#@ my brain. what happened to all the self ship dreams I was having can i pls have one again
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fitzselfships · 1 month ago
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I have been having really upsetting dreams lately (had one last night that has been Really bothering me) so I'm going to try cuddling with my Zooble plush since I usually don't have dreams like that when I sleep with them
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cherrysnax · 2 years ago
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keep havin dreams abt hs, I think my brains looking for closure or sumn
#today it was graduation m#maybe this’ll be the end#this one was more based in truth#a very specific type of heartbreak#one that I was over like. a week after it happened but it happened nonetheless#and a different one#one for a friendship I coulda had (and did funnily enough) and another for friendships I coulda kept#it’s been years. I don’t get it#im a different person life has moved on#I don’t get it man#what closure do I want? that things would’ve been fine if I was fuckinh normal#I get that#I do the thing where I assume everyone hates me and then I dip#I get it: I know that I’m not a good person. I know that I probably hurt people in my attempts to hurt myself#I know that self isolating was a bad choice but it’s tucking over man. nothing was as black n white as ohhh all my friends hate me#they tried to like me man. I had issues and problems and did everyone else. the difference is they handled there’s and I couldn’t.#it’s been years since I’ve rlly thought abt hs but this year it’s been like a dream a week#is my brain trying to warn me that I’m regressing? I don’t think I will or can just dip#im happy. ive unlearned so many unhealthy things man: im doing so much better. I want to live and be happy and make friends and have a job#is it my brain urging me to talk to people? ehhh that ship has sailed. we r all differnt ppl and I never fit#I don’t want to have these dreams anymore. they were gone for a while but this one fucked me up and I woke up crying and idk why#these dreams keep circling back to a crush I had in hs but im unpacking now that I just wanted to be his friend. and I think he did too but#either to him or the friend group. both of the friend groups#I fucked up both just the second one slower because im a flake and a loser :)#reaching out is a bad idea because it’ll only serve me (and even then it wouldn’t) it would not do anything positive for anyone else and#people have grown so much and I am just a relic they probably try to ignore and I don’t blame them#no one’s thinking of me or losing any sleep over me so it’s okay to just be a memory and hope it’s more fond than anything else#man. I wonder if it’s because I’m so convinced I’m gonna die this year
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olivianyx · 11 months ago
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OMGG I JUST GOT RESULTS WITHOUT BEATING MYSELF UP WITH ROUTINES 😭 + RANT ✨
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HEYY LUVS! I JUST WANNA SHARE MY RESULTS I MANIFESTED WITHIN 2-3 DAYS! THIS YEAR'S GONNA BE MY BEST YEAR Y'ALL ✋AND GUESS WHAT I DID? NOTHING. LITERALLY NOTHING. NUH-UH. PERIODT.
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⚠ LONG POST AHEAD, SWEARING ⚠
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WHAT I MANIFESTED:
🪄 PASSING MY FRESHMAN YEAR WITH HIGH SCORES
🪄 MY FAMILY BOUGHT A NEW APARTMENT WHICH WERE PREPARING TO MOVE IN 3 WEEKS
🪄 ME GETTING INTO THE VOID STATE 😭 AND MANIFESTED CLEAR SKIN! (DAYUM GETTING INTO THE VOID IS DEFO VERY EASY OMGG)
🪄 GETTING LESS ANXIOUS LATELY!
🪄 MY GASTRITIS AND ULCERITIS GETTING CURED
🪄 GETTING MORE COMPLIMENTS IN MY UNI!
🪄 GETTING TALLER! I WENT FROM 5'3" TO 5'7" IN 2 DAYS 😭😭
🪄 GETTING DREAMS OF ME SHIFTING TO MY WR 🥺 (ACTUALLY RESPAWNING LOL, AS THIS THING IS REALLY CONTROVERSIAL IN HERE, PLEASE DON'T GET ME CANCELLED- I'M DOING DEATHLESS RESPAWNING ✋)
🪄 MY MIND IS SURPRISINGLY CALM 😌 THERE'S STILL INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS THO (THOSE ARE ANNOYING ASS BITCHES) BUT I JUST IGNORE EM LIKE I IGNORE PEOPLE AT SCHOOL 🗿
🪄 GOT MANY CONFESSIONS TOO 😭 AND I REJECTED EM ALL, CUS I JUST WANT TO BE SINGLE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE ✋🗿 JK
🪄 GETTING COOL CLOTHES THAT MY MOM DENIED A LOTTA TIMES! (ACTUALLY I'VE ORDERED EM BUT STILL HAVEN'T SHIPPED TO MY ADDRESS YET LOL)
🪄 MY CRUSH BECOMING CLOSE TO ME HEHE 🤭 LIKE SHE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT ME MUCH, BUT LATELY SHE'S BEEN TOO CLOSE TO ME AND ALWAYS WANNA BE WITH ME LOL, 3 DAYS BACK SHE AND I WALKED HOME TOGETHER, WHILE WE GRABBED SOME SNACKS, SPOKE ABT EACH OTHER AND ALL (I FELT LIKE BEING IN A SHOUJO MANGA 😩)
🪄 A NEW PHONE! THAT SAMSUNG GALAXY S22 😩
I MANIFESTED EVERYTHING WITHIN 3 DAYS 😭 I REALLY CAN'T BELIEVE MY EYES, JUST. 3. FUCKING. DAYS. GODDAMMIT.
HOW I DID IT:
JUST FULFILLED IT IN MY IMAGINATION
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YEP, YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT. I LIVED IN THE 4D REALITY, I NEVER GAVE A SHIT ABOUT THE 3D AT ALL. OK LEMME BREAK IT DOWN FOR Y'ALL SO JUST PAY ATTENTION FROM HERE ONWARDS.
🪄 SUPPOSE SOMETHING UNDESIRABLE OR UNFAVORABLE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE HAPPENING IN YOUR 3D. WHO'S THE CAUSE FOR THAT? YOU. 'BUT I DIDN'T IMAGINE OR THINK OF THESE 😭' BABY, YOU'RE THE SOLE CAUSE, EFFECT, AND THE SOLUTION. THERE'S NO OTHER EXPLANATION TO THIS.
🪄 AS WE ALL KNOW, 3D IS A MIRROR. RIGHT? WHATEVER YOU THINK ABOUT, YOUR ASSUMPTIONS, YOUR THOUGHTS, YOUR FEELINGS, YOUR PERSPECTIVE EVERYTHING WILL BE REFLECTED. SO WHY NOT THINK THE WAY YOU WANT SO YOU CAN EXPERIENCE THE SAME? GET IT.
🪄 IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE THE 3D, CHANGE YOUR 4D FIRST. CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVE TO HOW YOUR DESIRED SELF WOULD SEE THE WORLD. KEEP DWELLING IN IT. IF THE 3D SHOWS UNFAVORABLE CIRCUMSTANCES, DON'T FUCKING GET TRIGGERED. GO BACK TO YOUR IMAGINATION AND DENY YOUR SENSES.
🪄 EVERYTIME YOU SEE SOMETHING ELSE IN THE 3D, GO 'BRUHH THIS IS MY OLD STORY, I ALREADY HAVE WHAT I WANT, THIS IS JUST FAKE' AND MOVE ON. DISTRACT YOURSELF. CUS THE 3D WORLD WHICH YOU SEE IS AN ILLUSION, IT'S NOT REAL. IT'S YOUR CREATION, WHY WOULD YOU TRY TO CONTROL WHAT YOU CREATED? IT'S ALREADY IN CONTROL. YOU ONLY GOTTA REALISE YOUR GODSELF. YOU ARE THE CREATOR, NOT THE CREATION. STOP FUCKING VICTIMIZING YOURSELF.
🪄 I GET IT THAT MOST OF THE PEOPLE ARE CONFUSED BETWEEN LAW OF ASSUMPTION AND NON DUALISM. EVEN I WAS, BUT SLOWLY I REALISED THAT WE'RE ALL NOTHING. WE'RE JUST LIVING IN OUR OWN CREATIONS. VICTIMIZING OURSELVES IN OUR OWN CREATIONS. IRONIC RIGHT?
🪄 THOSE THOUGHTS, ANXIETY, FEELINGS, EMOTIONS ARE ALL IN YOUR PHYSICAL REALM. YOUR MIND, YOUR BODY, YOUR EGO EVERYTHING IS NO REAL, WE ASSUME IT TO BE. WE'RE ARE SHAPELESS, FORMLESS, WE'RE NOTHING! AND EVERYTHING AT THE SAME TIME. CUS EVERYTHING COMES DOWN TO ONE THING, I AM.
🪄 K Y'ALL MIGHT BE SUPER CONFUSED, WHAT I'M TRYNA INFUSE IN YOUR BRAINS. SO WHAT YOU DO IS, LIVE IN YOUR 4D.HOW? IMAGINATION. NO MATTER WHAT YOU SEE IN YOUR 3D, GO BACK TO YOUR IMAGINATION, AFFIRM OR VISUALISE. ANYTHING IS FINE BTW. JUST STAY IN THE STATE OF WISH FULFILLED.
🪄 STOP RELYING ON METHODS, FUCK THEM. JUST BE. DON'T TRY TO CHANGE SOMETHING WHEN YOU ALREADY HAVE THEM. JUST STOP, SURRENDER, STOP FIGHTING, STOP TRYING SO HARD WHEN YOUR ALREADY IT. SO GO LIVE IN YOUR IMAGINATION, FULLY SURRENDER. DO THINGS WHICH YOU LIKE. GO LIVE YOUR LIFE. TAKE YOUR POWER BACK.
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LIKE AREN'T YOU TIRED? TRAPPED IN YOUR OWN CREATIONS? YOU CREATED THEM, YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE WHATEVER. TELL ME HOW LONG ARE YOU GONNA LIVE THIS BULLSHIT LIFE? YOU'RE REALLY GETTING COMFORTABLE BEING UNCOMFORTABLE. SO LISTEN UP, DO WHAT YOU LOVE, AFFIRM, VISUALISE, OR DAYDREAM, ZONE OUT, WHATEVER. ALL I DID WAS DO THIS MEDITATION IN THE MORNING, WENT ABOUT MY DAY WATCHING JUJUTSU KAISEN LMAO. THEN RANDOMLY AFFIRM, LIVED IN MY 4D, NEVER PAYED ANY FUCKING ATTENTION TO MY 3D, CUS I'M GOD. I REALLY LOVE VISUALISING, SO I PUT ON A SONG AND START DAYDREAMING IN MY ROOM SMILING LIKE AN IDIOT. ALSO, I DID SATS BEFORE GOING TO BED. THAT'S IT. THAT'S ALL I DID FOR 3 FUCKING DAYS, AND GOT WHAT EVER I WANT. ALSO I MADE A CUSTOM TAPE TOO (IT'S A GENERAL SELF CONCEPT ONE) I LISTENED TO IT FOR 30 MINS AND JUST WENT ABOUT MY DAY THINKING I HAD WHATEVER I FUCKING DESIRE, CUS IT'S ALL MY CREATIONS AND I HAVE IT ALREADY. THERE'S NOTHING TO GET, IT'S ALREADY IN ME.
LUV YOU, BYE 💋
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midgardian-witch · 25 days ago
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The Lunar Effect
Steven finds out their System is actually an Omega and not a Beta like he thought this whole time. Marc is very sorry. And Jake is here for a good time and not a long time.
And you're along for the ride and happy to help your beloved Omegas.
AO3
tags: alpha/beta/omega | omegaverse | omegaverse - heat | Marc being self-deprecating | prostate massage | handjob | penetration (p in a) | omega!Moon Knight System | Alpha!Reader | gender-neutral Reader | Reader has a knot/penis | knotting
ships: Moon Knight System/Reader
word count: 6.3k
Part of Fran's Mini Kinktober 2024
AN: once again a big thanks to my beta reader @my-secret-shame for being a huge help and an amazing hype person 💙
tagging: @twwcs
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Lunar Effect: a purported correlation between specific stages of the roughly 29.5-day lunar cycle and behavior and physiological changes in living beings on Earth, including humans. 
Steven feels odd. Despite the cold London weather he can't bear to wear more than a light t-shirt and some loose pants. No matter what he does his temperature seems to climb and his mind feels foggy. He’s sure he is running a fever. 
He sends you a quick text, making sure you don't worry about him before calling in sick at work. Steven wasn't about to possibly spread whatever bug he caught. Instead he moves through his flat sluggishly, preparing something light to eat, careful not to upset his stomach. He thinks about taking a hot bath, to relax his aching muscles but just imagining stepping into a pool of steaming hot water while he already feels overheated has his mind spinning. He wishes you were here but he doesn't want you to get sick too. 
After a light breakfast Steven still doesn’t feel better and decides to go back to bed and rest some more. As he steps back into his bedroom he strips out of his clothes, the material starting to feel strangely itchy on his skin. Leaving his underwear on for some form of decency Steven crawls back into bed. The cool fabric of the bed sheets feel heavenly against his skin as he sinks into the plush mattress and it doesn’t take long for sleep to claim him once again. 
His dreams come in flashes. Bodies pressed together. Heated skin caressed and teased. Plump, reddened lips kissed and bitten. An aching feeling of emptiness. The sound of low moans.
His head is spinning, he feels too hot and his skin is slick with sweat as he wakes up from his less than ideal slumber. Steven doesn’t know how long he was asleep for but he feels even worse now than he did this morning. With a groan he pushes the blanket off of himself. His covers are drenched, the wet fabric clinging to his skin. His brain feels fuzzy like it’s wrapped in cotton. Sluggishly he sits up and throws his legs over the edge of the bed. Steven scrunches his brows together, his underwear soaked and sticking to his skin uncomfortably. What the hell was wrong with him? It doesn’t feel like sweat or any worse bodily fluid. It feels strangely slick, like nothing he has ever experienced before. Did he have some strange new disease? Was he going to sweat out ooze forever now? Was he going to melt like the Wicked Witch of the West? He can’t think straight, every movement is too much, he feels too hot but strangest of all he feels empty. 
“What is happening to me?” he whispers to himself, his voice shaking. To top off his already nerve-wracking state he is starting to panic now. He can feel his heart racing, his breath quickening. He can feel himself dissociate, his body stops to feel real. He wants to get out, to get away, to simply-
Steven? What’s going on, buddy? 
Marc. Oh god. Maybe he knows what’s going on.
“I-I don’t know. Everything is too hot and the blanket is too scratchy and why am I wet and-”
Calm down. What are you talking about- oh shit.
Oh shit? Oh shit?! He’s possibly melting because of some strange illness he’s contracted and all Marc has to say about it is ‘Oh shit’?! 
