#Don't you want smart ass Tim

[oifaaa]

fics that take like all agency from Tim or make him a master of communication and self reflection are like. where is my snarky slightly fucked up boy who's too smart for his own good

Like I know technically Tim was originally designed as a self insert for the audience but writing him like that now when he has so much character of his own really does him a disservice I'd love to see more fics with Tim actually being his snarky never listens to anyone purposely self sabotaging self

[on-leatheredwings]

It's not a request, just wanna know your thoughts about yandere masochist Tim?

•́ ‿ ,•̀

> romantic 18+ > twcw: bdsm, yandere-typical behaviors, can be read as dub-con despite reader being the dominant > kinda treated it like a hc/imagine request anyway hahhh it was fun to write!

Man, yandere masochist Tim would be a little bit of a mindfuck. But a delicious one, to be sure! I think the relationship is initially enticing to you because, well, Tim's the one getting dominated here. You're the one with the upper hand.

(He thinks it's very cute of you to assume that. Despite being the submissive, Tim’s definitely the one in control here.)

On a surface-level, Tim would enjoy letting go and putting himself in your hands. The Bats are adept at multitasking, but even geniuses like them get… stressed. Sometimes he doesn’t want to think, Lord knows he does enough of that already. Sometimes, it’s nice to be the pawn in someone else’s game for once, but also be able to enjoy it.

On a deeper level, Tim likes being your sub because it truly means that he's yours and you’re his. He loves when you pull at his hair, nip at him, or bully him. Your anger, your passion, your punishment– only he gets to see and enjoy the darker sides of you that you keep hidden from view during the day. Tim is greedy. Both the pain and pleasure you dish out is for him, and him alone, to take. And the same goes for your softness during the aftercare.

I see Tim enjoying being any flavor of masochist/sub, depending on his mood. And depending on yours as well! He can be a feisty, vexing brat with a smart mouth or a whimpering, pleading submissive. He has nothing if not the range! I think he’d really enjoy spanking or flogging.

His favorite position is head down, ass up. He likes the vulnerability and surprise, and the option to hide his face and mewl into the sheets. He's partial to being blindfolded as well! He enjoys bondage and shibari, too. He could easily escape, but he doesn't - that's him showing his respect, adoration, and trust for you.

Tim's more … possessive qualities will show themselves if you aren’t in a relationship with him, only friends with benefits.

"I may... find another sub, if that's okay with you?" No, it's not okay with him. Only he gets to see you this way. He feels obscenely, viscerally opposed to the idea, but he smiles amicably to your face.

Tim’s requests get more and more extreme to keep your attention. Show you that he lacks nothing, and he can go farther than any other masochist you could find. However, you didn't ask him to perform this way. Sure, you may be the dominant here, but your boundaries still matter don’t they? 

“Fine… but this is the last time, Tim,” you say, relenting. You’ll find him nodding, agreeing that of course, of course, just one more time for pity’s sake. That night, he’ll make sure to make the sweetest sounds. His role usually takes and receives, but Tim decides to also give. You can sit and ride his face until you orgasm. In your post-coital glow, you'll lie sandwiched to each other, breathless. He'll have your fingers trail on his skin and trace the bruises and the pretty pink welts you've left.

He'll whisper his agenda in your ear. You've always been easier to convince after loosening up. Okay, so maybe he was more hardcore than usual tonight, but you liked it, too. Why ruin a good thing? What could anyone give you that Tim can't? Maybe you really don't need to find someone else.

And most importantly, Tim will make it seem like you arrived at that conclusion entirely by yourself.

[qqueenofhades]

AAAAHHHHHHHH It's TIM! 1000% strong MN girl here and boy it's been real fun to watch Tim (and Peggy! Our amazing lieutenant governor) take a small small Democratic majority and do incredible things. My kid ate two meals at school every day for free. DELIGHTED that he's the VP pick. LET'S GOOOOOOOO!!!!

Listen, I am just ECSTATIC. Ever since I seriously became tuned into the veepstakes, he was my number one pick (I mean, I was not immune to the brief flirtation everyone had with Beshear/Buttigieg/etc), but yes. Walz was my top pick and I was trying desperately not to get my heart too set on him in case it fell through, but he was the obvious best choice of the contenders by a country mile. He has an almost absurdly Midwestern pro-America background (military veteran, public school teacher, football coach from a small rural town, etc) AND he has managed to enact a long list of progressive policies in Minnesota with a very narrow majority in the state legislature. Also, you're going to be seeing a lot of this video, for good reason:

Also.... let's be real, Shapiro would have been an incredible distraction/drag on the ticket, unfortunately. We don't need to deal with his retrograde views on Gaza and his other baggage, and while he is a very popular governor in Pennsylvania, it's less certain that his appeal would translate to other states. We can argue (or you know, let's not and move on) about whether or not that was fair, but this is just not the year to try to win the most critical high-stakes election ever by pissing off young voters. Shapiro has done plenty of good things and has time to develop his career further, but he would have been a BAD pick for 2024 and I was alarmed at how many Respected Pundits (tm) were pulling for him. Reuters even claimed that picking him would "defang Republican attempts to make Israel-Gaza a wedge issue for Democrats," which is such a mind-bogglingly stupid statement that it makes you wonder how anyone writing it actually got paid for their political insight, but it also explains a lot about mainstream media these days. Picking Shapiro would have been an absolute gift to the Republicans and bad-faith actors and others (plus like, I don't want to have to spend time winning back the young voters who are actually once more engaged in the process!) and would have led to the media eagerly jumping into the feeding frenzy (because they're desperate to have a reason not to cover Trump's increasingly crazy-ass shit) and other Democratic-on-Democratic infighting. And it goes without saying that WE CANNOT AFFORD THAT.

As well, picking Shapiro just because you need to win PA this election cycle is yet another example of why the Electoral College sucks, and the polling averages in PA have been moving solidly blue anyway. You can just park Shapiro there and have him campaign in the state as the sitting popular governor, rather than expose him to the liability of a nationwide campaign where, as noted, all the other stuff would be a drag. If it's true that the establishment was pushing Harris to pick Shapiro and she picked Walz instead, a) GOOD! and b) if anything, this election cycle needs to fucking teach us that we have got to stop going with the Conventional Wisdom Tee Em. Walz was already out there, he was already popular with the public/energizing the grassroots, AND he was the guy who coined the "Weird" attack line that is actually effective and organically popular against the Republicans and drives them batshit. So for Kamala to lean into that and take him as her running mate is... zomgz... smart, and I am not used to the Democrats playing smart and aggressive and not just passive-defensive. I don't understand. Wow.

Anyway, now watch the New York Times (and the others, lbr, but especially the NYT) desperately try to dig up scandalous stories about that time Walz didn't stop at the 4H booth at the county fair, or walked past someone without saying "Ope just gonna sneak by ya first" or some other terrible Midwestern sin, but fuck those guys. I am EXCITED I am ENERGIZED I am THRILLED. This is a GREAT new ticket that came together at incredibly short notice and completely changed the dynamics everywhere, Walz is gonna make JD Vance cry (unsure whether I want to see Harris demolish Trumpster or Midwestern Dad to turn the cranks on Weird Couchfucking Fascist Skidmark more, but both, both, both is good). LET'S GO GET THOSE WEIRD MOTHERFUCKERS, Y'ALL!!

HARRIS/WALZ 2024!

