#Blackouts

[learning-to-fly-on-my-own]

Blackouts still happen though. That's a pretty significant thing that happens. Like, I get where you're coming from, but blackouts still very much happen.

people all collectively coming to tumblr to see if ao3 is down for other people too or if it’s just them and their wifi is so poetically nostalgic when you think about it, because in some way, it’s the equivalent of those times in the past when you’re a kid and visiting your grandparents’ home and there’s a blackout and so you just walk outside of the house to see if your neighbors experience the same thing too. the ao3 is just. like. a modern version of that

[theoddsideofme]

[honeyknome]

Letters from Vancouver

[verfound]

FIC: "A Port in the Storm" (MLB; Lukanette; LBSC Lukanette Month 2024)

@lovebugs-and-snakecharmers is doing a Lukanette Month for September 2024, and we all just kinda tossed some prompts in the disco to compile a list?  We ended up with 71 prompts, so I decided I’d roll some dice to pick a prompt, do a twenty minute (ish, bc we all know sometimes they run away from me) sprint, and try to get some short fics out this month?

Read on Ao3

08 September 2024

Prompt 03: Blackout

“Are you sure about this?” Luka asked as he followed Marinette up the stairs to her room.  She rolled her eyes as she opened the door and stepped aside, waiting for him to join her.

“Of course I’m sure,” she huffed.  “Besides, Maman and Papa already agreed.  It’s fine.”

“I’m sure Tom thought I’d be crashing on the couch when you asked,” he said, smiling slightly.  She scoffed as she shut the door behind her.

“The couch isn’t as comfy,” she said.  “I’m not having you wake up with a sore back when there’s plenty of room up here.  Besides, do you really think Juleka is sleeping on Rose’s couch?”

He paused as she took his pillow from him and tossed it up into her loft.  She turned back and smirked at him, an eyebrow lifting almost comically onto her forehead.  He shook his head, chuckling.

“…I wasn’t thinking about it at all until you said something,” he said.  He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her, smiling as his hands slipped into the pockets of her shorts.  “How would she put it?  Ew.  Gross.”

Marinette started giggling, and it would have been perfect if thunder hadn’t crashed outside the minute he started to lean down for a kiss.  She jumped closer, and he was just starting to think maybe it actually was perfect after all when another boom rattled the building.  The lights flickered, and then they were plunged into darkness.

“…and that is why I insisted you crash here,” she sighed, slumping against him.  “The news said this storm’s only going to get worse.  No way was I leaving you on the river, in the middle of cyclone by yourself.  I wasn’t about to let my boyfriend drown.”

“I’m pretty handy in the water,” he chuckled.  “I know how to swim.”

“Juleka’s staying at Rose’s.  Our mothers are out of town.  Papa is staying with Grandpa Roland while he recovers from his surgery.  I have more than enough room here, and it’s safer to wait out the storm here than it would be on the Liberty,” she said.  He tipped her chin up and pecked his lips against hers.

“She’s seaworthy,” he insisted.  “I would have been fine, but I do appreciate the offer.  This is much better than the freezing bowels of the ship.  Even if we don’t have lights.”

“Shut up,” she laughed.  She sighed and rested her head on his shoulder, her fingers tapping against his chest.  “Well, shoot.  There goes my plans for a movie night.  I wonder how long the power will be out for…I’m not even sleepy yet.”

“I brought my guitar,” he reminded her.  “I know you have candles – there’s no ban on open flames here.”

She snickered, and he smiled as he brushed his nose against her temple.

“We have camping lanterns, too,” she said.  He hummed.

“Candles are more romantic,” he said.  “We could head back downstairs.  Curl up on the couch.  I could sing you to sleep.”

“We could do that up here,” she said.  She stepped back and reached for his hands.  “You know my bed’s more comfortable than the couch.”

…he was pretty sure he wasn’t supposed to know that as well as he did.  At least not if Tom was asking.  But Tom was with Roland, and Marinette was looking up at him with dark eyes and perfectly kissable lips, and suddenly he wasn’t even sure he really wanted to bring his guitar up there, anyway.

He could think of a few better things he could be doing with his hands.

“Come on,” she said.  “I do have candles up there.  Sing me to sleep?  There’s nothing we can do about the power, anyway.”

Lightning flashed, illuminating her room – illuminating the warm smile on her lips, the one he was wanting to kiss away more and more with every passing moment.  He backed her up against the ladder, bending to do just that, and for a moment he was lost in a world that was nothing more than Marinette and soft and mine.  Her hands fisted in his hoodie, tugging him back towards her for a deeper kiss.  When she slipped up the ladder a moment later, he was quick to follow her.

