#22 years of just existing

[astrobookwormsinger]

AGENDA:

enter hellsite app with sole purpose

ignore dash/feed in case it triggers some weird stuff

immediately go to profile

click on palette button to edit profile

erase description cause it was cringe anyway

update my age to correspond as I did with every other social media profile of mine just minutes ago

post this post for whatever reason, only on this hellsite also for whatever reason

leave hellsite app, probably never to return for the next few months

X

[anna-scribbles]

they should've been at the club(infertility treatment centers)

[tricoufamily]

jacques's, nancy's, and mrs. villareal's parents circa 1960-something + baby jacques and nancy bc they were there in cas anyway why not

this feud's been going on for approximately this long

[grubloved]

its so silly but i just keep thinking abt being in norway and seeing for the first time kinda ever that like governments can do things to make peoples life better. for no other reason but just to improve things. like im sure norway has lots of problems i didnt see on a trip but i cannot stress how insane it was that the government had done things because it would be nice. to take care of people. ?????

[volivolition]

wiggles my fingers at you ouuuu… you want to tell me about solace so bad…

HKJGG wiggles my fingers back lovingly!!! i really do, i fuckin LOVE solace :3 hey did you know i really like making fake skill descriptions?

SOLACE

Follow the north star. Find light in even the darkest places. Cool for: Optimists, Recovering lost souls, Sweet summer children

Solace is the skill you tucked away long ago, at the bottom of Pandora's box. The little one that tells you: despite it all, there is still hope. It needs a lot of nurturing -- and it's far from being the most helpful for police work -- but taking care of it is basically self-care. It enables you to find the glow in yourself that you often ascribe to gold lungs or brilliant halos in others. It encourages you to wake up and watch the sunrise, to play board games with someone you love, to forgive yourself and let yourself be a gentler kind of animal. Constantly looking forward to a brighter future, it also helps shield your morale from damage.

At high levels, Solace gives you a heightened sense of childlike optimism - which isn't always the sense to lead with in this precariously harsh world. Always looking for the bright side will blindside you with naivety. At low levels, however, you may just extinguish whatever keeps your soul alight. You've already lost her once. You may not survive the desolation if you let her disappear again.

[tropicalcontinental]

So what if Andrew and Nicholas went to same college and met, what then? (Blabbering below)

My thought process was that I rewatched those FST videos and started to wonder if Nicholas just repressed the whole AI Builds thing (since Mr. Eye is telling him to wake up so like he lost control of Nicholas somehow) and yeah his mental health and experience during game development was pretty heavy for Nicholas so he just, uh, blocks it out. Again.

And I was thinking about Lethe Protocol and how that basically made Andrew forget about his old videos and partially about Chris (as a way to prevent him from going down the same path Chris did and to try and mitigate the Call of the Well.)

So uh... What if Lethe Protocol just happens post “Into the Mind?” Chris does it again because the distress this is causing Andrew doesn't seem to be worth it anymore. He changed his stance. The easier way out is better. Being persistent shouldn't lead to pain. Andrew's happy memories shouldn't be tainted with Chris' death.

But like last time, this Protocol isn't as clean as it should be (Andrew was a lot further into the Well than before.) Just like how Andrew eventually remembered and subconsciously followed the Well's call, it will happen again. Delaying the inevitable, yadda yadda.

But for the time being, Andrew forgets the channel, which actually leads to it being abandoned. RIP. Completely forgets Chris (which fucks with his memories a lot.) Wells and Minecraft in general become weird for Andrew (they bring up strange and splotchy memories that hurt) and he doesn't know why.

And Nicholas is just grappling with his dissociation issues in general. Trying to look forward when his past is so blurred and spotty. What ambition does he have if he doesn't even know who he is. Struggling with creation and trying to connect with people and so many other things. Just trying to understand how other people make living look so easy.

So yeah both of these guys meet! IDK what the hell they would do if they met (maybe make music together.) Or how they meet. Maybe Andrew is just strumming on his guitar aimlessly and Nick just so happens to be in the area. Manage to strike up a small conversation.

Maybe they talk about butterflies and wells and how they both have weird reactions to these mundane items (If they even get that candid to other people in real life.) Then Nicholas asks Andrew to play Wonderwall.

[mymarifae]

hsr age estimates... i was just sorting out my thoughts since same face has everyone except the Kiddos looking like they're 20 when that's definitely not true for a good chunk of them + ages are EXTRA poorly defined due to not all the characters being human and having different life spans. so for those guys these numbers are like. vague equivalences. also using the 20s as an example "early" would be anything from 20 to 25 and "late" is 26 to 30

[knight-engale]

So I went to an amusement park today right. It was a whole disaster but that's a different story. Anyway I get home and I'm (trying to) talk to my mother about my day and she says

"You're a lot braver than I was at your age, I never would've done that" (as in gone out all day 30+ miles away from home)

And I'm sitting there thinking about how when she was my age she'd been married for two years and had a baby (me)

Idk there's not really a point to this story I'm just...thinking a lot I guess. How much different my life is from hers at the same age

[orcelito]

Part of me is like 'I've been a student for so long, how am I gonna handle being Not A Student..!??!' In terms of like. Self perception, I guess.

I think my psyche is already raring for it tho. Here I am daydreaming looking at house listings and writing a damned baby au bc my brain has decided I kinda want one of those, too.

I'll still always be a mega nerd. But fuck dude. I guess I'm an adult, too.

[blujayonthewing]

it's kind of weird to think about dnd modern AUs with the gnomes specifically, because they're all ~young adults, physically and developmentally around my age or a little younger, and in a dnd setting that's the strongest angle I have to work with for roleplaying them, but also if my vague idea of a modern au takes place [handwaves] now, more or less, then felix and mel would have both been kids in the 60s and 70s and have a bunch of cultural life experiences I cannot relate to at all

[lefthandoverfoot]

idk vent post

cw homeschooling trauma and general emotional abuse

[fishyartist]

Wanting 2 make a scope creep nightmare of a visual novel vs my inability to focus on jack shit ever in my life.

[designernishiki]

I wanna flesh out a yakuza oc but every time I think about it I end up thinking about an oc of mine who already Exists who’s not a yakuza oc. but is, in fact, an oc who is a yakuza. and that fact is genuinely completely unrelated

[beheadable]

Everytime I think I’m normal about Brake I see him again and it’s like nope. Still insane

[livvyofthelake]

i’m allowed to be a jakey hater ok my best friend has a jakey ass boyfriend who doesn’t like me very much. i’ve earned it

[jonathanbyersphd]

I am a Jonathan & Nancy barely finish college before getting married truther and I hate myself for it a lil bit tbh