“Is that all you have to say about this? We might be dying and you-”
We are not dying, Steven. We are- well- uh…
“We are what? You know something!” He hates when Marc is being cagey. He thought they were through with keeping secrets but of course Marc couldn’t be straightforward, not even when they are dying-
Marc’s sigh pulls him out of his thoughts and what he says buries its way into his brain like a knife. 
We’re in heat. 
Time seems to freeze. He can’t comprehend what Marc is saying. They’re betas! They never had a Heat their whole life! Marc must be lying, it can’t be true, it doesn’t make any sense.
I am not lying. Why would I lie about that? Alright, just calm down. We can deal with this. 
With shaky legs Steven gets up from the bed, his knees nearly giving out under him. His hand trembles as he tentatively slides it down under his underwear between his ass cheeks. He’s soaked, slick slowly trickling out of his hole like a waterfall. Steven can’t stop the surprised moan that escapes him at the sudden, overwhelming pleasure that shoots through him as his fingers skim the rim of his asshole. 
Stop that. We need to keep a clear head for as long as we can. 
But Steven can't stop himself, his finger slowly breaching the rim and slowly sliding inside. It's like nothing he has ever felt before; his skin is burning and this feels like long awaited summer rain. His breath shudders as his finger plunges in and out. He needs more. He needs…
He needs.
Steven!
His hand flinches away and out of his underwear without his control. A pitiful whine bubbles up in his throat, grieving the loss. The feeling of emptiness feels so much worse now that he had a taste of this. Marc’s voice reaches him though this fog of pleasure and he swallows hard. He just has to focus on Marc’s voice and he’ll be alright. Just focus.
Take a deep breath. You got this, Steven. We got this. 
His breathing is shaky, air filling his lungs in short bursts. It takes a few minutes, although it feels longer, until Steven has calmed down somewhat. The ache is still there, this gnawing emptiness but as he focuses on his breathing it gets easier to handle. He’s on edge but Marc’s voice anchors him. 
“Alright, so what do we do now? How do we deal with this?” he asks, gesturing towards his nether regions. He’s not dumb. He knows how a Heat works in theory. But it’s a wholly different situation when it affects you directly. He can feel Marc squirm uncomfortably, unhappy with having to have this conversation. 
Well, we’re gonna need some supplies. I haven’t really stocked up on toys or anything. And we shouldn’t go out in this state.
Steven paces around, his shaky legs leading him aimlessly through his flat. He could just take care of it himself, right? People ride out their Heat without any toys or Alpha all the time, right? His whole body shudders at just the thought of an Alpha taking care of him. He hears Marc in the back of his mind urging him to focus as his gaze lands on his phone lighting up with a message. Steven picks up his phone and checks his texts. A familiar warmth spreads through his body, not the sudden arousal fueled by his heat but the joy knowing he is loved. The message is from you, sent right after he laid down for his nap, hoping for his swift recovery and asking if there is anything you could do for him, if he needed anything and if you should come over to ‘play nurse’. 
He wishes you were here even more now. You’d know what to do, he’s sure. You'd make sure he was comfortable in bed, fresh, cool sheets being the only thing to touch his heated skin. That and your hands of course. Oh stars, your hands would be so gentle, petting his head, caressing his body. You know just where to touch him to make him keen, to make him whine and babble and beg for more. You're the perfect partner. His partner. His Alpha. 
The realization hits him like a ton of bricks and Steven freezes, his phone falling from his hands and landing on the ground with a clatter. 
You're an Alpha. 
He never gave much thought to your secondary gender but now. 
All he has to do is call you and you would come to him. You'd take care of him and make this agonizing emptiness go away. Your lips on his, your hands on his clammy skin, your knot in his-
Don't even think about it, Steven. 
Marc's voice pulls him out of his day dreams just in time to feel another wave of slick dribbling out of his hole, ruining his underwear even further. 
“Why not? It's not like I am inviting a stranger to fuck me silly,” Steven countered. Marc groans in frustration. 
That's not the point and you know it.
“What are you afraid of, Marc? They are not going to love us any less just because we are an Omega!” Steven feels almost manic now that the thought of you spending his first Heat with him has formed in his mind. He needs it and not even Marc was going to stop him.
I know they won't but…
Marc hesitates. Steven hit the nail on the head. Their secondary gender was just another thing on the long list of things Marc thought would make you leave them one of these days. Steven can feel the worry, the self-loathing, the anxiety like ice water running through his veins.
“Marc, stop it. They love us. All of us,” he tries to reason, “This won’t change anything.” Marc bristles at his soft tone but Steven can feel him calm down nonetheless. “Now let me give them a call so they can fuck our brains out, yeah?” Counting Marc’s amused snort as a yes, Steven bends down, grabbing his phone from the floor. He hesitates only a short moment before he pulls up your contact, his thumb hovering over the green call button for only a second before pressing it.
You pick up at the second ring, not even giving him time to get nervous about what he was going to ask of you. “Hey baby,” you answer, a mix of excitement and worry in your voice, “How are you doing? Still feeling sick? Do you need something? Should I come over?” Just hearing your voice makes him feel lighter and he can't help but smile. “Feeling better now that I hear you, love.” He can hear you snort at the end of the line and it makes him giddy. “Alright if you're flirting with me you're definitely not dying,” you reply, laughter in your voice, “So what's up?” For a moment Steven completely forgot why he even called you until another wave of Heat hits him, slick dribbling from his hole as he stifles a moan. 
“Steven? Are you alright?” 
You sound so concerned, probably thinking he was in pain while all he felt was desperately horny. “I’m…oh stars…I need you. It's a lot to explain but-,” 
“No need to explain. I am on my way.” 
Our Alpha is coming to take care of us. Our Alpha will make sure we're safe. Our Alpha is going to f-
“Just stay put. The spare key is still under the mat, right?” 
He can hear rustling, probably you putting your shoes on. You’ll be here soon. Soon.
“Steven?”
He blinks, disoriented, his mind feeling even fuzzier than before. He hums in affirmation before a needy whine escapes his throat. “I’ll be there soon. Just try and relax until I’m there, alright? I love you.” His heart flutters while his hole pulses with need and he is so in love and so aroused that he can only reply with a whimper. 
Steven feels faint. He can hear the call disconnect but it sounds distant, like his phone is in another room and not right in his hand. He feels so alone. He just heard his Alpha but where are they? A distressed whimper reverberates from his throat and sweat starts to drip from his forehead.
They’ll be here soon.
Marc isn't as unaffected anymore. His words slur together but still he tries to calm Steven down.
Just lay down and wait for our Alpha. They'll take care of us. We just need to be good and wait.
Steven nods and shuffles back towards the bed. He can be good. He can wait. Their Alpha will be here soon. 
As soon as he lays back down he can feel the restlessness rise again. The last piece of clothing covering his heated skin feels suffocating, like a heavy rock tied to his body pulling him down to drown him. With shaking hands he tries to pull down his underwear but it's suddenly so much more difficult to coordinate his hands and hips. He struggles to get his underwear over his knees and take them off completely. Frustrated he gives up and lays back down with a defeated sob. His body is on fire; all he can think of is the need pulsing through his whole body, all he can hear is the pump of his heart pushing desire through his bloodstream like it's molten rock. 
Time distorts for Steven as he waits for you, his head filled with cotton, seconds stretching into what feels like eons. He doesn’t know how long it’s been since you talked on the phone when he suddenly feels something touch his forehead. Steven opens his eyes, not even remembering having closed them, and there you are, your hand pressed to his temple. “Oh baby,” you coo and your voice is the sweetest sound he has ever heard, “You’re burning up.” You’re here and you smell heavenly. More slick pools from his hole and he moans weakly at the feeling. Your nostrils flare for just a second and a soft growl escapes your throat. “Steven,” you gasp his name, “I could smell you as soon as I got into the flat. That's what you wanted to tell me on the phone, right?” Your hand pushed the sweat slick strands of hair out of his face. “You're in heat, aren't you?” A desperate keening fills the air as he chases your touch. He’s delirious, eyes glassy and pupils dilated and just the barest hint of your touch feels like water in an oasis. Steven nods hesitantly. 
“Don't worry, love. I’ll take care of you,” you tell him in a soothing tone, your hands gently running over his sweat-soaked skin, “We don't need to have sex either if you're uncomfortable with that.” Steven moans weakly, his words slurred as he's pushing his body against your hands, your fingers splayed out over his chest, “Please, need you.” You keep running your hands over his heated skin in soothing motions. “You have me, baby. I am right here.” Steven shakes his head violently. “Inside,” he clarifies. 
You're stunned for a second, uncertain if Steven was already too far gone and this was the Heat talking or if he really wanted you to fuck him through his Heat. It's not like it would be the first time you had sex but Heat was different. And yes, you had been together for quite some time but that didn't mean you were the one he would choose for his time of the month. 
Which reminds you that you really had to talk about why he never told you he was an Omega. It would not have been a deal breaker of course! This was Steven! And Marc! And Jake! You don't care about their secondary gender because they are them and you love them. But it would have been a nice heads up; you could have prepared better, helped faster if you had known.
“Alpha, please.”
His agonized whine pulls you from your anxious spiral and you blink at Steven. “Say that again,” you mumble.
“Alpha…,” he gasps, his hands slowly reaching for yours, “Please fuck me.”
You take a breath you didn't even realize you were holding, the tantalizing aroma of his arousal cloying the back of your throat and making your head spin. He grabs your wrists, frantically trying to maneuver your hands to where he needs them: everywhere. Desperate pleads spill from his mouth as he lets you explore his body anew. His skin is hot under your fingers, almost feverish. “What do you want, baby? My fingers? My knot?” you ask softly as your hands wander up towards his chest, giving his pecs a gentle squeeze. The responding gasp makes your lips curl into a smirk. Steven has always been more sensitive than the others but the Heat would have dialed that up tenfold. “I need to hear you say it, love, or I won’t touch you,” you explain as you carefully remove your hands so that they are hovering just over his chest, teasingly. 
He whines again in frustration, “Please. Anything!” You pinch his left nipple and he yelps, his body almost lifting off of the bed. “That’s not an answer to my question, Omega,” you purr, a wicked smile gracing your lips, “Do you need my fingers in your pretty little hole or do you want my knot?” 
He stares up at you, mouth agape, when his body shifts slightly. His eyes go vacant for a moment until a string of Spanish curses fall from his lips, his hips bucking into the air, eager for any type of friction. You bite your lips, trying to stifle your laughter. “Hello there Jake. Are you aware of what you just switched into?” you ask in a teasing tone, still trying to suppress your grin. He groans in response, “Alpha, if you don't fuck us right this second I will-”, his sentence is cut short by your fingers exploring his backside. 
“You’ll what? Fuck yourself on your own fingers begging for my knot because you know they won't be big enough to satisfy you?” A desperate sob falls from his lips and you don't know which one of them is at the front when he clenches around the finger pushing slowly into his slick hole. There is barely any resistance as you add another finger, curling them a little bit in search of his prostate. “Mierda,” Jake shouts as your fingers find the spot you were looking for, lightning shooting up his spine. 
“There we go,” you purr, continuously rubbing that spot inside of him that has him cursing and begging and has his limbs flailing. His cock is an angry red, standing at attention and begging to be touched. And yet you seem eager to ignore it, your sole focus on massaging his prostate. “Think you can come like this, baby? Come on your Alpha’s fingers?” Between the litany of moans he barely gets out a yes, his head thrown back against the pillow. His whole body is shaking more and more with every curl of your fingers, every slide against his prostate. You watch him writhe under your ministrations, pre-cum dribbling down his length. His body is wound tight as he approaches his peak steadily. As you sense that he is right on the edge you use your other hand to hold his balls, gently rolling them between your fingers. You can feel them tighten in your grasp as he bucks up, cum spurting from his cock like a fountain, his walls squeezing your fingers rhythmically. You let him grind against your hands, riding out his first orgasm of his Heat.
“Good boy. My beautiful Omega. That should take the edge off for at least a bit, hm?” you coo as you gently slip your fingers out of his hole, coated in his slick. “Damn, you're practically leaking, baby.” A drawn out groan is the only response you get. You clean off your hands on the already stained sheets, shaking your head in amusement. You feel honored to help your boyfriends through their Heat but you weren't going to just not tease them.
“My legs feel like jello,” he mumbles and the accent trips you up. You look over to your boyfriend, his chest heaving with every breath. “You ok, Marc?” He simply nods and tries to sit up, his face scrunched up in disgust. “The sheets are wet,” he grumbles, irritated. You snort a laugh and shake your head in amusement. “That's what happens when you keep leaking slick like a pornstar,” you reply with a grin. He looks at you, eyes still hazy but he seems more coherent than Steven and Jake were before. “Sorry about that,” he murmurs, avoiding eye contact. 
“Sorry about what?” You have no idea what he could be apologizing for. He still looks away from you when you sit down on the edge of the bed next to him. You give him time to ruminate in his thoughts before he finally answers. “I’m sure you had better plans than taking care of an Omega in Heat.” 
A long sigh escapes you before you place a hand on his knee, trying to gain his attention. It somehow works, his eyes focused on the way your fingers draw lazy circles over his skin. "Whether or not I had plans doesn't really matter. I will always be there when you need me, Marc.” His muscles tense under your touch and he averts his gaze once again. “We can talk about why you didn't tell me you're an Omega to begin with. Not because I need an explanation but because I think we should talk about why you thought hiding it was the best choice here,” you keep your voice soft and lean down to place a featherlight kiss to his thigh, right over where your hand is still stroking him soothingly, “But for now: just let me take care of you. Will you let me?”
Marc gasps as your lips press against his skin, heat rising to his cheeks. He nods quickly, unable to fight you even on a good day, but especially while in Heat. With a little smirk you place more kisses along his thigh, stomach and chest until you are face to face. “Thank you, my beautiful Omega,” you croon with your hand now on his jaw, turning his head towards you. His pupils are blown as your eyes meet, a soft whine falling from his lips. “Fuck, you can't just say shit like this,” he curses, sounding out of breath like he just ran a marathon. The grin on your face spreads wider and you place a final kiss to his mouth. Marc eagerly chases your lips with his, the soft kiss turning into something needy and messy. You only break the kiss when you get light-headed, your body desperate for oxygen. 
Breathing deeply you look down towards your boyfriend whose eyes have returned to their heat-induced glassy state. Usually the time between Heat waves would be longer, at least according to your biology courses back in school. Something else to discuss with Marc later. But for now your first priority was to keep your boyfriend satisfied. 
