#<< and fuck ANY queerphobe too

[ftmgallade]

"hahaha i just HATE polyamorous people, they're just so GREEDY and UGLY"

these are all from the same right-wing channel. the polyamory video literally has a link to a book called "surviving fourth-wave feminism". how does it feel knowing that your opinions on a specific group of queer people are the same as a republican's? the same as people that're actively trying to kill monogamous people like you, just because they're queer?

[coridallasmultipass]

I am once again begging online shop payment processing companies to allow me to enter a separate name for shipping and separate name for billing!!

It's the same address, I'm just trans and have not legally changed my personal name, but I still prefer to receive mail as my preferred name! Like it's literally my professional name, I do business as my preferred name.

Annoying as fuck, and I don't want to chance my bank rejecting the payment (though I'm sure someone at my bank has put a note to allow it on my account by now, since I've contacted them a couple times before when I realized too late that the billing section didn't let me input another "address/name" section, and they said the payment was fine in those cases.)

Anyway, legal name changes should be free and non-advertised for everyone. Tbh, you should get a free name change every time you file your taxes on time as an incentive for good citizen behaviour. Once I am elected pres-

[pageofheartdj]

That awkward moment when you are like 'AM i lesbian?' but then you remember lesbian community and you just 'ah no gotta figure out what else can i be'.

[geee-three]

be me.

log onto tumblr (it's almost 11pm)

first post is callout post for someone (we still do those??) and one of the bullet points is 'theyre catholic'

fuck. i cant do this today.

block op. realise its a moot who reblogged it. have to block moot.

now im even more upset than i was before. great.

[bibridlizzie]

hey i would like to be very clear if anyone following me didn't get the memo, I am trans! specifically, i am nonbinary and agender! and i use neopronouns! SO if anyone transphobic is following me, please get the fuck off my blog bc this is not a space for you! also, while i am not jewish, i would also like to be very clear that antisemites are not fucking welcome here! found an antisemitic post on one of my followers blog and had to go block them so I wanna be very clear that no bigotry is welcome here!

[xx-slug-xx]

“Your fantasies equal your real life desires”

I’m fucking asexual? I have no desire to do anything I fantasize about irl. Same with a shit ton of other people who are aspec?

Tbh, I think it’s just queerphobic, specifically aphobic but other shit too, to say “your fantasies are what you want irl.

It’s not just aspecs either. I know a fuck ton of lesbians who fantasize about fictional men. They are not any less lesbians because of their fantasies though.

I could go on with more about how it’s a stupid argument, and even how it’s ableist in certain contexts, but I’ll save that for other posts lmao

[loveless-arobee]

My main gripe with the posts that are like "love is love includes platonic/familial/queerplatonic/etc. love" is ofc that they still fully ignore and exclude loveless people.

But what is also quite noticeable is that they also never mention sexual love. Because, it seems, in one stance about love (beside the "everybody loves"), a lot of aspecs still agree with society: that sexual love either just straight-up doesn’t exist, or that it’s inherently bad and abusive (that loving someone sexually without romance is abuse, "only using them for sex" etc.)

And on the other hand you also have aspecs acting like, on a societal level, sexual love is seen as equal to romantic love (with phrasing such as "love that isn’t romantic or sexual is devalued by society"), as if romanceless sexual love isn’t seen as basically the worst thing ever.

While I don’t experience love per se, the only type of love I can relate to even remotely is specifically sexual love. I care a lot for people I’m sexually attracted to, and sex is very important to me overall. And let me tell you, me expressing interest in a purely sexual relationship, no matter if I’d label my feelings as love or anything similar, are not ever treated any better than friendships or platonic relationships are.

I’m demonised to hell and back from queer people and non-queer allies and queerphobes all the same for my feelings and opinions on sex. Sex is seen as something that should only happen in very specific situations, and only then is it "good"; any other type of sex is "bad"; it’s just the definition that varies slightly between those groups—and I fit none of their definitions for "good" sex. No one sees sexual love without romance as a positive thing, least of all something equal to romance. (And especially not sexual intimacy and closeness without love and romance (or friendship, in slightly more progressive views, but that’s rare tbh))

Its just very noticeable that the majority of queer people, and between those especially aspecs because they do talk about non-romantic love the most, still don’t see sexual love as something that could just exist. It’s very noticeable when there’s hundreds of posts broadening the definition of love to include literally everything but specifically sexual love. Endless lists about what love is in non-romantic ways, and it’s glaringly obvious that people just do not believe anyone could care for someone they "just" want to fuck, "just" have a sexual relationship with, without wanting to be labelled as friends or anything similar even when they do things other see as friendship because they cannot grasp that people can care for their sexual partners even without having feelings for them that aren’t sexual.

