#[was fighting for my life on some of these answers lmao but if any of u know indonesian u can probably gather a bit more than i can] | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

ponderingmoonlight · 10 months ago

Text

Sharing a bed with kny men

Pairings: Yoriichi x fem!reader; Sanemi x fem!reader

Word Count: 5,7k (lmao)

Warnings: injury in Yoriichi's part, smut in Sanemi's part so read if you're 18+, this is a long ass fic y'all, not proofread

This is actually my first time posting Sanemi smut and I'm super scared. Let me know what you think 🥹🤍

Also, do you want me to do other characters too?🫶

Yoriichi

I heard you @laurencrsnt 🫶

All your life, you never even thought about the possibility that maybe, you’ll encounter a demon someday. Why you, out of all people? Why especially you?

Even now with its cold eyes glaring down at you and your shoulder ripped open by its claws, you fail to find an answer for that. Is it your fate to die right here, when you only went out at night in order to buy medicine for your little sister who has fever? Is dying the cruelest death really your destiny when you wish for nothing more than growing old and watching your own children live their lives?

It’s unfair.

You shouldn’t lay here, crumpled onto the still wet street. You shouldn’t feel the sensation of your eyes watering, your hands trembling, your heart racing.

This shouldn’t be your last day walking on this earth. You didn’t even have the chance to find the man of your dreams yet…

It’s ridiculous and you know it, that spark of determination that rushes through your bones. All of the sudden you spring back onto your feet and start running. Out of the city, away from the lit streets straight into the dark woods.

Even if you have to die here, you won’t give up this easily. You won’t allow this demon to end your life without putting up a fight.

“Why do you girls always think you can run away, huh? It’s too easy to sweep you off your feet”, the demon behind you comments dryly.

With a swift motion of his hand, it digs open your tender flesh all over again, sends your violent scream echoing through the lonely forest. You fall to the ground like a bag of rice, your torn leg now refusing its service completely.

“Let me go!”, you shriek in horror.

No, you don’t want to die here, you just want to go back to bed and forget about this.

But the forest ground isn’t your bed and the demon in front of you who’s ready to slice through your throat isn’t only a nightmare.

Your heart sinks to the floor, body suddenly feeling numb and lifeless. You will die here.

“I’ll keep you in good memory. Well, at least for tonight”, the demon jeers at you.

You close your eyes, desperately try to imagine your little sister. She’ll find herself a loving husband and her very own family without any doubt. Even without you around, her life will turn out alright. Even without you around, life goes on. You don’t have to feel sad or guilty, you just have to let go…

“Get away from that woman.”

A low male voice, so charismatic that you think you might dream. He sure must be handsome. Men with voices like that always have a matching face.

A slicing blade, a dull thud. But no claws that dig into your flesh one last time, no bow of relief that you’ve been awaiting for quite some time by now. Your eyelids start shivering. When is this finally over?

“Are you alright? Please allow me to help you up.”

The second something touches your skin, your eyes snap open in an instant. But they aren’t greeted by those venomous red orbs from earlier. No, these ones are soft but strong and have that calming fuchsia color. This isn’t a demon.

This is a man.

“Don’t be afraid. The demon is gone”, he continues speaking with his low voice.

You have no control over your own body and shivering limbs. It’s impossible for you to say a single word. Are you really out of danger? Is it really over?

When he pulls you off the ground, a violent scream escapes your lips. No, you don’t want to die, you don’t want your life to end tonight. Not like this, not without saying goodbye.

“Please calm down, everything is alright now”, the stranger tries to reassure you, but his words don’t even reach your ringing ears.

You gasp for air like a fish on land, forehead now covered in ice cold sweat. This can’t be your end.

If Yoriichi doesn’t act now, you might faint due to your stress. But what is he supposed to do? You don’t seem to listen to his words and touching you might only make it worse. Maybe you need, assurance?

“I won’t hurt you, see? My hands have no intention of doing you any harm.”

Gently, he glides his fingertips up and down your uninjured harm. Despite the look of horror on your face and your gaping wounds, you do have a lovely face and truly remarkable eyes.

“I came here to help you”, he continues until his fingertips finally brush over your tear-soaked face.

What is this feeling of warmth deep inside his chest? You aren’t the first woman he saved from the claws of a demon.

“I would like to accompany you on your way back home-“

“No”, you suddenly blurt out.

Even though lying in bed on your own was all you were able to think about just a few moments ago, the thought feels like a threat now. What if another demon follows you back home? What if your little sister gets attacked because of your foolishness? No, you simply can’t go back now. But on the other hand…Just the thought of sleeping alone here in the woods runs shivers down your spine.

“I…I’ll find a place to stay. Otherwise…they might harm my sister…”, you mutter.

“Allow me to escort you to my estate, then.”

You yank your head to the side in sheer disbelief, eyes searching for a spark of humor in his calming orbs. Is he really serious about that? After all, you’re a stranger. He doesn’t even know your name. Now that you think of it…who is this?

“How can I know for sure that you aren’t a demon yourself?”

“Take my hand”, he instructs you gently.

Is this really a good idea? You take a deep breath in, try to calm down your pounding heart. What do you have to lose?

When your shaky fingers wrap themselves around his much larger hand, you get ingulfed by warmth. His palms feel rough but also comforting against your bruised skin.

“Demons are cold since they are dead”, he explains briefly.

“But I am not. I am a demon slayer. It is my only destiny to safe innocent souls from their death.”

Oh. Your gaze drifts towards a katana that hangs dangles from his belt. No, demon don’t find with those weapons. So, are those words really true?

“You…You want to help me?”

“I’d love to help you if you allow me to.”

What has gotten into him? Did he really offer you to hold his hand, let alone to sleep at his house so you don’t have to fear the night on your own? Never in his life, Yoriichi allowed himself to develop feelings apart from empathy for those around him.

But those eyes. Those eyes of yours really captivate him, devour him fully. How is he supposed to leave you out here, soaked in your own blood with bruises all over your body?

“You…really would?”

Is this really okay? When you were a child, your mother told you over and over that you aren’t allowed to talk to strangers, let alone man.

But…does that also include the handsome, charismatic and armored ones?

“I keep my word. Also, your wounds need care as well. Please, allow me to help you.”

What do you have to lose.

“If that’s the case, I’d love to take your offer”, you reply shyly.

“I’m glad to hear that. I will show you the way-“

A loud groan escapes your lips before you’re able to stop it. His charismatic eyes almost made you forget about the gaping wound the monster from before inflicted on you.

Almost.

“You shouldn’t move your leg with a wound like that. I will carry you to my estate.”

“You will…carry me?”, you mutter with widened eyes.

But just when you try to take a step forward, his words become painfully clear. No, there really is no way you’ll be able to walk anywhere with that leg. But allowing him to carry you?

“I might be a little heavy.”

“Let me assure you, you aren’t heavy at all.”

“Fine…”, you grumble.

“But only a few meters.”

Gently, he stranger wraps his arms around your shoulder and knees before he starts walking.

He smells good. Like a field of flowers on a sunny day. And the way his heart beats against your cheek reminds you that you’re still alive, that you survived somehow.

This man saved you.

“I didn’t even thank you.”

“There’s no need to thank me. This is the least I can do for you after I almost came too late.”

He stares blankly at the blood that still drips from your leg. Just a few seconds later and that demon would have killed you with him simply watching. Why? Why is he not able to save them all, why is he still not good enough to stop this madness?

“Don’t tense up, don’t think anything less of yourself because I was injured. I was a fool for leaving the house this late at night on my own.”

Despite the fact that cold sweat still runs down your forehead and even though your fingertips still shake in shock, you cup his cheek and force his troubled eyes to look at you.

“I am beyond thankful for my rescue. The worst thing about dying today would have been leaving my little sister behind. But you saved me. And not only that, you even offered me a safe place to stay for the night. I really don’t know if…If I’d be able to sleep on my own tonight…”

The stranger doesn’t say a word, his eyes roaming around your face without a real aim.

“Oh, I didn’t even ask. What’s your name?”

“My name is not important-“

“I’m (y/n)”, you introduce yourself friendly.

“My…my name is Yoriichi”, the man carrying you mumbles.

Yoriichi. An unusual name that you’ve never heard before.

“That name suits you well.”

“We’ll arrive soon. I hope you don’t expect a big mansion since I am living in a rather small cottage-“

“I’m living in a tiny barrack in the city. A house in the woods sounds like a dream”, you mutter.

The second you open your eyes again, you find yourself in a wooden cabin with a plain futon lying on the floor and an improvised kitchen in the back of the house. Nothing special, very fitting for the man who gently lowers you onto the futon.

“I will take care of your wounds now”, he announces before taking off his haori and katana.

Without his threatful weapon dangling from his belt, he looks like a normal man.

If it wasn’t for those captivating eyes. He has to be the most breathtaking man you’ve ever seen.

“Fortunately, the cut on your leg isn’t deep. I’ll disinfect the wound and bandage it”, he explains briefly before his skilled hands spring into action.

“You really are good at everything”, you comment.

He’s so gentle that even the alcohol that disinfects your wound doesn’t seem to burn. Why have you never stumbled across him? You were so sure that you know each and every man around that it almost drove you insane. But him? He’s different from all the others. He’s truly special.

“You will have to take your kimono off. I need access to the wound on your shoulder.”

Oh.

“Y-yeah, sure…”

Hesitantly, you pull the blood-soaked fabric down your shoulder so that only your chest is still covered. Yoriichi’s eyes seem to gleam in the moonlight like liquid metal.

“You look lovely”, he flusters into the night.

He doesn’t know what has gotten into him. Is it the alcohol rising up his nose, the smell of blood that radiates from your bruised body that makes him say those strange things?

No. It has to be because of those eyes of yours. Those eyes that captivated him from the moment he first saw them.

"Thank you," you stammer, your cheeks flushing as you nervously tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.

"You too," you add quickly, immediately regretting your awkward response.

Both you and Yoriichi swallow hard, the atmosphere in the room suddenly changing.

“I am finished. You should rest for tonight. After all, this was a draining fight for you”, he mutters while getting up.

You let out the breath you didn’t know you were holding, heart still hammering so roughly against your ribcage that you’re almost sure he’s able to hear it. What was this tension?

“But…this is your futon-“

“You are my guest. Of course, I will sleep on the floor on the other side of the room.”

Oh. A wave of disappointment rushes over you before you’re able to stop it. What were you expecting, secretly hoping? That this man will share a bed with you?

Honestly, yes.

“You…you really don’t have to…”

Oh, how much Yoriichi wished he wouldn’t have to.

“I insist on taking the floor.”

“I actually want you to sleep by my side. Please.”

The begging tone in your voice stops him mid-track.

“This night was…horrible. A little company would definitely help, if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t mind at all”, he replies a little too hasty.

“I just don’t want to invade your personal space. After all, I’m a stranger.”

“A really kind stranger”, you add shyly.

Are you acting out of line? You shouldn’t push him to sleep next to you when his offer to let you sleep here is already generous enough, right?

“Forget my question, I was acting out of line-“

“No, not at all. I would love sleeping besides you.”

He crosses the room in an instant and kneels down next to you.

“But let me know whenever I become too much.”

What a ridiculous thought. Why would he ever become too much? Him, your savior, that remarkable man.

You scoot over until your back is pressed against the cool wall, eyes still fixated on his gleaming eyes. Will you really be able to sleep tonight when this is the first time ever a man lies beside you?

And what a handsome one on top.

“You should try to sleep now. Nothing will happen to you as long as I am here”, he reassures you.

That is the least he can do after failing to protect you in the first place.

“Again, thank you for all of this. I definitely own you a favor”, you mumble.

Suddenly your lids start to get heavy, your mind slows down bit by bit. Maybe this rough night really took its toll on you. Is It the safety he radiates, his calming smell? In the matter of seconds, only your low and even breath is heard.

Finally, Yoriichi is able to allow himself a closer look at you. You look so peaceful and innocent with a face so remarkably beautiful that he can’t stop staring. You have to be the prettiest woman he’s ever seen. A man like him really doesn’t deserve lying next to a woman like you. Maybe he should give you space, leave you now that you fell asleep-

With a quiet groan, you draw closer to him in your sleep until your head rests on top of his chest and with your arms wrapped around his upper body.

He doesn’t dare to move an inch, eyes widen in utter surprise. Is this…cuddling? His mind races back and forth, eyes resting on your calm features. What is he supposed to do now?

Hesitantly, he allows his hand to rest on your back. What an unknown sensation, all those feelings that rise up his chest right where your hand rests.

For the first time since forever, he is the one who feels safe.

He is the one who feels loved.

He is the one who feels warm.

And you? You cuddle yourself against him until the sun rises all over again.

Sanemi Shinazugawa

This one's for you @muichirolover14 🤍

“This is bullshit”, the man walking next to you mumbles under his breath.

“Keep focused. It was Kagaya-sama’s personal wish that the two of us go on this mission together”, you mumble with a fake smile decorating your bright red lips.

And that’s the only reason why you agreed in the first place. Why else would you pretend to be Sanemi Shinazugawa’s personal concubine if it wasn’t for Kagaya-sama and this undercover mission?

The plan is pretty simple. Countless people, including other demon slayers, lost their lives in this little innocent village that becomes a red-light district at night. Nobody knows why or who is responsible for this.

One of the upper moons, maybe.

It just made sense to dress you up as a concubine. After all, you are the light hashira, a mighty swordswoman and probably the most talented out of Mitsuri and Shinobu when it comes to acting.

And then there’s him. You glance at Sanemi’s annoyed face from the side. Why on earth did Kagaya-sama choose him? What about Rengoku, Giyu, Obanai, Tengen, Gyomei? Aren’t they a way better fit?

You sign to yourself.

Truth is, they aren’t. While Rengoku, Obanai, Tengen and Gyomei would stand out immediately, Giyu would never be able to sell you as his concubine. No, no one except the wind hashira is able to make this look natural.

No one but him looks this good in a dark green kimono.

What?

“Stop staring at me like that, brat”, he hisses through gritted teeth.

“I was just hoping you might disappear if I stare long enough, idiot”, you bite back in frustration.

Why does he always have to be so mean, though? You really tried to get along with him countless times, put on the most precious smile whenever you talked to him and made sure to always bring him ohagi whenever you had the chance to. But Sanemi Shinazugawa never stopped hating you. And eventually, a part of you started to dislike him as well. That one part though…

You allow your eyes a minor glimpse at his barely exposed chest. That tiny part deep within your head is somehow still drawn to him. And you hate it.

“Aren’t concubines supposed to shut up?”

“Watch your mouth or I’ll leave immediately.”

“Both of us know you wouldn’t do that.”

You let out your shaky breath, your hand crushing his while you wear the same friendly smile as before.

“Don’t mess with me, Shinazugawa”, you speak out with low voice.

His face tenses up ever so slightly, hand fighting for freedom out of your merciless grasp.

“You’ll regret talking to me like that when we’re alone, brat.”

-at the estate-

“I’d like to show you to my newest possession. Please introduce yourself”, Sanemi speaks out.

Like Amane-sama showed you, you bow in front of the man that looks you up and down with his filthy eyes.

“My name is Kiyomi”, you introduce yourself oh so sweetly.

“That name really suits you. What a beauty you are. I’m sure I’d find a lot of paying customers for you here”, the disgusting man purrs and stretches out his hand in order to touch your face.

“Don’t touch the goods”, Sanemi barks at him immediately before slapping his dirty hand away.

Who does this guy think he is, trying to touch you so casually? No. That jerk isn’t allowed to caress your face. The plain thought of men like him getting to put their hands on you…

Sanemi’s guts turn.

“Aren’t you here to sell her and yourself for the night? If that’s the case, she won’t be your good anymore for the next few hours but mine.”

He smiles at you through rotten teeth, his breath almost forcing you to choke. You are only here to detect the demon who is responsible for the countless deaths in this area. You don’t have to touch any of these men. None of them will touch you.

What about Sanemi, though? An uneasy feeling rises up your chest when your eye catches a group of women who stare him up and down with lust in their eyes. Will he allow himself a taste before continuing with this mission? Will he find a woman he is attracted to? All of them look flawless, too good to even consider the service of a paid men. But if that man looks like Sanemi…

“You will find your room to the right. This is where the female customers choose their good. After paying, you belong to them”, the man explains briefly while showing both of you around.

“Why would these women pay for the services of a man? This is a noble region that is well-inhabited by countless men”, you blurt out.

“It’s not about them being men. It’s about looks. Only the fine-looking men even get the chance to work here for the night”, he explains briefly.

Fine-looking man, huh? Well, there is no doubt in the fact that Sanemi suits that description way too good. With his firm muscles highlighted by scars from countless battles, he looks like a walking god. Let alone his perfect face, his eyes that now look soft and seducing without being irritated constantly. His white hair that frames his features perfectly.

“As for the women, we look for a broad variety of bodies, looks and personalities. You are very easy on the eye and mysterious. I’m sure countless customers will fall for that.”

“And what…what services do they expect?”

The man in front of you bursts out in hysteric laughter, you can feel Sanemi’s eyes piercing through your skull.

“What they expect? Intercourse and everything that revolves around it, of course! Do you think they pay you for some cuddles and nice words?”

You swallow hard. There is no need to do that, right? You’ll somehow shrug them off and investigate this place at night. Maybe you’ll find the demon right away and-

“Now, you are a fine-looking man. Who is this?”, a woman suddenly purrs out of the shadows.

“A new worker for the night”, the disgusting man explains with a dirty smile.

“Well, if that’s the case, I’ll definitely make a reservation.”

“It would be an honor, my lady”, suddenly replies in the same cheeky tone

Your guts turn in an instant, eyes narrowing slightly as you watch how a smile forms itself on Sanemi’s usual resting lips.

“What a gentleman he is. I cannot wait to meet you.”

“The honor is on my side, my lady.”

And then he steps in front of her. Elegantly, he grabs the hand she already holds out and kisses her knuckles. Your heartrate quickens, the warm flush that starts creeping up your face barely covered by your makeup.

Fucking asshole. So he’s acting like a jerk towards you all this time while treating other women like this? You hate the knot that forms itself in your throat, the disgusting feeling of disappointment that rushes over you.

Does he really hate you this much?

“Well, I think I should introduce myself to the customers as well. Have a pleasant night, Sir”, your monotone voice speaks out on its own.

With one last bow towards him, you follow the man into the women’s corridor without even gifting him a single look. Sanemi can’t help but furrow his eyebrows at your sudden reaction. Did you really want to get rid of him so badly? Maybe you’ll actually meet up with some of those guys and…

“Are you interested-“

“I will meet up with you later this evening, my lady. Please excuse me.”

Without another look or word, he storms into his assigned room and closes the door behind him.

Sanemi’s mind starts going insane. What if you actually like one of those guys? Or what if one of them hurts you, tries to force you into something you don’t want? He heard the worst stuff about places like this.

Fuck, he shouldn’t have let you go in the first place. Why you? This mission is way too dangerous for someone like you, for someone this gorgeous-

“I’m losing my fucking mind”, he mutters through gritted teeth.

“I can’t do this”, you breathe out in sheer panic while lying in bed.

No, just the thought of Sanemi having the fun of his life with that girl from earlier feels like ripping your beating heart out of your chest. Will he really share a bed with them?

If it’s for the mission, he definitely would. Nothing is greater than his urge to kill demons, especially when it comes to an upper ranked one. That little sacrifice wouldn’t stop him.