[jadeddangel]

Creepypast & Marble Hornets headcannons:

Jeff the Killer:

100% sneaks into your house/ room just to wake you up randomly to spook you

If he ever took you on a date it would 100% be to the cheapest cinema in town cause my man's is broke

Your the breadwinner, you can make $2 a month and still be the breadwinner

He buys axe body spray and sags his jeans like a middle school boy and you can't convince me otherwise

Opened a nesquick Powdered milk tub with a table saw cause he couldn't get him open

Doesn't know how to undo child proof locks on meds no matter how many times you explain it to him

"No Jeff your not listening. Press down and then turn it," your voice scolded

"I'm trying! Damn you woman!!" Jeff yelled back

Yea, he never opened the jar right

Masky:

It started with you and Tim dating and then when you met masky you trying getting to know him

He ignores you at first, more focused on doing his job then dealing with his other half's lover

He's smart, he'll pick locks open jars and complete puzzles in no time flat

He doesn't make money but Tim does so indirectly he's the breadwinner

He'll start hanging out with you after getting tired of sleeping on the downstairs couch

He's not nice, like at all, he's very blunt and when it comes to any type of criticism, constructive or not, he's pointing out every miniscule flaw

Don't bother lying to him, he can see right through it and it pisses him off

It doesn't matter your gender or your sex. He's turning around when you change any form of your clothes. He's big on privacy

"Masky? C'mon masky, it's just a sweater you don't have to turn. I'm wearing a shirt underneath, " you sighed, pulling your sweater off

Masky shook his head. "I don't care sometimes you don't wear a shirt under them, and i don't wanna see your nipples," masky spoke bluntly

Yeaaaa, if you can't tell your sex life is totally (not) amazing with man

Tim:

As I said before Tim has a job, he Linda needs it to pay for his smoking habits

Speaking of smoking, he hates when you do any kind of drugs, he doesn't want you to end up like he did

He's surprising clingy behind closed doors and really likes being your little spoon

He constantly takes showers and cleans your shared home, even if no one except for you, him and masky will see it.

He has this bad habit of just buying whatever he craves, so when he goes to the store, expect the bill to be rather high

As I said before he's clingy behind closed doors but when it comes to pda the most he'll do is lock your pinkies together

"Tim, pleaseeeee I just wanna hold your hand! Just five minutes, and if you don't like it, you don't have to keep holding my hand. " You tried to bargain

Tim sighed "fine fine but you're giving me your box of cigarettes. Don't think I didn't smell them on you"

He has a sharp nose, so there's no point in trying to hide things from him

Hoodie:

Hoodie was beyond confused when he first met you, he had a whole "who what when where why?" Moment

You and brain both pay for everything so there's not really a breadwinner

Hoodie is rather quiet, it's not because he's awkward or shy, he just has nothing to say

Hoodie Hates coffee, he's more of a tea or energy drink guy

I hate to say this(no I dont), but he's a stoner, he hates all vape or smoking products except for weed

He usually sticks to weed vapes since it's less work and he can be a bit lazy when it comes to that

I mean his hygiene is ok he doesn't really shave or trim any thing but his beard but yknow he do him

Speaking of , he leaves his beard shavings all over the sink and leaves the toilet seat up

"HOODIE! GET YOUR BUTT IN HERE NOW" You shouted to get the man's attention

Hoodie walked in. "What?" He said monotonely

You pointed at the sink and then the toilet "pick up your fucking mess!!"

Hoodie shook his head "Nah I'm good. Thanks for the offer, though. "

You would probably try and beat him up if he couldn't just wollop our ass

Brian:

He's such a sweet boy,it like he's made out of cotton candy

He's mostly did cleaning and cooking on top of his job but after switching back from hoodie, he's out of commission for like a week

He picks up after himself, and does his own laundry and there's never beard trimmings in the sink

He occasionally forgets to put the toilet seat down but it's rather rare

He's not too clingy but he does cuddle up sometimes

HES A FUCKING FURNACE WHEN HE SLEEPS

"Brian pleaseee get off!! It's the middle of summer! It's too hot to be cuddling" you huffed sleepily

"Shhh just let me hold you.." Brian muttered

Ticci Toby:

Your the breadwinner. Period

You think this man has a job? Hah funny

He hates when he tics especially when you are trying to have intimate moments together

You guys have to be silly during sex especially when he has a verbal tic and just yells bird

"Fuck toby right there~" you moaned out holding onto his shoulders tightly

"I'm so c-*whistles* shit sorry~" toby moaned out a bit embarrassed

"Toby it's ok it's normal~.." you muttered a bit trying to keep your voice even

Toby nodded "fuck I lov-Birds!" Toby shouted

You both looked at eachother before bursting out laughing just holding eachother close

Overall aside from Toby's horrible moodswings at times and his "work" you guys have a pretty helpful relationship

Slenderman:

No, Just no

This man is toxic asf when you guys first meet, definitely a manipulator

He tones it down after a bit but still gaslights you into getting what he wants

When he gets angry, please down run from him- he will track you down and may or may not resort to physical violence to get you to learn your lesson

If you ask about the missing children he WILL gaslight you into thinking that's he's told you before and it hurts that you forgot and won't tell you again

Sex? What sex? You think he would let you even get close enought to see that shit happen hah very funny

"Slenderman? Cmon I'm sorry you know I didn't mean to hurt you.." you muttered softly

"No. I already told you, and you forgot.. it is insensitive of you and unwise of me to tell you again, " he responded through your mind. And though he doesn't have eyes, you could only assume he was glaring

He's not healthy for you, but you've got yourself into this for life and there's only 1 way to get out

Eyeless jack:

Just like Jeff he'll sneak into your room

You literally can't get rid of him

He won't talk or anything, just stand and stares

He doesn't cuddle and he barely touches you

He definitely tried to offer you a kidney as a way of telling you he appreciates you

No hygiene whatsoever, he doesn't shave and it takes a month before you even get him to shower

He mostly just grumbles and groans to let you know he understands what your saying

He's really smart, puzzles, locks ,and riddles are no match for him

He's blunt, when he does talk it's rare, bit it's honest and unfiltered

You guys barely have sex and honestly you've probably never seen his face

"Jack, please!! I just wanna see your face, " you whined, laying yourself over his lap

"I said no, and if you keep asking, I'll eat you. Literally, " Jack retorted

Yeaaaa he meant it literally and you could tell

[wondersinwaynemanor]

here i go again with "big brother dick grayson strikes again" prompts.

thinking of Dick probably helping his siblings on their first dates and offering to take them to the location.

Dick to Jason: Hey, Little Wing. I know you can take one of your motorcycles, but let me take you. You can just focus on being pretty.

Jason: Shut up, Dick. But, are you sure? I don't know why my hands feel a bit numb-

Dick, takes Jason's hands on his to warm them up and untighten the nerves there: It's okay. I got you. You're okay. It's going to be okay. Don't stress yourself out.

Jason: I know I fucked up many times, Dick. I don't want.. I don't know what to do if I fuck this up.

Dick, brings Jason closer: Shh. You won't, Jay. You're very smart and strong, and so so caring and you don't even realize it it. Ask the kids at the Alley, they idolize you. Roy adores you and everything you do. He knows who you are. And trust me, I'm not that bitter anymore of one of my best friends dating my younger brother.

Jason smiles which warms Dick's heart, making him smile too.

Dick: Plus, we wouldn't want Ollie to think that a Wayne cannot dress up and be romantic right?

Jason grins this time.

Dick to Tim: Timmy, I have a great idea! I'll drive you there. I know you're tired from work already. Just let me know which restaurant then you can rest a bit when we travel there.

Tim: It's okay, Dick. You're also tired from your shift. I'll just let Kon know I'll be late for a few-

Dick: No, no. If you want to rest first, let him know, he'll understand. But I'll still take you.

Tim: But, Dick...

Dick: Nah-uh. I didn't drive you to prom, remember? Let me do this, Baby Bird. And for me to also look out for Lex, just in case he bothers Conner again. We don't want that happening in the middle of your date.

Tim, laughs: Well, Kon will just have to drag Lex's ass to space.

Dick laughs with him.

Dick to Cass: Aww, you look beautiful, Cass. So where you going? Where will you meet Steph?

Cass, fixing her necklace: By her house.

Dick: Great! I already know where that is. I'll drive you there. We don't want to ruin your beauty. I mean, that's totally impossible, but I want you to just relax before the date.

Cass, blushes: I can do it.