Just still seems very sex-negative to limit sex to be something that either happens between people in a different kind of relationship (usually romantic, but again, some do agree you can have sex with friends, too), or something emotionless between strangers who then never interact with each other again (which is also most of the time treated as a bad thing which should stop).

Point is: Maybe question why you exclude sexual love specifically from your post about non-romantic love. (And at the same time, also stop acting like every person must experience some type of love)

[letters-to-lgbt-kids]

(Content “warning”, of sorts: unlike most of my posts, this isn’t intended as positivity or advice, it’s just a stream-of-consciousness piece of writing that I wanted to share) 

My dear lgbt+ kids, 

Every now and then, I receive a message like “Share this with your 5 favorite bloggers and ask them to share 5 fun facts about themselves” or get tagged in a post like “Share your favorite movie, song and book, and then tag your friends to do the same”. I read them, I smile and appreciate feeling included in those little games, and I log off without replying - and then I turn around and go „Oh, yeah, I guess I run a somewhat popular blog but people don’t really care about me, you know? I just, like, monologue to people about stuff and sometimes they read it but I as a person do not matter to anyone. I could be replaced by some robot and nobody would notice or even care.” 

As I’m typing this, I think that I could try to turn this into some general positivity and/or advice: on how people with a low self-esteem tend to dismiss signals that other people think highly of them, or on how small ���meaningless“ connections like some random internet stranger just thinking of you while forwarding a chain message aren’t so small or meaningless at all, or maybe on how “lonely” can sometimes become a self-identity that stands in our way of connecting to others. 

Or I could talk about how part of the reason I just briefly smile at these messages but do not reply to them is the (re-) emergence of the queerphobic, false rhetoric that “queer adults are much more likely to be pedophiles, so all of them should be treated like suspects at all times“ (statistically not true, btw, but since when do people care about facts when they could just share inflammatory lies?) and all the ways it makes it hard to be a queer content creator with a young audience (and also to just be a queer human being at this point). And how even typing this makes me worry someone will twist all this into me asking minors for comfort and if maybe I should rephrase it, and now I’m thinking how this need to constantly self-censor ourselves fucks with our mental health and contributes to the loneliness epidemic among queer men. But this is getting too heavy and I’m running out of space in this letter. 

Yeah, I could write about any of these things now. I could monologue about it and someone would read it and they might even comment “good point OP” and I would read that and smile. And for a brief moment, we would connect. The same way two strangers connect when one lets the other cut in line at the supermarket and the other says thankyou and they never even look at each other and this small moment will be forgotten in no time but for a brief second it made the world a touch kinder, and it means nothing and it means everything. 

With all my love, 

Your Tumblr Dad 

[hadesisqueer]

While many white people use their queerness/disabilities/etc as excuses to be fucking idiots and bigots and trying to get away with it because of their 'otherness' while ignoring the white privilege white people still have-- I swear to god, guys, putting "white" in front of another word doesn't make some comments any less queerphobic or sexist or ableist either.

Like if a white person is racist and using the "I'm disabled/queer/a woman" card trying to play the victim when they're called out on it? Yeah no dude. No justification. Shut the fuck up and stop trying to win the opression olympics.

But also idk again, the word "white" doesn't excuse homophobia either guys. Most of all if you're a white person too. You're just trying to sound woke while being homophobic. Which happens often. Very often.

