#BF Homes federation

[carlocarrasco]

What to watch on YouTube right now – Part 36

Welcome back, my readers, YouTube viewers and all others who followed this series of articles focused on YouTube videos worth watching. Have you been searching for something fun or interesting to watch on YouTube? Do you feel bored right now and you crave for something to see on the world’s most popular online video destination? I recommend you check out the following topics and the related…

[investingdrone]

Understanding New Loan Disclaimers In The United States 2024

Have you ever dreamed of a new car, a comfortable home renovation, or finally tackling a mountain of student loans? Borrowing money can be a great way to achieve your goals, but it’s important to understand what you’re really getting into. That’s where loan disclaimers come in – they’re like a little map hidden in a treasure chest, guiding you to understand the true cost and terms of your…

[whovianwatchingstartrek]

A Whovian Watches Star Trek for the First Time: Part 104 - Battle of Pahvo

Star Trek: Discovery - Season 1 Episode 9 - Into the Forest I Go

We pick up exactly where we we left off. Command is recalling Discovery back to Federation controlled Space, and abandon the Pavhan's defence. Lorca however, disagrees, and has a clever plan to take down the Ship of the Dead. Trouble is, we only have 3 hours to figure out how to defeat the cloaking device, because that is the time that Command expects Discovery to Warp to safety by.

To create a paper trail about why Discovery is travelling by warp and not by spore drive, however, Lorca orders Paul to have every medical test done, which will inevitably reveal to his Doctor BF about the genetic nature of his connection to the spore drive.

The actual plan is simple, however it requires Discovery to make hundreds of consecutive spore jumps to 3d image the ship but would almost certainly fry Paul's brain. We're then given the idea that the Mycelium network can extend beyond just the galaxy into the rest of the universe and even into parallel realities, and this really motives the scientist inside Paul, seems to be hinting that this the direction we're going in once this war arc is done and dusted.

In recent years has kinda become saturated with multiverses, but it's an idea that I love. If we do end up going in that direction, I hope it's handled well. Doctor Who has kinda dabbled in parallel universes before, Most Notibly Inferno and the overarching story of Series 2 of the Revived Series, and has kinda set my taste for how I like Parralel World storylines. Point is, if we do go in that direction, I hope Star Trek handles it's multiverse more akin to how Doctor Who does, and less like how Comic Book movies handle their multiverses. Basically, I want it to use a multiverse to tell interesting stories with the characters we have, I don't want it to become cameo-city

Paul get's into position to make the jumps, the Ship of the dead uncloaks. Ash and Michael beam aboard and the battle begins.

While aboard, Michael finds Admiral Cornwell and Ash starts having PTSD flashbacks after encountering the Klingon Torturer. Since The Admiral is unable to walk, and the Ash is out of commission, Michael is alone in placing he sensors. Luckily she successfully does it, and Discovery does it's jumps. As predicted, the Ship of the Dead goes back into cloak, but Discovery completed it's scans and now can bypass the cloaking!

The scenes with the doctor watching Paul suffering to make all those jumps was heartbreaking, and the episode had be at least convinced that Paul would die in the process. I also loved Michael's confrontation with Commander Kol, over his lack of honour, and her reclaiming Captain Georgiou's rank badge, which allowed her to kind of redeem herself in her own head.

With Kol defeated, and the Klingon Ship of the Dead destroyed, and command decides to decorate Lorca with something, presumably a medal, called the Legion of Honour, however Lorca decides to pass that honour onto Paul, which I'm really happy to see. This man deserves everything for going through that drive. However, Paul decides that the jump home will be the last jump and he'll reture to earth afterwards, which makes me wonder who'll take that spot going forward.

We get an interesting scene where Ash opens up about what happened while he was in klingon prison, and his survivors guilt and how that affected him. My heart goes out for the guy. But we also get the revelation that the Torturer made him some kind of sleeper agent or something, and that programming is starting to awake.

We're then left with the Cliffhanger of something going very wrong during that jump. The Bridge is in chaos, and no one knows where they are.

This was a very nice conclusion to the whole Klingon War arc, and I'm excited to see where we're going next. Whatever is happening with Paul, and Ash, as well as where the ship ended up jumping to. I'm a bit worried about the multiverse direction the first half of the episode hinted at, but we'll see where this goes

[st0rmyskies]

OH STORMY what if can i write. Colin visiting Twi at the townhouse, cause he still loves his big bro even if the Parents got Difficult. He sees Champion and is like “is your bf okay he’s acting completely different than last time (Wild)

and Twi has to like. Not Tell Colin that the bf got switched back to old life in a car accident which reawakened Champion like a sleeper cell of car gymnastics. And forgot they were boyfriends for A Few Months but it’s fine now. Cause not only How do you Explain that, but also it’s now federally protected info…..and also that his boyfriend is federally protected info. 

Or are you okay with fics of Colin visiting the Townhouse (rest his soul when he walks in)

Anon, I want you to do whatever your little heart desires. I am literally okay with whatever whoever wants to write about the HSH AU. Maybe I should tell you a bit about Colin before your endeavor, though.

Colin is Twilight's younger brother by 7 years or so, putting him at 15-ish years of age at the time of The Brave. He's the quieter, smaller, more reserved brother who is shy around strangers and used to hide behind Twilight's leg as a kid. Where Twilight is always doing hard work around the farm when he's home, Colin's health (asthma and other chronic illnesses) prevents him from doing a whole lot of outdoor labor.

Colin ADORES his big brother Twi, and the feeling is mutual. Twilight only barely restrains himself from lifting Colin up every time he sees him, because he will forever be strong enough and Colin will forever be small enough to do so, but he supposes Colin's a bit old for that. Colin kind of misses it, honestly.

Colin isn't allowed to have a cell phone yet. When he is, though, he and Twi will probably be texting every day.

If Colin is aware that Champion is/was Twi's "boyfriend," it's not because Twilight's said so. Their parents absolutely would not be aware of this, either. But Colin can see how happy Twi was around Wild and put two-and-two together. For him to come out and suggest Twilight has a boyfriend, though, would be really weird for Twi.

Speaking of their parents, a bit of secondary tension in your story could be from the fact that they would never allow Colin to visit Twilight at their uncle's house, much less stay there. So how did Colin get there in the first place? I doubt their parents know he's there. Does Twilight realize his parents feel that way about Colin visiting? (I have suggestions, but I'm interested to see what you come up with.)

Wind knows Colin, of course, and they have an amicable relationship. Wind is an ass to everyone but Colin, because Twilight has never been anything but nice to Aryll.

Colin will absolutely be taken aback by the entire dysfunctional household. Sky and Hyrule would seem normal to him, Four normal-but-not-quite, Legend would be terrifying to him, Warriors would be overwhelming but when isn't he.

And Colin doesn't have the same relationship with Time that Twilight does, either. Time stopped coming to family functions before Colin was even born, so all he knows about his uncle is the negative things his parents have said. He's personally baffled at why Twilight would want to live with Time in the first place, and I imagine he'd be very quiet around Time. Can't imagine Time is going to feel good about that.

