#Anyway lol onto what this is Actually about
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koji-haru · 1 day ago
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I kind of want to write one of those cliché tropes where the mc thought their childhood friend was a girl.
Rough idea:
Adam (age 7) is from a family of well known doctors/healers. They travel all the time, from kingdom to kingdom, staying there for maybe only a year before moving onto their next destination. In a way, that's kind of how they like to expand their knowledge of medicine.
In this new kingdom they moved into, Adam, while playing in the capital's square, meets Michael (age 8), a prince of the country, sneaking out of the palace. Michael, being terrible at lying, introduces himself as Mika as a fake name. The two become really close friends and almost played together every day, and little Adam even develops a crush on 'Mika'. However, about a year later, Adam's family decides to move again, and as a farewell present, Michael gifts Adam a necklace, specially designed to be unique to remember him by.
15 years later, Adam, now grown and also now a well-known healer of animals, comes back to the kingdom. His memory of the country is a little foggy, but he remembers the pretty girl he used to be friends with and had a crush on when he was younger, and was hoping a little bit to meet her again, even though the chances were slim to none.
Anyway, Adam eventually gets hired by the palace to look over and treat the sick horses. And when he does come by to check the horses, Michael, now current heir to the throne, is also there. One of the horses is his, and so he's also there to comfort his sick pet. They greet each other with Michael explaining what was wrong with the animals, etc. Adam just assumes Michael works at the palace, even though he was dressed a little too nicely for staff, but whatever. After looking over the animals, Adam decides to give them something to ease the symptoms before he comes back again with the needed treatments. He tucks in his necklace into his shirt to avoid it getting in the way. And that's when Michael notices the uniqueness of the jewellery.
Michael: Adam?
Adam: Yes?
Michael: Did you happen to be in the country about 15 years ago? From a family of healers?
Adam: ...
Michael: ...
Adam: ...Mika..?
Michael: Yes! Well, um, it's Michael actually.
And then Adam gets another heart attack when he finds out that Michael is the current crown prince lol.
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the-100-days-of-junkan · 2 days ago
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Day 53
Alright so I’m gonna level with you. 
I REALLY wanted to do a V3 based pic for this day. However at the time I couldn’t for the life of me come up with an actual idea for it.
I think it’s because I was very tunnel visioned on specifically trying to do something with Junko Enoshima the 53rd, for very obvious reasons. This was back before I really had any opinions on Tsumugi, at that point the space she held in my brain was “Unique Antagonist that shows up semi-often in Junkan Fics.”
Which isn’t like, the best way one could view the character I can imagine. Though she had it better than Yasuke at least I didn’t even know who he was outside of occasionally appearing in these fics until like, somewhere in the first month of Project Production. I’ve never read DR0, someday though. someday. 
Anyway back to Tsumugi, mostly thanks to the local bandit, I’ve come to appreciate the character a lot more. I’m not like, an expert on the character. I'm still kind of feeling things out purely through osmosis, i’m not really an expert on nothing. However I like her a lot more than I used to, which means I have hindsight.
If I was making Day 53 right now I would probably just make some kind of art about Tsumugi being a Junkan Shipper. We’ve all given characters headcanon based on ourselves before, gender, sexuality, personal experiences, that weird clicking thing you can do with your thumb (or is that just me?), we love to impart aspects of ourselves onto these characters. 
And when the hell else am I going to headcanon such a specific fuckin’ aspect of myself such as “I ship Junkan” onto a character? It’s Tsumugi or nothing.
Honestly I’m not gonna guarantee but I might actually just make a pic based on what I’m currently thinking for a Tsumugi Themed Junkan art, and just, posted the same day as this one? If I do i’ll schedule it in advance to post like, an hour or two after this one. Enjoy the suspense of whether I actually did that or not! 
Oh, and I actually edited this image a bit. Both because I thought Junko's face just looked, bad in this. But also for reasons I'm not gonna bother getting into right now. However as a result we got this funny bit during the editing process
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What if Junko was creepypasta lol . . . . . . . oh
oh god DAMMIT WAIT I LIKE THIS. Now I can't draw it until this Day gets released! DAMMIT!
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flodaya · 2 days ago
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Do people know that actors have a script and know how big or small is the role they are booking in.
