#DON'T OPEN PANDORA'S BOX
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Who is putting fanart of THE ONCELER in my Dash.
#will I never be free#stop this madness at once#IT HAS BEEN 84 YEARS#STORY REPEATS ITSELF#DON'T OPEN PANDORA'S BOX#How bad can it possible be#loveapologistrambles
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Do you know this queer character?
Castiel is Queer and Agender or Genderfluid, and uses varying pronouns based on presentation!
#opening pandora's box with this one i've been blissfully unaware of supernatural my entire life and I don't really want to start but#the history of supernatural on this blog already is rough please have mercy#this is the most specific i'm willing to get with labels on this one#8 people submitted him dear lord#castiel#cas spn#castiel spn#spn#supernatural#tumblr polls#fandom polls#poll#queer#agender#genderfluid#varying pronouns#he/him#she/her#they/them#live action#lgbtqia#do you know this queer character
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OPINIONS ON KAIDAN EE/IF???
My honest reaction:
in all seriousness, if you wanna hear me yap about it, more under the cut
warning like, genuinely a ginormous yap, like a HUMUNGOUS, sleep-deprived yap,,, im cursed to be obsessed with skyrim + modded followers instead of touching grass
I think a lot of this is probably gonna be the same thing other people have said, so im sorry
if you feel i'm gonna be bringing up redundant points and get mad at me😓dont read
I haven't experienced and thus won't talk about the versions of EE and IF that are now separate mods from each other. I don't know anything about that.
if they're better now yayyy but this is about pre-separation
I should preface this with the fact that I've played through Skyrim 3 times with different stages of Kaidan EE/IF:
The initial Dawnguard + fixes/miscs mod
Kaidan EE/IF versions before extensive faction/NPC dialogue for Kaidan
EE/IF w/ NPC Dialogue (AKA Fratpack)
I was also part of the two different discords that were purged and created during these intervals. i don't even know if there is a discord currently?
anyway, that is to say that I have experienced the mod and it's behind-the-scenes progress, extensively so I have a pretty good idea of what I liked and didn't like
That being said, I will introduce probably my biggest problems with it: Tonal whiplash
Okay, well the most common complaint is ofc that a lot of the writing is out of character - and I agree. But it's not just ooc on paper, it's his voice too. I swear, it is very jarring hearing hushed, mild og Kaidan 2 voicelines, and then being deafened by EE Kaidan SCREAMING in my ear ALL.THE.TIME. (like... why are you yelling at me rn jeez)
Seriously. I'm not sure why they didn't just re-record everything from the original mod instead of adding more and more contradicting lines on top of the originals. It definitely could have been a standalone mod, and sometimes it almost feels like it is - because he is just so different.
My most infamous moment in my last playthrough with him happened after we defeated the dragon at Kynesgrove. His og Kaidan 2 dialogue played first, in it he shows interest and is cordial about Delphine ("I wouldn't mind prodding her mind" or whatver dialogue), THEN immediately after his Kaidan EE/IF dialogue will play, in which he walks up to Delphine and STARTS YELLING AT HER AND INSULTING HER - like they argue for quite a bit wtf. And it's like, listen, I have my thoughts about Delphine, but whether or not it was okay to yell at her isn't the problem. It would be fine - IF he hadn't just calmly told me he thought she was okay.
It is sooo confusing how he contradicts himself :(
I mean, yeah, fragments of who he is are still there, I can tell it's Kaidan, but he's warped to fit a different character. Like a con-artist Kaidan.
Anyway, besides the contradictions, it also feels out of character because of his established backstory.
Let's go over it: He's an orphan, lost his only connection to his family(his guardian) to drugs, fell into substances himself, joined a violent cult, had to escape said cult, came clean from his addictions, has been traveling Tamriel bounty-hunting, got brutally attacked by the Thalmor, rescued by mere chance. Do you honestly mean to tell me this man would be yelling, pissing, drinking, lewding, and joking his ass off?? After all that???? NO - or maybe not these levels of extreme. (maybe some other dude might, but Kaidan's characterization insists he is a brooding, keeps-to-himself man, even though he never acts like it anymore)
That man should be tired, and he did feel like he was tired in the original. He was more brooding then than he is now, usually silent, but could still have an edge of comedy/wittiness, he was smart, he had been through a lot!
