#Him And Ron and Dumbledore and James

[springs-hurts]

okay not much hate against Remus but how tf people read His part in the story and came to conclusion that Harry deserved him as Godfather and not Sirius and James made a mistake(not lily, see she knew it was mistake, nvm Lily loved Sirius as well)

Like did we not read how He never visited harry when he was a kid? How even after meeting him, seeing Harry by his own eyes, he still didn't interact with him during whole goblet of fire, even though Harry was Hogwarts champion, still at risk? No? Like wow man! This man only knew how to Run away from his problems, how to avoid them best.

And the number of fics I've read where he's "2nd godfather", " Better than Sirius ", " I'm sorry for doubting you Remus, begging you please forgive me, nvm you doubted me as well" Like gods!!

Harry's Godfather, Sirius Black did not live on rats only for you to say He didn't deserve to be his godfather.

He did not went to privet drive just after breaking from Azkaban for you to say "James and Lily were wrong to go for Sirius"

He doesnt deserve it, and I'm glad now I've seen that changing. While not enough but atleast not how it was before!

[sparsilees]

tom riddle is a yapper. he loves his monologues and dramatics.

draco malfoy is a yapper. he, too, loves the sound of his voice and dramatics.

ron weasley has no qualms about being loud and seen. he grew up in a large household, fighting to be heard over his siblings.

harry potter grew up in a cupboard, friendless except for the spiders, and learned to subdue and suppress and submit at the dursleys. he isn’t loud, he isn’t boisterous, he isn’t talkative, he doesn’t like socialising, he keeps his opinions in his head and his feelings buried inside, he has very few close friends, he doesn’t reveal his worries and struggles easily, he dislikes showing his pain and weakness, and he sure doesn’t give up his secrets and personal details freely, sometimes not even to ron and hermione.

this is what canon harry’s like—very quiet and an introvert, someone who speaks when spoken to or has cause to broadcast his voice, and someone who’d rather blend into the walls than draw unnecessary attention to himself.

[rogata453]

It actually pisses me of when people underestimate Harry.

He was, in fact, powerful and good wizard. If you’ve only watched the movies, I’m not listening to your opinion and „bUt hE oNlY kNeW ExPeLliArMuS”. He knew a lot of spells and taught them to others in Dumbledore’s Army. So what the fuck are you talking about? He was able to produce a Patronus at 13, something many adult wizards struggle with. Not to mention, he aced his Defense Against the Dark Arts OWLs and was the only one in his class who could resist the Imperius Curse. He wasn’t just a lucky kid who survived Voldemort—he was skilled, resourceful, and a natural leader.

He’s so underrated in his own series.

[lovebeatriceplz]

Stay Alive 🐍 (pt. 1??)

Severus Snape x (death eater) Student! Reader (platonic)

Js a little Drabble

“ I think Malfoy may be working for the dark lord”. Harry allows his words to sink in, gauging your reaction closely, for a second he thinks you’re about to shut the idea down like everyone else. Your face betrays no emotion, but inside you were panicking. “How did you come to that conclusion Harry? Surely you couldn’t accuse him of such a thing because of his father-”. “No- no that’s not-” He removes his glasses, rubbing his hands over his face in frustration. Suddenly the space feels too small. Oh how you wish you could just tell him, tell him that he was correct, tell that you were deatheater too. But how would he react? Would he turn you in? Push you away? Would he understand?. It was too risky, Harry, your dear friend, it pains you everyday to know that you indirectly contribute to his suffering. “Harry I have something to tell you” you blurt out.

He slowly looks up, you have his undivided attention. “I- i think you might…you might”. Someone clears their throat, the sound startling both of you, you whip your head around to lock eyes with the one and only Professor Snape. He saunters over with quick, deliberate strides. “Students should not be loitering in the halls” his eyes Harry up and down “Unless you desire Gryffindor to lose ten more points, Potter” he speaks his name as if it was poison.

“We were just leaving” Harry murmurs, taking your arm as he starts to walk off. Snape catches you by the collar of your robe “Not. you.”. Harry reluctantly let’s go. You turn around to face Snape fully. “Care to share what you and Potter were discussing?” He asks, brow quirking. A scoff escapes you “That was a private conversation-” He cuts you off abruptly, pinning you against the wall. “What. were you about to tell him?” His tone is harsher than before, sending a course of fear through you. You swallow loudly. “My secret.” you say quietly. His eyes narrow, as if you were only confirming his suspicions and this was not news to him. “Why on earth would you do that? Are you trying to sabotage this entire mission” He mutters through gritted teeth, his grip becoming tighter.

“He’d understand!” you shout - whisper. “He’d understand that it isn’t by choice!”. He rolls his eyes, pursing his lips. He’d rather do anything else than babysit another student, but he can’t. “Do you really have that much faith in that boy..” he mutters, sounding absolutely done with you. “Why can’t we just tell him? Everything I mean” you just start to speak without thinking, the weight of carrying around this burden finally causing you to falter. “They’ll figure it out, it’s inevitable, if everyone- just stopped lying to him-”. An exasperated sigh interrupts you “Oh for the love of Merlin” he pinches the bridge of his nose. “It’d be simpler, all, all of…this! I should just tell them-”. He pushes you against the wall with more force. “If you care about your companions you keep your mouth shut or they’re all good as dead!” he doesn’t expound, leaving it at that, letting you go. “Stupid child” he barks, smoothing out the crumpled fabric of your sleeve.

“Get out of my sight”. You’ve just pushed yourself off the wall when his voice stops you once more. “Time is drawing nearer, the dark lord’s return is dawning upon us all, and my objective will be carried out…soon”. You look around to make sure the very open hallway is empty, but if he’s speaking so freely he must deem it safe. He continues. “When that time comes, you will lay low until the horror show has passed”. The initial confusion in your expression, contorts into anger and betrayal.

“No I have to fight…i…no, no I need to fight I need to do something” you protest. “Good. day.” You watch your whole world spin as he starts to depart. Quickly, you grab his hand to stop him and he physically tenses up. “I cannot just watch from the sidelines,not after everything that git has put me through, not after what he did to my brother.”. He scoffs once more, but there’s hardly any bite behind it. He jerks his hand free from your hold. “And what do you propose I do?” he’s not even looking at you, it made you feel small. “Send me, send me with Draco when he..” you find yourself not being able to finish that sentence.

His previous petulance returns, and he approaches aggressively, you almost think he’s about to pounce on you. “No such thing will take place, do you comprehend?” It’s obvious that it takes all his willpower to not grab you by the shoulders and shake some sense into you. “Listen to me and listen closely, you are not Draco, you don’t have anyone, no one to look out for you. He has his parents, you only have me!” He speaks swiftly and sharply. You have nothing to say, but it doesn’t matter because he wasn’t finished. “So much work, i’ve done, to make sure that no one suspects a thing, you are practically invisible to the dark lord and that’s the best you could hope for, stay. Alive.”

“Professor Snape, I cannot, have an opportunity to avenge my brother and not cease it, he would have never let that happen if I was the one to die that night” you confess quietly, hoping that your words had some effect on him. His expression remains annoyed and cold, as always. He sighs, placing his hands on his hips. “So this is for your brother?” He asks, you nod. He massages his temples, eyes scrunching as if he were in pain “I might vomit”. He paces for a few seconds, you wonder if he remembers you’re there. Large hands tightly, almost painfully grip your shoulders. “Listen, you insufferable dingbat, your mother can’t take another heartbreak, losing two children? In such a timely manner?”. You couldn’t tell if he was sincerely concerned or trying to talk you out of your ideas.

You stand your ground. “I’ve made up my mind, I’m not asking you to throw me into a boxing ring, but I must help in any way I can”. He nods, letting go of you, he slams his palm into the wall, the sound echoing. It’s almost comedic how quickly he goes back to his indifferent demeanor. “You aren’t. Ready” he says bluntly. “Meet me in the dungeons, I’ll have a few things to teach you, do not come before midnight” He turns to walk off, for the last time he hopes. You nod slowly, pausing as a thought occurs to you. “Wait- what about my prefects-”. He doesn’t turn around “figure it out” now he’s gone, leaving in the same abrupt manner he arrived. Such an odd man, you think. An odd man, that might determine if you make it out of Voldermort’s hold alive or not. Leave overthinking for another time, you have an escape route to figure out.

[snitchsnatcher]

Someone PLEASE tell me if they know of any fanfiction where, sometime after Harry’s second year, Tom Riddle/Voldemort becomes a professor at Hogwarts. I read one fic with this premise after searching for them and it was delightful (it’s the one titled something along the lines of "unapologetic fifth year crack"? I think? It was very funny). It’s just such a funny concept to me.

[hollowdeath]

injured (hjp)

pairing: harry james potter x fem!reader

summary: as hermione's new friend, you and harry are constantly bugging each other any time you're together. however, one day, during training for dumbledore's army, you get injured, causing harry to lash out before promptly carrying you to the infirmary.

word count: 2k

cw: mentions of blood, mostly just fluff, maybe slight angst if you squint hard enough

a/n: yet another lil sfw blurb i wrote between requests <3 hope yall don't mind, might do a part 2 if anyone wants it!

"does she always have to be invited to everything?" harry groans, nodding towards you as you continue trying to steal his scarf. you're both following behind ron and hermione through the snow on the way to hagrid's hut for tea. hermione laughs in response along with you. "yes, she does. it's nice having another girl around." she tells harry, giving you a shy smile. you return the same smile, reaching over to successfully steal harry's scarf from him. "yep, you're stuck with me, potter," you tease him, wrapping the scarf around yourself.

harry rolls his eyes, stealing the scarf back from you. "well, can't you ever bother hermione? your actual friend? or ron? why is it always me?" harry complained as he dodged another attempt at you taking his scarf. "they're not as fun to mess with," you whine, crossing your arms. hermione giggles, giving ron a knowing side-eye that he returns.

you narrow your eyes at their exchange. "what?" you ask them. hermione looks over her shoulder at you with the same smug expression before turning away and giggling again. "hermione," you warn her, uncrossing your arms. she just keeps laughing, only making you more suspicious. "nothing, [y/n]," she tells you sarcastically, shaking her head.

"yeah, mind your business, [y/n]," harry interjects. he flinches when you turn to look at him, making you laugh. "yeah, that's what i thought, potter," you say triumphantly, reaching for his scarf once more.

"seriously?" you ask harry as he takes yet another piece of food off your plate. he's holding back a laugh as he quickly eats it, giving you a devious look. "i asked if you were hungry and you said no! now keep your grubby fingers off my plate," you playfully scold him, pulling your plate closer to you. ron and hermione laugh, giving each other that same knowing look.

