#Competence (law)
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Sterek Rival Lawyers AU
It's A (Court) Date
Imagine, high-class, Ivy League, hot-shot, attorney Derek comes back from New York to the family firm to take over as partners with his sister after his parents decide to step down. He may not be on the level of his mother yet, but he's cut his teeth against Wall Street wolves and ruthless white-collar sharks. Derek's more than proved himself, so he just can't fathom these small criminal court cases his family is making him take "before he's truly ready" to be a part of the family business.
Enter in his first case. Right out the gate, the state assigned defense is, not only late to court, but also arrives in a flurry of limbs and papers, tripping all over himself, and profusely apologizing to the room as a whole. "Sorry! Sorry! Car trouble!"
The guy is out of breath, tie crooked and hair a mess. It makes Derek wrinkle his nose at the unprofessionalism and the blatant disrespect to everyone's valuable time.
The presiding judge, the Honorable Ms. Lydia Martin, only sighs a heavy sigh, as if this sight is nothing new, and says "Mr. Stilinski, I suggest you don't let it happen again."
Derek is honestly getting annoyed by how easy this is going to be. He could've been doing literally anything else right about now rather than being here going against a common rent-a-lawyer with some Podunk community-college degree. The opening statement for the defense is laughably inept. Full of nervous stuttering, backtracking, running tangents, and babbling. He's still apologizing, trying to assure the jury that he's just having an off-day today.
It's embarrassing to watch.
Nonetheless, Derek goes through the motions, practiced and poised. Examines all the evidence, presenting times and dates, prior arrest records, the works.
During this time, Mr. Stilinski is frantically (and VERY LOUDLY) flitting through a cartoonishly large stack of papers and whispering to his client. Derek has to fight to grit his teeth through his presentation.
Finally, it's time for Mr. Stilinski to cross-examine Derek's client and, unbeknownst to him, the beginning of Derek's long, long spiral of madness for the rest of his career.
"Judge Martin, I would like to move to have this case thrown out."
"Oh?" asks Judge Martin. For some reason, there's an amused smirk, almost fond, tugging at her lips "On what grounds?"
A giddy, almost manic, grin takes over the defense attorney's face just then. "On the grounds that the prosecution's client is full of bullshit."
The judge rolls her eyes and an exasperated "Stiles," slips from her lips, seemingly against her will. (Derek's not really surprised by the familiarity between the two of them. With how often state-assigned lawyers are called to the courtroom on small cases, it wouldn't be too big of a leap to suggest they might be chummy.)
"Respectfully, of course." Mr. Stilinski--er Stiles?--winks back at her.
"Objection. Your honor, this is ridiculous."
"Overruled. Make your point, Stilinski."
"Mr. Davis says he saw my client at 12:30 P.M., on August 4th, attempting to take his back-right hubcap outside his apartment. Mr. Davis' apartment complex at that time, on that particular day, would have cast a huge shadow over the back lot as evidenced by the gaudy sundial-art-installation outside the courthouse. Meanwhile, my client's picture, when taken in for questioning, has a sunburn on the entire right side of his face. This would corroborate Mr. Lyle's story of walking home alone, down the upper, unshaded side of Elmore Street, during one of the hottest days of the year, for an hour straight. Also, the fact that Mr. Davis has no realistic idea how long it would actually take a person to steal a hubcap should be evidence enough."
"Uh-huh. And this wouldn't happen to be something you've ever had any expertise in, would it, counsel?"
"I plead the 5th."
And just like that, Derek's case is thrown out so quick, he's still reeling about it all the way home.
For the next two years, this becomes Derek's life. This man, this Stiles Stilinski, keeps showing up like a whirlwind and absolutely puts him in his paces.
Stiles, as he insists Derek call him, is a powerhouse. Relentless and unstoppable. That mouth can filibuster for literal hours (which, for those unfamiliar, is when someone legally cannot be forced to give up their time on the floor as long as they can keep talking), that brain quick as a whip, with a hunger for research, a mastery of the English language svelte enough to trip up even the most well-rehearsed lie, and an attention to detail like nothing Derek has ever witnessed before. It's like he knows every law inside and out. Lives it. Breathes it. It's like he had been raised on the law his whole life. Not only that, it's like Stiles enjoys it. Every case is a new game to get excited about.
