#(discovered my hate for love triangles)

[valewritessss]

Wait I never got much into Sokeefe bc I was more focused on all the other characters and bc little me had just discovered that there’s a 50/50 chance you pick the wrong love interest in a love triangle so sokeefe was the last thing on my mind but seeing quotes on my feed is making me want to read it again but this time expecting sokeefe

[golden-moony]

king of my heart | smau

pairings: lando norris x fem!reader | pato o'ward x fem!reader

summary: y/n is an F1 content creator loved among the grid and the fans, and more than one person ships her with lando due to how close they've always been. but when y/n goes to her first IndyCar race, the last thing she expects is being involved in rumours with another mclaren driver.

warnings: love triangle? kinda.

author's note: i might turn this into a mini series but i'll see how it goes. btw english it's not my first language so if there's any grammatical error please let me know so i can fix it, ty🧡 now enjoy!

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4

------------------------------------------------------

yourusername posted to their story!

[caption 1; it's indycar weekend in Long Beach, babyyyy!] [caption 2; time for practice and snacks🌞]

patriciooward

liked by indycar, zbrownceo, yourusername, and 83,527 others!

patriciooward INDY500 colors and back in the streeetz🤩

user1 lookin' goooood🔥

arrowmclaren it'll look even better with confetti covering it😉 user2 admin knows a win is coming!! 💪

user3 Este es tu año, cabrón! VAMOOOOS 🇲🇽

user4 is it a requirement to be handsome to drive in mclaren? cause daaaamn

user5 same girl, same

yourusername black is the new papaya fr 🔥 can't wait for tomorrow!

patriciooward hopefully you'll be wearing #5 user6 OMG?!?!!!??? yourusername can't show favoritism! i'm a professional, sir patriciooward it can be our secret then 😉 user7 OH MY- HELLOOOOO? user8 landonorris come get your girl bro!!! user9 omfg mr o'ward i wasn't familiar with your game user10 y/n sweety, wrong mclaren driver landonorris 🤨 user11 she really said i want a mclaren, don't care which one😭 user12 and she's so real for that

user13 let's goooo Pato!! 🦆🧡

user14 y/n and pato's exchange?? NEW SHIP HAS ARRIVED!

user15 i feel like i'm betraying my roots but pato and y/n would be the it couple fr user16 SO TRUE user17 pato and lando deserve sooo much better.

user18 NOT LANDO REPLYING TO THE COMMENT 😂😂

user19 f1twt is about to have a blast with this one 🍿 user20 they already have #teampato and #teamlando hashtags going on 😭😭

yourusername posted to their story!

[caption 1; preparation for ✨qualy day✨] [caption 2; that's how you arrive in style]

yourusername

liked by pierregasly, alexanderrossi, shelovesformula1, and 76,088 others!

yourusername First IndyCar race ✅ can't explain how incredible this weekend was! I’ve had the pleasure of chatting to so many cool people, discovering so much about this series and meeting so many of you! 🧡 can't wait to show you everything soon 😘

user1 what a babeeeee 😍

frosenqvist so great to meet you! hope you come to another one again soon! 🏁

arrowmclaren we second this! user2 she's an indy girl now 😎 tkanaan especially after all the fun we had last night😜 yourusername oh i'll definitely come back for more races (and parties ofc🙊) user3 she's part of the family now! love to see it user4 mclaren team 🤝 us: being in love with y/n

user5 PATO INTERVIEW??!! WE WON

lissiemackintosh so happy to have met you!! 💖

yourusername can't wait to see u again 🥹 user6 MY FAVES 🤩🤩 user7 girls supporting girls 💞 user8 we need a colab!

landonorris y/n get out of there. That's not your family!

carlossainz55 y/n please hurry, the kid has missed you maxverstappen1 y/n please hurry, we can't stand him anymore maxfewtrell y/n please hurry, he gets whiny when you're not around alex_albon y/n please hurry, oscar is about to commit crime oscarpiastri that is correct, so please y/n hurry landonorris when i asked y'all to back me up, this is NOT what i meant 🙄 yourusername if it helps at all, i've miss you all 🫶 (except Lando) landonorris i hate y'all fr user9 this is the kind of content i pay my internet bill for 😂

user10 literal queen 👑

user11 she couldn't become lando's wag so now she goes to indy to try to find a man lol such a clout chaser

user12 girl stfu she's literally just doin her job user13 try not to sound so bitter next time 💋 user14 get a life, hater

user15 MOTHER IS MOTHERING

user16 i don't think we're talking enough about that last photo

user17 RIGHT?! Y/N X PATO LET'S GOO user18 nah y/n x lando >>>>>>>>

patooward Indy looks good on you 💯 i wonder who took that amazing first pic

yourusername credits to you, amateur😘 user19 you can't convince me they're not flirting user20 i truly don't know if i wanna be pato or y/n... i only know i'd hate to be lando rn 😭 user21 y/n and lando are the endgame user22 Y/N X PATO TILL THE END

landonorris posted to his story!

[caption; safe and sound where she belongs]

sooo.... y'all want part 2?

[randxmthxughts]

Avatar Masterlist

JC Avatar Universe fanfiction - constantly updating (*- longer fics)

I write for Neteyam, Tsu'tey, Ao'nung, open to writing for Lo'ak, Jake

Neteyam:

*All For You - Neteyam x Ta’unui ! reader / enemies to lovers! - pt. 1 | pt. 2

when Quaritch attacks the Ta’unui water clan, Y/N flees to the Metkayina clan for safety. She develops feelings for Neteyam but the tensions grow when Y/N finds out that Neteyam is the son of Jake Sully - the man she hates.

*Be Mine - Neteyam x Metkayina ! reader / fake dating!

the one, where neteyam pretends to court the reader to avoid all of the nagging from his parents and a group of admirers. of course, it doesn’t take long for her to fall for him too

Human Stuff - Neteyam x Human ! reader (afab) / period cramps  

the one, where a confused na’vi teenager tries to comfort his human friend while she’s on her period

Your lips, my lips, apocalypse - Neteyam x Omatikaya ! reader

when y/n hangs out with the women at the lab and decides to put on lipstick to feel pretty, her friends start to make fun of her. but not neteyam, he thinks she looks cute

*And I cried when you first said, "Oel ngati kameie" - Neteyam x Metkayina ! reader / forbidden love!

despite her father’s wariness of the sully’s and their ‘demon-blood,’ y/n can’t help but feel drawn to neteyam. as the two of them bond over their similar experiences of parental pressure, he finds himself falling in love with her

*Second Chances - Neteyam x Omatikaya ! reader / love triangle!

y/n and lo'ak were destined to be together, or so she thought... after moving to awa'atlu with the sully's, lo'ak starts to fall for a certain metkayina girl, leaving y/n completely heartbroken. it is unexpected when neteyam, who has been secretly harboring feelings for her, decides to tend to her wounds. can y/n reciprocate his love?

Nerves Talking - Neteyam x Crybaby ! reader / misscommunication

after spending months teaching his little sister’s friend how to hunt, neteyam is surprised by the lack of her progress. later on, he discovers then that she is just too nervous to be around him because of her not-so-small crush

Tunutu (Crush) - Neteyam x Omatikaya ! reader / childhood friends to lovers

although neteyam had never reciprocated her feelings, choosing him was always an easy decision for y/n, one of those she could make in a heartbeat. so when another man tries to win her affections, neteyam suddenly becomes aware of what he has been missing out on

*Chosen by Eywa - Neteyam x Omatikaya ! reader / series (complete)

eywa makes no mistakes... in the midst of his preparation to become the future olo'eyktan, neteyam is told to be with a chosen mate. guided by the signs of eywa, tsahik picks y/n, a woman orphaned by the war, whose heart already belongs to another. y/n's whole world begins to crumble, as she is forced into the loveless bond. will neteyam and y/n be able to overcome the odds and find their true happiness?

Tsu'tey:

Child of Our Own - Tsu'tey x Omatikaya ! reader

seeing his friends already awaiting their firstborns, tsu'tey begins to yearn for a baby of his own, but he is too shy to tell you about it

Unrequited Love - Tsu’tey x Omatikaya ! reader / smut

you had been in love with tsu'tey for as long as you could remember. so when you see his heart break again at the loss of another mate, you offer him comfort, expecting nothing in return

Unrequited - Tsu’tey x Omatikaya ! reader / series (complete)

based on Unrequited Love: y/n had been in love with tsu'tey since they were kids, watching him get his heart broken over and over, until he became hardened. on one particular night, she offers him intimacy with no expectations in return, which sparks up a complex relationship between them. they grapple with guilt, unrequited love, and newfound intimacy, as y/n and tsu'tey navigate the depths of their feelings for each other

Captain Save a Hoe - Tsu'tey x Avatar ! reader

grumpy tsu’tey having to take care of a clumsy avatar!reader, and eventually warming up to her

Let Me Hear My Child - Tsu'tey x Pregnant ! reader / headcanons

tsu'tey's reaction to finding out his mate is pregnant

You'll be a great dad - Tsu'tey x Pregnant ! reader / Tsu'tey x Jake

tsu'tey is overwhelmed with anxiety and fear upon hearing the news of his mate's pregnancy and becoming a father, but like a good friend, jake is there to calm him down

Can't wait to meet you - Tsu'tey x Pregnant ! reader

pregnant!reader having to reassure tsu'tey that he will be a great father, despite his fears

Just Married - Tsu'tey x Female ! mate

when you stepped into the public eye for the first time after your mating, tsu'tey couldn't contain the overflowing affection he held for you. but because you felt insecure about the way you were being perceived by the clan, tsu'tey decided to prove you otherwise

Ao'nung:

Heaven in Hiding - Ao'nung x Metkayina ! reader / secret dating!

ao'nung and you have been hiding your relationship for some time now but there comes a moment when you want more than that

Thinking out loud about avatar (my opinions/analyses/theories):

sully kids watching jake's old diary logs

neteyam taking the move to awa'atlu the best out of the sully's

jake cringing at "my husband was toruk makto" bc of his own insecurities

jake and quaritch making up

-- let me know, if you want to be added to my taglist ♡ 

[ckret2]

Even if you never explore or talk about it in goldilocks, what angle are you approaching past fiddauthor in the fic. Love triangle that only exist in bill head or fiddleford having a strong one sided love

I haven't fully decided yet.

Some of the fandom has a perception like fiddauthor and billford are opposed sides of a war, like if you like one of them it means you hate the other and want to see it "defeated." I don't like that attitude and I don't like that part of the fandom.

A fic in which billford happens is just a billford fic. But a fic in which billford happens and also Fidds & Ford's relationship gets explored at some point (and they don't end up together) runs the risk of being, mmm... unwillingly drafted into the army? As if it's taken a "side"?

Or like, a risk of the audience's expectations priming them to misinterpret the fic like "it's Bill vs Fidds, who will win Ford!!" And I'm not interested in that, there's no competition, Bill's relationship with Ford and Fiddleford's relationship with Ford are two completely separate things that have nothing to do with each other, one of them being removed wouldn't impact Ford's relationship with the other.

So along with the most important matters here—characterization, plot, all that good stuff—a subordinate concern I'm juggling is, how do I handle Fidd & Ford's dynamic in such a way that conveys this isn't a fic that's against fiddauthor, it's just a fic where fiddauthor isn't taking place.

As of TBOB I'm convinced that there's a high chance Fiddleford is/was in love with Ford, and Ford's romantically oblivious ass just completely didn't notice it. (And it's very funny.) But, if ever we reach a point in the fic where simultaneously Bill's in love with Ford and Fiddleford's in love with Ford and Ford develops feelings for Bill, it's gonna look like there was a competition and Fidds lost it. (This isn't helped by the fact that Bill would 100% view it like a competition and be the smuggest little shit about "winning," because he's an insecure shit who only feels like he's on top if everyone else has been knocked to the bottom.)

Along with that not being the narrative I want to tell... I also feel like Fidds doesn't deserve that, you know? Just picture it:

You're in love with a dude, you go through hell following this dude around, he inexplicably gets super hostile to you and kicks you out of his life, your life gets ruined over this mess, you later discover he turned hostile because his demonic imaginary friend was shit talking you to him and also said demonic imaginary friend was horrifically abusing the dude you love, thirty years later you're still in love with this dude, you've reconciled with him, you're friends again, he's super remorseful for taking you for granted and is demonstrating more concern for your feelings and needs than he ever has before, and—bam you find out that the dude you love has started dating the abusive demonic imaginary friend.

Can you imagine. Can you fucking imagine. God. If I were him I'd rebuild the memory gun just to make the dude the imaginary friend and me all forget we ever even met each other, fuck this shit, wow.

On the OTHER hand if I went with "hahaha we're just friendly friends who are friends and only friends neither of us ever had any feelings for each other that weren't friend feelings nope" to avoid the appearance of a competition, there's a chance it could still come across like,, "lol fiddauthor loses" just on a meta level rather than an in-fic level. Plus post TBOB I'm not sure if I'd even be able to buy that myself lmao. (Seriously, who the heck makes multiple handmade Christmas gifts for his "colleague" who doesn't even celebrate Christmas and forgets to get anything for his wife, god that kills me.)

It's still a while until I get to the chapters where we dig deep enough into the Fords' relationship that I'll have to make a decision. No matter what, I'm not gonna compromise the ✨integrity of my artistic vision✨ over concerns about potential hypothetical readers' reading comprehension; but like there's more than one way an artistic vision can be expressed, and I'd like to express it in a way that doesn't actively exacerbate the risk of people inserting a narrative I didn't write into my fic.

I want what I write to portray Fiddleford as an old, close, dear friend of Ford's—not as the loser in a love triangle.

[hp-hcs]

🄼🄰🅂🅃🄴🅁🄻🄸🅂🅃

male, nonbinary, & gender-neutral readers x hp characters

NOT UP TO DATE!!!

requests: open! (RULES)

join the taglist!

Do you hate it when you find a fic that says “x reader” only for it to have she/her pronouns, as if it’s some inherent rule that only fem people read fanfiction? WELL DO I HAVE A BLOG FOR YOU.

