#*clearly coping badly*

[sagie-artzz]

They're real to me, dammit. 😤😤😤

[hyperbali]

Straight up tripped into (Inquisitor!)Jeanne/Solas and saw into eternity.

It's like. One of the most hilariously fitting ships she has ever had.

Shit boy I die!!

[atopvisenyashill]

jon/ygritte is very interesting bc even tho their situation was pretty fucked up jon did love her! gendrya is cute but arya is too young and the books are never being finished so yeah

yeah those are both very fair. i think if we got the finished books, gendrya would be in that category of “genuine good love story” bc right now it’s like the beginning and middle build up but, especially from gendry’s end, no real climax. i don’t think arya is aware she has romantic feelings for gendry, i’ve said before i think he’s aware of her feelings and just didn’t know how to handle it, and now feels some extreme guilt over ~rejecting~ her unknown crush. and i think that’s very typical sort of romance novel misunderstanding that could come to a very lovely conclusion. but right now arya is still an eleven year old completely unaware of the romantic undertones of that entire thing while gendry is (i always forget his age is he 15??) just like, trying not to die in the riverlands while he stews in his guilt lol.

jonygritte meanwhile is VERY much one of those toxic romances but i think people are really silly about it. there’s significantly more romanticism in this relationship than other ones, and i think it’s silly to ignore that aspect for the hardline anti ygritte takes the same as like, ignoring those toxic elements really takes away how interesting this relationship is. on the one hand, there’s very much a reason that this romance serves a similar narrative purpose as like, dany/drogo, tyrion/tysha and tyrion/shae, sansa/sandor, etc, and it’s bc there’s some FREAKY consent issues going on here lmao but on the other hand….jon’s feelings for ygritte have impacted not just his own feelings on romance but also his entire leadership arc re: gender & culture it’s so stupid to pretend like she’s ONLY there as a negative influence (this is how i feel about sandor too).

[marcvscicero]

never felt more like exiting this world lol tws for everything in tags

[mithrun-house-of-kerensil]

I think about Lycion and his relationship with beauty soo much

Looking at him, we can see that he easily meets the elven beauty standards. He has long silver hair, clear skin, and androgynous form: he's the picture of a youthful, pretty man.

And yet.

He experiences such a visceral reaction to his own body. Despite looking like your stereotypical pretty boy, he doesn't fulfill the expectation of being vain in the slightest (at least not in this form).

In fact, we see in the extras just how badly his body dysmorphia got to him. This was not a passive discomfort or a shallow desire. Lycion was trying to destroy his body. He hated living in his skin so much he was actively self harming in multiple ways in an effort to punish himself.

It's not until he uses ancient magic to get his beast form that his perspective of himself changes. The magic required him to be heavily tattooed over his whole body and we can clearly we can see that he wears these marks with pride. But that's not where any of this ends for him because despite having the solution to his problem, Lycion can't be a wolf all the time.

This means that he has to learn to cope with existing as an elf still, and what stands out to me is how Lycion's hair is almost always in his face. Even now, in the body he likes more, he hides. Whether this is a lingering discomfort or just a habit, there's no saying, but it makes me sad.

Especially in this panel, where it's clear that a lot of his hair had been pulled forward to cover his face rather just the few strands. His expression looks so hollow. He looks tired and uncomfortable. This isn't the casual playfulness he usually has. I think this is a peek into the idea that it's very self soothing for him to use his hair as a shield when he's forced to stay in his human body for too long.

I think that his hair is so important to him because we can see that it's the only trait that carried over into his wolf form. This means that when he's forced to be human he can cling to the single part of him that's shared between his current body and his preferred one.

In summary: I love him so much

[phagodyke]

why does being at my parents make me feel so physically ill. theyre not even HERE.

[muletia]

[tfp] obsessed!optimus prime x human!reader

summary: you had to go on a business trip. optimus doesn't take it too well

cw: obsessed!optimus, hardcore pinning, angst, i wanted to practice writing dialogues and it shows lmao

word count: 1800

an: i want you guys to know that i am reading EVERY reblog and comment from you swirling my hair and kicking my legs like a schoolgirl

you are so real for that anon

When you, out of your own free will, expressed the desire to join him on patrol, Optimus was overjoyed. You rarely got the chance to be together, just the two of you, always consumed by work or saving the world. And although Optimus wouldn’t dare ask you outright to accompany him on patrols (because the last thing he wanted was to make you feel uncomfortable), he deeply longed to spend more time with you alone. He knew he was feeding only his own illusions, fueling the machinery of madness, but by this point, he couldn’t stop. Not when you sat comfortably on his seat, gazing at the views outside the window, visibly content with your outing together.

He wanted so badly for this to be your everyday reality. Maybe then he could finally find some relief from his fixation, maybe you would even save him.

"Hey," you started, and his entire attention focused on you. "Actually, I’ve been meaning to tell you this for a while."

Oh.

Did your feelings match his? Did you feel affection for him as well? Had you noticed his suffering? Or maybe you wanted to reject him, once and for all, to make him understand that his passion was an illusion, that no matter how much he wanted it, the two of you could never be together — too incompatible, too different. That he had developed this coping mechanism, exhausted by the war.

But before Optimus could spiral further, you crushed his hopes.

"The company I work for is sending me on a business trip," you sighed, clearly dissatisfied with the news. "It’s supposed to take two weeks, but you never really know with these trips, especially since they’re sending me across the continent."

"I understand," he replied, his tone not betraying the turmoil within. "What does this business trip involve?"

"Oh, shoot, sorry! I should have explained that right away," you laughed casually as if you hadn’t just delivered news that shattered his spark. "Business trip is assigned by an employer for training sessions, conferences, exhibitions, and other boring stuff. Kind of like a mission, but without explosions, action, or danger."

It was good to hear that you’d be safe, though you would truly be safest only at the base, under his watchful optics.

Pessimistic, ugly thoughts churned in his processor. Of all the things he expected to hear from you, this wasn’t one of them. Suddenly, he feared being alone, feared his own dreams. Because he knew you wouldn’t be there to comfort him after a nightmare, and nothing else could bring him peace.

"I am sorry to hear we will not see each other for two weeks," he said, "but I am confident you will do exceptionally well on this assignment. You are dependable, unyielding. You can handle anything."

"Oh, thank you," you answered, a bit flustered. You hadn’t expected a compliment. "It just makes me sad to leave Jasper. I don’t say it often enough, but I have a wonderful time with all of you. With you."