All of it makes Derek's blood boil.
However, it's not always about losing to Stiles all the time, because, honestly, that might be less humiliating.
In truth, when faced against Stiles, Derek's bound to win about 60% of the time. Out of that 60%, only 5% of those wins actually feel earned. As for the other 55%?
He knows Stiles is letting him win.
Derek can't prove it, but he knows the asshole is holding back on purpose nearly half the time. Knowing that Stiles could have beaten him if he wanted to, but didn't, is somehow more frustrating than just losing.
He hates Stiles.
He hates that the guy is so chipper and playful all the damn time. He hates that Stiles could probably work at any firm he wanted, could make enough money to get a decent car that doesn't shit out all the time, could buy a proper-fitting suit, but instead CHOOSES to stay here "watching out for the little guy", as he so put it.
He hates that facing Stiles in court is the most challenged, the most motivated he's ever felt in his entire life. He hates that Stiles brings out in him the spark of passion and drive Derek had long thought had died. He hates that Stiles always tries to banter with him during recess or whenever they have to exchange evidence.
He hates finding out that Stiles only loses cases on purpose when his endless amounts of research points to the defendant actually being guilty of horrendous crimes, because Stiles is a good fucking person.
He hates Stiles' constant teasing and he hates that Stiles is somehow able to bring Derek down to his childish level to tease back. He hates how much he looks forward to court-dates with Stiles now. He hates being invited out by Stiles over and over to grab a bite together after a long day, as if Stiles hasn't been wiping the floor with him on this case for the last month. He hates it even more that he always accepts and that now they have their own designated booth at the diner across the street. Derek's so unbelievably frustrated, it makes him want to bite Stiles at the neck just to hear that smartass mouth squeal.
"Hey, I ever tell you I was thinking of quitting before you arrived?" Stiles asks one night as they're walking to their cars.
Derek's head immediately snaps to him at that. "What?"
Stiles smiles distantly at the thought. "Oh, yeah. Things had started feeling like being trapped in a cubicle, y'know? There wasn't any challenge in it anymore."
"What made you stay?"
"Well...you did. You were the first, serious competition I'd faced in a while. It wasn't a matter of winning just to win, anymore. Going against you always reminded me of the reason why it was important for me to win. It gave me stakes, because now there was an actual chance I could lose and an innocent person could go to jail. You, I don't know, kinda reignited my passion for fighting the good fight, I guess."
Derek can feel his heart thumping hard in his chest. He wants to say 'You did the same for me!' He wants to tell Stiles that he didn't think his life could ever be this fun or happy or messy or chaotic or exhilarating or challenging or fulfilling before coming to Beacon Hills.
But just as Derek goes to open his mouth to sing Stiles' praises, he instead finds himself roughly shoving him up against the Camaro and biting hungrily at that mouth and tongue that's been the bane of his existence. There's a surprised little squeak that Derek quickly swallows up, but it isn't long before they're both tearing at each others' clothes and fucking each other dirty in the backseat of Derek's car.
What's crazy is, after they get together, nothing in their careers really changes. The only difference is now they get to fuck each others' brains out after an intense battle in court (and the sound Stiles makes when Derek bites him is exactly what he always imagined it would sound like). They still face against each other on opposite sides in court. They still give it everything they got, no conceding even if they are dating now. Not to mention, Derek wouldn't dream of tempting Stiles over to his firm. Not when he knows Stiles is at his best staying where he's at.
The day Derek's family finally decides it's time for him to take over the firm with Laura is the best day of his and Stiles' lives.
Not only does Derek tell them he's declining, he hires Stiles as his attorney to negotiate terms against his entire family of well-seasoned lawyers.
The entire month-long negotiation results in Derek, not saying a single word, but absolutely beaming as he watches his boyfriend run circles around his mother, his father, his uncle, and both of his sisters on contracts. It's so unbelievably hot, they're banging on whatever flat surface they can get their hands on every time they leave the boardroom. There's even one very memorable blowjob in the empty hall outside the boardroom when Stiles somehow manages to get Peter to agree to a (most likely illegal) clause dictating the firm will pay Stiles a finder's fee for any pro-bono case Stiles takes on outside of Beacon Hills that strikes his fancy.
And, no one says it, but they all know Derek definitely, 100%, dragged his own firm through this negotiation just to show off how incredible Stiles is to his family and preen about it.
