don't have all the lyrics to the set memorized? which im nervous of actually?#idk guys im just. im so not fucking feeling great rn which sucks cause todays supposed to be a good day
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Dear Life,
i am disappointed in you.
love,
the human who has to live
#feelings#cant go to YET another concert#i bought tickets to this adorable indie pop musician... who is basically a golden retriever in human form#but now there is flooding in vienna and many other parts of austria so i can't go#and the cruelest part about this is that this was supposed to be a tiny band-aid for me missing out on#the eras tour#taylor swift#taylor swift eras tour#and now i can't go there too#because... it is all because of the#climate crisis#and politics#didn't do shit to stop it#and this is just a tiny part of letting me know how fucked we all are#so yeah#thoughts#i am disappointed#and sad#and angry#i could have seen#casey lowery#btw#😭💔#turtely#turtely's OP
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I’ve been to a lot of concerts in my life, but nothing has ever made me as anxious as the simple thought of trying to get bts/solo tickets and they aren’t even coming here anytime soon!!???
#just seeing everything getting sold out in minutes is making me crazy#it’s gonna be a blood bath here#fuck they played two days in a stadium in 2019#they gonna need to do a residency here#also this membership bs is making me scared#i know a lot of gringos want to see them in brasil#idk if they'd use membership pre-sale here bc they never have#and i dont think a lot of brazilians pay for it#usually there's an exact amount of tickets on pre-sale so it doesnt get sold out#and other people can still try to buy on the general sales#im going insane over a concert that doesnt even exist yet 😭
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it’s only been 2 weeks of the school term and already i can feel that i am NOT regaining all of my spell slots per long rest
#i have so much fucking reading bro i have no free time 😭#plus today is the only day this week i haven’t had an 8pm rehearsal/concert 😭 do NOT go to music school i’m so fucking busy#in the free time i do have i don’t even have the energy to do anything fun i just scroll tumblr 😭 help#yeehaws
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I'M ALIVE.... barely.............. god what......... a concert
I can't believe me and stray kids existed in the same room THEY ARE ACTUALLY REAL
#i've got blisters my voice is scratchy and i feel like i could sleep for a whole year#it was so worth it#bro social path live was a fucking EXPERIENCE#better high than drugs could ever give you#I HAVE SO MANY PICTURES AND VIDEOS AHHHHHHH#also i ran out of storage half way thru the concert I had to delete genshin & starrail off my phone MID WAY THRU A SONG HASDHJKSAKDHJSAJKDH#the only downside was I wish I sat with people who were hyped up just as me >:( one side was an empty chair???#and the other side was a MOM LMAOOOOO#clearly only there for her daughter 😭 which is cute ig but lady could of at least learnt all 35 songs man#ANYWAYS#I'm home now#gonna go look at my pictures and sob LIKE I WAS THERE I SAW THEM AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#i'll upload my most devastating pictures soon#fox rambles
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my mission this october is to just persuade (and, if push comes to shove, affectionately force) my friends to come watch the eras tour film with me on november 3rd, the marvels on november 10th, and the ballad of songbirds and snakes on november 17th. next month calendar is booked and busy, it seems!!