"Likewise, [Name]. When are you leaving?"

"The day after tomorrow. Tomorrow after work, I’ll say goodbye to everyone else."

So soon. Too soon. He’d hoped you wouldn’t leave until next week, to at least give him time to mentally prepare for the separation, but you denied him that luxury. Not that any amount of time would have prepared him for this.

Slowly, subtly enough that you wouldn’t notice the change, he reduced his speed, prolonging your shared drive.

"I’m not sure I’ll have time to write," you warned. "Unfortunately, they’ve given me a really tight schedule. But! If I can, I’ll write to the kids. Oh, and expect some souvenirs — I’ll bring something back for you all."

"You do not need to spend your valuable time searching for trinkets. But if you insist, I will cherish anything you bring me."

"Aw, don’t worry—it’ll be no trouble." You waved your hand dismissively. "You do so much for me, for the kids, for the whole Earth without asking for anything in return. You deserve something nice."

"I do not protect your planet for glory or offerings."

"I know, I know. That’s very noble. And amazing. So many years, sticking firmly to your values."

He eagerly soaked up your praise, allowing himself, if only for a brief moment, to forget the world around him, to forget his duties, unfulfilled promises, fallen brothers and sisters. He’d never describe himself as 'amazing', nor did he believe the praise his own kind gave him about his greatness. But for you, he could believe it. If only for a moment, a few seconds, so that you’d leave on your mission thinking warmly of your time together and of him.

"Thank you, [Name]. Please know that I value your words tremendously."

"Oh," you blushed, "that’s nice to hear."

Embarrassed, you quickly changed the subject, unaware that Optimus was watching you closely, curious about your reaction. For now, he pushed thoughts of your departure to the back of his processor, wanting to fully enjoy your presence. You recommended songs from the country genre, one of his favorite discoveries on Earth, which he promised to listen to later. He knew well that this would lead to more daydreaming, imagining a future that would never be. Because no matter how hard he tried, his tomorrow would not be entwined with yours. His desires would forever remain mere fantasies born out of desperation, longing, and sorrow.

A week had passed since you left. In the lives of the Autobots, not much had changed because of your absence; they went on with their chaotic schedule. The kids, however, missed you. No more evenings spent helping them with their homework, working on your reports, playing games, or simply chatting. The worst part was that no one really knew what was going on with you. You rarely messaged, didn’t have time to talk, and when you did, it was just to say, "I’m alive, it’s boring, I’ll message you on Thursday." Life continued, despite how much Miko wished she could play games with you instead of doing her homework.

Everyone managed to adapt to your absence.

With one exception.

At first glance, it seemed like Optimus, the bot with whom you shared the closest bond, hadn’t been affected by such a drastic change. Nothing in his behavior indicated any longing. He didn’t express his opinion on the matter, didn’t ask, didn’t demand. As always, he buried his feelings deep within, playing the role of a diligent leader, hiding from everyone the nightmares running through his processor, now even more intense because of your absence.

He was withering, quietly and alone.

Until now, he had been content simply watching you. He had established a routine, unhealthy as it was, that kept him going. He knew that most of the time when he returned from patrol or a mission, you would be at the base. Even if you came every other or every third day, Optimus knew that eventually, you would show up. It gave him a sense of stability amidst the chaos surrounding him. But now? Maybe two weeks wasn’t a big challenge for you, but he was done after one.

Now, he wanted to be more than a passive observer. He craved physical contact, to hold you close, to feel your heartbeat against his metal. He wanted to know you were alive, to feel your pulse under his digit, to listen to its rhythm, to understand how your chest moved against his metal. He wanted to feel, taste, touch, enter.

He kept glancing at the spot on the couch where you usually sat with your laptop on your lap or spent time with the kids as if hoping that if he looked just one more time, you would materialize there. That everything would return to normal, that he wouldn’t suffer so much, that you would give him the daily dose of antidote he needed to function without plunging deeper into despair. But no matter how many times he looked, you weren’t there, and wouldn’t be for another week.

At some point, however, someone noticed their leader’s miserable mood.

"I can’t quite figure out what kind of bond you have with that woman," Ratchet said, pausing his work to look at Optimus. Before his friend could answer, he continued, "But she’ll be back soon. And whatever she’s doing, she’ll do it well. She’s tough."

"Thank you, old friend. I have no doubt in her abilities. But I would feel better if she were stationed closer to the base in case of a Decepticon attack."

"Mm-hmm," the medic scoffed. "Sure, that’s all it’s about."

Optimus had no response to that. He wasn’t surprised that Ratchet noticed his infatuation, but he would prefer that his friend not delve into the details of their relationship. At least, not yet. Not while Optimus himself was a wreck.

"Hey, hey! [Name] messaged!" Miko yelled.

The Autobot leader immediately approached the platform, finally abandoning his conversation with Ratchet, aware that it would only spark more suspicions. But he didn’t care anymore, not in such an important moment.

He stood directly behind Miko, with Bumblebee and Bulkhead beside him, equally curious to know what you had been up to over the past week.

"She sent photos, too! Look!"

Miko turned to show the messages to the others but paused when she noticed Optimus’s helm close to her.

“Whoa,” she whispered, surprised that out of all the bots, he was the one standing the closest. She swallowed, but her confidence quickly returned.

Holding her phone firmly, she displayed a close-up selfie of you. You were smiling, though the bags under your eyes betrayed that you were sleep-deprived, probably exhausted.

Optimus felt the accumulated stress, pain, and longing of the past week slowly dissipate. Everything was fine with you. You were alive, pushing forward with a smile on your face, happy to simply exist. Admiring your photo didn’t compare to seeing you in person, but it let him vent a little easier, granting him a brief respite from worry, gnawing at him from within. It was enough. For now. For a moment.

“She sends her regards to everyone,” Miko went on, “Oh, and she also asked Ratchet to take a break and mentioned she already bought a gift for Optimus and can’t wait to come back. Hey, I want a present, too!”

Optimus couldn't be certain if another week apart wouldn’t inflict even more damage on his processor and spark, or if longing would eventually consume him entirely. But he knew he was already lost, that you held sway over every aspect of his life. He was wrapped around your finger, tethered by a leash you didn’t even realize existed. And he didn’t mind one bit.

[disaster-j]

Can I just say that this episode really solidified for me that Buck and Tommy are far more of a pining longing will they wont they romance than any of us anticipated they would be

We've seen Buck be dumped and do the dumping so many times before. We've seen how he reacts to being left behind. He clings until he can but when it's over, it's Truly Over for him. We've never seen him struggle so much with staying away. We've never seen him continue to be so love-struck so desperately wanting to seek out an ex's attention.