--
Fast-forward, Derek is going to be in the audience for the first time for one of Stiles' cases.
While waiting in the hall, Derek sees a familiar face from his New York days. The prosecution has hired the eighth best lawyer money can get, Jackson Whittemore. He's sporting a Rolex, sunglasses indoors, and the face of someone who thinks he's above literally every other person in town.
Well, at least until he sees Derek.
For some reason, Jackson seems to think Derek is all the way out in the middle of nowhere to 'watch a master at work' (which...well...is technically true...).
As Derek goes to sit in the audience, Jackson tells him in passing, "This'll be over so fast, probably won't even get a chance to learn the other guy's name."
Derek chuckles and says back, "Ooh, buddy, you have no idea."
Before Jackson can think more on that, a whirlwind of limbs and papers suddenly hurls through the doors.
Derek sits back, gets comfy, and waits eagerly for the show to begin.
My first moodboard. Hope you enjoy. AU based on a discussion with @casually-eat-my-soul (I suggest checking out their version). This was kind of like a divergence from that (the brain juices just started flowing).
#sterek#lawyer au#negotiating terms as a form of foreplay#Derek might have a competency kink#Stiles' contract states the firm will pay his salary without influencing his decisions as a shadow employee and his clients pay nothing#He's also allowed to travel anywhere he wants for a case on company dime#Unbeknownst to Derek most of the Hales had at one point in time all faced off against Stiles in court before#The only reason Derek was called back from New York in the first place was because they consider a 'Stiles Case' a rite of passage#“Getting Stiles'd” is something all Hales must go through to be humbled#The Hales call Stiles The Reaper in private behind closed doors#No one thought Derek would end up marrying the Boogeyman the insatiable nightmare creature that haunts the Hale name#And now they have to live with this court goblin as their new inlaw#For those who don't know pleading the 5th is enacting your right to not reveal information that could get you in trouble with the law#meaning Stiles has definitely stolen a hubcap off a car before which may or may not have been a police cruiser#Also pro-bono means a lawyer choosing to represent a client free of charge as a form of charity#They absolutely fucked nasty after Derek got to witness Stiles smear Jackson's smug career across the pavement#teen wolf#derek hale#stiles stilinski#tyler hoechlin#dylan o'brien#mieczysław stiles stilinski#minific
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fleshing out my Relativity Au some more, i fujking love these guys, they're so-
part 1/ part 2
#v's art#gravity falls#relativity falls#dipper pines#older dipper pines#mabel pines#older mabel pines#gravity falls fanart#they're in their upper 40's#we'll say they have an older sibling who gave birth to the stan's mother#bc twin genetics are passed down through the women :)#source: my family + my twin uncles on my mom's side of the family#dipper wasn't necessarily acting on as much hubris as ford#more genuine curiosity#and his reaction to getting reality shifted was “damn that's crazy”#“let me go get an adult to handle this”#cue the montage of him studying interdimensional law bc he has to represent himself in space/time court#smashcut with a montage of mabel commiting every conceivable OSHA violation possible while setting up the shack#she leans into the medium side of the business#copying what Caryn did on the phone when they were younger#but falls in love with the theatrics of it all#its not really a secret that its all fake#but her enthusiasm really sells it#its a different vibe from the stan twins bc dipper is just clever not genius level (and mabel is also smart just differently)#they're not competing as much bc gender difference (its more jealousy)((they swap later))#and theyre both fundamentally devious little shits who love a good scheme#so when dip gets home and he sees his sister for the first time running a scam wearing his name he goes “bet” and steals her's right back#there's no “leave these kids alone” its “oh thank goodness tag you're it bitch”#they fall back into step like they never left each other
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I love all of the 'quietly choosing the safety of his loved ones over his own comfort' moments Vegeta gets in Super, but especially when they're Vegeta comedically getting dragged into things he didn't sign up for
I'd forgotten that the three year thing was indeed in the manga too aklsdjas but Vegeta was so pressed about it and I need that version of the conversation with Bulma
'-So we're going to train for three years'
'Three years?!'
