#;; because im not trying hard enough
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For all my fellow ADHD and soft voice-havers when we get interrupted/can't say anything constantly
#bro having conversations is so hard#i swear my voice is literally at the perfect frequency to make it barely audible to anyone without superhuman hearing or smthn#the amount of times no one hears what im trying to say#so i cant interrupt because im not loud enough and i also cant TALK OVER people because overlapping words is#like the perfect recipe for a sensory overload/autistic shutdown
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Do yourself a favor and go read the entire fanfic work of @fanfoolishness
(In order: Under sun and shade, Blind Side, and Breathless (patching up is one of my fav too, I just had no cool sketch idea for it)
#star wars#star wars the bad batch#the bad batch fanart#tbb fanart#tbb fanfiction#dumping my “fanfic_doodles.clip” file here literally#sorry the style is messy#now I see them all Im like “ok it's all over the place zero/100 aesthetically pleasuring post”#hhhh its the thought that counts?#And tbh the point is just to convince you to read theses#because I'm like OBSSEEESSED with theses since you appeared in my notes#Every fic is gold#Me baiting my followers with pretty enough pictures to read fanfics#this being said I should really take the time to color properly my stuff#but I don't liiiiiiiiike it#there is tons of more talented artists if people want colored beautiful amazing art#me I can't really make my “”“spontaneous”“” “”“doodles”“” pretty without trying hard and at the end it's meh#They're so flat too#yesterday I was like “oh my scenes are becoming less flat I improved maybe”#Then I scrolled on my storyboard insta and was like#yeah sure no#I'm still faaaaaar away from the industry standards#I studied like at three arts school and I'm still bad at drawing TAT#why is my brain not working v_v#look brain I'm showing you nice pictures learn from them#brain: no Im gonna overfixate on this left hand here and only this#anyway
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Okay but does Peri KNOW that Dev has a robotic leg when he shows up? Something about the fact that Peri's wand is a cane and the fact that Dev could have kept his leg and just had a cane for the rest of his life instead tickles my brain.
I mean he doesn't know immediately, he wasn't like briefed or anything, but he basically lives in Dev's house so he definitely finds out. Peri doesn't comment on or react to it all though really, there's no reason for him to think anything of it, plenty of people have missing limbs, a lot of people are born without them, it doesn't necessarily mean anything sinister happened. He had no reason to pry or ask and I think Peri's lack of reaction to it helped Dev feel a bit more comfortable in his skin. (Not by much but.. a little bit.)
#fop#fairly oddparents#fop a new wish#fop dev#dev dimmadome#dale dimmadome#fop dale#fop Nature AU#<- I might rename it to something else idk give me ideas#LITERALLY thinking about the ableism implications of my AU so hard#Dale doesn't even stop to think that his son might not want a prosthetic leg#(Within the context of the AU the technology is good enough its basically indistinguishable from a real leg aside from lack of sensation)#he's basically deciding FOR his son that having his leg fully replaced would be better than living with a mild disability#After being the cause of that disability!! Double traumatization whammy!#If he stopped even for a second to ask Dev what he wanted he'd have learned that this was absolutely not it!#Half the reason Dev is so secretive is because he thinks being visibly disabled is showing weakness and is some terrible thing#You need accommodations right now man!!! Tell people what you need!!#Dale doesn't actually care all that much about people knowing about the prosthetic leg as long as Dev is quiet about the cause#and doesn't make him look bad#tbh he's kinda proud of the prosthetic leg. Im sure half the reason he was so eager to push it onto his son was because his own company mad#it and wanted to try it out#I have so many thoughts this is getting so long
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charli xcx's critically-acclaimed album BRAT (2024) is something that can actually be so dan howell-coded
#-if you have phannie brainrot and feel the need to associate everything with dnp in some way 🤪#also hi again gang. was MIA for a few days being an academic victim#(will not be graduating this year despite my best efforts. but it's okay because there's still shipping phan <3)#anyway now back to suffering. trying to salvage what's left of this academic year 🤪🤪#phan#dan and phil#dnp#dan howell#daniel howell#are we using dan or daniel for the tag lmao#also im probably posting this at an awful time but it's been rattling around in my head for a few days so here it is#i wanted to use a screenshot from BIG from the part where he talks about his suicide attempt. but#i am literally not in the right headspace to watch that part rn.. like i cant cope with seeing him saying he tried to kill himself atm#watching the childhood bullying part was hard enough right now so i'll leave it at that 😭
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Julian and Keiko headcanons because Keiko gets sidelined so much and deserves the world and I wish we got to see them interact more
