#Fidgeting

[buggertkle]

Day 7 fidget

Sorry this took so long I lost my art pen so I finally got a new one so here we are I’ll be playing catch up today and hopefully be done by tomorrow

[stimboardboy]

soft drink fidget toy

[andresmounts2]

Friendly reminder that it's okay to stim.

It's okay to feel uncomfortable or overwhelmed and need to stim in public.

It's okay if you're really bored and antsy and need to stim in public.

It's okay if you need to excuse yourself and go stim alone for a couple of minutes.

It's okay if you can't sit still at all and you're constantly moving.

It's okay if your stims are "loud" and (or) "annoying" to other people.

It's okay if you don't stim like neurotypical people.

It's okay if you don't stim like other neurodivergent people.

It's okay to stim in the way that helps you regulate yourself.

[sewooonz]

✰ yechan fidgeting with a water bottle

[thatadhdmood]

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A post shared by umiaire (@umiaire)

Cool wire wrapped fidget cube this creator made for fun

[simcha-is-a-mitzvah]

My Magen David necklace is really useful to stim and fidget with, that helps keep me happy and calm

Neurodivergent Jews unite!!

[talos-stims]

fidget chain. chain to fidget with. love it a lot | my video, link back here if using

[thataaabattery]

Renga HCs & more

-Langa has a necklace from Reki with the infinity symbol and Reki has a bracelet with the same. -Langa likes to fidget with it as he goes about his day and so does Reki.

-Langa noticed Reki always ruining his hoodie strings and gifted Reki a chewable fidget necklace.

-Reki tends to fidget with Langa’s things- including his watch at lunch. Langa just finds it amusing and funny.

-Autistic Langa & Audhd or Adhd Reki

Impulsive oneshot kinda:

“Just a few words”

One day Langa stares intensely at Reki’s headband with curiosity, wanting to touch it. Reki knows he wants something just doesn’t know what. So, he has them stop their skating a moment to inquire. Langa replies in his quiet and usual tone, “I want to fidget with you.” Then, looks up from the skateboard. Reki’s face blooms red, “I-I mean if.. you’re sure?” He rubs his neck a bit in embarrassment. ‘Does he mean like play with my hair or fingers?’

Langa’s head tilts. ‘Reki always fidgets with my stuff, what’s different now? Is my Japanese incorrect? How could Reki misunderstand? And why is he so red?’

“I’m sure.” Langa replies, looking Reki in the eye, seeming to long for the headband like a lost puppy.

For Reki, who thought differently of Langa’s words, he blushes furiously before huffing, “Jeez, you’re so.. embarrassing about this stuff, dude.” Then shakes his head. Langa should just ask if he wanted to hug. Did he want to cuddle or something? Why is Reki the one who has to guess? “Fine. I guess.” He says, although his voice comes out far too soft.

Langa’s eyes light up as he steps forward. Reki lifts open his arms and closes his eyes… only to find that Langa while having stepped closer, now has his hands around Reki’s headband. ‘He isn’t..’

Reki is utterly embarrassed at this point and decides to push it off like he was stretching. But before he can do so, Langa wraps his arms around Reki in return, chuckling at the yawn Reki had let out.

“You’re so cute.” Langa says quietly. Reki let’s his head fall on to Langa’s chest to hide his blushing. “S-shut up.” This only furthers Langa in his quieted laughs.

Langa feels the texture of the headband, taking note of it’s softened edges. The design is stitched with patchwork so utterly Reki that he can’t help but smile at. He then wraps it around his wrist, feeling perfectly snug. A part of him wants to see how Reki would look with the headband pushing all the hair from his face but he doesn’t want to overwhelm Reki. ‘God. He’d be adorable.’

With Langa’s abrupt quietness, Reki ultimately get’s curious and looks up. To his surprise, Langa is smiling. A smile that feels like a rare bliss or treasure, especially when he knows it’s because of him.