[ms-boogie-man]

Oh boy! Here is a good one yo! I will unpack this item by item… and… debunk as I go

There is not any restoring RvW. There should never have been a RVW. RvW was a federal decision, it was never passed into any sort of law at the federal level. That said, abortion is a state issue. Norma McCorvey (Jane Roe) was paid by the Democrat party to lie at the hearings that led to the RvW decision. She admitted this willingly. Her lies made the case. At the time and up until less than a decade ago, Democrats promised all up and down the imaginary aisle that abortion would be careful and rare. They have done nothing of the sort. Democrats have turned what was once only allowable in the 1st trimester into a baby can be murdered on the birthing table at 9 months old simply because his or her mommy said so. Hundreds of thousands of abortions happen every year… not because it is the right thing to do, but because millions of women have been brainwashed to believe murdering their unborn is a right of theirs; and that abortion should be as easy as a Taco Bell drive-thru. *Abortion is the murder of an independent life. Full stop. This is scientifically proven and indisputable. Murder — of the innocent and defenseless — in our republic is unconstitutional. Now, would you still like to roll this issue back to the fed?? I thought not yo. Take what you got and run home

We the People do not live in a democracy. We the People live in a republic, a constitutional republic. Our republic needs protection from the globalist, tyrannical, oppressive Democrats. Dems are the only current threat to any measure of democracy in America

The healthcare industry needs to be reigned in. Not by government, but by real journalists outing the truth about big pharma and the medical professionals colluding with BF. The cures for diseases and ailments need to be exposed, and We the People need to push back. I am open to very limited conservative governing involvement in this, but I would really like for We the People to regulate this healthcare shit show… and rest assured, the Democrats are part of the corruption here

Paul Ryan is a GOP shill for the Democrats. He was a rebranded Dem doing their dirty work so Dems could always blame Republicans for the Social Security and Medicare fiasco. Here is SS and Medicare explained: you pass legislation — without We the People's knowledge or permission — to deduct money from lower and middle class incomes, put it in a make-believe fund that the people can tap into later, then you launder all the money back to yourselves and say that SS and Medicare are not working out so well. Too, print and print more money so you can pay the pittance that does actually get doled out to recipients *When you are a Democrat politician, if you run across a Republican who will not shill for you, bribe, coerce, or take them aside and put them in a compromising position with a child or prostitute. Uncooperative Republican problem solved yo

The students who need debt relief were grifted by Obama and his banker friends into taking out exorbitant loans for degrees that do not/can not earn… and in some cases, all that debt did not even culminate in a degree. Fuck them. FAAFO

Voting is a responsibility. Period dot, the end. If you are an American citizen, 18 or older, with not any criminal record, it is your responsibility to amble on down to one of the polling stations located in every neighborhood and do your duty. No expansion of any rights needed here. *fully prepped for any moron who wants to bring up illegal migrants voting in American elections. American citizen, 18+, no criminality.

The minimum wage is over inflated as it is, and is one of the main drivers for the high cost of living across America. The correct way to generate more money is to make yourself and what you have to offer more valuable… not by passing legislation to force people to pay $25 ph for a service that is not worth $25 ph. *that is fucking retarded and just like a Democrat

All gun laws are an infringement. What part of … shall not be infringed did you not understand? And since all gun violence in this country is the work of liberal policies and tactics, I would say you have been fooled into disarming yourself for someone who is planning on doing to you that which you would shoot them for, and now you cannot. *I am fully prepared to slay in debate over this topic, so bring it, and careful as you go

There is no climate change *fully prepped to slay in debate over this as well

The only taxes the Democrats ever levy is on the middle and lower classes. *again, fully prepped to go toe to toe on this issue as well

This last one is moronic. Everyone in America — 18 or older — has reproductive freedom. If you want to have babies and make a family, then make them. If you do not wish to make a family, do not have sex, or use protection or some method of not achieving pregnancy. See?!… reproductive freedom yo. No defense needed. *and if laws in your state are going against this, vote to change those laws… but abortion is still murder of an independent, defenseless little human being. And of course there are the 3: rape/incest, major birth defects in the baby, major danger to the mother. End of list… and provide proof; we are talking murder here

Extra Credit: I am going to start arming the unborn. The Glock 39 … I believe it is offered in 9mm. If not, I am sure the little totts are cool with .40 cal yo

Block me, prove me right yo

Angie/Maddie🦇❥✝︎🇺🇸

Here is What Democrats Are Fighting For

Vote Blue, Vote Democrat! 💙🇺🇲

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[theorist-influencer-untitled]

1.27.24 Saturday

6:47 am

Going home in the Bus.... Whew! Somehow brain shaking coz the situational issues are becoming over-lapping coz at first I had doubt on Ley and Pres B if they will teach me the real answer on the new situation that I'm handling. It took all my soul energy... Yam and Prexel are rest day today...

The Tax Account is not easy angels... The confusion begins on Tax Pro and refund transfer and the payment of service and the extracting of money....The questions are upside down as well as the answers...

The client asked about why I can't pay the service I got from H&R Block using my federal refund, I can't pay the efile service. If the client has a Tax Pro Review he needs to pay that out of his pocket. The client can't use his refund or can't do refund transfer since he got a Tax Pro Review. The client asked to remove it but there is no guarantee that the client can do a refund transfer coz there are qualifications to follow.

But this is still a big question mark to me? If the client doesn't have Tax Pro Review meaning the client didn't do her/ his efiling and review. This question is weird!

Well, probably the refund must get first by the client then add again the Tax Pro Review.

8:09 am

Home now... Still, moving after 1 hour and 20 minutes... My last shift later night at 9pm... Whew!

9:27 am

Done,cleaning and cooking rice...The rest it is up to them.... I need to do beauty sleep....

This Uncle Jun wants to bring John outside, I told him no... I want a respect on me angels... I bought John his stuff and I took care and still taking care of John since he was 3 months and until now that he is 8 years old.

I don't want John to go out without me...Uncle Jun is still the same, not respecting me angels.

Uncle Jun sometimes is not matured, way back he brought John outside, John got sick or will have a sprain on his legs...

When it comes to George Eusebio and his son Uno, they were lifted up by Uncle Jun. On me very plastics... They wanted me to be their supporters. It is their circle,their own group linking with Betsilogz ( my biological mother ). I feel envious coz they are so famous and high since 2007 or for 17 years here in Cavite. They gave a green car on Uno the son of George and adoptive son of Uncle Jun.

Uncle Jun wanted me to pay our electric... WHAT AM I HERE?? But on Uno they gave him a green car. My salary is not that big angels...

3:14 pm

I still have windblow....

This is for Daddy... Whoah! Missing in action, lemme find my Daddy-Bf...

3:28 pm

This is for you Daddy-Bf, Why??? you are so missing in action??? LOVE YOU DOWN,DADDY...

3:39 pm

My fake biological mother is here now in our house... I just don't trust her...

I need to keep a job and wanna leave Cavite...

This Uncle Jun put the collar of John on the least hole, meaning it is too tight on him possibly will be choked... Hmmm... I told Uncle Jun not to fasten John's collar on its least hole coz it is too tight...