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。.・゜✭・.

am i reorganizing my masterlist for the 10,000th time? yep! i’ve finally written enough that i need to break this down into tinier masterlists!

key: 🚹 = male reader ⚧️ = nonbinary reader 🚻 = gender-neutral reader

☣️ = yandere tw 💥 = violence tw ‼️ = homophobia/transphobia tw 🩸 = blood/gore tw 🧨 = implied sexual content/sexual innuendos ❤️‍🔥 = smut tw

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

mattheo riddle masterlist

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

theodore nott masterlist

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

polyamorous/non-monogamous masterlist

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

“Splinched” masterlist • theodore nott 🚹🩸

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

“Pansy’s Brother” masterlist • theodore nott 🚹 ☣️ 💥

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

“lipstick” masterlist • enzo berkshire and draco malfoy 🚻 ☣️ ❤️‍🔥

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

“watercolors” masterlist • tom riddle 🚹

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

“The Doll” masterlist • enzo berkshire, regulus black, draco malfoy, theodore nott, mattheo riddle, and blaise zabini 🚻 💥

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

“phoenix tears” masterlist • riddle brothers 🚹 ‼️💥🩸

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

draco malfoy:

the audacity, i can’t believe this 🚹

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

enzo berkshire:

shut up 🚹☣️❤️‍🔥

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

ron weasley:

love triangle 🚹

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

neville longbottom:

mr. green thumb 🚻

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

weasley twins:

common room confessions 🚹

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

blaise zabini:

uniforms ⚧️

fiendfyre 🚹

yandere! blaise zabini headcanons 🚻

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

narcissa malfoy:

yandere! mother! headcanons 🚻 ☣️💥

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

riddle brothers:

June 🚻

crystal 🚻☣️💥 (referenced attempted S/A tw)

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

pansy parkinson:

paralyzer 🚻

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

viktor krum:

sibling rivalry 🚻

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・. .・。✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。✭・.

slytherin boys hcs:

slytherin boys: gn! muggleborn! reader’s music taste is rather…unexpected 🚻

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。.・゜✭・.

random non-reader stories:

key:

❌= implied/referenced child abuse tw 🛑= graphic child abuse tw

“where have you been?”

molly weasley discovers the extent of the dursleys’ abuse ❌

the weasley family and their cinematic adventures

just some funky lil headcanons

Harry Potter and the Amount of Abuse He Suffered at the Hands of His Guardians That Doesn’t Get Mentioned Nearly Enough (aka LET THE POOR BOY BE TRAUMATIZED)

writing prompt: “…jegulus taking in teenage harry after he runs away from the dursleys” 🛑 ❌

untitled tomarry thingy (i just love them okay)

writing prompt: “Touch starved Tom / Voldemort” 🛑 ❌

two thousand words of pure marauders-raise-harry fluff

writing prompt: “regulus black becoming the best seeker ever and harry being his biggest fan and then he finds out that his dad use to date him and he tries (and plots with sirius) to get them back together just so he can call the regulus black his stepdad”

Children Don’t Belong in Cupboards (pt. 1/?)

synopsis: jily comes to the dursleys’ to get their son back 🛑 ❌

.・。.・゜✭・. ☾ ⋆*・。.・゜✭・.

[neowinestainedress]

GLIMPSE OF US ― SERIES

— One day you think you have everything under control, a job, the love of your life, your passions, and your friends, then one day you realize that not everything that shines it’s gold. Fresh out of college and pushed harshly into the real world trying to survive, it’s not easy to deal with life. And between ups and downs, it gets even hard to get a glimpse of the people we know best and love the most. But life’s unpredictable, and after all, it’s a journey made to make new connections and truly discover yourself, and realize that time changes people but that doesn’t mean you have to let them go. Everything will find the place where it belongs.

PAIRINGS: haechan x oc, jaemin x oc, haechan x ex girlfriend!oc, jaemin x haechan's ex girlfriend!oc

GENRE: childhood best friends to lovers, strangers to lovers, exes to lovers, lovers to exes, non-idol au, love triangle (but not really, is more complicated than that), fluff, angst, smut | requested (be careful reading these asks [n2 and n3] bc a lot of things were discussed and might be spoilers!!!)

STATUS: 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐃

PLAYLIST: glimpse of us

MOODBOARDS: the characters | the relationships (will be out when the series is done to avoid spoilers) | pinterest board (the couples' sections contain spoilers)

TAGLIST: comment to be added | general taglist: @froggyforyoongi, @wingsss45, @tddyhyck

CHAPTER ONE ― GENRE: fluff ― SUMMARY: after a year of drying tears, and three of dating, haechan’s ex-girlfriend comes back in their life and hyejin’s biggest fears start growing again. But everything is fine because hyejin and haechan fit right into each other palm. ― WARNINGS: none ― WC: 4k

CHAPTER TWO ― GENRE: fluff, smut ― SUMMARY: jaemin arrives in korea, and he and hyejin immediately get along. But while he tries to settle in, new doubts creep into his mind, keeping him hooked on her relationship with haechan more than he should. ― WARNINGS: smut, oral sex (f receiving), unprotected sex ― WC: +5k

CHAPTER THREE ― GENRE: fluff, slight angst ― SUMMARY: feelings that shouldn’t exist surface after jaemin proposes to do something with hyejin after haechan declined, and things start to get complicated. ― WARNINGS: none ― WC: +5k

CHAPTER FOUR ― GENRE: fluff, slight angst ― SUMMARY: heartfelt conversations are shared, and hyejin can only push her fears away for so long before they jump back at her, making her question if the choices made until now are the right ones. The problem is the new choices might lead down a treacherous path. ― WARNINGS: verbal fight ― WC: +5k

CHAPTER FIVE ― GENRE: fluff, slight angst ― SUMMARY: it’s time to face reality, no matter how painful it is, but hyejin is not sure she is ready for it. ― WARNINGS: none ― WC: 4k

CHAPTER SIX ― GENRE: angst, smut, fluff ― SUMMARY: everything falls apart and putting back the pieces to start brand new is harder than expected. but it’s time to move on and address feelings that have been hiding for too long, but most importantly, try to not mess up another time. ― WARNINGS: angst, smut, alcohol consumption, fing*ring, sq*irting, unprotected s*x, dirty talk, oral s*x, switchy/subby hyuck (no dom/sub dynamics tho), hair pulling, kinda hate s*x (there are unresolved feelings coming out), fingers sucking, handj*b ― WC: +19k

CHAPTER SEVEN ― GENRE: smut, fluff, light angst ― SUMMARY: eventually, everything finds the place where it belongs. ― WARNINGS: smut, public s*x, fingering, h*ndjob, unprotected s*x, oral s*x (f receiving) ― WC: +13k

BONUS

© neowinestaindress; all rights reserved. do NOT repost, modify, or translate any work from this blog on any other platform and claim it as yours. you can find my works on ao3 (neowinestaindress) and wattpad (winestaintedress_; currently inactive).

[ranchthoughts]

Another Update on the GMMTV Kissing Multiverse

Hello everyone! Back again with another update on the GMMTV Kissing Multiverse.

The first version is here, second version here.

EDIT: New update is here, the tag for future updates is here.

Rules

Must have visible lip to lip contact

Must be shown on screen in a GMMTV tv series (no kisses from ads, promotional content, etc.)

Breakdown by Show

I have analyzed 61 shows so far:

(full list in alt text)

Breakdown By Actor

I have analyzed 112 actors so far:

(full lists in alt text)

Results and Discussion

Most Kissing Pairs Per Show

The shows with the most different kissing pairs are:

Warp Effect (15 different pairs)

Friendzone (11 different pairs)

U-Prince (9 different pairs)

The Player and The Jungle (7 different pairs each)

Only Friends (5 different pairs)

Not Me and 3 Will Be Free have 4 each, then Mama Gogo, Moonlight Chicken, P.S. I Hate You, Theory of Love, and Three Gentlebros have 3 different kissing pairs each.

The Power of Jojo

As discovered in the first iteration, Jojo has an outsized impact on the number of kissing pairs.

He directed roughly 13% of all the shows analyzed but his shows contain about 33% of kisses present in the data set. Jojo also directed 4 of the top 6 shows with the most different kissing pairs (and 6 of the top 13).

The median number of "different kissing pairs per show" of a Jojo show is 6.0, compared to a median of only 1.8 "different kissing pairs per show" in non-Jojo shows.

(note: I am just looking at kissing pair iterations here not at unique kissing pairs, e.g., Phuwin/Pond are a pair in two shows (once in a Jojo show and once in a non-Jojo show), so they are counted twice.)

Most Kissing Partners

There has been a shift in the rankings... Welcome Joss to the top!

Top ranked are Joss with 10 different kissing partners, then Lee and Namtan with 9 different kissing partners each, then Ohm and Nanon with 7 each.

Next are Gigie and Singto with 6 kissing partners each, then Bright, Film, First, Fluke Pusit, Jan, Krist, Mild, New, and Off with 5 each. Finally, Drake, Fah, Neo, Plustor, Tay, and Win have 4 each.

The average number of kissing partners per actor is 2.3.

Most Kissing Partners in One Show

We have four people tied for "Most Kissing Partners in One Show," and they are from only two different shows. A round of applause for Plustor (4 different kissing partners in Friendzone) and for Fluke Pusit, Gigie, and New (each with 4 different kissing partners in Warp Effect)!

Honorable mentions to: Joss (3 in The Player AND 3 in 3 Will Be Free), Namtan (3 in The Player), Neo (3 in Only Friends), and Singto (3 in Friendzone).

Please note all of these shows are Jojo shows.

The Kiss Web

Behold... the Kiss Web:

I made this to better visualize the intertwined who-kisses-who situation going on. It's, uh... a lot.

I also made some fun visual breakdowns to help sort through the mess of the Web:

First image below highlights "kissing triangles" and "squares" (shout out to the 3 Will Be Free trio of Joss, Mild, and Tay; the Friendzone trio of Nat, Plustor, and Singto; and the Warp Effect triangle of Fluke Pusit, Gigie, and New and square of Fah, Gigie, Joong, and New, all of which were established over the course of one show each - yes these are all Jojo shows).

The second image highlights the reach of the top 5 kissers.

The third image shows the incredible kissing webs of Warp Effect (in red) and Friendzone (in blue), the two shows with the most kissing pairs.

Unique vs. Repeat Kissing Pairs

The vast majority of kissing pairs only occur once, in one show. There are 136 "unique" kissing pairs in the data set, with 128 (94%) only appearing once, in one show, and 8 (6%) pairs appearing at least twice.

The 8 pairs that appear in more than one show are:

Book/Force (in A Boss and A Babe, Enchante, and Only Friends)

Bright/Win (in 2gether and Still 2gether)

Dunk/Joong (in Hidden Agenda and Star In My Mind)

Earth/Mix (in A Tale of Thousand Stars, Cupid's Last Wish, and Moonlight Chicken)

Film/Gun (in Not Me and Three Gentlebros)

First/Khaotung (in The Eclipse and Only Friends)

Gun/Off (in Not Me and Theory of Love)

Louis/Neo (in The Eclipse and Fish Upon The Sky)

All these pairs, with the exception of Film/Gun, are BL branded pairs, which says something about the variety of the het GMMTV show world and about the structure of the BL system.

All in all, 99% of mixed gender pairs only appear once, in one show, compared to 88% of same gender pairs.

Same Gender vs. Mixed Gender Kissing Pairs

A change in the data! With all the new kisses we've gotten in, the balance has shifted. Of the 136 "unique" (non-repeated) kissing pairs, 59% are mixed gender pairs and 41% are same gender pairs.

Last time we were at 59% same gender kisses and 41% mixed gender kisses, but our sample includes more het shows now which explains the shift.

I dug into this a little further by looking at how many shows featured both same and mixed gender kissing pairs, and which shows featured only one or the other.

43% of the shows had only same gender kissing pairs, 39% of the shows had only mixed gender kissing pairs, and only 18% of shows featured both. All in all, a fairly even split.

I was curious so I did the math - about 34% of the 112 actors I looked at have only ever kissed someone of the same gender. Of that 34%, roughly 32% have kissed more than one person of the same gender (representing about 11% of the full sample).

And now, some burning questions...

Which of the GMMTV boys has kissed the most guys?

We have a five-way tie for first place: congrats to First, Fluke Pusit, Neo, Plustor, and Singto, with 4 men kissed each!

First kissed Gawin (Not Me), Khaotung (The Eclipse and Only Friends), Mix (Moonlight Chicken), and Ohm (The Shipper)

Fluke Pusit kissed Jay Jatuporn (Warp Effect), New (Warp Effect), Ohm Thipakorn (A Boss and A Babe), and Thor (Warp Effect)

Neo kissed Drake (Only Friends), Force (Only Friends), Louis (Fish Upon The Sky and The Eclipse), and Mark Pakin (Only Friends)

Plustor kissed AJ (Friendzone), Arm (Friendzone), Nat (Friendzone), and Singto (Friendzone) [he was very busy in Friendzone]

Singto kissed Krist (SOTUS), Nat (Friendzone), Ohm (HCTM), and Plustor (Friendzone)

Second place is a five-way tie between Earth, Gawin, Khaotung, Krist, and Ohm who have kissed 3 men each!

There are also 13 men who have kissed two men each: Chimon, Dunk, Force, Gun, Mek, Mix, Nat, New, Papang, Pawin, Phuwin, Pod, and Tay.

*Note: while First and Fluke Pusit appear together in The Shipper, and it gets verrrry close, they do not actually kiss.

Where does Only Friends stand so far?

Only Friends itself is at 5 kissing pairs so far, which is higher than average but only 5th place overall among shows. I believe it can claw its way up easily though (it only needs two more kissing pairs to catch 4th places The Jungle and The Player)!

First has had 5 kissing partners so far which means he's only 2 away from reaching the top 5 Kissers (Joss has 10 kissing partners, Lee and Namtan have 9 each, Nanon and Ohm have 7 each). Neo is at 4 kissing partners, so also within reach of the top if he puts some effort in. Khaotung is at 3 partners, so within reach of the upper echelon but maybe more of a stretch. Force and Mark Pakin are at a respectable 2 partners each so far but Book has only had one kissing partner so he is going to need to kiss a lot to make up some ground. Lookjun is at 2 so she has room to move too.

In terms of gay kisses, First and Neo are already at the top of the leader board with 4 men kissed each, while Khaotung sits in respectable second place with 3 men kissed. All three have a strong chance of moving up the standings (Neo is averaging 1 new kissing partner a week so let's see if that continues). Force has kissed two men so he is not far off either. Mark Pakin and Book have only kissed one man each and thus they are far down the leader board for GMMTV men who have kissed men, but I remain optimistic.

Contributing authors:

@airenyah, @alsoran, @alwaysthepessimist, various anons, @bengiyo, @burnsuncomet, @callipigio, @cangse-sanren, @catboykacchan, @catboyjosten, @catsundmaus, @chickenstrangers, @crowie, @dribs-and-drabbles, @ffirstkhao, @isaksbestpillow, @jeonghanurl, @kattahj, @kpinhiding, @lurkingshan, @maibpenrai, @maybeitdontmakesense, @nieves-de-sugui, @non-binarypal7, @sammie-lightwood-bane, @sollucets, @userneos, @theselightsareblinding, @tiistirtipii, @waitmyturtles, @williamrikers

Data visualization consultants: @chickenstrangers, @wen-kexing-apologist

Asked to be tagged: @blmpff

[smoooothoperator]

untouchable

19: Beautiful Things

Lando Norris x OC (Violet Sinclair)

same group friend, unrequited love, acquittances to lovers, ski trip, love triangle, life as lovers

Words: 5.6k (oooops)

Warnings: fluff (a little), angst, drama, crash, hopital

a/n: THE chapter!!!!!!! Let me know what were your theories about this chapter!

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Every way of feedback is very welcomed

The last few years I wasn't the best version of myself. I barely recognized myself when I looked at the mirror, not knowing what I did to look like that. It was like I couldn't control myself, being the victim of unfair and unjustified critics and hate, and making them get into my mind and believe every word they said about me.

For years I was under a fog that made my mind not perform well, and even if I had people that could help me, I never knew how to get rid of it.

Until I met her.