Reki shifts his head back down as Langa’s chin falls to rest on Reki. They sink into each other’s warmth and comfort, hearts pounding in their ears. Langa strokes a hand through Reki’s hair, playing with it and feeling enamored by the curls and their softness.

“Thanks” Langa says softly while he looks down. Reki just nods, hiding his head in the other’s shoulder as they hug.

They stay like that a while, eventually sitting down next to each other before treating themselves to food. Reki demands Langa be more clear with his words in the future- which only serves to confuse Langa since he thought he’d been perfectly clear.

Reki just sighs, flicking Langa and calling him a hopeless idiot before going back to eat. As Reki stares off, Langa can’t help the small smile that graces his lips. He never knew he could create such warmth from a few words, let alone find himself living life this way.. happy and it was all because of Reki.

[echo-has-queries]

Band-aids on my hand be like that's a free fidget except NO it's busy with protec :|

[spacevixenmusic]

Source: Avatar: The Legend of Korra [2014]

[stimboardboy]

minecraft haptic fidgets

TNT - slime | creeper - pixel heart

[andresmounts2]

Reasons Why I Might be Upset:

Hungry/Thirsty (When did I eat last...?)

Tired/Sleepy

Need to use the bathroom (like really bad)

Need to fidget (Really antsy & can't sit still)

Headache/Stomachache

Extremely cold or hot

Really need to cry (it's okay to cry sometimes)

Too loud/Overstimulating

Need a break

Change in routine (My life is now in shambles /j)

Overthinking (Argh, my brain is so loud rn)

Really need a hug (but please don't touch me)

[sewooonz]

(๑╹ڡ╹๑)🥢

[actuallyadhd]

The reason I realised I might have adhd was my brother, he's so clearly autistic so I did research to make sure.

When I brought it up with my mother she told me to not tell him.

I finally got my diagnosis after 3 years of trying to get it, of going deeper and deeper into it.

Idk, I never hated it? I never hated my adhd. Back in 2020 I was a more active person? In terms of doing the things I liked and doing art.

Now I'm slow, tired, fatigued.

And that happened after I took meds. Apparently ritalin prozac and anxiety meds aren't supposed to be taken together, Idk what my therapist was thinking.

She told me to get anxiety meds for my stimming, cause I stim cause I'm nervous. But I KNOW that I don't. I stim when I'm excited, or when I can't focus.

When I'm anxious, when I'm angry I go stiff a a rock, I get focused sharp, because I have to be, it's a defense mechanism.

I don't hate adhd I don't hate meds inheritly either. But I hate how my meds made me a zombie, that I was forced to go on them so I could achieve this academic goal.

Maybe if I lived in a place with better mental healthcare I wouldn't be dealing with the effects of bad medication and my worsening depression.

I'm slightly better now, but my executive function got fucked. I can't just, do the things I like anymore. I feel less feelings than I did before.

I don't hate myself I just, I guess I'm in a hurry to heal from everything when I'm still living with the people that abused and continue to abuse me emotionally.

Specially my abelist mother who keeps saying adhd and autism aren't a disability, and they're just a quirk like her being left handed.

My dad has finally came to the realisation that he probably has adhd like me.

I'm a uni student now and living in a dorm away from my family has helped me regain that control I had and live a healthier life. But I'm back now over the summer and I can feel myself going back to my old ways the more I stay at my family home.

Idk,

Is this cptsd? Idk what it is.

Is it bad to say I love my adhd? Usually at least. When there's no one breathing down my neck not letting me do my own thing, when I don't get pulled into random places and have a choice to stay. And say no.

I guess things will get worse before they get better....

Sent August 18, 2024

There's definitely a lot to unpack here. I'm sorry you're struggling so much right now. I will do my best to offer suggestions and reassurance, as always.

It makes sense that your brother is autistic and you have ADHD; both are highly heritable, and seem to be related in some way. So it also makes sense that your dad has now realized he probably has ADHD!