These complaints about Zebdaya's roles in big movies is nonsense. She decided to do them. But also Dune like Homecoming were designed to be small with a bigger role in the second movie.
Why this people are complaining so much about The Nolan movie, nobody knows how big or small her role is, even so she was happy to do it.
So many actors in Hollywood are so happy to be in a Nolan movie, not matter the role. Why they think Zendaya is this huge star that can't be doing a supporting role with Directors like Nolan or Denis.
The reality here is, they are not mad that Z is doing a supporting role in the Nolan movie, they are mad because Tom is having a leading role in the same movie.
and they act like supporting roles immediately mean insignificant, i feel like literature class has failed us because are people aware each character in a well-written story serves a very important purpose?
anyway, i somehow enjoy arguing about this endlessly because it all just sounds so silly from the other side, Z signed onto a Nolan project so early in her career and that is an amazing opportunity for her, imagine telling anyone outside stan circles that being a supporting character in his movie is somehow a bad thing lol
anyway: "they are mad because Tom is having a leading role in the same movie" PREACH they make tz a competition when in reality they are clearly a team
edit: actually i dont think they had a script for the new Nolan movie but.... like come on, who wouldnt sign on, i'm sure they approx know what they signed up for
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mh2o29 · 2 days ago
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dont mind me just adding onto this post if we're all being sappy...
Reading these two posts really connected with me because it reminded me of my own experience with this fanbase. Genuinely, my interest in Scream and the level of enjoyment that I got from it is what pushed me to make this account and start posting my art online.
Before this, I had never really had any experience existing and posting in an active fanbase. Growing up I was definitely just a lurker, always browsing and consuming content but never interacting with the people in the fanbase I was into. I was envious of those who did but was always too scared to join in because of my own self doubt, feeling ashamed about my interests and cringing at myself.
Flash forward to Halloween of my senior year of college. My lovely friend @graaacc invited me over to their place to watch Scream for the first time. We turned all the lights off, got stoned, and then settled in. Lives were changed that night, no joke (mine). Like that shit was crazy and had me looking to my friend asking if the gay shit playing on the screen was actually there and real LOL. Thus started a hyperfixation that has yet to end over a year later.
I deep dove into the fanbase and consumed whatever I could find. This is where I also shoutout @sharpth1ng and Debaser because that fic and its author are crazy amazing!!! (hi sharpy bestie >:D ) This was also how I found the Debaserverse discord, which introduced me to so many lovely people and provided many good memories and good friends. I found so much inspiration and support that drove away my own fear and shame. For the first time ever I allowed myself to fully embrace my love for something and the urge to share it. I started posting my fanart and received so much love and support from those around me which I'll forever be grateful for. I've had such an amazing time in this fanbase and the community it comes with and I'm so excited to continue being apart of it.
I'm seconding sharpy in saying that we truly have created a very positive and welcoming community with each other and thats so awesome!! I'm definitely proud to be apart of it and everyone else should too. (also seconding the shoutout to the ace people here I LOVE ASEXUAL PEOPLE SHOUTOUT MY FELLOW ACES!!!)
Anyways, all that's to say is that I'll always cherish my memories and experience with this fanbase here on Tumblr (and other platforms but yall here are the OGs). Scream and everything that came with it will always have a special place in my heart and I thank every one of yall that helped make that happen <3
This is just gonna be me rambling but okay. yeah.
One year ago my Scream (1996) / Stuilly hyperfixation started developing and here i am today, still obsessed, still fond of them. I watched Scream (1996) for the first time when i was like 15-16 years old ( i'm 23 now lol) but last November i rewatched it with my close friends and little by little it got into my system. I'm sobbing a lot as i write this because stuff like this and meaningful dates make me weak as fuck !! I've loved horror since i was in my middle teen years but this year i really really got into horror thanks to Billy and Stu. This year i've watched 360 movies and i'm sure that 300~ of those are horror movies. It saved my life and i mean it, i'm so passionate about horror, it brings me huge amounts of joy. It's been a fucking shitty year but watching horror movies and focusing on the art, the fics, the edits, the headcanon posts, making stupid playlists etc ... made the dark times a little less darker. I don't know, i suck at developing healthy copying mechanisms and this is ironic (Because Billy and Stu are toxic as fuck) but they are my copying mechanism. This is a small fandom even if Scream is a really popular franchise but the actual stuilly fandom is a really really really small community, especially if you are into the freaky stuff (y'know) but i couldn't care less. It's a great one <3 I've discovered many movies and many music and so many beautiful things that cheer me up every single day. Shout out to Debaser and Wave of Mutilation by @sharpth1ng (GO READ IT NOW !!! ) I didn't find Debaser, Debaser found me when i was at my lowest and it's been my comfort piece of media for so many awful lonely months. Shout out to Billy Loomis for being my favorite piece of shit and forcing me to grow stupid fucking middle part bangs. And shout out to Wes Craven for being a forever legend. I hope this hyperfixation lasts as long as it can because it feels like home. Amen.