He said I will kill your dog angels please kill Uncle Jun if that is his main agenda...

8:09 pm

Here in Conduent... I still have windblow... Done,watching "60 minutes"...

I'm still thinking of money and need a job or career path... I have windblow for 17 years... I have so many frustrations in life... I tried combing but I couldn't see it...

Still, not contented but thankful...

I wonder where is Daddy-Bf???

[kellstreasures]

Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: Vintage Guillow Messerschmitt BF-109 Authentic Scale Flying Model Kit.

[citadelsanchez]

~ Rick Fic Masterlist ~

(All of these are about C-137 unless otherwise stated, but feel free to imagine them as any version of your favorite Rick!)

One shots:

Drunk Nothings - in which Rick confesses feelings but denies them later (female reader)

A Date? - in which Rick takes reader to dinner as a date but refuses to admit it (gn reader)

Parallel Past - (TW:SA) in which Rick hears the young version of reader crying in her bed from a nightmare, and she reveals that she’d been sa’d. He comforts her & tracks down her abuser (female reader)

Hugging Rick - in which Rick surprises the reader with a sweet action (gn reader)

Kind Rick - in which the reader is slowly getting used to Rick's progress... but should they be? (gn reader)

Detecting Rick - in which Rick deals with Beth's best friend, who just happens to be a private detective (female reader)

Memory Rick - in which Rick is jealous of the reader and Memory Rick (gn reader)

Missing Rick- in which the reader desperately misses Rick who's on a long mission and he surprises her by showing up (female reader)

Scaring Rick- in which the reader taunts their bf Rick into playing Outlast to test his fear level. He retaliates in a seggsy manner at the end. (gn reader)

Showering with Rick- in which the reader is scared to shower alone and Rick helps (female reader)

Calming Rick - in which Rick soothes a quick tempered reader after a long day (female reader, but could technically be gn)

Plush Rick - in which the reader is obsessed with cute plushes and your s/o Rick pokes fun about it (gn reader)

Forgetting Rick - in which Rick takes reader and Morty on an adventure with a secret plan & makes mistake of leaving the reader alone (gn reader)

Jail Break Rick- in which the reader and Rick get frisky after he finally escaped the Galactic Federation & came home (NSFW!! female reader)

A comforting Rick - in which the reader is sad after their childhood dog passes and Rick helps out (gn reader)

Supportive Rick - in which Rick's lesbian granddaughter comes out to him (female reader)

Headcanons:

Alcoholism - in which the reader has substance abuse problems like Rick

Stories:

A Portal in Time - Avery is a cynical, volatile 25 year old college dropout just trudging through life. She's given up on the idea of love and spends her days working at a Home Depot and inventing projects when she can.

Rick is a 55 year old genius, arguably crowned the smartest in the universe. He spends his time going through portals to different dimensions with his grandson, and roaming the usual Earth when he's not. He too, has long since forgotten the thought of love and writes it off as artificial and unrealistic.

Rise above and focus on science... right?

Or perhaps they both find what they thought was undiscoverable.

[stonechild]

x

[mothmans-cumrag]

Rewatching Amok Time be like

finally. the episode where Spock and Kirk fuck in front of a bunch of vulcans. I remember how uncomfortable my dad looked when we watched it and also how I didn’t really get it because I was eight and the german dub sucked.

awww and it starts with Bones worrying about Spock 😍😍😍 i forgot about everything but the obvious part of the episode

ok poor Christine she didn’t deserve this

ooohhh new intro, now it’s sung and DeForest is also starring <3 as he should (although why didn’t they put the entire cast of the senior crew there?)

whyyyy are you hiding something behind your back, babe

omg the puppy eyes with which Jim tells Spock that they won’t have time to stop by Vulcan after all killed me 🥺

the stance of Jim asking Spock to come with him into the turbolift is the stance of a parent scolding their child

“you’re sick, babe, go to sick bay”

hah that rhymed I am a musical genius

“yield to the logic of the situation” is such a powerful statement actually

“as tight lipped as an aldeberan shellmouth” I love these little space sayings cause it means that there is a human out there who’s job it was to invent species and connect attributes to them to create sayings that make it sound like the federation has been out there so long they started picking them up and using them as well and I think that is beautiful

“biology as in... reproduction” translates to “you’re telling me you’re just horny? in heat? fuck or die disease?” god how did my dad watch this with me when I was a kid?

it’s Checkov’s first episode and he and Sulu are getting whiplash from all the back and forth 😂😂 what a great introduction of his new home, and yes it’s totally normal for Spock to try to kidnap the ship, Jim to bend the rules to save him and Bones just being done with and shouting at both of them

tbh whenever someone interrupts me while I’m trying to practice an intstrument I too have the instinct to just destroy my computer

“your face is wet” that is. the most non-soothing crap you could’ve said, Spock

soup.

“you’ve been most patient with my kinds of madness” gay.

ahhhhhh he’s asking his boyfriends for emotional support I can’t guys I’m dying aaaaaaaahhhhh

“she is lovely, Mr. Spock. Who is she?” Nyota has a cruuuush

tfw your bf is not only married, but also really famous

awwww he vouches for his boyfriends 😍

these bells are REALLY starting to get on my nerves

PLOT TWIST

“in this climate?” will be my new “in this economy?”

i really don’t like all that talk about the possession of women

you know they could have mentioned it’s a life or death combat earlier

the T in James T Kirk stands for “tiddies out tuesday”

why. does jim. breathe. like that.

this is so sexual i can’t. I just can’t.

smart move, having them beam up off-screen to save a few bucks

“I shall do neither” just killed me dead

I live for the happiness in Spock’s eyes as he sees Jim again

sending Christine out to be alone, uhhuh, so what’re you planning to do now that you’re together again 😏😏

ahhhh i love it. very good. wouldn’t recommend showing to your EIGHT YEAR OLD CHILDREN tho!

[uglysockperson]

I know I’ve already submitted a prompt recently (and I love what you created ❤️), but I am so taken with grown-up garashir baby and his boyfriend and wonder if you’ve envisioned him bringing bf home for the first time to meet his dads.

Hehehehe i sure have. I will do more art for them I’m sure but this is what ive got so far. Ive named garashir baby keer i forgot if there was a list fo bajoran/cardassian names I’m over looking but basically i called him yogurt right? Anyway, they meet threw shared friends on a beach day or what you can call a beach day on the cardassian planet but keer decides hes not in the mood to dry up his scales or burn his nose and bf flirts his way into spending a lovely sun filled day together and after that they start going out, eating street food, going to book stores,dancing but something hes forgetting...... oh right his TWO adoring fathers who dont know she’s dating someone. Keer mentions it over tea and julian flips, starts pacing in the study rambling about how old keer is getting and how hes getting old and keeps gonna get married. Elim uses his very special dad voiced and tells keer they should BOTH be here for dinner tonight.