It's so different from how he usually is after a break-up and I love it.

I love that he's so obsessive about wanting to reach out to Tommy that his friends feel the need to stop him from doing it just in case he gets hurt again. I love that he's coping with it by baking his feelings. I love that the show makes it expressly clear he is NOT the only one who is struggling not to reach out. I love that they showed us that Tommy is also missing Buck. That Tommy is out there somewhere thinking of his man and how badly he wants him back in his life. I love that even if we don't see them together we can see they're still BuckTommy like the show may have taken them away from each other but those characters' arcs are clearly still intertwined and I love it.

I also love how Buck has reacted emotionally to the break-up. Like they're not villainising Tommy. They're not acting like Tommy committed some crime by stepping away. Buck seems to take the whole being dumped thing far better than he ever has before. I don't even think he sees it as being left behind bc we see that he is expecting to speak to Tommy again, to see Tommy again. And he wants it, in whatever way he can have it.

He's not angry at Tommy, he's not even particularly bitter. He's just sad. He's frustrated and lonely and all he wants is his man back. And he better fucking get exactly that or is2g

[bullywugprincess]

As an autistic person, I think some autistic people (and neurotypicals attempting to be good allies) are sometimes doing more harm than good with how insistent we are that autistic people are as capable of achievements as anyone else.

I’m feeling quite tired right now and writing this first go without thinking too much about how I’m wording it, so please bear with me while I explain how I mean that. Basically I just saw a post of a father saying his son is autistic and has struggled to get a job because of it, but he was a really polite, sweet young man, and because of his personality one employer overlooked his struggles and gave him his first job. The post was him showing pride in his sons hood personality and spirit, and half the comments were autistic people saying it was patronising and “of course he can get a job, autistic people can do normal things and achieve things like everyone else.”

And look. I get it. We’re tired of being treated like children. We’re tired of being the subject of “inspo porn”. We’re tired of people acting like we can’t do things just because we’re autistic. But I think a lot of autistic people who are more well adapted and low-needs (again please excuse my terming, I know we don’t use low functioning/high functioning labels anymore but I don’t know what the alternative is) get offended by people acknowledging that some autistic people DO struggle, whether it’s with making friends or academically or with getting and keeping a job. Statistically speaking 3 in 10 autistic adults are in full time employment, compared to 8 in 10 non-disabled adults. And yeah that statistics probably off because of how many people go through life undiagnosed, but the point still stands. Because of learning difficulties, problems with socialisation or being unable to cope in a work environment due to sensory and other issues, many autistic people are unable to work. I don’t know the situation of the son from the post, but it is clearly something he’s struggled with, and the dad is not being patronising by acknowledging that struggle and praising him for overcoming it. By responding to a post like that by saying “of course autistic people can get jobs”, you are doing what ableists do. You are implying that people who can’t work because of their autism are actually just not trying. You are making autistic people who feel really proud of themselves for getting a job despite the difficulties they face seem stupid for it. And, if you’re not careful, you become someone’s excuse to claim autistic people don’t deserve accommodation or disability allowance/benefits because “they don’t need it, autistic people are perfectly capable of getting jobs.”

Another thing to consider: think about that person who said “you’re autistic? But you don’t behave like my 7 year old nephew? That’s not what autism is.” By saying autistic people can do something because YOU can do it is setting a rigid view of What Autism Is. Which like. We’ve all established is bad.

Again I’d like to apologise for how badly worded and ramble-y this is but autism is a disability, and it effects everyone with it differently. Let’s not diminish other people’s struggles

[particlewaveform]

okok i think we should revisit Human Error VOY 7x18 with the added context that seven of nine is a lesbian now. its all about the trauma of being a borg n pushing all that down to play pretend Im Totally A Normal Human Now Im Coping! girl sees herself as the monster in the mirror and IMMEDIATELY throws herself into the most fake comphet relationship she could find - she even literally choose chakotay, calling him "an appropriate choice", like how as a kid ur classmates keep pesting you for your crush so you "choose" a boy to crush on. clearly the words of someone who hasnt 4d chessed her way into Correct Feelings. i, like many of us im sure, think the chakotay/seven romance is badly written but if we consider it instead as repressed seven trying to shove herself into a human mould amigara fault style it gets *chefs kiss*

Chakotay is Safe and Appropriate and often seen as an emotional and moral guide so who better to project "how to be a good human" onto. she doesnt even really see him as HIM this episode and hes mainly there to fufill a loving role - he never talks about himself or expresses anything of his history like he often does with janeway - hes here only as an extension of seven! they do HER hobbies, cooking and piano! he lavishes affection on HER just to lavish it! he is a ken doll for her to try out romance on essentially.

i also think its so telling especially when in the holodeck shes made up so femininely, hair flowing, makeup, tight revealing dresses, fitting herself into this Ideal of what she "should" be to be a Good and Upstanding Human - shes removed all her implants!!!! all the monster and trauma she has!!!!!!!!!

something something gays identifying with monsters something horrible is inside u that will rip n tear its way out smth smmth idk but i think we need to collectively cook with this

[aklaustaleteller]

Like A Barge At Sea

Since Klaus admitted to infidelity, the harrowing pain of losing her family, her happiness, and her love has Y/n clutched in its arms, crushing her in its tight grip for what felt like was going to be forever. But will Klaus be able to hold a certain grudge against her for long? And if he can, then should he have?

Warnings - Quite mean arguments, mentions of heartbreak, infidelity, killing and blood.

Word Count - 4.4k

Masterlist | please reblog the fic if you like it!

Now, once again, long time no see, everyone? I'm so sorry it took me a month to get back to you with this -- the second part to 'Said Yes To Heaven'! I can't even believe I'm writing this and I'm sure you can't believe your eyes either fjskbf. In case you haven't read the first part, I highly recommend that you do! Also, thank you to everyone who pressed me for a part two, without you, this fic would not have happened!! And finally, I really really hope you enjoy reading this!!

A week had passed since Y/n confronted Klaus about the infidelity, and he had said admitted to it as if he hadn't been the one in wrong.

She had desperately been wanting to move out, to get away from him but for the sake of their little girl, and her only, she just moved out of their shared bedroom and into one of rooms for the guests.

Klaus was home less and less, probably to avoid her but not absolutely absent because of his undeniable love for Hope. Y/n just wished that he’d have kept the same love for her as well.