“My poor Omega,” you coo as you take a peek down his body, his cock standing back at attention, begging for release, “Let me help you with that.” You reach down, your hand grasping his weeping cock while your lips pepper his throat and chest with more teasing kisses. In languid strokes you move your hand up and down his shaft. His cock is twitching violently under your ministrations, an easy tell that this won't be a very long handjob. Sweet words whispered into the crook of his neck have him cursing and begging. 
“Alpha, please, ‘m so close-”
“So good for me, my perfect Omega. Just let go. Come for me.”
As if on command Marc groans loudly, his hips bucking into your hand as he achieves his climax, another stream of cum spurting from his cock. You stroke him through the aftershocks until the stimulation gets too much for him. The dirty sheets get once again misused as a towel and you clean his semen from your hand. 
Marc's head lulls to the side as he watches you, bleary-eyed. “Why the fuck are you still dressed?” he mumbles half into the pillow. You freeze for a moment before you burst into laughter. With all of this going on, getting naked hadn’t occurred to you at all, your sole priority being the well-being of your Omega. But now that Marc had mentioned it, you being overdressed for the occasion was not the only thing you noticed. You could feel the tightness of your underwear, the way your body was ready to give your Omega exactly what he needed, what biology dictated he was supposed to need. But alas neither Jake nor Marc had declared any preference for getting knotted by you. So you would use everything else at your disposal to make their Heat run smoothly.
“Does it bother you?” you ask genuinely. Marc blinks at you for a moment, his thoughts slower post-orgasm. “Not bother but- I need- I want-...,” he rambles, his brows furrowing as he gets more frustrated with himself. 
“It's alright, baby. You don't have to explain.” You get up, quickly and methodically removing your clothes and putting them to the side. As you turn back towards him you notice his eyes trailing down your body hungrily, resting right between your legs at the sign of your own arousal. It's nothing he hadn't seen before but for some reason this seems different. Maybe it's the realization sinking in that this is the first time you are together like this not just as romantic partners but as Alpha and Omega. In any case you feel a little bashful as his eyes roam your body like you're some Greek statue come to life - in awe and slightly horny.
“Better?”
He licks his lips and nods shortly. You smile, reassured, and sit back down next to him. You reach over to pet his head, your fingers burying into his sweat-soaked curls when you notice how he is very pointedly staring at your crotch. He doesn't seem disappointed. “Like what you see?” you ask with a cheeky grin. Another nod but still no words. “Talk to me, baby.”
He blinks quickly, his jaw going slack and eyes wide. His eyes refocus on the sight of your arousal and he nearly starts drooling. You feel him shift under you as another wave of the scent of his slick permeates the air. “Alpha,” he whines, the switch in accent distinct, “Need your knot, please.” 
“You want me to knot you, Steven? You sure?” You don't mean to sound like a tease, your question being genuine, but with Steven like this you can't help yourself. The way he whines and begs for you is too sweet not to savor. He rubs his head against your hand, like a cat eager to be petted, and nods. “Need it so bad. Need your knot inside,” he begs, pressing his body against yours as much as is possible for him, “Fill me up, please.” 
“Since you’re asking so nicely,” you coo. You cup his face in your hands, gently rubbing your thumb against his cheeks as he looks up at you with hope in his eyes. “Think you can get on your hands and knees?” He swallows hard, his face set in determination. You watch him wiggle on the mattress for a moment, trying and failing hard to move but his body is too weak from the strain the Heat is putting on him (and probably the two orgasms you’ve teased out of it). Steven sinks back down into the sheets with an annoyed huff before he shakes his head in disappointment. “Don’t worry,” you murmur, “This way I can watch your face while I fuck you. And kiss you while my knot is deep inside of you, filling you up to the brim with my cum.” 
You slowly crawl on top of him, spreading his legs so you can fit between them comfortably. “And you’ll be my good little Omega and take everything I give you, won’t you?” Steven keens as your fingers once again find his entrance, pushing into the slick hole and finding no resistance. “Yes. Everything. Everything.” He’s babbling, mindlessly grinding his hips against your fingers. You know it’s not enough for him, not anymore. He needs something much bigger than your fingers and you’re more than happy to oblige, arousal curling hot inside your belly, your cock throbbing between your legs. 
You remove your fingers, wiping them on his belly, and grasp the base of your cock, guiding it towards his hole. Steven is squirming under you, too aroused and feverish to think clearly, his body moving on autopilot. As you slowly enter him he raises his hips to meet your movements. With every inch of you pushing inside, his moans get louder, his babbling becoming more incoherent. Even though his sentences turn more and more into broken words and whimpers you know exactly what he wants, your body moving on instinct, eager to make your Omega see stars. With a few more thrusts you bury yourself to the hilt inside him. 
You stay like this for a moment, holding onto Steven’s hips to keep steady. He squirms under you, eager for you to move, to finally thrust into him and make him see stars. “Needy Omega,” you tut with a grin before you give him a sudden, hard thrust that leaves him choking on air. You slowly develop a rhythm that works for the both of you. With the slow roll of your hips you pump into him deeply, the tip of your cock rubbing deliciously against his prostate with every thrust. The feeling of his wet heat surrounding your cock is divine and you are quick to realize that you have not been left unaffected by their Heat. A possessive growl reverberates from your throat as you watch Steven lose himself under you, a gasping, sweaty mess. 
“My Omega,” you groan as you lift his hips for a better angle, “My sweet, perfect Omega; taking me so well.” You lean forward, placing open mouthed kisses to his nipples, chest and neck, your thrusts slowing down, but reaching much deeper than before. He’s panting, choking on his moans as your lips and tongue explore his skin. “So good for me, “ you whisper into his ear before you nibble on his earlobe, “Like you were made to take my cock.” He nods eagerly, his moans only getting louder when you drag your teeth over his throat. You nibble at the soft skin before sucking on it harshly. The noises spilling from Steven’s mouth will have the neighbors clutch their pearls, you’re sure, but you have never heard a more arousing sound. Once you’re satisfied with the lovebite on his throat you soothe the bruise with your tongue. “My Omega,” you purr possessively. Steven shudders against you, his body burning for you. “Yours. Yours,” he agrees weakly, his voice hoarse from his wanton cries. 
You reposition yourself, your cock aching for release, and snap your hips forward, picking up a faster rhythm. His body jolts with the movement as you fuck him into the mattress. “Close,” he pants over the slap of skin against skin, “So close.” You grunt in agreement, throwing one of his legs over your shoulder and lifting his hips even higher. With deep, hard strokes you pump into him, his walls clenching around you. Your cock pulses inside his velvety heat, sweat dripping from your brow as you plow into him with no abandon. Pleasure shoots down your spine like lightning and you can barely groan out a warning as you reach your climax. Your knot expands, filling Steven while you pump your cum into him. The sheer width of it, the feeling of being filled so completely, to be connected to you in this way, pushes him over the edge, his own cock pulsing violently, cum spurting over his stomach. 
Before your knees have time to give up under you, you gently roll down next to Steven, taking him with you. It takes a moment until the two of you can find a comfortable position, while you are connected like this but you end up resting on the side, your legs a tangled mess and your arms wrapped around each other. You’re sweaty, exhausted and completely blissed out. Your foreheads touch, your breath mingling with his as you bask in the afterglow of your climax and the soft, buzzing pleasure of your knot tying your boyfriend to you, at least for a short while. Steven nuzzles into the crook of your neck, breathing in your soothing scent. “That was amazing,” he breathes out, disbelieving almost, “Never thought it would feel like this.” You huff out a soft laugh, “Glad I could make your first Heat good then.” Steven leans back and looks at you deadpan. “Good? Good? I’m pretty sure I won’t be able to walk anymore, love. That’s more than just good,” he huffs, almost offended by you selling yourself short like this. You grin and shake your head. “‘Great’ then?” Steven nods his head with a pleased smirk and leans his head back against your collarbone. 
You stay like this for as long as it takes for your knot to go down again. As you pull out, a gush of cum leaking out of his hole, Steven makes a grimace, the feeling surely unpleasant for him. You mumble a quick apology and try to sit up but Steven pulls you back into his embrace. “Didn’t say you could just get up, did I?” he quips, a cheeky grin on his face. Well, if he can already sass you again, their Heat couldn’t be that bad anymore. Your brows furrow as you think about their Heat, your mind a bit clearer now too after your own climax. 
“Steven, did you know you guys are an Omega?”
With an annoyed look in his eyes he responds: “I sure as shit didn’t. Because somebody had to have secrets again!”
“Yeah I had planned on asking Marc about that. Just wanted to know if it was a collective decision not to tell me about your secondary gender or if- well- you know,” you wave in the direction of Steven’s head, indicating their DID, “Secrets and all that.” Steven nods in understanding. His gaze grows distant for a moment and you figure that he was probably yelling at Marc in their headspace. 
You’re sure Marc had his reasons for the secrecy but it still felt like an odd decision. Wouldn’t Jake and Steven have noticed going into Heat before or would that memory just have been locked behind their DID-version of a paywall? 
Your musings are interrupted by an annoyed groan. Steven looks clearly miffed as he rolls his eyes and looks back to you. “You know what? I think you should have that talk with Marc now.” You blink at him, taken aback by the sudden proposition but before you can reply his body shifts next to you, muscles tensing up, his brows furrowing and jaw growing tight. 
With an exasperated huff Marc rubs his face in annoyance. “Alright, alright, I got it, Steven. Stop lecturing. I know,” he grumbles. He takes a deep breath before he looks at you with a sheepish smile. “Hey baby,” he mumbles, already looking plenty chastised without you having said anything. Steven’s work, no doubt. “Hey Marc, you feeling ok?” 
He nods briefly. “Yeah, thanks to you. I’m sorry, again, for all of this.” His shoulders sink and you know that he is blaming himself for what happened. 
“I don’t want an apology, Marc. I want to understand.” 
He sighs and nods again. “Alright, yeah. I can explain.”
You listen to him intently. He tells you all about his time in the army, his time as a mercenary, and the inherent danger of simply having your Heat in that line of work. When you can’t just take time off for your Heat because you work in Alpha-dominated fields like that, there is not much one can do other than take Heat suppressants. And when he became Khonshu’s Fist Of Vengeance it wasn’t much different. He still took the suppressants and when he needed to have a Heat, per the medication’s specifications, he made sure to time it for when Steven wouldn’t be busy with work or other things. But with Steven and Jake becoming a more present part of his life he simply forgot to inform them until it was too late. Until now. 
“I should have told them right away but I kept thinking that there would be a better time for it and then,” he stops himself with a huff and motions towards his body, “Then this happened. And I’m sorry. I really am.” You have the feeling there is more to this but decide that subject can wait for another time, a time after their Heat.
You reach over and squeeze his shoulder. “I know, baby. And I am sure Steven and Jake know that too,” you respond softly before your lips curl into a smirk, “You will have to survive their teasing for a while. That seems fair though, doesn’t it?” 
He rolls his eyes, but you can see him fighting a grin of his own. “I suppose I will have to,” he replies, leaning his head against your collarbone, just like Steven had done earlier, “Now that I have a big, strong Alpha to protect me from Jake’s jokes and Steven’s sass.” You snort, unable to control your laughter. “Your big, strong Alpha needs a fucking nap now,” you counter with a grin, “I’ll need my strength. Your Heat isn’t over yet after all.” Marc shudders at the realization and you’re sure he’s starting to produce slick again. 
“So let’s rest. And after that I’ll fuck you again and again for as long as you need me to, my gorgeous Omega.”
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puttersmile · 2 months ago
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Why I like Dogday x Bobby Bearhug
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Working off of my last Crittertember post, posting the shipping manifesto for the four of you who are just dying to know, lol.
Part 1 of Post: Here. Just a lot of pictures.
I guess I should start with how I started liking the ship in the first place. As best as I can remember it started with a mildly intense obsession with the Smiling Critters after seeing them in Poppy Playtime Chapter 3. Their carboard soundboards specifically intrigued me. As a fandom we really had ziltch to work with so maybe I was hyper-analyzing their phrases to see if anything could be gleamed from them.
There isn't much unless we are meant to believe Picky is literally a cannibal. I don't think so? I think the voice lines have been corrupted by the metric ton of death that happened within the factory. Be it as it may, what little we fanon-ize about the critters, a lot of it is probably coming from those soundboards.
A post about this already exists on tumblr but at some random point I thought, "Weird Bobby Bearhug and Dogday's cut outs sound like they are talking to one another." Not sure how my brain jumped to that conclusion but it did. As seen in this post with some old oogly art I drew.
And then @meowcola made my dream come true by editing the two voices together. Yhaass! For this I am forever grateful to my fellow shipper.
I don't think any of the other critter's voice lines bounce off of each other as well as these two do (admittedly with slight editing), or even at all. But Bobby and Dogday's cutouts almost seem to have a conversation that don't work played against any of the others. Dogday trying to push someone away that he cares for and Bobby desperately trying to stay with someone she cares for.
Dogday's fall is he cares too much.
Bobby's fall is she doesn't care enough. For herself.
Obviously they are talking to the player actually but my fanon ship brain interpreted it differently. I guess from there, albeit a doomed one, I shipped this ship fairly hard.
The rest of this rambling essay under the cut:
Why I think they work:
Dogday and Bobby’s relationship is mostly about balance. While Dogday’s the brave and daring leader of the group (except when there's a thunderstorm—he tries), Bobby’s the physically strong yet practical one. She’s a total powerhouse,(literal mama bear energy) ready to protect when needed, but only as a last resort. Dogday loves how protective she is, and Bobby really appreciates his loyalty, especially since it helps with her self-worth issues.
One of Bobby’s biggest insecurities is that she believes she’s annoying to her friends. Even though it’s clear she’s not, in the back of her mind, she constantly second-guesses her actions. She’ll wonder if hugging someone is the right move in the moment or if she’s overstepping. Dogday, on the other hand, is someone who thrives on affection and would never get tired of Bobby’s hugs, making him the perfect counter to her uncertainty.
Both of them would share a strong sense of humor, which helps them face life’s challenges with optimism. Dogday is especially good at this.  They know how to lighten the mood and bring joy to each other’s lives, even when the weight of everything starts to creep in.
Bobby’s also got a knack for stepping in when Dogday forgets to take care of himself. She’s nurturing, and in return, Dogday reminds her she’s worth it, which she sometimes forgets. Though Bobby’s not Dogday’s second-in-command (that’s usually Bubba Bubbaphant), she’s the one Dogday confides in emotionally when leadership wears him down.
Over time, Bobby finds herself leaning on Dogday, too, sharing her deepest insecurities and struggles with him.
What really makes them work is how much everyone trusts Bobby. She’s the keeper of everyone’s secrets because they just naturally open up to her. And eventually, Dogday becomes her rock, giving them this deep emotional connection where they’re both vulnerable and open with each other.
