#Because I am nothing! Awesome

[idiopathicsmile]

i am absolutely not making a new years' resolution to lift weights more but at the same time i guess there is no harm in just periodically dipping in to check: have we as a society yet solved what is in my mind the greatest problem with strength training, which is that it is incredibly boring? like, i know it is good for you. my dad is essentially chris traeger from parks and rec; believe me, i am very aware it is good for you. but god does my entire consciousness rebel at the notion of spending an entire half an hour just counting sets or whatever, multiple times a week, for the rest of my life.

[gingermintpepper]

One of my biggest pet peeves is the assumption that something has to be sad for it to be tragic.

I've always been a big believer of the 'Apollo has an awful love life'/'Apollo is plain unlucky with love' line of thinking but it does bother me that the general reasoning for that statement is given to the concept of 'Apollo is somehow undesireable and thus rejected' (Cassandra/Daphne/Marpessa) or 'his lovers die young and thus their love is unfulfilled' (Cyparissus/Hyacinthus/Coronis). I personally think that's a very unfortunate way of looking at things - not only because it neglects the many perfectly cordial entanglements and affairs Apollo has had, both mortal and divine - but because it presents a very shallow interpretation of the concepts of love and loss and how loss affects people.

Apollo can still grieve lovers that have a long, healthy life. The inherent tragedy of an immortal who knows his lovers and children will die and cannot stop it does not stop being tragic simply because those lovers and children live long, fulfilled lives. The inherent tragedy of loss does not stop being tragic simply because someone knows better than to mourn something that was always going to end.

What is tragic is not that Apollo loves and loses but that loss itself follows him. Apollo does not love with the distance of an immortal, he does not have affairs and then leaves never to listen to their prayers again. He does not have offspring and then abandon them to their trials only to appear when it is time to lead them to their destinies. He raises his young, he protects the mothers of his children, he blesses the households that have his favour and multiplies their flocks that they may never go hungry. He educates his sons, he adorns his daughters and even in wrath he is quick to come to his senses and regret the punishments he doles out.

Apollo loves. And like mortals, there will always be some part of him that wishes to protect the objects of his affections. Apollo, however, is also an emissary of Fate. He knows that the fate of all mortal things is death. He knows that to love a mortal is to accept that eventually he will have to bury them. There is no illusion of forever, there is no fantasy where he fights against the nature of living things and shields his beloveds from death. Apollo loves and because of that love, he also accepts.

And that, while beautiful, is also tragic.

[hana-bobo-finch]

Mothiva’s got competition 🗣️🗣️

(was lookin through an app on me and my siblings’ old-ass ipad and decided to make one lmao)

[triglycercule]

eusgahhhhh goddddd the lazy urge to just beg the internet to mansplain killer's lore to me in baby talk so i can finally GET IT and then the other less appealing urge to actually do an analysis on him so i can form my own opinion and observations. fucj

[front-facing-pokemon]

[suniside-crossing]

.

[ghoatinaytherealone]

THE SILLIES

Lil pixel art thing for @farfetchedshow

[imminent-danger-came]

My new hobby is skimming through seasons of Ninj//ago to induce a fever dream like state in my psychese

[fallowtail]

isn’t it cool that my misery that my only purpose is to hype and support other people in their work and passions while not being capable of doing anything of my own backfired and now i can’t even successfully do that and i declined even further when it’s the only thing people have ever wanted out of me and the only way to actually be friends with people…like fuck man ok i guess

[wild-at-mind]

I feel like tags like these were inevitable on the post about people traumatising themselves for the greater good or w/e... There is SO much emphasis on posting on tumblr and other social media being so important and so useful and we must never stop. But I would like to counterargue with the idea that posting on social media (especially tumblr) constantly does very little/nothing. If that was true then the point here becomes meaningless.

[starlightswordfight]

maybe .. THIS time .... the content filters will work

[running-in-the-dark]

we managed to find a print shop that's open next week (and not like 30 minutes away), so I'm getting my thesis printed there on Wednesday as soon as they open, and then mailing it to my uni. hopefully it'll arrive the next day. I mean I'm sending the PDF file the same day, so... I don't know, I'm just hoping for the best

I had been talking to my brother P about it, and he told our mother. she messaged me to ask if I had found one that's open yesterday, and I wanted to wait to reply until the answer was yes (because she gets very annoying)

annnd she did get annoying anyway. she went to the print shop in her village (which we had already talked to), and convinced them to do it despite the fact that they're gonna be closed. which. I guess is nice of her? it could be? if the circumstances were different.

my brother told me, so I called her and she explained that she was sooo worried that she couldn't sleep all night and then she just had to go and ask them! she thought that since I hadn't replied, that meant I had just given up (I mean, I did have a mini breakdown and gave up for a few hours... but she doesn't know that.)

cool! so why not just call me (instead of messaging) and ask if I'd like her to do that? it's the fact that she keeps treating me like a child, but only in ways that feel really belittling and shitty. taking control when that's not what I want or need at all. there's no support, she just takes over and expects me to be grateful.

like, she makes me feel so fucking anxious about the whole damn thing. it's MY thesis. if anything she should be supportive and like, tell me I can do it and that it'll work out or something, no? but every time I see her she just keeps making it worse and worse, making me feel like I'm incapable of doing anything, and also if I don't get my degree my life will basically be over!

that's just sooo motivating, thanks a lot 🙃

[womb-complex]

me rn

[normalcannibalism]

i feel weird and self conscious about my art again. sigh

the entire post ended up in thw tags ohb my god

[girlcockholmes]

now that my PI is like hey you should actually be sitting in the lab to write instead of doing it at home im shooting one million lasers at his head in my mind. fuck off

[transgaysex]

theres birthdays in my family today you know what that means ☺️