And it breaks your dumb heart.

A hard knock on the door rips you out of your running thoughts. Is this your first customer? All color drains from your face, eyes widen in horror with every bow against the wooden door.

“Just a moment”, your shaky voice shouts.

You…Do you have to look presentable? You have to think about the things you can tell him. Maybe you don’t even have to sleep with him, maybe this will distract you from the things Sanemi is probably doing right now.

You open the door.

And stare straight into the furious eyes of Sanemi Shinazugawa.

Before you’re even able to react, he pushes himself into your room and closes the door behind him before yanking you against the wall.

“What did you do?”, he hisses through gritted teeth.

Your heart starts hammering roughly against your ribcage. Him? Here?

“What the hell are you doing he-“

“Answer my question right now!”, he barks into your face.

“I didn’t do anything!”, you shriek.

“What the hell has gotten into you!?”

“Has somebody touched you?”

His rough hands start running up and down your neck, yank the sleeves of your kimono upwards in a haste.

“What?”, you breathe out.

What the hell is going on? Just when you managed to pull your arm away from him, he grabs your wrist again with his face only inches away from yours.

“Did somebody touch you?”, he screams into your face.

“No!”, you cry back.

“But why would you even care? It looked like you had plenty of fun!”

He shakes his head while looking at you in utter surprise and confusion.

“What non-sense are you talking now-“

“Did you sleep with that woman from earlier when I was gone?”

God, you hate the way your voice cracks in the middle of the sentence, you hate the way your eyes fill with hot tears. He came here to confront you with all those accusations while he was out there having the time of his life, while all you were able to think about is him?

“No, I didn’t sleep with anyone!”

“Stop lying to me!”

“You’re the only one I want!”, he suddenly blurts out breathlessly.

“What?”, you utter in hushed panic.

This has to be a cruel joke, an unforgiving way to stop you from doing anything. Sanemi Shinazugawa, wanting you?

“Since I first saw you with your fucking perfect face and so melodic voice, I can’t think about anything else! You, sleeping with some random guy while I’m just a few doors away. I can’t take it!”

He grabs your head with both hands, eyes staring at you so intensely that you feel like collapsing any minute. If that’s really true, if that’s really how he feels…

“But…I want you too”, you squirm.

“I always wanted you, Sanemi.”

His lips crash against yours with so much power that you almost fall over. Suddenly his hands are all over your body, tongue unforgiving as he discovers your mouth with a passion you’ve never felt before. You allow your very own hands to finally discover the deep valleys of his muscular back, to let your hasty fingertips wander over his tight chest.

It becomes unbearable. Everything starts to become unbearable. That minor gap between your bodies, the clothes that still deny you full access to his naked skin, the feeling of not having enough.

“I need more”, you whimper against his lips, not even knowing what exactly you’re asking about.

Sanemi lifts you up with ease, not even breaking the kiss when he pushes you onto the bed with his massive body lingering on top of you.

You feel like suffocating in the most exquisite way.

“I’ll give you whatever you want”, he breathes against your lips that now find your neck.

A whimper escapes your mouth before you can stop his, body rearing up underneath him.

“S-Sanemi!”

“Fuck”, he hisses before his dark eyes meet you again in distress.

“Tell me you want this.”

“I…what?”

You can’t produce a single logical sound, head still spinning from the unknown sensation that starts building up inside your stomach. Is this what desire feels like?

“Tell me you want this too. Tell me you want me.”

“I wanted you all this time”, you reply without thinking twice.

With a swift motion, you find yourself engulfed by his arms with his lips caressing yours all over again. Like in trance, you begin opening his kimono, expose his bare skin to your merciless eyes.

“You look so shamelessly good”, you whimper.

Oh, how often you pondered about how his chest feels like, if his scars are soft or as rough as his walls.

“Can I…?”

His hands grab the ends of your kimono, eyes staring down at you flustered. Is that blush creeping up his cheeks?

“It’s just…You know…I’ve never done this before…”, you stammer.

“Do I look like I did, idiot?”, he mutters while gently taking off your kimono until you lay underneath him.

Completely naked.

“I mean, yes…”

“No, I didn’t”, he barks.

“I guess I waited for someone special…”

“I did as well”, you reply in an instant.

Is this real or are you dreaming? Sanemi Shinazugawa laying on top of you fully nude. Sanemi Shinazugawa stating that he likes you. Sanemi Shinazugawa’s hand that start moving downwards…

Until he reaches between your legs and simply takes your breath away.

“Are you okay?”, he mutters, eyes filled with worry.

You nod absently, eyes rolling back into your skull. God, this feels like heaven. When a groan escapes his lips, you completely lose yourself. Out of instinct, you grab his neck and yank him even closer towards you, your hot breath clashing against his face.

“Sanemi!”

His name sounds like a prayer coming from your mouth, forces his fingers to move even faster. Is this good? Is he doing everything alright? Your whimpers grow louder and louder, nails digging into his now oversensitive skin with so much pressure that it threatens to burst. You look so gorgeous with your eyes pressed shut, your delicate mouth forming an “o”.

And then you burst right underneath him, scream his name over and over again with your legs shaking. He can’t wait no longer, can’t contain himself another second.

“I need you”, he mutters.

“Please, let me have you.”

“Yes”, you breathe out, mind still spinning when the firework that just exploded in your lower body slowly starts wearing off.

Until you feel him all over again. But this time, not his fingers. Your glossy eyes widen in utter surprise when he carefully stretches you out and disappears inside of you, hands holding onto him for dear life.

“Are you okay?”, he whimpers.

“Please…give me…more…”

He almost loses his mind, the new sensation almost eating him up alive. Countless nights, he dreamed about what it might be like to have you, what it would feel like. But the reality is so much better than any dream.

Sanemi picks up his pace and grabs your waist passionately in order to keep you in place. Over and over, again and again your sticky skin collides with his until he threatens to burst.

“You’re mine”, he presses out through gritted teeth while pounding into you.

“I’m all yours, Sanemi!”, you cry out, nails now leaving marks on his skin.

“I need…ah! I need you! Please!”

He knows exactly what you’re asking for. One last time, he picks up the pace while holding onto you for dear life.

Until finally, you scream his name. Finally, he’s able to let it all go.

“(y/n)!”

He collapses on top of you, his weight leaving you dizzy and unable to move. None of you dares to make a move, the only thing that’s filling the room being your shaky and sharp breaths.

“I love you, (y/n)”, Sanemi finally mutters, his hand caressing your cheek oh so gently.

“I love you too-“

“Mission report, mission report! Kagaya-sama requires a mission re- AH!”

“Get out of here right now!”, Sanemi barks at the crow that casually entered the room.

“WHAT IS GOING ON HERE!?”

“Get out!”, Sanemi screams on top of his lungs before yanking up and hunting the crow butt-naked through the room

Tags: @chilichopsticks @hellkaiserinphoenix @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly @beatrexworld

@froufrousnowman @hidazinie @tomiokathedepresso @poketrainer2270 @chaoticwinnercupcake

@lees-chaotic-brain @wordskeeper @polarbvnny @sugu-love @ryva @baku2345

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marie-swriting · 1 month ago

Text

Normal - Bucky Barnes

Marvel Masterlist

Summary : Following his therapist recommendation, Bucky decides to go to the library where books aren't the only things that interest him.

Warnings : this is just me romanticizing my job lmao, TFATWS!Bucky Barnes, a bit of angst, happy ending, mention of Bucky's traumas and nightmares, Raynor being a bad therapist, maybe some grammatical mistakes as English is not my first languaga, tell me if you see some or if I missed any warnings.

Word count : 4.6k

French version

Sitting on therapist Christina Raynor’s uncomfortable couch, Bucky’s gloved hands are intertwined and rest on his legs. He keeps shifting position, unease like he always is at every therapy session.

It’s a waste of time, that's what he keeps telling himself. He listens to his therapist repeating the same three damn rules and taking her notebook everytime he finally dares to open his mouth. He’s about to scream in frustration, he can feel it. If it was up to him, he would have stopped coming a long time ago.

“Do you ever leave your apartment?” Raynor asks, haughty.

“I come here every week, don’t I? And I go to the restaurant once a week,” Bucky replies, defensive.

“Alone, I imagine.”

“No with someone.”

“Miracles do happen!” she exclaims, ironic. “What else do you do?”

At her question, Bucky stays silent, staring at her. Raynor rolls her eyes and sighs.

“James, if you stay at home brooding, you’re not going to move on. You have to do normal things.”

“I haven’t known ‘normal’ for ninety years now, Doc.”

“You have to go out, have a hobby, see people, answer to Sam when he calls you, for example. Let people in. Believe it or not but not everyone wants to attack you.”

“Weirdly enough I always feel like this, I mean between the brainwashing, running away from the government and Thanos who made me lose another five years of my life, I don’t know why it’s the case,” he retorts before her therapist takes her notebook and starts writing. “Why do you do the notebook thing again? I said nothing wrong.”

“We’re done for today,” Raynor says, putting her pen down. “Do what I said, find yourself a hobby.”

To answer, Bucky sighs loudly which Raynor writes in her blasted notebook. Without glancing at her, Bucky stands up from the couch, just as grumpy as when he arrived, if not more.

On the way to his apartment devoid of any warmth, Bucky thinks back to what his therapist told him. A hobby? What an idea! He hasn’t had a hobby for so long that he doesn’t even know what he liked to do back in the forties, besides keeping Steve out of trouble. He searches for a pastime the whole night yet, nothing seems appealing. At this rate, he’ll end up improvising when she’ll ask him about what he did, it’ll be easier.

As everytime Bucky closes his eyes, he wakes up with a start, even more exhausted than he was before falling asleep. Only the noise and the light coming for the T.V. remind him he’s at home and not in one of his numerous nightmares. He has everything around him to feel safe and yet, his brain is still in fight or flight mode.

With difficulty, he stands from the ground and walks to the bathroom. In the room, he splashes water on his face and takes a moment to breathe. Once his breathing is calmer, Bucky goes back to the living room and sits on his makeshift bed on the floor. His eyes are set on the T.V. as he tries to distract himself, though his brain takes over and thinks a million thoughts at the same time. Bucky can’t keep track of all of them, though he’s used to it by now. He does the exercises Raynor taught him, it’s one of the few useful things he’s learned from therapy.

Bucky reminisces about Steve and the way he had managed to adapt to the future. Instinctively, Bucky’s eyes go to his jacket near the door where Steve’s notebook is. Although he uses it for a different purpose, Bucky tells himself maybe he should do like Steve and try to catch up with all the culture he’s missed. Before the war, he loved reading, maybe this could be his hobby again? Reading. But how can he do it? He doesn’t know what books have come out in the past decades and besides, reading won’t make him more social. He has to find a spot where he can read and meet people. Suddenly, he remembers the day his mother had made him and his sisters library cards in the neighbourhood library. He can still picture the way the place was arranged which reassures him - every memory he has in mind is a victory. The library seems obvious now, he has to go there, that might help him and Raynor will finally get off his back.

The next day, Bucky walks to the library closer to his place. Reluctantly, he enters the building. He just has the time to walk through the door when he hears your voice greeting him. Bucky nervously smiles before walking closer to you.

“May I help you, Sir?” you ask with a warming smile.

“Yes, I’d like to make a library card, please.”

“Sure, do you know how our library works?”

Considering last time he ever set foot in a library everything was done by hand, it’s as if Bucky knew nothing about it so he shakes his head.

“Not really.”

“First thing first, the card is free for every New York resident and to make the card, I’ll only need an ID and a proof of address. You can borrow fifty items at once and the loan lasts three weeks, except for magazines, it’s only one. If needed, you can renew your loan on the website, the app or you can ask us to do it. If you’re fourteen days late, you’ll be charged. You can also put items on hold in case they’re not available at a given moment and you’ll have seven days to come pick them up. Do you have any questions?” you question and Bucky needs a second to take in everything you said. “I know it’s a lot of information at once so don’t hesitate if you need any clarification.”

“I think I got it.”

“Perfect,” you say while he hands you the documents you need. “Thank you.”

On your computer, you start creating his file. You write down his full name first then you ask him if he has a preferred name he’d like to be included in his file to which he tells you his nickname. After hearing his answer, you can’t help but think these pieces of information sound familiar. You don’t know where you heard them yet his name and face aren’t unknown to you. You keep completing the information and as soon as you have to write down his birth date, everything makes sense. People born in 1917 and who look like your age aren’t something you see on a daily basis. You understand he’s Captain America’s best friend, you vaguely remember your history class about World War Two. However, even if you’re taken aback by the identity of the man in front of you, you don’t show anything so as to not make him uncomfortable.

Once you’re done, you hand him his library card with a big smile. Bucky’s right gloved hand brushes past yours and he quickly puts the card in his back pocket.

“Would you like me to give you a tour?” you propose.

“You probably have better things to do,” Bucky replies, shifting from one foot to the other.

“That’s what I’m here for, I don’t mind at all.”

Bucky is still hesitating, yet the minute he glances on his left and sees the size of the place, he feels overwhelmed. He’s about to refuse when he remembers he has to learn how to have an ordinary life again and being social is a part of it.

“If it’s not too much, then I’d love to, please.”

“Follow me.”

You leave your chair and stand in front of Bucky, enthusiasm written all over your face. You start talking about the first shelves in front of you and then walk through the library as if it was your home. Although Bucky struggles retaining what every corner is about, he has to admit he loves seeing your radiant face while you’re talking.

As opposed to him, you’re full of life and your passion for your work can be felt a thousand miles away. He listens to your every word, completely captivated by your voice. Once you’ve shown him the most important places, you turn to him.

“That’s it! Are you searching for something in particular? Or do you want to wander on your own?”

“Well, actually, I was told Tolkien published several books after The Hobbit and I would love to read them,” he says, scratching behind his neck.

“I’m going to show you where his books are,” you inform, walking toward the correct shelf. “So, I recommend you read The Lord Of The Rings trilogy which goes hand in hand with The Hobbit. The first book is this one, The Fellowship Of The Ring,” you explain, taking the item out. “The second must be currently unavailable but if you want, we can put it on hold for you or you can do it on the app at home.”

“I haven’t read in a long time, I don’t know how long it’ll take me to read. I think I’m just going to focus on this one first and I’ll see later.”

“As you wish,” you affirm, giving him the book.

This time, Bucky is careful not to brush your fingers, still struggling to feel comfortable with people touching him.

“I’m going to leave you alone now, you’ll probably want to look around for next time. When you’re done, come to me or one of my colleagues for the loan. Once again, if you have any question, don’t hesitate,” you finish.

“Thanks, for everything.”

“Don’t mention it. Enjoy your book.”

You give him one last smile before turning around and you go back to your desk. Bucky watches you leave, enthralled by your every movement. The minute you’re out of his sight, he quickly shakes his head and gazes at the books in front of him, searching for something else interesting to read for later.

Surprisingly, Bucky reads Tolkien’s novel in less than a week. He thought he’d need more time to get back to reading and Bucky can’t deny he’s pleased to see he fall back to one of his habits easily.

During his therapy session, Bucky talks about his trip to the library with a smug smile when Raynor starts to imply he surely didn’t listen to her. She has her eyes wide open before asking him about his outing. Without any surprise, Bucky goes straight to the point. He doesn't even mention you, the beautiful librarian who has slowly found his way into his mind.

At the end of his session, Bucky doesn’t go home right away, wanting to give back the book. He expects to see you, sitting behind the computer with a welcoming smile on your face, however it’s a woman in her fifties who greets him. Your colleague might be nice, Bucky would have preferred to see your face and as surprising as it may seem, he would have loved to tell you about his reading. Unfortunately for him, besides not seeing you, the last two Lord Of The Rings books aren’t available so he simply puts them on hold thanks to your colleague before going home, empty-handed.

As soon as Bucky gets the notification the books have arrived, he doesn’t waste a second before leaving his apartment. He can’t wait to keep reading, the last two weeks went by slowly.

As he arrives, he finds you at your usual spot behind your screen. You give him a big smile before going on the shelf behind you where all the items on hold are - when you saw the two books were for Bucky, you hoped to be here when he’d get them. Bucky doesn’t even have to show you his library card that you’re already doing the loan.

“I have to admit, I was disappointed to see the first book back, I was hoping to have your opinion on it when you were done,” you inform.

“Well, just like the first time I read Tolkien, he knows how to keep me on tenterhooks. Your recommendation was perfect,” Bucky answers, happy to know you’re curious to know what he thinks.

“The Lord Of The Rings is always a safe choice. So you want to read the last two books in a row?” you question, referencing the novel you still have in hand.

“Yeah, I have a lot of free time, so better to make the most of it.”

“You’re absolutely right. Here you go,” you add, giving them to him.

This time, Bucky doesn’t stop your hands from touching his, he even lingers for a second before taking the novels out of your hands, making this moment last which you don’t seem to mind. No matter if he can’t feel the softness of your skin through his gloves, he appreciates this closeness.

“I’d love to read them for the first time again,” you exclaim with nostalgia.

“Are they your favorite books?”

“They’re my childhood so yeah, they are. Everytime I read them, I just want to live an adventure just like them.”

“I get it,” Bucky genuinely smiles before looking at the clock behind you. “I have to go.”

“Oh, sure. Enjoy your books.”

“Thank you.”

Bucky awkwardly smiles one last time before leaving the place, his two books in his hands. Bucky is happy he saw you.

Even though your conversations don’t last, when he talks to you, he feels normal. With you, he’s just another person going to the library, not the ex-soldier who was turned into a weapon against his will. You bring him a sense of normalcy he never thought he could have and a part of him doesn’t know how to react to this.

Bucky hadn’t read this much in a long time. First of all, because he absolutely wanted to finish The Lord Of The Rings, but also because he wanted an excuse to go back to the library.

That day, Bucky has to go to therapy first. As always, he doesn’t feel like Raynor is helping him that much. Other than telling about the rules and making him feel guilty for not moving on, she doesn’t say anything new. Even telling her he’s making an effort by seeing people at the library isn’t enough for her anymore. She affirms he should go somewhere where he could exchange with people like a book club. No matter what he does, it’s never enough.

Consequently, he goes to your workplace, irritated. He keeps brooding at every step he takes, telling himself everything he wishes to say if this therapy had no consequence on his future. His annoyance increases the second he doesn’t see you at your desk. Maybe you took the day off? Or maybe you’re working in the backroom today? No matter the reason, your absence ruins his day.

At that moment, he realises your presence might be more important to him than he previously thought. His mood definitively depends on if he sees you or not. He finds himself pathetic. After all, you’re only friendly because it’s your job to be nice to the people who come talking to you. He’s not your friend or your acquaintance, he’s just another person coming to the library among others. Besides, even if you were friends, who says you’d be as attached to him as he is to you? You have a normal life, you have better things to do rather than hanging out with someone as broken as him. Bucky can’t even open up to his therapist so he doesn’t deserve your attention and he wouldn’t want it anyway. Bucky thinks he doesn’t deserve someone who cares about him and he wouldn’t want to drag them to the fight he always finds himself dragged into. You’re too full of joy to see only one percent of the horrors he has witnessed.

Bucky loudly sighs before walking toward the novels sections. There, he lazily searches for a title that could intrigue him. Though, nothing catches his eye. He’s too focused on his irritation and his self-deprecation to be interested in something else. Bucky keeps wandering until he hears a voice coming from behind him.