when they get stumped on their respective projects, they'll do late night work sessions together and bounce their research off each other to see if the other can help them figure out where the problem is. they'll do this in person when theyre both on the station, but also over call if one of them is away, and after the O'Briens move back to Earth
they edit each other's papers (Keiko marvels at Julian's ability to spell out complex chemical compounds with his eyes closed, and somehow use 'their' instead of 'there') (in his defense he wrote that bit at 4 in the morning after going 2 straight days without sleep) (she threatens to sedate him)
Julian sometimes brings back plants from planets they explore in the Gamma Quadrant and gives them to Keiko. sometimes he does it because the plant has medicinal properties and the two of them can do a joint research project, but most of the time he does it just to give her a nice gift
when Miles goes away for particularly dangerous missions, Julian will keep Keiko company and help keep her mind off of it. sometimes she has trouble sleeping because shes so worried, so he'll hang around and start rambling on about whatever he's currently working on until she falls asleep. he jokes he's boring her to sleep, but it actually means a lot to her
they have a weekly tea date. this is their prime gossip time. sometimes Jadzia is invited
when Keiko's mad at Miles she'll rant to Julian about it. Julian learned very quickly that this is not a time where advice is wanted, so he sits back and lets her get it all off her chest, because she really just wants someone to listen and let her blow off some steam
Julian makes a concentrated effort to learn more about plant husbandry and care after the incident where he accidentally killed some of Keiko's prized plants because he actually does feel very bad about it
Julian hovered over Keiko nearly as bad as Miles did when she was pregnant with Kirayoshi (and then he hovered over her even more after the pregnancy transfer, and he wouldnt tell anybody why, but Keiko knew it was because nearly losing her shook him up pretty bad)
when Julian gets outed for being augmented, Keiko goes to him and gives him the tightest, warmest hug he's ever gotten in his entire life
Julian gets invited to girls nights with Keiko and Molly (steady surgeon's hands make him the best one to paint nails) (he pretends to complain but he loves it)
anytime Julian has to go away for a scientific conference of any kind, if he gets to bring someone with him, his first choice is always Keiko
in short: theyre besties they told me so themselves <3
#star trek: ds9#julian bashir#keiko o'brien#seriously theyre both scientists you can do so much with JUST that#you cant tell me they havent helped each other reach breakthroughs in their research#Keiko brings Julian a couple plants that can be used to help make a vaccine because she read his research and recognized what he needed#Julian gets so excited he picks Keiko up and spins her around and calls her a genius and kisses her on the cheek#another time Julian is reading through Keiko's research on an endangered tree shes trying to keep alive and struggling#and he realizes he can synthesize something in his lab that will help#and Keiko hugs him so hard she nearly takes him to the floor#I know in my heart theyre besties#well. im an O'Brien polycule truther but I wanted to focus on Keiko#because Keiko doesnt get enough love
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is this your card? ♦️♣️♥️♠️ it isnt but you dont wanna hurt his feelings
#this was supposed to be a warmup but i got carried away.... i havent drawn in so long that its been hard to focus orz#im testing a new brush for fun. again.. i think i can use this for clean lineart..?? im surprised i went as long as i did with the#narinder brush honestly... but i wanna try something new so here we are again#if i could get my shit together id love to draw a model of his van because i have smth really cool in mind..i was looking at pictures#of old wooden caravans like the horse drawn ones and i wonder if i could combine that with the shape of an RV#i like the ones with a door at the rear bc it kinda lookslike a train caboose.. maybe he'd get someone to weld him a custom ride!!#idk how intricate and detailed i can design it without making it a pain in the ass to draw every time BUT i have a general idea#it would probably have a door on the side but idk if itd flip down to make a stage or upwards to make a roof?? and then theres a#curtain behind it where he would come out and do his show methinks.. ive been looking at pictures of camping vans on pinterest for ideas#i dont think he LIVES in the van since i mentioned his home is an old run down theatre when he isnt on the road. i wanna draw that too#but the RV should have enough for long travels like a bed and cabinets..? maybe a net hanging on the ceiling where all his props go#id like to think of ideas for a hometown.. toronto has a huge entertainment district so it would make sense for him to live there#although id also love to base parts of it from vancouver since id love to go back and visit </3#..would there be furth names for those places?? nyancouver... clawronto... whinnypeg (like a horse whinny)...#pawson creek.... purrlington... otterwa.. i love coming up with names lol#my art#myart#my oc#oc#sleight#laikas comet oc#fan character#fur#furry art
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My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)
When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.
