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Bruce coming home one day to find Robin Jason clinging onto a chandelier with Dick below him cheering him on.
Bruce: Jason what are you doing?
Jason: Dick said that you missed his antics after he moved out and so he’s teaching me how to be a better son
Dick: After this we’re going to drive the Batmobile into the bay :D
Jason: We’re going to what? I mean yeah! Right into the water.
Jason trying to whisper to Dick: Dick I can’t swim though
This just further fuels the chaotic dynamic of Dick and Jason during a time where Dick was still going through his teenage angst and was absolutely not a benevolent role model LMAO
I mentioned it in this post, but it's just so funny to me to imagine a Jason who grew up with an absolutely WILD Dick Grayson as an older brother, while the younger batkids grew up with a more mellowed out and mature (arguable but when measured against the other kids, he wins by a landslide) Dick Grayson.
Robin!Jason era:
Dick: You wanna go out and get high?
Jason: I can't, I have homework.
Dick, sputtering: HOMEWORK?
----
Dick, about to do an elaborate (and totally not dangerous) acrobatic move in the manor: Watch this, littlewing
Jason: You shouldn't do that, it'll make Bruce upset.
Dick, on the brink of angry tears: Why are you like this.
----
Jason, dejected: Listen, I know you don't approve of me because you think I'm not good enough as Robin, but-
Dick: Not good enough as Robin? I don't care about that, I just think you're a little bitch
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Dick taking Jason out on a hangout for the first time: OK, looks like I got my work cut out for me. Take out a notepad and write everything down. I will NOT have my successor embarrass me like this. So what you wanna do to piss off Bruce-
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[Years later, Jason returning to Gotham with the fury of a thousand suns and the chaos to match it]: I'm gonna make your life a living HELL, Bruce
Dick, older and relatively more chilled out: Okayyyyy, maybe let's just– calm down a lil, haha, no need for the theatrics
Jason, betrayed, observing a Dick Grayson who is teaching his new younger siblings to behave and be mature: Dick, what the FUCK
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Present!Dick, mentoring Tim: Make sure not to be too impulsive, don't wanna raise Bruce's blood pressure
Red Hood!Jason spying on them from afar: Who even ARE you??
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Jason: So you teach me ALL of that, only to turn into the ONE thing you despised so greatly all those years ago
Dick, sweating: Well-
Jason: I'm ASHAMED. How can you be worthy of being called my PREDECESSOR?
#Jason (disappointedly): you either die a villain or live long enough to see yourself become a hero#Dick: we have so much to catch up on! anyways so Tim became Robin and I'm a cop in Bludha-#Jason (incredibly distraught): YOURE A COP??!?#Jason to tim: Alright looks like I have to be the one to pass on Dick's legacy now LISTEN HERE-#ok but seriously Tim is already insane on his own. kid didn't need dick's guidance at all. he's just like that#imagine the chaotic older brother u grew up with turned out to be a cop id literally throw up#jason todd#red hood#dick grayson#nightwing#tim drake#red robin#robin!jason#batfam#batfamily#batkids#batbros#bruce wayne#batman#dc#incorrect quotes#crack#fanatical asks#fanatical posting
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sans undertale would not make i fucked your wife jokes. people want to make jokes about sans fucking asgore's wife but sans the character would NOT do that r you kidding me. you can cut the secondhand embarrassment with a knife every time they're in the same room together, sans likes the guy, i bet he feels genuinely kinda bad for asgore. he'd be like sorry about the dating your ex wife thing. to be fair she's a really cool ex wife. and asgore would be like (rescue shelter dog sigh) She is.
