#Bruce knowing more on how to raise kids than Clark is a bit important to me it males their dynamic even more interesting

[littlefankingdom]

It's funny how in fanfics, people write Clark giving parenting advices to Bruce, when in the comics (see: World's Finest: Batman and Superman) and other media (see: Young Justice), Bruce is the one giving parenting advices to Clark, and he is always very serious about it.

After all, Bruce has been a father figure and mentor for longer and more kids than Clark. Of course he doesn't need to call Clark for help to learn how to take care of his kids, Clark is the one calling Bruce for help when he has an issue and Ma Kent is busy.

[robinasnyder]

What I love about this most isn't the normal time travel stuff I love, like future knowledge, but the damn skill gap between the first time Bruce was Batman and now. Because he knows so much, so much that he actually postpones Batman for a month to do some upgrades.

He spends two full days overhauling the Batcomputer to make it a lot closer to what he used to have. He added a ton of notes about what he could remember to the computer the second it was done. He entirely redid his Batsuit so it was stronger, more reinforced and better for his non-fucked up body while also providing extra support for say, his knees and back.

He's actually got a decent work-life balance compared to last time because he has a baby to raise. He'd already started on the playboy bit the moment he got back, and it's super easy to roll into "playboy suddenly has a kid" and just be a dotting father in the press, even if he still pulls dumb shenanigans occasionally.

For a couple months, most of his detective work is just finding out the locations and getting proof bc he doesn't have to investigate what he already knows. He's working more on the police situation and trusts Gordon immediately this time.

He knows about members of the JL but just chooses to not deal with it. They can handle themselves. They did last time.

When Danny is two and suddenly Superman's made his debut, Batman takes a trip to Metropolis to introduce himself. He's kind to Superman, friendly. He tells him to stay out of Gotham unless Batman calls for him, but that Batman will come if he needs help and gives him his number and a JL comm (or what will become a JL comm when the JL comes into existence) .

Superman is so excited and happy, and Bruce lets him in on his identity early. The two even pretend to date for a bit so that Clark can hang out more often.

Danny starts to develop his ghost powers at three.

Superman moves in for a few years to try and help contain Danny's abilities so no one finds out.

Bruce takes Danny and Clark to see Haly's circus when Danny is four. He plans to rescue Dick's parents. Or he means to have Clark do it. He doesn't care how it gets done.

Clockwork freezes him and Clark so that he can't do anything but watch it happen. Clockwork says something about how it's no good to change every event, something Clark hears. Bruce can't give him an explanation immediately because there's a crying, devastated child and Bruce has to help.

He got himself approved to foster ages back, just in case. It's so important for Bruce to be prepared, now more than ever. He's grateful for his foreknowledge, foresight, and paranoia.

Dick never goes anywhere but the hospital, police station and then right to Wayne Manor.

It takes a few days, but eventually, Bruce does explain to Clark what's going on. And he tells him *everything*. He tells Clark about the Justice League, about how Superman dies and comes back, about Conner, about Jon, about Lois. He tells him about Bruce's children, the fights where they stood against each other for, and the ones they fought side by side. All of it comes out.

And then he talks about Clockwork and the deal. And the fact that Clockwork had intervened, which means there are some things that just will happen, and Bruce won't be able to stop it. But he's always going to try.

Dick still becomes Robin, still needs to fight. But he has a new grandfather and two new foster parents and a little brother who calls him "Dididididididi" as he follows along behind him.

Dick is 9, and Danny is 5 when the Justice League forms.

If Bruce was able to beat the JL before when he was still new to all of them, at this point it's easy. He knows them too well. He knows their weaknesses and strengths. Barry and Ollie think he may be a god. Clark tells them about Nightwing, the Kryptonian god of justice and darkness. And then people *really* think Batman is a god, just an alien god. (When Dick takes up the name Nightwing, this doesn't help those rumors at all.)

It suits his purposes.

After a few meetings, Batman calls Captain Marvel to Gotham. He tells him straight out that he knows who he is, he knows he's 9, and also that his own son is 9. He'd always known Billy Batson was small as a child, but seeing him de-transformed, standing on top of Wayne Tower, well, it about kills him.

He takes Billy home, offers him a home or at least safe houses in Fawcett so he can still protect his city, but he doesn't have to be homeless.

Gotham has a lot of unexplained lightnight strikes for about 6 months until Zatara can properly teach Billy how to open teleportation circles.

Billy and Dick get on like a house on fire. Billy thinks Dick's acrobatic skills and self confidence is so cool, and he wants to be just like him. And Dick respects Billy's magic and wishes he could be respected like an adult the way Billy is.

When Billy and Dick are 11 and Danny is 7, Clark finally moves back to Metropolis. All of the boys are heartbroken, but there's no changing it. Clark's in love and wants to marry Lois soon. Clark continues to sleep over two nights a week and is over every day for a little while. This lessens with time, but he never stops being over for multiple hours a week.

Dick starts the Teen Titans when he's 13. Bruce does everything he can to support this endeavor.

When Dick turns 18, he moves out. Bruce tried, but he still has a temper, and so does Dick. Bruce does manage to continue to offer gear. He doesn't ban Dick from coming home. He sends a batch of sweets to Dick's apartment every week. He doesn't try and make him go to college (that much). It's not great, but it's a lot better.

Billy moves out at 18 as well. Because of the way heroing calls him away, he does online classes so he can go at his own pace. He comes home a couple times a week to bake with Alfred and play with his little brother. He doesn't talk to Bruce much, having taken Dick's side in the fight. Plus, Billy is old enough to care for his own city, too. If it weren't for Danny and Alfred, he might not come home at all. (Or at least that's what Bruce is afraid of.)

That same year, in October, Danny wakes up screaming in agony. He remembers how he died. He's starting to get his memories back. And all those powers he had on lock start to go haywire.

One month later, Bruce finds Jason jacking the Batmobile tires.

"Please," he whispers to Clockwork, "does he have to die this time?"

The only answer he gets?

"We'll see."

He brings Jason home.

He calls Dick. He calls Billy. He calls Clark.

He finally lets Dick and Billy in on his big secret. He doesn’t ask them to come home. He tells Dick that he is going to give Jason Robin. He doesn't think he has a choice this time.

He doesn't tell them Jason dies. He doesn't tell them that Clockwork blocked his memories of Jason until he saw him again, so he couldn't try to save Jason's mother. He doesn't tell them about all of their siblings and friends.

Clark heard everything. Besides Bruce, Clark is the only one who knows the full truth. He's also the only one who's been held hostage by Clockwork's machinations.

Bruce couldn't tell the boys everything, as in literally was unable to tell his boys all of it.

He doesn't ask them to come home. He tells them even if he didn't know already what great heroes they were, that he'd know because of everything they've shown them up until that moment. He does ask them to help him with Danny's powers and Jason's abandonment issues.

Neither older boy is happy. But they're smart enough and knowledgeable enough to know that there isn't much arguing with Father Time.

Dick's still bitter about Bruce giving away Robin. Bruce manages to whisper to him that many more people wore the title, and that it was a beautiful legacy, something built on Dick Grayson and his parent's love. It helps the sting.

Jason loves Danny. Danny's grieving a whole life he lost and everyone he loved. He's 14, he's moody and angry and quiet in a way he's never been before. It frightens Bruce. But when Jason's around, Danny loves on him so much. He's two years older than Jason and loves him so much.

Jason still runs away at 15. In the weeks before It's like Jason's having arguments with Bruce that Bruce isn't even a part of. Bruce is begging Clockwork every night to please, this time, let me save him. Please don't make him die.

Jason dies anyway.

Bruce holds his son's dead body and weeps. Clockwork appears at his side.

"Can I have him back sooner?"

"Yes."

"When? Can I just keep his body on ice?"

"No. He needs to be in the ground for it to work."

"Can I find him right after?"

"No."

"Can I find him before he comes back?"

"No."

"What can I do? What use am I?"

"Care for your children. Be patient."

Bruce is just as destroyed as the first time, even knowing Jason will be back. He doesn't bother trying to go after the Joker this time. Clark stays with him, going back and forth between his job and Gotham for a few weeks. He reaches out to the Green Lanterns to try and bring Dick home for the funeral. He's the one who holds Billy when he can't keep up a brave face for Bruce and Danny. He's the one who makes dinner when Alfred can't make himself move for those few days.

Danny is nearly catatonic. He's 17, and his one friend is dead. He'd closed himself off from everyone at school years back. The only person he let in was Jason. And then Jason died horribly, brutally, and practically at Clockwork's hand. Danny doesn't go back to school. He drops out by proxy. Bruce has to help him do everything for a little while. Even when Danny manages to be able to care for himself again, he's so quiet.

Billy, Dick and Clark leave, go back to their lives. Alfred pulls himself together but seems more like a ghost in the manor. (Or better to say that Bruce and Danny are the ghosts, and Alfred can't reach them to help them).

It takes a couple of months, but finally, Danny opens up to Bruce. His silence breaks, and all his fears spill out as gut-wrenching sobs and admissions.

He talks about Dan and the first time he met Clockwork. He talks about everyone he loves dying, him turning evil and killing everyone. When Bruce points out that Vlad doesn't even exist in this universe, that Danny can't become Dan, Danny tells him that he's already older and stronger now than Dan ever was. In his own world, Danny didn't get to exist beyond barely 16. This is the oldest he's ever been.

Danny goes back to his silence, but it's not as heavy. Bruce telling him about how many universes he's seen where Bruce turned evil does help.

Bruce breaks down one evening after beating a couple of muggers far too hard. He hates himself, knows he's better than this, knows what Tim gave up to help him be better, knows that Jason will come back to them, so why can't he keep himself together? Why does this hurt worse somehow? Is it because he knows everything Jason's going to suffer now? Is it because he still can't give Jason what he needs?

That's when a tiny hand grabs onto his gloved hand. There's blood on his glove from the men he'd beaten to the point that Bruce is afraid to check if they're even bleeding. It soils the small hand that squeezes his fingers so tightly.

"I've called the ambulance. We need to go," Tim says to him. "They'll survive, but the police can't see you like this. People can't see you like this."

Batman kidnaps Tim Drake that night. They're both soaked with rain when they arrive to the Batcave. Bruce has to pull off his gloves so he doesn't get blood on the towels, and still has to be careful after that. He gets Tim bundled up, and goes to shower and change.

The surprise on Tim's face when he emerges isn't because he doesn't know who Batman is, but because he couldn't believe Bruce wasn't hiding who he was. But Bruce is so tired of his life and so sick with his own disgust and so, so weak.

"I know who you are. I know you knew who I was. I know you're about to go bother Dick and ask him to be Robin again. It won't work. I know you'll come back here and take Robin instead, because Batman needs a Robin and I'm not able to control myself the way I should be right now. No, I haven't seen you before tonight, even though I've known you're there. You're still my sneakiest child and Damian was raised by ninjas and Danny doesn't need to breath or walk or use doors."

Tim's stunned. He's never heard of Damian, for one. For another, how did Batman know all that?

"Do you have future sight?" Tim asks like the clever boy he is.

"Time Travel," Bruce said. "You were my Robin for a few years, and then you took your own mantel. But you've always been one of my sons. I'm somewhat bound by the contract I signed that let me have a second chance. I'm sorry I couldn't get you before now. I'm sorry you've been alone for so long."

Tim doesn't fall into his arms and sob, but Bruce knows he wants to. He does move into the Manor the next day, and he doesn't move out. Bruce doesn't let Tim live alone this time. He'll make up charges if he had to in order to sever the Drakes' claim to Tim and keep him as his own. He needs Tim too much.

For once, Danny's the one who's pissed. He's pissed because all he sees is Bruce replacing Jason. It's almost laughable, really, hearing Danny shouting the same things (almost verbatim) that Jason shouted at him so many times when he came back.

Danny leaves and he doesn't come back. None of them can contact him. Tim is crushed and offers to leave, apologizes for ruining everything. Bruce holds him for the first time in this world and promises him that isn't true, that Danny's grieving and he doesn't mean it like that.

They don't see Danny again for two years.

Clark's died by that point, and Clark's come back. Superboy's been found. It's cute watching Tim be smitten with the other boy, in a pulling pigtails kind of way.

Clark's prepared for Superboy this time. He accepts him immediately, offers him a place with his wife and son. He tries to help. The two are actually close this time. Bruce is grateful for that. Clark's doing better learning from the past than Bruce is.

One day, not long after Danny's 20th birthday, he shows up through a rip in the fabric of reality. In his arms are a nearly rabid Jason and a surprisingly calm Damian.

"Dad, take this one. Jay and I need to fight this out."

"Try not to break anything important or disturb the bats."

"Got it!" Danny chirps with a wide grin. He's gotten so big. He's not that quiet, broken teenager anymore. He's a man, an adult, and bright and happy the way he was before he got his memories back at 14.

Bruce doesn't know what happened, but Danny's better than before. And Bruce is holding Damian, who's even smaller than he remembers.

"B, what even?" Tim asks, half in and half out of his Robin suit, too stunned to finish changing one direction or the other.

"Meet your little brother, Damian," Bruce says.

"The one raised by ninjas?" Bruce didn't talk about Cass, Damian, or Duke. But he'd let slip about Damian once, and, like always, Tim never forgets.

Damian immediately starts talking about the League and his whole thing about being the blood son. Bruce places a hand over his little mouth, stopping him before he gets too far. Damian's even younger and his eyes fill with fear he can't quite hide.

"I love you all equally. I've been wanting to meet you again, Habibi. It's been too many years since I last held you. At least for me."

"You met me?" The question Damian's really asking is "why did you leave me?"

"In another life," Bruce tells him. "You were a strong partner and one of my beloved children. I'm grateful I get you two years earlier this time."

Damian, who's confused, but who's grandfather is practically immortal, rolls with it and just lets Bruce hold him while they watch Danny poke and prod and goad Jason, flying and staying *just* out of reach. He keeps it up until Jason's suddenly flying too. Jason's nearly frothing at the mouth with rage when Danny starts to lead him on a chase, but the more he flies, the more Danny coaxes him to use ghost powers, the more Jason relaxes.

That's how Bruce learns that the crap that makes up a Lazarus Pit is ectoplasm, and that Jason isn't the same as Danny, but he's halfa too.

When the fight finally ends, and his middle sons land nearby, Bruce hands Damian to Tim and goes and grabs Jason into a bone breaking hug. Jason ends up sobbing into his shoulder before it's all over.

Danny has to take Damian from Tim before he gets too squirmy. And while Bruce is focused on Jason, Danny gives Tim a heartfelt and sincere apology for everything he said. He was hurt and angry, and Tim didn't do anything wrong, and in fact, it seems like he held the family together really well.

Bruce hears about this from Tim later, who's so excited and proud to be recognized for the work he's dond. It hurts Bruce because he knows he leans on Tim too much. It hurts that even Danny can see it. Bruce suggests Tim ask Danny about his old life. After all, Danny knows a few things about having to hold a situation and a group of people, which is and who are, rapidly unraveling and pulling at the seams.

Jason finally gets an explanation, about Bruce's experience in his old life, about the way Bruce failed before, about the way Bruce tried and begged and pleaded and bargained, trying to save Jason, or not bring him into the situation. About Jason having the arguments he had with the Bruce he was before that the current Bruce wasn't participating in. He talks to him about Red Hood and their family and his knowledge that Jason probably does need to go back to Crime Alley and that he is a force for good and that Bruce loves him.

It's healing for both of them.

Jasom stays for a month before he leaves. He lets Dick and Billy constantly hug him and ruffle his hair. He follows Danny around like a duckling all over again. He carries Damian around on his shoulders. He cracks jokes with Tim.

They can't stay like that, but it's a good time.

Bruce refuses to let Damian have Robin at 8. Tim's got it for at least another two, three or four years, thank you very much. Dick, seeing the same trouble he saw last time, takes Damian as his sidekick in Bludhaven. It's not Robin, not yet. But Bruce is grateful, because Damian and Dick's relationship was always so special.

Danny and Bruce talk. Danny gets everything on Cass, Steph and Duke, and collects them early. Bruce couldn't save Barbara from the Joker. He couldn't stop Harvey from becoming Two-Face, he couldn't keep Harley away from the Joker. He couldn't stop people from becoming who they were before. But he could help them sooner, encourage them with what he knew. For instance, he could help Harley and Ivy meet. He could try to talk to Harley about healthy relationships. He could offer understanding that was more pointed. He could save lives he hadn’t managed to before.

He could help.

His body had been honed to a sharp knife back in the old world. But with the amount of experience and skill Bruce started with this second time, the injuries he was able to avoid, he was a much more effective hero.

Then the worst came, the threat that killed so many, including Bruce’s entire family. Well, this time, there isn't the same type of distrust. There's no hesitation.

When Billy's voice is stolen by a magical enemy, he's able to fight in other ways, and manages to steal it back and defeat his foe, when he'd simply been killed before.

When the invasion happens in Crime Alley, Steph and Tim are right there with Jason. None of them die alone like they did before. None of them die at all.

When the monster drags Bludhaven into the ocean, Dick and Damian had already been evacuating people for a while. They aren't trapped with everyone else when the city sinks. They're able to rush back to Gotham when Tim calls for help.

When the invader nearly rips Superman in two, his two sons are there, and able to rescue him so that the three of them can defeat their enemy together.

When Darkseid arrives, Danny is at Bruce’s side, willing and able to be a hero when he's shied away from it before. Bruce gets to see just how powerful Danny really is.

It ends in death. It ends in victory.

There are casaulties, people Bruce cared about. But this time is family is alive, and bigger than before. Bruce grieves the loss of life, but for once he accepts that he did everything he could, that there's only so much he could do, that he saved so many lives, that he's just a man. And he accepts that he can be okay with that.

The heroes have lost.

Superman, Wonder Woman, and Shazam are dead. The only thing that’s kept Batman alive was his wit, but that’s not enough.

His wit didn’t save his children.

His wit didn’t save Alfred.

His wit didn’t stop the world from burning.

He’s become desperate for a miracle. He had never been desperate before, but all hope had been lost. He was one of the last teams of heroes that had survived the initial onslaught. He had no contingency plans, nothing he could invent. No weapon, no weakness.

His desperate plea was so strong it went through the fabric of the dimensions. Clockwork, who normally had no intention of looking into that dimension, decided to look at the timeline. He didn’t like what he saw, so he appeared before Bruce Wayne in the middle of the night. After a brief discussion, he decided to send Bruce back in time.

When Bruce opened his eyes next, he scrambled to find the date. He almost laughed in relief when he realized that this was the day he had become Batman. The day he had first donned the cowl. He was over twenty years in the past, and he still had the knowledge of what had brought the timeline to the brink of disaster last time.

Clockwork gave him a gift. A son named Danny, to be raised by Bruce. The boy was a newborn infant, with a head full of black hair and startling blue eyes. He didn’t know what Danny’s backstory was, or why Clockwork had possession of the infant, but he wasn’t going to ask questions. His world was safe, and he had another chance to prevent the end of the world twenty years early.

He would love his son as if he was his own flesh and blood. Then he would be the best Batman the world had ever seen.

[underburningstars]

Batsup where superman tries to ask Bruce wayne on a date but he has to get through Bruce's adopted kids first

Here you go anon! It's a bit short. But it felt good to end there. Hope you liked it!

on ao3

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Pairing : Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne

Tags : Batfamily, protective family, nervous Clark, just them being adorable and loving Bruce

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"What are your intentions with him?"

"Do you really like him?"

"Are you confident that you won't hurt him?"

"You know we come as a package deal with him right?"

"How serious about him are you?"

"Kids," Alfred calls them, "slowly. One question at a time." Clark is immensely thankful for that.

"So, do you really like him?" Tim asks first.

"Yes, I do." Clark can see that his lack of hesitation pleases the kids.

"Why ask us? If you like him take him on a date. Why did come to ask us?" Cassandra narrows her eyes at him.

Damian nods along, "Yeah, you should ask B, not us. So why did you come here, huh?"

"Because-because to Bruce you're the most important. If we do get together, I want you all to be happy with that too. I don't want any of you to have anything against me or our relationship. I want all you permission full and well for that." Clark explains the best he can but he can feel himself getting nervous under their intense gazes.

"You. Want permission." Jason deadpans in the flatest voice Clark had ever heard.

"From us?" Dicks voice is much more considerate, apparently taking pity on him.

"Yeah, I mean. Of course, I want your permission. You guys will always be Bruce's first priority and family and if we get together and-and you guys want to. Maybe...we could be too, y'know. Family." Clark has never stuttered this much in his life.

"You're approved." Damian says after a long pause.