She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.
She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.
She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.
...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.
Remember this line?
You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:
Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?
...YEP. 😈 (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)
As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.
She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.
I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.
...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.
I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.
And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.
She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.
During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.
She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.
But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.
Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.
...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?
But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.
If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.
I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.
She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.
Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.
So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.
She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.
For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.
She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.
But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.
If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.
But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.
He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.
He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)
She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.
He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.
Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.
They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.
None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.
It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.
Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.
She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.
She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...
She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.
I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.
How much he loves her.
And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.
Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.
It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.
She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.
I feel like this moment here...
-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.
Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.
And it's all thanks to Sonic.
If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.
Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.
He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.
Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.
Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.
They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.
"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"
"Wouldn't dream of it."
#piko rambles#sonic the hedgehog#amy rose#Meant to be platonic but I don't care if you tag as ship lol#I've been meaning to post something like this for the longest time now but never really got into posting it-#-because you guys REALLY hate seeing these two together for some reason.#Well not for SOME reason. There are valid reasons why you don't ship them. Everyone has valid reason why they don't ship this or that.#But sometimes those reasons can just sound so petty to me. Like the reason why is because Amy is a stalker or Sonic hates her which is FALS#Also those age gap arguments are understandable but so goddamn annoying sometimes. Maybe when they hit their late teens or early twenties-#then they can be together if they want to. Besides a good percentage of Sonic ships are better off if they waited til they're old enough im#I love them regardless of whether they're just friends or an awkward older cringe fail couple lmao#But them being just friends and hiding away all their emotions towards each other just to keep them safe and happy with them- 😭😭😭#Son/adow is my favorite ship of all time and sonamy is my favorite childhood ship/platonic ship because they both have one thing in common.#ANGST 😀#I've been thinking about Sonic and Amy's dynamic as of late and MAN-#Mixed with some personal headcanons of mine and their dynamic as of late just makes me so emotional.#Sonic and Amy have gotten so close now and it's so sweet but so heartbreaking at the same time when you think about it.#I'm so happy they are getting along better and being there for each other but there is so much to dissect here. So much to think about.#I might be a little silly but Amy losing her parents and being alone for so long and being the reason why she's always hanging onto Sonic-#-explains SOOOOOOOOO much about her. At least that's my headcanon for WHY that is.#Amy with abandonment issues speaks to me on a personal level. I'm always afraid of being forgotten or left behind by my family.#I sometimes feel like I'm not good enough no matter how hard I try. I do not blame Amy. I relate to her a lot. It's one of the many reasons#-why Amy is my favorite character besides Sonic and Shadow.#She fights hard to prove she's a valuable member of the team and hates getting left behind but despite all that she wasn't afraid to-#-express herself and her love for people. But after the Eggman War there was some changes that made her less expressive about her love.#Yeah she still loves Sonic but she doesn't admit it because none of that matters anymore and she thought that not being loved by Sonic#-is better than being loved since she nearly wasted her life loving someone who she thought has constantly bothered. 🥲#But I think after TMoStH I think she'll be less afraid of being expressive about it. She and Sonic are just so caring for each other 😭#I love these two way too much that when I think about them for too long I'll start SOBBING 😭😭 I'M EVEN SOBBING RIGHT NOW LMAO
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can i be fr for a minute?? sending abuse to people online for holding different views than you is not activism and in fact actively hurts your cause. most people are not extreme in their viewpoints, you can give them a new perspective if you're willing to spend some time explaining shit. if someone is saying something you disagree with and you rush in there to condescend to them and call them disgusting and subhuman and dont even TRY to explain calmly why their views are harmful, they're going to shut you out instantly and double down on their views.
