#+bonus ramblings from me notes:

[rockium-z]

the star of the show!

@entityneo

[crescentfool]

never in my life did i think i need to makeout with a piece of software so badly but here we are i guess

[wayfinderships]

Alright I gotta stop looking at characters from different games I plan to watch and/or play-I keep getting small crushes!!

[dewitty1]

Saturday Six (Stuff)

The dude and I finally got some of our old furniture moved out of the storage. But my dad's truck decided to be a little bitch. So, I guess we'll be waiting for it to be fixed before we moved anymore. But we gave the stuff to a good cause locally that helps the unhoused here in town, rather than taking it out of town, so that's good!“ψ(｀∇´)ψ

It's hard to see your mistakes when you're making them. It's only when you look again that you see them. Sadly, now I have to rip all my stitches out and redo them. Also it might help if my glasses were cleaned. Good times.( •̀ω•́ )σ

The whole moving debacle is gearing up. I'm not a fan.Σ(-᷅_-᷄๑)

Finally a sunny day. But it's cold AF.(。-ω-)ﾉ

How do you fill a Grand Canyon of negativity with just a trickle of positivity?（’-’*)

How is January the longest year ever? (.﹒︣︿﹒︣.)

[remxedmoon]

i hit 1k followers recently!!!! yipee!!!!!!! thank you all!!! so in celebration here’s all of my completed isat doodle pages, from oldest to newest. go nuts with them!! and maybe don’t look at the first doodle page too closely. it’s Old.

(no greyscale version below for once! just some mushy ramblings. you don’t have to read them don’t worry)

hhhhhha?? so many people. where did you come from. how did you all find me.

ok but seriously, thank you all so much for all the support. i never really. expected to make it this far? like, ever?? i’ve mentioned it a few times on here, but i’ve been a lurker for the past… 2 years, i think? and even before that, i never gained much traction outside of a couple posts. so this has been. very new to me!! in a nice way!! it’s weird to feel like an actual member of a community!! that people know about!

the idea of finally coming back to social media was Daunting (i literally got stress hives writing my first post lol) and the warm reception really. meant a lot?? i don’t think i would’ve ever gotten the courage to come back if i hadn’t been encouraged to by the people over at the isat discord!!

the fact that people actually care about my art still doesn’t feel real?? seeing people take inspiration from my art is just. surreal. just. auagssh. thank you all so so much for everything, i really do appreciate it!!! i’m really glad to be in this community. sorry if this all sounds sappy and long winded i’ve just got a lot of emotions about this whole thing!!

(also as a bonus for reading all this or whatever. here’s a concept page for isatscryption! it felt a little out of place next to my normal canvases so i’m putting it down here! yipee! sorry my notes here are so disjointed auauau…)

[fefern]

✧˖° their ways of showing affection. | aalto, calcharo, lingyang headcanons.

⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ synopsis: you're in love and happily with these wonderful men! but just how do they show their affection for you?

⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ characters involved (separate): aalto, calcharo, lingyang and a gender neutral reader.

⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ warnings: none!

⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ notes: another one! i love thinking about the little ways people show love , it makes me so happy ;v;! enjoy these little blurbs about how they'd love you! also, requests are currently open, so send them my way! also, i could not find a calcharo chibi drawing... ;;

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅ aalto ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

knowledge is power! the more he knows about you, the more he utilizes it in showing his affection for you.

a big, BIG sweet talker. loves to flirt!

also big on compliments, find it cute when you don’t know what to say back.

a big spender in my opinion. oh, you liked that necklace but thought it was too expensive? surprise, it’s on the counter for you when you wake up the next day! you tried to win that plushie at the fair but it just didn’t work out? now you have 20 on the couch!

adores kisses, especially when you pepper them all over his face. (bonus points if you’re wearing lipstick, man is enamored to look at himself and see visually everywhere you smooched him.)

follows the sidewalk rule all the time. does not matter if it’s a safe area, he always is a bit protective in that way.

learns more about your hobbies and likes and begins to learn more about them in his free time. that way, when he sees you again, he’ll be able to engage in conversation with you about it. 

loves the way that your eyes light up when you talk about something you’re passionate about, and stares at you a lot as a result. 

likes to playfully scare you. he seems to have the ability to disappear and reappear as he pleases due to the mist, so he uses it sometimes to suddenly appear behind you and wrap his arms around your waist.

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅ calcharo ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

not much of a talker, and kind of new to showing affection entirely due to his past, so be patient. 

will wake up early and remind you to bring a jacket if it’s cold.

the type of person to also remind you that you forgot something, but by the time you turn around, he has the missing item in his hand.

will protect you if you’re scared of something. loud thunder? his hands are around your ears. scary part of a show? he’s using his arm to pull you closer to his chest to hide in. 

will quietly work in the same room as you, enjoying your presence entirely as you and him work. 

will sometimes ask those he knows around him for some advice about love, which is sort of strange considering who it’s coming from, but he wants to improve himself to be a better partner for you.

tries to apply the advice after, it’s a hit or miss sometimes, but always coming from a good place. 

iffy on physical touch, but he will slowly come to enjoy the feeling of holding your hand.

he also does the thumb thing where you rub the back of a person’s hand with your thumb while holding hands. his favorite.

will let you play with his hair sometimes in the morning if he’s in the mood for it. even if you do something goofy like braid his hair or put it into a random hairdo, he’ll enjoy the feeling of your hands in his hair as he slowly stirs awake. 

ruthless and cold in many other aspects of his life, he’s a gentle giant when it comes to you, and it’s endearing to see him try.

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅ lingyang ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

will always love to eat with you, whether it’s going out or cooking with you. 

^ always lets you have the last bite of the meal.

immediately looks for your reaction after he tells a joke with you, wanting to make sure that you enjoy his playfulness.

during the summer heatwaves, will use his glacio powers to help keep the both of you cool.

will sit in your lap and let you play with his ears as he rambles about his day.

loves yapping, and yapping in your presence as the two of you either bounce back and forth or you just listen, he likes both options. 

loves hugs, hugs tight and for a long time, will not let go of you until you let go of him first.

will compliment your scent and comment on it if you change something up like your shampoo or perfume, usually the first to notice those small changes.

shares a blanket with you on cold days and cuddles with you for warmth.

will sometimes, after waking up, just admire your features because wow he got lucky because you’re his.

even if you wake up and your eyes are looking back at him, he does it without shame.

whenever someone talks about you, if they say something wrong, he’ll immediately interject. (ex. “they like strawberries the most.” “no no, they like peaches more!”)

does practice runs of new tricks and dance moves he learns for his lion dances, asking you about your opinion on them because it means the world to him to know you like the dance he’s so passionate about. 

gets matching lucky charms with you and carries his around everywhere. “maybe we’ll win the lottery with this!” he tells you.

(he already did. after all, you’re his partner.)