"What?" Clark's eyes widen, "Really? Just like that?" Clark is having slightly hard time believing it was all that easy. He had been prepared for a myriad of tests and questions.

"Yeah, what did you expect? Did you think we'd ask you to bring him a moon or something?" Cassandra raises an eyebrow.

Honestly, Clark would've been less shocked if they asked for a moon. He knows better than saying that out loud.

"Yeah you're cool. Now stop wasting time here and go to B. Shoo Shoo." Alfred walked with him to Bruce's office.

"I really didn't expect it to be so easy." Clark tells him.

"The kids only want the best for Master Wayne. I am aware that they can often come off as rough and harsh but they mean well. They felt like you would take care of Master Wayne and that's all they need." They stopped in front Bruce's office and Alfren turned to him. "My feelings are quite the same. I know you will take care of him given the chance. Now let's hope you do get the chance." The older man smiled kindly at him and left.

Clark didn't want anything more than one chance. He also hoped that he would get that. But after talking to the kids and Alfred he was feeling more confident than he had in weeks.

He knocks on the door and goes inside hearing Bruce's 'come in'. Bruce looks up and gives him a small smile.

"Hey Bruce." Clark tied to smile but he's pretty sure it came out as a grimace.

"Hey? Clark are you okay?" Bruce's full attention was on him now. Any other day Clark would've preened under the attention but now it was just making him nervous.

"Yeah, I'm-I'm good. Listen I...needed to talk to you about something."

"I'm listening."

"I asked the kids about this and they're all okay with it. And Alfred too. He also wished me luck." Clark started to ramble, "So, what I mean to ask is. Would you go to the new art display with me?" There he said it.

Bruce blinked at him, "Are you-um-asking me out? On a date?"

"Yes?" Bruce raised an eyebrow at him when his reply came out as a question. "No. I mean yes!" Bruce let out a chuckle, so Clark thinks him making a fool of himself was worth it. "If you want to. It can be a date. There's no pressure really. I just-"

"Yes." Bruce cut him off.

"Yes?" Clark asked, hopeful.

"Yes? I'll go on a date with you." Bruce confirms, "Art show, yeah? Maybe we could get dinner too."

"Dinner sounds nice."

And it was.

[mischiefandspirits]

Bernard Figures It Out

Was reading through all the comments on @frostbittenbucky's post and all I could think of was that it was Bernard talking to Tim. Then I got to thinking...

"I've connected the two dots."

"You didn't connect shit."

"I've connected them."

Bernard figures out Tim's a superhero... sort of.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tim fidgetted nervously as he waited on the front porch of his boyfriend’s house. Bernard had sounded so serious when he’d called during Tim’s lunch to ask him to come over after work so they could talk about something.

Which Tim had done, after spending an entire board meeting just going over the past week trying to figure out what he’d done.

The only thing he could think of was that he’d ducked out halfway through their lunch date on Wednesday to give Duke some backup, but Bernard had seemed understanding when Tim explained there was an emergency at GRC Labs. It couldn’t have been a tipping point, either, since Tim had managed to only flake on three other dates over the past few months they’d been dating. Kate had been happy to cover for him as often as she could “out of queer solidarity” when she found out Tim was dating a boy for the first time and Tim had managed to trick Bruce into covering a few actual Wayne Enterprises emergencies for him when they came up.

There had to be a reason Bernard was breaking up with him, though. Had he missed something? He definitely wasn’t forgetting an important day. He was good with days and Tam was even better, so she would have reminded him on the off chance that he had forgotten.

What was he missing?

Bernard was smiling when he opened the door, but there was a nervous energy to it that had Tim’s stomach sinking. “Hey, Tim.”

“Hey.” Tim gave his own nervous smile then slipped inside.

They went into the living room and sat down on the couch.

Tim frowned when Bernard grabbed a manila folder off the coffee table. Crud, had he screwed up enough that Bernard had had to make a list? He knew he was new to dating a guy, but he hadn’t thought he’d done that bad. He’d really been trying, especially with how his and Stephanie’s relationship had fallen apart at the end. “What -”

“Just let me speak, Tim,” Bernard said, waiting for Tim’s nod. “Okay, so you know Clark Kent, right?”

Tim blinked as Bernard opened the folder to show a picture of Clark. It looked like one of the employee pictures from the Planet’s website, with his dorky “I’m just a humble country boy” smile and the golden globe from their roof photoshopped in as the background. “Uh, yeah? I think so. He works for the Daily Planet, right? I think he’s worked at a few of Bruce’s events. Not a lot of outside reporters are willing to come to Gotham.”

“Exactly!” Bernard said, snapping his fingers and pointing at Tim.

“What?”

He pulled out the picture to show the next page was an article titled, “DAILY PLANET REPORTER… BATMAN!?”

A wave of relief washed over Tim and he placed his face in his hands. “Were you up all night on the hero conspiracy boards again?”

“No. I mean, I found this on a board and was up all night thinking about it, but I found it reasonably early.”

“One in the morning isn’t reasonable, Bernard.”

“Says the guy who’s always wide awake when I call to infodump.”

“Touché.” Tim leaned against Bernard and gave him a smile. “So tell me, why is some reporter from Metropolis from all places Batman.”

“First of all, living in Metropolis is the perfect cover. Everyone assumes Batman would live in Gotham, no one would consider he could be from anywhere else. Metropolis is outside the GMA, but close enough that the commute is still possible.”

“But it’s Metropolis.”

“And who would think Gotham’s Dark Knight lives in the sunshine capital? Plus, I hear he disappears a lot on the job. There’s gotta be a reason for it!”

Tim made a note to let Clark know he needs to cut back on the disappearing act some since people are catching on.

“And have you seen the guy? He is swol AF, babe.”

“Please don’t call me babe while you’re talking about how hot another guy is.” Especially Tim’s honorary uncle.

“You know I prefer twinks.”

“BERNARD!”

“I’m just saying,” he continued, ignoring Tim’s shout. “The guy is definitely hiding something! Besides, Kent is an investigative reporter. He’s gotta know a lot about cases and the underground and detective work.”

Not as much as he likes people to think, but more than he likes people to know Superman does, Tim mused. “But what about the other vigilantes?”

“Well, Kent has a cousin…” Bernard flipped through a folder and pulled out a picture of Kara. It looked like a screenshot of her interviewing Lena for CatCo. “She’s obviously the latest Batgirl. Look at her hair. And the first Batgirl and the current Batwoman were obviously Lois Lane, the red hair is just a wig. Did you see how she kicked butt at that last event she went to? She’s not as subtle as Kent. That means their son is the latest Robin. He’s exactly the right size.”

Oh, Damian better not hear about this, Tim cackled internally. His youngest brother hated being reminded that Jon was the same height as him despite their two years age difference. Damian definitely took after Talia when it came to body type, no matter what he said.

“And Kent also has a brother.” This time he pulled out a picture of Kon. The clone must have been caught by a reporter out shopping with Ma since he was carrying some paper bags and glaring at whoever was behind the camera. “At least, he’s supposedly Kent’s brother, but he was a teenager when he first showed up with the Kents. A lot of people think he’s actually Kent’s son, that Kent got a girl pregnant when they were teenagers and something happened to the mom so Kent had to take him in. Now the Kents are trying to hide it by saying the two are brothers.”

That was… scarily accurate actually. Especially given Luthor and Clark were close friends at the time that Kon would have theoretically been born.

“And that beef would explain why the younger Kent brother went all crime lord on Gotham for a while before reconnecting with the family.”

“Wait, what?”

“Yeah, Kent Jr.’s got the perfect build for Red Hood.”

Tim bit back a comment on how Kon was shorter than Jason by a good foot. Timothy Drake-Wayne should not know that. Add Jason to the list of people who can’t hear this theory.

“And then there’s this girl,” Bernard picked up a picture of Lois, Jon, and Natasha Irons walking down the street together. “No one’s sure exactly who she is, but she’s been spotted with the Kents a few times. I think the cover story is that she’s Jon’s babysitter.”

“And the actual story?”

“She’s Black Bat, obviously. That’s why she wears a mask that fully covers her face. She doesn’t want to stand out as the only African American Bat.”

“Isn’t Signal also Black?”

“Yeah, but he works in the daytime so he’s already a standout.”

“And who is Signal in this? And what about Nightwing and Red Robin?”

“Well, Nightwing’s just a Blüd who came to Gotham. He doesn’t count.”

Ouch. Sorry, Dick.

“And Red Robin is obviously an older Robin, the one who was Robin when we were kids. Kent wanted to keep him on, and I don’t blame him. As for Signal, he’s got the same backstory as all the other Robins Kent picked up, he just went the Signal route because he didn’t fit the usual Robin mold.”

“Because the female Robin fit the mold,” Tim snorted. Robin Mold, as if he and his brothers were even the same ethnicity. Or even had the same hair color. Jason dyes his hair, Dick’s is brown-black, Tim’s is pure black, and Damian’s is more a dark brown and it’s only getting lighter as he gets older.

“She didn’t, that’s the point. Kent tried to give breaking the Robin mold a chance by letting his cousin have a go at it, but he realized it just didn’t work so she went back to being Spoiler and he got a new Robin.”

Not touching that with a ten-foot pole. “Right, and where does he get the usual Robins? Please tell me you’re not back on the secret government orphanages theory.”

“No, no, no. Kent travels sometimes for his job, right? And a lot of the time he’s going to places that have been hit by disasters or major crimes. So he’ll take in some of the displaced children to train as his robins.”

Tim pressed his face back into his hands.

“You see it, right?”

Honestly, Tim was just wondering how his boyfriend could be so close, and yet so far off. “How would Kent even afford taking care of a bunch of secret -- possibly illegally acquired -- children without anyone noticing?”

“Simple. Bruce Wayne is funding him.”

“Bernard, I love you, but what the heck?” Tim blushed and looked up as he realized what he’d said, but Bernard didn’t seem to notice as he steamrolled ahead.

“It’d also explain how he can afford all the gear and how he’d be able to travel to Gotham or anywhere else Batman goes without anyone noticing. He probably has a secret Batplane or something.”

“Why would Bruce do that?”

“Because Wayne cares about Gotham, everyone knows that, and this way he can make sure someone’s taking care of the city without anyone putting two and two together.”

“And two plus two is?”

Bernard gave him a hard look. “I’m not stupid, Tim. Bruce Wayne is obviously Superman. His face is right there.”

Oh, the others are going to love this! Too bad I can’t tell Damian or Jason. Jason especially would have loved this. “Right. Bruce is Superman.”

“He is. Superman is known for being nice and Bruce Wayne’s basically all that’s keeping the city running at this point. That’s nice as hell.”

Oh my god.

“And Wayne does charity for the victims of cataclysms, doesn't he? I bet he first saves people from them as Superman and then builds them new homes for free.”

Oh my god! Why am I not recording this!?

“And the Wayne’s were rich enough to hide the fact they adopted an alien baby.”

Tim raised an eyebrow. “If you’re about to tell me this is why Bruce’s parents got killed, you might want to stop while you’re ahead.”

“It’d make sense. There’re all sorts of unanswered questions about their deaths,” Bernard muttered under his breath, flipping through the folder. He pulled out another picture of Kara. This time she was in full Supergirl attire with a bus held overhead. “So if Wayne is Superman, then that’d mean your ex-girlfriend could be Supergirl. They look a lot alike and it’d explain how she got involved with you all.”

“Bernard, she has a human dad. You know, Cluemaster. The supervillain.”

“Yeah, her dad. But we don’t know anything about her mom!”

“Let me guess…”

Bernard pulled out a picture of Karen. She and Helena were suited up and talking to a group of cops, two goons held over each of Karen’s shoulders. “Her mom could be Power Girl! Some makeup and a wig and she could look just like Crystal Brown! And Damian Wayne is obviously the new Superboy! That’s why his background is such a mystery, right? He had to stay a secret until he could control his alien superpowers. That’s why he’s always so mean. It’s a cover since everyone knows Superboy is super sweet!”

Sure, when he’s not helping Damian pull pranks or using his adorable powers to put the blame on Kon and I. “No, Bernard. Damian and Steph are just very human hellspawn. And Bruce and Crystal are human too. I can’t believe you called me over here just to tell me you think Superman is both Batman’s sugar daddy and my adoptive dad.”

“Well, that’s not exactly why I called you over,” Bernard admitted, the nervous energy coming back. He grabbed Tim’s hands. “Tim -”

Tim’s stomach sank. “You are breaking up with me!”

“What? No! I don’t want to break up!”

“Why are you acting all nervous and serious then!?” Tim asked, pulling his hands away to throw them up in the air.

Bernard shook the folder. “Because I’m trying to tell you I figured out you’re Superboy!”

Tim’s brain blue-screened and his hands slowly dropped. “I’m sorry, what?”

“I know you’re Superboy. The older one, obviously. By the way, you and Damian really need to figure out separate names.”

Forget Jason and Damian, Kon can never find out about this. He’d never let me live it down. “Bernard, you called me a twink five minutes ago. Su-” Shoot, I can not risk getting Kon’s attention! “The older one might not be as big as Superman, but he’s not a twink.”

“Well, yeah, that’s the shapeshifting at work.”

“The what?”

“Obviously you Kryptonians can shapeshift. Why else would you look so much like humans?”

… Why do Kryptonians look so much like humans? Was there some - Wait, no! Break into the Fortress of Solitude for research later! Reassure your boyfriend that you’re not an alien now! “Bernard -”

“And that explains why your step-mom was so hot.”

“Gross.”

“She and your dad were actors hired by Luthor so you could have a normal life! But now Bruce has custody so he adopted you.”

“No.”

“That’s why you and your dad were so weird with each other when I met him.”

“We were weird because he’d just gotten out of a coma not long before to find that his wife was dead so he decided to actually be a dad for once in his life, but overcompensated and became a helicopter parent to a kid who was mostly on his own for his entire life!” Tim blurted out. “I am not an alien, Bernard!”

“Well, not technically since you were cloned from Superman on Earth.”

“Oh my god! You were just talking about Steph being Supergirl! Why would I date my dad’s cousin?”

Bernard blinked. “Supergirl and Superman are cousins?”

Right, Timothy Drake-Wayne wasn’t supposed to know that. “I thought they’d said something like that before, yeah. Are people seriously saying I’m Superboy on the internet?”

“NO! No, I swear I would have led with that if I thought your identity was compromised. A few people have mentioned Wayne and Damian, but not you or Steph or Jason.”

“Wh-Jason!? You think Jason was an alien too!”

“No, not exactly, but a few times when I’ve visited I swear I’ve seen a guy in the manor who looks like Jason. It’s just been out of the corner of my eye and he’s gone whenever I look so I’ve always thought it was just Dick or Bruce or some picture of Jason that my mind was playing tricks with, but it makes sense now that I know Wayne is Superman. He must have been able to heal Jason with alien tech, but couldn’t say anything because that would give away that he’s Superman.”

Damn it Jason! And damn it Bernard! I’m dating the smartest moron in the world! “Bruce did not bring Jason back with alien technology and none of us are aliens!”

“It’s okay, Tim. I won’t tell anyone.”

Tim grabbed Bernard by the jacket and pulled him into a kiss. When he started to feel lightheaded, he pulled back, “Could someone whose skin is as solid as stone kiss like that?”

Bernard blinked dazedly at him for a moment. “How do you know what Superboy’s skin feels like?”

Tim screamed internally. “He’s saved me from a kidnapping before.”

“Really?”

“Yes. I can get you the police report if you want.”

“Huh… And the others?”

“Not Supers. I can stab Damian the next time we’re at the manor if that’ll prove none of us are aliens.” He’d rather stab Jason, but that would probably only confirm to Bernard that Bruce used alien technology to bring him back.

“You probably shouldn’t stab your brother if he isn’t an alien.”

Tim rolled his eyes. “I won’t stab him anywhere deadly.”

“That’s not the point,” Bernard said slowly.

“He’ll be fine.”

“If you say so.”

“So do you believe I’m not an alien now?” Tim huffed, letting go of Bernard’s jacket.

The blond’s eyes dipped down to Tim’s lips. “If I say no, will you kiss me like that again?”

“You’re ridiculous,” Tim said, but he kissed him anyway.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Okay, but I still say Clark Kent is definitely Batman.”

“Sure, Bernard.”

[bluegarners]

uncle clark and his beloved nephew, dick grayson

“Hello? This is Clark Kent speaking.”

“Hey, Clark!”

“Dick!” Clark exclaims. “It’s good to hear from you! How’ve you been?”

“Pretty good, big man,” Dick says smoothly, his heart beat even enough for Clark to tell it isn’t a lie. A relief, actually. “How have you been? Saw you got hitched recently, eh?”

Clark blushes a bit. “Yeah, Lois and I got married about a month ago. We were sad you couldn’t come, we would’ve loved to have you there.”

“You know how it is,” Dick sighs. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t able to make it. I got caught up in some things and- yeah, sorry, Clark. I really wanted to be there.”

“Gosh, Dick,” the man of steel says hurriedly, “Please don’t feel guilty about that! I know how busy you are. Trust me, no hard feelings.”

“Scouts honor?” Dick teases.

“Scouts honor,” Clark assures.

They chuckle a bit, their shared golden boy, goody-two-shoes reputation making the best inside joke.

“I’m really happy for you,” Dick says, almost a tad too wistfully. “You deserve happiness, Uncle Clark. Lois is a good woman and could probably beat both our asses with a single article. You… You did good finding her.”

“Yeah,” Clark sighs, “I’m a lucky man. I don’t know how I ended up with such a wonderful life. My family gets bigger everyday it seems. Dick, can I ask something?”

“Anything.”

“If Lois and I ever decide to have kids, would it be alright if we named a boy after you?”

Stunned silence.

Clark can hear Dick’s heart rate increase dramatically, and for a moment, he thinks he’s made a mistake. Was that weird, to ask that? It’s just that, Dick was the first kid he ever met that made him believe in the future. Some scrawny kid with a heart of gold, and more, tagging alongside the ever stoic Batman; something about that image made him feel like there was more to life than the death he saw everyday. That the future he’s sure he won’t live long enough to see will be in good hands. That he won’t have to worry about laying to rest. That there might, one day, be peace.

“If that’s not okay,” Clark rushes, “We won't do it. It’s just, well I’ve known you since you were nine and you’ve become such an important part of my life, but if that makes you uncomfortable in any way, it-”

“No,” Dick says, voice cracking with emotion. “No, no, that’s… that’s fantastic, Clark. It would… That would be a huge honor, you’ve got no idea.”

He doesn’t comment on the suspicious sound of tears, nor the sniffling he hears.

“We were thinking of Richard Jonathan Kent. Has a nice ring to it, right?”

Dick laughs a little. “A bit of a mouth full, but sure. Maybe stick with RJ Kent?”

“Lois kind of liked Ric for short.”

“That’s a pass for me- makes it sound like the kid is some tough guy who chose a street name.”

“Don’t tell her this, but I kind of agree. I like RJ more.”

“I’ll keep my mouth shut. Scouts honor, obviously.”

A beat of amiable silence. Then, “You’re going to make a great uncle, Dick.”

Dick says nothing in response, but Clark can hear his heartbeat pick up again. He’s never been good with what a fast heart rate means, emotion wise at least, so he can only hope it means Dick is excited or perhaps even nervous about the prospect. God, he hopes it’s the former. Dick really would make a fantastic uncle; Clark can’t imagine anyone else who would suit the role better.

“Hey, listen,” Dick says, somewhat subdued. “I’ve got a favor to ask of you.”

“Anything,” Clark replies automatically.

“Could you keep a look out for Gotham for the next couple of weeks? I know you’ve got Metropolis and the Watchtower to keep you busy, but I’m going away soon and it’d make me feel better if someone could keep an eye out for Bruce while I’m gone.”

“Of course I’ll do that. I heard that the crime rate has been going up lately. Would you like me to do the same for Bludhaven?”

“Actually,” Dick hesitates, “Bludhaven is fine right now. I’ve been able to secure some of the major factions, so you don’t need to worry about us. Gotham has hit a rough patch, and I’m not going to be around to help out, you know? It’d just make me feel a lot better if you could keep an eye out if they need help.”

“I understand and of course I’ll watch out for Bruce. I know he doesn’t usually like me in Gotham, but I’ll keep my distance.”

“Thank you,” Dick sighs, as if a heavy weight had just been lifted off of his shoulders. “That makes me feel a lot better. Don’t get too busy while I’m gone, Uncle Clark. I can handle a nephew, but more than one and I might-”

“Yep, yep, got it,” Clark stammers, face going red. He hadn’t even thought past the one kid, but now that Dick mentions it, he’s always wanted a big family. Baby steps though. They just got married. “I’ll see you around, Dick.”

“Bye, Clark.”

