#And his bff took like one look at his depressed ass

[tiralja]

Bai Liu might be one of my fave characters of all time

[angel-of-the-moons]

Blood Moon

Marc Spector/Moon Knight (Vengeance of Venom) x Fem!Reader

TW/CW: Mentions of child death, trauma related to that, some coping, Marc being an emotionally constipated idiot as usual; Also you can't convince me that after the symbiote invasion, Marc and May Parker didn't become like, catty bff's

A/N: After a million years, I have returned to this particular incarnation of Moon Knight! I've been trying to consume various forms of media to help get me in the zone for him, and yes that includes watching the only two episodes in that Spider-Man cartoon he's actually in on repeat...

Taglist: @badbishsblog @patchesofwork

Divider done by the ever so lovely @/saradika-graphics!

PT. 6

It had been a few days since you and Marc had discussed his past.

And you were... angry for him. What had happened to your family was bad, but it wasn't as bad as Marc coming home to his dead child.

Marc had his whole family ripped away from him because his little brother literally went insane with jealousy? Honestly, if the bastard wanted superpowers so fucking badly, he could gone to play in a pool at a nuclear power plant!

Marc's lot in life truly wasn't fair. You understood his prickly, walled-off personality a bit more, but moreover you just felt... saddened. You almost didn't push through the loss of your family. Being a combative young girl, violent and opposing to your guardians as you frog-hopped your way through foster homes; many parents simply didn't bother with you after the first month of constant disobedience and violent outbursts.

And couple all of that with the running away... it had gotten to the point nobody had wanted you, so you were forced to live in a roughened group home for the duration of your dwindling childhood.

But none of that felt as horrible and gut-wrenching compared to coming home to your own child brutally murdered out of petty jealousy and perceived rivalry.

Your heart broke for him; he had suffered horrible situations all because of someone he should have been able to love and trust with his life. Someone--

"You're spacing again."

You jumped, almost dropping your gauntlet as Marc's voice cuts through your thoughts.

You cleared your throat awkwardly, "Yeah, just... Got a bit on my plate, so to speak."

His chair squeaks as he turns back to sharpening his darts; after pointing out he needed new ones, Marc actually took your advice and put in a request with Fury for the materials to manufacture new ones. And provide a few modifications to your own equipment as well. It was the least he could do for being such an ass to you before.

The grindstone whirred, soft sparks falling onto the worktable as he meticulously honed the edges of the blades down to their fine edges; his warm chocolate eyes focusing with intensity on his task.

You tucked one leg beneath yourself from where you hunched over on the couch, staring at him for a moment before returning to your own work, hoping to distract you from your morbid and depressing train of thought.

"Have anything to do with Strange?" He asked, the question short and clipped.

"Eh?" You blinked, almost dropping your tool at the suddenness of his question. It was... weirdly out of nowhere. You hadn't really interacted with Stephen much since your hospitalization, and maybe once or twice when dealing with things at Avengers Tower.

"No?"

"He's been hovering." He muttered, frowning as he began working on a new dart, setting the completed one off to the side with the others.

"You mean like... at meetings?" You blinked dumbly, your jaw slacking slightly.

"Yes."

"Well, I mean... kinda?" You rubbed the back of your neck.

"Any particular reason?" He hummed, his mouth twisting as he scowled through the magnifier.

You furrowed your brow and squinted at him, blinking a few times. He seemed... Stiff. Prickly, almost. He almost looked like he...

You grinned widely, a lightbulb blipping to life inside of your head.

"Oh my god."

You lean forward, grasping your gauntlet in one hand and still grinning, staring at his posture. Marc seemed to go even stiffer than before, his movements not as precise as before, almost as if he was trying to distract himself from the current subject.

"Marc, are you jealous?"

The silence was your best answer, and you laughed, leaning back on the couch, and kicking your feet as your giddiness overtook you. "Marc!"

Marc spun around and slammed his fist on the table, barking, "I was only wondering if there are any distractions that might screw you up on patrol!"

You finally dropped your gauntlet, clutching your belly as it ached from laughing, his absurd reaction to your observation just ratting him out more, "Oh my god!" You gasped, rolling onto your side.

"Shut the hell up!" He snapped.

"Marc!" You sputtered, snorting at him.

"Ugh!" He grunted, jerking his chair back around to look at the task he'd dropped on the worktable.

"Stephen has been like, nosey because I was thinking about asking Fury to transfer me as his partner."

His shoulders twitched, "What?"

You sit up again a bit, resting your weight on your elbow as you let your leg sling over the side of the couch; "When we split our little dynamic duo; before I got hurt, I requested I work with Stephen because... Well? We have decent chemistry and ideally that's what you want in a partnership."

Marc scowled, keeping his back to you as you spoke; why was he so defensive over this? Why did that hot, simmering feeling return to the pit of his gut? He thought he buried it the day he saw you in the medical ward back in the Tower when you agreed to be his partner again.

"And as for the weird ass flowers? Gamora and Groot gave those to me. She popped in to say hi, and Groot happened to sprout some while we were talking. They gave them to me as a get-well present."

He looked at you out of the corner of his eyes, over his shoulder, "You certainly enjoyed his attention, though."

You coughed awkwardly into your hand, and cleared your throat; "Well, a woman appreciates chivalry every now and again, Marc. And Stephen can be really chivalrous when he wants to be."

You crossed your arms, and huffed out a puff of air. "And your manners certainly match the sewers you were living in... But it's no reason to get friggin' jealous or anything."

"I'm not jealous for the last damn time!" He snapped again, glaring at you.

"Oh... so you're protective, then? Are you that worried about me?"

He growled, grinding his teeth together as he pushed himself up from the table, the wheels on his chair squeaking audibly as he muttered under his breath.

"Hey! Where are you going?" You asked, climbing to your feet as he yanked on his hoodie.

"Out for a drink. I need one after dealing with you." He scoffed, walking up the basement stairs.

"But it's 11 in the morning!" You retort.

Even though he seemed pissed, you couldn't help but smile to yourself, your fingers touching your chin as you heard the front door slam.

"She's insufferable!" Marc growled, scowling deeply out of the window, his brown eyes watching as children played outside and cars drove by. The muffled barking of a dog could be heard from somewhere through the window.

"I swear, dealing with her has me wanting to shave my head and jump in the Hudson in the middle of winter!"

May smiled into her tea, her green eyes twinkling with mischief as the wrinkles at the corners became more obvious the more Marc ranted about you.

"Your tea is getting cold." She reminded him with a hum.

The former Marine slumped his shoulders with a hefty sigh and dropped onto the cushioned chair on the other side of the tea table next to her, taking the chipped mug in his hands before taking a big swig of it; swirling the slightly bitter liquid around in his mouth before swallowing.

"You've been talking about your partner for a while, Marc. And while you seem agitated about her," May set her mug down on a saucer to look at him with a patient smile.

"Has she really done anything to make you this angry? Or is there some other underlying issue?"

His brows furrowed and he rubbed his hand along his stubble, looking at her quizzically, "I don't follow."

"Marc, you're not used to having to rely on someone in such a hefty capacity like this," May said gently.

"You've been working alone for so long you've boxed yourself into a little corner and get mad when people don't act the way you want them to, or if they don't see things the way you do, at first. It's why you acted the way that you did when all those symbiotes invaded."

"Okay, I have my reasons for..." Marc noticed her silvery brow quirk up, her lips tipping into a smirk. He brought his tea to his lips and drank again. "...continue."

"You were concerned with your own survival. You had been alone for so long you felt like, even with your hero work as Moon Knight, you were still in it by yourself."

"...Someone helped convince me." He sighed softly, looking into the tea a bit, swirling it in the mug.

"Oh yeah, someone did all right." May said haughtily, "And I bet she was so smart and amazing at it, too."

"And a little full of herself. And preachy..." Marc slowly smiled at her.

"Okay, well, aside from that--" May giggled. "It's nice to know that I had a hand in you opening up more. Spider-Man being that other hand."

Marc pursed his lips. May Parker may know that Marc Spector is actually Moon Knight... But she did not know her beloved nephew was the Spider-Man. He didn't like lying to her, it left a foul taste in his mouth. She was one of the few--the very few--friends he had left in the world and it felt wrong to mislead her.

But he swore to Peter he wouldn't tell May until the youth decided he was ready.

"So, I think your apparent "frustration" with her might just be the fact that you're not used to having someone inhabit your personal bubble so easily. Your personalities are very different, but... You like her. It angers you because you try not to like her--or people in general--but it just happened."

"That's not..." Marc started to say; but, instead he rubbed the back of his neck. "...Entirely untrue."

"And you seem to be unreasonably annoyed that this girl had been looking for a new partner... And seemed to enjoy whatever flattery he was putting on for her."

He raised an eyebrow, "And?"

"Marc, did you stop to analyze your feelings on a slightly more... intimate manner?" May sighed hopelessly, shaking her head before taking another sip of her tea.

"Uh--hey, wait! What's that supposed to mean!" He sputtered, turning in the chair to look at her fully, feeling an uncomfortable sweat in his palms.

"Do you think you might be so protective of her because you're interested in her on a more personal level? You know, romantically. Or... otherwise."

Ugh, he hated how sagely this woman could be sometimes. She was wonderful at giving advice, but torture when she got to the core of the issues discussed.

And he knew, deep down, that she wasn't far off from the truth.

"May--"

"Marc." She put her hand on his arm, giving him a gentle squeeze, "Would it be so bad to let somebody in like that? To let her get close to you?"

He squeezed his eyes shut and determinedly sucked the rest of his tea down before speaking;

"Yes. May, I'm taking a big risk just even being friends with you. Being around your nephew."

"Is it... because of your hero work?" May asked, her eyes shining with concern.

"Yes and no... it's..." His eyes cast down to the floor, the bitter memories of what happened to his wife and daughter, his friends, associates... all at the hands of his brother.

"There's someone. A criminal who--who has it out for me. He's been targeting people close to me for years, May. I... don't want him to hurt anybody else."

She squeezed his arm again, smiling kindly, "Tell me. Please. You know you can."

"It's... not pretty, May. It's horrific, what he's done. She found out about it and I'm pretty sure she's started letting it fester in her brain." He sighed, slumping his shoulders a bit.

"I've seen a lot, Marc." May says softly. "After losing Ben, how he was taken from us... it wasn't easy. You know how I felt, I've already told you. So... Please."

Marc lifted his eyes and took a deep breath.

And began to speak.

PT. 7: No idea, with fall around the corner I may come back to this just for the spooky vibes and to hopefully be able to wrap this up!

[hot-girls-corner]

hurts so much that it's funny. - 15th August, 2023

good morning. i skipped two days of writing to be precise. why?

it's because too much was going on. 13th aug was fine

yesterday there was earthquake of around 5.2. the whole building got down, especially the ones living the upper part of the building cuz we wouldn't have much time to survive.

that was number 1 reason.

secondly, mom found out that i text people on messenger and also saw me sent out some pictures.

to be precise some VERY DECENT pictures, like just my face. and the chat history? FULLY DECENT DAMN NICE chat history. still i got like a "ultimate warning" from my parents and they also made me deactivate my acc and block the guys b4 doing that. i felt super bad for them. cuz

i'm ahanaf's only bff and he has no one else to talk about everything so openly… we were also planning to research on the scholarships and go together… i couldn't even tell him that my parents are making me do this… but i had to cutoff everything… he was inspired by me, he was one of the people who truly cared for me, and i was one of them for him. he's now gonna think i left him like his other friends too :(

on the other hand, tousif is also an introvert + he is a totally broken guy. domestic violence, no real friends, people stepping over him, what not? that guy found his safe place with me, i took care of him while he was depressed and got him out of it. i helped him continue his friendship with others. when no one was there to support him, i was there… he was very grateful to me, he also wanted me to share my pain, but i never did except once cuz i don't wanna hurt him. he didn't like it when i didn't share my pain. he sometimes wouldn't even believe that i was not in pain cuz he knows i'm too good at acting and hiding emotions. so blocking him and breaking contact like that is gonna go too harsh on him as i won't be returning for a few months now. and even when i do, i won't be able to talk to any boy or enter any group. only girls, that even of my own school… poor him… he's gonna think i ghosted him too :(

truly as a psychopath, it's not like i feel any pain to leave them, or any remorse after my parents' lecture. cuz according to them, i did so many "wrong" things, just by talking and sending the most decent pictures possible. but i know that's not the case, and the only thing is i shouldn't have sent pictures as he's not in my school. that's it. so no, i don't feel any regret.

also i didn't have to leave ANYTHING tbh. i think dad understands that, according to him (i think) i was ABOUT TO get on the wrong track but they came in just at the right time to stop me lol. that's why i don't think he thinks that i've done any other shit.

but let's talk about mom now 💀☕

she's thinking i've done some huge ass cyber crime by just talking to boys and i'm the most evil spoiled kid to ever exist and i haven't fixed myself after that incident. and that my whole life is gonna be ruined and blah blah blah what not 💀☕

like WHA- bro even my lil brother who is probably the most annoying kid on the planet in my opinion ALSO KNOWS THAT I AM FUCKING NICE NOW. i'm also the fav of two teachers and liked by other teachers (except that nurjahan shit, she's got personal problems with me cuz of my beauty 💅)

look. my life is ABSOLUTELY FINE. i just need to become a topper again. that's what's left. nothing else 🤷‍♀️

i have a job, i am pretty, i am popular, i am liked and on top of all, i'm charming and i am the CHARMER.

now if i become a topper again, then my life will be almost back on track. then my goal would be to be one of the toppers in Dhaka BOARD. although i know they won't be satisfied anyways but idc anymore. i'll just do what i'm satisfied with.

and i am definitely NOT satisfied with the results i've been getting, like bro wtf is this?

i can't just FAIL. i was THE topper once. now i've lost my ranking since class 9.

i have to make history now to be THE SENSATION.

EVERYONE will see me achieving EVERYTHING in life. i'll have a nice job, a good income, a great life, the best life partner 💅

like i'll show u guys what i'm worth bitches. anyone who underestimated me is gonna REGRET.

tomorrow is my exam, so if i didn't write all this and didn't vent out, i would be fucking hyperventilating starting from now till the day i get exam results 💀

now it feels lighter, at least i know my thoughts are expressed, maybe not to someone, but to a diary. to just write how i feel. because i have no one to talk to now. but that doesn't make me sad cuz i'm an introvert 🗿🗿🗿

i should start studying now, i got a ton to study. it's bengali exam anyways.

bai bai ^_^

---

i've been overhydrating for like 2 year now, and i think now the symptoms are finally noticeable to me and is actually affecting me, according to my weight i'm only supposed to drink a liter everyday, where i drink a MINIMUM of 4 liters. this has been happening for like 2 years now and the symptoms were so light i never even noticed, nowadays i drink even more than 6 liters i think and i'm totally having headaches, high blood pressure and everything. now i really need to survive this or this is gonna end up VERY serious. my head is kinda spinning even when i'm writing this…

---

it's been like 6 hours and i still feel the same… so light-headed, dizzy and tired… tomorrow is my exam… is this really what had to happen today??? i haven't even started studying 😭😭😭

if i don't recover today, my exam will NOT go as planned and i can't get good marks 😭💔

please Allah do something… i actually feel really bad for not being able to study the day before exam…

let me start working… i have no other choice… i can't just lay around all day and night… but i need to recover fast too… i DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO

---

ok so it's 8 pm now and i'm totally fine, full of energy (thanks to ben and skz)

now i can finish my work happily and study!