"oh i'm not hungry, i just know you hate people taking your food." harry says with a smirk, reaching his hand out again before you smack it away. "ow!" harry exclaims, holding his aching knuckles. "really? you steal my food all the time!"

you're the one smirking this time as you say, "yeah, but it's funny when i do it." taking another bite of your food, harry narrows his eyes at you. he waits for his chance and quickly sneaks another piece of food, successfully stealing it away as you try to stop him. "ha!" he laughs with his mouth full, pointing at you. you give him a look, which makes hermione laugh harder.

"you two are ridiculous," she sighs, taking a bite of her own food. "oh, come on, he started it!" you say with a hand pointed at harry. he pretends to bite your finger and you narrow your eyes at him, reaching to grab the glasses off his face. "no, no, no," harry warns you, frantically grabbing for the glasses to take them from your hands as you lean away from him. "ha!" you repeat after him, pointing at him as you continue pulling away from his grasp. harry leans across the table and nearly falls before he successfully snatches the glasses from your fingers. "ha!" he says again with a cocky smile, sitting down and placing them back on his face.

ron rolls his eyes, taking a sip of his drink. "i agree with hermione. ridiculous." he says with that same knowing smile. harry scoffs, giving ron a look. "whatever," he shrugs him off. "she started it," harry repeats after you, nodding in your direction as he tries to hide his smirk. you roll your eyes at him, but you're hiding the same devious smile.

"late again, ms. [y/l/n]?" harry asks you in a teasing voice as you walk down the hall towards the room of requirement. you rolled your eyes at him. "shut it, potter. just be glad i came." you snap back, giving him a smirk as you pass through the doorway.

harry followed you in, making sure no one was watching behind him. he began the meeting thanking everyone for coming back for yet another round of training for dumbledore's army, and wanted to go over defense tactics again. as he started reviewing all the different spells and wand movements from the week prior, he asked everyone to partner up and work on practicing them again.

the session was going really well, and harry was helping people individually to get the motions perfect. he was just working with a first year student when he heard a yell from behind him, followed by a crash and a crowd of gasps. harry spun on his heel to see hermione running from across the room, dropping her wand in the process. this immediately worried harry more.

he made his way to the gathering crowd in the corner when he heard hermione say your name in exasperation. harry's pace picked up and he pushed himself through the crowd of students urgently.

he found hermione kneeling at your side, blocking his view of you. only your converse-covered feet littered with rubble and dust were visible from his angle. harry quickly rushed to your other side, his stomach dropping at the sight of your unconscious body, freezing completely when he notices blood coming from under your shirt. hermione was checking your breathing and heartbeat and trying to wake you up. harry's shock flipped into anger within a second, turning to the crowd that had gathered around you.

"who did it?" he asked, his tone rough and impatient. everyone stayed quiet hearing how upset harry was. they had never seen him be anything other than shy, kind, and timid.

"well? who was her partner? huh? who the fuck hit her?" harry yells the last part, causing a few students flinch.

"harry. it was an accident." hermione snaps towards him, causing him to look back at her. he's breathing heavily, staring into hermione's narrowed eyes as she holds your hand in hers.

harry's anger subsided, if only for a moment, seeing your shirt start to stain with blood. his anger was replaced with concern, dropping to one knee and picking you up in his arms. "harry," hermione tries to stop him, but harry interrupts her. "i'm taking her to the infirmary now. i'll make up something on the way. send everyone home." he tells hermione in a rushed voice as he carefully adjusts you in his arms, your neck limp as your head falls into harry's chest.

he rushes out of the room, ron holding the doors open for him, giving him a tight smile with worried eyes. "she'll be alright, mate," ron tries to reassure him, but harry's already practically jogging to the hospital wing.

a few hours later the sun has long since set, and you open your eyes to a dark room lined with windows showing the stars outside. you try to sit up in the bed you're lying in and you're immediately hit with an intense wave of pain, making you groan and wince. you notice movement to your right and turn to see harry's sleeping body on a chair pulled up beside your cot. you hadn't even seen him at first, so you were a bit surprised, letting out a gasp at his sudden presence.

this wakes him up, his eyes snapping open towards you and standing from his uncomfortable sleeping position to come to your side. "[y/n]," he says softly, his voice still groggy, hands resting on your shoulders to lay you back down again. you groan again as you lie back, your face twisted in pain. harry winces just the same, moving the pillow under you to better support your neck.

"i know, it's okay, you're okay," he coos. you look at him weirdly, never experiencing this caring side of him so intimately. "what happened?" you ask, glancing at the IV machine attached to your arm. "am i in the infirmary?"

harry sighs, his eyes searching you carefully for any discomfort. "yes, you are. your bloody first year partner hit you with his stupefy and nearly killed you." harry informed you, his voice gradually getting angrier before stopping himself to take a deep breath. "sorry. i didn't mean that. all you got was a concussion, and a nasty scar on your stomach. but, he could've hurt you worse," harry tells you, the anger returning any time he mentions your partner. "i swear to you, [y/n], he's never coming to another practice again. and i don't care if he tells the whole school, that kid is finished."

you can't help but chuckle at how riled up harry is, earning a confused look from him. you shake your head weakly. "it was probably just an accident, potter. no need to pitch a fit." you tell him with that same smirk as always. harry's body relaxes, breathing a sigh of relief at your nonchalant reaction and usual sarcasm making its return. though he wants to roll his eyes at how unaffected you are learning about your injuries, he's too concerned to even pretend to joke.

"wait, how did i get here? i don't even remember walking in," you say in confusion, trying to recall the afternoon. harry awkwardly shifts his weight beside you. "yeah, um, well, i had to carry you." he tells you. you shoot him a look full of confusion, shock, and humor. "you? you carried me across the school?" you ask with an incredulous chuckle. "you were unconscious! and bleeding! i had to get you here quickly." harry defends himself, throwing his arms up.

you laugh and shake your head again, rubbing your face. "since when have you started caring about my well being, potter? i thought i was just a pest to you," you inquire, cocking an eyebrow at harry. he nervously blinks and looks away from you, clearing his throat. "you were under my supervision, didn't want you to sue me or anything." harry says with a smirk, still awkwardly shifting his weight back and forth with his hands in his pockets.

"right," you scoff at him jokingly.

harry sighs, pulling his seat closer to your bed so he can sit down again. "look," he says, his eyes still not quite meeting yours. "i know we joke around a lot, and, y'know, you may even actually annoy me a bit sometimes…" he trails off, chuckling to himself. you lightly slap his leg closest to you, holding back your own laugh.

"but, seeing you like that on the ground, seeing the blood, i was terrified. i didn't know if you were okay and that killed me. i don't know what i would've done if…" he trails off again, his voice caught in his throat.

you give harry a sympathetic smile, studying his tired face. he was looking towards the ground, his hair disheveled, glasses hanging low on the bridge of his nose. he looked upset as his eyebrows furrowed together in thought.

"did you stay here all day?" you asked him softly. harry looks up at you with surprise, his eyes studying yours. "yeah," he says simply. you look to your left towards a grandfather clock and see it's nearly 3 in the morning.

you give him another curious look. "harry," you start to say, but you're at a loss for words. he chuckles again, his eyes still studying yours intently. "i wasn't leaving. the nurses nearly fought me multiple times." he tells you bluntly. you laugh, wincing at the pain it causes you, but can't hold back. "harry, you didn't have to do that."

harry gives you a half hearted smile. "i know," he shrugs.

you return the smile. "well, thank you, then. for waiting and for bringing me here." you thank harry genuinely, causing him to blush and wave you off. you reach out to poke his sides in attempt to tickle him. "and i guess you really do care, hm?" you tease him.

harry squirms away and laughs, his blush intensifying. "yeah, yeah, whatever."

[hollowed-theory-hall]

Harry's an Introvert

I mentioned some of it in a reblog here and here, but kinda wanted to give it its full post with more quotes from the books as evidence.

Becouse Harry was raised in a cupboard, pretending to not exist at the Dursleys. He isn't loud or talkative and he doesn't like interacting with most people (some characters, like Sirius, are an exception). I want to bring up some quotes to prove it because Harry is not a boisterous jock, that was James Potter, not my boy Harry and I will never tire of talking about him.

Exhibit A: He doesn't really care for people beyond his immediate circle

I know this fandom jokes about how Harry doesn't know people he went to school with for 6 years and they take it as a sign Harry is unobservant, but that is not the case. Harry is incredibly observant, he just doesn't actually care about most people. He'd rather stick to his close group of friends and he has no desire to know/speak to anyone outside of this group. There are only 40 students in Harry's year, ~300 in all of Hogwarts, and Harry still doesn't even know all his year or all 70 Gryffindors:

together with a weedy-looking boy Hermione whispered was called Theodore Nott.

(OotP, Ch26)

“This is Cormac McLaggen, perhaps you’ve come across each other — ? No?” McLaggen, a large, wiry-haired youth, raised a hand, and Harry and Neville nodded back at him. “— and this is Marcus Belby, I don’t know whether — ?” Belby, who was thin and nervous-looking, gave a strained smile.

(HBP, Ch7)

Exhibit B: He isn't a yapper

Even in his own friend group, Harry doesn't actually speak much. Throughout the early books especially, most of what Harry thinks stays in his head:

Harry didn’t say anything. He liked being back on speaking terms with Ron too much to speak his mind right now — but he somehow thought that Hermione had gotten the point much better than Ron had.

(GoF, Ch23)

He often doesn't say anything to keep up the peace between him Ron and Hermione.

He actually finds Ron and Hermione's constant bantering exhausting at times. He is a quiet introvert who's friends with two certified yappers:

Harry was too used to their [Ron and Hermione's] bickering to bother trying to reconcile them; he felt it was a better use of his time to eat his way steadily through his steak-and-kidney pie, then a large plateful of his favorite treacle tart.

(OotP, Ch11)

While he likes Ron and Hermione, Harry doesn't like their loud bickering and he finds it annoying:

“Poisonous toadstools don’t change their spots,” said Ron sagely. “Anyway, I’ve always thought Dumbledore was cracked trusting Snape, where’s the evidence he ever really stopped working for YouKnow-Who?” “I think Dumbledore’s probably got plenty of evidence, even if he doesn’t share it with you, Ron,” snapped Hermione. “Oh, shut up, the pair of you,” said Harry heavily, as Ron opened his mouth to argue back. Hermione and Ron both froze, looking angry and offended. “Can’t you give it a rest?” he said. “You’re always having a go at each other, it’s driving me mad.”