But that didn't mean that whatever of a relationship that was left between them was just mean, petty taunts and narrow-eyed glares. Because even now, there were stolen glances, sneaky grazes of touch, one losing their identity in the other one's eyes until the latter one would blink hastily to disguise the sudden shine in their eyes and move on with their day without daring to steal a glance even just one more time.

And now, instead of the staring bringing a maroon glow upon their cheeks, it brought forth a wave of rage to coarse through their stiff bodies because how dare the other one look so longingly at them while clearly being red handed?

Right now, Y/n was sat in Hope's nursery, breastfeeding her in the middle of night when Klaus had come to wake her up about her hunger. Her gaze was set upon her daughter, whose eyes were merely open in even slits anymore.

Perhaps that was because Klaus hadn't left once Y/n had come into the nursery. He was sitting on the floor a little far from the rocking chair she was on, his arms around his knees as he hugged his legs close to his chest.

Y/n didn't have it in her to ask him to leave. Maybe because she was exhausted, or because she didn't quite trust her voice to not give out on her. Every sparing minute that she spent with him in her sight, she wished so badly that he hadn't gone on and messed everything up.

How could he had done it? How could the man, so paranoid regarding his family that he threatened his ex-girlfriend with her life to stay far away from his home, had gone on to bring infidelity into his relationship with the same woman? It was beyond Y/n's comprehensive limits, she feared.

Y/n hadn’t told anyone, in fear of the ‘one gasp and then, how did it end?’ that she’d receive and further on, have to answer. She wasn’t at that level of acceptance, yet.  

With each glance that she spared at him, with her guards low, all she wanted to do was curl up into a ball and sob hysterically because he had stolen away her nights, her love, her perfect little family and her happiness from her. He had stolen himself, and everything else from her and she wasn't sure if she was coping so well with all of it.

She couldn't raise her gaze because she knew that he was already looking at her, with those green eyes swarming with something she refused to recognise as love. She had to begin taking in deep breaths because the mere thought of looking into his eyes was making her eyes sting.

And, once what felt like the millionth minute, passed in overrated comfortable silence, Y/n was sure that she heard a choked back sob escape Klaus. And that was enough to make the tear in her eyes to deceive her and fall upon the soft clothing on Hope's little frame.

Another tear fell then, and Y/n had to at the end, sniffle, and that made Klaus sprint out of the room.

Broken down in sobs, Y/n held herself together within a white-knuckled fist and put a fast asleep Hope back in her crib, pressing another kiss somewhere on her face before she too, hurriedly walked out of the room towards the guest room, losing herself throughout the entire way with shaking shoulders and held-within sobs that wreaked havoc inside her chest and held her throat with an iron-tight grip.

—

"Can we talk for a bit?" Y/n spoke monotonously, looking straight ahead instead of looking at Klaus, who looked as worn down as if he'd sparred with a dozen people.

She almost asked him about it, out of an old habit, but held her tongue.

"I'm not so su--"

"It's about Hope," Y/n cut him off, looking into his eyes for a split second before he broke the contact first.

He sat down on the sofa’s farthest end with a huff, looking at the ground.

"I don't want what's going on between us to affect Hope," she began, and that had Klaus raising his gaze with such accusatory eyes that Y/n wanted to scream at him for that itself.

"She's growing up too fast. I don't wish for either of us to miss out on her childhood, maybe her first words even," with a quivering voice, she finished, rubbing her sweaty palms on her jeans.

His jaw was clenched, and she wanted to scoff because of the attitude that held his frame so uptight.

"I'm well aware," Klaus began, his eyes holding distance in them. "I'm her father as well, you see? I don't need you teaching me parenting now."

Scoffing, Y/n shook her head. This was not the way she wanted this to go.

"It clearly seems like you do, since you're barely home," she said curtly, daring him to look her in the eyes and then pretend that he hadn't legitimately cheated on her.

Klaus got up at that. "I would be home more if it weren't for your looming presence!" He exclaimed, raking one hand through his hair before clutching it on the back of his head.

"My looming presence!" Y/n shouted, completely taken aback before hurt began to settle it. "You cheated on me, you bastard!"

"I'm not doing this tonight," Klaus mumbled before he disappeared into the master bedroom.

Eyes turned blacker than her worst nights and the golden rim of an eclipse shining through, Y/n clenched her fists to the extent that she almost wanted for her knuckles to rip open the skin stretching upon them. Brimming with a burning hate, she harshly wiped the tears off her cheeks.

"I hate you!" She screamed, breaking down into sobs when Hope's wailing tore apart the house and Klaus slammed the door shut after showing to Y/n the sight of Hope clung onto his chest as he lulled her.

"You're okay, little wolf," she heard him whisper. "Just a thunder, s' all," he cooed, and Y/n held her head tightly, crouching, wishing to rip her ears out or rip his throat out.

But most overwhelmingly, she felt guilt swallowing her contorted face. She'd gone to talk about saving Hope from the trauma of her parent's failed marriage, and then proceeded to produce a blood-curdling scream knowing the little one was sensitive to the smallest of sighs.

And then Klaus' hateful glare looking down upon her flashed through her mind and she raced out of the house before realising that there was no one she could run off to.

So, upon returning, she sat on the porch of their home, tears icy on her skin as she cried with a shaking body, eyes set on the open sky while everything inside of her begged for all of this horror to be taken back and for her intricately built family to be returned to her.

—

Klaus' eyes hurt, for the never-ending pain wouldn't stop seeping through the cracks in his eyes on the nights when all he wanted was to give in to peace by lying down in his lonely bed with his wife and their little wolf, once again.

And it feels unfair that he's the one losing his mind, the one who's been robbed of his entire life when she's the one who crumpled his heart in her fist by throwing an allegation of infidelity at him.

He hadn't cheated. And he knew that saying this to Y/n would end both of their miseries, but he couldn't quite bring himself to it. What would he say now, since he didn't deny her the very night she'd confronted him about it?

Still, he remembered the tiredness weighing down her eyes and tension twisting each one of her features in a stoned manner. So innocently, she'd asked him after taking a shuddering breath – "did you sleep with Aurora?"

The horror in her eyes had been evident when the love-sickness had drained down his whole posture and his eyes had transitioned from confusion to hurt to a cold, empty gaze in a matter of seconds.

He waited for her to apologise or to break out laughing, saying she was just joking, for a couple minutes. But when she kept on staring at him with wide eyes that held nothing but shock and betrayal in them, he'd swallowed the lump in his throat, accepting that that was just how it was going to be.