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sysig · 11 months ago
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I remember this game (Patreon)
#Doodles#Terrible news: My hair has gotten long enough that it's trying to center-part all on its own#I need a haircut so bad I don't care how cold it is#Anyway lol onto what this is Actually about#Namely of refixating on Handplates lol - I totally called it ♪ Not that it was hard to guess pfft#When I think about it - I don't think I've ever talked about how I found Vargas through Handplates? :0#Which is weird to me looking back lol they were both very pivotal moments in my life! One affects the other affects the other on loop#It's a very interesting dance inside my head haha#Being So back on Handplates now really throws that into relief for me#Not to be cheesy Immediately lol but I'm just- so happy that I get to experience these stories ♥ That I get to Keep experiencing them :)#It's only gotten better with time I wonder if it'll ever stop haha - I keep falling more in love with them!#It's really unlike anything else I could compare them to - holistically excellent across the board#If there was just One Thing that I could pin down and say ''This Right Here is the The Thing that I like so much and am so inspired by''#But there isn't - there isn't just one thing it's everything!#If it wasn't everything I wouldn't be so inspired by Handplates to make Vargas stuff and so inspired by Vargas to appreciate Handplates#And everything in between! Helix and RespectAWoman and just- It's everything! It's holistic excellence!#Even when I first transferred over from Handplates to Vargas it was everything - up to that point anyway haha#I'm just....always having a good time when I'm reading ♥ It's my favourite-favourite#I feel very lucky :)#Handplates#I mean - ostensibly anyway lol
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13eyond13 · 1 year ago
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underrated funny thing about lawlight is they never actually did get to confirm that 100% of the time they were basically thinking exactly what the other person thought they were thinking every single time
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aardvaark · 6 months ago
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expanding on that post about sophie devereaux backstories, grift ones and real ones and the things in between:
a year or two after they meet, tara and sophie are somewhere near drunk in a hotel room after a con, high heels thrown against the wall, dresses unzipped and halfway off. tara asks for her Story. the Story. and maybe she wouldn’t have asked if she were sober or maybe tara is simply a little too bloody brave sometimes, a little too determined.
so sophie tells her about a father in the military, a mother who died young, a family that moved houses, towns, regions, countries, all the time growing up. about lying to impress kids at every new school. about desperately doing almost anything to fit in for the months or year she’d stay in that area. about sweet talking her way out of a few little crimes here and there, cash that she would certainly never steal from her rich friends’ parents’ wallets, some driving rules she broke when she was too young to even have a license, yet old enough for a cop to encourage her flirting. sophie tells tara that her father died when she was 19, and the grief had led to recklessness. she made a mistake on a too-ballsy grift. she would’ve gone to jail. instead, she faked her death (for the first of many times) and never looked back. it’s the only funeral of hers that she didn’t attend.
and then, tara told her an equally untrue Story in return.
when sophie is duchess charlotte prentiss, her husband william asks far too many questions about her past. of course, charlotte has a Story. all of her aliases have Stories, even the ones she only uses for a day - they all have birthdays, childhood pets, first kisses, people they love. so she tells him that her parents died in a car crash when she was 16 and instead of going into the foster system, the authorities figured she was old enough to become an emancipated minor. she tells him how it was difficult at times, incredible at others, and sad and exciting and embarrassing and bittersweet. she weaves a damn good tale about charlottes life, if she may say so herself - one that’s just painful enough for william to stop asking questions. it works perfectly. but when she tucks astrid into bed that night, and the little girl looks up at her with big round eyes and asks if ‘charlotte’ misses her mummy and daddy and says that she’s sad for ‘charlotte’ because she knows what it’s like to miss a mama… sophie freezes. there’s a lump in her throat and goosebumps on her skin. she blinks down the tears and recovers just enough to fake a smile and kiss astrid’s forehead as she leaves the room. lying has never hurt like this before. it takes all her strength to shut it down, shove the emotions in some tiny box in her head that she simply refuses to acknowledge. she decides, then, that she has to leave this house as soon as possible.