[loveriotss]

haiii if possible, could u do the bf! hcs + txts with izuku with someone who's personality is like ai from oshi no ko if not it's totally fine still tysm :3

HCS + TXTS WITH HIM AS YOUR BOYFRIEND ⸻ izuku midoriya

INCLUDES — gn! reader, fluff, crack, headcannons, social media au

main masterlist — mha masterlist ༊*·˚

: ̗̀➛ click here to read other character versions

THE MOST SWEETEST BF EVER!!!!

will send you a good morning and night message everyday.

you know how he tends to ramble irl? he does the same thing on text! he’d just keep typing and typing and wouldn’t even realize how lengthy the message has gotten until he sent it.

chronically online.

all that time spent on social media keeping up with all might updates slowly progressed to him knowing internet references and brain rot.

he won’t use it as much in his speech though. he tries to but overthinks it and ends up going against it, scared that he may have gotten the meaning wrong.

he enjoys spending time with you, just him and you on a cute little date like checking out new all might merch, going to arcades, browsing through bookstores or spa/self care dates in the dorms.

all this helps relax the two of you from the stress of school and hero activities. 

he also asks you to spar with him and sometimes y'all use quirks.

this gets you both a sufficient training done and a bonus for izuku as he can take notes in his hero journal. 

if you ever got even the slightest scratch during these fights he would completely panic and would keep apologizing over and over again.

will make sure you’re okay and comfortable even hours later when you’re about to go to bed

he prefers calls over texts because he likes how close he can your voice when on the phone.

his instagram has little snippets of his life. just normal things like daily life, hangouts, school life etc.

he posts you too! on special days and also out of the blue when he secretly takes pictures of you on dates.

he has another account dedicated to all might.

he will always like and comment on your posts no matter what they may be.

NOTE — hi nonniee im sorry for the lateass post ive been prepping for school since my summer break's almost over 😭. i tried implementing ai's personality into reader as much as i can and it was a bit hard but i hope you like it!! (ps: i actually died making the all might parts)

©loveriotss — all rights reserved to me. please don’t try to copy/steal my work. please do not use any of my ideas/translate my work without my permission.

[a-spes]

| DEVIOUS LIES — Part two (8.790 words).

| Summary — Anon Request — When your friend asked you out for a drink, you didn't think much about it. Yet, maybe you should've, because that night ruined your life. It has been two years, and you can't stop think about what you lost. Your job, your friends, your lover, and even your mind was left in that motel room.

| Tags & warnings — Avenger!Natasha Romanoff x Avenger!Reader, AoS!OC x Avenger!Reader, Other Avengers, angst without comfort, cheating, mental health issues, suicidal ideations, self depreciation, mentions of SA&SH, manipulation, toxic relationship (OCxR), revenge porn, use of drugs.

| Author's notes — I don't know how I feel about that second part, i'm not sure i like it, but now it's written it costs me nothing to share. So here we are. I can just hope that I managed to convey, at least a little, the emotions I wanted to. And, most importantly, take care of yourself.

| MOODBOARD — ✧ — MASTERLIST — ✧ — TO SAY SOMETHING

| Part one. Part two. Part three. the scars in our hearts (bonus part).

Almost a year has gone by, and it means one thing: in a few weeks, it’s going to be Natasha's birthday, again. The woman is not sure how she feels about it. She never really had a birthday before she joined the Avengers, and despite the years that have passed since, she still feels a certain awkwardness at this time of the year. Especially as the boys tended to do too much.

She could only pretend to match their enthusiasm. A slight smile spreads across her face as she takes a sip from her drink, staying silent. She has been listening to her teammates talking about her birthday’s party for almost half an hour now. She stopped trying to avoid it a long time ago, when she realized how much they enjoyed organizing this stupid party. She can deal with anything they’re going to come up with if she gets to see their smiles in exchange. Her sentence won’t last more than a few hours, but the memories are going to stick with them for eternity, and it has no price.

"Wait, you know what?” someone asked. It was Clint, and by the mischievous smile on his face, the redhead already knew that she wouldn't appreciate the next words that are going to come out of his mouth. “I think we should have the mascot come over again," he added, his eyes not leaving hers. "What? It was funny to have a cartoon version of you running around," he defended himself when he saw her glance darkening.

"You know what? Do whatever you want," she mumbled, “it’s not as if you were asking for my opinion anyway,” she eventually gave in. Sometimes, you have to know how to pick your battles, and that is one she definitely cannot win, not when all the others seem to appreciate the idea.

"That’s such a great idea!” one exclaimed, and this time it was Peter Parker, “Mr. Stark, do you think they would accept to come again?” he asked the man.

"Obviously!" Tony replied without an ounce of hesitation, laughing at the question. The man thought it was a stupid thing to ask, "she likes you too much to miss your birthday,” he explained, pointing at the redhead while saying those words. "What? She pretends it’s not true, but I know she is lying. I can see right through her and, believe me, she’ll be here,"  he explained when he noticed the confused looks of his teammates.

"Who’s she?" a voice asked, cutting short to Tony’s rambling. That’s the question that has been on everyone’s minds, but that no one dared to ask out loud, except for one of them — And it hasn’t been Natasha, it is Steve that spoke first.

On the contrary, the woman remained silent because she didn’t need words to express herself, a silent conversation taking place between the billionaire and her through a simple glance. Even if she already has her suspicions, and is almost sure that she knows the answer to that question, she wants him to say it, refusing to believe it otherwise.

The moment she saw the box, she was intrigued by it, something drawing the woman to the small package that no one claimed as theirs. It’s almost as if it came out of nowhere, no one knowing who left it here, or what may be inside the black box. At first, she thought it was some joke, but she knew they were being honest when saying they had nothing to do with the gift. And if she had expected a lot of things to be wrapped in the red ribbon, she definitely wasn’t ready for a ghost from her past to emerge from it.

A quick glance before she suddenly closes the box again, that’s all it took for the redhead to know who was behind that gift. The only thing she could think about was how — How did it happen without any of them noticing your presence? Despite the appearances, and the smile she was trying to keep on, the woman was shaken — Why would you do that, more than two years after your break up? Could it be that you are that desperate?

"Is everything okay?" Clint asked, being the only one to seem to notice a change in Natasha’s behavior. At least, everyone had enough restraint to not ask the question that burns their lips — What’s inside the box?

She wouldn’t have answered if one of them had asked. She wouldn’t even have opened the gift if she had known that it was from you, and that’s probably why you left it on the table, avoiding giving it to her directly. Smart girl, she thought. At first sight, the woman couldn’t tell it was coming from you but there was no doubt remaining once she saw the content — There is only one person on Earth that cares enough to give her such a gift. A person that constantly looks after her, guessing what the redhead wasn’t telling.

A person that she used to love. 