“Good afternoon, Sergeant Barnes. How are you today?”

“Oh, hi,” Bucky states, turning to you, his bad mood leaving his body in an instant. “No need to call me Sergeant, Bucky is enough. I mean, if you don’t mind. Sorry, it probably was inappropriate what I just said,” he adds, embarrassed.

“Don’t worry, Bucky,” you reassure him. “So,” you resume, enthusiastically, “you’re done with Tolkien?”

“Yeah, I finished it last night.”

Bucky nonchalantly gives you this information; however, he didn’t finish the book because he couldn’t put it down, but because his nightmares prevented him from feeling safe enough to sleep. Notwithstanding, you don’t need to know that. After all, you’re only the librarian.

“You’re searching for something new to read?”

“Yeah, but I have no idea what.”

“Oh, I can help, if you want to. And don’t say you don’t want to bother me, it’s literally my job.”

“I’d love your help, please,” Bucky accepts with joy.

“Do you want to keep reading Fantasy or do you want to try a new genre?”

“I’d like to try a new genre. Maybe Science-Fiction? I have always been fascinated by technologie we would develop in the future. I mean, I’m so fascinated by it it became my life,” he darkly jokes, before becoming serious again. “Anyway, what do you suggest?”

“I think you should start with the basics. I suppose you’ve already read some H. G. Wells?”

“Yes, I read some of his books but there were others I kept telling myself I should read and never did.”

“Like any self-respecting reader would. I recommend you should try The Dream or The First Men In The Moon.”

At the same time you say the titles, you take the books out of the shelves. You hand them to Bucky and he’s disappointed once he realizes your hand didn’t touch his like last time. However, he quickly focuses back on what you’re saying, not wanting to be more unsettled.

“I haven’t read them in quite some time but I remember I loved them! I couldn’t stop talking to my loved ones about these books for months. My poor mom was tired of me by the end. If you want to discover a whole new author, I suggest Stephen King and his novel Firestarter. King is one of the most famous authors nowadays and he has a long list of books. He writes a lot of horror so if you want to try this genre, you can look for him.”

“I’m going to start with Wells, I know him so it’ll be easier, I think,” he says, showing the books he’s holding.

“We have other books of his that aren’t currently available, don’t hesitate to tell me if you want to put them on hold.”

“I will, thanks a lot.”

“Don’t mention it,” you exclaim with enthusiasm.

“Y/N, can you come?” one of your colleagues asks. “I need your help for tomorrow's activity.”

“I’m coming,” you reply to her before turning to Bucky. “You’ll tell me what you think about it, will you?”

“I will,” he affirms, feeling his heart missing a heartbeat in his chest, realizing you’re genuinely interested in his opinion.

“Enjoy your book.”

On those words, you walk away from Bucky before listening to your colleague. Bucky gazes at the books you suggested and he reads the back covers. Convinced by The Dream, Bucky puts the other one down before borrowing the novel.

In his apartment, Bucky thinks back to your interaction. He could have listened to you talk about books for hours. Though, the more he thinks about you, the less he’s sure it’s a good idea to be this close to you. Despite yourself, you bring him comfort and according to him, he doesn’t deserve it. His demons are too present to let the light come in his life. Bucky keeps overthinking and he ends up closing himself off.

The small effort he did when he created his library card is shattered. He still has a lot of improvement to do before getting closer to you. He began having feelings for you quicker than he thought and he has to stop this. As a consequence, Bucky decides to not see you again and for this, he tells himself that after this book, he will bring it back the day he knows you’re not here and he won’t step foot on your workplace ever again. He’s better off alone.

Nevertheless, Bucky’s isolation was interrupted by the arrival of John Walker as the new Captain America and the Flag Smashers. With Sam and after a few snags in this new collaboration, they found a way to calm down the tensions and Bucky finally made peace with his past.

Now, he accepts he has the right to comfort, to be okay. He hates to admit it nevertheless his therapist was right, opening up to people he trusts is beneficial and he’s lucky that, despite his grumpiness, Sam didn’t give up on him.

Bucky is in Louisiana at the Wilsons' residence. He manages to meet other people and his smiles are more genuine than ever.

One afternoon, while Sam and Bucky are fixing the Wilsons’ boat, Bucky brings up his outing at the library and your name comes up several times which instantly grabs Sam’s attention. With a malicious look, Sam mentions the topic again.

“Looks like you get along well with the librarian.”

“She’s nice. She has good recommendations and she’s full of energy. Thanks to her, I felt like I was having an ordinary life once more,” Bucky confesses with a loving gaze.

“‘Was’? What do you mean?” Sam asks, frowning.

“I haven’t gone to the library in a long time.”

“Why?”

“In case you forgot, we were a bit busy.”

“Oh, I know, but I feel like there’s something else.”

“Maybe…,” Bucky starts, avoiding his eyes, “Maybe I closed myself off when I realised I started having feelings for her.”

Following his confession, Sam stops what he’s doing and stares at his friend, desperate. Bucky sighs before resuming.

“Look, it’s not that easy, okay? Sure, I’m feeling better now, but the fact is I know a part of the Winter Soldier will never leave me. I still have my nightmares. I can’t have someone else drag into all of this,” he admits, his heart tightening in his chest. “I don’t even know why I’m making such a big deal out of it. She probably wasn’t interested in me like I am.”

“You’ll never know if you keep ignoring her.”

“I’m not ignoring her.”

“It sure looks like it,” Sam retorts with a pointed look. “You should talk to her. With what you told me, I can tell she has a good influence on you and besides, Mr-With-A-Staring-Problem has heart eyes for her.”

“I don’t need you to throw me into another woman’s arms so I won’t flirt with your sister,” Bucky jokes, hoping to aggravate Sam so he’ll change the subject.

“You better not flirt with her, period. Anyway, that’s not my point, you clearly have feelings for her and maybe it’s time you date someone and someone who has a normal life might not be such a bad idea,” Sam states and Bucky ponders his words for a second.

“I don’t know, Sam.”

“Ask her out. What do you gotta lose? She might be a good friend, if it doesn’t work romantically.”

“The last date I went to wasn’t my biggest achievement,” he reminds him.

“You weren’t in the right state of mind. You should try. At least, like this, I’ll be sure you won’t get close to Sarah.”

“I wanted to ask her something by the way,” Bucky adds, pretending to walk away.

“Fix the boat and shut up.”

Bucky laughs at Sam’s desperation and focuses back on his work. While they’re fixing the boat, Bucky thinks back about what Sam told him. He’s not going to lie, he thought about seeing you again, however the shame of coming back after being away for so long holds him back. The last time he saw you, you were so happy, telling he’d have to tell you what he thought of Wells’ novel and yet, he avoided you like the plague. He doesn’t really know how to come back. You won’t chase him away from the library, he hasn’t violated any rules, but surely, you’ll be cold with him. He ruined everything.

However, Bucky ends up being convinced by Sam’s words and decides to go back to the library the day he comes back from Louisiana. He thinks about what he’s going to tell you nevertheless nothing seems good enough so he decides he’ll improvise.

As soon as he’s arrived, he sees your colleagues at the front desk; he greets them and then walks around the shelves, hoping to find you which he does. From afar, he sees you putting kitchen books on a shelf. He takes a deep breath and walks to you. Once he’s near you, he clears his throat to catch your attention which startles you and you turn around. With just one glance, you discover Bucky without his jacket and his gloves for the first time, allowing you to see his vibranium arm.

“Oh, hi.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s okay. It’s been a long time! You didn’t even tell me what you thought about The Dream,” you say with a disappointed face.

“I loved it. I forgot how much I enjoy H. G. Wells’ books.”

“I’m glad to hear this. Do you want me to recommend something else?” you ask, excited.

“Yes, please.”

“Another genre or still Sci-Fi?”

“I thought about trying romance,” Bucky states, looking you straight in the eyes.

“Oh, well, we have a bit of everything,” you start, nervous, ignoring if you should read in between the lines. “Stories with sad endings, happy ones, relationships full of tensions and a lot of plot twists.”

“I was thinking about a story where the guy desperately tries to find a way to ask the beautiful librarian out,” Bucky adds with a charming smile.

“That’s a very specific story,” you reply with butterflies in your stomach.

“What do you say? Would you like to go on a date with me?”

“I’ve been waiting for this for a long time,” you confess, taking a step forward.

“Really?”

“Really. And I have to admit when I didn’t see you again, I thought maybe I had scared you off because I was too clingy. I thought you were ignoring me.”

“I was ignoring you, but not for this reason,” Bucky admits, looking down for an instant. “I had a lot of things to handle and I didn’t know how to act around you. You made me feel normal and it scared me. It’s better now, I’m better now, though some days are still harder than others. I think I’m on the right path.”

“Do you feel ready to let me in your life now?” you ask, wanting to make sure it’s what he wants.

“I am, yes.”

“Then, we can meet Saturday afternoon at the café down the block. They have the best pastries in the neighbourhood.”

“Works for me,” Bucky confirms with a radiant grin. “In the meantime, do you have any book recommendations? I need something to talk to for a date I have at the end of the week.”

“I have just the novel you need.”

Marvel Masterlist

143 notes · View notes

kira-fluff · 4 months ago

Note

More sharing the same bed hcs pls. those are really fun

of course, there's only one bed | fem!reader x osamu miya

a/n: i, too, indulge. 💕 I hope you like it. just realized this was one of my first fics. i love! sorry it's taken me so long to write this lol. it's been in my drafts for a MINUTE. also, i just decided to do osamu because it was getting too long to be more than just him lmao. i love him. i like to think he's a little bit of a smartass like his brother when he's really crushing on someone. a little sweet, but also plenty spicy. pairing: osamu miya x fem!reader tw: a lil' spicy mwah 💋 oh and language bc i can't not not say fuck you’re in love with him, but he doesn’t know that. then, of course, just because life hates you, you get stuck in a hotel room together on a group trip with him due to some “mix up”. and there’s only one bed. one. *sigh*… length: 2.5k pt 1

it was finally time for you to get some much needed rest. after you received your keycard from your class rep, you trudged languidly to the elevator with your luggage. at last you arrived at your door (you triple-checked to make sure it was, indeed, room 208). your card beeped, the door sensor's light turning green. sighing, you opened the door, expecting a room shrouded in darkness. instead, you are welcomed with the sight of osamu's broad, toned back, fresh out of the shower. naked. well, half-naked since he was wearing sweatpants (though you couldn't help but notice his boxers peeking slightly above his pants that lay low on his hips). your eyes grew wider as you watched the droplets of water drip down his spine. a big, veiny hand moved a towel through his dark hair. you swallowed. he turned around at the sound your presence. looking at you in a mixture of confusion and maybe, was that amusement? "lookin' for somethin'?" he questioned with an eyebrow raised. "ah, um. my room--" his brows furrowed, taking slow steps toward you. you backed away when he met your eyes, his chest centimeters away from pressing up against you. in your embarrassment, you missed a little smirk tip up his mouth. "lemme see it." you stared at him for a moment, processing his unbelievable propostion. "um, what?"

he breathed out a laugh. "yer keycard." you blinked, feeling foolish. flushing, you fumbled with the pocket of your jeans, at last presenting him with your keycard and its small envelope with the numbers "208" clearly written on the inside. "huh." was all he said, nodding to himself. "what do we do?" you asked nervously. you glanced toward the other side of the room, and indeed there was only one bed. one. you continued, "i mean... we can't share, can we? but this is supposed to be a fun trip so we won't get any sleep if one of us sleeps on the floor and there's not enough room in a different room and i think it's too late to wake someone up anyway and--" he stopped you with a gentle hand on your shoulder. "listen. don't worry 'bout it, 'kay?" gazing up at him, your quivering lip calmed, and you were able to take a small breath. your next breath caught in your throat, however, when you began collecting his things, grabbing his clothes, and stuffing them back in his bag. "osamu, what are you doing?" he looked at you incredulously, as if the answer was obvious. "'m packin' up my stuff. figure i can kick 'tsumu out of his room if i have to." "no, no, no! don't do that!" your voice growing louder, you rushed over to him, inadvertently placing your hand over his. "that's... you don't have to do that!!" his eyes met yours and remained there a moment longer than was probably necessary. then, he stood up, his hand brushing against yours. softly, he said, "well, 'm not gonna fight you on it." your heaving breaths calmed. "ok. ok. good. 'cause you don't need to do that." he laughed. "yer pretty scary when you're upset." "i'm not upset! i'm just... frazzled." his mouth quirked. "'frazzled?'" "well, i wasn't expecting a buff, naked guy to be in my hotel room!" nodding, he let out a hum of approval. "so you think i'm buff." you looked away. "that's-- anyway! where are we supposed to sleep?!" he thought for a moment. "hmm... probably on the bed. i think that's what they're used for." your gasped, "obviously! but, like, you're a man and i'm, you know..." "a woman?" he finished for you. "yes, and when men and women sleep together..." he held a hand up. "wait a minute. when you say 'sleep together', what exactly are ya thinkin' i'm gonna be doin'?" you, perhaps a little too aggressively, smack him on his annoyingly rock hard bicep. "normal sleeping, just normal sleeping! not--not whatever it is you're thinking right now." "'kay, then what's the problem?" you stare at him, exasperated. "because-- you know what? i'm just-- i'm gonna go shower." "alright. i'll be sure 't be ready fer ya." you think you might've choked on your spit a little. "shut up."

teasing you was just too goddamn fun, he thought. well, it was fun until you stepped out of the bathroom. your hair wet, dripping down your shoulders. and you were wearing those fuckin' shorts that lifted up a bit at the sides, leaving your legs and most of your thighs bare. to make it all worse, you were wearing a shirt much too big for you, and when you moved your arms down to your sides, the shirt covered your shorts completely. you looked like you were naked behind that shirt, and... fuck. fuck. you leaned down to grab something from your bag, and the size of your shirt made the collar hang much to low, exposing him to the fact that you were not wearing a bra. is it gettin' hotter in here? shit. this was a terrible idea. he swallowed as you walked back to the bathroom, completely unaware of his horrifyingly lustful thoughts. as soon as you walked from eyesight, he jumped from his spot in the bed, no longer feeling smug. rushing toward the desk, he slammed his palms down onto the wood. dammit. breathe, man. breathe, he huffed in and out. the mirror above the desk reflected his expression: face flushed, chest rising and falling raggedly, pupils black as night. why you of all people? the girl he's had it bad for since, what, first year of junior high school? he refused to be the kind of guy that uses this sort of situation to his advantage. more than anything, he was fighting off a boner that he feared was most certain to come to your attention the moment you both lay down. "what are you doing?" you interrupted.

osamu's head swiveled toward you. he honestly looked like he was in pain. did he hurt himself during the five seconds you spent brushing your hair? "'s nothin'." he replied, shaking his head. walking closer, you put a hand on his shoulder, realizing that while you were in the shower he'd put a shirt on. thankfully. "you look sick. are you okay?" "'m fine." he mumbled. your brows bent in concern. "you don't look fine." he looked deeply into your eyes, looking almost delirious. "don' worry 'bout it." his accent was becoming noticably thicker. you pouted, taking him by the hand. "come on, let's get you in bed." he sucked in a breath as you led him to large mattress, pushing him into a sitting position with your hands on his shoulders. he let out a strange, groaning noise when you pushed him further onto the plush cushion on the bleach-white sheets. "that's it, 'samu. just like that, now close your eyes." his breath shuddered when you placed your cold palm on his eyes, willing him to sleep away his apparent sickness. "'m not sick." you shushed him. "yes you are. look, you're sweating." you brushed his hair away from his forehead. suddenly, he grabbed your wrist, sitting up. his eyes met yours, blazing with a message you couldn't quite make out. "are ya tryin' to drive me crazy?" "what do you mean?" "i'm really tryin' 't hold back here." "hold back what?" he stared at you, no reply. then, he simply sighed, shook his head and laid down. his head turned away from you. you got the message. he was mad at you. you pressed your lips together. it was late anyway. you should just try to get some sleep and forget about the fact that the man you've loved for years is right next to you and he's upset.

after turning off the light, you slipped under the covers, sighing when at last your head hit the pillow. you both lay in silence for a moment before osamu spoke. "'m sorry." "you didn't do anything wrong. you're mad at me because i was too pushy. i get it." "nah. it's my bad. i just... ya kinda make me lose control sometimes." through the darkness you saw him run his fingers through his dark locks. you turned your body toward his, propping your head up with a hand. "when you say that -- you lose control -- what do you mean?" he breathed out a laugh. "i don't think ya wanna know, sweetheart." your heart jumped at the affectionate nickname. leaning closer to him, you whispered, "but what if i do wanna know?" you could see even at night that his eyes were screwed shut, like he was in agony. "yer gonna regret it. trust me." leaning closer, so close your faces were mere inches apart, you said softly, "but what if i don't?" his throat worked, looking at you lying above him, shrouded in darkness only illuminated by the moon that shown through the cracks of the drawn curtains. "then, i guess i'd just hope ya wouldn't hate me." you opened your mouth to reply but instead let out a quiet gasp as his palm made its way to your cheek, caressing it with his thumb. you closed your eyes, and realizing you were holding your breath, you sighed breathily. "i dont..." you said as his thumb trailed down you cheek to your jawline. "i don't think i could ever hate you." you were completely frozen. stuck in this moment of time. your faces so close if you moved just a little bit, your lips would meet. his thumb wandered from your jawline to your bottom lip. when he rubbed his thumb across your soft, inviting lips, he let out a gutteral moan. you fought the urge to rub your legs together. "i really shouldn't be doing this." he said suddenly. and yet he didn't draw his hand away. not that you would've let him. realizing your disadvantage, you lifted your fingers, tracing the muscles of his neck. it is only fair that i get to touch you, too. his breath grew more rapid at your touch, as you made your way from his neck to his torso. feeling a bit bolder, you at last replied: "maybe i want you to."

instantly, his hands grasped at your waist, lifting you onto him until your thighs hugged either side of him. from this position, you could not only see his eyes more clearly, but you could feel him. "do ya see what i mean? 's fuckin' insane, i know. 'm sorry." you turned your gaze away from him. if he was insane, then that made two of you. "i don't think this feels all too bad, though?" you said, leaning down and blantantly feeling your hands around his chest. you were keenly aware of what you were also rubbing against in the process. osamu hissed through his teeth. "don't say that." "mmm, why not?" you asked, fighting a smile. "'cause it's the exact kinda shit 'm sayin' is makin' me go crazy." your hands skirted from his chest to either side of his torso, squeezing. "but i kinda like it when you're like this." "'m tryna be a gentleman. yer not playin' fair." he said, grunting. you moved closer, your mouth just above the shell of his ear. "are you really the only one who's holding back?" swallowing, he pushed you back away from his face. surprised, you looked down in embarrassment, your courage leaving you. that is, until you felt the heated touch of his palms on your arms, and you were flipped onto the bed sheets. his body lay above you, his breath coming out in short pants. it was like you both came to the same conclusion simultaneously. and with it, came your signed agreement in the form of his lips crashing against yours. it was in no way a kiss of a gentleman. he leaned impossibly closer as he pressed his mouth further onto yours, deeper. he licked your lips, coaxing them open and tasting you, letting out a little "huh", like he'd discovered the answer to something that had long since piqued his curiosity. you didn't dare to speak; whenever your lips parted you could only gasp a breath before he pulled your face back to meet his lips. somewhere along the way his hands had trailed down to your hips, lifting you up until you were both in a sitting position, you in his lap. it was like you were a feast, and he was fucking starving. it wasn't enough. he wanted more. though, if you were being honest, you did, too.

you moved to straddle him, and with it sliding your hips against him with purpose. he gasped against your mouth, one hand squeezing your waist, the other lost in the mess of your hair. immediately he responded to your movements with a hand trailing down to grab at your ass, earning a gasp of your own. at last he pulled away (for longer than 2 seconds), a complete mess. eyes blown wide. lips swollen. hair tosled. "'ve wanted ya like this for so long. so fuckin' perfect. better than i pictured it." you threw your arms around his neck, resting your head against his chest. "I've wanted you too. like this. and, well, other stuff." he laughed. "betcha haven't had as many dreams." "maybe not, but i've imagined it plenty of times while awake." he let out a defeated huff. "why 'm i always losin' to ya." you played with the hairs at the nape of his neck, humming. "maybe cuz i'm just that good." "fuck yeah ya are." he said, resting his palm against your back and gently laying you back down onto the soft bed. "and 'm gonna prove it to ya." "oh?" his hands found the waistband of your shorts. meeting your eyes once again, you nodded in approval. that was all he needed to take you. touch you. show you just how good you make him feel. how lovely, how beautiful, how perfect you are.

you hissed at the sunlight that obviously didn't understand that the purpose of the curtains being drawn was to keep it out of view. an arm wrapped securely over your chest pushed you deeper against his body. you briefly thought of pretending to be asleep, just to embrace the peaceful morning for a little while longer...when you felt a hand begin to explore your body. you lifted your eyes, finding his expression dull as if still in a deep slumber. but his fingers were rubbing up and down your boob, so you were fairly certain he was completely awake. probably. though, maybe his body was moving out of muscle-memory at this point. you did spend all night getting fucked into next week. you moved to get up, but his arm chained up down, pushing you further against him with a frustrated groan. something very warm and very big and very hard was pushing against your ass. "'samu--" you started before he groaned again, louder. he rubbed his face into the crook of your neck. "not yet. just wanna feel ya a little bit longer." it's not like you could argue with him, right? "'mkay. just a little bit longer."

a/n: screaming crying throwing up i was like "oh i'll just write a little nice thing and it turned into this. bruh. also to me at least i think osamu gets reaaaally flirty with a girl he likes but is simultaneously trying sooo hard to be understanding and i love him so much

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k4marina · 1 year ago

Text

— ii. Dragon Rider || Heart of the Dragon

synopsis: a new routine in a new world

warnings: idek lol. unedited and not properly read (i kept falling asleep lmao)

series masterlist || next part

~ 2.5k word count.

game of thrones x modern!fem!reader

[gif found on pinterest]

Never in my life have I regretted anything more than I did now.