---

i suddenly feel so empty, as if there's a void in me that just sucked everything.

tomorrow is my first model test, so i should be very nervous. but i am not. i should be studying. but i am not. i should be stressed. but i am not. i should be focusing. but i am not.

i'm procrastinating, and i know it's bad and will make me end up like before, but for some reason i still can't start… only 30 minutes left till 12 am and i got no shit done.

uhhhhhh what do i do now?

meh lemme just fresh up and speedrun the readings…

---

bad night

[octoberobserver]

There's Something About Eddie

(Read on ao3)

"Hey Rich, what time are we—holy shit.”

Richie Tozier slammed his laptop lid closed, bug-eyed, mouth hung open wide enough to catch flies. 

“I wasn’t—it isn’t—it’s porn!”

“Really?” Eddie Kaspbrak asked with a wry smirk, arms folding across his chest as he shuffled further into the kitchen clad in his boxers and one of Richie’s sleep-shirts, “‘Cause it looked like Love, Actually.”

A flush spread from Richie’s chest up to dot along his cheeks as his eyes trailed slowly up Eddie's body, drinking him in. 

“It’s...research.” 

Eddie blinked. 

“Research.”

Richie pushed himself away from the table and darted towards the coffee machine. 

“Y-Yeah, y’know,” he cleared his throat, “it’s...it’s our first Valentine’s Day and—”

“Love, Actually is a Christmas movie though,” Eddie couldn’t help but interject, enjoying his boyfriend’s noticeable embarrassment way too much, “And kinda sad and depressing sometimes.”

Richie whirled around, his 'You’re a Dick, but you’re my Dick' mug in hand. 

“Love, Actually taught me everything I ever needed to know about love, Eds. I mean,” he waved his free hand, “is it technically a Christmas movie? Sure. Does it have a creepy stalker storyline where Rick from The Walking Dead wants to bang his BFF’s way-younger wife? Definitely. But, god, when Emma Thompson opens that Joni Mitchell CD? That’s poetic cinema, Eds. ACTING!”

Eddie tilted his head. 

"And what has that taught you exactly? That Joni Mitchell is the perfect gift when you wanna cheat? Should I expect a gift-wrapped copy of—”

Richie gave an indignant squawk, sloshing coffee all over the counter and his hand. 

"Shit, shit, fuck," he grumbled, grabbing paper-towels and wincing over his shoulder. 

"Absolutely not the point I was trying to make, Spagheds. Like I would ever cheat on your sexy, little ass after pining over it for thirty years.”

Eddie rolled his eyes, grabbing the surface-cleaner from under the sink and spraying it over the coffee stain. 

"Damn straight." 

Richie hip checks him. 

"Nothing we do is straight, Kaspbrak." 

Eddie tutted, taking the mug from Richie, putting it down on the counter and clasping his hands, leading him over to the sink. 

"I can't believe Trashmouth Tozier is a closet rom-com fan." 

Richie snorted, watching transfixed as water cascaded down their joined hands, his skin an angry red in contrast to Eddie's dusty tan. 

"I was a closet lot-of-things, Eds. Can you blame me for loving a happy ending?"

Eddie turned his hands over, their fingers brushing under the water.

"On a scale of one to ten, how bad do you wanna make the obvious joke?" 

"Solid 9.5." 

Eddie shut off the water, grabbing the hand towel off the rack to dry his own hands, before flinging it at Richie's face. 

"I've never liked rom-coms. They're unrealistic."

Richie pulled the towel off his head, snorting.

"You don't watch When Harry Met Sally for the realism, Eds. That's like watching Magic Mike for the intricate exploration of dance." 

"So why watch it then?"

"Channing Tatum's abs." 

"I meant When Harry Met Sally, dickwad." 

"Billy Crystal's abs." 

Eddie gave a pained chuckle, lightly shoving Richie. 

Richie took that opportunity to grab his hand, pulling him gently against him, wrapping his arms around his waist as he stared down at him with a small, private smile.

"I used to watch rom-coms to remind me that love does exist. That...that anyone can find love. Even the quirky, career-woman that is on a first-name basis with her takeout place.” 

‘And lonely comedians down on their luck’ went unsaid, but still heard by both men. 

Eddie quirked an eyebrow.

“So basically Meg Ryan in everything.”

“Exactly.” 

Richie leaned down as Eddie leaned up, nibbling on his bottom lip. The latter hummed into the kiss, running his hands up to rest on Richie’s shoulders, squeezing tightly, Eddie’s own ‘I’m allergic 2 mornings’ t-shirt (that Richie had snatched up off the floor where it had been discarded during some sleepy sex the night before) stretching under his fists. 

“But now...” Richie breathed out as the kiss broke, his eyes still closed, “I watch rom-coms to remind myself just how much better I have it than Meg Ryan, Sandy Bullock or Katherine Heigl.” 

Eddie swept his thumb across Richie’s face, pressing their foreheads together, before cupping Richie’s neck and pulling him back down.

They both stumbled against the kitchen counter as Eddie’s tongue traced Richie's bottom lip. The taller man groaned, opening his mouth to deepen the kiss, sliding his hands down Eddie’s bare thighs and hoisting him up to sit beside the sink.

“Un...sanitary,” Eddie gasped in weak protest before diving back in, still clutching the hairs at the nape of his neck tightly in his hand and wrenching him closer. 

Richie slammed his palms onto the counter, either side of Eddie’s thighs as he broke the kiss, sucking and biting along his boyfriend’s throat. 

“No hickeys, Rich,” Eddie warned before letting out a groan, tipping his head back to give him better access despite his words, “no way I’m letting...Stan point them out in front of everybody.” 

Richie hummed, the vibration making Eddie shudder as he lapped along the skin that was marred by fresh goosebumps. 

“Remind me again why we're...spending our first Valentine's Day as a couple with the Losers?” 

Eddie’s head thumped back against the kitchen cabinet, his breath hitching as Richie’s teeth lightly scraped against his collarbone that was exposed from underneath the too-large shirt. 

“B-Because five of seven of us are in town, as well as Don and Adrian, and that never happens,” he struggled to reply as Richie’s hand trailed just above the waistband of his boxers, his fingers brushing against the line of hair above his navel. 

“Rich, we have to leave in like an hour,” he lightly scolded, mostly for show as he hooked his ankles around the back of his boyfriend’s thighs, pulling him even closer, winding his fingers around more of his hair and tugging.

Richie gasped.

“Q-Quickie it is, then,” he murmured against Eddie’s mouth, cupping him through the material.

“Fuck,” Eddie hissed, warmth pooling in the pit of his stomach as Richie gave him a firm squeeze. 

“Later, Spagheds, we have to leave in like an hour,” Richie parroted, sounding far too smug, “and I'll need a hell of a lot longer to take you apar—” 

Eddie tugged him into a bruising kiss, cutting off his smarmy response.

“S-Shit, Eds,” Richie gasped, his glasses askew from Eddie’s ministrations, holding his arms up for him to pull off his T-shirt and fling it across the room. Before he could remark on the ‘mess’ Eddie was making, Richie moaned, loudly, as his boyfriend’s mouth latched onto his nipple, running his tongue along the risened nub.  

“So what...would our rom-com be called then?” Eddie mumbled, lifting off one nipple to lavish attention on the other as Richie arched his back, “‘When Richie Met Eddie?’ ‘Richie Tozier’s Diary?’”

Richie snorted, “More like, ‘Eds and Richie Make A Porno.’ Or, ‘Forgetting and then Remembering Eddie Kaspbrak.’ Or, ‘The 41-Year-Old Vir—oh wait, no. That doesn’t apply anymore.” 

Eddie bit a little harder than usual on Richie’s left nipple (knowing it to be the most sensitive), causing him to hiss in a mixture of both pleasure and pain, his preferred ‘sweet-spot.’

Eddie leaned back, catching his eye, “Ha, ha. Hilarious. I did sleep with other people before you, you know.” 

A grand total of two. But that didn’t need mentioning.

Richie quirked an eyebrow, “Sure, Eds. But I mean, it’s not like your magic number will be rising any time soon, so it’s—”

“Until I get you a Joni Mitchell CD for Christmas, of course.” 

Richie’s mouth dropped open.

“And Eddie gets off a good one! Ow! Right in the heart!”

He pressed a hand to his chest as if he had been shot.

Eddie rolled his eyes, but teasingly rubbed his thumb right over the nipple he had been just nibbling on, Richie jumping in response. 

“Only we could joke about cheating in the middle of foolin’ around on what is supposed to be the most romantic day of the year,” he chuckled, leaning forward to pepper Richie’s jaw with kisses in silent apology.

Richie brushed the front of his boxers tantalizingly soft one last time before gripping his waist and lifting him off the counter, planting him firmly on the floor and pressing himself against him, eyes fond.

“We’re weirdos, Eddie. Losers. Always have been. Wouldn’t have it any other way.” 

“You’re a sap.” 

Richie pressed harder, their erections lining up, hard and hot through their clothes.

“Yeah. But you like me anyway.”

Eddie bit his lip, stifling a moan. Reaching out blindly, he rummaged in the drawer to his left before emerging victorious with a familiar little bottle.

Richie tilted his head, eyeing the travel-sized lube.

“What?” Eddie asked, eyebrows raised, “Kitchen sex has apparently become a thing, Tozier. Despite my many, many arguments about hygiene. So...I’m just coming prepared.” 

“Hmm. And soon you’ll be just coming,” Richie winked.

A wrinkle formed in between Eddie’s eyebrows.

“Not a day goes by where I’m not amazed that you’re a professional comedian.”

Richie merely shrugged, snatching the bottle from him and squeezing a healthy amount into his palm, smirking, “I know, it’s baffling. And I’ll admit, I can’t argue with your logic, Eds.”

Without another word, he quickly tugged Eddie’s boxers down and wrapped his hand around his boyfriend’s dick, squeezing.

“F-Fuck, Rich,” Eddie gasped, his head falling forward, onto Richie’s shoulder. 

“Again, maybe later, we’re on a time crunch here,”  Richie grinned, brushing his thumb across the head, gathering the beads of precum already beginning to pool there.

“Nngh,” Eddie grumbled unintelligently, scrambling at Richie’s sweatpants, tugging at the drawstring. 

“Off, off, want to...feel you.”

Richie, always so ready to give Eddie anything his heart desired, hurriedly helped him shove down the two layers of offending clothing, his hard cock soon freed to bob up towards his stomach. 

Eddie, (who had used that time to slather his own hand in lube,) reached for it eagerly, closing his fingers around the base and edging it closer to Richie’s pumping fist. 

“Together.” 

Their eyes met, Richie rolling his lip between his teeth as he opened up his large palm, closing it over Eddie’s hand on his own cock. They both let out a groan as their skin slid together. They set a brutal pace, pumping their fists rhymically in between snatched, frantic kisses.

The countertop dug into Eddie’s back as Richie crowded him against it, licking into his mouth, his free hand clutching his hip tightly as nothing but the sound of slapping skin and their labored breaths filled the kitchen. 

“Eds, Eds I...I’m gonna—” Richie croaked into the half-inch between their lips, as he felt his orgasm starting to build, bubbling hot in his abdomen. 

“Me too,” Eddie gasped in reply, they both picking up speed and Richie adding in a slight twist to his wrist, just like they both liked that proved to be their undoing. 

“Fuck!”

“Shit!”

They sagged back against the kitchen counter as they came within seconds of one another, their come mixing and painting their fingers in a way that had Eddie’s nose scrunching. 

Richie blindingly reached out with his clean hand and nabbed the towel that he had thrown down, hastily wiping them off.

“Rich, not the hand towel, there’s wipes in the—Jesus!” Eddie scolded far too late as the slightly coarse material ran over his sensitive cock gently.

“It’s my turn to do laundry, Eddie, I got it.” 

With that, Richie gave the towel a half-hearted throw towards the laundry room. 

They both watched as it landed with a heavy splat on the tiled, kitchen floor. 

Richie cringed, slowly turning back to look at Eddie who was gaping at him, eyes glinting.

“You’re absolutely disgusting, Trashmouth. I honestly cannot believe I love you, sometimes.” 

“Trust me, Eds. I can’t believe it either,” he murmured, tone laced with raw honesty, taking it upon himself to pull Eddie’s boxers back up before fixing himself. 

Eddie rolled his eyes, pecking his lips before plodding over and picking up the soiled towel between his thumb and index finger with disgust. 

Richie watched him go, a familiar warmth flooding his chest. 

“Hey, hey, Spagheds...I got it. I know what the title of our rom-com is,” he called after him.

“Please tell me it’s different to our sex tape,” Eddie’s voice wafted in from the laundry room, “‘cause I’m pretty sure ‘Eddie Got Fingered’ isn’t romantic, even if it is acc—”

“There’s Something About Eddie.”

A beat of silence followed his words. 

Two beats. 

Eddie’s head appeared from around the door.

“Really? The jizz in the hair movie?”

“Yep.”

Eddie frowned.

“And what is there about me, exactly?”

Richie smiled.

“Something. Everything. I've never quite figured out what and I like it that way. Love it, even." 

Their eyes met.

“And I love you, Richie, even if you do throw jizz-covered towels all over the house,” Eddie replied quietly as he walked back into the room, blush flushing his cheeks, he still not quite used to saying the words out loud, even though he had expressed them in a myriad of different ways every single day for the last six months.

And twenty-nine years. 

Richie grabbed his hand, squeezing it gently.

“I love you, Eddie Spaghetti. And you know what they say about true love—it lasts a lifetime.”

Eddie squinted up at him.

“Why do I have a feeling that’s a line from a movie?” 

Richie winked. 

“Gotta represent my girl Emma Thompson on Valentine’s Day, Eduardo.” 

“It’s a fucking Christmas movie, Richard!”

(More Reddie fics here)

[my-wayward-son]

I’m not usually one for memories, but timehop caught me on this one. Four years ago, I was babysitting my parents’ cat. I love that cat with all my heart.

The flannel shirt I’m wearing in the photo is the same flannel shirt I was wearing the day I ran away to be with DD (January 2019). It’s also the shirt that matches one of JW’s (Mr. BFF and coworker from where I used to live) favorite ties, and we used to arrange to coordinate, just to be silly.

By October 2018, I’d already had this blog going for over a year. I’d had Starbucks Sunday going for about a year. My big writing project that month was “Are You with me after all,” an Irondad & Spiderson story delving into the personal and the political as the media swelled with the Me Too movement.

The following month, I experienced my first status migraine, yet I put every spare minute into writing, completing both the Novemeto challenge and NaNo, with 30 one-shots, a 70k word book, and a 90k total.

That is not bragging. That is not me begging for sympathy. That was me, four years ago, being a stupid twenty-five-year-old, experiencing the onset of fairly severe Bipolar disorder, using lack of situational awareness (blame autism a little, my selfish ass a lot) to my advantage, and caring only about my statics.

