#AND ALL WE HAD OF HIM AT THAT POINT WAS HARVEST MOON

[sophfandoms53]

It cannot be understated just how unwell Striker has made me since December 2021, this goofy sadistic snake cowboy has completely altered my brain chemistry in a way that I have never been able to recover from

[cravetive]

𝚆𝙷𝙴𝙽 𝙸𝚃 𝚁𝙰𝙸𝙽𝚂

☾ ⋆*･ Pairings: Meteorologist! Jin x Fem!reader

☾ ⋆*･ Synopsis: after many failed relationships you find yourself struggling to open up to new connections but once you overhear that your timid colleague Seokjin has a crush on you, you set out to play a game of temptation where somewhere in the process, you come face to face with the sudden realization that the weather is not the only unpredictable thing.

☾ ⋆*･ Warnings: SMUT! workplace/office au, Jin is quiet and innocent until he's not, fingering, oral sex! ( M! receiving ), dirty talk, creampie ( hehe) , teasing, unprotected sex, hair pulling, hardcore, a bit angsty ( im an angst slut leave me alone ) , foreplay , slight dom/sub dynamics, kissing, biting/marking, we will pray Y/n gets her life together.

☾ ⋆*･ Authors note: I wish I could tell you what I've done but this is what my brain produces when I'm on 5 hours of sleep.

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ Word count: 10 K ( for what reason?)

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Ever since you were conscious you would often find yourself lost in the sky - entrained on the sun, the moon, and the stars but most importantly on the weather. Even before you could walk You wondered what caused thunders to ripple through the clouds, worried over the sun that disappeared during rainfall. You were fixated, overly obsessed and it is what had led you to become a research meteorologist and whilst some found the profession to be boring and fruitless (your parents), there was nothing in the world that you loved most then to predict cloudy skies and cold nights. Being able to observe, understand, and therefore explain the earth's atmospheric phenomenons offers you a sense of gratification.

On the other hand you couldn’t say you ran with the same luck when it came to love and relationships, your long list of exes and failed talking stages were enough scientific evidence to prove that. Things just never ended well between you and whoever fate decided to send your way. you could never decipher if it was due to the lack of communication, lack of interest, or a little bit of both that prevented you from harvesting anything solid with those you fell in love with but it always left you high and dry. It wasn’t like you were a hopeless romantic either, yet the instincts you had when it came to forecasting sunny skies were just not there when it came to romance.

To put it bluntly, your relationships just didn’t last and it had brought you to a point where you questioned all your romantic interactions.

How long will this one last? How long until this one ends? Will we see each other in public and turn the other way?

It's why you struggled to get your feelings across most times, it's why you found it almost impossible to tell that certain person who sat across from you at work how he made you feel.

The timid and reserved Junior meteorologist didn’t catch your attention at first, always keeping to himself and rarely participating in any after work activities with your co-workers, which had made it almost impossible for you to even notice him. that was until 3 weeks ago during a mandatory work dinner. Whilst on a small bathroom break you had unintentionally walked into a game of truth and dare between your colleagues where by perhaps fate you had eavesdropped on the confession of that very same drunken man.

You had opted to feign ignorance, slipping back into the table as if nothing had happened all whilst deciding to commence a cruel game against the meek man. You would find yourself teasing him, subtly flirting until his cheeks turned red and his words turned into stutters. At first it was a childish fun ruse but as time progressed you found yourself looking in his direction more often, entranced by his smile and quiet charisma.

You were doomed and yet, it didn’t stop you from taunting him. small winks and little comments of how good he looked in his baseball caps and soft sweaters, causing him to often jolt as a response. It was harmless until it wasn’t, until you started imagining him between your legs, his large and skillful hands wrapped around your neck.

“for fucks sake” Daiyu, your best friend and colleague huffed as she ran towards the entrance, her freshly styled copper hair drenched with rain that poured from the sunny sky. You giggled, closing your umbrella and entering the building, your heels squeaking against the marbled floors. Daiyu followed after you, a trail of curses falling from her mouth whilst her hands frantically wiped at her wet clothes.

“I always tell you to carry an umbrella and you never listen” you sighed.

“It was a 30% chance!” she exclaimed, reaching to frantically press on the elevator button.

“I should sue you guys” Daiyu groaned.

You looked back at her, taking in her flustered and soaked appearance, deciding not to pass further judgment. Daiyu was as stubborn as a bull and anything that you chose to say would just  go  through one ear and out the other anyways. you reached into your purse and grabbed a napkin, extending it out for her to take. She snatched it urgently and dabbed on her face, emitting a groan of frustration at the inconvenience the sky had caused her.

“It was so sunny and warm outside” she complained, which caused you to laugh loudly, both of you stepping into the elevator as the doors slid open.

“Looks can be deceiving Daiyu” you noted, watching as the doors closed in front of you.

Daiyu smirked, disregarding your statement and focusing on the current situation you were in. her mind going back to the late-night conversation you both had shared 2 days ago over wine and expensive cheese. She leaned over closer to you, her eyebrows teasingly raising while you shared a bewildered expression on your face.

“what?” you asked, concerned with her inquisitive glances.

“I guess the same thing can be said about Jin,” Daiyu winked, a hint of excitement in her tone. She goaded you to speak on the subject, but you rolled your eyes in response.

“I bet he is a real beast in the sheets” Daiyu raised her eyebrows.

“Daiyu please, this is not the time or place to have this conversation” you scolded - eyes fixed on the numbers that flashed on the small screen above the elevator panel. 

“I guess you are deceiving - look at you all serious now like you aren't torturing that poor man.”

“Daiyu” your eyes widened and she was lucky you were both alone in the elevator - out of hearing range of any nosy employee’s. 

“I didn’t share that with you so that you can hold it over my head” you snapped, making a quick escape as soon as the elevator doors opened.

“oh come on!” she shouted after you, the sound of her heels echoing inside the office as she chased after you, her arm interlinking with yours when she caught up. you didn’t intend to avoid the topic, in fact you found it relieving to be able to speak to someone freely about it but what Daiyu was trying to indicate with her previous statements were by far completely illogical. 

Jin was but a shy and reserved guy, not the kind that tried to deceive by putting on appearances. 

How else was he able to contain himself by your constant teasing and flirting, if he wasn’t.

“we will talk about this later” you declared, giving her a soft shove towards her desk. Daiyu pouted, providing you a saddened glance whilst reluctantly dragging herself to her desk where she threw herself into her chair in rather dramatic defeat. You giggled at the scene she produced and walked across the room, reaching your own desk.

Seokjin was already there, too focused on the screen in front of him to notice your arrival. You took this time to take in his appearance. the sweater he wore accentuating his biceps and broad shoulders, the pair of glasses that sat on the bridge of his nose causing a pulsation between your thighs - lured by the image of him crawling over you with them on. You cleared your throat quickly, grabbing his attention and interrupting your perverted train of thought.

He glanced up at you, cheeks already turning pink as he took in your presence.

“Good Morning Mr. Kim” you whispered, offering him a smug smile whilst sliding into your chair. It took a moment for him to respond, his eyes briefly falling on the low v neck blouse you decided to wear today (one of your many little tricks of course). His lips parted, a gulp traveling down his throat. He quickly removed his eyes from your accentuated breasts, dragging his attention back to his screen.

“G-good Morning” he stumbled on the phrase, his tone quiet and faint.

you smiled out of satisfaction, unable to suppress the butterflies in your stomach that only he managed to make flutter. Seokjin is sexy in the most subtle ways; he doesn’t even try and yet he could make you squirm in your seat like a schoolgirl. His full lips, his deep intense eyes, and dorky smile kindled a pressure in your lower abdomen that you often tried to conceal by crossing your legs. 

“I like that color on you, you look good” you complimented, offering Jin a small smirk.

Jin glanced down at his sweater, his hands smoothing out the cashmere deep blue material. He had liked the color, had even thought it was a nice sweater when he first picked it out at the store but having its tincture complimented by you now, gave it a new feeling - it felt softer against his skin.

“thank you” he almost muttered.

You nodded happily, bringing your hair into a ponytail as you always did when beginning the day. Jin’s eyes hesitantly trailed your exposed neck, carving out the smoothness of your skin and studying each detail of the necklace that hung there - soon halting at the sight of your lips, a breath hitching in his throat. 

“You like what you see, Mr. Kim?” you asked, your eyes sparking with the realization of his discreet stare.

Jin sat up,your voice startling him out of his daze - his eyes now looking in every direction but yours.

“cause you can see more if you want, you just have to ask” your voice was a mere whisper and Jin could feel every hair in his body stand up from your tone alone. There was a long silence, your eyes intensively studying his composure. He moved his attention back on his computer screen, deciding it would be best to ignore the comment that made his heart run laps inside his chest all together.

“Hey Jin” you called, his eyes quickly moving back to you with hesitation.

“I'm only joking” you lied.

You would've allowed him to see your entire soul if he had just asked.

The day had turned sour rather quickly, the entire office thrown into a frenzy by the threat of an incoming spring storm and it had left you running in circles all throughout the building, your heels beginning to jab into your feet painfully- leaving your soles red and sore. You groaned, stepping into the cafeteria for the first time in the day, finally allowing yourself a small break amidst the hysteria. You needed coffee and you needed it fast. Your heavy eyes scanned the cabinet in search for your favorite mug - propping yourself on your toes for a better view. 

“Where the hell did I put you?” you muttered under your breath, your hands pushing away various mugs in an attempt to find the deep emerald one you always used. Your shoulders ached, weighed down by the tumultuous day and your eyes burned, the result of staring at your computer screen for 4 hours straight. Not finding your mug would be the last straw, the drop of water that would make you spill over. You groaned loudly and leaned against the counter, your hand flying to cover your face in frustration while you balanced from one foot to the other, trying to ease the ache shooting up your legs.

“Are you looking for this?” a quiet and familiar voice asked.

You raised your head slowly, capturing a view of the man standing in front of you, your mug held comfortably in his hand. Exhaustion creeped through your body, leading you to bubble with irrational anger but as you prepared to berate the individual who had seized your precious mug, you took a moment to study their fingers, soon realizing they were the hands you melted over ever so often, concluding who the culprit behind the theft was.

Jin offered you a concerned glance, his profound sepia eyes blinking slowly as if expecting a response. You remained silent, losing yourself in his stare. the ache on your limbs suddenly evaporating for those short seconds, a wave of serenity settling deep inside of you. you shook your head slowly, unable to break eye contact as he made time stop around you.

All urgency to resume your pending tasks halted whilst you stood in front of him - The buzzling in the office growing quiet as your eyes slowly traced his features.

“I can wash it out if you want, I’m done anyways” Jin offered, a small smile forming on his face.

Your attention crawled to his mouth, inspecting his plump and soft lips, lips you wanted to press yours against, lips that were smeared with the cold foam of his coffee, foam you imagined on other parts of his body for you to lick.

“n-no, it's okay” this time it was you who stuttered; it was you who grew flustered.

The room fell silent as you remained stunned by his intense stare, your mind flowing with ideas that were neither appropriate nor sane. You were in deep shit, and you knew it, your heart pressed against your chest begging to jump into the hands of the man standing before you whilst your mind yelled that he was like everyone else, like every guy you had ever met. The one with the soft eyes and quick lies.

“You uh have something” you gestured to his mouth, making him aware of the leftover foam on his lips.

He lowered his head in embarrassment, his hand quickly flying to wipe away at his face. his eyes trailed away from yours, causing you to inhale sharply.

“Did I get it?” he asked, turning back to you. His cheeks still flushed with shame.

You inspected his lips once again, taking in their smoothness and soft pink color, pictured them gracing your skin softly - leaving their imprint on your skin.

“Here I’ll-” you offered, reaching forward and closing the gap between you both. you leisurely wiped away at the top of his lip with your thumb, removing all the residual foam left there. His lips were warm under your touch, your breaths growing short and unruly due to the sensation.

You could feel his stare fixed on you as you aided him, your cheeks becoming rogue at the sudden intimacy of the situation. Jin’s mouth parted as if he had wanted to say something but even if he had you doubted you would have been able to hear him over the hammering of your heart. The euphoric feeling dazed you out of all self restraint - luring you to act upon your intrusive thoughts .

you found yourself losing yourself in the sea of brown that were his eyes again, knowing you could drown and subsequently, dipped your foam covered thumb into your mouth without a second thought.

You collected the sugar that had once rested on his lips on your tongue and allowed it to rest there. A pleasure filled hum echoing from within your chest - your eyes fluttering shut at the satisfaction the fulfillment of your craving caused. You remained stuck there, your brain unable to generate anything but utter bliss. 

“hey! Is there any creamer lef…”

The voice of the intern entering the cafeteria was like cracking thunder, your body jerking as a life vest was being thrown at you, aiding you from going under. Your eyes shot open in realization, body tensing at the action you had just mindlessly committed but Jin didn’t appear to be as startled as you, his eyes firmly held on your lips. It felt like your whole body was on fire and it was only then when you noted the damp fabric of your panties pressed against your clit. 

Both you and Jin turned your heads quickly, eyes landing on the intern who stood shocked by the door, his mouth held ajar. You blinked quickly; your brain unable to register what had just taken place. it was as if everything inside you had been electrocuted and you couldn’t even find the strength to defend yourself against the silent accusation the interns eyes made.

You dreadfully took a step back from Jin, lowering your gaze once he looked back at you - you cleared your throat quickly before stumbling out of the shared space. The sound of your heels leaving echoes inside of Jin’s head.

You had deduced 2 things from that brief encounter. The first being you and Jin were beyond screwed - interns liked to talk, liked to share and gossip didn't take long to spread within the office and secondly, that being alone in a room with Jin was dangerous, far more than you had anticipated.

“Yup, it's been sent to the group chat” Daiyu nodded, pushing a spoon full of yogurt into her mouth.

You sighed, covering your face in agony.

As expected the details of your little encounter with Jin had been shared all throughout the office with the intern taking quite the creative liberty of disclosing details you were sure never happened. You groaned loudly, pushing your food away. 

“Oh god” you whispered, “we work together, you know I can lose my job right?” you stared at her, wide eyed but your friend didn’t join your panic, instead a small giggle escaped her lips and your eyebrows intertwined in confusion.

“Do you find this funny?” you yelled, throwing a balled-up napkin at her head.

“Hey! Let’s use our words” she laughed, causing you to throw your head back in defeat.

“What did you think was going to happen Y/n? Jin is a man and you are a woman - i'm surprised you haven't humped in the janitors closet yet” she mused. 

You pressed your hands against your temples, trying to stop yourself from imagining the both of you doing the mentioned act. 

“Relax, it’s not that bad” she responded, “besides their just rumors, okay?” you knew she was trying to calm you, trying to bring you back from the trepidation you had been succumbing to during the last few days but her words didn’t offer any relief, anxiety running through your entire body quickly and mercilessly.

“you know I almost believed it but then he added that Jin had his hands wrapped around your waist and I had to debunk it” Daiyu shared, swallowing the yogurt in her mouth “cause we both know that boy would simply combust if he even graced his finger tips against your skin.”

You shot bullets in her direction, how was she able to make a joke out of all of this when you were literally falling apart? your job on the line, your reputation. Everything you had worked so hard to get and maintain all down the gutter for a man and Yet, there wasn’t even a hint of regret in your thoughts, in fact the only reason why you were so stressed out in the first place was for the simple fact that you were caught,caught doing something so frivolous and yet the whole office was in an uproar about it.

If you knew you would be at the brink of getting fired over lingering stares and kinship, you would’ve at least given yourself the liberty of kissing him.

“Hey, you are in your head again” Daiyu yelled, snapping her fingers in your face. you blinked in her direction and sighed, turning away once again.

“Can this get any worse?” you complained.

“I think it just might,” Daiyu winced.

You glanced back at her and turned your head in the direction of her widened eyes. The director had stepped into the cafeteria, and he was walking straight to you. you felt your body tremble, your brain preparing for the worst. You quickly stood up, your entire nervous system beginning to shut down.

“Ms. Y/n” he greeted, you stood completely still, unable to bring any air into your lungs as your knees threatened to collapse.

“Mr. Han,” your voice trembled.

Daiyu stood up quickly, putting down her yogurt and offering your boss a 90 degree bow before standing up straight, giving you a panicked glance.

“Ms. Y/n do you have a moment? I would like to go over some things in my office” your heart dropped, your palms clammy. You soon became very aware of every vein in your body, pulsating strongly against your skin.

your throat went dry, sandpaper rubbing against the other as you tried to form a coherent response.

“I uh I – yeah”

He turned quickly without another word, his steps firm and demanding, you followed behind him like a lost puppy, glancing back at Daiyu; your eyes brimmed with tears. she attempted to give you a smile through her concerned expression but even her movements faltered when she offered you a thumbs up. You were screwed, you had gone too far in your little game and now you were facing the consequences.

The walk back to Mr. Han’s office felt eternal, passing coworkers who stared and mumbled amongst each other. You were dragging your feet at this point, your heart plummeting into despair the closer you got to his office. In retrospect you didn’t feel contrition towards the event that had taken place, one does not lament over things they enjoyed but now was not the time for you to ponder on the things you did or didn't regret.

one word from your boss and you would be sent packing with all of your hopes and dreams.

You entered his office quietly, brain swarmed with negative thoughts - predicting the words that would soon empty from his mouth.

‘YOU’RE FIRED’ 

The unspoken yet inevitable words rang inside your ears - tears swelling in your eyes out of mere anticipation. 

You let out a long breath, hoping that for a second it could appease your mind but it was no use, you were a nervous wreck and it was evident by the way your boss stared at you whilst he sat behind his desk. You decided to solve math problems in your head, a method that most times distracted you from distressing situations but as you began to find the answer to your first algebra problem you felt a presence next to you and when you glanced over, your legs buckled.