“Me and my big fucking mouth,” I grunted, getting up from the ground and dusting my leather pants. Gray Worm looks at me with a slightly amused expression. Of course he would, he just dropped me onto my ass for the fifth time today.

It had been almost two weeks after the Small Council meeting. There had been a few more since then, but no major topics were discussed, other than Varys begrudgingly backing what I had said about Cersie having scorpions when asked if his little birds had any news. The new armor and weapons for the Unsullied are also being made. After a few talks with Daenerys, Gray Worm, a few Unsullied commanders, and I, the new armor design was decided on. Surprisingly the Unsullied were very artistic people and had great ideas.

And, within the past two weeks, I’ve been tortured everyday, my limbs aching all the time, threatening to fall off. Everyday, I’ve been woken up at four in the morning for my sword lessons with Gray Worm for five hours a day. When I said I wanted to learn, I didn’t mean I wanted to train to be the world's best swordsman of all time.

“You’re enjoying this way too much,” I say towards him, wiping away the sweat on my face.

“I have no idea to what you are referring to, My Lady.” Gray Worm says, feigning innocence.

“You can’t call me ‘My Lady’ and then drop me on my ass for the fifth time.” I pointed out.

Gray Worm smiled and got into a fighting stance and I mirrored. “Your defense has gotten better; however, your strength and stamina is lacking.”

He gave the signal and charged towards me, going to swing towards my left. I sidestepped and blocked the hit with my sword before knocking it back. This time, I went for the attack, but Gray Worm expertly blocked me and knocked the sword out of my hand. The sword clattered against the stone ground, landing a few feet away from me.

“Maybe it’s best we stop for today.” He says, picking up the sword and placing it back onto the rack. I let out a sigh of relief and walked over to the inches, grabbing a towel and wiping the sweat away from my face and neck.

“Be honest,” I said, turning towards him. “Am I a lost cause?”

He snorts out a laugh and shakes his head. “Apologies, My Lady.” Once he’d composed himself he answered, “No, I do not believe you are a ‘lost cause’. It may seem difficult now, but it will get easier later on.”

“Wow, wise words,” I said sarcastically, taking a swig of water from the canteen. “They should call you ‘Gray Worm the Wise’.”

“I’m pleased that you think I am someone with wisdom.” He says, giving a small bow, making me chuckle.

After the lessons, I took a bath in my room, this time with the help of the servants. The first few days I would have them leave so I could bathe myself, but I guess over the days it just naturally happened. Once bathed and dressed in a white dress with gold embroidery and pearl beads before I made my way to the hall to have breakfast with Daenerys.

Not only was it a good way for us to get to know one another (mainly her learning about me) as well as discussing future events and how we would maneuver through it. However, not all of it. I had made the decision to not tell her about Jon Snow or the White Walkers, I think that’s something she should organically go through. All she knows about Jon is that he’s the King in the North is Jon Snow, Ned Stark's “bastard” and the former Nights Watch Lord Commander who came back from the dead.

The doors to the hall were swung open for me and I walked in, spotting Daenerys at the head of the table, looking through some documents. The sound of the doors closing, snapped her out of her thoughts. When she saw me she smiled, which I returned.

“What did I say about bringing work to the dining table,” I lightly scolded. She gave me a sheepish look and protested, “it can’t be helped, it's important work. As Queen I’m expected to do this and more.”

I walked over to her, carefully taking the documents and setting them off to the side. “Dany, you’ve been a Queen since you married Khal Drogo. You need to step back and take some time to just be Daenerys. Otherwise you’ll grow overworked.”

“Alright, alright. If you’re so sure.” She nodded towards the servants to begin serving the food. Like always, an array of food was laid out for us to eat. We both began to eat, making small talk and updating each other with any new updates.

“Gray Worm has been telling me that you’re quite exceptional with a sword,” She teased.

I playfully rolled my eyes, groaning, “not you too.” She let out a laugh, teasing me some more. “What? He says you’re a fast learner. He says he’s never seen someone land on their arse five times in a row.”

“Right, that’s it.” I huffed. “I’m running away.”

Daenerys laughed some more and I tried to hide my smile. Truthfully, she reminded me of my younger cousin in Volantis, Mera. Both of them had a heart of gold and an innocent child-like soul deep down.

“The servants told me that you refused to have your hair braided.” Daenerys points out. She’s not wrong. Instead of braiding my hair I opted to leave it in a ponytail or let it down.

“Well, I haven’t won any battles.” I said. “Each one of your braids represents a battle won, I haven’t won anything.”

“So if you win you’ll braid your hair?”

“Sure, why not. Why? Do you not want me to?”

“No, no. Actually, I would quite like that.” She smiled.

I eyed her suspiciously, “don’t tell me you’re planning on putting me in the frontlines.”

She shrugged. “Maybe. Your lessons with Gray Worm are going well. Who knows, by the time we’re ready for war you’ll be a master swordsman –or rather swordswoman.”

The rest of the breakfast went fine. Daenerys and I decided to take a stroll around the castle ground claiming she has something to show me. She dropped off the papers in her office before taking me through the back of the castle to the open fields in the back. The wind swept by us, carrying the saltiness of the ocean and the fresh scent of grass.

“Where are we going?” I asked as she led me deeper into the field.

“I just wanted to show you something. They’re right over there.”

We stood atop a hill and at the foot of the hill on the other side resting were Daenerys’ dragons. I felt my heart stop. No way. What the actual fuck. My mouth ran dry as I looked over the three dragons. Drogon, Rhaegal, and Viserion, all in their full glory. I looked over to Daenerys who was already looking towards me.

“You’re serious?” I ask. She smiles and nods. “What if they don’t like me and decide to eat me?”

Daenerys laughed, her cheeks turning pink. “They will do none of that sort, I swear. I have a strong feeling that they will like you.”

Carefully she led me closer to the three dragons. With every step they just grew more and more. They towered over the two of us and stood with immense power. And to think that these three are just a small fraction of the size of Balerion and the rest of the Targaryen fleet.

We stood a few feet away but I could still feel the heat that they emitted from their bodies. Their majestic eyes that were probably the size of my head watched me carefully. Shiny scales adorned their bodies that looked to be about the size of my hand or bigger. Their one claw nail was the same size as my limbs.

Holy fuck was this crazy. I’d read about these dragons and even saw a few drawings made by people who’d seen them in textbooks, but being this up close and personal with them was a whole other experience.

Oddly enough, for such dangerous creatures, they seemed to emit a sense of calm.

“You feel it too?” Daenerys eyes my reactions to the dragons. “Their calm.”

I nodded. “I thought my heart would be doing somersaults in my chest, but it’s not.” After the initial shock, I felt my body relax.

“They’re so beautiful.” I said to no one in particular.

We hung around them for some time, allowing me to get used to their presence while Daenerys told me stories about her and her dragons.

I looked over the dragons. Drogon, named after Daenerys’ husband Khal Drogo. Rhaegal, named after Rhaegar the Dragon Prince. Viserion, named after Viserys the Beggar King.

Daenerys followed my gaze to the cream and gold scales dragon that laid on the grass alongside his brothers. Viserion and Rhaegal seemed to play fight while Drogon watched.

“Despite their playful nature, those two are the oldest.”

“What?

The dragons carefully made their way over to where we stood. Drogon moved towards Daenerys, moving his tail around her as if giving her a hug. Rhaegal moved around behind us, opting to lounge. Viserion, however, moved closer to me. His green eyes bore into mine, as if it was trying to communicate with me.

He brought his face closer to me, like a dog wanting to be pet. I glanced back at Daenerys who nodded.

Viserion tilts his head when I carefully bring my hand up to stroke his gold and cream scales. A deep purr comes from him, nearly startling me. He nuzzles his head into my palm and purrs some more. It wasn’t like a cat's purr, more like a deep bass.

“Would you like to fly him?” Daenerys asks.

“Yes,” I replied without a thought, too entranced at the dragon in front of me.

She moves around Drogo, standing to the side of him.

“Stand like this,” she says. “This is what I find the easiest.”

I mimic her stance, standing besides Viserion. Drogon crouched down and Daenerys carefully stepped up, using his scales and spikes to seat herself atop the dragon.

I copied her, being careful to not hurt Viserion (not that I’d be able to) and sat myself on top of the gold dragon. It was uncomfortable, almost like riding a really large horse with spikes and scales. How Daenerys was able to ride her dragons without a saddle or harness was beyond me.

My hands gripped onto the spikes on Viserions back, holding on tightly as the gold dragon began to shift around from a crouched position to fully stand. My hands gripped onto him tighter as I tried not to fall off. I peaked over its massive body to see that Viserion was getting ready to take off.

“W-wait!” I looked towards Daenerys who was watching from atop Drogon. “Why is it taking off? What do I do?” Panic filled my voice.

There was no way in seven hells that she thinks that I can fly, right?

“Hold on!” She grins just as Drogon takes off into the sky. VIserion gets ready and I can already feel myself slipping off. He takes off just as I adjust my position, hunching down and tightening my grip onto his spikes.

Wind rushes past my ears and my hair flows all over the place. Instinctively, I closed my eyes while Viserion flew in the air. I could hear Daenerys call for me from across the sky.

“Open your eyes!” She says. “You’ll be safe, I promise.”

Carefully, I opened them. It was brighter up in the sky than on the ground and had a lot less clouds. I could hear the, surprisingly, gentle flaps of Viserions wings. I cautiously looked down, seeing that we were miles off the ground, so far up that we could see Dragonstone Island and I could feel my stomach start to buzz.

“Don’t look down,” I look up to see Daenerys. “When it was my first time I was terrified, as well, but you cannot let your fear control you or else it will transfer to your dragon.”

I nodded, taking in her words and sitting up straight with confidence. Despite still feeling uneasy I managed to get my grip on things (literally). Daenerys’ words rung in my ears.

“Your dragon,”

I’d read of Dragons bonding with non-Targaryens or non-Valyrians, case and point being Hugh Hammer riding Vermithor during the Dance of Dragons. But it would make sense if I could bond with Viserion in light of recent findings.

“Alright, let’s see what we can do.” I said to Viserion and I.

—

Daenerys and I spent the rest of the day riding our dragons. It was challenging, especially the part where you literally have to hold onto for dear life, but rewarding in the end.

In the end Viserion and I had truly bonded. He would know what I was thinking or how I was feeling without even saying a word to him. At first I thought it was just the two of us getting the hang of each other, but Daenerys explained that this was what she and Drogon felt. It was hard to believe that I was a Dragon Rider. But then again, this past week has shown that anything could be possible.

Getting off the Dragons was harder than getting on, my dress snagging on its scales, but not ripping entirely.

“I can help you with your riding,” Daenerys says as we walk back into the castle.

“I’d like that.” I replied. “I’m sure we can find books in the libraries that can help us too.”

“Have you uncovered anything else?” She asks, expectantly.

I shook my head. “Nothing of significance. I’ll keep reading and let you in on my findings.”

We split off so we could clean ourselves up and get ready for dinner. The bathtub was already ready for me when I entered the room. I pulled off my dress and sunk into the steaming hot water. The tension in my shoulders loosened and I dipped my head back to rest on the edge of the bathtub.

The weight of my necklace lay heavy on my chest, a firm reminder of my… predicament. I tried not to think about it all, otherwise I’d just spiral into some rabbit hole. Some days I wonder if it’s all some sort of dream. A long, vivid dream that I can't wake up from. A knot pulls at my chest, and my throat closes. My eyes flicker up to the ceiling, tears threatening to fall. I took a deep breath, the only thing I can do is take everything in day by day.

And then I fully submerged myself into the water.

a/n: finally, it’s here :) mb if there’s any spelling mistakes, i tried to proofread it but i kept falling asleep and couldn’t be asked anymore 😭 i’ll fix it later, trust 🙏.

comment to be on the taglist!

@wotcherpeak @music-luver25 @your-favorite-god @radiantdanvers @cluelessteam @daenerys713 @ministark @laanswife @idohknow @jromanoff

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gldexpnce · 3 months ago

Note

Honestly i really loved your writings and i would like to requests a yandere giorno scenario with a s/o who is a painter and acts quite cold and unbothered towards giorno once he kidnaps her. But one day she decides to ask him for some oil paint supplies to pass the time and ends up painting a portrait of giorno since he was the only good reference to paint. How would he react to the sudden gesture? (I think it would be quite a good scenario since valentines day just passed lmao)

a/n: hello my dear :3, thank you for the request!! i love the idea of giorno with a colder s/o, since she is harder to read he's more willing to cling to whatever is revealed of her interest!! i'm so sorry for the late update but i hope you enjoy this piece! i was literally listening to laufey songs when i was writing this.

tw: this will contain mentions of kidnapping and as always, yandere content ! goodies under the cut :3

image by アリナ on pixiv

GIORNO GIOVANNA

giorno expected you to put up a fight when he informed you that you would not be leaving his villa. when you didn't, it stunned him. that still didn't make the coldness of your gaze sting any less than a slap to his face.

despite the setback, he made sure you had everything you needed inside his home. he had a dedicated room where you had your paints and a beautiful view of the expansive gardens. it was there that you had your solace.

you'd spend hours in that room, away from him. you only really came out to eat, but you dedicated all of your time to art. he respected your skills, after all, that is how the both of you met.

he'd been a lover of the arts for quite some time, and when he heard of an aspiring artist hosting a gallery exhibit, he wanted to see it for himself. when he entered that gallery, he was enraptured with the way you painted. even as something as simple as a still life portrait, or paintings of outside scenery, you captured the life of it. most paintings he found, lacked the vibrancy of life, oh but you. dear you. you captured it all.

perhaps that is why he was struck by the idea of you. being able to capture life so accurately, you certainly must be full of the vibrancy you so easily painted.

again, he was surprised. you weren't what he imagined at all. that was the beauty of you. you never failed to surprise him.

he was able to coerce you into his villa with the promise of a stable place to live. it is hard for artists to make a living nowadays, so you'd be remiss to deny such a generous offer from a rich benefactor, even if you had doubts about his intentions

it had been several months since that fateful day and unexpectedly, you graced him with your presence, willingly. you stepped into his office and if he squinted, he could sense the trepidation in your words.

"signore giovanna, i'd like to request some oil paints", you briskly turned around and left.

this is new. even if he did want to gently remind you to call him giorno, he didn't have the heart to scold you, after all, this is a first!

you'd normally never make requests. if giorno noticed your paints, watercolor or medium otherwise, were running low, you'd find a new set unopened by morning. this is your first request and he is determined to only give you the best of oil paints. he even personally gave them to you, he had the wrapping themed for valentines day since you had asked for it a hairsbreadth away from the holiday. he's nothing if not a romantic.

in another unexpected surprise, you asked him to come with you to your art room. you asked him to sit down on the chaise below the window. he wonders what exactly you had planned. all his questions are answered though as you sit behind your easel and begin to paint. he waited for you patiently, holding his pose as you sketched him out and then painted.

he studied your collections intensively throughout your permanent stay. he never once saw a portrait of a person or a self-portrait for that matter. there's a small stutter of heartbeat when he realized that he is your first portrait.

"i'm finished", you get up and back up a step to look at your work. giorno got up as well, standing beside you.

there was that stuttering heartbeat. he feels the heat rush up his cheeks. you captured him beautifully. from the look in his eyes to the curls of his blonde hair, every detail is meticulous. he was almost taken aback by the beauty of it.

he didn't outright ask you, but you answered him anyway, "i wanted to paint you since you were the best subject for it"

out of the corner of his eye, he swore he could see the faintest smile on your lips and the beautifully fond look in your eyes.

this is a step, small to you but a leap for him. your walls are cracking chip by chip of his hammer and he is determined to see it crumble.

#yandere jjba #yandere giorno giovanna #yandere jojo's bizarre adventure #yandere part five #yandere #yandere x reader #ivy's wall #giorno giovanna #soft yandere #yandere x darling #giorno giovanna x reader #giorno x reader #yandere giorno #yandere golden wind

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that-sarcastic-writer · 1 year ago

Text

Heartless

Takeshi Kovacs X F!Reader

Summary: you get hurt, and all you want is for Takeshi to comfort you

Warnings: explicit sexual content, minors dni, unprotected sex, p in v, fingering, multiple orgasms, hair pulling, choking, praising, bit of soft!dom!Tak, creampie, explicit language, mentions of murder, blood, typical violence for this show

WC: 4.5k

A/N: please I know, lia you wrote something??? Ik, fucking wild. Its been like 6months lmao. But I was rewatching altered carbon and man I really missed tak. I might slowly dive back into my joel era but for now this is this. I dedicate this to @a-reader-and-a-writer. If this flops oh well, at least I was happy writing it.