the charlotte Story is one of many that hardison finds. it’s inevitable, when he has to cover all their tracks so thoroughly, that hardison would stumble upon various old aliases. he only learns about the charlotte one from the job in england - there’s no links between her and sophie, but he destroys a decent amount of excess duchess charlotte prentiss information just in case, and then looks for any other mysterious women who happened to pop up or vanish around that time. he notices that there are some things that all of sophie’s aliases share: their parents are dead, they have no siblings, and their life changed dramatically somehow in their mid-to-late teens (usually with those parents’ deaths, or gaining an inheritance, or moving far away). he knows that these are all pretty standard, convenient details for a fake identity. but he wonders, sometimes. couldn’t she have made up dead siblings? estranged but alive parents? a dramatic event in her early childhood or in her twenties? he doesn’t know if the consistent parts mean anything. he doesn’t ask for her Story - not outright, at least. though for the first couple months of knowing her, he does sometimes enquire about little things here and there. did she grow up with sisters, what was her high school like - that sort of stuff. information is his thing, sue him! sometimes sophie just smiles. sometimes she answers, and he eventually learns that her truths, at least, are very much relative. when he decides that she is family - which is pretty early on, to be honest - he also decides not to ask anymore. he destroys old aliases when necessary, but he never reads more than he has to. he loves sophie and that is enough.
eliot never asks anything about her life. not even the innocent, casual, unthinking questions that sophie is used to from other people: where’d you grow up? did you ever have any pets? i always had to share a room with my sister, what about you? eliot clearly avoids asking her any of it. she’s somewhat surprised by that. sure, he’s polite, but he’s also suspicious both by nature and due to certain unfortunate experiences, so she sort of expected him to interrogate her when they first met.
one night, they’re the last two left at nate’s apartment. even nate had gone to bed and left them there, long given up on shooing his team out at appropriate times. sophie’s been drinking tea and flipping through a latvian phrase book to refresh her memory for tomorrow’s grift, and apparently that 90-minute-a-day sleep schedule allows for eliot to be doing one-handed push ups in the living room at this ungodly hour. too tired to retain any more information, sophie studies eliot instead. he’s a straightforward guy. she decides to be straightforward too. she breaks the silence of the apartment and simply asks - is he ever curious about her Story? eliot pauses a moment. looks her in the eye, quiet. doesn’t brush her off gruffly like she thought he might. instead, he asks if she’s ever curious about What He’s Done. that is answer enough for the both of them. they don’t talk for the rest of the night, each going back to their own activities, but the silence isn’t uncomfortable. on the contrary - the mutual understanding ends up solidifying their relationship.
nate isn’t always so intensely careful about his questions like eliot. well, actually, there were many times back in his insurance days that he very much did ask her questions on purpose. and of course, for five years, he asks after her real name. sophie generally thinks of it as a fun game. she smiles at his useless determination and teases him when he comes back from jail. after a while, though, she realizes that the questions about her Story mostly stopped when leverage formed, and stop completely once he proposed. nate never hears any version of her Story. she’s here now, and that’s all he needs or wants to know - just like how sophie is her real name in any way that matters.
the moment that sophie realizes this is the moment she stops caring about the real Story, the burden of the secret and the guilt and shame of keeping it from her newfound family. in that moment, she understands that what happened back then is just a small drop in the ocean, irrelevant to the life she’s built and come to love. she never tells them the story, and she never needs to.