“please take a seat guys” your boss requested.

You tried to move your limbs, but your feet were stuck to the ground, eyes fixed on Jin whilst he avoided your gaze and pushed out his chair taking a seat as instructed. He didn't greet you as he tended to do nor did he give you one of his famous small introverted smiles you often looked forward to. It was as if you weren’t even there but you were and it was as if he couldn’t care less. 

Ouch…

he was tense, you could see it and It was all your fault. you were fucked, royally fucked. Your shaky hands reached for your own chair, hesitantly slipping next to him.

“I can assume you know why I’ve asked the both of you here” Mr. Han began, your stomach somersaulting painfully. You glanced over at Jin who remained silent, not a speck of anxiousness in his demeanor. Why was he so relaxed? Had he just accepted his fate? Your face contorted with conflict and then turned to face your boss, a long weighed sigh leaving your body.

“I want to apologize, I know that it wasn’t ethical and I assume full responsibility-“ you began rambling, your mouth going painfully dry. your boss stared back at you like you had 3 heads and your voice faded into thin air, further apprehension spreading inside of you.

“Y/n, I can attest you are really good at your job but why are you apologizing for the weather?” Mr. Han chuckled. you blinked slowly, unable to understand his words.

“huh?”

“look, we might be facing a storm soon and I want to send a group of you over to our headquarters in Yeosu, they will be hit the hardest and in all honesty they need all the help they can get”

Relief and embarrassment flow through you as his intentions are made clear. you let out a small nervous giggle struggling with the intrusive desire to slap yourself across the face.

“I can go on my own,” Jin interrupted, and you quickly turned to him. his face cold and expressionless, your stomach dropping once again and all those bad feelings that had previously  swallowed you, began eating at you all over again.

“I'm sure Ms. Y/n  here has a lot of work on her plate and I'm sure I can do most of the work myself.”

His words were rational, made sense even but you couldn’t stop yourself from thinking this was just the aftermath of the rumors that had been spreading. You understood him, being spoken about and stared at when most times all he wanted to do was go about undetected must’ve been uncomfortable, albeit it made your insides twist.

“oh i'm sure you are more than capable but there will be a lot to cover and I just don’t think you’ll be able to manage.”

“Then give me a team, Ms. Y/n can stay here with the others - I'm sure we will need coverage here too” Jin insisted. you couldn’t bring yourself to protest. It was probably the best idea. You didn’t want any more rumors to spread about the two of you, not when it made Jin treat you like this. The game was over - no longer did you find amusement in your actions, instead you started to regret toying with him in the first place. it was immature on your part and you wanted nothing more than to apologize for your childish ways.

“I can understand your consideration of Ms. Y/n but it wasn’t a request” Mr. Han stated, causing chills to go down your spine.

“the train tickets have been purchased, you will be departing tomorrow morning” your boss concluded.

Jin stood up first, walking out of the room without another word. You followed behind quickly, your head spinning in circles as you tried catching up to him. 

“Jin” you called, but he kept his pace - not bothering to look back at you.

“Jin” you repeated, your voice much louder this time. 

His steps slowed, a sigh falling from his lips before he turned to look at you - you couldn't make out the stare he held once his eyes met with yours but it made you feel like shit. This entire ordeal was making you question the kind of person you were and for the first time since you had begun playing mind games with the man, you had realized how fucked this entire thing was. 

“How can i help you Ms. Y/n” his tone had always been reserved but this time it was different - you could feel the chill from a mile away. 

“I just wanted to say I'm sorry” you breathed. 

“Okay” he answered. 

“Okay?” you questioned, taken aback by his response. 

“Okay” Jin reaffirmed before he spun around and left you standing alone and confused in the empty hallway. 

The train ride had been 3 long painful hours and even though all your colleagues had slept peacefully, including Daiyu who snored into your ear the entire trip you hadn’t been able to stop thinking of Jin. He avoided you like the plague the entire way to Yeosu. Putting on his headphones when it was only the two of you awake, making sure he was the first to exit the train once it arrived, and when you entered the shared home you and your colleagues would be staying in for the longevity of the trip, he intentionally chose the room furthest away from yours.

You decided to just let the situation be, there wasn’t anything you could do now and besides, it didn’t appear like he even wanted an apology. Maybe, seeking him out would only make things worse.

“Have you talked to him?” Daiyu asked, setting up a small satellite on the ground to assist the tracking of the storm.

“no” you muttered, writing down notes in your notepad “and quite frankly I don’t intend to Daiyu.”

“oh come on, we will be here for 2 more days and you guys are just gonna what? Pretend the other is not there? It's making me and everyone else uncomfortable” she complained.

“And what other options do I have? I tried to apologize but he just said okay, like what even is that? okay?!” you huffed with frustration.

“he even stayed in when we said we would go out for drinks” you whisper, the topic alone distracting you from the data you were collecting. The memory caused an ache in your chest, an ache that you didn’t like. It was a faint soreness that had accompanied you many times before, during nights of heartache and rejection, so imperceptible yet debilitating.

“The kid likes you, we know he likes you, you know he likes you, and you like him” Daiyu shrugs “why are you dragging this?” her tone was annoyed but she held a smile on her face.

“it's more complicated than that and you know that” you responded, rolling your eyes.

“ugh whatever keep eye fucking him for all I care” Daiyu groaned.

“Are you all done here? I'll wait in the car” you yelled, taking quick steps away from Daiyu.

“hey! We need to make sure it's stable!” Daiyu yelled out but you ignored her, pretending to be too far to hear her curses.

As predicted the storm had arrived ferociously. Wind ripping through the city, rain pouring harshly - turning the sky opaque. Your dry and pained eyes stared at the computer screen in front of you as you wrote yet another report, racing against mother nature in an attempt to keep up with the current weather. You hadn’t slept in the last 24 hours and the toll it had left was visible. The only thing keeping you awake being the loud crackles of thunder tearing into the sky. 

You had been locked in your room all day and you had no intentions on stepping out.

The rest of the group with the exception of Jin had left to track the storm, giving you hourly updates on the current situation and the damage the storm was leaving in its path. Knowing you were alone with him in the same house left an anxious haze in your system.

You allowed your eyes to flutter shut for a few seconds, giving them some moisture but your mind wandered to another place, drifting deeper into your consciousness - within the darkness of your tightly shut eyes you envisioned Jin’s capable hands. touching, roaming, rubbing. You retracted the image of his mouth, of his tongue. Sliding, licking, pulling. And then there it was, the pooling between your thighs, the pressure under your navel.

Your eyes opened quickly as another thunder rolled through the sky, bright lights seeping through your half-opened blinds, dragging you away from your salacious contemplations.

You needed to clear your mind, to provide your brain another task to focus on before it began to rot. An impulse surged through you, your body rising from the chair it had made a home out of and stepping out into the dark house. What was the worst that could happen? For Jin to ignore you? He was already doing that anyway.

Your steps were soft as you made your way to the kitchen, a cup of chamomile tea sounding delicious at the moment, it would help you fall asleep and above all it would shake away the anxiousness that gripped you. your mouth watered with the idea. 

Aside from the small creaks the foundation of the old home made against the strong wind outside- everything else was completely silent. The gray evening sky offering the only source of light throughout the space.

You reached into the coverts and pulled out a kettle, which you filled with water and set on the stove to boil. Your eyes wandered out the window, concerned with the raging weather that apparently had no intentions on stopping. You were worried for your team, hoping they had found shelter, and you were also worried about running into Jin. all the bravery you had suddenly found in those short seconds when you first decided to leave your room quickly fading away. you blinked slowly, trying to rid yourself of the exhaustion pressing on your body.

 You made mental plans of a warm shower and then finally some rest, if the thunder allowed it.

If your Jin ridened brain would allow it.

There was another crackle in the sky and then the sliding door in the dining room opened and slammed shut, your whole nervous system jolting as a loud scream escaped your mouth. you turned your head to access the damage the wind had probably caused but your made out a figure standing by the door. A drenched, heaving figure. You blinked rapidly, ensuring it wasn’t your imagination and once your brain awakened from its internal slumber you realized that the person standing there, dripping wet from head to toe was Jin.

“Jin?” you exclaimed “are you okay?”

Your feet moved quickly towards him, mind racing with weariness at the sight of him. His presence left a puddle on the floor, his rain slicked black hair stuck to his forehead. He nodded slightly, wanting to avoid further questioning. You reached into the closet nearby and pulled out a clean towel. 

He was shivering, mouth trembling as he stood there in complete silence.

“What were you doing outside? It's dangerous out there” your voice was stern, but you weren’t trying to reprimand him. Jin was a grown man, and you were sure he was aware of the current climate.

“I had forgotten my camera” he simply explained, holding up the canon T7 camera for you to see.

“Gosh, let me help you” you sighed, taking fast steps towards him. your mind was racing with ways you could help him, concerned with his well-being however once you were closer, all those thoughts stopped – paused by the view in front of you. Jin’s black t-shirt was glued to his body, the imprint of his torso visible through the wet material. His face dripped droplets of water as he stared at you with those eyes that you habitually melted over and you weren’t sure if it was due to the rain outside, but his skin appeared to glisten, accentuating the veins that crawled down his forearms and down his hands.

This wasn’t the time to look, to peer like you often did, not a moment to tease but your eyes couldn’t help trail down to his sweats that now due to the weight of the water they had absorbed sat just below his waist, his underwear peeking above them.

You cleared your throat, attempting to remain focused whilst your hands tended to the shivering man in front of you but once the towel touched his skin, his hand came up to grip yours. You looked up at him quickly, your brows knitting with concern. His eyes pierced through you and you recalled the reason why the both of you hadn’t spoken this entire time, remembered the way he had avoided you at all costs.

“don’t do that” his tone was low, a heaviness within it that you had never heard him use before.

“do what?” yours quivered, a crack forming at the last word.

“don’t provoke me,” Jin stated.

The ache returned inside your chest, the one that you hated so much and you felt weak. Your eyes faltered, blinking away from his gaze with a heavy sigh.

“Jin, I want to apologize again, I shouldn’t have-“ you began, unable to recognize the softness in your words - a knot embedding itself in your trachea.

“What are you apologizing for?” his expression was that of confusion and you felt intimidated. The question leaves you disoriented.

“what?” you asked.

“you shouldn’t apologize if you aren’t sorry.”

“but I am” you stood on those words, truly feeling culpable of the situation you had created due to your lack of self control, due to your habit of complicating things but Jin’s words held different meaning which you had missed due to your lack of sleep,or perhaps it was because you couldn’t concentrate on anything else besides the bulge that pressed against his drenched sweats.

 Jin was teasing you.

He stepped closer, his chest now mere inches from yours. His towering build caused you to become very aware of how tall he really was, you didn’t speak another word as the room suddenly shrunk 3 sizes, your breath trapped inside of your rib cages.

“I take pride in the kind of man that I am” he muttered, leaning his face towards yours. “im respectful – a well mannered man” Jin’s eyes trailed down to your lips and he watched them intently as they parted slightly. 

“I am a civil man” he whispered, his hand rising to caress the skin of your cheek softly - erupting goosebumps everywhere inside of you. the shy and concealed man you had come to know had disappeared, leaving no traces of innocence – his stare flickering with lust. His thumb smoothed over your mouth and you could feel your heart rumble within your chest, your body trembling with each outlet of air.

“but you continue to toy with me, you appear in my dreams where I find myself doing the most indecent things to you” the confession made you lean into his touch, the realization of how good his hand felt pressed against your cheek eliminating all hesitation “it makes me question what a gracious man like me can do.”

“Jin” you trembled, body running feverishly warm as you bore into his eyes.

His hand traveled to the back of your head, his fingers intertwining with strands of your hair and he pulled, firmly but yet not hard enough to cause pain – your mouth opened as a whine traveled through your throat but before it could escape; his lips landed on yours.

 his tongue twisting away the small complaint.

It felt like a dream, like it wasn't real and for a second you wanted to pinch yourself – you wanted your alarm to go off so that you could wake up because it felt too real and dreams like these often brought you utter disappointment. Jin ran his hands against your body, his cold touch leaving a tingling sensation in its wake.

You could feel your arousal dripping against your panties, the exhilaration of his mouth and hands on you leaving your mind hazed. Jin’s hand trailed under your tank top, his fingers gracing your stomach as they dragged themselves towards your breast, your small whimpers pouring into his ravenous mouth. His hand went under your bra where his fingers found your nipples, rubbing them lightly. your body leaning into his as a consequence. You both stood so close now and yet, it didn’t feel like enough.

You wanted to melt into him, wanted to feel him everywhere all at once – until you couldn't breath, until you were louder than the storm outside.

Small moans left your lips, urging him to lose all control and you could tell he was reaching his breaking point when his hips jerked forward, his erection pressing against your thigh. You leaned away from his lips, eyes meeting at the sudden action. You tugged at his drenched t-shirt and he allowed you to remove it, lifting his arms up in the air. Your eyes trailed his skin as you exposed it, inch by inch.

He was gorgeous, not a trace of imperfections on his soft pale skin – his shoulders were so broad and you pictured your legs stretched over them, giving him full access to the part that pulsed sorely in-between your thighs.

His hand reached for your hair once again, pulling your head back - his tongue traveling up the valley of your neck. your eyes fluttered shut, mouth releasing short sighs as he bit and nibbled on the tender skin. You felt like your skin was on fire, cheeks burning due to the lack of oxygen his mouth was causing. It was a  high you wanted to be in at all times.

 you had misread Jin entirely. This man was capable of destroying you, the evidence in the way your body trembled under his attention.

His hand slipped from under your shirt, finding the hem of your pajama pants and guiding his hand inside. Your mouth falling completely open once his slender fingers reach your clit, quivering in anticipation. He palmed you through your panties slowly, allowing your wetness to spread across the crutch of your panties.

“mhmm so warm” Jin groaned almost painfully.

He licked his lips as he stared into your eyes, darkness enveloping them the longer his hand remained inside of your pants, you knew you were completely fucked, he had you right where he wanted you.

 a thought arises from within the deepest part of your mind that perhaps, he was the one toying with you all this time. testing how far you would go to bring him to this point.

“Jin” you moaned “I want to uh.”

“What do you want to do?” he asked, arching his brow at your broken request.

You couldn’t concentrate but you were sure of what you wanted, of what you wanted to do to him. you reached forward, your hand finding his rock hard dick - giving it a slow pump. It quivered under your touch, urging you for more. Small groans fell out Jin’s mouth, the hand intertwined with your hair pulling back a bit harder.

Your eyes pleaded out to him -  slowly sinking on your knees. your stare never breaks with Jin. You wanted to look at him while you snatched his soul away, you had imagined this moment so many times and now that it was finally here, presented to you in a silver platter your mouth salivated. You slowly pushed down his sweats and then his boxers, his erection springing out, standing tall in front of you.

Your willing tongue unraveled from your mouth, holding his delicate length in your hand as you slid your tongue up his shaft, spreading your saliva against the pulsing vein there. Your deep breaths cascades over his tip, his cock twitching against your tongue in anticipation. Jin watched  through hooded eyes, unable to blink away from your position under him.

“Ah fuck” he groaned. 

You looked so pretty, so dirty – he could cum from the sight alone.

Your tongue glided towards his tip, your damp muscle collecting all the pre-cum that sat on his slit, the salty taste making your clit pulsate. Your tongue slipped back and forth and then you felt it, his whole body trembling at the pleasure you were drawing out with just your mouth and you let out a moan, one that you couldn’t withhold because god did he look ethereal from this angle.

You eased his head into your mouth, eyes wide open looking up at him – your cheeks hollowing as you began to slowly bob your head, allowing him to catch his breath whilst your tongue glided around his thickness. Hisses streamed out of him, the sensation of your warm mouth wrapped around him leading him to throw his head back in pleasure.

Your saliva allowed you to take in more of him – feeling his cock reach the back of your throat, tickling your tonsils. you began moving your head faster, your hand reaching to pump the length that your mouth couldn’t take, the other slipping inside of your pajamas, your fingers rubbing against your folds and dipping inside of your warm walls.

His hand reached down, gripping your hair again and you noticed it was something he liked to do but you didn’t mind – the small pang of discomfort causing moans to vibrate against his dick. Jin’s hips started to move into your willing mouth, drool dripping down your chin as you continued your quick tempo – the sound of his drenched cock dipping in and out of your mouth echoing inside of the dining area along with the sound of your gagging. 

Your eyes burned, tears brimming at the corners but you didn’t dare to look away as he looked down at you, he appeared so sexy whilst in heat, the thought that it was you doing this to him causing your fingers to move quicker inside of you, your arousal gliding down your hands. 

“Y/n” Jin moaned.

You removed your hand from his shaft and took in the rest of him, you could feel your throat begin to burn but you didn’t care – your need to have his entire length in your mouth overpowering even your need for air. Your head bobbed up and down, waiting for him to come undone in your mouth but his hand pulled back on your head, causing his cock to slide out of your mouth with a loud pop.

“That's not where I want to come,” he groaned, his chest rising and falling with each harsh breath he took. 

He glided his thumb against your pulsing red lips, collecting the drool that remained on your chin. You whimpered, your own thumb pressing against your clit - fucking yourself to the sight of him. He carried a dark ardor, a look in his eyes that you had never witnessed before or perhaps never noticed. 

In one swift movement you were off the floor, Jin placed you on the kitchen counter - his tongue once again sliding down the nape of your neck dragging out small moans from your mouth. He was experienced, his mouth and hands knowing where to touch and tug as if he had studied your entire anatomy and you let him, falling into the bliss of all your lust filled dreams. 