A person that couldn’t be here, was she? The woman can’t help but glance around but she can’t find your face. What was she expecting anyway? To see you in the corner of the room with a bright smile and your arms open for her to throw herself in a hug? That was stupid, and so is the hint of hope she felt when she opened the box. The others told her many times she has to turn the page, but she doesn’t seem ready to let you go. Even after two years, she is still craving your presence as much as before.

The thought of it puts to shame the redhead who knows she shouldn’t hold on to the past, especially when the past in question has a pretty face and breaks her heart. Even after what you’ve done to her, she has spent hours crying, praying for you to come back. Even after listening to the others assuring her that she deserves better, she couldn’t forget how you’ve always been the most caring, and strong, and beautiful person she has ever met in her life. 

You weren’t horrible. Were you? 

Sometimes, she thinks you are a monster. 

Sometimes, she thinks she is, for not listening to you that day. 

That day, she let her anger speak for her, something she swore she would never do again. When she started to realize that, maybe, she should’ve listened to your version of the events, it was too late. At the time, she couldn’t bear to hear the sound of your voice or see your voice, but after two years, as the memory of it starts to fade away, she surprised herself to miss it. 

Except that Fury had refused to tell her where you were. She tried to ask nicely, to beg, and even to threaten the man, but none of it worked. He said that you needed time, that you’ll be back when you are ready, not before. Despite her frustration, the woman accepted it. After all, she is the one to blame, the one that puts herself in such a situation. She could only hold on to the fact that, one day, you’ll be back. Right? As the days go by, the likelihood of ever seeing you again is gradually diminishing. Some nights, when she can’t sleep, she stays up, eyes fixed on her laptop’s screen — Maybe she could give fate a helping hand? She knows she could find you easily. Yet, despite her urge to do it, she has always ended up closing her laptop without starting the research. 

She has to trust Fury, she repeats to herself. Even if she sometimes disagrees with the man, even if it’s frustrating, she has to believe him when he says that you are safe.

Some other nights, all she can feel is anger, and hatred. The redhead is lost, and scared, again, something she never thought she would feel again the day you two met. What if it was true, and you really cheated on her? Then, you could do it again if she forgives you, because history always repeats itself, and you are no exception to the rules of the universe. She knows how people tend to promise a lot of things that they don’t mean, especially when they are desperate, which is exactly what you’ve been that day. She couldn’t forget the look on your face when she dragged you out of the building, the despair in those bright eyes, glistening with tears. This is the only thing she can remember when she thinks about you. Not the good moments you’ve shared, only the brutality of the end of your relationship. 

You've abandoned her, and so did she.

It has been three since she last saw you, and almost a year since her birthday party, but the woman couldn’t stop thinking about it. She didn’t take the gift, leaving the jewelry in the box, and the box on a shelf. She hasn't touched it since. How could she when just the sight of it was already too much to bear?

Every day, when she wakes up, it is one of the first things she sees, and one of the last when she goes to sleep. If it doesn’t feel right to the woman to take the gift, it doesn’t feel right to throw it in the bin either, so it stayed here as a constant reminder of what she has done. Every time she thinks she is finally over it, the box rekindles her doubts. There are some things she can’t quite understand about the situation, and why you would give her such a gift, two years after she kicked you out, is one of them.

Maybe it was a poisoned gift. Maybe it was a sick trick to make her feel guilty, a way to get her to crawl back to you. Beside these possibilities, she couldn’t think of any others that were likely, and she was afraid to admit that your plan was working. The box was a permanent reminder of your existence, something she couldn’t get herself to give away because of those dumb feelings she was experiencing. Somehow, she was holding on to that last piece of your years together after she threw away everything else with the help of the team.

The pictures, the clothes, the gifts, even your favorite cutlery has been burned a few days after you left them. It is almost as if you’ve never stepped a foot into the building, as if you’ve never existed. The woman was fine with the idea of pretending that nothing happened — She was fine with the idea of erasing every remaining part of your relationship.

Except that black box. It is stupid how she hangs onto that last proof of the relationship she once had with you. She had burned everything, but she couldn’t get herself to do the same with that gift. Maybe because she knew that she could never erase you completely from her life. She surely could pretend, it is a game she is really good at, but you would always be on the back of her mind because memories don't go away as easily as objects do.

Since she had opened the box, doubt had been creeping inside of her — What if? What if she has been wrong the whole time? What if she should have listened to you? Give you a second chance? That day, her reaction had been dictated by anger and hatred, feelings that still inhabit her soul, but have faded over the years. For two years, she had been sure that she made the right choice — At least, that’s what everyone kept telling the woman, and she listened to their comforting words.

But since she opened the box, she was no longer sure of anything. She wasn’t the one that wanted you gone in the first place. She surely needed a bit of space before being able to talk with you properly, but only a few days, maybe a few weeks, not two years, and definitely not more than that. That little box only worsened her doubt because who would be desperate enough to still cling to the person they betrayed, years after the events? A person truly in love. She had kept her doubts for herself before that day. If she is almost sure of the identity of the person who gave her the box, because there is only one person on that planet that cares enough to gift her something so meaningful, there are still a lot of questions to which she doesn’t have the answers — For example, how did you manage to sneak into the building without everyone knowing? She now knows that someone knew the whole time.

“Tell me,” she firmly asked the man, leaving little room for discussion.

No one pointed out the thing he has said about the mascot, the subject of the conversation quickly changed after that. Except, while they were talking about which flavor the cake should be, Natasha could think of nothing but Tony’s words — “She likes you too much to miss your birthday”, “she pretends it’s not true but I know she is lying.” So when everyone eventually decided to go back to their rooms, around two in the morning, she stayed a bit longer in the common room in hope of getting some information.

“Sorryy, I can’t, I don’t know anything,” the man replied, indifferent to her tone, “anything at all,” he repeated, chuckling like a child who has done something wrong. 

The woman sighs, pinching her nose as she takes a deep breath, trying to not lash out her frustration on the man. The conversation isn’t exactly going the way she had hoped, Tony refusing to answer her question no matter how many times she has already asked. She even tried to blackmail him, but he was persistent in pretending that he didn’t know anything. When he almost falls on the ground trying to get a few steps back, it has been the last straw for the woman. Gladly, someone entered the room before she could hit him so hard that it would have sobered him in an instant.

"Is everything okay?" the voice asked, and both of them immediately shut up to turn their heads toward the woman who just entered the room, Astrid. She is leaning in the doorway, her gaze alternating between Tony and Natasha.

She hates her. Not as much as she hates you, but she still feels resentful toward the agent. When she smiles, when she speaks, even when she is just here, existing, the woman can’t help but hate her from the depths of her heart. Gladly, she rarely sees her, as an agent of the S.H.I.E.L.D., she is only around when they have outstanding missions. If Natasha had a choice, she would’ve thrown her away with you that day. 

"She wants me to admit that her girlfriend was the one in the costume," he immediately replied, "but sshht, we can’t let her know that!" he added, holding his index finger in front of his mouth for a few seconds before leaving the room giggling. 

