#*neuroticisms

[writhe]

i want to be more open to anything and everything and i’m scared

[nonbinary-vents]

Being a creative with adhd is so weird because you want to make things so badly but your brain is just refusing to, so you’re just stuck there replaying the exact scene or piece of dialogue or drawing or cinematic shot in your mind while not actually being able to do anything. But at the same time the adhd is actively giving you unique creative experiences and ideas and it feels like a fundamental part of you as an artist. It’s such an interesting dichotomy of feeling the thing that you want to make so strongly and wanting nothing more than to just pour it all out but also being completely unable to do it, and that coming from the same source. But then also you have to live through said dichotomy and it just becomes completely and overwhelmingly exhausting.

[twinsfawn]

relevant lmao

[canisalbus]

hello! i've written a short little machete fic, and i wanted to share it with you as thanks for all the incredible art and generous question-answering you've been doing these last few months. i hope that if you give it a look, you enjoy it. <3 keep up all your amazing work! archiveofourown [.] org / works / 50945128

✦ A Voi ✦

[jellogram]

I'm so glad that Ryan "bought and returned 9 pillows before he found a satisfactory one" Bergara and Shane "regularly orders 100 count boxes of original flavor Burt's Bees" Madej found each other

[conceptofjoy]

gonna do a OCEAN personality scale thing for the alpha kids when i get home it would be funny

[ducktracy]

compilation of my villagers bullying me. this will be a growing collection. these are all from today alone.

[otlwoozi]

seventeen 짝짝 follow follow!!

[possamble]

I know we don't get much of Marcille's pov in "A little creature who loves you" but what we've been able to glean from her expression of anger at Falin in the fifth chapter and the (surprisingly but extremely welcome as it made the smut hit the spot even more) deep dive into what feeds Marcille's behaviour in "The Dragoness of Melini", you've written Marcille's self-centeredness and narcissism in an extremely poignant way. You really get the feeling that she *does* want to do good and make the world better but overcorrects by trying to control those around her, which people like Namari interpret as purely wrong. I'm a trans girl with NPD (same as the anon recommending Bellwether's zine) and I fucking love what you're doing with Marcille on that front (and many other fronts).

THANK YOU for understanding what I'm trying to do with Marcille fjsjkdkf so many people try to reduce her to her control issues or file them off altogether but. I just. Even when people are able to acknowledge her multitudes I've always wanted to take it a step further where her wish to do good and be good isn't opposed to her fussy neurotic narcissism, but but enmeshed together as one core and unique part of her personality. She loves being deferred to and respected as an authority because it makes her feel important AND because it enables her to help and be useful to other people. Her desire to help people is fueled by a desire to feel important and respected and her desire to feel powerful and important is motivated by her desire to help people and it's not a black and white good or bad thing that can be separated.

Sorry this is jdkdkf turning into another Marcille rant but. My blorbo. I wish more people could see how, despite a lot of emotional hypocrisy in interpersonal relationships (via her inability to understand other perspectives), she holds herself to the same high standards she imposes on others. She is a control freak about herself first and foremost. You never see her more despondent than the times she has failed to meet her own expectations, and furthermore, caused trouble for other people because of it.

In some ways, she's a pathetic little wet cat with the backbone of a drippy eclair. In others, she's a fucking iron fist that will not tolerate failure or weakness in herself. Sometimes she gets a little too smug and peacocks around in her own accomplishments while fishing for more praise. Others, she thinks that doing an insane amount of work in service of other people is the bare fucking minimum that she expects no praise for while berating herself when she can't meet her own requirements. She has the pathetic ridiculousness of a constantly-distressed diva and the fiery dignity of a dragon AND the vulnerability of a terribly lonely girl and just.

She's terrible and projects her own expectations on other people far too often. She's wonderful and at heart just wants to help people. She's neither and just wants to feel a little less lost and a little more loved in a very big world. She's horrid AND fully capable of growing past it in ways not everyone acknowledges so I'm just happy my vision for her resonates with other people djsjdjf

[wanderingmind867]

Whenever my posts don't seem to get attention, my mood gets sour and depressive. I don't think that indicates emotional stability on my part, but I can't really help it. I think this is proof that social media isn't great for me, honestly. I seem to feel some sort of obsessive dejection when I realize that my posts aren't getting attention. I probably should talk to my dad and therapist about this, but that would require me to admit to having that account (and more specifically, to having made 13,000+ posts and never telling anyone). But until i work up the courage to tell someone about all this (and who knows if i ever even will), I'm just going to do what I usually do. I'm going to ask: did anyone seen my posts? Because it feels like some of them have had next to no attention, and i'm beginning to want to repost them.