Bf is a little nervous hes heard fun stories from keer about them but knows from shared friends that julian is a very famous human doctor and garaks a mysterious member of the cardassian high council. And bf being an ex federation brat trying to go to med school these possible connections had him sweating threw every robe. But when they arrive at the garashir house bf is so taken with the land scape work and welcoming energy the night goes pretty smooth, elim approves of the robes hes chosen and while subtly trying to pull as much information out of bf without him noticing he actually thinks hes a fine young man. Julian was hardly worried but was surprised to see a human boy but gushed about keer with him anyway and when he found out bf was ex federation and trying to get into school his lil heart burst and told bf alllll about programs hes setting up for cardassian hospitals and how hes definitely gonna be on the list for candidates. Bf sees where keer gets all his traits from, garak and hes strategic questions and how he dresses and holds himself to julians eagerness to be of help and his scattered story telling. Got him thinking about how keer would do meeting his mom. Makes him all warm and fuzzy.

[carlocarrasco]

Antonio P. Antonio remembered by many on 10th death anniversary

Over a decade has passed since the life of Antonio P. Antonio (also referred to as Tonton and APA) came to an end which impacted the lives of the surviving members of his family as well as the BF Homes community where he once served as the federation president. For the newcomers reading this, Antonio died tragically on September 11, 2013 after he got shot several times by a family member at…

[billionairebabes]

I need advice on how to start over. I really don't have anything right now. No friends, I'm in a bad relationship ( but if I break up with him then I will literally have no help) and I'm just stuck. I don't know what to do. Any advice would be helpful. I love your blog and thank you for taking time to read this😊

Hi babe, thank you, and sorry to hear about your predicament. I’ve never been in a situation like this and I’m unsure about a lot of details regarding your circumstance but here’s what I would do. 

1. Go home to my family. Living at home with parents can suck but I’d prefer that over a shit bf any day (if your family isn’t overwhelmingly toxic). I’m assuming you live with him? 

2. Go back to school if you aren’t already there. School is expensive but education is always a good step in the direction of independence. Honestly, if you have to, go to a community college and take out federal loans. Try to avoid private ones. 

3. Find a job that I could sustain myself on. In the age of COVID, there are plenty of wfh jobs available and some don’t require a degree. If you have a degree, that’s a plus. If you have a laptop, get on youtube and learn some basic excel skills. Do free trials on sites like skillshare. Do a free trial of LinkedIn premium and I think you’ll have access to LinkedIn Learning. Treat it like a class, get a notebook(s) and take notes. Be consistent. 

4. Cut him off. If it’s a bad relationship, it has to be negatively affecting your mental health. It’s difficult to start over when your mind is not in the right place. Take time to rediscover yourself, your personal interests, and long term professional interests. 

5. Avoid tying yourself to other men in this way in the future and start making friends again. New men that come into your life should only be supplemental to what you already have going on. You’ll meet new friends in your classes or any clubs at school. You may even befriend some of your coworkers. Reconnect with old friends if you can. You’ll need this support system. I’ve also heard of people actually making friends on Bumble BFF. 

6. I’d do confidence work and hella self-reflection. After one of my breakups in college, my confidence was shot and I didn’t even realize it until I started analyzing my post-breakup actions. You need to fully understand that you do not need that man (or any man) and you are fully capable of accomplishing your goals on your own. You also need to build yourself up so that you don’t find yourself in patterns that landed you here in the first place. 

7. How exactly is he helping you? If he’s giving you cash, start saving it so you can get away from him. If you don’t already have a separate bank account, I’d advise you get one. 

Wishing you the best of luck girl! I know this journey won’t be easy but it’s not impossible either! 

[jmeelee]

Except at Waffle House

A Sterek AU inspired by that ridiculous Reddit post about the girl who’s BF keeps fighting the cook at Waffle House.

As far as boyfriend’s went, Braeden hit the jackpot when she met Derek Hale. She hadn’t been looking for a partner when she’d stepped into the first class of her Master’s program, but there he’d been, sitting dead-center of the third row in the cavernous lecture hall.  Derek was… different.  Intelligent, well-read, handsome, driven; he’d weathered tragedy and trauma with elegance, emerging on the other side with a soft-spoken grace.  He made Braeden laugh with a wit so dry it kindled a fire in her belly.  To other women, Derek’s obscene good looks—chiseled jawline, soft hair the color of midnight, ass you could bounce quarters off of—might have been his biggest draw, but for Braeden, it was Derek’s hard-won composure.  When she decided to drop out of the Federal Marshall program and pursue her own independent career, Derek never batted an eye.  When she came home from dangerous missions sporting cuts, scrapes and bruises, he didn’t rage over her playing fast and loose with her own welfare.  He simply said, “I’m glad you’re home safe.”  Derek never yelled, never lost his temper, never fought.  He was a dream come true.

Except at Waffle House.

Truth be told, Braeden didn’t love Waffle House, but food was food and a girl’s gotta eat. Derek, however, had some deep-seated appreciation of the greasy chain that stretched back into his childhood, before his parents and older sister died. So while she preferred to eat elsewhere, Braeden found herself at Waffle House a few times a week, feeding Derek’s desire to reconnect with fond adolescent memories.

“Service might be a bit slower today,” said their usual waitress, who’s bright yellow name tag read Erica.  She plopped an iced-tea in front of Braeden, and a steaming cup of black coffee before Derek.  Erica snapped her bubblegum, pulled a tiny notepad from the pocket of her black apron, and snatched a stubby pencil out of her perky blonde ponytail.  “Boyd’s training a new cook.  What’re y’all having?”

Sure enough Boyd, the owner of the franchise, stood at the grill, patiently pointing at burners and griddles while the long-fingered hands of the tall, thin guy next to him flew around like drunk hummingbirds.  Braeden figured the new cook was replacing Scott, who had quit the line to attend Veterinary school.  When you spent several days a week eating there, the Waffle House family became your family.

Braeden was known to make her way through the various menu items.  Some people had their tried and true staples, but she preferred to throw tradition to the wind. One day it was pecan waffles, the next, chili smothered hash browns.  Today, a cheese steak omelet.  Derek however was a creature of habit.  “I’ll have the--”

“Steak and eggs,” Erica interrupted, graphite scratching over the paper.  “Steak medium-rare and egg yolks slightly runny.  Whole wheat toast, well done.”

“You got it,” Derek said agreeably, handing over his flimsy laminated menu.  “Thanks, Erica.”

They filled the void between placing their order and receiving their food with anecdotes from work and a fast and furious game of hangman on the back of their paper placemats.  Waffle House may be lacking in sophistication, but it’s service was always speedy.        

“Here ya go.” Erica plunked plates in front of them and topped off Derek’s coffee.  “Let me know if you need anything else.” But the call bell rang in the kitchen and she bustled away, already half-way down the aisle.

Three forkfuls of cheesy goodness passed her lips before Braeden realized Derek was poking at yellow lumps on his platter with a stiff triangle of toast, watching the yolks crumble like a house of sand.  She finished chewing, swallowed.  “Derek?  Is something wrong?”

“It’s my eggs,” he lamented.  “They’re super hard.  Not runny at all.”

Had she known the repercussions of her next words, Braeden might have given them more thought.  But unbeknownst to her, she was about to score red on the Waffle House Index of how prepared she was to weather the coming shit storm.   