In that regard, EE/IF Kaidan felt like... we are experiencing Kaidan 10 years in the past - like a Kaidan in his early 20s when he was still a drunkard low-key terrible person. He is just so energetic, always yapping - GOD he talks a lot now. ugh but most of the time it wasn't about anything, it was either inside-jokes, meta jokes, and only occasionally did we get things that added to the experience.
For example, I think most of us who have played Kaidan 2 remember at least one specific line he has said while exploring. What comes to mind for me is either "Can you smell the magicka in the air too? Smells like a rainless thunderstorm." or "Watch for the mammoth with the carvings on their tusks, that's how the giants mark their herd." Alright, both pretty nice small talk for characterization (he IS smart) and worldbuilding.
Tbh i can't really remember any iconic lines from the additions of EE/IF Kaidan... the only two lines that stood out for me were: the "elevenses" line from the clip above (started bumping into him every time he was about to say this so he would stfu... total tonal dissonance), and one he said while I looted Lucky Lorenz ("poor sod wasn't as lucky as his namesake would have you believe!") kai HOW do you know this man, and his nickname, who told you that??? (idc about it that much but its like the only other added line i remember)
I thought that maybe his ooc-iness might have been caused due to the collaborative approach of the mod, I think the mod authors created their own perfect Kaidan - and that's good for them! It takes a shit ton of work (Ik cuz i was there!!) But I think the original essence was lost with each addition. It might have been lack of direction for the voice acting too, a lot of the lines might have hit better if they weren't borderline screamed.
Okay, at some point while playing I got so tired of his constant himbo chit-chatter that I tried tuning him out and bringing other npcs from vanilla skyrim as followers. Problem: even without kaidan on your party, everything starts being about kaidan. Because the extension made it so that Kaidan either has history with/character interactions and development with different NPCs from the base game.
The main poor sods that traveled with me:
Erik the Slayer: Apparently was Kaidan's childhood friend, got inspired by Kaidan to become an adventurer. Least egregious in my opinion, they say sweet things to each other. I swear, Kaidan yells more at me than he ever did at Erik.
The Companions: dumb, dumber, and dumbest basically.. This part of EE/IF was also known as "The Fratpack" and y e a h they pretty much had Vilkas, Kaidan, and Farkas acting like immature frat boys all the time. Just,, absulutely taking away all the maturity out of these GROWN ASS MEN. im sorry, i guess i dont get the appeal. I liked it when they didn't behave like teens (Aela im so sorry, you deserved better than being part of this)
Lydia: All she does is simp for him, ALL.THE.TIME. You think she's about to have a meaningful thing to say? nope, she's checking out Kaidan's ass. Think she'll have a deep convo with another npc about one another? nope! she wants them to tell her all about Kaidan. Both the Companions and Erik will either talk down to her or have to deal with her thirst for Kaidan. i had to start leaving her home.
They also suffered from the same tonal whiplash as Kaidan, unfortunately
additionally, the mod added an "early flirt switch" - you could basically toggle Kaidan to start showing romantic affection for the Dragonborn before the amulet of mara., the interactions were good on paper, but everytime he stammered and stumbled over his words it was written in such an unnatural way... pls people don't talk like fanfics lol !!!
I did like that he gave me flowers, my inventory got full of them - but then he noticed how many flowers I had in my inventory and judged me for "picking everything i see" ugh dude you gave them to me, but also even if you hadnt... mind your business lol
Another addition was a feature that basically made it so NPCs could potentially throw flirtatious comments at Kaidan and the Dragonborn (Bishop flashbacks😨)
You can't do anything to defend Kaidan from those comments, but he WILL take it upon himself to defend your honor infront of any men, women, jarls, or criminals that even so much as find you attractive (THIS INCLUDES FARKAS AND VILKAS BTW :( ) by being rude, forthcoming, AND violent. so yea, you can guess the target audience
speaking of which, he definitely comes on too strong on you once you start the romance, and it left a bad taste in my mouth. I specifically picked the "go slow" option for the romance, and the next day or two it was him constantly complaining about having to go slow under his breath, how he wanted to do anything but slow rn... and like just, wow. :/ yikeees lmao
Maybe this is the result of "i can fix him" romance ideals? im sorry but I liked him when he was down to earth
Bonus? He comes with a campsite now, which has to be magic because its ginormous and he somehow lugs it around despite it also coming with a whole ass furnace (fine fine i'll hold my disbelief)
anyway I do like it, its basically a player house you can take anywhere (so long as kai is with you ig) also you can have a cat in there
I like that there is an MCM, I like that the MCM lets you get through the quest stages in case you get stuck
I like that he can guide you places, usually he gets stuck in a tree or rock but its the thought that counts
I think if the mod had continued in the vein as its original iteration when it was just audio/bug fixes and included these qol features it would have been better than it is now.