"I know what happened," she eventually said when she noticed that Natasha was about to leave after a few seconds when they glanced at each other in silence. "Th- That night, in the motel room~," she added, her voice being hesitant. Those words made the redhead stop in her tracks.

"If you're about to rub in my face how you've ruined my life, you can shut up," she immediately cut her, not wanting to listen to the woman, not if it’s to tell her about how she fucked the woman she loves. Her voice was full of anger, just like the murderous look in her eyes. The only thing that prevented the woman from immediately leaving the room was the thing she saw in the other’s eyes. Her attitude betrayed her emotions, a mix of guilt, sadness, and shame, which aroused her curiosity. 

With a nod, she ordered her to continue.

That morning, as many others, you are woken up by your girlfriend’s gentle touches, her fingers slowly tracing circles on your stomach. A hum of satisfaction escapes your lips before your turn around, nuzzling your head further into the crook of her neck.

How could you have known it would be the last time? How could you have possibly guessed that the routine you’ve got used to would be broken so quickly?

Every morning, it is the same thing, and while the former spy has no problems getting up early, you definitely can’t say the same for yourself. She is always awake before you are and, even if she had never admitted it, you are sure that she takes a few minutes to observe your sleeping form. She loves seeing you so peaceful and calm, being able to have a glimpse of your face without those worry lines, without the marks of your anxieties. 

She is always the one who wakes you up, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. There is no better way to start a day than Natasha’s sweet words and caresses. It’s her fault if you never want to get out of bed, wishing every morning that you could stay in that bed, next to her, for the rest of your life. Sometimes, you suggest that you tell the others you are sick, just to spend a day together, but she just laughs, dismissing your idea.

But all the good things must come to an end, right?

"It's time to get up, milaya," she softly said in your ear, her breath tickling your skin, "Astrid won't be happy if you are late again," she added when the only answer you gave her was a groan of discontent.

"They won't say anything if I am late once, it's okay", you mumbled, her words not being enough to convince you to leave the comfort of her arms. 

Especially when you realize that there is nothing to get excited about the day ahead of you, in perspective, only hours spent in an office, listening to men who think they know everything better than you do. Today, you are supposed to attend an important meeting alongside Astrid, and you still don’t know why you volunteered. The thought of the paperwork and the efforts that you will have to put in pretending that you are actually happy to be here definitely don’t worth your pay.

Except that you’ve lied to Natasha, and she knows it. This is definitely not the first time that you are being late, it happens almost every day, to the point that the day you are in time can probably be counted on your hands. Gladly, when you are coming in the S.H.I.E.L.D.’s quarters, it's Astrid who’s your supervisor, and she appears to also be your best friend. Most of the time, she is kind enough to accept to close her eyes on your delays. Today, you came in only ten minutes late, and the woman was somehow impressed, expecting you to be later than that.

“You’re late, again,” she replied, obviously waiting for an excuse that you don't have. She would know if you are lying to her, and you don't have the energy for that kind of game today, and you could see that the woman neither. She was starting to get tired of every day starting with the same bullshit coming from your mouth.

“I am so, so, sorry,” you said to her for what may be the tenth time since you’ve entered the office. She is walking fast, and you are trying to catch up with the black-haired woman, who is also your superior within the S.H.I.E.L.D. “Please, don’t tell Fury,” you begged, but all she did was roll her eyes, and give you a file when you eventually reached her office. You quickly glanced at it before closing it again, your attention focused on the woman, “Astrid, I am serious. He is going to give me more paperwork if you do. Or worse. Imagine if he forces me to train the new recruits, you know I can’t do that again. Please, …,” you added, looking at her imploringly.

“And what do I have in exchange?” she sighed, turning around to look at you, one eyebrow raised. Despite her serious expression, you know she was trying to not laugh. She may be your boss, but above all she is your friend, and you both know that she would never tell Fury about your delays. Even if she has threatened you to do so a few times in the past, she has never actually done it. Yet, this time she felt like she needed something in exchange, she had covered for you enough time for free, and you were happy to thank your friend with whatever she may want.

“Anything you want!” you replied, desperate but no less honest. 

“Tonight, after work, you pay me a drink, deal?” she asked after pretending to think for a few seconds. In reality, she already knew what she wanted from you. She has thought about asking you out since the moment you met, something you’ve never noticed, always reducing her to the role of a friend, and not keeping up on the clues she was leaving you. Tonight, however, she will be clearer than she has ever been.

“Deal!” you immediately said, accepting the proposal without thinking twice about it. "Thank you. Thank you so, so much. You are the best," you added, kissing your friend on the cheek before leaving the room quickly, a sight that made the woman chuckle.

It is a deal that makes you both happy. You have met Astrid at the Academy, when you were both trainees that dreamed of joining the S.H.I.E.L.D. without even knowing if you were good enough for that. The two of you quickly became close — That’s the kind of thing that happens where you are the only two females of your promotion. Either you hate each other over your dead bodies, or you grow so close that you become inseparable. 

Except that, since you've both achieved your dreams and joined S.H.I.E.L.D, something changed in your relationship. It wasn’t your fault, nor hers, that you had less time to see each other, your jobs taking a lot of your time and energy. Then you've been assigned on a long-term mission with the Avengers, and you’ve spent less time at the S.H.I.E.L.D.’s quarters despite still working for the organization. Then you've met Natasha, and you feel like you’ve slightly grown apart from each other after you’ve announced to her your new relationship. On the whole, you had less time to spend with your best friend, and the promises to make up for the lost time have never been kept, not until today. That deal was the perfect occasion to spend a bit of time together outside of the office work.

You both really hoped that this night would make things back as they were before.

"You know, I love her," she confessed to the redhead, her voice being barely louder than a whisper as she felt tears filling her eyes. "Since the day we met, I have loved her. That's what I told her, that night, when we went out," she admitted, and Natasha felt her heart pounding in her chest, her hands were shaking with apprehension, “but she rejected me. She loves you so much, too much," she sadly chuckled, but the redhead felt no relief when she heard those words because they were not explaining the pictures. She can't cry, not now, not in front of that woman.

"Continue," she ordered, feeling that the woman had more to say than that. She already knew that Astrid loved you, you may be the only one that hadn't seen it, or maybe you were pretending, or maybe you were blinded by your love for Natasha.

"I didn't plan to do that, you know," she started, carefully looking at the spy, "but I was so desperate that night, and I-," she said, except she was unable to finish her sentence, the words stuck in her throat.

The past three years, she had kept the truth a secret. At first, she thought it was better that way. The woman was ashamed of her actions, and she was relieved when heard that you’ve been transferred to another department, and she thought that her secret would be safe. Except that, if everyone acted as if you’ve never existed, her mind didn’t allow her to forget. Every hour of every day, you were in her mind, and the longer she thought about that night, the biggesther guilt became, until the burden was too heavy to bear. Tonight, hearing them argue about you, has been the last straw.