She didn’t have to ask him twice.

[paracosmic-gt]

Our experience of blackouts

Being a dissociative system is living a life where if I stop concentrating for a moment I "wake up" 4 hours later realising the past is a dream and I haven't been there this whole time.

My mind knows what happened, the memories are recorded physically.

But for me, I just...stopped. Then started again. Like falling asleep, you never know the exact point when it happens, and then all of a sudden you're awake again. All these memories are supplied, but to me they are dreamy and foggy. Not really mine but handed to me like a strange gift.

This is regarding autopilot, not switching. When we switch we are actually more aware of time passing than auto, which causes a massive gap. We are consciously engaging, but the autopilot means no one is home.

It is not sentient more than an idle screensaver on a computer. Bouncing around until we move a cursor, and never quite hitting the corner. We are still logged in in some sense, not entirely in the headspace...just in a dark quiet place between.

- J

[smokefalls]

I remember it was autumn, and I remember feeling plagued by an unbearable need for both intimacy and estrangement, for the queerness of touch.

Justin Torres, Blackouts

[blacksapphicguide]

Jagged Mind (movie)

2024 movie. Psychological thriller. Drama.

Plot points:

Abusive relationships.

Haitian spirituality.

Voodoo-type magic.

Set in Little Haiti, Miami, USA.

Black-biracial writer (Kelley Kali).

Main black character.

Interracial sapphic couples (main).

Multiple queer characters and couples.

TW//: Suicide-murder associated body, stabbing, murder, dark magic.

Black characters:

Billie (Maisie Richardson Sellers) Rose (Shein Mompremier)

Connections:

Billie x Christine (interracial lesbian: black-biracial x middle eastern) x Alex (interracial lesbian: black-biracial x white) Rose x Alex (interracial sapphic: black x white)

Sex & Nudity - Mild

Homosexual (F) sex scenes.

Kissing, suggestion of oral sex present.

Characters engage in one-night stands.

Cheating is present.

Nudity without revealing private parts.

Violence & Gore - Moderate

People are injured and killed by stabbing and deep cuts.

Character's death is made to look like a suicide (slit wrists).

Character is put under a curse that impacts her brain, memory, and sense of time.

Character blacks out regularly and has flashbacks to incidents where she's injured.

Character talks about parental abuse as a child when she was punished if she didn't do things perfectly.

Profanity - Severe

Fuck, shit, goddamnit, whore, bitch, etc are consistently used.

Alcohol, Drugs & Smoking - Mild

Regular drinking

One woman believes she blacked out after drinking.

Frightening & Intense Scenes - Moderate

Discovery of a body (from suicide: slit wrists)

Stabbing

Verbal abuse

Character falls and gets a concussion in one scene

Abusive relationship dynamics

[cricketcat9]

Our rivers are drying,

so, very little hydropower. Tomorrow we'll have country-wide blackout from 10pm, to 6am Thursday, then a few more next week. Expats are freaking out about freezers, house alarms, cameras, candles, flashlights, UPS, water heaters etc., while 99% of them go to bed at 9pm every day anyway...

I survived total few days blackout in Toronto while living on 17th floor of an apartment building (no elevator, no water, etc.) I guess will survive this too

[multiplicity-positivity]

Dissociative Amnesia

Our thoughts and experiences, and some resources to learn more.

Hello everyone! We’ve gotten a few asks recently wondering about amnesia in dissociative disorders, so we’ve decided to put this post together. We will cover as much as we can about amnesia, and talk about our experience with it.

What is amnesia?

Amnesia is partial or total memory loss that is more severe than common, every day forgetfulness. People may experience amnesia for a wide variety of reasons, such as experiencing a head or brain injury, being inebriated, having an illness or disease that affects the mind, lack of sleep, and extreme stress/fatigue/brain fog. Amnesia (specifically dissociative amnesia) is a really big part of many dissociative disorders (with the exception being OSDD-1B). In dissociative disorders, alters may experience full amnesia (blackouts) or partial amnesia (greyouts).

What are blackouts?

A blackout is when a person or alter experiences a jump in time, or finds that they cannot recall key events from the past. Their memories may feel fragmented, incomplete, or literally “blacked out.” Coming back from a blackout can be overwhelming, scary, and disorienting.