Dick hangs up and Clark slowly puts down his phone. Lois stares at him from across the coffee table, putting down her newspaper and taking a deliberate bite of toast as she raises her eyebrows expectantly.

“So?” she asks through a mouthful of bread.

“We’re approved,” Clark smiles, face lighting up as his wife (oh god, his wife, what a wonderful word) beams up at him. “Richard it is.”

[batsfinest]

Goddddddd Batdad taking baby Damian in as soon as he's born is SO fucking cute it makes my TEETH rot. Talia knowing how cutthroat, merciless, ruthless and overall toxic environment the Al Ghuls live into and not wanting another her, another Bruce, another child being born with a sword in their hand.

She's disowned when her role in helping Bruce leave with Damian is revealed. Bruce becomes an enemy to them and she has no father anymore, but it feels welcomed. Freeing. Her shoulders finally feel light, knowing her reputation isn't tied to her father anymore.

Talia can be her own demon.

Damian is Bruce's first love, no you cannot change my mind.

Bruce is young. 24 years feeling like centuries old on a soul he felt was leaking away before holding his son's tiny hand between his thumb and index finger. The media is slamming him because sympathy for orphans washes away once they stop being children, but Bruce hasn't been one since he was 8 and watched his mother's hollow eyes sink in a body bag.

The media calls him immature. Reckless. Impulsive. All the synonyms in the thesaraous to describe what a horrible person he is for using a baby they speculate isn't even his to clean up the gritty, smudged image he made for himself. It doesn't make him want to hide Damian from the world, because he refuses to treat his baby like a shameful secret.

He's more proud of Damian than he ever was of the cowl.

Jason is his 2nd love, dirty, sharp tongued, and brave, looking him in the eyes when he tries to steal the tires off his car. His eyes are a stormy ocean reflecting a deep, lonely sadness, the kind you feel for a lifetime and more. Its like looking in a mirror.

Of course, not unexpectedly, he takes Jason home. "I can care for him. Why wouldn't I?"

Alfred is in the middle of preparing a blanket, fluffy and inviting, much like the ones Bruce was wrapped as a baby, when his throat raises with a high note of unconvinction. "I don't see a reason why anyone right in the mind would look at the lobsters boiled in a soda bath in our kitchen and say you weren't qualified to look after a child."

"That's strike 220, Alfred. "

"221, actually, sir."

Bruce's heatless retort dies quick once he sees Jason's thin limbs holding the small figure of a baby boy, covered in a light green blanket of his own, against his chest in a protective hold. He snaps a silent photo of the sweet scene, making it his phone background, and for the first time in years, his tears feel happy.

Its a cycle that repeats. He's proud of his boys, his kids, and wants to show it, then the world pushes. Bruce ignores it. Ignores the news station spitting on him for being the father of two without a ring on his finger, the scandal magazines speculating on a secret spouse he doesn't have, the journalists cornering him on every public appearance hunting for the hottest news to sell the freshest scoop.

He ignores it, until the push comes for his boys.

" That one, the new one, - Jason or something? I don't buy the whole nurturing father shtick. Wayne is a honcho in his prime, with more money than he has any right to have, on the cover of every magazine and news report imaginable, got women throwing themselves at him, left and right, and I'm just supposed to believe he'd trap himself with that responsibility, no question? Why?

Cause I'm supposed to be moved by the fact that he took in a crack whore's son after she slipped on the bucket? No. The courtain's gonna fall soon, and I'll be laughing when it does."

The TV is clicked off, the news anchor's smug face staring him in thr eye before darkness covers it, leaving Bruce to look at his own stormy reflection, crackling with cold fire, an expression Alfred mirrors in his tight silence. They both hear Jason's feet stomp up the stairs, but neither comment on it.

That particular news station falls in shambles in less than a few hours. It surprises everyone and no one.

When it comes to push and shove, Bruce was often the punch.

The public appearances get a bit easier after that. He can enjoy an ice cream with the boys in the park without annoying paparazzi following them, without reporters breathing down his shoulder for a private interview or a persistent business partner ringing him up.

He can just laugh when Damian covers his suit with creamy strawberry because the black is so dull for a baby's eye and when Jason draws mustaches and beards on his face with his own cone, and try not to sound too harsh when trying to tell Jason him and Damian are too heavy for him to push on the swings. But his son's more stubborn than a donkey, so he manages it, somehow, and Bruce gets a bright idea. To him.

Batman has a sidekick that he takes to McDonald's after crime is fought and people in Gotham has seen more scarring shit than That. Its just another Tuesday.

Now, because I'm superbat trash, of course I'm gonna make Clark eat shit with how fast he falls for Bruce. They're at the Wayne Gala, something extremely important for a new reporter on the block who has the chance of meeting the name that starts in Gotham and walks all the way to Metropolis.

The list of things he expected to cross out in the long scripture Clark thought of for Bruce Wayne shortens by the second when he watches the man and a little dark haired boy make silly faces at a camera, joy sparkling bright and evident in his smile as he cooes at whom the jounralist assumes to be his youngest.

A crisp voice hitching with a british accent emerges from the other line, sounding positively scandalized, as if to give voice to the stares Bruce is receiving. " Bruce Thomas Wayne, you are at high society event, control yourself - Do not force me to march there to fix that nest of hair I have no doubt that little menace was the culprit of , -"

" But it was sooo boring before! This whole thing is boring, Al, " the child,- Jason, he reminds himself. At the ridiculous amount of research he went through for this so he wouldn't look like a complete fool, he should at least know Bruce hates it when his children aren't referred to by name. "Can we come home now? I'm kind of tired of watching these numbnuts break their backs just to seen as good people for donating like a dime of what they actually make."

Bruce's hair is wild, sticking in every direction. Clark loves it with a vigor he can't put Into words.

"We talked about this before Jason, no talking about the uneven distribution of resource made by capitalists before you eat your vegetables, -- Aww, Dami! Look at daddy! Hi, baby," Bruce's smile, Bruce's voice, Bruce's face. Its all so warm it puts the sun to shame, and Clark is attracted like a moth to a flame.

He's got it, he realizes with a shiver.

He's got feelings.

[dented-nado]

Well since you specifically asked: Twiddler

“Yah I like Eddie but he’s straight // BAD LUCK, HUH?”

“No he’s not”

“NO IM NOT??”

Shenanigans

I’m dying right now, the ol’ Harv(ey) stubbornly thinks that Edward fucking Nygma is s  t r a  I g ht love it.  Still one of my fave convos we’ve ever had.

==================

Eddie’s POV

 =====================

It had been about a year since he had joined the sort of halfway home that Bruce Wayne had opened up for Ex-Rogues. However Eddie was somewhat convinced the billionaire he now realized had been Batman the whole time (pfft, he totally could have figured that out… he just… hadn’t…) rather liked having he, Harley, and Harv(ey) as a sort of odd band of roommates. And well… a literal mansion wasn’t a bad place to stay in by any stretch of the imagination.

He certainly had expected (and been quietly and not so quietly jealous) that because Harv(ey) and Bruce had apparently been close as far back as when they were children, Wayne would certainly be ecstatic to have Two-Face hanging around. He still was a little bit taken a back that well… anyone would want him around.

But he really was trying to reform. Maybe part of it was because the routine had gotten boring and he’d started finding more quiet and less destructive games and puzzles more entertaining these days. Besides, he realized he could have more fun with such things when he wasn’t being hauled back to Arkham because he’d taken things a little too far so often.

That being said, he had a new focus, a new goal.

And that was the previously mentioned Harv(ey) Dent. The giant, the absolute unit that towered over him.

Two souls for the price of one. Harvey was quietly intelligent (though sometimes a little bit delightfully oblivious), kind, and soft. Then Harv, he was bold, had a wonderfully fun fashion sense, and had a gravelly voice that admittedly caused Eddie’s mind to pull a blank at times.

They were a man that could have half their face burned to a crisp with acid and still be the only man that had been in Arkham (in Edward’s opinion) that could really get it.

He still remembered the first time “two-face” had been escorted into Arkham, the sight of them had knocked the wind right out of him, completely stopped his plotting for his next attempt to outsmart Batman.

Sure, perhaps he had heard and sort of seen images of Harvey Dent, the famous distract attorney that had been nicknamed Gotham’s “white knight” on the tiny, crappy TV they were occasionally allowed to watch when they were let out of their cells. But that never did him justice.

Seeing him here? Up close?

What a man. A handsome man, carved by angels and blessed by the devil

Now if only he could get Harv(ey) Dent to notice him.

Since that day he’d tried time and time again under the hope that maybe just maybe… this giant of a man would consider a relationship of sorts.

He tried to impress them with his vast intellect, sitting close to him and going off about any fact or subject he happened to know. He then tried to drill Harvey about his knowledge as a lawyer (which he thought also might just be interesting to know). They were certainly a good listener… and Harvey warmed up to talking about legal jargon and the pains of law school with Eddie eventually.

He was able to talk to Harv about their mutual love of fun patterns and bright colors and agreed that anyone who dissed it just didn’t understand fashion. He also realized soon that Harv loved to talk when he was acknowledged, and Eddie was more than happy to encourage him to and lightly swoon at that voice.

However, they were still only on a ‘good pals’ basis.

Which maybe Eddie could have accepted, except he caught Harvey staring at him at times, smiling slightly whenever Eddie would talk about what interested him. And Harv, he had gotten Harv to laugh a few times.

There was something there, he knew it, but for some reason he couldn’t puzzle out, Dent wasn’t acting on it.

It continued to this day. Harley had suggested to Edward he simply outright tell Harv(ey) Dent he was interested in them. But that wasn’t fun or interesting, and certainly not as romantic as Eddie would like.

So, after years of frustration now, he decided he’d go to the one person who had known Harv(ey) Dent their whole life for advice.

 ============

Bruce’s POV

============

“So, that’s my dilemma.”  Edward finished, pushing up his glasses in a very matter-of-fact way.

Bruce sighed. The only person who had ever rivaled his own stubbornness and… stupidity when it came to others having an romantic interest in them, was in fact Harv(ey) Dent. This would no doubt be difficult.

He wasn’t even sure how he managed to get into a relationship with Clark and Diana, so he wasn’t sure how much of a help he’d be trying to get Harv(ey) and Eddie to pair up.

“I’m decently sure he’s interested in you.” He replied.

“I’m quite sure too, however nothing I do seems to get them to do anything.” Eddie expressed, looking completely exasperated.

“hrrn....” Bruce grumbled thoughtfully. “What have you tried so far?”

“Well… I’ve given them gifts, flowers seemed like a sure-fire method- yet he seemed to somehow take them as a platonic gift.”

Bruce stared at Eddie for a long moment. “Who gives flowers platonically?”

Eddie shrugged.

Bruce sighed. “Dammit Harvey… Harv…” He mumbled under his breath. “I could try talking to them, get some better idea of what’s going on their head, could be Harvey and Harv keep arguing on how they want to respond.” He suggested.

Eddie nodded thoughtfully. “That may be the case, that is a possibility I had not considered… thank you for your assistance batma….. ah… Bruce…” He corrected with a slight grin.

Bruce half smiled back.

Batman was on the case.

====

“So… Harv…. Harvey…” Bruce began wandering over to where they were sitting.

They were seemingly switching between drinking a hot coffee and a Frappuccino.

Harvey had complained more than once that because of their disagreements Harv ended up making them consume way too much sugar. Too much caffeine in this case it seemed.

Their eyes flicked over to him.

“Hi Bruce.”

“What’s up Pretty Boy?”

Bruce sat down across from them. “Eddie seems to be interested in you.”

Never hurt to be blunt with a lawyer.

Harvey snorted. “That’d be nice… he is really cute but…”

“I’m sure Eddie is straight, just our luck, right?”

Bruce had never been so shocked in all his life.

Straight?

Eddie…

Straight?! E d  d I  e.

Str a I ght, Edward Nygma E Nygam s t ra ight

The two concepts being put together caused a complete error in Bruce’s mind that was slowly beginning to fry.

Who could possibly conclude that Edward was s t r aight?

The riddler…. The riddler who for a while greeted Batman like he was lowkey interested in a literal love-hate relationship

Edward

Str a I ght.

“Are you… fucking kidding me?” Bruce ended up stammering before he even realized it. “He’s not… at all!”

Harvey blinked at him a few times in surprise.

“What do you mean?”

Bruce gaped at them. They couldn’t be serious.

“Harvey… I… Harv… he… he’s not exactly subtle about it. In fact he’s very open, very much out and proud, flaming even. I’m sure he’d agree.”

Harvey looked at Bruce through squinted eyes. “Are you sure Bruce?”

“Sure, maybe he’s a bit more flashy than your average guy, but that doesn’t mean gay.” Harv added with a shrug.

“He calls you handsome at least 3 times a day.” Bruce said still staring at Harv(ey) like they were absolutely insane.

“Lots of people do.”

“Have you ever seen him even flirt with any women??” Bruce asked in disbelief.

“No but… well there’s always been more men in Arkham, and when do you even have time for that?”

Bruce was somewhere in-between wanting to laugh at them and slap them.

“He’s given you flowers.”

“Pretty sure he’s just being friendly.”

“Friendly…” Bruce wheezed.

This conversation was taking years off his life at this point. He shook his head and texted Edward.

“Get in here (the living room downstairs) It’s important”

Edward slid in and sat peppily down on the couch with Bruce within a few minutes, causing Harv(ey) to look between Eddie and Bruce in confusion.

“You rang Mr. Wayne~?” Eddie asked with a cheeky grin as he leaned his head against his hand.

“You know what these men just said to me?” Bruce began folding his hands together.

“Bruce nooo…” Harvey pleaded.

“No no, I think he should know.” Bruce insisted.

Eddie raised his eyebrows comically high. “Well don’t keep me waiting, what’s the tea?”

Bruce cleared his throat. “They said… they’re sure you’re straight.”

Eddie stared at Bruce for a minute, eyes widening.

“Me?” He asked completely baffled.

Bruce nodded.

Eddie threw back his head and laughed until his face turned red and he had trouble breathing.

Harv(ey) looked on stiffly, feeling as if they had made a mistake somewhere as the dawning realization slapped them in the face.

 ============

Harv(ey)’s POV

===================

It was bad enough they had put themselves in denial so far they had missed out starting something with the small bean-pole riddle-man much earlier…

But now because they had convinced themselves Eddie was straight and therefore could have no interest in them… Eddie and Bruce were refusing to let them live it down.

And Bruce seemed to have gotten literally everyone in on the joke. Anyone Bruce hadn’t told between his partners and his massive family, Eddie had told.

Harley had begun kissing Ivy in front of them while they both traded off saying “no homo tho” between kisses until Harv(ey) groaned and left the room in a huff, leaving them both laughing maniacally.

Eddie had begun dramatically entering a room with a flourish announcing “Ladies and Gentlemen, Guys, Gals, and Non-binary pals, the straightest man alive has arrived, you may all start the party.”

Even when they first slept together, Edward had started quietly laughing and mumbling about “how straight, and very much not gay at all this occurrence was.”

Bruce hadn’t been able to look at them in weeks without breaking out into a full on belly laugh at his expense, mumbling something along the lines of “The Riddler, st r a I ght, good lord...”

On one hand they were happy Bruce was laughing more but god dammit…

They felt a bit dumb about it to say the least.

“How did we ever think Eddie was straight?��� Harvey thought to himself.

“I don’t fucking know. I really… really… don’t.”                                                                                          

Well… maybe giving everyone a little levity while still being able to date a cute red-head that seemed to know the strangest facts about almost everything that they could enjoy listening to him babble about for hours happily…. Was all worth it. Even if they were embarrassed by their comically stupid brand of denile.

[here-be-hyper-fixations]

Drabble #6: Sanctuary Aftermath

JayRoy, cause I love that pairing (but also angst). Neither actually appear here (Roy’s dead and Jason hasn’t yet been informed), they are just talked about as the main subject.

“-meeting adjourned, we’ll resume tomorrow. Everyone go get some rest…”

The members of the Justice League shuffled out of the room, a heavy weight settled on each of their shoulders. Sanctuary had left the hero community in cinders. No one had escaped unscathed. Whether they were dead, hurt, or had lost someone, no one came away intact. So here they were, finishing up the debrief, and waiting to deal with the clean up tomorrow. Some left the with reddened eyes, others furiously wiped their cheeks, trying to erase the tear tracks. They’d lost too many at sanctuary. People were meant to be safe there, to heal…and yet…

Only four people remained, the big three, and Oliver Queen. They were all still sitting at their seats, the silence threatening to drown them. The archer hadn’t spoken at all during the meeting. It was completely understandable…despite everything, he knew Oliver loved Roy as a son. Bruce knew what it was like to lose a child…first Jason, then later Damian. He found himself thanking whatever force there was that he had gotten them back. That wouldn’t be the case with Roy. According to Dinah, his body had been cremated as per his will’s instructions.

“Bats…” Oliver’s head was in his hands. His voice was rough, unnervingly quiet, but somehow steady.

“Oliver, I…,” he sighed, letting out a long breath, “What do you need?” The archer ignored his question. He kept his eyes locked on the table in front of him.

“Have you told Jason yet?”

“No. I haven’t gotten around to locating Red Hood.” Bruce winced as he spoke. That should have been one of his top priorities, but Jason was difficult to locate, impossible if he didn’t want to be found. But that shouldn’t have mattered…he should have just bit the bullet and contacted Talia as soon as they’d identified the body. He knew his son was close to Roy Harper, he deserved to know his best friend had died. Oliver raised his head, covering his mouth as he glared, vibrant green piercing daggers into Bruce.

“Might wanna do that,” Green Arrow hissed, “sooner rather than later.”

“They were good friends, were they not?” Diana’s lips were pulled into a frown, exhaustion evident in the bags under her eyes and pallor of her skin.

Oliver snorted, a bitter chuckle escaping his clenched teeth.

“Best friends – or so I thought,” he reached into his pocket, pulling out a small black box and sliding it towards Bruce, “but best friends don’t buy each other engagement rings, do they?”

Bruce gingerly picked up the box, hesitating a moment before opening the lid. He nearly dropped it when he saw the polished platinum ring nested in black velvet. It was deceptively simple at first glance but looking at it more closely Bruce could see intricate details carved into the shining metal. The combined symbols of Red Hood’s bat and Arsenal’s arrow took center stage in the design.

“Fuck…”

“I’m guessing you didn’t know either?”

Bruce couldn’t bring himself to tear his eyes away from the glinting ring. No, he hadn’t known, hadn’t even thought that…he knew they were close, but dating, considering getting married? No…no, how could he have missed something so important?

“You’re sure? They were together?” Clark’s eyes were wide, flicking between the box and Oliver. Diana placed a hand on Bruce’s shoulder, a solid weight grounding him to the present. He had to tell Jason…

“Dinah and I, we went through Roy’s things, his will, his photos, his phone…looks like they’ve been a thing for a while. They were serious about each other.”

Oliver brought out an older smartphone, tapping on it a few times before sliding it across the table. It was open on Roy’s wallpaper – a picture of him and Jason holding Lian. The red head was kissing Jason’s cheek while he and Lian stared up into the camera. They were smiling. Bruce couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen Jason smiling like that…unworried and genuinely happy, eyes shining and a soft brush dusting his cheeks. The Bat choked as he tried to keep his composure. He’d already been dreading telling his son before, but now?

“I need to call Talia. She should know how to find Red Hood. Do you-” Bruce closed the box, holding it and the phone out towards Oliver. The archer waved his hand and slowly shook his head.

“Hood should have those. It’s what Roy would’ve wanted…” Oliver’s lips pulled into a sad, bitter smile.

“Tell me when you find the kid. We need him to go over Roy’s will.”

The Bat nodded, then tucked the box and the phone away in his belt. He ignored Clark and Diana’s calls and walked out of the room. He had to find his son.

Bruce had broken the news of a loved one’s death to many people, hell, he was the one who told Dick and Alfred about Jason. But telling his son, his baby that his partner, his best friend, his lover was dead…for the first time in a long time, the Dark Knight found himself truly lost.

As if on cue, his communicator pinged. He pressed a finger to the bud in his ear.

“Talia…”

“Beloved.”

Bruce sucked in a breath. This was for his son and no matter his own personal problems with Talia, his boy came first right now.

“I need to find Jason.”

[ellana-ravenwood]

The day he lost Titus - Damian Wayne x Batmom

I was thinking about how Damian LOVES his animals so much, and how heartbreaking it would be if he lost one. And since I like writing him actually acting like the kid he is...I wrote a quick drabble about it. Hope you’ll like it :

My masterlist blog : @ella-ravenwood-archives

_________________________________________________

                                                       ******

It happened at the Kent’s farm.