(OotP, Ch12)

Exhibit C: He doesn't speak up in class

We basically never see Harry raise his hand to answer a question in class. Usually he needs to be prompted by a teacher to answer:

“This means,” said Professor Lupin, choosing to ignore Neville’s small sputter of terror, “that we have a huge advantage over the boggart before we begin. Have you spotted it, Harry?” Trying to answer a question with Hermione next to him, bobbing up and down on the balls of her feet with her hand in the air, was very off-putting, but Harry had a go.

(PoA, Ch7)

Even when Harry knows the answer to a question or can guess it like in the above quote, he never raises his hand to answer. He usually only answers if prompted by the teacher. Lupin is actually doing something really good here as a teacher. He knows Harry is likely to be able to know the answer so he forces him to participate because otherwise he won't. This is Lupin knowing how Harry is as a student — which is incredibly quiet.

The other teachers notice it too:

“Other teachers report that the boy is modest, likable, and reasonably talented. Personally, I find him an engaging child.”

(DH, Ch33)

Modest and likable, in this case, translates to never talking except to make maybe snigger at a joke Ron made or talk when prompted. Dumbledore only finds him engaging because he talks to Harry near the Mirror of Erised. Most teachers probably barely recognize Harry's voice that first year.

Other characters are surprised Harry is talking back to Umbridge, not just because of what he's saying but because he's actually speaking in class:

Professor Umbridge sat down behind her desk again. Harry, however, stood up. Everyone was staring at him; Seamus looked half-scared, half-fascinated.

(OotP, Ch12)

Something Harry Potter just doesn't really do if the teacher doesn't force him.

That being said, even when teachers force him to speak, even in that first Potions class with Snape, Harry being Harry is unwilling to show weakness. So he sasses Snape and comes off as confident. Because while he doesn't like talking in class, if he does, he'd do so confidently (at least in appearance).

Exhibit D: When upset, he talks even less

When Harry's upset — as in stressed or sad — he talks even less than normal. His coping mechanism for sadness is to burrow into himself and not talk to anyone:

I’m the weapon, Harry thought, and it was as though poison were pumping through his veins, chilling him, bringing him out in a sweat as he swayed with the train through the dark tunnel. [...] “Are you all right, Harry, dear?” whispered Mrs. Weasley, leaning across Ginny to speak to him as the train rattled along through its dark tunnel. “You don’t look very well. Are you feeling sick?” They were all watching him. He shook his head violently and stared up at an advertisement for home insurance. [...] “You look ever so pale. . . . Are you sure you slept this morning? You go upstairs to bed right now, and you can have a couple of hours’ sleep before dinner, all right?” He nodded; here was a ready-made excuse not to talk to any of the others, which was precisely what he wanted, so when she opened the front door he proceeded straight past the troll’s leg umbrella stand and up the stairs and hurried into his and Ron’s bedroom.

(OotP, Ch23)

“How’re you feeling?” asked Hermione. “Fine,” said Harry stiffly. “Oh, don’t lie, Harry,” she said impatiently. “Ron and Ginny say you’ve been hiding from everyone since you got back from St. Mungo’s.” “They do, do they?” said Harry, glaring at Ron and Ginny. Ron looked down at his feet but Ginny seemed quite unabashed. “Well, you have!” she said. “And you won’t look at any of us!”

(OotP, Ch23)

He [Harry] and Hermione ate breakfast in silence. Hermione’s eyes were puffy and red; she looked as if she had not slept. They packed up their things, Hermione dawdling.

(DH, Ch16)

Hermione had taken his hand again and was gripping it tightly. He could not look at her, but returned the pressure, now taking deep, sharp gulps of the night air, trying to steady himself, trying to regain control. He should have brought something to give to them, and he had not thought of it, and every plant in the graveyard was leafless and frozen. But Hermione raised her wand, moved it in a circle through the air and a wreath of Christmas roses blossomed before them. Harry caught it and laid it on his parents’ grave. As soon as he stood up he wanted to leave. He did not think he could stand another moment there. He put his arm around Hermione’s shoulders, and she put hers around his waist, and they turned in silence and walked away through the snow, past Dumbledore’s mother and sister, back toward the dark church and the out-of-sight kissing gate.

(DH, Ch16)

The sea was rushing against the rock somewhere nearby; Harry listened to it while the others talked, discussing matters in which he could take no interest, making decisions, Dean carried the injured Griphook into the house, Fleur hurrying with them; now Bill was really knowing what he was saying. [...] “I want to do it properly,” were the first words of which Harry was fully conscious of speaking. “Not by magic. Have you got a spade?” [...] Harry lost track of time. He knew only that the darkness had lightened a few degrees when he was rejoined by Ron and Dean. “How’s Hermione?” “Better,” said Ron. “Fleur’s looking after her.” Harry had his retort ready for when they asked him why he had not simply created a perfect grave with his wand, but he did not need it. They jumped down into the hole he had made with spades of their own and together they worked in silence until the hole seemed deep enough.

(DH, Ch24)

(I'll note I love that Ron and Hermione understand that sometimes Harry needs to just be around them silently. That sometimes he needs to not talk about it)

And in GoF, the fact he talks to Sirius about what upsets him is special. It's a testament to how much Harry trusts Sirius. He literally says he spoke more to Sirisu in that half an hour than he had in days:

“I’m —” For a second, Harry tried to say “fine” — but he couldn’t do it. Before he could stop himself, he was talking more than he’d talked in days — about how no one believed he hadn’t entered the tournament of his own free will, how Rita Skeeter had lied about him in the Daily Prophet, how he couldn’t walk down a corridor without being sneered at — and about Ron, Ron not believing him, Ron’s jealousy . . .

(GoF, Ch19)

Exhibit E: He hates getting a lot of attention

The prophet and Snape like to paint Harry as an arrogant attention seeker, but that couldn't be further from the truth. Not only is Harry not arrogant and has a pretty low self esteem, he despises getting a lot of attention and wishes to curse and hex people who look at him for too long because it makes him uncomfortable:

It was a state of nervousness so advanced that he wondered whether he mightn’t just lose his head when they tried to lead him out to his dragon, and start trying to curse everyone in sight.

(GoF, Ch20)

People stared shamelessly as he approached. They even pressed their faces against the windows of their compartments to get a look at him. He had expected an upswing in the amount of gaping and gawping he would have to endure this term after all the “Chosen One” rumors in the Daily Prophet, but he did not enjoy the sensation of standing in a very bright spotlight.

(HBP, Ch7)

The third group had a pileup halfway around the pitch. Most of the fourth group had come without broomsticks. The fifth group were Hufflepuffs. “If there’s anyone else here who’s not from Gryffindor,” roared Harry, who was starting to get seriously annoyed, “leave now, please!” [...] Pleased though he was with his choices, Harry had also shouted himself hoarse at the many complainers and was now enduring a similar battle with the rejected Beaters. “That’s my final decision and if you don’t get out of the way for the Keepers I’ll hex you,” he bellowed.

(HBP, Ch11)

He hates the attention he's getting and the more traumatised and angry he gets, the louder he becomes because he needs an outlet.

Further Notes

While he is quiet, he isn't a pushover. As I mentioned here, his quiet often comes off as arrogance rather than meekness. He's quiet in a way that seems mysterious and intelligent rather than dorky and awkward. Even when he does act and feel awkward in many social situations, many people just don't read him as awkward. Like, he's awkward to himself inside his head, but most people who don't know him don't think about it that way:

“Mine was pretty quiet,” said Cho. For some reason, she was looking rather embarrassed. “Erm . . . there’s another Hogsmeade trip next month, did you see the notice?” “What? Oh no, I haven’t checked the notice board since I got back. . . .” “Yes, it’s on Valentine’s Day. . . .” “Right,” said Harry, wondering why she was telling him this. “Well, I suppose you want to — ?” “Only if you do,” she said eagerly. Harry stared. He had been about to say “I suppose you want to know when the next D.A. meeting is?” but her response did not seem to fit. “I — er —” he said. “Oh, it’s okay if you don’t,” she said, looking mortified. “Don’t worry. I-I’ll see you around.” She walked away. Harry stood staring after her, his brain working frantically. Then something clunked into place. “Cho! Hey — CHO!” He ran after her, catching her halfway up the marble staircase. “Er — d’you want to come into Hogsmeade with me on Valentine’s Day?” “Oooh, yes!” she said, blushing crimson and beaming at him. “Right . . . well . . . that’s settled then,” said Harry

(OotP, Ch24)

This is Harry in his most awkward I think. He reads the situation completely incorrectly. But, notice he doesn't ask Cho about the D.A. meeting, it's only in his head, outwardly, it looks to her like he was trying to let her down gently, not like he had no idea what she was talking about. And when he does ask her later, she's the blushing mess, not him. Even if Harry stammers a bit, he gets his point across with a similar level of awkwardness to Cho. It's the typical awkwardness of a 15-year-old asking a girl on a date for the first time and not anything special or beyond the norm. I'd actually say he's more confident about it than many of the guys I went to school with.

TL;DR

He doesn't enjoy talking to most people, but he isn't shy or meek. Nor is he an awkward bubbling fool. He's just an introvert who often rather not to talk to people. But he comes across as a confident quiet, not a shy quiet, because when he does speak — as unoften as it is for people who aren't his friends or Sirius — it's loud, and clear, and confidant.

[hannaxjo]

Alan Rickman, David Thewlis, Gary Oldman and all those are iconic in their roles in Harry Potter, but I’ll always be a bit sad about that casting, because having that ‘Marauders era’ cast be age appropriate would’ve just been so much better for the story.

Sirius wasn’t this old man who spent 12 years in Azkaban, no he got locked up at 21. He spent almost third of his life in a cell. He wasn’t this wise father figure to Harry, he was a reckless thirty-something who never really got the chance to mature past 21.

Remus was an exhausted, bone deep tired man carrying both physical and mental scars from the suffering he went through. Because he’s a werewolf, because of the war, because he lost all of his friends. And he’s only 33 when first introduced.

And Snape. Snape wasn’t an old bitter man who just hated everyone and enjoyed being antagonistic. He was 31 in Harry’s first year. He began to work for Voldemort as a teen, and as a double agent at 20. He’s a thirty-something bitter man, who never got to really live or make real connections. From Harry’s perspective he’s scary and intimidating, but really he’s just kinda…sad and pathetic. And then especially that scene where Snape is begging Dumbledore to help save Lily, and promising anything in return. (Because apparently Dumbledore needs something in return…for saving people.) He’s twenty. Barely out of his teens. Rickman was good in that scene, but having someone who actually looks twenty, would better show how scared, young, guilty and just desperate he was. That might not put Dumbledore in such a good light, though.