Bobby’s practicality also helps balance out Dogday’s crazier ideas. She rarely says “no” outright, but she’s good at restructuring them to make things safer or less chaotic. If safety’s not the issue, then they’re often the ones mediating when their friends have disagreements. They’ve both learned the importance of compromise and work together to bring peace to any tense situation.
I feel like their brief character descriptions show how good they would both be at this.
They’re known as the “mom and dad” of the group, always looking out for everyone’s physical and emotional well-being.
It’s funny how differently they approach things, like planning events—Dogday’s spontaneous energy versus Bobby’s structured organization—but they still make a great team.
In public, they’ve got this super cute Barbie/Ken - Mickey&Minnie vibe, showing their love for each other without hesitation. It’s strong, proud, and they never shy away from letting everyone know how much they mean to each other!
Character flaws/dark side of the ship:
At their darkest, Bobby and Dogday have some pretty complex flaws. Bobby, when she’s at her worst, can be manipulative. She’s got this way of playing on people’s emotions, sometimes twisting things to suit her needs, all while wearing a caring face. It’s like she knows people trust her and she uses that to her advantage, especially if she’s feeling insecure or threatened.
On the flip side, Dogday’s biggest weakness is his fear of hurting others. He��ll go to great lengths to avoid conflict, even if it means letting himself be hurt. He’s so afraid of causing pain or upsetting someone that he’ll bottle up his own feelings or allow himself to be taken advantage of.
This combination can be dangerous when their issues align, with Bobby’s manipulation and Dogday’s passive acceptance creating a pretty toxic dynamic in their worst moments. Thankfully this outcome is incredibly hard for me to see happening. It is still a possibility though.
(In some messed up but interesting fanfiction)
Other Stuff:
On the wiki I saw something incredibly minute but decided to go ahead and make something of it.  There is the idea, at least, that Dogday is named after “Dogstar” aka Sirius, the brightest star in the night sky. If you think about Dogday being associated with Sirius, the Dog Star, and Bobby representing Ursa Major aka The Big Dipper, in my mind it symbolizes how their relationship works.
Sirius is the brightest star, leading the way, just like Dogday, who's bold, full of energy, and always guiding others. Bobby, on the other hand, is like Ursa Major—steady, reliable, and always there to support.
Their relationship reflects that balance: Dogday’s light and leadership are complemented by Bobby’s protective, grounding nature. Together, they’re like two guiding forces—he lights the way, and she provides the strength and stability needed to stay on course.
It’s almost like he can shine brighter because he knows she’s there, holding things together.
And for Bobby, Dogday is the spark that keeps her moving forward, even when she feels uncertain.
It’s also cool how Ursa Major is used for navigation, like Bobby helps Dogday find his way emotionally. Meanwhile, Sirius has been a marker of important times like the "dog days" of summer or the flooding of the Nile river, (The flooding of the Nile is celebrated btw, it's a good thing) just as Dogday marks big changes in Bobby’s life.
They balance each other out like the constellations they represent: one a guiding light, the other a steady, protective force in the background.
I think about the cardboard cutout order. Bobby and Dogday are among the last supposedly, holding out even longer than the athletic Hoppy. I interpret that to mean Bobby on her own has a strong will and some amount of bravery.
Not to throw shade at the others who fell before, as it could have all come down to bad luck.(or bad platforming skills--burn.)  But I bring the “possible” death order up as some might say Bobby’s sweet and caring nature means she is weak or useless. I don’t think so.
This is also why I characterize Bobby as sort of a lady-like yet cute bruiser. Dogday is brave but not the strongest critter by far.  Dogday is  Zelda and Bobby is Link lol.  Bobby Bearhug is his knight in fluffy armor, and Dogday is Bobby’s warm home.
There is a tragedy to this. If Bobby was one of the last two  with Dogday in the game. (Going by the order the cardboard cutouts are seen.) I imagine she was doing her best to support him, only for Dogday to abandon Bobby near the end. As the leader, Dogday did what he thought was best and it broke her, ultimately ending them both.
How the relationship Helps them grow:
Not wanting to end this on a down note I’ll speak a bit more on how the relationship enhances both of them.
Bobby’s practical, more thoughtful approach doesn’t just temper Dogday’s adventurous spirit as what may be expected from a dynamic like this. In fact it enhances his daring. 
Yes, it'll ease him off riskier behavior but it enables him to be a more successful leader with her providing safety nets and or foundations for him to be confident. It's not just him willing confidence from within, there's another external pillar to  bolster his confidence. That pillar being her secret knowledge of their friends. While Bobby won't be spilling secrets, she'd certainly know how to guide Dogday in the right direction when it comes to helping the others.
She helps ensure that his ideas are successful and safe, so he'll not only be able to focus his energy on particulars but he'll have the confidence to be the best leader he can be, knowing he won't just come crashing down to earth.  
In turn Dogday's boundless energy, brings joy and spontaneity to Bobby’s more grounded maybe reserved, structured world.  Though she is strong she likely tends to fall back to what's familiar, to what's safe. There is strength in the familiar in the sense of you know for sure you are strong here, but out there things may be more uncertain. 
Out there you can feel weak. At least that's the perception for some with issues of self worth. But now with his energy, his enthusiasm, his optimism, and his light, she'll have the freedom to step out of her usual comfort zones and perhaps be more than she may have imagined. 
Sooo yeah. This ship is not bad. Nor is it boring. I'll never understand how this sentiment came about. Opposites attract isn't the only way a relationship can be interesting. Okay people?
 And that is all that I have to say! Thanks for listening to my CritterTalk.
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caligvlasaqvarivm · 9 months ago
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You might’ve already got this before, and I’m asking this in genuinely good faith.
Your essay was very interesting, and convinced me of Erikar as a ship reading. I also really enjoyed your dissection of Eridan as a very honest person drawn into destructive behavior. It very much lines up with his status as a Prince of Hope! One who destroys conviction/belief through conviction/belief.
What confused me was your insistence on the hidden hand of the author. Death of the Author and all that, what’s implied in the text can be taken on its own separate from commentary but you seem to be doing an autopsy— the text implies [this] so *Hussie* must have intended for [this] and then tried to cover it up. If they genuinely thought it was a better ending, why not do it? Why the secrecy, why the feints? I think it’s a little conspiracy-brained to insist on a secret “better ending” that we don’t have author’s word or drafts on.
I’m also a little drifted on your frustration with the deaths of the trolls? You write that the theme of Homestuck— a standard coming-of-age story, a reckoning with society and the exit from youth— is undercut by the deaths of the trolls, because that means they *had* to die, in *punishment*. I disagree. Their deaths are tragic, not just.
Homestuck has a lot of methods of revival, the choice to (for the most part) perma-kill some characters (the trolls for one, and then AR, WQ, and WK) is a deliberate choice to make death mean something. If dying doesn’t mean anything, what are the narrative stakes? Murderstuck marks Gamzee as a threat, Eridan as a tragedy. The deaths there are meant. To be sad. To demonstrate that sometimes kids don’t get to grow up, that sometimes the society they live in cuts them down.
Homestuck is a sad story at times! It doesn’t need an ending where everyone gets to live to keep its coming-of-age conclusion.
I hope this made sense. I’m not trying to attack you, I’m just skeptical of some of your points. I hope you go on to do more analysis in the future!
If you want to believe that, go ahead 👍 again, arguing my points on that front would require its own entire essay, lol, so I'm not really planning to do that as the answer to an ask. The only thing I really want to say here is that while Homestuck is often sad, as you say, its underlying tone is unwaveringly hopeful right up until Game Over/the Retcon, and even kind of beyond that. If you prefer a sad story, then you can have a sad story, but it's just not a reading consistent (to me) with the entire rest of what Homestuck is.
For example, the whole narrative grapples with the debate of predestination vs. free will. Do things happen in Homestuck because they have to, or because characters are making choices? But with the introduction of John's retcon powers, it lands firmly in the "free will" side of the debate: the retcon powers outright defy the power of stable time loops - a reflection of how Breath is associated with freedom and choice. This is the optimistic option.
Another thing the narrative grapples with is the realness vs. fakeness of magic. I don't think it's hard to argue that between LE's "evil wizard" status and Godtier!Calliope's wand-induced black hole that the arrow falls firmly in the realm of magic being undeniably real. This is the optimistic option (and yet another narrative element that Eridan is extremely relevant to).
Moreover, even post-Retcon, there are elements that are kept that soften the tragedy already present in the story - for example, the concept of the Ultimate Self, and the implication that all surviving characters will eventually achieve it, takes the edge off all their doomed and dead counterparts, who won't actually be relegated to double death in the dream bubbles, since in a way, they'll live on through their alpha counterparts. It turns those sacrifices from bitter to bittersweet, and serves as a counterpoint to common takes like John being sad that he doesn't know the version of his friends that exist post-Retcon. The inclusion of it in the post-Retcon story, even with its botched delivery, says to me that Homestuck is still intended to be optimistic at its core, even with the extreme Giving Up that Hussie did.
And let's not forget how Calliope gets to come back to life, no strings attached, and that her stated purpose is only to live. Up to the end, the tone is that of HOPE, and I think there's no mistake that HOPE is supposed to be what defeats LE.
As I said in replies on that post, as an artist, I just can't imagine spending literal years, and literally a million words and thousands of images, writing something that's so thematically and tonally consistent, only to hard swerve right at the end, without extenuating circumstances.
And the thing is, there WERE extenuating circumstances, and they're fairly well-documented.
The kickstarter got funded, and while the story is muddled, we know the production of the game was extremely troubled, and Hussie was having difficulty being a project lead for that while also grappling with everything else. Everything else being, of course, an ever-increasing number of irons in the fire - more third-party artists he had to commission and manage, more merchandise he had to be on top of, bigger updates to sate the demands of the fanbase.
Which, speaking of, was infamously one of the most awful and toxic fanbases to ever exist, and one that Hussie has deliberately attempted to distance himself from since. I can't imagine the kind of daily abuse, harassment, callouts, and worse that Hussie had to endure as Homestuck's creator during the fandom's peak years. I don't blame him at all for turning against them.
Therefore, given the way the tone and themes hard swerve, the way several characters get bent entirely out of shape (you're telling me Karkat had several means before him of bringing his dead friends back and WOULDN'T SAY ANYTHING???), the way several plot threads are simply left dangling in the air, and the way some characters reach really weird and unpleasant conclusions (davepeta, gcatavrosprite), I think it's actually LESS reasonable to assume that the ending we got was the original plan. Hussie saw that to do the ending he wanted to do back in act 4, he'd need to write for a year, maybe two years more, and then looked at his mounting stress and pressure, and looked at the fanbase he'd come to hate, and just went "nope." And I can't even really blame him for it, lol. In his position I'd probably do the same.
Also, please don't mistake "the deaths are undone" for "the deaths will not have mattered" - I think there's a reason that the game over timeline characters still exist post-Retcon. Their arcs don't end with their deaths, and their failures are weights on them that must be narratively resolved - I believe that they go on to be the ones to defeat LE, although I have much less evidence to support this. It just makes narrative sense to me - the post-retcon team focuses down the Felt, various Jack Noirs, and the Condesce - the latter of which is their final boss, as the ultimate representation of the shitty society they're doing away with on their path to creating a new one.
Meanwhile, the dead and "irrelevant" versions of the characters, the ones who grappled with and were harmed the most by what LE represents - immaturity, selfishness, and cruelty - go on to band together after death, and defeat him in the bubbles, a culmination of their vengeance for the havoc he wreaked. And with him being destroyed in the bubbles by the dead and irrelevant, symbolically, he will be rendered nothing more than a bad dream for the waking, relevant, and alive.
Thus Gamzee is still an antagonist, although it becomes (Gamzee) and (Equius) who go on to form LE. Those deaths and those failures still matter, they still happen, they still have narrative weight. Even without the Game Over versions of the characters still existing and still being important, the decision to welcome antagonists like Gamzee and Eridan back into the fold is rendered more complex and more significant BECAUSE we've seen how badly they can go.
The speech originally given by post-Retcon Vriska to (Vriska) is also, to me, a weird artifact of this hypothetical original ending - as it exists within the actual comic, it's said by the wrong person to the wrong person - Vriska with her character development reset to a (Vriska) who's had her characterization destroyed in order to make the first Vriska seem more right. I think originally, it would've come from (Karkat) to Meenah, the latter of which being the one whose idea it was to fuck off with the treasure, and who caused the Beforus team's worst problems, and who has a track record of fucking off whenever she's tasked with taking responsibility. Thus, it would serve as a conclusion to Meenah and Karkat's arc, as well as Game Over Sadkat's arc specifically, would convince Vriska to go with him, and would give Meenah some narrative commeuppance, which would kickstart some sort of Beforan troll feelings jam that would rally them together to actually be useful for once in their lives/afterlives and contribute to the LE fight.
Again, if you PREFER the sad ending, I can't stop you, but the reason I'm going in on there being an "original ending" that isn't sad is because the sad ending doesn't make narrative sense. Why is the ultimate self speech coming from a combination of two characters that barely spoke? Why is it triumphant that Meenah and character-development-reset Vriska get to be the big goods in the fight with LE? Why do multiple prophecies suddenly get dropped right at the end when all other prophecies DO come true? Why does Karkat spend so long being sad his friends are dead, and also why is he deliberately set up as the Friends Troll (blood = bonds), and then suddenly not care that multiple methods exist for bringing back his friends? Why bother softening the blow of all the dead/irrelevant alternate selves if they're intended to be fully tragic? Why introduce a mechanic that would let them save whoever they want consequence-free and then not use it to do that? Why does Roxy love wizards so much and then not get to meet the wizard boy? Why is the entire rest of Homestuck so carefully crafted, so narratively satisfying, so thematically and tonally consistent, and then all of it goes to shit right at the end?
So yeah lol this is the SHORT version lol this isnt even the LONG version of this essay
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nozunhinged · 11 months ago
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7 BL Newbie Moments of 2023 That Altered My Brain Chemistry
So I went through all my posts since the beginning of this journey and as much as I love dumping my insanity here without context or any punctuation, I feel that a lot of my fav moments deserve a bit more love and structure.
But first I need to put a bit of context so you won't be like "who the hell do they think they are" (aside from delusional I'm nothing, I promise) and my anxious overexplainer-heart is silenced.
My first BL TV show was Only Friends and only 5 months later I'm already throat deep into it (sorry). My watchlist is so endless that I sometimes (no, regularly) genuinely fear for my sanity. I'm still learning all the names and production houses but does that stop me from starting 10 other shows? NOPE.