[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

over the last 3 months i have seen myself called (and sometimes blocked for being assumed to be):

a racist/a bigot

homophobic/queerphobic/transphobic

ace/demi-phobic

a fascist

for expressing opinions such as "I found the characters and background stories in Veilguard weaker and less interesting than previous Dragon Age games" and "i miss the amount of tension and conflict that we used to get to explore with the player character depending on their in-game background and life history" and "i did not feel Lucanis' character and romance arc was fully satisfying while I was playing through it".

and since this all started we now have:

seen the entire DA staff laid off from Bioware

heard many now-former bioware devs talking about how toxic the workplace was during the development of DA4

seen allusions to Bioware/EA executives overriding plot/plans that the Dragon Age writers/devs would have preferred

extracted large amounts of cut content from the games that show things like increased emotional response range for Rook, or alternate endings for companion arcs (NOT concept art content, but actual written and even voice-recorded dialogue in the game files), or increased impact from decisions you could make in the game

IN ADDITION to what we ALREADY knew about how many times the game changed direction/leadership changed/the mid-process layoffs, etc.

so can we maybe not keep putting "people who come into the Dragon Age universe from a place of love and were ultimately disappointed with the latest installment" in the same trash bucket as "dudes on twitter who were mad there were trans/nonbinary characters in their AAA game". can we FUCKING as a community acknowledge that there are many reasons someone might not jive with a change in direction other than jumping to "they disagree with me so they must obviously be horrible people, whose opinions shouldn't be counted anyway" (<-if this is your first impulse maybe examine that also).

i am so tired and i am never gonna get an apology for any of it but NOW that a lot of the people who were posting/reblogging these sentiments are hearing/seeing all these other things add up. it's like suddenly now it's "acceptable" to have problems with aspect of Veilguard or want more from it, because the writers/devs have shown they probably did too during it's creation. whereas when I said these things right off the bat (because the only thing we had was the game we got. not the game we can pretend they wanted to make instead) it WASN'T because apparently expressing opinions on my personal tumblr counts as "being mean to/harassing devs who worked hard on the game" or, again, assumed I am a racist/bigot/facist/queerphobic.

you're allowed to still like Veilguard. it's fine i promise. you can love the game if you love it and my not loving it has nothing to do with your own relationship to this piece of media. i am happy there are people who truly can enjoy it without massive Caveats. but i am still seeing like 3-5 posts Per Week express those opinions and it is really destroying my love for the community i once enjoyed.

[maluron]

Julian Bashir likes Women and Yet is Not Straight; a manifesto.

aka: queerphobes fuck off.

gasp oh no not me vagueblogging about someone who pissed me off like a tired old petty fangull

but @snowflake_challenge suggested we wrote a manifesto; In your own space, write a promo, manifesto or primer for a beloved character, relationship or fandom.

so.

In the aftermath of December 12th. Reveling in canon Garashir. Making a couple celebrating shitposts that gain traction. And I get one stupid comment

"i wish bashir still liked women [sadface emoji]" 1) wow rude—ever heard of the fandom rule «don’t harsh my squee»? make your own post if you want to complain don’t spam mine; 2) bitch he does what are you yapping about??

So yeah here’s my manifesto. Julian Bashir Does indeed like Women (among other) and Yet is Not Straight.

His hologram ending married to a man does not invalidate that the template was a huge bisexual xenophile slut (affectionate) who liked women and at least one man and possibly others and fondling their feet (entirely canon) and possibly getting his ass smacked (personal fanon) (note: having a kink has not influence whatsoever on sexual orientation but pointing this out is likely to piss off heterosexist bigots, so)

I posit that Bashir’s attraction to Jadzia while very real was stemming out of Doylist comp-het [insert siddig "spark" interview https://www.tumblr.com/beechicory/772072920481742848] and was also in the Watsonian way not very gender-traditional. She’s a beautiful statuesque young woman who exsudes Gender Energy, she’s got several lifetimes of experience as both men and women, she can bodily pick him up and toss him and that’s what attracts him: no despite, because. If they’d been to fuck she would peg him and smack his bottom. [insert "not straight" siddig interview https://www.tumblr.com/nimue44/773490608390176768]

[insert robinson "i want to fuck him" interview https://www.tumblr.com/pajamasecrets/718997301079719936] The actors themselves have said time and again that Garak and Bashir had so much more chemistry together than any other pairing involving either. I’m not going to epilogue on that: there must be already so many garashir manifestos out there. It’s fact.

I’m personnally not a fan of Bashir’s relationship with Leeta; I’ll file it under comp-het again but I admit his feelings were real and won’t invalidate them.