#i think i've got the marvels one secured because fortunately some of my friends are also a fan of marvel (or enjoy it at least)#eras tour and hunger games though ://#i have a couple of riends that might be interested to watch the film so i think i'm just going to try to ask them#before falling into despair#hunger games is the hard part#NO ONE i know is a fan of it 😭#none of my close friends seem to have heard of anything about it either#and my sister is fucking tired of me ranting about it so might just go alone if i can#my school is also holding a concert next month so that's another thing#the marvels#the eras tour#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#tbosas#mcu#taylor swift#the hunger games#thg#nadirants
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Finds out about the most perfect concert ever in May (I love TBM and boyfriend loves Essenger)
The tickets:
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I'm going to kill you AND myself fuck offffffffffff
#sucktacular sucks#idk when these even went on sale i never even knew im SO pissed#we would have gone in a heart beat LMAO 😭😭😭#ive always wanted to see TBM live and bf would adore seeing essenger so its like FUCK FUCK FUCK#too poor to even consider buying the scuzzy ass scalper tickets 🙄#again killing them with rocks and shit fuck off fuck off fuck off#like from $39 with fees to fucking $150???? nasty go eat glass tbh#like whatever ill live ill move on its whatever man but also im biting you so hard#also ily tbm i love that youre so popular in europe but also COME PLAY IN CANADA AGAIN PLEASE FUCK#*$32#we both havent been to a real concert ever so it was like heaven opened up and then all we could do#was kinda vaguely look at it in the distance fjjsbfjsjfbs#only concert ive ever been to was fucking shania twain when i was a child i cant live like this LMAO#maybe one day breaking benjamin or Red will come here....... and that we'll have money for tickets#and that we'll get them before theyre $500+ a piece
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When you get this, list 5 songs you like to listen to, publish. Then, send this to 10 of your favourite followers <3
Ask You Tonight by Big Time Rush
Lonely Eyes by Chris Young
I Don't Mind by USHER feat. Juicy J
Young Queen by Mimoza
Roll On (Eighteen Wheeler) by Alabama
#my dad's driven a semi-truck since before I was born & i have *complicated feelings* abt my dad#but it still hits me really hard sometimes#probs the abandonment issues that come along w that buuuuttttt lol#I took my sisters to a BTR concert a few summers ago & it was magic 😭#I grew up on them & then my baby sister got into them & wanted to go for her graduation present & I literally jumped to buy the tickets#core memory stg#also I'm not sending 50 people or whtvr these ask. idek that I talk to that many people on here or irl 😭#Chris Young is like. my fav country artist I want to see him in concert so fucking bad#he has so many beautiful love songs#just banger after banger after banger#Tay shares music AND life experience.#I don't think that's what the game was after but oh well! I'm a yapper#(hello my grandpa literally called me Yappy growing up. I was yapping before it was socially acceptable lol)
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I miss seeing BC live and the way it makes me feel
#i miss the 45-60 minutes during which i forget everything that's wrong with me and my life#the minutes during which i forget what a complete fuck-up i am#i miss feeling like i'm not the worst person ever#even though i still have to go back to being my shitty self living my shitty little life after the concert#at least for a little while i can feel like everything's alright#also i miss them?? like?? so much?????? 😭#3 and half weeks never felt so long 😩
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happy flat fuck friday I feel likr I've been run over by a steamroller <3
#someones car alarm (?) went off in the middle of the night and then i couldnt sleep properly again after#and kept having nightmares.. had a rly scary one right before i woke up where i was lactating blood and it wouldnt stop coming out#i onoy noticed at first bc the shirt i was wearing had massive growing bloodstains onnthe front and then i took it off qnd there it was#and no one was around and it was night and i went outside and i was on this empty rocky beach and j had this sudden realisation#that i was going to die here like this. i was rly lightheaded from the blood loss so i sat down and just stared at the water#and then my alarm went off like fucking hellllll. wild dysphoria dream i guess 🫠🫠🫠🫠#anyway yeah whatever just gotta get thru work today hey the moons out sorry unrelated just noticed her. hi#climbing was fun last night tho :^) and i have a concert tomrorow yayyyy#dont know the band super well but only bc i havent listened to much of them but i like all ive listened to theyll be sick live i reckon#my roommate knows them more than i do but wouldnt go by herself so im dragging her with me >:)#and surprisingly a fair few number of ppl from climbing are going too which is cool ill try n say hi to some of them#actuallt there are 2 bands i should listen to the album of the other one before tomorrow too. mahbe on the bus home#guys i am sotireddddd 😭😭😭😭#MAY skip my afternoon meds so i can sleep straight after showering and eating once im home. we'll see#depends what i have to do this afternoon at work i dont even rember.. i think i have training maybe#we willl seeeee i dont mind being at work that much anyway its all good. maybe i will take my meds so i can play elden ring later#okayyyy bye#.diaries