I'm not new to queer fan spaces (avid manga reader since the yaoi days, my first ship was taito from digimon) but I am most definitely new to the brainrot levels these shows gave me.
And believe it or not, even though my shipper heart is over a decade old, I'm new to Tumblr and the fuel this platform added to the fire could burn down entire continents.
ANYWAYS if you're still here — please enjoy Noz's 100% self-indulgent moments!
1. The End And The Beginning - Only Friends
All I did was mindlessly scroll through the tumblr trends, no idea about how this website works, still sour and sad about the loss of my twitter bubble thanks to the elopocalypse—little did I know that fate would lead me to the wonderful world of BL shows! It was like this moment in isekai-esque movies where you get sucked into a world and you go WOOAAH once you arrive.
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There was this show—on YouTube—100% unapolagetic about sex, relationships and queerness. Five minutes into the first episode, someone asks if they can bring their boyfriend to a hookup. This was ALL of my wildest dreams come true! Oh boy, was I naive.
I feel like Only Friends had me speedrun the whole BL industry. Branded pairs, production houses, fanservice, obsessive fans & haters, audience reactions influencing the storyline, EVERYTHING happened during Only Friends and I was just like "what the hell is going on here?" It was like the perfect case study for literally everything. Honestly I still don't really understand what's going on.
Unfortunately, this also led to the awful ending I erased from my brain and don't want to get into, I'm just gonna say Boston I will never forgive the writers for what they did to you. I dropped that show like a hot potato, filtered all possible tags and moved on — or so I thought.
I feel like I'm trying to recreate that first excitement when I discovered OF. But 20 shows later, I'm still not there. Does this make me sound like an addict? Yes, and this is why Only Friends EP 1 is my No. 1 moment that altered my brain chemistry.
2. The Boeing Incident - Only Friends
I talked about it just yesterday and I need to do it again because Boeing was the beginning of a thing that thought I'd never be capable of: lusting after real person TV characters. I talked about it in length here and here so the only thing I'm gonna add just for good measure is that I'd do anything, anything for a BostonBeoingNOZ threesome. Holy shit I'm cringing just writing this down but I need to get my point across.
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3. Still Looking For That Kiss - Love in The Air
I know this is a general experience at this point but the chemistry between the couples in Love In The Air opened a whole knew world for me. I thought I knew chemistry but when I saw them, I realized I knew NOTHING.
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It may sound weird but I'm still looking for that perfect kiss that's hitting all the right neurons in my brain. I have a hunch that one of these two pairs will deliver them one day, but until then I NEED to watch a million kisses for research.
This post by @talistheintrovert explains perfectly what I think about kissing in shows. Ji Chang Wook is still the blueprint for me.
But do I have a favorite BL kiss so far? Yes, yes I do. It's this ShinPeach beauty.
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4. Main Lead Syndrome - Kiseki: Dear To Me
I am a second lead, side couple enby before I am human but I will defend these two until the end of time. My TL is flooded with Chen Yi, Ai Di, Nat and Louis while these two are over here falling in love over strawberry cake, cat analogies, failed cooking and all sorts of memory loss. Zongyi opened a fucking bakery for his babygirl and Zerui pretended to be a pretty dumdum to protect the love of his life.
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I don't care how much you all love the two dumb (affectionately) gangsters, these two deserve the world, end of story. Also Kai Hsu and Taro Lin are bff's irl now, Taro said that Kai helped him get out of a very bad mental tate and I take that very personally.
5. The Fanservice is Fanservicing - Kiseki: Dear To Me
Speaking of Taro and Kai, the fact that I even know that they're bff's is another brainaltering moment that needs recognition because months later it led me to this TikTok of two actors I don't know of a show I don't watch, staring at them for ages and really considering watching it just because of it.
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That is the power of fanservice my friends and I can put on my clownmask now because I avidly screamed left and right that fanservice should be forbidden when I learned about it. I blame Kiseki for that. But my point still stands, I hate actors doing stuff they're uncomfortable with. I just hope they're all friends and have fun and get that coin.
6. The One Just For Me - Playboyy
I've been lurking around Playboyy from the moment I found out they have the same writer as OF. And boy did it deliver so far! I already wrote a bunch here about which role Playboyy plays for me, but it's also a wonderful case study for my producer heart — watching the acting, directing, lighting, sets, props and storyline interact is fascinating.
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People say the less you notice the better the show, which is correct, but I love all the flaws of this piece of media. IMHO it's the last puzzlepiece of the amazing, important social commentary the show delivers. All of the topics the couples represent need to get their very own show.
7. The Holy Grail - The Sign
Speaking of the less you notice — this is the sign for The Sign (again, sorry). There's a reason this show is loved and praised so widely because the production is on a whole other level. Adding the beautiful story on top of that, we have the potential for a holy grail here and I'm so in for the ride.
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I keep saying I've entered the world of BL in it's absolute golden era. Never in a million years did I think I'd watch 5 shows simultaneosly but I love every single one of them so much I keep a whole spreadsheet on how I can be on time for every premiere every week alongside my work schedule.
Honorable mentions
KinnPorsche: VegasPete were my first dark, angsty, morally questionable couple ever (I'm a sissy okay)
Last Twilight: When I watched Extraordinary Attorney Woo, I cried several times about the wonderful media representation of disability. It means so much to me and Last Twilight is on par with that.
Bake Me Please: Thank you for giving me this beautiful kiss
Manner of Death: Thank you MaxTul for making gay makeouts fashionable
Bad Buddy: The one time I was glad I persisted so I could watch them most adorable phone scene on the planet
I Feel You Linger In The Air: It was too painful for me to finish but I loved the show with my whole heart and it deserves all the awards it got.
Kimi ni Todokanai: Japanese shows just hit different. I'll never get over the kissing Taiyaki.
The Novelist Series: THIS is how you kiss the one you're horny for my friends. Take notes directors.
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Semantic Error: My fav webtoon -> Got Viki for the Series -> Found the BL corner of Viki -> Drew my attention to Tumblr -> This post.
Thank you for being the butterfly of my butterfly effect.
And thank YOU if you read until here! To a even more wonderful queer year 2024! I'm so ready for this ride.
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esorxy · 10 months ago
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remembering all the insanely long marauders fics ive brainrotted over because i kinda forgot all of them. roughly in the order i read them.
Whatever happened to the young, young lovers?
355k, jegulus wolfstar rosekiller. post war (ended by regulus) where they just hang around grimmauld place all day. i literally cant remember anything that happened. but i liked how they stayed home and didnt go outside, because i relate to that. it was alternating chapters between post war and pre war, honestly i dont even know it was just so much relationship angst and regulus being incredibly competent and hurt.
All The Young Dudes
526k, the character development and buildup, its like the level of the actual series without the annual voldemort attack. i was DESTROYED by the ending, it lived in my brain rent free for like a week. why did it have to be canon compliant???! the way they spent so much time pining, so much time apart, and so little time together. but that theyre literal soulmates, which is so sad for grant (he suffered true emotional damage) lmfao. I guess this is the basis (canon??) of marauders era
we can be heroes, for ever and ever
102k alternate happy ending to atyd - yes PLEASE this is what i needed to heal the pain after reading atyd.
choices
624k. lowkey feel the same way towards this as atyd, except it didnt live in my brain rent free for a week. in that i respect that it's good and got heartbroken when everyone died and they didn't get their happy ending, but it did get me into jegulus so I'm not complaining. IDK it's just sad, but i love regulus and evan and cerci. even though i deadass can't remember anything else.
crimson rivers
865k actually SOBBING this fic is everything. so much plot and so much hurt, it is amazing and painful and intense. it has the most picturesque scenes, beautiful happy ending. but i did kinda get sick of it near the end cos its so fuckin long, and i was not into the girls in the fic so i was kinda cbs
holding onto the self
76k and it was so good i felt so sad for sirius. this is the type of fic which makes me jaw drop and suck in breath like poor baby honestly. no summary needed cos ill never forget what its about lmfao....
just lovers
321k fake dating au. this is GREAT. its so light hearted which is a great change from the akckdjebakzj. this is the climb to the top for regulus being my favourite character. lowkey can't remember shit but i liked it and i need more fics like it because it was creative and there's not much room for that in marauders verse
only the brave
645k and The fic of my dreams. this is everything and i loved every second of it. every character is so great, and it got me into pandalily!!! perfect amount of hurt (a lot), and such good plot. it has every ship i like, i was like drowning in a hot spring of happiness while reading this
ecliptic
147k, oh it's so creative and new. it was so suspenseful cos we got 0 answers, and the fic is deadass incomplete wtf!! i love how everyone is sad but mostly rational. the jegulus was really really nice, and i liked how the cruciatus was made out to be a big deal so the hurt/comfort is better. i feel like the plot is better than the delivery
wolfstar my one true pair, jegulus my second true pair, evan®ulus has a special place in my heart, marauders fanfiction a permanent space in my mind for at least the next few weeks
new edit: shit! i forgot to update and i read so many more long fics and can barely remember them now
mastermind
311k i cant even remember anything that happened ... except i liked the dynamic between narcissa and regulus, and narcissa is so damn pretty. this was the one where regulus made james and sirius go with him to the cave, and then james had to force him to drink the potion, so much angst arghhhh.
all along there was some invisible string (tying you to me)
103k spiderman AU + high school and all i can say that its an original setting... the pining was great, and the spiderman kiss!! but other than that like it was good, i guess
I adored you madly, extravagantly, absurdly
243k Victorian AU with arranged marriage trans regulus. I loved regulus' character, he was so spiteful and petty but also down bad, and jegulus matched so perfectly together. i want his life so bad because his literal job was being married, like deadass he didnt do shit all day except read, play with his cats and pine for his husband...
a violent kind of spin
212k not going to lie, my favourite/most striking parts of this fic were the $h scenes... and i just finished it last night so I dont even have an excuse. james asking sirius to turn around and not even waiting for him to do it??? oml hes unhinged and it was so well written. the bathtub scene when he was on a timer and then just walked out like everything was fine!!! help it was so angsty im in love. i feel like i speedran this fic and didnt read it properly, which is probably accurate
Im not gonna teach him how to dance with you
122k. rosekiller is the BEST. i love the whole plot tbh and it was so well paced. love that for evan because nobody else is gonna keep by with barty's crazy. i would have liked it more if it had crack undertones but yknow whatever, cant have everything. i thoroughly enjoyed all the romantic tension in the leadup, the way they were both so in love im gone.
All the young dudes - Sirius' Perspective
628k, let me tell you, canon has no right being that sad, and the beloved author just fed off that like a parasite. i should have expected how this fanfic would destroy me, but the delivery made it so much more painful. i sobbed reading the Halloween and Azkaban chapters. and sirius,,, like why did you have to be so angry all the time. and so obsessed with remus from day 1. it was great. although like halfway through i just felt like ... wolfstar is so basic. jegulus once jegulus forever i guess.
whatever our souls are made of
157k hanahaki where we really gotta work for the happy ending. OML it was so beautifully sad. reggie 💔💔. sirius said nobody on the earth deserves his baby brother, but if he had to pick someone, it would be James 😭😭 I'm a broken man
oml i havent updated in 2 months... its ok i didnt read that much cos i was too tired with uni and work. anyway i found all my fics through tiktok, tumblr, or thru the author cos this gold mine is too big sorry chief. which is like. someone recommended this following fic :skull:
I'm not okay (I solemnly swear)
107k and unfinished :000 cant believe it i read something unfinished but when i read the tags i was like ok yeah im in. my secret is that i read fics like these!!! and most of them are not well written but this one is. and so was that other one about sirius but it was only like 78k so i didnt write it up. anyway poor reggie is going through it, and idk if its ever getting finished cos the poor author might be going through it too. additional note: idk if this is the one but bestie has so many problems like get help fr.
the veil of secrecy
100k but its unfinished and let me tell nobody i was devastated. omg it was so sad so the summary is after reggie defected voldymouldy found out and like --- got all his remaining horcruxes and stuffed them inside his chest and abdominal cavity in some crazy ass surgery. and then he sewed his mouth shut and broke his fingers and kept him around him like some porcelain doll/pet and thats the punishment????? oml how do u think of that... anyway so he dissociates into his fabric walls of occlumency so voldy doesnt know where the locket is. ok whatever they escape and he falls in love with jamie idk. its unfinished.
to the boy who...
238k its similar to the previous one (written by the same author ibbsterkisster) and i found it to read to cope with the first one not being finished. yes this is like 3x as long sighs we all know how it is. anyway its similar except reggie is like his boy toy instead... which is even worse. anyway i cant remember anything about the jegulus but i DO remember that evan was so sweet (as he is) he like stroked the bruise on reggies wrist very gently :facepalm: and that scene lives rent free in my brain.
blood on my shirt, heart in my hand
22k and id just like to say, this is the kind of horror that i like. its kinda a mystery at first but its not so creepy, and the jegulus endgame is stronger than a bulletproof vest. so james is having dreams which are vaguely murderous, and when he wakes up the events like kinda match up. turns out hes like having some repetitive dissociative episode every night at 12.37am and getting up to murder people. and after the first time reggie was just like 'well if ur in then im in too' and straight up helps him murder people ?!? i loved it. murder husbands.
the long game
250k and this is the most unique fic youll get here. modern high school au where reggie is like this god genius talented painter and they work on a musical set together, and reggie gets an art show and idk why this stood out to me but he drew like a green soft and a purple cushion and was like... this represents me and evan, cos were ok separately but great together. i read this so long ago i cant even remember what i thought of it
jealousy, jealousy
85k + unfinished again!! anyway so bartylus fake date so james and evan can get jealous and then they both end up together. i just remember it was so cute because they would just hug each other like constantly all the time, and cry at the smallest inconvenience, then their friend/boyfriend would go and lie with them in bed and hug them and that was like a very significant portion of it. and im not even complaining this is the type of physical affection they deserve
pathological people pleaser
114k but it passed so fast?!?! james is so fuckin unstable man like get a therapist. ok i actually enjoyed this so much because for some reason i was really into horror (it was literally 2 days ago) and this wasnt horror but they did not reveal like why james was so fucked, and which parts of his narration were unreliable until quite a bit in. also there was more than a month gap between me bookmarking this one and the last one and like i dont even know what i did with myself??? (actually i lied i read more fanfiction i just forgot i did cos i forgot to bookmark it) (summary: summer holiday where starchaser fall in love also effie died in a car crash on the way to james after he called and was like mom im gonna kms. ok but it was really well written and full of suspense)
anti-hero
237k and i just finished it so its fresh in my mind (for once) ok now that i think about it i have no idea why regulus lived that first time... maybe i didnt read closely enough but like when fics are that long i kinda just miss some stuff or forget it and they all blur together anyway. ok so firstly i want a story of james and regulus in this universe when they were still at hogwarts because like having a secret relationship for 2 years and also doing drugs.. just the hurt comfort ahhh maybe without all the hurt and yelling but whatever. cant have it all. anyway this was so well written i always like narcissa tbh. glad james and regulus sorted out their shit eventually even though it took so. fucking. long. anyway yikes (summary: reggie lives after the cave and they go horcrux hunting and kill voldy but then reggie fucks off to america and becomes a drug addict again but comes back, and james has anger issues but only when it comes to regulus anyway they kept hurting each other that i didnt even feel sad anymore when it happened) addition: oml reggie being an addict + nic in beautiful boy the stars aligned finally i get some visual scenes in this fandom
doing a word count sum of the above and its: 6 million and 476 thousand...