For us, blackouts look like: seemingly “snapping awake” suddenly with no recollection of what we had been doing. Coming to in odd places, like the grocery store or the park or the library, with no idea how we got there or what led up to that point. Feeling like we are jumping forward in time (it’s Monday today, but I blinked and it’s Thursday now). Large gaps in memory, especially memories from our childhood. Fragments of memories may remain as factual information (EX: “I know we went to the store yesterday, but I don’t remember anything we bought or any of the details”), or there may be no lingering information at all (EX: “I can’t remember what happened yesterday and there’s food I didn’t buy in the fridge”)

What are greyouts?

A greyout is an experience of partial amnesia, and the term covers a broad range of experiences. It may mean that a particular aspect of a memory was forgotten, or that you feel emotionally, physically, or otherwise detached from a memory. The memory may exist, but it feels hazy or incomplete when you try to recall it.

For us, greyouts look like: feeling emotionally or physically detached from memories. Able to recall the past but it seems shaky, foggy, hazy or unclear. Retaining some details in memories but not others. Memories feel like a film, or like something that we heard about in a story, but not something that actually happened to us.

How can I tell the difference?

Telling the difference between blackouts and greyouts can be quite tricky! In general, for our system, if we’re able to recall events with some clarity, there isn’t any amnesia. If we can recall only pieces, or feel like the memory isn’t ours at all, it’s a greyout. If our mind is just blank regarding a certain memory, or we can only recall what others have told us, rather than the events themselves, it’s a blackout.

Can I experience amnesia without knowing it?

Yes, and we actually thought we had a pretty good memory before learning about our dissociative disorder and the amnesia that comes along with it! This is because our mind tends to fill in the gaps that it can’t explain or understand. These pseudomemories, or projections, led us to believe our memory was healthy and normal. We’ve since learned that many of the memories we took for granted were just projections from our brain trying to fill in gaps and help us function to the best of our ability. It’s something we had been oblivious to for decades, but at this point we are very aware of how unstable and unreliable our memory is. It is a part of having a dissociative disorder!

Can dissociative amnesia heal/Can my memory improve if I have amnesia?

We think so, yes! Our therapist has assured us that memory can be repaired and healed with treatment and time. Patience and self-compassion can both aid in this process! We ourselves are trying to heal, and our hope is that as our system becomes more integrated, we will be able to recall more memories and recover details as a result. It is a difficult process though, and one that we are actively pursuing through therapy! Some may be able to heal their dissociative amnesia without therapy, but for us, having outside help and a support team is essential to our healing journey.

Sources/Links to Learn More:

Please feel free to reach out to us if you have any further questions, or to share corrections or concerns! Thank you so much for reading, and have a great day!

(Image ID:) A pale orange userbox with a cluster of multicolored flowers for the userbox image. The border and text are both dark orange, and the text reads “all plurals can interact with this post!” (End ID.)

[elizabethminkel]

I was honored to be a Tournament of Books judge this year, and in the semi-finals, no less! I wound up with two formidable—and, perhaps by chance, thematically similar—books that were super interesting to read side by side. Since this is Tumblr, I will specifically say: if you're interested in queer literature and history and you haven't read Blackouts yet, put it on your list!! In my judgment I said it moved me, which is code for "made me cry repeatedly" (compliment).

[philgennuso]

Power Station #GraphicArts #Haiku/#Haibun

Power Station by Phil Gennuso Artss orange county powernight falling storms comingthis plant is ready *********************************** Where I live, in the Hudson Valley, there are still many powerlines that are above ground, strung across age old poles. As a result, when the inevitable storms come, there is a vulnerability which can lead to power outages. Fortunately where I am presently…

[lineageandtrajectory]

God this book is so fucking devastatingly beautiful.

[emmalovesdilemmas]

[news-buzz]

UK households urged to do one thing before Christmas or face power outages | UK | News News Buzz

Households across the UK are being urged to do one thing before Christmas or risk facing power cuts. Experts from a home assistance firm have said that the average household is set to spend a staggering £1,115 on smart home technology this Christmas, including smart phones, home assistants and smart speakers. But with snow, ice, wind and rain disruption sweeping the UK this winter, and surely…

[crazienerds]

Blackout Bliss

Unplanned power failures fuel unforgettable memories. As a child, unexpected power failures equated to fun. Those were the times when inverters and mobile phones didn’t find a place in every household. If power outages happened on a holiday, during the daytime, every child in the community would get out on the streets to play, away from the television, unmindful about the scorching heat.…