Dick: Of course, you can. But I want to. Pretty please, pretty please. I'm a little protective over my sister.

Cass, rolls her eyes fondly but smiles: Of course. Thank you.

Dick: You're most welcome. And tell Steph if she does something extreme like set some fireworks, tell her to lay off with those energy drinks she started on her diet.

Dick to Duke: Little D, Little D! Don't even try to say no cus maybe your brothers and sister have already told you, but this is kinda my tradition now. I'm taking you to your first date.

Duke: They did tell me. But, Dick.. I don't want to be a burden. Weren't you injured-

Dick: No, no. That was like last week. I'm good. As long as you're good with me to take you, right? Now, I don't want to be the burden.

Duke, smiles: Never.

Dick, smiles and gives Duke a side hug: Then you're never a burden too, Little D. A big bro has to look out for the younger ones. Plus, I can say that you dressing up nice comes from my influence.

Duke, chuckles: Who else am I looking up to, right?

Dick to Damian: Shush, Dami. I know you're dating a super, and he can come and get you without a minute to spare, but tell Jon I'll be taking you.

Damian: Richard, please. I'm already at the right age.

Dick, puts a hand on his little (not so anymore) brother's shoulder and he refuses not to tear up (he fails ofc): I know, you've grown up so much, Dami. So much, since I made you Robin. But please, it will make me really happy to do this. It will give me peace, in some way. It sounds ridiculous, but yes.

Damian, doesn't even try to hide the fond he has on his face: Alright, Richard. I'll let Jon know.

Dick: He's not taking you somewhere out of Gotham or Metropolis, right? Cus then we'll have to take the Batplane.

Damian, chuckles: It's in Metropolis, don't worry.

Dick: Phew. I was as nervous as the time I took Tim on his date.

so....

maybe after a few years on Dick and Wally's wedding day, Dick's younger siblings will be walking with him on the aisle by his side and Bruce, their Father, on his other side of course. and they're thankful that the aisle is wide enough to fit the whole Wayne kids. Dick is a crying mess and he hasn't even reached Wally yet by the end of the aisle. because he's genuinely happy to have his siblings take him to the love of his life this time.

[dairy-farmer]

Okay but CONSIDER~☆ Petty, territorial, exhibitionist Kon!

(Also he has Strong Opinions and I tried to keep things In Character since I am working that. He's against feminizing Tim because he doesnt want to make his boyfriend disphoric. Slight realism to the porn? Attempted!)

Him and Tim? Dating. His memory? Flawless. He remembers EXACTLY all the emotionally scarring bullshit they put his boyfriend through. Tim may forgive, but HE doesn't. Fuck those guys.

What's WORSE? He can hear EVERYTHING. Your expressionless mask doesn't mean SHIT when he can hear your heart rate pick up. SEE your eyes dilate. When walls don't do SHIT to stop him hearing you beating your meat franticly, after excusing yourself to "make a call".

But Tim's HIS. Not theirs.

They break his heart and make him feel not good enough. KON makes him feel loved and powerful and happy. KON spent his whole life, fighting to have things that were JUST for him. His, not superman, not anyone else's. His. And Tim? Is HIS boyfriend. Is amazing.

And Kon LOVES making him feel good.

Really taking his time. Using his TTK to tease and pinch, stroke and hold, keeping Tim JUST where he needs him. Taking care of his needs in the ways Tim never seems too. Over and over, til he's all soft and boneless. Twitching. Gushing all the pleasure Kon pumped into him. Head finally quiet.

It's amazing.

So maybe that's why he doesn't stop. Even though he hears the arrogant stomping of Jon's bratty friend. Jon cleared out to the barn and some loud music over an hour ago. When he caught the LOOK Kon was giving Tim. Smart kid. But apparently not smart enough to drag his buddy along. Because now the little shit is looking for him.

Kon doesn't care.

He is face first between to long, powerful, legs and trying to make Tim's brain melt with his tounge alone. From the grip on his hair? Decent progress, so far. He adds fingers, making Tim's back bow. Earning those awesome little sounds.

The foot steps faltered then froze, outside his door. The brats heart rate has sky rocketed. Turned on by listening to Tim getting finger fucked. What a little perv.

But? Kon's discovered? He's kinda... in to it.

Showing them what they'll NEVER get to have. Showing them how it's DONE. That's right, little perv, listen to how GOOD I make him feel. You could never. This is what he, the REAL Robin, deserves.

Fucking Tim? While Damian stands frozen just outside his bedroom door? Is one of the best times they've had together. Kon nearly breaks his bed. Leaves Tim hoarse but glowing the next day. Granted, with a noticeable limp and unable to sit down, but Tim is hardly complaining.

Kon just grins, like a shark, every time Damian looks at him.

And of course, Kon has to do it again. It was AMAZING. Invite him oooover, babe. He miiiiisses yoooou. Sad face.

Tim laughes but does. Gotham is stressful after all. Even if, for some reason, the gremlin has been avoiding him. Weird, chirps Kon, who knows EXACTLY why. Wonder why that could be?

Arrives to find Dickhea- sorry, Tim's BELOVED brother DICK, who definitely didn't betray him, and TOTALLY didn't try to Put Him In ARKHAM, THAT Dick... hanging around. Trying to "make amends". (Kon's ass he is.) And doing team ups. Hanging like a leech all over KON'S boyfriend. Eating all of the food TIM should be coaxed into eating before there's a chance and lounging around Tim's home like he owns the place!

.....ha ha. Kon's not mad, babe. Promise. He could NEVER be mad at YOU. :) :) :)

(He might murder this clingy bitch, though.)

But, hey! This IS Rob's place. And you know what's Perfectly Reasonable, nay, even NATURAL, to do in one's own place? With their boyfriend? Come here, babe~ My power, clever, gorgeous, sexy, hasn't showered for three days, hot mess~ let's get you cleaned up and in bed.

Oh yeah, your brother will TOTALLY respect Boyfriend's Over time. I texted him for you and everything thing! (Kon didn't and honestly? Dick wouldn't.)

So Kon gets his boyfriend naked. Always a delight. Some sexy groping and forplay in the shower. Wet and sexy fun! A classic. Can Kon hear Dick planning to "head over to Tim's"? Half way across the city? Well maybe certain individuals are about to learn to text first. And that they will NEVER get what they want so bad, no matter how hard they go panting.

Meanwhile? Kon is working Tim up. Hitting all his good spots. Stubble rubbed against the neck, as he kisses his way down. Not too hard, since Kryptonian hair has no give. Just little prickly sparks. Right down to his pecs. Not tits, never tits, or Kon gets kicked out of the bed for WEEKS. Made THAT mistake exactly ONCE.

Manly, manly pecs with the hottest pink little nipples you've ever seen. Likes when Kon uses his TTK for the other one. Focuses on uses his hands to stretch him, tease his fantastic hole and little t-dick clit. Tim totally loses it. Starts trying to RIDE his hand and make him go faster. Always whines and begs when Kon has to hold him still.

Oh look, someone sneaking in the window uninvited. Wonder who that could be? Gee, sure hope he remembered to close that security feed of the bedroom. But, shucks. Technology is just SO confusing! Hope they don't ASSUME Tim is ALWAYS at his desk and go looking there first!

Does Kon sit up and leave Tim's nips to his TTK, just so the cameras can REALLY get a good visual? Of COURSE not. Tim just really, REALLY enjoys the feeling. So he's giving him double the action as he slides home. Even adds his clit to the teasing, just to see that open mouth, gasping for air, feral thrashing look, Tim gets.

Kon hear the searching, meandering footsteps of their intruder, reach Tim's desk and freeze. In that way only a highly trained Bat could. A heart rate spikes and breathe is sucked in sharply. A swallow.

Ah, did Kon for get to turn off the audio? Whoops. Thank goodness it was on low, huh? But I bet that close to the desk, you can hear it. Room's REAL quiet.

Shift of fabric, the camera's audio is turned up.