#i do think he would keep things polite but distant in the early days post pacifist because tori doesn't want anything to do with him#but after some time passes and they became tentative friends he probably like. asks him to manage the grill at the cookout together#gifts him a HUGE sized pair of socks right back for that other time#cracks some jokes. like they seemed to be on pretty good terms in the game#undertale#sans#asgore#soriel
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sometimes you gotta lure your overly-studious ravenclaw gf into spending time with you 🥰 📚 ( from 'Every Teardrop is a Waterfall' by Kat_12739 on ao3, GO READ IT!!! the first story is about seb falling sick and still pushing himself/not admitting he's sick until he ends up in the hospital, the second story is about the birth of seb and clora's daughter and seb's reaction to clora almost dying in childbirth, and the third is about dealing with a fussy newborn lewis😭🥹THEY'RE SO GOOD AND SWEET AND SOMEWHAT SAD (not to mention beautifully written) so go check it out!!💖💖 )
#READ SO I CAN YAP TO SOMEONE ABOUT THEM🙏😩💘#the seb sickfic made me realize how much i needed barely functioning and sick seb (but him still trying to be tough)#theres also a part that cracked me up bc at one point seb is so sick he cant even see straight but he just thinks to himself:#eh its fine.... ill just ask ominis how HE functions without vision later🤷 LMFAO#so stubborn...JUST LET CLORA TAKE CARE OF YOU MFER🤺🤺🤺#defs gonna be drawing more from it especially sick seb LMAO but also seb having a tea party with celeste🥹🥹#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x oc#sebastian sallow x mc#sebastian x mc#hogwarts legacy fanfiction#sebastian sallow fanfiction#hphl#choccyart#also i was never planning on writing anything about clora giving birth or abt the kids so to be able to read it WAS AMAZING#THERES A PART WHERE SEB IS HOLDING CELESTE AND CRYING AT CLORAS BEDSIDE THAT I NEED TO DRAW😭😭#LIKE SRSLY seb being conflicted and not even wanting to HOLD celeste bc he doesnt know if clora is alive or not... IT WAS SO SAD BUT GOOD#i honestly dont know what seb would do if clora died in childbirth tbh.......i could honestly see him resenting celeste#esp since she looks so much like clora😭😭#LETS JUST NOT THINK ABOUT IT!😃👍#(still thinking about it)#like this line in the fic: “Sebastian hesitated; if this was Clora’s last gift to him he wasn’t sure he wanted it.”#😭😭😭ITS SO GOOD UGHHHHH😭 TY AGAIN FOR WRITING THESE💖IM SO TOUCHEDDD💖💖
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I just realized Stan has a crack in his glasses in your newest Instinct page
Now he and Ford match <3
#ask#owlfacenightkit#cracked glasses gang#now i kinda want to keep the idea…#maybe in way future stuff as a call back?#idk :’)#i feel like they would have other pairs#…maybe#stanley pines#stanford pines#stan twins#sea grunks#sketches#my art#stan pines#ford pines
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anyone else have multiple traumatic memories associated specifically with holidays/family vacations? because that is a topic I never see discussed in all the So You Had A Shitty Childhood, Now What? self-help books i've been reading. but for me, it was a significant thing. and the more i think about it the more it seems like this would be an (unfortunately) common experience. would be grateful to hear if this matches other peoples' experiences...
#not a shitpost#serious post#ask to tag#tw trauma#cptsd#c-ptsd#and if so we should TALK about it#because it means there are a whole group of survivors out there whose mental health regularly worsens during holidays#like i know i am most certainly not the only person who feels an undefined Dread hanging over christmas/my birthday/july 4 etc#bc too many shitty things happened during those times and now my brain is hypervigilant bc traditionally these are the Danger Times#and this seems like it would be particularly common for survivors of abusive/dysfunctional households (aka most people with c-ptsd)#because holidays/vacations typically mean 1) the whole family is together/being forced to interact#2) and undergoing external stressors e.g. travel/relatives aka 'outsiders' visiting/routines & coping mechanisms being interrupted etc#3) there is social pressure for this to be a Fun Family Bonding Experience which only highlights the cracks in the foundation#and exposes the common Everything Is Fine/We Are A Happy Family lie#4) the cognitive dissonance of feeling tired/anxious/stressed/afraid during a time when you are 'supposed' to be Making Good Memories#and then everyone is angry/tired/anxious/triggered and things boil over and something or someone goes Very Wrong#weird that i'm posting this in october when halloween is...sort of the ONLY holiday i have only good and happy feelings towards#i got lucky there#also i have positive feelings towards Labor Day but that's for socialist reasons
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You what…?