"Yes. Yes I did," he'd spat, hoping the anger lacing his tone would make her think. Think that of course he hadn't, how could she think of him in such a way? But she instead slapped him across the face with flared nostrils and tears streaking her cheeks and sped away.

He'd lost control that night and raced away from home as he transitioned into his wolf with one final leap into the forest.

He'd howled the loudest in a long, long time, that night. He'd felt it resonate through his chest and leak through the corners of his eyes as he'd moved through the forest with the wind, leaving behind traces of his tears.

But, upon returning, he realised that maybe he'd been a little too dramatic. Maybe, he'd just cried wolf. He'd showered and hoped that after dinner, they could sit and be civil about it all and work through his hurdle together.

But when he saw her hurting, the knife in his chest twisted deeper as he realised just how easily she'd believed it to be true.

Leaving it to rest for a couple days, Klaus kept on hoping that she'd see for herself what she'd been doing and come around to him. But she never did, and he felt himself fading away day by day.

The previous night, he'd been sitting by the window in the master bedroom, watching over her crumbling figure out on the porch and hating himself for having done this to her. And with resolution, he'd straightened his back and turned away, reminding himself that he wasn't the one with tainted hands.

And despite that, he'd gone over to check whether she'd fallen asleep or not, and then he’d carried her back to the room, laying her down beside Hope's crib while he went to sleep on the sofa in the corner of the room. 

—

Y/n was limping. 

In a flash Klaus was standing in front of her, holding onto her shoulders and looking down at her leg which seemed a little crooked. 

“What happened?” Klaus asked, eyes set on the trail of blood that had seeped through her pants, staining it. 

She shook off his hands then, turning to walk away and up the stairs. She could’ve sped up, but she also should’ve been healed by now considering the fact that she was a hybrid.

Taking advantage of the situation, Klaus sped in front of her, just a step above her on the staircase. He flinched when her eyes flashed golden, but due to reflex, he knew his eyes had flashed as well when he saw the reflection in her sombre eyes. 

“C’mon, tell me,” he whispered, hoping that she’d drop the attitude and just answer him for once. 

“I don’t know,” she began, and Klaus’ shoulders visibly relaxed. “I was running, then something came flying at me and hit me on the leg,” she shrugged, and Klaus could hear that she wasn’t breathing necessarily enough. 

So he backed up a couple steps, and leaned on the railing of the staircase. 

“But you should’ve healed right away,” Klaus pushed, the wheels in his head turning while a frown settled deep between his brows. “Unless…”

“It was a sneak attack,” Y/n finished for him, sighing. 

“Were you turned when you were running?” Klaus asked, moving closer to her as anger began tightening his features and the muscles in his arms flexed under the thin shirt when he fisted his palms. 

“Yes, Klaus.”

It felt strange, the way she said his name with no emotion lingering on it. But Klaus shook off the feeling, pushing it to the back of his head to dwell on it later in the night. 

“So you must’ve caught a sniff!” Klaus exclaimed, hyped that they were getting somewhere. But then he deflated, “if it were someone you’ve met,” he trailed off, now biting his lip. 

“I did, catch a sniff,” Y/n began, standing up straighter as ferocity came ablaze in her eyes. 

Both of them stared at each other in silence, before a certain realisation dawned upon Klaus and he opened his mouth only for no words to come out. 

“You’re right,” Y/n gritted her teeth, affirming Klaus’ unspoken conclusion. “I would’ve finished her off right there had you not… been on my mind,” Y/n stole her gaze from him then, looking down on the flooring from the sidelines of the staircase. 

Shaking off some of his anger to focus on his wife, Klaus offered her his hand. “Come, you’ll need the whole night to heal.” But when she refused to acknowledge it, he exhaled frustratedly. 

Still, when she took no action, Klaus picked her up like he had on the day they’d …said yes to heaven when saying yes to one another,  and carried her to the bedroom at a normal pace, just to agitate further. 

“Fuck you!” Y/n gritted out her last protest, hitting his chest one last time before he was lying her down on the bed and walking back out the door with a smile he wasn’t hiding well. 

He turned in the doorway then, looking at her with raised eyebrows. “Don’t try to clean up yourself, I’ll be back in a moment,” he nodded at her one last time before he was speeding away and out of the house in a flash.

Y/n, who was left behind feeling nothing but the static silence inside of her, moved so that she was sitting closer to Hope’s crib. 

She began thinking if, only for Hope, she should give Klaus another chance. But then, he hadn’t even asked for one. 

Caressing Hope’s head, Y/n slipped her fingers into her hair. The strands were only inches long so far, but it almost felt like her hair had grown overnight. That made Y/n’s chest heavy, realising that even after trying so hard, she had missed out upon the subtle things of Hope’s childhood, already.

And, that was because she had been wallowing in her own misery the whole time. 

She wanted nothing more than to put this blame on Klaus as well, but instead, Y/n brushed away her tears and lied down with Hope on top of her. 

The little girl was sound-asleep, but still she managed to fist Y/n’s shirt and snuggle closer to her. 

Y/n began to rub her back then, staring at the ceiling wondering what Klaus had gone out for. Maybe to confront Aurora for going too far, and crossing the line. Y/n felt herself shrink when she realised that the possibility of that was way too high for her liking.

She pondered as to why he hadn’t asked her for another chance. Why he hadn’t asked for her forgiveness or even shown in his actions that he felt guilty. 

Had he really been that desperate to get rid of her?

A tear slipped past her eyes and into her ear, and Y/n felt her face contort as she tried her hardest to not break down. 

Wondering how long he had felt that way about her, Y/n tilted her face on either side to wipe away the tears on her face on the pillow. She sniffled, and slowly and slowly, she felt herself crumple under all of her grief and anger, causing her to begin trembling.

So she put Hope back into her crib, and curled up on her side, facing away from her daughter as she broke down into shambles, all over again. 

She felt pathetic everytime she lost control like this, it was getting embarrassing and exhausting. She curled into a smaller ball as her throat began to burn due to the sobs she was fighting to hold back.   

Not confident whether she’d fallen asleep for a couple of seconds or through the night, Y/n lent up on her elbows to see it was dark outside. 

Turning to see the clock, Y/n instead saw Klaus, sitting up against the headboard, already looking at her. 

“What time is it?” She asked him, rubbing the sleep from her eyes after noticing that the clock had stopped again. 