“What did you do?” she asked, sensing that something was wrong. She didn’t like the feeling that was creeping inside of her, “what. did. you. do.?” she asked once again, but more firmly that time, when the other didn’t immediately answer her question. As she saw the hesitation, she reduced the distance between them in a second, her hand gripping the collar of Astrid’s shirt that she pins to the wall abruptly, “tell me. Now,” she insisted as the interaction only reinforced the bad feeling she had.

That morning, unlike the others, you woke up alone. There haven’t been the gentle caresses of your girlfriend to wake you up, nor her sweet words to coax you into getting up. No, that day, it was only yourself, draped into the cold sheets, and it felt so strange, the silence and the loneliness of the room. Sadly, it has not been the exception you’ve wished it would be, but only the first of too many mornings like that.

In the sleepy state you were in, it took you a few seconds to realize that something was wrong, and almost a minute before you noticed that you weren’t home. You couldn’t even recognize the place you were in, only knowing that it looked like a hotel, a shitty one if you might say. The room was small, simple, and not-so-comfortable. There was something in the ambience that gave you an uneasy feeling about the whole thing, but you were unable to say what it was exactly.

Your head is throbbing, and you are definitely feeling nauseous, but you know that’s not the problem. Your physical distress isn’t the cause of the weight on your chest, the one that makes your breath aching, it’s something else that your mind can’t comprehend yet. It’s all these inconsistencies. The missing memories of last night, the unknown room, the fact that you are alone,... you don’t remember drinking that much last night. You may not be the most responsible person that planet has known, but you know how to handle yourself. Usually. 

Could you have possibly drunk that much? 

The day has barely started, but you already know it is going to be a rough one. If only you knew how right you were, maybe you would have taken a few more hours of sleep, enjoying the comfortable peace of your old life a bit longer before joining the chaos. Yet, you had no means to guess that your day would go that way. 

It's a note left on the bedside table that answered all your questions, easing some of the worries that were creeping inside of you. Someone has written the following words : “Couldn’t get you home because of how drunk you were. don’t worry about being late today, I won’t tell Fury. however, had to go on a mission, be careful when you go home. I left you a bit of money, it should be enough to pay for the room and an Uber. Love you.” The message might not have been signed, but you can easily recognize Astrid’s handwriting. A smile spreads across your lips as you are reassured, the situation not being as bad as your mind made it look.

Some memories of last night flew back in your mind, but it’s only a glimpse of what happened, a lot of the events staying unknown to yourself. The last thing you can remember is the conversation you had with Astrid, when she admitted that she loved you and you replied that you too, thinking she meant as friends because you couldn’t see her any other way, not when you were already engaged in a relationship. The rest of the exchange is confused, and you are not sure what’s real and what has been made up by alcohol. Even today, you are still not sure. 

Maybe you’ve really drunk too much that night.

Knowing that you’ve been with Astrid the whole time was reassuring, and you are no longer as bothered by the absence of memories. For a moment, you thought you'd been kidnapped by some weird man. As you regain your composure, your thoughts become clearer and you decide that the first thing you should do is to send a message to your girlfriend. She must be so worried, and your heart aches at the thought that you might be a source of problem for the woman you love.

It is not your kind to not keep your promises, and you’ve told her you would be home last night. It is not your kind either to not answer her messages or calls. In reality, you are quite the opposite, always sending her hundreds of messages when you are out with your friends. The only reason she hasn’t got after you is because she knew you were with Astrid, and she trusted you. However, the sweet messages are going to have to wait because, when you try to turn your phone on, you only encounter a black screen, a sign that you’ve run out of battery. Obviously, your friend didn’t think to leave you a charger.

You sigh, admitting your defeat. Shaking your phone surely won’t change the situation. For the moment, there is nothing more you can do, except hoping that Natasha won’t be too angry. As you are getting ready, your mind is focused on how to earn the redhead’s forgiveness — Maybe you could stop to buy her some flowers? You hate it, when the two of you are arguing. It doesn’t happen a lot, but it’s never pretty, and the mere thought that it might happen was already hurting.

As you definitely couldn’t go back to the compound by yourself, not knowing how far you were and being in a pitiful state, you decided to use the money left by Astrid to call a cab, as she instructed you to do. It’s not before you enter the car that you realize how late you actually were. It is almost one in the afternoon, and if you are not an early riser, like your girlfriend who is always up by six at the latest, you rarely get up after ten.

It has been a thirty minutes drive back to the compound, and the whole time you were thinking about two things: taking a shower, and leaning into your girlfriends’ arms. You are so exhausted, physically and mentally, that you’ve decided to skip work today — You were already so late that it wouldn’t make a big difference anyway. The journey was long, and those thirty minutes felt like hours. 

Soon enough, you started to suffocate into your own mind, then skin. You felt so sweaty, and dirty, that it quickly became unbearable. Maybe it was the effects of the alcohol, or maybe because you’ve slept in a seedy motel, but the only thing you wanted was to get rid of the clothes you were wearing and the uncomfortable state you were in as soon as possible.

When you enter the compound, you find it empty, and so is the room you are sharing with the woman. If you frown, you don’t think much about it. If the building is rarely empty, it sometimes happens when emergencies are called. A whine escapes your lips as you realize that, if it’s true, they are going to be mad at you for not being here when they needed it. You can already feel your mind losing itself to self-hatred thoughts, as you mutter to yourself how stupid you are. You are going to need more than a few flowers to earn their forgiveness. The fact that JARVIS confirmed that everyone was at the S.H.I.E.L.D.'s quarters didn’t, you would have preferred to hear that they went to the restaurant without you rather than that.

Tears brimming your eyes, you quickly put your phone to charge. It is only when you get out of the shower, twenty minutes later, that you saw the missed calls and messages from Natasha. The most recent ones were sent a few minutes ago. There were too many of them for you to take time to read everything so you just sent her a quick text that said: “sorry, my battery was dead, and I couldn’t answer your calls. I’ll explain everything, I promise. see you soon. love you.” A message she saw but she didn’t answer, which is unusual and an obvious hint of how angry she probably is.

Despite your decision to not work today, you still end up in the S.H.I.E.L.D.’s quarters. You are almost running in the corridors, going to the meeting room where you find your girlfriend, and the rest of the Avengers. When you stumble into the room, a deadly silence descends. None of them greeted you, and the only reaction you got was Fury’s nod when you started mumbling excuses for your late arrival. While your eyes immediately landed on the redhead, she didn’t glance at you once of the entire meeting. The sight made your heart sink. You love her, but you have to admit that the spy is scary when she has that stern expression on her face, one that leaves no room for discussion.