You were invited there by Clark’s mother, who had been asking for YEARS that your family come see the farm one day. And spend a relaxing time there. Not worrying about city problems, and being surrounded by nature (”and cows, and their smell, and hay fever...” you’re pretty sure Bruce would add, a sort of disdain in his voice. He was NOT a country boy).

Martha Kent and her son were very close from each others, and more than once Clark confided in her about the struggles of being “Superman”. And how much, surprisingly, the Batman and his family actually helped out.  

Against what most people would think, given their history, Bruce was the first person to understand how lonely it was to be Superman. To be that over-powerful being, that never quite found his place in the world (at least when they first met).

He was the first one to get how alone Clark could feel, and how much he felt like an outcast. Then again, it was mainly because Bruce could truly understand what it was like.

Him too, for different reasons though, felt disconnected from “normal” people most of the time. He truly understood Clark...and through the years, in his own way, helped him out to find his place in the World.

And sure, at first, they clashed a lot. Clark had some prejudices about Bruce, and vice versa. But over the years, they truly became friends and helped each others more than they’d ever imagined.

They saved each others countless times. Every time it happened, they understood one another, and their motives, more and more. And so they slowly but surely became best friends.

When you entered Bruce’s life, Clark saw a clear shift in his behavior. 

A very welcomed one as well. It was as if a light came back in the Bat’s heart. A little flame fueled by love. And that fire was fanned by the kids entering both your lives, one by one.

You too, became close friend with Clark. Your children were friend with theirs. And Lois ? Ah you and her really got along well. You both knew which button to push to annoy your husbands, and also thought it was hilarious, to see two grown ass men getting vexed so fast.

Especially knowing it was the mighty Superman, and the fearless Batman.

In any way, long story short, Martha wanted to invite Bruce, you, and your family over because she knew how much you all counted for her son. For her grandsons. And for her beloved daughter-in-law. 

Only you all had quite busy lives, and when you could go, then Clark and/or Lois weren’t available, and vice versa.

Plus, let’s be honest, your husband wasn’t particularly thrilled about going to “Smallville”. He really was the epitome of a “city boy”. It took a little push on your part to finally convince Bruce that it was a good idea.

Though you didn’t have to spend a long time trying to convince him, in the end. Because he just had to see how excited Damian was about going (some story involving Jon talking about a cool forrest to built a tree house in or something like that) and he was sold.

It was so rare to see his son that excited about things as trivial as building a tree house...

Damian, because of how he was raised, often dismissed the childish side of him that stayed dormant for so long. So to see him embrace it like that ? Of course Bruce would finally make the time to go.

************

And here you were, on a warm Sunday afternoon, at the Kent’s farm.

You could see, as Alfred drove the car up the dusty road leading to the house, that Bruce already regretted this decision. He was looking like a goddamn brat who didn’t want to do something, and was being forced into it. 

You were 100% sure he would have rather spend the day at Wayne Manor, watching movies with his kids and you. Just him and his family. 

But hey, in your heart, the Kents were kind of family too. 

As Alfred pulled over right in front of the barn, the Kents greeted you immediately, getting out of the house. 

You barely saw your youngest son barge out of the car, and run to his friend. Jon waved at you all quickly from afar, Damian said “hello” to Clark, Lois and Martha...And off they were, followed by a very excited Titus. 

Ah, of course you took the dogs with you. It was the perfect opportunity for them to see more than Wayne Manor’s ground (though it was big enough for them to have plenty of exercise). 

Damian, Jon and Titus quickly disappeared in the fields, saying “yes yes” to Martha telling them lunch would be serve in an hour. 

“You can go too, Ace, you know ?” 

You tell Bruce’s dog, as he clearly was tempted to follow his little brother in the fields. But the dog was looking at his unhappy master, and you just knew he wouldn’t go just because he was worried about him. 

What a good boy. 

Bruce, however, wasn’t being a good boy at all...

He looked very grumpy. 

You bumped him with your shoulder, and he looked at you, his frown not disappearing though his eyes softened a bit. You rolled your eyes, and before he could say anything, you gave him some antihistaminic you took with you because you knew of his severe hay fever (another reason he disliked the country and didn’t want to come in the first place). 

He looked happy you thought about it, and even happier about the fact you seemed to have read his mind as you gave it to him before he even said something....but he still wasn’t in the best mood, and obviously did not want to be here. 

And oh Clark, Lois and Martha were walking towards you now, and you DID NOT want them to think you forced Bruce to come. Because you didn’t, he said “yes” of his own volition (well, maybe with a little convincing...), and you were certain he would have a good time. 

He was just being a grumpy boy right now, for the sake of it, really. He had a reputation to keep...Ah but a genuine smile from you, and a mischievous wink, and everything was fine for the Bat. Before he noticed, he was smiling back at you, and it was too late to go back now. 

Damn it, you tricked him again, with your cute smile and your winks to die for. 

His mood was instantly lifted, and the negative thoughts that were invading his mind until now, suddenly gave place to thoughts about how nice it was, to spend a day far from Gotham, with his children, his wife, his dogs, Alfred, and his best friends...And all of that, because you smiled at him. 

You’d certainly call him “cheesy”, and it was true. He really was right now. 

But you loved the fact you could (almost) always cheer him up with a smile and a wink. Of course, when he was in one of his genuine dark days, it took a lot more work...but right now ? His biggest problem was his hay fever (and he had the antihistaminic you gave him), and the fact he wasn’t a fan of the country side. Plus the fact he wanted to spend his only day off of the week with his family, and his family only...

But as Clark and Lois came forward, smiling brightly at them, something in Bruce’s heart softly said : “You are with your family”. 

He turned around, and although Damian and Titus left already, he was surrounded by all the people he loved. 

You. Dick. Jason. Cass. Tim. Alfred. Conner (with whom he grew close because he was Timothy’s best friend, but also because at the beginning, he was there when Clark wasn’t, and he was the one that convinced Clark to take care of him). Lois. Martha Kent (who reminded him a lot of his own mother...sometimes a bit too much. That nursing side of hers could make him feel very melancholic and missing his own mothers, at times). And the king of idiots, Clark Kent. 

Oh ! And Ace ! His lovely dog. He petted the dog between the ears, saying a low “such a good boy”, and Ace became the happiest dog on Earth. 

Yes. He was with his family. Why the Hell was he feeling so grumpy a few minutes before ? Oh well, it was in his nature to be like that, sometimes. 

Your smile, once again, saved him from all the negative thinking he was doing. He lost count long ago of the many times you saved him from falling in a dark pit of despair and sadness, with that wonderful smile of yours...

And so, when Clark came to shake his hand, Bruce Wayne was actually genuinely in a good mood, and only teased his friend lightly, taking a jab at his flannel (because hey, he couldn’t say NOTHING right ? The man would then think he was important to him or something...haha). 

Yes. As Bruce saw his kids happily following Conner inside the house, you talking with Martha, and Lois and Clark smiling at him and answering his teasing...He felt strangely appeased. 

Today was going to be a good day. 

************

Bruce was certain that today was going to be a good day. And oh it started so well. 

Tim, Cass and Conner immediately disappeared in the boy’s room to play some “Cheese Viking”, as Superboy just got the latest version and couldn’t wait to “kick their ass” (and god was he going to have a surprise, when he’ll discover that Cass was the best cheese viking player he ever met). 

Dick and Jason went to help Martha finish the remaining of the cooking. 

Both your oldest sons always liked to help Alfred cook, when they were younger. And it kind of stuck with them even now. Then again, it used to be just them and Alfred, back then. No other little siblings to pester them to play or train with them ! So of course, they’d take a liking to cooking more than their brothers and sister. 

Alfred wanted to go help too, but was shooed away by Clark’s mother who said he was too used to serve others, and needed to be pampered too sometimes. 

Clark, Lois, Bruce and you, after making sure Martha didn’t need help (after all, she shoed away Alfred and had two strong boys to help her out, she was definitely fine), were talking, gathered around the dining room’s table. 

And Bruce felt so at ease, here, surrounded by his friends and love. It was also very comforting, that his children were currently acting like “normal” people, playing outside, playing video games, or just cooking. 

It was also oddly comforting, to see Alfred snoozing away slowly, sitting on the couch (poor man hardly ever had a break). 

And Bruce was just so sure this would be a great day ! 

That’s when Damian came in, tears in his eyes, followed by a Jon whose face said it all.

Something bad had just happened. 

You didn’t know what yet, but to turn your son in that state, and for Jon to make that saddened face.

Did they fight ? No. No if they did they would be destroying the barn right now, and make so much noise that you’d go break them up.

Did they got hurt ? You never saw Damian cry because he hurt himself...in fact, the only few times you saw him cry, was when you all thought Dick was dead, when you told him he could call you “mom” and when his father forgot his birthday...

“What is it sweetie ?”

You ask him, utterly worried. 

Damian doesn’t think, and goes straight to your arms. Which shocks everyone in attendance (well, everyone but Bruce, Alfred and your children. They saw the boy clinging to you more than once when he was distressed...but they understood why it must be a shock to Clark, Lois and Jon, who only ever saw his son acting tough and confident, if not arrogant).

Sitting around the kitchen table, you catch your son and wrap your arms around him. He lays his head on your shoulder and sobs, and you know it must be really bad when your hand running up and down his back in a soothing motion doesn’t calm him, when your other free hand scratching his scalp doesn’t stop his tears...

Because those two movements combined ? It usually calmed the Wayne boys down in a matter of seconds. 

Finally, he speaks. And you understand.

“Titus is gone..”

************

It’s you, who gave him Titus.

The idea came to you one morning, as you saw Bruce and his own dog, Ace, walk in the manor’s gardens. You remembered when your husband got Ace, and how quick it clicked between them. 

And bam. It hit you all of a sudden.

You caught your Broosh hugging and talking to his dog often. 

Most of the time, Bruce would tell you what he feels, but sometimes, when you fought for example, he would vent to his dear dog. Let out his frustration. Or just talk about things he thought were too sappy, that he often ended up telling you anyway, but you know what ? At least, the dog couldn’t repeat to anyone that he called you his “sun”.

And the way Bruce was interacting with Ace is what gave you the idea.

You were going to buy a dog for Damian.

Taking care of a living thing would be great training (this was BEFORE he had his own little zoo in the cave, with cats and cows and bats and freaking dragons) for him, work on his compassion.

Besides, it was nice to have someone to whom you could vent everything to. Ideally, you wanted him to come to you whenever he had a problem, but you knew it was impossible. So...A  dog it would be.

And just like with Bruce and Ace, Damian and Titus instantly clicked. 

They both had this “high” air about them (probably coming from the fact Titus was a great dane), but under this almost arrogant looking persona, they both were extremely sensitive, and craved love and affection.

Getting him Titus did everything you hoped for, and even more. You knew for a fact that whenever your son felt down, and didn’t want to talk about it to anyone...He’d confide in his dog, and would hug him all night long. 

Titus was an easy dog. He listened well, and was calm. He was always there for his “master”, and oh him and Damian were so adorable ! 

Taking care of a living being genuinely helped Damian understand a lot of things he had difficulty to fathom, at first. In the end, Bruce was convinced that you getting him Titus was kind of vital in his development, in him becoming empathic and “human” again. 

Well, of course, your husband still thought YOU were the main reason Damian evolved that much, as you truly showed him love, compassion and forgiveness...but Titus most definitely helped. 

You were glad, you got him a dog. Glad your son had at least one best friend, no matter what. 

Today though, you wished you hadn’t done it, as he was clinging to you, crying, devastated, because Titus got lost...

************

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry ! It’s all my fault !”

“No, it isn’t...”

“But Damian, I’m the one that-”

“It’s not your fault !”

It took Damian quite a long time, before he could stop crying and choke on his tears. He only managed to tell you that “Titus was gone”, without more details, before he cried even more.

And none of you dared to disrupt him.

He looked so crushed, you had to let him have this break down moment. 

And so you just held him against your heart, trying to soothe him. 

You were quickly joined by your other sons and daughter, who were alarmed by the sound of their little brother crying. 

Them too, weren’t used to see him genuinely cry. And their comforting hands joined yours as they surrounded Damian, trying to convey their understanding and love to him. 

Your husband and Alfred stayed a bit away, not wanting to overwhelm the boy, but also trying to figure out what happened exactly ? What did he mean, Titus was “gone” ? 

When Damian finally sort of calmed down, he explained : 

“We were -choked sob- we were playing catch with Titus, and saying how fast he was bringing back the ball. So then I told Jon to throw it as far as he could ! And so he did, and Titus went running right after ! But then he didn’t came back for a long time, and -another chocked sob- when Jon flew up and used his supervision, he couldn’t see him ! So we went into the forrest, trying to find him, but he was nowhere ! And even with his supervision Jon couldn’t find him !” 

Damian fell back in your arms, and you stroked his back once more. 

“I’m sorry Damian...” 

“It’s not your fault. He always came back...If-if he was alright, he would be back by now !” 

It was cute, how Damian was clearly not angry at Jon for throwing the ball too far. It wasn’t really the boy’s fault anyway...But your boy tended to be a bit irrational, when he was angry and/or sad. The fact he didn’t get mad at his friend clearly showed how far along the road he went.

Which broke your heart even more, to see him so devastated about the fact Titus MIGHT be gone forever. 

Oh but it wasn’t your family’s style to abandon ! 

And amongst the chaos of Damian sobbing, and this fact destabilizing all of you...Ace came to the rescue. 

He came to you, and nudge you in the leg, barking. He then went on the house’s porch, and barked some more, before coming back to you, and running to the porch again. 

Bruce understood instantly what his beloved dog meant. 

“I think he picked Titus’ scent !” 

************

This was awful. 

A great day turned into a disaster. 

Ace did pick Titus’ scent up, but lost his trail at a stream. Your husband’s dog wasn’t getting any younger, and his sense of smell wasn't as great as it used to be. The stream was enough for him to lose his little brother’s track...

That’s when Clark came into action. You were all sure now, that Titus crossed that stream. Now the dog was fast, but not fast enough to escape Superman’s great heightened senses ! 

Except...Except Clark couldn’t see or hear Titus anywhere. 

And that’s when Bruce knew they wouldn’t find Titus again...If even Clark “I can smell brownies being made in Kansas while I’m in space” Kent couldn’t find him, then it meant that Titus was probably...probably...

It was rare, for Damian to jump in his father’s embrace willingly like that. They weren’t particularly big huggers, and did it only in specific situations. 

They hugged you a lot. But dad and son ? They were a bit awkward with each others at time. Except in certain situations. 

Like right now. 

Damian losing one of his best friend, his beloved dog, Titus...And so Bruce picked his little boy up (because right now, no matter what he went through, Damian truly was, just a little boy), and hugged him tight against his chest. 

************

It had been three days since Titus disappeared, and Damian was still unconsolable. 

For the first time since he entered your lives, he didn’t want to go out on patrol. For three nights in a row...He didn’t even felt like venting his frustration and sadness by kicking bad guys’ asses ! 

The loss of his dog really hit him hard. 

You knew he loved him, but you never realized to what extent. It felt as if he just lost a member of his family...And in a way, he really did. 

Titus was here when neither you, nor his father or siblings were around. 

Titus was here on long nights when Damian was too worried about bothering you, or anyone, and needed comfort. 

Titus was here when Damian was angry with you, and needed to vent. 

Titus was here on cold nights, to warm him up, or on hot days, to give him some shades simply by standing next to him. 

Titus was here to help him out on some of his cases ! The few ones Bruce accepted he’d research alone ! 

Titus was always here. 

And now, now he was gone. Probably forever. Because even if Superman himself couldn’t see any sign of him, it probably meant...meant...

Titus must have had an accident. Fell somewhere. Fell to his dea-

Damian couldn’t even think about it, but at the same time, he had to be realistic. They searched that forrest for ages. AGES ! Superman and two Superboys were with them ! Clark, Jon and Conner didn’t find ANYTHING ! 

Which meant...

For the hundredth time in three days, Damian started to cry just thinking about it. And right now, none of his family members were available, as it was the middle of the day (you and Bruce allowed him to not go to school until he would feel better). 

Usually, when Damian felt blue and no one was around...Well, at least Titus would be ! 

The door to Damian’s room, that wasn’t quite closed, slowly opened, and the boy’s heart leapt in his chest ! This slow creaking sound, it was the exact same one Titus would make whenever he’d push the door open with his nose !

Full of hope, your son turned around to find...Ace. 

It was Ace. 

The loss of his “little brother” hit the dog hard too, even more so since he wasn’t able to track him. Ace had been particularly demanding lately, asking you and Bruce to pet him whenever you were home. He’d come sleep on your bed too, which he never did before. 

And he also spend much more time with Damian than he used to, both feeling the clear absence of Titus...

************

Dick had always been confident in his ability to cheer his siblings up. He knew what they all liked, and what relaxed them ! 

He’d often surprise them with their favorite things, whenever he felt like they needed a “pick-me-up”. Ever since Jason was officially adopted, Dick took his role of older brother VERY seriously. 

And though this time it took him a few days to get into action (the time to gather everything he needed), he was SURE that he would be able to lift Damian’s mood, if only a little bit...

But oh. Oh was he wrong. 

Damian did not react to the offer of playing “Cheese Viking”. He didn’t say anything when he gave him his favorite sweets. He barely acknowledge all the trouble Dick went through to bring everything he loves...

Usually, even Damian would be utterly grateful to Dick for all his efforts. No one could stay stone faced in front of such dedication ! Dick either went all in or didn’t do anything at all ! 

He truly was, the champion to cheer his little siblings up ! And even if they still felt bummed after a day with him, they’d at least be extremely thankful to him existing...Because yes, no one could have no reaction to their brother going through a lot just to help them out ! 

And yet, yet Damian didn't react to anything. And after a few failed attempt from Dick, the boy even told him that he just wanted to “be alone”, and went back to his room, sitting at his window, like he had been those past  few days. 

Damian sat there, not eating or drinking much, staring at the Manor’s front gate, hoping Titus would come back...

And all of Dick’s attempt fell flat. 

It seemed like nothing, NOTHING, could ever cheer the boy up again...

************

“It’s really not your fault, Jon.”

“Then, why doesn’t he want to see me anymore ?”

Tim was at the Kent’s farm, there to give them news about the Titus/Damian situation, and to go back to the forrest in the hope to find the dog again...

Tim was known to never give up, no matter the odds. 

He was the only one SURE that your husband wasn’t dead, all those years ago, when he disappeared for so long after a Justice League mission. And even as you abandoned ever seeing him again, Tim didn’t. 

Therefor, for the past week, your son went back to the Kent’s farm over and over again, and joined Jon and Conner in the search for Titus. By that point, Tim just wanted to find the dog back, no matter which state he would be in...

At least, if they found Titus passed away, Damian could slowly start to heal and properly mourn, right ? 

Of course, your boy was still hoping to find Titus alive ! 

They were looking for the hundredth time around the forest, when Tim noticed how down Jon seemed to be. 

“He doesn’t really want to see anyone. Not even our mom. Usually, he’d cling to her 24/7, if he was truly feeling sad ! But right now, he just wants to be left alone in his bedroom. So really, I don’t think he’s mad at you. I just think the grieving process is taking a lot of time for him right now...” 

“But it’s kind of my fault, I threw the ball too far. I can’t control my strength yet, it was stupid to use it all...” 

“Jon, Damian asked you to do it. None of you could know something bad would happen, ok ? And hey, maybe Titus is fine, and just got lost somewhere. And we have to find him, ok ?” 

Jon didn’t seem convinced, but that probably was because Tim wasn’t really either. But hey, for his brother ? Timothy Drake-Wayne would spend the rest of his life coming to this forest, day after day, in the hope to find Titus somehow. 

************

Jason knew how it felt, to loose a dog. 

He lost his a few years back. When he died, his beloved dog “Curtis” (he couldn’t even remember why he called his dog that name) let himself die of sadness. 

No matter how much you and Bruce tried to cheer him up, how much Ace tried too...Curtis just wasn’t the same, after Jason’s death. And just a year after your son was gone, his dog died too. You were sure he died of sadness, as the veterinarian didn’t find anything wrong with him...

Only Jason wasn’t dead. And when he came back, finally deciding to come home after quite a while of hatred and feelings of vengeance...he discovered his dog was gone. 

He was devastated. Felt like the World hated him. Why ? Why did Destiny let him die so young, killed by a maniac ? And got resurrected by another maniac ?  And why, WHY DID THEY HAVE TO TAKE HIS DOG ?! 

Yes. Jason knew exactly how it felt to loose your “best friend”, and so, he’s the only one that didn't try to cheer his little brother up. 