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sammygender · 6 months ago
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so many people can’t conceptualise emotional neglect as anything other than ‘my parents were cold and distant and never talked about feelings with me’, and this, while being just a general awful problem of course, is also what leads to so much john winchester mischaracterisation. in this essay i will
#like. it can also be#a parent who you’re close to who is actually extremely emotional and explosive and reactive#and via forcing you to look after their emotional needs and spilling their problems all over you also teaches you that your feelings qrs re#unimportant and that you’re unimportant. even if they dont necessarily mean to or they dont with their words!#anyway i’m sure john winchester was a mix of the two#but my point is like. God this applies to so much actually#there’s this incredibly pervasive idea that damaging parenting has to be like. i dunno. distant somehow#your parents don’t love you. you’re not close to your parents#and obviously that IS damaging but it’s not the only way a parental relationship can be damaging… far from it#and a lot of what makes john so interesting to me is he DOES love the boys. of course he does#and he isn’t some hyper repressed incredibly macho figure either like some people characterise him#he’s warm with the boys when we see him in s1. sure he turns all his emotions into anger but it’s always very clear he Has deep emotions.#everything he does is powered by ‘love’#(theoretically).#like. hes obviously close with dean. he even has strong ideals about parenting when he starts off (see 70s era john disgusted at how future#john actually raised them lol).#and he’s still extremely abusive and neglectful and damages sam and dean soooo much. like. all that can coexist#and it’s such a disservice to flatten his character and pretend it doesn’t#plus it just offends me. like come on.#idk i guess a lot of people like to project their own bad experiences onto john and it’s not like i’m saying they shouldn’t do that#but. characterisation wise#he’s awful in a very specific way#spn#john winchester#oliver talks
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blueskittlesart · 2 years ago
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POST MORE SWORD OF FATE PLS IM BEGGING
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i have very little in terms of actual art LMAO but i CAN explain the sword thing because i checked and i did in fact never make this plot point public. i struggled for a while with creating a villain for this story until i realized that. i put "sword" in the title of the game. of course it has to be about the fucking sword. DUH.
so i want SOF to deal very heavily with religion, specifically the way in which hyrule's religion forms post-sksw but pre-reincarnation. i've placed it on the timeline directly after sksw, making it the first actual reincarnation in hyrule. what this means is that there's no actual proof yet that the reincarnation thing is real and not just an insane bluff on demise's part, and so several key characters including link and zelda barely believe in hylia or demise at all when the story starts. my thought with this setting's version of ganon is that he's the polar opposite of the nonbelievers. The gerudo don't really exist as of now, but he DOES come from the desert region of hyrule--specifically, he was raised in a cultlike offshoot of the sheikah religion which interpreted the hylia/demise myth completely literally and believes that a doomsday is coming, heralded by the foretold return of demise. Because of this, he knows more about the cycle and how to set it in motion than basically any other character. Crucially, he and his people are some of the only ones at this point aware of the existence of the master sword.
ganon finds. a sword. a sword which he THINKS is the master sword. and this theory is only reinforced when the sword begins to speak to him about his destiny and the salvation of hyrule. unfortunately it is not the master sword and he ends up basically a pawn in the greater plans of what's left of demise & ghirahim within that sword, manipulated into attempting to revive demise and destroy the reincarnated hero and princess. he remains in denial until basically the very end of the final battle, completely convinced that he is the true savior of hyrule and LINK is the one being misled. ghirahim is a very good manipulator lol
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beansterpie · 7 months ago
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rewatching LoK, i'm being reminded how much I dislike the.... the brothers, mako and bolin, yanno? they're such underwhelming characters on basically every level. it'd almost be impressive if they weren't in every episode and didn't annoy me so much ugh
#bean talking into the void#also this show in general is very flawed lol#cool things about it but the choice to structure it more like a#prestige tv show#as in each season follows One Story#is... i wouldn't say it was a bad choice but i feel like you can see the growing pains#switching over from the episodic structure of ATLA#s1 while flawed is solid#it knows what it's trying to do even if it doesn't always stick the landing#season two feels like a season-long filler episode LMFAO#which is hilarious because a lot of world-building stuff happens#but tonally it's all over the place#serious political plots interspersed with the B Plot following Tenzin and his family#on vacation???#so fucking random#but anyway back to roasting the brothers#i find bolin just annoying in general his brand of comedy totally doesn't work for me#but at least he has like#a personality that's consistent#mako is sooooooo blah#the writers have no idea what to do with him and he comes across as having a strikingly boring personality#with no defining traits other than being wishy washy (and a boot licker)#it FEELS like he was meant to remind viewers of Zuko#at least in appearance if nothing else#another broody pretty boy to latch onto#but he has literally nothing interesting to actually get invested in#sure he's got his tragic backstory and he's the 'older brother who took care of his younger brother after their parents died' boo hoo#but that's all just exposition and it's barely shown in a way that feels illustrative or emotional in any way that matters#(other than him comforting bolin in s1 after he KISSES THE GIRL HE KNEW BOLIN HAD A CRUSH ON lmfaoooooo)#(what a good big brother lmfao)
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todayisafridaynight · 10 months ago
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no one even knows ive been hot gluing this frame to my brain walls for the past three days
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apollo-just-ice · 3 months ago
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The funniest and saddest thing perhaps is how captivated I have been by Skaði/Njörðr lately…
Yeah. Njörðr from Feh and his… presumably existing wife that isn’t even in Feh in any shape way or form atm.
