#Be nice to me about the quality 3< /div>
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do you know t#e definition
#vast error#vasterror#murrit turkin#ve#art#drawing#digital art#eyestrain#eyestrain tw#I burned my hand yesterday#Be nice to me about the quality </3
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Time and Time Again comes back tonight!
Thank you all for being so patient with me, I know it was a long hiatus.
My health was struggling, my arm was (is) hurting, and I decided it wasn't worth it. I'd rather be slow!
So thank you for giving me that grace, and I hope you'll be there with me for the rest of the series.
#like straight up. it's not worth it. idc how many people get mad at me#i would rather work fuckin. anything else than maintain this impossible schedule and keep hurting myself#if thats what it takes to do comics full time. then i can't do comics full time. simple as that!#i hope that for my next work i can have a healthier schedule and still make this work as my job#but if not. I'm never going back#i can't do it. 3 more years at this pace will take my ability to draw#anyways. its really good!!!#like genuinely i can feel a marked improvement in my skills#which is WILD!!! And I'm extremely happy about that!!!#just one more step into being better built to give people the quality stories they deserve.#ive not properly had the fire under my ass to finish stuff up but. its fine.#like i said? not worth it.#if i have to pause again then ill pause again. like i literally simply can not my body can't handle it#so. hopefully stuff goes smoothly but whatever happens will happen#whatever will be will be#i keep getting distracted lmfao#im excited about it coming back#and also. will. probably be distracting myself...#other creators dont read their comments. I'm like straight up not capable of that LMAOOO#i check for comments like all the time#love seeing em. love reading people's thoughts about my work#it makes me a better writer and keeps me connected to what matters most. which is my audience!#so i dont regret doing that but also. jts extremely distracting#i get straight up nothing done on big update days#cause im in the comments absolutely massive eyed refreshing.#this sounds obsessive. and it is. no jk#its just fun and keeps me in touch w peoples perception which helps me learn to write better#plus people are nice and ask me questions that i wanna answer#or if someone is being an ass. then i wanna tell them to leave (cause i cant block people) cause i consider it my responsibility#time and time again
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BUNGO STRAY DOGS ANIME GUIDEBOOKS
#Idk just wanted to put them all together. I was like “now that the fifth guidebook is out it would be nice to see them all together!#shouldn't take more than ten minutes” *cue to me taking two hours to find all the pictures in the best quality*#It's just that book 2 and 3 backcovers turned out to be so hard to find for some reason. Book 3 is straight up a photo I edited lmao#Anyways can we talk about book 4 the exclusively sskk one please <3#That's one of my favourite sskk illustrations ever it's just. So sskk. And I like the style a lot for that specific one#atsushi nakajima#osamu dazai#ryūnosuke akutagawa#sskk#shin soukoku#chūya nakahara#skk#soukoku#kyōka izumi#fyodor dostoevsky#tatsuhiko shibusawa#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bsd dead apple#mine#bsd official art
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you will hear my strong opinions about the care and keeping of fish today by the lord
#pig originals#i hate it when incredibly small tanks are advertised as being for goldfish or betta fish or something#especially goldfish because goldfish can get SO big SO fast!!! and you have to house them correctly llease#if you put that critter in a 3 gallon so help me god im killing you evil style.#THE DECORATIONS TOO. why is the gravel on the bottom always some eye watering color do you Think your betta wants to live at chuck e cheese?#where are the plants i have honestly seen some horrifically decorated tanks like put some fucking plants in there !!!#not just spongebons house i get that the little plasticine houses are cute but the fish will Not hide in those. or like those.#you Have to add something nice for them you Have to give them plants you Have to let them hide in places#like so many people genuinely dgaf about the fishs quality of life at the fuck all theyll put down some rocks and a single structure#NO!!!!!!!!!! NO ILL KILL YOU just because fish are small and cannot speak does NOT mean they dont deserve a good life
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quizmas…a little treat…gift to everyone and me……
dividers r by @/animatedglittergraphics-n-more!!! theyre so cool!!!!!
merry christmas!!! i hope your extra holly and jolly!!!! and I hope the big red guy gives you awesome presents!!