“Just call Erica back,” Braeden suggested, waving her fork in the air.  “The kitchen can whip up another batch. No big deal.”  

Famous last words.  

Erica flounced over, ponytail swinging behind her.  “Sorry about that, honey,” she chirped.  “The new cook is still finding his groove.  I’ll be right back with the correct order.”

Derek thanked her again but watched with hazel eagle eyes as she brought the plate back to the open kitchen, speaking to the mole-speckled guy at the grill whose bed head hair was barely contained under his dorky paper hat.  Derek squirmed in his seat.

Braeden’s eyebrows furrowed.  “That’s a really complex call-in system these employees need to learn.  And all that crazy code with the jelly and mayo packets?  They’re bound to make mistakes sometimes.”

Derek grunted, watching Erica return with a heaping plate of eggs.  This time they were scrambled.  “These are scrambled,” he said stupidly, blinking at the fluffy little clouds.

Looking down, Erica seemed to see them for the first time.  She rolled her eyes and groaned.  “Ugh.  Stiles.”

“Yeah, it’s a style of eggs, just not the one I ordered.”

“No,” Erica shook her head.  “S-T-I-L-E-S.  Stiles is our new cook.  I promise I’ll be back with the correct eggs in a few.”

But ten minutes later a plate of thinly sliced hard-boiled eggs laid out in a flower pattern was placed in front of Derek.  Braeden couldn’t help it, she threw back her head and laughed.  “At this point, I think the cook’s fucking with you,” she told him.

But Derek wasn’t in on the joke.  He pushed the plate away and threw money down on the table.  “Hopefully both his cooking and his comedy routine improves,” Derek grumbled, pulling on his leather jacket.

Maybe now they could finally eat at some different restaurants.

----------

Three days later, they were back at Waffle House.

“There are over 1,500 other Waffle Houses in America,” Braeden said for the millionth time, waving her map app in Derek’s face.  “Look, there’s one twelve miles away.”

“It’s the principle of the thing,” Derek scowled, sending his second plate of eggs back to the kitchen.  First, they were poached, then they were part of a bacon egg and cheese sandwich.

The third time a single slice of toast sat on a wide white plate, a perfect circle cut from the center.  Inside the circle was an egg.  Cooked over-hard.  

Braeden took a fortifying breath of humid maple-scented air.

“Okay I’ve had enough,” Derek yelled, standing up from the booth.  “You,” he pointed at Stiles the cook, who stared back with a wide insolent mouth and tricky amber eyes.  “Take this garbage back and cook my eggs the right way.” 

Stiles slowly pulled a dirty apron over his neck, dislodging his ridiculous hat, and sauntered around the counter on long legs to stand in front of Derek, crowding into his personal space.  Toe to toe, there was barely any difference in height between the two men, though their body types varied greatly.  Derek was built like a brick shithouse, Stiles like a twink.  

“Is there a problem, dude?” Stiles asked coolly, with the poker face of an Easter Island head. The only crack in his stone facade was the tiny quirk at the edge of his pert lips.    

“Yeah,” Derek growled, pushing a finger into Stiles’ thin chest, “my problem is you and your shitty egg cooking skills.”

“Shitty?” The quirk blossomed into a fully grown smirk.  “I’ve made you several plates of superb eggs, dude.  It’s not my fault you won’t even try them.”

“Quit calling me dude.”

“Sure thing, buddy.” Stiles winked and stared Derek down like a cowboy in a duel with nothing left to live for.  Where had Boyd found this sadist cook?

“My name is Derek. Not buddy. Not dude.  Derek.” The words leaked out between Derek’s clenched teeth. Braeden could slice American cheese off his jaw right now.

Stiles smiled like he’d won the lottery, angling his body slightly away from Derek, but never breaking eye contact.  “Hey Waffle House, Derek here thinks my eggs suck.  Do all of you fine, upstanding people think my eggs are good?”  Stiles got several thumbs-up, two enthusiastic whistles, and one wrinkled middle finger from a white-haired man hunched over at the service counter.  Stiles gave the guy a thumbs up. “Thanks for your honesty mister.  It’s much appreciated.”

“What the hell was that?  What are you trying to do?” Derek was snarling, and the look between both men was lethal. Eyes sparked.  Lips wetted.  Fingers twitched. Braeden held her breath, sure fists would start flying at any second.  Derek made muted sounds of rage worthy of an aspiring ventriloquist. They were too close, puffed out chests a hair's-breadth apart. 

Stiles shrugged.  “My Waffle House, my rules.  Rule number one, pull that stick out of your ass, Derek.”

Derek took Stiles by the surprisingly broad shoulders and backed him into the coat rack.  “Next time I’m here, you’re gonna make me my food the way I order it.”

As quick as it started, the altercation was over.  Derek backed out of the overcoats, and Stiles came stumbling after like two teenagers emerging from a closet after seven minutes in heaven.  Derek made a beeline for the exit.

“Oh yeah?” Stiles yelled at Derek’s retreating back.  “I'll show you sunny side up!”

The whole thing was made even more ridiculous by the merrily tinkling overhead bell as Derek slammed outside.

_______

“Feeling up for trying Schwarma tonight?” Braeden asked when they pulled into the lot and parked next to Stiles’ run down blue Jeep.

“Not a chance,” Derek replied, practically backflipping out of the Camaro.

----------

“Derek, NO!” she said.

DEREK, YES he heard, and Derek, her Derek, the pinnacle of poise, yeeted himself over the counter, grabbing the yellow crossover uniform tie around Stiles’ neck.

----------

“At least Stiles didn’t spike Derek’s drink with meth,” Erica shrugged.  Today the two men were rolling around on the greasy tile floor.  

“Are you being ironic?” Braeden asked, taken aback by the seriousness of Erica’s tone.

“Waffle House is an irony-free zone,” Boyd informed her with a straight face. “I’m just thankful there’s no AR-15s or nudity today.”

“Yet,” Erica leered.

What the hell happened at Waffle House?!

----------

“I’ll have an Angus patty melt, and a slice of Aunt Maggie’s Triple Chocolate pie, please,” Braeden ordered as chaos descended around her.  “It’s like when I have food in front of me, everything is beautiful and nothing hurts.”

“That’s the magic of Waffle House,” Erica said sagely.

“It’s something,” Braeden replied. 

----------

She was scattered, smothered, covered in food debris, collateral damage from Stiles and Derek’s ongoing war.

“Don’t worry, Hunny,” a friendly woman in the adjacent booth told her.  “Throw a tide pod in with that shirt and the stains will come right out!  Just don’t eat it like those crazy kids are doing these days.”

“Who in their right mind would eat a tide pod?” Braeden asked.

  The answer was a serious side-eye.  “Who in their right mind would keep returning to a restaurant to tussle with the cook?”

Touche.

----------

Waffle House had a special Valentine’s Day candlelight dinner, which Braeden could have happily gone her whole life not knowing about or participating in.  