But it seems maybe i'm just not the target audience, and as a young woman I'm really confused as who the target audience is 😓
okay im srry rant over
if anyone else wants me to yap about other kaidan skyrim things also ask or join in cuz i like yapping about skyrim and kaidan to people!!!
#anon im so sorry you opened pandoras box with that one#my most favorite interest ever so i must yap about it#kaidan 2#kaidan skyrim#skyrim custom followers#tesblr#skyrim#tes v skyrim#kaidan mod#modded skyrim#this new kaidan is evil!kaidan he is evil he does not respect woamen#also please don't judge me for giving him a chance 3 time i thought he'd get better😔#im looking at the workshop version of him with a lil hope but EE/IF disappointed me so bad i cant trust anything anymore#pls just give my man an mcm
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some doodles based on the gender thoughts i've been having about kuroba the past few days, mostly on how their appearance changed between middle school and their final year of high school. i also thought it'd be funny if kuroba didn't get recognized by classmates while they were helping at the flower shop back then, ( foreshadowing ig. )
#i didn't write it on the doodle but kuroba went to middle school in yokohama btw!#they actually attended the same school that their dad is an art teacher at. which i don't think i've mentioned before. he's an art teacher.#i'll make a detailed post about kuroba's gender EVENTUALLY bc i have so many thoughts on it#i will say that kuroba isn't conscious that their gender dysphoria in hs is gender dysphoria until after the fact#at the time they'd just describe it as '' not feeling human '' which is actually a cocktail of gender dysphoria and ->#body dysmorphia + depersonalization related to undiagnosed autism. fun times!#they're really repressing shit in their 3rd year and distracting themself by going all in on getting ready of college#erika coming out to their family while kuro's in their first year of college is what ends up unearthing those thoughts for them again#they're like '' oh i wanna be supportive of my sister so i'll look more into lgbt+ stuff. '' * opens pandora's gay ass box *#okay i'm getting so tired i need to sleep...#mj ocs#oc : kuroba#mj draws#ask to tw
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growing up is realizing that all the "relatable" posts u saw as a teen about not wanting to answer emails weren't just jokes. they were made by someone in mortal peril
#it's not even about reading them#it's about opening your uni/workplace mail in the first place. pandora's box#schrödinger's job. you're not fired if you don't open that email from ur boss
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If Night at the Museum has taught me anything, it's that I'm actually pretty ok with shipping real people together just as long as they're actually wax simulacra of people who no one alive today lived alongside which retain an exaggerated versions of their real-life counterparts' personality and some of their memories.
I will ship Florence Nightingale and Joan of Arc, but only the ones that live in a museum and come to life at night.
#night at the museum#jedtavius#I'd say I wish it became a trend but I don't know what kind of pandora's box I'd be opening
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what's "mha"?
Mha is, dear anon, the "mysterious hrab anon". Fandom lore. It started from hrab, who is a crab with Hannibal's face on it and an amazing fanfiction written by @petrowriting . Then this anon started being hrab's #1 fan and sending cursed hrab asks to anyone and oh god I won't even mention wobster who is a lobster who has Will's face. Just normal fandom stuff.