His mouth found yours, his lips blending against your own with rapid appetite. His hands traveled to your waist, moving his fingers in between the skin and the hem of your pants and with one pull - he brought down your pajamas and dampened panties. You yelped as the cold air hit your hot clit - begging for his touch. He pulled away from your kiss - bringing his pointer and index finger into his mouth and coating the digits with his saliva - his eyes fixed on yours. 

Your body shivered, as you watched him preparing himself to completely wreck you and not a word of objection leaves your mouth, entranced with how sexy he makes it all look. He’s a professional and you had been too cocky to ever realize that. He pressed his fingers against your throbbing pussy, your hips jerking forward at the sensation. His fingers are long and warm against your cunt and you want nothing more than to have them inside of you. 

“Shhh relax” Jin hummed, rubbing your clit in small slow circles. 

Your breath trembled, mouth falling open as he teased your needy cunt - a smirk forming on his lips. Your touch deprivation didn't go unnoticed to the man standing in front of you. Your back arching into his teasing contact. He leaned forward and left wet kisses on your chest, trails of love bites and saliva as  he reached your breast and then his fingers began to move faster - his mouth taking one of your nipples into his mouth with ease. 

“Jin” you whimpered. He was everywhere all at once and your body shook, he was too much and yet you were capable of taking it all. 

His tongue went flat against your hardened nub, gliding it up and down and then sucking on the nipple softly, your hands tangled themselves in his hair, your legs shaking as he slid one finger into your welcoming cunt and then another, and then another and soon he began pumping them quickly, holding no mercy. 

Your hips matched his tempo and your breast begin to bounce as fucked yourself into his hand. Jin pulled away from your breast - not wanting to miss how much of a slut you had become for him. Your eyes were completely shut - allowing the feeling to take over you completely and you were a wreck but you couldn’t control your hips as they rolled against his appendages. Jin groaned at the sight of you, of your Pretty cunt taking all 3 of his fingers. 

“Look at you, you love this don’t you” he muttered into your ears, his forehead pressed into your cheek as he looked down at his fingers disappearing into your cunt, glistening with your juices - leaving a small puddle on the counter. 

“Is this what you wanted?” he asked but you remained silent, whimpers replacing the answer you wanted to give. 

“Mhm?” Jin urged you, wanting to hear you beg for him. 

“Y-yes” you stuttered. 

“Look who's stuttering now” he mocked and your eyes open, gleaming with lust. 

Jin slowly retracted his fingers from where they had remained, embedded inside of you, the action making you whine in desperation which made Jin smile in response - you were needy, no longer in control and Jin felt his dick quiver at the realization. He looked deep into eyes as he stood in front of you. he raised his hand and spit into his palm proceeding to lather up your already dripping cunt. You could feel his saliva coat your clit, the feeling causing your whole body to tremble. 

He leaned back in for a kiss, slowly pressing you back into the counter until you could only see the ceiling above you. His hands slid up your thighs and with one swift movement he brought your ass to the end of the counter, your legs now placed exactly where you had wanted them to be for so long, where you thought they would look their best, thrown over his shoulders. 

“You look so good like this” he groaned, his eyes scanning your half naked body. 

You could hear the loud whistling of the tea kettle on the stove consume the entire room, creating a symphony with the moans that rattled from your lungs and then Jin sank into you, with so much ease, so smoothly that for the next few seconds you couldn't breath. 

Jin’s hands rubbed along your legs, his hips starting to roll into you with swift and disposed movements. You could feel all of him, the pulsations of his cock as he slowly retracted and then easily slipped back inside. The way the tip of his cock reached your ovaries, your legs quivering out of reflex. 

“Jin” you cried out and you lost it, eyes rolling to the back of your head as he snapped his waist, pounding into you with so much speed that the counter underneath you began to shake, Jin’s hand flied to your tank top, gripping it in his hand -  pulling at the fabric with each thrust that he gave you. 

“Is this what you wanted me to do all this time?” he questioned, bringing his thumb against your clit. 

“Y-yes” you yelped. 

“Fuck Y/n” he moaned breathlessly and the thunder outside was no match for the sound of your greedy wet cunt taking his entire length, your loud yelps and moans masking the natural disaster taking place. 

Your ass bounced against his thighs each time he slammed into you and he was frantic, your warm walls smothering his aching cock as he plunged into you with so much need and desire you could feel your clit swell around him. As you peered down at him there wasn’t a trace left of the shy boy you once knew. His eyes darkened, glazed over as he stared at his dick stretching out your walls. His teeth biting down onto his lip harshly in a foolish attempt to refrain from the grunts that vibrated from his chest. 

His fingers rubbed quickly over your flustered clit, it was as if he already knew what you needed before you said it, he had you down to a science and you couldn’t stop your body from convulsing, your cunt squeezing around him as a signal of your incoming orgasm. 

“Jin i’m gonna-” you yelp out, this orgasm was different from the ones you would give yourself to the thought of him, pressure beginning to form dangerously in your core. 

“Shhhh i know princess relax” he hummed like an expert only would. 

Your legs fell from his shoulders and his hands received them quickly, holding them wide open. The view of your pussy taking him to the hilt  urging him to flutter in pleasure but he didn’t want to look away - he didn’t want to miss a beat, not when it had been everything he’s dreamed of and more. 

You looked so perfect, felt so perfect and whilst he fought the utter pleasure surging through him, that left him completely spent he could feel your cunt constricting around his cock, his hips faltering at the sudden tightness that enveloped him. 

“Ahh ahh” Jin yelped. 

 With loud moans you came undone, your body tensing and muscle restricting - eyes brimming with tears and just as fast, you felt every cell inside of you ease, like a shot of anesthesia, body and mind going completely blank. Moments later Jin shoots streams of his warm nectar into your walls, filling up every ridge, his milk oozing out as he retracts his hips slowly, careful as to not disturb your high. 

By the time the morning crept into the city of Yeosu, the storm had subsided - superseded by the bright sun that now shined directly in your face. You concluded that the sky had made it its goal to not allow you peaceful slumber these past few days. Denying you the pleasures of rest. You had been awake for a few minutes now but you had been reluctant to open your eyes, focusing on the feeling of the soft comforter wrapped around your nude body. 

Perhaps you were just really tired but the truth was that you just didn’t want to recognize the body that laid next to you, soft snores flowing past their lips, their face nestled into the crook of your neck. 

If you opened your eyes then it would all come to an end, the feeling of his arm wrapped around your waist, the feeling of his weight besides you. Yet, you knew it couldn't last forever and although neither of you had shared any words regarding the events that took place last evening, or the other things that happened after that, you concluded it would all end the same way it usually did. 

You weren’t unfamiliar to awkward goodbyes when the sexual tension dissipated and though inside you wanted to hold onto the hope that maybe this time it would be different, that Jin wasn't like that - you were aware of the inevitable. 

Your eyes blinked open with a soft hiss and for a moment you were blinded by a ray of sunshine gleaming on your face - you raised one of your arms, blocking away the light and carefully turned to glance over at the sleeping man beside you. Jin was sound asleep and you could tell how completely at ease he was in contrast to your nerves that rattled you out of your very needed and desired slumber. 

You didn’t want to leave, didn’t want him to wake up to an empty bed but you knew it would only be harder if you were to leave whilst he was awake, you knew he would attempt to sooth the rejection that was approaching. 

You carefully lifted his arm from around your waist, sliding inch by inch out of the comforter you both shared. Your eyes remained on his resting form, his lips slightly parted and his disheveled silky black locks sprawled on the pillow underneath his head - he looked angelic and your heart lurched at the sight. 

You contemplated if you should’ve stayed, if you could allow yourself a bit of cruelty in exchange for comfort but you had been down that road many times before and at last you made up your mind. Your eyes moved to scan the floor, trying to find the article of clothing you wore the day before but they are nowhere to be found. 

“Shit” you whispered. 

Scenes of the previous day flashed through your mind like a silent film, replaying the lust filled moments you both shared - your bodies intertwining in nearly every room of the vacant home until you found shelter under his bed sheets. His moans and whimpers forever embedded into your memory causing your legs to quiver as you stood disoriented in his room. 

You had left your clothing sprawled in different corners of the house - evidence left for your colleagues to find upon their arrival. 

Jin’s body twists and turns and grumbles fall from his lips, shifting you into overdrive. your hands quickly picked up one of his t-shirts that had been thrown across the floor. You slipped the fabric over your head - being suddenly hit with his scent, guilty adrenaline soaring through you. 

You slowly moved towards the door, your steps careful and calculated as you attempted to escape the room like a foolish thief. Your hands reached for the doorknob, wincing as the door creaked under your touch, cursing at the old house for exposing you in such a dire situation. 

“I thought i had at least 5 more minutes” Jin’s raspy voice echoed inside of the silence you so badly tried to keep. 

Your body froze - heart thumping inside of your chest at a faster rate than before. You shut your eyes as a grimace took over your expression - you had been caught, red handed. You tried to come up with an excuse, in order to lessen the blow but nothing came to mind and as you turned you gave him the words you had heard oh so many times before. 

“Sorry, i didn't want to wake you” the words left a pungent aftertaste in your mouth as you spoke them. 

Jin was sitting amongst the mess of comforter and sheets you both had made, his bare chest gleaming with the light that ripped through the windows - his hand reaching to rub his puffy eyes, a long exhausted sigh leaving his lips. 

“It's too early for you to lie and honestly, I'm too tired to believe it.”

You blinked quickly, his statement throwing you off balance. His tone did not hold any anger or frustration - he sounded disappointed. He was a reflection of you this time and now you were the one having to seek for poor excuses regarding your sudden departure. 

“Jin I-” you tried to speak but your words were cut off by silence, a boulder sitting comfortably against your throat. 

Jin shifted from his sitting position - his eyes focused on your messy hair and on his favorite t-shirt that hung loosely around your frame. 

“You are always close but yet, so out of reach Y/n” Jin states “as open as you appear to be you hold your doors so tightly that your hands grow blisters.” he didn’t intend to be harsh - in fact his words are only a demonstration of how deeply he had come to know you but you couldn’t control the bitter sensation they left inside of you. 

“I didn't mean to- '' you began but couldn’t finish, swallowing down your justifications. 

“I can predict the weather for the next 2 weeks but not what you will do next” he chuckled and your lips quivered at the reality of what he was saying, of the truths that he knew and threw at you without hesitation. 

“I just don't want to mess things up - not this time around Jin, not with you” your mouth grew dry, your eyes glistening with tears that you didn’t want to let out. 

“That’s not a decision you can make on your own,” Jin retorted. 

“Jin, i've been here before so many times - i don't want it to be you running out of my life this time, the thought alone is unbearable and i know we don't know each other like that but i don't want to put you in an uncomfortable situation, you are a really nice guy” you don’t breath between your words, your lungs constricting as you give him your reasons in fear that he won't understand. 

“Well I'm not the one sneaking out of the room, am i?” 

Jin’s stare was sharp and you fidgeted under it - your mind attempting to find other logical reasons why whatever it is you both shared ultimately would come crashing down in the most vile kind of way. 

“What if you grow tired of me?” you whispered, eyes looking away from his. 

“I like coffee” he jokes and this time you smile. 

“I'm being serious!” you whine, your brows knitting with the conflicting debate that expands in your head. 

“Y/n, i am a grown man” Jin smirks “and not the kind that plays silly little games.”

Your eyes snap in his direction - a pang of guilt shooting through you. 

“Yeah i’m sorry about that too” you mutter, your cheeks growing flushed in embarrassment. 

“Are you?” Jin raises his eyebrow, a small smile appearing on his cheeks.

“Stop apologizing and come here.”

It doesn't take a second longer before you swiftly remove his t-shirt from your body - making a mental note to remind him that it belongs to you now. the insignificant object becoming one of the first things he will let you keep without hesitation because this man, the one who you decorate with kisses - the one that has entered your atmosphere at high speeds and at an unknown trajectory will never be like the others.

© 𝐂𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞, 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝.

[ripplestitchskein]

I think it’s important to note that the episode went out of its way, mentioning it at least twice, to establish that Stolas gave Blitzø a choice to come over or not for several months BEFORE the final confrontation and Blitzø chose not to. So while I agree that Blitzo deserved time to process he had already shown Stolas multiple times that if given an option he would not choose Stolas, so I do not agree that Stolas took Blitzo’s one misunderstanding, thinking it was a role play (or deluding himself it was) as the rejection alone, it was that on top of already soft balling the choice to Blitz for several months before that. All Blitz did was confirm it in person.

And honestly, given what we have in texts and what Stolas straight up says to him after Ozzie’s, I don’t even agree that Stolas blindsided him, or that Stolas portrayed their relationship as being only about sex up until this point. Yes, he absolutely oversold the sexual aspect based on Blitzø’s approach, he was over the top initially but he honestly toned that down by Ozzie’s and from that point onward it is all Blitzo’s refusal to look at it or listen to what he actually says. I’d argue he started that as early as Harvest Moon when he offers the trip to him. Blitz does the same thing during the entire conversation, straight up ignoring what Stolas is saying in favor of his own fears and insecurities and as a result he makes Stolas’s fears come true.

It’s just a really well done dynamic. Like the outwardly tough and brave character giving into their fears and being unable to get past them which inadvertently results in them confirming the fears of the softer, more outwardly timid character who didn’t give in to theirs and tried anyway? Brilliant.

Like Blitz is a perfect use case for this

[c0ld0utside]

Platonic Yandere Werewolf Dad or Platonic Yandere Vampire Dad!?!

Assuming you’re asking for more of Werewolf Dad or Massimo. We’re going with Werewolf Dad and I’ve decided that his name is Lucian. 

Warnings: Mentions of disease and insects, Home intruders, Kidnapping, Violence/Gore, Panic attacks (Reader)

It’s been five months since your Dad’s little…transformation, and the two of you have made some discoveries. For one, each moon cycle has a certain “pull” on your Dad. On New Moon phases your Dad can’t shift at all (something he’s been working on controlling) and on Full Moons he has to.   The two of you had yet to see what effects Harvest, Blue, Blood, and Eclipse moons had on him, and the ideas you made weren’t pleasant. Crescent moons had the weakest “pull.” His urgest weren’t that strong on those days either. Quarters weren’t that bad either. Waning moons is where it got tricky.

Like today, for example. 

You had been helping your Dad in the kitchen, seasoning the steaks when he started to shift again, groaning and gripping the kitchen island tightly. “Dad-?” You started. “I-it’s alright, pup…it’s just really loud today.” He reassured, taking deep, shallow breaths. “Can you reign it in?” You asked, setting the seasoning down. This could go two ways. Either he bolts out the door, or he snatches you up, drags you into your room, and makes you stay in there while he goes out to hunt. Literally. The amount of deer corpses you’ve had to clean up was getting ridiculous. 

“Trying,” your Dad huffs. He lets out another groan. “You might h-have to go t-to your room.” With an irritated sigh, you head into your room and flop down on your bed. You try not to cringe as you hear your Dad give in, groaning and whining as the transformation takes hold. A few moments later, you hear claws scraping against the wooden floor of your home and a low, growling noise. You can hear your dad shuffling around and struggling to get up, yipping quietly as if he was trying to call out to you. “I’m in here,” you say aloud, leaving your bed and opening your door. 

Immediately your father stands to full height and looks over at you. He’s taller in his wolf form, lean and utterly terrifying. Wood-brown fur and red-brown eyes stare at you from down the hall, mouth slightly open and teeth on display. With another growl, he charges at you-

-and then wraps one arm around your back and the other under your thighs, scooping you up and carrying you into your room. He sets you down on the bed and grumbles at you as if he were complaining. A type of grumble you’ve come to learn is: Stay put, I’m going hunting. “No- no, you don’t need to do that,” You say urgently, rolling out of your bed. Your father growls at you but you ignore him. Instead, you head back into the kitchen, the weredad chasing after you and snarling. There’s no real heat behind it. You know that now after the first few weeks of him doing that. “Look, we were making dinner!” 

His angry gaze shifts from you to the half-seasoned steaks on the kitchen island, which were sitting on a large cutting board. He lets out a dissatisfied growl. Not good enough. “No, it’s fine,” You say firmly.  He growls again. There’s heat behind that one. “Oh come on! Dad, I can’t eat the deer you drag into the house! They probably have that wasting disease or ticks! Remember what happened last time? It got infested with maggots!” Another growl. “Dad. Please.” Deadpanning, your Dad picks you up again, carries you into your room, and tucks you into your bed. He points at you with a firm expression before leaving and shutting the door behind him. “Are you serious-” You start, earning a muffled warning bark in return. That makes you go quiet. 

With no other options, you lie in bed and wait, watching the digital clock on your bedside table. Boredom sets in quickly. In werewolf mode your Dad will definitely throw a fit at any signs of you leaving the bed, but you’d take an angry werewolf over dying of boredom any day. So you read a short book. Two. Then you scroll on your phone. You check your clock. Two hours have passed. You hear the door open.

Your heart drops at the sound of multiple footsteps. Heavy boots against the wooden floor. The shifting of fabric and objects. The click of a gun.

Quickly- and with not many options- you hide under your bed. Someone enters your room, walking around before heading over to your closet and slamming it open. They dig through it, tossing your clothes and other things you stored inside onto your rugged floor. There’s a pause. A beat. Two. Then the stranger is making their way over to your bed, ripping the covers off. You finally realize that you stopped breathing when they kneel down to look under the bed, dark eyes looking into your frightened ones. 