(I can’t argue about Ezri and how it’s unhealthy because at this point I only have second-hand knowledge.)

What I’m saying is

this twink Cannot Sit Straight and exsudes Disaster Bi vibes; also neurodivergent vibes and that’s canon too but subject of another manifesto. (I’m not saying that looking like a twink makes you gay—but acting a certain way gives you higher odds of being Not Straight)

Also Star Trek is in The Future where people should be so very chill about identity and orientation—fuck Berman forever (I still need a link to that «in the 90ties everyone had to be straight» post please, can someone point me to it?) and every character should be assumed bi until proven otherwise. And Bashir has proven to love at least several women and one man! (again I’m not saying either Everyone Is Bi, period; lots of characters can still be attracted to only one gender and/or sex but a lack of shown attraction to the other is not the same as proof of absence—unless they explicitely state one strong preference)

Now the LWD Bashir married to Garak is a hologram. They could have forfeit programming any attraction in it and made him aro-ace but they didn’t. It’s only logical to assume they made him as bi/pan as his template. The hologram marrying One (1) Cardassian man does not make Bashir Just Gay And Not Attracted To Any Woman. It makes him attracted to at least one man and Prophets know how many other people or any and every and no gender before and/or on the side.

Regarding how the LWD alternates make Garashir canon I’m choosing the "soulmates" for lack of a better word, interpretation—it’s not that they were fated to be together but that in the Prime universe they could have been, they would have been, they shoud have been but circumstances conspired against them, and in another universe given the chance they totally do. [insert perfect choice post here https://www.tumblr.com/believethestars/770420215813177344] [insert Mac interview https://www.tumblr.com/wanderingwriter87/771121857095172096]

And now if you’re really a homophobic shit or if you just happen to have a different ship ie Bashir joins the O’Brien Polycule while Garak marries Parmak or whatever yes there are alternate universe versions yes one is a hologram so maybe not a perfect copy so you can still interpret original Prime Bashir however you want and blame the hologram’s actions on a fancy grown-beyond-their-programming accident.

But bemoaning that Woke made your fav character Not Het is not a good look. Queerphobia is never a good look. Doing so in an untrue fashion looks stupid and this one was stupidly biphobic. You’re allowed to not like a canon development but think long and hard about why exactly you don’t like it before you come spouting bigoted shit especially on someone else’s post.

Ok that manifesto was mainly just an excuse to collect Doctor Twink pictures because I love him. And his stupid lizard husband (affectionate). https://www.tumblr.com/see: smileyobrien/769842115232563200 https://www.tumblr.com/dreamerdrop/773084827961491456 They’re in love and I love them, Your Honor. Thank you for your attention.

(and queerphobia on my posts will still get you blocked)

[thestrangestthlng]

HOLY DOUBLE FUCKING DOWN BATMAN.

"Remember, this is not me backing down or being defensive." "Remember, this is not me apologizing?"

Babes, who are you talking to? Your little fucking friends who are just as problematic as you?

"Just because you were offended doesn't mean you were right."

Be so fucking for real right now. That is not for you to decide. You don't get to determine what is offensive to someone and say they're wrong. You do not get to tell people from communities that what they were offended by wasn't offensive. You do not get to determine whether or not someone else can be offended by your actions.

"I am not the creator of gay stereotypes."

No, you are not, but that doesn't not mean that you have to continue to give them life.

"they created it themselves." Re: stereotypes about queer hookup culture.

You do realize that straight people have a hook up culture, right? We'll get to that. Do you want to know why there are so many negative stereotypes about marginalized communities? I'll tell you. It's because of white supremacy culture and the patriarchy. White people in power made sure the seeds of these negative connotations were spread far and wide. Media creates those biases and creates the stereotype. Would you say the same thing about Black women and the Mammy and Sapphire stereotype? These are stereotypes that are mocked and negatively reinforced in culture for entertainment and oppression.

"Gay men, I'm sorry... [...] my bad, I thought that because gay men can joke about it, I can too."

It's not that you can't joke about it. The fact was it wasn't fucking funny and I will explain to you exactly why. When you are joking abut a marginalized community, or a demographic that you have a position of privilege over (which you do, as a bisexual woman) you have to PUNCH UP for the joke to be funny. You punched down, which made it an attack and not a joke.