'It'll only be three days for you'
'Oh, okay have fun :)'
'I will not :)'
#dbtag#silly hours#bulma like 'three years? with goku? will you be okay?' and Vegeta like 'No! thank you so much for asking'#Bulma: If you didn't want to compete why did you agree to do the tournament?#Vegeta: I didn't.#Bulma: Then say no?#Vegeta: I can't. Beerus might blow up the earth if we lose#Bulma: ...Aw :) <3 Look at you and your priorities#Vegeta: Don't aw me yet. There's still plenty of time for me to kill Kakarot in the chamber.#Vegeta: Then *I* get to blow up the earth. As a reward.#Bulma: And you will have earned it#Vegeta: THANK you#asjfkla i just think their relationship is so much fun when it's got the 'you and me just us and your friend steve' energy#Bulma and Vegeta arguing over whose fault Goku is -- He's Bulma's bestie but he's Vegeta's rival so he's equally both their problem-in-law
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One Piece Supernova trio Omegaverse idea my brain is milling over instead of letting me sleep:
Alpha!Kid challenging/goading Beta!Luffy in order to 'impress' the unmated Omega!Law, possibly not even wanting to attract Law as a mate just dumb hindbrain posturing kind of stuff.
Luffy not caring about designations or romantic/sexual relationships but fully responding to the challenges/goads because he's dumb and competitive like that.
Law being completely aware of the actual intent behind Kid's challenges/goads but now Luffy's turned it into a 'who's the better captain' thing he's also responding to them in a competitive way.
#Supernova trio#eustass kid#trafalgar law#monkey d. luffy#One Piece#One Piece omegaverse#omegaverse#Ramblings of the Goddess#Kid effectively trying to like puff out his chest and Show Off for the omega#by proving himself Better than the beta#only to end up in a yelling match with the omega and beta#and not even in like a foreplay way like Zoro and Sanji do#no this is fully serious competative yelling over whose the better of the three of them#Not that I think he would know what to do#if Law actually showed interest because this isn't actually about attracting Law#it's about showing off for the omega... who happens to be Law#Look he's not the one that holds the braincells of this trio often#He's not thinking with the upstairs brain#he's also not thinking with the downstairs brain either#he's thinking with the gland that sits right at the base of his brain#that's telling him he's gotta Fight and Be The Best#it's telling him it because of the omega#but he doesn't actually care about that bit just the Fight and Be The Best bit
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Btw if you come on holidays and stay at an AirBnb instead of an actual registered hotel I hate you personally. Not "I hate the gentrification and touristic massification and the way we can't live in our homes and are forced to move away because of tourism" in an abstract way- No, not just that. I hate you.
#I'm from a seaside town that has become popular with tourists who come for the beach and the mediterranean climate#and the typical whitewashed walls of mediterranean coastal towns#in just a few years the average rent has gone up so much that now the average rent id#*is over 1000€ per month#one thousand!#that's a whole salary!#in the past 2 years they've been building a new neighbourhood. they've destroyed the vinyeards to make a new neighbourhood that will make#the town 1/3 bigger than it is. that's a lot. but all those houses are luxury houses with private swimming pools for rich foreigners (we#already have 2 private British schools high schools and college(in the british sense)/baccalaureate where their kids go and never have to#interact with locals. I teach some of those kids and they're very prejudiced against locals and very bigoted against the catalan language#(which ofc they never bother to learn)#there's a law in catalonia that says that for every certain amount of houses you build you are obligated to build a certain percentage of#affordable housing. so in this new neighborhood they built the bare minumum affordable housing which is still too expensive for us#and since there's so few of them everyone is competing to get them. the city hall and the bank have had to make an official competition for#them but you only classify if the renr would not be more than 1/3rd of your salary which is impossible. my cousins who are in their mid 30s#and have been working a good qualified job for 15 years (and their partners too) are considered too poor to be considered for the#affordable housing#everyone is having to move out to other cities away from their friends and family and current jobs. the only jobs left here soon will be#mostly directed at tourists#and the only way to continue living here if you're a normal person and not rich is if you're an only child who one day might inherit the#parents' house#but we look around at what's happening in nearby cities and we see the next step which will be airbnb taking the houses that are left#in many places (I've posted about thia before) there aren't any flats for rent or sell anymore that isn't an airbnb#I'm still lucky in my town when compared to other places like Barcelona which are already full of the airbnb plague#actualitat#airbnb#tourism#touristic massification#gentrification
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Cant want for this person to realise that breeders also make others people's dogs, rear them, and lay experiential foundations that will follow them for the rest of their lives
#not too long ago there was some debacle because a puppy buyer wanted to change the name of their dog#post registration/delivery and the breeder was like.....no?#and the people flipped their fckn shit#like threatening law type of flipping their shit iirc#its just a piece of paper my dudes#like yeah this breeders naming habits are over the top but theyre also completely harmless and unless you breed or compete#(which these buyers were not looking to do)#you will hardly see or hear the registered name ever again#the privilege of a breeder is to get to put stupid harmless things on a piece of paper#get over it
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Transing to compete against women is not for mediocre male athletes now.