She was like a breath of fresh air every time she walked into a room. Her golden hair was the reminder of the sunlight as well as her blue eyes that stared deep into my soul whenever she looked at me. She was the pure incarnation of an angel.

I tried to be better. I tried to make her look at me, to have her attention and be the cause of her smile and happiness.

But she was always with someone else. She was out of reach. Untouchable.

For four years I dreamed of having her, I imagined a life with her next to me. Four warm summers and four cold winters.

Until it happened. 

She looked at me. I had her attention. I was the reason behind her smile. I was the person that could hold her. 

Thanks to her I freed myself from my tormenting, from my negative thoughts. She was the reason why I wanted to be better every morning. Thanks to her, I could face everything with a smile, I could go to my family and talk with them about myself without avoiding questions about work. And the best is that my parents loved Violet as a daughter.

“Lando!”

Would she like it big? Or maybe small? There are many sizes and forms. And what would she like more. Silver? Gold? Rose gold? 

“Hey, you deaf muppet!”

I look up from my phone, finding Violet running towards me with her hand in a fist holding something.

“What is it?” I laughed looking at her, watching her sit on the sun bed.

“I just found this conch shell, look!” she smiled, placing it in the palm of my hand, making me smile when I felt her cold fingers from the water.

After the triple header, Violet and I decided to spend the first week of the summer break on our own, staying in Monaco for some days to relax before going with my family to Greece.

“It's so beautiful” I smiled looking at her, holding her hand and kissing her wrist. “How is the water?”

“Really nice” she nodded. “Come on, come with me”

I smiled and nodded, leaving my phone in the backpack and holding her hand while we walked towards the water. 

When I started going out with her, I discovered that her love language was the same as mine, but she struggled to show it. Maybe it was because of her previous relationship, that made her be cautious about touching another man, but once I earned her trust, I discovered a whole new world with her.

Violet is a woman that loves talking about what she likes. Thanks to her I learned so many things about culture and different languages, and discovered new things and places I never imagined I would love. 

“Come here” I smile, opening my arms while floating so she could come close to me and wrap her legs around my hips. 

She smiled and rested her head on my shoulder, floating together. This was our first summer together, completely alone. 

“What were you looking at on your phone earlier? You were really focused on it and barely heard me calling you from the water” she whispered softly.

“Oh, I just read the contract for the reservation of the yacht for Greece” I lied, smiling, hoping she would believe it. 

“Is the same one from last summer?” she gasped, excited. 

“Yeah” I laughed.

“God, I loved that yacht! It's so big and spacious!” she smiled. “Well, except the bed I had last year, but it was fine”

“Well, you are lucky to share a bed with me now, huh?” I smirked. 

“I repeat. I won't do anything if your family is around, you perv” she laughed, splashing water on my face. 

Violet is a blessing. She is the type of person that when you meet her for the first time, she always tries to stay distant and quiet. I still can remember the first time I met her, sitting on the couch of my house and looking at everyone while we talked, like analyzing us and trying to read us. But since I started dating her, I discovered a new side of her and why she was like that with us.

And like with everything bad that has been happening lately, the answer to that behavior was Harry. 

“A thought for a thought?” she whispered against my neck. “I can hear your mind working”

“It's just…” I sighed, holding her closer to me. “I'm so grateful for these six months with you. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night thinking that everything was a dream, but then I look at my side and you are there, sleeping tenderly like a baby. And I swear I thank God every day for sending you my way that day four years ago”

I felt her move her face and look at me, leaning closer until our lips melted on a kiss. It was salty, but that didn't stop me from smiling and kissing her back when she held me closer too.

“This is not a dream” she whispered before pulling away. “This is real. My love for you is real”

I smile and kiss her lips again and again, not getting tired of the feeling of her lips on mine.

“And what were you thinking?” I asked her, kissing her cheek.

“Promise me you won't laugh” she smiled, poking my cheek.

“Is it funny?” I laughed looking at her, watching her shake her head with her cheeks tinted in red. 

“No, no, it's…” she smiled, taking a deep breath. “Well, I was thinking about stopping the rent of my apartment ”

“What? Why? You love that apartment” I frown, tilting my head to the side. 

“Yeah, but… I think I want to take the next step with you” she smiled looking into my eyes. “You've been living with me since you asked me six months ago, and even if you come on go, your things are still in the wardrobe and your toothbrush is still next to mine. I just think that the next natural step for us is having our names in a contract of owners of a property and living together… What do you think?”

I looked at her surprised. I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, living together in a house and hopefully having kids around, maybe a dog too. 

“Remember what we talked about the day after Christmas?” I said, smiling. 

“That hypothetical question?” she laughed softly, nodding. “Yeah, I remember”

“That they I asked you, hypothetically, if you wanted a house like the one my parents own. With enough space for kids and lots of rooms” I said, cupping her cheek and feeling how she rested her head on my hand. “I told you that day I said that we were in the perfect age to settle down…”

“And you said that you wanted to think about the future” she ended for me, nodding. “And I do. I do want to think about the future with you. I want to settle down with you. I do want to look at houses in our free time and plan things with you”

I smiled looking at and nodded, happily. This is getting so real, so true.

And for once, I prayed to every God that exists to never take her away from me, never. I would rather die than lose her.

“My only condition is to have a room for my books” she smiled, biting her lip. 

“Anything you want, babe” I smiled, kissing her.

Back in my apartment here in Monaco I went to my setup room, sitting on the chair and looking at the screen of my phone, going through the same website I was looking at on the beach.

Some people might say that it's too soon, that we are young and have a long life ahead of us. But what is always in my mind is the thought of a forever with her, of taking every step of a relationship that leads to the next stages. Why wouldn't I look for something like this when I know that she is the one for me? Why would I have to wait when the answer is right in front of me?

“Love, are you going to stream?” I heard her ask, making me turn around and see her leaning against the door frame.

“No, why?” I said smiling, getting out the website from my phone and locking it. 

“Oh, well, I was just wondering if you wanted to look for houses now. Just for fun, of course” she said, coming towards me and standing between my legs.

“Why don't we make some snacks before that, hm?” I smiled, placing my hands on the back of her legs, looking up at her. 

She smiled and nodded, leaning to press a tender kiss on my forehead before she took a step back while I got up from the chair. 

Violet and I move in a perfect synchrony when we are in the kitchen, or when we work. We know what we have to do, where we have to stand so we don't disturb the other. It's like I can hear her voice in my mind telling me what to do, where to go.

Once the plates with our snacks were ready, we walked to the streaming room, sitting on the chairs. While I searched on the internet some websites that had houses to sell, I saw her getting up and going to get the backpack she left in the living room, coming back with her notebook and a pen.

“First we should write what we want in a house, right?” she said, smiling. 

“Wait” I said, placing my hand on her knee. “Like… are you being completely serious about this? Like, for real? You really really want to buy a house? I mean, we can look for an apartment until we think that it's not enough…”

“Lando, I want a house” she said. “With you. I guess if we are going to go through this we have to talk about, well… more mature things”

I took a deep breath and nodded, turning the chair to face her, holding both of her hands. I smiled looking at them, looking at the ring with our stones placed in her right middle finger, the wrist watch that matches mine after a sponsor sent them for us, the bracelet that is the twin of the one I have and a bracelet Eloise gifted her some years ago and she wanted to put it again. I rubbed her knuckles and looked into her eyes, searching for the courage to ask what was on the tip of my tongue.

“You want kids?” I asked her. 

“I think so, yeah” she nodded, blushing. “I mean… I see the way you are with Mila and Athena, or with Magnussen’s daughter. And I have these dreams at night when I can see you holding her, holding a little girl with your curls and my blonde hair”

“Why did you never tell me that?” I smile softly, squeezing her hands. “That's so beautiful, Violet”

“Because I didn't know how you would react” she said, shrugging her shoulders. “Like, what if you don't want kids? What if you are comfortable with just the two of us? Less people to worry about, you know?”

“Well, I do want kids” I smiled. “God, I want it all, Violet. I want to get married with you, I want to have kids with you. Can we have a dog? Or maybe a cat. Or both! But, the thing is… I want everything”

“Then the mature talk is done” she smiled. “We are in the same page”

I bit my lip and nodded, pulling her hands to my lips and kissing her fingers one by one, smiling.

Is this what it feels like to have a soulmate? To have someone you are in complete synchrony, not only with how you coexist but with the way you think. We know what we want, and it feels amazingly beautiful.

But somehow this makes my fear of losing her even bigger. The thought of losing all it's inevitable.

The day we came back to London was sunny.  Max and Pietra came to pick us up at the airport because we wanted to have dinner together, ordering some takeout. 

Lando wanted to make a stream with Max in the improvised setup he made in my office, so while they stayed in that room, Pietra and I were on the couch talking.

“I told him about the house subject” I said smiling, looking at how Pietra opened her eyes with a big smile.

“No way! That's amazing!” she smiled. “So are you two for real? Like, forever?”

“I guess so, we had that talk too. The kids and marriage one” I said blushing. “It went really good”

“God, I'm so proud of you two” she said, hugging me. 

“It has only been half a year, but I swear it feels more than that” I sighed.

“Yeah, that happens when you are with the right person” she nodded. “You feel that you know him since forever and that you were together for longer because all the experiences and memories”

I smile and nod, taking a deep breath. We talked about some more things until I received a call from the restaurant where we ordered our dinner.

“God damn it, they don't have enough drivers to deliver it at time” I sighed, rubbing my temple. “I guess I have to go pick it up myself”

“Oh, I can go with you if you want to?” Pietra said, standing up.

“No, don't worry” I smiled, shaking my hands. “I’ll be fast”

I sighed and walked with her towards my office, opening the door a little and walking towards the setup, placing my hand on Lando's shoulder.

“I have to go pick up the dinner” I sighed.

“Oh? It happened again?” he frowned, wrapping his hand around my leg. 

“Unfortunately” I groaned. “Remind me to never order at that restaurant at this hour. It seems that everyone had the same idea of us”

“Yeah” he sighed. “You can take my car, it's parked in front of the building”

“You are the best” I smiled, leaning on him and kissing his cheek.

I walked out of the room and grabbed my bag, putting my wallet on it and grabbing the keys of his Audi. I always loved this car, how comfortable it is and easy to drive, and even if it was big and hard to find a parking spot for it, I wouldn't care.

I put music on the Bluetooth, listening to my playlist and singing along with it. The restaurant is not too far, only fifteen minutes away with traffic, and since it was late and the people that got out of work were already at home, the road was pretty empty.

So I let the engine roar a little, speeding on empty roads and feeling the adrenaline of hearing it mixed with the music of the speakers.

But silly me, I didn't notice the brakes starting to fail.

I hummed softly the music, watching how the traffic light went red so I pressed the foot on the brake pedal.

But the car wasn't stopping. The brakes weren't working.

“What the…” I frown, pressing again, feeling a shiver running up my back and already feeling cold sweat. “No, no, no!”

It happened so fast. My brain was working too fast and before I knew it I was jumping the red light, praying that the path ahead was clear and any car came into the intersection.

But my dose of luck was empty. I have had too many good things lately. 

Before I could understand what was happening, a white light blinded me as well as the sound of a horn coming closer to me. 

I felt the hit on my side and after that everything started to go slower, making me not hear the metal and glass of the car breaking. I felt my whole body in pain, the cuts of the glass in my face as well as in my arms, my side was terribly in pain. And what was worse, the pain in my nape and head.

Before I noticed the car stopping, I slowly passed out, nauseous because of the pain all over my body.

I didn't look at the time, not knowing how much it was taking Violet to come back. I knew she loved the Audi, so she was probably driving around to have fun and spend time alone with her music.

“Lando, you know where Violet is?” 

I frowned and turned the chair, looking at Pietra. She was looking at her phone with worry in her eyes.

“She said she went to pick up the dinner” I said, looking at my phone, swallowing thickly when I saw that it was already half an hour ago.

“Maybe she went for a ride” Max said chuckling, looking at me and then at the camera of the stream. “This man made Violet a fan of speed”

“Hey, no” I laughed, hitting his arm. “She always loved to drive, and thanks to me she had the chance of driving my McLaren”

“No way! Did you let her drive it before me?” Max gasped, making me laugh harder. “How dare you?!”

“She's my girlfriend and I trust her with my own life” I said. 

“Unfair”

I laugh and shake my head. We kept streaming a little longer until I received a call from Violet's phone.

“Violet! I know you love the Audi but we are really hungry” I smiled, looking at Max and Pietra.

“Are you related to Violet Sinclair?” 

I frown, somehow feeling a shiver when I heard the voice of a stranger through my phone.

“Y-yeah” I mumbled, ignoring the fact that I was on a stream when my whole face went pale. 

“I’m Captain Garrick from London's Fire Department. We found Miss Sinclair's phone and wallet in the ruins of a car crash. She was sent with urgency to the Royal London Hospital due to the critical conditions after the crash”

I just couldn't understand what I was hearing. Violet? In a crash? What?

“Lando?” 

I swallow thickly, looking at Max. He frowned looking at me, worried. We were still in the stream, and I could hear the notifications mixed with a whistle that was making me feel nauseous.

“End the stream” I mumbled, getting up and pacing around the room.

Violet. Car crash. Critical conditions.

Those were the words that kept flying in my mind like a mantra. 

Violet. Car crash. Critical conditions. Violet. Car crash. Critical conditions. Violet. Car crash. Critical conditions.

“Lando!”

When I felt Max’s hand on my shoulder I flinched, gasping. 

“She…”

“Who called? It was Violet? Your face changed when you answered the call” Max sighed, looking at me.

“Car crash” I said, feeling a knot in my throat and my vision getting blurry as seconds passed. “She was… she is in critical conditions, they said”

“What?!” Max and Pietra gasped.

“I need to go” I said, burying my fingers in my hair. “I have to go”

“We are going” Pietra said quickly, grabbing her things and looking at us. “We won't leave you alone like this. Where did they take her?”

“Royal London Hospital” I mumbled, watching them walk around me, grabbing things.

I felt the panic coming to my system. The fear I tried to fight over the last months, I could feel it coming closer, like a predator breathing in my nap. My chest was heavy, I could barely breathe.

Max sighed, wrapping his hand around my wrist, making me come back to Earth and walk behind him, following him to his car.

“She will be okay” Pietra said, looking back at me with a sad and nervous smile. “Violet is strong, and stubborn. It's not easy to get rid of her, huh?”

I couldn't answer, my eyes were fixed in my hands, looking at the bracelet of my wrist and feeling how the metal of it burned my skin. 

I can't lose her. There's no way this is real. This can't be happening. 

Why? Why are they doing this to me? I prayed to every God, I promised to every one of them that I would love her with all my heart, that I would never hurt her, and this is how they answered me? By making her be on a limbo between life and death? Why is this so unfair?

“We arrived” I heard Max say, stopping the car after finding a parking lot.

I took a deep breath and pressed my hands on my eyes, trying to calm down. I won't help Violet by feeling this way. I have to be strong for her.

I got out of the car and ran following them, going through the door of the emergency department and stopping in front of the receptionist table.

“V-Violer Sinclair?” I asked, trying to calm down my breathing and heartbeat. “Did she arrive? Where is she?”