"The hook up culture exists in every sexual orientation [...] so what are you even mad for."

It absolutely does exist with every sexual orientation, WHICH IS WHY YOU COULD HAVE LEFT OUT THAT WHOLE FUCKING PARAGRAPH WHERE YOU TALKED ABOUT GAY MEN ONLY BEING ABOUT THAT THING. (And I'm sure that you're not even old enough to get that reference.)

"The word "target" was part of the fun little dialogue I imagined in my head when I was explaining Tommy pov. It wasn't meant to be taken in a fun docu-series kinda way."

Just because it's not how you intended doesn't mean that isn't how it was received. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. You mocking this just really goes to show how ignorant you are.

"I'm bisexual."

Okay, and? The same way a gay man or a lesbian can be biphobic or make biphobic statements or actions, bisexual people can have queerphobic statements or actions. I explained this to you. Internalized phobias are a think too.

"Queer people are not untouchable."

No, they aren't. You can dislike queer characters, I know I dislike PLENTY. You can just be honest with yourself and be like "I don't like him because he's in the way of my ship." You don't have to prove anything you can just say you don't like him. You don't need to justify this, you can just be honest about it.

The problem is that the rhetoric that you are spewing is homophobic in nature. And when gay men and other queer people are telling you that it's offensive, it's offensive. You were explained to in detail why what you said was offensive, reductive, and dangerous. You just don't care. Your little friends are just in your ear backing you up.

Tommy is absolutely just a character. He will never see any of this shit, but people like him, will.

If after this, you still don't understand how you, a bisexual, can be homophobic or make homophonic actions, I don't know what to tell you.

[genericpuff]

(disclaimer, this is coming from a heartstopper fan! i love heartstopper this is not hate!!)

i think at least part of the annoyance with heartstopper isn't just that isn't a light fluffy ya series, it's also that its another example of how the queer media that gets the most mainstream attention tends to be this kind of light fluffy ya stuff that focuses on two conventially attractive queer boys or men and it also tends to be written by people who aren't queer men on top of that, so not only can it feel very samey but it can feel like other queer people are relegated to side characters in the stories of cis gay men. and as someone who loves heartstopper i get that on some level.

btw by "written by people who aren't queer men" NOT saying that isn't not written by queer people. alice oseman is genderfluid and aroace, becky albertalli is bisexual, etc. and while i think the point is still valid there is a misogyny element in that a lot of the focus is put on things that are written by women or people they perceive as women while tumblr darlings like good omens and ofmd (written by presumably straight men) don't get the same treatment.

nah y'know what, that's fair, I can get how frustrating it can be for a lot of popular queer stories to feel samey, I've definitely gotten BL-fatigue in the past on platforms like WT and Tapas because many of them ARE the same and feel like they're just piggybacking off trends for the sake of clout (and this is a problem in the heterocis romance stories too, don't get me fucking started on how dark romance has turned into torture porn where vulnerable women are constantly being victimized by rich powerful men and we're just supposed to root for that ??), but it's one of those things where like, what might be seen as just more corny shit could very well be the revelation another person needs that they're gay / trans / etc. that the story helped them realize. there's just a point where i see these arguments against cheesy popular queer stories that teeter dangerously close to being queerphobic and, as you said, misogynist, simply because "it was written by someone who i perceive as a woman so that makes it BAD!"

and I didn't mention it in the original post because I didn't want to @ OP in any way but in the comment section they literally said "i dont think heartstopper itself is all that bad but it has pretty much aimed the direction of all mainstream gay comics towards wholesomeness instead of anything more interesting so i want to destroy heartstopper to destroy heartstopper clones" and that gives me massive ick because it implies their sole reasoning for including it was "chill and happy queer stories bad, if a character doesn't suffer enough then they're not interesting"?? why can't LGBTQ+ audiences have more 'vanilla' stories that aren't all sad and angsty all the time? are we not entitled to the same corny romcom vanilla shit that the heterocis are entitled to? why do LGBTQ+ characters - and by extension, people - have to suffer to qualify as being 'interesting'? You're already interesting, you're you! like i'm sorry, are we trying to scare people straight??? 😭 shit, that's even a plot point that's touched on in Heartstopper itself where Nick is questioning his sexuality and he starts googling shit and it's just ALL the terrifying news stories of queer kids being ostracized / bullied / murdered / etc. and as much as it's important to be aware of the ongoing issues so we can keep fighting for our rights, we ALSO need to find balance and remember to celebrate the stories that AREN'T that because we need something to be hopeful for, something we can find peace in. I don't think Heartstopper is some deeply profound piece of work, but it also doesn't seem like it's trying to be? It's a low stakes celebration of the LGBTQ+ experience that's very warm and comforting, especially for those who are the same ages as the main characters who are often being persuaded by the grown-ups around them that it's a death sentence to be gay / trans / etc.