-

Lucian’s mind is running at a mile a minute. Hungry Pup is hungry I’m hungry Need food Food at home isn’t enough Need more Need more Pup deserves more Is pup safe Pup should be safe… 

His paws? Hands? Pound against the forest floor, sending leaves and fallen twigs everywhere and bugs scurrying. Above an owl hoots. Farther ahead a mouse squeals. Scents fill his nose. Avian, rodent, pine, earth, water, flowers, leaves, deer…

Deer. Perfect for his pup. Enough to share. Enough to fill them up and make his Pup big and strong. Maybe he’ll find some berries? Preferably blueberries. They can’t always rely on deer and rabbits. Lucian pauses, taking a moment to lock on to the scent. A doe. A fawn. Oh, man…his heart aches a bit at the thought. But pup needs food, his mind says. And food his pup shall have. Lucian takes off into a sprint, pace speeding up when he finds tracks.

He’s close to his target when a  nagging feeling tugs at Lucian and his thoughts get worse. Something’s wrong Is pup safe Pup should be safe So why do I feel this way Go back Need to check on pup Pup needs help… A scream rips through the air, coming from the direction of his home. Pup.

Abandoning his mission, Lucian whirls around and bounds back home, breath coming out in huffs of air. Strange scents fill his nose. Unfamiliar ones. Tobacco. Metal. Gunpowder. Leather. Oil. Older humans and his pup. He bursts into his home and finds it a mess. Everything he sees screams signs of a struggle- chairs knocked over, broken glasses, dirty footprints on the wooden floor. Whimpering, Lucian rushes into his pup’s room.

They’re gone, covers thrown off the bed and clothes littering the floor. Where where where where where why why why why why who would do this who would dare- his mind rambles, panic turning into rage. Whoever took his pup would regret the day they were born. He’d make sure of it. 

The scent trail is easy to follow. Foolish, his mind growls. Foolish Stupid Going to get them Going to kill them Going to make them pay Where is my pup I want my pup back Stupid Stupid Stupid… The thoughts swirl around in his head like a hurricane. It hurts and it’s overwhelming and worsens his already-soured mood. That’s an understatement. His mood is the most bitter, sour, foul tasting thing anyone could ever taste if it were possible. It would be pure poison. Maybe even acid. Melting through flesh and bone and mixing with blood. Each step has a purpose, stamping out the footprints the humans left. Metal…gunpowder…hunters? That’s interesting. 

Lucian had tried to find the werewolf who made him what he is now, but all of the scents had gone stale and he came up with nothing. It had been frustrating and still was. It would’ve been nice to know that yes, werewolf hunters do exist. …Though he should’ve known that himself. If there were werewolves running around then that meant the hunters were just as real and still in business. The scent is getting stronger now and the trees are thinning out. He smells metal. Silver, probably? Was he now weak to silver? He had sold his ring after his wife left and he couldn't be bothered to test it with his wood tools. 

He hears voices. His pup’s voice and others he’s never heard before. Gruff. Hostile. Cruel. He’s mindful about where he steps as he sneaks up on the fools. 

-

“Is this really necessary?” One of your kidnappers grumble. Two men are fussing over your bindings, tying you up against a tree. “I don’t see why we had to use the kid as bait. It would’ve been better to catch the damn thing by surprise.” The other nudges him harshly. “I believe in the new boss. Sure, he’s…rough and isn’t as good as his old man, but he’ll learn. He has us to help him out for a reso-” He rambles, only to get cut off by jaws snapping around his head, crushing his skull. Blood sprays into the air and splatters onto the floor. Both you and the remaining man scream in pure terror as you watch your father pull the poor guy’s head off of his body. He lets it drop from his mouth and turns to the other, who cowers away. 

“No- wait- I didn’t even want to!” He pleads, falling on his ass to the floor. A deep growl comes from your dad- one you have never heard before. You can’t hear the clicking of a gun over the commotion, but the werewolf in front of you does. Your father abruptly ducks to the ground and a bullet whizzes over his head. Then he lunges, leaping into the air and slamming into the hunter who shot at him. The guy who fell messily gets back up and runs in the direction of your house, ignoring his coworker’s screams for help. You force yourself not to look. You try not to look. 

Your brain overpowers your body and you take a peek. Nausea churns in your stomach at the sight; your father- the werewolf- ripping into the man’s stomach and feeding on his entrails while he wailed and begged for mercy. Holding him in place with his claws. Nails digging into his weeping flesh. You feel hot and your face feels wet, an ache blooming in your head. Your chest grows tight and for some reason it’s getting harder and harder to breathe. Maybe it’s the ropes. It’s definitely the ropes, right? Yeah…the ropes. The wailing dies down into quiet sobs, which dissolves into silence. Licking its maw, the werewolf rises and looks over at you. 

“Please,” you choke out, heart pounding a mile a minute. “Please don’t- Dad, please.” The beast stared at you for a moment before walking over, placing a hand on your shoulder and keeping it there as he walked behind you like you were a horse. He fumbled with the knot in the ropes, the bindings getting loose and eventually going slack. They fell around you and into your lap, the werewolf tugging them off of you. He moved back in front of you and sat down. He licked the blood and gore from his lips before lowering himself, slowly reaching for your hand and grabbing hold of it. 

You flinch, wanting to pull away, and the werewolf whimpers. He presses your hand against his forehead, grip light and thumb rubbing your wrist soothingly. It takes you a moment to understand what he wants. Cautiously, your hand moves down to rub the back of his neck, the feeling of his fur grounding you. Your Dad shuffles closer, sitting up to pull you into an embrace. His hands press against your back, pushing you into him and forcing you to take deep breaths. The smell of iron fills your nose and blood gets on your clothes. It’s still warm and it makes your panic worse, which in turn makes your Dad hold you closer. 

He scoops you up, holding you tightly against his chest. Your Dad breathes in deeply and exhales slowly, making you unconsciously follow along with it. In and out, in and out, like wind through the leaves.. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6…1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. The two of you do this for a while, your Dad rocking back and forth slightly. After you calm down, your dad lifts his head up and sniffs the air. A low growl rumbles through him and he sets you down behind him. As he goes on ahead, you realize you’re shaking, panic still not completely soothed. Okay…okay, you’ll just have to do it yourself. Picking up where the two of you had let off, you breathe in and out, listening to the forest around you and squeezing your arms when you breathe in. 

You catch a glimpse of the corpses. Reds, whites, yellows, pinks. You nearly throw up from the sight and have to start all over again. 

-

Something clicks in Luican’s head as he tracks down the runaway. The leader wasn’t with them when he was attacked. Did they run off? Most likely. And that would explain why he sees two pairs of footprints instead of one. He reaches his backyard and walks up the wooden steps to the back patio at the top of the small hill. He remembers building this; his pup watching with curious eyes and offering to help. Lucian’s heart warms at the memories. The faint sound of crying catches his attention. 

For a moment fear starts to pool in his belly- until he realizes that the voice sounds different than his pup’s. Grunting, Lucian makes his way around the side of the house, through the thrown open fence gate. He walks down the beaten path that leads from his home to the street and finds the runaway sobbing on the asphalt. The sight of tire tracks tells the whole story. Their leader fled. …Which is far from good. Grabbing the runaway by his shoulder and yanking him back, Lucian clams his jaws around the man’s head and twists, the hunter’s neck twisting too far and letting out a sickening crack. 

That was the easy part. Now to track down the coward who left his men to die and make sure he doesn’t come back. Lucian takes off down the road, following the smell of burning rubber and gas. 

-

Every step you take back home fills you with dread. You hope this is the way back home; eyes glued to the floor and following the wolf-like paw prints in the earth, mixing with bootprints. You’ve never been afraid like this. …Then again, you never went out walking late at night or went too far from the house. Up ahead, you see the lights from your back patio. Instead of relief you are filled with apprehension. The wooden steps creak under your weight and the grass bends beneath your feet. It’s like your brain has switched to autopilot. Your head is just piloting your body around, carrying you into the bathroom. 

You need to rinse the filth off of you. Instead you burst into tears and sink to the floor. Why did this have to happen? Why was it you and your father that had to be stuck in this situation?  You wish you could go back in time and beg him not to go to work that day. Then you wouldn’t have seen him as a monster when he saved you. Then he wouldn’t have killed those men. But they deserved it, your mind says. You wish you didn’t agree. You cry until you can’t cry anymore. You cry until you’re too exhausted to move. You cry until the exhaustion settles in and brings you under, forcing you to sleep.

When you wake up you’re not in your room. You hear the bath running and your father steps out. “Bubba? Are you up?” He asks softly, walking over to your side of the bed and patting your shoulder. “...Yeah, you’re up. I can tell. Come on, pup, I got the bath ready for you. You can use my bathroom this time. I know you prefer it.” It’s true. You did prefer your dad’s bathroom because it had an actual bath tub. “I set out a change of clothes for you. Just remember to wash your hair in the shower afterwards, okay? Don’t worry about last night...”

“...I’ll take care of it.”

---

WHOOOO I DID IT!!! WE DID IT!!!!

Man I really need to make headers. Again some of my asks had disappeared so sorry about that. I'll update the masterlist at some point. Reminder that you're all beautiful and remember to drink water. I've been thinking of doing COD characters...how do we feel about that?

[ranchstoryblog]

Ranch Story Community Q&A Volume 3: Igusa Matsuyama Returns!

Igusa Matsuyama, the legendary artist behind the Story of Seasons series since the original 1996 game has once again agreed to a Q&A featuring questions from fans from around the world! A big thank you to all the members of the community who helped make this possible.

Some aspects of the text have been altered to match localization people are familiar with. (Japanese names to English names, for example: Bokujou Monogatari (牧場物語) was formerly localized as Harvest Moon and is now localized as Story of Seasons, etc). Images were not part of the original text and have been added as a visual aid. Though we translated as many questions as we could, we did not include questions involving personal information or regarding unannounced releases. Please understand.

If you would like to read our original correspondence (in Japanese), that will be provided in a separate post.

Additional cosplay photo provided by Foxface from our community Discord.

Translations: @artycharmy (correspondence, outline) Editing and Clean-up: Jerome, @artycharmy, and @regularcelery

——— Anonymous asks: What is the relationship between Jamie and the Harvest Goddess?

Igusa Matsuyama: Jamie was treated as a fairy or spirit. I'm sorry, but I'm not sure if there's any points that link them and the Goddess.

Editor's note: the term Matsuyama uses is "妖精."

Tomato asks: I would like to ask about what their inspiration was for the outfits designs in the original release of harvest moon another wonderful life. Since I got reminded of the girl clothing brand Mezzo Piano when looking at the I love Kuma/I love bears outfit.

Igusa Matsuyama: I remember the only thing I thought of was using Spring-like colours! (All designs were made with seasonal colours In mind) When I knew that Daachan, who was planned to be used in a lot of events, wouldn't actually play a big role in the game, I put him on the T-Shirt so he could at least get some attention as a mascot-like existence.

Pansy asks: If you were able to create your own game for the Story of Seasons franchise, with no rules or limitations whatsoever, what do you think it might look like?

Igusa Mastuyama: Since I love dogs, I'd like to try making a Story of Seasons that's set in a world just full of dogs. Though that dream of mine probably won't come true.

Anonymous asks: The look of Story of Seasons has changed a lot over the years! What would you say is more challenging to create - simple designs, where you have to work with very little space, or complicated designs, where you have to consider many little details?

Igusa Matsuyama: A long time ago there were a lot of things you weren't able to replicate in video games. There were constraints for things like the number of colours and patterns for hair styles and clothes. It was difficult to work around those constraints, but at the same time a lot of fun. Nowadays, it's the complete opposite. Now we can design anything with hardly any constraints. And unlike a long time ago, now I'm asked to make more complicated designs, like patterns and decorations. However, if it's a big request, sometimes I run into quite a lot of trouble when designing. They each have had their own difficulties.

Anonymous asks: Hello, Matsuyama! Thank you for bringing the worlds of Bokujou Monogatari to life for many years. Your art has had a huge influence on me!

One of my favorite candidates is “Rock” from “A Wonderful Life.” I’d love to know any particular influences for his character design from 21 years ago, and his new design for the remake.

Igusa Matsuyama: I was told that he was a young, wannabe playboy, so I somehow ended up with that sort of design. For the remake, I made his clothes a little looser without changing his design, so he'd look even more playful. I, too, wanted to avoid changing him as much as I could as there are other people among the staff that also like the original for his “Rockness”. So, he got that makeover after everybody shared and checked their opinions with each other.

Jerome asks: On page 130 of the "Special Comic" manga there's artwork of Super Famicom characters that have never been printed anywhere else. Do you or Marvelous still have these? It would be great to see them in more detail in the future some time.

Igusa Matsuyama: They're all characters that appeared in the SNES version of "Harvest Moon." Nina's parents, Ellen's mother, Ann's father, Maria's parents (The mayor couple). I'm sorry. My SNES illustrations have gone missing...

Raven Bloom, Ryan, and Moth ask: How did you feel when your designs for the men in A Wonderful Life were repurposed to be bachelors? What do you think of the changes made to the bachelors in the remake of A Wonderful Life? I miss the “Bruce Campbell” look Matthew used to have.

Igusa Matsuyama: Matthew (マシュー) is Masshu (マッシュ) in the Japanese A Wonderful Life (Editors note: Charmy made a careless mistake when translating the questions, sorry Matsuyama san 🫣) When I first heard this name, the first thing that came to mind was Evil Dead's protagonist, Ash. You're right. I designed him after Bruce Campbell. I still love Bruce Campbell today. When Wonderful Life was under production, I had heard they weren't going to make a girl version, so I designed him not as a love interest, but as a quirky character. Knowing that he'd appear in the remake as a marriage candidate, I redesigned him as a character that would be liked by many. I hope you can enjoy the game for its nostalgia, as well as for being a shiny, brand new release.

Salmon Axe and Anonymous ask: I personally adore Doraemon x SOS game. Are you interested in working directly with or collaborating with other franchises in the future? And is there a series outside Story of Seasons you would like to work with now as a guest artist? (Could it be Pokemon?)

Igusa Matsuyama: I've loved Doraemon manga since I was a kid! Working as a guest artist? Hmm, I'm happier being the main illustrator, so nothing in particular comes to mind. I enjoy a lot of games in my free time, such as Fallout, Far Cry and Border Lands.

Anonymous asks: Even though we never see his face, was there ever a concept of how Woofio would look without his costume?

Igusa Matsuyama: I designed Woofio as the being that is Woofio, so there's no design of him without his costume.

Idris asks: Your style has upgraded a lot over the time to match the trends. Do you think you will ever go for an old school look (early HM) for a SoS game again? What do you think is the secret to your art’s charm?

Igusa Matsuyama: What I'm particular about when designing for Story of Seasons is making characters with head/body proportions and an atmosphere that go well with that release. First, I listen to the client's request then think of a design according to that. These days, game visuals have gotten fancier and fancier, so there's not many opportunities for characters with short proportions to make an appearance. To me, what's important when designing is "playfulness." More so than "pretty" or "cool" and such, I get attached to the character, have fun making the character. I find joy in character creation itself.

MacGyver asks: Yasuhiro Wada has shared some interesting stories about how chaotic the original game's development was. Is there anything interesting you remember from around that time? 

Igusa Matsuyama: Now it's a memory I can look back on and laugh about, but I'm not sure how much I can talk about it so please forgive me. If Wada hadn't been there back then, then "Harvest Moon" wouldn't have become a thing.

Toyberb and Anonymous ask: There’s a lot of different cow designs now, which is your favorite to draw?

Igusa Matsuyama: I've loved drawing animals since I was a kid, so I love all of the cows. Although the easiest one to draw is the cow with the big nose.

Anonymous asks: Were there any games where you made designs for protagonists of genders that did not end up available to play as? (Like a girl protagonist for Save the Homeland/Hero of Leaf Valley or a nonbinary protagonist for any game before A Wonderful Life)

Igusa Matsuyama: There's so many designs that got scrapped, but as far as I recall, there's not really many where that character's setting itself was scrapped. (Excluding Thumbelina, mentioned below)

Koharu asks: Were there ever any character designs made for other older SNES characters like Ellen for 64? Some magazines had Marie with blue hair, like the SNES character, so it made me wonder if she (SNES Maria) was meant to also be there at some point.

Igusa Matsuyama: I'm not in the position to make settings or scenarios where characters from other games appear, so I can't say, but I like the idea of older characters making an appearance!

Amina/k0iisu asks: Hello! I really love Hiro’s design specifically. Could you tell me a few facts about him/his design that might not be well known information? Thank you so much! I love your art :D

Igusa Matsuyama: Thank you very much! Hiro is a future doctor, so I tried to make them look as much like a doctor as I could. Also, to make him look friendlier, I designed him as your average everyday boy you'd see in the neighbourhood. He doesn't have a flashy face or hairstyle, but he's one of my favourite designs, too. I wrote this in the guidebook too, but what I like about him is the Asian flair I added to his clothes and the spot of colour around his feet.

Bunbun asks: I'm excited for the Nendoroid that was announced of Claire! I hope there will be ones of HM64 designs too. Since you have a lot of figures on your blog, how does it feel to be able to add one of your own characters to your collection? Are there any of your other characters you hope will get figures of?

Igusa Matsuyama: A nendoroid of Claire! I'm looking forward to it too, but when is it going to be released? If it's possible, I'd like one of Woofio.

Editor's note: Preorders are open for Nendoroid Claire now!

Chickee asks: A purple-haired princess character was rumored to have existed in Harvest Moon 64, but she didn't make it to the published game. Did you create a design for this character?

Igusa Matsuyama: That's probably Princess Thumbelina. Wasn't she Incredibly small? What I designed didn't end up being used. Speaking of HM64 characters, I pushed for them to include a pet turtle, but in the end it only appeared as an ornament. For A Wonderful Life, I asked for a turtle to be included again and designed a tortoise with a scarf, but it didn't make it as a pet and appeared only as a wild turtle that walks around the pond. I'm waiting for the day they finally include a pet turtle in the game.

emery flower147 asks: omg  I saw the pics where the AWL girls are in a team and Muffy has a shotgun and stuff? Do you think any other characters would work in a cool team like that?