“Are you related to her?” the woman behind the desk asked calmly, making my blood boil because of how disinterested she sounded. “Only familiars can have the information of her state”

“I'm her emergency contact. Of course I'm fucking related to her!” I exclaimed. “Where is she?!”

“Lando…” Pietra sighed, placing her hand on my arm. “He is her boyfriend, we are her friends. Her family is not in London, we are the only people she has. We need to know where she is, please”

I saw the woman look at us, scanning every one of us with her eyes as she chewed a gum and then her eyes scanned the screen of her computer while pressing keys on the keyboard.

“For Gods sake!” I exclaimed, taking a step back. 

“Lando, calm down, please” Max sighed.

“She's in the surgery room” the woman said. “Third floor”

I swallow thickly and look around, searching for an elevator and going to it with Max and Pietra. When we got inside of it, I could hear my heartbeat inside of my ears.

“She's going to be okay, don't worry” Pietra said.

“She's in surgery, Pietra… This is not okay. I know what a crash is. I know when a crash is safe and when it's not. I had plenty of them and never ended up at the surgery table” I mumble with a thin voice. 

“She wasn't driving at 300 km per hour, mate. I'm sure it's nothing, okay? Maybe a few cuts or broken ribs… The normal after a crash” he said, trying to calm me.

I just nodded, letting out a long, trembling sigh. 

She has to be okay. I need her to be okay. We talked about many things about our future, we have to make them come true.

When the doors opened we rushed out of it, walking fast through the corridors as we found the waiting room from the surgery department. I took a deep breath and looked around, finding another reception desk.

“I'll go” Pietra said, walking away from us.

“This can't be happening” I whisper, looking at how she talked with the receptionist. “This is not real”

“I'm sorry, Lando…” Max sighed, placing his hand on my back, guiding me to sit on the free chairs.

“I… God. We even talked about buying a house together” I said, laughing sadly and resting my head in my hands. “About marriage and kids. The other was looking for an engagement ring for her before she smsiad she wanted to.move in with me. God damn it!”

Max sighed and rubbed my back, resting his back on the chair.

“She will get through this, Lando. I swear” he whispered. “She loves you, she has a strong soul. She will fight”

I closed my eyes when I felt the tears burning them, letting them flow. I can't lose her.

“She’s in the surgery room number 5” Pietra said, sitting next to me and placing her hand next to Max's in my back. “A doctor will come to talk with you soon, the surgery is close to finishing”

I nodded and rubbed my face, sniffling. 

I waited and waited. It was an eternal wait, looking up every time I heard the doors opening and a doctor calling the family of their patient. It was a torture, hearing people sighing relieved after receiving good news and others crying in agony after receiving bad news. And I couldn't help but wonder what would be mine. Good news or bad ones? If I receive bad news, what should I do? What is the process? I should call her family, right? What are they going to do then? What am I going to do? 

“Family of Violet Sinclair?”

I looked up gasping, getting up fast and walking towards the man that called me. He is young, probably just the extra help or a resident of surgery that takes care of talking with the family. 

“I'm her boyfriend” I mumbled, nervously. “H-how is she?” Is she…?”

“She's alive” he said, nodding. “When she came, she had multiple broken ribs  and some of them punctured her right lung. Thankfully, we managed to fix it as well as the dislocated shoulder” he explained, making me sigh relieved and feeling a weight leaving my shoulders. “She's stable, but we had to induce her on a coma due to the damage in her head, so we expect her to heal on her own but she will wake up probably in a week”

A week. A whole week.

“Thank you” I nodded, swallowing the sob that wanted to escape. “Thank you so much, doctor. I owe you everything”

“We will send her to the ICU, you can visit her as soon as she's installed there” he said. 

“What… What can I do to help her heal? Is there a way?” I asked. 

“Talk with her” he smiled weakly. “They say that patients in coma can hear us. Talking with her and making her know that you are there with her will make her heal, I'm sure”

I swallow thickly and nod, feeling a wave of so many emotions hitting me. Relief, happiness, nervousness. I took a deep breath and walked away towards Max and Pietra, but looking at the family that received bad news recently.

“Well? How did it go?” Max asked worriedly.

“She's alive” I whisper, sighing with relief. “But in a coma”

“Oh, fuck…” Pietra sighed, biting her nails. “And then? What are you going to do?”

“Well, I'm going to stay with her” I said without doubting it. “I have to call my parents and tell them to go on the trip without us. And I have to grab some clean clothes for her… Oh, and reserve her a VIP, I really don't want fans around if there are rumors”

“I'll go grab her clothes” Pietra said. *Don't worry about it. Stay with her”

“I highly doubt that your family will go on the trip knowing what happened, Lando” Max sighed. 

“I know” I sighed. “I know, I know…”

I took a deep breath and closed. For a moment I thought I lost her forever. For a moment I thought I lost everything before even having it. And this made me realize how much Violet means to me, more than I thought. She is my present and my future, the person that owes my heart, the one that is my other half. And I can't live without it, I can't live without Violet.

“Look, they are taking her to the ICU” Max said, patting my knee and making me look up. “Go with her, okay?”

I nodded and stood up, taking a deep breath and looking at them. I immediately hugged them tightly, taking a deep breath, and both of them hugged me even more tightly. 

“Everything is going to be okay, yeah?” Max whispered. “Be strong for her, she will need it”

I took a deep breath and nodded, hiding my face on his neck and then I pulled away. They looked at me with a sad smile and red eyes filled with tears. Never in my life I imagined we could experience something like this.

“Give me the key to her apartment” Pietra said. “I’ll grab clothes for her and then we'll come back, okay?”

“You don't have to” I sighed. “Come tomorrow morning, yeah? You don't have to spend the night here, I'll do it”

They smiled weakly and nodded. I grabbed the keys from the pocket of my hoodie and handed them to Pietra. I don't even remember when I put them in there, probably it was without knowing it.

I watched them walk away, Max wrapping his arm around Pietra while they talked in whispers. I owe them everything for taking me here, for making sure I didn't break down.

“We took Miss Sinclair to the ICU” the doctor that talked with me earlier said behind me. “You can go with her. This way”

I looked at the young man, walking behind him as he guided me to the ICU. But before he opened the doors, he turned around and looked at me.

“I have to warn you” he said, smiling weakly. “What you will see might scare you. The ICU is not quiet at all, there are machines making sounds all the time. She has wires on her chest so we can rate her heartbeat, so you'll hear it. There's a tube in her mouth so the machine can breathe for her while she's unconscious. We put a cervical collar around her neck because of the hit she had in the crash. Her face is bruised and with cuts. But the most important thing is that she is alright, okay?”

“Y-yeah” I nodded, swallowing thickly and feeling how every word he said about her condition made my heart break more and more. “Thank you”

He smiled weakly and nodded, opening the door and guiding me to the box where she stays. 

I tried to not gasp, to not scream broken when I saw her. This was something I never wanted to see before. And unfortunately here I am, watching the love of my life connected to machines that are keeping her alive while I hear her heartbeat and her breathing.

“I'll leave you two alone” the doctor said. “If you want, I can ask the nurses to bring you a blanket so you can stay the night with her”

I couldn't talk, so I nodded. He walked out of the box, leaving us alone. 

“Oh, Violet…” I mumble, grabbing the chair and placing it next to her bed. “My beautiful, beautiful Violet…”

I tried so hard to not let the need to cry win. I tried so hard on keeping the tears back in my eyes. But it's so hard, and I’m so tired. 

“How” I whisper, feeling my voice cracking as I speak, barely watching my hand holding hers because of the tears blurring my eyes. “How could something like this happen to you? Who did this to you, love… Why you?”

I took a deep breath and brought her hand to my lips, letting the tears flow. 

I promised her I would always come back after every race, that I would be safe and go back to her. But karma is so unfair and what she was scared of what could happen to me, it happened to her. 

“I'm here now, baby” I whisper, pressing soft kisses on her hand. “If you hear me, don’t be afriad, okay? I'm here. Everything is okay, we can get through this. I will stay here, waiting to see your beautiful eyes opening again and then after that I will take care of you, I don't care if I have to miss some races. I will never leave your side, you come first, always. You are my first priority”

What should I do now? I have to call my family and tell them what happened… Would Violet want me to call her family? She told me they only care about her when they need her… Should I call Zak and tell him that I doubt I'll be ready for the first race after the summer break? And the fans… I'm sure they made edits if the stream, of how I answered the call and how I ended it abruptly.

“God… I think we are going to be trending topic” I sighed rubbing my forehead. “What should I do? I'm sure there are going to be news of the crash and they would recognize my car, should I tsay something about it? I'm so lost without you, Violet… You are the brain of the two of us. The smart one.”

Someone, help me get out of this nightmare. 

taglist

@elisysd @racinggirl @ninifee1802 @kakorrhaphiphobia @landoyesrizz @lorarri @bellwhysomean @leptitlu @aphroditeisamilf @brekkers-whore @copper-boom @sideboobrry11 @alltoomaples @f1madison @elijahslover @silkenthusiasts @chonkybonky @summerslike11 @randomgirlnumber-13 @is-just-a @whentheautumnleavesfall @malynn @mycenterfold @barackosteaa @izzy-marvel @ssprayberrythings @ophcelia @traveling-inspiration

[honeybeefae]

For the First Time In Forever…

I feel like writing again! I’ve missed you all so much and am so thankful for all of your love and support and kind words and just your existence! You are all amazing!

To celebrate, and because I’m wanting to ease myself back into writing as I am afraid I’m severely out of practice, I’m posting some prompts below that I would love for you all to look over and choose! Any character you want, any scenario, and you can combine!

I don’t know if I will get to all of them and as a forewarning, most of them will probably somewhat short, but I will do my best! I also want to extend this offer to the Baldurs Gate 3 fandom as that game has been my saving grace for awhile! But ACOTAR is very much accepted as well!

I love you guys and can’t wait to write again for you! ❤️

Prompts

Angst:

1.) “Don’t lie to me. I know everything”

2.) “I don’t love you.”

3.) “Please don’t do this.”

4.) “I can’t believe I fell in love with you.”

5.) “Don’t make this harder than it has to be.”

6.) “Us? There never was such a thing.”

7.) “You think I would fall in love with someone like you?”

8.) “You don’t deserve me.”

9.) “You….you cheated on me?”

10.) “Don’t leave me, please, I still need you.”

11.) “What do you want me to say?”

12.) “You promised!”

13.) “Stop pretending this wasn’t your plan all along, to break me down until I’m nothing.”

14.) “You can’t do this.”

15.) “I hate you.”

Fluff:

1.) “Can I hug you?”

2.) “You’re everything to me.”

3.) “Surely you know how much I care about you?”

4.) “Come for a cuddle?”

5.) “You’re so oblivious, aren’t you?”

6.) “Stay with me tonight. Please.”

7.) “I love you.”

8.) “Can I keep you?.”

9.) “Come on, I wouldn’t forget your birthday!”

10.) “I’ve never seen someone so beautiful.”

11.) “I never thought I’d see you again…”

12.) “Come dance in the rain with me!”

13.) “May I have this dance?”

14.) “Will you marry me?”

15.) “I want to show you something.”

Tropes:

1.) Enemies to Lovers

2.) Friends to Lovers

3.) Strangers to Lovers

4.) Soulmates

5.) AU

6.) Amnesia

7.) Marriage of Convenience

8.) Lovers to Enemies

9.) Forbidden Love

10.) Fake Dating

11.) Second Chances

12.) Damsel in Distress

13.) Stuck Together

14.) Opposites Attract

15.) Love Triangle

Smut:

1.) “I want to fuck you so badly.”

2.) “You can take it, pretty girl, can’t you?”

3.) “Mine.”

4.) “On your knees.”

5.) “Submission looks good on you.”

6.) “You look so pretty with my cum painted on your face.”

7.) “Please let me cum inside you, please, I need to breed you.”

8.) “Beg.”

9.) “Someone’s been bad.”

10.) “Don’t you want an audience?”

11.) “Use your words.”

12.) “Such a fucking brat, you should know your place by now but it seems I’ll have to remind you.”

13.) “Do you know how much I’ve been wanting to do this to you?”

14.) “No more, I can’t take anymore.”

15.) “Swallow.”

Scenarios:

1.) One person is injured

2.) One person is sick

3.) One bed trope

4.) Pregnancy

5.) First Date

6.) Wedding/Reception

7.) First night together

8.) Truth or Dare

9.) Forced proximity

10.) One person discovers their secret

11.) Meet cute

12.) Accidentally hurting the other

13.) Hurt/Comfort

14.) Confessions

15.) Breakup

[butcherlarry]

Weekly Fic Recs 58

This week's fic recs! Also! I am going to try out posting these lists on Saturday instead of Sunday starting next week. If it works out, I'll probably stick with that schedule then (barring travel/holidays/other unexpected shenanigans). Anyway, onto the fics!

a sky of honey by TheResurrectionist - Superbat, complete. The omegaverse mpreg Bruce fic! This part is done!! And it's sooooo gooood!!!! The gala chapter was everything I hoped for and more, especially the Clark and Lex scenes :) If you've been waiting to read this fic until it was no longer a wip, here's your chance! Do it now! And check out the art januariat has been making along the way!!

the trials and tribulations of fatherhood by InkpotSprite - Batfam, complete. Dick, Jason, and Tim argue who was the worst kid growing up. Bruce is so, so done with everything.

The Bruce Wayne-Batman Feud Theory by inabsurd - Batfam, complete. Bernard releases a conspiracy theory out onto the world that Bruce and Batman hate each other. Shenanigans ensue.

"Whatcha Got There?" "A Smoothie." Colourized by TheWitchBoy - Batfam, complete. Bruce gets deaged into a baby. The bat kids take care of him until he gets reaged. Shenanigans ensue.

(Love) Triangles Have Multiple Centers by frozenpotions - Superbat, wip. More identity porn shenanigans! Clark is feeling better after getting hit with Kryptonite! Robin continues to be adorable! And Bruce cock blocks himself :)

Riddle this for me by Speechless_since_1998 - Batfam, complete. The Riddler captures Robin (Jason) and is being a big meanie to him >:( Luckily Tim is there to defend his honor until Batman arrives :D

Patchwork Pod by Ktkat9 - Superbat and Batfam, wip. More mer Bruce fic! Bruce is back, but injured! Also, where is Tim??? :(

keep me there by TheResurrectionist - Superbat, complete. Fellas, is it gay to distract your teammates from when your alien boyfriend isn't feeling too good by verbally attacking the nearest space cop? (The answer is yes!)

Collective Judgments by withthekeyisking - Batfam, complete. Dick has some incidents of people being racist to him about his heritage. Luckily, he has his family to protect him and call people out on their bullshit :)

A Brief Interview by Miss_Lazy_Tuesday - Batfam, complete. An AU where Tim is the youngest. Damian finds a small, unsupervised child stalking him. The only solution is to adopt him (obviously).

Padam by HaleHathNoFury (My_Trex_has_fleas) - Superbat, wip. A fic inspired by januariat's lovely art! A young, college student Clark explores his queerness for the first time by going to a gay club. I wonder who will meet there? :)))))))

Running Headlong into My Arms by gleesquid - Batfam, complete. Jason discovers the power he holds by calling Bruce "Dad." Shenanigans (and feelings) ensue.