and it's not like we HAVEN'T had popular pieces of queer representative media that explored things outside of cheesy BL, like are we forgetting about Nimona which explored both the gay and genderfluid experience in a very accessible and fun way while still being mature and not pandering to its audience over how society has made monsters out of queer people?

(and even then I'm sure there are folks who would argue "actually, here are the issues with Nimona" , and that's fine tbh, we can like media and appreciate what it brings to the table while also discussing what it lacks in, such as what we're doing now with Heartstopper! progress is a never-ending journey!!)

and also okay, not me trying to be argumentative in the slightest BUT I don't really get the argument that 'other queer people' are being sidelined for the main characters? unless there's something I'm missing here lol (I will apologize for that because it's admittedly been a while since I've re-read Heartstopper so I should probably go do that to refresh myself on it). like i say that in the sense that Heartstopper is clearly meant to be about two gay male teenagers. just like how Nimona is about a shapeshifter who is not a girl or a boy (they're Nimona!) and a gay man who are both trying to change the system that's other'd them for years for the better. that is the story Heartstopper is trying to tell and it achieves that. it also has a trans character plotline that I could see people arguing feels sidelined but I think there's a massive difference between 'sidelining' and just having a B plot ? my honest take with that is not every piece of representative media is going to be able to cover every single topic, it's just not doable for one piece of media to be a monolith for everything, the same as how one person can't be a monolith for an entire community of people. BUT that doesn't mean works like Heartstopper and Nimona can't inspire others to also lend their voices into the medium and create that representation that's needed. That's why we need ✨variety✨ and Heartstopper is part of that variety by offering a more vanilla cutesy story full of good vibes for people who want that sort of thing.

IDK, I think there's just a lot of nuance that's being missed in that poll, and in the difference between Heartstopper inspiring more people to write happy cozy BL stories vs. implying that it's had an actual negative influence on modern art and media in the same way that series like Homestuck and LO have to the point that people think it needs to be destroyed, like wtf LOL Like they're not even comparable IMO and a lot of the arguments I see people making about why it is just feel a little backwards, and those arguments obfuscate the real issue which is just "popular thing is popular and people like to piggyback off popular shit". That's a fact for basically any niche and genre, these trends come and go. Even if the whole cutesy BL trend passes one day (which it will) it'll be replaced by something else that people will also inevitably find samey and boring after a while. This is not a concept that's unique to LGBTQ+ media, it's universal.

Balance is important and I think finding that balance is as much a responsibility on the shoulders of the consumer as it is on the creator. And I don't think Heartstopper deserves to be put into the same camp as stories like LO which literally straightwashes its canonically queer characters and gives those queer identities to nothingburger characters who are easy to shoo out of the plot to make way for the heterocis ones (while still parading itself around like it's actually 'queer rep' which... it really isn't.) Like all three of the comics in that poll are vastly different, serving different audiences, with different goals and intentions. It's comparing apples to oranges to pineapples.

The worst Heartstopper has to offer is just a low stakes plot that might not appeal to everyone or feel 'samey' which yeah, valid, but in the grander sense of whether or not it's had a negative effect on queer media just for being... cheesy? And inspiring other people to write stories like it? I don't get the argument, it feels like it's severely missing the point of what we're fighting for here - to live happy little unbothered lives - but that's just me ╮(￣ω￣;)╭ I'm definitely not trying to be a dick about it in any way and I don't want anyone to think I'm not open to the opposing points here, I do agree with you on the oversaturation of samey BL stories, but it just rose some massive red flags to see Heartstopper next to frigging Homestuck and Lore Olympus LOL

[wenellyb]

Eddie Diaz is a white Latino. Did people learn nothing from the Pedro Pascal discourse? And does the fandom *not* remember that episode where the funeral protestor refuses to be tended by Hen and Chim, so he asks Eddie to give him care— fully seeing he’s white— until Eddie says his last name is Diaz and his father’s Mexican, but he can channel his mother’s Swedish heritage for the man’s comfort? White people are not members of the global majority, but they do live and exist outside Western Europe and the U.S. (like Mexico).