#tumblr likes to take a FAT dookie on the quality#<- click the image 4 better quality!!!#keiko should’ve beat yusuke ass i love yusuke he’s a great character but i feel like especially at the epilogue keiko should’ve got what#she wanted..she literally YELLED that she was done waiting 3 years for yusuke and that it was time for her to get what she wanted for once#and she should’ve but apparently togashi was like “nuh uh uh girl”#she was put through hell and back (everyone was)#she should be at a nice beach building sandcastles and having fun#she literally RAN into a building that was on fire to save yusuke’s ass she was HAULING his life on her back she was CARRYING him the first#season and then she’s told to wait 3 more years for him to finally do smth in the makai you could tell she was getting sick of him#yusuke should get his ass beat EVEN MORE with what he pulled with kuwabara in chapter black like dude what the heck. Shizuru even said#“my brother…his heart is breaking…” OKAAAYYY YUSUKE OKAY YUSUKE MEET ME AFTER SCHOOL MEET ME AFTER SCHOOL 🥊🥊#kurama is secretly a little poop stainer i call it i know he would NOT shut up about kuwabara just to make yusuke flip his lid.#i know kurama secretly likes to gloat and he would do it non-stop with yusuke#ok time 4 tags srry this is rlly long i just think keiko is so cool and she should’ve got better than what she was given#yu yu hakusho#yyh#yyh kurama#yyh kuwabara#yyh yusuke#keiko yukimura#yusuke urameshi#kuwama#short comic#fan comic#kazuma kuwabara
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genuinely i think (one of) the biggest problems about the finale of fopanw is that nobody is willing to understand what dev is going through or gives him sympathy, and any sympathy that IS shown or anytime their thoughts are challenged, its undercut with jokes constantly. its so frustrating having the adults around him constantly being like yep you suck and if youre good its buried way deep i guess <3 as if he isnt like, a 10 year old being influence by an adult that is a criminal
its just so weird tonally because its like they want you to sympathize with dev and are absolutely aware hes a sad case, but still make jokes and put so much blame fully on him for his behavior as if every adult around him didnt fail him, INCLUDING peri
#also dont take this super seriously i dont hate this show in fact one of my fave eps was the time loop episode it was so good#this isnt even touching the surface regarding my thoughts but. yeah#and before peri defenders try to kill me i dont hate him i like him as a concept#but we can all agree he did a shit job right#and to give him credit dev is a hard kid and a hard first job at that but#half of the time he was hangin around his parents and constantly being shown love and affection and kinda just not talking to dev really#and the other half he complained about everything goin on as if he didnt have training for being a godparent?#but im sorry that comes with the job like more often than not#the kids are traumatized or goin through it theyre not going to just be nice lil guys#theyre like 10 usually. cmon#anyway yeah the finale was disappointing alas#i hope s2 has the same quality as the rest of the eps but esp the time loop episode <3#animation chitchat
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thinking about fallout 4 against my will
#random thoughts#fallout#unfortunately nora compels me#the fact the 'hi honey!' tape specifically mentions her 'shaking the dust off' her law degree is interesting#like she gave up her job to stay at home with her husband and kid. why?#like that's a whole year. at LEAST.#love the idea of nate pressuring her into it <3 maternity leave turns into 'isnt it so nice being with sean around the clock?'#'too bad you won't have this quality time when you return to work'#turns into 'you can always return to work if you feel like it but we DO have a lot saved up . . .'#and it's like. okay so fallout 4 would be so much better if it were set in the 1960s. literally no reason it shouldnt be#yknow beyond complying with lore which. it isnt that faithful to in the first place#i just think it's weird the game is like 'here's the FUTURE' and then it's like 'here's the FUTURE FUTURE'#anyway make it the 1960s. give me time-appropriate fucked up family dynamics#and nora's a laywer and a feminist who promised herself she'd never compromise her career for a man#and nate seemed so NICE and like he understood until uh oh. frog in a slow cooker#and he makes everything seem like it's her idea until she's barefoot in the kitchen with a screaming baby on her hip and burnt food in a pan#and she doesn't even realize she's trapped until it's too late. isolated from friends and family#idk ill do more research later to make it more time-accurate (ESPECIALLY interested in second-wave feminism)#anyway i think she cheats. with a door-to-door salesman selling places in the bomb