Riding mania is not equal to more productivity.

Riding depression is not equal to resting.

Abusing (OTC) drugs does not put the body back into a “regular” schedule. Taking something to sleep, then taking something to wake up, then living on protein powder and instant coffee because food is a waste of time… it’s not sustainable.

Sometimes crutches are needed. The same with time-outs. Float for a while and let the anxious fizzle out somewhere else in the brain, somewhere under the soft lights and music.

Same with activity. DD is immensely strong, and she has actually carried me outside to sit on the back porch. I like to test the weather report. Look at the app. Then I go to the nearest window to see if it’s right. My kid likes to help. But it’s good just to move. To make a thought that’s unrelated to you. Geez, the sun is bright. Shit, it’s raining again…

Now, I’m not telling anyone what to do. I don’t know how to manage or cure any mental illness. I can just pass on descriptions of what happened to me at my lowest points, and explain what went wrong. It’s like… a police investigation, sort of. Now that I have proper medication and a support system and doctors who look after me, we can look back on my behavior and thoughts and what I was doing four years ago so we know how I derailed and how to prevent it from happening again.

I’m not fixed. Not cured. That’s impossible, unfortunately. It’s hard to manage constantly fluctuating mental health with a migraine condition and metabolic and gastric issues as well. Sometimes it’s hard to tell them all apart and treat the correct problem. I’m so lucky to have DD and our children and our roommates for their consistent love and care. Nothing gets easier, but it is better.

Four years ago I was an idiot about to crash and burn, but, the moment I took this photo, I didn’t know that yet. I was just doing whatever I wanted to do, whenever I wanted to do it. Because I thought I thought I could. Drink my parents’ beer and work on Inktober and tap away on my computer and hang out with the world’s loveliest orange tabby.

Take the chances when you can. Do what you want. But learn, too. I would say listen to your body, but reality is that we also have to learn to care for bodies that don’t speak up. Take care of your loved ones. Let them show you how to take care of you.

My parents’ cat gets wet food in the morning and evening, and his dry kibble and water bowl are filled as needed. Scoop the litter box daily. Let him sleep in the bed with you.

Caring for people is not that simple. But learning the basics is a good, solid start.

[saanphoenix]

“Why do so many old-school FFVII fans think that Cloud took Zack’s memories?”

Alright, so first things first. We gotta start from the beginning. We gotta start with Jenova.

Jenova is the name given to the alien entity known as the Calamity. “Heaven’s dark harbinger.” This being, assumed to be female because of the body she was in at the Crater, was basically godlike in her natural abilities. Historically, she was able to shapeshift. She was telepathic. She had a nigh indomitable will. And she used her abilities to infect the race of human(oid)s that happened upon her crash site--the Cetra.

Now, Ifalna, within the English translation of the OG, states that Jenova turned the Cetra into monsters, nearly wiping them all out, and that the wee few that remained basically had to be sacrificed to seal Jenova away before she could do anymore damage to all life on the planet. The notes Sephiroth finds within the Shinra Mansion seem to corroborate this version of events, as he tells Zack that the Cetra chose to fight the Calamity while the other humans “hid”, thus being spared Jenova’s shenanigans, allowing them to become the dominant race on the planet, but ultimately being cowards unworthy to be the shepherds of any star, to quote Emet-Selch from FFXIV. Stay with me now.

We also know that the notes Sephiroth reads within the Shinra Mansion do not, in any way, call Jenova the Calamity. They still refer to her as a Cetra. Meaning that those notes are outdated, before the discovery of a living Cetra, a Cetra who is 2000 years removed from her own people’s history. Right? So.

(’Ah, but what about Genesis point-blank telling Sephiroth the truth? He knew what was up!’ Yes, because Hollander and Hojo found out from Gast’s recordings, and Ifalna herself, what Jenova actually was, and then Hollander told Genesis, who then said some stupid ass shit to trigger Sephiroth into looking into the wrong information, and now Nibelheim is not Nibelheim anymore and Cloud is missing one more family member than he was when he joined Shinra. Also, fuck Genesis. Anyway.)

HOJO, yeah? Hojo, in two separate novels written by Nojima himself, states to Aerith and Tseng separately that Jenova 1) will inevitably infect all life on the planet with her “cells” because of the very nature of the Lifestream and 2) turned the Cetra against each other via subtle manipulation and illusions of their loved ones, dead or alive, conceived from their own memories. She didn’t show up looking like the Eldritch horror with the eyeball nipple, she showed up looking like a run-of-the-mill Cetra. And she would further disguise herself as people a Cetra knew in order to gain their trust. And then, after she had gained that trust, she would say shit like, “Hey. Your friend over there hates you,” or, “Hey. Your friend over there wants to kill you.” And thus the Cetra, at the very least morally but probably also physically, became monsters and tore themselves apart.

You ever wonder why everything the Cetra had was booby-trapped and hidden behind riddles and self-sacrificial bullshit like their Temple? My guess is because Jenova made it so they couldn’t trust anyone, even themselves.

“Why did I read all that? What does that have to do with Cloud voring Zack’s memories?”

Because we gotta understand the mechanics of this bitch first so that we know what to look out for.

Now, we have an alien in stasis--presumed dead but definitely not--and a buncha scientists who really want a coveted spot sucking President Shinra’s dick as head of the Science Dept. who all think that taking the genetic material of a Cetra and splicing it into a modern-day human’s DNA will give them a Geiger counter to the Promised Land. Which they want to use as fuel because only some of them really understand what mako is and the others are just fucking stupid. Anyway, my guess is that they archeology their way to Jenova’s still-kinda-alive corpse and do some DNA testing and go, “Ah! We’ve found a Cetra. It has to be one! She’s by the crater, after all, and that’s where some of them were nuked by a Meteor! :) We’re geniuses!” And Jenova, in the Lifestream, went, “GOTCHA, BITCH!”

And through the power of dino DNA, out pops a lot of nonviable lifeforms, some monsters, and, eventually, a relatively normal kid with a flare for the dramatic who will become wholly obsessed with apples and very boring literature that he will insist on repeating every five goddamn seconds. As he was no Geiger counter to the Promised Land, out pops another relatively normal kid who will grow up to have dreams, and honor, and steal food from his neighbors because he was so damn honorable that he just could not ask for a handout.

With Hollander and Gillian’s experiments not producing anything of note other than children that need love and support, Hojo and Lucrecia decide to take a slightly different sample of Jenova’s cells and just start sticking them everywhere. They’re in Lucrecia. They’re in Lucrecia’s fetus. And...something strange starts to happen.

Lucrecia starts to feel the effects of Jenova. Lucrecia’s mind and body start to kind of deteriorate. Not the way that Genesis’ and Angeal’s do later on, but she is plagued by shit like severe depression and fatigue. She falls out on the floor multiple times. Her bodyguard is a little late on pulling the trigger of the gun aimed at her husband and, instead of doing anything productive about her husband proving he’s an amoral murderous fuckhead, she just decides to play doll with her kinda undead bodyguard, get even sicker, and then, finally, pops out a very strange looking baby. In fact, he looks a little alien.

“No, seriously, what does this have to do with anything?”

Genetics. How Jenova cells work. Whatever clump of cells they injected into Lucrecia, clearly different from those used in Project G, seemed to focus more on the mental fuckery aspect of Jenova than the physical, shapeshifting aspect of Jenova. I would also argue that one of the reasons Lucrecia was so adversely affected by the cells and Gillian was not is their mental well-being. Gillian, even when we meet her, seems very upbeat and doing pretty okay despite her husband having died from exhaustion a coupla years back. Lucrecia was depressed and very subservient even before she married Hojo. Losing her mentor--Vincent’s father--probably exacerbated that. And, later in Advent Children, that sort of mentality--hopelessness and despair--is what Sephiroth’s Geostigma feeds off of. That and thoughts of death/dying. But that is more speculation than anything.

So, Sephiroth’s cells are different from Genesis’ and Angeal’s, and they were all three bred differently, but they’re all kinda chimeras of Jenova’s. And once Genesis learns about his origins, it’s like the lightbulb goes off. This guy’s creating clones by infecting his 2nd and 3rd Class SOLDIERs with his own cells. And when he does that, their physical appearance becomes his own. As does their will. Whatever Genesis wants, the clones also want. And then he just grows a wing for shits and giggles. Once he tells his BFF Angeal the sitch, behold! He’s got monster clones--maybe because he realizes how fucked up overwriting a human being with yourself is--and wings, too. ...Why?

The power to do all of this shit was always there. It was genetically always there. They just had to be made aware of it, to have the puzzle piece put into place. When Sephiroth dies, that puzzle piece is put into place. And then he starts fuckin’ with shit. And turns into monstrous angels. And then dies again. And then comes back and finally grows himself his own wing. He did it, fellas. He’s a big boy now.

But we’re not here to talk about Sephiroth--ignore how much I talked about Sephiroth and his mommies previously--we’re here to talk about ZACK and CLOUD.

“What’s up with Zack and Cloud?”

First, what we must realize is that even though Hojo says that both Zack and Cloud are failed clones because they 1) didn’t take on any physical characteristics of Sephiroth, 2) didn’t seem controlled by Jenova (or Sephiroth) and, 3) didn’t exhibit the other signs of a Reunion impulse like the other clones in Nibelheim that does not mean that Sephiroth’s cells, Jenova’s cells, are not working on them.

As we’ve observed in other 1sts, abilities do not always manifest immediately or even noticeably. Clearly, Sephiroth’s physical appearance is a bit of a hint, but Genesis and Angeal look pretty damn normal and, if it weren’t for their mako injections, they probably wouldn’t be showing that much of an increase in physical capabilities. Theoretically. Maybe 10-year-old Angeal had biceps the size of a man’s head. I mean. Pff.

Zack’s tolerance to Jenova was strong due to his previous exposure in the SOLDIER program. Cloud’s mind broke pretty early on. Neither of these results matter to the fact that they both now have Sephiroth’s cells within them--just as Genesis’ and Angeal’s clones had theirs--and that their very wills are now going to be affected by Sephiroth’s. But they are also going to be a little bit like him in terms of power.

Zack’s hair, when ingested by a Genesis clone, a clone of a Type-G SOLDIER, transforms that clone into a monster. Zack doesn’t even have to do anything. The Jenova/Sephiroth cells within his body can just Do That, cause that change in another life form, of their own accord. I’m honestly shocked that, whenever they gave Zack these S-cells, HE didn’t turn into a monster. But that’s neither here nor there. I wanna talk about Cloud.

Cloud has mako poisoning, which the Remake describes as his spirit/soul being stuck between his body and the Lifestream. Weird. Anyway, he’s not fully aware of his surroundings at all times, and he clearly can’t control his body that much. He somehow has the ability to kinda get his feet shuffling, and I’m going to go on a limb and say he can chew whatever food Zack gives him, but most of the time, he’s a puppet with cut strings.

But he is also still recovering from a mind break caused by Jenova cells. The same cells that are just chilling in his body, like they are in Zack’s. And all the months Zack is dragging his ass across a continent, an ocean, and another continent, they and Cloud are listening to whatever the fuck Zack is saying. Cloud is also constantly in physical contact with Zack.

In The Kids Are Alright: A Turks Side Story, Kadaj has the power to not only read surface thoughts and memories just by being near someone, but he can also read deeper ones by making physical contact with someone. Because Jenova. And Sephiroth, whose cells Cloud and Zack have, in the OG demonstrates that he, too, can glean thoughts and memories from others. Because Jenova.

If this power is a genetic trait, as it is with Genesis and Angeal, then, sitting pretty underneath their skin, Zack and Cloud have this ability. Dormant. Snoozing. Kinda like the 1st Class Trio’s wings.

But Zack has a high tolerance and a high ignorance to Jenova and just what he might be capable of. Cloud’s mind is floating in and out at best. He’s not in control of himself. And when you have a situation like that, it is very, very easy to come to the conclusion that Cloud’s Jenova cells are passively absorbing the memories of Zack’s time in Nibelheim. That they are knitting these memories together with what little remain in Cloud’s head. That when Tifa comes across Cloud at the train station and calls him by name and remembers who he is that Cloud’s Jenova cells latch onto those memories in Tifa--as Sephiroth tells them they did--and they knit those memories with Zack’s and Cloud’s and the end result is the man we get at the beginning of the OG.

Because Cloud has visual memory of shit he never saw. It’s not just a visual medium telling a visual story. You wanna know how I know that for a fact? Because, in the Remake, Cloud remembers Sephiroth walking up to Jenova’s tank in the reactor from Sephiroth’s perspective. He is looking through Sephiroth’s eyes, through his memory, up at “Mother.” In that moment in the Remake, Cloud is Sephiroth. He’s not Cloud anymore.

Cloud sees Sephiroth delivering the speech of being an Ancient. Cloud wasn’t there. Cloud didn’t see that. Zack did. That is Zack’s memory.

The man writing the Remake is the same man who’s been at the head of MOST FFVII writing. He was on the OG, he wrote Advent Children, he wrote the novels, he wrote Crisis Core, he’s writing the Remake. He knows what these cells can do because he’s crafted this world-building for decades.

Cloud didn’t take all of Zack’s memories. He didn’t need to. Kadaj, in the novel, doesn’t glean everything from someone right off the bat. Because he doesn’t need to. Only when he needs to learn something else does he go digging. The same is probably true for what Cloud’s cells most likely did to be able to know what he knows. Hell! Kadaj gets punched in the novel and he ACCIDENTALLY picks up the emotions and memories of the guy who punched him. He didn’t want ‘em but he got ‘em!”

There is evidence within the OG, and even more within the Compilation, that lend weight to the theory that Cloud unintentionally read Zack’s mind when it came to the events of Nibelheim.

For years, people have wondered, “How the hell does Cloud know that if he wasn’t there?” For years, people have wondered, “How can he use the Buster Sword if he was just a little grunt that used a gun all the time?” The logical answer is, “Because of his Jenova cells. They can just do that shit.”

[hey-its-cammy]

This is No Mistake

Teaser 

Title: This is No Mistake (Teaser)

Pairing: Dean x Reader (Eventually) 

Word count: 3019

Summary: Y/N always felt out of place. Like she didn’t belong in this life. In this universe. She felt like she belonged and had a purpose somewhere else. Of course she never knew where until something bad happened and led her to her destiny. To her purpose in life.  

Chapter trigger warnings: Mentions of suicide, shitty parents, mentions of depression, mentions of low self-esteem, blood, minor character death

A/N: So I just recently thought about this and it has been on my mind recently. Maybe I can turn it into a series maybe not. This is actually one of my longest things I've ever written, positive feedback is always welcome and constructive criticism is nice as long as you are, I am always trying to improve ;) Let me know what ya think!

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Your home life wasn’t all what you had hoped it would be, it wasn’t bad but you suppose it wasn’t good either. After years of being bossed around by your mother and all the verbal abuse from your family members, it seemed that life wasn’t turning out like you had hoped. You felt like the walls around you were your cage. How? You have always been told and kept reminding yourself that people had it worse than you, that you had it made. Your mother and father fought constantly while you grew up and still do. You remembered a time when you were younger and hoped they would make amends and it would be better, it never happened. The fighting only got worse as you grew and started to become more aware of the arguments. Pretty soon you couldn’t escape them, they always seemed to happen while you were around. You wondered if they were fighting about you, of course they were. What else would they be fighting about? It has always been you or money, past things that your mother brought up that didn’t matter now. 