Erica sat them right next to the fancy new digital touchscreen jukebox.  Stiles came out, fed the machine twenty dollars, and set it to play “I Touch Myself” by Divinyls two-hundred and forty times on repeat.

Braeden wasn’t sure if Derek touched himself that night, but any guy who took her on a Valentine date to Waffle House and proceeded to fist-fight the cook certainly wasn’t going to be touching her.

__________

Braeden parked down the road and walked to Waffle House, unsurprised to find Derek’s car in the parking lot.  She’d quit going with him two weeks ago. To so many hungry, lost, and seriously hammered people, Waffle House’s warm yellow glow was a beacon of salvation.  For Braeden, who watched from the peaceful vantage point of the parking lot as her boyfriend grappled the skinny cook into a headlock and proceeded to give him a vicious noogie, it would forever be a reminder that Derek was the perfect guy for her, except when it came to Stiles.  Once upon a time, Braeden appreciated the fact that women everywhere were always looking at her man. He turned heads, but none of them ever seemed to turn his.  Except at Waffle House, and it wasn’t a woman.

Derek walked out of the restaurant twenty minutes later to find her sitting on the hood of his black Camaro.  “You’re breaking up with me, aren’t you?” he asked, monotone. She wondered at Drek’s equanimity, which has always seemed so inviting to her before.  Maybe Braeden just didn’t inspire passion in Derek, the way Stiles obviously did.  

She nodded.

“Is there anything I can say to change your mind?”

She shook her head.  “Not unless you can tell me what this is really about. Not unless you can tell me who you are.  Because this person isn’t the Derek I thought I knew.”

Lately, she’d been thinking a lot about a proverb her mother used to recite when she was younger.  Briseann an dúchais trí shúile an chait. The true nature of someone’s character is revealed through their eyes.  Derek’s head swiveled between Braeden and the view through the glass window, where Erica was helping Stiles off the floor, and Boyd was mopping up spilled chocolate milk, and several patrons were still surreptitiously filming the whole ordeal on their cellphones. Derek’s eyes followed Stiles like a wolf stalking prey.  “Shit, I—”

“Derek,” she said, sliding down the hood and coming to stand before him, “you were an amazing boyfriend and a great guy.”  Braeden sighed. “Except at Waffle House.” 

Derek shoved his fists into the front pockets of his too-tight jeans, scuffed the toe of his sneaker against the brick facade of the restaurant.  “Yeah,” he relented.  “I’m really sorry.”

“Me too, Derek.”  She gently patted his stubbled cheek.  “Good luck with-” she gestured toward the golden fluorescent lights, the black and yellow signage, at Stiles standing stock still and Bambi-eyed behind the counter, holding a chunk of frozen bacon to the top of his head- “whatever the hell this is.  I’ll see you around.”

She waved good-bye to Stiles through the window, who raised a hesitant hand back to her, and walked out of the parking lot.

Roughly a year and a half later, Braeden thumbed through a used newspaper while she waited at her local coffee shop for the barista to call her name.  She flipped from business to sports, passing the society section on her way, when a pithy headline caught her attention.  

Waffle Brawls lead to Wedding Bells.

Huh.  So that’s what all the fighting was really about.

Underneath the catchy title was a byline: “Groom learned sixteen new ways to cook eggs during fearsome flirtation.”

“Caramel Macchiato for Braeden!” 

Braeden tossed the paper onto the tabletop, leaving it open to Stiles and Derek’s wedding announcement, and left the coffee shop with a laugh on her lips.  

You couldn’t make this shit up.  Except at Waffle House.

__________

As per usual tumblr won’t let me link to anything so the Reddit post that inspired this story so you can find that in the notes!  Thanks for reading hope it made you laugh.

[recentanimenews]

Horimiya – 06 – It’s Getting Hot in Here

It’s still rather cold in these parts, so it’s refreshing for this week’s Horimiya to take place in the middle of summer. But even if it didn’t, it still radiates warmth and good vibes from every angle. Hori’s dad sees Miyamura in his school look for the first time and momentarily wonders who the hell he is.

Once he realizes it’s Miyamura, he insists they take a bath together to wash off the day’s heat. Coincidentally, Hori is watching a TV show wherein a lecher is about to assault a young woman, only for that woman to reveal she’s a skilled MMA fighter and kicks his ass.

In addition to being an amusing prism to Miyamura and Kyosuke’s dynamic, it also foreshadows a number of wonderful subversions of typical high school rom-com clichés, which like the warm and cozy aura of its main couple has fast become Horimiya specialty.

After dinner and past 8:30, Miyamura assumes he’s “worn out his welcome”, but that’s not for him to decide. Hori’s suggests he spend the night, though it’s Hori’s dad he’ll be sleeping beside. Kyousuke doesn’t interrogate him that night, only asking what Miyamura likes about his daughter. His response: she doesn’t judge people by appearances.

While this is primarily the story of Hori and Miyamura’s understated yet potently blossoming love, it’s also the story of Miyamura being accepted for who he is by his new friends at school, as well as flat-out becoming a member of Hori’s family.

It’s in this scenario he gets to see something no one else could: Hori wearing her middle school gym uniform as pajamas (when she stomps on her father to open the blinds that morning). It’s also so goddamn lovely when Hori’s mom corrects him when he’s headed out the door. He’s family, not a guest, so he should say ittekimasu, not ojamashimashita. My heart just about burst right there, but Horimiya was just getting started!

Unfortunately, most of the kids at Miyamura’s school either don’t know what a sweet guy he is and are all too willing to judge him by his “emo” appearance. When a couple guys spot him leaving the same house with Hori, it sets off a torrent of rumors at school that they’re dating.

I like how we get a little shot of Tooru and Yuki legitimately upset by this development, with Yuki actually weeping at the prospect of things turning sour just when Miyamura and Hori got their act together. I like more how despite the unsolicited attention and rumor-mongering, Hori takes everything in perfect stride. By now she’s quite comfortable confirming that Miyamura is her boyfriend, and doesn’t need to explain that relationship to anyone.

Miyamura, however, doesn’t fare as well. A common refrain in the halls is “wait…that Miyamura?”, as Hori is both hugely popular and has rejected a number of more “conventional” suitors. So Miyamura apparently decides that if the school wants a prettier cover, they’ll get it: he arrives the next day having cut his hair short, revealing his piercings and eyelashes.

It’s an interesting and complex choice by Miyamura that instantly changes the conversation, as he becomes an immediate sensation with the ladies. Rather than do it because he’s worried about adversely affecting Hori’s reputation (though that could be part of it) it feels more like an act of empowerment. It indicates that Miyamura is well aware he’s got the goods, he’s just never flaunted them at school.

Rather than passively keeping his chin up or not listening to the murmurings, Miyamura took an active step in the realignment of the conversation around him and Hori. With his new ‘do and the striking beauty it reveals, “wait…that Miyamura?” turns to “oh, that Miyamura!”. 

As one would expect, Hori isn’t used to Miyamura getting the added attention and adoration, and her reaction is to create a cold enough atmosphere around her that it shoos away the newcomers. When a girl snaps candid pics of Miyamura with their phone (without asking him, WTF!), Hori gets right in his face with a DSLR!