It’s so weird how parts of the fandom are making any positive reaction to a m/m relationship in this show (that isn’t their yaoi ‘buddie’ fanfiction) into something about loving to see white men kiss. Y’all would still be getting that with canon buddie! Y’all couldn’t even support Michael and Glenn (calling them “homewreckers”). Y’all constantly ignore Hen and Karen with your complaints of “queerbaiting.” Y’all also called TK & Carlos’ (911 Lone Star) relationship “toxic” because it began with sex and because y’all fanon Carlos as some aggressive control freak. Like… c’mon!

I don’t think anyone who is supportive of Buck’s new relationship is arguing that Tommy is perfect. He’s was a fucking dick to both Hen and Chim when they joined the 118. His “delivery man” comment to Chim was wildly unacceptable. No one has forgotten this. Yet both Hen and Chim are *NOW* good friends with him…? Why? He changed. And the show shows the audience this. They show that he developed a great camaraderie with Hen and Chim. They show how he— unlike Sal and Gerrard— shifted his behavior and worldview to accept, embrace, and enjoy change.

Tommy could have been Sal. He could have been Gerrard. He had a good working relationship with both men and both men encouraged bad behavior in the 118. Yet he didn’t. He stayed on and befriended Hen and Chim (when most of the other guys still refused). Because he chose to learn and change and open himself to people’s differences (which likely also helped him come to terms with his own “differences”).

Tommy’s arc is meant to show how someone can make amends, repair relationships, and become a better person (y’know… learn, grow, and reform himself). The general audience for this show is straight and white. They *need* to see white people changing and learning to be better. They *need* to see queer people coming into themselves. These are important story lines.

Fans like Buck and Tommy together because they like Buck and Tommy together, because they like what this means for them and what might happen going forward. That’s literally it. We’re all just overjoyed by having more queer representation, including Bi representation. That’s it.

But there are a lot of “buddie” shippers in people’s inboxes hating on Buck and Tommy together for no reason other than it stands in the way of their ideal porn fantasies (“buddie”). And they’re being weirdly queerphobic about it, too.

Hi Anon!!!! So much to unpack here. I'll post this and let anyone comment their thoughts because this is an interesting conversation.

I'll start by saying that it never occurred to me that Ryan Guzman was not White, until Bucktommy became more popular and some Buddie shippers said that Bucktommy shippers were preferring the White MM pairing and I was like "Hmm.... both Buddie and Bucktommy are White MM pairings"???? Like it never even occured to me.

I'm not here to debate Ryan Guzman's ethnicity, he knows that better than us, but as you mentionned people seem to forget that there are White latinos.

I should add that Americans will maybe have a different perspective but in Europe, there is racism, and there is also xenophobia both are bad, but not the same.

If I'm talking about someone who is White and Latino being a victim of prejudice, I would never say that they're victim of racism, I would say that he's victim of xenophobia.

Believe it or not there are a lot of Europeans are xenophobic but not racist and vice versa.

With that being said, I agree with the rest of your ask..

I love 911 Lone Star and watched 911 casually but I never got the Buddie shippers, especially the ones who said they shipped Buddie as a form of activism, or because there was a lack of Queer representation (which is true) but Henren are there, TK and Carlos are right there and it's the same franchise.

They never cared about Henren, they even erased them whenever they accused the show of Queerbaiting even thought it has several Queer characters.

I remember when they started complaining that Bucktommy had more fics that Henren after one kiss.... but never said anything about Buddie having over 20 000 fics after 6 years of nothing even thought Henren was canon.

A lot of their takes are rooted in hypocrisy, it's like they're taking all the arguments that have been thrown at them and throwing them back at Bucktommy shippers without even thinking about it.