“It’s midnight,” he smiled and Y/n panicked, instantly getting off the bed in order to reach Hope. 

“I fed her!” Klaus whisper-yelled before she could’ve picked the little one up, repeating himself when she looked at him frozen on the spot. 

“I’ve fed her before, you don’t need to be so shocked,” Klaus spoked defensively, turning on the lamp on his bedside table. 

Y/n sighed then, sitting back on the bed and shifting until she was also perched up against the headboard. They hadn’t been on the same bed in more than a month. Y/n began playing with her fingers, eyes set on her palms.

“Were you crying?” Klaus mumbled, intertwining his hands. 

Her breath hitched, she’d forgotten about that. “Doesn’t matter,” she answered curtly. 

“It does,” Klaus said. “To me, it does.”

Y/n scoffed at that, taking a quick glance at him before she looked away again, suddenly conscious about her bed-head and probably red-rimmed eyes that even felt a bit puffy. 

“Shut it, Klaus.” Y/n shook her head. “You don’t need to small-talk me.”

“I’m not –” he cut himself off, sitting back with a huff. “I need to tell you something,” he began, his teeth clenched due to unease.

“What?” Y/n’s body went rigid, preparing herself for whatever blow he was about to send her way. 

“I didn’t,” Klaus took a deep breath. “I didn’t sleep with her,” he exhaled sharply before going as still as a statue.

Y/n turned to look at him incredulously at first, before she opened her mouth to speak. 

“What?” She almost shrieked, it being the most unbelievable thing she could’ve ever heard in the moment. “Come again?” She pressed, leaning towards him and looking at him as if he had added insult to her injury. 

“I did not cheat on you,” Klaus repeated, looking at the wall ahead instead of looking at her.

“We can’t do this here,” Y/n said and the both of them sped to the living room’s sofa. Well, Y/n, as well as she could. 

“Are you hearing yourself, Klaus?”

He didn’t say anything, causing her to get up on her injured leg and start pacing around. 

“You are saying you didn’t cheat on me?”

Klaus nodded softly. 

“So, you didn’t sleep with Aurora?” 

Klaus looked up at that, holding her gaze as he said – “I killed her, actually. Tonight, that is,” he told her and Y/n’s face went pale. 

“Wha - you did what?”

“I killed her, Y/n. Hurting you was the farthest I could let her go,” he shrugged nonchalantly. “Should’ve done that the day she showed up the second time, now that I think about it.” 

“So – so why didn’t you deny me then? When I asked you about it?” Y/n came to sit beside him, still on the farthest end of the sofa, due to pain shooting through her leg again. 

“Why do you think, Y/n?” Now, he was losing patience. “I’m your husband and you chose to trust some clearly manipulative-vampire over me!” He shouted as lightly as he could, getting up.

But he stood still, unlike Y/n who’d been pacing around as if she’d been losing it. 

“So… you said yes out of spite?”

“Of course, I did!” He insisted. “And I was thinking that someday you’ll come around and see for yourself but you never did!”

Y/n’s jaw clicked. “For so many days, you’ve put the both of us through misery because of this?” Y/n began, getting angrier despite seeing clearly what he was trying to show her. 

“This is not about that! This is about the fact that you don’t have enough trust in me to know that not once in my immortal life would I ever deceive you!” Klaus felt like ranting, and he’d begun pulling on his hair. 

“I was insecure!” Y/n shouted, tears brimming her eyes. “I had given birth days before and some chick comes and tells me ‘she’d have married you as well had she known previously how good you were in bed’!” Her breath caught in her throat. “You couldn’t have expected me to come home and coddle you then!”

Klaus’ eyes were wide, and he was wondering if there was a way someone could kill a person twice. 

“You could’ve just told me that you did not and neither of us would’ve gone through this harrowing pain!” 

Tears were falling down like raindrops of a downpour on her cheeks, so Klaus took the final steps to get close enough to her on order to cup her face. 

He brushed away her tears with his calloused thumbs, hating the grief she held in her eyes still. Perhaps, he should’ve told her earlier. 

“Shh, it’s okay,” he whispered, pulling her into him as he held her to prevent her from breaking down into pieces. “We’ve got each other, haven’t we? We can come out of this together,” he said, holding her so still that he’d stopped breathing for a second.

Hiccups and sobs were flowing out of her endlessly, until only her sniffles were the sounds in the otherwise silent home.

“I can’t tell if I’m happy that you didn’t cheat on me, or - or,” she took a quick breath, hating how it was hardly reaching her lungs. “Or mad that you didn’t tell me sooner,” she spoke, finally wrapping her arms around him and clutching onto his shirt tightly. 

“I just hope you’ll trust me a little more after this,” Klaus whispered and felt her nodding vigorously against his shoulder. His heart picked up upon the realisation that he had her enclosed in his arms again. 

A chuckle rippled through his chest and he pulled her back, some of her hair strands still sticking onto him. He tucked them back, matting down her hair before he pressed a kiss on her forehead. 

When he backed away, Y/n slipped her arms around his neck before reaching for his mouth that was spread in a wide grin. 

“I hate you so much,” she laughed, pressing her forehead against his with her eyes closed, while Klaus gazed directly at her and pressed another quick kiss to her mouth.

“Like a barge at sea, in the storm I stay clear,” he sing-song’ed, attacking her face with multiple kisses when she cringed away. 

“Did you see how much Hope’s hair has grown?” Y/n asked him excitedly, eyes wide as saucers as she went back to sit down on the sofa. 

“I did! She’s going to have your brunette hair,” he pouted, putting one of his arms around her shoulder and pulling her into his side. 

She snuggled against his chest instinctively, albeit curling up into him while he rubbed his hands up and down her shoulder. 

“You were so vile the day my shout made her cry,” Y/n spoke quietly, her chest tightening and her eyes moistening again.

“I’m so sorry about that, love,” he sighed. “I hadn’t meant that. It’d just stung a bit that you’d think of me as a …bad father.”

“I hadn’t meant it in that way,” Y/n said, looking up at him. “You know I’d not want anyone else as a father for her,” she shrugged, a smile playing on her lips. 

“Such a good one you are that I might be inclined to think you should have another one to look after, a couple years from now, that is” she laughed, winking at him before breaking into a bigger laugh. 

“Shouldn’t have proposed the idea right now if you didn’t want one until another few years!” He whined jokingly, kissing her temple with some extra pressure.

The laughter died down then, and the both of them sat in complete silence. 