Road Rage Robin by heartslogos - Batfam, complete. Turns out, Tim has terrible road rage. Shenanigans ensue.

Enjoy!

[wings-of-fire-confessions]

I like Moonbli. It’s one of my favorite ships actually, even if it’s not written quite well.

“But it’s so plain/boring/rushed!”

While I understand why people view Moonbli that way, I think the ship kinda makes sense that it became canon within the series and that the ship is cute & has good potential within it.

Qibli is one of the characters Moonwatcher has been with the most throughout the 2nd Arc.

They have some nice scenes and moments together that we unfortunately didn’t see due to being in the PoV of other dragons, like Peril.

Like with Moon and Qibli mourning Kinkajou condition’s together while Winter and Hailstorm were traveling to and at the Ice Kingdom and Turtle traveling with Peril (who were in the PoV of in Book 8).

As well as them bonding together within Possibility, such as when they went to the city’s library together, which is a scene that was mentioned by them within DoD to occur.

Qibli also is the second dragon to talk to Moon and come to terms with the fact she has powers after she revealed them, with both of them working together in order to find out who blew up the history cave with a dragonflame cactus.

And their ship being rushed within the story is unfortunate but at least understandable to occur within the series.

Since Tui. herself mentioned that she was conflicted about how to conclude the love triangle within the story because it could work either way, but she eventually decided to put Moon and Qibli together, so that may explain why it felt so rushed within the series.

And the fact that it felt like - at least, to me - Part 3 of Darkness of Dragons was squished into the series with the two fleshed out parts of the book with Qibli within the Scorpion den and SandWing Kingdom.

So while it doesn’t excuse that the ship is rushed, it does and may explain why that occurred in the first place.

Plus, while Moonbli isn’t developed well in canon, they, indeed, have the POTENTIAL to be an interesting and good ship.

Both Moonwatcher and Qibli are traumatized teenagers who were neglected and lived within a dangerous environment throughout their childhood and they both felt needed to mask and hide who they are in order to not be hated and rejected by others. With them learning that others will accept them for who they are being an important parts of their Arcs within their books.

Moonwatcher was physically neglected by her mother in order for her to not live within the volcano and be discovered by her tribe. This resulted in Moon, since the literally very day she hatched, to be left for literal days on end without the supervision of her mother, to the point that she had to learn how to hunt and gather for own food as a literal young child, within the rainforest, which is an environment filled to the brim with dangerous plants, animals and obstacles that could easily harm and/or even kill a young dragonet.

Due to her mother negatively viewing Moon’s powers similarly to how a neurotypical mother would negatively view their child’s autism and caring more about Moon’s reputation more than - without even considering - Moon’s comfortability around other dragons, she told Moon that she must hide her powers or else everyone around her would either dislike, hate or reject her for that part of herself.

This resulted in Moon to be socially anxious and even paranoid around other dragons, masking and hiding the fact that she has powers out fear of being rejected and hated by everyone around her, including the very dragons she grew to bond with (which also resulted in her to be more likely to be manipulated by Darkstalker).

Throughout her book, while at the JMA (and away from her mother), Moon thinks about whether SHE dislikes her powers and if SHE would want to get rid of them if she had the chance. Moon learns that they’re other dragons who will accept her and powers, and she decides to be herself and tells others about her powers when she’s comfortable or feels the need to do so.

While was physically and emotionally neglected by his mother. To the point that he was forced to hunt and steal food from other dragons in order to survive, within a dangerous environment full of dragons that would harm and even kill him if they ever caught him. He was physically and verbally abused by her and his siblings as well.

Due to this, Qibli was insecure and wished that everyone would like him, to the point that he felt to need to mask who he is by presenting himself is a “cheerful, extroverted and funny” type of dragon in order to be love and accepted instead of hated and discriminated by others and even wanting to have Darkstalker’s powers in order to be love by others and fix the bad problems of the world.

Throughout his book, he learns Darkstalker’s ways of making other dragons like him is wrong and pulls away from the possibility of having animus magic, not just because of the fact that he knew that Darkstalker was going to brainwash him and use him as a pawn, but probably also because of the fact that using magic in the ways he wanted to is wrong. From the experience with his friends and within his book, he learns that they’re other dragons who’ll accept him who he is, instead of the dragon he masks and pretends to be.

I like to think that they could bond, comfort, and sympathize with each other over their understanding over having similar experiences and trauma from being neglected and forced to survive by themselves within a dangerous environment throughout the majority of their childhood. And how they, while getting to know each other, open up and reveal parts of their true selves, and then help each other unmask themselves out their fears of rejection as well as help one another learn they they’re other dragons who will accept and love them for who they are.

So yeah - overall Moonbli is a cute ship that does have good potential, but unfortunately wasn’t executed well within canon.

Also I’m so sorry if I said anything wrong and/or didn’t write this as well as I should’ve, I typed this at around 1:00 am - 2:00 am lol.

.

[physalian]

#Writer Problems

Meet the 15th character in this series with a name that starts with A! No one will notice hahaha

Going back and deleting the sighs to shake things up a bit because there’s 120 in the manuscript

*checks notes* whoops you died already, Side Character, my bad

*one paragraph* Perfect. Amazing. Poetic. Profound. *the next paragraph* what is words do?

Knocking out a 6k word chapter in an hour/Spending a week on a single transition

*slaps down a shiny new character with zero plan* You don’t know anything about them and neither do I, let’s discover them together

Realistically, there’s gotta be at least one casualty from this fantasy battle so…. *rolls dice* no not you. *rolls dice again* yep. That’ll do. Sorry, pal.

Is this badass or stupid?

Is this hot or cringey?

*checks notes* damn it, plot hole.

Upon this most recent round of edits, you, Cool Side Character, no longer made the cut. Mayhaps you’ll be recycled later.

*checks notes* damn it, I fixed that plot hole by opening another plot hole.

Jesus christ I wrote ‘just’ 308 times across 120k words?

That is definitely not how you spell that

*dreams about my characters in full HD technicolor* awwww yeah, where’s the popcorn? *cannot replicate how cool it was in actual words*

Unes- Unnecs- Unessis- Unnessessarily- Unnecessarily fuck

Do I go with the British grey or the American gray?

*cries* this epic was supposed to be a novella

Well these two were supposed to be having an argument here. But making out is fine. I’d like to see where this goes.

Oops I forgot the straights, here that nameless dude over there isn't confirmed gay, so you can headcanon that he's straight if you want

Oops I forgot that marriage exists uhhh yeah their other parents are all dead or deadbeats

Fuck love triangles here’s a double-helix dodecahedron.

One day my fandom will write so much smut about this guy and I am here for it cause I sure ain’t doing it myself

Oops I forgot people with green eyes exist but brown eyes? I got 20

*describing the writing process* It was the best of times, it was the worst of times it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.

I. Hate. Chapter. Titles.

Is this profound or pretentious?

*crafts an absolutely banger metaphor* I hope someone notices this. I put a lot of work into it

I didn’t spend 6 months perfecting this masterpiece for you to sass that the curtains are just blue. I’ll write the goddamn essay myself about all the depth behind my color choices, sir.

Picture that Spongebob dehydrated in Sandy’s treehouse meme ‘cause that’s me on round 12 of edits

I gotta be up for work in 4 hours but this monologue is more important

*distills 30 pages of worldbuilding notes into 2 paragraphs of a fluff scene* somebody will appreciate this, won’t they?

*listening to my book playlist* one day when this is adapted I hope this artist is still alive to compose the main theme cause this shit fucks

*cries* this trilogy was supposed to be just one book

If I turn this plot hole into a character flaw, they become the problem while I remain god

*looting themes, monologues, character names, and archetypes off the corpses of my dead WIPs* You won’t miss them anyway.

While it also immortalizes this person’s dickish behavior, yes, I will, in fact, write a whole character’s backstory as a middle-finger to this one bitch from 10 years ago.

*steps back to gaze at all the suffering done unto my deuteragonist* but it was worth it, wasn’t it?

*staring down yet another loathsome action set piece* whyyyyy do I do this to myself?

Nobody’ll notice my author insert if I dice them up and divvy them out in bits to my entire cast, right? Right? It’s like a shell game of what’s author and what’s fiction

These two are going to be a problematic ship one day and I will burn that bridge when I get there

*2am and I am scouring the internet for that one piece of a fort’s defenses because not remembering is the current root of my insomnia*

*Nudging my favorite character who isn’t the protagonist out onto stage* golly I hope the readers like him

Waiting. For. Editors. Takes. So. Long.

Holy butts accidental motif and deep symbolism fucks. I am so pretending I did that on purpose.

To subtext or not to subtext? Nah, to subtext. *laughs maniacally*

Trying to ride that line between so obvious it’s painful but also juuust enough foreshadowing so you slap yourself for not seeing it sooner

TIL that I have been using that word completely wrong for years. How quaint.

No you’re derivative schlock. I’m crowd surfing the books that came before and loving every second of it.

Damn I wasted a really good name on this throwaway character

*checks notes* wait, who's taller? Where does your hair part? Are you left or right-handed?

*musing over a character slated for death* damn, I really like you. Since I am in fact god, you shall live another day. *rewerites the entire finale*

God I hope people like this story

[fanfic-lover-girl]

DBZ Thoughts: Yamcha Deserved Better

So I got into Dragonball because I grudgingly watched Kai on Nicktoons with my brother. My complaints became faker as the Frieza saga thickened and before I knew it, I fell in love with the series. Sometime later, I discovered Dragonball and watched that series as well. I think I watched GT after DB.

Since I watched DBZ first, I cared little for the human characters. I liked Piccolo because of his relationship with Gohan. And I enjoyed Krillin in the Namek/Frieza saga and I felt sad when he died. But I didn't really CARE. Tien and Yamcha were afterthoughts. I thought Chiaotzu was lame and a waste of space. All I cared about were the Saiyans.

But then I watched Dragonball and I fell in love with the human characters. So much magic and wonder. I like DBZ but Dragonball hits differently.

Anyway, I liked Yamcha. Was never a huge fan but I have really begun to feel sorry for the guy especially since my love for Vegebul has kind of faded a bit. I admit that even in the height of my Vegebul fanfic days as a teenage girl, I felt super uncomfortable or annoyed reading fics where Yamcha was painted as a loser, abuser or cheater. I hated how fanfic writers treated Yamcha like trash to make Vegeta look better. People out here trying to make Yamcha into a monster to make Vegeta, the guy who beat on Gohan in the previous two sagas and killed a village of Namekians with sadistic glee, look good :(. Now that I look back on it, I was reading trash!

Intro aside, I wanted to reflect on some ways that Yamcha could have been treated better in the series (DB and DBZ). I think Yamcha is a great character already and he does not need to be a bloodthirsty Saiyan to be amazing...but just some small things that could give him some more wins.

Dragonball: Yamcha vs Tien as the semi-finals fight

Yamcha's fight showcased Tien's cruelty. Roshi's fight symbolized the older generation being surpassed by the younger. But would the story change all that much if the fights were switched? Give Yamcha a chance to make it to the semis and use it as a storytelling device to show that Yamcha is catching up to Roshi as well. I think the story could have been even stronger if Tien was shown to surpass the older generation but then showed his cruelty.

DBZ: Bulma & Yamcha's breakup ending more amicably

I HATE how many Vegebul fans treat Yamcha. Yamcha is a good man and Bulma was always the abusive and unfaithful one in the relationship. I was not a huge Bulma fan in DB. Honestly, I don't think I truly liked Bulma until she got with Vegeta and became a mom. Anyway, why is it necessary to paint Yamcha as a cheater to pave the way for Vegebul? There are many ways for people to break up! The breakup could be a mutual thing where they decide they are better as friends (just look at their sibling vibe in the Buu saga). Maybe Future Trunks' arrival causes Yamcha to be more insistent on marriage and family and Bulma does not feel ready for the commitment. Maybe Yamcha walks away because he can't stand Bulma being friendly with the guy responsible for his murder. So many ways to paint Yamcha, and even Bulma, in a better light so that Yamcha does not look like the loser beta male who lost in the love triangle.

[noveratus]

Ok, I finished it. Here is my review, I'll do a little rewrite in a separate post. Spoilers for season 4.

Boy, am I sad that TUA was canceled after just two seasons!

For real though. This was shit. Truly and utterly shit. And it is a shame too, because it had potential.

Let's make something clear: TUA started as a parody/critique of superhero shows and an exploration of what happens when a superhero team akin to the Xmen split up. It explores how the superhero life can break someone, either from being a superhero or being pushed away from that life. Yes, the ending of season one with the world being destroyed was beautiful. But it shouldn't have been the main take away. Explaining the lore should never have been your take away. People watch the show for the characters, not your bullshit lore that makes no sense with made up elements and trying to redeem an abuser.

Season 2 was flawed, but it was beautiful, mostly because of Viktor and his discover of himself and who he was. I didn't really care for the other characters as much, but I still had a good time. It was fun! It was colorful! And people all and all felt like themselves, broken, messy but themselves.

Then came season 3, aka the character assassination of Allison Hargreeves, and I swear this season is just there to be there to make her unlikable, do the whole bullshit with Luther, who until that point was my least favorite character and then make you feel bad to dislike her as if she could be compared to Viktor in season 1. Viktor in season 1 was flawed, yes, but he didn't make every single decision to piss off the audience, and season 2 was all about him trying to prove himself to his siblings. But no. Allison just gets a get out of jail free card and gets everything go her way, but hey, if you ignore the shit show that was Allison's you have, well, you have what could have been an interesting dynamic between the families. It wasn't. But it could have been if the Sparrows hadn't been immediately killed.

And then we had season 4 which had the exact same issues as season 3 but worse because now, it isn't just Allison who is getting ruined, oh no, it is Fives, Lila and Diego because we need that forced romance and that stupid dreaded love triangle. And this is all this season is. A bunch of montages of nothing leading to an ending that is honestly very unsatisfying and doesn't make any sense:

A- They already were in a timeline where the Marigold was never released seeing as they didn't have any powers and yet they still existed.

B- They weren't the only source of Marigold. Maybe in this universe, but I'm pretty certain that Ben didn't drink all the Marigold. What about the guy Klaus splashed in Marigold? Did he get any powers? Christ, what is this bullshit?

C- No, no, I still need someone to explain to me why having multiple timelines is a bad thing??? What the fuck do you mean 'does this feel right?' There is a tentacle monster devouring that world, does that feel right? And that's the thing, you could fix this by saying that, instead of having multiple timelines be the issue, the issue is that the Marigold being released leads to the end of the world no matter what. Multiple timelines are a widely accepted theory, and isn't timelines bleeding into each other eventually going to fix the issue you have in the first place since it implies that they are all converging into one??? Stupidest time bullshit I've heard in a WHILE

D- This really leaves a sour taste in my mouth as does any and all endings that have 'death is the answer' as their conclusion. My dude, the whole point of the finale of season 1 was how no matter what, it's never too late, how people can still be saved, that's what they do with Viktor, it is all about healing and no we are abandoning that for what??? Getting gooed?! I hate this ending. I think that this trope needs to be killed and buried just like the characters they want to kill themselves.