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:|
#biggest regret rn not going to the emaiIs i cant send tour LMFAO#i did also forget general sale was at 10am today but whatever#the prices are not great :DDD so :DDD oh well :DDD not that invested in going to concerts anyway :DDD#i really am like ... not all that invested but it is .... a tiny bit annoying to me personally LMFAO#that she has all these new fans who like nonsense and feather and espresso and pls pls pls (and more ik but i'm being petty) and i'm like#WHITE FLAG <333 DON'T WANT IT BACK <333 RUN AND HIDEEEEEE#i am feeling gatekeepy 😀#where's my ticket just for the fact that i sat there learning the lyrics to white flag and your love's like#and sang them all the fucking time i literally remember this i was on a trip in china learning those lyrics singing those songs#in the shower in the car everywhere#anyway it's fine she wouldn't play those anyway hahaha so#i'll just listen to evolution and be mildly disappointed#lol i rly like don't even care about concerts That much i obviously did not try that hard#and i'm like fine w not going#just in an ideal world#i would be seeing CONAN AND MAISIE THAT WEEKEND WHICH I AMMMMMMMM#and sabrina later that week lol#but . at least i seeing conan and maisie :DDDDDD bc i do have a friend who's better at getting concert tickets than me LOL#the tickets were like $60 or smth like bro and all the sabrina tickets left now are like $200 and more 😭😭😭#sooooo ya i Could get sabrina tickets they're there they're not sold out for my show but no lmaoooooooo#i feel like emails would've been in that conan price range :\#anyway yay i'm not seeing sabrina wooo lol#jeanne talks
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i can't believe red rocks is over. what am i supposed to do w myself now
#been looking forward to this show for SO LONG and for it to go by so quickly and now be done. IT'S DEVASTATING :(#i know i still have the sf show and a whole LA trip + show w lauren next week but. i'm fucking sad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#these shows have been what's kept me going for so long and it's so fun they're finally happening but so bittersweet#cos soon they will be over 😭 ugh#i do not have a concert notes run down for red rocks cos i was too busy shouting along to every song and being in the moment w everyone#but i wish i had jotted down more of the things alex said. there was so much i'm not exaggerating. our little man was feeling talkative !!!#i'm still mad we didn't get hello you. but it's probably for the best bc i never would've shut the fuck up abt it and you all would hate me
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guys i am so happy rn like this is one of my best semesters ever in my entire life i think i do this little daily journal thingy and i was a little behind bc ive been busy so i just wrote the one for saturday (girl in red concert) and i just. that was one of the best days i've ever had ever in my entire life i kind of want to cry im like really happy 😭😭😭😭
#it was like#i used to listen to girl in red a LOT#going to a girl in red concert WITH A GIRL would have been like. fucking unimaginable to little 16 year old jay#like that's so crazy#and it worked out so so well it was really good#im just really happy#im also so behind on homework ngl but it's okay it was so worth it 😭#anyways yeah idk i love girl im dating sm she makes me rly happy :) im so glad i get to do things like this with her
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finsihed watching lolla and I just don’t even have any words. They did so fucking amazing every single stage they’re literally such amazing performers it’s insane. I’m so fucking proud of them 😭. They’ve worked so hard😭 their growth is insane they just get bigger and bigger. I’m so glad I’m a moa. IM IN THIS TXT SHIT FOR LIFE