most people are simply genuinely ignorant to the issues they're talking about - they just pick their views up from the news and the world around them and express opinions because that's what every person does. if you run in there and tell them they're scum for it, what then? if someone does that to you, are you going to think "maybe i should do some research" or are you going to think "this person is an asshole, im blocking them." a lot of you think you're activists and then refuse to do any kind of actual WORK to support your cause.
#this is not about the isr*el thing even tho thats obviously a huge issue rn#its just a pattern ive observed online#im not saying you have to be kind to people who oppress you dont twist my words#but if youre trying to support any cause and you think calling people names is going to help#youre a fucking idiot lol#people call themelves activists and pro-X cause because they called their opposition dirty c*nts online#how the hell is that meant to help anyone? theyre just going to retreat into their propaganda chambers because you proved what the leaders#of those spaces have been telling them#you can obvs block people if you dont want to deal w them but thats a neutral action. sending abuse harms ur cause.#text#like educating ignorant people is hard work! yeah! its also the entire fucking point of activisim#and if you think its too much effort then just stop pretending you give a shit tbh#like my parents managed to change our neighbour's very xenophobic stance on migrants with a calm conversation#some people will listen and some wont and shes not exactly going out to protests for migrants rights but shes not hostile anymore#and a lot of yall think that isnt good enough but let me tell you it IS good because these things take time!#unlearning things is MUCH harder than learning them in the first place and a lot of people grew up in environments that taught them#very discriminatory and conservative views and its actually not their fault. and its hard to educate yourself differently on something you#have no idea is not true. where do you start w that?
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Small snippet of Mother Earth and Her Infinite Sky (preview) by @silverjirachi ! Admittedly very compressed down to fit into a single page. But still!
#i really missed drawing them HELP all the new content being provided has been great motivation and inspiration#also why did i draw teen max w freckles but here w none well i am a firm believer in max foundatining them away when hes older#also i like changing up how i draw them when im not drawing my personal versions for them but it is so much easier w archie then w max#admittedly because my archie is further removed from canon#so i guess maxes only difference here is that he has his godforsaken oras glasses#i made my post oras designs for them solely to get rid of his horse blinders KJHKAJDHF theyre such a pain to draw#hardenshipping#i am going to post this and i will surely notice a typo right after this. but you know what. i will simply have to cope#quality is a little all over the place in general im just trying to refind my footing#drwaings been hard lately#or . non pixel fusions at least. trying to refind my style a little#thats enough of a tag ramble for one post
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Ummm!! So i went on a little trip with my family to some mountains nearby, this June,,, and i took some pictures of the scenery i felt that were very aesthetic ! (Atleast to me, because i LOVE taking pictures of a beautiful sky) So, i felt it would be a waste to NOT share some of my favourites with you guys :D
Heres some of the scenery from Pakistan , brought to you by your very own Mun! :-
(This one is my ABSOLUTE favourite ajsnfikridhj because there was a sudden blackout when i snapped this, which makes it look like this came straight out of a horror movie! Haha)
(Mid-Drive smudge but atleast we captured the sunset!)