I mean I’ve taken what can be learnt from Norse mythology and have made her into my own character, basically, but still…
I am working on a fic rn but man. Who is gonna get this except me? It’s crazy. But I am having fun with it soooooo. Hopefully that’ll be enough <3
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scientologyblows · 1 year ago
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okay but lets be very serious here right now, when they release a statement what exactly is that gonna change? don admitted to him and lex having intercourse (which shows that he coerced her) and matt and ryans texts show that the situation was handled VERY poorly. an apology isnt enough for the trauma they both have caused
#cuz you know its bad when even the subreddit is on their ass they’re usually dickriding m and r anytime someone makes valid criticism#theyve been let off the hook too many times a line needs to be drawn and this needs to be it#im sorry but sa is not something you can simply look past especially when they have a history of brushing serious shit off#what is there to even hold onto for them its not like theyre dropping bangers like they used to#theyre in drama every other month i know thats the appeal to some of yall but when things get this serious it shouldnt be hard to drop them#especially when they have piles of evidence lined up against them showing that they only really care about their channel and their image lol#yes im still talking shit because im very disappointed#also saying quote unquote check up on the big fan accs theyre going through it is very weird lol. we should be checking up on the victims#anyways the bad publicity will probably make them lose sponsorships and yall know the podcast was one of the only things holding them-#together financially LOL#worst part is matt and ryan have people relying on them to get paid.. their company is about to go to shit all bc they have no backbone#jacksons comeback post is gonna be a pic of matt watson flipping burgers at chickfila in a year or 2#yeah yeah this is my last post about it for now until one of them says something i just needed to get these thoughts out there#rest in piss supermega your actions actually do have consequences and its clear theyre not used to being put on the spot like this#theyre used to people letting everything slide i know theyre all screaming and crying right now 😂
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melverie · 7 months ago
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Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh today I've been constantly experiencing the urge to un-private today-in-the-devildom & start writing for it again
#i'm gonna ramble in the tags but#i've been talking with starr (if you're reading this--hi starr!! <3) about the blog today and sharing some of the entries#and it just made me miss it so much#+ the conversation actually made me realize some other reasons why i didn't enjoy the blog in general anymore#like i genuinely love the blog and i genuinely loved writing for it & that conversation reminded me of that#but also there were so many reasons that ultimately pushed me to more or less abandon the blog & then later private it too#so i'm kind of at a loss here#tbh i think i'm mostly just scared to pick the blog up again only for it to end exactly like last time i picked it back up#i've actually always wanted for the blog to be a source of inspiration y'know?#like the things mentioned in the entries are kinda just small ideas right#i was hoping that people would read these & feel inspired to write or draw something of their own based on my entries#that was actually what made me start the blog in the first place. the hope that i could inspire others that way#aaahhhhhh.... maybe it's on me since i could have more openly communicated that idea......#i did get to meet one wonderful person who wrote a few fics based on my entries tho!! (hi ali <3)#but yeah..there's that#also the way engagement just dropped significantly after a while#like i know i was gone for a good while & that a lot of people left the fandom and all that#but still getting maybe one reblog if i'm lucky really feels like a punch to the gut#ESPECIALLY considering that i was close to 900 followers on there#do you guys know that feeling when you proudly show someone you care about something you did only to get a disinterested answer?#yeah...#that's essentially how it feels like to me#and well as you might know the feeling of “why should i keep writing if apparently no one cares” eventually won... haha.....#but aaaahhhhh i'm still clinging onto the hope & what ifs here#that conversation with starr really just made me forget about everything that frustrated me about the blog & left me with this#longing feeling to start again lol#hey if you've made it this far into the tags let me just ask--would you care if i picked the blog back up?#would you also *show* that you care?#i'm actually quite curious (you could almost call me george lol)#anyway maybe we'll see each other on today-in-the-devildom again in the future.. who knows
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allylikethecat · 9 months ago
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Omg, also a TS fan since debut and I massively took a step back from her personally prior to the reputation era because of her antics and victim complex. The music will always mean so so much to me, her lyrics mean so much to me, but her actions as a person and TS™️ as an entity is just weird and greedy. I think she accrued a lot of fans when she disappeared for a while who've completely constructed a narrative in their heads of who she is and they believe it and are eating up this current era, but those who've been here a long time know how PR and image driven it is. Exhausting.