And then, the characters I think would’ve been the most important to cast age appropriately. And most people probably already agree and know who I’m talking about. James and Lily. They were 21 when they died. When Harry sees them in the mirror of Erised, they’re 10 years older than him. That’s the age difference Ron has with Bill. In that scene I might understand somewhat them being in their thirties, because that’s what Harry wants. He wants his life with his parents, he wants to have been raised by them. Though, I don’t know if the mirror could know what they might’ve looked like in their thirties, since they didn’t live that long. But then, in the cemetery when Voldemort’s wand spits the last spells cast, we see Lily and James as they were. 21. They’re telling their son to hold on just a moment longer. And they are 7 years older than him. In Deathly Hallows, Harry sees Voldemort kill them. They’re not this happy couple who’s got to love each other for a long time, only to have that happiness torn from them, no they started at Hogwarts ten years ago. They’re 21, and they’ve barely tasted that happiness. At the end of the book Harry talks to his parents. They comfort him and promise to stay with him, as he goes to die. Harry’s seventeen. James and Lily are four years older than him.

It wouldn’t have felt as nice. Harry being comforted by someone who looks almost his age. But it wasn’t nice. It was pretty tragic. Casting people who look 21, would’ve really made it land on the audience. It was a tragedy. They were barely adults.

[cabin07slytherinblogs]

I’ve been doing a lot of research on the wizarding world and here are some canon things I have found out that I didn’t know

Molly and Arthur did not go to school with the marauders. They started in 1961.

Gideon and Fabian were between the ages of 31-41 when they died, I thought they were young like James and Lily. Molly is 2 years younger then them.

Bellatrix, Narcissa, and Andromeda all went to school with Molly and Arthur but they were sorted into Slytherin while Molly and Arthur were sorted into Gryffindor.

Bill was born in 1970, Charlie in 1972, Percy in 1976, Fred and George in 1978, Ron in 1980, and Ginny in 1981.

Molly and Arthur didn’t know that they were having a daughter until Ginny was born.

Hermione Granger is the oldest out of the three friends.

Rowling confirmed Dumbledore’s sexuality

Grindelwald and Voldemort weren’t fighting for the same things

Tom Riddle was conceived under a love potion. Some even say that’s why he can’t feel love.

Hermione became minister of magic

James and Lily had Harry at 19/20 years old

Molly and Arthur married right away after Hogwarts not wanting to waste time. They’ve been together for over 50 years (honestly goals) They also had 12 grandchildren. 5 grandsons and 7 granddaughters.

Hermione’s name means messenger.

The original timeline for the original 7 books/8 movies is 1991-1998

Remus Lupin was bitten by Greyback at age 4 (which I knew) but he was bitten because his father, Lyall, said some pretty nasty/hateful comments about werewolves in front of Greyback so he snuck into Remus’s room and attacked him as revenge

[sparsilees]

it’s almost the end of 2024. can we drop this absolutely inane fanonical idea that harry james potter is “oblivious” or “unobservant” or “average”?

fuck your fanon harry. fuck that soggy tissue who doesn’t inspire confidence in others. fuck that lummox who cannot string a sentence together. fuck that hothead who’d lash out in anger and throw punches at every provocation. fuck that namby-pamby who can’t read clues or between the lines or come up with a plan of action. fuck that sheep who can’t function without hermione’s direction. fuck that neanderthal who’s a messy eater, messy writer, messy speaker, and has poor manners.

who the bloody hell is that? that’s not harry james potter. why are you twisting and malforming him into a bloody clown?

why are you undermining the main character of his own series? boy has an abysmal self-esteem, stays quiet and lowkey, bottles up his truest feelings and thoughts (that we as readers are privy to, but not the other characters!), and has a calm and composed mien so you think you too can dismiss his character easily and strip him down to a skeleton of his canon self and instead carve out huge character growth, redemption arcs, and love letters for everyone else?

you wish to evoke sympathy for draco by making lucius out to be an abusive father and crafting a pitiful childhood for draco when they have an affectionate parent-child relationship canonically, but downplay harry’s abuse? you realise that tom riddle, sirius black, james potter, and hermione granger are acknowledged to be the brightest of their generation, yet forget harry potter and tom riddle are two sides of the same coin, even sharing a similar appearance, and reduce harry to a silly caricature? you make harry magically powerful but wrest his smarts away to highlight someone else’s big brain?

you make him out to be a short dork with a shorter fuse and no idea what’s going on around him when harry and tom are both described as woe-ridden orphans—with all that entails from constant hunger to cold sleepless nights to hypervigilance to the forced, quick maturity—but treat tom true to canon as tall, cunning, and clever, then do an about-face to conveniently slap the malnourished, oblivious, and slacker labels on harry to make him as lesser than?

when he picked up the impervious spell simply from having seen hermione perform it once, when his closest friends have difficulty gleaning his thoughts, when his anger is cold and sharp like dumbledore (ootp was a study in ptsd, next!), when he’s just as tall as his father, was just as ill-treated as a house elf, and rightfully brilliant as the son of lily and james potter—the two powerful and talented individuals who once had voldemort trying to recruit them to join his cause?

the sheer disrespect on his name. the sheer mockery of his character. the absolutely mind-boggling erasure of his most defining traits.

who do you think sussed out most of the big clues, and stowed away all the little, random bits of information in his memory bank, to ultimately piece the puzzle together at the final showdown every end of the school year? who realised as a mere firstie that quirrel was the man hagrid blabbed to about fluffy and the dragon egg? who noted that ginny was withdrawn and unlike herself? who had an inkling fleur had taken a fancy to bill? who picked up on what was brewing between ron and hermione before their own selves? who noticed that hermione cast a confundus on cormac mclaggen during the match? who caught on instantly to the change in tense used for the diadem’s existence and confidently tracked it down? who cottoned on to luna’s longtime disappearance from her cold, untouched bed and the layer of dust? who did voldemort consider his equal? who actually has an uncanny sense of intuition? who calls the shots when the trio gets into a pickle? who?

mcgonagall? flitwick? draco? hermione? blaise zabini? no!

excuse harry for that one time he did not look deeply into the mental workings of a grieving girl because he’s not equipped to deal with them, and has in the first place never been taught to process his own emotions properly because he didn’t grow up in a healthy environment, prohibited from expressing his feelings, let alone vulnerability, and voicing his thoughts!

let’s bury this annoyingly stupid narrative for good. go read the books and refresh your perspective. stop doing him dirty. you’ve already butchered sirius black’s character into a pathetic sisspot. and now you want to assassinate harry’s too.

[saintsenara]

Thoughts on Peter Pettigrew? And if you ship him with anyone, who?

thank you very much for the ask, pal! peter is a fascinating character and i always enjoy properly thinking about him.

because - let's be honest - he really goes under the radar, in both canon and fanon. he's extraordinarily cunning, ruthless, powerful, adaptable, emotionally literate, intelligent…

and yet you wouldn't get that impression if you take harry's narrative at face value. even after peter escapes at the end of prisoner of azkaban/cuts his own hand off in goblet of fire.

[which is one of harry's most interesting character traits - his tendency to split the world into black-and-white "good people" and "bad people" is something we talk about a lot, but he also has a tendency to split the world into "special people, who have agency" and "unspecial people, who don't"... hence his attitude to characters such as stan shunpike.]

but the main thing i find fascinating about peter isn't actually the way his talents are overlooked by the text. it's the way he embodies one of the series' central messages: that "it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live" [PS 12].

when dumbledore says this to harry, it's as advice on how to deal productively with grief. and obviously that's a good and healthy message to receive - especially for the children who are philosopher's stone's intended audience.

but the statement has another application, which ties to another one of the series' themes: that all that glitters is not gold.

so much of the overarching seven-book narrative is about jealousy and longing - harry's longing for a family, ron's jealousy of harry's fame, petunia's longing for magic and jealousy of lily, snape's longing for lily and jealousy of james, etc.

and it's also about how this jealousy and longing leads us to see what we want to see - ron becoming convinced that harry's feelings for hermione are romantic, lupin's inability to criticise james leading to his rage when harry's appalled at him walking out on tonks, the death eaters being convinced that voldemort is a champion of pureblood oligarchy, fudge refusing to believe that voldemort has returned etc.

as both ron and harry learn after ron stabs the locket-horcrux, you have to live the life you actually have and you have to know the people you know as they actually are. you can't imagine them into something they're not, become sad and/or angry when they fail to meet expectations it was always impossible for them to fulfil, and then let that sadness and anger fester until the poison within you can no longer be contained...

which is the peter pettigrew special, really...

sirius' assessment of peter in prisoner of azkaban comes in clutch for us on this point:

"Because you never did anything for anyone unless you could see what was in it for you. Voldemort's been in hiding for fifteen years, they say he's half dead. You weren't about to commit murder right under Albus Dumbledore's nose, for a wreck of a wizard who'd lost all of his power, were you? You'd want to be quite sure he was the biggest bully in the playground before you went back to him, wouldn't you?" [PoA 19]

i love this line for a lot of reasons - especially sirius' tacit admission that he and james once met that criteria of "biggest bully in the playground" - but i particularly like the way it aligns peter with [dumbledore's assessment of] voldemort's school friends:

"As he moved up the school, he gathered about him a group of dedicated friends; I call them that, for want of a better term, although as I have already indicated, Riddle undoubtedly felt no affection for any of them. This group had a kind of dark glamour within the castle. They were a motley collection; a mixture of the weak seeking protection, the ambitious seeking some shared glory, and the thuggish gravitating toward a leader who could show them more refined forms of cruelty. In other words, they were the forerunners of the Death Eaters, and indeed some of them became the first Death Eaters after leaving Hogwarts." [HBP 17]

peter is fundamentally someone ambitious seeking shared glory. and he does this - like, it's implied, quite a lot of death eaters - by putting on his rose-tinted glasses and deluding himself into believing that the person he expects to share that glory with him actually will share it... until everything comes crashing down and he's forced to see that they actually think of him as unworthy of sharing anything with. and his fury becomes toxic.

because peter is someone who inherently views himself as a follower.

lord voldemort would never - to borrow sirius' phrase - do something for someone else unless he could see what was in it for him. but voldemort's selfishness is because he sees himself as the unparalleled superior of everyone he meets - there's no need to help those under you if they're the only people who benefit!

peter's selfishness is slightly different - everything he does is in pursuit of vicarious glory. he wants to be praised and rewarded by a leader he's made more powerful. he doesn't want to be that leader himself.

peter the marauder

indeed, canon emphasises that this is what attracted him to james and sirius:

To Sirius' right stood Pettigrew, more than a head shorter, plump and watery-eyed, flushed with pleasure at his inclusion in this coolest of gangs, with the much-admired rebels that James and Sirius had been. [DH 10]

obviously this is harry's subjective view ["much-admired rebels" is a bit of a stretch, let's be real…], which the text does acknowledge ["or was it simply because harry knew how it had been, that he saw these things in the picture?"].

but harry's assessment of the teenage peter here matches the one we're given across the series:

"Pettigrew... that fat little boy who was always tagging around after them at Hogwarts?" said Madam Rosmerta. "Hero-worshipped Black and Potter," said Professor McGonagall. "Never quite in their league, talent-wise." [PoA 10]

James was still playing with the Snitch, letting it zoom farther and farther away, almost escaping but always grabbed at the last second. Wormtail was watching him with his mouth open. Every time James made a particularly difficult catch, Wormtail gasped and applauded. After five minutes of this, Harry wondered why James didn't tell Wormtail to get a grip on himself, but James seemed to be enjoying the attention. [OotP 28]

peter is set up as someone who's understood by everyone not to occupy the same role in society [both "society" as in the social ecosystem of hogwarts, and as in wizarding society more generally] as james and sirius.

this is almost certainly for class and blood-status related reasons - and hello to another anon on this point:

the fact that the only parent mentioned in the text is his mother strongly suggests that he's a half-blood with a muggle or muggleborn father [which his narrative parallels with snape, his narrative relationship with voldemort, and his narrative contrast with barty crouch jr. also support].

the way his mother is spoken about by other characters in prisoner of azkaban - especially fudge: "black was taken away by twenty members of the magical law enforcement squad and pettigrew received the order of merlin, first class, which i think was some comfort to his poor mother" [PoA 10] - sets her up as the passive figure in her relationship to the state [the ministry deigns to provide her with comfort], thus implying that she was ordinary, middle-class, and respectable, but lacked the class-based social power to occupy a more active role in the relationship.