The safest decision was to sit on the furthest chair, leaving her space until you get the opportunity to explain yourself. Something that you hadn't had a chance to do before a few more hours, when you stumbled into her in the corridors. You have been lost in your mind, having a hard time focusing on your work. Earlier, when the meeting ended, she immediately left the room, not leaving you a chance to exchange a word with her, and it has been bugging you since.

“Please, wait,” you said, already begging the woman. When she heard your voice, she stopped, allowing you to gently grab at her arm so she didn't go. She could, if she wanted to, and a part of her did want to run away, but the rest of her knows that this conversation can’t be avoided. “Listen, I- I am sorry,” you started once you were sure she was willing to listen to your excuses, “I should have warned you, but I couldn’t, my phone’s battery was dead and, and- honestly? I don't remember much of what happened last night. All I know is that once was enough. It won't happen again,” you chuckled sadly. When you woke up that morning, you promised to yourself that it was the last time you drank that much. A promise you kept, and three years later, you still haven’t touched a bottle of alcohol. “I promise, 'tasha. Please, don't be mad at me for that, or at least tell me how I can make up for my mistake,” you said, and the woman knew she had heard enough.

“Seriously?” she scoffed, breaking free of your grip. “I can’t believe you are that stupid,” she said, as she started to walk away. But if she didn’t want to hear the sound of your voice any more, you, however, weren’t done yet.

"I know I’ve made a mistake, but I am fine, isn’t it the most important?” you asked, starting to follow. Except that, when she heard your steps in her back, she accelerated her pace. “I promise to be more careful next time but, you know, I can handle myself for one night. Well, I might have drunk a bit too much, but Astrid was wi~,” you tried to explain, except she cut short your ramblings. To say, eyebrows furrowed in confusion, but the woman quickly cut you. She scoffed again, in disbelief this time.

"You are really stupid, aren't you?” she said, stopping in her tracks, and you almost ran into her, surprised by her sudden stop. A few more seconds passed before she turned around to face you, her posture matching her stern expression. “Do you think I don't know what happened last night, with Astrid? Do you really think I wouldn’t have known the truth?” she added, taking a step forward for every question she asked, and you took one back every time, until your back hit the walls. You would certainly have found the situation hot if she didn’t look like she was about to murder you.

“W- what?” you said, “you are mad because I went out with a friend. That’s the problem? Astrid is the problem?" you snapped, starting to feel frustrated about the whole situation. 

You are tired, and the only thing you’ve wanted to do since you opened your eyes that morning — Throwing yourself in your girlfriend’s arms — was impossible to do. You hadn’t expected the woman to give you such a hard time. You knew she could be jealous sometimes, you’ve already had arguments about that in the past, but you’ve always been understanding because you know that her jealousy isn’t caused by a lack of trust. This feeling is fuelled by her own insecurities and past. Except that, that time, it was too much. The way she wouldn't listen to your excuses is seriously hitting on your nerves.

"Don't you dare to lie to me,” she said. For a moment, you thought she was going to hit you, but she took a step back before she could do that. She was angry too, taking deep breaths in an attempt to ease the feeling. “I trusted you,” she eventually added but her tone was different — The anger left her voice, replaced by pain. “I trusted you and, most importantly, I loved you,” she whispered, turning around to see you one last time. “After everything I have done for you, I can't believe that's how you are thanking me. You know, I really thought you were different, better," she laughed, trying very hard to not throw you against the walls or worse, to cry. The most insufferable was the look in your eyes, the false innocence. She was tired of pretending, she had given you enough chances to tell her the truth, “but you’re not,” but now, she was done trying.

That is the last time the two of you talked. The next time you’ve seen her, she hasn’t been kind enough to let you have a chance to explain things. She was done trying, and so were you. The last words she said are still ringing in your head, even years later. Maybe if you'd chased her once again that day, things would have ended differently, but you haven’t moved. You couldn’t, petrified by the conversation that just took place, you have just watched the redhead walking away without glancing back.

It’s only when you enter the break room that you understand the whole conversation you had with Natasha. No one was here, but the walls had been covered with pictures of yourself. At first, you thought it was a prank from your teammates’ but the pictures were all but innocent. You felt your heart sink when you took down one of the photos to get a closer look at it, and tears in your eyes when you realized that you were nude in those.

It was you, in bed, with Astrid. Your face doesn’t entirely show but you can easily recognize yourself and the bed you’ve woken up in that morning. There were dozens of different pictures, but all showed similar scenes: your bodies against each other as you are obviously sharing an intimate moment. Something that you should only share with one person on that Earth. A person that is definitely not Astrid. 

Except that the more you look at those pictures, the more foreign they feel. You are sure you are the one in the pictures, but you are still unable to remember what happened. Slowly, doubt creeps into your heart — Did you drink that much last night? 

So much that you betrayed the woman you swore to love until the sun dies? 

You feel tears welling up in your eyes. You are suddenly overwhelmed by a bunch of emotions that you can’t describe, but that are definitely not pleasant. It is a mix of confusion, anger, guilt, and disgust. The pictures speak for themselves, and they leave little room for doubt about what you were doing — And you were surely not just sleeping. The woman was on top of you, her mouth closed to your neck, maybe she was leaving soft kisses against your skin, maybe she was whispering sweet things in your ears, you don’t know. But the thing you were focused on was her hand hidden by the sheets, leaving only your imagination to complete the scene. It wasn’t the only picture of that kind: they were all picturing similar scenes. You can easily understand her rage and hatred earlier because you are now sharing those feelings with your girlfriend, just for different reasons.

"What's wrong sweetheart?" a voice said, pulling out of your mind. It was Astrid, who just entered the room. She glanced around before looking back at you, a sad smile spreading on her lips when she notices the tears that are soaking your face. and you saw Astrid entering the room. She looks around, a sorry look on her face. "I am sorry,” she started, and you could feel she was looking for the right thing to say, “I- I sent the pictures to the wrong person. When I realized, I tried to explain to Romanoff but, well… you know how she is,” she explained, shrugging as if she was trying to make you believe she had actually tried to, “she wouldn't listen to me, and they- they did that before I could stop them. It doesn’t please me either," she added, reminding you that you weren’t the only one suffering from the situation. Except she seemed to deal with the situation better than you do. As she talked, she slowly walked closer to you, accompanying each of her sentences with a few steps forward until she was close enough to wrap you in her arms. 

You didn’t get the energy to push her away.

"Did we.. ?" you asked, but your voice broke before you could finish your sentence. It felt too difficult to say those words out loud — “Did we hook up? Did I cheat on Natasha?” But the woman doesn’t need the words to be said, she seems to read in your mind the end of your sentence.

"Of course we did, what kind of question is that?" she replied, frowning. She seems to be surprised by your question. For a second, the hand that was slowly caressing the back of your head stopped. The woman pulled back a little, just so she could see your face. "Why? Do you regret it?" she asked, and for an instant she seemed to be genuinely worried about your reaction, "because you didn't seem to last night, when you cried my name,..." she whispered in your ear. You could feel her breath tickling your skin but it wasn’t a pleasant feeling, unlike when Natasha does it.