You often regretted your life choices. Stupid decisions you made as a teenager that ultimately led you into a world of violence and death. It seemed never ending. Because no matter how many times you tried to go straight, use your skills and intelligence for something good, your reputation always preceded you, and you would end up in the same place; with a gun in your hand, covered in blood, and with another body to add to your conscience. Though, ninety percent of the time it wasn't your fault. Just like this time it was not your fault. Trouble just seemed to find you. Or you liked to find trouble, or maybe both.

“Ah Miss, what a pleasant surprise.” The AI that was this lovely hotel greeted you. “Oh. It appears that you are injured. Do you require medical assistance?”

You looked down at your blood stained clothes and hands, you felt the slightest throb on your shoulder from where a bullet had grazed you, and the stinging burn on your side from where a switchblade slashed at your skin. But to be completely honest you had grown numb to it. You simply shrugged.

“Nope. Just need a shower and some tequila.” You waved him off and you walked straight to the elevator, but before you entered, you turned around in your tracks to narrow your eyes at Poe. “Where is Takeshi?”

“Ah, Mr. Kovacs is not here at the moment. He left some hours ago to attend to some private matters he didn't disclose with me.” He answered plainly and you nodded.

“Shocker. Well if he comes, don't tell him I'm here? Cool? Great.” You were about to go up to the room you used whenever you and Takeshi were fighting, when Poe spoke again.

“Why is that? Wouldn't he like to know you are injured?”

“Oh fuck, no. Don't even tell him you saw me like this.”

Takeshi would go absolutely mad if someone spoke to you the wrong way. You still remember one time you joined him on one of his interrogations, for one reason or another. The man wouldn't keep his eyes off you, though you paid it no mind, you were used to men being nothing short of disgusting, or them calling you every sexual name in the book. But Takeshi? Man, pissed was nothing to describe the level of anger going through him. He didn't stop until the man was nothing but red. You, of course, while amused by his protectiveness of you, got him to stop.

“Tak, sweetheart, you need him conscious and breathing, don't you think?”

“He won't be doing much of either anymore.”

Takeshi was cute when he was angry, more so when he was overprotective of you. But even then, there were some lines you never wanted to cross. And if he ever saw you like this, the thought of someone hurting you like this would drive him mad. No stack would be left unharmed by him if he had any say in the matter.

So for the sake of the men you did leave alive, it would be best if Tak didn't see you like this.

“Well, why not?” Poe pushed, clearly he didn't understand the level of insanity Takeshi was capable of reaching.

“Because, if Tak sees me like this, he is not going to be very happy. He is going to actually cut somebody's head off—Again. Actually no, scratch that, he is going to decapitate and destack a lot of somebody's,” You said as slowly and as clearly as you possibly could, pausing to stare at the hologram as if to make a point. “So do not tell Takeshi I'm here, or that you saw me like this.”

So much for wanting to stay out of trouble for once.

~~~~~~

Man what a fucking shitshow. Truly, he didn't understand when the world had gotten so damn complicated. He didn't like to leave messes, he really didn't, but sometimes people would just force his hand, he had to get answers one way or another.

He should call you. Yes. He should do that. If there was one thing in this fucked up reality of his that he knew would never go wrong, it was seeing you.

“Mr. Kovacs,” Poe appeared at the bar, getting Takeshi's attention, but he didn't even bother to look. “I was not expecting to see you tonight. Were you able to attend to your matters?”

“Yeah.” Was all he responded to as he walked towards the elevator. His eyes were glued to the ground as a cigarette hung from his lips, he was tired and annoyed, frustrated and even more tired, but something caught his attention as he thought about his own self misery.

Blood.

“Why is there blood here?” He asked Poe with a slight shift from apathy to alarm as he traced the trails of blood droplets back the way he came.

“Oh… Yes.. That… Well you see.”

“Was someone here?” He asked with sharpness in his naturally baritone voice, looking around for anything out of place or broken, but everything looked normal.

“No. Well… Yes.. But..”

Takeshi’s head snapped to look at the AI, eyes narrowed as he stared intensely, waiting for an answer.

Oh. It better not be.

~~~~~~

Just get in the shower. You can do that, can't you?

Apparently you struggled more than you should have with that. It wasn't like you had a bullet in you, but then again, you also had gotten thrown through a table, and punched repeatedly, and stabbed, and shot—kind of. But man was the pain starting to infect every muscle, every joint, every crevice of your body. You weren't exactly sure how you got out of the shower. But you managed to wash the dried blood off you. Though you were still left with two open wounds that were most likely going to have to be cauterized.

You weren't going to enjoy this very much.

You were hoping to just throw yourself on the bed and get it over with before Takeshi decided to spontaneously show up. By then your wounds would have been closed, what were two new scars? It's not like Takeshi would notice two more among so many. Or maybe he would notice, but by then it would have been enough time for him to be angry about it but not actually do anything about it.

Pushing through the now throbbing pain shooting through your shoulder every time you moved your arm, you managed to get yourself into your underwear, but that was as far as that went.

You had made it halfway from the bathroom to your bed when you heard your name being called, rather loudly, by a voice you were all too familiar with.

Well fuck.

Takeshi followed the blood. There were drops on the elevator floor, stains on the buttons of the elevator. When the door opened, he followed the drops as his heart began to race. It wasn't a lot of blood, you weren't bleeding out, that was for sure, but his mind wouldn't stop racing. He called your name as he walked further into your room.

His jaw tightened at the sight of you, slightly hunched over, holding your side as you limped across the room. And the look you gave him was one of deer in headlights.

“Takeshi…” Your voice was hesitant, soft, wary as you leaned on one of the couches to support yourself.

He was in front of you in three, maybe four, long, heavy strides. His eyes were frantic, darting all over as he looked over your face. Your eye looked like it was going to bruise, your lip split and your jaw looked angry with a forming bruise.

“Who..” His words were barely audible, just barely above a rasp as he gripped your non bruised jaw tightly, forcing you to look at him.

“Tak…”

“Who the fuck did this to you?”

You should not be getting wet at the sound of his angry words, but the rasp laced in his tongue had you clenching your thighs together. Takeshi was hot when he was angry.

“It's fine, Tak. I'm fine, really.” You looked up to find his frantic eyes filled with fiery emotions, his jaw clenching and unclenching with each uneven breath he took. “You should see the other guy.”

Normally Takeshi found your dry humor amusing. But he couldn't get himself to even let out a chuckle, instead he huffed as he looked over your face.

“I want a name. Right now.” His words were barely audible, between huffs and puffs as he begrudgingly helped you sit down on the loveseat. You couldn't help but roll your eyes.

“Can't. Kinda shot him in the stack.” You answered flatly, huffing out a small breath as you threw your head back over the armrest. Takeshi narrowed his eyes at you, noting each bruise and mark on your torso, including the angry looking cut on your side.

“This wasn't just one person,” it wasn't a question, it was a fact, he knew that. He stared blankly at you as he waited for your response. The sigh you let out was confirmation enough. “What happened? And I want an answer without the attitude.”

You winced, a hiss of discomfort leaving your mouth as he ran the laser over the large gash on your side. You closed your eyes, counting to five in your head before you answered.

“I thought I was going in for a job. Something about needing access to some encrypted files,” You recalled what you had so innocently assumed to be just a simple hacking job, in and out with a decent pay, oh how mistaken you were. “The dude that had contacted me suddenly starts getting all up in my face, and asks me some weird questions about you. And when I told him to fuck off, his friends came out.”

You shot him a glare when he silently moved to your shoulder, but that one was less deep so it didn't hurt as much, it definitely didn't hurt as much as when the bullet actually touched your skin though.

“Why didn't you call me?” His eyes were sharp on you as he waited for your answer. Was he seriously angry at you?

“Oh right, and what was I supposed to say, ‘oh, hey sweetie, could you please come shoot some people I was doing illegal business with in the stack with me, pretty please?’” You raised your voice to a higher pitch, doing this valley girl accent which only made him inhale deeply.

“Do you ever answer anything without the bullshit?” He muttered with exasperation as he angrily lit up a cigarette and took a drag out of it.

“I handled it, Takeshi. Let it go.” You ultimately sighed, reaching over to brush your bruised knuckles over the side of his face.

His eyes found your face, he saw the forming bruises, and he remembered the blood. Somebody did this to you. Somebody hurt you and he wasn't there to stop it. You could have died. He could feel the anger settle in the pit of his stomach and he began to feel the urge to rip somebody's stack out with his bare hands. His fists clenched at his sides.

“Like hell.” He stood up so fast it gave you whiplash. You didn't want him to go. You needed him.

“Don't go,” You stood up so fast your side was definitely screaming at you but you didn't care. He wasn't looking at you, his eyes looked way past your head at the nearest wall. But you grabbed his face, forcing him to meet your eyes. “I need you.. Please? For once just stay with me.”

Please.

You didn't beg often. But when you did, there was not a thing in this world he could ever deny you. He found your eyes, big mistake. The second he saw those pleading eyes he was done for. He hated the ways in which you could so easily tug at the strings of his cold heart. For the longest time he thought he didn't have a heart, until he saw you for the first time and that thing started beating.

His mouth was on yours, he kissed you long and hard. He grabbed your face as he slipped his tongue inside your mouth. He held you, pulling your body against his. Your fist bunched around his shirt, gripping it like vice as he kissed you with fervor, like this was the last thing he ever wanted to do in this world.

“You wanna take care of me? Hm?” You spoke softly against his lips, your fingers now threading through his long golden strands.

The grunt that rumbled in his throat was almost animalistic. He wanted you on that bed and he never wanted you to leave it.

“You're in pain..” He muttered through deep breaths as his long fingers gripped your jaw, forcing your head back as he brushed his nose against yours, holding on to the little stability he had left. “Don't wanna hurt you.”

“I like it when you hurt me. I want it.” Your words were soft and desperate, quiet as you brushed your lips over his. Pain was the last thing on your mind when you had him this close, when you felt his touch, when you knew he was hanging in by a thread. You needed this more than you needed air in your lungs.

“You want it?” He repeated, voice as low as it could go, eyes closed as he waited for that confirmation, for your permission, to absolutely ruin you.

“Yes. Please Takeshi, I need it.”

There wasn't anything better than Takeshi's cock in your guts after a brush with death.

His large calloused hands found the back of your bare thighs, he so easily hoisted you up around his waist as his lips crashed against yours without another word being said. He was a man of little words afterall. He was a man of action. And he was goddamn sure he would give you exactly what you needed.

Your back landed on the soft duvets, but his lips never parted from yours. Your frantic hands shoved his coat off his shoulders, then the buttons of his shirt as he fumbled with his pants. It took some time, between desperate grabs and frantic hands, he was just as naked as you, only your underwear left between the two of you.

His lips found your neck, wet kisses all over the skin as his hands roamed your body. He pulled back enough for his eyes to look you over. He would never get tired of looking at you.

“You're so…” He didn't have to say it, the look in those hazel eyes of his said every word he wasn't capable of saying out loud.

You gave him a smile, your eyes big with both longing and endearment. He kissed you one more time before he tugged your panties down. He settled just beside you, thick thighs caging one of yours as his long fingers brushed over your clit, leaving you to gasp against his mouth. His lips curved up slightly as his fingers moved in slow, long circles. He could feel you get wetter and wetter the longer he kept up his torture. He liked to hear you whine and beg for it.

“Tak..” His name fell from your lips when you no longer could keep your mouth closed, you were gripping at his shoulder as you helplessly grinded against his fingers, desperate for more.

“Mhm?” His lips were on your ear, his warm breath ghosting over the side of your face with each sharp inhale he took. “Need me to fuck you with my fingers, then with my cock? Is that it?”

You were nodding so hard, gasping softly when he circled his fingers around your wet hole, teasing you.

“Mhm!—Please—” You didn't even get the chance to finish your sentence when two long fingers buried themselves deep into your cunt.

Your lips fell open as your eyes unconsciously rolled back into your head, the delicious feeling of his thick fingers filling you. It wasn't long before Takeshi was all but fucking you with his fingers, and you were nothing but sobs of pleasure. He buried his fingers to the knuckle, brushing your most sensitive spot with each snap of your wrist.

Fuck did you look pretty like this. But you looked prettier when you were drunk on his cock.

His free hand gripped your hair, keeping your head in place so he could watch the way your face would contort with pleasure. The lewd sound of your wet cunt being filled by his fingers wasn't lost on him either. He loved it. He was addicted to it.

“That's it, let it go, sweetheart.” He grunted through his teeth when he realized you were so close, the way your hips were so desperately following the movements of his hand and the grip you had on his wrist was all but telling. He gave you a long satisfied hum when he felt your release coat his hand with a sob of his name.

His fingers only left you when you were digging your nails into his wrist. His lips curled up in amusement at your desperate attempts but he ultimately complied. His lips were on your forehead as he eased you back into steady breathing.

“You okay?” He was quiet, but you heard it. You simply nodded in response, still not fully able to find your voice. Good enough. “Good, ‘cause I'm gonna give you exactly what you deserve now.”

He grabbed your arms and flipped you on your stomach with ease. You were taken aback, instinctively pushing yourself up on your forearms, but a hand on your back forced you back down.

“Easy. Just relax, sweetheart,” he shushed you softly, you felt him move around for a second until you felt him behind you, right in between your open thighs. “Lemme take care of you, hm?”

Your response was in the form of a soft hum, you lied flat on your stomach, your head to the side so you could breathe and your ass up enough for him to do as he pleased. And you waited, rather impatiently. You could feel Takeshi's hands on your hips, then up your back, until one of them settled on your shoulder blades.

You were about to open your mouth when you felt the head of his cock brush over your wet clit. The only sound leaving your throat was that of a choked out moan.

“You want it?” His lips were on your ear, voice smooth, but with this baritone rasp, a combination that drove you insane. You were nodding into the blankets.

“Yes, Takeshi. Please.”

Fuck, he was rolling his eyes at the sound of his name leaving your lips like that. He didn't need to say anything else. He pushed himself into you with a long, hard thrust that had you gasping.

“Ahh….” You squeezed your eyes shut, hands squeezing the sheets in front of you at the feeling of his cock stretching your walls. You have been with Takeshi for some time now, but you never truly got used to the size of him (with this sleeve at least). “Fuck— you're so..”

He eased a hand up and down your back, shushing you softly, he was used to it by now. When he felt you start to back into his cock he knew you were fine. He dug his fingers into your shoulder, holding you down on the mattress as he snapped his hips. A gasped cry left your lips. Again, and again with each brush of his cock, until he had you sobbing into the mattress.

Takeshi, he fucked hard, and he liked it rough, but he had learned to take his time, he learned to take it slow, drag out the feeling for as long as possible, until you were nothing but a sobbing mess. His hand was wrapped around your hair, pushing your head down as he leaned over you. His chest was flush against your back as he rutted his hips against your ass, his lips on the back of your neck, leaving open mouthed kisses everywhere he could.

Takeshi wasn't very talkative, ever, but goddamn was he noisy. His heavy pants, ragged grunts, the occasional fuck, were all in your ear which each delicious drag of his cock.

“Goddamn,” he breathed out, nipping at your jaw as he pulled your head up enough to look at your fucked out face, “you feel so fucking good.”

“Mhmmm. Shit, Tak. Feels so—” You couldn't even finish a cohesive sentence you were so cock drunk, so high on the feeling of his cock brushing that one spot that had you rolling your eyes. You reached behind you, trying to grab him, any of him.

“Feels good, doesn't it baby?” You could hear the slight smirk on his lips as he wrapped his arm over your neck from shoulder to shoulder, almost as if he was putting you in a headlock.

“Yes! Fuck yes—”

“Of course it does.”

That was enough of taking it slow for one night.

Takeshi held you in place with his arm over your neck as he drilled into you. The only sounds leaving your mouth were sobs and choked out pants. You couldn't say any words at that point. He was fucking you so hard into that mattress you didn't even realize when the burn in your stomach started to build. All you knew it was that you were digging your nails into his arms so hard the marks would be there for days. It felt good to be caged under his body, with nowhere to go. Not that you wanted to be anywhere else.

“C'mon, let me take care of you. I'm right here.” He rasped out, hanging on by a thread himself. God, it felt so fucking good. You were barely hanging on. But the second his thumb found your swollen clit you were done for. You couldn't even make a sound, you fell into a silent cry, eyes rolled into the back of your head as your release washed over you. “That's it. I got you.”

He could feel your release coat his cock, and the feeling of you coming all over him only made him go over the edge himself. He gave you two, maybe three more long, hard drags of his cock before he was spilling himself inside you with a breathy fuck leaving his lips in the process.

You all but collapsed, your head falling on the pillows as you panted, Takeshi did the same. He dropped his face on your neck, eyes closed as he steadied his breath. He stayed there for some time, he couldn't hold himself up forever, but fuck this felt so nice. You underneath him, wrapped under his arms, nobody could hurt you here. His lips eventually found the side of your head for a chaste kiss before he moved to lay beside you. But the distance between you lasted a whole five seconds because he was pulling you to him. He positioned you to face him, one leg thrown over his torso as both of his arms caged you in. He would keep you here if he could.

Silence ultimately drowned out your soft breaths, but not once did he stop looking at you. And you could tell something eating at him, weighing on his chest. You brought a hand to his face and you saw him close his eyes with a sigh.

“I'm sorry I wasn't there.” He finally said, riddled with guilt and anger all over again. You frowned softly and shook your head at him.

“Stop that, okay? It wasn't your fault.” You answered, smoothing out the soft frown above his eyebrows. He looked at you, watching as you brushed the loose strands of hair out of his eyes but he said nothing. “I'm a big girl, Takeshi. What I do or what messes I get myself into are not your fault. So stop. If I was mad at you I wouldn't let you rearrange my guts, would I?”

Takeshi didn't laugh often. Or ever really. But sometimes your absurdity brought on a genuine chuckle out of him.

“Aw, so he has a sense of humor. He's not a robot!” You snorted, raising your voice like you were announcing it to the entire city. He rolled his eyes at you.

“I don't fuck like a robot, do I?” There was a tiny shit eating grin on his face which made you shove his shoulder playfully.