(and idk but i felt like having just the moon shining your path at night has a vibe of its own. I like that vibe, it's very nostalgic for me)
(Tumblr is making them look grainier ;_; oh)
#photography#Pakistan#Mountains#Aesthetic#photos#ooc#i was feeling very proud of these that my dad suggested i share these on the internet#therefore i am!#funfact on this trip i nearly lost my thumb#because it got struck by the spinning blades of a drone while i was trying to help land it xD haha#suffice to say some of my blood is splattered onna wooden bridge somewhere in the mountains of Pakistan because my finger was FRCKED#but luckily i pressed on it hard immediately so it recovered eventually#i think by sharing this i share a bit of myself with you guys which kinda feels really nice and i know im not the best photographer out-#-there but yeah its still special to me because i captured them :) and i lived them!#by the way i have received a rather long but SUCH. a. NICE. ask on here that i want to answer immediately but I can't :'(#i want to draw Umer thanking the asker but I can't draw it roght now as I'm busy#but if the sender is reading this please know your words have reached me and i will respond to you soon enough hopefully!! much love to u#bye bye for now~
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#rgg#ryu ga gotoku#yakuza series#ryu ga gotoku 7#yakuza like a dragon#yakuza 7#ryo aoki#masato arakawa#snap sketches#tumblr is kicking the SHIT out of the full outfit pic jesus CHRIST#anyway hi im up to date on my comm schedule so free doodle for me#i came to the quick conclusion ive never even ATTEMPTED a casual outfit for aoki so. lol.#never too casual though but at least the tops undone#trying to draw aoki in different clothes is hard because i end up making him look. Not 42 and thats not what i want#(not) sorry governor youre never beating the baby face allegations#i legally couldnt Not add a necklace and ONE ring I LEGALLY HAD TO#idek how i totally feel but its good enough for a scribble#mk bye i think im making eggs at 9PM idk#no im lying im making pork rice ball
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Hiiiii mecha sonic. What is the coolest trick you know? Can you demonstrate
<THERE IS NOTHING AROUND HERE ON WHICH I WISH TO DEMONSTRATE, THOUGH, AND I TRUST YOU DO NOT WANT A LIVE EXAMPLE…>
#i waffled on this one for a really long time because i was trying to find a better answer than#'yeah i can explode people if i kick them hard enough'. but it ended up not happening so im just getting it out there now#instead this one became mostly just an excuse to draw him w/ his whole shit open. can your precious metal sonic do THIS#mecha sonic#sonic fanart#aslo yeah theres too much text in this one. its ok. dont @ me about whatevers going on with the speech bubbles in the second one#msab#sonicposting#off-art
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Hi y'all, I just wanted to talk a little about the behind the scenes of what I've been up to, to give y'all a little transparency and to open myself up for any tips or input! 🙏 Thank you for your continued support and for taking the time to look at my art 🫶
First and foremost I wanted to give some transparency about my art capacity.
As og followers may remember, I started this blog when I was doing art full time. Eventually my living expenses grew and I had to go back to work. I find myself in a cycle of "I'll make more art soon, once I get a job!" And "I'll make more art soon, once I am done with this job!" I lost my most recent job suddenly, having had an extension waved over my head until the last day(October 7th). Now I'm excited to have more time for art, but I am also feeling a rush to get a new job ASAP as I've been living paycheck to paycheck. I dream of doing this work full time, I'm just scared it's not quite there yet and I worry that I come off as scammy or dishonest when I anticipate more stability around the corner.
Second, I've been struggling with the Patreon. It's taken me a while to come to terms with this, but from what I've seen Patreon is not intuitive at all from the creator end. It doesn't do a good job of organizing addresses, emails, showing who or who isn't subscribed to me, or organizing and displaying the work I put on there. I've been really shocked by this experience, since lots of big names use Patreon. It's been a great way to streamline support, but it's been unhelpful in every other regard. I would like to continue using it, but I will most likely post more wips or process videos there in the future.
Which brings me to my third point, zines. I love making zines so much, it feels personal and fulfilling and fun! However the Patreon issues make it harder to keep information in order about where to send zines, or even where to message folks about them. In addition to this, the post office has been a big barrier to me, oftentimes only being open at the same time as my dayjob. Making zines can take days, then sending them out is a whole other monster.