[mysticcoffeecat]

I thought it would be fun to start a series of character analyses using different personality typing frameworks and South Park characters. Obviously, before I share my first, a disclaimer: SP isn’t gospel truth for psychological analysis, and characters can obviously be analyzed in different ways. My views on them also aren’t the gospel truth lol. Also, personality typing is in no way a real science. This is all just for fun.

Anyways, with all that aside…. My first topic is regarding the Big Five’s concept of Neuroticism. 

Both these kids clock in around 60-65% Neurotic (and honestly, they'd probably score even higher if they weren't literal children. That said, either of their neuroticism can go down with age). 

But holy shit the way Stan and Kyle express it couldn’t be more different.

Kyle’s neuroticism comes with a side of ‘fuck you, I’m right.’

He’s often the morality police, screaming at Cartman every five minutes (which is valid tbh). His triggers are injustice, idiocy, and anything that violates his moral code. This results in intense emotional outbursts that are often angry. Some things to note about Kyle’s neuroticism:

His anxiety and reactivity are highly situational. When something crosses his moral line (or… uh… someone), it’s go-time. He becomes righteous and indignant, and he is extremely non-confrontational and not afraid to get in arguments, both physical or verbal.

That said, when the stakes aren’t high, Kyle can be pretty chill and logical. He’s not neurotic all the time - just when his morals get challenged, making him fight for what he believes is the greater good.

Stan’s neuroticism is a lot more… emo/goth compared to Kyle’s fiery moral crusading.

It’s quieter, more existential, and more depressing than anxious. He’s not here to argue with you; he’s here to silently judge you while he descends into a more innerly nihilistic worldview. 

His emotional struggles are more constant than Kyle’s more reactive form. His neuroticism is much more quiet, but also more pervasive and brooding. Unlike Kyle, he doesn’t often explode - he implodes. His negativity simmers under the surface, manifesting as cynicism, withdrawal, nonchalance, and overall seeing everything as shit. 

When triggered, unless it’s for something he can still find the energy to raise passion for like animals, Stan doesn’t fight the world like Kyle does. He gives it the middle finger and checks out entirely (and can be quite sensitive and angsty while doing so). 

TL;DR: 

Kyle’s Neuroticism is visible, righteous, and fiery as fuck, leading to loud moral crusades and heated arguments. He’s someone who will yell at you for going against his morals, but also help you with your homework because he cares. His neuroticism is like a weapon he points outward (often at Cartman). And while many may view Kyle on the surface-level as being more stereotypically ‘neurotic’ than Stan, when he’s not actively fighting moral battles, he can actually keep his shit together pretty well. 

Stan’s neuroticism is brooding, depressing, and angsty. It’s like a black hole inside him that occasionally swallows his will to live.  He's less explosive but more consistently done with this shit. While Kyle's fighting the good fight, Stan is wondering if any fight even fucking matters at all.

Neither of them has a more ‘correct’ approach - they’re just different. Anyways, interested to hear other’s takes, especially on what you think other SP character’s Neuroticism percentages may be and how they add to Stan and Kyle’s!

[dust-tastic-1983]

Not really cannon to turbos character but i like to think it is

I might draw this if the winter blues stops kicking my ass

[lesbianalanwake]

LOL but I won't stand for Alan slander. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Director candidacy is about being able to withstand intense paranatural exposure without shattering on impact. there's a vacuum after Northmoor is contained because everyone sees what it does to him and doesn't want to touch that gun. Trench takes it upon himself and does well with shouldering the paranatural side of it (until the Hiss wears him down), but that's why he's so worried about finding a successor.

Alan has withstood thirteen years of paranatural torment and living darkness actively trying to eat him from the inside out. he's figured out how to make the paranatural forces around him play by his rules, and he's continually adapted those on the fly. he could pick up that gun just fine.

it's the mundane management side of things that would make him go absolutely nutso bonkers. resource management? people handling? spreadsheets? his neurotic ass would crumble within a week

[dykemind]

Violent males are never responsible for their behavior. Women are responsible for violent males' behavior whenever possible. Males hurting others, being obsessed with hurting others and gleefully becoming subhuman trash is not their fault... they're just lonely... underneath it all is a real, human person... a beating heart! a living soul that just needs love! If you only recognize their true inner goodness steven universe style they'll part with their cruel ways! Meanwhile a woman who returns her starbucks order or panics and fights back while being arrested is a dumb karen bitch who needs to be taught a lesson.

[soulmaking]

Marcel Proust, In Search of Lost Time (trans. C. K. Scott Moncrieff)

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

finished turn A gundam and sad about it. Because it was good and i didnt want it to end. Crazy how Lily Borjano ended up being the best character ? I decided i'm going to lean even more into that side of my personality now (Fearless, Self-Assured, Unmoveably Optimistic But in a subtle & dignified manner)