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/world-news/2024/12/11/trans-firefighter-qualifying-exams-changing-sex
Firefighter ‘jumps’ queue in qualifying exams after changing sex to become woman
Firefighter failed examinations as a man but was admitted as a woman
By Graham Keeley in Madrid 11 December 2024
A firefighter has been accused of jumping the queue to qualify by becoming a woman during exams to take advantage of lower pass marks required by female candidates.
Named only as David L Y, the firefighter initially failed to pass the examinations when they were a man but then said they were changing gender. David was later admitted as a woman by Madrid city council.
Lower marks are required for women than men to pass the examinations to become firefighters in Spain because of differing physical strengths between the sexes.
Raul Asenjo, another applicant, initially qualified to become a firefighter, which usually signifies a job for life.
However, when David was moved from place 201 to 101 in the ranking of candidates, it meant Mr Asenjo failed to qualify.
Controversial law ‘exploited by men’
Mr Asenjo has claimed that this was a case of alleged fraud and is considering taking legal action against Madrid council, which is responsible for recruitment of the city’s fire brigade.
He pointed out that before changing sex, David had been part of a WhatsApp group for Men Who Go Their Own Way, an anti-feminist and misogynist group that advocates that men separate themselves from women.
It is the latest case involving Spain’s controversial so-called “Trans Law”, which was passed last year in an initiative pioneered by the far-Left Podemos party, the junior partner in Spain’s Left-wing coalition government.
Under the law, anyone can switch their legal sex denomination without having to justify the change on psychological or lifestyle grounds.
Critics of the law among feminist groups and conservatives have claimed it has been exploited by some men who were accused of violence committed against female partners but changed sex to avoid legal action.
‘Appropriate measures will be taken’
Mr Asenjo claimed he lost out on a chance to become a firefighter once David said they were changing sex, having failed the theory and practical tests as a man.
Mr Asenjo, 21, from Madrid, said in a statement released to Spanish media: “I was candidate 126, the last one in the list to qualify. However, I have been moved to position 127 so out of the running as the result of the allegedly unfair and fraudulent use of the rules by one of the candidates who has been moved from position 201 to 101.
“This candidate has claimed his status as a woman with the sole purpose of benefiting from more flexible rules [for women] and as such they advance 100 people in the selection process.”
A spokesman for Madrid council said it was investigating the case.
He said in a statement: “The authority warned that this situation could occur after the implementation of the Trans Law.
“The investigation may verify that no fraud took place if this person was legally listed as a woman at the start of the process. If this is not the case, then appropriate measures will be taken.”
In August, a Spanish person was accused of switching gender to avoid trial for threatening their former partner.
The victim’s lawyer described the move, which took advantage of the Trans Law, as “fraudulent”.
A court in Seville which specialises in protecting women from male violence said it could not try the individual, who has a previous conviction as a man for threatening his former partner, as they had since changed their sex to female.
#Spain#Madrid#David LY is another mediocre man who transed to compete as a woman#A man who was part of the Men Who Go Their Own Way will be sharing spaces with women coworkers#Trans Law#far-Left Podemos party#Madrid as a unqualified firefighter now
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Also, I haven't been sucked into legal drama that hard since I read through most of the Kitzmiller v Dover trial transcripts (still publically available!) back in 2009 or so.
I'll be honest, the Mitchell v Jobst trial was a little more condensed, certainly much shorter, and an easier read, but god was the KvD transcript worth it just to read the part where the judge takes over cross examination to personally excoriate a defense witness for blatant perjury.