Perverts, all of um. "Brotherly feelings" his ASS. Kon fucks Tim through his first orgasm, pounding short and rough RIGHT against that spot he likes, just as Tim likes him too. Listens to Tim's perv brother jerk himself desperately. Fantasize about how HE would be SO much nicer and sweeter to Tim's hole. Timmy this and that, like Rob's a little kid.

Like Rob would even be INTO any of that.

Calls Robs pecs TITS. Calls him PRETTY. Has no idea what Tim NEEDS and never did. Can't GIVE IT to Tim like Kon can. Pump into his hole until Tim feels like he's gonna break, then grind nice and deep until he DOES. Tease him for hours when he's all stressed and lost in his head, so he unravels into mush. Lift him up and don't let him down until he's been STUFFED with you. Til his legs are shaking and he can barely see straight. Till all he want is to pass out and cuddle.

Rob needs someone who will lovingly fuck him UNCONSCIOUS and will still be there, holding him, FUCKING HIM, when he wakes up. Needs to be so WANTED it drives someone a little insane. Needs good and pleasure and thoughtless, bone melting bliss. Not babying and tender little nothings.

And frankly? Kon is a petty, mean, Tim-fucker. He's woken up and chosen violence.

Deliberately avoids Tim's g-spot, like that isn't an execution worthy offense. Tell him, babe~ He wants to HEAR. What do want him to do to you? And Tim? Who is being fucking edged and FURIOUS about it? Says BET, opens his mouth, and makes all of Kon's dreams come true.

Holy Shit, Babe~ :D Yes Sir o7

Kon gets to destroy some perv fantasies, hear FANTASTIC Tim dirty talk, AND use TTK to fuck every orifice Tim HAS. It's a fantastic afternoon. He even gets Tim to take a nap instead of going back to work.

And would you look at that~ No clingy leech! You want pizza? Bart recommend this great place. Let's get pizza!

But then Mr. Broody Psychological Trauma is demanding Tim come play hostess to his Gala. Isn't he dating or something? A socialite no less? Make HER do it! But no. Tim has to go entertain old rich bastards and smile.

Fuck it. He's coming too.

Tim just laughs at his blatant gate-crashing plans and hands him an invite. Asks if he wants to go suit shopping. Mmmmmm sexy suit sex. Roleplay options. Yes please. They go shopping. It's awesome.

Less awesome? The party. Very boring in fact. And EVERYBODY wants to fuck his boyfriend. This may be his villian origin story. Also he fuckin KNEW it. "Bruce isn't like that" Kon's ass! He ALSO called that he totally wants to bone Clark. Without his piercings in? And in a suit? Kon looks VERY Clark-ish. Tim's old man keeps checking him out.

Frankly, however, Kon doesnt care.

He's on his last god damned nerve with these "oops! Ha ha, my bad." Handsy mother fuckers, touching his boyfriend. He dives into the crowd. Something, something, he's drunk, Tim. Come get air with me.

Tim knows damn well he can't GET drunk.

So obviously he better go take care of his Poor Drunk Boyfriend (ooooh nooooo).

Tim drags him to some side room the family uses. Before Kon can even get his hands under all those layers, he's sliding to his knees and swallowing Kon to the root. Fuck. It's EXACTLY what Kon needs. Hot and wet, cherishing and so damn eager. Absolutely milking him.

He cups that beautiful head and let's TTK slid down his body. Like hands stroking under clothes. Pinching and massaging his pecs. Rubbing his skin. Teasing his clit. Spreading him open for fingers to stretch and fuck. Kon can just lean back and enjoy the moaning. The eager rocking of Tim's mouth onto his cock.

Especially as the feeling turns from rubbing to fingers fucking into him. From fingers into toys. From toys into cock. Until Kon is spit roasting his Boyfriend all on his own. Making him whimper and twitch as he's rocked between two cocks, just how he likes it. Clinging to Kon and treated like something precious, head utterly empty, nothing but his next orgasm to worry about.

He whines when Kon pulls out of his mouth. But Kon promises he's just switching ends.

The best part? About using TTK during sex? Is they never need sex furniture. Kon can just bend Tim over thin air. Hold him there. So long as SOME part of him is touching Tim. Which, really, is an easy ask. And dragging down the probably ruined suit pants, Kon distantly notes soft steps approaching the door.

He slides home regardless. Grips those amazing hips and starts to pound. Tim desperately teasing his chest. Mouth open to be fucked by TTK cock, pouring out moans and fucked out cries. The wet squelch of their bodies meeting.

The footsteps have frozen. A reaction, muted. Almost... trained. Someone used to controlling their body. Oh my, oh my. It's the big perv.

The door's a crack. Not closing it, huh? So who are you staring at, Bat? Tim, your SON, as he gets fucked. Gasping and drooling, moaning for more, harder, deeper. Or Kon? The CLONE of your "best friend", a married man. As he fucks your son. Hips rolling, muscles lit with sweat, groaning in the pleasure takes from the body beneath him.

Which is the one you're getting off too, Batman? Tim? Him? Both of them? That's right, close the door and run. Kon can still hear you jerking it in the family wing.

Maybe Galas ARE fun.

As for Hood? Kon gets confronted. Because Jason can see the pattern developing and is self aware enough to Admit Some Stuff to Himself(tm). He WILL shoot you. And worse, he'll tell Tim. M.A.D. mother fucker.

Well, then. As long as he's aware Kon wants his spine as a mantle decoration. And he never, EVER makes a move on his Boyfriend. Yeah. Kon is willing not to torment him with glorious Tim Sex.

Great. Here's some coupons and gift cards to fancy ass date spots. Leave Jason to suffer his many mistakes in peace. The SECOND you are dead...

Ha! Tim will clone me. But THIS time, with my permission and adding his DNA so we have a Clone-Baby. Bart is husband number 2. None of you fuckers have a chance.

Suffer.

Like Kon said, he is a petty, Tim-loving, exhibitionist, bastard. He also now has date night plans! Sweet. Oooh. Fancy! This one's that new place with the waiting list. Nice.

-🐼🐼🐼

kon being a borderline exhibitionist and making sure to fuck tim in front of his family so they know exactly who he belongs to- and then them having planned out that if he dies bart will be tim's second husband so no one in his family can have him 😭😭😭

[idyllcy]

shoujo woes - tim drake x reader (pretty bird countdown #2)

The second time your head hurts, you stay curled up in bed, mood visibly ruined as you call in sick, Tim nowhere in view while he's out for work. The world is ending and you are being dramatic.

"Pretty bird? I brought takeout!" Tim calls from the door, and you get up, blanket dragging behind you as you do.

"Aw..." Tim forces the blanket around your face, arms wrapping around your head as he snickers. "Those two inches are really helping, huh?"

"Shortass."

"Midget."

"Fun sized."

"Inconsiderate." You stick your tongue out, mouth open for air as he finally stops smothering you.

"Would an inconsiderate fun-sized shortass bring you your favorite takeout home?"

"No, but my husband would." You beam, cheek squished to his chest, opening your arms for him. He accepts it, head buried in your chest as you sigh.

"What got you down this time?"

"You're gonna laugh at me."

"Oh, then it was definitely something you read."

You smack him in retaliation, blanket cushioning him from the impact. 

"I knew it." He laughs. "What happened this time?"

"I'm happy I met you." You mumble. "Oh, yeah. If you had a pill to change your destiny, would you do it?"

"Will I get to meet you, still?"

"I don't know." You mumble, cheek squished on top of his head. "Maybe not if you change your destiny."

"We're soulmates in every universe." Tim huffs. "If I can not have you in that one, then it is not worth living."

"That's awfully dramatic."

Tim shuffles out of your embrace, sticking his tongue out at you as he pulls on his bottom eyelid. "I didn't marry you for you to tell me I'm being dramatic when I say I can't live without my wife."

You snicker, throwing the blanket over your head as you fold it. 

"Would you take the pill?"