Instead, he would come in his room to give him a nice warm, comforting cup of tea. Or lay a blanket on his shoulders when it was a bit cold. 

He would come and sit silently with him, staring at the front gate too, putting all his energy into the wild hope that maybe Titus would come back. 

Jason would just...be there. A warm presence, that sometimes Damian would cuddle up too without even noticing. 

As odd as it sounded, Jason kind of tried to sort of take Titus’ place, and became that comforting warmth against which Damian snuggled when he felt particularly sad. 

The boy would never utter a word, and sometimes, Jason wondered if he even registered that he was clinging to him with all his might. 

Jason became the only one able to stay around Damian, without him telling him to go away. Why ? Simple. 

Because your Jason knew the pain of loosing his dog. 

And knew what he wished he could have when he lost him...at the time, fortunately you and Bruce were here for him, but it wasn’t quite what he needed. 

Sure, your hugs were as healing as ever. But he didn’t want to hear how sorry everyone was. He just wanted something to cling to in silence, and to be left alone with his grief. 

Which is what he gave Damian. By sitting silently beside him, and being that warm comforting presence the boy could hold on to. 

************

Alfred had no idea how to fix this. 

He was able to bring back some joy to Bruce when he lost his parents, by taking care of him as if it was his own son. 

But Damian ? Damian kept sending everyone (but Jason) away. 

He didn’t want to talk. Didn’t want to do anything. 

And this was destabilizing for Alfred, because talking and being there to listen to his master, is how he was able to give his master Bruce some semblance of happiness ! 

Your beloved butler was slowly starting to panic, not knowing how to fix this situation. Because so far, he always found a way to reach the ones he came to call “family”. 

You. Bruce. Tim. Jason. Dick. Damian. Cassandra. 

He was always able to reach you all. Except right now. 

And this was extremely distressing, for the old man he was...

************

Cass felt just as powerless as Alfred, but for another reason. 

Her and Damian always understood each other, since they had quite a similar childhood. A parent trying to turn them into weapons. A clear lack of love, and empathy. 

Yes. Her and Damian got along instantly, understanding each others’ trauma and being there to catch the other one up when they fell. 

But right now, she had nothing to relate to, nothing to compare Damian’s pain to. Because, fortunately, she never felt the pain of loosing someone she loved. 

All the people that counted the most in her life were alive and well, so how could she understand what her little brother was going through ? 

She just didn’t know how to react. And Damian wasn’t making it easy to understand...He kept sending her away whenever she tried to talk. Whenever she tried the technique that always worked before. 

Like mimicking their mother and stroking his back. Or smiling at him. 

Nothing that usually worked, would work now. 

And Cassandra felt lost. And powerless. 

She kept herself up almost every nights, researching the internet for ways to cheer her brothers up...But everything she tried would fail. Over and over again. It was so disheartening, and she wanted to help him so bad ! 

But it seemed like she couldn’t...

************

You and Bruce shortly thought about getting him another dog, but then realized it would be very insensitive. Titus wasn’t gone since a long time, though there was almost no chance he would ever come back. 

And getting Damian another dog would send the wrong message. There was still a little sliver of hope. Thin, yes, but still. Buying him a new pet would shatter everything, end break him entirely. 

You couldn’t do that. 

Not yet. 

Maybe later, when he’ll finally get over his heartbreak ? 

Oh but no new dog could ever compare to his beloved Titus ! 

Both you and Bruce took the entire affair hard too. 

Firstly because it was utterly heartbreaking, to see your son in so much pain, and secondly because it seems like nothing you could do could ever cheer him up again ! 

Before that fateful day where he lost Titus, you, or Bruce, or anyone from the family always had a solution at some point to cheer the boy up ! 

But it seemed like this time, he truly was unconsolable. Truly, genuinely heartbroken. 

Then again, he never felt such a pain before, as whenever he “lost” someone, they turned up later on all well and alive. But this time...this time there was almost no chance Titus would ever show up again. 

And he truly was Damian’s first, and best friend. 

He was the one that was always there, and that had been there since almost day one as soon as he began his new life at the Manor ! 

Losing him was devastating. That you and Bruce understood. It’s just that...Usually, you’d hold your children tight and things would pass. 

But this time, it didn’t work. This time, he didn’t want to let you do that. 

And both you and your husband were really starting to take this all situation hard. Seeing your son suffering like that was awful. 

But, what could you do ? You, and all your family members had been wracking your brains for days, without finding a solution. 

Except maybe finding Titus, but that seemed more and more impossible. 

************

Two weeks went by, without much improvement from Damian. 

He started to go back to school, and on patrol...but without much enthusiasm. He talked a bit to you, to Bruce, to Alfred or to his siblings. But it was always very short, monosyllabic, and then he’d go again isolate himself in his room. 

You’d all try over and over to cheer him up, but it seemed he truly became the definition of the word “unconsolable”. And so it’s with a certain gloom, that life continued at Wayne Manor...Without Titus, or Damian’s carefree laugh when he was happy. 

Or trademarked “tt”. Or cockiness. Or sweetness. Or arrogance. Or...

Without Damian. Who he really was. The boy was but a shell of himself, and it was starting to make you all feel hopeless, to not find a solution to all of this. 

************

You were driving home from your office in town, trying to think of a way to bring your son back, as you did this past two week, when...Were you dreaming ? How was that even possible ?! 

No, but it was...Was it ? 

You smashed the breaks on your car, and it drifted a little bit on the gravel road leading to Wayne Manor. 

You exited your car and...There, sitting calmly in front of the gate, was Titus. 

But was it really him ? 

“Titus ?” 

The dog whipped around, and his tail excitedly went from left to right. He started to run to you and..Yes, no doubts. 

You could recognize the way he was licking your face, and his size, and that little spot behind his ear...It was really Titus ! 

And he had a tennis ball in his mouth ?

But...How did he- ?! 

Ah well, it didn’t matter. Because he was back ! 

Damian ? Where was Damian ?!

Oh, right. At school. Should you just put Titus in your car and drive to his school ? Ah but school would end in less than an hour, and driving all the way over there would take longer. 

Well, maybe you should just prepare him a nice surprise ? 

************

When you came down in the bat cave with Titus, Ace lost his mind. 

The poor dog jumped in the air, and excitedly ran to his “little brother” (who actually was bigger than him) to give him the best greeting ever ! 

Ace ran around Titus, and they both jumped at each others, playful. They then rolled around the floor together, cuddling. Titus was clearly happy to be home ! 

Bruce just stood there, staring at the dogs, not quite believing his eyes. Oh but you could understand of course, because you felt the same ! 

Titus was home. 

Titus was home ! 

************

As you waited for Damian, Bruce ran some test on Titus, just to make sure the dog was alright, you know ? 

After all, he supposedly spend two weeks all alone in the wild ! 

Bruce found some lead stuck in his fur, and quickly cleaned him as the metal was quite a toxic one. But just as quickly, he came up with an explanation as to where was Titus, and why neither Clark, nor Jon or Conner could find him ! 

“Superman’s supervision doesn’t work through lead. We can assume his sense of smell and hearing work the same ?” 

The lead in Titus’ fur made Bruce do some research and...There was an entire area in Smallville’s forrest, that had lead deep in its ground. Bruce theorized that Jon’s thrown ball fell at the bottom of a cave, that had a small entrance in which only a dog could get in, and that was hard to spot even for people like Superman and the Superboys...and the rest was history. 

Titus really was a good boy. There was NO WAY he’d come back to his master without the ball his friend threw ! He clearly was expecting him to come back with it ! And so Titus went deep into that cave filled with lead, making him invisible to the Kents. 

Bruce guessed that the dog got lost, his senses overwhelmed by the cave, and only managed to get out later on. Then probably, when he came back to where Damian was, he realized the boy and the rest of the family left and...Went on a journey back home ! 

Bruce and you read weirder stories in the paper, about animals crossing the goddamn country just to find their owners again. Dogs were incredible creatures, truly. 

When your husband checked the walking distance from Smallville to Gotham, from Kansas to New Jersey...It said that a human walking at normal speed and taking breaks would take a little over 16 days. 

A dog ? As young and tonic as Titus ? Two weeks made sense. 

And sure, he looked a bit thinner than last time they saw him, but he clearly managed alright, as except for the dangerous lead stuck in his fur, Titus was healthy ! He was a hunting dog, after all...

Alfred was next to see the dog back, and Titus was as happy as the butler to see him ! Mainly because he knew the nice old man was the one who’d give him great leftover food...Alfred actually cooked an entire meal for Titus. 

Ah but the dog really deserved it ! 

************

Damian came home from school, feeling as blue as ever. 

He really tried to be more cheerful, for the sake of his family...but he couldn’t quite managed it yet. He wasn’t over Titus. He’d probably never be over Titus ! But he knew one day he would feel better. 

He knew one day, he could feel happy again. 

Except right now, his beloved dog’s disappearance was way too recent ! 

Damian opened the front door of the manor and was faced with all his siblings lined up, smiling brightly at him. Um, what was going on ? 

They went with him to the bat cave, refusing to tell him what was up and...

Damian’s heart leapt out of his chest. Could it be ? Was it really him ? No, impossible...And yet, the dog trotted excitedly towards him and...

Damian lost it. 

He ran to Titus, and fell on him, hugging him tight against him. 

The dog proudly let the tennis ball Jon threw on the floor, but Damian barely registered it...

He cried tears of joy, and felt like he could never let go of his dog again ! Titus, as nice and obedient as ever, just laid there, tail flapping and tongue out of his mouth, waiting for his little master to stop hugging him ! 

Damian cried and cried, burying his face in his fur, and repeating his name over and over again. 

Each time Damian said “Titus”, emotions overflowing in his voice, the dog’s ears would move as if he was waiting for Damian to tell him what to do...but the boy just wanted to hug his dog. 

It felt like such a heavy weight leaving all of your shoulders. You heard your children, Bruce and Alfred sigh in relief, and you were pretty sure you did it too. 

For the first time in two weeks, you all felt happy again. Because Damian was happy too. And in your family, when one was unhappy, everyone felt it. 

That’s how tight you all were. 

Damian was clearly struggling and heartbroken. And none of you could do anything about it, except for being there for him, hoping time would slowly heal his heart...

So seeing him right now, on his knees, holding his dog tight...It felt nice. 

It felt very nice. 

You didn’t even notice that almost two hours passed, as you all just looked fondly at Damian and Titus cuddling, crying and being the happiest of boys about finding each others again. 

************

The day he lost Titus was one of the worst one in Damian’s short life.

He went through a lot, in his early childhood with the Al’Ghuls, and yet...nothing compared to the lost of his dog. In fact, only losing you, his father, Alfred or one of his siblings could really hit him as hard as loosing his dog.

Realistically, Damian knew that Titus would die way longer than before he would. Dogs didn’t live as long as humans, unfortunately (though Damian watched “Frankenweenie”, and secretly tried to find a way to keep Titus well and alive for way longer than supposed to...). 

But Titus was still very young. Just like Damian was. 

It was in those moments, that you were reminded that your son really was just a child. And that no matter how tough he acts, certain things would break his heart. 

Damian was already your “baby”, but after that episode you took even more care in nurturing that child side he still had, no matter what the Al’Ghul did to him. Because he was, for now, still a little kid...

And as you decided to make even more sure that Damian would live as much a “normal” life as he could, Ace started to become extremely protective of Titus. 

Funny enough, it seemed to exasperate the great dane. You swore that you saw Titus roll his eyes more than once, as Ace shielded him for whatever danger ! You guessed dogs truly did resembled their masters, right ? 

Because Titus definitely had some Damian in him, and Ace some Bruce. It showed in their “attitudes”. 

In any case, this entire awful experience reminded all of you of a lot of things, and of what truly mattered. 

Family. 

And how the wellbeing of said family was dependent on everyone being happy. Truly. It made all of you even more aware of each others’, and even tighter. 

All thanks to Titus, who really wanted to be a good boy, and bring back that ball to his master !

The end. 

_________________________________________________

Another little bonus story, while I slowly but surely write bigger, more developed stuffs :) (like chapter two of the Batfam being thrown in the Marvel world :)). I still hope you liked this short very self-indulgent fic I wrote in a very short span of time while being extremely sleep deprived and sad. And...Boom. As usual, feedbacks and reblogs are beyond appreciated. 

[kawaiijellymonster]

So I’ve got a note in my notes app called “Fanfic lines that should be in a hall of fame” and it’s gotten pretty long so I figure I’ll toss it on here so yall can enjoy it, most of them are: mha, zukka, miraculous ladybug, harry potter, and I think one is from a comment on a hannibal amv, But here you go:

Stain sold papers because he just had an aura about him that drew people in, like people who slow down to look at car crashes.

“The Rumor Come Out: Does Todoroki Shoto is Gay?”

Izuku spent the next week going to his normal martial arts classes, studying, and drinking gallons of coffee. Not healthy but he could deal with it. His body was never meant to be permanent.

So no one was watching when Mei placed her forehead against his, breath fanning across his face as she spoke. "Wake up Loki… the world needs you."

“No probs ‘lil listener!” Hizashi said, striking a dramatic pose. “I’ll be your DJ all through the night, bringin’ you such rockin’ hits as safety, security and sweet dreams!”

“This is stupid! Screw the waiting and screw these stupid butterflies. They're not paying rent, the little shits--”

Experimenting with unstable genetic mutant abominations is more of an art than a science, really."

Several looks pass across both their faces. “No flying for a month,” Sirius declares. That sucks, actually. But he’s also a hundred percent certain he can get them to cave on that in two weeks tops. “Okay. Is that for the breaking into the Ministry, destroying the Department of Mysteries, making a bargain with Voldemort, or bringing all my friends with me?” “It’s for recklessly endangering your own life again,” Remus says, “and while the punishment very much doesn’t fit the crime, we’re a bit at a loss for what else to do.” “It wasn’t reckless!” he protests. “We had a plan and everything, and we even brought an adult! An adult Order member! Also what else were we supposed to do, let Snape die?” Sirius takes a deep breath, but Remus steps on his foot before he can put it in his mouth. “Which is why you’re only getting flying privileges taken away and not thrown in a cell in Azkaban for our sanity and your safety.” As if any cell could hold him. “I accept your terms.”

“Who’s Theophania?” Sirius asks. Harry hesitates. Perhaps bringing her up was his smartest decision, strategically speaking. “If I tell you you’re not allowed to throw me in Azkaban. Or ground me.” “This isn’t a negotiation,” Sirius repeats. If Blaise has taught him anything, it’s that everything is a negotiation. “She’s a friend.” “And?” Sirius repeats. Remus suddenly grabs onto Sirius’s shoulder, “Wait. Petrifying - during your second year - is Theophania - she’s not the basilisk.” “No, they killed it,” Sirius says automatically. Harry remains silent. “Harry!” He rubs his nose. “It turns out I’m not that good at killing things. Unkilling things, however? My specialty.”

“It’s okay,” Nanaia says, “you don’t know. What do you do when you don’t know something?” “Try something you do know and hope it doesn’t make everything worse?” For some reason, Horace looks sad at that answer, and Dumbledore shifts from one foot to the other. “No,” she says, “you ask for help.” Oh.

“It’ll piss off your son,” he answers bluntly. “Fuck that kid,” Riddle Sr. says

“You played me!” “Like a cheap kazoo”

Batman sighed, before speaking in a voice that was so unlike his usual growl that most of the other League members almost fell out of their chairs. Diana and Clark seemed to be used to it. “Damian,” he started. His voice was still deep, but a regular-deep, instead of I-just-swallowed-six-buckets-of-gravel deep.

“She loved James too,” she assures, and the confidence she says that with allows him to breathe, like someone has let go of his lungs. “It is possible to love more than one person at the same time. She loved your father with the type of love that’s – that was like a shooting star, burning and bright and touching everyone around them. Her love for Severus was different, and in the end it wasn’t the type of love either of them could handle.”

You’re better at it now then many people are after leaving a full apprenticeship, and you’ve only had a year of lessons a couple of times a week instead of years of intensive study. Do you know why that is?” “Luck?” he offers weakly. For some reason, he doesn’t like the direction this is going in. “No,” she says. “To be good at healing, the way you are, the way I am, you need a certain combination of things. Intelligence, power, control, but more than that. Stubbornness, a tricky balance of flexibility and inflexibility, and a constant, brutal assessment over your own skills. And something else.” “A propensity towards poor life choices?” he suggests. Poppy shakes her head, not taking the bait. “No. You have to care. You have to care about everyone, even people you dislike, and you have to care so much that if feels like it’s killing you, you have to care and that care has to hurt, until the only thing that hurts worse than caring is not caring. To be good at this, you have to let it hurt you.”

“You two shouldn’t have bothered dressing formally for Albus, he’s a bitch.” Harry doesn’t have any idea what’s going on, but he’s loving it.  

“It was on the syllabus,” Zuko whispered conspiratorially to his mother. Sokka gasped. “You know I don’t read those!” “This is your own fault then.” “I like to be surprised. The procrastination keeps me humble.”

sometimes you remind me of the stars youre gorgeous and happy and can always brighten me on the darkest days and even when youre dampened you can guide me home

“imagine you are the only person who loves to play chess more than anything but nobody else in the world has ever heard about chess. and then you see a person holding a chessboard. it’s like your whole world was reborn”

"I wanted to be a stripper in middle school," Izuku said. Yup, that's a good cover.

What you’re asking for isn’t fair or right. You can’t ask a person for more than they’re willing to give

In Mei’s words, “You have about five minutes of ‘fuck that one thing in particular.’ Make them count.”

“Mei, let me introduce your new best friend. This is Momo. She has a Quirk that lets her make anything as long as she knows its composition inside and out. All you have to do is buy her dinner,“ Izuku said,

The cameras were looped. The bots were hacked. It was a good day to be a villain.

“None. The alarm never left the building.” “Really? Why is that?” “Mei finished first and decided to do you a favor. However, you've got the fire alarm just starting to go off and that's on a different circuit. Take a fast way down.” “Understood,” Hitoshi drawled. A moment later he was looking back at the crew. “Ladies and Frenchman. We take the express.”

Quinn is talking like that actually answers his question when it really, really doesn’t. “If you don’t start making sense, I’ll cry.”

“You’re one of my best students,” ze says. “You should understand the importance of timing. Speaking of, you’re late for your next class.”

Fuck, he totally is. “Thank you for that very confusing answer. I’ll think of you while crying myself to sleep.”

He’d wondered if that was what bravery was, to be quiet even when you were hurting so much you wanted to scream.

maybe bravery was also running screaming at the thing that nearly killed you, to keep it from killing someone else.

“Apologies are not difficult. Good apologies revolve around three basic points. One, I acknowledge what I did was wrong. Two, I regret that you were harmed. Three, this is how I plan to make sure it does not happen again. That’s all. Apologies are easy.” Then she’d glanced at them all again, evaluating. “And if you become very, very good at your job... they will be the absolute hardest thing you ever do.”

“Even though we’re a bunch of migraine-inducing hellions who are smart enough to know when something is a bad idea and stupid enough to still do it?”

“You’re like the nice china that Al only brings out for Christmas. Except Bruce just realised that I stole it, and chipped it. Maybe it’s time I give it back before I shatter all the pieces.”

she won’t co-parent my perfectly reasonable and well-behaved children.” Clark snorts. “Damian’s trying to stab Tim, right now.”

"Oh, my knight in shining armour. What would I do without you?" the teen droned, placing a dramatic hand on her head. 

"I think you mean 'knight in shining leather', M'Lady. And without me, you would be left alone in this kingdom of lies.”

"It's a kingdom, alright. It'll topple sooner or later." "That's the spirit!" Adrien laughed.

Here’s something that a harbinger of tragedy would never find the courage to admit: there are moments in between the bitter self-hatred and the visceral, tangible consequences of your sins in which you almost think you’re worthy of forgiveness; of second chances; of a life beyond your greatest regrets. It’s a unique brand of pain,

“Go directly to horny jail. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.”

“You can’t wait around for him to be sorry,” Izuku says. He’s quiet now. This isn’t something that’s meant to be shouted. “Maybe he’ll never be sorry. Maybe he doesn’t know he did anything wrong, or he doesn’t care. It doesn’t matter.” Cautiously he takes a step forward. “You can’t depend on the people who hurt you to be the ones to make it better, or it’s never going to get better. They’ll only disappoint you, or hurt you even worse, and then they’ll be gone and you’ll be waiting forever.”

Midoriya may be strong as hell, but that just means looking out for him has to be a team effort.

How would his new adoring fans react if they knew he raised a villain? He's no All-Might. His pillar's made of toothpicks, and it's not gonna take much to crack it.”