This work is so important to me. Drawing peoples fantasies, representing body types, creating work around sexuality and the human experience feels like what I'm meant to do. I've made comics since I was a kid. This is the dream to me. The friends I've been able to make through this work are so important to me, and the conversations have been invaluable. Not to mention fun! I wanna doodle, I wanna draw hot stuff, I wanna thirst over these dudes! I want to play!
But I also just want to be transparent about the barriers I'm working around to share that experience. I'm completely self taught, both in art AND in running shops, building websites, running 8 accounts, etc. I take a lot of time to learn the logistics of these things, and try to make them make sense for my relationship with y'all (I do not want to paywall my art!! I don't want to!!!). This year my desktop broke down (the main one I use for all paintings and digital art). I've paused my Etsy shops and my Patreon to try to catch up with things. Trying to learn to paint in a completely different program. Then lost my job with no savings.
At the end of the day I don't want anything to come between me sharing my art with you. I wish I could doodle a thing, take a picture, and post it here. No third party site, no shop, no subscription. Just sharing my art with you. I promise I'm trying to figure out how to stay as close to that as possible, and I want to thank y'all for sticking with me as I untangle all of that.
So, what can you expect in the near future?
I'm working on a couple of painting commissions right now, which you should be able to see in the next couple of days! I want to catch up on kinktober and get those posted as well. There's a comic commission in progress which I'm very eager to work on, and which I think y'all will be excited for! To ease the weight of the Patreon I think I may do less zines/polls there and more wips and process videos! If possible, I want to do more full colored work too.
Thank you again for enjoying my work, and if you have any input or tips my inbox is always open 🙏🫶💕
#long post#info#marco lore#i wish i had time to edit this and make it nice#i just wanted to be open with yall about how much work this takes and that im trying to make it more doable#i don't want to overpromise stuff with patreon or shops and if im late sending stuff i never ever want it to come off as intentional or mali#malicious or as a scam#im just trying very hard to like ...survive. financially. and then trying to make all the logistics of thos big machine work. and then keep#up with commissions and shops and printing and mailing#god i wish i had employees but jts just me#i hand draw everything and then post it here to the word press to the ig and crop and caption and tag#then to the Patreon if it makes sense to or to the tiktok back in the day#and the formatting is all different#and i get messages across all of these platforms and I'm trying to learn a new way of painting on the fly#on top of that im supposed to be running my two Etsy shops too which im not right now because..broadly gestures#my nervous system can only take losing a job so often. the rug was really pulled feom under me in this one. i thought id have more time#i don't want to sound like I'm whining and i don't want to give up on all of this#i want to be very very very clear that art is what i love and who i am and what i want to do#i want to be posting on the daily again#i just need to evaluate what that looks like everytime life changes#I'm seriously so grateful for those of y'all that have joined the Patreon or bought stuff from the shop i really don't mean to drop the ball#so many times#y'all have literally been the difference between me making rent or not and I'm so worried that i don't make enough art to give back to that#relationship#im trying my best#okay anyways im posting this
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THANKS @kimdokjafan you are so kind and generous. ok im cashing in the first of three blank checks to talk about faith trust and pixie dust (most recent chatfic) because the last two directors commentaries were too serious so let's do a silly one.
some p5r spoilers, and this is mostly about sumire, and it's long again. do i need to keep disclaiming that these are long? you should know me by now.
i had this written for a while before i started formatting it because i wasn't really sure if i should post it? i feel like silly chatfic is something people go to for predominantly lighthearted nonsense so i was like, maybe there's too much plot and dramatic misunderstanding and i should just keep this one for myself. but then i was like well nothing matters and maybe someone will have fun with it. it's kind of terrible how much fully or mostly completed fic there is my docs that just doesn't see the light of day lol. write for yourself etc but i like sharing! too bad it comes with the mortifying ordeal etc. anyway that was a tangent
potato counter is a neopets game. there's no deep lore i just like neopets. i guess in this universe ryuji doesn't play neopets? or maybe he's just never played potato counter specifically. i also have a different fic where ryuji DOES play neopets. it's about neopets and ryuji and goro talking on neopets.