"No." You hum. "I am where I want to be. If I took the pill and decided to live the best version of myself, I wouldn't have been able to meet you or go manic in middle school. What happens if the end of the world comes and you are not there? Who's gonna catch my ass when I fall out of windows while taking photos of you and your siblings? Seriously."

"There you go." Tim hums. "Your takeout's gonna get cold."

"FUCK." You yell, tossing the blanket to the couch as you unpack the food.

Tim snorts, arms resting over your shoulders as you sit at the kitchen island.

"I'm tired, pretty bird." He sighs. "Those businessmen are assholes."

"I figured. You have so much money from your inheritance, though."

"Yeah." Tim grumbles. "I just... didn't want to squander all the money."

"Fair."

"So... what were you reading?"

"A manhua about this girl who takes this pill to become both pretty and smart and how she gets so tired of living in a lie that she wants her old life back. It's like... high school romance." You offer him a bite. "In the end, the people around her who took the pill also ended up giving up what they got in exchange."

"Yeah?"

"Mm." You hum. "It had me thinking what would happen if I gave up who I actually am."

"Truly terrifying." He swallows, grumbling. "If you didn't run that twitter account for me, I would genuinely kill myself."

"WHAT."

"Joking... I think I'm picking up your humor." 

"That's definitely my humor." You mumble dryly. "Do you find me annoying when I have a mental breakdown?"

"Regardless, we're married now, aren't we?" 

You bite the inside of your cheek. 

"I still love you." Tim hums. "You will never be annoying to me. Not when the entirety of Gotham is losing their marbles over my wedding ring and your tweets, at least."

"I'm so gen z core..."

Tim's face cringes at your words, and you laugh.

[lupiinist]

i've been on a bit of a dc brainrot for a while, but i also have the non-binary urge to make everything about the marauders, so here i'll be leaving my marauders x dc headcanons

regulus is batman. no, i won't hear anything about it. he didn't lose his parents tho, he lost his brother (sirius' alive, he just doesn't know it yet, lazarus pit, yada yada yada), he grew up with his buttler (not sure if it would be kreacher?) and ends up becoming the dark knight (rich, moved by vengeance, out for blood, but no killing)

james is superman, and i doubt anyone can argue with this one. (look at that man's big brown doe eyes and tell he wouldn't be the biggest superman fan). he was raised by effie and monty, but is the same old kryptonian we know. he rescues kittens on threes, shoots lasers from his eyes and is a big old softie

lily is lois lane. this woman has pulitzers and can change an entire country's point of view about something with 1 (one) column on the planet. she could be the president. she's beautiful. she's smart.

(also, this could be both a clois or superbat situation, doesn't really matter)

remus is jimmy olsen! tired alien bestie, likes to take pictures, wonders how no one else caught on that james is superman because that man can't lie to save his life??? he doesn't even look that different without his glasses??????

back to gotham, narcissa would be batwoman (reg's cousin, full of rage, wearing a bat mask to punch people on the streets? besides, BUFF NARCISSA? yes, please), dating her lovely future wife detective fortescue (alice is montoya, yes), i think she would still be married as narcissa for a while (she Will dump lucius' ass) and go out with alice as batwoman

on the other hand, bellatrix is absolutely harley, i don't think there's even another option? and yes, tom riddle is the joker (ironic for someone called riddle, i know), but who cares about him, honestly?

anyway, rita skeeter is poison ivy!

barty is catwoman, this man steals from the rich people, pisses off his father (crouch sr. would be gordon in this), and gets to flirt with big scary batman (he finds regulus so hot it's a bit pathetic)

pandora is babs, batgirl and future oracle, and i don't know if evan would be the first robin? the timeline in my head couldn't find a kid to be the first robin besides like, nymphadora, but i think circus evan and pandora who lost their parents, and one joined batman while the other became a cop is sort of nice?

on the robin situation, draco is jason todd (it gets progressively more angst the more you think about it), future red hood, and harry would be conner (yes, i know, 'why isn't harry jon?' because i don't want him to be :])

luna would be tim drake. she would one hundred percent manipulate regulus into letting her become robin after the previous robin's death, and she has what it takes to be both a genius and the next ceo of reggie's company. she's just that good.

and last but not least, my favorite ladies:

marlene mckinnon as supergirl, and dorcas meadowes as lena luthor. they hate each other. they find each other hot af. they pin after each other. why aren't they together yet???????

[glennquackmire]

My hunger games au lore that im acting so odd over because I keep getting flashbacks to the other post

Ik i said I would make this into a video but it was getting to like 10 minutes long 😭 so here's a really shortened version of some of it OK SO

-The curtis brothers live in DISTRICT 7 instead because I like the idea of them being lumberjacks it's funny and also because the Curtises knowing alot about plants and trees and stuff is kind of relevant

-Their parents died in an altercation with some peacekeepers. Is that still lazy?? Yea but hopefully not as lazy

-Ponyboy still genuinely believes Darry sees him as a burden and despises him so he is under the impression that Darry is going to try and kill him the second they get into that arena so naturally he tries to get as far away from him as possible for most of the games.

-instead dally and johnny are from district 12 which I THINK fits better for them??? Johnny still has the same kind of schtick as in the original post where he believe he doesn't have a shot at winning which he's not really coping well with, but dally I kind of changed its not that he thinks he can or can't win its more that he doesn't want to. He's super mad the two of them have been put into this situation and doesn't want to conform to the opressive system the capitol has put in place to keep the district peoples lives being used as entertainment I guess. But I don't really know if it's in a "i want to start a revolution" way or not I guess.

-Tim I mostly added because I like him.I'm a tim stan. He's from district 8 for the same reason the curtis brothers are from district 7, I like the idea of him being really good at sewing. I'm still on the fence on whether I wanna add Angela or Curly as tributes too but as it stands tim is the only one that has been reaped out if the three of them. He's really desperate to get back for this reason because he knows without him his siblings would be left on their own. He's also really really smart in this au so he makes it super far into the games.

-The socs respectively are from Districts 1, 2 and 4 because them being the careers makes sense to me. Like the advantages that the careers have in the games just kind of aligns with the advantages the socs have in LIFE. Does that make sense????? Idk I might be talking out of my ass here 😭. The combinations of the socs have changed around alot but I keep going back to Randy and Marcia in 1, Cherry and Bob in 2 and Paul and Beverly (from the musical !! Its so good go listen to it) in 4.

-Steve and Twobit I added because I think they're a funny duo and they're from district 6 (get it cause it's the transportation district). I really don't have much to say about them honestly I have a little bit so if u wanna hear about them let me know !! Originally it was gonna be sodapop and Steve but I couldn't find a way for it to make sense. Maybe I'll add him in and say he's not related to darry and ponyboy or something I don't know. I hate leaving him out though ily soda.

-Scout is still here (hi scout) but she's used as a bit of a plot device now lol

-the arena is a huge forest, but its also got some really mountainous areas

-there IS mutts now but they're let loose about 2 thirds of the way through and aren't around for very long. The fire is still there as well because mostly i just enjoy drawing fire.

-I think (?) That's everything, I'll keep the deaths and the other stuff that happens in the arena for another post because this is already kind of long I think

-if you want to hear more you can totally message me !! I love talking to people or u can use the ask box I would literally love either of these but obviously no pressure 😭

-I have a BUNCH of drawings done for this au like so many

Anyway I think the moral of the story is not being a good writer and 3 days of being awake are not a good combo lol

[byfulcrums]

Things that have definitely been said in YJ (the Cartoon)

M'gann: WAIT WALLY DON'T EAT- that....

Kaldur: Wally, that was a highly dangerous and toxic object. You should go immediately to the hospital

Wally, with his mouth full of one of M'gann's failed attempts at mixing martian and human cuisine: Mmmhph????