[contrast her, for example, with someone like augusta longbottom, who is a much more active figure narratively.]

but she also can't come from a working-class background, because otherwise voldemort wouldn't seek to humiliate peter by making him live in snape's slum house as his servant.

but peter is also set up as someone who - while he accepts that james and sirius are his superiors and doesn't want to usurp their positions - nonetheless thinks that the two of them will do all they can to increase his chances of helping them accrue more glory, thus allowing the glory he shares in to be all the greater.

and why not? after all, he has plenty of evidence that they'd be capable of doing this, given the lengths they go to for remus…

i think he can be very easily understood as somebody who thinks that - once the three of them have nailed the animagus transformation and achieved their goal of supporting remus during the full moon - then the next thing on james and sirius' list of priorities is putting in a similar level of effort on his behalf.

indeed, the text does imply this - in snape's worst memory, peter goes from being positioned with remus as james and sirius' inferior:

Snape was on his feet again, and was stowing the O.W.L. paper in his bag. As he emerged from the shadows of the bushes and set off across the grass, Sirius and James stood up. Lupin and Wormtail remained sitting.

to being physically positioned with remus but clearly wanting to be an active member of james and sirius' shenanigans:

Lupin was still staring down at his book, though his eyes were not moving and a faint frown line had appeared between his eyebrows. Wormtail was looking from Sirius and James to Snape with a look of avid anticipation on his face. [...] Wormtail was on his feet now, watching hungrily, edging around Lupin to get a clearer view.

to physically joining - but still being excluded from equality of power with - james and sirius:

"How'd the exam go, Snivelly?" said James. "I was watching him, his nose was touching the parchment," said Sirius viciously. "There'll be great grease marks all over it, they won’t be able to read a word."   Several people watching laughed; Snape was clearly unpopular. Wormtail sniggered shrilly. 

to being positioned as sirius' equal under james' leadership:

"Well," said James, appearing to deliberate the point, "it's more the fact that he exists, if you know what I mean..." Many of the surrounding watchers laughed, Sirius and Wormtail included.

to being included as both james and sirius' equal:

But too late; Snape had directed his wand straight at James; there was a flash of light and a gash appeared on the side of James' face, spattering his robes with blood. James whirled about; a second flash of light later, Snape was hanging upside down in the air, his robes falling over his head to reveal skinny, pallid legs and a pair of greying underpants. Many people in the small crowd watching cheered. Sirius, James, and Wormtail roared with laughter. [OotP 28]

but this symbolic ascent towards james and sirius recognising and including him isn't what actually comes to pass, is it?

[and as a little shipping-related aside... this is an immaculate wormbucks or padtail premise.]

clearly, peter's experience from the beginning of his sixth year onwards [so from the autumn of 1976] is one in which his hero-worship of james and sirius [and it is just james and sirius - if he felt aggrieved enough by remus that he wanted to implicate him in the potters' deaths he absolutely could have done so] begins to crumble...

and then to fester...

until he's reached a point where the following isn't something he believes is actually true:

"THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE DIED!" roared Black. "DIED RATHER THAN BETRAY YOUR FRIENDS, AS WE WOULD HAVE DONE FOR YOU!" [PoA 19]

[this - as an aside - is one of the major differences between harry and james/sirius. harry's understanding of loyalty and sacrifice is much less transactional: "dumbledore knew, as voldemort knew, that harry would not let anyone else die for him now that he had discovered it was in his power to stop it" [DH 34].]

and decides that he should probably transfer his loyalties to the much bigger bully who's just arrived on the scene.

enter lord voldemort.

peter the death eater

while there are some key differences [peter is the one who has to approach voldemort, rather than the other way round, and - as i've said here - i think voldemort withholds the dark mark from him to keep him striving], peter's recruitment by the death eaters has a huge amount in common with draco malfoy's.

[more on which... here.]

voldemort must win him over by validating his belief that james and sirius [and also dumbledore/the order] don't take him and his talents seriously, that they need to be punished for this, and that when peter has humiliated them, he will have the time of his life basking in the glow of the victorious voldemort, who will also reward him spectacularly.

this is what voldemort does with quite a few of his minions - including regulus [another fantastic ship for peter], barty crouch jr. [likewise], and, of course, snape [which flops], all of whom have that corrosive perception of themselves as always being overlooked.

in the first war, then, voldemort must be pretty nice to him.

[or as nice as voldemort ever gets...]

the threats and the punishment come later.

[as another aside, the implication of canon is that voldemort's use of violence against his minions is relatively infrequent - and only used in specific circumstances - in the first war. the egregious torture he subjects them to in the second - and the fact that he does this publicly - shocks, terrifies, and humiliates even the most ardent first war loyalists. i think we can assume, then, that peter returned to voldemort expecting to find him in the same "you catch more flies with honey" mode as in the first war. he was mistaken.]

the contempt 90s!voldemort holds peter in is iconic - so many of his best lines are times he's mocking him!

but something which always stands out to me is that voldemort's contempt for peter is inextricably linked to his previous position as one of the four marauders.

[indeed, i find it fascinating that voldemort says that peter "faked his own death to escape justice" [GoF 33], because the only thing he can mean by "justice" in this context is that peter should have let sirius murder him...]

and the most explicit demonstration of this is the fact that he always calls him wormtail.

this is a fascinating twist on the way voldemort plays with the language of intimacy with his death eaters. his favourites get referred to by their given names, while the rest are referred to more formally, using their surnames:

"Severus, here," said Voldemort, indicating the seat on his immediate right. "Yaxley - beside Dolohov." [DH 1]

and, of course, his ultimate favourite gets referred to by her nickname.

but peter isn't being called wormtail by the dark lord as a show of affection... it's an expression of disregard.

it's clear that the voldemort of the second war deeply understands that peter's life between the potters' deaths and his unmasking at the end of prisoner of azkaban [that is, the period when he didn't get the glory he wanted, he just got a dead james, two friends who want to murder him, and a master who hates him] made him start to regret his resentment of james and sirius for not living up to the versions of themselves he'd invented in his head - especially following sirius' death, when he receives a second demonstration of voldemort's contempt for him, since the moment sirius is out of the picture, the dark lord declares him surplus to requirements and dumps him on snape.

voldemort also knows that peter can only suppress these regrets and pretend they don't exist for so long...

and so everything about their second war relationship is voldemort pre-empting a betrayal he knows will come, when peter's long-buried grief for his friends comes roaring back. hence him setting up peter's silver hand to kill him when his loyalty wavers.

or, more succinctly:

"You returned to me, not out of loyalty, but out of fear of your old friends. You deserve this pain, Wormtail. You know that, don't you?" [DH 33]

peter the [un]man

there's one final thing which i think is really interesting about peter's portrayal in the text, and that's his relationship with gender.

he's someone whose presentation as unmasculine is consistent across his appearances - and is consistently intended to be belittling. but he's also someone whose lack of masculinity is used both to underscore his villainy [and to emphasise that it's the worst type of villainy - to quote jkr, "i loathe a traitor"; peter is the most reprehensible villain in the doylist text's eyes] and to misdirect the reader away from it.

before he's unmasked at the end of prisoner of azkaban, peter is associated narratively with neville:

A hatred such as he had never known before was coursing through Harry like poison. He could see Black laughing at him through the darkness, as though somebody had pasted the picture from the album over his eyes. He watched, as though somebody was playing him a piece of film, Sirius Black blasting Peter Pettigrew (who resembled Neville Longbottom) into a thousand pieces. [PoA 11]

and - therefore - is associated with a lack of masculinity in a fond way. neville is a character the reader is supposed to like, but not a character the reader is supposed to aspire to be like.

the text uses both peter and neville's appearance - especially the fact that both of them are noted to be fat [neville gets described as "plump", which is understood as slightly more polite, but the meaning is the same...] - to emphasise this. they're soft and shy and unsporty. they're passive, in contrast to harry [and james'] masculine vigour. they're both followers, but in a good way.

or, they both occupy the role female characters tend to: conduits for the male characters' deeds and desires, but lacking the agency to have deeds and desires of their own.