#I think everyone should read a couple trial transcripts here and there#now and then#I feel like it gives you an appreciation for how the law actually works#the areas where its rigid and the areas where its actually quite malleable#how the popular notion that laws are like a computer where you say the magic words and get what you want isn't true#how generally capable juries and especially a half-way competent judge are at picking up on implication and innuendo and other indirectness
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the kid, law and luffy interactions bring me such joy because it'll just be
captain: no i have to do this stupid thing because otherwise They'll win
crew members: win WHAT
captain:
#one piece#it's even funnier with law because he's the *straight man* serious character whatever#but he has the same stupid captain brain that makes him wantto drive his ship off a cliff#competitiveness is a disease#law is so smart but so horribly stupid i love him#them competing in the middle of a boss battle is truly good for my soul#'mortal danger'? no listen i need to teach these alliance fucks a lesson or else they'll laugh at me later#*derisively* men
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i'm not the biggest lawlu but damn torao stand the fuck up
#he's so down bad what the hell#me when i go to a gay contest and i compete against law#and i lose because he's the gayest fucking thing ever#one piece#trafalgar d. water law#monkey d luffy#lawlu
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ten caps per episode - Law and Order Criminal Intent - s01e10 - Enemy Within
Eames: If I were in this family, I'd probably drink, too.
#a rare appearance by a competent lawyer on this show#lmao#this case had me second guessing myself who i thought dunnit the whole way through#and we get some classic alex one liners#my stuff#law and order criminal intent#goren and eames#ten caps per episode#ten caps: loci#loci s01e10
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I saw this question on the Clock app and decided to bring it to y'all.
#not their messiness y'all#just like skill and competence in their occupation fields of law enforcement#is phupha even a law enforcer?#idk#chief phupha#earth pirapat#atots#a tale of thousand stars#1000 stars#inspector m#manner of death#great sapol#dan#not me#not me the series#fluke gawin#gawin caskey#meng shao fei#history 3: trapped#jake hsu
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"It's not that cold, guys!" Penguin <3
This man is so underloved and I have so much affection for this fictional nerd and basically nowhere to put it all.
His goofy lil North Blue ass would 100% be one of those dudes that runs around in the cold without a jacket and fucks with the whole Polar Tang the second snow starts to fall. He would also absolutely dump snow down Law's pants and happily accept the punishment.
#one piece#haveatthee83#digital fanart#fanfic#my fanart#sketch#drawing#anime#sanji fanart#pretty boy#polar tang#heart pirates#Penguin#one piece penguin#op penguin#penguin one piece#penguin fanart#just lemme crawl into his boiler suit. it's to keep warm I swear#I also rendered this with brown eyes if anyone wants to see that#he would get frostbite before he said he was cold.#he and Shachi constantly compete to see who can withstand the cold longer. Law has had to intervene.#there is a betting pool#Law is secretly running it.#and winning
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i just finished rewatching devil judge with my parents (it took us like 4 months to get thru it..) and i was worried that it wasn’t gonna be as good the second time around and that i would drop it from my #1 kdrama spot… but nope. i just finished it loving it even more.
my dad had the audacity to say “so it was a revenge movie? this could have been done in 2 episodes.”
like no? the character development? the TENSION. the MESSAGE. it needed 16 episodes. hell i would like a season 2 thank u very much.
also how was it even gayer the second time around. like why was gaon, a “straight” man, STARING AT YOHANS BED HAVING A FLASHBACK TO WHEN YOHAN WAS NAKED IN SAID BED. like damn. ok. slay.
i just. love this show so much. it radicalized me. it changed my way of thinking. it is a masterpiece.
i’m gonna go watch lawful husbands edits before i sleep :)
#i have yet to watch a kdrama that competes with devil judge in my opinion#like it’s been 3 years since it aired i think??#and NOTHING has beat it.#even actual gay shows#my fave kbl?#devil judge.#my fave straight kdrama?#devil judge#ugh i love jinyoung.#unlawful husbands#devil judge kdrama#kdrama#yohan#gaon#kang yohan#kim gaon#yohan gaon#lawful husbands
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Thinking on how invasive 2020 online classes were. Why did one of my profs use a software to spy on my IP so he could see if any of the devices in my wifi were attempting to look stuff up during an exam
#im not fucking stupid i just turned the wifi off and used data for that test but im still wondering. wtf gives you the right#who gaf if we cheat on an exam itwas fucking FINANCES that degree competes with law and polsci on most corrupt degrees ever
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