The team: *Arguing*

Tim, whispering to himself: We don't kill we don't kill we don't kill we don't kill we don't kill-

Kaldur: Your opinion is valid, yes, but given it is a stupid ass opinion, I have elected to ignore it

Wally, following Artemis around the place, gesturing wildly: Yeah but if you add water to water it grows, right? It makes sense, Artemis, it makes sense–

Artemis, covering her ears and groaning: *Whispers* I hate every single one of you

Dick, filming the whole thing: *Snorts and accidentally chokes on his saliva, causing him to fall on the floor coughing like crazy*

Conner, having just walked into the room: ...Nope. Bye. I'm leaving this team

Artemis: Honestly I think Dick Grayson is way better than Bruce Wayne

M'gann: He's also more handsome, not gonna lie...

Wally: *Laughing his ass off on the floor*

Dick, curled up inside the vents, holding his head with his hands: Worthless... you are all worthless...

Conner, unaware of heterosexuality because CADMUS didn't teach him all that stuff: Wait, girl's aren't supposed to like girls? And boys aren't supposed to love boys? But I thought humans were called ‘homosapiens’

Zatanna: Oh my god-

Wally: I'm so smart. The smartest person here, if you will

Artemis: ...“sHoULdN't wE cAll sTrAiGht pEoPlE hEtERoSaPiEnS?”

Wally: Shut up shut up shutupshutup SHUT UP-

Kaldur, sighing: I just- I just want to know why you threw Wally off the mountain

Conner: Wally dared me to. It was consensual

Kaldur: Conner that doesn't make it any better.

Zatanna: I have decided to blame every kind of emotional instability I've having on my period. I don't have it yet, but I'm about to, so it counts

Kaldur: *Sigh* What did you do

Kaldur: Wally GET OFF THE CEILING honestly I should not have to say that...

Jaime: Fuck.

Bart: Double fuck.

Both of them at the same time: Triple fucking fuck

Wally: Hey, who's the stupidest one here?

Everyone else: You

Wally: Oh

Wally: And that's how you finish this equation!

Artemis: Wait you know science?

Wally: ...yes? Did you think I didn't go to school?

Artemis: No, no, it's just that if I had to think of someone who is an expert in science I wouldn't think of you

Wally: Well that's just rude. Hey M'gann, do I look like I didn't go to school?

Artemis: I didn't say you didn't go to-

Conner, immediately appearing: Yes

Wally:

Zatanna: Oh yeah! I remember when a branch on fire almost fell on me. We were camping. It was a big branch.

Zatanna:

Zatanna: I almost died.

Dick, didn't get any sleep in two days: Milk is... bone juice. Calcium...

Wally, also didn't get any sleep in two days: I feel like I should be concerned about that statement but honestly I'm interested

M'gann, who cannot stand being around them while they're sleep deprived: Both of you. Sleep. Now. Please

Dick: Baby

Tim: What

Dick: Baby... baby brother. Baby

Tim: No

Jason, has been Robin for almost three months now, training with the team and having to pretend to be a ‘villain’: I will hold your decapitated head in front of your weeping mother and hang it on her ceiling so that you will never get any rest even after death! :D

The team:

Wally: Dick, what are you feeding this child?

Kaldur after Wally and Dick pranked the team: Violence is not the question nor the answer, but sometimes we must take drastic measures

Kaldur, handing Jason a sword: This is war.

[brucewaynehater101]

HELLO LOVE <3333 kissing all ur posts on the head I'm loving loving the things u do on here !!! WOAHS !!! LIKE U ARE SO CREATIVE AND COOL bringing u silly flowers !!! Getting u a silly bouquet bouquet

:0 actually, I also wanted to hear what make you like Tim !!! What specifically makes him tick for you, what nuances you'd like people to understand about him and his story etc etc !!! I love hearing ppls interpretations (esp since I... myself am not particularly fond of him ;-; but !!!! I do do want to understand what makes people love him) so if you wouldn't mind :D that'd be swell to hear !!!! THANK U DEAR

You're so sweet, my lords. Thank you ^^ I appreciate the bouquet 💐

Also, I completely understand why some people don't like Tim. His 90's era chaotic self is fantastic, but also a bit misogynistic. DC also likes to throw him in every comic that has a Robin in it and try to smother him back into that role. I haven't seen this happening, but I've also heard that Tim fans can be assholes.

So yes. I 100% understand why some folk aren't the hugest fans.

Tim, for me, though, is so dear. Few reasons why:

His story is so fucking sad, my lords

His attitude is hilarious

He's badass and chaotic

He reminds me too much of my younger self

All the Bats are tragic. Ain't a single one who isn't. I typically like BAMF tragic characters.

Tim's story as Robin is fucking devastating. Hit after hit after hit he takes. Yet, he keeps going. I would not have survived what he did.

All the other batkids have sad stories, hilarious wit, are badass, and cause chaos. They share those wonderful qualities with Tim.

I also just really love how Tim's relationship with Bruce is different during his initial years as Robin (with only Steph and Duke being comparable). He wasn't Bruce's kid first. Tim didn't want nor need a parent. He also felt like he had to help Bruce (when a kid shouldn't be taking care of adults. Parentification sucks ass).

Tim became Robin for Bruce. The other Robins became Robin for themselves (which isn't bad! It's actually really rad how Robin helped them [and cursed them but whatever]).

Just... Tim didn't want to be Robin initially, and that strikes a chord. Then there's him working his ass off for that mantle. He's a little shit, but he's Tim.

There's also how YJ is treated by the other heroes.

There's Tim living in Jason and Dick's shadow.

It's the likeness to my younger self that really hits home.

If you don't want any personal details, the bottom line is that a lot of his history/characterization hits home.

Now... Tim is dear to me due to how much he resembles my younger self. I love Jason as well due to him representing more of my older self. However, Tim's thought processes are closer to mine. I also tend not to get angry often.

For history, my parents consistently chose work and alcohol over family. I had to take care of them. I often played mediator, family clown, or scapegoat (which is why I also relate to Jason [I go feral at those horrendous lines Bruce says to him. Have your parents ever stated regret for how they raised you? Have they ever hurt you and demanded you thank them? Fucking hell, Jason. I may not have died, but your relationship with Bruce is killing me]). I was considered "gifted" or smart in comparison to my siblings, despite them being extremely intelligent (they were in honor classes as well). I'm the middle kid, but I emotionally took care of my younger sibling after I turned fifteen (even though we used to get into horrendous fights).

Anyways, Tim has a pathetic mess of a background, but he's badass as well. He's self-sufficient because he had to be, and he's good at it.

I like smart characters that outwit their opponent. I like seeing Tim win.

[alfredsolos]

Among us Batfam fans, not all of us love every single member.

Some of use don't like Jason, Dick, Bruce etc.

And naturally, there are people who don't like Damian. Be it his personality or his difference from the previous Robins. This is perfectly normal, you don't have to like Damian or any other Batfam member. For example, I don't really like Bruce's personality and his treatment of his kids. (Although that's mostly DC's fault not Bruce)

But there are certain types of people in the fandom that just loathes a character. And most of the time, this character is Damian. And as a person whose favorite is Damian, this irritates me to say the least.

People don't like the fact that Damian is different, and in their mind, not what a Robin should be. They think that Robin should be the light to Batman's darkness. Which is problematic on it's own, but I won't get into that.

They don't like his bluntness which is often percieved as rudeness (I know there instances where he is rude on purpose, but most of the time it's just him being brutally honest.)

No matter how much these haters deny it, Damian is very capable. He is very smart both academically and in-life. He's a good strategist. He can get himself out of bad situations as easy as getting himself into one. He bested his mother in combat at the age of 10 to learn the identity of his father. He was able to tell who his father was, just by reading his body language (In which Bruce was in Brucie mode). He can manipulate his voice to sound as whoever He wants. He is brave and almost fearless. He is not afraid of higher authority and has wicked wits.

Of course the haters don't care for any of that. The probably don't even know half of these actually happened. Maybe they never even opened a single issue of a comic.

What they're focused on is: He's rude to the other members, he is the weakest of the Batfam and gets his ass handed to him, he is an egoist and aggressive person, he is unwanted and so on...