I apologize in advance I have been having way too many feelings about this whole situation and how it relates to my identity as a 28 year old woman and you are about to get an oversharing novel in response lol
Also, I guess CW: this post is about Taylor Swift and if anyone sends me any kind of hate or whatnot related to my own personal opinions and feelings I will be deleting it because I am NOT playing that game.
My Aunt bought me the Debut album CD at a concert after seeing her open for Rascal Flatts. She was like "I thought that you would like her!" and she was RIGHT Taylor Swift became my entire personality. One of my FAVORITE core memories as a child was the day Fearless came out. For some reason we didn't have school, and my Mom and I watched Taylor on the Ellen show, and then we went to Target and bought the physical CD, we then drove around town so we could listen to it together. My mom hasn't been well and that is one of my favorite memories of us together. It's silly but when you're in middle school that kind of thing is important to you. Then in high school I actually got MADE FUN OF for wearing Taylor merch and being excited about Red. BUT I loved her music and felt like she actually stood for something, so I brushed it off and continued to be a HUGE Swiftie. I had the Taylor Swift dolls, I had the perfumes, I had the LOVE LOVE LOVE bracelet, I had the sundresses from WALMART. I saw her on the Fearless and 1989 tours, I had the fucking 1989 haircut. I was supposed to go to Loverfest.
I was still a HUGE Swiftie during the post 1989-pre Reputation eras, then the Reputation era. I'm a few years younger than her, but I felt like I could relate to the kind of manic panic that she was sharing with us (lol turns out I was just unmedicated and we're doing much better now). It felt (in my probably naive mind) like she was experiencing the same insecurities that I was and reacting accordingly. Was she playing the victim at times? Oh 100% BUT I also fully believe that she thought she was one. (Plus... Kim is my least favorite Kardashian lol)
I LOVED the Lover era even as it was shit on at the for the sunshine rainbow hyper colorful aesthetic. Like, I don't know if new fans realize but when Lover was released? It was NOT as beloved as it is now. Then Folklore and Evermore were absolute genius, it felt like Taylor had grown up, and she got all of these new fans, which was great! She was in an "adult" relationship and her music and publicity choices seemed to reflect that. It was so refreshing to see a celebrity keeping their personal life, personal, and sharing what they wanted to share through music. Midnights broke all kinds of records, again, amazing! Even if it wasn't as strong as say Folklore. I fought for my life and got Eras Tour tickets (opening weekend!!) I had the BEST TIME EVER.
Taylor has always been extremely calculated with her public image. She was over exposed during The 1989 era and the public turned on her, so I truly cannot figure out why she is doing it again 100x in this new era of whatever the fuck this is. I don't know her, maybe she is legitimately happy, or maybe this is a cry for help. But I have been so grossed out by her behavior lately, and how in your face everything is with Kelce. It's no secret that I hate Kelce (and people that know me IRL know that it's not a new Taylor related thing lol) and if she actually loves him, fine, that's great for her, BUT we don't need to see it! Yes she was public when she was dating Calvin but ALSO she was what 25-26? She's a 34 year old woman now with the biggest platform of any celebrity ever. She feels too old (and this is not me age shaming her because I would be grossed out if my friends were doing it, and I would be embarrassed if *I* were to ever do it) to be licking a man's face in public like this. This feels like sorority girl in her first college relationship (I was *in* a sorority for a hot second so this isn't hate on sorority girls either!) and not record breaking Grammy award winning artist. ALSO I feel like she used to come across as so articulate and well spoken? Controversial opinion but I thought she sounded like a fucking idiot in that Time Person of the Year piece.