meetings that start in the dark
656k and oml i was SEMI HOOKED. honestly like why did it take them so fucking long to get back together like the moment Voldemort dropped dead James should have been unable to stay away from regulus. anyway love how they're obsessed with each other, love how Luna and Harry are playing matchmaker. and i especially love how Sirius was the lame embarrassing parent ahah. also the amount of bs evan has to put up with from reg and barty... jesus christ i loved them in this except for how he was buff girl no evan is a twink and this fic wont change my mind
sometimes, running away does solve all your problems
15k so reggie literally walks out of his house and his parents dont even notice and he runs away and meets james and they live together it was perfect omfg i loved it so so so much. it had the same sad, resigned tone as the dsmp fics that i was obsessed with before and would reread over and over. and the small village quiet life is a dream
27 club
27k and why was it so heavy oml like i didn't sign up for this sadness. ok so reggie is DEAD but before that he and James were like lovers and drug buddies but also lacked healthy communication. james is like bye imma get clean without u, the literal love of my life. the whole thing was so sad because it would be like one bit of 'oh and they were in love and making music' and then another bit of 'james was mourning so hard he couldnt get out of bed'. it was lowkey magical to read except for how hes dead.
you missed my heart
100k and omfg im in shock tbh. like what the actual fuck. I'm in shock in an "im unsettled and creeped out" way. i don't even know why because ive read serial killer jegulus fics before and it was all peachy, but maybe this one was so creepy because we were in the dark, and the killing isn't unrealistic and romanticised. James was so smitten with regulus too I'm crying i was actually convinced that reggie wasn't the killer. i need soft regulus fluff to cope with this. to erase the image of reggie being a psychopath. omg Sirius after finding out the truth.. poor boy was like catatonic. I'm never reading unhappy ending fics again I've become weak my heart can't take it
I'm going to start including the shorter fanfics that i read and are memorable as well because i don't discriminate
which means i have a lot of catching up to do
the moment and the sound
29k so james runs away with harry to escape voldemort and meets reggie by chance. they live together and james is like straight up depressed. i liked this fic but also forgot what it was like.
raise hell
30k it's basically about them being angels and demons and working together to idk stop the world from ending. i liked the tone of the fic in that everyone was like set in their ways and was like wtf at everyone else but also i wish it was longer and there was more about each person's like representation like Sirius being the angel of justice. also it was so funny regulus the angel of diligence and James the demon of lust.
blackpool
63k and omg it was so well written but i was so confused the whole time cos i have no literary ability. like regulus being a straight up unreliable narrator?!?! deadass in shock half the time reading this tbh
calm before the storm
51k and i could draw a graph of the shock factor of this fic and it would look like a staircase with 3 steps. at the start it was so happy and cute and i was like omg why did i click on this again and then sirius dies and james loses his memory and reggie is like fucked up that's the first step up and then they heal whatever but then reggie straight up starts murdering people and making a show out of it i read it all like 😳😳. unhinged fr, and also everyone tried to kts at least once like besties go see a therapist please
pink lemonade
121k band tour au where they sing (i think mostly) arctic monkeys songs and kudos because the lyrics all fit so well to whatever clown ass miscommunication situation jegulus have going on. it was relationship angst and maybe i would have enjoyed it more if i read it earlier but rn i need action and thrill. i was like to my irl friend like miscommunication angst isn't enough for me anymore i need murder and she was like girl wtf.
youngblood
75k basically jegulus were roommates in juvenile detection and they had such a deep soul connection in the 2 months and then never reconnected until like 9 years later. ok anyway my favourite part was James and how he was so unhinged. like literally provoking bullies so they hurt him is his form of sh... girl get a grip honestly but also respect for the idgaf factor
mercy
36k so james gets possessed by a ??demon called mercy and reg is an exorcist... so its very obvious what drew me into this. anyway james lives at regs house while hes figuring out what the fuck is wrong with him and they just ??? fall in love. ok slow burn was not really burning at all more like a ticking bomb but the horror was cute. also i found it at night and then read it all at like 8-9am in the morning before getting out of bed so i cant remember it but it was well written and the demon was lowkey cute too he was just out for drama which i can relate
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give-grian-rights · 2 years ago
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Hermitcraft Fic Rec!
HELLO. i have hundreds, HUNDREDS of hermitcraft fanfiction bookmarked and living in my brain without rent. Breaking this up into categories for some of my PERSONAL favorite fics in the fandom- including categories for shipping, crossover, and worldbuilding.
Some of these fics are from 2019 but generally speaking you don't need knowledge of past seasons you should be able to pick up on just about all of them. a lot of these are mostly included BECAUSE they're older and therefore, harder to accidentally stumble upon. put in no particular order.
If your fic is on here and you'd like it removed, send an Ask with the fic, a dm, etc
World Building
The Parting Glass / To Pass The Jungle You Have To Go All The Way Around - Sekrap.
Doc has been trying to forget. He has done everything everyone told him he should do to make the memories go away. And still the jungle calls for him. / He was a monster. Then, a man. Now, a machine. Doc, once a normal Creeper, was not meant to live. Let alone become a Player. He learned to speak, he learned to fight, he learned to build. Some things stayed the same. aka- the Domestic Creeper au.
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Carpet Trick - CrazyCatMeow
You all know the double carpet trick right? What happens when that joint with a tired mad scientist meet.
Mob hybrids can't see carpets <3 extra silly and very lighthearted
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Window Pane - blueticked
Tango and Impulse discuss the brand new presence of Helsknight.
It's not a coincidence that all the evil personas have red eyes.
Tango is a Hels, struggling with self-acceptance and his place in Hermitcraft, which was never meant to be for him. in my head ALL THE TIME
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"I know" - KindaJustHere
Bdubs was used to death. He was used to being killed by his fellow hermits. He was very used to being killed by Grian. Maybe a little too much.
(This is based off Grian’s episode 61 of hermitcraft season 7 where Bdubs says “I know” and shoots himself) BDUBS SELF ESTEEM ANGST!! Griangst !!!! Emotionally fucked up Grian from YHS !!
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Hiss and Scratch - TheNerdyTurtle96
Doc is a mad scientist who isn't afraid of anything. Actually, that's not true. His only weakness is cats.
exactly like it said it is . SO GOOD AND CUTE
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For the Record - Anonymous
Tango shrugged. “Yeah, I guess I did. Xisuma’s teaching Impulse some Galactic Standard so he can cheat at enchanting or something. Apparently Xelqua’s, like, some sort of god in Xisuma’s culture? It was kind of unclear, I wasn’t paying attention when Impulse told me.”
“Huh,” Grian said vacantly. “How about that.”
oops! Grian is Xisuma's god. amazing
____ GrianMC - SixteenthDays
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Techno says frankly.
“You know,” Grian says again. “Your- Watchers.”
Techno squints for a moment before understanding visibly dawns behind his eyes. “Ohhh, you mean Chat?”
(On watchers, and Watchers.)
This IS technically a crossover but its more worldbuilding than anything else. its literally so funny. i love it
Crossover
These Days I Don't Feel Like Myself At All / Mercury (No One Can Unring This Bell) (Series Ongoing) - RoguishOne (DarkWolfMoon)
TommyInnit had died. Again. To Dream. Again. And it sucked exactly as much as he thought it would because he'd wanted to move on and have a chance to actually live this time. Seems he won't be getting that.
Then he gets pulled out of Limbo, but he doesn't wake up back in the cell with Dream or next to his bed on the server. He doesn't wake up on the Dream SMP at all.
Little does he know that this is the least of his worries.
i want to scream and cry and hypervenilate thinking about this fic series. literally cannot recommend it enough. your life will be ROCKED. THE WRITING IS SOOOOO OGOOOD . i just want to shake. i cannot put into words what this fic makes me feel.
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Shells in the Foam (a Hermit!Tommy fanfic) - Cedarwhisp21
When Dream attacks Tommy in Logestshire, Tommy runs. Badly injured, he somehow manages to slip between worlds and wakes up in a badlands biome, on a server far from home, with no other players in sight.
The Hermits are surprised when a new player logs in, and confused when no-one's at spawn. Five days later, after waiting for the new player to introduce themselves, Xisuma uses his admin abilities to access their coordinates. He takes Impulse with him to welcome the new player to Hermitcraft, but instead of the beginnings of a base, they find something a lot more concerning.
NEEDS NO INTRODUCTION. the NUMBER ONE kudo-ed hermit fic . by my beloved. and using the one of the beloved au by pertrichormeraki . its so good and im sooo glad i was here for the ride of seeing it unfold <3
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let me give you a piece of my mind - Interjection
Dream and Grian practice building for MCC, and hold a conversation in the process.
Or,
Grian gives an outside perspective on Dream’s actions. Dream is having none of it.
Grian is a fucked up lil guy <3 Dream is a piece of shit
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He would not die - Nicoforlife
If phil could save only one person from this place, that would be enough.
Tldr I made phil a watcher :)
Watcher Phil and Grian !! ! !!
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Scared as hell - Nhi_theuserof_this
Grian was one of the closest people to Fundy at this point. He wants to be honest, really, but with the rest of his family history being a total train wreck, he spends an awkwardly long time dancing around what he wants to say.
Tldr; Grian is Fundy’s uncle, Fundy comes out to him
OK SO THIS ONE. WAS BASED OFF ONE OF MY AUS but i had to include it. ok .short and sweet
It was just a game - QuasarsFaults (UNFINISHED)
Taurtis Has been on the server awhile now, he's made new friends, a really tasty toritos shop, a new job working with Concorp, and he's even made this really cool pirate rollercoaster. So why did his and Scar's idea go so wrong?
OK. so i honest to god cannot remember if this is my au or if i just partook in it. i think its my au. who knows. either way seeing this again makes me want to work on my own Taurtis-Became-a-Hermit-Instead-of-Grian fic
Shipping
heartfelt confession - mysteryguest
it shouldn't come as a surprise to iskall, he thinks, when he finally settles on a term that feels just right. and yet, it is. and it's dreadful, feeling that urge, that need to tell someone, without knowing if they would accept you or not.
at least he knows the person he can trust the most with this info is his boyfriend, mumbo.
non-binary and bigender Mumskull !!! coming out. finding identity. finding pronouns.
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I Hate You (I Promise I Don't) - BewitchingNotes
If someone asked Grian why he was relentlessly pranking Etho now that he was finally back in Hermitland, he'd say it was just for pure fun.
To Etho, it meant Grian was mad at him.
To everyone else, Grian had a huge crush on the redstone user and obviously didn't know how to communicate it.
OR: Grian just wants Etho's attention, Etho misreads this as Grian being mad at him, Grian thinks Etho hates him because of his pranks and everyone else just wants these boys to communicate properly already. Grian's love language is pranks...i love it
____ A Study Of Love in the Universe Itself - 2point5
Love had a strange meaning on Hermitcraft, where everyone loved each other. 
OR
Joe looks into the different ways he loves some of his fellow members, and what that means for him as a human.
ITS A SERIES TOO AND ITS SOOOO GOOD i love it . Joe x Cleo x Bdubs x Etho . what more could you want. and their sexualities and how they perceive love is . OAUGHHGHGGHHGHGHBHGHFHHVIJXFSHDF IUSDHIUSAHDUIA
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unkat · 7 months ago
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For the ask meme: 🧠 Pick a character, and I'll tell you my favorite headcanon for them.
Love your Chilaios fics!
-sanityhasforsakenme
!!! Hi hi! I'm glad you like them, i really enjoy writing them and being a part of the fandom! :D
On the grounds of chilaios, i can do some for chil and laios:
Chilchuck
He has become so accustomed to being on edge while working in the dungeon, that he dreams about scenarios in his sleep, even when safely in his own bed on the surface. He is a worrier, and his worries follow him especially when there isn't anything else to keep him occupied. Taking too much responsibility for his party is both his love language and a sign of his learned distrust for others. Anime spoilers about Chil's life: It gets worse when his girls grow up and he doesn't have being a father to distract him. Immersing himself in his guild work is so involved with his dungeon delving that he gets even more lost in it, the distrust seeping from work to home until he doesn't even realize he has begun to drown in it.
Laios
While he is more careful not to share his special interests as much at first, having a small, consistent group of people who have not abandoned him even when he says something that is a social faux pas has improved his self-esteem. I feel like this gets even clearer when the canon events happen because it is the first time he has been with a group without Falin to carry the weight of smoothing social situations over for him. This really makes him more comfortable sharing his lore, and he ends up writing his own book(s) about the monsters from the dungeon, like a revised edition of the Gourmet Guide and then going more in-depth with it. He does all the art himself too.
Chilaios
What initially interested me in the ship was the open communication they had with each other, and their similar tactical mindsets focused on the dungeon itself. I feel as though they have a strong trust in each other, as strong as Chilchuck more obviously, Laios less obviously, CAN trust anyone. Regardless of the shipping potential, there is a strong love and loyalty between those two, carefully buried through Laios' social struggles and Chilchuck's preference to be perceived as socially aloof. ALL THAT SAID, headcanon is that when Chilchuck is feeling more social with Laios, he brings up different scenarios for Laios to visualize and parse through, both tactical and social ones. I think that Chilchuck is used to self-reflection and preparation by imagining hypotheticals, and it is an activity he can do with Laios that they both benefit and bond from. Additionally, Laios being able to map out solutions sometimes cuts through what Chilchuck gets spun up about, getting Chil out of his own head. Their passions both lie with their work, and they learn a lot from each other through this kind of analysis and planning. Shipping-brained, they both are touch-starved and unaware of how desperate they are for a deeper connection with each other, emotions totally blindsiding them when they realize the depths of their feelings. Two pretty logical guys having huge emotions who don't comprehend what they share and how it should look. They find the physical aspects easier than the emotional ones, and settle into a friends-with-benefits relationship before a romantic one.