And when you point out that what they're saying is just what they think and percieve of Damian, and not real facts or when you try to show them examples of him being good and a capable fighter they just deny it and go back to just hating him for nothing.

Like I said before in the beginning, it's totally okay to not like a character. For example if you're a Tim Drake fan you may not like Damian because he tried to kill Tim or said rude things to him.

But with that you have to acknowledge that Jason did the same thing. He beat Tim in the Titans Tower and tried to kill him in Battle For The Cowl. Or that time when Bruce punched Dick. Or that time when Jason shot Damian. Or when Steph hit Tim on the face with a brick and so on...

We need to understand that the current Batfamily is very disfunctional and often times hurt each other. So hating on a character for attacking your favorite one is kinda dumb because they all fought each other at one point.

And so what is the other reason why people hate Damian? His personality.

Yet again this rant is for the people who hate him almost religiously and can not have a conversation about him without bashing him.

(It's totally okay to not like his character and instead focusing on your favorite characters without having the need to bash him.)

This is not very well known but Damian technically has 3 origins.

1) His first appearance, in which Damian was given up for adoption by Talia the moment he was born. We don't really know anything of this origin so I can't really say anything of this version of Damian. But what I can say is that this version would be a lot different than the canon one and he would just be a normal kid.

What we need to focus on is the other two versions.

2) The version that was/is considered canon which was written by Grant Morrison. This version of Damian was raised in the League by trainers. This Damian did not meet Talia until he was 8 years old. So he was more intense and aggressive than the other 2 versions. This is also the version who tried to kill Tim and brought a severed head to the cave.

Now think of a kid who was raised and brainwashed in this cult where he had to kill people, learn advanced academic lore, train and master in multiple martial arts, learn to be obedient but also respected. Imagine this kid growing up and doing these things without having a single parental figure that showed him an ounce of love. Where everyone he interacts with is either scared of him or is meant to train him brutally to make him the best. Imagine this child not knowing the fact that the reason why he was trained like this is not to become the Demon's Head or an assassin, but to be a vessel for Ra's when his body starts rejecting the pit. This was a kid raised to die while suffering his whole life. This is the kid who was killed by his own mother. A 10 year old child that was sent to Hell.

And the last version:

3) Tomasi's version of Damian Wayne. This Damian has a different backstory than the other two. He was raised in the League just like the second version but with a difference. Talia was there. So although he was raised in this violent cult-like place, he had the (somewhat) love of a mother. There are canonical instances shown to us where Talia tells him stories and so on. This is the version who canonically referred to the other assassins as his brothers. This is the version who cried after killing the Bat Dragons. This the version who cried at the death of Alfred. He is the one who cried for Dick when he was shot.

Excluding the first version, the other two encountered very traumatic things in their lives and as a response grew up to be cold and blunt to survive that kind of environment.

So when a Damian fan responds to questions as to why they stan him despite his personality with "Because he is a child.", they don't really have to say anything else. Because that's what he was.

An abused and traumatised child. And honestly, we don't really need another reason for liking him.

Even Tim -whose some fans hate Damian for what he did to him- tells and believes this.

"You were just a kid"

[thevioletjones]

Listen, the DNC fucking nailed that convention so hard, I'm positive we're gonna win.

The party platform they laid out is immaculate. The stark contrast in messaging from that of the party of loveless, bigoted, weirdo, grifter, ghouls couldn't be more plain.

Somehow, in just 4 days, the Dems have officially become the party of family values, in addition to being the party of equality and inclusivity. It's actually surreal to those of us old enough to have slogged our way through many contentious election cycles and decades of hypocrytical myopic bullshit foisted upon us by old-fashioned post-Reagan conservatives.

The selection of Tim Walz as VP turned out to be masterful. Next to him, JD Vance looks even more pathetic and stupid than he already did. The men on the republican ticket are fundamentally incapable of acting like the informed, caring adults on the historic democratic ticket.

I'm disappointed in the youth on social media as usual. As an elder millennial progressive, I have always been further left than the tickets I've voted for and the administrations I've supported. Even my favorite politicians have done things I don't like or agree with. But that's the way it is. It's something we as voters and citizens do not have full control over and never will.

I believe in a free Palestine and I in no way condone the US involvement in supplying Israel with weapons in an unjust war. I also am not a fan of the barely disguised antisemitism that's permeating that cause, and I'm smart enough to know that the entirety of the conflict is much more complex than the last year's news cycle. You can seek out documentaries by credible news sources (like the excellent Vice News program previously aired on HBO and other cable channels) that detail bothe the history of Israel, the history of Palestinian struggles, and the history of the US relationship with Israel, and what that territory means to the different religious factions that want it for themselves (and how sects of Christianity have been indoctrinated into the cause of gaining it for themselves).

The thing is that this election isn't about that relationship or that conflict. It's not about anyone else's country. It's about ours.

I'm American, but I grew up in Venezuela. They just had a big election there that resulted in a steal from a dictator-like unpopular president. But unlike ee did with Trump the first time he lost, they can't actually get his ass out of the presidential palace. Chavez and Maduro have ruined that country with the same anti-democratic tactics that Trump would love to employ and pushed millions of citizens to emigrate from the country.

None of that is about the US either.

My point being, every country on this planet has it's own problems that for better or for worse, we have to largely leave in the hands of the citizens of those nations to resolve.

This is your opportunity to continue the slow correction of the path we've been on in America since Clinton and Obama. It's a slow march towards progress that keeps getting stymied and dragged back, then pushed a little bit forward again. These moderate liberals are the only vote we have that will ever possibly lead to a truly progressive hero and champion. You know, most likely someone in one of our generations.

Millenials and Gen Z have a lot in common, but as the older of the two, I'm telling you, only time and experience will prove to you that you can't have everything in one candidate or even an entire party, and wasting your ability to actually make a difference for noble ideals that won't make an actual difference to those lives you think you're trying to save is illogical.

Israel will not stop bombing Gaza because you sat out of a US election, or because you protested the DNC, or protest voted 3rd party.

Until the system is overhauled, there is no point in 3rd party voting. Of course we should have more than 2 options. We don't.

Anyway....... I am joyful this week.

I still can't believe Grandpa Joe actually got pushed out of the nomination. They are taking this swift shift to Kamala Harris and running Sha'Carri Richardson fast with it.

Get on board.

It's nice not to feel doomed all the time. I don't even care if it's partially an illusion. I know the alternative is a living nightmare that needs to end.

[naquey]

PJO x Batman(Batfam)

Alfred Pennyworth: Alright, first things first. This man would be Chiron. In a heartbeat. At first I was thinking Dionysus, but Bruce fits more with Dionysus. He's reliable, considerate, and lends a helping hand if the kids ever need it. Also a horse bottom half would be fucking awesome. Alfred could kick so much butt.

Bruce Wayne: Dionysus. He is camp counselor. He is the dramatic one. He would fuck with the kids by saying he's their father, just so they could get him whatever he wanted. He holds no malicious intent behind this, and only wants to mess around with them. He will apologize if it hurts some of the kids. AND he is a dramatic emo. Case in point.

Dick Grayson: When I think ab him the first thing I see in my mind's eye is acrobat. Responsible older brother, dutiful, chaotic. At first I was thinking Athena, but THEN I was like wait- someone else is Athena's son. Not that Athena can't have two sons but it don't fit. He's Apollo's son. Ball of sunshine, can hold a wicked good tune, and kicks ass. A punch you least expect from someone who is so nice and kind.

Helena Wayne: Her dad is literally Dionysus, so people underestimate her. She's seen as the party girl, the rich spoiled kid who can't defend herself. Then next thing you know you're in the infirmary because she knocked you out. She is a theater kid like her dad, and tends to instill madness into those that go against her, sort of driving them insane. If they don't get medical attention right away. It pisses people off when she plays the part of a helpless rich girl and then suddenly has a powerful punch. But she is a good contender for Artemis.