i think this might literally be the first time ive written sumi in a fic because i haven't actually written that much fic for royal, like, now that im looking, literally almost none? and none that had a group dynamic. so it was kind of fun to find her voice for the first time in a silly groupchat like this. i was worried people would find her exclamation marks annoying but i personally thought it was endearing so i added it in there.
every time i do a gag where a character corrects their own typo i have to code more stupid little bubbles to make it happen but i think it's worth it. all the effort that goes into making tgis look as much like a real chat as possible
this obviously doesnt take place in the canon p5/r universe, but im imagining sort of a postcanon sumi personality where she's more comfortable being herself and isn't borrowing kasumi's brand of confidence, but she's visibly a really anxious person without that kasumi veneer. i also think in this universe sumire is a fairly recent addition to the friend group, and while everyone likes her a lot and she really likes them, i kind of wanted to emphasise that feeling of being in a friend group where everyone's established and you're sort of a plus-one? you don't really fit yet. part of that is her being new, part of it is her anxiety, part of it is just the kind of person sumi is where she's so polite and self-conscious she ends up taking herself out of things with her own good intentions. stuff like her interrupting the flow of an existing conversation by greeting everyone instead of jumping straight in because she doesn't feel comfortable inserting herself, which means everyone else stops to greet her even though that doesn't normally happen in a friend group, or making a point of thanking everyone for being invited to events while the others take it as a given.
idk i love that she feels a bit out of place with the phantom thieves in p5r. and part of that is a natural consequence of being a new addition in royal who can't be naturally integrated with an existing dynamic but i honestly feel like the writing team realised that and acknowledged it, and really leaned into it, and that made it work incredibly well for me. like, it's part of her character that she's sort of an outsider. it's not like p4g's incredibly clumsy integration of marie and subsequent attempt to shove her down everyone's throat as the canon love interest in p4ga (knife). sumi has that outsider vibe on purpose and it makes me really like her dynamic with the thieves as an individual
goro also feels slightly out of place in these chats, but his conversational style blends more naturally with the other thieves at this point and he even uses their codenames sometimes. i keep saying my chatfic series isn't a real Series because the lore keeps changing, but if we accept that they're all kind of following a General Continuity, assume this takes place some time after the last fic in which ren added goro to the groupchat and they made an effort to integrate him into their friend group. he's kind of there now and has settled into being the weird boyfriend. that's his role.
every time goro says something like "ren and i" assume it's the text equivalent of him talking to the group with his arm around ren's waist.
ok i got really fond of this silly running joke where sumi brings up the weather when she's feeling uncomfortable. she's so polite. i like this thread because setting it up meant i got to tie it off like this:
this just made me happy lol i liked writing this. i tried to use it to demonstrate that despite goro's abrasiveness he obviously knows sumire pretty well, he's attuned to her quirks and knows how to tell when she's having a bad time with her anxiety, so he uses her little weather habit to ground her.
i honestly dont think goro and sumire could be considered close in p5r and as much as i like the "royal trio" in canon they're not really... like... friends? with each other? they're both attached to ren, so it' more a V shape than anything else. but that said, i really LIKE goro and sumi's canon dynamic. he takes a really grouchy but politely attentive supervisory role to her during their few forays into the palace as a trio where he doesn't really know her well but clearly identifies her as a harmless little tryhard who needs some guidance and steps into that role grudgingly, and she immediately looks up to him despite being very wrong footed by his ruthlessness, which i find incredibly charming. i think given time they could be good friends, they just didn't get much chance to know each other very well in canon. so i tried to kinda do that here.
once goro stops being evil and joins the group they all kind of tiredly accept that his role is to occasionally push a cup off a bench while smirking and refuse to clean it up. emotionally, i mean.
wait i need to backtrack chronologically to talk about akeshu.