[hence why i am extremely compelled by @whinlatter's theory that the best lightning-gen parallel for peter is ginny...]

this is the tone of the secret keeper swap. peter is chosen by james and sirius precisely because they understand him as a vessel. he can contain and surround and envelope the potters and keep them safe that way, while sirius - who embodies the active qualities of a masculine protector - protects them by fighting and running and being hunted.

but - of course - peter doesn't perform this feminine protector role. he corrupts it. and this another way the text underscores that he's its worst villain... he bastardises a role typically associated with motherhood.

he and sirius are set up narratively as the parallel to james and lily: sirius is the masculine figure, the father, the "take harry and run"; peter is the feminine, the mother, the "refuses to stand aside".

once peter is unmasked at the end of prisoner of azkaban and his corruption of his maternal role is revealed, the text's presentation of his unmanliness then becomes something used to emphasise how vile and creepy the reader is supposed to find him.

it does this while maintaining the corrupted motherhood metaphor - hence him having to nurse voldemort's pseudo-infant form in goblet of fire, and hence him being positioned as inferior to barty crouch jr., who joins voldemort and peter, his "wife", to take the narrative role of voldemort's son and heir.

this is extremely interesting, since the text typically uses a lack of maternal or pseudo-maternal experience to indicate that its female villains [especially bellatrix and umbridge] are to be understood as villains by the reader. the exceptions, petunia dursley and walburga black, are fascinating parallels for peter, given the way that they also embody the corrosiveness of resentment and the impact it has on truly being able to grieve.

but peter also becomes a second, specific form of unman once he's unmasked...

the eunuch.

it's really striking that - from the latter chapters of prisoner of azkaban onwards - peter is frequently associated with the theme of voyeurism:

But Ron was staring at Pettigrew with the utmost revulsion. "I let you sleep in my bed," he said. [PoA 19]

Snape held up a hand to stop her, then pointed his wand again at the concealed staircase door. There was a loud bang and a squeal, followed by the sound of Wormtail scurrying back up the stairs. "My apologies," said Snape. "He has lately taken to listening at doors, I don't know what he means by it." [HBP 2]

the sexual undertone to these associations is really significant, because - when combined with the presentation of peter as a follower/an outsider looking in and with the presentation of him as lacking in virility - it renders him sexless, but in a specifically jealous way. he's not voldemort, whose canon presentation as aromantic is used to underscore his villainy by implying there's something "wrong" with him... he's someone who should have been able to access the "normal" structures of love and family, but who has self-castrated himself from this "normality" due to his corruption arc, and who is forced to watch from the sidelines coveting what others have and regretting his decisions and loathing himself.

[hence my absolute conviction that the reason he's not at home on halloween 1981, when sirius goes to check on him and finds his safe-house empty, is because he's snuck into the potters' house in rat form to watch james and lily be murdered...]

and this idea of peter as somebody unsexed or castrated is really interesting as a lens to examine one of his most sinister moments - his role in the torture and murder of bertha jorkins.

nb: there is a discussion of rape in what follows.

i liked this post by @pangaeaseas - and the discussion in the notes -about voldemort's treatment of peter surrounding his capture of bertha jorkins. but i thought it was interesting how a lot of this discussion focused on the ways voldemort is insulting peter's intellect in this context... and not the ways he's attacking his sexual prowess.

the text is pretty clear - not least in the enormous victim-blaming undertone to the way many characters [especially male ones] talk about bertha's disappearance - that peter brought bertha to voldemort after convincing her that he wanted to engage in some form of consensual sexual encounter [described by voldemort, in pg-13 terms, as a "nighttime stroll"]. voldemort's astonishment at peter managing to accomplish this isn't so much him being shocked that he had the way with words/quick thinking abilities to talk bertha into going with him, it's him being shocked that someone he considers to be so unmanly as to be impotent managed to pull.

and then - it is heavily implied, both in the text itself and in jkr's statements since publication that her editor looked like she wanted to be sick when she described how voldemort was restored to a rudimentary body - to rape:

"He was the penis able-bodied servant I needed, and, eunuch poor wizard though he is, Wormtail was able to violate a woman follow the instructions I gave him, which would return me to a rudimentary, weak body of my own, a body I would be able to inhabit while awaiting the essential ingredients for true rebirth." [GoF 33]

[novelistwriter]

The Boy who Lived and the King

DP x HP Prompt inspired by other works like Half Dead Phoenix and another where Danny is a Professor at Hogwarts ( I also want a Harry Potter story where most of the beloved characters have a happy end except Umbridge, fuck her)

Danny had run away from his home, his parents had found out about him being Phantom and had rejected him. Then he was being hunted by the GIW after his parents told them about him. He fled America altogether, flying all the way to Britain because Clockwork sent him a message that he would find another family there that would accept him no matter what.

When he got there, he arrived near Hogwarts, where he met a boy named James Potter, who was an arrogant boy and sometimes bullied others. He was more friends with Lily Evans and Severus Snape. Danny's influence caused James to change earlier than his 7th year, which also caused both James and Lily to begin dating earlier as well. After James and Lily began to date, Danny became friends with Sirius Black.

During the years James, Lily, Severus, and Sirius were in Hogwarts, Danny had accepted his role as the Ghost King, and found a mother figure in Minerva McGonagall.

Danny is there to the wedding between James and Lily, but Sirius remains the best man to James and the Godfather to Harry, Danny is fine with being the cool uncle.

And then James and Lily are killed by Voldemort, and Sirius was framed for it. Danny is trusted by Dumbledore to take care of Harry. He is happy to be raising his nephew, but he has plans to take down Voldemort, clear Sirius' name, and search for the Ghosts of James and Lily.

(Honestly, I'd like to see who Harry would end up with if someone took this up. Personally, I have been drawn to Drarry. I have also been slightly interested in seeing Harry with Cedric, Ron, or Hermione, but don't let my opinions dictate the way the story would go if you decide to take this up)

[maxdibert]

In the books, Snape is too emotional to be a spy... We see him get angry, blush, and turn pale. In the films he is 25 years older. Snape is still a young man who did not live to see 40.. He is very emotional in the books.

Severus is emotional when something triggers him, and what triggers him are precisely the things that point to his inner child: the part of him that never grew up and remains stuck. Talking to Harry triggers him because he’s not seeing Harry, he’s seeing James, his lifelong bully, the guy who stripped him in front of the whole school and made his life miserable. But he’s not equally emotional with Ron or Hermione because they don’t have that effect on him. He’s also not as emotional with Neville—even though Neville drives him up the wall—because finding someone unbearable is not the same as being forced to relive your unresolved trauma over and over again.

That’s why he can keep up his façade effortlessly around people like Umbridge, Fudge, McGonagall, or even Dumbledore, but the moment Sirius opens his mouth—or even just breathes within ten meters of him—he turns into a rabid cat. It’s not that he can’t control himself; it’s that Sirius is part of his trauma. Outside of those triggers, he is a highly competent person who actually commands a great deal of respect—or fear, depending on how you see it—among his students.

He is a top-tier Occlumens, capable of blocking a Legilimency genius like Voldemort, yet he completely loses his composure the moment something makes him forget he’s an adult and drags him back to feeling like the abused, ostracized, and lost teenager he once was. And that’s one of the most fascinating dualities of his character: he can be incredibly serious, competent, and an excellent spy, but the moment something reignites the ghosts of his past, he snaps.

And it’s interesting because it’s deeply realistic: it perfectly portrays what it’s like to be an adult with severe past trauma that has been forcibly repressed but never truly worked through or healed. It’s like a wound that never properly closed: if you don’t touch it, nothing happens, and you can live a normal life. But the moment something brushes against it, it starts bleeding again, and there’s nothing you can do to stop it.

[beware-of-pity]

Cinnamon Girl - I

Masterlist I Ao3 link I Prologue - Chapter two

Harry James Potter x Reader

Summary :

Dreams we can’t remember are reality that we crave

Chapter I: Oh, who is she? (A misty memory, a haunting face)

. ⚯ ͛

Dreams, such a fickle thing they are. Up until three years ago, Harry thought dreams could only be that, mere dreams. No more realer than the idea of Ron finally confessing his feelings for Hermione. Unimaginable things, those were what he believed them to be.

However, by his fourth year, everything had changed.

He believed his vision of Barty Crouch Jr., whose identity he did not recognise, accepting his new mission from the considerably weaker Dark Lord was simply a terrible nightmare.

He simmered over it all summer; he spoke of it to very few, and no one had proved helpful in clearing his mind of the doubt it lingered with. Until he had watched the very same man be exposed for the snake he was, in one of Dumbledore's memories, swimming in the pensive which he had stumbled upon. The moment it was revealed by Igor Karkaroff that Barty Jr was a death eater doing the Dark Lord’s dirty deeds and that he had a hand in the capture and torture of Neville’s parents, he knew then that that dream was no dream but rather reality, a passive memory that someone had witnessed.

Since then, he has rarely experienced peaceful nights as he once had. His scar would throb all the same, the burning sensation of the scarred flesh on his forehead intensifying the pain caused by the visions he was forced to endure by his other half. Last year, they had nearly driven him mad, reaching levels of exasperation he had not known until then. When he was made to watch that serpent attack Mr Weasley at the Ministry, it all culminated in his breaking point.  He was handled like a fragile, overfilled, vase about to break— pale and scared out of his mind he was, and probably looked the part.

The reality into which his dreams had twisted was the cataclysms that led him to believe that Sirius was indeed being tortured by Voldemort, as well. But he wasn’t, and he paid the price of believing so first-hand.

The isolation he endured because people refused to believe that Voldemort was back, the judgmental glances that his defensive behaviour got him, the murmurs and whispers following him along the halls he walked in loneliness. Everything was too much for him to handle, to the point where everything could get the best of him and lead his senses astray. That was his plan all along. He realised too late. He wishes he could go back and tell himself not to listen to what was meticulously presented as the perfect bait for the taking.

The moment he snapped, everyone around him became aware of his predicament.

Everything about him could never remain a secret, nothing of his could ever be privy to his persona. Somehow, everyone had to know, either for their protection, to get further help, or they found out in the worst of times. Nothing of Harry could truly be his and his alone.

His life was not his; he had to share it with the man who had killed his parents so he could kill him, too.

How tiresome it could get to be him. There were times when Harry wished he was anyone but Harry, that he could, one day, get to live a life that was his own, of his design, one of his choosing. His life had been so hectic, so chaotic, so all over the place, that were it up to him, he would choose a calm, quiet life, a domestic one, filled with the people he cared about most, with those he loved most, where the light shines bright in the sky and where darkness did not exist. Where he was content, and no trouble would find him. Where he could do as he pleased, walk where he pleased, breathe the open air. 

Think, sleep, and dream freely without worrying about his mind being filled by some unknown entity.

He had tried to struggle against whoever was trying their hand at entering his mind, a fight for dominance he realised much too soon that he could not.

His hands were tied, his resistance not strong enough. His adversary was leagues ahead of him in this department, someone with much greater experience.

But strangely, or thankfully enough, they had not proved a threat to him, for now at least. That did not mean he enjoyed their presence, flanking about his mind. Memories of all the unpleasant times he’d been unable to withstand Professor Snape’s violation of his mind for him to grow stronger against the Dark Lord were just as reminiscent of what he was enduring now. What the man had taught him seemed to not work this time.

The mind and the dreams filling it were two different things, forecast by his senses, senses he had no control over, therefore, whilst he could counter at times, by sheer luck, the legimency spell, he could not, to his misfortune, counter back whatever this natural state he fell to was.

He did not possess neither the instruments nor the mastery on how to handle such a thing.

Nonetheless, the first time he had felt the gushing forth of another presence in his mind had not been a pleasant ordeal.