Despite the increased liveliness at school, what I love more than anything about both the news of Horimiya dating and Miyamura’s new look is that it doesn’t really affect their core relationship. Hori doesn’t seem hurt that Miyamura cut his hair without consulting her, and seems content with his prefab excuse that it’s summer and long hair is hot.

Hori may grow possessive at school—Miyamura is her bf; so she has every right to be!—but not so much so that she makes a federal case out of his makeover. Hori has Miyamura, and vice versa, and it’s no longer important that no one knows he’s a hottie or that they’re dating.

Since they’re the usual Horimiya, Miyamura comes home with Hori as usual, and has the unlikely but hilarious distinction of having a third distinctive look in three straight encounters with Hori’s dad. Before long, they’re answering an invite from Shindo to come to his place and help him eat bizarrely flavored hard candy.

It’s here where Miyamura again demonstrates his whimsical timing with romantic gestures, as he asks Hori how her candy tastes, then leans in and steals it from out of her mouth. She sheepishly says “he stole my candy” the way Jujutsu Kaisen’s Kasumi sheepishly says Maki stole her sword, but what he really stole was their first kiss….just like that! For the record, that candy tasted like clay, which should make the kiss that much harder to forget!

Horimiya lets that kiss simmer on the back burner a bit as we return to school, where the novelty of Miyamura’s new look has thankfully worn off…with one exception: a diminutive girl with similarly black hair and similarly blue eyes seems to be watching, following, straight-up stalking Miyamura.

When Hori and Yuki encounter her in the hall, she asks if Hori and Miyamura are dating, Hori says yes, what of it?!, and the girl beats a hasty retreat, seemingly intimidated. Miyamura’s sudden popularity bounce perfectly sets up this latest high school rom-com cliché, the new love rival, second-year Sawada Honoka.

Before long, Sawada is striding up to Miyamura and flat-out telling him to break up with Hori already, in earshot of others. But in another excellent subversion, it’s not Miyamura Sawada likes…it’s Hori. Thanks to the rumors, she’s learned Miyamura stole a march on her. But she declares she liked Hori first, and won’t accept Miyamura dating her.

This turns into a physical tug-of-war between Sawada and Miyamura, with a flustered Hori as the rope. Tooru can only watch with other classmates in amusement at the spectacle before them, and even texts Yuki to hurry over to watch. Miyamura, clearly no longer hiding who he is at school, finally forcefully grabs Hori into his arms and declares “she’s mine!”, echoing her own words when Remi prodded her about him.

After school, Sawada seemingly follows Miyamura home, only for them to realize that not only are they both heading home in the same direction, they are goddamn next-door neighbors! This is the kind of twist a show that’s built up as much goodwill and credibility as Horimiya can get away with all day long, in my book.

It also marks a further expansion of Miyamura’s relationships, as it’s clear these two aren’t going to just ignore each other from here on out. Sawada forgot her key, so he does what any decent person would do and invites her over to sample some cake from his family’s bakery. Their ensuing conversation starts with, but is not dominated by, Hori, as Sawada learns Hori rarely visits Miyamura’s place since he always goes to her place.

Sawada also assumed that Miyamura had a little brother or sister, since he’s clearly good at taking care of people. Miyamura laughs at that comment, which reminds Sawada of the older brother she says she “had”—past tense—before laughing it off herself. She’s saved by the bell when her folks come home, so she heads out, but Miyamura says she’s always welcome to stop by for some cake.

Miyamura isn’t fooled by Sawada’s last-second fakeout. Sure enough, he learns from his mom that the Sawadas lost their eldest son some time last year, who attended a different school from Izumi but was “such a nice boy”.

At first I wondered why the character designer took such pains to make Sawada so closely resemble Miyamura—was she his long-lost little sister? When we learned she liked Hori, I abandoned that theory as a bridge too far for this show, but it isn’t lost on me how quickly and easily Miyamura is portrayed as a potential surrogate big bro.

Sure enough, the next day Sawada is hounded by three boys, and she retreats to Miyamura, digging her head in his back. It only takes a momentary glare from Miyamura to disperse the lads, but it can’t be understated how glad Sawada must’ve been to have him in that moment. Naturally, when Hori shows up they’re back to competing over who likes Hori more.

Finally, in another wonderful use of what Hori’s watching on TV as a reflection of what goes on in the Hori household, she is forcing both Miyamura and, more pointedly, her dad, to watch a horror movie in which a daughter kills her father. It underscores both Hori’s taste in cinema and the tactics she’ll use to try to get her dad to leave the room, which he eventually does.

Almost the moment her dad’s gone, Hori brushes her knees together and tries her hand at Miyamura’s patented casual romantic utterances, stating “you never make any moves on me, huh.” When Miyaura responds by asking “do you want me to?” she turns red with embarrassment, causing him to chuckle over how cute she looks. Then he asks what kind of moves she wants him to make, then leans in to kiss her.

Kyousuke barges back in asking for change to buy his smokes, and the two lovebirds immediately separate, invoking her dad’s cheeky suspicion, and causing Hori to attempt to reenact the dad-murdering scene from the movie. While I’d hoped they could have shared their first kiss in which both of them were aware a kiss was going to happen here and now, at least they didn’t chicken out; they were simply interrupted. They’ll soon learn to seek places with a bit more privacy!

By: sesameacrylic

[linearao3]

Challenge prompt for February; Rey and Ben are texting each other filthy things to rile each other up before they get home to do said filthy things to each other

The prompt does not explicitly specify, but I have derived from, uh, context clues, that this is intended, like the last anonymous prompt, for the Rey and Ben of Kohelet 3:16, in their LA life.  And that is what I have delivered.  Doing the text formatting I did in the story proper is kind of exhausting on Tumblr, so you will have to figure out who is typing from their style.  (When I answered the prompt on Friday night, I was like, “This is probably among the dirtiest things I’ve ever written.”  But I may have topped myself?)

i miss u

Oh, you do, do you?

I’ve heard that one before.

yeah u have

so u know what i mean

You mean you miss my mouth on your cunt.

oh I miss lots of things

but yeah now that u mention it…

its a very nice mouth

Yes, well, I’m extremely busy clerking, so you’ll just have to wait.

ben. we both know how good u are @ waiting.

But we’re talking about YOU waiting.

uh huh

u kno i went to work in just a camisole today

it’s too hot out for bras

if I get too turned on someone might notice

Rey.

but ur busy clerking so i guess im just gonna have to finish out the day like this

REY I AM ACTUALLY BUSY CLERKING

but ur answering ur texts

I’m going to stop now. I’m going to put my phone in my bag on silent and read this brief.

ben if i come to ur office wd you fuck me in a bathroom?

if u came to mine we have this nice supply closet full of snacks

u cd have fruit leather AND get ur dick sucked

sounds fun right??

sounds fun to me

i love it when im sucking ur cock and u start pushing ur hips

like u cant help it

like u need it

does it feel good?

fucking my mouth like that?

i love it when u pull my hair and make me take ur cock

oh u cn def see my nips thru my shirt ben

someone’s gonna walk by and see and think code compiling makes me hot

or maybe they’ll think

oh she’s prolly texting her bf i bet he fucks her good

bet shes a dirty little slut for him

bet shes wet right now just thinking about the sounds he makes when she gets on her knees and sucks him off

shdnt a brief be short ben its called a brief

I’m not your boyfriend. And “good” doesn’t apply to what I’m going to do to you when I get home, Rey.

u kno thats how i like it

Yes; I know just how you like it.

you do. 