It's very important to have discussion about fandom racism, because it's a huge issue especially in the biggest fandoms but I do feel like some of them are bringing the issue in bad faith. This discussion is so important but it needs to be had with the Bucktommy fandom AND the Buddie fandom. So far the Buddie shippers only want the Bucktommy shippers to have it.

Why don't they take a look at the mirror first and ask themselves why they never cared about a Black Lesbian couple when one of them was a Main Character. Why don't they ask themselves why a ship with 2 best friends has over 20000 fics and a canon ship that is TK and Carlos only have 7000.

And why do they find the weirdest excuses to hate on Carlos (as you said), who's clearly not White and never give him the same courtesy they give their fave White chatacters.

When Buddie shippers talk about fandom racism, all I can think is: the call is coming from inside the house.

[olderthannetfic]

Here's a lukewarm take. I'm a queer woman, so many of the influencers I get recommended are also queer women or queer afabs -I've noticed the pattern- and just, too many influencers get to be the most racist wastes of spaces in the world, but as long as they girlboss they just get to keep on trucking. At first I'd just ignore these people, but then I just kinda took a deep dive, and these people are literally the same. Bonus points for hiding behind an identity marker. Some of them hide behind their queerness, some of them hide behind being poc, some behind being ND or disabled, but all in all, none of these things are a reason to be racist, or any other type of -phobic. The racism was just what I noticed over the past few months, years...

It's so fucked up how I see these posts about how much cunt these people are serving #queer afab influencer, while being a racist pile of shit all out in the open, or even just queerphobe in some way. There's also this one trend I noticed where the rabbit hole opens up to the poc speaks on poc issues, which doen't even apply to that specific poc. So purple person talks on how grey and green people have strife, but so clearly speaks from a complete spot of misinformation, but because purple is also "technically" a poc, people just keep on praising and singing for these dumbass influencers. Bonus: Purple talks over the voices of the actually affected grey and greens.

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Welcome to influencers.

[bunny-jpeg]

crying about how people sent you homophobic and transphobic slurs but you were calling women bitches and when i sent you that you didnt answer. i know you wont answer this either but you're such a hypocrite. there was nothing wrong when you A GUY calling women BITCHES but when women gave the same energy to you by calling you slurs just like you did, you're starting to crying about them. go on answer this but i know you wont.

hey sweetheart. i don't know if this is some weird rage bait, so i'm not going to react with hate or malice. i'm not even going to call you the b-word that you so much hate so much.

fair, you got me. maybe i shouldn't have the b-word so much when referring to the skinny ladies of formula one fan fiction. what started out as a little jest went a little too far. but by fucking god get a grip, honey, me calling skinny women b-words in a post critiquing how some of ya'll can't think outside the box isn't an excuse to have mask-off queerphobia. and the fact that you think having someone call me a faggot or a tranny is acceptable says more about your character than mine. the fact that you've messages me twice about this and are baiting for some kind of response is honestly pathetic. and doesn't help the "formula one is a toxic fandom" allegations. i made a post that wasn't supposed to be taken serious that some of ya'll took too serious so i now have to take it serious. because hate to break it to ya sweetheart, being called a faggot so many times by many different little anon trolls like you is a bit annoying. i wasn't crying or anything, just find it reallllly fucking annoying. because you little anons are, can't even get off of it to address me or even address the contents of my post.

i'm sorry that you're so hung-up over a word rather than the contents of my post. that it's not fair to other groups that social media aus are kind of bland. and you can't think of an proper response as to why that is happening so you're basically white knuckling the use of the b-word. i bet you were chomping at the bit, but just like social media aus you couldn't think of a creative way to call me a queerphobic slur. so instead you're staked outside my inbox demanding a response for an issue that had already passed. honestly i'm honoured that you want me to talk to you so badly, to know whyyyy i said those words. and honestly, it was a just a little laugh. a little jest as i said. so i got one better for you anon, you're a hateful. you're crude. you're honestly annoying. but you're not a "b-word" so at least there's that. alright?

i just hope that outside the information highway and tumblr.com, you're a little more compassionate towards your queer friends (if you have any, you seem like you're not fun at parties) or do you pick apart anytime they said something off-colour in order to make yourself the more oppressed person in the room? i hope you have a fantastic start to your weekend and since you love my words so much, why don't you read a few of my fan fics on the way out <3