Tensei approaches Rei, “Okay, this plan is childish, unprofessional, and a discourtesy to this school's reputation. That being said, when do we nail the little twat?

Hinata is dead. Deceased. Passed away, laid to rest with a headstone that reads Here Lies Hinata Shouyou, Killed By A Wink And A Blown Kiss.

It’s dangerous to be a bad father when you have life insurance

[bigfan-fanfic]

Making Bad Look Good Part 2

A second part! Featuring... Two-Face, Deathstroke, Deadshot, Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy, Mr. Freeze, Mad Hatter, Hush, Zsasz, Klarion the Witch Boy, and the Court of Owls!

I got a ton of requests for these, and you’ve all been so helpful! This one’s for you!

Making Bad Look Good part 2 - a.k.a. another 6 Degrees of Evil Bacon

Warning: Long post ahead.

Two-Face - Harvey Dent

You met Two-Face back when he was District Attorney for Gotham.

He was no “Ce-SEAL-Your-Fate” Horton from Central City, but he was doing a bang-up job putting criminals behind bars, cracking their insanity pleas.

So you went to meet him after a case where he got the Penguin sentenced to Blackgate instead of Arkham.

Sure, he’ll probably escape, but the precedent the case sets is important.

“Mr. Wayne! To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Just came to meet our amazing new D.A.”

You make small talk, until you decide to ask him to lunch to congratulate him on the case.

He grins. “Okay. But we’ll flip a coin for the check. Heads, you pay. Tails, my treat.”

You shrug.

He flips a strange coin that he tells you is his lucky charm.

It comes up heads, on the side that looks like it’s been corroded.

You smirk. “That’s a double-headed coin, isn’t it?”

He laughs. “Yup. Most people don’t get it so quick.”

He shakes your hand and offers to pay anyway since you were such a good sport.

After he becomes Two-Face, it’s this moment you choose to remember...

Deathstroke and Deadshot - Slade Wilson and Floyd Lawton

There have been quite a few times when you were targeted by an assassin or two.

But that particular time, you were the prize for a competition between them.

Slade and Lawton had been hired to take you out, but only the actual killer would get the other half of the payment.

So one day, Deadshot is setting up the hit, angling a crazy shot to hit you through the back of the skull and bamboozle all ballistics tests. You come into range, and he shoots -

-only to see you get shoved out of the way by the eyepatch-ed Slade Wilson.

Bruce wants to sequester you in the Batcave, but instead, you tell him to set up a meeting as Batman.

It’s fun to throw money at problems.

On a rooftop, the Bat behind you, you offer Slade and Lawton double the total for your contract to give you the name of their employer and void the hit.

It’s technically against whatever assassin code there is, but you know, money tends to grease the wheels of any machine.

Deadshot takes the money and tells you it was some crackpot billionaire trying to get at Bruce. He also chuckles and says that he’s available if you ever have more money to throw and a grudge for him to carry out.

Deathstroke also takes the money and nods at you before leaving.

And while Slade comes back to torment you and your sons time and again, Floyd is actually quite pleasant. You sometimes hire him when you need security, which he calls easy money, and from that point, your husband almost never encounters him on the job...

Harley Quinn - Dr. Harleen Frances Quinzel

“Paging Dr. Quinzel. Dr. Quinzel, to the front desk.”

You and some other Gotham big shots were invited to Arkham for a publicity tour. Reporters are there, too, including Clark, so you feel pretty safe.

A surprisingly young woman comes to play tour guide, her hair in slight pigtails.

“Hello, I’m Dr. Quinzel. Currently I’m junior psychologist here at Arkham Asylum.” She has a bit of a New York accent, though you can tell she’s worked hard to soften it.

One reporter asks just how “junior” she is, and she gives an indulgent chuckle. “Yes, I graduated med school early, so I’m a bit young for a specialized doctor. But I’m also one of the only medical professionals still willing to work at Arkham, so I think that’s what counts, right?”

The tour goes well enough, until you raise your hand. “You’re the psychologist in charge of the Joker, right?”

Dr. Quinzel smiles in a strange way. “Yes, that I am.”

You frown. “And do you think, as a junior psychologist, you’re adequately prepared for him?”

“I know that I am a medical professional, Mr. Wayne, and I am certainly qualified to examine my patients.”

But Dr. Quinzel, just for a moment, looks fractured, torn. Like there’s some sort of internal war raging in her soul. But it gets absorbed in her too-wide smile.

You put it down to nerves about meeting the press, and let it go.

You always wonder if there was something you could’ve done for the woman, prevented it from all going wrong, prevented her from becoming Harley Quinn...

Poison Ivy - Dr. Pamela Isley

Pamela was going to college at about the same time you were. 

You weren’t friends, exactly, although you did both share a class in Professor Crane’s Intro Psych course (an elective for both of you).

There were a lot of rumors about her. You chose not to engage in the gossip, especially as it was a lot about her sleeping with her Biology professor for a better grade.

You had to do a project with her for your final grade, and she invited you to her apartment to work on it together.

It was full of plants. She mentions it before you have a chance to even think about bringing them up. 

“They’re my babies.” she jokes. “So much easier to take care of than pets.”

You smile. “All the oxygen probably helps you work better, right?”

She nods. “Yeah. Yeah, it does.”

She talks about how she’s going to be a botanist when she graduates, and she’s going to work for the EPA. She’s very self-interested, but genuine, and you have fun while working on the project.

But only a few weeks after you turn in the project, she disappears. Rumors abound about how she ran off with the Bio professor. Some say they were having an affair. Others are kinder and say they’re on a botanical conservation mission in some swamp somewhere.

Either way, you never see Pamela again.

At least, until Poison Ivy shows up in town...

(Side note: Drew Barrymore as Poison Ivy? Thoughts?)

Mr. Freeze - Dr. Victor Fries

Fries shows up one day out of nowhere

Just shooting with that cold gun.

He attacks a gala event for the Wayne Foundation and holds it up for jewelry and the cash being raised for the underprivileged of Gotham..

You glare at him. “You know you’re just taking money right out of the pocket of needy kids, right?”

“It’s for a good cause.” He says darkly.

“And what cause would that be?”

He sneers at you. “Disease research, mainly.”

The phrase surprises you.

Later, Bruce is doing research at the Batcave. “He goes by Mr. Freeze. Born: Victor Fries. Wife Nora suffers from Stage Four of a rare pneumonia-like condition known as MacGregor Syndrome. He had her cryogenically frozen, and now it seems like he’s turned to crime to fund his research into a cure.”

You hesitate. “Well... is there something we can do to help him?”

“Help him? May I remind you that he held hundreds of people hostage?”

“Well...” you shrug. “I just figure that maybe he wouldn’t be so... crime-y if his wife was being taken care of. I don’t know what I’d do if I was so close to losing you.”

Bruce softens slightly. “Look, Freeze committed a crime - several crimes, and he has to go to jail. But if it makes you feel better, we can have Wayne Enterprise’s medical division look into studying her disease. Judging from what I see here, MacGregor Syndrome has similarities with many other diseases. It might be a key in finding lots more cures.”

You smile and hug him. “Lead with that. Tell Fries that we’re willing to do that.”

Of course, Fries’ future crimes are due to the cost of maintaining his portable cryogenic suit, but you hear a lot less about it than you expect, especially since Nora is being taken care of...

Mad Hatter - Jervis Tetch

You were meeting a couple of old school friends at a tea parlor one day. It’s nice to escape the stress of your life and reminisce.

Roland and Alicia are a cute couple, and they tell you they have a baby on the way.

But the day is marred by a strange incident in which a small man in a top hat and tails (tuxedo tails) comes up to your table and starts babbling at Alicia, calling her “Alice” and trying to touch her blond hair, despite her attempts to shove him away..

Roland gets angry and punches the man, but before he can go any further, you pull him back.

The strange man glances at you. “The Dormouse...” he mutters, and walks away.

“What a creep.” Alicia shudders.

You’ve already figured it out. The man is deluded, thinking he’s the Mad Hatter, and he seems to be trying to fit everything into his Wonderland-inspired delusions. You tell Bruce about this, and he immediately agrees that Alicia is in danger.

You go to their hotel room to see them, warn them, but Roland answers the door wearing a bowler hat and Alicia is nowhere to be found.

Roland attacks you, knocking you out and kidnapping you.

Thankfully Bruce has been watching as Batman and follows.

You wake up tied to a chair around a tea table. Alicia is tied to another chair in an Alice-in-Wonderland costume, looking terrified. 

Jervis Tetch reveals himself and points out his minions, enslaved with his mind control headwear.

“Very spiffy, if I do say so myself.” you say cheerily. “Quite the milliner you are, my good sir.” (Alicia looks at you like you’re crazy)

Jervis loves the flattery, and it distracts him long enough for Batman to smash through the glass ceiling and knock the hat off his head, disabling the control.

Sure, no one was hurt much, but needless to say you would have to visit Alicia and Roland in the future instead of ever having them come to Gotham...

Hush - Dr. Tommy Elliot

“We’re having lunch with an old friend of mine.” Bruce announces.

You raise an eyebrow. “Wait a minute. Why don’t I know who this is? We have pretty much all the same old friends. I mean, we were together, like, all the time.”

“You remember Tommy, right?”

“Tommy? No, Tommy doesn’t ring a bell, hon.”

Bruce sighs, and you laugh. This is as animated as you’ve seen him in a while. “Come on, Tommy Elliot! Back when we were little! We used to play Robin Hood together in the park, and you two always fought over who got to be the Sheriff of Nottingham?”

“Yeah, nope. No memory of that.”

He sighs, but you go with him anyway. It hits you when you see the man at the restaurant. He was that kid! His parents were friends with Bruce’s parents. They had almost died in an accident when Bruce’s dad saved them.

He’d always try to play this strategy game thing with you and Bruce. It was only two players, and while he’d always beat Bruce (your husband wasn’t always the tactician he was now), he’d get really frustrated playing against you.

Tommy liked to try and get inside your head to beat you, figure out what you were going to do and then planning for it.

But you could tell what he was doing, and kept doing random moves you wouldn’t normally play, throwing him off and winning.

You didn’t like him much, and you kinda got the feeling he didn’t like Bruce that much either.

“Oh. That Tommy.”

Bruce looks at your worried face. “What’s wrong? If you really don’t want to, we can cancel.”

“Oh, hush. We’re already here. Least we can do is have a nice lunch...”

Zsasz - Victor Zsasz

It’s never a good sign when a payphone rings. So many bad reasons...

Not the least of which is that barely anyone even uses payphones anymore.

Let alone to call another payphone. I mean, how does that even work?

So it startles you when you’re walking Gotham (during the day, of course), and a payphone rings. No one else is around to answer it. 

You start to walk away, and then the next payphone rings when you reach it.

The other guy near it jumps like fifty feet in the air, but then goes to answer it.

He looks scared. “It’s... it’s for you.”

You sigh and take the phone

“Ignoring my calls? Naughty...”

“Um... wrong number. This is a payphone, not, uh, whoever you were calling.”

“This isn’t Y/N Wayne?”

“Yeah, no, it isn’t. May I ask who’s calling, though?”

“I know it’s you, Y/N. You don’t know me. Yet.”

“Look, I know Halloween’s coming up, but I’m not in the mood for Scream right now, okay?”

“This isn’t a scary movie, it’s real. My name is Zsasz.”

“Z- zsa... okay, how is that spelled?”

“Z. S. A. S. Z.”

“Oh, that’s beautiful. If you don’t mind me asking, is that Polish?”

“...What?”

“Sorry, I have to run, but it was nice talking to you!”

You run home and immediately tell Bruce you talked to Zsasz. Luckily you were running a trace with your phone - a little extra Tim developed for you. Within the hour, Batman has Zsasz in custody, saving the poor people he had kidnapped to add to his tally...

Klarion the Witch Boy

“Oh, hello! Who are you, little guy?”

The orange tabby glares at you with utter hate. It flicks its tail, but surprisingly, comes closer and curls around your legs.

It allows you to pick it up, and it purrs.

“Teekl! My word!” a boy comes running up to you, wearing a tailored suit and a newsboy cap. 

The boy snatches the tabby from you and pets it, despite how it looks like it wants to go back to you. “What were you doing with Teekl?”

“That’s its name? He’s a cute little guy. Uh, he just wandered in front of me and basically asked me to pet him.”

The boy glares at the cat. “You TALKED to him?”

The cat looks at him and rolls its eyes.

“Um, who are you, kid?”

He looks at you incredulously. “Seriously, mortal? You haven’t heard of me? I am Klarion! Klarion the Witch Boy! And this is my familiar, Teekl.”

You nod seriously. “Good for you, kid.”

He seems about to throw a tantrum, so you wave and leave the boy dumbfounded...

The Court of Owls

“Beware the Court of Owls, that watches all the time,

Ruling Gotham from a shadowed perch, behind granite and lime.

They watch you at your hearth, they watch you in your bed,

Speak not a whispered word of them

Or they’ll send the Talon for your head...”

“That’s a stupid poem. It doesn’t even keep time.”

“It’s free verse.”

“Yeah, free ‘cause no one would pay for it.”

You and Bruce were only kids when you heard the old rhyme. Bruce was trying to scare you as a Halloween season joke, but it wasn’t working.

“Come on, Y/N! At least pretend to play along!”

Thomas Wayne enters the living room, and pretends to scold Bruce. “Now, Bruce, be hospitable to your guest. What’s the argument about?”

You smirk. “Bruce says that there’s a Court of Owls who eat limes and put talons on people’s heads.”

Thomas hunches down, making a spooky face. “Well, Y/N, it’s an old Gotham story. It’s a very bad thing that Bruce told you. You’ll have to be very careful now.”

He looks dead serious, and now you’re scared. “Really? What should I do, Mr. Wayne?”

He puts a hand on your shoulder. “You’ll have to be a very good kid all your life, Y/N. Never go out after dark without your parents’ permission. Don’t ever cheat on a test. Don’t lie. And if you ever see someone in an Owl mask, look the other way and forget you saw it.”

He grins, dropping the facade. “I’m sorry, Y/N, I just couldn’t help it. Hope I didn’t scare you too badly.”

Being a stubborn child, you insist he didn’t. After all, you’re old enough not to be scared by that stuff anymore.

But on the way home, after your parents pick you up, you notice something.

A tall figure in an alley, wearing a stylized white Owl mask.

You quickly look away, trying to put it out of your head, mumbling the rhyme to yourself.

“Beware the Court of Owls...”

You forget about this until far later in life, after you, as Y/N Wayne, have become an enemy of the dreaded Court...

[sweetwriting]

TimKon Week 2020 Day 4: Happy Birthday to You!

Category: Gen or Pre-slash

Genre: Angst/Fluff, mostly fluff

Fandoms: DC Comics, Teamverse

Continuity: Post-Crisis/Pre-Flashpoint Future AU

Summary:  What kind of birthday party do you give a kid who was abused by her parents when your own birthdays were already outside of the norm?

Word Count: 1840

AN:  Hola everyone. This was inspired by an old WIP of mine. it's kind of a plot bunny of a different fic. Anyway enjoy

Prompt:  Raising A Child - Fluff

Can be read on AO3

October 16th

It was Helena’s first birthday with them. Tim didn’t know what to do. To be fair he wasn’t familiar with children’s birthdays. Most of his had been spent with his parents being brought to shows he liked or that they’d thought he’d like. And then they forgot it one year and the next they were out of commission.

Helena came from an abusive home and he didn’t want to overwhelm her too much as she had been prone to having panic attacks when he didn’t pay attention and did something that was apparently outrageously nice. So he wanted her to have a great birthday but not so outrageous she’d faint.

Conner had made fun of him because he was apparently over worrying over “normal stuff”, but Conner was the last person allowed to talk to him about that. Partly because he hadn’t celebrated a normal birthday of his….ever, but also because the only kid’s birthdays he had gone to were Traya’s and Jon’s.

Still Conner had been there since the beginning so he kind of had a say in what they’d be doing for her birthday.

Speaking of which, they were supposed to meet for lunch for that exact purpose and Conner was late. For the 3rd time this week. It was getting real annoying real fast.

He looked at his phone to see if he had received any new message. And he had. Apparently Conner was late because he was walking with a classmate of his and couldn’t use his powers. So Tim waited.

Ten minutes later, Conner finally appeared around the corner. With a very pretty girl on his arm. Tim couldn’t believe Conner was late because he was flirting...Actually he could…He probably would have been too if he were in his place…If it was just a normal lunch but they were supposed to talk about Helena’s birthday! It was not a normal lunch.

Conner waved goodbye after the pretty girl kissed his cheek and then “sprinted” toward Tim who was crossing his arms in annoyance. As he arrived next to him Conner looked sheepish.

“Look I know what it looked like but she started talking about a school project at first and I couldn’t blow her off and then she said we were walking in the same direction so I had to….and then I used the opportunity, I wasn’t gonna miss that but still!”

Tim raised an eyebrow, just to mess with him but Conner saw right through him, untangled his arms by taking one of his hand and dragging him toward the restaurant Tim had been waiting in front of.

They settled down and started having their lunch when Tim received a new email notification. Which he showed to Conner. Now that could be a nice present.

- - - - - - - -

October 21st

Helena had had a fairly good day so far. Tim and Kon had woke her up with a cup of sweet tea and croissant while wishing her a happy birthday, Kon had even decided to accompany her alongside Tim this morning (even if he was gonna be late to class). Ana and Alois had also wished her a happy birthday and none of their teachers had given them any test.

Now it was time to go home and wait for Tim and Kon to come back home (well…Technically Kon already had his own apartment but he was there so rarely she hadn’t known about it for 7 months, when he talked about being with his girlfriend which had brought a new surprise as she had also thought he was in love with Tim. Even if they had told her immediately they weren’t).

Whatever. She hoped her da they wouldn’t be too long to get home as she usually was one her own for about three hours on her own before Kon would be there. And it had been so nice up until now.

But when she got out of the school, both Tim and Kon were waiting for her? Along with Bart, Cassie, Rose and Kiran.

She ran toward them and hugged Tim and Kon at the same time…kind of, she was way too small to manage but she tried and she considered that it was what mattered. She then went to hug the other four. Apparently they were gonna celebrate her birthday together. The only things missing were her Tim and Kon’s families. And a few others. Granted too many of them might be a bit too much for her. Family dinners at Wayne Manor were already too much even if there was never the full family roster at once.

When they arrived home however Anita and Cissie were waiting for them along with Donald and Oshi who lived with Anita and Cissie’s parents. Helena liked them, well…mostly Oshi. Most of the time Donald was not fun. They were a bit older than her but always nice.

They all ate very small pieces of cake (but her par Tim and Kon prevented her from eating more than two small pieces) and celebrated (with presents and everything). However at 4:30PM they had to leave though Bart promised he’d come back later. Only to be replaced by Jon, Ma, Lois and Clark. Who celebrated with a different, but still small, cake. At 6PM, they left too, only to be replaced by Dick, Alfred, Barbara, Bruce and Cass. With another cake. Now she understood why Tim and Kon had refused to let her eat more than two pieces every time.

So far this was the best birthday ever!

Her fath Tim and Kon had basically allowed her to celebrate her birthday with her favorite people without getting overwhelmed. She was getting tired though and nodding off on Dick’s lap. That was their cue to start leaving. Though Cass was staying with them for the night as would Bart.

Once they were all gone Tim and Kon had asked Cass if they could leave them alone. Once they did, they all sat down on the carpet. They both looked pretty serious. Oh no. She should have known it was too good to be true. But she had started getting used to this life. Was this whole birthday thing just there to butter her up? They were never this serious with her unless they were talking about her parents and her stay here with her foster dad, Tim.

Oh nononononononono. Did her parents get the right to get her back? No. Last she’d seen them they were trash talking the Court assigned parenting classes they were supposed to take. They shouldn’t be able to take her back.

Suddenly she felt a familiar weight on her shoulders and she heard Tim say “it’s okay, it’s not bad news, it’s simply important”.

The next few minutes were spent with Kon tracing circles against her back and Tim guiding her breathing until she calmed down.

Once that was done she was slowly being glided on Kon’s lap, probably by the hands on her shoulders, even if she felt like she was in a warm cocoon, she loved his TTK so much. Kon kept tracing small circles on her back while Tim was patting her head slowly.

That was actually rather nice. The only good part about her panicking way too easily.  

But then Tim pulled away and got papers out of his bag. That was the cue to return to the conversation that hadn’t even started yet.

Tim took a big gulp of air. He seemed nervous. Which was making her nervous, but then Kon was hugging her and she felt better. She felt him nod against her.