“Oh my God, shut the fuck up.” You kissed him with a soft laugh.

~~~~~~~

Goddammit Takeshi Kovacs.

This man just simply couldn't wake up and stay in bed with you for one day. Just one fucking time, you asked.

You groaned tiredly as you stretched out your sore muscles before sitting up. No tall angry looking envoy anywhere. How tragic. You were about to get out of bed when the door swung open. You were about to reach for your gun on the nightstand when you saw it was just Takeshi, and he looked rather amused.

“You're awake.” He raised his eyebrows at you in surprise, expecting you to be passed out after the night you had, partly his doing. You looked at him with suspicion as he walked to the bed. “I have something for you.”

“Is it a decapitated head?” You blinked at him, feigning innocence and he chuckled.

“No. Well I didn't bring it here anyway.” He shrugged as he handed you a red and blue switchblade. It looked kind of cool. You stared at it for a good few seconds before you looked up at him with confusion.

“What's this?”

“The owner of this.” He pointed at the brand new scar on your side. Your eyes widened with realization and your mouth fell open.

“Takeshi—”

“I don't want to hear you.” He cut you off before you could even yell at him for not letting it go. You frowned at him deeply. He sighed as he sat beside you. “They had it coming. They touched you. It's that simple.”

You stared at him, and you wanted to force yourself to be angry at him, angry at him for not letting it go, angry at him for treating you like some damsel in distress who needed him to save her. But when you looked into his eyes you didn't see the hero's complex. Not at all. You saw a man who was looking at the only thing that mattered to him in this world. And he'd be damned if he ever let anyone take that away from him again.

“Awe, baby, so you aren't so heartless after all.” Your smile was mocking on the outside, but deep down it was one of endearment.

“Fuck you.”

You loved him. And even someone as heartless as him was capable of love, too.

#takeshi kovacs x reader #takeshi kovacs smut #takeshi kovacs x fem reader #takeshi kovacs x f!reader #takeshi kovacs #altered carbon #joel kinnaman

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begrudging-fudanshi · 6 months ago

Note

So i stared reading windbreaker after i saw your post about it , it's wholesome manga with amazing fights

in your opinion Why didn't nii satoru reveal Sakura's past until now ? Why was Sakura alone ?

Hell yeah. Welcome to the fandom. I'm glad my propaganda has been working.

To be honest, I've been thinking about this series way too much over the last couple weeks, so this is probably going to be A Lot. I am dumping a lot of accumulated thoughts in here and simultaneously trying to keep a bunch of other thoughts from cluttering it up. If any of this feels disjointed, it's because I've been trying (I swear) to not make this like 10,000 words long lmao.

(CW: Wind Breaker manga spoilers + discussion of child neglect, trauma, feelings of worthlessness, parental loss, grief, and a suicide attempt in the context of the series. Hope you're ready for some pain.)

I'm going to answer your questions in reverse order, because I think they're actually very closely connected.

Sadly, my read on Sakura's past is really dark. Based on what we know so far, there's a lot to suggest that Sakura has been badly neglected for a long time, both physically and emotionally. Based on his lifestyle and the way he talks about himself, I really struggle to believe that he's received any genuine affection or care in many years, if ever. (I'm so glad he was able to go to Furin.)

The flashbacks at the start of episode 1 of the anime suggest he was taken in by relatives who didn't want him, and I think they basically set him up for failure in every way. They seem to have done the bare minimum required of them by the law, like sending him to school, but I can see no evidence that they did much of anything else. Like, what kind of asshole sends a 15-year-old kid to live alone in a barren apartment with literally nothing to wear except his school uniform? Caring people wouldn't let a kid live like that. (That said, I have a bad feeling that his lifestyle seen in chapter 56 is an upgrade compared to what he had before.)

Given this, it's clear Sakura really means it when he says he's always done things by himself. I think this is why he looks so torn up when his friends show him real kindness and why he's so sensitive to anyone showing affection. I also think this means that he really wants to forget his past. This is a big part of why we haven't seen it revealed yet: Sakura isn't ready to revisit it, himself.

---

Something interesting about Wind Breaker's backstories is that they all (as far as I and my notes can remember) follow a consistent pattern. They're not just lore dumps that tell us about the character's past. They actually follow each character through a process of changing their beliefs about themselves, often based on their view of the past. This is why they're all in the first person. Some of these changes happen in the present while others are part of flashbacks, but either way the process is basically the same.

In each backstory, the character starts out believing something about themselves that gives rise to a contradiction that keeps them trapped. This belief somehow keeps them from living their best life and, often, stops them from changing their ways to make their best life possible. However, someone else helps them challenge that belief, giving rise to a revelation that lets them change how they see themselves. This change enables them to see new possibilities and lets them move forward towards the life they want.

For example:

Umemiya believed his parents would blame him for their deaths, so he couldn't let himself grieve them nor believe that he deserved to live. His guilt blocked out his memory of the event, keeping him from remembering what really happened. However, a nameless(?) Furin student and Shitara helped him realize that his parents saved him and were happy to see him survive. Thus, he was able to grieve and imagine a future for himself other than his self-destruction.

Kaji believed that his rage was uncontrollable and couldn't even see himself as human. Hiragi helped him realize that he could manage his triggers and change his behavior to be able to find acceptance and live his life.

Tsubaki believed that she couldn't like pretty things or express herself how she wanted. Ito and Yui helped her learn to dress up and present herself the way she liked, allowing her to accept herself and transition. (I know she's not canonically transgender but that's still the best way I can see to describe it.)

After Yui's death, Ito believed that she might never have truly loved him. Tsubaki, Sakura, Suo, and Nirei help him realize the secret meaning of the tree that she planted in his garden, letting him live his life without worrying if she was truly happy.

What's important here is that the character must be ready to have their beliefs about themselves challenged so they can understand their full truth. Otherwise, their story of their past would be incomplete. (Consider what Umemiya's backstory would have sounded like if he still believed he was a murderer.) In fact, we already have an example of this that I'll get to, next.

Because Sakura isn't yet in a position to challenge the beliefs holding him back, he can't reveal his past, either. He has friends helping him, but it's going to be a while before they've truly shaken his most unhelpful beliefs.

---

That said, this process has actually played out with Sakura once before and I think it tells us a lot. It shows us exactly why he's not ready to reveal his past.

In chapter 1, Sakura starts out believing that he's meant to always be alone, leading him to initially reject the people of Makochi. Then, Kotoha helps him acknowledge that he does want to be accepted and convinces him to give it a shot. However, while this is great progress and very necessary for Sakura's growth, this isn't a complete resolution. He still has an even more deep-seated belief that has to be addressed.

In addition to asserting that he's meant to be alone, Sakura also lays out another belief in chapter 1 that I argue really gets to the root of his deepest trauma. He doesn't quite say it explicitly, but it underpins both his belief that he's meant to be alone and that he's worth nothing but his fists.

The closest he comes to naming it is when he describes Furin. He says it's "The lowest of the low, hated by all others, worth nothing but their fists … It's a battle to determine the trashiest of the trash. That suits me perfectly."

I have to admit, the first few times I heard and read this, I completely missed how fucked up it is for a 15-year-old kid to say this about himself. I think I've gotten so used to taking shonen protagonists' confident declarations at face value that I just didn't question it, in the same way I've learned not to question, say, 12-year-old Gon deciding to become a pro hunter and travel the world fighting adults. The way it's presented very deliberately (and, I think, cleverly) blunts the impact as well, making use of shonen stylistic conventions to disguise it as stereotypical shonen protagonist bluster. This mirrors how Sakura masks his deeper feelings about himself.

However, as I read through the rest of the manga, it became clear that this is what Sakura actually, deeply believes. He's 15 years old and he truly sees himself as trash—in other words, worthless. The only way he can imagine finding worth in himself is through his strength. Even then, this is only for Sakura himself. He can't let himself imagine anyone else ever valuing him for any reason, so he must find self-worth all on his own. To put it more sharply, he can't imagine deserving unconditional love. Based on what little we do know about his past, this belief stems from a lifetime of emotional neglect.

The thing is, Sakura's belief that he's worthless is actually, paradoxically, a coping mechanism. As horrible as it is, it helps him rationalize his life in a way that lets him keep living despite his neglect and isolation. If he's truly worthless, then he's never had a reason to expect being loved or accepted by anyone—he's always been meant to be alone. This is how he can tell himself that he doesn't care and has given up. This lets him bury the pain of his isolation and pretend it doesn't truly hurt. By believing that he has always been worthless and unable to be (to deserve being) loved, he has had no reason to get his hopes up for the future, nor any reason to question why he's been treated so badly in the past. He can accept it (has to accept it), even if he hates it, because it was always inevitable.

Notice how Sakura reminds himself that he's given up right before punching the Spaltips' leader in chapter 1. This is the story he tells himself to contain the hurt. He does something similar in chapter 56, reminding himself that he's supposed to be alone as he grapples with his friends' kindness. He bludgeons himself with this reminder as a way to push away thoughts about his past. He then shifts his focus to thinking about his growing care for his friends rather than his feelings about himself. Once again, Sakura makes himself turn away.

The trouble is, this belief is his only means of holding back an unfathomable amount of pain inside of him. It's the only way he knows how to live with all the myriad ways he's been treated like shit. To doubt his own worthlessness, therefore, is to expose himself to overwhelming grief. Because, if he isn't worthless, he then has to ask himself why he had to suffer for so long. That kind of question is too awful for him—for pretty much anyone—to face on their own. This coping mechanism protects him, but it also traps him and prevents him from finding relief.

This comes to a head in chapter 1, as the townspeople surround him and the old woman tries to tend to his wound. As she reaches towards him, he screams at her to stay away. This act of genuine kindness fills him with terror. It's not just that he fears eventual rejection—Sakura fears the idea he could be accepted at all. Remember, he's just "failed" to win the fight and, worse, ended up having to be protected because he got hurt. Sakura could accept Kotoha's kindness earlier because he "earned" it by stopping her attackers, but now there's someone trying to help him for what feels like no reason. For Sakura, who must believe that he was never meant to be loved or accepted, being shown kindness for no apparent reason feels like an existential threat. It threatens to undermine the walls that he's built inside of him to keep going. This is why he allows Kotoha to help him instead—he can still rationalize her help as transactional.

This rationalization provides his means of escape. To accept his place in Makochi, he only has to accept that he doesn't have to be alone. He doesn't have to believe that he can be valued or loved unconditionally, nor that he deserved anything better. Instead, Sakura finds a way to "earn" his acceptance: The chapter culminates with Sakura accepting Bofurin, which he shows by leaping over all the others to kick the Spaltips' leader in the face.

By showing his strength, by upstaging the heroes and claiming his place among them, Sakura proves (to himself) that he is strong enough to be accepted. Rather than accept that he could always have been valued and accepted unconditionally—that he always could have been loved—Sakura would rather believe he's earned his acceptance based on his strength.

In this way, Sakura can continue to believe in his own worthlessness, saving himself from having to face his past. Because of this, even as he's learned that he can be accepted, he still maintained his belief that he was meant to be alone from the start (again, see chapter 56). This lets him continue to justify his past suffering and minimize his own pain.

This comes back around in chapter 162, when Sakura's classmates talk about his low self-esteem. Despite their efforts to show him that he's loved and valued, Sakura ultimately still believes he's only worth his strength. We see how he rejects Umemiya's praise, unable to understand how he could be praised when he "failed". Sakura can't believe he could be valued when he couldn't even single-handedly save the town.

But, as long as he believes this, his past will remain a mystery, not just to his friends and to us as readers, but even to Sakura himself. Just as Umemiya's repression kept him from realizing that his parents loved him, Sakura's repression keeps him from realizing that he has always deserved to be loved. He cannot acknowledge, can't even recognize, the pain he's endured in his life, because he still has to believe it didn't matter. Because of this, he can't let himself grieve or admit that he has always deserved better. He's still trapped believing he must always prove his worth through his strength alone.

Of course, changing this isn't going to be easy. He will get there. His friends will help him through it. Still, it's going to be rough. I think it'll be a while yet before he's ready to tell us about his past.

---

Addendum

All of that being said, something I really love about Wind Breaker is how hopeful it is and the way it shows Sakura living despite his past. To that end, I want to note one last thing: Sakura can still smile, despite everything else. No matter what he tells himself, he still feels hope.

I mentioned above that I didn't recognize Sakura's low self-esteem at first because it's masked with stereotypical shonen protagonist confidence. I think this is very deliberate by the author. We're supposed to see Sakura as cool, confident, and badass in the beginning, only to realize that he's also hurting inside. (Emphasis: that's also, not instead. These aren't mutually exclusive.) Sakura's cocky grin is part of a mask he wears, but it's not a lie.

While I believe Sakura has suffered a lot, it's important to emphasize that he's not broken or doomed to drown in grief. What I've laid out here is what I believe is going on beneath the surface, and I do believe he's going to have to face his trauma eventually, but let's not forget that our boy can still smile after all of that. The fact that he can smile doesn't mean that he's not hurting, but the fact that he's hurting doesn't mean he only feels pain. Let's not do him dirty by miring our view of him in grief. Instead, as we acknowledge how much he's suffered, let's also be happy at just how far he's come and hopeful for how far he'll go in the future.

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n0odlz · 2 months ago

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NCC x ETC Headcanons

(No, these are not romantic (눈‸눈)

✦Family Ties

Bill & Aaron

• Do NOT let these 2 near each other. It's only gonna cause trouble for everyone. Christmas dinners? Tuh, as if! Thanksgiving? Forget about it. Heck, even a family trip to the water park! Just go ahead and check that off the list right now..

• Bill and Aaron are cousins, which was only found out after Bill and Aaron got into some huge fight about comics and how underpaid the artists are. Somehow, Mrs. Dickey got ahold of this information and immediately told Bill they were related.

"William, that is your cousin! You two should not be fighting."

"Mom, WHAT? I-... I-.. YOU- YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS! "

"Enough, William. I don't have time for your bullshit, especially since we'll be having a family get together this Friday. Don't want your aunts thinking I'm a failure of a mother, do ya?"

• Aaron is obviously older. And you'd think any time something goes wrong, the adults would blame it on him since he knows better. Nope! It's always Bill since Aaron could do no wrong 😇!!1! 11

• The only reason they could ever like or admire each other is because they both lead clubs. Aaron is the whole reason Bill even started the Eltingville Club and any time Aaron brings up the fact that he was totally inspired by his older cousin, Bill denies it with his whole heart.

Jerry & James

• They're brothers! How cute! Well.. No! Maybe when they were kids- actually, no. They've been arguing pretty much their whole life. Probably worse than Bill and Aaron. They're cousins, so they don't even see each other that much. Jerry and James is a WHOLE other story.

• Every fight starts because James is "Older and stronger" and there's nothing Jerry can do about it. James being such an asshole is what made Jerry into one too, no matter how much their parents tried to intervene, nothing would work.

• "Extract the problem" is what Jerry's therapist would say, but how can you extract the problem when you're literally forced to live with it till you're 18? Guess you'll just have to tough it out then, huh?

• (Based on what Mr. Dorkin said) Jerry would've probably turned out fine with a brother. He wouldn't have needed to hang out with the club as much (or at all). But that would only be if he had a little brother. See, little siblings would be easier to handle, especially since they're still growing. They're small and easy to train like a puppy, they've got no real interests or personality so it'd be up to the older sibling to influence them in the way they want! Now older siblings? Don't even think about it. "Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks?" Well unfortunately, James isn't a dog. And he can't be taught new tricks either.

• If you're wondering why these two have different last names, don't worry, their mom is not a cheater 😸!! Their mom and dad couldn't decide who's last name to give the kids so they decided to give Jerry his mother's maiden name and James their dad's last name

• James obviously makes the million year old "ur adopted lmao" joke on Jerry just because he doesn't have the same last name as everyone else in their family. At some point when they were younger, James SOMEHOW convinced Jerry he was genuinely adopted. I mean.. How the hell do you even pull that off? THEY LOOK IDENTICAL!! DOWN TO THAT FUCK ASS BOB 💔

─────────ೋღღೋ─────────

This is HEAVILY inspired by what anon said in this post (anon, if you come across this post YOU'RE VERY INSPIRATIONAL)

(Also where I got the Jerry sibling thing from)

#eltingville club #the eltingville club #jerry stokes #bill dickey #evan dorkin #the northwest comix collective #ncc #ec #hcs #i hate bill dickey #james prolongo #aaron winkleman #idk what else to tag #n0odlz

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worldstarz · 10 months ago

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saving kaeya after his fight with diluc

•❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅•

pairing: kaeya alberich x fem!knight!reader

summary: after his fight with diluc, kaeya is thrown out of the manor to fend for himself. stumbling, bleeding, and on the verge of death, he finds you.

tags: hurt + comfort ; some angst ; mutual (?) feelings ; tbh could also be seen as platonic ; pre-storyline ; not proofread ; prolly ooc i’m so sorry

cw: blood ; injuries ; mentions of violence

notes: going through my notes app that is filled to the BRIM with oc x canon pairings. i haven’t played genshin in over a year (and this blurb was originally written like two years ago lmao) but i still love my flirty slutty cryo man! anyways i altered it so it’s reader x kaeya and removed some oc stuff, but idk how to fit in an explanation on why you’re in the forest… let your imagination run wild!!!

•❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅•

kaeya stumbled out of the winery, hand trembling over his bleeding eye.

'it's fine... everything will be fine.' thoughts raced through his head. his whole entire body was throbbing in pain. it’s not like he could go back inside the winery to rest—not after a fight as nasty as that.

"diluc will be running over to some maid any second now. ha, lucky bastard," kaeya muttered.

diluc had a team of servants that he could go to. kaeya only had diluc, emphasis on had.

at the dead of night, there was no way he could get care at the cathedral. he couldn't hold in a chuckle, realizing the situation he was in. he had no one, huh? though popular, kaeya didn’t have any particularly close friends who he could spend the night with.

with that, he knew he had no choice but to pitifully limp to the favonius headquarters—a long, long walk away.

he barely made it into the forest before he fell to the ground, wheezing against a tree. his ears were ringing, but he could hear footsteps cautiously approaching him. he didn't even have the energy to lift his head.

"kaeya? what the hell are you doing out here this late?" whose voice was that...? was it an angel’s? oh, wait. angels wouldn’t swear. it was your voice.

in the state he was in, he could only muster a grunt in response. you kneeled down in front of him, and gasped at the sight of his collapsed body. "just what have you gotten yourself into this time?" you muttered. "can't stand up anymore, huh?"

you tilted his chin up, and both of you wince—him as a result of pain, you due to getting a clear view of his injuries. his blue hair, usually tied into a low ponytail, cascaded down his shoulders, caked in blood. his crimson-soaked chest rose and fell rapidly. "ooh, that is nasty. come on, lean on me. we're going to headquarters." you kneeled down to wrap your arm around his torso, gingerly lifting him up.