Ty for your message! Ask Game from here.
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moongothic · 11 months ago
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Okay, here goes. What's your ultimate Crocodad timeline? You can go as wild or as believable as you want.
I mean I made this timeline chart/post/thing.
But if you meant it in a more "how do you think things actually went down" specific kinda way, uhhhhh. Great question, not sure I know how to answer. Like. The possibilities on what could've happened and how are nearly endless and all those options are so interesting to me. Even if there's ideas I feel like might be more likely than others, or I find myself more invested in some ideas, I can't fully like, dedicate myself to any specific idea for a plot point or a storybeat or anything, especially if there's nothing to suggest if anything even remotely similar could've happened.
Like, say for example, how did Crocodile and Dragon meet? There's literally infinite ways they could've met, to the point I'm not even really that interested in speculating on it, because more likely than not, any guess I make will probably be wrong. Like speculating about something like that feels almost pointless. Compare that to say, how did Luffy end up in Garp's care? While we know like nothing about what exactly happened, we do have any theoretical information (ex: Garp and Croc should not know about each other, meaning there must've been a third party to deliver the baby, and it's more than likely that was Dragon) that we can get to much more specific when speculating about what might've happened. Like there's still plenty of options, but the options are far fewer, which makes the speculation so much more interesting, for me at least
But at the same time, I don't want to get too fond of any idea in because Oda could still prove me wrong and debunk it and I'd be sad if I got like fond of a concept and I ended up being dead wrong lmao
Mind you, for me, a big part of the reason I'm invested in the theory to begin with IS the possibility of it being canon. Like yes Crocodad would and always will make for fun AU fanfics regardless of if it's canon or not. But I am here to more or less speculate about canon.
So between my brain treating Crocodad as this monstrous, gigantic flow chart, and me not wanting to get too attached to any potential path on the chart... Yeah I don't know what to tell you anon, I'm sorry
Like. Just as an example. On how my brain processes this shit.
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(Sidenote, this chart is like under the assumption that Croc and Dragon had mutually agreed that their child would be put in the care of Dragon's father. And while that makes the most sense to me by a long shot, technically it's totally possible Luffy was taken away from Crocodile by force by Dragon or something else) (THERE'S SO MANY POTENTIAL THINGS THAT COULD'VE HAPPENED, AHHHHHHH)
Like here, I think the most likely canon scenarios would be the "Respectful Rejection" followed by "Too Stunned To Speak -> It's Bad" routes, though personally I might be most interested in the "It Was Really Bad" route because it'd be really fucked up and sad
So like. Yeah. I have no idea what my "ultimate Crocodad timeline" would be, there's too much room for speculation to the point anything specific would leave the room of Neutral Canon Speculation and just turn into a plain old fanfic, and I'm just here for theorizing
But hey if you wanted a fanfic, here's a TL:DR;
(You know I say this is a TL:DR; but this got so fucking long it almost broke this post. Like Tumblr would not let me save the draft or post it anymore because there's a 4k character limit to "blocks", I had to break this into chunks man)
If Crocodile was betrayed by his crew after losing to Whitebeard and had to kill them himself in self-defence;
Who the fuck knows, maybe by some twist of fate our wounded/dying, exhausted and traumatized Crocodile drifted in the sea and his ship ran into Dragon, the man rescuing Crocodile from the kindness of his heart or something IDK
If the dude had to kill his own crew immidiately after Whitebeard crushed his hopes and dreams, Crocodile must've been just absolutely shell shocked. Depressed and withdrawn, just out of it. So maybe Dragon being there could've been great for Croc's mental state. Maybe. Big maybe.
If Crocodile did turn out to be the Rev Army's Secret Sugar Daddy then perhaps this is how that relationship kind of started: Crocodile could've paid Dragon in cash money as thanks for saving his life, and then just kept the money coming since Dragon had an army to run and needed the funds
(Like we don't know why Crocodile joined the Shichibukai anyways, but if it was only ever for The Benefits of not having to deal with the Marines chasing his ass anymore and if he didn't give a rat's ass about the Government... Like yeah, why not fund the Revolutionary Army, give money to the people trying to directly take down the fuckers while right under their noses.) (Who knows maybe Croc does have his own reasons for hating the WG and had like a genuine reason beyond just being a petty king and/or having basic human decency in understanding why the WG was corrupt and needed to be overthrown)
Thus begins a secret comradery where Crocodile every now and then goes and drops off some money to Dragon to help fund the Army, nobody on either side of the war any wiser (except maybe Iva-chan, they're allowed to be in on the secret, as a treat). It's their secret that they keep for years
Time passes
Whoopsie poopsie Crocodile's prégónánté
The two realize that their kid is going to be in so much danger for a pletora of reasons and that neither can raise the baby. Dragon knows his father would keep their baby safe and they both agree to leaving the child to him (not a happy decision, it's just for the best, for everyone's sake)
Anyway Crocodile's gender dysphoria goes into turbo mode during pregnancy. Maybe he never really realized it was there and/or what it was, but boy howdy, it's there now and it's really really bad. Like, if it wasn't for the baby he might just kill himself (and god knows once the kid is out and taken away, there's not going to be anything to stop him from doing just that)
Crocodile must've gone into hiding during the latter half of his pregnancy to keep it a secret from the Government, and I could totally imagine him being hellbent on being completely isolated. He is a Shichibukai, everybody knows him, he can't risk having even some random doctor recognize him and find out about the baby. Besides, it's not like he can do much while hiding anyways, like he might as well read 150 medical books to ensure he can deliver his baby by himself
(Sidenote but the narrator in OP has called Fuusha Village Luffy's "birth place" (think the term he used was "umereta machi", lit. "town he was born in"), and if that's true, then. Croc should've been hiding in and/or near Fuusha Village in Goa Kingdom. Additional sidenote, there are wild crocodiles in Goa, which are the Sir's favorite food.)
To avoid suspicion and the risk of being found out, Dragon might've agreed to not go see Crocodile during this time, only agreeing to see his significant other after the child was born so he could then deliver the baby to Garp (after not just leaving the Marines but also starting a fucking revolutionary army, the dude probably didn't want his father to find out he had been dating a fucking WARLORD)
But surely he'd think Crocodile was insane if he thought he'd let Crocodile deliver the baby alone. Like no, somebody needs to be there by his side. Someone Dragon could trust, a fellow Revolutionary perhaps. Oh yeah, just send Ivankov, what could possibly go wrong
(Personal headcanon but since we don't know when Ivankov got their Fruit, I kind of want to imagine they ate it just a short time ago at this point and that they hadn't fully realized the potential of the Hormone Fruit yet. Like their genderfluid ass may not have understood the power they now held)
Iva-chan did not know Croc was prénánté, whether Dragon told Ivankov ahead of time why they were being sent to check on Croc is up or debate (if Iva-chan was aware of Croc being their Secret Sugar Daddy though then I'm sure they understood why Dragon wanted and was willing to help out Crocodile in this situation). Croc and/or Dragon probably lied through their teeth about the father of the child if Iva-chan ever asked about it, and whatever Iva-chan was told they clearly bought it since they never knew about Dragon having a kid.
When Iva gets there though they can see right away that something is fucking wrong with Crocodile, in ways even he can't understand. He is so uncomfortable 24/7 for seemingly no reason. So naturally Iva-chan pokes and prods at the dumbass until Croc has a break down and explains his weird feelings he can't even word properly and this is how Emporio Ivankov discovered transgenderism
What's that? You don't like what pregnancy has done to your body, doesn't feel like it's yours anymore? You feel love for your child but don't want to be its mother? Good news, you can be its father instead. Bad news, gotta wait until the baby is farted out. Aren't sure about it? No worries, there's time to think about it, and shit's 100% reversible anyways. Just hang in there for a little bit longer, you may feel god awful rn but that too shall pass
(Maybe this is how Iva-chan starts calling Crocodile "Crocoboy", just to get him to warm up to the idea that he could be(come) a man, get used to it etc)
Crocodile has an identity crisis of a lifetime. Like either he knew since he was a small child that something was fucky wucky, or he never realized it until now, either way, he must not have even been aware of the idea that he could trans his gender (which would make sense if Ivankov only recently got their Fruit just sayin'). So yeah. Enjoy that gender crisis, dumbass
Like he straight up just goes through the five stages of grief before he's like "god dammit if it'll make me feel less like I'll kill myself then it's worth a shot, don't care what Dragon ends up thinking"
At some point Croc must've contacted Dragon at least one final time just so they can agree on when and where they'll meet to hand over the baby once it's born (if Croc doesn't die at child birth. I mean they both know he'll be fine, Croc's survived worse. But if something did happen, Iva-chan will take care of the baby until Dragon arrives)
This is One Piece. Luffy was born at dawn.
Crocodile probably insists on getting the T literally immidiately after the baby is out. If he doesn't just pass out immidiately after giving birth. But like within 24 hours of giving birth. Iva-chan is probably like "Crocoboy you're exhausted, chill, your cooch needs to recover" and he's just like "why wait for it to recover when you're going to get rid of it, just do it"
(Iva-chan probably goes and gets Croc some emergency clothes and like bottles and baby food etc because god knows he's going to burst out of his old clothes and he ain't gonna have the tiddies to breastfeed that baby either)
Anyway he gets the rones and gets to enjoy gender euphoria for the first time in his life. Happy times, happy tears, a happy croc
Dude probably nearly shits himself when he tries to speak as he is now voiced by Ryuuzaburo Fucking Ootomo (even Iva-chan is like "HOLY SHIT your voice dropped") (like they probably agressively try to encourage Crocodile to speak more and let them hear that voice and Croc is like "ssssshhhhhhhhh stop yelling you'll wake up the baby!!")
Anyway he finally gets to fucking rest and relax and enjoy the sheer relief of not just being free of his dysphoria but also his baby boy being born and looking all healthy and happy. A happy dad
(If Crocodile was the first person Iva-chan helped transition, and under these circumstances specifically. I think seeing the guy and his sheer relief would give like Iva-chan a new mission in life. To help people like Croc)
(Ivankov: "It's like a great weight has been lifted off your chest... GET IT, 'CAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE TITS ANYMORE! HEEHAW!!" / 🐊: "If you wake up the baby I will skewer you")
Anyway if the Rev Army member stays with Crocodile for too long there's a risk of them getting found out and that'd be bad, so Iva-chan needs to GTFO (they have better things to do, like overthrow some governments and stuff). Also Crocodile needs to prepare because he can't have the Government wondering where the fuck he's been all these months much longer (god knows explaining his sudden manliness is going to be enough to deal with) and the kid needs to go into hiding. If Iva-chan asks where the child is going, Croc probably won't give a straight answer, just that there's a plan and he needs Ivankov to keep the baby a secret etc (perhaps that could be the blackmail Iva-chan brought up in Impel Down 🤔)
Crocodile gets to spend a little time with his baby boy (before and/or after Iva-chan leaves). Crocodiles (the animals) look after their babies for three months before they're on their own, so at most he stayed with his baby for three months, though I'd argue just 3 weeks, simply because that'd a painfully short amount of time that's just perfect for tragic storytelling
Perhaps that was the happiest time of Croc's life. No stupid Government to deal with, no pirates to fight, no villages to pillage. Just him and his beautiful baby boy. Not even the knowledge of knowing he'd have to say goodbye to his son forever would get in the way of his happiness at that moment.
(Did he ever think about what to name the child? Maybe Dragon had wanted Crocodile to name their child and Crocodile was supposed to think of something while expecting, before the baby was born. Or maybe, knowing he would never see that child again (until the Government blows up) he could not bring himself to think of a name. It'd be Dragon's father who'd look after the baby anyways, Dragon should name him)
Dragon comes. Either exactly at the agreed upon time, or perhaps a day early (dude was too excited and wanted to be with his wife and child, together as a family, even if it was for a day). Whenever he arrives;
See the chart earlier in the post
However things go down, Dragon and Crocodile go their separate ways. Crocodile leaves the island immidiately.
Well. I certainly became absolutely deranged writing this.
HOPE YOU FOUND THAT ENTERTAINING
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killershrike · 3 months ago
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yall I had such a strange dream i think I've been watching too many alien movies because I had a dream me and a team of astronauts were sent up into space under a false mission
And first me and a girl on the team were the last ones left and we were trying to escape when we looked outside and saw that there was an alien ship on its way to earth covered in the black goo and we were like "no, we have to die" and on the alien plant the remaining girl from the team could see the ship coming and sent a bomb up towards us and exploded us
And then as I "woke up" I saw all the people on the team again, we were all suited up like we were just about to start the mission again. I could tell something was wrong and in the wall there was a circle that looked like an eye and i said "an eye.."
The captain of the team said "what?" And then the eye opened and it revealed the inside of the space ship we had just been inside and exploded.
We started freaking out, panicking, trying to get out of the ship but it's automatically set to leave.
We "woke up" again, and this time we were on Earth, we thought we were all dead and in some sort of afterlife. Until a massive shadow started to cover the earth, and we looked up, seeing the alien ship with black goo hurdling towards earth. I close my eyes, hoping it to wake up and open them, in the ship again.
I was looking around the ship, watching everyone scream. One of the girls was shouting and crying, "I just want to die! Please! Just let me die!"
And for some reason, I realized something and started to self destruct the ship. Someone asked me what I was doing and I said, "We won't end up trapped here if we never come in the first place."
The ship explodes, we wake up again, and I'm naked on a cold floor in the middle of a massive room with tons of bunkbeds. Suddenly, people start to fall from over the bunk railings and crash to the ground. I can see that they're all me and the team, us over and over again but with eyes shut and zombie like as they walk over the railing and fall to the ground.
I close my eyes and panic, when I open them, we're back at the ship, the team preparing to leave.
I rush inside and start to activate the self-destruct, ignoring the way people start to scream and shout. The captain tries to stop me, grabs me, and asks what the hell I'm doing. I look up at him, crying, terrified to the core, and say, "Remember. Remember what's going to happen."
Realization passes through his eyes, and he lets me go. He goes to sit down, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, ignoring the way the team shouts.
Before I press the button, I silently beg the universe to let us go and let it end before pressing it. I remember fire engulfing the ship, me, and the team. But even as I can feel fire burning my body alive, I start to laugh in relief, and the rest of the team joins me.
Then I actually fully woke up. Someone tell me what the actual fuck is wrong with my brain right now cause that was such a fucked up dream
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martinys-world · 1 year ago
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The Girl
this is my first time ever to wright this on tumblr. let me know if you are want to see more. I have a whole back story to this. This is not proof read, so please let me know if there a mistake I want to see if it worth working on.