I have a feeling this is going to be long, so have a cut.

Stimming & Anxiety

Neurotypical people think that the only reason for fidgeting is anxiety.

It's not.

As a general rule, it's either expressive (as when we're happy or excited or upset) or regulating (as when we need to focus or feel overwhelmed).

And if stimming or fidgeting isn't disruptive or hurting anyone (including yourself), it definitely doesn't need to be medicated. WTAF.

Medication Issues

Medication can be tricky. The wrong meds can cause more problems than they solve. Even the right med at the wrong dose can be a problem!

Examples from my own life:

Starting dose of Concerta didn't do much, next dose up gave me a week-long anxiety attack.

Starting dose of Welbutrin made me feel like I was About to Die for a week.

Dexedrine initially made me NOT HUNGRY for three weeks. I lost 10 lbs.

Strattera made me depressed and adversely affected my typing (been accurately touch typing since I was 11, suddenly was making really weird typos).

Good dose of sertraline (Zoloft) helped my anxiety and depression but caused me to start skin picking in earnest; next dose up had me closing in on serotonin syndrome.

Adderall worked well (until it didn't) but also made me feel ill after I ate yogurt.

It sounds like you would need to try other meds or other doses, preferably one at a time(!), to find what works best for you overall.

Executive Function & Depression

It sounds like your depression is your biggest problem right now. Depression can worsen executive functioning, so that makes sense.

It's probably a good idea to talk to your prescribing doctor about your medication regime. Ask what your options are and if you can please work on getting off the antidepressant so you can try something else.

Alongside this, you may well be dealing with ADHD burnout, which I am only just coming out of myself. It's a struggle, to be sure!

My best advice for that is to be gentle with yourself. Don't expect yourself to Do All the Things; instead, keep a master list of things that need to get done and choose three of them to focus on each day (your Goals) and three fun ones to try to get to each day (your gravy).

It's okay if sometimes one of your Goals is to get dressed.

Parent Stuff

It sounds like your mom is trying to make you feel better or maybe herself(?). If that's how she needs to think of this all, let her. What matters is that she understands when you're struggling and is willing to support you. If not, you might like to refer her to this Russell Barkley video.

It's great that your dad has realized he has ADHD, though! Even if he doesn't bother to pursue a formal diagnosis, just knowing that can help a lot since if he's having issues he knows where to find suggestions that are more likely to actually work (because stuff that works for neurotypical people almost never works for ADHDers, while stuff that works for us also works for NT's).

Family Systems Theory says that how we behave around our family members is directed by how our family works as a system. There are also smaller systems within the whole that affect how individuals relate to each other. This is why we tend to fall back into childhood patterns when we're around our family of origin. Those patterns are ingrained through years of conditioning.

CPTSD?

While I don't think Gabor Maté is right about trauma and ADHD, I do think that it's pretty common for ADHDers to have childhood trauma. We spend years getting in trouble for stuff we couldn't control and being held to a standard we simply can't reach due to our ADHD, and that affects our self-esteem and is (to my mind) a big reason why so many of us have Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), which is that huge emotional reaction we can have to criticism (real or perceived).

I have found a lot of reassurance and helpful information about CPTSD through watching videos from the Crappy Childhood Fairy on YouTube. She reads letters from people and helps them with their problems, and she explains the problems faced by people who have CPTSD and offers ways to deal with them.

Loving ADHD

I don't think it's bad to love your ADHD. I do think it's a little weird, because most of us hate it a lot of the time, but I definitely see positives in my own life and view it as a neutral (if annoying) part of who I am.

I actually think it's great that you do love it, because it's going to be part of your life forever. Making sure you have systems in place to deal with the stuff that's challenging is going to be really important moving forward, but that's part of what this Tumblr is for.

Overall, I think you are probably doing better than you think you are, and once your meds get sorted you'll be in a much better space in general.

Followers, do you have anything to add, or any corrections to something I've said?

-J