Barbara Gordon: How can she not be Hermes daughter? She has the brains and the wits, but is in the background feeding all the Bats information. She keeps things running and helps Bruce not burn something to the ground, also helps Alfred keep his sanity. Technically, she could be considered camp counselor with how well things are run under her guidance and advice. She may have all the information, but only gives certain bits out for free. She also has hella blackmail on her family if they ever decide to cross her.

Jason Todd: Hella Ares vibes at first, but beneath that this man has strategy. Don't let his blind hatred for Joker fool you, he knows he has to understand a battle first and foremost. His loathing for Joker only gets in the way with clown related things, but he truly is Athena's son. He's well read and observes a battlefield, pointing out many vantage points so he can stay out of line of sight until the perfect moment.

Kate Kane: Artemis' daughter. She hunts down her enemies, and sticks to hiding in plain sight. She may not use a bow, but she has other ways to hunt her target without one. Quiet and strong, able to keep herself hidden until she can properly attack.

Tim Drake: Athena's son, like Jason. He's known as the one who comes up with the plans and often gets the others in the family to excecute him. He's the brainiac. It's known at a young age he found out who Batman and Robin were. He looked up to Batman. He followed Batman. He used detective skills to figure things out that adults hadn't even tired to. He's the mastermind. No, Babs is.

Turner Hayes: Aphrodite's son. He's pretty and uses that to his advantage. Others think he's the spoiled adopted son of Bruce Wayne, but he is nothing like what the media says about him. Regardless of how he may look he is rather cunning and smart, but it's hidden beneath a pretty face. The police didn't believe he was doing detective work because he didn't look like someone who would be able to do that, and they were wrong.

Stephanie Brown: Steph is trying to prove herself. She may not be seeking revenge, but she believes that she needs to prove herself in delivering justice like the rest of her family. Nemsis' daughter. She believes in doing the right thing, even if the right thing at that moment seems like the worst thing someone could do.

Harper Row: Nemesis' daughter. She doesn't feel right living in a world where there are bullies around. Harper wants to take down as many bad guys as she can to keep the streets safe for Gothamites. She seeks retribution and vengeance, trying to save others much like she saved her own brother. Her brother Cullen, is who drives her forward.

Cassandra Caine: Her strength is seeing things that others cannot, i.e. body language. Hypnos' daughter. Cass can read a room and understand immediately what is going on. Her sight is her power. She was taught to be an assassin that looks but never speaks. Able to use that to her advantage to get a one up on those she is fighting or going against.

Damian Wayne Al-Ghoul: Son of Nike(and Dionysus). His goal is victory, in anything. He trains hard and strives to be the best at what he does, Damian does not take second place. He believes he can only achieve something if he is the best and most powerful at it. That is why he stays in the Nike cabin to train and hone his skills. (Even if he has a bed at Dionysus cabin.) He doesn't tell people a lot, but he goes over to sleep in his dads cabin. Once in a while. The old man would think he was getting soft if Damian ever told him that.

[gremlin-bot]

Dear God, why do you know that name‽

Jason was going to kill Roy, that orange haired fuck. He had better watch his goddamn back. When he told him that he'd been looking for some low-effort games with romance he could play during the very little free time he had, he didn’t expect to be gifted a bunch of raunchy-ass monsterfucker games.

He hates it even more, now that he's gone and gotten invested! Yeah, the main character can be shitty, but the story and concepts had him hooked!

Who wouldn't be fascinated by the implications of a former death god that tends to their garden! Hikmat deserves better than fucking Allen.

Speaking of the Allen in his life, one Tim Drake was bitching about the plan… again. Sometimes the replacement could be so smart, yet still so fucking dumb. It’s not like he wasn’t going to just go against the plan after the meeting, like he always did.

"Hey, discount Allen, if you don't shut up about the plan-" Jason starts, cut off by Tim slapping a hand indignantly to his chest.

"Allen‽ As in the-'' Tim cries vehemently before cutting himself off. Did… did he get the fucking reference? Jason hopes he didn't but going by that slight glare he was getting, Tim absolutely did.

Well, shit. Looks like his actions have consequences today.

"So, we're just gonna ignore that?" Duke asked the now quiet gaggle of bats. Only to be met with a unanimous yes, it seems like the family is tired of both Jason and Tim's bullshit today.

-----------

Tim has so many questions and frankly, he's not sure if he wants answers to most of them. Finding out that Jason has (probably) played the one visual novel where the main character that looks eerily like him gets dicked down by big hot monster men, was not something he expected would happen during a briefing. And by calling him fucking Allen of all things!

Allen‽‽

Allen was an asshat, but Tim could see Jason's point in calling him Allen. He hates it, but he can see it, even if he would never admit it out loud.

This still begs the question of why Jason plays that game. 

What better way to break the tense silence that leached into the atmosphere? It's not like they had anything better to do during their stake out.

"So Hood, are you gonna tell me why you, (presumably), played the raunchy visual novel with a main character that looks a little too much like me?" Tim asked as he scanned the windows of the warehouse once again.

Jason, to his credit, didn't hesitate to answer.

"I don't know Red, why did you play a raunchy visual novel with a main character that looks a little too much like yourself?" Jason sassed back to Tim, who raised an eyebrow in response

They stared each other down, neither willing to cave. Jason broke first.

"We agree to never speak about Allen again?" Jason proposes. Surprising, but still in line for him.

"Is the rest of the game still up for discussion?" Tim inquired thoughtfully. He hasn't been able to talk about the implication of the game's magic systems with anyone and it drove him a little crazy, he’d take anyone at this point.

Jason scoffed,"Of course!"

"Deal." Tim stuck out his hand, shaking Jason’s. "Okay, so Momo-"

"Of-fucking-course you'd go for him!"

[multifanritz]

How I think each of the batkids react to being sick

Dick: biggest drama queen. His nose is runny one day and he swears he's fine. Then the next his head starts hurting and he's dying. He doesn't get sick often but when he does he goes to the manor and just "UGHHHHH. It's time to plan my funeral. It's over. I'd rather go toe to toe with killer croc right now. Please make it stop."

Jason: he has a short(er) temper when sick. He apologizes right after normally, but if someone says he looks sick he'll say "cuz I'm sick of YOU, get off ASS." (if it's bruce he doesn't say sorry) If it's super important, he'll go on patrol, but he tries not to. He's died once already, he doesn't want to again just cuz he was too tired to see an enemy. He tries to stay at his apartment when he gets sick but Alfred normally can tell when he starts feeling bad and guilts him into staying at the manor.

Alfred: are you really going to make an old man worry over you, Jason Todd? My heart can't take it.

Jason: Alfie, I'm fine I promise.

Alfred: I'll believe it when I see it. Be here in 10 minutes. Your soup will be done by then.

Jason, sighing heavily: yes Alfie

Tim: Tbh I think tim is very careful, especially when he loses his spleen, to not get anything nasty. There r a few times where it just happens, but he knows how to handle it. He just stays in bed all day and catches up and some much MUCH needed sleep

Damian: he doesn't get sick. Or so he says. He's very good at hiding it, so he ends up either passing out from a fever or nearly getting shot from stumbling. But he's handling it, he swears.

(If anyone gets sick in the manor, damian is basically held under a microscope to see if he get infected and didn't say anything)

Steph: I feel like steph literally doesn't get sick. She's one of those rlly lucky ppl that just doesn't. Maybe a cough every now and again, but nothing super bad. If she did ever get sick tho, she'd be worse than dick. Begging to go to the er cuz there's no way this is normal my head is going to EXPLODE

Cass: model patient. Also doesn't get sick often, but handles it very well when she does. She gets a bit on edge tho cuz she doesn't like how unfocused it makes her

Duke: tbh I don't know much about duke but I think he's in the same boat as cass. He just stays in his room so he doesn't get anyone sick. Doesn't go on patrol cuz he knows better. Smart baby boy