Igusa Matsuyama: For the Friends of Mineral Town guide book, I had the five girls, Popuri, Marie, Ran, Elly and Karen work hard as Harvest Sprites. Also, for the guide books, I drew Pete (The old male protagonist), Sarah (The GB version female protagonist), and Claire doing whatever I wanted them to. I don't know if you can call it cool or not, but it was fun being in charge of that.

Ixur asks: A lot of the PoOT character designs for the regular villagers seem more popular than the marriage candidates in my region. Is that something that's been noticed by you/Marvelous in Japan? Lars, Clemens, Beth, and Misaki for example.

Igusa Matsuyama: Marvelous doesn't really talk about that sort of thing so I'm not sure if they're aware of it or not. I don't do social media so I'm also not sure which characters are popular. I'm happy as long as the characters are liked. The design on Lars’s shirt is modeled after my beloved dog, so I’d be especially happy if you like his shirt too.

Anonymous asks: What do you think about people cosplaying your designs?

Igusa Matsuyama: It makes me very happy! I'm no good at sewing, so I really admire people who can make their own clothes. It's an honour having the designs I made be made into real clothes, and I think it's great to have fun acting out the characters.

Afro Fae asks: When creating designs for characters, how do you settle on a specific color palette? Do you take color meanings into account with a character's personality or do you go purely off of feeling?

Igusa Matsuyama: I keep in mind the overall colours the client asked for while designing. Sometimes I propose a new colour when I think there's one that fits better. I'm also careful when choosing colours and everyone's traits to make sure it's easy to tell which character is which when seen from a distance. However, in the cases of families and such, I do the opposite and give them all a common colour to give them a sense of kinship.

———

From all of us at Ranch Story, we'd like to thank Matsuyama from the bottom of our hearts for answering our questions again! Whether a fan has only just discovered the series or has grown up alongside it, so many people have loved these characters and worlds that Igusa Matsuyama brings to life, so it feels truly special to be able to have this opportunity. We'll end this article with Matsuyama's own words, as well as a parting gift.

Igusa Matsuyama: I'm so glad I could answer your questions again. I'm the one that should be saying thank you. It means the world to me knowing that everyone enjoys my illustrations! I added an illustration as thanks. I'll keep up the hard work!

[sissytobitch10seconds]

I want to talk a bit about the deal that Stolas and Blitz make in Helluva Boss.

Blitz should not have stolen the grimoire from Stolas because stealing is wrong. Stolas does need the grimoire to do his job, but we're never actually shown what that job is.

Stolas threatening to take the grimoire away from Blitz holds a lot more weight because we know what Blitz has to lose from that. If Blitz can't keep his business going then Millie, Moxxie, Loona, and himself are all out of a job, their homes, and living on the streets. We know that imps and hellhounds are on the bottom of the totem pole for Hell so it's easy to assume that living on the streets for them would be incredibly dangerous. Being homeless isn't a joke and it's likely going to be very hard for them to get other jobs seeing as they all came from Wrath and other demons are bigoted against them (like in Western Energy).

What does Stolas lose from not having the grimoire? He's been allowing Blitz to have it for many months/up to a year. We don't see anything that he's supposed to be doing other than the Harvest Moon Festival which is a single day out of the year. He takes the book back on the full moon but we never see what he does with it, so does he even really need it in the first place? What does he do that would get him in trouble or not doing it and what would happen to him if he was caught not fulfilling his duties? There's no weight to Stolas not having the grimoire because we don't know what's at stake. It makes it seem like he doesn't actually need it as an immortal demon that can simply wait until Blitz is ugly-old or dies before he picks up whatever it is that he's supposed to be doing.

We also know from the Pilot and Murder Family that Stolas waited quite a while before he decided to call Blitz up and strike the deal. We're shown that they've already had time to fill a commercial with a jingle, air it on TV, and have a graph with prophets. It doesn't make sense for Stolas to do this if he desperately needed the grimoire for his job. This implies that he waited for Blitz to feel secure in his job with his company and lose all the other options he might have had before he struck up the deal.

Then there comes the actual deal itself. He calls Blitz and refuses to listen to him when Blitz tells him that it's not a good time, ignoring the fact that he can see Blitz through the bubbles in the bath and hear the gunshots and screaming from the woman. He picks this specific moment to make Blitz agree to the deal because he knows that Blitz will have his guard down and not think about it fully.

The deal itself also removes Blitz's consent. He has to do whatever Stolas wants on the full moon and doesn't have the ability to say no. If Stolas wants to do bondage, then they do bondage even if Blitz doesn't want to. If Stolas wants to dirty talk about how sexy imps are (despite this being massively classist and racist) then he gets to. If Stolas wants to put out his cigarettes on Blitz's horns then he gets to, despite how obviously uncomfortable it makes him.

The deal also empowers Stolas to make unwanted and uncomfortable remarks. Blitz explicitly tells him to stop making sexual remarks and hitting on him in Loo Loo Land, and his response is to tell Blitz that he's cute when he's serious and touch him despite revoked consent. He does this several times throughout the show, which further proves the point that Blitz doesn't get to have consent.

People will also argue that Blitz started this by sleeping with Stolas on that first night. However, we can see in that scene in the Circus that Stolas is the one that said Blitz was there to ravage him and Blitz was only trying to play off of it so that he could escape and get to safety. He decided to have sex with Stolas because he doesn't have good impulse control, that's evident when Verosika tells us what he did when they broke up and him breaking into the palace in the first place.

The implication that because Blitz said yes to sex when he broke in means that he wants to be forced to have sex every month with someone he doesn't like is gross. It means that if you say yes to something, one time, then you are saying yes to that thing over and over again. It also implies that if you say yes to sex with a partner then you have to agree to everything that they want you to do.

I've also seen the argument that Blitz asked to have the month off a couple of times, but this isn't true. During the brief moment where Stolas felt guilty for keeping Blitz in this deal, he offered to skip the month and Blitz immediately took it. This is a big fucking sign that Blitz didn't want to be doing this in the first place and more evidence that Stolas doesn't actually need the book every month.

Stolas set up the deal for his own gain and that was it. This is why he throws such a huge fit when Blitz doesn't swoon over him and immediately confess his own love once he hands over the crystal. He thinks that he can be benevolent by allowing this imp to live the life that Blitz fought tooth and nail for and get whatever he wants. The crystal wasn't a way for Blitz to be free, it was another exchange for Stolas to get his way.

[punkpandapatrixk]

Full Harvest Moon in Pisces ♦︎ Moon Magick Pick A Card

The Full Harvest Moon, known also as the Singing Moon, was in Pisces on 18 September. It was a partial lunar eclipse and carried a massive Healer Archetype aenergy about it. After all, it was a supermoon in the sign of self-undoing and martyrdom :P It ushered in a deeply reflective time to ponder upon the suffering of Mankind in this all too often unfair world.

‘You’re not yourself when you’re triggered. You become who you think you need to be to survive. If we remain in environments that trigger our fight or flight mode, our identity starts to slip away because our values and personalities are constantly being hijacked by thoughts of fear, panic and survival.’ – some pin on Pinterest

It is unfortunate(?) but it is a significant part of Reality that each and every individual existing within this Matrix is suffering in their own wildly unique ways. Perhaps this is why the Buddha’s whole ass brand revolved around suffering—not to glamourise its concept but to maintain a semblance of awareness of its existence; and how that very thing alone shapes each person’s perception of Reality. Such an awareness...usually, breeds empathy. And that is precisely what this Full Singing Moon in Pisces theme is all about~🥰

‘When I was a novice, I could not understand why, if the world is filled with suffering, the Buddha has such a beautiful smile. Why isn’t he disturbed by all the suffering? Later I discovered that the Buddha has enough understanding, calm, and strength; that is why the suffering does not overwhelm him. He is able to smile to suffering because he knows how to take care of it and to help transform it. We need to be aware of the suffering, but retain our clarity, calmness, and strength so we can help transform the situation. The ocean of tears cannot drown us if karuna (compassion) is there. That is why the Buddha’s smile is possible.’ – Thich Nhat Hanh; excerpt from The Buddha’s Smile

SONG: Fine on the Outside by Priscilla Ahn

MOVIE: When Marnie Was There (2014)

deck-bottom: XVII The Star Rx, Red Historian (John Dee) & Priestess of Protection

[Moon PAC Masterlist] [Patreon] [Paid Readings] [buymeaboba]

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 1 – Deliciously Enjoying Your New-World-Building

e m p a t h y – 3 of Pentacles

There was a time, you built a world up from the ground, with people you thought were your people. Or at least, you thought you wanted to build a world around or with these people. But then you became disillusioned. You realised they were ungrateful, or perhaps, they didn’t quite see the world the way you did. What you thought they wanted similarly as you, in the end turned up to be quite the contrary. Then you realised the Universe had all along planned for y’all to grow differently~

Now you’re done with that old paradigm where you’d been too helpful towards those unworthy of your companionship, or even compassion. Facing forward, you now know that the most important thing is to surround yourself with people of similar ‘values’ and not just ‘goals’ or ‘ambitions’. Spiritual values go far deeper than just shared economy LOL ‘Corporate goals’ or whatever some such 3D-based nonsense. None of that interests you at this point in your spiritual evolution. You want something bigger, more awesome in meaning!

m e r c y – 5 of Cups

You’re still healing or just fresh out of spiritual rehab from this feeling of having lost people and whatnot. But it’s all good because, ‘The peace I have now is worth everything I’ve lost.’ If you’re truly honest with yourself, I’m sure you’re actually glad to have lost these losers. You know deep inside they would’ve never been able to survive what you’ve survived. In many ways, you also know these small minds were never destined for the greatness that you know is just around the corner for you~!

So I think, right now you’re still balancing your thoughts and emotions. There’s another quote that says: ‘Sometimes your heart needs some more time to accept what your mind already knows.’ And that perfectly captures the aenergy you’re currently swimming in. But look around—wow, isn’t it peaceful? The clouds are finally parting and your world is warm again <3

c o m m i s s a r y – 2 of Pentacles

After having gone through the mental struggle you’ve had to deal with, you’re stronger and fiercer in your capacity to deal with bullshit. I see that you’re quicker to deflect someone’s disrespectful behaviour and you’re not tolerating people acting out at the expense of your peace of mind anymore. Back in those days, you compromised so much of your own values to accommodate people’s ‘feelings’ but you’ve realised now that those very people often didn’t think about your feelings or how they’d put you in an awkward situation.

This FM in Pisces, you’re gaining a deeper layer of understanding of the mechanism of the crazies you’ve had to deal with up until fairly recently. I’ve this feeling that you’re dealing with the last remnants of those heartbreaks. You’re not going to ever deal with these thoughts and feelings anymore, so think about them for the last time and bid farewell for good~ From here onwards, you’re peacefully enjoying a new new-world-building without those crickets, so~ HAHAH <3

full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘

Gold Astronomer (John Dee) & Priestess of Patience

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 2 – Done ‘Experimenting’ with Bullshit/Sorrow

e m p a t h y – Page of Wands

Oh, this is the ‘empathetic weirdo’ pile! You must be a Pisces in some way LMAO

This is a very strange aenergy in which you’ve been in this phase of ‘exposing’ yourself to bullshit and suffering in the grander scheme of the Human Experience. You’ve been ‘assuming’ this role of an experimenter or some such, exposing yourself to some degree of toxic experiences for ‘research purposes.’ It was imperative that you had firsthand experiences with various-but-specific kinds of bullshit surrounding this whole Matrix World, all so that you know how to dissolve them once and for all through the act of alchemical transmutation.

You’re a natural transmuter of ‘negative constructs of Reality’, believe it or not. The whole idea of your ‘little experiment’ was for you to have a hands-on experience with certain aspects of suffering within this Matrix, so that you’d be able to ‘vote down’ on qualities that you do not like. In this way, you may resonate with being a Blue-Ray Starseed or a Crystal/Rainbow Child of a Lightworker~

m e r c y – King of Pentacles

Yes, you’re a part of the board members that are able to give your ‘disagreement’ upon negative qualities that are commonplace in this Earth Matrix. The magical thing about your very existence here is that as long as you DISAGREE with something, anything that’s wrong/undesirable about this world, it immediately dissolves. Well, depends on what you’re disagreeing with, but eventually it all dissolves with your dislike and disagreement. You’re just that powerful, you capable but dehydrated bitch~ XD

If you’re ever interested in becoming a public speaker, a content creator, or a whatever else what will allow you to reach, connect and convey your epiphanies to a larger audience, all the more wonderful. You’re meant to be heard and listened to—you’re too wise to live an offline existence in this era of digital connectivity ;P You have a power within you that can potentially encourage and motivate others to co-create a more positive Reality for themselves through their own power of agreeing and disagreeing with bullshit ^o^v

c o m m i s s a r y – 2 of Wands

Anyway, you’re now done experimenting, babe~ I see you. You’ve suffered enough in the name of commiserating with ‘normies’. In some ways, you might’ve also just been breaking generational curses and karma. But that’s all mostly over now! You’ve known enough; you’ve gained enough data/information for building perspectives; you’ve studied enough for an entire lifetime. You’ve exposed yourself to enough of the horrors of the world; now you can clean up and return to your natural state of paradise and peace.

You can still do the magickal work of spiritually transmuting the world’s bullshit from your natural habitat of high-speed manifestation. But now, you’re not a commiserator anymore; not a soldier anymore—you’re a billionaire philanthropist hahahah You see, you have the know-how, the resources and the power to help, but you don’t have to suffer together. Celebrate in this return! You’re YOU again! You’re your true Divine You again!

full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘

Silver Alchemist (Ramon Llull) & Priestess of Inspiration

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 3 – You Can Now Eat the Cake, Too

e m p a t h y – Ace of Pentacles Rx

More than even Pile 2, you seem to have dealt with an even greater amount of lack throughout your Life. This may be a financial lack for some, but for the most part, this Pile is really talking about a general lack of proverbial SUNSHINE! It almost feels like you’ve never truly been happy or free practically your entire Lyfe! Maybe some of you will resonate with being this way for a long time instead of an entire Life XD Yeah anyway, that was the spiritual lesson, which may have been a carry-on from some previous incarnations~

But now, you’re fucking done. You can have the cake and eat it, too! You know why? Because you’re a goddamn cake factory, that’s why! You’re now able to produce endless amounts of cakes and that’s the secret to your abundance for the remainder of your days. But you’re not greedy either, so the Universe really favours that, too! And sometimes, you always have cakes around because you have other people giving you cakes~ \`★_★`/

m e r c y – 5 of Pentacles Rx

To be quite honest, in a weird way, this aenergy is making me think of royal families LMAO Like these ‘royal’ fuckers ain’t do nothin’ but they keep receivin’. They keep having the best of everything with taxpayers’ munny tsk tsk… I know you ain’t a fucker like ‘em, but this is just the image that comes to mind LMAO It’s a vibe that’s giving ‘Universe’s favourite’ or ‘I get paid for just existing’ and all some such. But unlike evil ‘royals’ on Earth, you’ve achieved this level of abundance because you’ve tapped into your Spiritual Royalty consciousness~ ♥︎

Right now, I’m seeing you take care of your body, mentality, spirituality, sanity, but most of all, body. Yes, body and habits. You’re being asked/guided to re-build your healthy habits, your sane rhythm. You’re returning to old-but-positive habits that might’ve been robbed of you as you were surviving some of Life’s toughest challenges! Some habits or comfort activities you might simply have forgotten, and now you’re reclaiming them ^-^v

c o m m i s s a r y – IV The Emperor Rx

Many of you tuning into this have been deep in the process of dissolving an entire paradigm of lack caused by trauma, done by some ‘authority figures’ in your childhood, or younger years. This mostly has something to do with ‘discipline’? Or some sense of needing to be ‘humble’ and ‘regulated’ while in reality they were instilling a scarcity mindset in you. Very evil. Very manipulative. The whole time, these figures were never as ‘limited’ as they were shaping you to be.

You could’ve also been judged so harshly and unfairly, to a point where you became overly critical of even the smallest things about yourself. In your mind, there was this bullshit panopticon that was always policing your conducts, even your mind! In some sense, you could’ve struggled with having a ‘good girl syndrome’ kind of problem tsk tsk… Yeah, that’s all in the past though. This reading is literally just giving you validation and clarity ^-^v I promise you that your happy days are impenetrable now~♪

full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘

Red Geographer (Marco Polo) & Priestess of Happiness

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

[Moon PAC Masterlist] [Patreon] [Paid Readings] [buymeaboba]

[flower-boi16]

I personally disagree with the claims that Stolas is a coercive rapist. I don't want to start an argument I just want to show you my perspective, alright here we go.

Let's start at Harvest Moon Festival: 'When this happens, it's not really something I fuss about...' and 'Well, I'm not a fan of someone I offered a job to about to off my easiest lengthy ticket to Earth behind my back.' Notice how Blitz says 'easiest lengthy ticket' here, not 'only ticket', and Blitz knows about Asmodean Crystals, as evidenced by Unhappy Campers where he forces someone to use it to create a portal to the living world, so the Grimoire was never the only option Blitz could've used to run I.M.P. Sure losing the grimoire would've disrupted business for a bit, but again, it was never Blitz's only option. It's also been confirmed in Ghostfuckers that I.M.P used to assassin jobs in Hell before Blitz got the Grimoire from Stolas, I.M.P was running fine without the Grimoire, if Blitz couldn't get his hands on the Grimoire or the Asmodeun Crystal he and his could always just run missions in Hell, so the coercion argument already falls flat there, but let's beat it up a bit further shall we?