"well, would you look at that. that’s exactly where i was heading,” he chuckled, leaning against your body. typically, he would never accept support from another. but, with this arguably being the lowest point of his life, his pride was the least of his concerns. plus, you were just so undeniably warm. if he’s on the verge of death, then maybe being by your side wouldn’t be so bad for a final memory.

you don’t respond, your pace slower from his weight and for his comfort. silence follows. you obviously had a million questions for him—what the hell happened? did he get in a fight with an abyss mage? why was he out so late?—but you could tell he was beyond exhausted, and from the sight of his gushing wounds, getting answers was far from a priority.

the two of you arrived in the city, streets barren in the pitch black of night. the tavern was closed, so, thankfully, no drunkards were hanging about near the path.

the inside of the headquarters was equally empty. the soft glow of lanterns lit the way up the stairs to the barracks. "kaeya, where is your room?" you asked, your voiced barely above a whisper as to not wake the other knights.

"all the way at the end of the hall. but... i forgot my keys," he whispered. you could tell he was smirking.

"how sly of you. if i didn't know any better, i would've thought this was another trick of yours to be close to a lady," you responded, though there wasn’t a hint of accusation in your voice.

"ha, you know me so well."

"to my room we go." you walked further up the steps.

after a moment of silence, you mumbled, "i know you're not the type of person to sneak into a lady's room."

"i'm grateful you understand me so well."

"zip it. i don't even know your favorite color."

unlocking your door, you gently set kaeya down on your bed. you immediately get to work, removing his coat and shoes. usually, his slick tongue would say something suggestive, but tonight, he had no choice but to refrain.

even with your limited knowledge of first aid, you knew just a damp rag would do nothing to help. "i have no tools with me," you say, beginning to walk away. "i'll go grab so-"

kaeya suddenly grabbed your arm, effectively stopping both you and your sentence. he looked so... pained. "please don't go,” he whispered. you never could have expected this level of venerability from him.

"...kaeya?" you whispered, turning to face him. "i have to find a way to tend to your injuries. you're in pain, aren't you?"

his hand slacked.

after coming back with medical supplies, the two of you were silent as you tended to his wounds. he gazed at the ceiling, the silence occasionally broken by you asking for permission for actions such as unbuttoning his shirt. you don’t comment on the new cryo vision in his pocket.

deep gashes littered his body, most notably a diagonal one across his chest. as you applied pressure against the gaping wound in an effort to stanch the bleeding, kaeya couldn’t help but hiss in pain. “sorry, sorry, i’m trying to be gentle,” you whispered hurried apologies, using one hand to continue applying pressure and the other to hold his hand.

his grip tightened, and the poor boy whispered, “i know, i trust you. or, well, i’m trying to.”

all you could do regarding his eye was wrap it in bandages to get it checked out in the morning. the basic first aid lessons you were required to take to become a knight did not cover an injury like that.

once you finished, you sat on the floor, leaning against the bed frame. he was still holding onto your hand.

"what happened?" you asked softly.

"..."

"was it an ambush?"

"..."

"i'll report it in the mor-"

"don't. please, don't," he whispered. “i swear i’ll explain everything to you one day.”

you grimaced. "fine. just... promise not to do anything stupid like that again, alright? i was worried."

kaeya didn't respond, going over your words in his head. you were worried? you didn't seem worried. but... you were worried. why would you so willingly take care of him like this? how would you react if you knew who he really was? would you still be worried?

he couldn't hold back his tears and restrained sobs. you lifted your head in surprise, leaning in closer to scan his expression.

"...kaeya?"

"my apologies," he tried to smile, covering his face with his free arm in embarrassment. no one has seen him like this before, and it was far too foreign for him. "especially when you let me use your room."

in response, you squeezed his hand, whispering, “it’s fine. i don’t think of you any differently.”

how do you always know exactly what to say? to grant him at least a little bit of privacy, you turn away as he quietly sobbed into his forearm.

after a while, he sniffles, saying, “i apologize. i don’t know what came over me.” trying to get some humor out of the situation, he adds, “well, i guess we are bonded for eternity now, aren’t we?”

you turned your head to face him, the furrow of your brows causing him to chuckle. “archons, you’re going to be the death of me,” you sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose.

“seeing how you saved me from death, that wouldn’t be fair, would it?” his foxy grin made you let out yet another exasperated sigh, but you still couldn’t help but smile slightly. it was obvious he was trying to act tough for you, but for now, you would follow along with his fantasy.

“alright, whatever. get some sleep.”

“and what about your sleeping arrangements?”

“i’ll manage. i’ve slept on the forest floor for missions, i can handle a hardwood floor.”

“oh? i couldn’t possibly let my savior sleep in such horrible conditions,” he teased. “won’t you join me in bed?”

“barbatos, give me strength,” you muttered.

he laughs softly, and you can feel your stomach tighten at the sound. even during such a rough moment, kaeya can still manage to put up a charming appearance. his single eye twinkled in the low dim of the candlelight, and you realized your falling for his sly tricks. “please, [name], won’t you grant a poor, injured man his dying wish?”

with a groan, you let go of his hand and climb into the bed beside him, careful not to touch him to avoid any unnecessary pain.

“i knew you were a saint!” he gives you a triumphant smile as you lay on your side to look at him. his tanned skin, though scratched, still was as enchanting as ever in the moonlight. the deep blue of his eye pulled you in deeper, and once again, you realized you were a victim of his charm. but, this was different—though he would never admit it, with your tender care of his wounds and unwavering support, he has unknowingly fell victim to your charm, too. his hand seeks out yours once again, intertwining your fingers.

neither of you commented on the continuation of the hand-holding, nor would you ever.

only then, as you two shared the cramped bed space, does kaeya come to a realization—he had you.

his grip on your hand tightened.

he has you.

#kaeya x reader #kaeya alberich #genshin impact kaeya #genshin impact #genshin kaeya #genshin x reader #kaeya headcanons #hurt/comfort #drabble #genshin imagines #how fucked am i if the word grimace reminds me of grimace shake #the brainrot has consumed me #tension

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fxckn-sxck-fr · 6 months ago

Note

❗❗ HEY ❗❗ I SAUR YEW ADD BUCKY BARNES TO YOUR MLIST 🫵🫵🫵 YOU AINT SLICK ❗❗

anywayssss would you be willing to rank your comic book men on least to most willing to kill for their darling? i know we got your opinion on dick but i wanna see how it compares to everyone else

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐂 𝐁𝐎𝐎𝐊 𝐌𝐄𝐍 𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐌𝐎𝐒𝐓 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐋𝐘 𝐓𝐎 𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋…

!!! GN reader, mentions of death/murder, violence, breaking bones, intimidation, threats, manipulation, general mental issues, biochemical attack (how the fuck did we get here), mutilation, self-harm, can be translated as either romantic or platonic.

Help, why did the beginning of this ask trigger my fight or flight for 0.2 seconds, LMAO. I dropped my phone like I was caught red-handed or some shit.

So, I initially made an oath to not answer any more asks until I either finish Life With Older Brother IV or my secret side project, but then I got this ask and figured I could use a little creative break. I’m hitting some brick walls right now with all of my writing projects, sobs.

So!! Here we go. Remember, this is in the order of least to most likely in a general sense. Featuring some new faces because I’m finally confident in depicting their comic book counterparts, yippee!!

Jaime Reyes: Obviously, if the scarab had its way, anyone who poses as a threat to Jaime’s beloved would be neutralized. But we’re talking about Jaime. As long as he’s in full control, he’d probably do everything in his power to not kill anyone, even if it’s for you. He knows he’s fucked in the head. No matter how hard he tries to convince himself it’s still just the scarab preying on his anxieties, it’s getting harder and harder to distinguish Khaji Da’s thoughts from his own. This spiral into insanity around his own morality and guilt would have him cling oh-so desperately to the idea that he’s still a hero. To him, the no-kill role is the only way to know for sure he’s still (kind of) himself.

Bruce Wayne: He’s The Batman. Of course he doesn’t kill. Sure, he may be a bit more violent towards potential threats when it comes to you, but he still doesn’t kill. It’s a core belief that he’ll stick to for as long as evil lurks in the shadows of Gotham. Besides, why would he need to kill when cracking a few ribs gets the message across just fine? Most people don’t even want to fuck with him in the first place; both as Bruce Wayne and especially The Batman. In many cases, simple intimidation will do the trick. It’s much neater than violence. Though violence is definitely still on the table when he’s in a mood (Alfred, for the last time, he does not need a therapist. He’s perfectly functional).

Clark Kent: Whereas Batman doesn’t kill, Superman can’t kill. Meaning, Clark is well aware of the image he has to uphold as the ever-so hopeful Man of Tomorrow. Which is actually fine by him. Due to his strong sense of morals, the thought of blood on his hands makes him sick to his stomach. But there are some cases where that dark voice in the back of his mind whispers he could easily snap the neck of that weirdo talking to you. Of course, this is clearly just a strange intrusive thought, and he guiltily shakes it out of his head the moment it appears. He’s Superman, for heaven’s sake! He’s better than that! Stooping to that level is simply not an option. But you know what is an option? Gripping people hard enough that their bones shatter. Accidents do happen, after all…

Wally West: The chances of him killing are very slim. Believe it or not, he’s not against the idea or anything (only when it comes to you), it’s just he doesn’t see the need to get his hands dirty. There are enough tactics in his arsenal that the thought won’t even cross his mind. A silver tongue can work miracles on its own, and standing at 6 feet tall, Wally can be surprisingly intimidating in his own right. Should there be any threat agains you, he’s more focused on getting you out of harm’s way than beating the shit out of anyone (that comes later, away from your prying eyes). At worst, anyone who pushes their luck will get fractures and road rashes as a result. Killing just isn’t an impulse Wally has. But if it absolutely has to happen… well, wouldn’t that be a shame?

Dick Grayson: As mentioned before in a previous ask, killing is off the table. Dick’s still a hero, and heroes don’t kill. It’s just that he miiiight accidentally lose control if he sees you in a critical state. The ask goes into much deeper detail than this, but to sum it up, he would feel devastated afterwards but eventually justify it to himself. It was to protect you… if he didn’t do it, god only knows what would’ve happened. Otherwise, he’s not one to get his hands dirty like that. The most he’ll do is deliver a very ominous threat that doesn’t outright mean he’s going to kill anyone, but the implications aren’t very pretty. And, if he can help it, he’d rather if you’re not in earshot. Unless if he somehow sees it as a good manipulation tactic. Then sure, you can hear all about how he’s going to drown someone in their own bathroom.

Peter Parker: He has a strong aversion to killing. Now, is that an outright no? As much as he’d like to think so, there are situations where no-kill is optional. Most of them involve you being in active danger. While he doesn’t go out of his way to kill anyone, he sure as hell isn’t thinking about the survivability of his rampage to make sure you’re safe. Causalities would be collateral damage; unfortunate, but possibly necessary. He also has a habit of threatening people’s lives when he’s particularly pissed off. As long as you’re not in some sort of critical state, he usually doesn’t follow through with them (and may even feel guilty afterwards). That being said, hearing your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man deliver a cold one-liner about wanting someone dead is still hella scary.

Steve Rogers: Listen, it’s not at all what he wants. He wouldn’t advocate for murdering your problems away both with or without the shield. But sometimes — just sometimes — it’s necessary. Of course he’d kill someone that posed as a threat to your personal safety. That doesn’t make him a terrible person or anything; most people would do that for their loved ones. Where the line starts to blur, however, is when there isn’t any immediate danger. Does that weirdo who was looking at you for too long count? God— no, Rogers. What is wrong with you?! But… then again, there was this look in their eyes… something’s just so off about them. Ultimately, Steve wouldn’t go through with it, but the thought does cross his mind. Not that he’d ever admit it, of course.

Hal Jordan: The answer is yes, but mostly because he’s a Lantern. Sometimes, neutralizing the threat is necessary. He would absolutely kill if it meant saving your life. Is it ideal? Absolutely not. Is it cathartic?… Lowkey. Hal’s not afraid to abuse his right as a Lantern to “neutralize the threat.” But keep in mind that this is a rare occurrence that depends on his mood. Really, he only considers it for situations you’re extremely distressed by, like some piece of shit giving you the creeps. He wouldn’t kill for his own personal gain, as much as he sometimes wants to; this is all about you, not him. I also don’t really see him having regrets. If he wants someone dead, he absolutely means it.

Remy LeBeau: It’s simple; if he’s gotta do it, he’s gotta do it. He’s got not moral hang-ups when it comes to killing. He doesn’t do it often, but he’s willing to clean up a mess or two if needed. The need to kill ranges from your personal safety to just not liking someone’s vibe. If that were the case, he’d give the poor sucker more than enough hints to leave you alone. Murder would be a last resort should they not listen; which is totally on them, by the way. Gambit can’t help it if they’re not the sharpest tool in the shed. Is kinetically charging someone’s car to explode not enough of a warning or something? Man, what is wrong with people these days…

Tim Drake: Okay. Tim is just so versatile. Yes, he’s absolutely morally opposed to killing. Yes, it’s a necessary evil. Yes, the thought of it makes him want to throw up. Yes, he’d do it in a heartbeat for you. Somehow, all of these thoughts coexist in his sick little head. What makes Tim a threat is the fact he’s extremely unstable. One day, he’s got himself in check; god, he would never kill anyone, why would he do that?! Then the next day, he seems to have a change of heart; if anyone even looks your way, he’s dumping anthrax in their cereal. His preferred method is something clean, but if he’s in a particularly bad mood, he may revert to some mutilation with his nails. On those particularly violent days, he’d much rather harm himself than others, but there is something cathartic about scratching at someone else while sobbing about minute problems. Though that’s one hell of a “did I do that” moment when it’s over.

Scott Summers: Yes. And he’ll fucking do it again, too. When it comes to you, this man has killed people by accident before. Did he give a shit? Absolutely not. Why would he care if someone doesn’t know how to protect their spinal column when taking a blow; especially if it’s someone who dared to lay a hand on you? And, yeah, he’s supposed to be a good role model for mutants all over the globe, but a good leader knows how to take calculated risks when needed. Your safety is his top priority, meaning he’ll do whatever he deems necessary to keep danger away. Man, is it just absolutely brutal watching someone’s skin melt away from the friction of one continuous optic blast. Who knew he could cave in skulls with that shit?

Bucky Barnes: Let’s be honest, is anyone surprised? Yeah, that’s what I thought. You could simply point to someone you hate and they’d be gone within the next 24 hours. Bucky isn’t here to fuck around. While he may regret any kills he was forced to carry out, he sure as hell doesn’t regret the ones he’s actively choosing to do. If anything, his conditioning has left him no other way to show his total devotion to you. Yes, this means you he leaves fresh human hearts at your doorstep. Yes, this means he strings up the remains of your annoying colleagues where you can see them outside. Yes, this means he watches you sleep while caked in blood and guts after every nightly kill. Some small part of him knows it’s wrong, but he really could not give less of a shit. So much for trying to reform him…

#❥ CALL INCOMING: DO YOU LIKE SCARY MOVIES?#❥ TW: YANDERE #❥ YANDERE CHARACTER #❥ PLATONIC YANDERE #❥ ROMANTIC YANDERE #❥ YANDERE BRUCE WAYNE #❥ YANDERE BUCKY BARNES #❥ YANDERE CLARK KENT #❥ YANDERE DICK GRAYSON #❥ YANDERE HAL JORDAN #❥ YANDERE JAIME REYES #❥ YANDERE PETER PARKER #❥ YANDERE REMY LEBEAU #❥ YANDERE SCOTT SUMMERS #❥ YANDERE STEVE ROGERS #❥ YANDERE TIM DRAKE #❥ YANDERE WALLY WEST #❥ YANDERE VARIOUS X READER #❥ GN READER

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brainworms-all-night-long · 8 months ago

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Hello hi, I'm Brainworms and this be an all inclusive intro to the hellspace that's my brain and this blog!! Do not attempt to find any parallels in my blorbos to my behavior and desires I promise it says nothing about the very core of me as a living being haha

I also have a Bsky and PillowFort in case this place kicks the bucket fr

And if you feeling like you have a lot of money and don't know where to put it, you can Commission me (OPEN) or Buy Me a Coffe!! I am currently saving up for a new phone and headphones

While you're still here, please donate to these fundraisers for Sahar Shehab, Maryam, Wasim, Heba Al-Dahdouh, Mahmoud and Ali as I'm unable to do so myself

Every silly appearing above lives full time in my brain and refuses to pay the mortgage, in fact, is very adamant they will never do so. Henceforth, I yap about them sometimes!! Some more than others *coughNinecough* but they are always present

>Now to the tags I actively use!!

sonic prime / sonic the hedgehog / miles nine prower – The most of thoughts at the actual documented begining of life for this blog, and I like Nine!! A lot!! A character made specifically for me I think....

murder drones / arcane / nimona 2023 / dreamtale (UTMV) – Other stuff besides Sonic that I draw and yap about, although this is still mainly a Sonic blog

me does arts / littol doodl / actually finished doodl – My art tags!! I've been drawing the same character for over two years now help :D Have no idea why I decided to split them into three separate categories but I believe the names are pretty self explanatory

me when I finish writing – I do a drable or two sometimes as well just, don't expect for me to actually finish anything I start writing even though I say I will, that tag name is a lie

the silly text box – answered asks whenever I remember to use the tag lmao

silly brainworms – my yappings, Nine character analyses and headcanons!!

There's no talk tag, if you see my random unrelated thoughts, it was destined and once in a lifetime event

>I also have a few AUs but mostly of the "What if crossover" variety

Prime bros – a more or less non committed collaborative effort of random.headcanons and drables between me and @/000marie198 and anyone else who has thoughts and wants to join in on the fun on the idea of having the Shatterverse foxes (Nine, Sails, Mangey and Tails) living together in green hill and causing mayhem because the way the show left them was bullshit and unsatisfying!!

The same but different is my own personal version of the prime bros universe that is now actually being incredibly slowly written and the first three chapters are on my Ao3!!

Project 09 – a Tails gets adopted by Eggman AU except it's Nine getting "adopted" by the Chaos Council and to no one's surprise, it fucks him and everyone else up in a special way

Over the hills – is a Dreamtale and Sonic crossover brought on by The Nine-tailed travel guide through the multiverse event conceived by @/Donelywell and mashed with my long time held dreamswap au idea of Dream taking Night and running away from the village after taking some drastic measures that is also posted on Ao3!! (more stuff will come to it in time. I hope)

running from a Nightmare – another Dreamtale au, this time about corrupted Nightmare being set loose on the Sonic world by none other than Eggman and the suffering that comes with it (also fighting tooth and tail to get it written)

the n 'n n's (read as m&m's) – unserious crossover where I put Nine Night and Nimona together and have them be silly (perhaps Nuzi will tag along some day too...)

And because I keep having Dreamtale & Sonic thoughts, I do lump them all together under the dreamtale and sonic tomfoolery tag!!

prime arcane – as seen above, I like arcane!! Jinx and Nine are eerily similar in their sibling and identity struggles, I put them together, boom an Au :D other characters are there too but I need to get around actually designing them....

>This will get updated in case I get possessed by something new or remember a tag I forgor

——

Hey you scrolled this far might as well put some more random trivia abt me here :D

>paleontology and zoology nerd, but only as an avid listener to four hour YouTube documentaries, I don't actually know shit- (Miniminuteman, Casual Geo and Lydnsey Nikole hyper carry this special interest shoutout to them)

>Obviously a followup to previous point needed, favorite dinosaur is the Archeopterix and the animal ever is the Blunt Headed Tree Snake (which is also my Sonicsona by the name of Shoelace)

>I have a pet snake, her name is Ebi and is a black head spider python!!

> Graduating a four years study of Mechanical engineering in a weeks time I also have no fucking clue what I'm doing ill be happy if this is finally over

>Favorite color is pink!! (In case you couldn't tell by my art and this whole post lmao) I went through a goddamn hero's journey to learn to love it alright you can pry the seven plain hot pink shirts and hoodies I own from my cold dead hands

>I'm Slovak!! Niečo niečo hokej, Tatry, a zlatý Bažant

>Aro, Ace and Agender (that's where the AAA battery comes in lmao)

>undiagnosed but there's.... something...

> I could recite the story of the ugly duckling backwards as a kid (unrelated to previous two points)