Includes: Gojo,Geto, Nanami, Choso,Toji,Sukuna.
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk fake texts#jjk smau#smau#jjk gojo#jjk x reader#jjk geto#jjk suguru#jjk sukuna#jjk fluff#crack#silly#first post#taking requests#feel free to ask questions#be easy on me guys
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Possessive Castiel with a marking kink makes me feral
#marked his brothers vessel no less#cas rebuilt Dean to be his own man. not Michael’s#dean asking cas to put the handprint back while they’re having sex is my favorite headcanon#destiel#castiel#spn#supernatural#dean winchester#deancas#misha collins#jensen ackles#spn crack#handprint#hand print#cockles#spn 4x01#4x01#6x03#spn 6x03#spn 15x18#15x18#marking kink#gay#dean posting#cas posting#casposting#deanposting#my writing
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*points at ur pussy* are u gonna finish that? *tummy growls really loud*
#disclaimer I’m running on two hours of sleep ‘n 3 monster energy-#but like- I HAD TOO#also what kinda ask is that??? 😭#y’all are getting WILD again jsksjksjs#obey me!#obey me shitpost#obey me beelzebub#obey me beel x reader#om!#obey me#obey me crack#ro’s dumb stuff tag!#anon!#beelz <333#does this count as smut????#obey me smut#smut#beelzebub smut#< just in case ig-
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Reverse trope
where instead of the Bats forgetting that they’re adopted (something actual adoptees do on occasion and is hilarious) they forget that some of them *cough Damian cough* aren’t
_______
Jason in the heat of a probably ridiculous argument: Yeah well YOU’RE adopted!
Tim just as invested in said argument: So are YOU! We all are!
Damian who had previously been quietly watching this unfold while he drank his tea: Actually I’m not
Tim and Jason who didn’t realize he was there but are already DoneTM: …… Damian continuing to sip his tea entirely unbothered: :)
Damian: Because I’m not an orphan-
Jason: ok, yoU KNOW WHAT-
____
or like in their group texts (that we know they have thanks to Nightwing (2016) #79)
*Steph changed the group chat name to “Bruce Wayne’s Personal Orpanage”*
Jason: Really?
Steph: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Steph: It’s the truth Damian: Both my parents are very much alive
Steph: Shhh you don’t count
Cass: Mine too Duke: Technically so are mine
Barbara: I still have a dad so there’s that
Steph: YOU GUYS ARE RUINING THE JOKE
Tim: Stephanie aren’t BOTH of your parents alive???
Steph: KNOW WHAT? FINE
*Steph changed the group chat name to “The Technicality Police”*
Tim: well that’s more accurate at least
Steph: :)
_____
Damian in his 10th argument with Tim of the day: That’s- this is-
Tim in full Antagonizing Big Brother mode: I’m listening
Damian -a Gen Z and best friend to Jon Kent- extremely frustrated: This is such Motherless behavior!
Tim taken aback: [voice cracking] W-what-?
Damian who didn’t mean to say that but doubling down anyway because his bloodline doesn’t believe in admitting mistakes: THIS! This is such Motherless behavior!