in this scene they're in the same room lol talking and snickering while typing. im trying to get at that vibe of the annoying couple who is flirting with each other, via you. you know? like ostensibly they're talking to you (sumire) but everything they say to you is part of their stupid game. sumi is incidental to goro and ren teasing each other about flirting with someone else, goro is reporting everything ren says because his boyfriend is so eye-rollingly foolish in a cute way. they're very tickled by how amusing and charming they are. gross. disgusting. sumire im so sorry for putting you through this
anyway here are too many of my favourite jokes from the fic
#futaba gets a lot of my favourite punchlines because i love her. i think she's an incredible vessel for comedic timing#once again you can see how much i overthink everything#given the amount of thought that goes into character shit for what LOOKS like a stupid 3 second chatfic#but is really. a stupid 3 second chatfic with twenty years of overthinking behind it#it takes time and effort. to be this stupid#anyway i love sumi. i think she's so cute. i like her dynamic with the thieves so much#ive said it before but i think chatfic is one of those mediums that looks so deceptively simple because#you know it's just silly dialogue and memes. it's very accessible. anyone can write a funny chatfic#but i think it's such a character-forward 'genre' that it's really really difficult to do well in the sense that it feels like the characte#s you know and not just mouthpieces for memes with familiar names attached. so im kinda obsessed with the genre#it relies so heavily on every character having a distinctive voice without trying too hard to be unique#ideally you should be able to read one of these with no names attached ands till get a general sense of who's talking#without having to rely on liek (sorry) homestuck style quirks which make it visibly obvious#that' skinda hard because irl people's typing styles aren't THAT distinct you know. theres only so many variations#you can make to a person's use of grammar punctuation capitalisation etc before it becomes a gimmick instead of an idiosyncrasy#but hopefully if the character voice is strong enough their identtiy should come through more subtly anyway. idk .idk if im there but i lov#to work towards it#wow i wrote anothr essay in the tags about my love for Modern Epistolary Fiction (chatfic)#after already writing a whole essay in the post#i mgonna shut up guys thanks for having me#rookfic#asks#p5#rookthots
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why
#i only speak chaos₊ ⊹☆⋆。★₊ ⊹#venting again⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ���#inferiority complex goes boom 💥💥💥#i love always getting stuck in second place lmfao!!!!!!!!!!#why cant i be first for once#im not the first choice and im not in first place#always trying never enough 😍😍😍😍😍#it's always the same people im trying im trying im trying IM TRYING GODDAMNIT#vil kinnie hits hard bang bang#i wish i was perfect#i wish i could be first#i wish i didnt always hate myself for coming in second#i wish i actually expressed myself instead of bottling it up because everyone has their own problems#i wish i could stop telling myself that i need to help everyone else even if it means im helpless#but at yhe same time i dont wish that#im just selfish ahaha#sigh do people actually read these anyways
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damn it. now i need to design a Rook so i can actually do something with this mental image of the collective look on Rook and Solas's face when Nessie refers to Solas as "that old fart"
#nessiava tillahnen#dragon age#datv#solas#nessie: DAD im old enough and I want you to carve my vallaslin. please#revallen: i- are you sure? i've told you it's going to be dangerous#nessie: I KNOW but i REFUSE to be the generation where great grandpa's legacy dies#revallen: and i will not keep your heritage from you. you're every inch a Keeper’s daughter and I couldn't be prouder.#revallen: would that our lives could continue peaceably there would be no hesitation from me but our world is drastically different now#nessie: because of that old fart Hahren Solas. I know. but it's still my right!#[Rook losing it; Solas' eye twitching]#revallen: it is. but if what he said is true and the Creators - the Evanuris - will be freed#nessie: Dirthamen's never been violent though has he?#revallen: we cannot know. but if the evanuris are freed then we must assume that the forgotten ones will be as well. yes?#nessie: i mean... yes... but what does that have to do with dirthamen?#revallen: little. except that the forgotten ones were the enemies of the evanuris. any that bear their marks may be in danger.#[solas trying very very very very very hard to keep his composure]
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