But the ending is not even my main issue with this series. What is this show's issue with side characters? They just hate anyone who isn't Lila and the original Umbrella Academy. Why did we have to kill Luther's girlfriend in season 3? Why couldn't Fives have another love interest that wasn't the daughter of the people he killed AND the wife of his fucking brother? Also, Five felt weird this entire season, he lacked his quips and his mannerism and everything that made him Five, he just felt like a kid who was a genius or something except he never does anything particularly smart. He is just a completely different character, an emo kid who doesn't care about his family and is more interested in getting laid? Ugh. Back to the side characters, though, they implied that Viktor was having relationship issues in this season and yet that goes nowhere. Klaus and his sexuality is treated as a joke to the point of it being insulting and finally we have the final one. The big one. Ben and what's her face? I swear she gets like 10 lines max in the show despite being integral to the plot and 8 of them are spoken to Ben or about Ben. I've seen a lot of bad cases of female characters being just objects to their male counterparts but YIKES. That one was something. I'll talk more about this about my proposed rewrite for this season, however.

Also, Reginald does not deserve forgiveness. This is a Reginald hate account. Bro traumatized his son. The take away shouldn't be "maybe your abusive dad wasn't bad" the take away should be "your abusive dad doesn't deserve your forgiveness, get the fuck away from him, you don't need him, be with the people you love who love you back." Ah, found families, how I love you baby.

Those are my overall complaints. Everything else in this season hust felt pointless. You could have written this season to be 2 episodes long without really losing anything. The jokes were too childish, the choreography was ok I guess and the music (save baby shark, whoever decided to do that bit, I'm outside your house with a shotgun, don't worry, I just wanna talk) was the best part.

[beanghostprincess]

Bughawk is soooo underrated and it makes me so sad. Please tell me you see how grand this vision is

I am personally more of a Shuggy/Crocobug shipper but that's mainly because Mihawk isn't doing it for me much?? I love him and his gold autistic eyes staring into my soul and his classy attitude and vampiric looking aesthetic, but I wish he had more screentime to figure out his personality better and enjoy him more. But I do like him! I swear! And tbh one of my favorite ships is Cross Guild, like, the three of them together, even if I have a bit of a preference inside of the trio. I do love them and tbh I think Mihawk and Buggy's relationship would be really funny to explore. Especially within the fanon portrayals of the characters because god forbid Oda gives the cool edgy swordsman more than three minutes of screentime and more than five words per episode.

Okay, so doing a mix between fanon and canon and "whatever the fuck I want to see these characters as because I am the princess of this blog and I can do whatever I want": I think their relationship is fucking hilarious.

Unlike with Crocodile, Buggy doesn't really know what to do with Mihawk. Crocodile at least is easy to read and he's usually the one to make the first move, but what the fuck is Buggy supposed to do with the swordsman sitting in front of him, legs crossed and staring into his soul like he's about to bite his neck and suck him dry. Scary. And also very hot. But mostly scary. But turns out Mihawk is like, way more peaceful than what he thought. He likes reading. And classical music. And swords in a very weird obsessive way that the clown should not speak about. And not much, honestly. Cooking, too, apparently. Buggy keeps learning new things about him every day and the guy opens up little by little, because even if he's quiet, the very few words he says speak a lot for himself. He's also a fucking sadist and loves teasing Buggy all the time to the point of making him cry of frustration, but, well, when he's good he's really nice to be around <3

They both have history with Shanks. You know the movie "The other woman"? The one about this girl who discovers her boyfriend is married and then becomes besties with the wife and start hating him together? That's the energy I'm getting from this triangle. Stop making Mihawk cry over Shanks not loving him and a past love!! Make him go "Oh. Yes. Red Hair and I had something. Pretty sure he still felt something for you, clown, so I am not happy about that" / "What?! Why would you be angry at me for Shanks' shitty feelings that have absolutely nothing to do with me, by the way, our thing ended years ago when his stupid-" / "No, no. I am referring to him. Moron. I like you" / "You do???'' / "Sometimes. Sort of. Maybe. Your existence confuses me". And then they start dating because nobody can tell me Cross Guild isn't just a poly relationship doing business together.

I think Mihawk likes Buggy because it gives excitement to his boring life and also he's fun to bully. Besides, he's more than what he looks like and he actually has a dream and pirate spirit, so maybe he's not as useless as he used to think. He's still annoying, yes, but oddly comforting. Mihawk can't quite figure out what he wants with this clown, so he just sticks around with him. Buggy is like a chihuahua. A very loud chihuahua. Mihawk is definitely a black cat. They don't match. At all. Not in the slightest. And yet, Mihawk likes his company. And Buggy actually loves seeing all the soft and interesting sides of Mihawk and realize that he's not as scary as he looks like. I mean, he could slice him in half if he wanted to and he's still scary and hot but, y'know, he has a very domestic side that Buggy likes.

Thinking about them being established is pretty sweet because I think Mihawk would like reading out loud to him and Buggy would make the funniest comments about the story. And they would cuddle. And it would be so uncharacteristically soft of them and it's something they only do in private. Crocodile stares at them from the corner of the room and,,, He likes having them there. He's not alone and it's kind of sweet.

Also overprotective Mihawk with Buggy my beloved. In the sense of: He cooks for him because his eating habits suck. He makes him go on walks and do a bit of exercise. He makes him read, too. Listen to music that it's not only commercial pop or circus music or musical/Broadway tunes. He takes care of the clown when he's not bullying him. I think Mihawk treats Buggy like Sharpay Evans treats her dog.

And following the Shanks thing to end this post: Bughawk is really cool because I think it would break Shanks' heart and I love angst.

[97keanu]

Premise: Part two of Vanquish: A Keanuverse Story. In this part, reader chooses to embrace one of her destinies, healing the past and becoming whole again. She uses her new found self to save someone who didn't even know he needed saving, but the path there is laid with pain and darkness. She becomes something she never thought she would, and she finds out if evil vampires can really be saved or not...

Tags/CW: DARKfic, horrorfic, vampire!John Wick, blood/violence, soul connections, past lives, reincarnation, ghosts, supernatural AU, witch!neo, slayer!Constantine, love triangle is concluded, blood drinking, virgin!reader, smut, p in v, enemies to lovers, dub/noncon, innocent/crybaby(ish) coded!reader, john is an evil vampire asshole, soon to be cock addicted!reader, semi "stockholm syndrome"!reader, reader who discovers her bad side, reader who gives into lust, hedonistic!reader, doggy, rough, aggressive, primal, oral (f receiving.), so many smutty scenes.

A/N: In this choice, you will have to give up a lot to find love, but is it worth it in the end?

Go back.

"I have always felt as if I were missing something." You say, and Neo looks at you with worry, but nods, listening.

"Neo, I need you to stop the barrier between me and Helen." You can't believe you're saying this, but you know it's what you want.

Neo doesn't say anything for a long time, and you worry he won't do this for you.

"Are you sure that's what you really want?" You can hear the sadness in his voice. "He won't stop hunting you if you do this."

"I know." You say plainly, but bite your lip anxiously. A part of you knows that this isn't the safe decision. But you also know you haven't stopped thinking about that night, the way John's body pinned you to the wall. Temptation continued to knock at your door.

"I just have this feeling about it, and I...I have to do this." You assure yourself, trying to will being right about this.

You're worried he won't understand, but Neo sighs and takes a cigarette from behind his ear, lighting it up and nodding.

"If that's what you really want, I'll do it. But there's no reversing it when it's done." Smoke seeps from his lips as he talks, finally billowing out with a long breath when he's done.

You think for a moment. Do you really want to give up everything to become whole with your past self? Is she even really you, or have you experienced things so differently that you've become two separate beings, still forced together by fate? And if so, why would fate keep cycling you together?

More importantly, you know this is just a way to get close to John in the end. You know he's no good, that there is so little light in him, but you want him all the same. You wonder if those feelings are even yours or Helen's, but in the end, it won't matter.

You decide that there's only one way to find out, and you look back into Neo's warm brown eyes and nod.

"I have to know. I can't go on being in this purgatory between myself and her." Neo says nothing and stands, pouring a cup of black coffee from a dirty little pot in the corner of his room.

"Alright, but it's going to be a long night," he takes a deep sip of the coffee. "And it's likely to hurt."

You take a breath, and calm yourself, readying for anything.

"Let's do it." You affirm, and your hands clench nervously.

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Neo moves a dirty, dusty rug from the center of his room. The concrete beneath it has been used for many rituals, stains and etching here and there. He draws in the summoning circle, writing it there with chalk and herbs. He carefully transcribes sigils from his own spellbook, making sure to work carefully, but efficiently.

"I don't think Constantine will take the news well," he calls over his shoulder while he works, and you sit on a rickety little stool he scrounged up.

"I know," you hate thinking about it, so you try to push Constantine from your mind right now. "But he can't make my life choices for me."

And it's true. As much as you owe him for saving your life, and as much as you love him as a friend, maybe even something more at one time, you can't let his wants come before what you feel deep inside your heart.

You know the vampire John Wick is evil, years of grief can do that to anyone, but you also believe that there's a way to get past that. And you can't deny it any longer, the way he's touched you, body, mind and soul, is something you feel you've been waiting your whole life for. You feel the need to at least try, if not, at least maybe with your soul merged with Helen's once and for all, you feel complete for the first time.

You bite the inside of your cheek nervously as Neo continues to finish the first part of the ritual, and you close your eyes for a moment, trying to internally call out to Helen, if that's possible.

Minutes pass and all you hear is your own soft breath, and Neo's quiet muttering and movements on the concrete.

Then, something stirs in your chest, and you hear her.

"Please, save him if you can, I hate to see John suffering from being a man he would despise..."

You nod to yourself, feeling more affirmed in your decision.

You try to focus on calming breaths until Neo is ready for you.

Soon enough, you're sat on the dusty, cold floor of Neo's apartment, lines of chalk and fancy ritual symbols encompassing you. The smell of incense fills your lungs and Neo walks carefully over the chalk to anoit your forehead, eyes, and heart with an oil that tingles when it touches your skin. He finishes by lighting candles that encircle you, and he begins the ritual.

"I want you to focus on the parts of you that are Helen, and I want you to welcome those parts into your own being." he pauses and looks you in the eye with an emotion you cannot place. "You may see things, hear things, feel things that you cannot explain, and it may be painful, but you will work through it. I believe in you."

Somehow, it helps that no matter what, Neo supports your choice and is on your side. You're grateful for his neutrality and assistance.

You let him know you're ready to begin, and Neo starts speaking in a language you're unfamiliar with.

You close your eyes and try to imagine what he said.

You think about your first meeting with John Wick, and how even though you were so fearful, his touch was something your body yearned for. How electric it felt, how those emotions might have been Helen calling out to him, but you're also sure that it was apart of you that desired him as well. You've been so chaste all your life, and you know that you've longed for someone to ignite that kind of passion inside of you.

You welcome that desire, that yearning, that want. And you feel your heart swell, as if there was so much weight inside of you, stirring and trying to get comfortable.

You hear Helen's voice once more.

"Come, I need to show you something."

You follow that voice with your mind and heart, and you feel yourself rising, the cold cement underneath you fading away, and your mind finding a light in the inky black darkness.

You reach out, and when your hand touches the cold metal of a candlestick, your breath hitches. You can feel the object, really feel it in this place. The candle's light flickers as you take it, and hold it close, the warmth from the small flame touching your cold cheeks and neck.

You walk, feeling as if you're walking on nothing at all, until the light begins to cast a hallway before you. It's still ever so dark, but as you move, you notice it becoming more and more solid, the scene becoming extremely real to you.

You hear the voice again.

"This way..."

You follow where you're being let, and a door opens. You see a woman who looks just like you, standing and turning to see you. She looks pleased, walking forward with a confident stride. You open your mouth to speak to her, but she gets closer, walking so close that she walks right through you.

And suddenly you're her, and you see what she walking towards.

John Wick stands in the door way, his eyes dark, no red to be seen. He smiles at you, and opens his arms as you come to embrace him. You can tell by his smile he is still a vampire, but the lust for blood is gone, the grief in his eyes is no longer masked with hate and anger. Instead, he is simply happy, kissing you everywhere he can get his lips on, and you're there in his arms, not frightened, but giggling with glee.

You watch as he turns you and holds you from behind, his mouth on your neck, kissing and sucking softly. He teases you, and you can feel the shivers of delight he gives with each kiss.

And suddenly, you understand why Helen has wanted to come back to this, these moments with John. You feel a small wave of doubt on if that's even possible, but you know you have to try.

You feel as if a breath of life has been blown into you, and when you close your eyes and lean into John, you know you've also leaned into Helen, and as you realize that your heart swells. It feels as if your chest may even burst from how much is being taken up in such a small space, but slowly the pain dulls, and you find yourself fading back into the darkness.

You open your eyes and see Neo standing over you, his eyebrows drawn in concern. You blink, letting the world come back into focus, and when you do, you notice how everything looks brighter, more vibrant.

You wonder how different things will be now that you look through your own and Helen's eyes, in unison now.

"You made it," Neo says, then looks around your form. "Your aura's evened out, but into a new color entirely. Do you feel any different?"

You stare up at him, not sure what to say, the whole world feeling much too big and large for you now.

"I..." You start, then swallow the lump in your throat as reality sets in. "I feel...complete."

A few tears fall down the creases in the corners of your eyes, wetting your hair along the way. Neo gives a soft smile, then offers a hand, letting you sit up.

You can sense him now. John is out there, and he knows what's happened. It's only a matter of time before he comes to claim you.

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

You decide to come to him. You part ways with Neo and go out into the darkness of the night. You leave the city, Neo's apartment close to a wooded area nearby. You don't want to be interrupted this time.

You know this is dangerous. That John is not that warm and loving man that Helen showed you in her vision to you. You know that man, if he still exists, must be hidden deep. You can no longer deny the pull to him, however, and your feet keep going forward no matter what fears stir in your belly.

You walk, crunching over orange leaves and fallen twigs. The full moon illuminates your path and you feel as if your skin is ignited, sensations you wouldn't have thought possible are being made clear to you. When a critter scurries away, or an owl flaps it's great wings above you, you almost know before the creatures even know their own next moves. That's why, when John steps out of the shadows behind you, you already know he's there.

"I've seen it." You speak to him without turning. "I've seen the man you used to be."

You hear nothing for a few moments, and your breath softly hangs in the cold October air.

"You have no idea if that man still exists inside me," he finally speaks, his voice deep and controlled. "And yet, my little slayer, I find you offering yourself to me so easily."

"Helen showed me, told me of the love that still burns in your heart for her." You didn't hear him move, but John is standing directly behind you now.

"So now you know," his breath moves the hair on the back of your head. "That I am intrigued by you for that sole purpose. Do you not worry I shall use you as a vessel to get to my true love?"

"No," you know it doesn't matter now that your souls are joined. The truth is, you've always been Helen, and that is a fate you could never escape.

"So you've joined your past then..." He thinks for a moment, a clawed hand slowly running itself up your arm, ever so lightly touching it.

"Does it not bother you that she was a vampire, slayer?" He tilts his head with curiosity while softly running his hand up your shoulder to your neck, gently feeling the pulse there.