Now let's look at Ozzies, at the ending of it Stolas never pressures or forces Blitz into having sex with him or quote 'We could talk, or… watch a movie, or… maybe cuddle?', Blitz turns Stolas down here, and Stolas never forces or pressures Blitz into doing said things with him, and you know what this also proves? It proves that Blitz has always the self-agency to tell Stolas 'no I don't want to fuck you', which also shows that Blitz actually wanted to have sex with Stolas, which we can prove by the text messages Stolas and Blitz had after Ozzie's.

The text messages at the end of Western Energy show that Stolas is actively giving Blitz the option to not fuck him, which also tells us that Blitz always had the option to tell Stolas no, and hell, we can see in the All 2 U song that Blitz turned down Stolas most likely asking Blitz to stay after the sex, proving even further Blitz always had the self-agency to tell Stolas no, which shows that Blitz wanted to have sex with Stolas.

And I'm not even counting everything about what happened in Full Moon. Blitz literally sings about how much he enjoys sex with Stolas, spends the whole day buying things to use on Stolas, begged for Stolas to keep the deal, said multiple times about how much the deal is something he enjoyed and wanted to keep, and told Loona and M&M about how Stolas never forced anything on him which lead to months without intimacy between them. Where is the coercion??? Simply, it's not there.

Now let's look at Apology Tour, Blitz wants the arrangement back, to fuck Stolas again. Which tells us something that the people peddling the nonsense 'Stolas is a rapist' argument entirely ignore, Blitz is the one unhappy with the arrangement ending, not Stolas, Blitz.

Also, Blitz has the Asmodeun Crystal by this point, He could've easily have just told Stolas to fuck off and leave if he was truly being coerced and raped by him, but he chooses to stay because at this point he thinks this gesture is a farewell gift from Stolas, and it's been made very clear that Blitz has strong feelings for Stolas by this point despite his self-hatred, that he doesn't want to lose Stolas, which also helps to further prove that Blitz wanted to have sex with Stolas out of his entire free will.

Blitz having sex with Stolas was a way for Blitz to be close to Stolas without having to be vulnerable, and when Stolas gets rid of the arrangement Blitz is scared because it would force Blitz to be vulnerable towards Stolas.

Is all of this really the behavior of a person who felt coerced into sex he didn't want to have? Because I think it's pretty clear that Blitz at no point felt coerced into having sex with Stolas, and the people that claim otherwise I have good grounds to believe aren't even watching the same show anymore.

.....sigh...

...before I start this long rant post I just want to say I'm grateful that your being civil in this ask. I'm glad you chose to state your reasoning rather than being made because I critisizied your favourite funny demon show.

However, I don't agree with any of this reasoning. There's a lot to break down here so I'll just split this post into two sections:

1. Stolitz IS Coercian, and Here's Why

So you start off by bringing up what Blitz says in The Harvest Moon Festival and how the grimoire isn't Blitz's only option for being able to do his job. That is true but...it doesn't change the fact that Stolas is threatening to take away an item that Blitz needs in order for his buisness to function in order to force Blitz into having consent with him, and so Blitz woulden't have that much of a choice.

Yes he could have gotten an Asmodean crystal but the fact he never did that in the first place is a plot hole in it of itself. And, if anything, the presence of other options just makes Stolas look even worse; Stolas could have just lent the book to Blitz in secret, or he could have just given Blitz the Asmodean crystal and move on with his day, but no, Stolas chose the option to put Blitz in a situation where Blitz HAD to consent to him or he'll lose the one thing he needs for his job.

And, Blitz fully believes the book to be his only option. The Full Moon literally has Blitz begging and pleading for Stolas to not end the deal because he needs the book. He would not have this reaction if he knew of other options, therefore he thinks that the book is his only real option (which makes very little sense but we'll just roll with it since that's what the show is presenting to us).

And then there's my last point which is Murder Family, the episode where Stolas first makes the deal with Blitz. This is the one scene people point to when they call Blitz corcian, and, there's a reason for that.

Stolas literally called Blitz when he was being chased by a lunatic with a shot gun. Blitz only consented because he was in an emotionally stressful state of mind and did not have any time to actually process or think about the deal, NOT because he was into having sex with Stolas, which makes the "Stolitz isn't coercian because Blitz had a choice" argument fall flat, because in the moment of the deal he didn't.

And even if he wasn't in a stressful emotional state, he is still being put in a situation where he HAS to consent or he'll lose the one thing he needs for his job by someone with much more power than him, and again, Blitz DOES THINK that the grimoire is his one option. Even if Blitz never felt coerced...he still was coerced. There isn't much changing that. Someone can say they weren't stabbed but they were still stabbed, someone can say they were SA'd but were still SA'd. This doesn't change shit.

It is deffiently true that there are hints for Blitz having affection for Stolas though, but the thing is, that makes ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE. Why? Well, simple.

2. Blitz has NO REASON to Love Stolas (And Here's Why)

Yes. You read that title correctly. Blitz should not have ANY FORM of affection towards Stolas what so ever. If anything, he has every reason to dislike him.

Let's actually look at what Stolas has done to Blitz (both the good and bad).

THE GOOD:

Did some small nice things to Blitz like giving him gifts, laughing at his jokes, and generally showing that he did have some level of care for him...which were all off-screen....

...

...

......?

...........?

..................??????????

Ya...so....that's kind of it. And now...

THE BAD:

Forcing Blitz to consent to a deal where he HAD to consent with him or he will lose his job

Belittling, dehumanizing, and constantly invading Blitz's boundries

Flirting with Blitz even when he explicitly tells him that he's uncomfortable

Not taking Blitz's attempts at setting up boundries seriously

Ya. So. I rest my case. There is no reason for Blitz to have any form of affection or to want any form of affection out of Stolas given how Stolas has treated Blitz throughout the show; the few good things Stolas does for Blitz that we are supposed to see as the reasons for why Blitz would fall in love with him fall flat because not only are they off-screen, they also don't make up for the bad.

Sure, you could say that Blitz doesn't hold any of this against Stolas but...he should. He should be mad over Stolas constantly invading his boundries even when he tells him no, he should be mad over the deal, and he should be mad over Stolas constantly make him uncomfortable.

Yet, we are supposed to believe that Blitz has feelings for Stolas despite the fact he has no reason to. Also, if Stolas apperently always cared about Blitz's boundries...than explain Loo Loo Land. Explain why Stolas continued flirting with Blitz constantly even when he could clearly see that Blitz was uncomfortable. Explain why he consistantly dehumanized Blitz over the course of the show by treating him like a sex object. Explain why Stolas continued calling Blitz pet names in The Harvest Moon Festival in front of a whole crowd of people even when Blitz was, once again, annoyed and uncomfortable.

And you can't use the "Oh Stolas didn't know what he was doing was wrong/He meant well" because the fact that Stolas knows about the basic laws of consent means that he knew EXACTLY what he was doing in all of these scenes. He should reconized Blitz being uncomfortable when ever he made his advancements if he really cared about Blitz's consent, but, even then, he never did for some reason until now.

So I don't buy the idea that the deal was a way for Blitz to have sex with Stolas without being vulnerable because A. He did not consent to it willingly and B. There is no believable reason for why Blitz would have genuine feelings for Stolas after how we've seen Stolas treat him (and, being honest, Stolas shouldn't love Blitz either).

If you want me to believe that these two would ever fall in love, actually show scenes developing believable chemistry between them so I can see why they would love each other. For whatever reason Blitz may have to love Stolas, that reason should have been shown across the series rather than being kept on the back burner. It doesn't make sense for Blitz to love Stolas, sorry, but you can't convince that Blitz has any reason to fall in love with him.

(Also, a few things; I'm pretty sure what the writers were trying to commuinicate with the full moon scene was that Blitz was trying to process Stolas' desicion to give him the crystal since he never experinced any kind of kindess like this before or something like that, so the argument that Blitz reacted the way he did because he loved Stolas falls flat)

3. Conclusion

Ya. So uh. I don't agree with any of this shit. I'm sorry but there's no defending this relationship lol. It's a complete mess of bad writting and I don't think you can change my mind on that. I could go into more detail but...I think I've said all I needed to say.

[carto0ncritter]

I just want to say that I personally disagree with the claims that Stolas is a coercive rapist. You don't have to agree with me. I just want to share my perspective. Alright, here we go.

Let's start at Harvest Moon Festival: 'When this happens, it's not really something I fuss about...' and 'Well, I'm not a fan of someone I offered a job to about to off my easiest lengthy ticket to Earth behind my back.' Notice how Blitz says 'easiest lengthy ticket' here, not 'only ticket', and Blitz knows about Asmodean Crystals, as evidenced by Unhappy Campers where he forces someone to use it to create a portal to the living world, so the Grimoire was never the only option Blitz could've used to run I.M.P. Sure losing the grimoire would've disrupted business for a bit, but again, it was never Blitz's only option. It's also been confirmed in Ghostfuckers that I.M.P used to assassin jobs in Hell before Blitz got the Grimoire from Stolas, I.M.P was running fine without the Grimoire, if Blitz couldn't get his hands on the Grimoire or the Asmodeun Crystal he and his could always just run missions in Hell, so the coercion argument already falls flat there, but let's beat it up a bit further shall we?

Now let's look at Ozzies, at the ending of it Stolas never pressures or forces Blitz into having sex with him or quote 'We could talk, or… watch a movie, or… maybe cuddle?', Blitz turns Stolas down here, and Stolas never forces or pressures Blitz into doing said things with him, and you know what this also proves? It proves that Blitz has always the self-agency to tell Stolas 'no I don't want to fuck you', which also shows that Blitz actually wanted to have sex with Stolas, which we can prove by the text messages Stolas and Blitz had after Ozzie's.

The text messages at the end of Western Energy show that Stolas is actively giving Blitz the option to not fuck him, which also tells us that Blitz always had the option to tell Stolas no, and hell, we can see in the All 2 U song that Blitz turned down Stolas most likely asking Blitz to stay after the sex, proving even further Blitz always had the self-agency to tell Stolas no, which shows that Blitz wanted to have sex with Stolas.

And I'm not even counting everything about what happened in Full Moon episode. Blitz literally sings about how much he enjoys sex with Stolas, spends the whole day buying things to use on Stolas, begged for Stolas to keep the deal, said multiple times about how much the deal is something he enjoyed and wanted to keep, and told Loona and M&M about how Stolas never forced anything on him which lead to months without intimacy between them. Where is the coercion??? Simply, it's not there.

Now let's look at Apology Tour, Blitz wants the arrangement back, to fuck Stolas again. Which tells us something that the people peddling the bullshit 'Stolas is a rapist' argument entirely ignore, Blitz is the one unhappy with the arrangement ending, not Stolas, Blitz.

Also, Blitz has the Asmodeun Crystal by this point, he could've easily have just told Stolas to fuck off and leave if he was truly being coerced and raped by him, but he chooses to stay because at this point he thinks this gesture is a farewell gift from Stolas, and it's been made very clear that Blitz has strong feelings for Stolas by this point despite his self-hatred, that he doesn't want to lose Stolas, which also helps to further prove that Blitz wanted to have sex with Stolas out of his entire free will.

Blitz having sex with Stolas was a way for Blitz to be close to Stolas without having to be vulnerable, and when Stolas gets rid of the arrangement Blitz is scared because it would force Blitz to be vulnerable towards Stolas.

Is all of this really the behavior of a person who felt coerced into sex he didn't want to have? Because I think it's pretty clear that Blitz at no point felt coerced into having sex with Stolas, and the people that claim otherwise I have good grounds to believe aren't even watching the same show anymore.

i think i can sum up everything you said here, from my pov, in one sentence: "A part of Blitz craved Stolas' "affection" and "interest" in him because he had never experienced true love before (+ all the trauma in his past really fucked him up when it comes to opening up his heart and recieveing love and not pushing people away), and pretty much got hooked to the "relationship" despite Stolas' gaslighting, name calling and manipulative tendencies"

long story short, blitz fell in love with his abuser and is unable to break free. symbolically, he cant break the chains

[warblogs17282]

Been a bit since apology tour dropped but my god I cannot get over this scene I love it. Small analysis on it included.

I love how it starts with Blitz being Blitz, coming up with a fast comeback to what Stolas said, but just like the mention of the harvest moon festival assassination attempt, the truth slips out again. The truth all about the huge extent Blitz's self hatred makes him feel towards Stolas, and how Blitz assumes Stolas feels towards him. Despite everything, at this point in time Blitz cannot understand that Stolas was actually loving Blitz for Blitz, not for the arrangement it started out as, with the sex being the one thing that Blitz sees being useful for Stolas.

Blitz cannot fathom a reality where he's loved for being himself, Blitz always feels like he needs to give/do something to get something in return, because that's how it worked in the circus, with that one being Blitz has to steal from Stolas to be able to help the circus and most importantly, his mother.

That kind of abuse combined with the arrangement 25 years later just kept reinforcing the idea into Blitz's head that he has to be able to provide something to be able to be 'loved' or cared about.

Blitz is a walking contradiction (which I love him for), he craves actual love, but runs away when it's actually given to him right in the open, as seen with Verosika, Blitz also sees himself as not being loveable as well, the crush he had on Fizzarolli back in the circus going up in literal flames, and the fact that he crossed himself out of every single picture is yet another constant reminder to Blitz that he isn't loveable. Again, he needs that love, as can be seen when Blitz says that he's gonna die alone, as can be seen in this scene as well, 'could never love someone like me', this line makes it so painfully clear that Blitz truly did love Stolas, because he says it like he's upset and hurt that Stolas never loved him back in Blitz's eyes.

Also, can we talk about how the class difference and Stolas being accidentally racist/classist plays a huge part in that speech as well?

'I was convinced that a prince could never love someone like me.' They bring the racism/classism right back into the focal point with this line again, the first time with the 'I don't look down on you', being Stolas' true feelings about it, with Stolas not knowing why what he said hurts Blitz so much, and with the second mention of the racism/classism issue showing Blitz's true feelings about what Stolas said about Blitz and imps in general. Blitz is truly hurt and upset over Stolas treating imps like they're below him, even if it's not on purpose. With the major example of this being in truth seekers, that hallucination scene confirming a few things, but the most important being that Blitz sees Stolas as being above him, not as equals. Which Stolas' racism/classism up to this point would massively back up his beliefs that Stolas sees himself as above Blitz, even in apology tour Blitz still has all the reasons to believe that it's true that Stolas sees himself as higher than Blitz, because all Blitz sees is that Stolas is denying he's done any wrong to Blitz in regards to the class difference, confirming Blitz's viewpoint yet again.

It's so well crafted man I can't get enough of it.

[oddly-casual]

Gaap Goemon appreciation post/ Character Analysis

because I need y'all to hype him up as much as I do.

I was a fan of the Mairimashita Iruma Kun anime many moons ago, and just recently I got back into it. Finished the manga. Walked away loving the entire Misfit class. Most of all, I see a criminal lack of Gaap content. So, here's why I love Gaap and why I think you should too.

By all accounts, there isnt a whole lot of focus or information about Gaap that goes beyond the depth of a kiddy pool. (It's like that for most of the misfits tbh...) Still, Gaap gets more focus than most.

Kindness and care:

The thing about Gaap that stands out the most, is how much of a natural caretaker this kid is.

He greets everyone he meets with respect. Often using the honorific "Dono" Which google tells me translates to "Lord" or "Master". Almost every time he greets somebody he always has an offer of Hell tea and onigiri. He always makes sure to take care of his guests and his friends. This kid has no shortage of manners. So polite.

In the Harvest Festival arc, Gaap is the one who goes out to save the other students even when Agares has valid points about why rescuing a bunch of demons they dont know wouldn't benefit them in any way. In the festival, where the entire point is to be a cut above the rest, what did Gaap do?

We see little examples of Gaap's kindness. How he defends his friends and is usually on the front lines whenever someone's well-being is cause for concern.

This boy is the mom friend who always had a painkiller and a stack of bandaids on hand. He's such a mom friend that he canonically fights with Jazz when it comes to taking care of their classmates. (They both have a caretaker complex.)

It's also the way Gaap responds to stress! In the Heartbreaker arc, Gaap is paired up with two first-years who won't stop fighting. This obviously stresses the boy out, because he had high expectations of getting along with his first years, but it didn't turn out that way.

The first thing Gaap does is try to offer them food, something we see Gap do to Agares when he snaps at him. When the offer of food doesnt work, he instead tries to assure the first years that everything will be fine. Even if Gaap isn't confident, his first instinct is to try to appeal to and take care of people. Even if that's not what they want.

It’s interesting, because Gaap doesn’t physically get in between them, like you would expect him to do. He avoids conflict when it gets physical, despite being such a capable fighter. (Though when it comes to saving others, he has no problem acting.)

Friends and Habits:

We get to know Gaap the most when he's around other people. Obviously, because he's a secondary character. I think another aspect of this is because Gaap is a social creature, he thrives around people. We rarely see Gaap standing alone and this makes sense because his goal is to have 100 allies.

In the demon world, we know that demons usually dont care about saving or helping others if it doesnt help them. Nor do they have the drive to see their efforts to the end, because they get bored rather quickly. Gaap breaks out of this status quo, along with the rest of the Misfits, by stubbornly pushing towards his goal even when the fruits of his labor dont bloom right away.

The biggest showcase of this drive is the person Gaap takes care of the most, that we know of.

Chapter 111 shows us that Gaap came to Agares' house every day. check it, every day. Gaap would go out of his way with breakfast and pick Agares up so he could make it to class.

Agares clearly doesnt want to go, but Gaap takes him anyway, refusing to leave him behind. From what we can guess, he's been doing it before they started training together. Which could mean Gaap didn't know this kid, but saw he wasn't going to class and went to go take care of him. (Classic extrovert adopting their introvert friend).