He had been able to catch only a brief sight before he woke in a cold sweat; his shirt dumped around the collar from both the nightly summer heat and his body having a natural, convulsing reaction to him trying to get as far away from his dreamland the instant he realised what was happening. That time, he’d been able to escape the imminent, the second, he had not been so fortunate.

He had practically fallen off the bed, waking Ron in a frenzied startle, who was sleeping in the corner beside him, making him jump out of his wits. He had stood from the floor, with his head convulsing in pain from the hit he got the moment he met the floor and his stomach churning from the sudden fall. He must have been trashing in his sleep, and as panic rippled through him as he felt a shuddering breath run at the nape of his neck as he urged to pull away from the avalanche coming his way, he must have also flipped himself off the comfort of his bed.

"You look like hell." Ron had pointed out one of those mornings after, at the breakfast table, snapping Harry out of his silent thoughts. Ron glances at him over the cup of orange juice he held up in his face to sip.

Harry shook his head "i'm fine," he said "It's just the hìeat”

“Yeah, the heat” replied Ron, not at all convinced by Harry reasoning for looking like crap.

"You know you can tell us if something’s wrong, Harry," reassured Hermione, from where she sat beside Ron. Ginny, who sat beside Harry, eyed him curiously, but she, too, was concerned about the way he was continuously spacing out of reality and into his mind.

Ron nodded in agreement. "Yeah, mate. We're here for you.”

“I know, guys, but I’m fine,” he said as he grabbed his fork to indulge in the food that had gone too long untouched. Ron and Hermione look at each other with the same understanding of the situation.

Alas, perhaps pushed by his curiosity, on his fifth or so night, he wasn’t sure, he had stopped counting a long time ago, of restlessness, he had decided to be the brave Gryffindor he was supposed to be and face whatever entered his mind at the darkest times of the night and the deepest hour of his sleep. He had faced worse things in the years since he had begun attending Hogwarts, what could be the worst that could happen to him?

Usually, each night, as a lump rose his troath, the fog in his mind became thicker, and his body convulsed slightly, twitching as if he were a ferret, and then he would wake. This time, it would wait it out, awaiting that which he had begun to fear.

And there he found himself, with nothing but darkness surrounding him. No one in sight, but he knew they were there — they always were, the shadows enjoying themselves as they chuckled and murmured to themselves, watching him as if he were a prey ready for the taking.

But, even as his heartbeat to a pace it only did when the worst circumstances presented themselves to him, Harry wasn’t met with horrible visions of the times that pained him most or with images of the dark doings of his other half —rather, little balls of light, white and as pure as freshly laid snow on a cold winter morning at dawn, flocked around him, one by one, attaching themselves to his body, in all places, as they ‘helped’ him through the darkness and vastness that succumbed this strange place he found himself in. They tugged, pulled, the force being their actions stronger than he thought them possible.

He did not know where they were taking him. Despite this, the warmth the balls of fuzz emanated around his skin had an almost soothing effect on him.

He tested how far he could go with them when he tried to touch one, but the vibration it emitted, caused by the strong energy inside it, did not permit him to get too close to its core. Harry’s feet slushed through the apparent dark waters he had sunk into, sometimes stumbling into nothing at all, as his senses began to grow weary of the journey he was being taken on. The cold seeped at him through the freezing waves entering the palm of his feet that felt almost chilling at the contrast it created with the warmth of these little creatures, surrounding him like the gentle embrace of an old friend.

At the end of the tunnel of darkness, he found the light he’d hoped to meet.

The one that would keep him safe from the murky gloom that had led his senses astray. The same warmth those creatures stuck to his skin emitted blinded him. It was calling him to approach, beckoning to be followed.

He was safe.

Waiting for him there, there was no darkness. No shadows of the past, no pain, no ghosts coming back to haunt him. No, instead, staring back at him, standing in the light, there they were, his parents, James and Lily Potter, looking as young as the day they were killed, healthy and unmarred. They smiled, waving to him warmly and invitingly.

He could hear his mother calling his name, smiling the same way she did in those photos he spent countless nights flipping over. However, her voice was distant, far away, static, and muffled as it reverbed through the hall of light they were standing in and into his body.

Nonetheless, he could feel the sweetness and melody of it. He stumbled as his feet began to charge him forward.

“Mum” he whispered, his eyes wide in disbelief.

The voice grew louder, beckoning him forward. They were waiting for him, after all, and they didn’t have much time. Lily called once more, her voice clearer now, her tone of voice urgent. "Harry, come here."

James was also waiting for him, standing beside Lily and looking just as young and handsome as his wife. "come to us, my boy”

"Mum, Dad," his feet rushed him forward against the protest his mind urged him to listen to. This could be a trap, well planned by whoever was entering his mind to trick him. But Harry had thrown all caution out the window the moment his eyes seared the figure of his parents standing before him.

Both James and Lily had wide smiles on their faces as they watched Harry approaching them. James held his arms open wide by the minute as Harry grew closer.

"Harry." They called together.

He crushes into their awaiting arms, clinging to their form like a lifeline, as if the moment would end soon. He knew that regardless of whatever this way, he didn’t have much time with them, and he wanted to savour all the time he would be given.

James held him close, pressing his cheek against Harry's hair. "We're so happy to see you." Lily pulled him into her arms, kissing the top of his head.

He had grown so much since he had begun his journey at Hogwarts; he had been dealt a hand in so many tribulations that no one before him had ever had to, and yet no matter how stronger or weaker he grew, how older and wiser he became, he was still a boy, who missed the parents he had never got to know, the ones he wishes he had, those that had died when he was just a baby. The man and woman he wished been there to raise him instead of the Dursdley, the two most important people in the world that he knew would have raised him with love, would have never had him want for nothing and would not have made him sleep under the cupboard beneath stairs. The ones that would have never hidden the existence of magic from him, that would have introduced the world they were well known in ever since he could talk, where he could have thrived even more under their guidance.

James chuckled, shaking his head as Harry sobbed. "Oh, you're all grown up now, aren't you? So much older." He said, looking Harry up and down. James stroked Harry's hair lovingly as he held him. "We've missed you so much." Lily buried her face into the crook of Harry's neck.

There was a moment of peace as the three of them embraced, a peace Harry was unfamiliar with, but one he wished he could always have. James eventually pulled back to look at Harry.

"We're so proud of you.”

"We always have been." Lily chimed in.

"You've accomplished so much," James said a proud smile on his face.

"Not enough" Harry crocked "I still have to.... fight and defeat him," he said "I have to avenge you two”

"You can do it, son," James said softly.

"You're a strong boy," Lily added, patting his shoulder. “We’ll always be beside you, Harry. Remember you’re not alone”

The reassurance of his parents felt like a balm soothing the ache his soul had been carrying ever since the events that scarred the end of his fifth school year. The hard knot in his troath clenches around the soft flesh, and he tries to gulp it down. He smiles at them, but it’s a smile that carries along the pain that he always tries to shield others from. The one he feels he has to carry to protect others from the cause of his pain.

Lily, ever the intuitive one, smiles in turn, noticing the pain behind her son’s smile.

“It’s okay to feel pain,” she told him." but you must not pain yourself any further than you're already been, baby”

"We don't want to see you hurting" James added, rubbing at Harry's back gently, "let it hurt, that's okay, but don't bury it inside.”

"Feel your pain, but don't let yourself drown in it" Lily instructed. “Make it your own, master it, and wield it against those that have hurt you”

With each reassurance, Harry began to feel his parents slipping from his grip, their once clear and homogenous forms beginning to fade, turning ghastly white, almost transparent beings he could see through.  He knew he would wake soon.

"We love you," Lily said, "remember that always.”

"no" he murmured shaking his head "No, don't go!" his tone held the urgency of the adrenaline pumping through his body as he felt his parents slip away from him.

"You have to let go, Harry," the regret in his father’s voice was strong. No parent would wish to see their child in such a state of distress.

"We have to leave," Lily said, her voice laced with sorrow. “but she will bring us back to you, don't worry”

Harry wanted to ask, to question, to plead with his mother for the meaning of her words. He wanted more time; he deserved more time. Was it so bad for him to ask? Why had life been so unfair to him? What had he ever done to deserve such a thing?  And who is 'she'? What did his mother mean that 'she' would bring them back?

"Trust us, sweetheart," James said, pressing a kiss to Harry's head. "She will take care of you”

"She will look after you, I promise," Lily assured her son. "just, don't fight her, let her into your mind” “She means no harm” reassured James “Trust us, Harry”

“Now, wake up”

Harry's eyes snapped open in a frenzy, his breath growing rugged with each broken breath that left the confines of his ribcage. His sight was a blurry mess of smudged blotches of colours that ran his mind wild. The images of his mother and father faded, to be replaced only by the light coming from the lining window atop his bed. The pain in his chest, however, still lingered. The warmth from the light had disappeared, and only the cold of the night remained, despite it being morning. He ran a hand over his face, wiping away the sweat that had drizzled down his temple as he slept, while his other reached for the nightstand for his glasses.

Once on his face once more, he squints at the suddenness of the light from the window. The sun looked too high for it to be early morning and the fact that Ron’s bed was empty of his presence and even made, a feat most time he was reprimanded for not doing, meant that he had overslept.

“Blimey, Harry” he heard a voice comment from the doorway, etched in concern and a hint of judgment. He must look a mess with the way that Ron’s eyebrows were raised and the slight shock that crossed his face. To say that the sight weirded out Ron would dismiss the fact that this would not have been the first time Ron had seen Harry this way, which it wasn’t, but Ron also didn’t make it a habit to get used to it.

“What time is it?” Harry stammered as he composed himself.

“It’s well past eleven” blurted Ron “didn’t want to wake you cause I know you haven’t been sleeping well, but when both mum and Hermione said you had not come down even after me and Ginny had finished training, I got worried and came to make sure you hadn’t somehow died in your sleep”

“Well, I’m happy to tell you that I’m still alive” Harry felt sticky, both his shirt and pyjama pants were slicked to his form in a way that made his wiggle in place once he stood from his bed.

“And, sorry about training, I should have been there”

“Oh forget about it,” dismissed Ron “Don’t think I’ll improve enough for the tryouts anyways, with you or not training me”

“That’s not true,” Harry chided back “I’m sure there’s nothing that a little more training can’t fix” Harry felt Ron look away from him as a blush began creeping up his neck. Harry could tell there was more on his mind.

"Are you okay?”

"i'll make a fool of myself" Ron whimpered in exasperation "I won't make it, and even if I do, I don't think I could get either myself or the broom on the pitch in my first match”

He tried, he really did, to hide the laugh that threatened to escape his lips, but the image of the time when Fred and George had enchanted a Quaffle bounced off of his head, was too clear in his mind for him not to find amusement as it reenacted in his head. Ron, however, didn’t find any amusement whatsoever, even if his own face tried not to break into a sheepish grin.