"It's a part of me. I cannot deny the past or the parts of myself I do not like. It's what makes me whole..." You know it to be true, and you look up, blinking at the bright moon that watches the scene of hunter and hunted below it. You wonder which one the moon thinks you are.

"I have been waiting for you for a very, very long time." John's voice is soft now, surprisingly full of an ache you couldn't understand. You can sense how badly he wants you, he needs you, what he doesn't want to admit.

"And now here I am," you say, your voice quivering for a moment as you walk into such a different path of life. "Asking you to give me your heart once more."

The vampire laughs softly, his hand moving from your neck to play with a loose strand of your hair.

"You ask so much of me." he pauses for a moment, then whispers out. "And would you still give yourself to me knowing that I may never change my wicked ways?"

"I know the real John is in there. Not the killer you've become."

"You sound so sure of yourself. I do not wish to set you up for failure, slayer. Even though my fangs throb and my throat dries from how badly I want you so." He can't deny his bloodlust for you, and a shiver runs down your spine as he speaks, moving aside your hair and whispering this into your neck.

"You believe I should fear you, John Wick?" You feel a confidence building in your stomach despite how frightened you truly do feel.

"Oh," John laughs as he gently scraps his teeth on your delicate skin. "You should be terrified, my dear..."

He wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you in suddenly. You cry out as he sinks his teeth into your flesh, and his hand moves to clutch your throat as he tastes you. You stand there, shaking in his grip, like a fearful deer in the wolf's mouth. Too startled and so quickly dominated by John to run, to fight back. The pain from his bite quickly turns to pleasure, building in your breast and following all the way down to between your thighs. You shudder from his touch, his mouth moving perfectly to carefully and slowly drink every drop of you he can. He's been waiting for this for so long, he couldn't have stopped himself if he wanted to, when you so freely trusted him and presented yourself to him.

A moan escapes your lips, and suddenly his free hand is groping your breast, feeling how tender the flesh is there and sending waves of pleasure through your body. His other hand grips your hip, pulling you into him and grinding your ass against his hardening cock. You have saved yourself for so long, but never knew you were saving yourself to be taken by such a predator. You hear John's soft growls as he bites you deeper now, taking more of your blood than he originally planned. You're just so sweet, so delicious, and fear mixes with your pleasure as you wonder if he will ever stop, or if he will drain you right here for being such a stupid little whore for him.

You reach up, your hands tangling in his mess of long, dark hair, and you can't help but need him in deeper, drinking you in just the right way that it sends waves of pleasure through your body. John growls become more animalistic, the need and the want overwhelming him. With the pleasure you're feeling, you find your mind foggy and dazed, the thought of letting John kill you somehow turning you on even though you know that's not what you should want.

You find yourself grinding your own hips into him, your legs parting, and John's hand on your hip slipping down, between your legs, beneath your skirt, and grabbing a handful of your wet pussy roughly. He grips your panties, pulling them up harshly so they slip in between your tender lips, finding the perfect spot to grind against your sensitive clit. He works you like that, fucking you with your own panties, and drinking deeper still until you think you may slip into the darkness of pleasure that coaxes you so sweetly. And you let him, a little lamb to the slaughter, looking up at him with big wet doe eyes that ask to be killed so gently.

Just as you think you've truly made a mistake, fear coiling in your stomach and making the pleasure you feel heightened to a degree you don't think you can handle, John pulls his fangs from your neck. He laps the wound there, and it slowly heals, but he's not done with you.

"You've made the mistake of trusting a monster." His voice is full of cruelness and lust. "And now I shall show you what happens when you do."

Your head is so light from the loss of blood, and you can barely fight back, your body so weak. Without warning he flings you into the ground of the forest, leaves and twigs scrapping your hands and knees. Your body falls without a fight, so easily manipulated at this point. You can hardly think of the reality of the consequences you've yet to face from doing such a thing.

John is at your hips once more, grabbing your ass and positioning so perfectly face down ass up. You look back at him, eyes glossy and dazed, tears you have no control of overflowing and dropping onto the dirty ground. Your cheek lays against the earth, dirt beginning to sully your perfect little face.

"It's so sweet you thought you could fix me." He laughs as he rips your underwear, the sound echoing into the quiet night.

Your bare ass faces him, the cold air teasing your extremely hot and wet cunt. He slaps your ass with a satisfying noise, grabbing it and digging his claws in just enough to hurt.

"You're going to regret giving yourself up to me so easily." His cock is now free from his pants, and he spits on your pussy, rubbing it in and mixing it with your already budding wetness, using the tip of his large cock to do so.

He pauses and watches you as you look up at him so innocently, lip quivering, tears falling, too dazed from blood loss to fight him. And then, just when you think he won't go through with it, he plunges all of his long, girthy cock into you in one harsh blow. You've never been fucked before, so the pain reels in your mind and you cry out, hands gripping the earth. For a moment, you try to crawl away from his cock, using most the energy you have left to do so. John laughs, reaching forward with one hand to grab your hips and thrust himself back deeper inside of you, using the other to grab a handful of your hair, pulling you from the earth painfully. Leaves fall off your cheek where they stuck, and you can only look up at the stars and the crimson eyes of the man who's taking everything from you.

"After this, you will no longer be able to deny me. You will no longer be able to go back to being an innocent little slayer." he thrusts into you once more, your mouth opening for a silent scream as you are filled up more and more by his cock, beyond what you ever thought you could take.

"You will be my pretty little whore, a slave to my cock, and a slut that loves to let me drain her." The worst part was, you knew it was true.

Even now, barely able to keep your eyes open from being drunken so deeply, you craved the pleasure those fangs gave you. You hate how your body betrays you, the way it feels so good to be dominated and fucked by John right now. Your legs quiver and shake on the dirty ground from how badly you want to cum. If only your sensitive little clit had attention right now.

"I want you to say it." John says, looking into your eyes as he fucks you and wrenches your hair. "I want you to say that you're mine, and I might just let you cum."

You bite your lip, trying to focus on the pain there instead of how good John's cock is, not wanting to give in. His free hand slaps your ass once more, taking a few hits out on it and leaving handprints that slowly redden. You hate how good it feels to be so degraded by him, for your body to have the sole purpose of being used up by a much more powerful being such as him. It's twisting your mind, rewriting all the training you had as a slayer and making you the perfect little whore.

Your mouth opens and cries out as John pull you up off the ground further by your hair, til your finger tips can barely touch the earth. He reaches around and grabs a handful of your breast, which he slips his hand under your blouse to do so. He quickly gets to your bare skin there, and plays with your nipple, twisting and pulling just the right way. It drives you mad, and you can barely breath as you're overcome with the sensation of that and John thrusting deeper and deeper inside of you.

"Give it up, slayer...You know how badly you crave this. Just admit you're my little toy from here on out and I'll be nice for once." His voice is now in your head, wrapping and twisting around in there, your ability to fight back dwindling more and more.

You can feel John's cock begin to swell, wanting so badly to finish you off. You grit your teeth and try to ignore how badly you want this, and how desperate you are to cum under any circumstance.

"You should decide quick, or else I'm going to use your sweet little cunt as my cumdump and be done with you." John growls, twisting your nipple so hard you cry out into the night.

"I-I'm...!" You try to fight it, try to not let him win, but your body aches, and you need this release so badly.

"You'll have to do better than that, my little pet." He snarls and thrusts in harder and deeper a few times just to break you down further.

"I'm..." Your mouth can barely whisper it out, and your eyes flutter, so tired and wanting to shut. "I'm yours..."

John grins and his hand snakes between your legs, finding your clit and stroking everywhere but it.

"That's it. Tell me what you are to me." He commands, teasing your clit. You feel shivers run along your body and you twitch, trying to move so his fingers will brush over your clit properly.

"I'm, I'm..." Your mind is blank, mouth moving and saying whatever it can form. "I'm your little whore..."

He flicks his fingers over your clit, and you jump from the attention, but moan out from how good it feels. Then you whine when he stops.

"And what else?" You hate how he teases you, and whine harder like the little brat you are when you don't get your way.

"I'm your slut..." You barely know what you're saying at this point, you know anything will come out of your mouth right now if it means you get to cum.

"Yes, good girl..." He whispers into your ear, rubbing your clit properly once more, a bit longer now, then stopping again.

"P-please!" You whimper out, your breath coming so hard and quick now as you get closer, but are denied once more.

"Keep going, tell me how beneath me you are." You feel humiliated from how easy it is now for him to take you and make you do whatever he says. You truly are but a puppet in his hands now.

"I'm your dirty little slut...your bitch..." You blink, trying to cum up with more, but every time you say one, he plays with your sweet spot, then denies you when you stop, making it so hard to think.

"Keep going."

"I'm your cumdumpster...a hole to fuck...your pretty little blood doll to drain when you get thirsty." you have no idea where all this is coming from, but you'll say anything right now as long as John keeps his cock pounding you and his hand sending waves of pleasure through your body while he pets your cunt.

"I'm a mindless little slut for your cock and I had no idea that's what I was meant for before you fucked me into submission..." You whisper out, feeling completely degraded and knowing John's working on those emotions in your mind to help make such horrible words come out of your mouth.

"That's right. And now, I'm going to claim you as mine and keep you forever until I get tired of you." Your body shudders from the thought of being so entrapped by this monster, being so completely used up and broken by such an enemy, and so easily tricked into doing so.

You feel your clit aching from the teasing touches, and your cunt is starting to get sore from how it's being used. You feel John pull you up so he can get to your neck, your back against his torso, his hard abs cool against your hot skin. He uses his hands to keep you steady, his cock still finding a way to keep you stimulated, and his hand working on your clit. He waits til you're shaking, legs ready to give out, and cunt clenching so hard and tight around his cock you think you might break. Then, just as you're spilling over the edge, those waves of sweet pleasure starting in your legs and moving out, he sinks his fangs into you once more.

Your pleasure is mixed with the pain of being bitten again, then quickly moves to heighten your cum. John's cock can handle it no more, finally, spilling his cum so deeply inside of you, throbbing and in need of making sure every last drop gets inside. You feel yourself continuing to cum, much longer than you ever could have thought possible, and darkness beginning to take you as well. You fade into an abyss filled with pleasure and nothingness, and for the first time in your life you feel bliss from being so perfectly taken.

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

You awake on deep burgandy sheets of silk, twisted up in your legs. You kick out, the silk slippery and expensive feeling, and your foggy mind tries to make sense of what you're seeing around you. You blink, and try to use your hands to rub your eyes and make the scene make sense. It takes a moment, but you begin to see in the dimly lit room.

It's opulent, dark red and deep browns filling your vision. It's a room that looks older, but the items inside are still so prestine despite looking Victorian or earlier. You look about the bed, it's huge, and you feel as if you're on a boat in the middle of the sea. You look up and see the bed posts extend upward, red velvet curtains adorning it and creating a little enclave.

You peek from the bed to see more of the room, body moving slowly, stiff and sore. You realize as you move, someone has dressed you in a light, white and airy, nightgown. As you look from your body back to the room, one of the doors to the room opens.

John walks in, a golden tray in his hand, covered. He says nothing, but he is extremely dominant just from how he walks up to you.

He sees you recoil from him slightly, and your blood starts to pound a bit faster now. His face is stoic and let's no emotions come through.

"Here." He says, not exactly gently.

He sets the tray on the bedside table, and waits for you to move first.

Your mind is hazy, but you remember much of what happened between the two of you. You feel more naked now than when he was fucking you relentlessly. More shy, afraid of being so normal in front of him.

He watches you, a hand gesturing to the tray slightly, waiting for you. You move slowly, not taking your eyes off of him, unsure of if this is a game or a test. You slowly grab the cold metal of the cover of the tray, and pull it off with measured movements.

You glance away from him finally, to see what he's brought you.

On the tray, a delicious looking breakfast. All of your favorite foods of this meal are present on a few different sized plates, complete with a steaming hot cup of tea. You look back up at him, and your eyes narrow for a second, wondering how he would know to make such a perfect breakfast for you.

"It was her favorite too." He says simply, the slowly, as if waiting for you to say now, sits on the bed.

The bed has more than enough room, so you sit near the edge and by the table, and he at the end of your feet. He watches what you will do next.

Despite yourself, your stomach growls from the smell of the wonderful meal, and you can't take it any longer.

You begin to eat, slowly, and to your surprise once more, it tastes as amazing as it looks. You didn't know a vampire could cook so well, but you're not questioning it now.

John watches you with curiosity, and soon you get so into your meal, you forget that you should be afraid of the man at the end of the bed. You pause halfway through, your stomach getting fuller faster than you would have thought. You softly move, positioning yourself so you can look directly at John and drink your tea.

This time, you wait for him to make the first move.

"I'm sure you have a lot of questions..." He finally says, and you look at him, not giving anything away either.

The truth was, somehow, you had less questions than you thought. You know what's happened, and you feel less like two entities in one body every passing second. In fact, now you feel as if you've moved into a singular being, and with Helen's knowledge of John lingering in the back of your mind, you know how he will treat you here.

"Or maybe not..." He says with a smirk, clearly reading your mind so easily.

"I still think you're in there, the real John." You take a sip of tea, and you know the hope has not been taken from you entirely.

"Oh really?" John says with a smirk, clearly intrigued. "After what I've done to you, you still think there could be good inside of me?"

You laugh, and John looks genuinely taken back, for only an instant.

"Oh yes," you are now the one smirking. "Just because you're a good fuck, doesn't mean you can't be a good man either."

Your voice is a tad cocky, coyly acting as if the events of him taking you that night were actually your idea. And for a moment, you think that maybe it was...

"I'm hardly a man, you know that, slayer." He says and this time he laughs.

"And I'm hardly a slayer, anymore." You raise your eyebrows and take another sip of the spiced and sweet tea.

John nods, saying nothing, obviously thinking over what you've said. You wonder if you truly could stump the feared John Wick with such ease.

John stands, and walks to the second door in the room. He opens it, and from your view on the bed, you get a peek into a bright white and gold accented bathroom, much larger than any you've seen before.

"The bathrooms here, if you need it." John walks back over to you, leaving the bathroom door open.

He gathers the tray, but leaves you with your tea.

"If you need me, call out. I will hear you."

And with that, he walks out the door he came in, and you hear the particular sound of a lock being engaged. You think on what he said, the implication being not only will he hear you if you call for him, but hear anything else as well. You understand that despite the more kind aspect of feeding you today, and giving you such a gilded cage to stay in, you are still his prisoner.

You decide to get out of bed, your long nightgown flowing with your movements, and your bare feet pad across dark wooden floors. You look into the bathroom closer now, and see all the grandeur of it. The room is large, with a huge marbled bathtub in one corner, big enough to fit 5 or more with comfortably. The side closest to the door holds a sink and counter, behind them a long and tall mirror that makes the room seem even bigger. Across from the sink is a vanity area.

You walk over and inspect it, seeing it is complete with any make up item you may want, of course namebrand only. You spy a few perfumes as well on a tiny golden tray, and you test them. You surely will not like all of the scents, but to your surprise, it's the each smells you'd love to wear most. He really has thought much of this out.