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“You get everyone to the ship and escape with the key.”
One ape hand it to another. 
“what happening.”
“What about you. “
“I will distract scrope and his terracons as long as I can. It will give you and the others a chance to esape.”
I wont let you be left behind. Scrouge will kill you. My sacrifice will be nothing compared to what unicron can do with the key...
“ we need a …..”
Slinceing the other ape.
“ you are there leader now.” 
“ now go” 
With the idea of knowing there was no debate let alone time. ran. Leaveing the only place they called home. that will be devour by unicorn the planet eating monster. 
“ahh.” Hand covering my face. Trying to protect my self even thought it would do nothing. I felt a chil was what It felt like. The one that get you spinal core to shake. 
Looking back at the runaway ape did not see me.  I have to be dreaming. 
Then there this metal man robot. Is this a terrcon. What going why dose this look real. Is he losing what going on. 
“ please, stop fighting.” 
Everything was muggy. I don’t understand what going on but one thing was clear. No one is leaveing this fight alive. Everything happen so fast. They were both standing up and now one is loseing a battle that he cant win. 
Sound of a rocket was happing like it was blasting off. 
“ your not getting the key.”
“Today I won’t but my master with have a feast with your planet.”
I was running to the ape theat was laying on the ground. I couldn’t let him feel pain while he was dieing. I know none of these metal or anmials being cant see me. but dosent me I would sit back and do nothing. The one that won. Was melting something on him. He just became a blur. 
I slip pass his legs. If that was what they called them. I was at the apes face. 
“ what do I do? What can I do?”
“ put your hand on him and breathe.”
Spinning around. Trying to find something to show any type of alive or being. 
“wh-“
“If you want him to not be in pain anymore, just put your hand on him.”
I heard a groan. I will slove that voice mystery later. Put my hand on him I felt him skin want cold but smooth and warm. Surprisingly but what shock me more was the area my hand was. It was glowing and a green color. 
“huh?” 
Out of my instinct I want to pull away but the ape groan out of relief. Like he was in less pain. 
I knew that I was doing something. what would happen if I used both of my hands. I lift my hand. And place not tnext to mine but in the same level as mine. I felt eyes on me I  was next to his eye or what ever its called. Two eyes staring at one. 
“ midnight star.” 
Instead of correcting him. Knowing his time is running out.
“ its going to be okay. relax its going to be okay.”
I sounded confident but I was far from that. 
“you were always a star. in the darkest of times.”
For that slipt moment it steam like he accepted his death but wasn’t alone. I have no clue who he is but i am just glad he not alone or in a lot a pain. I saw the light shirnking as it seem like these minutes. Are turning to hours. I don’t care how long I knew the least I could do was make bearable. He closed his eyes for the final time and whisper his last sound in this life. 
“ thank you.”  
I pulled my hands back after his skin turned cold.  I was crying. I knew I was crying because there was not much I could do. I mean almost everyone cries when they see someone died, But this was different type of crying. Like I lost a friend but I never seen him before.
“sliver”
I fell to my knees in front of his eyes. It started to get windy. I wouldn’t have notice if a golf ball sized rock hit me in the side of my head.   turning to see what all the rush was about. This golden sphere was coming closer. And the center was opening up and there was rocks. My brain wasn’t comprehending what was happening. 
“Unicorn!!”
Chatper : (2)
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vanquishedjelly · 2 years ago
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Confusing Introductions
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10th Doctor X Reader Summary- The Reader has a very frightening start of their day, until a dashing man and his box comes to their rescue, but due to their brain being overloaded and confused by very new concepts, they think that they HAVE to be dreaming... right?
Writers Note- I wrote this story quite a while ago and have been contemplating if I should post it or not. It's short due to it being the first story i have ever written, but i am very willing to write longer and more in-depth stories in the near future!
It was strange.
Today was meant to go like every other day. but for some reason… Everything went topsy-turvy. I woke up with a startle from my alarm, 10:30pm like usual, signaling that it was time to get up and get dressed for work.
Everything was meant to be normal.... what happened?
I took a shower, made some food, and gathered my things. Anticipating that long work hours for tonight.
I walked to my car, quickly setting my things on the passenger side seat and then making my way around to the driver side… but something stopped me. the low humming…. the soft beeping…. the weird rhythmic vibration of the cement beneath me… I quickly looked around for any sign of machinery or… anything that could make such a noise… nothing. Nothing but the cars that lined my street and the soft buzzing of the street lamps that softly aluminate the pavement beneath me.
I turned back around, quickly opening my car door and about to sit inside until…"Come with us."
I shriek as I am yanked backwards by my wrists and slammed up against my car. I tilt and turn my head as best as I can. "What the hell are you doing!?" I shout at the people dressed as.. robots? I scoff of course, thinking this is some weird prank or an…. odd robbery. I see one of them come to my left side, gun in hand. Looks much like a water gun with shiny metal bits attached. I roll my eyes, a prank… of course. "I'm gonna be lat-" "you do not have permission to communicate." I furrow my brows. This is ridiculous! I stare at the man as he aims the "gun" at me. I wince, waiting for water to shoot out of this thing, until this weird red beam of light comes out seeming to scan me up and down. "It is what we need." I am pulled up from off the car with force. I wince from the strength of his grasp. Trying to shake him off only makes him grip tighter and I am for certain it will leave bruises. I am forced to walk with them, getting shoved every so often to keep pace.
As we walk, my eyes latch on to something I have never seen before... or at least never paid attention to.
In my neighbors yard sits…A strange police…box? I've never seen that there before… unless my neighbors has gotten really into a peculiar sense of decoration. I see a man step out of said box… He's not my neighbor and I’ve definitely haven’t seen this man before in my neighborhood- Who is he? I am knocked from my thoughts with a big shove, having stopped to stare at the man. The "robots" rushing me along as the man makes eye contact with me. He puts his finger up to his lips in a shushing motion as he slowly creeps through the shadows. I look forward hearing the same low humming and soft beeping, seeing some type of ship materialize right in front of me.
My head slowly starts to feel watered down. My brain trying to rationalize everything in front of me, yet every rational guess coming to a screeching halt as nothing right now makes any sense. We slowly approach this air craft of some sort. As we get 20 feet away from the ship, the robots start to spaz in front me, one by one falling to the ground. As the robots that were holding onto me falls, I'm taken down with it. My hands being held by the things harsh grasp, I can not catch my self- crashing into the body of one of the fallen robots. My vision turns dark, all senses seeming to collapse all at once. And that's where I am now... Having woke up in this blue box that is some how bigger on the inside than on the outside and the man that claims that he is the 'doctor' saying he saved me going on and on about quantum physics and time. "I'm gonna be honest," I say, halting the doctors unstopping discussion,
"I have already came to the conclusion that this," I jester around towards…. everything, "is a dream. This talk about time and this… thing…. box… makes no sense, not to mention the weird metal robots that tried to kidnap me….I would like to wake up now."
The doctor laughs seemingly amused, "believe what you want but this…” he mocks my jesters from earlier, "…is reality. I know that may be hard to decipher in that human brain of yours but you can't argue with a Time Lord." I stare, my mouth slightly agape, "a…. time… lord… you're kidding!" i say, laughing out of bewilderment. "nope, sorry to say I'm not kidding!" he says while shaking his head. I laugh, "well, until I am proved that I am not in a dream, I'm just gonna believe that all of this is… weirdly a part of my creativity." He tilts his head, a goofy smile showing up on his face as he makes his way around this table... controller... thing...
"Time shall tell." He quickly slams his fists down on a button, and flips a lever down. Everything kicks into actions from randoms sparks to the shaking and rumbling of the entire box as the doctor frantically pulls levers and turns things. Feeling my feet almost leave from underneath me grasp onto the nearest thing next to me, it being a hand rail. He looks at me, his grin growing huge…
"Oh this is gonna be fun!"
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flowersandbirdsflyingfree · 8 months ago
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Hiii ✨️ Your reply from my post got me really curious about headcanons for my self ship and I feel like I really need a kick back into posting all my drafted f/o posts...
Primis Dempsey is the absolute love of my life, and I was wondering what sort of hcs you had? I also want to come up with a new ship name, but I'm stumped thus far heh..
Sending big hugs 🩷✨️
- 🌾
Angel, I’ve got just the thing! I’m glad you’re back and I’m sending big hugs and lots of love to you💖💖💖
But FIRST!
A short little name brain storm
Guns and Roses
Bowie-Winged Butterflies (bowie knife btw, not the 80s singer)
Poppies and Primroses
Gun-Slinging Sweethearts
I hope these few can help, even if it helps the brainstorm have a clearer idea of what feels right.
Headcanons for you and Primis Tank:
Ohhh my GOSH. Every time Tank looks at you, it’s like a sense of pure wonder completely mesmerizes him. Smitten is an understatement
As a marine, his training and combat experience shook him down to experience constant hyper vigilance. Just your very presence helps him feel grounded again.
You have such an ethereal beauty to you! Not just in the way you naturally glow, but the way you dress yourself is just so gorgeous and so classy! You have him like moth to a flame. Tank can’t help but kiss you from head to toe every chance he gets
You’re that special someone who’s graced him with gift of tenderness that he’s secretly starved for. For that, he’s eternally grateful. He expresses this most through quality time and physical affection the most
I feel like he would give you one of these cheesy Valentine’s just to make you smile
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“Yeah, I know it’s dorky. But it made you smile!”
You might be a badass belle of your own, but Tank’s still going to feel the need to protect you. If anyone bothers you, he’s immediately up to bat against anyone and anything. Hell, he’d threaten to punch the dirt if you stepped on a rock. The man is incredibly devoted to helping you
Dempsey has a lot of depth to him. Only you ever had the chance to really know that. The battles he’s willing to fight for you extend past outside conflicts. You are never too much. You are worth more than every star in the galaxy.
“Remember when I said we’d fight side to side, back to back? I meant that from the bottom of my heart. We’re a team. And I’m willing to do whatever the hell it takes to keep you safe. You’re the woman I want to love ‘till the day I die. No matter what happens, I promise to protect you.”
Some songs for your ship: You I Need by Amorphis, Doe Eyes by Sophie Woodhouse, and No Other Love by Jo Stafford
He’s very easy going whether you want to go somewhere or stay curled up together at home. Fun dates include (but are not limited to 😉): picnic dates, walking along the beach shoreline, a trip to the shooting range, aquarium visits, shopping together, and so much more.
In his top left pocket is his mother’s blueberry pie recipe to remember her by. I can see you both working together in the kitchen to make it together! Kneading the dough, teaching him what to do, having him slow dance with you while waiting for it to bake. It’s one of his most cherished memories.
Tank lets you steal his leather jacket to wear often. In a modern AU where he’s a drill sergeant, he makes sure you help keep it safe while he’s off to work.
When you two snuggle in at night, you get to rest safe in the marine’s embrace. He softly strokes your hair while you rest your head on his chest, softly conversing until one of you fall asleep first.
Tank daydreams with you about what it’d be like running away to a cottage home. Coming home to that sweet smiling face of yours every day, tending to the garden, escaping the bustle of the world. One of these days, he’s gonna make that dream a reality for you both.
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cuubism · 1 year ago
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Hey I love your work so much, I just have a quick question to pick at that phenomenal brain of yours.
So this is WHUMP!Hob because my heart aches for this little man and I love him but I also want to see him go through the horrors.
Did any of us ever imagine what it’d be like if Hob had been on the Titanic? Not like an AU where Hob and Dream are Jack and Rose, but like canon universe.
What if Hob was on the Titanic when it sank??
I don’t think he’d get on the lifeboat because:
1) He’s Hob,our beautiful, lovable, self-sacrificing pillock that now holds all life over his own. If he can save just one more person, if one more live can be saved if he doesn’t get on that boat.
(He’d probably rag other men off the lifeboats too to make room let’s not gaff.)
2) He knows he’ll survive underneath it all. The stress and fear around him would probably get to him so much that it wouldn’t be the first thing he thought of (I mean that’s my person opinion because the titanic obviously was a mortifying experience)
3) He would leave the lifeboats to go below deck and literally deck the workers locking the lower class people under and to their deaths. He would 10000% break every gate and door he could find to free those trapped.
If he can survive drowning, then he’s going to hold his breath as long as possible to help those he can.
But then imagine him after the boat has gone under. After the lifeboats have abandoned those they couldn’t carry.
He’d be floating there hearing the screams of people around him and long after that, when he’s frozen and stuff, he’s drowned twice and come back, and latched onto an empty life jacket that he doesn’t want to think of why it was empty, and he’s just floating there.
And then he hears a whistle. Rose has been saved and he is found too, and he survives of course.
Imagine Dream finding out about this. It happened roughly 2 decades after their last meeting, where Hob thinks he screwed it all up.
He wanted an escape after it happened and then this cruise ship came along with promise of being unsinkable, and to an immortal man who sees the wonder of life, isn’t that bloody brilliant??
And then it turns into one of his reoccurring nightmares for decades, nay centuries to come.
How would Dream react to that?
I just think you could do more with this than I could, you know?
You don’t have to answer this if you don’t want to, I understand that some people tend to avoid asks/promos like these and if so, I completely understand! It’s just been in my brain for a while now.
So so sorry this is so long and badly written, I didn’t know how to phrase it.
Again, I LOVE your work, keep it up! Take a break when and if you need and I hope you have an amazing day/night wherever and whenever you read this!
<3 Meema
You have such a more generous interpretation of Hob's personality than I do, because my first impulse was "Hob is the ultimate survivalist and would definitely push somebody off the lifeboat" 😂. Then again, this is also in his post-1889 era which is the first era where it seems like he cared about or was trying to be a better person, so maybe not. Maybe he'd only push assholes off the lifeboat and not just anybody 😂
I could see Hob going on the Titanic though, he was involved in the ship-building business for a while so I can see him hearing about it being 'unsinkable' and being like hmmm bet. Anything for a new experience, etc.
Then it's sinking of course and he's like mmm fuck I can't die but I'm in the middle of the goddamn ocean. He does need to get on some lifeboat or something because even if he can't actually die of drowning he also can't swim hundreds and hundreds of miles to shore, he'll just be trapped out there or stuck in a cycle of dying from hypothermia and reviving for god knows how long. I doubt drowning is something Hob particularly wants to experience again anyway.
I really enjoy your kind Hob who wants to help people, I'm sorry that my mental image of Hob is hitting somebody in the head with an oar instead 😂 or at least, wanting to hit somebody with an oar, thinking back on his stranger saying 'you've changed,' dropping the oar with gritted teeth... XD Being a better person is hard-won and hard-learned for Hob, I think.
thank you for sending me the story 🥰
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