I think that this whole thing is PR for something, but because it just feels too icky to be real, but I don't know what it's PR for, (trying to bury the Matty situation from May? Because if so that just makes me even more sad for him or trying to get back at Joe? Which if that's the case, I feel bad for him too and she's even more immature than I thought) and now, for the first time, AFTER SIXTEEN YEARS I'm embarrassed to be a fan of her, both because of her own actions and also the actions of her fanbase as a whole.
It feels really weird, and I know I'm being parasocial about it, but when the times got bad I always had her music to fall back on and now I just, I don't know it feels cheapened somehow because the current image that's being crafted doesn't match the one that we originally fell for. And you know what, people change, she's a celebrity, I don't know her, what she does DOES NOT affect me any way, and how I feel does not AFFECT HER in the slightest, and I know it's being parasocial but I feel like a big part of me is in mourning about it. Less because of her changing her image so drastically, and more so because I feel like I'm mourning the loss of childhood and joy that used to be associated with her music for me and I think that's what's making me the most sad.
I have Eras tour tickets for one of the London dates this summer. I'm probably going to still go, because I paid for them, and I also have tickets to see Noah Kahan that same week in London (... and also the Longines tour has ALSO decided that the London stop is that week...) But I don't consider myself a "big fan" anymore. Maybe I will be one day again, but this current image that she's putting out just isn't it for me.
Sorry for the longest Taylor related novel in existence, I have had a lot of bottled up feelings about this that feel ridiculous typing out and sharing out loud BUT I know I will feel better sending them into the interwebs and your ask was the perfect catalyst.
Thank you so much for sending this in and for your continued support! I hope you continue to enjoy my fics and my secret sports hot takes 😂
❤️Ally
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babacontainsmultitudes · 8 months ago
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[just venting a bit into the void you understand you understand 😌] Lately I've been feeling very caught between "I have a lot of thoughts on Sparrow and Normal and all that with the ending and teen talk and feel like I need to get them out and voice them for my own piece of mind and resolution" and "I am lacking the strength and energy to actually sit down and write it all out and kind of really just want to fully move on to other things (AUs, fics, anything else)" but my brain can't seem to commit to either and that's quite frustrating cause it's just left me very restless. *Sigh*. Idk! Just needed to complain about that a bit ig, it's silly but this is what has been ailing me as of late.
#Then there's also a part of me that's like “does anyone even care at this point? haven't I already talked about them too much?”#but I have seen many a take that irk me...#and perhaps at the center of it all nagging at me is that persistent conflation of love and pride#Less about that in Normal's mind so much as in Will's and the fandom's 🤔#Also that reoccurring issue of the fandom going ''Normal thinks this therefore it is The Truth'' though I believe I've discussed this befor#And... Hooks Will could have grabbed onto but didn't... Quite a few of those...#And the double standard/negativity bias in fandom of ignoring that Sparrow says both that he loves and likes Normal while doodlerized#But not treating those with the same legitimacy we do the pride thing. And ignoring Sparrow's demonstrations of love and change...#And what the love wolf scene actually implies about Sparrow (as I see it) with his own explanation of the pride thing in mind#But also!!! Also on Norm's epilogue and how despite everything taken at face value (i.e. no teen talk influence) I don't actually hate it#and I think it's plenty salvageable#And gah also that like *regardless* of how things turn out with Normal and his dad-#Well I haven't listened to much of the teen talk just the directly Sparrow-relevant clips#so I don't know quite how cynical Will is or isn't about Normal's future#But like. UGH. What I'm trying to say is even if things didn't find resolution vis-a-vis his dad#(which tbh I could go either way on- it's the meta misinterpretations of Sparrow that Bother me not so much Normal's)#(Well that's complicated. Again it comes back to the love vs. pride thing gosh this is so vague of me lol)#With all the positive influences in his life (and just the fact that life is long? and therapy is a thing?) I just don't see Normal-#being Miserable for the rest of his life. Like. I mean I won't elaborate here really but damn it no he can absolutely turn out alright stil#blugh#BUT YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN THAT'S A LOT OF STUFF AND THAT'S ONLY VAGUE RAMBLINGS ABOUT *SOME* OF IT#Like I'm proud of a lot of my essay posts (which I'm hoping to eventually compile in a masterpost eventually actually) but they take a whil#And if my heart wants to do other things... Ah idk...#ANYWAYS a vent to vent a vent to vent
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