Both of your parents were quite complex yet strangely simple. Your father was a toxic masculine man, tall and with dark features. He was loud when he got angry, you were constantly afraid of him hitting you but he never laid a finger on you somehow. He was simple. He liked cars, you would help him with them when you were little. He was a mechanic. Honestly they were some of your fondest memories. Even if he was constantly fighting with your mother or really verbal with the abuse he laid into you, he managed to be surprised when you seemed to magically have self-esteem issues. Honestly, heavens no. Not his child. 

He was an asshole but there were moments that he wasn’t, you held onto those for your dear life. Like the moments when you were little? The nice memories of the past. They tend to sadden you now that you are older, wishing you could return into that carefree state of mind. Growing up sucked. Bad. Even when you were younger you saw what it turned into. Both of your parents were unhappy with life. It never changed. Even if you liked your father more than your mother, you still always felt uncomfortable around him. You two rarely spoke and when you did it was a question or small talk.  

Now your mother? Ha, she was something different than your father who was actually quite laid back. No, your mother was an uptight bitch who constantly rode your ass like a pack mule. Throwing more emotional and mental issues on your back like a load, expecting you to just accept it and move on. With her it was always her way or the highway or so the saying goes, something like that. Even with small things like folding laundry, if you didn't do it her way then she would get pissed off and blame things on you that have no correlation what-so-ever. It was just sad.

You never felt like you deserved any of it. It never sat right with you. Well everything thinks their parents are shit but why you? Isn’t that what everyone thinks? 

You held onto the moments where things seemed to be so normal, family outings to the fair every year or walking around the mall. Sure there were still some bickering and banter between the two of them but nothing like the usual. It was nice, you didn’t feel like running away and hiding. Something you often did when you were at home, being in your room all day everyday until your only best friend invited you out with her. She was a nice getaway, a break from your family. Hell, when you were in your teens you’d spend weeks at a time at her house. Her parents were divorced but her mom was cool, she let you drink sometimes. You two still are best of friends, peas in a pod, creme and cookie of the oreo. 

Now Anna, your best friend since freshman year of highschool, she was a character. She was your twin flame, or so she called it. Frankly you never heard of the term before she used it and explained it to you one night, you two were at her step-dad’s house in the kitchen. You remembered it vividly. 

The blonde haired, blue eyed female was to your right while you stood at the end of the kitchen island, looking at the marbled surface. Y/E/C eyes casted down on the surface under your fingers. 

“That’s what i'm saying, we lived virtually the same lives but yet we are different in most aspects.” She said softly but with enthusiasm. 

“Hmm?” You zoned out for a moment while she went on a tangent, thinking about a place that isn’t here. You did it more often than you’d like to admit honestly. You rather be hunting with Sam and Dean. 

“Y/N, are you listening? Twin flames.” She waved a hand in front of your face to grab your attention. 

Your glossy gaze lifted and became clear to focus on your bff. “Huh?” You said again. Sad you didn’t get to finish your thoughts about your hunt in this other world. It all felt so vivid and real until you came falling back into reality. Shit blows. 

“Twin flames. That's what we are.” She repeated herself. Maybe she picked up on the blank stare you gave her but when it clicked, she explained. “It's like your twin but not.”

“Helpful.” You nodded sarcastically. 

“Y/N i'm serious! Think of tinkerbell and her sister.”

“Periwinkle.” You said before your mind even registered that you knew it, must have been the millions of times you have seen the movies. 

“Yes, they don't really look anything alike at all,” She motioned with her hands between the two of you. “They are completely different but work so well with each other like they were made for one another.”

“Like a soulmate?” 

“No, well sorta but no.” 

“Ya lost me.” You tilted your head and sent her a half smile. 

“Ugh nevermind. But you’re my twin flame.” 

Those were the good days, when you were around each other constantly. You were fluid and around each other so much that when you were out, people thought you were dating. Of course the two of you would laugh it off and give that person a run for their money on that bet or assumption. That's just how you two were. You were a tomboy and she was a lipstick, it fit. She wasn’t a lesbian, she was bisexual and so scared what you would think when she came out to you. Honestly you just laughed and said you liked boobs too, who doesn’t? They are squishy! 

She was great but you always felt like she was just using you for emotional stability sometimes. Of course that’s not a bad thing but like...constantly. You were the less emotional one and when you were, you struggled with showing them. You only cried when you were alone, it took you five years of close friendship with Anna for her to actually see you cry. Of course that just had to be when she needed you to be strong for the both of you. At least in your mind that's how it was supposed to be. She was talking about committing suicide that night and it stuck with you ever since. She grounded you when you were feeling numb. Made the dark days sunny again. She was all you had.

Weakness was never something you took kindly to at all. Probably what you got from your father, you never saw him cry. You were always told to shut up and stop being a baby when you cried, people mocked you constantly. When you were younger you were very emotional but you couldn't help it. You were young. So now that you were older, you never showed it to anyone.

Now here you were, alone in your room, sobbing. One of your patients had died on your table today, he was a nine year old mastiff and his heart was too weak to take a simple knee replacement surgery. You loved big dogs so it only made your heart heavier. You were a veterinary surgeon at a local animal hospital about two miles from your apartment complex. You had many jobs when you were younger; a waitress, bartender, maid, secretary for a human hospital and you of course volunteered at the career center to teach kids about cars when you were available. 

Teenage boys were exhausting and sometimes very sexist, thinking it was cool and would get brownie points with any girl to hit home base. That was only until Dakota showed up in your class. She was a whirlwind of hellfire and a demon in lipstick. She basically ran the small shop that you taught in and ran the boys right into the ground. 

With a flip of her apple scented hair, they would be on their knees kissing the ground she walked on. Quite empowering even for you to say the least. She looked up to you though, it was nice. You always had that motherly charm about you, always taking care for others and never yourself. It was slowly going to kill you, at least that was what Anna said. You still looked out for others though, even her so frankly how can you?

The dog though, that was hard. Having to tell the family for them to just blow up in your face and blame you for his death. That hurt worse. Low blow to yourself and sadly as these things happen, you spiral. You spiral so much until you are numb, empty and don't care about anything. 

You were broken from your thoughts when your phone rang, vibrating on the wooden table. Jesus what time was it? You knew it was late. When you picked up the phone the small clock read 2:34 AM. Who was calling you this late? None other than your bestie had the balls to call you when you should be sleeping. 

You wiped your eyes and cleared your voice, answering the call.

“Hey! Knew you'd be awake.” She said cheerfully on the other side of the line. 

You smiled, even though she couldn’t see it. “Hey,” it came out as a raspy whisper, you cleared your throat and tried again. “Hi. Well you know, never sleep much anyway.” Insomnia is a bitch. You thought and placed the phone between your ear and shoulder as you shifted. You took the phone and moved it to your other ear. 

“Well don’t get comfy, i'm on my way to pick you up, mom misses you and so do I.”

You sighed. “Does anyone in your house sleep?”

“You’re awake too.” She said in a matter-of-fact tone. 

“Right. Okay well give me some tim-”

“No need, I'm at your door.” 

You heard keys in your lock and sighed, hanging up the phone with a click. Anna walked in just as you walked out of your room in a plain grey shirt that went down to your mid thigh and boyshort underwear. 

“Sup bitch.” She greeted and you smiled, walking towards her. She hugged you and the two of you sat down on your couch in the living room. You talked about the usual ‘how's work, what have you been up to’ the same old same old small talk. It was nice to see her after a few weeks. 

She made herself comfortable on your couch while you got dressed. Going for your usual jeans, band tee and boots. Anna always thought you looked like a total badass and on some days, you felt like it. Tonight wasn't the night though. 

You threw your hair up into a messy ponytail to keep it out of your face and grabbed your things, heading out with your friend. 

“Mom is excited to see you.” She beamed. 

“I'm sure she is, haven't seen you two in a while. Not like I used to. Work has been busy.” You didn’t look at her, afraid she’d see through you.

“I don't believe that, i think you've just been busying yourself with work and using it as an excuse to not get out and socialize.” 

Of course without fail, she did. “I'm not.” You said sternly. 

“Yeah i'm sure. Y/N you need to get over him. It’s been five months.”

You held your tongue. Easy for you to say, you bat an eye at a man and they fall to your feet. You thought. People avoid me like the plague. 

“He cheated on you, you don't need to stress yourself over a man like him.”

“That is three years of my life down the drain Anna.” 

“I know it is, i just-” 

You cut her off. “You don't know. Your relationships never last longer than a few months at most.”

“Ouch.” Her face fell and she trained her eyes on the road. You turned your head to look at her and you could see tears prick her eyes. 

“Sorry. I just- people don't chase after me like they do you. I'm not that girl. I’ve never been that girl. I'm not as pre-” 

“I'd chase after you if I were a man. Hell, Y/N/N I’ve been gay for you for years!” You smiled now, the thick tension in the air fading. 

“Yeah well we both said that when we turn fifty and we aren't married, we are marrying each other.” You two always said this even after a year of being friends, it was hard for you to trust. 

Anna gave you a knowing look and smiled. “Still a promise, sexy bitch.”

You both laughed out loud and you turned up the music she was playing, a comfortability between the two of you. 

You dated Chace for three years, friends for four years before that. You couldn’t believe it when you caught him with your ex friend Maddie in your bed together. Well maybe you could, he did say once before when he was drunk that he liked her. You shrugged it off, trying to not let it get to you. Such an idiot for that. Either way it hurt, bad. Anna was there when you reached out to her, just to stay with her until you got back on your feet. Now you live in an apartment down the road from her and you couldn't feel more free. It was safe to say two were really close. You had never been so close with someone that they knew what you were thinking by your face. It was odd. You hid everything from your parents but with her? She saw right through you like you were made of clear glass. It was thick but you could still look in. One time she compared you to lion glass. It was the only thing keeping the lion away from ripping the people into shreds. Metaphor for your emotions.

Of course after spending time with Anna and her mother, you felt better. She had a habit of doing that, cheering you up. She was happy with her new boyfriend, you were happy for her. Better than her being so lonely all the time. 

Little did you know this would be the last time you got to see your best friend again. 

You woke up alongside her, your head pounding from the night of drinking. You two always shared a bed, a habit you picked up while you were young. 

You got up, your feet hitting the softness of the carpet until it felt warm and damp. Groaning you thought you just stepped in dog pee and stepped around it only to feel it again and again. “What the hell?” 

You flicked on the light only to be in horror of what was in front of you. Your eyes burned and you immediately felt sick to your stomach, running to the bathroom to throw up the contents. Your mind was just playing tricks on you, this can't be happening. What the actual hell. There were no such things as monsters or ghosts. Freaking Scooby-Doo taught you that the real monsters were people! This is like something out of the show Supernatural you thought to yourself. Gathering yourself up off the bathroom floor, taking a deep breath, a man kicked the door down. You screamed and everything faded to black. 

Supernatural. A show you were in love with. It held all the things you were so interested in, angels, demons, Heaven and Hell. All of it. Two very attractive men playing the lead roles of the characters. Sadly you never got to meet them after the show's ending, probably never will. You watched panels and things while you were at home. Wishing you were there to see them in person. Never once did you have the money to just leave to the state or country they were visiting and having a panel in. When they did come to your state, you were out of the country on a school trip. Life is just that way. 

So here you were, waking up in a dark musty room. The lamp on the bedside table seems to be your only light source right now, besides the light coming from under the door. Where the hell were you? It felt oddly familiar but you have never been here before. At least not to your waking knowledge. A light knock on the door made you jolt up, your head pounding as you sat up. Your hand came to hold it as a certain tall, long haired man entered. 

“Sorry about that, I didn't mean to make you fall, you hit your head on the floor pretty hard. You might have a concussion so take it slow.”

He was right, light hurt. Everything was hazy and slow. You rubbed your eyes and blinked a few times. The male started to come into view. “Jared?”

He looked at you puzzled.

“Sam?” 

[unproduciblesmackdown]

which bmc scenes make you the softest bc for me it's gotta be most of the stagedorks scenes ESPECIALLY a guy that i'd kinda be into. mostly bc of christine cause her and michael are my favs (i love them all sm though) but also bc of jeremy because he is a close second to both of them. also vimh but vimh makes me cry a lot although nowadays i can hardly watch one scene without at the very least tearing up. anyways yeah which ones make you soft

i simply rewatched bmc and took notes for this and really got off track at points in the sense of sticking to What Makes You Softest but that’s how it goes babey

ACT ONE - in mts when jeremy is just having a whole moment being smitten in christine's presence while she's inelegantly picking herself up off the floor and smearing on lip balm and adjusting a skirt wedgie - jeremy and michael just being default that glad to meet each other in the middle of a random schoolday - michael hyping up jeremy's crush on christine and just encouraging this momentum to get jeremy to sign up for the play - ilpr.....that christine stops after like, the first two verses and goes back to her book b/c she doesn't figure someone's looking to listen to her beyond that but then she sees jeremy's still 110% paying attention and the whole rest of the song enfolds with increasing enthusiasm - jake doing that whole bit "all the pressure i feel to be the best at everything all the time" lmao classic stuff here, depressing content delivered in this humorousse way. charming moment - "leave me alone, i've had a bad day" - 2pg......when michael taps jeremy on the shoulder to get jeremy to join in on his choreo, which jeremy then does.....that michael asks if jeremy will be too cool for Video Games and jeremy just responds Emotionally Directly......we love the Favorite Person moment......that this song just ends with the two of them grooving 2gether god bless - jeremy stammering and Tics and Fidgeting when the squip remarks uponst it - jeremy delivering the Looking Pretty Sexy Brooke as awkwardly as possible and she's just like "thanks :)" - jeremy's own Theatricality coming out......hey hamlet - jeremy spinning around in place alternately addressing both brooke and the squip with "oh i'm supposed to meet my friend michael" - nice little detail wherein brooke signals for chloe to join in on her choreo - speaking of, v fond of the Moment jeremy is in on both their choreo......brooke sort of alarming jeremy with her whole attempted grande finale, straw and all, ft. the first instance of her messing with his hair so much she's just tugging his entire head around - cute that jake and rich have a sort of 2pg-esque handshake routine too - jeremy's "that's sad, what should i do" reaction re: jenna - rich's Earnest invitation to come over and play xbox... - "bonjour, jeremy" "ooh brooke!" and this whole exchange, her complimenting him, him laughing at "That Was French" and remembering to ask about pinkberry - love the whole choreo sequence/s in sync up, especially fond of his Moments with the girls, bumping hips with chloe (twice), hearing some Gossip from jenna, posing with brooke.... ;__; - the bowling alley performance art exchange before agtikbi ;____; - agtikbi......the glittery hearts choreo.....the whatever! the interlude or whatever!!! the I Guess A Part Of Me section hhhhoughhh ;o; ;o; ;o; ;o; ;o; that she pulls him into a hug and puts her head against his shoulder omggg ;_________; - brooke just trying to interact with jeremy the Right Way w/o any guidance on the bleachers and it continues to be awkward and funny....like comforting just his Leg while he converses w/his squip.....how she just ends up Physically pushing him around by the hands and head and shoulder and etc......whole situation here in upgrade.mp3 clearly less than Ideal but jeremy and brooke are nevertheless very cute individually And together - meanwhile jake also trying to genuinely Be With christine in upgrade is also charming lol, quitting archery to hang w/a girl like her.... - i always love when the Playful Shove brooke gives jeremy at "but at the mall, you looked at me" pushes him back a whole few steps....this moment of them truly Getting each other sans anyone else's interference.....tres magnifique - jeremy being That psyched to see michael for the first time (in like, less than one full day lol)....michael being That psyched just hearing that jeremy's cool scifi thing worked out after all - lgw ;_________________________; - like i'm some normal, handsome guy..... - giving us All that silence after "The Problem Has Always Been Me" - the whole bit where he launches into the "I'm Not The [series of insults]" and i've realized it's really especially a stretch to say i'm Soft for these moments in lgw but i Am vulnerable and that's its power. little 1" tall will roland on my screen here just made me shed a real tear doing That.....