“You really were like a barge at sea, though,” she mumbled. “Was I the storm?”

“Hm, I guess?” He said, and giggled when she hit him on the chest. 

Y/n stared into the distance for a while, glad that the storm was over and that she had her life back. Even the thought of the utter misery she’d gone through, thinking she’d never have her family back again, made her shudder. 

“I love you,” Klaus whispered and Y/n looked up at him with a smile, squeezing his hand. “And, I’m sorry.”

“Forever and always, Klaus” she said, lying back down on his chest. “And I’m sorry too,” she went to press a kiss to his neck, but he moved to get off the sofa. 

“C’mon!” She protested, since she’d begun to think of catching up on some much needed sleep. 

“Alright, you need to take a bath to clean up whatever wound you’ve got going on,” Klaus proposed seriously, picking her up bridal style. 

Y/n gasped then. “Do I smell?” She questioned him, mouth still open ajar. 

“No you don’t!” He reassured her before a coy smile stretched across his mouth. “But I do need you to smell a bit more like you have mate,” he said with a grin, before pointing at himself upon putting her back down, now in the bathroom. 

“Oh, I really hate you,” Y/n mumbled bashfully, pretending to look away while Klaus began to get rid of his clothes.

[eddiegettingshot]

Okay but Eddie, at least in early season 3, had anger issues. That's not a bad thing, that's just a thing. A *lot* of people have anger issues, up to 30% of adults. He punched a guy over a parking spot. That's anger issues. This is coming from someone who *has* them, and whose family has them. He's clearly found an off-screen outlet (maybe Muay Thai?) and is managing them, but to say he never had anger issues would be a lie.

he had An Anger Issue at a very specific time in his life where he felt very specific anger at a very specific person and dealt with it extremely extremely badly… at that time. but the whole point is that that’s an aberration because of the 4 different traumas he experienced all at once and was no longer able to cope with (and was not interested in coping with in a healthy way). outside of this specific s3 arc, the only other time he’s actually ever lashed out unfairly has been at bobby in s5 (also when he was going through it severely). eddie is not a guy with a short temper whatsoever and he doesn’t get angry even in situations where anger would be a normal response—when buck is harassing him in 2x01, when mitchell threatens chris in 5x06, when buck hurts him in 7x04, when gerrard is being an ass in 8x01-8x04 (ironically buck is the one who can’t control his temper in all of these situations). his anger is reserved for instances where chris is wronged and to indicate that he is literally on the verge of breaking down completely, and it works specifically BECAUSE he is not an angry guy. he doesn’t need to “manage” them regularly because he doesn’t… have them. like the entire point of the character is that he doesn’t lose his cool except for when things are very very wrong inside him.

[theflashjaygarrick]

It's a missed opportunity that despite Roy Harper and Jason Todd hanging out now there's been never any tension between about them or exploration of their differing approaches and perspectives on the drug crisis. Particularly because for both of them it is deeply personal.

Roy Harper.

Roy became addicted to drugs in the 1971 comic Snowbirds Don't Fly which was Neil Adam’s and Dennis O'neill's attempt to tackle the "youth's greatest problem!" drug use and addiction. I feel like all most people know is that Speedy took drugs and Ollie took it badly, but that honestly ignores the whole point of the story. The story challenged contextual stigma around addiction and drug use as a personal failing or something that only happened to weak people. It explored how it could happen to anyone, even a hero like Speedy. It focused on the social factors such as racism and poverty and how they push people into substance abuse as a way to cope. It even turns the trope of the evil foreign drug cartel on its head by making the guy behind the drug supply a wealthy white American man in who runs a Pharmaceutical company, doesn't do drugs, and actively mocks the people he profits off the suffering of.

The point therefore is twofold. Firstly, drug users are people just like you and me and it is vital to be compassionate to people struggling with addiction. Ollie who yells at and hits Roy and leaves him due to anger and fear is clearly in the wrong. Hal and Dinah who look after Roy and stand beside him at his friend's funeral and as he confronts Ollie are clearly in the right. Secondly, the solution is not to focus on the drugs but instead to deal with the systemic problems of inequality, oppression, trauma and disenfranchised youth.

Despite parts of it ageing bad (the use of slurs was to demonstrate the damage of racism, but I feel uncomfortable having slurs uncensored in a comic book written by white authors) it is a surprisingly progressive take on addiction for a mainstream 70s DC comic. It also clearly demonstrates Roy's opinion on the drug problem and how to deal with it. He sees anger and going after dealers/manufacturers (like Ollie did) to not be enough. Instead the real change comes from helping the people in that situation by improving their lives and compassionately helping them at their worst.

Enter Jason Todd.

For context Jason Todd has had almost his entire life shaped by trauma of substance abuse. His (adoptive) mother Catherine struggled with addiction and overdosed just months before he met Batman, effectively orphaning him. Soon after he was found by Batman who essentially drafted him into his crusade on crime, not considering that being a vigilante may be potentially damaging for an already traumatised child.

But when he came back in UTRH he decided he could best help Gotham if he killed (largely non-costumed) criminals and controlled the city's criminal underworld himself. After violently assuming control of the drug trade, Jason imposed his own rules for dealers, most famously that he would kill anyone who sold drugs to children or near schools. Later while incarcerated Jason Todd killed 82 Blackgate inmates (and harmed over a hundred) by poisoning the prison food. This mass murder was intrinsically indiscriminate and due to the US prison system it is reasonable to assume people charged with drug offences were included in the death count.

Jason does have deep childhood trauma associated with addiction and drug use and wants to help prevent suffering. That being said, his approach treats drugs as a criminal problem to be eradicated or controlled, not just a symptom of deeper social issues. He kills people who sell drugs to kids, rather than helping building a support system so kids aren't pushed into abusing substances to cope and people don't have to deal to survive.

What does this mean?

Scott Lobdell got details of Roy's addiction wrong and distorted him into a reckless idiot who has been ostracised from the community. But if it was done right their interaction and opposing perspectives/experiences could be really interesting. Both hate drugs and the drug trade, but the way they conceptualise this hatred differs significantly.

Roy focuses on helping the individual and addressing deeper social problems, seeing drugs as a devastating but ultimately symptomatic. Jason sees drug use as first and foremost a criminal issue, with true benefits being achieved through controlling the criminal underworld.

Roy's priority is therefore supporting people struggling with addiction and showing compassion for their situation. Jason doesn't really focus on ways to help the individuals suffering from addiction, as much as mitigating the overall harm and fitting the drug trade into parameters he views as acceptable.