shelters#(honestly probably the only adult social interaction she's had in weeks beyond her husband)#i like to think at some point she had a bit of a car accident due to the stress so nate took her keys#probably just a minor fender bender he blew out of proportion but she believes it because oh god what if she hurt sean#her feelings toward sean are complicated. i dont think she quite loves him which she feels guilty about so she overcompensates#with trying to keep him as safe as possible and she feels like he KNOWS and HATES her#(honestly when the bombs drop everything happens so quickly and when she's in the future and registers sean's gone she feels. so relieved)#(followed by heavy shame)#nate sabotaged her birth control btw. love evil 1960s patriarchs#never outright stated but heavily implied!#anyway nora in the future (while she felt very progressive for her time) feels very out of place#like her ideals have no place. like she has no place
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colouring before & after ! (thank u for tagging me @jeonwon-wonwoo & @raplinenthusiasts & @baekhyunnybyun <3 )
show your coloring (either masked or side-by-side) and tag other ccs to do it too! (cw flashing gifs under the cut)
tagging (i'm sorry i don't know who has and hasn't done this already so please ignore if u have!!!) : @irlvernon @hoshingi @jeonsupershy @blonde-riwoo @chwedout @fairyhaos & truly, genuinely every other cc friend who hasn't done this yet but wants to!!! my brain is small but my love for u is huge so pls do this and tag me so i can see yours too.<3
#tag games!#on gifmaking#tw flashing#flashing gif#*mine#my gif#idk i've been in sch a gif slump lately and feeling like the quality of my stuff has taken a nose dive so this was a nice little ego boost#in a way??? but mostly just. revalidation.#granted only like 2 of these are........ super recent#we aren't gonna talk about it#anyway <3#thank u for thinking of me i love u ;-;
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🌸 is so immensely likeable.... do you ever just like someone so much all the time
#they have such good qualities#theyre so thoughtful and nice and fun to talk to#yesterday they received and looked at an email about the *PATHOGEN EXPOSURE INCIDENT* that happened to them last week#while i was talking to them about somethign truly inane and silly basically just for the recreational love of talking to 🌸#and i was like 'oh sorry' and let them read for a second and then they looked back up and we continued talking#i immediately forgot it happened#and then about ten minutes later after id left the room they came to find me#and held my hands and said so so seriously#''im so sorry i read my email instead of listening to you. it was so rude of me. i'm sorry i did that to you. i hope you're not too hurt''#--you know. that they read the email about the BIOSAFETY LEVEL 3 PATHOGEN CONTAINMENT FAILURE#while i was in the middle of discussing my conflicted feelings about rigid heddle looms for the third time.#i eventually managed to explain that this was an extraordinarily sweet and outrageously unnecessary apology about an incident i could not#have been less bothered by#like i. i do think you should read the email about changes to BL3 PATHOGEN CONTAINMENT actually#but. you know. the cutest and most thoughtful person on earth will sometimes do such charming things as this.#[to be clear theyre basically 100% definitely fine re: the pathogen]#box opener#girlfriend tag#even now i am still charmed and perplexed by this. what a perfectly enchanting creature
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So Allegedly Infinite Wealth is 100 hours... not that you can't already spend that long on the games if you really want to, but I'd say it's the first time that could be said to be the base experience rather than a time only hardcore completionists are likely to get.
Yokoyama was talking at length about wanting to make the game worth the price tag since the team is incredibly conscious about the value of the players' time and money. They essentially feel they owe players ten times what they paid, so they're aiming for "an enjoyable 100 hours, but also an unforgettable 100 hours."
If they pull it off, I personally think it'd be 100% worth it and not just a "well other studios are doing it so we can get away with it too" price hike... I'm at least happy to know that's not the intent, and I'm intrigued to see how everything pans out and what the ratio is between story and side content
oh yayaya i saw that article this morning!!! 100 hours is actually so unfathomable to me in terms of an rgg game- i mean y7 was At Minimum around 45~50 hours but when i think of other RPGS that easily dip into 70's and 100's of hours, i'm not too surprised to see LAD start to climb towards those numbers now. it'd be such a jump in rgg's terms tho, so i'm TRULY curious to see where the nearly doubled gameplay hours comes from..