The rest of the family who is also motherless: :O
Cass whose been spending way too much time with Meme Queen Stephanie Brown and not involved in the argument but finding it entertaining regardless: [nodding along seriously] Facts
Tim: [visibly betrayed] CASS WHAT-
A video copy of the interaction gets sent out anonymously to the entire family. Barbara is the prime suspect but there is no proof as of yet (and they will never find any)
Steph, Cass, and Duke continue to respond “Motherless behavior” everytime one of the bats does something they deem questionable/insane. It is said often
It only stops when one night in the middle of patrol. Batman is in full Dark Knight mode (possibly in the middle of threatening someone) and descends from the ceiling into the middle of a warehouse drug deal, dark cape billowing out behind him-
and Steph just automatically whispers “Motherless behavior” forgetting her com was still very much on
She immediately realizes what she said and frantically apologizes but it’s too late.
Bruce just- Blue Screens. Completely stunned into silence
Dick -who was unfortunate enough to be the one teamed up with Batman tonight- is fighting for his life to choke back his laughter
Jason doesn’t even try to stop his and has collapsed to his knees from lack of air from how hard he’s laughing. Cass try’s half heartedly patting his back to help to no avail
The criminals are terrified into surrender from The Red Hood just laughing hysterically at seemingly nothing while Batman just Stands There
Damian ends up being the only one still functioning enough to continue arresting everyone, though he is privately amused and strangely proud
Tim and Barbara have saved both the com recordings and cowl footage to at least three different servers and sent it to absolutely everyone before Batman even recovers
Duke finds out second hand the next morning and is furious he missed the chance to see it in person. He declares he is moving to the nightshift so it doesn’t happen again. (He is all talk and goes to bed by 9 pm)
Bruce bans the phrase for life and promises swift and server punishment to anyone who dares to use it again
#Like it’d be so funny#Imagine them on mothers day#Damian at unnecessary volumes: I AM LEAVING TO GO TO VISIT MY MOTHER NOW#Damian: WHERE SHE LIVES.#His brothers on their way to the cemetery or smth: ._.#Damian still going regardless: BECAUSE SHE IS ALIVE#I just know Damian “Certified Mama’s Boy��� Wayne would be such a menace about it#And Duke Babs Steph and Cass would so help fan the flames#batfam#dc comics#fanfiction#headcanon#chat fic#Can you tell I read them often#And yes adoptees forget they’re adopted#I have a friend who has on multiple occasions started to tell me about something that “ran in the family”/something in her family history#Before she’ll remember she’s not actually blood related#someone has probably already done this#But I still thinks it’s very funny#No I don’t think Jon would say motherless behavior to someone#But I do think he’d know the phrase and teach Damian#I just imagine he educates him on all the Gen Z lingo don’t ask why#crack post#100% a joke dont take it seriously
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being grounded from devices means nothing when you have a robot boyfriend
#i think im getting better with different angles#its obviously not perfect but this is like 1 of 3 times i've ever drawn a character at this angle#n was unreasonably hard to get right here but uhmm i figured it out hopefully#she IS winning. gamer pro#real talk. n would be cracked at fps games. he's been living like one for at least a couple years#he also sits in the tism way. it just feels right i think#dont ask how uzi's playing on that controller she doesnt know either#art#murder drones#murder drones uzi#murder drones n#serial designation n
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Jason being the easiest kid is super funny. Bruce looking at Jason and remembering Dick at 18: “we can work through this. He’ll come around if I don’t give up on.”
Bruce, watching over a freshly street-snatched Jason: Why is he so calm
Having Dick as the rambunctious, feral, and unhinged first child must've given him SO much whiplash once Jason entered the picture. Lil guy just vibed in his own world. Just reading books and doing schoolwork. Baby Jason hurt nobody.
Bruce will just be going over the ground rules of the manor, remembering all the chaos Dick brought upon the household.
Bruce: No swinging from the chandelier.
Jason: ?? I wasn't planning to?
Bruce: No murder.
Jason: What? That never even crossed my mind-
Bruce: And please, for the love of God, don't sneak out and try to beat up the nearest criminal on our block
Jason:
Jason: WHO is responsible for these rules being created??