“Ok so, it’s been a bit more than a year since you were found in the street and we hadn’t been able to celebrate your birthday back then aside from getting you actual clothes and furniture and a cake, so I wasn’t sure how to do this but I think up until now we managed pretty well. Now since your parents never made an effort to go to the court mandated parenting classes during that time, It’s actually possible for you to be adopted as of last week.”

She could feel her heart start shrinking. They were going to make her go away.

“Which is why I sent a form as soon as I was allowed to do so. Now of course it’ll depend on whether or not you also want to become officially my kid. I merely sent the form so that I could have the papers ready when we talked about it so here goes.

Helena, would you like to officially become my child and live with me until you decide you’re too good for me and move out to live your life even if you’ll always have a room here ? We had already kind of talked about it but it always seemed too soon for that. It’s nothing to feel pressurized about. I won’t be mad if you don’t want to and we just won’t sign the papers. It won’t change the fact that I love you and you’ll always have a home here if you want to”

Helena froze. She had been staying here for a year. Tim and Kon had taken care of her so much. But what if it was like with her previous adopted parents? They had loved her very much before her dad decided to close his shop. On the other hand Tim and Kon had Cass and Bart and Dick and everyone else also looking after her. She knew she could talk to them and be listened to. At least Bart and Cass would listen to her (Dick tended to be a bit blind about Tim’s shortcomings which was pretty cute most of the time but could be irritating at others). She could feel her eyes start to well up when she heard a voice from behind her.

“Maybe it was too much. We should probably wait before telling her the other news”.

She turned to Kon and asked him in the most polite way she could muster what he meant.

“What? What is it? Kon? You can’t just say that and not tell me! That’s no fair!”

He looked above her head at Tim and he probably received a positive answer because he smiled and explained.

“Tim and I signed a Co-Parenting agreement. Of course it’s only if you accept his adoption and want me to be involved too but…yeah, I’d like to be your official parent too”.

She was crying now.

They wanted her too.

They really did.

It wasn’t just wishful thinking. It wasn’t them just being nice to her because she was sad. It’s not like they had never told her they loved her but it was always so hard to believe, even if they showed it every day.

“As if I’d say no to that !”

And she launched herself at Tim with Kon right behind him who scooped them in a hug.

This was the best birthday ever.

AN:    - Alright so here Donald and Oshi are Anita's parents who returned to an infant state in YJ. As such they’re like a couple years older than Helena.

- Helena is, in fact, Helena Kyle (her favorite color is obviously Red, that's why she imprinted on Tim). Basically her parents were nice at first but life became hard and they ended up moving to try their chance in Cali and it didn't work out so they took it on her. Red Robin now Flamebird found her right after she ran away and took her to the emergencies where she met Conner who was waiting for them (Tim had called on the way) so Tim could disappear and change. So until she learned their secret IDs, she thought the first one she had met was Conner even if only by a few minutes. Also she calls him Kon 'cause she doesn't like Conner as a name. She writes it "Con" to people who don't know about the secret (because that's how she wrote it when she thought it was just a nickname). She just turned 8 - Jon was born a year after Canon ended for the Pre Flashpoint universe so he's a year and a half - two years younger than Helena. - Bart, Conner and Cass have their own room because of how often they come. - Tim and Kon live in California. They moved there a couple of months before finding Helena. Kon needs sun ok. Tim's working fo the police station as a civilian working his way up so he can have his two years of work in law enforcement so he can open his detective agency with KOn. Kon's a double major of Law and Psychology (with a minor in international Law)

[dick-g-ayson]

Offer Me + Batlantern, maybe? Hal keeps giving Bruce things, and it takes Bruce way too long to understand why. Bonus points: Alfred (and maybe the kids) being exasperated by Bruce - World's Greatest Detective who?

He doesn't know how or why, or if someone is just trying to be funny, but he will get to the bottom of it.

Bruce frowns, blue eyes dark with suspicion, as he stares down at the object in his hand. A simple clear case, filled with iridescent blue, green, and purple stones. Left sitting innocently on his work bench in the Cave.

This wasn't the first time he had discovered something left for him in recent weeks.

The first was just over a month ago. A simple envelope taped to the door of his quarters on the Watchtower. It had been a set of 3 tickets to a ballet and classical theater fusion performance of A Midsummer Night's Dream. He had been suspicious then, but had remembered mentioning the play in passing one day to Clark and Diana before a meeting, and how much Jason and Cassandra would both enjoy it. So hadn't thought much about it beyond that, thinking that one of his friends or another league member overheard, and had acquired some tickets.

It wouldn't be the first time that such an occurrence had happened; though never to himself.

A week later there had been a completed and closed case file on his desk in his office. Also at the Watchtower. A string of sporadic robberies in Gotham, all surrounding occult and space enthusiast shops. The thief had been going for similar objects in all of them. Toys, models, and replicas of communication devices. The case had been a thorn in his side for nearly two weeks.

He had consulted several out-of-planet League members about the robberies, and they had given him a few options to try and suss out the obviously stranded alien.

Then, like magic, the case file had appeared on his desk. The day before he was planning on implementing his first strategy.

Flipping through it didn't reveal the one responsible, but it did explain the mystery.

A wandering Czarnian's ship had been hit by a meteor and they had crash landed on Earth. Their translator had been damaged and so they were unable to communicate. Having scared one human already, they did not want to risk causing a panic. Instead, they had broke into several establishments that looked like they might have what the Czarnian needed to get help. The stranded alien not realizing they were novelty shops.

Reading through the file hadn't narrowed down his parameters as to who could be leaving him such things; the way it was written not giving a clue to the report writers identity. He could at least ask those who had been on, or around, Earth at the time about who had solved his case. However when he asked both John and Jessica the two Lanterns denied knowing anything about it. J'onn was also at a loss, as he had been across the planet helping with a humanitarian effort, along with some members of Young Justice.

He was left bewildered and without answers. Again.

Which brought him to his current problem, and third gift. A collection of interesting minerals that he had expressed interest in some months ago on a mission with the JLA. There was a sample that was large enough to keep for display purposes. There were also several other smaller samples that he could experiment with, and try to synthesize duplicates using elements easier to find on Earth.

The click of shoes on metal and stone, as someone descends the staircase into the Cave, distracts him briefly from his thoughts. He looks up to see Tim and Alfred making their way down the spiral stairs, and feels a bit of relief. Tim had been on that mission with them, along with Nightwing.

He could ask Tim.

If any of his sons had noticed something off about that mission, and could shed a light on the mystery person behind these...gifts, it would be his third son.

"Tim. Do you know anything about this?" Bruce holds up the case of minerals as soon as Tim is close enough.

"Are those the deposits you had mentioned a few months ago?"

"Yes. Do you know where they came from."

"From space, B. Remember?"

The smirk Tim has on his face has Bruce rolling his eyes. Tim is usually so straight-faced and serious, that everyone, including Bruce himself, often forgets that Tim has a biting wit and keen sense of humor when he wants to. There's a reason Tim and Jason get along so well.

Alfred huffs a quiet laugh as he makes his way to the medical area, to start on his inventory for the week.

Bruce takes a breath, asking the universe for patience. "Yes, Tim, I remember. I meant more how did they get in the Cave."

Tim takes the case from Bruce once he reaches him, turning it over in his hands. He stops when he sees the familiar symbol on the bottom of the case. "The Lanterns do delivery now?" His small smirk is still on his face as he hands the case back to Bruce. "Wish I'd known that, I have some samples myself I'd like to get ahold of."

"Lanterns? Lanterns don't deliver." Bruce looks down at the symbol on the bottom of the case, before placing it back on his work bench. He makes his way over to the big computer, purpose in his strides.

Tim follows behind, smile still on his face. "True, not in general no. They have been known to make the occasional exception though. "

"When?"

Tim flinches, not at the sharpness of Bruce's tone, but at the fact that he may have to tell his Father something his brother didn't want him to know.

He pulls his phone out of his pocket, texting Jason a warning without looking. "Kyle's brought Jay a few things once or twice."

Bruce glances at Tim out of the corner of his eye as he pulls up the security feed for the cave, but doesn't make any further comment. He knew that the younger Lantern and Jason were friends of a sort since their "space adventures" with Donna Troy. What things Kyle could be bringing is second son, Bruce isn't sure he wants to actually know.

He brings up the security feed for the day, as the box had not been there when Batman had called it a night at 3 that morning; setting it to run through at 3x it's normal speed.

He could feel Tim watching from over his shoulder, could just see him bouncing lightly on the balls of his feet.

"Tim...is there something you're not telling me?"

The teen tilts his head in thought, tapping a finger to his chin. "Nope, don't think so."

Bruce recognizes the light in Tim's blue eyes. He's being teased. Tim knew something he didn't, but it wasn't an important fact for Bruce, or Batman, to know. Which meant it was a societal thing that he had missed.

"Tim."

"Nope." He says, popping the 'p' obnoxiously. "We're having way too much fun."

"We? Who exactly is we?" Bruce shoots a glare over his shoulder at his smirking third child.

Tim just returns the glare with a wide smile, points of his teeth showing. "Well me, obviously. Dick, Jay, Steph, Clark, Diana, and Alfred."

Bruce holds the glare for a few extra moments before sighing, defeated. He turns back to look at the footage he had pulled up, muttering a sullen, "You were supposed to be the nice one."

Tim laughs, patting Bruce on the shoulder. "You left a lot of my training to Dick, remember? I also have Jason as an older brother, and I'm bestfriends with a speedster from the future and a clone of Superman. Sass is a survival instinct at this point in my life."

Bruce starts to say something in reply to that when the Cave's security finally reveals something useful.

Though still puzzling.

Very few League members had access to the Cave, let alone the ability to enter without the systems alerting the family. The only ones with such free access were the founding members of the Justice League; though it was rarely used by anyone other than Barry and occasionally Clark.

So to see Hal Jordan flying in through the waterfall entrance, take a quick look around before placing the case on his work bench, and leaving the same way he came in, leaves Bruce more than a bit confused.

He looked over his shoulder to question Tim again, only to find both his son and Alfred looking at him, knowing smiles on their faces. They say nothing however, both silent as they enjoy Bruce's struggling.

He opens his mouth once more to say something, but instead turns back to watch the replay of the footage; trying to puzzle out it's meaning.

'Why would Hal Jordan of all people, be leaving me...what? Gifts? '

He turns back around several minutes later, to find both Tim and Alfred gone. Leaving him alone in the Cave with his thoughts. He glances once more at the footage, staring at the paused image of Hal placing the case on his work bench, before shaking his head and heading to the lockers.

A good night of crime solving and punching criminals in the face, would hopefully help with his mood, and help get his thoughts in order.

Bruce stews over the odd revelation that Hal Jordan is leaving him gifts for several weeks, though no further gifts appear.

He'd gone back into the records once he realized Hal was the one leaving him things, and discovered that the Lantern always left shortly after the gifts had appeared. Like he didn't want to see how they were recieved. If the reaction was good or bad. As if he was nervous.

Not afraid

Hal didn't do fear. It was both an admirable and frustrating quality. One that all Green Lanterns shared, but that Hal himself seemed to have in spades.

Tim must have also let the others know, because he's been getting sly looks from Diana and Dick ever since; Tim and Clark have both been giggling at odd moments, and Jason. Jason has steadfastly avoided the Manor since.

Though that may be more due to the fact that he questioned what things Kyle Raynar may be giving him, rather than because he wouldn't be able to not hold back teasing his father.

When he had tried to talk out the puzzle with Alfred, his butler/father had only raised a silver brow elegantly at him and stated, "I was not aware I had raised a Detective that is so blind to the clues before him." And refused to help him further, or listen to his complaints.

So he had been forced to wallow in his own misery, for weeks, as he tried to figure out why a man who constantly argued with him, made his life hell, snarked and bantered almost as well as his Robin's, is kind to a fault, despite how much his life has shit on him, and even ( though he won't admit even on pain of death) made him laugh more than once in recent years, would be giving him..........

"Son of a bitch."

The final peice falls into place, hitting him like a swing from Harley's mallet. He leaves his quarters, moving with a speed usually dedicated to emergencies.

Luckily he's already on the Watchtower, and he knows, that for once, Hal is as well. He leaves his quarters, moving with a speed usually dedicated to emergencies. Thankfully he runs into no one on his travels through the halls of the Tower.

He reaches the landing dock where the Javelin sits primed and ready for flight at anytime. Hal is floating at it's underbelly, checking the machine over for damage.

There is no one there but himself and Hal. Another small stroke of luck Bruce is quietly thankful for.

Bruce makes sure to make noise as he enters the hangar; knowing that the silent way he and his family moved, unnerves quite a few members of the JLA. The fact that even Jason who wore more armour, and carried enough weapons to be classified as a moving armoury, could still move as quiet as a breeze annoyed a great many people.

Hal looks up when he hears Bruce cough as he enters the hangar, tilting his head backwards, looking at Bruce upside down. Brown hair almost like a halo as he floats beneath the Javelin.

"Bats. Y'need something?"

Hal rights himself and glides down to the deck below, touching down in front of Bruce as he reaches the shuttle, knees bent slightly as his feet meet the deck floor. He straightens up and brown eyes meet serious blue. Bruce's eyes look all over Hal's face, not entirely sure himself what he's looking for.

He watches as Hal brings his hand up, to rub at the back of his head, brown eyes looking over Bruce's shoulder, suddenly not meeting his eyes.

"If this is about the things I left for you, I can stop if you're not into it."

Nervousness creeps into his voice, and it's the willingness to show that sort of emotion out in the open that decides it for Bruce. He's honestly hoping he hasn't read the situation wrong. But going by the reaction of his family and his two closest friends, he's sure his own gift will be well recieved.

Hal starts only slightly as Bruce reaches up, one hand cupping Hal's jaw, turning him back to face Bruce.

Then Bruce's mouth is on his, gentle but firm, no hesitation. No fear.

Hal grins into it before bringing his own hand up to tangle in Bruce's short black hair, turning his head just slightly so he can kiss back properly.

It only takes a moment for the kiss to go from something chaste to decidedly not, as both parties reciprocate, using lips, tongues, teeth, and hands to say what words and gestures failed to.

Hal only breaks the kiss after his back hits the side of the Javelin, chuckling lightly as he catches his breath. "Well I'll be damned."

Bruce let's a small grin show himself, as he pulls back enough to look Hal in the eyes. "I'm sorry I'm not very good at -"

"I dunno, I though that was pretty good, but if it's practice you're lookin' for, I'm more than willing to be a Guinea pig."

Bruce scowls slightly, "I meant with words. Expressing emotion. I'm not good with that aspect of relationships, especially in my personal life. Just ask any of my children."

The teasing fades from Hal's smile as the hand he had wrapped around Bruce's hair starts carding through it softly.

"Oh, sweetheart, I went into this with eyes wide open. I know exactly what I'm getting into, and I'm in this for whatever it takes to get through that thick skull of yours."

"Good." Is all Bruce has to say on that as he pulls Hal back in.

They break apart again a few minutes later, and Hal is smirking against his mouth, nipping at the corner gently. "Took you long enough, Detective."

[whetstonefires]

While i was rifling thru your fic tag like a half-starved raccoon in a cake tin I found your clone Damian's fic & i'm in LOVE! And like, do u hav anymore meta on that verse? like how do the rest of the fam find out? how do they REACT?! how does Damian? does the heretic clone still exist? Just reading abt tim with a bunch of tiny dami's gave me heart palpitations. Thank you for this gift.

(In reference to this post.)

Why thank you!

It’s vaguely inspired by some meta @cerusee and @audreycritter did about what if Damian was one of several identical clones, but I’ve been fascinated by the character potential suggested by Damian having been cloned since Talia first revealed it, so.

Let’s see.

I don’t think the Heretic still exists, not in the form we saw. This story fragment sort of assumes Talia went less crazy than they made her for the whole Leviathan storyline; she doesn’t regard the clones as sons the way she does Damian (she totally relied on cloning to get him perfectly matched organ replacements, like that spine) but she’s not “sons are born to die in battle” “let’s grow him big inside a WHALE” levels of whacked out.

She hasn’t fully committed to having them compete to be selected as the official Damian #2, either, because she’s still attached to the original, though the growing prospect of that was a lot of the reason they ran for it. One of them might have wound up as the Heretic, in another timeline? But it was a timeline that diverged long before they fled the League.

So they make it to Tim’s emergency van without being intercepted, and get as far as his secure site on city limits, but they have to fight their way through the last leg of that trip and to make it inside the bunker, and it’s supplied for a siege but not really big enough for eight people, even if seven of them are small, and also staying there and being besieged would draw the attention of the Bats, which defeats the whole purpose of not making for the Cave/calling reinforcements.

So he calls his friends for extraction, and they all wind up in Kansas.

Tim puts off contacting the family until the clones have with his guidance sorted out exactly how they want to present themselves.

Unfortunately, the last stage of the ninja battle was showy enough not to be overlooked, so his absence was noticed much sooner than he expected, and regarded as more worrying. On the second day Dick calls Kon to see if he knows where Tim’s gotten to, and Kon fails to lie adequately.

Dick can’t pressure Kon as easily as he can most people because last time he asked Kon for a favor Kon came to the North Pole and died for him.

Which is the kind of thing even Nightwing isn’t veteran enough not to take seriously.

But he still calls his bluff and asks a bunch of questions, and winds up very suspicious and worried, so at this point Tim and the Damians have to hurry up and figure out how to announce the situation or go on the run from the Bats as well as the League, which would be. Not smart.

Tim explains the situation over videochat with the Cave before having the cloneboys join him on the feed; this spares them the worst of the yelling.

Bruce, Dick, and Damian all respond pretty badly. Bruce because he doesn’t like change and he’s reflexively suspicious, and having eight Damians to raise is a justly horrifying notion. Also anti-clone prejudice. It’s unfortunately an established trait of his, though not like. A strong one.

Dick because he’s really defensive of Damian, and perceives this first and foremost as an emotional threat to his bab’s fragile identity.

Damian because he knows exactly how he was raised to react to someone being in a place he wants, and he knows how many opportunities his father’s household policies gave him to take shots at Tim, and they may be six years old but there are seven of them. He is going to die.

All things considered, Damian’s being the most rational here.

He’s wrong though. The clones were raised as disposable ninjas, not princes; they’re perfectly well aware killing him would gain them nothing, and they have very little sense of entitlement.

Bruce and Dick do try to be nice to the kids once it’s finally settled they will be staying at the Manor at least for a bit, because they need to be somewhere safe and Bruce can’t leave them at Clark’s house forever. Even Ma Kent has her limits.

But Bruce blows bewilderingly hot and cold and Dick kind of makes a point of of not being too warm to them, because he’s loyal to his demon brat. Damian starts staying at his place a lot and consequently working with Nightwing instead of Batman.

Bruce has no idea what to do about this or if he even should do something. Damian’s thirteen, right? Teenagers are supposed to rebel??? This is a pretty harmless way to do that?

But he misses him.

This does lead to making more time for the Seven Identical Six-Year-Olds.

Their sense of morality revolves around having made the breakthrough to valuing on another’s lives; they aren’t as opposed to not-murder as Damian was but they’re also a lot harder to coax into seeing things his way because they don’t need as much from him, emotionally.

This makes them ironically less terrifying for Bruce, even if he’s still having trouble actually bonding with them the way he normally does with his kids.

Barbara meanwhile is cautious. She always takes a while to warm up to new people, and she doesn’t have Tim’s history with clones to get her over that speedbump. She tries very hard to be fair, but she’s not really welcoming. She’s Reserving Judgment.

Jason thinks this is the funniest thing ever and goes out of his way to tease Damian about it. Privately he’s super creeped out, but as that wears off he starts getting mad about Bruce and Dick making the kiddos feel unwelcome and at some point does a rant, and after that is vaguely protective in a useless sort of way.

He enjoys being a bad influence. The septuplets also enjoy this. They think he’s funny, too, and he’s easier to communicate with than most people around here. Achieves a fairly high tier on the Favorite Non-Clone Brother list they aren’t exactly keeping.

Cass is super about these kids. She can relate to them even more than to Damian, because they weren’t raised as heirs to anything and don’t have the sneering put-down form of pride going, and also she’s actually around to meet them at the crucial getting-to-know-you stage.

She thinks sparring one-on-seven is an excellent sibling bonding activity. There are assassin-child puppy piles once they’re all worn out. Many photos are taken.

She’s doing much better than Bruce at getting them to extend their nascent sense of empathy beyond one another, without actually making an effort. It’s not like they’re actually much behind their cohort when it comes to social development, they’ve just got murder conditioning flattening their affective empathy. (And are ahead of cohort intellectually, which contributes a lot to the dissonance.) Cass’ accidental therapy involves butterflies.