i really appreciate yoko's respect not just to RGGS but also to its customers: they want to make a great product, but they also don't want to sacrifice what they want to do to do that in the process
#snap chats#very timely article since .. i think it was passport i dont exactly remember who it was that was concerned about the game quality#maybe it was kana... idk one of you lot LMAO POINT IS thank you for reading our minds yoko#i wouldnt mind 100+ hours of island content LMAO but fr im truly curious to see what the main plot's gon be bout then#i mean we KNOW the main plot but yk what i mean... how the hell does this pan out..#REGARDLESS. i never had any issue with the LAD8 price#maybe its just cause i dont buy videogames too much <- liar (theyre old so like .2% cheaper its ok i think)#in rgg's case i always know im gonna get something i'll love for months- even years at this point#either way its nice knowing that yoko's at least aware of people who aren't happy with the price#and even besides that still just want to make a worthy game#aint nothin wrong with knowin your worth.. i think.#talking about videogame prices in general honestly im p sure the avg price for a game should be in the 100's by now#going off inflation anyway#so the fact devs are still trying to keep it under the $100 is. Something to me anyway#the quality of games- in terms of graphics anyway- has really gone up. idk if that warrants a FAT slap of an expense in the end#but it's not hard for me to understand the crawl towards it right#but now im ramblngi LMAOOOOOO anyways#haruka did nothing wrong yoko said it himself <3
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fun to be excited about mundane things such as having a tattoo artist
#i have two tats but theyre both small and were very simple designs that were just walk-in#i decided on a half sleeve design and found a shop in town#that flew under the radar before#but its like it jumped out at me this time#and i looked at their art and was like yes this is exactly the style and level of quality i want#and went to a consult and got amazing vibes from the artist and his wife and the shop#and he was very excited about my idea and is working up some options right now#im so excited to have some custom made art on my body#and excited to get a Big tattoo#it will be a newish experience#my other tats both took about an hour or less#he estimated depending on how much detail i wanted to pay for this could be 3 hours or 7 hours lmao#anyway im excited#nice to have something to look forward to#personal
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:/
#A good episode. Nice animation. It's suuuuuuch a shame things had to go downhilla right for episode 3 like... That's such an awful timing#And I'm like very evry positive I'm not making stuff up. I will let drawings quality slide since that's a matter of personal taste#But the animation is infinitely more static in ep3.#There's endless shots (that literally span for minutes. I know I've counted) where nothing happens. It's so hhhhhhhhhhhh#(Btw for anyone who forgot / wasn't there at the time: the first 3 season 5 episodes had to be ready earlier for an early screening.#That's why they had to rush to make them and the quality suffered for it in the last episode in particular.)#Sorry for being redoundant but you know how it is. I'm ss/kk-manifesto. I'll be complaining about s5ep3 till the end of Tumblr#Back to the real ep1 in question... It was so nice!!!#I take issues with the amv opening because seriously. Don't release a season if you're not ready to release a season. No one will get mad#But other than that the animation and drawings were very nice. This arc makes me a little emotional.#It's funny how you can see the anime editing staff gradually get really into chromatic aberration lol.#Like it's always been present as far as I can remember–#but it went from season 1 being used very sporadically to s5ep1 being used in every single shot lol.#It's okay tho it's not bothersome the slightest. It gives some kinf of depth to the shot I suppose.#Even funnier that Harukawa has been using it a lot in their last colour illustrations as well ahah.#Last chapter it was very noticeable both in the chapter cover and color page#Mmmmhhhh...#When Atsushi says ���I know where Kamui-san is! He's in the middle of an assassination!”; isn't that a kind of plot hole?#I don't think in reality Fukuchi was killing anyone at all at that point.#And even if Ranpo says otherwise‚ looking back we can be fairly certain that Fukuchi never plotted to seriously assassinate the ada#Idk ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#There's some little lines from the manga I was missing this episode. The “I hate dealing with this decay member the most”.#The “Great! Anything you want! Just say ‘I want this case solved’ and I'll step right up and—”.#I know it's really nothing at all / perfectly understandable cuts...#But at the same time they really add to the overall pacing and make the story flow much more enjoyable for me (≧▽≦)#random rambles
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My comic is so pretty...
The hiatus is letting me take a little extra time on these episodes, and I'm definitely putting it to good use!!!