ACT TWO - brooke's Howl at the end of her verse lmawooo - oughhh jeremy and brooke Greeting each other at the party too, jeremy unable to disappoint her and going for the Real Compliment, just v charming. rip - jake and jeremy's danceoff lol hell yes and then jake just having Misunderstood the costume plan between him and christine lol - the squip getting in on the dancing :) go you funky little ai - jeremy and brooke singing that last verse of Halloween v enthusiastically at each other, - again that jeremy is just genuinely glad to see michael.... - the inherent intimacy of singing mitb b/c your bff dumped you..... - AGTIKBI REPRISE..... ;______________________________; hhhhuouuuoh my god :'3 the lil detail that at the Height of things christine is Shy and turns away.....just. This Scene oh my god - soft in a vulnerable way like, rip to jenna where we're seeing chloe's Lack Of Enthusiasm in accepting a call from her :[ - the Shift at the start of the pants song :] - and the lil mitb reprise during said pants song lmao, also always having a great time w/this concept of "maybe this teen having a rough time needs some guidance from someone grown w/all that bonus maturity here" - i wish there was a way i could help everyone but i don't know how so i guess i'll just do theatre..... - jenna being Moved simply being asked for the first time ever How She Is u_u then her being like "....Okay!" lmfao jenna's great - just have to say in whatever context i'm v fond of pitiful children there at the end lmfao the bass kicks in like that and we're having a great time - the audience always having that response to "all the way to broadway" - jeremy going "you came to see me in the play? :)" like, that he's processing the significance of that in the middle of these Very Raised Stakes - i'm soft for will roland's vocal glitching mouth noises live every night!!! - jeremy like "ha! >:)" flipping his squip off after he's successfully Apologized lmfaoooo love him - but then having that real And I'm Stronger Than You Think I Am victory like :'| - that michael's been by like a ton btw during jeremy's probably somewhat concerning coma. also cherish the lil dance he does while they're celebrating mr. heere's bepantsedness - jake and jeremy sharing a Dab - and just the Popular Kids actively seeking him out to help re: christine b/c they just Want To Be Supportive.....very nice - this vimh interlude or whatever with christine and jeremy like jlsdfhh i think of this all the time - me and the voices in my head have made up our collective mind ;__; what do they say we should do ;______; and the Woohoo! ;_______________; - huoughh kiss and you KNOW especially the [jeremy spinning away in sheer enthusiasm] of 2.0 just KILLS THE MAN ;O; - jeremy not missing a beat despite the squip's interruption leeet's GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - the more than survive na na na na na na na na na na na's but they're all So, and jeremy ending With everyone but also there with Himself and it's so Good and Everything Wants What Vimh Has!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hhrough ;0; - that jason does that spin at curtain call w/his excellent squip costume... - that in virtually any given curtain call when they get into line together there's that lil ritual of george smacking will's ass lmao love languages

i mean tl;dr quite Same in that like, most likely to inspire tearing up over something or other includes agtikbi reprise and vimh which is just like, again any finale wants what it has, and the I Guess A Part Of Me bit of the non-reprise agtikbi like Oof augh this is so cute, and lgw always Gets me, and while i was rewatching speaking of being soft and move-able i was also just continually struck with delight over various moments throughout, and noticing little details for the first time thank god. just Vulnerable the whole time

[demivampirew]

Keep Calm and Go to London chapter 8

Synopsis: This is the story of (y/n), a successful actress, musician, musical producer and songwriter. After battling depression and breaking up a long relationship, she seeks for a change of air, escaping LA for a while going to visit some friends in London and there she meets Henry. -Disclaimer: some chapters are mostly smut.

Previous Chapters:

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Triggers: smut

Tag list: Here’s the incredible people who showed me support (thank  you   so much for that) and people who asked me to tag them too  ☺️   (I   think I will write a few chapters of this story, if you want me to  tag   you, tell me ☺️   ) @cavillanche @mary-ann84 @henry-owns-these-tatas @yespolkadotkitty @dancingwendigo   constip8merm8   penwieldingdreamer iloveyouyen  littlefreya  wondersofdreaming  alyxkbrl solariumss  sweetybuzz25 @thethirstyarchive @agniavateira   @honeyloverogers @hell1129-blog   @lunedelorient​  @michelle-1185​

You were glad that you picked a big bag and that you brought enough clothing for at least another day. You didn't want to overstay your welcome, but there was like an invisible force dragging you to him. You wanted to be near him as much as you could. He didn't ask you to stay and you were a little afraid to ask. "If you asked, he's probably going to say yes...but, would it be because he wants to or because he's polite?" you asked yourself. You put on some jeans and a green sweater and the boots you were the day before -luckily, you choose a pair of boots that looked good with everything and were really comfortable- and then went to the kitchen to have breakfast with Henry. When you got there, he had prepared you waffles and tea and he prepared himself some meat among other things that his diet required. You ate the delicious breakfast while you were talking about the show and that he started filming that week. After breakfast, he asked you what you wanted for lunch and dinner and you couldn't help yourself but smile brightly. - What? - he asked you curiously and amused - I didn't know if you wanted me to stay another day and I didn't want to ask, it did not seem appropriate. - you replied and he looked at you confused. - For now on always assume that I want you to stay. I think you should check out of the hotel and stay here as long as you are in London. -he said as he approaches you and stroked your face and kissed you. - I'm going to do some grocery shopping today, you should come with me and then we go to the hotel so you can pick up your stuff and let the hotel receptionist know that you're leaving, ok? I mean, only if you want to. -Absolutely- you answered; you couldn't contain your happiness. Thankfully, Henry knew exactly all the right places to go shopping without worrying about getting recognized. He bought enough foodstuff for three days. After that, you went to the hotel. Thankfully, you let the receptionist know that you were leaving early and there was no problem and she was nice enough to allow you to take Kal to the suit too. Thankfully, you didn't have much work to do. You hated unpacking in hotel rooms, so most of your belongings were in your suitcases. You went to the bathroom to make sure there were no items left and after that, the two of you left with your three big suitcases and your guitar -you never went anywhere without one-. You carry two bags and hang your guitar on your shoulder. Henry wanted so badly to play the gentleman and handled all by himself, but had to admit that he needed a free hand to carry Kal's leash. He also tried to carry my guitar, but his arms were too big and the case's straps were too tight and didn't fit him. You laughed because he was the cutest thing in this world. While Henry was preparing dinner, you were trying to unpack your clothes but keep getting interrupted by Kal who wanted you to play with him. Your phone rang as you were petting the puppy and you saw your agent's name in the id caller. - Hi Bri! How are you? - you said as soon as you answer the call - Hi y/n! I'm great! How are you doing? - Much better. London it's been great. It's been a blessing coming here. - Yeah, I bet coming has been a blessing.- he replied and you notice by the tone of his voice that he was making a double sense comment. -Who told you? - you asked irritated but laughing a bit for the stupid comment. - Beth. Don't blame her, she thought that I'd already known. So, you and Superman. - Yep. - Are you dating? Or just hooking up? - Somewhere in between. We like each other a lot and we like to spend time together, but for the moment that's all. We'll see, there's no rush. - Well...so I'm not sure then how are you going to take the news that I got for you. - What news? - you questioned worriedly - I got the date for the audition for the movie. - OMG! That's great!- you exclaimed excitedly. - It's in four days. So I need your ass in a plane to LA as soon as possible if you want to make it in time. - you had to sit on the bed as you heard the news. Four days? Things were just starting with Henry and you already had to leave him to go back to LA. You couldn't miss the audition, it was the opportunity that you've waiting for, working again with your friend Anne Hathaway and finally getting to work with your idol, with the great Meryl Streep. You wanted to ask Henry to go to LA with you, but you knew that wasn't even a possibility, not just because you'd never dare to ask him to do something like that for you, it was too much to ask, and also he started to film the second season of The Witcher that week. So you knew that you would have to leave him for a few days to audition. Kal must have felt your sadness because he started to make noises and caressing your hand with his head. After the call ended, with Brian letting you know that he was going to booked the plane ticket for you, and with you asking him to allow you to have that last night with Henry before leaving, so he promised to get it for the next day and he informed you that he was going to send you via mail the script that you had to learn for the audition. You went to the kitchen and saw Henry cooking a delicious dinner. You couldn't look into his face, so you hugged him from behind, put your face on his back and sigh, then slightly turn your face to the side, still resting your head on his body, and told him the news. You could feel his body get tensed. He was upset as well. He turned around, you could see that he was sad but doing his best to hide it from you. -It'd be just four a few days, right? It's ok!- he said as he placed his forehead on yours, and you weren't sure if he was talking to you or himself. -Yes. I have the audition in four days and I'll probably stay there for a few days to take care of a few things and to see my bff, but then I'll be back, I promise. Besides, I'm looking to move here, remember? So of course that I'm coming back.- you assure him. He cupped your face with his hands and kissed you and then hugged you. -This is our last night together for a few days, let's make it count, should we? - Couldn't agree more! - he smiled at you and grabbed your hand to kiss it. - I have a special surprise for you tonight- you said playfully. - Oh, really? -he asked amused -Yes, but I need to ask you to do something for me tonight. - Whatever you want me to, just tell me. - Could you... wear a suit? - your question and gave him an not so innocent look. - Yeah...why?- he asked curiously. -For now, that's all you need to know. After the tasteful dinner, you chat for some time and then you excused yourself to go to the bathroom to refresh yourself. You indicated Henry that you were going to text him to let him know when you were ready and he could enter the room. He put on a dark grey suit with a shirt underneath and a nice pair of shoes. After waiting for half an hour, he got the text from you saying that was ok to enter the room. As soon as he got into the room, he turned on the lights, that was off. And there you were, sitting on the edge of the bed, with your legs crossed, wearing a red silk robe that looked more like a dress than a robe;  it was slightly opened on the top, so a red lace bra that you had on was visible. You picked up your hair in a middle ponytail and looked amazing with the curls. Your make up was quite simple but perfect, barely any eyeshadow, mascara, foundation and the most important of all, a vibrant red colour lipstick. You could see it on his face, he completely lost it as soon as he saw you. - I've been waiting for you, Mr. Bond. - you said in a serious tone. He looked confused. - I know why you are here. You're looking for this - you took a small pen drive that was hidden on your bra- You want this, don't you, Mr. Bond? - you questioned continuing with the game. Finally, Henry understood what was going on and followed your lead, smoothly getting closer to you and trying to take the device from your hand, but it was too late, you had hidden it again.- I'm not giving it up so easily...if you want it, you'll have to earn it- you implied and starred at him with a devilishly look. He looked at you with desired, but annoyed like if he didn't have time for that, he was truly getting into the role. You grabbed his face with your left hand and licked his right cheek and then whisper into his ear - I've heard that you're even better as a lover than as a spy- you said and smiled. After a second of looking intensely into each other's eyes, he picked you up by your thighs and put you against a wall, and started to kiss your neck and your breasts. You stopped him and pull him away from you. You were smirking as you told him that you were the one that set the rules. He pulled himself up and gave you an annoyed look, waiting for instructions. - Go to the and lay on it. Don't take off your clothes. you ordered him and he obeyed you. Once he was resting on the bed, you took two silk scarfs and used them to tight his hands on each side of the bed. Then you got on top of him and put a black scarf on his head, covering his eyes. You whispered on his ear "my rules: you can't see or touch" and you laughed. Then, you begin to run your fingers through his body. You unbuttoned his shirt and started kissing his chest and taking small bites, not too deep to hurt him. You liked his lips and the placed your finger on top of them, feeling them. You reached his pants and unzipped them and then grabbed his member by the side, still with his underwear on and the past your tongue through it. You look at his face and you could see the anger; he was furious, he was a loud lover, he already wanted to scream of pleasure, but probably felt like that was not something Bond would do. For some reason, that sense of desperation turned you on even more. You took off his shoes and the rest of the clothing getting in the way. You grabbed his penis and put it into your mouth. You liked up and down, in circles around the top. You made sure he felt your lips surround him and then you went deep into the base of his cock. He tried hard not to make a noise, but it was getting harder and harder for him. You could feel him on your throat and then slowly took him out and continue the same rhythm than before. You repeated the same thing once again and then started to kiss his chest again. You also planted kisses on his Adam's apple. You took the scarf that was covering his eyes and he looked at you. For a little moment, you could see Henry, thirsty for you, wanted to take you so bad, and then you saw Bond again; he has enjoyed the game you came up with, maybe a little too much. You grabbed his hard member a put it inside of put, pulling your panties aside. You started to ride him. You saw him battle a few times to set his hands free, but couldn't. Finally, after a while, you decided to set him free. He stood up and you looked at him. "This isn't over, Mr. Bond. If you want this, you'll have to go all the way through" you exclaimed. You stood up and went after him and he turned around and grabbed you and put you against the wall. He tossed your panties away and grabbed one of your legs and put it on his shoulder as he went down on you. He took his time to pleasure you with his tongue and the made you turn around and bend slightly and he fucked you hard against the wall. Then, he was penetrating you hard against the wall, while he grabbed you by your thighs. After he came, he went down on you again. -Take it, you earned it.-you said handed him the pen drive. It was a pleasure Mr. Bond. I hope this is not the last time we made business together.- you finished and winked at him and then went into the bathroom. Well, for sure this was a night Henry will never forget.

[queerbutstillhere]

Hi!!! I don't know if ur still taking prompts but if u do could you do one where Jon gets hit by a love portion and falls for someone who is NOT Damian and Damian is sooo jealous that at one point he confesses to Jon and kiss him which break the live potion effect because true lov3 and all. Also if you could include the batbros that would be great. Thanks in advance if you do XD XD

(Hi! So sorry this took so long 😅 I got busy with #batlanternweek and my Damijon fics on Ao3 and writing a gift for a friend! But! I finally got here! And now that I've written it, I really like this prompt so thank you!!)