We see how that kindness affects Agares as a result. Agares feels guilty when he snaps at Gaap and goes out of his way to visit Gaap when he doesn't show up for class. (This could also mean Agares went to class on his own, without Gaap having to force him.)

Agares was also willing to help the people Gaap saved. Even when telling Gaap not to go out and save those people, Agares still houses them, keeps them safe, and even plans an escape route for the other students when things look bad. It's a lot of hassle for a character who hates being bothered. Gaap's kindness is contagious, even if it's not obvious at first glance.

Oh, Maybe He's Kinda Fucked Up?

No one escapes childhood unscathed.

Gaap is a caretaker, he does it happily. Even so, when you put yourself in the position to take care of others, there are parts of yourself that fall into neglect that you dont realize.

After the Heartbreaker arc (Chapter 272), Gaap is noticeably absent. We find out later, what happens when you fuck with the nice guy too much.

Maybe it was his crushed expectations, the stress of failing and losing, or maybe Gaap was just tired of being nice but he goes apeshit. Accidentally slipping into his Wicked cycle and nearly driving two students mad with his fucked up face.

We learn that showing your true face is a big no-no in the Gaap household. It's literally written on the walls, and Gaap feels immense shame and embarrassment that he broke a family rule.

He hides his face in his hands, and puts a bag over his face when Agares comes over. He's afraid of hurting someone again, even though the stress of those events have passed.

We dont know his parents' reaction, (because aint no way they dont know) Whether Gaap was disciplined by his parents or not, Gaap put this huge weight on his shoulders. Not blaming the stress of the situation, but blaming himself for losing control.

Gaap specifically said, “I panicked”. Which could mean that with all the stressors, he snapped and just lashed out. Gaap didn't willingly enter his wicked phase, I think he just gave in to his instincts. His bloodline originally started by warding off predators with their maddening appearance. What is panic if not your brain responding as if your body is in danger?

Despite Gaap reasonably getting upset, he still feels terrible for the trouble he caused and the students he hurt. The first thing he did after waking up was to ask if he could apologize to the first years for mentally scarring them.

Gaap’s ambition is to make 100 allies. It's pretty sweet. When a teenager says it(Gaap looks 17 yrs old), It just sounds like he wants to have friends. Pair this up with the fact that Gaap rarely asks for anything in return, and suddenly his wanting a ton of friends makes sense for someone who looks his age. Gaap takes care of people because he wants them to like him. (Even if he can drive them away with how much he cares.)

I have no idea where this desire comes from. If it's something his family drills into him, to be sociable and network, or if it's just a personal goal because of his ugly ahh face.

Regardless, this moment makes me want to lie down on the road while it rains:

Despite how much his ambition means to him, he is willing to isolate himself as long as it means no one else gets hurt. This speaks to his good intentions. It isn't just about the popularity or all the favors he could have from knowing so many demons. It's about forming genuine relationships with other demons and providing them a soft place to land and build community.

Look at my son, he tries so hard.

My final point:

Look at how cool he is. This is Chapter 76, my boy came out the gate swinging with powerful bloodline magic. He's got the position, he's got technique, he's got flare. What more could you ask for?

Gaap started out as rank 2, and since then has had no problem leveling himself up. Gaap always stays on his feet (Hence his nickname Busy Body), not letting himself fall behind his classmates. He aced his training and had since learned to use Wind as a companion and not as a tool. He even developed a full-range attack where he can pick which targets get hit by his swing and which dont. He is leveling up in the world. Dont hurt em now Gaap.

Conclusion:

I'm the equivalent of those parents who show off pictures of their kids from their wallet.

Gaap as a character, in the story he's in, isn't anything really new or groundbreaking. Even still, in a story like Mairimashita Iruma-Kun, the Misfit class are demons that are different. We get to learn why they're different, and how they learn to overcome these challenges despite how they threaten to hold them back.

Gaap is a good kid that you watch succeed from the background. We see him struggle and fall apart, but he never stops caring about others in that process. He's that good-natured kid in your life that you hope succeeds because in a cruel world, they make the decision to be kind.

If anyone made it this far, slay. Even if you never noticed Gaap before, I hope you have a new appreciation for his character. Nishi took time and love to write him out, I think that deserves attention too.

[yeahtimesten]

a playlist for art donaldson ✩ ₊˚🎧⊹♡

a cute lil playlist for artie bae :3 this is what i think the vibes would be in a relationship with him. it’s a lil cutesie, cheeky, vintage, and sickeningly sweet

hello it’s me - todd rundgren think of me you know that i’d be with you if i could i'll come around to see you once in a while or if i ever need a reason to smile and spend the night if you think i should

touch tank - quinnie he’s so pretty when he goes down on me gold-skinned eager baby, blue shirt out the laundry

steeeam - shelly touch me the right way baby and i’ll do it again i’ll do it again

sara smile - daryl hall & john oats when i feel cold, you warm me and when i feel i can’t go on you come and hold me it’s you and me forever

la la love you - pixies all i’m saying, pretty baby la la love you don’t mean maybe

cape cod kwassa kwassa - vampire weekend is your bed made? is your sweater on? do you wanna fuck? like you know i do

to know him is to love him - amy winehouse and i do, and i do, and i do oh, i'll be good to him, ill bring joy to him oh, everyone says there’ll come a day where ill walk alongside of him

sweet - cigarettes after sex it’s so sweet, knowing that you love me though we don’t need to say it to each other, sweet knowing that i love you, and running my fingers through your hair it’s so sweet

real love baby - father john misty i want a real love, baby there’s a world inside me got the key, just use it, just if for a minute

this must be the place - talking heads out of all those kinds of people you’ve got a face with a view i’m just an animal looking for a home and share the same space for a minute or two

i live for you - george harrison all this time my thoughts return to you give my love, that’s all i can do wait in line til i feel you inside yes it’s true, i live for you

there is a light that never goes out - the smiths take me out tonight oh, take me anywhere i don’t care, i don’t care, i don’t care

harvest moon - neil young because i’m still in love with you i wanna see you dance again because i'm still in love with you on this harvest moon

bed chem - sabrina carpenter where art thou? why not uponeth me? see it in my mind let’s fulfill the prophecy

bodyclosetomine - bones first time i met you your beauty almost made me pine now all i want is your body close to mine i swear on everything, i will do you right

our house - crosby, stills, nash, & young staring at the fire for hours and hours while i listen to you play your love songs all night long, for me, only for me

a/n - yayyyy i hope you guys fuck with this vibe!! lots of song on this list that are coming from his point of view. sara smile is definitely him when he’s had a rough day at practice or is stressed about finals or going thru insecure thoughts and he just neeeeeds you with him in bed stroking his hair ;-; or ur having a bad day and he’s just reassuring you how much he loves you and needs you and wants to see u smile

[h-didanart]

Bloodmoon in dresses collection, round 2!

You thought I was done? So did I, but! Inspiration came back! And so I will now kick off the second round of this blog’s Bloodmoon in dresses collection.

One thing to note is that there are new participants, Bloodmoons from other aus that I hadn’t thought of for a while until someone (*coughs* @achickennamedcheese) asked me how many Bloodmoons I have. They are all here though, and they look rather dashing.

Starting us off, Magical Bloodmoon; Harvest Moon and Sturgeon Moon.

They didn’t need to look too far to find their dress, they already had one! Sure it was a skirt and some cool clothes but it’d still work. On top of that they could flaunt their cool shape shifting powers and they cool shape shifting weapon, so why wouldn’t they go for it? Might as well upstage everyone else in this whole damn place

They are having a lot of fun with this.

Next up, someone who you guys might not recognize on account of me not drawing or talking about them in so long. God of Doom Bloodmoon; Adaptation.

Adaptation himself has absolutely zero control over how Morpho decides to present them, so they didn’t particularly care when the butterfly put them in a dress. He did care when the winged death bringer pushed him to the front and basically let them run around and do whatever. He might be a bit self conscious now, but who is he to deny some time to hangout with their twin and the many other versions of themselves that are in that place?

There’s not enough red in his opinion

Last newcomer! I present to you, the amnesiac twins; Ruby and Vermillion.

Unlike around 99.8% of Bloodmoons, Ruby and Vermillion aren’t very close. Waking up so suddenly with no knowledge of anything or anyone and then learning that there’s someone else in their head was a very bad first impression for one another about each other. They both differ on tastes and likes greatly and don’t have much to bond over besides their dislike for the old them. It comes as no surprise then that they’d have trouble choosing something to wear for this event. On one hand Ruby just grabbed whatever he could and called it a day, making Vermillion feel very bad at the asymmetry of it all; on the other Vermillion chose stuff that makes sense and forms a cohesive color palette on top of being comfy, but Ruby absolutely hates the textures.

We can only hope those two come to an understanding at some point.

And finally, to wrap up this post we have the second design for one of the swap Bloodmoons; Fang.

Fang didn’t know what to do for the second round. Fang could steal from the Sun-man again, but didn’t want to, Fang wanted to stay with the other Others. So Fang had to think about what to do that wouldn’t require to go outside. Fang remembered that together with Scythe they usually had a combination of clothes that had a skirt, so Fang decided to wear the clothes the twins would wear together.

Sadly Fang cannot put the hood on

And that’s all for today! Dunno when I’ll be back, but thanks for dropping by, bye!

[glade-constellation]

I think I’m starting to realize that Nexus may be one of the most misunderstood characters in the show.

Am I a fan of Nexus? No, not really. I find him funny to watch because, besides EAPS Monty, he says the most out of pocket shit. Never know what to expect when he opens his mouth. But besides that, I just can’t find any interest in him.

That being said, I recently have been doing a deep dive of his character to prove a theory I had, which turned out to be partially canon in today’s episode. I didn’t think Nexus had the Ruin virus, I don’t think he ever had it. After watching one of the introductory episodes in EAPS, I started to theorize that Nexus became what he is purely because he is a Moon. I still think this is true, and was simply sped up by the harvesting of dark star power.

This might be a long post, so strap in.

So. Nexus. I don’t feel dramatic in saying he’s possibly one of the most hated TSAMS characters, or at least most of the fandom’s least favorite. A good bit of the fandom believed he was infected by the Ruin virus, or was just a victim of terrible story writing, because it just didn’t seem possible for him to go this far. Sure, he was deeply traumatized by Solar’s death on top of many other things, but that didn’t seem like it would turn him completely evil. I was also one of the people who believed the Infection theory, as shown by my many posts during Nexus’ corruption arc.

Funnily enough, it was Eclipse of all characters that changed my view of Nexus and who he is. During “Eclipse and Puppet meet the NEW SUN”, Eclipse makes a very big point in relating himself back to the original Moon. It’s something I remembered from Eclipse’s lore, but had never really sat down and thought over. I believe @/samoftheswamp had a post that I 100% agreed with. Eclipse has all the memories of the original Moon before the separation, but is only made up of the kill code and very small fragments of Moon coding-wise. Everything else about Eclipse in that regard was filled in by Sun. He then continued to tear apart his own coding to make Bloodmoon and Lunar. Despite all of this, due to his memories, Eclipse still very much considers himself to be the original Moon.

How does any of this relate to Nexus? Simple. The coding and memories. Despite Eclipse and Nexus being completely opposites in both of those things, Eclipse still falls in line with Moons far more than he does Suns. V4 Eclipse talks a lot about how much his old self, and even current self, acts so similar to Moons. Though he appears as a Sun, Eclipse is a Moon by emotional and psychological standards.

I would also like to point out that Solar specifically say the only reason he was different from most Eclipse’s was due to his Sun’s influence. Everything that happened to Eclipse also happened to Solar up until his Sun decided to try and help him. That means that Solar also falls under the Moon category.

Now that we’ve established who counts as a Moon, let’s get into why this is important. One thing every single Moon has had in common so far is their villain arc. Moon has had several mini ones, mostly influenced by other people. Eclipse was a villain up until very recently. Solar was almost a villain until his Sun stepped in. Killcode was a villain until his change of heart. Bloodmoon was just, a villain. Hell, even Cringe Dimension Moon went evil. And now we have Nexus.

Am I saying all Moons are destined to become villains? Yes, but no. I think all Moons have a possibility of becoming a villain, and it is their choice to be one or not. Every Moon we meet tends to go through some sort of catastrophic event that leads them to this choice. OG Moon was built with a kill code. Eclipse, Solar, KC, and Bloodmoon all were a piece of that kill code in some way, on top of other trauma in some cases. Nexus never had the kill code, but he’s been through several different instances of trauma. He literally woke up to the world under Eclipse’s rule. He also had to witness the death of someone he considered a brother in his very own arms. All of these characters have had an instance where they were able to choose between being good or evil. Solar shows that Eclipse didn’t have to be evil, his coding wasn’t fully controlling his actions. He chose to be a villain. Killcode was evil by design, but chose to become good, whereas Bloodmoon was accidentally created as a murderbot and chose to stay evil.

I really want to focus in on Eclipse and Solar real quick. A lot of these characters are antithesis of each other, but Eclipse and Solar are supposed to be the perfectly representation of “what if”. Solar’s whole existence shows that Eclipse chose the path he went on. Could he have been influenced by the kill code? Yeah, definitely. That’s totally an option. But Solar was just as corrupted by our understanding. The only reason he was able to become good was because someone stepped in. Someone treated him like a person and showed him a different way. Eclipse never had that, and ended up choosing the path of evil since that influence was never given to him.

All this to say, it is completely in character for Nexus to have chosen the path of a villain by his own volition. Moons have always been portrayed to have the ability to turn evil. It has never actually mattered what their coding is or what trauma they have been through, every Moon has had a moment where they have had to make a choice. Will they be a hero, or become the villain they were “destined” to be?

I do not think Nexus was of complete clear consciousness when making this decision. Not because of a virus or kill code, not even the dark star power he may have had a the time. It was simply his mental health. Eclipse and Solar are a perfect example of how mental health can completely change a character. Nexus’ entire life was made up of disaster after disaster, which he felt completely responsible for. When Solar died in his arms, it was his snapping point. He was standing on the edge, teetering between sanity and insanity. He felt as if his family abandoned him, on top of his already present self blame and hatred, and he fell. (It does not help that his family failed pretty spectacularly in helping him, but that is the reality of most situations like this. We as an audience were of sound mind when coming up with ways to help Nexus, but the Celestial family was not. They all had their own things to focus on, and couldn’t give Nexus the help he truly needed, despite them thinking they had. Hindsight is a bitch when it comes to scenarios such as this.)

I don’t like Nexus. The story they seem to be telling with his current character arc is the same as Bloodmoon’s, that some people just aren’t worth saving. I do not believe in this sentiment at all, and also believe Nexus could have been handled much better than he currently is. But I cannot deny that how he is acting is actually incredibly plausible. It is not out of character for him to have become what he currently is, even without outside influences. Him harvesting dark star power just happens to make his fall into insanity even more likely.

(I would like to add that none of what I just wrote was against the writers and/or actors in any way. This is a “forever” roleplay show made using VRChat on YouTube. I am in no way expecting greatness. I enjoy having Nexus and characters like EAPS Monty specifically because they play into my more out of pocket sense of humor. I would also like to reiterate that all of this is simply a theory, and how I view the characters of the show. You are completely allowed to have your own opinion! Also, if you read this whole post, thank you! Even if we don’t agree, I am grateful you put time into reading this extensive post.)

[wishful-thinking64]

Hazbin Hotel & Helluva Boss Rewrite Ideas #02

Hello! Hello! I've come to bring rewrite ideas for both shows once again! People seemed to like the first one and I like coming up with story ideas with and for practically everyone so here are seven more rewrite ideas for Hazbin Hotel & Helluva Boss! ______

#01.) Have Alastor's magic sigils be radio symbols over Vodou symbols as it not only makes way more sense with Alastor being the Radio Demon but to not play into a harmful stereotype about a real life religion.

#02.) On the topic of religion, don't be afraid to add a few more religious figures from the Bible or the Torah! As long as you're being mindful about the material you're pulling from, I really don't see this as much of an issue. People make their own spin on angels, demons, Jesus, and God all the time! But for once, this is where Viv gets cold feet even though she already has Adam & Eve there but not their two main children? Or the reason behind why their parents and everything else exists?? Seriously Viv??? #03.) In any case, if you do add the first two siblings then I suggest having Cain possibly work at the Hotel as some kind of repentance considering he's both the first real Sinner and for the fact that he feels guilt over killing his little brother. #04.) Alright, now for some ideas for Helluva Boss! I feel like we've all grown tired of seeing the, "Two people arranged in a loveless marriage," trope with how often it's been appearing and HB is no stranger to this trope and tries to use it as a way to rectify Stolas' affair with Blitzo.