Everything felt so much. Her voice, her touch, her presence so close to you, was now unbearable. As she remembers the night you’ve spent, a soft smirk spreads on her lips, but you are definitely not sharing her feelings. “Of course we did.” The words loop back into your mind, it seeps in like a poison that quickly takes over your whole being. Soon, you are paralyzed by an awful feeling. It hurts, but at the same time you are not sure you are actually feeling something, your body and mind feeling so foreign to you — If you wanted it, why does it feel so wrong?

At that moment, if you had been able to move, you would have ripped your ears off just so you wouldn’t hear her voice any more, and maybe you would have done the same with your skin. It felt like the only way to get rid of your overwhelming feelings. Suddenly, the reassuring touch of your best friend made you feel gross, and so do her sweet words — But if she said that you did it, and wanted it, then it must be true, right?

You have seen the pictures, they are in your hands, right under your eyes. You can see yourself betraying the woman you love and in those, you really don't give the impression that you didn’t want to. On the contrary.

"No, no, it- it's not that, it’s just…," you eventually managed to say, but you are hesitating and unsure of yourself. There are too many thoughts and words clouding your head, so many ways you could react and yet, none of what you could say or do felt right. "It’s just that I don’t even remember last night,” you admitted, feeling ashamed about it, “I mean, did we- you know,... for real?" you asked softly but you were not even listening to Astrid’s answer, the question was more for yourself in reality. "Sorry, I have to go, see you later", you said, interrupting the woman. Somehow, you regained control over your body, just enough to push the other away and leave the room. You are not sure where you are going, but as far from that room as you can is already a good start.

That's where she found you when she came home that night, sitting on the bathroom's floor, the pictures in your hands.

Your hand is still wrapped tightly around the pictures, but you didn’t notice it. Not before being back home, in the room you are sharing with Natasha — Or were sharing, you thought, unsure about how the situation would unfold. It may be the last time you set a foot in that room that has been your safe place for months. Before you could completely break down, you decided to take a shower, thinking that, maybe, the steaming water would be enough to ease your mind. You took two showers. Then three, then four, and maybe more. You can’t be sure, you’ve stopped counting. All you knew was that it hasn’t been enough to get rid of the uneasy feelings and thoughts. You’ve scrubbed yourself until your skin was so sensitive that even the touch of the towel has been painful — But maybe you deserved it.

The rest of the day is a blur, and you are not sure what time it is. You’ve spent hours on the bathroom’s floor, your left hand clenched around the picture while the right one was holding the towel. Your head was so empty, but so full at the same time. That’s how she found you when she came home that night, and if she had been tempted to wrap you in her arms when she saw your pitiful state, the conversation she just had with the others discouraged her to do so — You didn’t deserve her pity. They are right when they say that you are not the victim: you are the one that cheated on her, and she needs to be firm, stern. You knew how hard it is for the woman to trust someone and yet, you still broke the fate she had put in you after years of making her dream of a better future.

"Oh, so you remember now?" she coldly said to you when she entered the room. You didn’t move, not even your eyes to look at her, but if you did, you would have seen that the woman was leaning in the doorway with her arms crossed. Maybe you would have also seen that her coldness was only a facade, and that she was as close as you were from breaking down. 

You stayed silent, unable to say anything. The words were stuck in your clenched throat, and they aren’t feeling right anyway — How could you defend yourself when you didn't even know what happened exactly? Plus, you weren’t even sure there was something to defend, the pictures speaking for themselves. Even when she started packing your belongings, you didn’t move. For you to move, she had to grab your arm and drag you all the way outside the Avengers’s building by herself. 

She needed you gone, and everyone agreed that it was only for the best. At least for a few weeks, just the time for things to calm down. That’s what she came to announce. The few words that left your mouth were useless, your pleas falling in deaf ears: the decision had already been made, and the sentence was irrevocable. The woman is done with your bullshit. She is done with you, and so you are.

"The pictures, they- they aren't real," she eventually admitted, her voice being barely louder than a whisper as she unburdens herself of this old secret. “I mean, th- they are, but it’s a staging. Nothing happened between us, she- hm, loves you too much to give you away,” she continued, tears filling her eyes as she talks, her voice wavering a little more with each word. "She isn't even conscious in these," she continued when the spy didn’t react. If the black-haired woman thought it was because the other was listening, it was because she didn’t know how to react.

The weight of what she had done left her shoulder, and it was now lingering in the room, where the air was suddenly thick, and almost unbreathable. Natasha felt a weight in her chest that made each breath harder than the previous one. Overcome by surprise, she had let go of the other, stepping back a few steps. Her thoughts were racing, numerous and contradictory, they weren’t coherent enough to allow how to respond in any way. She needed to do something, but she didn’t know what.

“I- I don’t know why I did that. It wasn’t me, that night, you know that, right? That I would usually never ever do something like that,” she started to defend herself when she saw the look on Natasha’s face, “I was so angry, and disappointed, when she refused. I have given her everything since we met, and yet you are the one she chose. I thought that, maybe, with a bit of time she would eventually realize her mistake, … but I was so wrong,” she sighed, and the redhead could see the remnants of that anger in her attitude. A clenching jaw and fists, accompanied with firm words that left no doubt about the resentment she held towards her, and towards you. “That night, I- I wasn’t myself. We’ve already had a few drinks and, you know, it doesn’t mix well with emotions,” she continued, and the woman could feel her anger rising with every word the other spoke. “All I could think about was getting revenge. I wanted to show her she was wrong, that I had so much more to offer than she thought. I wanted her to change her mind, to see me for more than just a friend,” she admitted, her voice being just a whisper as she says the last sentence. “I never thought it would end this way, I swear, you’ve to believe me, Natasha,” and to forgive me. She didn’t say the last words out loud, but she doesn’t need to, her eyes are speaking for herself.

Only, when her gaze met the redhead’s, she didn’t see in her eyes the compassion she had been expecting, only pure hatred, an emotion that had quickly replaced the initial surprise. Not even a word was addressed to her as the other left the room, leaving her alone to dry her tears.

| MOODBOARD — ✧ — MASTERLIST — ✧ — TO SAY SOMETHING

| Part one. Part two. Part three. the scars in our hearts (bonus part).

| Taglist — @cd-4848, @chocolatestrawberrykryptonite, @gemz5, @jusnough, @m0nsterqzzz, @marvelwomenarehot0, @mrsrushman, @riyaexee, @takeyaki, @taliiiaasteria.