You decide to undress, and as you do, you see your body in the mirror. Bruises on your knees and arms are deep purple, your ass still spotting some red marks and violet as well. Your muscles are sore as you take the dress off and all it combined reminds you of what happened before you came here.

You aren't really sure how to feel about it. You know, if you detailed what happened to any of your friends, or god forbid Constantine, they would immediately think the worst has happened. But somehow, despite the social pressure to deny how much you liked it, you know that when you walked into that forest, in search of John Wick, it was a possibility that he would fuck you so savagely. And the deeper part of you had hoped for it to happen. You look away from the remnants of his touch on your body, and move towards the bathtub.

You sit on the edge while the tub fills with steamy water, looking at the stained glass windows across from the tub. Moonlight pours through them, leaving a red stain across the room from the depictions of roses and such within the glass.

You finally are able to sink deeply into the tub, and you're able to float on your back in there, simply letting your mind and body rest in the heat of the water that envelopes you.

You wonder what happens now.

You've set out to heal your soul bond to Helen, which you've done. But now, a different bond tugs on your heartstrings.

You know that the reason you've come here, given yourself up to John, is because he is connected to you in ways you can't begin to untangle. Not now, after you've chosen to go down this path.

You can tell he wants to use you, in whatever evil way he desires, but you wonder if it could be called 'being used' when the pit in your stomach yearns so deeply for it.

You know you were raised to be a slayer. That it runs in your blood to kill monsters, like John especially. But you never really felt like that was meant for you. You were never as good at it as Constantine. You always lacked something and never even progressed past killing low level monsters. How were you supposed to ever be a great slayer when the odds were so stacked against you?

You sigh, the steam rising from the tub and the mirrors of the bathroom fogging over. You sit up, and reach for expensive looking soaps and haircare on the side of the tub, and begin to gently wash up.

The act of taking care of yourself in such a way soothes you, and you love the scents that have been chosen for you. In a weird way, this is much more calming than any of your years as a slayer. You wonder what else is in store for you, if there's something that will make you regret this so greatly, but apart of you is ready to face anything if you can see the one your heart hungers for on the other side.

You wonder if this is how hedonists feel. Giving into lust, yearning, want, and letting yourself have whatever it is that your body desires, uncaring for if that choice is bad for you.

You wash your body in thought, and as you do, you begin thinking of John's cock again. Maybe that was all it took. Being held down and fucked like an animal, and now you feel so empty without him inside of you. That's what he said right? That you would be a slave to his cock?

You let your hands wander your body in the bath, and you softly touch yourself. Small moans escape your mouth as you keep going, echoing in the large bathroom. You think of John fucking you again, and soon enough you're body is hot with desire. And by the sounds of footsteps entering the bathroom, yours isn't the only one.

You don't need to stop, or move, to know who it is. With your connection strengthening, you know John has stepped into the room. You were hoping what when he said he could hear anything, he would hear you in here touching yourself.

You've become such a naughty girl since you let go.

John approaches the tub, and right now, your back is to him. You have no idea if he came in this way, or quickly undressed, but soon enough, he is entering the warm water with you. He swims carefully behind you, and his hands, still cold, softly caress your back.

You shiver and turn to him, seeing him now, fully naked and immersed in the water as you are.

"Couldn't even finish your bath?" He teases you, voice so soft.

"Mhm..." You simply respond, and now that you're both so exposed to each other, you come in closer.

"You're so easily tamed. Don't you feel like such a whore for giving into me like that?" He chides and smirks, and all you can do is laugh.

If only he knew that you do feel like a whore, but it's not because of how badly you crave his cock. It's something you're slowly starting to choose, and each time you give into such a desire, the more freedom you really feel.

You reach for him, and feel his chest, slowly warming in the hot water. You let your hands run down it, and to your surprise, John let's you do as you please. He watches you with intrigue, and you remember how many more years of experience he has over you. You wonder if there's anything you could do to surprise him.

"You already have." He says, reading your mind once again.

"It's not fair you have access to all of my thoughts, and I have none of yours." You pout, and keep letting your hands explore his body more, slowly.

"You need but ask, Сладкая..." He speaks something in his foreign tongue and through your connection you don't have to ask to know it's for endearment.

"Why do you think you can't be saved?" You ask, and are worried to look into John's eyes.

A long moment passes, and finally you do. John looks down at you from where he's relaxed against the side of the bath, and seems to be thinking.

"I don't think someone who's killed as much as I have, taken as many lives as I do, has much to be saved left." He says this, and you can tell it's sincere.

You nod, listening, and you don't know what to say. It's true. You know after Helen died, he became the assassin he is, killing vampires, humans, and other supernaturals alike. In a way, you think, he's more of a slayer than you are.

"You're probably right." He laughs, and you blush as you realize once more he's overheard.

"If you don't like doing it, you could quit being an assassin." You say softly, running a hand upward and letting it play with the ends of his hair, still not wet from the tub yet.

"It's the only think I could do. After I lost you the first time, I couldn't do anything to make myself feel. Killing changed that." You're surprised he's confiding in you so.

"It won't change much, telling you how I feel. Knowing my feelings doesn't absolve me from the wickedness in my heart." He says, looking deep into your eyes, his now a red so dark you can scarcely tell it's true color.

"I will want you again. And I will take you however and how much I like." He says this extremely plainly, as if there's no other way. "I will not kill you, but you are mine now."

He looks at you for response, and you show him nothing.

"Do you really think a man who will use you for your body and blood, who cannot give you anything in return from a heart so shrivelled as mine is, is the correct choice?" You sense how much he believes this to be true.

You place a hand over where his heart should be. You feel only the faintest and dullest of beats.

"Perhaps, with enough of my blood beating in there, you will feel the love I still have for you, after all these years of waiting." When you speak like this, you know it's more of Helen coming out of you, but you can see from how you use such words, John's eyes seem to soften ever so slightly.

"That is a kind thing to wish for..." He takes your hand in his, and pulls you to him. He kisses your hand, and you let it open like a flower for him.

He kisses your palm, still wet from the bath, and he kisses further, reaching your beating wrist. His eyes flash up to you, the red brightening as his hunger shows.

"You let such a monster as me have free reign over you?" He whispers into your wrist, breath tickling you there. "Oh what a silly little slayer you are..."

"I'm not sure if I was ever cut out to be a slayer..." You can't believe you're saying it out loud, but it's true. You always felt you had to be, that it was what was destined for you, but it never fulfilled you the way it did others.

"Ah, so you've come to use me for your rebellious phase then...?" He jokes and laughs into your wrist before gently nipping at it with his teeth.

"You could say that..." You joke back, but in reality, your breath is caught as you imagine his fangs sinking into you there.

Your thighs squish together in the water as you try to hide your want to feel the pleasure that those teeth bring.

"Don't think I forgot what brought me in here..." John teases you, and you bite your lip as you try not to whine for him. The temptation grows.

"I know how badly you must want me to drink of you again..." John swallows, obviously hungry himself. "But I cannot, you haven't fully recovered from last time."

You can't help it, the whine escapes your lips as he says this and then licks against your pulse, pulling you into his lap as he does so.

"Would an evil vampire care so much for letting me recover?" You whisper out, confronting him despite yourself.

"One that wants to use every last drop of their blood doll does..." He chuckles and let's his teeth run up your arm, until he finds your neck, moving wet hair out of the way.

He kisses there, at that perfect spot on your neck until your moans are filling the room. He let's his hands steady you, and take your body in, exploring every curve, your waist, your back, your breasts.

Oh, how you wish he would touch between your thighs, though...

He smirks and looks you in the eyes.

"Should I be nice for once and let you have what you want?" You don't know if he's serious or not, but from the flash in his eyes you suspect something devious.

He turns, lifting you up and setting you onto the edge of the bathtub with ease. There's more than enough room for you to sit, and John looks up hungrily from between your legs.

He takes in the sight of your body and grins.

"Tonight, I shall taste of you in a different manner..."

He pulls you to the edge and opens your legs without asking, you cry out from how aggressive he is. You can see that primal look in his eyes once again, and you know there's no stopping him now. You also know, you wouldn't allow him to stop anyways. Your breath catches as his head dips between your legs, breath on your most sensitive area already, and before he can ease you into it, he's lapping at your wet cunt.

You squirm and his hands dig into your thighs, pulling you in and capturing you there. You feel caught in the wolf's mouth, not daring to move lest he bite down too hard.

You feel your pleasure ramping up as his tongue continues to tease you, alternating between too much stimulation then not enough, John waiting for you to whine before he gives you more.

Your hands move to tangle in his hair and he grabs them, moving them back. He's not letting you have even an ounce of power right now.

You begin moaning more and more as he focuses his mouth directly on your clit, sucking until you think you'll go mad.

"Say my name." He commands, and you try to think straight as he goes back to licking.

"J-john..." You whisper out, and he grabs your thighs harder, growling.

"Louder."

You bite back giving him what he wants and instead hold your breath as you try to edge yourself closer to the edge.

"Not until I hear you scream my name." John looks up at you with those red eyes, no longer stimulating you, waiting.

Fuck. He's got you right where he wants you, once again.

He laps slowly, teasing his tongue through your folds but not giving enough for you to finish, just enough to prolong your need.

"Fuck..." You whisper out, trying to buck your hips into his mouth, but he holds you down with his steel grip.

You can't take it anymore, your breathing is ragged and sharp, and your body needs release.

"John..." You whisper once more, looking down and seeing that same glare as before, knowing you aren't nearly loud enough.

"God, John!" You moan out again this time getting louder, and every time after building.

He lets you scream his name until he's satisfied, finally flicking his tongue perfectly, sucking and licking just right until you're shaking. He let's you twitch into him, your need to grind against his face given freely as long as you keep his name perched on your lips.

You finish, and he slows down his tongue in time with your breath, easing you down from your high.

He smirks at you once more from between your thighs and pulls you back down into the steamy water.

He says nothing, but slowly runs his hands on your silky, slick body. You feel content in his soft touches, and for a moment you think you might even fall asleep as he does so. He leans you back into the water, wetting your hair then applying shampoo, the smell sweet and lovely. He washes your hair with precise fingers, the feeling on your scalp sending tingles down your back. You look up to keep soap from getting in your eyes, and glance at him. He seems as relaxed as you right now.

"Why are you being so kind to me now?" You shouldn't ruin the moment by asking, but you have to.

"Just because I am capable of good doesn't mean that I am good." He whispers back. "Besides, I like to take care of my things..."

You let him finish washing you, then he helps you from the steamy bathwater, offer a hand as you step out. He hands you a fluffy white bath towel, and a smaller one for your hair. You've never felt so cared for, even though the man doing so is supposed to be such a monster. You know he's wrong. He can't hide how much he cares for you for long.

He gets you a new nightgown and helps you back to bed, your body still overly tired and weak. Another set of tea is already out and prepared, you wonder by whom, but you don't care.

You drink the liquids left out for you with fervor, your body thirsty after sweating in the steam of the bath. John walks over to a fireplace in the room, and begins to light it, toying with the flaming wood until its to his liking.

"You don't have to worry here, you know..." He says softly, still looking at the fire.

"No?" You reply.

"No...I will have your every need taken care of, but I have conditions."

"Which are?" You look at his back, his eyes still glued to the flame.

"You may not leave here. I will not allow you to see your friends. And your body is for me to consume as much or as little as I like." He says the conditions so plainly, and you wonder if you'll be able to adhere.

You say nothing and he stands, turning to leave not looking at you.

He pauses at the door, only half moving his head in your direction.

"Goodnight." He whispers, then closes the door and locks it once more.

You crawl under the covers, and the warmth from the fire keeps the cold at bay. You wonder where your life with John will lead.

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

You lay there, head full of dreams that whisk away reality, softly breathing. The balcony doors to the room shutter against the cold of the wind. November is near now, and the weather has started to dip into a frosty tendency. You are grateful for the warmth of the room as the wind continues its wickedness outside. You sleep somewhat peacefully despite your situation.

That is, until the knocks came.

You thought perhaps a branch or some other bit of nature had summoned itself against the glass, but the intensity of the knocking grew louder. Your eyelids flutter open and you blink away sleep, trying to see what it is that has disturbed you.

A shadow cast across the room, a long, dark shadow that is human in form. You feel fear slide down your spine as you quickly look at the window to see the source, and your heart sinks.

It's him.

Constantine.

You fling yourself from the bed at once, feet slapping against the cold wooden floor. When you come to the glass doors of the balcony, you pause, wondering if you should really open it. You glance up at Constantine's face, and the love you once held for him is still a dull ache in your heart.

You open the doors.

He immediately embraces you, his warmth shining through despite the cold.

"You have no idea how long I've been looking for you..." He whispers into your hair.

You've never seen him so tender.

Your absence must have been harder on him than you thought it would be. You had only known him barely a year before you met John, but there was an undeniable bond between you two. There still is.

You pull yourself away from him.

"What are you doing here?" Is all you can say, and Constantine's face drops.

"I'm here to rescue you? What the fuck do you think I'm here for?" The gruffness and mean tone of voice you're used to is back.

"I never said I needed to be rescued." You fold your arms across your chest, stopping some of the billowing of your nightgown in the wind that blows in from the open doors.

"Why else would you be here with a vampire? I don't believe that you have come here on your own accord, you're a slayer, we don't do that..." He says this slowly, watching your reaction, looking at you as if you were a foreign object he must inspect.

"I..." You begin to speak, then close your mouth, unsure of what to say.

"Don't tell me you actually decided to come here on your own..." Something inside his words, beyond the cruel exterior, was almost pleading you to say no.

You say nothing.

Before Constantine can open his mouth to speak once more, the doors to your bedchamber open with sleek vigor.

John stands there, staring Constantine down.

Before you can stop them, they're already at each other, Constantine going to grab a stake off of his back, and John going for his throat.

"Stop!" You call out, and you realize you cannot bear to lose either of them. Your heart beats wildly and you try to think of a way to end this.

To your surprise, Constantine is able to get John pinned, his stake aimed and John's hand holding his arm to stop him from drilling it into his heart.

"Please! Don't!" You scream out, and Constantine looks at you.

"Tell me you want me to go and I will." He says, grunting with effort to keep the upper hand while distracted.

"Tell me you choose him and I will never bother you again." His voice caught, rough and pleading with you.

You have no idea how you're supposed to choose so suddenly. You open your mouth but cannot muster words to come out.

"Fine." Constantine says and soon allows John to break free from him.

As John goes in for the kill, Constantine jumps from the balcony, giving you one final look, that you know means you won't see the last of him.

You rush to the edge of the balcony, to see where he's gone.

When you check the ground, so far down you don't think you could ever make such a jump, he's already gone. The only evidence being boot prints in the wet grass and the anger on John's face.

"John...I--" before you can speak grabs you and flings you into the bedroom.

He shuts and now locks the balcony door, your one salvation to the outside world these past few weeks.

He glares at you, his red eyes full of emotions you don't think you could ever feel so intensely. His eyes lock with yours, and you can see the pain there hidden behind a sardonic grin.

"Seems you're still tethered to the past, my dear. I think it's time you make a choice."

With that, he leaves you there, tears welling up in your eyes as your heart hurts from both of them.

The door to your bedchamber clicks and you're all alone once more...

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

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