#i don't want to open Pandora's box again#hides#hrab#mha#hannibal#hannigram#hannibal lecter#will graham#hannibal nbc
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i have not listened to hamilton in like a week why is he STILL HERE
read the tags if you want to see me talk about musicals for a little TOO long
#this is no hate to you mr leslie odom jr#but i have most certainly listened to other musicians/bands more#anyways i'd say the rest is accurate#my bff and i have been doing a musical binge#started with wicked -> ride the cyclone -> shrek -> legally blonde -> falsettos#i cried twice at falsettos btw it's so fucked up (i loved it sm)#i've listened to wicked before but haven't actually *seen* it so that was nice#i've also heard a couple songs from ride the cyclone & falsettos b4 so i already knew they'd be good#and i've seen shrek the musical like 3 times bc i unironically love it#overall opinions: ride the cyclone might have my favorite cast of characters and i think falsettos might be my favorite musical now#fav songs (for funsies):#ride the cyclone: noel's lament / the ballad of jane doe / jawbreaker / space age bachelor man (insane song btw)#wicked: no good deed / popular#shrek: i know it's today / don't let me go / i think i got you beat / this is our story / what's up duloc?#falsettos: this had better come to a stop / i'm breaking down / four jews in a room bitching / a tight-knit family/love is blind#falsettos cont.: everyone hates his parents / falsettoland/about time#legally blonde: blood in the water / positive / ireland / chip on my shoulder / so much better / whipped into shape / take it like a man#legally blonde cont.: bend and snap / there! right there! / legally blonde / legally blonde - remix / find my way/finale#SORRY I OPENED A PANDORA'S BOX WHEN I STARTED TALKING ABOUT MUSICALS#i really should've posted this on my other acc oh well#okay i'm gonna shut up now im so sorry LMAO#falsettos#legally blonde musical#legally blonde the musical#shrek the musical#shrek musical#wicked#wicked musical#ride the cyclone
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Guys I am THISSSS close to uploading art of my old FFI ocs 🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️
#hides and ducks behind tree#there are gen so many#half of them don't even have a name lmao😭#seeing old doodles of them was like opening pandoras box#i'd gen like to make lore around them since they don't have any :)
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Aether has a crush on you! { totally not from Socke c:< }
"I'M AWAKE!" She had to be, sure she fell asleep on a table. But that had to be it - she had to be dreaming to hear that. His focus was finding his sister, she'd help if he asked - so why did that stir some kind of hope if it was true..?
"...I..I gotta be dreaming if it's true.."
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The race fixing allegations do matter because if they're true, it would mean would finish the 2023 world driver's championship in 4th place.
#f1#formula 1#fernando alonso#charles leclerc#and that would open up pandora's box too!#but you know i don't expect anything to change#They're all too corrupt
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The main issue with discourse about crests is how people see it as a cause for inequality with the nonsense about church bad it explains them as gifts of the goddess when
Is there another part anon?
I was loitering on redshit today and saw this sort of argument about the "Church BaD because Rhea said Crests come from the Goddess so she gives a divine right to rule to crested people" and...
Well, save for being a peak example of projecting and ignoring the text at hand...
It's, as you say relatively meaningless in the greater "inequality" scope of things, because, hey.
Kevin Blaiddyd can lift an ox with his pinky. Bob the mailman cannot. Even if Rhea never wrote a thing about the source of Crests... Kevin and Bob wouldn't have been treated the same way : in a world rife with giant monsters and bandits, Kevin's super strength will always be valued over Bob, who doesn't have this super strength, when it comes to protect/defend his people/family.
In a way, writing the Crests come from the Goddess has two results : 1/humans won't try to get their hands on one since, uh, if the goddess gives them, it's as random as it can so, maybe, if you find a person with pointy ears who has a crest, you won't be tempted to, idk, kill it and eat its liver to get a crest
+
2/maybe... it's the one of the only few things Rhea could preserve/salvage from her family and culture ?
The beings who were originally granted crests, aka Nabateans, were created with this power because the Goddess created them as such - "it comes from the goddess" is not technically a lie, Crests come from her blood and were only originally gifted to her children... Humans just happened to get this power by "stealing" it (at least if we're talking about the Elites and their lines!)
Back to projection and "ignoring the text at hands", getting the "divine right to rule" conclusion from this is like me, idk, going to the UK and expecting to find a good baguette :
The Book of Seiros lit says the Goddess is disheartened to see how the power of crests is misused by humans and says Nemesis fell to corruption, basically spelling out how people who have crests... shouldn't abuse it.