#almost done with my 8th episode... which will give me. two weeks. of buffer...#id really like at LEAST a month... but to be more comfortable id like two#which means 2-6 more episodes before I come back!#I've got about 7 weeks so its possible. but i do still have to finish book 4#so much to do ..........#I decided for my next comic im doing 3 updates a month.#having 10 days instead of 7 to make an episode is such a huge huge huge difference...#difference in quality and in my health!#anyways the comic is really pretty im really happy with the work im doing rn#the environments especially. im getting to spend a nice amount of time on them and theyre turning out so nicely#its nice to be able to write with a lot of different environments and not have to redo panels when I get to them cause of time#cause every time theres a wild angle? you need a new background...#so sometimes. often actually. there just isnt the time to make the backgrounds for those and i have to make them more flat...#which is fine. it doesnt really affect anything narratively. but. idk. it's kinda sad right?#anyways yeah! 10 days will be much better.#36 episodes a year is about what ive been uploading with my hiatuses on the weekly schedule anyways!#so might as well cut out that super stressful middleman and just commit to that#52 a year is just such a huge difference and i have to accept its not possible to me#i will hurt myself trying to do that. and i want to make comics my whole life!#so i cant push myself that hard now and sacrifice my future. we're gonna go slower after this...#anyways yeah cant wait to come back but also time. if I could get an extra week like a secret one just for me#where theres no chores no nothin just me and my work#thatd be great! so go ahead and do what you gotta do to give me a little pocket dimension#me: ugh i want to return right now...#the more logical me: NO we need the time to finish everything!!!!!! NOT right now!!!!#time and time again#ttawebcomic#comic panels#hiatus stuff#adam and steve
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just saw that there's a monster in the hull update and realized i'd missed three of those........this + the audio are such treats giggling and kicking my feet about it fr. going to leave a comment on the fic itself but in the meantime needed to drop a letter on here to say i love the way you write billie--her loneliness, her thoughtfulness, distrust of yet attraction to emily and everything she represents........not to mention the way she's haunted by daud, the longing for a life she can't fathom and will never have !!! society if everyone gave billie the complexity she deserves. and your banter and prose are stunning as always lord everything abt this fic is so good. bringing wine to you on the deck to drink together about it in spirit and yes pun intended
🙏😭 thank you so so much I don't know what to say! that's amazingly kind of you ♥ its a genuine pleasure to like. double down on themes and nuance and less popular characters and just like. idk. trustfall into the fandom that there's people with taste like you, and you can invite them onto your metaphorical deck for wine and meaningful looks 🍷♥♥♥
re: billie - no one else in the dh universe comes close to whatever she has going on
hiding my thoughts about writing dh2 billie >
there's so much material to her!
i thought i'd never write for dishonored 2 (not derogatory - its my favourite game). its undoubtedly linear & doesn't have the mystery or grit of dh1 IMO.
but i saw lapin post that billie & emily comic, and i saw a few other people i respect mention billie/emily and it had me rotating them until the abjection/emily-monster thing clicked and then it was downhill from there
but there's more to think about - what billie has been doing with herself, how she feels about daud & the whalers at this point in her life, her relationship with sokolov (god.a separate rant), her history in karnaca & dunwall, emily's place in the empire and how that fits into billie's story, her lifelong revenge arc, and comparisons between jessamine & deirdre.
like. when you consider billie's perspective you realise how fucking badass she is for going back to dunwall. she not only did it scared she did it scared for her life. suicidal level flimsy disguise trapped in a tin can with your enemy. etc
PLEASE tell me if you ever decide to post that daud & billie fic you mentioned a while back :O
#asks#corpseprince my beloved <333#thinkin bout your one-day fic. daud and billie are SO difficult to write#not simply father daughter but like. the suicide pact vibes they have and the all consuming nature of dauds bonds#and there's a strong running tension between them#not to mention neither being the type for feelings#the more 'dishonored fandom friendly' fics im working on i've deprioritised recently#yuri on the way <3 there was a deficit anyway!#mostly excited for brigmore smut#if i may bitch on your lovely post (sorry). if you cbf with that stop reading here#idk. it keeps happening#so i post a chapter. maybe get 2 kudos that week#which is nice and i smile every time im stoked to see readers around#but then one or two days later some unpleasant fucko on tumblr has taken one of the ideas i put in the new chapter of my fic#and turned that into a low quality textpost like it was their idea. it gets a heap of notes#and its always a *highly specific* idea after i posted it. and i know what the fandom is talking about broadly so it sticks out#i dont mind at all when its like mutuals or people who have commented or talked to me then its more like 🤝#like. someone who doesnt appear to have ever interacted with me or the fic#im not trying to flatter myself by saying theres no chance its a coincidence. but its offputting as hell#backhanded signal of success? bestie thats my meta post but you made it worse <3#so my focus rn is niche-r stuff for smart cool people with taste#THE RAMBLING. *tops up your wineglass if you made it this far*
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i saw this tweet and have not known peace since (fits the early game stuff better but ykwim)
#squirrel plays bg3#baldur's gate 3#astarion#oc: iona raedir#side note; i think i like this as his endgame outfit the most#i've experimented with quite a lot of different outfits and have liked a lot of them#but cool as the fancy coat with the gold embroidery is; i think this is more the vibe i'm personally going for for the very end#it's simple and comfortable#but with some nice decorative stitching and a cut to accentuate his shoulders? i like it#it's subtle; well-made; and even kind of elegant without being garish#plus we nicked it from the Jannath estate so you know it's Quality#i like to think that he probably went through a few phases pretty rapidly throughout the story#experimented with whatever struck his fancy; and in the end; just landed on this sort of “it's my day off from serving cunt” look#this “i don't need to dress to impress; i already impress those whose opinion i care about just fine”#idk it just makes me happy
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sometimes i think about my spn oc and how i rewrote everything about amara to interact with the story i was trying to tell about her. there were some really neat ideas in that i need to recycle for something one day. like, in the show proper, they just let amara take over a human baby and that’s fine, but amara’s not Meant To Be Here. this entire universe is one constructed in her absence. saying she can possess a human body should be like saying if you took a person and sent them to a universe where 1+1=3, they could just figure out how to function within that.