“You’ll do great,” Harry said, smiling at Ron. “You always do.”

“Like hell, I will!" Ron cried out "I heard Cormac is going for Keeper as well. How can I compare to Cormac of all people? Have you seen him? The guy's the size of a wardrobe!”

“So?” Harry replied, raising an eyebrow as he leaned against the doorframe with a smile on his face. “Cormac is also a bit of a prat.” He said playfully.

"as long as he keeps the quaffle out of the rings, who cares about how much of a twat he is!”

“The team will care,” Harry sighed “You can’t have a keeper that can’t keep the team together,” At Ron’s raised eyebrows, he added. “I don’t mean physically. Besides, Cormac is a hot-head, you can’t expect him to be able to control his temper when playing against a team like Slytherin who won’t play nice”

Harry knew he wouldn't be able to convince Ron anytime soon. Anxiety coursed through his body, travelling along the vein connecting his foot to his brain. Moreover, Harry wasn't particularly concerned about persuading Ron; he understood Ron's strengths and where his weaknesses lay, and as long as he put in his best effort, he could prove to be a convincing beater. He would just need to calm himself for that to happen… an impossible feat for Ron to achieve.

He also had other things to worry about, like the dream he had just woken from.

Ron’s expression relaxed as he stood. "C'mon, you need a bath, mate,” he said with a cheeky smile, adding swiftly, "You stink,” which earned him a playful hit on the shoulder.

“You cheeky slit” murmured Harry “I'll meet you there in a bit,”. He shook his head. He needed a bath right now.

A cold one.

[newtiecookie]

HARRY POTTER HOT TAKES

TBH I miss jily and all the sunshine gryffindor vibes. When did we start to romanticize death eaters like evan rosier and barty crouch like NOT EVERYONE HAS A TRAGIC BACKSTORY SOME OF THEM ARE JUST EVIL. I loveee regulus with all my heart but I absolutely DESPISE jegulus. Like did y'all forget james potter was the no.1 slytherin hater?!

Also I have a bone to pick with people who write jegulus fanfics with LILY SLANDER and WHERE JAMES CHEATS ON HER (I'm coming for yall)

DRACO WAS NOT A TRAUMATIZED LITTLE BABY HE WAS A SPOILED BRAT. He's definitely not better than harry or ron in any way possible. He did not have trauma. And don't even begin to whine about him having a sadder life than harry. FYI harry was orphaned and abused by the dursleys only to come into the Wizarding world and be exploited by Dumbledore and the ministry.

I HATE DRAMIONE/HARIMIONE. That's it. Stop it.

Snape was not a good person and neither was Dumbledore. Snape did not love Lily, he was obsessed with her. Like did everyone forget that he wanted to kill james and harry just so that Lily could be widowed for him? He chose to spy for Dumbledore because it was a safe and comfortable job. Dumbledore literally saved Snape from going to Azkaban and (edits cuz im in doubt) snape also wanted Dumbledore to fire remus because of his ongoing desire to expose remus' secret despite him literally taking snapes side in hbp. " For the greater good" true, but i will forever loathe them.

[hollowed-theory-hall]

Hello!! So, I saw an argument about Harry's uhm looks? I guess. A lot of people basically headcanon him as someone buff. I digress, I'm part of the uhm more realistic? group. Harry's been starved and abused his entire life. I doubt he'll gain the weight and the height everyone else wants him to have. Years later. maybe. But in 6th year? While on the run? 3 years after the war? Doubt. do you think he would be able to get super tall and buff? Also, do you think its possible he used the same methods the dursleys used to punish himself?

I mean, anyone can headcanon whatever they want, but, I'll try to explain via quotes, what Harry's height and muscle situation is likely to be. I believe the reasons some headcanon him as buff and tall are:

Harry had pinned Mundungus against the wall of the pub by the throat. Holding him fast with one hand, he pulled out his wand.

(HBP)

He lifts Mundungus by his throat with one hand easily, and he practices Quidditch like 3 times a week at least. This implies that Harry has some muscle on him.

And he's mentioned to be James' height when he's 17:

James was exactly the same height as Harry.

(DH)

Which was supposedly tall, according to both, Harry:

tall and untidy-haired like Harry, the smoky, shadowy form of James Potter

(GoF)

And Voldemort:

the tall black-haired man in his glasses

(DH)

Now, let's put Harry's height in the context of other character heights. Particularly of interest are characters taller than him, to get an image of how tall is "tall." And some shorter characters to help figure out his exact height.

Sirius, Ron, Voldemort, and Dumbledore are all taller than Harry and exceptionally tall in general. They are each likely to be over 6 feet tall, making Harry likely less than 6' (183 cm). Supporting this is this quote:

Once the painful transformation was complete he was more than six feet tall, and from what he could tell from his well-muscled arms, powerfully built.

(DH)

This means Harry is less than 6' and isn't super buff. But, I want to get to his specific height, because I have a lot to say about character heights.

Like, Dumbledore is probably the tallest character who isn't a half-giant because he's towering over everyone except Hagrid and Maxime. In book 6, he's literally taller than all the inferi in the cave:

Dumbledore was on his feet again, pale as any of the surrounding Inferi, but taller than any too,

(HBP)

And Abeforth (who's as tall as Dumbledore) is taller than Ron, who's one of the other tallest characters in the books:

Ron looked slightly sick. Aberforth stood up, tall as Albus, and suddenly terrible in his anger and the intensity of his pain.

(DH)

Making the Dumbledores really tall. My estimate is around a whooping 6'5 (195 cm).

Sirius is mentioned to be taller than Snape, and the tallest Marauder:

said Sirius, standing up. He was rather taller than Snape

(OotP)

To Sirius’s right stood Pettigrew, more than a head shorter

(DH)

A head, in height, should be around one foot (30.48 cm). As the average height of a man in England in 1998 was around 5'8 (174.4 cm), this would make Sirius around 6'2 (188 cm), therefore taller than average, and Pettigrew around 5'2 (157 cm), shorter than the average, but still both at a reasonable height.

Ron is almost as tall as the twins at 11:

“Shut up,” said Ron again. He was almost as tall as the twins already and his nose was still pink where his mother had rubbed it.

(PS)

And, just, really tall in general:

He stepped forward. Not as tall as Ron, he had to crane his neck to read the yellowish label affixed to the shelf right beneath the dusty glass ball.

(OotP)

So I estimate Ron at around 6'3 (190 cm).

Voldemort who grew up on war rations is still described very consistently as tall, regardless of childhood malnourishment:

He was his handsome father in miniature, tall for eleven years old, dark-haired, and pale

(HBP)

tall, pale, dark-haired, and handsome — the teenage Voldemort.

(HBP)

Taller than Bellatrix (who's taller than Harry). Voldemort is also considerably taller than Pettigrew, as he has to bend to reach Pettigrew's arm when both are standing:

Voldemort bent down and pulled out Wormtail’s left arm; he forced the sleeve of Wormtail’s robes up past his elbow

(GoF)

I usually place Voldemort at around the same height as Ron, so 6'3 (190 cm).

Fred and George, though, are mentioned to be shorter and stockier, more similar to Molly's build:

Charlie was built like the twins, shorter and stockier than Percy and Ron, who were both long and lanky.

(GoF)

but are mentioned to shrink to become Harry in book 7:

Hermione and Mundungus were shooting upward; Ron, Fred, and George were shrinking

(DH)

I actually place the twins around 6' (183 cm) so they could be taller than Harry, but shorter than Ron. The twins are likely taller than Charlie.

Bellatrix, as a woman, should also be shorter on average, but considering how tall Sirius is mentioned to be, it appears the Blacks are just considerably taller than the average, even the women:

a tall dark woman with heavy-lidded eyes, who had stood at her trial and proclaimed her continuing allegiance to Lord Voldemort

(OotP)

She was taller than he was, her long black hair rippling down her back, her heavily lidded eyes disdainful as they rested upon him;

(DH)

So I place her at around 6' (183 cm) as well, as an exceptionally tall lady.

So where does this place Harry?

During the first 4 books, Harry is short and small for his age. When he's 13, he and Hermione are bit shorter than Pettigrew:

He was a very short man, hardly taller than Harry and Hermione.

(PoA)

(Ron, noticeably, is taller than Pettigrew at 13)

So, so Harry at 13 was around 5'1 (155 cm). And so was Hermione.

Then in between books 4 and 5 puberty kicks in and probably causes a slight growth spurt that makes him more attractive to girls around him:

He was a skinny, black-haired, bespectacled boy who had the pinched, slightly unhealthy look of someone who has grown a lot in a short space of time.

(OotP)

Parvati Patil and Lavender Brown, the last two of whom gave Harry airy, overly friendly greetings that made him quite sure they had stopped talking about him a split second before. He had more important things to worry about, however:

(OotP)

And then he has another, larger growth spurt between books 5 and 6:

“You’re like Ron,” she [Molly] sighed, looking him up and down. “Both of you look as though you’ve had Stretching Jinxes put on you. I swear Ron’s grown four inches since I last bought him school robes.

(HBP)

“And it doesn’t hurt that you’ve grown about a foot over the summer either,” Hermione finished, ignoring Ron. “I’m tall,” said Ron inconsequentially. [Ron is objectively correct]

(HBP)

Post book 6 growth spurt, we know Harry is below 6' (183 cm) but close enough to 6' to be above the average of 5'8 (174.4 cm) and be considered "tall", and grow "about a foot" after said growth spurt.

I personally place his height at 5'11 (180 cm), to make all of the above make sense.

And while he is physically fit, he is likely very thin from years of malnourishment. So, he likely has some muscle on him, but he's very lean with little to no fat during his Hogwarts years (he'd likely gain more weight as an adult living peacefully with regular meals). So, Harry in the books isn't what I'd call buff, but he has some muscle and can definitely throw a punch. As he grows older post-canon, I think he could get buff if he set his mind to it.

(I actually have notes about the height of a bunch of other characters. Hermione is shorter than Harry and Ron, but noticeably taller than Ginny (5'1 or 155 cm - edited Ginny's height since I think she's shorter than the former estimate of 5'2. Bellatrix says “Very well — take the smallest one,” with Hermione and Luna (who's also short) present, so Ginny is really short) and probably around 5'4 (162 cm) by book 7. Draco is said to be slightly taller than Harry "Harry did not dare look directly at Draco, but saw him obliquely; a figure slightly taller than he was" - DH, placing Draco at around 6' (183 cm))

For your other question, no, I don't think Harry self-harms, definitely not in any way related to the Dursleys, but that's a different post because I went off about heights.