Imo, it's not the "divine endorsement" to rule here, but it's much closer to the mandate of heaven doctrine : if you do not rule wisely, the gods will abandon you - the first crested humans did so much shit that Sothis wept and left Fodlan (according to the Book of Seiros!).
As for crest inequality...
Yes, some people are born with super powers, and others aren't. Just like your usual run of the mill genetics that are still used, irl, to discriminate or at least make differences between two people.
"get rid of the system where super powers are valued" is just a nebulous nonsensical leitmotiv that... is completely empty, if you look closer at it.
AG!Sylvain wants to get rid of situation where you will have to use those super powers, okay, why not? But if a Giant Wolf charges at a toddler, and Sylvain with his relic can stop him, but Miklan without said relic cannot - who should be called upon to protect the toddler, or to get rid of the Giant Wolf? Sylvain or Miklan?
Ditto with healing : if Flayn can her special Nabatean Magic to make an AOE area to heal 100 people at once to full HP, when humans require at least 10 healers to cover the same area to heal those 100 people to full HP, who is going to be called to help when available? Flayn, or 10 healers?
Unless you get rid of everyone who has a super power - you can't value something that doesn't exist lol - "creating a world where crests aren't valued" is just, impossible.
FFS, Billy can rewind time, how do you make people "not value" this ability?
#anon#replies#crust system#i know i've mentionned it earlier but#it really reminds me of those first arcs in Black Clover#you basically have a bunch of pointy ears who can use magic#and humans who are jealous kill them all to steal their ability to use magic#how the crap do you make the 'ability to use magic' not valued?#sure crests are dying out in Fodlan's human lines#but the Pandora box has been opened#how to tell humans now that tut tut you shouldn't use those super powers anymore#because it's not fair/just to the ones who don't have them and make people rely on them?#not even talking about Nabateans where crests are their own blood#are we supposed to ask Flayn to stop healing people because humans can't heal as well as she does#so she creates crest inequality?
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I know some autistics are really anxious about the grocery store or making calls, but is anyone like me where opening the mail is weirdly intimidating?
#not a reblog#in the envelope I may not know what it is#but I know where it is#once I open it it becomes a pandora's box of Important Paperwork#that is sure to get lost right away if I don't take care of it immediately#hmm on further thought this may be less the autism#and more the ADHD#adhd
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Brooklynn: What exactly do you like about Yaz anyways?
Sammy: Oh geez, I'll try to make this short and sweet (1/583)
#brooklynn look what you've done#you've just opened pandora's box#like this girl has been giving yaz heart eyes since day one#and you've just given sammy permission to gush about her gf#i hope you don't have any plans for the rest of the day#yasammy#yaz x sammy#yasmina fadoula#sammy gutierrez#brooklynn jwcc#jwcc#camp cretaceous
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for someone who claims to hate programming i sure am eager to start dissecting bg3's code
#opened pandora's box (mod tools)#i'm going to do science that is so unethical#(figuring out where the assets that aren't in the known dev rooms. overworld. or inventories are before they get spawned in)#and also stalking raph prime#there's six instances of him in act one alone#and the one you can loot the armor off of doesn't return to the dev room when he teleports after being attacked#the echo of abazigal also has notably weird behavior in that i have no idea where he is before tav's bloodbath#he's not getting freaky with the three lower city orins or any of the three haarleps in the same room so idk#who knows maybe i'll even fix misfires while i'm at it#if i can find the contents of the vendor tables#to be clear i don't think the built in modding playground is robust enough for any of my needs#happy to be proven wrong though
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not to be serious on main but if there's one thing I learned that I want to pass along to other trans people it's that closeting yourself to appease others doesn't work. I girlmode all the time and yet it's still not, and will never be, enough for people. You wear girly clothes, they wonder why you don't wear makeup. You wear makeup, they wonder why you don't shave your legs. You shave your legs they ask why you haven't just done laser hair removal. No matter how much you pretend for them there will always be something else they deem different.
#vent#i suppose#adding it to the tags because it's my own personal belief: they can tell. subconsciously they know#whether it's a soul thing whether it's a personality thing#they know and that's what sets them off#not your appearance#at least if you transition you'll be happy#but even if you don't transition it seems like no one is happy#the minute you realize you're trans it's over. hiding it is impossible once that small thing clicks#pandora's box has been opened and you can't put your feelings back
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