which in story took the form of Amara being something that could not be Understood, only Rationalized. a force locked outside the narrative who could only get inside and destroy things if given a role within it. by the Winchesters as A Monster To Face. by Chuck as Wayward, Unreachable Sister. and by miss oc as. simultaneously a projected creature to be saved, an amalgamation of injustices done to herself (and others) that would never be righted but could be made up for by being a part of this. and as something impossibly powerful that could be both protection and purpose.
and the Darkness wasn’t any of those things, really, but to have agency in her own story required new shackles, but ones she was always straining against. she wouldn’t fit inside the confines of a human mind, let alone a body, at least not well enough to leave it Intact. like lucifer burning through nick, but Worse. because the burns were an expected outcome of skin not strong enough to hold him. humans were built for angels, some were built better and some worse, but they’re meant to work. putting amara in human skin should disconnect the skin and mind and soul from the reality her brother built itself, i think. slowly. bit by bit.
and at the same time, i’d gone and written the kind of wild scenario you really can only write for your thirteen year old mary sue, given that spn oc the part of herald/high priestess/failed vessel. which she pursued with wild abandon like that would fix anything wrong with her <3
in the end, running alongside the borrowed family theming of the original show was my own theme of “how much self-annihilation will you accept to make your point. are you accepting it, really. or are you seeking it.” not just physically, in letting something unmake the base components of what you are as it tries to fit inside you or in it constricting and suffocating itself beyond self-recognition to get inside in the first place, but, obviously, it’s supernatural, how much selfhood do you cede to your family. is it worth it.
it was interesting, if nothing else. let thirteen year old me cook. she had ideas.
#spn oc#don’t mind this i’m rambling about nothing i felt nostalgic about her (<- my oc)#there was also an explanation in the mix for why amara was called amara in this au too despite. you know. not being a baby.#and it was like. a vessel’s desperate attempt to separate itself from the thing inside it by naming it something other than itself.#like a last moment of self-preservation. the opposite of lucifer using nick’s face and us all agreeing to think of it as his. you know?#and amara means beauty.#it’s a very human need. to name things. and the thing is that humanity itself is antithetical to what amara is. in this au.#not because of any inherent quality of it. but because it was not made with her in mind.#i keep bringing up lucifer but he’s such a good comparison case of what thirteen year old me was trying to construct here#and what i can better explain now that im. not thirteen. but its that. lucifer has beef with humans because they have common ground.#the only reason he can hate them is because they’re recognizable to him. terrible little cockroaches. but something he understands.#amara as i conceived of her could not hate or love or understand humanity. or the world. or anything as we know it. because it was not made#to be seen by her. it was made with the express purpose of her never encountering it.#when i was thirteen i wanted her to be so much more alien than she was. unfortunately this is supernatural and supernatural deals in#Just Some Guy forever and ever <3#but it was my story so i made her fucked up and weird and beyond comprehension.#except. of course. when forced to bend into a shape that makes her Not her.#i don’t think proper envesseling would have been a process either her or the oc survived. not because they’d die but because they’d get.#stuck? i think? that was what the intent was. that they’d get melted together like plastic toys.#chuck had a nice smooth envesseling in this au because these toys are made for him.#and angels need consent and angels get bleedover from their vessels because the toys are shared with them but they’re closer to being toys#themselves too.#i’ve rambled enough honestly no one cares about this but me aksjfkjfks#what was i talking about. right! the naming!#the naming of amara is a nail in her coffin because she is named and it is so human to be named and to be perceived and to be shaped by that#perception. even without malicious intent. even to be looked at as destruction itself and be named beauty.#in the same way you kill what something could be by learning what it is. the way a unicorn dies when you discover how rhinos were drawn.#does that make sense? that’s what kills her. bit by bit.
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