I mentioned this in my third One Hell of an Unpopular Opinion series but if you want to stick loosely to HB's canon then you'd probably be better off with making Stella a surrogate mother as we still haven't seen her interact with Octavia and there was no real point in having Stolas marry Stella if all he needed to do was secure an heir. Besides I'm pretty sure that's what Paimon did in order to get Stolas as we see no signs that he had a mom growing up with how he was raised by a butler. On the contrary, should you wish to keep Stella as Stolas' wife, I'd recommend going the path not taken. By which I mean, have Stella and Stolas marry because, at one point, they did genuinely love each other but over the years that love dwindled and eventually faded out. Even though they'd be better off parting ways they choose to stay together as Great Horned Owls (the owl that the actual Stolas from the actual Ars Goetia seems to be based off of) and Snow Geese (I refuse to believe she's a swan especially since her brother has ice powers and lives in an ice castle) typically mate for life. From here, I'd have Octavia not be born out of the "necessity" of an heir but rather as a last ditch effort to see if their relationship can be rekindled as many couples in real life think that having a child or children will "fix" their relationship. #05.) Sorry for getting somewhat depressing with that last bit. To make up for it, write a fun chapter about I.M.P. having fun by rewriting Episode #05 of Season #01, The Harvest Moon Festival! A lot of people like The Harvest Moon Festival as it is though the majority agrees that it should've been a Millie centric episode. So have her be the reason they go to the Harvest Moon Festival over Stolas, show her competing in the Pain Games, and have her stand up for her husband due to having enough of her family constantly shit talking him. Overall, have Millie excel at being the bad ass girlboss that HB makes her out to be! #06.) Give Octavia some type of found family or friend group. Have her attend a prestigious private school (I doubt Stella will have her daughter attend a regular public high school) and have her become friends with the school's outcasts. The reason this group could be outcasts is because they actually earned their right to be there by getting good grades while most of the students are probably the offspring of Hell's high ranking officials. But seriously, this girl needs (and deserves) a support system STAT! #07.) Properly explain what it takes to get a soul into Heaven. I don't care if you explain this via The Ten Commandments, trusting that Jesus died for humanity's sins, or by using another set of rules from a different religion that isn't Christianity just be certain that your explanation is clear and concise and makes sense for what you have already pre-established for your rewrite. Don't do what the HH series did by saying, "Yeah, we don't know," because that is genuinely how you lose an audience. You can't have the ENTIRE premise of the show being about wanting Sinners to get into Heaven when HEAVEN doesn't even know what gets a soul there in the first place! ______ Well, those are all of the ideas I've got for now! See ya guys!

[wexhappyxfew]

in this light

(a/n): AHHHH HI, HELLO, AND SURPRISE!!!!! me managing to get a piece of writing out during the WEEK?!?!!? during the SCHOOL? WEEK? who am i. i don't know. but here we are. and i promise.....to my annie x brady girlies....PLEASE ENJOY. this has been a long time coming and something i've been carving and building out for months at this point. and i am so incredibly proud to have gotten to this point. so please, truly, enjoy! <333333

Annie Bradshaw was convinced that the greatest emotion a Bradshaw was capable of both withholding and expressing was guilt.

Guilt for a life that would never be lived.

Guilt for leaving the one you had put your roots down on across an ocean.

Guilt for the people who would never see that same person they saw shutting the door that day she had left.

The guilt she felt now, her family's letter curled into a ball in her pocket as she stared up at the moon shining through the sliver of window glass at the top of the bunkhouse doors.

Guilt made her feel that she had left her family behind for the sheer fact that she thought she could do something better in this world than harvest crops and take care of the chickens and the eggs they laid.

Guilt made her feel that flying in a plane that no longer had its original commanding pilot was something that was nearly scornful - something to regret.

Guilt made her feel that everything that had led up to now was her fault - the reason they were all trapped here, stuck here, frozen in time - even if it weren't.

To feel too much hurt.

"Psst." Annie craned her head over her shoulder and found a darkened figured approaching out of the darkness of the dimly lit hallway of the bunkhouse, "That you, Annie?"

Leave it to John Brady to find her in the midst of the night, even if it meant crawling out of the warmth of his bunk to try and seek her out. There was nothing more in this world that was beyond the presence of John Brady in her life. Despite the lives they now lived day to day in this camp, he had made it infinitely more tolerable in every way imaginable.

"It's me." Annie said quietly, watching the moonlight slowly pour upon his face and his beautiful eyes that settled onto her once he had stepped into the brighter light.

The smile on his face was enough for her to offer a small one back and it was only a matter of a second before he was evaluating her there. He always seemed to know right from wrong and in that instance, that something was bothering her.

"You okay?" he asked her, stepping forward and almost instantaneously wrapping an arm around her shoulder, "You looked….distracted earlier. I hope you don't mind that I followed you out here." Annie smiled slightly and bashfully glanced up at him, his warm arm around her shoulders hugging her into his comfortable side, stabilizing her there against his large form, his hand slowly rubbing up and down the length of her arm.

A person in her life had never been so stable, so firm, so present - so willing to be there even if the worst of circumstances.

Even with where they were now.

John Brady had been the ever-present person he was - the constant.

"Not if it's you." Annie said quietly with a nod and she watched his smile grow fonder, the corners of his eyes crinkling in a soft way that would be indescribable by morning.

In the moment, she could see it all now, but when she would wake, she'd be watching him from across the room, fighting to remember the feel of his arm around her, his eyes on her. It wasn't until moments where they were side by side did she truly let her heart feel the way it did about him - he let her lead, he let her stand on her own, be the command pilot she was and still is.

But he would hold her in the middle of the night, kissing her forehead, letting her nestle away into the crook of the warmth of his neck, praying to disappear into the presence that was himself.

He'd whisper the sweetest remarks, the softest words that made her smile and laugh. He was more than just a friend, but in anyway possible, she didn't know how to get past that feeling - of knowing there was more, but that death was always a willing option to follow. Annie wanted to protect every bit there was of the John Brady that was stood beside her right now in anyway she could.

Whenever she loved too much, she always fell to that - how could she protect a person so lovely from who she really was?

How could she protect them from the world?

But Annie knew it was fruitless. The world would march on around them, she'd peel back her layers and show who she was - and the world would still spin. How would she make it stop for those few seconds to truly show who she was to him? What he meant to her?

"I see your back at it with the moon, huh?" he asked her quietly, his grip around her shoulders tightening a bit and she leaned into his side more, cheek pressed up against the colder, outer exterior of his coat, molding herself into the side of him. Her eyes drew themselves to the moon again.

"Yeah." she said quietly, "First clear night in weeks. Figured I would go applaud the sky for that one." Brady managed a small chuckle and she could sense that he was glancing down at her again.

"You doing okay?" he asked. She took a moment to collect herself before pulling her head from his side and looking upwards at him warily.

"Fine…for the most part." she said with a convincing nod, offering him a smile again as she looked at him.

"How about yourself?" she asked, reaching forward to brush his longer strands of loose hair from his forehead and out of his eyes, "You look tired." And she knew it. She could see the exhaustion displayed on his face that he was hurriedly trying to cover up with those smiles and tender looks.

John Brady was someone that knew her far too well - and who she knew far too well, too. His presence didn't go unnoticed, his fight, his want to stay alive just like the rest of them. But that wearing on him stayed just as ever-present as anything else in this life.

"Nah," Brady said softly, as she continued to softly run her fingers back through hair, "not too tired. I think I'll always be tired."

"John…." Annie said quietly watching as he quirked out a smile at her, "I'm serious."

"Even if I'm tired, I wanted to make sure you were alright," Brady said quietly, before smirking, "especially if it means it's just you and me right now." Annie looked up at him, her cheeks warming the slightest bit. The whisper of his voice tickling her ears and her skin, that soft look in his eyes enough to make her knees shakes.

"Well, you got me." Annie said, rather boldly looking up at him, attempting to maintain what composure was left in her as he watched her. If there was anything, she'd never feel guilty about the way John Brady looked at her and treated her. She felt like the only person in the room sometimes when she'd catch his gaze.

"That I do." Annie's cheek heated more.

"Can I ask you something?" she asked him quietly, her hand stopping in his hair a bit, her eyes wandering towards his, her free hand itching to grab his own.

"Ask away, Bradshaw." he said, tilting his head to the side, those stubborn strands of hair hanging in his eyes again, to which Annie reached forward to brush back again.

"If I'm mistaken, one night, you….Mr. John Brady, whispered something that's been in my mind for a bit too long." she said quietly, watching as his smirk grew, the moonlight making his face and eyes glow even in the darkness. Her palms grew sweaty as she retreated her hands and crossed her arms in front of her, the large presence of Brady in front of her seeming to swallow her whole.

"What was that?" he asked her, voice lower this time as his eyes roamed her face, before settling on her lips - this time, lingering longer than was needed - before traveling back up to her eyes.

"Well," Annie said clearing her throat, fighting the smile on her face, "if you could focus your gaze on my eyes, maybe I'd tell you, okay?"

"Yes, ma'am." Annie was damn-near sure every emotion was about to burst at the moment, but she managed to hold it together in front of him - how she even did that was a miracle in it of itself. Annie took a step closer, looking up towards him, her eyes staring deeply up into his and smiled slightly.

"Someone wanted me back at Thorpe Abbotts, in nothing but his A2 jacket. All by ourselves." she whispered quietly. And watching the recognition in his eyes had to be her favorite part of standing there, inches from his face, the tiny realization clicking across his face until the tops of his own cheeks were dusted red.

"Didn't know you felt that way about me, John Brady." she said quietly, watching him swallow nervously - seeing him suddenly almost out-of-place made her heart wobble. There it was again - that want to shield him from the world, protect him, keep him at the peace in which they'd manage to maintain in a place like this.

God, what was he doing to her?

"Didn't think you'd hear that." he managed out, but she could tell he was just trying to get words out of his mouth. She'd managed to stun him it seemed in anyway that was possible to stun John Brady. And in this light, where it was just the two of them, inches from each other, where it almost felt like they were the most vulnerable that they'd been, she managed a small smile.

"I'm only teasing you." Annie managed out, her nerves getting the best of her as she watched his face continue to flush crimson - even if the moonlit darkness, her own cheeks were nearly hot to the touch and his presence there across those inches between them was enough to warm her entire body up.

"I thought you'd been asleep. When I'd said that." he managed out again and Annie couldn't help but nervously look away from his gaze and towards his lips there in front of her before trailing her eyes upwards again.

"Oh." she said quietly, unsure of what words to conjure up next that would make sense. He thought she was asleep - but he'd still said it. He'd still said those words and she'd been thinking about it ever since.

"Did you mean it?" she asked him, holding her gaze on his. How she hadn't turned away yet, she'd never know.

"Every word of it." Brady said, his voice filled with nerves, but equally confident that he'd meant it. That'd he meant every word he'd ever said to her since he'd helped her up into the back of Bucky Egan's jeep.

For a moment, as his words rang in her ears, she stood there staring up at him.

Every word of it. Every word of it. Every word of it.

She would never feel guilty about what she did next.

Slowly, she reached forward, placing her hands on his broad, built shoulders, before letting them travel up his neck towards his cheek bones, which felt like they were practically on fire. God what was she even doing?

She let herself step forward, right up against his body, tilting her head upwards as Brady slowly looked down towards her, those inches between them suffocating as she stared into his persistent gaze. He seemed frozen there in front of her - almost like he couldn't believe what was happening, though neither could she.

"Annie…." Brady whispered, his voice tight, like it was caught in his throat, fighting for a way out. She watched him, looking up through he lashes towards his beautiful face that had never looked more safe, warm and protected right where they were. He had never looked more like himself than in this moment.

"You can touch me." she whispered - the boldness was more than a surprise to her it felt, from both of them, as he reached forward, wrapping his arms rightly around her waist, underneath her jacket, large hands splayed across her back as they each seemed to breathe in shaky breaths of air, mixed between them.

His eyes had never been more locked onto hers as she slowly moved her left hand from his cheek up into his hair, watching as his eyes flickered and he swallowed, maintaining what composure the two of them had left.

The stillness around them almost made her retreat all the sudden - them, the two of them - stood in the hallway of the bunkhouse in the middle of the night, the strobes of the moon shining right into the bunkhouse as best as they could, onto the two of them, wrapped in each other's arms.

But the second she came to focus on his eyes again, those eyes, she was gone.

And for a moment, her eyes fluttered close and she envisioned the touch of his hands on her back, what it meant to just be held so close to him, after everything he'd done for her and with her. Holding onto her like his life depended on it. Her hand up into his hair, her other on his cheek - enough for when a small noise escaped his lips, did she shut her eyes fully for a moment.

Life had always been about Annie Bradshaw getting close to everything she had wanted, but having it ripped away from her in a matter of seconds.

Right before all the good things would happen.

Right before things would finally change.

Everything was always gone in seconds, even if it had taken years to get where she had gotten.

But now?

Stood with John Brady inches from her face, she had everything she had ever wanted. Right. Here. Right in front of her.

"John-"

Before she could even finish his name, her entire body became pressed to the front of himself and his lips had pressed right onto her own, a small gasp at the back of her throat dying at his touch. And soon his hands were exploring the length of her back, her own touch feeling its way up into his hair, the small groans from his lips making her a little crazy on the inside. Everything about John Brady made her feel a little crazy though - how he looked at her, treated her, talked about her….touched her. With intent and purpose and meaning.

Everything meant something when it came to the two of them.

Even when they had only thought it to be nothing more than friendship. It had always meant something more. They stumbled a bit of feet and toes as her back pressed against the wooden wall beside the door, his kisses intoxicating and dizzying in more ways than one.

And John Brady?

He knew how to kiss.

For all his mannerisms and politeness and gentlemanly way of affairs - she had never been kissed like the way John Brady kissed. His hands had made their way to her neck, the large palms pressed against the hot skin of her cheeks, fingers dancing towards her jawline and hair, his lips persistent and deepening.

There was something natural about being pressed up against the wall, John Brady kissing her, her mind spinning in circles as his tongue pressed against her bottom lip.

And before she knew it, they pulled away for a brief moment, gasping for short bits of air between them - along with the sudden realization that she was sweating all over.

Annie met Brady's gaze and found him already watching her, with one of the most dazed looks she'd ever seen on the man. She didn't have words for what it meant to be standing there like this in front of him, watching his gaze linger on hers longer and longer. There were no words to describe this feeling - she could only let herself feel what feeling this actually was. Love.

"I should've asked to kiss you, but I couldn't-"

"John." Annie whispered quietly, cutting him off as she inhaled a deep breath, "You didn't have to ask." He watched her and slowly nodded. Then he smiled.

"I mean every word I said," he whispered with a small grin, "so…..may I kiss you? Again?" Annie looked up at him, grinning like he was almost innocent and let out a small laugh, her cheeks warm, his own cheeks red, their eyes glowing, bodies inches from one another there in the darkness.

"Please do." Annie whispered, and the small laugh that left Brady's lips, that smirk on his face, made her lose her mind as he pressed his lips deeply and slowly, enough to make her eyes shut.

Brady moaning into her mouth did something to her insides as she pressed herself closer to his body, her hands traveling into that lush hair of his that her fingertips had been begging to touch for days by this point after that look across the bunk room, that longing look, the way his eyes had turned nearly insane as he had watched her, the urge to reach out and have him slam her against the wall previously overwhelming.

But now, they were here and he was kissing her, and she was kissing back with just as much urgency, the two of them falling apart in each other's embraces.

For a brief moment, they separated, their lips still inches from one another as they took in soft breaths of air, eyes shut, simply holding onto one another in the silence of the night.

Annie had almost expected to feel crazed. She had expected to feel suddenly all over the place and overwhelmed and unsure of what to do next. But with Brady, she felt the farthest from that. She'd never felt more calm and safe and protected and content than in this moment of time. With him.

Then, she heard Brady let out a small chuckle, before gently pressing his lips to hers before pulling back again. This time, she did open her eyes and look upwards towards him. She smiled. He was smiling that gorgeous grin.

"What?" Annie whispered.

"You don't know how long I've wanted to do that." Brady said quietly. Annie watched him with a quiet gaze - his words seemed to strike her somewhere deep inside her heart. To hear those words. He'd waited.

Any memory that she had seemed to share with him before this moment flashed through her mind.

She remembered all those early mornings sharing coffee with the rising sun, the soft breeze, the shared quiet gazes. Those dances at the flying club, the times he'd offer his hand and spin her on the floor and then they'd go back to those quiet glances and small smiles. All those times he'd come to find her and check on her, all those moments before missions, when death could undoubtedly become imminent. Who'd made her feel both comfortable and confident and more herself than she'd ever been. And she'd never had another person who could do such a thing to her.

Annie slowly reached forward and without any second thought, wrapped her arms around the center of his form, hands clawing up the back underneath his jacket as she snuggled her head against his chest.

All her life, all she had wanted was to be able to let her guard down around someone else without being judged, torn apart, or told off for it. Someone who wouldn't let her get lost in the darkness, who would willingly hold out their hand towards her and take it head-on with her. Someone like John Brady.

Slowly, Brady wrapped his arms around her, pressing a kiss to her head there in the silent darkness before resting his cheek atop her head. And she could sense him smiling there, just the slightest shift in his grin.

"I've waited a while, too." she whispered softly and he let out a quiet laugh to which she couldn't help but grin. Brady chuckled quietly again.

"How about you stay the night?" he whispered quietly. Annie pulled back, looking up at him with her arms still wrapped around his center and smirked.

"Almost like we're not in the middle of a P.O.W. camp." she said and watched as he smirked at her words and shook his head.

"I just want to know you're right there next to me when I go to sleep," he whispered quietly and his eyes grew serious as he watched her, "especially here." Annie managed a tender smile and reached up onto her tip-toes to kiss his lips softly.

"You got me." she whispered against his lips, before grinning and fluttering her eyes close, 'No funny business though." Brady laughed.

"No funny business?" Brady asked her quietly, his hand sliding up under her sweater to her warm skin, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"You know what I mean." Annie said quietly.

"Do I?" he whispered back and her cheeks warmed. Did she? Annie met his gaze again and watched his eyes trail across her face. Pressing forward, she put her lips to his ear and grinned.

"How about you stay the night in mine?" she whispered, before unlatching from his warmth and turning away down the creaky, dimly lit hallway. Glancing over her shoulder, she found him watching her from the moonlight, that wide grin on his face. She smirked as she disappeared into the bunk room - she was sure she could see that smile in every universe and know, more than anything - that it was him. She'd never feel guilty for loving someone like him despite the world and the war.

She'd do it all again to see that smile - to see him.