Damian was cranky. Even more so then usual. To the point where even Dick had stopped trying to cheer him up. He was so pissed he broke a guys nose literally just for breathing at him. He had gone off on the Teen Titans, nearly killed Tim(yes, again. And they had been doing so well), helped Red Hood steal from a pharmacy(not in his Robin uniform, of course), and had been snubbing Maya and Colin all week.

Why was he so cranky?

Because his best friend, and long time crush, was pining over someone that wasn't him. And this was a problem™.

Now he would never, ever, in a million years confess to Jon. It was just out of the question. For the longest of time, the boy was just too young and Naive, and wouldn't understand, probably be weirded out. And then he went into space for a week, and came back three years older (fuck you Bendis) making him the same age as Damian, also taller then him. And worse, no longer a virgin, which had really upset him, because maybe he had been harboring the desire to deflower the half-kryptonian. But that was his secret to keep, as was the age in which he lost his own virginity, albeit a dumb thing to fret over.

Now you might be thinking, how on Earth has Jonathan Kent fallen for anyone but our handsome, striking, emotionally constipated detective protagonist. The answer was simple, dumb and entirely too aggravating.

They had been working with the Teen Titans, tracking down a new meta who was causing issues in Washington, the state, not the District. This Meta was calling themselves "Eros" like the Greek god of passionate desires. Which of course, led the team to believe their powers had something to do with people's emotions. Well that and the pile of police reports about that exact topic.

Damian hadn't been as concerned as he probably should have been. His team knew the risks and all trusted each other, and apologized in advance, should Eros get to any of them. They were a good group of supers, he begrudgingly admitted. Bringing Kent along probably wasn't the best idea, but with it being summer break and them spending the weekend together, he hadn't really had much of a choice.

He really didn't remember how it happened, just that one moment they had been battling the red and white clad meta, and the next he heard Jon yelling and saw him tackle Jackson.

The arrow sticking out of his back was not a good sign.

As it turned out, the arrow was a love potion, and it made Jon instantly fall for Jackson. Which the teen thought was hilarious. Jon on the other hand, spent the whole next week moping around and bemoaning his childish issues to Damian, who was very annoyed that the damn potion hadn't worn off yet.

"Damian, get off your ass, it's time to patrol," Tim said as he breezed past the futon Damian was sat on.

"He can't," Dick's voice carried across the cave. "He got grounded, remember?"

"Oh, shit. Right. Why?"

"Damian!" A whiny voice called, and Damian wanted to put a knife through his brain.

"That's why," he bit out, pushing to his feet.

He had approximately thirty seconds before Jon located him.

"What? I thought you and Superlad were bff's again," Tim asked, confused.

"We were, until he got hit by a love potion and has fallen head over heels for someone el- on the team."

His stumble wouldn't have been noticed by anyone but his brothers. Tim's eyebrow arched up as he buckled the belts that went across his chest.

"That's rough. Had that happen with Kon a few times. It really doesn't wear off Kryptonian's quite right. Good luck!"

Tim waved and walked away, quickly replaced by Jon, who meandered over, in Superboy uniform. This uniform was a significant improvement on his last one, and Damian would like to take credit for that, this one was actually a bodysuit, red boots that went nearly to his knees, red gloves, and his red cape. The body suit was mostly blue with some dark gray, and then the red and gold on the S emblem.

"Are we going patrolling?" Jon asked with a sad sigh.

"No," Damian bit out, feeling a ripple of anger.

He turned and stalked out, Jon literally floating after him. Damian went upstairs to the manor, heading to the kitchen, Jon never once leaving his side. He was so annoyed.

"Would you quit?!" He snapped, glaring at the Superboy.

"Oh. . . Okay. Geesh you're so cranky these days."

"Maybe, I'm just tired of you acting like a dumbass. Jackson is never going to love you back, Jon. He's not attracted to boys."

"I know," Jon said with a depressed sigh. "But I can't help it. His eyes, and his skin, and-"

"Fuck you!" Damian snapped and spun on his heel, walking out of the kitchen.

He practically ran up to his room, hoping, in vain, that Jon would just leave him alone and go home. Unfortunately, Jon apparently still remembered his duties as best friend. A few seconds later. There was a knock at the door.

"Damian. It's me, can I please come in?"

"No!"

"Damian."

The door opened anyway. Damian crossed his arms, turning to glare at it.

"Fuck. You."

"i don't understand," Jon said, distraught.

"For a week! I have watched you pining over Aqualad. For a week! You feel nothing for him, not truly, you never so much bat an eyelash at him before!"

This was truly a bad idea, but Damian was so frustrated and tired. And gay.

A Tired, emotionally frustrated gay is never a good thing to have on hand. (Trust me on this one. I am one and live with one)

"You've been chasing after him like he is a god, and yet I've been here this whole time and you never even looked at me. Fuck you, Kent! You know how hard relationships are for me!"

"Wait, what?" Jon asked, freezing and looking confused.

"You're an asshole."

"Damian, wait-"

Damian turned to barge past Jon, who caught him easily, grabbing his shoulders firmly.

"Damian, are you- do you like me?"

"For two years now," Damian bit out.

He had already let the cat out of the bag, might as well give it attention.

"oh my God, Damian, I never-"

Damian didn't think or stop himself. He surged forwards, grabbing Jon's slightly less chubby face and yanking him into a rough kiss, teeth clicking painfully, but Damian didn't stop, just kissed him hard. Jon was stiff for a moment, and then suddenly relaxed considerably. he wrapped an arm around Damian's waist and pulled him close.

Damian whimpered into Jon's lips as the Kryptonian sucked in his bottom lip, gently kissing him. Damian's hand snuck up, tangling into Jon's black hair, and the other teens hand was on his hip, fingers pressing into his flesh. Then Damian realized what he was doing and jerked away, pulling out of Jon's hold and stumbling backwards, across the room. He stared at Jon with wide eyes, hand coming up to his mouth.

"Jon, I'm so sorr-"

"Shut up." Jon started walking closer.

He looked confused, but not angry. He followed Damian across the room and reached out for him, but Damian jolted back again.

"Damian, come here," he said gently, holding out a hand.

Damian shook his head. His heard was pounding, and he felt like he was about to have a panic attack or something.

"Damian. Come. Here."

The words were an order, and it sent a bolt of fear through Damian. He swallowed and stepped forwards, into Jon's reach. The teen gently cupped Damian's face, a thumb stroking his cheekbone.

"Damian. I am so sorry," he murmured. "I'm sorry I've been acting like an idiot all week. You're right, I don't really feel anything for Jackson. He's a good guy, but no one holds a candle for you."

Damian inhaled to speak, but Jon stopped him, continuing talking.

"When I was gone, for three years, the one thing that kept me going, that made me keep fighting, was the thought of you, of coming back to you. For three years."

Damian wanted to sob, hearing those words, but he just closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"Damian. I'm sorry. Really. You- . . . You mean so much to me."

Damian opened his eyes and nodded slightly, meeting Jon's eyes. The teen smiled.

"Can I kiss you again?"

Another nod and Jon leaned in, gently pressing their lips together. Damian relaxed into him, hands coming up to his arms. Jon was already forgiven. Damian couldn't stay mad at his soulmate, not for long, anyway.

[falllpoutboy]

How one teenage boy infuriatingly and inexplicably emotionally scarred me: a story

ok listen up yall this is story is not for the faint of heart as it contains many twists and turns its so shocking such a thing happened to boring ole me. so i had a big (huge) crush in high school on a boy named Jean from grades 10-12 but this wild story starts from grade 9. When i entered high school, i had one class with j**n and after a while i noticed that he was incredibly attractive for a 14 year old, and so did my best friend since 6th grade Kaitlyn (remember her yall!!).

Unfortunately for us he got a gf pretty quickly, so one day after school my creepy ass decided to sneak around and check them tf out in the library behind some books. That backfired immediately as they took notice of me and gave me nasty looks and walked out of the library. The next day, j**n decided to call me out on it in class and my burgeoning friendship with him died right there. Some months later, we actually became friends after he forgot about it and while i had a crush on another boy at that time, i still found him very attractive. Meanwhile my bff k**tlyn was also friends him in their class together. Ninth grade soon ended, and with it my crush on the other boy.

Tenth grade is where this starts to get juicy yall. When i come back to school, i have another class with j**n and we’re assigned close seats to each other and everything is great so i decided to officially crush on him this year. I supposed this is where i should go into detail about him, since we actually got to know each other more. J**n is a cuban-american immigrant, an aquarius, had a tumblr (we followed each other!), often wore plaid and regularly smoked weed (i didnt mind at all). He was very flirtatious and a “feminist” and identified as pansexual. Right away, he starts to date a eleventh grade girl named Melissa (not gonna bother censoring her name tbh) and while i am sad about it, i still crush on him. Around the time of October/November i come to learn of their messy relationship from k**tlyn, apparently she cheated on him and threatened suicide if they broke up aka emotional manipulative af. I was so angry on his behalf but luckily for him, they broke up for good by December.

However after winter break, i start to notice that j**n and growing increasingly closer to k**tlyn. At first i shrugged it off but then I couldn’t ignore it anymore. K**tlyn knew full well how much i liked him yet never approached me about his obvious crush on her. One day in late January i snapped after seeing them together after school again, i texted her “so when were you gonna tell me that j**n had a crush on you?” With that, she immediately comes clean and tells me how he’s been actively pursuing her and had kissed her that day but she’s been rejecting because of ME. I felt sick but also guilty, who was i to come in between mutual feelings? I tell her that “we can’t control who we like and that if you really like him, don’t let me get in the way”. A few days later, i give them both my permission to date (he’s clueless to the matter) and I specifically asked for her to try and make this relationship last. In addition to that, i told her that I would also try to get rid of my feelings for him so that this would be easier for us. They become an official couple on February 4, his birthday.

Needless to say, I obviously do not lose my feelings for j**n and i distanced myself from the two in the time that they were together. I was pretty depressed during that time ngl. So one day, exactly one month later, j**n texts me in class if i talked to k**tlyn that day. I said no, because I hadn't, but his melancholic behavior intrigued me and i asked him if anythings wrong and he tells me that we’ll talk after school. When after school rolls around, he drops a bombshell on me: k**tlyn had broken up with him through TEXT during LUNCH that same day. I was in complete shock! not only did i never suspect that they were going through relationship trouble but I SPECIFICALLY told her to make this a long lasting relationship. J**n was pretty heartbroken over the fact that she didnt give him a real explanation as to why they broke up so he came to me, thinking i knew the answer because im her best friend and i had to swear to him that i didnt know anything, bc i didnt!! We walked around a bit and afterwards sat at a table with k**tlyn and mutual friends and i notice to my sheer horror, that she doesn’t give him a spare glance the entire time. I was shocked and confused, HOW could k**tlyn be so heartless as to breakup with him without a reason?? Before he goes home, i told him that I’d try and get a reason from her later. As soon as i got home that day, i text k**tlyn “why did you break up with j**n? he seems pretty cut up about it?” She texts back, (something mostly likely) “he’s boring and we never did stuff together”. Ouch. So I screenshot it, and sent it to j**n. He angrily texts back a rebuttal (something along the lines of) “IM NOT BORING AND EVERY TIME I TRIED TO SUGGEST WE DO SOMETHING SHE DIDNT ACCEPT IT”. Again, i was so confused and just happened to be in the middle of it all.

A few weeks pass, i become a little bit closer to j**n. I really really like him now, and want to tell him but im obviously nervous. One night during spring break, my sister came home from university and with a little coaxing, she helps me text him that i like him. J**n sympathetically turns me down but he says that he’ll always be there for me. Ouch. I was heartbroken and cried a little that night and tried to put it out of my mind for the rest of the break. One month passes, and after school i hang out with k**tlyn and finally persuaded her into telling me what went wrong during their relationship. She tells me that it started off great at first, but then apparently j**n started to go too fast for her liking, and pressured her into doing stuff she did not want to do. I absorb this information but I obviously didn’t process it at all because i told her straight to her face that i still liked him and i will continue to like him for the foreseeable future. In hindsight, i did not recognize the look of pity she gave me afterwards but she simply said ok and we were on the same page again.

Eleventh grade is where this story takes a turn for the worse. This school year, i had no classes with j**n but that didn’t deter me at all in my pursuit of him. Early on, there was a school dance right after school and we danced really close together and it was... really great. We both joined debate club that year and that meant i at least got to see him after school twice a week. K**tlyn used to be a member of debate club but she left when she noticed that j**n had joined. In debate club, they offered 3 overnight trips throughout the school year, the most important one being the trip to Washington DC for 3 nights to meetup and debate with other students from across the country (k**tlyn did it the year before). I signed up for it and so did j**n. k**tlyn disclosed to me that a lot of students used this trip and relative freedom to... hook up. But there was just one small problem, again: this school year j**n got another girlfriend. A freshman named Samantha.

I was vexed and horribly jealous, but hey thats ok, that meant 3 days of him by me and away from her. The day of winter break, me and k**tlyn were texting on snapchat and the conversation shifted to j**n again. I dont remember exactly how we began to argue, but the conversation got passive aggressive really quickly until she tells me “I don’t care what you do, have fun sucking his dick in washington, don’t talk to me again” at first i thought she was joking and it didn’t register with me that she had cut me off until a few days later. That was our last official face to face conversation and we havent spoken since. I was hurt but this ultimately fueled me more into pursuing j**n. Thankfully i had another best friend to lean on, jazmyn, who was pretty neutral about my crush on j**n which was fine by me. February came around we went to washington dc on a long weekend, the first two days planned looking at monuments and tourist attractions and the last day of the trip landed on Valentines day.

The first two days were great and I was by j**ns side for the majority of it, we even walked around the entirety of the Smithsonian during a free hour. The opportunity for it never came up, but i knew I wouldn’t have hooked up with him anyways, I didn’t want to be a homewrecker. So i decide to do something funny and cute for valentines day, send him some funny tumblr valenties day cards memes during the debate and hopefully he’d get a laugh out of it. So whilst sitting next to him, I send them to him and he does laugh and says thanks. But then, I look down at his phone as he saves the memes and sends them straight to his girlfriend. OUCH! YIKES! i start to silently cry (not full on sobbing but definitely tears) and he notices and he grabs my hand, does the thumb rubbing thing and lays his head on my shoulder in an attempt to cheer me up. it was simultaneously the most agonizing and soothing thing to ever happen to me. Eventually, i stopped crying and we packed up to leave to the airport. Before the plane took off, i get an influx of twitter notifs from jean. To my absolute horror, i noticed that he had spammed my twitter because i rted everyone elses tweets about the trip, so I figured he saw my absolutely pitiful tweet earlier that day “i’ll pretend he’s mine for the day”. I was beyond mortified and emotionally drained and just wanted to go home.