I think it would add needed complexity to their relationship (and to Jason's redemption if we're going that route) as well as dealing with the more 'war-on-drug' elements of UTRH. Also it would help Roy stand on his own as a strong, articulate leader with a dark past rather than being (at least for a while) reduced to essentially Jason's sidekick.

[xenosagaepisodeone]

my parents are watching this movie where a teen copes badly with learning that his mom cheated on his dad, but the dialogue is clearly written from the perspective of an aggrieved husband so it comes across as the kid having an oedipal complex-like sense of ownership over his mother. at the start of the film his mom is being nice and trying to make things up to him and his dad (moreso specifically the kid!), but the kid keeps needling her about how she tore their family apart. as I'm thinking "I could never care this much about one of my parents having an affair, man :|", he starts breaking plates and lodging vulgar accusations at her in the vein of "did you FUCK the electrician too?", expressing was I can only interpret as sexual frustration from the vicarious emasculation he has sustained from her betrayal to his father-avatar. the actual father in this film just kind of passively grumbles and sleeps on the couch btw.

[loriache]

honestly i'm kind of interested in the idea of laios in an arranged marriage. because obviously straight-up inherited monarchies are ...bad, to say the least! but it's what the characters are familiar with (even laios' father's extremely local, extremely minor leadership role is inherited, presumably through the male line). and it isn't just about what they think the best way to run melini is; in terms of ensuring that the other longed-lived nations respect melini's continued sovereignty, having it passed down in a manner that's close enough to their own ways for them to understand it and respect it is important. And it seems like most of the other nations have leadership through inheritance - thought that isn't confirmed for certain except with the elves.

Also, a marriage carries the potential to establish foreign allies - something melini is certainly lacking. A marriage could come with resources they'll badly need, treaties of mutual defence, money, legitimacy and political capital... not that these things can't be worked around, but if laios isn't strongly opposed, there are a lot of advantages! and i don't think he would be, because that's the framework for marriage (conferring practical advantages, building intracommunity relationships and providing a partner to do important work that he can't do) that he had grown up with. he isn't exactly a romantic and I doubt he's holding out for any sort of relationship of that nature.

Like, I don't think it's impossible that they would go with this path, because it's the most obvious and it carries a lot of advantages and it's what almost all the decision-making characters would consider normal and not objectionable. and it could be so interesting.

I think Laios would have major hangups if expected (i.e., by Marcille) to establish a genuine, romantic interest in a woman. Whether because of his sexual or romantic orientation, or just his own deep-seated trauma about rejection and being inherently disgusting and scary. And I think he'd hate the idea of having kids, too, and be very frightened of being like his father. But I don't think he'd refuse on that basis; he could cope with a marriage contract, with clearly laid-out expectations and responsibilities. And when it came to having a kid, I think he'd be reluctant to express that he doesn't want to do it, because he isn't naive and he understood when he agreed to be king it would carry responsibilities like this. It's clear from his nightmare that he already felt pressure from his parents to have children, probably magnified by the fact his father has got a position, responsibilities and wealth to pass on. Obviously he isn't a perfect martyr, so he might struggle when it comes to actually going through with it - but I don't think he'd actually, outright refuse. I think he might do it even though he doesn't want to, and I think that could be really messy in a way that appeals to me.

I don't know, there's something about negotiating these kinds of complicated situations that's interesting to me. and i love a platonic marriage. If they find a woman who has an interest in education, for example, and can work with marcille on setting up schools and universities. she'd ideally be politically savvy enough to be an able partner to laios: even though kabru can and would continue to do a lot of that, there are different spheres that a queen and a prime minister can work within!

how would their relationship work? maybe she finds laios' perspective on the world, and his frankness, unexpectedly liberating after an extremely controlled, cloistered upbringing. maybe she had a rebellious phase, has magic, or something else which makes her a relatively unpopular candidate for marriage - even as melini grows in power, i doubt that they'd be getting offers for the cream of the crop in terms of perceived value on the marriage market, because laios' relationship is a bit too ambivalent/monstrous for that, and melini too new. maybe she's a widow! an older woman, wouldn't that be cool - though they'd want her young enough that she could definitely still have kids.

certainly i think he'd be happy for her to pursue other relationships, though ideally in a manner that couldn't produce illegitimate kids. with other relationships in play, that's even more interesting. like, both kabru and toshiro have complicated emotions relating to infidelity. i think kabru would actually find it quite cathartic to be in the kind of high-status environment that rejected his mother for perceived infidelity, pursuing an affair that all parties consent to, though he'd likely be incredibly aware of the public image - since "image" is what he was rejected for. toshiro... i just really really love the way he'd feel about being the "other woman" in laios' marriage, considering his feelings about his father and maizuru. especially given how much closer he is to maizuru than his mother, being in her position...! his emotions would be so complex, it's incredibly tasty. i bet he'd make a bunch of assumptions about how laios' wife feels about it and be totally wrong, and that's so interesting. also, i think laios' wife should fuck marcille (she and falin have an open relationship).

[drdemonprince]

Heck, I was just wondering about catastrophising. I've seen a lot of it these past days that makes me glad I don't really do social media anymore, because hot damn. But people I actually know, and have a rapport with, have gone absolutely mental and it hurts to see them take a running leap off the deep end into catastrophising. (Including spouting conspiracy bullshit about controlled opposition...) I guess it's the shock and this is them trying cope poorly with it, but damn, it hurts to see and is so fucking unproductive and draining.

it drives me fucking nuts and makes me so anxious. I think the nature of how social media works (and the advent of the 24 hour news cycle that came before it) means that people are especially unskillful in stopping rumination at this point in human history. people lock on to unproductive thought cycles really badly and if anything it's socially encouraged. I think all you can really do is step aside when people's explosiveness is getting to you -- it's been getting to me a lot these days. When loved ones spiral at me I try to let them get it out of their system and then find my space.

I've been keeping myself mentally busy by reviewing a recent journal article on global transmisogynistic attitudes that I'm going to write an essay about next week, and that's been helping me feel like I'm doing something useful to others while also keeping my mind engaged. It's a really impactful study I'm excited to share with a more lay audience, because it demonstrates so clearly that transmisogyny is its own unique bias that is independent from & more severe than prejudice against trans men, but it also has key flaws because its author is a cis woman with apparently no knowledge of the theories of transmisogyny that trans femme scholars have put out. Anyway, it's good to have things we feel capable of working on and important we find our niches for making a difference.