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#THE ARRANGEMENTS FOR EVERY SONG WAS SO FUCKING. GOOD LIKE I LOVED HOW THEY ARRANGED THE SONGS SO MUCH#CYSM GAVE ME CHILLS#ALL THE STAGES GAVE ME CHILLS#I LOVE THEIR BAND SM THEY WERE SO GOOD AND WHEN THEY HAD THEIR LITTLE SOLOS OMGG THEY WERE SO GOOD#me and the bassist 😎🤝#I LOVE THE ARRANGEMENT OF DO IT LIKE THAT IT WAS SO GOOD AND THEM ALL SINGING AND THE FULL CHOREOO AHH SO GOOD#when they played anti romantic I was literally crying tears especially blue spring like I was sobbing#WHEN THEY PLAYED WISHLIST I WAS LITERALLY SOBBING STREAMS OF TEARS#it really was 100k people at a txt concert#they made history !#the crowd was so massive omg it actually made me feel nauseous with how many people were there ngl#imagine being at the back of that 😭😭 how did people even get so close#I can’t believe people got to experience that in person I’d do anything for it I’m so fucking depressed#I love tubatu so fucking much they did so good they’re literally amazing they’re literally born to the performers#live bands with txt work so fucking well I’ve never seen a kpop group where live bands just SOUNDS SO FUCKING AMAZING AND GO SO WELL#THEYRE LITERALLY MADE TO BE ROCKSTARS#they should have live bands at their concerts 😩😩
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went to see the aces yesterday which first of all they were amazing it was my first time going to a concert w lesbian music and it was very special to me (also the lead singer was so sexy btw js 😩) but ANYWAY. i asked my friend if she wanted to go w me & she had never listened to them before but she said she would and i sent her some of their music to listen to etc etc. so like we went to the concert it was great and afterwards she told me she thought it was boring and she didn’t like the music. which was kind of crazy to me bc it’s like indie pop/rock music and like as someone who does not enjoy the majority of indie music bc i find it boring their music is not boring 😭 so first of all i find that offensive. second of all she was like well if you find a concert from x artists then i would enjoy that and she listed like three artists to me one of which was taylor swift and i was like. yeah where am i gonna get taylor swift tickets lmfao. but the other artist she listed (i don’t remember the third one she said lol) i just looked up his music and i’m legit like 😭😭😭 first of all this man looks like he just finished hibernating for the winter and crawled out of the cave into the sun for the first time in months. second of all. that’s also what his music sounded like. my point being that going to this man’s concert while he strums a single guitar in a flannel shirt and jeans would be a million times more boring than watching women having fun on stage and singing abt lesbianism idk call me crazy………it’s like i would find it more understandable if it was at LEAST interesting music………
#michelle speaks#& i said to her well you prob would’ve enjoyed it more if u knew the songs#& she looked at me like i was legit crazy & was like i knew the lyrics they repeated them#i was like. just bc you get what’s being said doesn’t mean you know the song like that’s not what i mean…..#like i’m sure i’d enjoy a concert of that man if i knew his songs at least even if i didn’t really like them#at least somewhat even if it wasn’t the best time of my life#bc part of what makes a concert fun is being able to sing along…..like ur going to at least enjoy it more if u do#also she did not like violet by hole. how do you as a woman not enjoy violet by hole. omggggggggg#but like u know if she didn’t like the music that’s fine like w/e but she was making it so obvious to me that she didn’t#like i was like what did u think and she was like um. it was good. u know. and i was like oh so you didn’t like it#& she immediately was like i didn’t want to say but it was so boring and i was like. ok. u didn’t have to actually.#it did just annoy me bc it’s like i really enjoyed it and she like immediately took me out of it w that…..#like instantly lost my post concert glow 😔#anyway tho she was wrong it was actually great & someone threw a lesbian flag on stage at some point & she was holding it#while singing a love song abt another woman & it meant so much to me 💞 my friend simply cannot understand……#also if u think i’m joking abt this man i was so shocked when i saw his spotify header i legit said no fucking way out loud 😭
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Can’t wait for the moment I won’t worry about my health anymore
#I honestly had enough#everytime I lil something weird about I panic#tomorrow is my MRI#I Hope they find the reason why am like this#everyone is sure it’s anxiety but even tho I never been diagnosed I know I’ve been dealing with anxiety since forever#maybe it did get worst but out of a sudden like this ??? it’s just so weird to me#except my health nothing makes me more anxious than I was last month or even last year#I feel like I’m even more at peace with what makes me anxious….#idk but I’m tired of feeling like this#i also hope whatever the answer will be that it’s not dangerous for my life#and that there’s a solution cause I’m going to go insane#the concert was great but I feel like it may have fucked up my body again I climb so many stairs cause I was at the balcony 😭#alex.txt
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