When I got home, after unloading everything on jazmyn and raine (another best friend), i decide to put my foot down with myself. Clearly this guy has no interest in me and i had to stop embarrassing myself for him. So i come up the ingenious idea of the May 1st Plan: basically, i was going to ignore, avoid, and not interact with j**n at all for until may 1st (of course, school ended in early june but i wanted to see if i could do this for almost 4 months, and hopefully the crush would disappear). And surprisingly, I actually followed through with it, all the way until the end of eleventh grade. I didn’t talk to j**n, i didn’t look for him in a room, i didn’t even talk about him excessively to my friends, only that i’ve been following the may 1st plan (they all supported me). Did the crush go away? Partially yes, but some stupid part of me still held on. However, during the time of avoidance, i started to get unlikely another crush on a boy named d*vid. D*vid honestly crept on me, I didnt expect i would like somebody like that but then i did and it surprised me. he was an in debate club, an aries (like me), funny (we shared the same sense of humor), so smart, witty, and was actually empathetic and “woke”. When i was around him, i felt like i could actually be myself and didn’t hold any parts of myself back, unlike with j**n. 

By the time senior year rolled around, I effectively had a crush on both guys, and only one knew that i liked him. I had 3 classes with both of them and 2 of them with each other. Around october/november, i’m in class, sitting next to a girl, and j**n is sitting in front of us. They start to talk about something and next thing I know, they kissed each other. on the lips. right in front of me. Remember when i said j**n was a flirt? Yeah, i wasn’t kidding. I went from calm to enraged in a second and went to the bathroom to cry. After that day, I knew that my half-crush on him was over. He’s a player and didn’t even give me the courtesy of giving me closure when i told him i liked him in tenth grade. From that day on, I only had eyes for d*vid, and all of my friends supported me in my pursuit of him.

One day some time later, after a debate club meeting, i’m in a discussion with two of my friends, tatiana and emily and j**n. Somehow, the conversation turns to the topic of crushes and tatiana and i talk about d*vid right in front of j**n. In the corner of my eye, i see him come to the realization that i no longer like him. Tatiana says something and i reply “i guess i just don’t have the best taste in guys.” J**n hears this, processes this, and promptly walks away... hurt? I felt bad and was scared he would snitch to d*vid so i shout after him “please don’t tell him” to which j**n only gives me the middle finger and keeps walking away. Wow, for the first time in 2 years, I ended up being the one to hurt his feelings, in the most unexpected of ways. Funny, we never discussed my feelings for him and he never gave me closure which resulted in me being hurt so many times but now i say something thats not even that far off from the truth and he’s hurt? Lol, ok. A few days later, I end up apologizing to him and he accepts. A few months pass, as j**n and d*vid end up going on the washington dc trip without me (i decided to save myself the money that year bc i already went the year before). 

When they come back, a few days later j**n approaches me in class and wants to tell me about something that happened during the trip. He tells me that he and d*vid had a bad falling out and that d*vid was still angry with him. Intrigued, i ask why and he tells me that they wanted to hook up with the same girl and j**n did it with the girl knowing d*vid would be upset about it. I was shocked about the situation bc i know you’d have to do something really bad to make d*vid mad and i was secretly angry on his behalf, i knew they were friends so how fucked up can j**n have been to do something like that? He lets me read the hand-written apology letter that he’d give d*vid later and I was just confused as to why he was telling me all of this. Maybe he thought since he knew i cared about d*vid a lot, he could get my approval on the matter. Once again, i just so happened to be in the middle of drama with j**n and somebody i cared for, only this time i didn’t have a raging crush over him.

A few days later i saw that they had made up but once again, j**n showed his true colors to people supposed to be his friends. Anyways the rest of the year passed without incident and we all graduated on the same page with each other. I haven’t talked to j**n since graduation and last year i very briefly talked to d*vid on snapchat. So yeah, hope you all enjoyed this rollercoaster of drama and emotion that was my high school life.

[samingtonwilson]

I haven’t been following you for long, so I have to ask. Who’s kg?

oh lord. ITS A LONG STORY SO HERE U GO:

okay so last year i took a year off from school (because i was planning on just being in theater school full time instead of law school before deciding to go back and finish my degree and do theater at the same time) and i worked 2 jobs, one of which was at a movie theater. and this guy who worked there started off as this person i would vent to about depression and stuff because he understood and we clicked like. IMMEDIATELY. like i met him and two seconds later we were bff. then everyone kept making jokes about the two of us being married and liking each other and i ended up really liking him for the entire time we worked together.

we’d take all our breaks together, hang out constantly, and he was just so much nicer to me than probably anyone has ever been. like he would do anything i asked him to and would drop everything every time i needed help and would get me little things like tea or whatever whenever he knew i’d be a little down. one day when we were supposed to usher together i was sick so he told me to just sit it out and he would do everything, and he told me how happy he was that they paired us together for the day. idk it went on for like 8 months and he even got me this INSANE christmas gift he knew i wanted (along with other people obv but it was his idea) and we had an inside joke we were engaged/married. he even called me after work one night and we talked for 5ish hours where he kept telling me how out of his league i am in every way and the way he told me that was so stupid because he’s a dumb ass but it was so so sweet.

anyway he never told me how he felt and i never told him. i did find out from others that he was like dead in love with me but he never told me so i never talked about it either. then we both ended up quitting that theater with the intention to start at another but i ended up doing something else so we barely see each other now but we’re still friends u know. it’s just sad it ended up that way and in retrospect i do realize he was totally gone for me (like he would lose his train of thought when i looked at him) but i doubted it so much at the time

[remi-demi94]

For Remy: 💕

💕- are you crushing on someone?

Hey Anon!! Ssooooo you wanna know who Remy's crushing on? Hmmm... that's a tricky one. Technically, she has quite of few, but she's too shy to ever admit it. So before she lost her memories, she had a SERIOUS crush on Asra. She had a crush on him the moment after she met them. They eventually got into a amazing relationship, but then the whole red plague came... They had a pretty depressing and abrupt end after Asra left.

Then she started crushing on Julian when she was his apprentice. Well, technically, when Asra and Remy started arguing about leaving Vesuvia from the red plague, she started really enjoying being around Julian, and not just because they work really well together, she loved how passionate he was for his patients and his determination to find the cure for the plague... with addition to his... dramatic personality lmaooooo.

After her death and resurrection, she really appreciated Asra's dedication and helpfulness to Remy, so she started crushing on them again. But you know how Asra would kinda block out MC's memories and avoid the intimacy with MC? Well, because Asra did that, Remy felt like they didn't feel the same way for her, so she didn't say much about her feelings towards them anymore. After that faithful night when Nadia and Julian swung by at night, she had a super HARD crush on Nadia, she thought she was beautiful the moment she took off the shaw, but Remy loves the sound of Nadia's voice too. As for Julian, she wanted to beat his ass at first for breaking in the shop, but his dramatics and apprearance bought out the Dom in her and she thought it was cute when he blushed when she called Asra her "Master".

When she talked more with Nadia at her palace, she started crushing on her harder because they are kinda like kindred spirits from two different worlds. (Before the devs removed the chase game from the Prologue, Remy thought that game was fun. But she really loved seeing Julian again, especially for a drink and the pat down 😏😏😏). She was curious about Muriel, but he didn't talk to her enough for her to crush too hard. Portia was like a bff as soon as they met, but Remy thinks she's super cute. They're like a dynamic duo tbh lol. She's not sure how to feel about Lucio when they first met, especially since he looked like a creepy goat who mostly talked smack about her appearance lol.

As for outside of the main six.... Remy has a MAJOR crush on @wingcinna 's OC Anastasio (aka Lucio and her oc Sajna's handsome son). And if you don't already know, Anastasio and Remy are soulmates lol. Here he is if you're curious, and there he is with Remy.

I mean... look at him!!! Anastasio is ssooooooo fine 🥰🥰😍😍😍. Remy said "Heeeeyyyyyyyy" when she first saw him lol!!! Cinna knows what I'm talking about. 😉

Honestly Remy may eventually just be Anastasio's boo... I might need to make a identical OC for the Arcana (lol jk I'm just teasing) But Remy legit says Anastasio can have it all 😘🥰🤗

Oh wait... is it a crush if she's actually in love with him???? 🤔🤔🤔😊

[noahthesnake]

( TRANSMALE , HE/HIM ) NOAH CUNNINGHAM is a SLYTHERIN whose favorite subject is HERBOLOGY, maybe because they are OUTGOING but also HEDONISTIC. They might be so popular because they look like ELLIOT FLETCHER, can you believe they are a SIXTH YEAR? rumors say they support CREATURE COALITION where do they go from here?

Noah has been a character of mine for a while so I have a bio below that was adapted from when I played him in the past. 

SIXTH YEAR ★ SLYTHERIN ★ PUREBLOOD

“We kissed away our memories and fucked away the pain, we went out for some coffee then we did it all again.”

GENDER: Transgender Male PRONOUNS: He & Him SEXUALITY: Pansexual Panromantic

CHARACTER FEATURES:

A loyal friend to those who make it past his sarcastic nature and pointed jabs. A mouth filled with vulgarity. A pain in the ass to anyone who ever underestimates him or gives him shit. A boy whose family has left him high and dry. Prince to pauper. A fly by night soul who hosts great parties. Average student. Excellent quidditch beater. Out and proud and unapologetically trans. Non-monogamy. Intensity. More than you bargained for. Keeps you on your toes.

☀ Adventurous ☀ Innovative ☀ Quick-Witted

☁ Sarcastic ☁ Impulsive ☁ Hedonistic

CHARACTER AESTHETIC:

Floral Shirts ⚬ Bruised Knuckles ⚬ One Night Stands ⚬ Trans Pride ⚬ Cigarette Smoke ⚬ Malt Whiskey ⚬ Loud Music ⚬ Drugs ⚬ Vulgarity ⚬ Hosting the Best Parties ⚬ Well-Worn Trainers ⚬ Loud Laughter

♜ WAND: Pliant 12″ holly with dragon heartstring core ♜ PATRONUS: Basset Hound ♜ BOGGART: Himself being forced to stifle his gender identity. ♜ AMORTENTIA: Malt whiskey, tobacco, chocolate chip cookies, cedar

Noah is part of a pureblood wizarding family with a father fairly high up in the ministry and a mother who is a homemaker. While he’s always been a bit of a trouble maker, he also has a kind heart when it actually matters. His parents took his mischievousness nature in stride for many years, even though he sometimes drove them crazy. However, that all changed when Noah came home from fourth year.

Hogwarts has always felt like as second home to Noah and he has made friends easily since he first came. However, he didn’t really blossom into himself fully until fourth year when he came out as trans and started identifying as and living as a male. It was the kick in his pants he needed to be authentic and honest about who he is and what he cares about, which has led to some friendships falling apart and others becoming much closer. He’s no stranger to some bullying due to his identity, but he does well at brushing it off.

His family didn’t take the news well and he’s essentially a pariah in his family home now. It’s had an effect on his mental state, although he does his best not to show it. Noah focuses more on partying and fucking around than he does classwork anymore, although he manages to keep himself fit and trained enough to keep up with the quidditch team. Whether he can hold it all together this year is a huge question mark at this point.

Noah is super liberal and has jumped with both feet into the Creature Coalition, just like he has with other movements like queer and trans rights. Everyone knows what he thinks because he has no qualms about being loud about it. He’s doing his best to be the same happy go lucky dude he always has been, but it feels like pressure is coming form all sides and it’s eventually going to have an effect.

Random Headcanons:

He has an owl named Margot

He really loves junk food and is always eating

May be suffering from depression/anxiety but hiding it

Smokes, drinks, uses drugs socially

Is poly but open to monogamy if the right situation presents itself

Has slept around a lot but been in few real relationships

Loves music but has no musical ability himself

Wanted Relationships:

Teammates on the Slytherin quidditch team

A BFF who can open up to about everything he’s carrying around

A long-term friend who has been with him through everything

Peripheral friends who come in and out of his life from time to time

Ex-partner (gender doesn’t matter)

People he parties with on a regular basis

A tutor because the boy needs it

Crush (one-sided or not, either is cool)

Snogging partner

One-night stand

Someone he sleeps with on a regular basis

Potential romantic partner

Someone who Noah does not get along with at all

Open to anything but these were a few first thoughts!

Feel free to hit me up on Discord or here to plot if you’d like. I’m often in and out because of work, but I’d love to get some connections rolling. Either way, this is really long and I’m sorry!

[longeyelashedtragedy]

this has been the most wild fuckin year so let’s do a Year in Review shall we

in terms of internet and fandom life, that is. my real life has been atrociously boring but who cares about real life amirite folx

january probably the only calm month of the year.  i spent the first day of the month watching the brazilian inauguration in burgos, spain with one headphone in, while ordering for my family in a restaurant where nobody spoke english (my sister speaks decent spanish, but my whole family has like 8194814 food restrictions so it kind of went past her level of ability). translating between spanish and english with portuguese in one year was kind of awesome. i watched bodyguard and it was amazing!  what else...in january i briefly owned the issue of spanish GQ with Luka on the cover which i then forgot about until november. other than that...? nada.  the calm before the storm. (fav music)

february was so long ago that i keep forgetting how insane its 28 days were.  probably the wildest month of the year really. i got involved in an absolutely batshit and exclusive group chat with a famous person’s family member (which must remain confidential). it was all sunshine and rainbows for a week and a half and it then devolved into the most absolutely insane Lord of the Flies situation ever--it turned into 1 main chat and then 1 chat that was less puritanical than the main chat, and that chat spawned another chat that didn’t trust the previous chat, and then that chat had a massive argument and a like 6-person bitchy chat modded by a gay guy who does voodoo (shoutout to ALCIDES) spawned from that one.  i made it into every level of group chat and was asked by the tiny bitchy chat to spy on the other bitchy chat (i did not lol). i was a member of the tiny bitchy chat until i got a new phone and was logged out of whatsapp for like a month.  these words can’t even convey what this chat was like--oh and did i mention it was all conducted in only my 3rd-best language? it’s no wonder my weird ass survived middle school almost entirely unscathed.  as this was winding down, on the very last day of the month, I found out about Justin’s involvement in the SNC-Lavalin scandal and decided to go public about my years-long boner for him; Lavscam definitely changed the course of the rest year ~ Oh, also i began helping to repair a friendship that had had some Drama go down so that was p cool ~ (fav music)

march was a Time. The insanity of lavscam helped me finally finish the macdeau I started writing the previous December when a bunch of tungelr people called me disgusting for writing it.  i wrote my first straight-up serious explicit porn in years which has wound up being the third-longest thing i’ve ever published on ao3. Also, Hozier released Wasteland, Baby! which made a huge impact on me as well.  i spent like half of march staying up till 3:30 am writing said Long Fic, and i was firmly in the closet about stanning manu. also justin almost got a vote of no confidence or something and he got busted for eating a chocolate bar during a parliamentary all-nighter.  (fav music)

in april i wrote a ton of fanfic thanks to declining mental health(tm).  i think this is when i started my emmanuyell insta account and became really into making weird edits (which i still love doing just...don’t anymore.)  i started meeting some cool people thanks to macdeau.  what else happened in april? i feel like it wasn’t actually too eventful other than writing a lot of fanfic and being Annoyed about manu.  feel free to jog my memory lol.  oh i think i wrote “Okay so who from the French national team are we gonna ship Manu with” on twitter after seeing photos of manu + antoine griezmann at the World Cup but nothing came of that...at that time... (fav music)