Tim continues to be around, a lot more than he has been for a while because he’s kind of obligated to see this through. The septuplets trust him, which is more than they do anybody else for a while, so he winds up with a lot of childcare duties.

Since this amounts to ‘showing them where to find soap’ and ‘being in their vicinity’ rather than i.e. brushing their teeth for them and making sure they don’t steal each others’ snacks, he’s fairly okay with this.

Sizdahum sticks especially close, which is fine because he’s not a big talker; he winds up getting a lot of absent lessons on detective work.

Tim gets yelled at for having murder scene photos open in front of him; both of them and Haftum, who happens to be there at the time, roll their eyes a lot throughout.

Tim’s friends also visit the Manor a few times specifically to visit the kids, since they already met them. At one point the Damian clones, Tim, Kon, Wonder Girl Cassie, and due to rumor mill Anita, Cissie, and Greta all have a picnic in a rare afternoon of sunshine on the Manor grounds.

Alfred packed the picnic so it has ludicrously expensive cheese, a fruit salad featuring freshly pitted cherries, and thermoses of milkshakes in the favorite flavors of everyone who got one, even the ones he’s never met before. In response to this bounty Anita threatens to come to visit every time she can get babysitters for her parents.

Then she considers introducing her parents to the clone kids. They’re turning out almost as weird, even if in theory they don’t remember their previous lives. We’ll see how that turns out.

Bruce got used to how all his sons’ friends know his secret identity over a decade ago, it’s…fine.

Steph thinks they’re creepy but she’s far enough from ground zero to laugh about it, especially about their occasional appearances as Tim’s row of ducklings, and also she trusts Cass’ judgment.

Everyone does, to a certain extent; it helps the septuplets’ cause incredibly over the course of the first few weeks. It wins Alfred off the fence about them after about three days, which is quite a coup; even before that he was fast catching up with Tim in the ‘learning the differences between the septuplets’ sweepstakes.

(Cass is the only one who can even semi-reliably tell them all apart if they’re not wearing their nametags, or catch them switching, but learning things like their individual preferences in weaponry or cake is arguably much more important.)

Speaking of names, it’s a difficult issue. Bruce would (with considerable angst and self-doubt) be willing to name them all if asked, and they’d probably be open to it if he offered, but they’re not quite comfortable naming themselves and he’s too insecure and weirded-out to suggest anything else.

The other members of the family are varying degrees of not okay with the numbering system. Steph’s main issue with it is she has trouble remembering them precisely, because she doesn’t speak Farsi and learning seven unfamiliar similar-sounding words at the same time doesn’t play to her strengths.

Damian has a tendency to call them by their numbers in English, which only some of the clones actually mind but it offends the hell out of Bruce.

The necessity of keeping them secret until they have actual public-ready names and a story has been settled on wears on everyone’s nerves a bit. The issue that there exists no story more believable than the actual extremely weird truth stands in the way.

Barbara actually crafts an entire cover about rescuing the products of an illegal cloning operation by people planning an overly complicated ransom scheme for Damian, and Bruce going ‘well dammit they’re my kids too,’ which doesn’t get deployed for a while because:

1) everyone’s still hunting for something a little less weird and

2) they have to review the entire body of legal precedent relating to clones to make sure this won’t put the kids in jeopardy down the line or undermine Bruce’s chances of getting custody somehow.

Meanwhile, Bruce absolutely forbids the clone squad from getting involved in vigilante fighting. Because they are six. They’re not quite on house arrest but they have strict supervision and a curfew. They mostly accept this; they’re used to discipline and they did come here for refuge.

He tries to take away all their live weapons. Because they are six. This fails to stick. It threatens to become a serious bone of contention.

Cass, Tim, and Damian (somewhat unwillingly) wind up having to broker the issue; explaining to Bruce that the kids think he suspects them of plotting murder, and to the kids that Bruce doesn’t think they can be trusted not to hurt themselves with sharp objects is. Fraught. On all sides.

Why does Bruce never get any kids for whom normal responsible parenting guidelines are fully applicable?

[aspiringauthorintraining]

Partners in Crime #3

After spending some needed girl time, the pair headed back to STAR Labs.

(Y/N) could hear Caitlin, in the passenger seat, talking on the phone in hushed whispers. She didn't think much of it, not wanting to be nosy. The whispering conversation continued, when the car pulled into the lab parking lot. She waited patiently, turning off the ignition, for her friend to finish the phone conversation.

Caitlin's face lit up all of a sudden. "Alright, I'll bring her in then." Hanging up, she turned to her friend with a big smile.

"What are you so happy about? You're starting to freak me out." (Y/N) leaned against the door, distancing herself from her creepily smiling friend.

"Well, Cisco just told me that our fifth team member is present in the lab, and to bring you in to meet him!"

"Why were you being so secretive on the phone, then?" she asked.

"You'll see when we get there!"

Caitlin managed to get out of the car in record time, flinging open the driver's door, grabbing (Y/N)'s hand, and dragging her into the lab.

"Cait, Caitlin, c-can we slow down a bit?" (Y/N) wheezed, out of breath. But she couldn't help but smile, seeing how giddy Caitlin was. She hadn't seen her friend this happy, since Ronnie died.

"There you guys are! What took you so long?" The resident tech-genius whined. "Was there a shoe sale on the way here that you had to stop by?" He was still munching a Twizzler when they entered the room.

"Hey! There's nothing wrong with wanting to drive safe. Slow and steady wins the race, or in this case, stay alive." (Y/N) thought of herself to have superb driving skills, especially better than Cisco, who thought the speed limit sign was more of a suggestion for drivers, and Caitlin, who drove extremely slow in case she accidentally hit a butterfly.

"And where is this important person I need to meet?" Frankly, she was a little annoyed at the mystery of the fifth person. It had been bugging her all day, and having impatience as a personality trait was not helping the situation. Who was this secretive person who she had practically had to set an appointment to meet?

"Well, the need to wait is no more. Here he is!" Cisco stepped to his right, wiggling his fingers at the ground behind him.. "TA-DA!"

"A dog?! We have a team mascot? Oh my goodness, he is so adorable!" She half-whispered, half-screamed because the little puppy was sleeping, adorably, on the floor. (Y/N) was literally jumping up and down, unable to contain her excitement on the news of the unmasked fifth member.

So worth the wait.

"Dang it, I thought you would be mad, or at least a little annoyed." Cisco was disappointed at her reaction, thinking she would be mad that the mysterious fifth person wasn't even a person. "I completely forgot that you loved dogs."

Caitlin rolled her eyes at his attempt to annoy (Y/N) and turned her attention to trying to calm down her best friend. "(Y/N). (Y/N). (Y/N)!!" Her attempts failed, however, as her friend now kneeled on the floor, cooing at the sleeping puppy. "(Y/N), can you listen to me for five seconds, please?"

(Y/N) stopped her fawning, and stared at her friend, who was cutting into her time of cooing at the puppy.

"Yes?"

"Cisco was just kidding. We actually have someone, a real person, we want you to meet, before you lose your mind again over the puppy." Caitlin gestured her hand over to the area behind (Y/N), where a figure dressed in, what appeared to be, scarlet red spandex stood.  

"That cannot be comfortable," she commented, under her breath.

She focused her attention on his face, which she couldn't see very clearly. Standing up, she brushed off her knees and walked over to the red figure with her hand extended out.

"Hello sir! I'm (Y/N)! Pleasure to meet you!"

Even as she got closer, she couldn't make out his face very well. It seemed as though it was vibrating or something. She rubbed her eyes, thinking her vision was messing with her.

The red figure took her hand, and shook it, but didn't do anything else. He just continued to look at her.

"Umm, this would be the part where you tell me your name?" Immediately, the handshaking stopped.

"Wait, (Y/N). You don't know who this?" Caitlin voiced from behind.

"Of course I know who this is. You're 'The Flash'! But I meant, what's your real name? You must have a real name right? Or am I supposed to guess? Is it Clark? Bruce? Bart? Wilson? Wait no, you don't really give off the vibe of a Wilson…" She continued rattling off names off, already lost in her own world.

Caitlin sighed, not liking to have to raise her voice. "(Y/N). (Y/N). (Y/N)!!"

"Bernie? Stewar-" She looked at her friends' faces. They didn't seem as excited as she was.

"What?"

"We can't really tell you his identity…"

"Yeah, Dr. Wells told us that we shouldn't, or can't, tell you for your safety."

She gave her friends an 'are you kidding me' look.

"Well, WE aren't allowed to tell you, but if you found out for yourself, we couldn't stop you," the voice behind the vibrating face reasoned. (Y/N) turned back to the source of the voice, the man in the spandex suit. She gave him the same look she gave her friends.

"For all I know, you could be the guy selling hot dogs on the street. How would I even find out? Actually, the better question is, why should I even try?"

"The answer is closer than you think," the superhero hinted.

"At least give me a better hint." She pleaded the Flash and her friends, with the best puppy dog eyes she could muster. But to her friends, it just looked like she was trying to imitate bug eyes, so it didn't help her cause.

"So until I find out who he really is, he has to walk around in that costume whenever I'm here?"

"Yup. And it's not a costume, it's a superhero suit. There's a difference," Cisco insisted.

"Well, I do love a man in uniform." she said jokingly. "I think I'll take my time on this case."

"It's true, she does." Caitlin laughed at her friend's antics.

The Flash, on the other hand, seemed flustered at her words, making him stutter. "I-uh-um. Well, nice meeting you Ms-"

"Call me (Y/N)."

"Right. Um, well, I'll be leaving now. Let me know if anything happens or if you need me."

With an awkward wave, the Flash sped out of the room, making any loose papers fly about in the air.

"You know, you guys should really buy some paperweights." (Y/N) suggested to her friends. "Where's he going by the way?"

"Probably off to another rendezvous with his crush." Cisco informed, with raising his eyebrows up and down, in a suggestive manner.

"Huh, interesting. I wonder who she is?"

"Cisco, don't you dare." Seeing him about to answer her question, Caitlin hurried to interrupt him.

"Any-who, back to the real important matter at hand." (Y/N) gestured to the puppy on the floor. "Who's puppy is she?" The puppy of the matter was still sleeping, not even bothered by the previous events in the room.

"It's yours actually."

"WHAT?!"

With that yell, the puppy woke up from it's nap and gave out a yawn, before running over to (Y/N) and pouncing near her feet. He took a second to sniff the new human, before reverting back to jumping up and down.

"What do you mean?" (Y/N) was on the verge of tears from the happiness, and sadness that this whole thing might be a dream. She pinched herself to check. "Ow.. Yup, definitely not a dream."

"We got you a puppy as a welcome gift! I know how much you've wanted one but couldn't when you were in Starling." Caitlin exclaimed.

Her previous land lord didn't allow her to keep dogs in her apartment because of his allergies, so she had to hold off on her dream of becoming a dog lady (similar idea to 'cat lady', but instead with dogs). Well, she wasn't serious on the dog lady thing, but was devastated upon finding out that she wouldn't be able to get a dog. But now, with her changed living spaces, she could.

"You guys, you are the best friends that anyone could ever have." Caitlin's eyes got teary at her words, and Cisco was already a sobbing mess. "What's his name?"

Wiping away her tears, Caitlin responded. "We were waiting for you to name him, since he's yours."

Laughing, (Y/N) looked at the dog closely, through her watering eyes. "Hmm. I think I'm going to call you Chewy. Short for Chewbaca the Third."

The dog barked at his name. "Good! I'm glad you like the name! You're gonna be our new mascot!" Smiling , she picked him up in her arms gently.

"Well, if he's our new mascot, you better be ready to bring him in to the lab everyday. He's as much part of the team as anyone of us." Cisco said.

"Of course! And I hereby decree, Cisco Ramon and Caitlin Snow, the godfather and godmother of my child Chewy. If anything were to happen to me, I entrust him in your care." (Y/N) announced dramatically, sniffling through her stuffed nose.

"And the moment's over." Caitlin sighed again at her overly dramatic best friend.

(A/N) I really want a dog. I really want a dog. I really want a dog. I think if I say this enough times, maybe one will appear.

[thelittleredheadedmusician]

To Roast or Not to Roast

It’s been a hot sec since I wrote a DC fic but I got an idea about the batkids being asked to participate in a schwanky roast of Bruce and it turned into this! Some light internal angst with a happy ending.  Gen Rating: PG Words: 1856 AO3

Dick frowned down at the invitation. The thick envelope made of paper that cost more than most kids in Gotham paid for their notebooks had fallen out of the pile of bills and magazines and postcards when he’d grabbed his mail. It was heavier than anything else in the stack with the cardstock it contained and slipped right out when he’d grabbed everything. He had carried it as though it were likely to explode at any moment or contained deadly poison or was a carrier of smallpox and living in Blüdhaven and having a return address of Gotham those weren’t wholly out of the realm of possibility.

When he’d finally reached his kitchen Dick dumped the rest on the counter and just held the cream envelope in his hands, studying it with narrowed eyed suspicion that only increased as he read and reread “Gotham City Chamber of Commerce” in the upper left corner.

Finally, Dick opened a drawer, pulling a steak knife from within it and tore through the top of the paper. He slipped the invitation out and carefully read the script.

You are cordially invited to a night honoring Gotham’s great businessman and philanthropist Bruce Wayne

The night will feature a four-course meal and conclude with a roast of our guest of honor.

Please RSVP with the card enclosed.

Dick felt his eyebrows raise as he read the invitation again. A roast. Bruce was getting a roast. Bruce agreed to a roast. Bruce agreed to a roast after Alfred pressuring him into it and making the Chamber of Commerce agree to donate a rather large sum of money was more likely. And running his own investigation to make sure he wouldn’t wind up literally on a spit Dick was sure.

He chuckled and shifted the cards to find the RSVP and hope they hadn’t skimped on return postage when he noticed something odd. There was another piece of paper, nicer still than anything he had in his printer but not the same thick cardstock of the invitation. He unfolded it curiously and frowned as he read.

Dear Mr. Grayson,

We hope that you are well and hope to see you in attendance. We are writing to ask if you might consider being one of our special guest speakers for the night. As Mr. Wayne’s eldest son we thought that you might bring a unique and entertaining perspective to the stage. We have also reached out to Mr. Drake-Wayne and Miss Cain-Wayne and greatly hope the three of you would consider speaking.

We await your reply on the matter.

The Gotham City Chamber of Commerce Lucy Plumber Events Chair

As he finished reading Dick let the paper fall onto the counter. He went to collapse on his couch, fishing his phone out of his pocket. They wanted him to speak at Bruce’s roast. They wanted him to roast Bruce. Not that he couldn’t, he did all the time it was quiet easy after all these years and well brooding in a dark cave while dressed as a bat kind of made you an easy target. The question was did he want to roast Bruce in front of these people?

It was one thing to tease Bruce and make fun of him when they were in their masks because that wasn’t Bruce, that was Batman. Batman deserved it more often than not and had bigger things to worry about than Nightwing making fun of him in front of a gang of would be arsonists. Batman was used to having his protegee complain about him with various members of the Justice League and Titans, most of them had just about as much right to complain.

It was another thing to tease Bruce to his friends and family. They got it. They either grew up with the guy too or had been sidekicks themselves. There was a something that came from growing up in the shadow of heroes and really only people who had done that understood it. So yeah, him and Babs or Tim or Cass ragging on Bruce in the cave was allowed. They’d earned that right. Bitching about him with Wally or Roy or even Jason and Steph – when they were on speaking terms – was allowed too.

Standing up in front of a room full of Gotham’s elite and making fun of the man that, to them, saved Dick? Yeah, no. Ok, yeah he did save Dick that was true but he didn’t need a bunch of rich snobs thinking he was some ungrateful circus brat, he’d dealt with enough of that those first couple years after high school thanks. Besides, they didn’t deserve to hear Dick’s jokes. Not the ones about Bruce. They wouldn’t understand. He didn’t want them to understand. Those were personal.

Besides, what was he going to say? “You know how you grow up and people tell you you’re ‘one of a kind!’ and all? Yeah, Bruce never said that and for proof please let me point to the three others who are apparently just like me and even with changes to the costume some still think we’re a singular person!” Or, “People always tell me ‘you’re so well adjusted!’ and yeah I am for a kid who watched their parents die. For a kid who was raised and trained to fight crime by a man in a Kevlar furry suit? Well the verdict’s still out.”

Dick could just say no, he wouldn’t do it. Hell, Dick should just say no. It just… He didn’t know. It bothered him. Everything about being asked bothered him.

He kept playing with his phone, spinning it around in his hand, as he thought when he finally remembered why he’d gotten it out in the first place. He checked the time as he unlocked it and yup, Tim should definitely be awake by now. He hit the call button, lifted it to his ear, and waited.

“Nnngh. Whu?” Tim’s voice was muffled when he picked up and maybe Dick underestimated how late the kid could sleep in on a weekend.

“Good afternoon Timbers,” he couldn’t keep the tease out of his voice, not that Dick tried.

“’M on the west coast. ‘S still mornin’,” he protested. Dick winced a bit, he hadn’t realized it was a Titans weekend so yeah maybe Tim got some slack.

“Sorry.”

“’S fine. What’s up?”

“Well I was going to ask you about something interesting I got in the mail-”

“If Steph sent you a live bat it you should blame Jason,” Tim interrupted quickly and Dick paused.

“Um. No. What?”

The younger boy sighed and Dick could just see him scrubbing his hand down his face before pushing it back up to push his long hair back. It was a movement he did often and one that often prompted a remark about haircuts from Alfred. “I dunno. Harper got her and Cass really into Les Mis and then she and Jason ran into each other on patrol the other night and he caught her belting out One Day More or something? I really don’t know. She was talking really fast, you know how Steph gets. Anyways, they started talking and Jason told her something about how Victor Hugo sent his fiancée a live bat in the mail and she thought it was hilarious and well we all remember what happened when she found those websites were you could send people glitter and gummy dicks and poop.”

Dick had to bite his lip to keep from laughing. He did remember that, vividly. Tim and Cass both had a fine coating of glitter over their apartments for weeks after that, though with all the pranks and Cass being Cass there was normally glitter coating their apartments. Dick had gotten the gummy dicks sent to him and work and truth be told they’d been pretty good. Bruce had received the elephant poop. At the office. And Tim had seen and told Kon who’d told Clark and then there was an article in The Daily Planet and Bruce had been forced to give an interview to a very amused Viki Vale about the whole thing when she made a very compelling argument about the failings of a Gotham paper not being able to report on Gotham news and the importance of the press and well there’s a reason she and Lois go toe-to-toe on scoops.

“There was no live animals, though that would have been preferable,” Dick admitted once he was sure he wouldn’t burst out laughing if he opened his mouth.

“What did you get then? A dead bat?”

Dick snorted. “No. At least not today. I got an invitation to a roast for Bruce. And to roast Bruce.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. Apparently, you did too.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t know how I feel about that.”

“Neither do I,” Dick admitted. “I don’t know what I’d say. I don’t know what I’d want to say.”

“You could say no,” Tim said levelly. “I haven’t even seen it yet but I’m probably going to. Too bad they can’t ask Jason since he’s legally dead and all, he’d love this. Or Barbara. Let her roast him, she’s good at that.”

Dick smiled and shook his head, imagining those two tag-teaming. It wasn’t hard, they did it on the comms some nights and it was some of the most vicious and scathing remarks he’d ever heard. Thankfully, it was rare they were levelled at him. There had been times though and those had been rough.

“I don’t think any of what they’d say is fit for the general public,” he said dryly.

Tim gave a noncommittal hum. “Steph and Harper. They’d just rip into him for being a rich white guy.”

Dick sat up straight. “That’s not a bad idea Tim.”

“What? Have Harper and Steph do it? Um, I still haven’t seen this thing but I’m fairly certain they asked us cause we’re his kids but not like an actual child like Damian.”

“No, I know exactly who it should be. Thanks. Have fun with your friends this weekend, I’ll come to the Manor for dinner sometime this week.”

“Um ok? Bye?”

“Bye!” Dick hung up with a smile.

He pushed himself up over the back of the couch and grabbed the letter off the counter. There was an office number under the signature and while there was a chance she wasn’t in today Dick figured that being Events Chair meant you worked weekends. Besides, it’s not like he couldn’t just leave a message.

She picked up on the second ring and Dick’s smile grew. “Hi Lucy,” he pushed as much charm as he could muster into his voice, “this is Dick Grayson. I just got your invitation to Bruce’s roast and while I’m honored that you invited me to speak I just don’t think I’m the right person for the job. However, I do think I could put you in contact with someone who is. Have you reached out to Bruce’s cousin? Kate Kane? She’s a delight and if her barbs at holidays are anything to go by I think she would be perfect.”