I would have anyway. You didn’t have to go through all this. All you have to do is ask nicely, once, when we’re both home.

i AM asking nicely.

arent i?

oh shd i say please?

Yes. You should. You have no manners.

PLEASE show me what happens to dirty little sluts with no manners

Rey.

sir.

Fuck.

You murderous little bitch, you’re going to kill me.

dont die ben

if u die i might have to fuck someone else, and they wouldn’t be as good

English lacks vocabulary to express how evil you are.

but i only want u

because ur my favorite and i love you best

You daughter of Lilith.

I’m going to make you scream.

lol guess what

What, Rey.

delays on the expo line

im still downtown

u at home yet?

I wouldn’t be texting you if I were driving.

a safe driver AND a nice cock what a husband i have

She knows Ben’s going to be waiting for her just inside the door and he is. He grabs her from behind, her keys still jingling in her hand. “You filthy little brat,” he breathes in her ear, as his right hand moves slowly over the curve of her hip and his left one draws her close. “You made me blush in front of a federal judge. I had to tell her you’d sent me a compliment.”

“I did.” She works her hips against his stiffening cock. “I sent you lots of compliments.”

“You sent me pornography.” Rey wasn’t lying about having forgone a bra. It’s hot; the AC’s on but he has his sleeves rolled up above his elbows. Both his hands come up to toy with her breasts, kneading and teasing. “You sent me a lot of texts about sucking my cock.”

“Oh,” she says. “Did those catch your interest?”

“Get on your fucking knees,” he says, but she can’t; he’s holding her too tightly against him. She tries to pull away, to show him that she can’t do what he says, but he only strengthens his grip and grinds into her.

“You like it?” he asks her. “You like sucking your husband’s cock? Like a good little slut?”

“Not good.” She turns her head, trying to kiss his jaw, his neck. “Naughty. Dirty. Bad.” She licks him, the rough, shaven skin of his neck. It makes her feel like an animal, but she doesn’t care; she can be an animal with him.

“You are bad,” he agrees, “you’re so bad you make me crazy. So bad you make me cry.” He kisses her. His lips are so soft; his tongue is so subtle. “But you look so good with my cock in your mouth.” He loosens his grip and turns her in his arms so he can kiss her more thoroughly. “Show me, Rey.”

She likes to tease him, draw out playing with his belt while she smiles up at him, but he has no patience for that now; she isn’t even on the floor before he has his cock out and one hand on her head. She purses her lips at the head of his cock and takes him into her mouth slowly, stroking him lightly with her tongue. He almost staggers, his other hand grasping her shoulder to keep his balance as he buckles with pleasure.

Their apartment is small, without much empty space; it only takes a little shove from her to have him against the arm of the couch. He leans on it and looks down at her as she works at him with her hands and her mouth. He sighs brokenly before he can gather himself to whisper to her. “Yes. Fuck. Look at you.” She turns her head slightly, looks up at him. His eyes are wide, dazed, staring at her; after only a moment he groans and throws his head back, as if meeting her gaze was too much for him. His hand strokes blindly, clumsily at her hair.

His hips are beginning to make the small, pleading thrusts Rey’d texted him about. She slides her mouth off his cock and stoops a little to take one of his balls in her mouth. His hand clenches on her head and his moan is almost a sob as she sucks gently, then moves to the other with a pop of suction. His free hand clenches on the scratchy felt of the couch. She licks up a drop of pre-come, and puts his cock between her lips again. The taste of him goes so perfectly with the smell of him; she bobs her head at a leisurely, savoring pace, and reaches down to rub herself through her jeans.

He hisses at her, and drags her off him by her hair, ignoring her noises of protest. He turns her around again, unbuttoning her pants, as he pushes her against the arm of the couch. “I know how you like it.” He yanks her pants and underwear to her knees and pushes lightly on her shoulder blades; she falls eagerly. “I know just how you like it. And I am going to make you scream, aren’t I?”

“Yes,” she says into the cushions, and then his fingers are inside her, flexing, beckoning, while the tip of his thumb settles just shy of her clit, pulling at the hood without ever touching the pearl, and Rey groans and twists and kicks her legs helplessly, but his fingers are relentless and her groans become small, aching cries.

Then his other hand closes in her hair, pulling her back into an arch, and she knows what’s coming; he pulls his fingers out of her, and her body, which must have no sense of self-preservation, clenches down as he pushes his cock in. She screams around the wet fingers he thrusts into her mouth as he fucks her, bracing himself against the couch, and he does know just how she likes it; she likes it just like this, just like he gives it to her, her forearms burning where they rub against the felt, her back tight as a bow, and her hips driven into the arm of the couch as he rides her.

“Such a bad girl.” He’s so deep inside her. She ruts back against him frantically; she’s mad with pleasure; she’s an animal in his arms and he will keep her with him. “Don’t I give you what you want?”

“Yes,” she cries. Fuck – fuck – she’s so close. “I need it.”

“You do,” he agrees. “Look at you. Ah. You do.” And he fucks her even harder, until she comes, gasping and thrashing and screaming, again.

The instant she’s quieted down, he pulls out of her and drags her backwards; she isn’t sure if he wants her on her knees or on her back, and she ends up half-slumped against the couch with his left hand in her hair and his right jerking furiously at his cock.

“You wanted to see,” he grits. “Want to see what happens – to dirty little sluts – with no manners?”

“Yes,” she says, “yes, please.”

His jaw is clenched; his hand on her head is clenched. “Call me sir.”

“Please, sir,” she begs, and he drags her close and comes on her face in hot, shocking spurts, choking and groaning above her.

He sways and falls to his knees, cradling her face in his hands, with a stunned look, like he’s bewitched, like he can’t believe what he sees. Then he falls again, backwards, onto the floor, taking her with him, clutched to his chest. “Rachel,” he says, and she can feel it in her bones, the way his deep voice is torn from his chest. “Rachel.”

They lie there on the floor, still half-dressed, soaked with sweat and come, and she hears his heart, like hers, begin to slow. Around the edges of the blinds, the sun is still warm, and the AC hums from the bedroom. His fingers run through her hair, catching on tangles he’s put there himself. They will get up; he will carry her (if she lets him) into the shower, and he’ll wash her carefully, rubbing the soap in thorough, soothing circles, repeating variations on her name, Rey, Rachel, Ruchele. Shaina maidle, habibati, dodi. They will put on clothes again, and order a pizza, or he’ll run down the street to the taco truck on Venice. But for now they just lie here, and she feels him shift, and tells him what he wants to know before he can ask it.

“You are still my favorite,” she says, and kisses his hand, “and I still love you best.”