may saw me having to deal with my shit mental health and up my meds but that seems to have had a good effect because i seem to not be too depressed to write in the winter/fall anymore! it was the 2nd anniversary of manu’s election and at the Christchurch Call in paris, macdeau took that amazing fairytale princess photo together that was completely unrivalled in Gay Shippy Feels moments until ivan went out of his way to kiss luka during the el clásico gameplay last wednesday. someone wrote ao3′s first griezmanu drabble and at the end manu gets down on his knees in front of antoine, takes off his shoes for him, and sucks his dick, and i achieved another state of being entirely.  my sister graduated from grad school and when we went down to DC for the weekend i went to eat at this restaurant manu famously ate at while there and ordered the same stuff he did and i have no idea how he consumed all that grease.  i learned about the song O Come, O Come, Emmanuel *snort*. i feel like other things happened in may too?  OH YES--i got the idea for my magnum opus, Trophy Boyfriend, and started to write it. the first scene i wrote was justin blowing manu in the hallway. then the same day i wrote the scene at the airport (which was the ending for a solid month and half till i realized it shouldn’t be), and the saddest scene in the fic--but we’ll stop to open presents.  oh! and i stumbled across the macronists discord chat which is such a delightful little community *weepy sniffles* (fav music)

june was Eventful.  a french neonazi on tumblr told me to go let manu fuck me in the ass because i was a fucking degenerate.  what a start!  then came the ceremony in which manu awarded everyone on the french national team the legion of honor medal and the way he and antoine looked at each other was truly...Wait it was the 3rd Gay Shippy Feels moment of the year.  as soon as the ceremony was over i wrote a fic about it and haven’t looked back.  between this + watching almost every 2018 World Cup game and the women’s world cup (during which I cried during argentina’s last game because of that miraculous penalty) i finally achieved my years-long goal of getting into Futbol(TM).  Antoine dropped his spotify playlist and my crush on him turned into Intense Love (TM) and also he introduced me to some legit awesome artists.  which led to (fav music)

july, in which i wrote “ça c’est ma dope” which is definitely the best thing i’ve written since i wrote “modernity towering in front of the sky” almost exactly 10 years before. got embroiled in Soccer Transfer Drama and learned its pain for the first time (unfortunately, since i wound up attaching my heart-wagon to barça’s Suddenly Least Favorite Player, the transfer drama pain has...never ended) became a full-fledged culé, O the joy O the honor.  i wanted to ship antoine with someone on the team, which in their current chemistry-less season is a real challenge, but after seeing a few photos i decided it would be fun to casually ship antoine + ivan rakitic (partially because, ever since i went from Enemies to Lovers with the croatia NT during the World Cup, he was one of the only players i knew anything about other than messi, suárez, and piqué lmao). while looking on ao3 to see what kind of headcanons people had about him--and the fic is definitely in general better than what’s out there about antoine, which is perplexing because antoine is much easier to write than ivan--i found That Amazing Rakidric Fic and thought “oh wait that ship makes a lot of sense” and started also shipping ivan and luka with the fire of a thousand suns.  oh and my air conditioner was broken for like 3 weeks. i worked on more fics, seriously outlining the path of Trophy Boyfriend, and my music taste was killer. (fav music)

in august i finished Trophy Boyfriend in my neighborhood Starbucks after writing the scene that was giving me the most trouble (the scene at the beginning where they’re organizing their book collection). the fic has made multiple people cry and people disagree on whether justin’s choice at the end was the right one and god i’m so proud of it.  Instantly went on to write ‘i might not mind,’ a lively lighthearted Friends to Lovers ivantoine~ romp which was definitely going to be a one-off and i was definitely not going to get an extra celeb crush out of it,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, (fav music)

in september ivantoine became A Thing in my mind and it’s a whole ongoing slow-burn character-arcy series that has taken a very different turn than i had expected. i’m not saying it’s like, the most deep writing of all time, but it’s gone to some interesting places emotionally. honestly, ships and boners aside, the concept of a person who made some really stupid homophobia 101 comments many years ago slowly realizing over and over again that they have gay feelings for a man who seems rather comfortable with gayness is a fascinating one and one that’s really cool to explore in writing.  Or at least, i think so.  in many ways ivan is my most unreliable narrator because of the many layers of Discomfort, Emotion and Repression at play in the fic while he’s interacting with this pretty cheery and uncomplicated seeming-dude who’s still perceptive enough to sort of know what’s going on (and that’s not even adding in the star player/falling from grace former rockstar dynamic!!!)  i know in the current climate it’s Not Allowed to write about someone who said a bad, but luckily i’m too old to give a Fuck. ivantoine is hard to write but it’s my bff’s favorite ship of mine and has a few other excited fans on ao3 which tbh is kind of an accomplishment considering i made it up out of thin air and it’s not something you’d ever think would be a thing. instantly also developed ‘getting called out about ivan by a child on the internet’ as a goal.  and...i achieved my dream of leading high holiday services!!! (fav music)

october had more high holiday services and i worked a lot on certain fics (including d*janfic which would be fun to finish). i came up with the idea of a Very Long Rakidric Fic based on the translation of a gorgeous croatian folk song i sang in college (Janko fell asleep under the poplar/My dear and beloved/My beautiful dark eyes/Look at me/Under the poplar's golden branch/My dear and beloved/My beautiful dark eyes/Look at me/I tore off the golden branch/My dear and beloved/My beautiful dark eyes/Look at me--in which the golden branch is a reference to a way to get into the underworld). decided to start quarter-assedly learning croatian for fun.  Fun...ha.  other than fangirling a lot and watching the croatian NT play, october was pretty uneventful? i think? Justin got reelected and mauricio didn’t ;( (fav music)

in november i finally achieved my dream of having a literal child on the internet call me out about being attracted to a homophobe.  (they were a madridista even!) accidentally started writing some more rakidric and now i’m seriously hooked.  also accidentally came out of the closet about the secret crush i’d been harboring on luka modric and then one fateful day in the ihop on 14th st i realized i’d had this crush already and repressed it from my memory. Don’t do that kids! now it’s Hurting Really Bad. Ivan dropped the most pathetic and candid interview like...ever and i hope “¿Cómo puede disfrutar uno? Jugando al fútbol. ¿Cómo se siente mi hija pequeña cuando le quitan un juguete? Triste. Yo me siento igual. Me han quitado la pelota, me siento triste” goes down in the history of most epic futbol quotes of all time.  (still haven’t actually been able to watch this because no one has uploaded it anywhere)  What else...............Am i forgetting anything? i celebrated my birthday with @tender-vittles in epic fashion after two years of Not doing that, and turned 32 going on 15.  enjoyed my first-ever “x reader” fic (zlatko dalic x reader LOL) and finished “drive your plow over the bones of the dead” which was real fucking good. i saw hozier live and it was a religious experience and i unexpectedly cried during nina cried power and then called myself “Luka B” when ordering at the classy taco bell across the street after getting a glimpse of alexxx ryan in the flesh. (fav music)

now it’s december and my seasonal depression is a little worse than it’s been the past few years but i’m managing.  still shipping and writing and i just got called out about ivan again last week.  i’m 2 for 2 here!  el clásico was boring but also it was gay and my heart my heart my heart ! Anything could happen in the last 10 days of this year and honestly...I’m pretty sure I’m ready.

Most importantly this year, despite it being not that great in a lot of ways, I developed a lot more self confidence, made many important realizations, and became a lot more peaceful (despite how this post makes me sound) and wiser and less bitter and pessimistic.  And i became outspoken enough about antisemitism on the left to lose friends over it...3 for 3.  i can’t say i’m displeased with these developments.

Hasta 2020! <3

[sleepychihuahua]

MCs as Ayakashi Suitor Descendants

WARNING: Some spoilers ahead.

Ayakashi RR is it’s own universe separate from the Love 365 games, but what if it wasn’t? Ignoring EITM (since the history and rules of their yōkai are so different), maybe some of the MCs are descended from the Ayakashi suitors?

So far, I’ve only finished Koga and currently somewhere halfway with Ginnojo, but from what I do know about the suitors, I imagine that for the Dawn Faction:

Ginnojo and MPDCTY MC

Koga and MFW MC

Kuya and SITS MC

Yura and FILA MC

Aoi and IYAT MC

Ginnojo and MPDCTY MC

Ginnojo reminds me of the MPDCTY MC. I only played Kimura’s stories, but from what I gathered, MPDCTY MC’s main traits are: she’s a big eater, a Judo black belt, and has a strong sense of justice.

Mizuchi dragons seem to be one of the longer-living ayakashi since Ginnojo is apparently 54 and still looks young, so he could potentially be alive when MPDCTY MC was born and growing up.

He’s most likely a grandpa. The game takes place during the Taisho Period (1912-26) so he could be a great-grandpa, but he’s so shy around women. If he doesn’t end up with Futaba/ARR MC, then it would take a while for him to interact with another woman and start a family with her.

He trained MC how to fight and use her water powers. Sparring is normal and their training room/backyard normally floods from the water that they fought with.

She could never beat him.

They probably caused the family grief with how much they eat. Imagine the food budget. They probably eat extra large pork cutlet curry and beef bowls at least two/three times a day.

Ginnojo would read little MC his favorite books after meal times and tell her about the Shinsengumi and their convictions. These stories and Ginnojo’s love for his country were what influenced her to become a detective.

She becomes a Shinsengumj geek, and she and little Kiyonori became Shinsengumi BFFs. Grandpa Ginnojo is highly uncomfortable when they would team up against him to hear stories that he already told 567 times.

Ginnojo is always flustered when MC gets crushes and tells him about it. But he’s also there to kick ass if anyone makes her cry.

Koga and MFW MC

They like to drink.

Honestly, that’s my biggest argument. I only played Yamato’s stories (can’t bring myself to cheat on him with the other guys even though I love Ren and Saeki’s characters...) so I don’t know how different MFW MC is in other routes.

But MFW MC’s funniest character trait is her love of shochu.

Koga mentioned that only few Ayakashi have long lifespans and in his route, he has an illness known as the “carnage” that some Oni Ogre have. Koga’s probably dead by the time MFW MC was born.

If there was a cure for the “carnage” and he’s still alive, he would drink with MC once she was of legal age. The two would have a Sake vs Shochu argument every time.

Koga’s probably a stubborn, old man. He can’t handle not moving around and doing work even when he should be resting. And he feels embarrassed when his granddaughter takes care of him. But MFW MC is just as stubborn and cooks for him, does chores that he can’t do, and makes sure he doesn’t overwork himself.

That was how she developed wife-skills

MC got his kind and strong nature from him. She’s willing to help others, although she didn’t inherit his natural entrepreneurship skills. Not to say she’s an idiot. She probably took business as her major because she was exposed to it. Taking a page from the PARTY version, MFW MC opens up a flower arranging business

Kuya and SITS MC

There are two types of writers: ones that actually write and publish things and ones that don’t and just keep the ideas in their heads.

Like Koga, Kuya is most likely dead or just very, very old when SITS MC was born.

I haven’t even unlocked Kuya’s route yet, but I found the contrast and similarities between him and SITS MC kinda funny.

SITS MC daydreams. A lot. It’s how she writes.

And then Kuya is here:

If Kuya’s alive when SITS MC was little, they probably took naps together under the shade of the mikan tree in their backyard with Kuya using one of his wings as a protective blanket over her.

They’d also go to the mountains where no one would see them and fly around to stretch their wings.

I don’t know if Kuya actually starts writing stories during his route, but if he does, he would tell little MC bedtime stories...

...then proceeds to fall asleep halfway through before MC does.

He’s an old man now, so he sleeps much more often. MC doesn’t mind and finishes the stories for him so she could tell it to him before his nap times.

Watching movies became normal since they don’t have to waste energy talking and can instead sit on the couch and focus on the screen until one falls asleep and the other daydreams scenarios.

SITS MC inherited her workaholic tendencies from Kuya’s kid/her father, who was taught by Kuya’s wife to work hard. That’s why she can handle working as an assistant manager and lyricist for Revance.

The band would find her napping with Little Yamada under the tree in the yard in a regular basis when she hits writer’s block. Poor girl would wake up to Takashi’s monster mode every time.

Yura and FILA MC

Sweets

Haven’t played a full FILA route yet but I’ve read reviews and read the prologue so I kinda have a general idea of the FILA MC.

If Yura didn’t end up with Futaba, he ended up with a confectioner. In this case, Yura is probably FILA MC’s father. He is already 1000+ years old, so another handful of decades probably wouldn’t mean much to him. It took a while for him to find his true love without being blinded by his love of sugar.

Father, grandfather, or great-grandfather, Yura’s alive when FILA MC was growing up. He doted on her and would always take her out to eat cakes, so he when she decided to become a pastry chef, he was happy.

She would always have Yura taste test her desserts. The two were inseparable and practically lived in the kitchen.

Ever since Aoi made that cake, Yura was fascinated with hybrid desserts a d new food combinations.

FILA MC tries to add sweet-bean jelly to almost everything and makes huge batches for Yura’s birthday. She loves seeing the happy look in her father’s face.

She even makes desserts with a bit of spice for her Uncle Gaku since she loves him just as equally and as thanks for always helping pay for the ingredients she needs.

Outside of sweets, Yura would encourage small animals to their backyard. Little FILA MC would play with them almost every day.

If Yura was freed from his curse, he would play his flute for her (sometimes with Gaku on drums) and teach her how to play the instrument so they could have a duet.

Aoi and IYAT MC

Art runs in the veins.

IYAT MC grew up with Aoi’s paintings and with her powers as a Satori, she can feel his emotions and thoughts for each one.

Aoi’s probably still alive since he’s 16 during the story, so he’s most likely to be a grandpa.

IYAT loves watching him paint. Her favorites are the portraits of his loved ones and she always feels warm and loved when he paints her.

The old paintings of his wife and kids in their old homes were what inspired IYAT MC to be an interior designer. She wanted to create that warmth she saw in his paintings.

She learned to paint by imitating him and they would often spend a whole day together just going out in nature to paint.

IYAT MC often painted her three childhood friends and would do commissions for them.

Aoi made sure that his kids had good work ethic he doesn’t want any deadbeats like that tengu so he taught IYAT MC as well to not be lazy. Recipes he learned from Raccord was passed down to her.

Aoi taught IYAT MC to make sure to not use her powers to invade privacy unless necessary, but also to not become bitter towards his powers like he was.

She didn’t use her powers on Koichi until she saw him with his mistress, which made her depressed. She couldn’t help but think that if she had read his heart earlier, she wouldn’t be feeling the pain of being cheated on.

But if following Koichi’s route, it was her powers that let her forgive Koichi when she saw how he was changing and truly learning to love her. She stayed with him because she saw that there was a part of his heart that thought he would grow to love her because he wouldn’t let go of her as a baby.

IYAT MC designed Aoi’s and her grandmother’s new living room. She went all out to make sure her beloved grandparents will be comfortable and happy. Aoi can always sense her love for them because of it and was embarrassed but happy the first time he stepped inside.

And that’s it for the Dawn Faction! I don’t really have any ideas for the other suitors since they’re not out yet and I haven’t read all of the other Voltage stories. I have a vague idea for Kagemaru and Toichiro but not enough to write about. Maybe once I read more.

Anyways, thanks for reading and I hope you guys liked it!