Bruce will just come home from a long day of work. He's tired and just wants a nice, quiet evening, but he's subconsciously psyching himself up to prepare himself for the chaos he'll witness once he enters the manor
but then Jason's just quietly doing his own thing, maybe even helping Alfred with some chores, reading, or just lounging about in the manor. In general, just causing no trouble and Bruce just turns to Alfred, all worried like, "Is he sick? I don't think children are supposed to behave this way."
#Bruce putting 'No chandeliar swinging' before 'No murder' speaks volumes of the battles he's faced#baby jay was just a lil guy :')#Bruce having a wholesome relationship with jason from the very start: I didnt know this was possible#Bruce and robin!jason were so soft like please read the 80s comics they were SO cute fnksjvkosk#Dick visiting for the very first time since he left home: Why the FUCK is it so peaceful here#Dick not being angry about Jason becoming robin but instead being angry that his new brother isnt driving Bruce up the wall:#'are you even WORTHY of being my successor?? WHERE is your drive?'#jason todd#bruce wayne#batman#red hood#robin!jason#dick grayson#nightwing#batfam#batdad#batfamily#batkids#incorrect quotes#dc#crack#fanatical asks#fanatical posting#sidenote anon i am so sorry for not answering this earlier i always forget to check my asks ;-;
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now you can draw just like me
#doodles#sorry it just cracks me up a little people asking me how I draw noses cause it's just three whole lines#“how do you draw eyes” it's a half circle and then a circle inside that
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i had a dream that this meme existed with them and i had to make it please take it
matching icons for you and your *reads crumpled up note tossed in my direction* WIFE???
free to use these as pfp just like + credit pretty please or ill bite
#guilty gear#gg#elphelt valentine#elphelt guilty gear#nagoriyuki#lainys art#is this ship? is this queerplatonic? is it crack? i dont know theyre everything dont ask me questions just go see elphelt in concert NOW
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I may not understand how Davrin Dragon Age's clothes work yet but I do have a comprehensive knowledge of cleavage and a deep desire to figure out how to paint digitally
#dragon age#dragon age veilguard#dragon age the veilguard#da4#davrin#warden davrin#dragon age fanart#I don't like how the ear turned out but I spent way too long on this to change anything else#ugh don’t ask me how long it took for me to do#great googly moogly I just cracked my back like a glow stick#my art#hmmm the neck looks weird....oh well!#the hair could be better too I actually think it's more actually black than brown#I set a timer and I reached the timer I'm no longer working on this#this is why I need more pictures of him BioWare
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"oh please purchase the movies/shows you've been pirating uwu face"
how. where. where am i supposed to purchase movies/shows that do not ever get physical releases because streaming services would rather you pay to access them only to completely remove them on a whim?
piracy is media preservation and I'll die on this hill
#One's Notebook#genuinely where am i supposed to buy some of the things i watch#most of them have no physical release to purchase#and some of them that do only have region locked releases so they're obviously not meant for me without doing more unintended cracking#and others are locked behind paywalls streaming wants you to pay so they can bankrupt everyone in their impossible ploy to make profit#i'm not paying 14.99 a month to watch one or two shows every 6 months that's ridiculous to even ask that#and anyone who thinks this is fine is a fuckign brown nose boot licker#because you can't JUST pay 14.99 for one service#you have to pay 14.99 for EVERY service on the off chance you want to watch something
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Omggg Nana I'm so happy that you're back!! so I wanted ask for either a small imagine of any member or a text reaction of them accidentally receiving readers sexual toys package, but before dating 🙊
Seventeen member reacts to receiving your sex toys/tools in the mail
Warning: obvious reference to nsfw items and activities
REQUEST GAME
#thediamondlifenetwork#svthub#nana writes#asks games#asks#anon asks#seventeen smau#seventeen fake texts#seventeen reactions#seventeen fluff#seventeen#seventeen imagines#seventeen crack
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