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deceit-and-knowledge · 20 days ago

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Ooc: The conversation~~~~

Ft this (feel free to pry into their brains on @deceit-and-doubt or @truth-and-compassion )

(also sorry bird anon you have to third wheel lmao feel free to bully smilk about it)

shadow milk opened the door after taking a deep breath, entering into pure vanilla's bedroom.

Walking in his chest full of anxiety, not letting himself show it on his face but his weak body was definitely crumbling beneath it.

"...hey.."

he spoke softly.. clearly upset and bothered by the potential of a fight.

"hello.." pure vanilla responded, his voice tense, he looked towards shadow milk, standing up from his plush bed, the once usually warm room felt cold and like you could cut the air with a knife.

The weather outside matching the air within the room, stormy and cold like an explosion of thunder or rain had been brewing. He looked at him with a concerned expression but not his usual calm soft concern this one was more of "I am on the brink of having a panic attack"..

"bluebird.. please.. you know why I want to talk." Pure vanilla chokes out, his worry clearly made him ill. He's clenching his stomach which can only be filled with a dark pit of concern.

A sickening dark pit.

"...i.. do.." shadow milk answers, looking away at the ground next to him, his face blushed from the shame and guilt he feels. "Then tell me, what's going on.. please.." pure vanilla pleads. Shadow milk jolts in sudden anger. "WHY SHOULD I TELL YOU! YOU'LL JUST GET MAD AT ME!" he screams.

"because I love you.. I am not going to get angry I merely want answers.." pure vanilla assures, gently reaching up to caress shadow milk's cheek. His eyes leer at him, his main with disdain and anger but the ones within the void of his hair look in worry and sadness, embarassment even.

"Fine.. but I don't know how to word it.. I'm going to trust you with something I never trust anyone with.. if you truly love me, any secret you gather from this should never be brought up again!.." he states a command as he hands over a pile of books from a portal. All diaries. "These are all my diaries from before you arrived at the spire til now. Approximately 3 150 paged ones." He pouts. "Read them.. they have all my dumb secrets and weird emotions.. connect the dots between them and you'll figure out what bothers me. Also why I keep this from you..." Shadow milk admits.

So pure vanilla sits down, picking up diary after diary, turning page after page, word after word, he reads. Every line is dripping with emotion and feeling, hurt, love, happiness, fear, sadness, heartbreak, anger. Thoughts of betrayal, admittance of shyness, as if you looked into him and unraveled him. Every word explained everything. New information pure vanilla didn't know prior about this cookie he loved so.

It ended up being 5 diaries. Some with pages torn out.

"do you.. understand.." shadow milk asked softly, sounding like he's about to cry, he looked humiliated as he watched pure vanilla read his secrets. "I do.. thank you.. I'm sorry you've been so afraid for this long.. I couldn't be that comfort you truly needed.." pure vanilla apologises. "...why are YOU sorry.. I fucked up.. I'm so scared to be alone.." shadow milk cries.

"and you don't have to be.. I'll never leave you.." pure vanilla exclaims, bringing the jester into a hug.

"everything will be alright, blueberry.." he says softly. He feels the clown begin jitter and twitch as he cries into his shoulder. He rubs his hand down his back, up and down, patting it on occasion as he soothes him with a hum.

Soon cradling him in his arms like a child, sat on the bed, the two together. "You mean everything to me, shadow milk cookie.. I adore you and everything you are, I'm so sorry you fear loneliness so much, I know that feeling.. it's crushing. I know I'll never understand how it feels to watch the children you adored grow up and know they'll one day leave you but unfortunately that's life.. just know you improved their lives more than any cookie could ever improve it, you gave them a home and love.. they'll forever be indebted to you, even if they spread their wings and leave the nest.." pure vanilla gently explains. "I know you deny it, but they're your children.. you see yourself as their parent.. I hope you know they'll forever see you as their dad.. "

"and please.. be reminded, there's no need to be so insecure around me.. I love you with all my heart, you shouldn't fear expressing your emotions to me, I understand my statement is rather hypocritical but we're both trying and learning, but we should be learning together not alone.. some tasks can't be done alone." He explains.

"So please.. let's be in this together.. we share a soul, we should be able to understand each other and not hide away.. there's no reason to be afraid anymore...I'm your boyfriend..." He reassures, gently stroking the back of shadow milk's head.

"...so.. you love me..?" Shadow milk asks, seemingly in denial. "Alot, yes.." pure vanilla replies, his voice quiet and sweet.

"...how much exactly..numbers..?" Shadow milk responds, he sounds tired, insecure. "I'm not sure I can even count to it..haha.. it's a rather large number, I'm not sure if it's an existing number.. I might have to make up an entirely new set of numbers.." pure vanilla chuckles. He takes shadow milk off his shoulder, holding him up on his lap. Looking him in the eyes he speaks with love laced words. "I love you bluebird.. I'm sorry for everything you're going through.. especially that scare.. I'm not sure why I even remotely belived it... But.. what if we were to say....start a family..?" Pure vanilla asks.

Shadow milk stares in silence. "Would you want to? I'm fine without, I have custard cookie the third.." pure vanilla asks, he sounds fine and happy as if this isn't bothering him, though that's merely shadow milk's own thoughts plaguing him.

"... I'm... not sure.. that d..doesn't bother you, does it?.." he asks, in a stammer. "Obviously not.. we have eternity ahead of us, besides.. we haven't even discussed the potential of marriage.. though I'm getting ahead of ourselves, I'm just so love struck with you.. you little heart stealer you~" pure vanilla teases, pinching shadow milk's cheek extremely gently.

He then kisses shadow milk's lips with gentle care. Feeling the usually cold cookie flush up in bashful heat. Soon removing himself from him shadow milk floats off and above pure vanilla, still near and in front of him. He wipes his mouth which pure vanilla laughs at. "Still not used to kisses are you?" The king questions, look towards his precious jester. "Absolutely not." He hisses in response.

The touch starved yet touch hating cat looks at pure vanilla, leering at him with his heterochromatic blue eyes.

"though I have a question for you before you leave which I know you're going to.. why did you make lingerie?" Pure vanilla asks, with the head tilt of a confused puppy.

"...W..what!?.." shadow milk stutters. "Why do you?" Pure vanilla asks with a smirk. "To know I even OWN that you would've gone into my room and snooped around, you little gnat!" Shadow milk yells, clearly embarrassed. "Why did you make that? Quit avoiding the question~" pure vanilla's asks again in some dumb flirting attempt. The jester's eyes go wide as he squeals. "QUIT AVO- UGH. WHY ELSE WOULD I MAKE THAT! WHY WOULD ONE PURCHASE LINGERIE!?"

"why would you make it?" Pure vanilla states again with a shit eating grin, his face blushed, clearly thinking about it. "UGH TO TURN YOU ON.." shadow milk shouts. "Oh~ well now.. h-" "NO." shadow milk blurts out. "Y-You're being.. WAAAY TOO FLIRTY!" he shrieks before storming out in a fluster. Pure vanilla laughs knowing he'll be back later with vengeance.

He lays down, feeling relaxed now such a weight is off his chest, he caresses the diary pile next to him, taking one and hugging it onto his chest.

"I'm so glad this is over.." he sighs.

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apollosgiftofprophecy · 10 months ago

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The Copollogism Essays - Part 1: The Tent Scene

SO. Here we are. I have absolutely ascended to insane over two fictional characters' relationship by this point, and this will merely cement that into place.

I do not know how often I will update this, but rest assured I have it all figured out! I'll update with links below for easy access to the other posts as I analyze our favorite dumpsterfire ship >:3

Believe me when I say I have Thoughts™️

These essays will detail the scenes Apollo & Commodus have shared, as well as a look into how it affected them and we'll also take a look into where it stands in the toxic relationship territory (The answer may surprise you. Or not. I am not quite sure myself at this point in time LMAO).

Additionally, I will be giving my own thoughts on a few things I've noticed within the series. I will refrain from talking about my own personal headcanons and focus on what we're given in the books, as well as any and all historical facts from Commodus's life that relate to their lives/relationship.

From The Book: Part 1 (The Tent) ~ Part 2 (The Assassination) ~ Part 3 (Lester's Reaction) ~ Part 4 (Leo's Questions/Seeing Commodus Again) ~ Part 5 (The Arena) ~ Part 6 (The Waystation) ~ Part 7 (The Yacht) ~ Part 8 (The Final Moment)

Analysis: Part 1 (Apollo and Commodus as Individuals) ~ Part 2 (Toxic Relationship?) ~ Part 3 (Codependent - Or Is It?) ~ Part 4 (Other Thoughts)

Let us kick off with the infamous: Tent Scene.

The Tent Scene

All quotations from The Dark Prophecy

Let's break it down.

I could certainly sympathize with his feelings. Marcus Aurelius was the sternest, most powerful father in the world aside from my own father, Zeus. Both loved to lecture. Both loved to remind their offspring how lucky they were, how privileged, how far short they fell of their fathers’ expectations. And of course, both had gorgeous, talented, tragically underappreciated sons.

How their fathers treat them is certainly a focal point of their relationship, with Apollo knowing enough about Commodus's feelings on Marcus Aurelius to be willing to compare it to his own relationship with Zeus (which is...honestly worse than Commodus & Marcus's).

“My father made me his junior co-emperor when I was fifteen, Apollo. It’s stifling. All duty, all the time. Then he married me off to that horrid girl Bruttia Crispina. Who names their child Bruttia?”

We're told that Commodus has been co-emperor since he was 15 - certainly a young age by modern standards, but rather par for the course in Roman times. However, that does not mean the pressure of being co-emperor wouldn't be a lot on 15-18 year old Commodus.

He is a teenager, after all. And he is a teenager that is rather abhorred to responsibility.

I didn’t mean to laugh at the expense of his distant wife…but part of me was pleased when he talked badly about her. I wanted all his attention for myself.

Oh, Apollo sweetie...you have issues too XD

Wanting to keep your lover's attention to yourself? Yeah, sorry Apollo, but that's not a good sign. This just goes to show that they are both toxic influences, and they brought out the worst in each other.

“I’ll make peace with the barbarians,” he said immediately. “Then we’ll go home and celebrate with games. The best games, all the time. I’ll gather the most exotic animals in the world. I’ll fight them personally in the Colosseum—tigers, elephants, ostriches.” I laughed at that. “Ostriches? Have you ever even seen an ostrich?” “Oh, yes.” He got a wistful look in his eyes. “Amazing creatures. If you trained them to fight, perhaps designed some sort of armor for them, they would be incredible.” “You’re a handsome idiot.” I threw another grape, which bounced off his forehead. A brief flash of anger washed over his face.

Leaving this here for future reference but we WILL be coming back to it!!!! In a future post!!!!

I knew my sweet Commodus could have an ugly temper. He was a little too fond of slaughter. But what did I care? I was a god. I could speak to him in ways no one else dared.

Apollo is the ONE PERSON who is able to challenge Commodus. And from the previous passage, we can infer Commodus is not used to it, even though he is well aware Apollo is the one with all the power in this relationship - although, he sure does like forgetting about that detail a lot lmao

Commodus looked at me, panic in his eyes. “Go,” I said, as calmly as I could, forcing down my misgivings. “You will always have my blessings. You will do fine.”

A sweet thing I find in this section is; 1) Commodus looks to Apollo for comfort, for some sort of it will be fine; and 2) that Apollo is encouraging despite his misgivings. Apollo is aware what kind of leader Commodus could be. He knows there is a high chance of his lover becoming a worse version of himself.

In fact, he even admits it;

But I already suspected what would happen: the young man I knew and loved was about to be consumed by the emperor he would become.

But he tries to go the you have my support, you have my love route. Romantic, but ultimately, it's not enough to keep Commodus from the path he goes down.

into the mouth of the wolf, Apollo says. Because this is the last time he truly sees the man he loved.

The next time they meet? It will be a crazed, paranoid tyrant he has to end - and in doing so, breaks the promise he once made.

He rose and kissed me one last time. His breath smelled of grapes. Then he left the tent—walking, as the Romans would say, into the mouth of the wolf.

This whole, entire scene? It's drenched in a tragic aura. It starts out light and teasing, but it ends with this.

This is their final kiss. This is the final time they get to see each other without the barrier of betrayal between them.

And that, is truly heartbreaking.

#ramblings of an oracle #IT'S OFFICAL ALDER'S OFF THE DEEP END SEND HELP #911 NEED TO REPORT AN EMERGENCY #the trials of apollo #copollo #toa analysis #apollodus #apollo x commodus #trials of apollo #the dark prophecy #pjo hoo toa #toa #toa apollo #toa commodus #pjo apollo #pjo commodus

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honest-moth-of-silver-grove · 1 year ago

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Hello! I hope you're doing well 🥰

If the requests are open could you do some headcanons for Trevor, Sypha and Alucard with a court jester S/O? (They may be currently courtless). They're fun and snarky and they love their partners laugh however rare it may be - so they make it their mission to get them to crack up as often as possible.

I just think it'd be really cute lmao

Thanks!

A/N: Oh my gosh! This is such a cute ask! @metkapop Sorry if it’s bad, I just could not focus at all today.

🎭 Castlevania Trio w/ A Court Jester S/O HC: 🎭

Trio:

If anyone could use some cheering up, it’s these three lol.

After all the three have been through, genuine laughter is hard to come by.

That’s where our Court Jester S/O comes in.

They’re smart, and quick-witted, and pretty fast on their feet. They probably come into the trio’s life sometime after S4 ends. Currently courtless, they were traveling in search of a new court when they came across Village Belmont- a small but thriving new settlement, complete with a huge castle right in the middle, so they assumed there must be some sort of royal court inside.

They’re very impressed by the way things are run/ruled: it’s not exactly a democracy, but it certainly isn’t a monarchy either, which sort of takes the pressure off. It’s easier to be naturally comedic when you don’t have to tailor all of your humor towards one /almighty/ ruler.

They’re immediately drawn to the trio. I mean, who wouldn't be? Lol. But it’s more than mere fascination, they feel a sort of responsibility to cheer them up. Hearing their stories, hearing of all the trials and trauma they went through, our Court Jester makes up their mind to do everything in their power to make each of the trio laugh.

Trevor:

Trevor is the second hardest of the group to make laugh. He’s not against humor, and he has a habit of making witty comments under his breath, but he’s tired as all hell. It’s hard to laugh when you’re just so exhausted. After all, it’s not every day you get in a fight with Death and win. Needless to say, the guy needs some recovery time.

But he does love a good sarcastic joke, especially if it’s teasing Alucard, or poking light fun at any of the superstitions the villagers have. Knowing so much about the truth of monster hunting it’s easy to sort of scoff/laugh at other people’s ignorance surrounding it.

For example, one night, there were rumors an untethered group of vampires was heading in the castle’s general direction. Whether they were hellbent on bloodshed or negotiation was another question entirely, one that mattered not to the people.

Going about his day, Trevor kept smelling garlic everywhere, which was odd, because there wasn’t any garland or garlic visible. After the stench became unbearable (it kept making Sypha’s morning sickness worse), he sought out Greta for answers.

At the time Greta was conversing with our Court Jester S/O, laughing about something they said. When Trevor interrupted and asked why the hell he kept smelling garlic everywhere, Greta confided that a few of the villagers got in their heads that if they bathed in garlic water, vampires couldn’t touch them… To which our Jester replied, “Oh yeah. Because seasoned food is way less enticing.”

Trevor let out a chuckle but otherwise held his tongue. It was only when he made it back inside to Sypha that he broke down in a fit of laughter as he relayed the information. The two’s hysterics could be heard outside. It was the perfect combination of sleep deprivation and hilarity that sent Trevor over the edge.

From that day forward, whenever Trevor was in desperate need of a laugh, Jester would sneak a bulb of garlic into one of his pockets, before hiding and awaiting the snickers that were sure to follow.

Sypha:

Sypha laughs the most, although, not as much as she used to before meeting Trevor and going on this journey with him. The last few months they spent together on the road changed the way she looked at people and life. She’s still positive and always wants the best for everyone, but she’s hesitant, and much more guarded now.

With Trevor back, everything seemed possible again. She didn’t feel as alone and lost. But there’s still a lot she has to carry. Being pregnant, leading a village, watching over Alucard, and helping Trevor heal take up most of her energy, leaving little left for an appreciation of humor.

That doesn’t deter her Court Jester S/O though, nope! Not at all! They just try harder to see Sypha smile.

They help her with whatever chores Sypha’s doing at the moment, making pleasant conversation, and trying some banter. When that doesn’t work, Jster opts for a more physical approach. They offer to carry a stack of papers down to the cellar before tripping and falling three-stooges-style down the stairs. The paper goes flying everywhere, like confetti. But before Sypha can even blink, they pop back up, their little bells jingling as they do so: “I’m okay!” Cue paper continuing to fall comedically around them.

Sypha is stunned with concern for a moment before she starts to giggle. One giggle, then twp, before she’s holding her swollen belly laughing. “That was perfect,” she says. “But for safety purposes, let’s try not to do that again.”

Jester is careful, but they don’t stop the physical humor completely. They love making moves, even Sypha can’t see coming. For example, when Sypha uses her Speaker magic to conjure floating ice steps, Jester will try to climb up onto it from below, even going as far to get a ladder if they have to, just to slide themselves over the edge and start to do pull-ups on it. Yes, it’s slippery and hazardous, but Jester knows how to fall. They’ve done it so many times, they’re practically an expert by now lol.

The sheer zaniness of Jester’s actions never fails to bring a knowing smile to Sypha’s face. She just asks that they promise not to act that way when her baby comes around, lest they teach her kid any ideas.

Alucard:

Alucard is by far the hardest to make laugh. He’s much more introverted and stoic than the other two. That’s not to say he doesn’t laugh or doesn’t enjoy humor- he does, but it’s much quieter and more subtle than the others.

Alucard was under a lot of pressure at the end of S4, especially before Trevor seemingly returned from the dead. His stress levels were through the roof, even if he tried hiding it.

In all the chaos, the one thing Alucard found brought him the most joy was playing with the kids in the village. He liked hearing them laugh as he chased after them from above, or snuck up on them when playing hide and seek. It reminded him so much of how his parents would play with him when he was a little boy growing up in the castle.

This of course doesn’t go unnoticed by his Jester S/O, who makes a secret pact with the orphaned children to play a funny prank on Alucard when he’s least expecting it.

The timing just so happened to work out perfectly. It happens just after the first snow of the season. The ground becomes coated in heavy, packing snow- perfect for making snowmen and snowballs. Jester and the children get bundled up and build two modest, unsuspecting forts. Then Jester asks Alucard to come help them referee the children's snowball fight. With a bit of begging, Alucard relents, happy to give Trevor and Sypha some alone time with their new baby.

Unbeknownst to Alucard however, is that he is the intended target of the snowball fight. And that the two forts are stocked full of pre-made snowballs ready to launch on hidden catapults, perfect for surprisingly even the smartest of dhampir.

Once Alucard gets into position, and gives the signal for the fight to begin, the kids unleash their snowball fury. They get a good few solid hits in before Alucard’s brain catches up to the fact he’s been bamboozled. He makes a move to super-speed away but not before Jester and a handful of other older kids tackle Alucard to the ground. Yes, they all end up getting pulled with snowball after snowball from their makeshift catapult contraption, but the snow in their hair and all over their clothes is well worth it.

Alucard, covered in snow and ice, and now freezing children throws his head back and laughs- a deep genuine laugh.

How surprising human joy is to him, even after all of this time. It’s infectious, and Alucard finds himself grateful to be amongst friends.

After everyone’s nose starts to freeze, he ushers the children back inside their respective homes, promising to play with everyone again tomorrow.

Once he and Jester are back inside, he offers to make tea for the two of them. Jester of course accepts graciously, still warming themselves by the fire. Alucard leaves for the kitchen, but not before lobbing one perfectly formed snowball right at Jester’s back. Revenge was a dish best served cold after all.

I hope you enjoyed it! If you did, don’t forget to Reblog!

Once again, the cute daisy chain divider is courtesy of @cafekitsune !

#castlevania imagines #castlevania imagine #castlevania x reader #alucard imagine #trevor belmont imagine #sypha belnades imagine #alucard x reader #trevor belmont x reader #sypha x reader #castlevania trio x reader #castlevania #hc

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