[shapelytimber]

Hellsing wives !!

the end of Hellsing is my roman empire

[PRINT] - [COMMISSIONS]

Bonus sketch, process and rambling below vvv

I don't usually share my sketches, but this one was cute :))

Hello welcome to my rambling zone, I have the bad habit of taking notes during the night because I'm an insomniac- enjoy ! And remember everything here is just my opinion written at 5am

I have a lot of conflicting feelings about Seras, because on one hand there is a lot I hate about her character :

-I *hate* her design. She is sexualized in a way that makes me really uncomfortable

-She is always the character that brings the worst part of the show (especially in the beginning) : the humor (and misogyny). She is treated as both the audience surrogate, and a comic relief, and that's a mix that do not work for me (and if you add the fact the humor doesn't make me laugh, and that she is more often than not treated as a pair of boobs and not a character- well it's hard for me to take her seriously)

-she was a cop (acab). And Alucard doesn't let me forget that because he calls her "police girl" the whole fucking show.... (But I can't complain about that because I kind of liked the pay off-)

-I find her romance with Pip boring (mainly because I find Pip boring I'm sorry), even tho I liked where it went. But if I find the man more interesting dead idk if that's a success.

-Her last apperance will always enrage me. After all her character growth, after you thought the writers *maybe* respected her a bit more..... One of the last thing you see from her is a panty shot. How to spit in my face for enjoying the ending ig

But on the other hand, despite all that.... The end of her character arc was kind of sick and she gets a lesbian ending lgkgkckgj so 5/10 character could be worse ig

But the shit that gets to me about all of that... is that I know Hellsing can pull off great women characters !! Integra is *right there* !!!

All of this to say I like doing fanart of mid medias I love because I get to fix some aspects of the original I didn't like <3

PS : I know Alucard is "dead" during the 30 years after the final, but you can decide if he is the dog or if they adopted a dog that reminded them of him :)

[tf2-in-my-head]

BANG tf2 steven universe

wanted to draw out a little scene using audio from su soooo heres this

and practice doodles

(tf2xsu au by @lenny-link !)

notes and rambles under cut

bonus points if you can guess the scenes these reference and also one of my mains from this (its engie) im a big fan of peridot and i saw peridot engineer……you know i gotta

i imagine with limb enhancers engineer is taller than a few of the mercs, but without them ends up being just a little shorter than scout like canon height, so scout pokes fun at him

anyways what led me to find out abt this au is the fact that its the top post in the engiespy tag because of the engiespy doodle there soooo expect more soon!!!! lapis blue spy uhh i think so

[danisdistant]

sunday ramble - music

[intro blog] | [taglist] | [masterlist]

★──────────★─────────★

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music somehow runs in the halovian blood. it’s natural for birds to sing and communicate to one another, and it can’t be helped that halovians like to as well.

robin for example, sings and spreads the word of the harmony. sunday on the other hand, the order and entire dreamscape is his symphony. while he himself isn’t skillful in music itself, he somehow bases off his work and goal off of music notes.

whenever you’re around the siblings, they sometimes can’t help themselves to express their emotions through song.

with sunday, he would often hum one of robin’s songs if he’s in a good mood. his humming is always calming and feels almost therapeutic in a way. you can’t help yourself but hum along with him.

in complete contrast, he’s more silent when he’s in a bad mood, usually because something popped up in the dreamscape. to cheer him up, you would hum (maybe even sing if you’re feeling confident enough) a simple tune that you learned from robin.

your voice would cause him to perk up, and his wings would slightly flutter here and there with every high note you hit. now, whenever he feels down, he pushes everything and his work away just to have some time to listen to your voice.

and in vice-versa, if you’re the one feeling down, sunday would try his best to cheer you up through his own music as well, even if he’s not great at it (it’s the thought that counts). he hums, and sometimes would sing childhood songs that he and robin would sing together.

it definitely makes you feel better, listening to his voice that sometimes crack. he’s a tad bit embarrassed that he can’t sing as well as he wants to, visually apparent with each time his wing flicks at the wrong note, or how he tries to hide his face behind his own wings. But you reassure him that he doesn’t have to even sing that well for him to cheer you up!

seriously, being able to listen to him sing is a privilege. no one else besides you and robin hear him sing, after all, he feels as though he’d make himself a fool if other people and the public heard his out of tune “chirping.”

if you like to sing in the shower, chances are sunday is also listening to you. he hums along your tune as he reads a book or works on some papers. when you come out, he would sometimes ask you to continue, something that would fluster you as you realize that he’s been listening all along.

even if you don’t think you sound that great to his sister, or any other professional singer, he still enjoys listening to you sing. and if you think you’re really that bad, much to sunday’s disagreement, he would ask his sister to help tutor you, something that you graciously accepted.

★──────────★─────────★

BONUS:

“Risee up into my! Woo~rld!” You sang, making sure to control your pitch, volume, and vibrato with each word. “Renew your definition~!” Continuing on with the chorus, Robin smiled, watching the product after a week of teaching and tutoring you upon your request.

“Woo~rld so high, let me sho~ow,” Sunday was watching along side Robin, clapping along as he smiled. “And hear my declaration… No more ties.~”

“Huff… How was that?”

“You did amazing, [Name]!” Robin cheered, clapping alongside her brother as he nodded in response. “Indeed. Your singing has definitely improved. I’m proud of you.”

“Thanks.” You ushered, looking to the side as you can’t help but blush in some form of embarrassment. If you were also a Halovian, you would have hid your face behind a pair of wings.

“How about a quick trip to Golden Hour for a snack? [Name] deserves some sort of reward for her impressive performance.” Sunday suggested, something that you graciously accepted.

“I’d love to join, but I have another recording session in a couple of minutes… Get me some Oak Cake Roll when you can brother!” Robin chirped as the two of you headed off.

Along the trip, neither of you could stop humming to Robin’s latest song.

★──────────★─────────★

[upmost-rylan]

S/O DATING THE CREEPYPASTAS *✧⁺˚⁺ପ(๑・ω・)੭ु⁾⁾

Author's note:

This was just supposed to be a #Rylan Rambles but u h I may have gone too far. So THIS IS MESSY SINCE I'VE NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE. so please don't expect anything good, I am good at art not story things.

T.w.:

for Eyeless Jack's part is cannibalism ofc

Jeff the killer

Jeff's type is very motherly like he loves a partner who's sweet but will basically drag him by the ear and lecture him for being a bitch. he is loving and sweet in his own way BUT you do have to have thick skin. at least for a while. he'll be throwing every insult in the book at you trying to get you away from him. he is scared of being vulnerable. So as he figures out his emotions it'll definitely be rough for a while and if you play into the "bit" and insulting him back, HE'D BE BLUSHING thinking you know how he feels. Be prepared since that'll be you two's love language! But for anyone who wants a relationship with this man there will definitely be some obstacles with him not being able to properly communicate his emotions in a healthy manner, his anger issues, the fact that this is probably his first ever relationship so it'll be rocky no matter what you do. But when you get over those obstacles and you are still there holding his hand with a smile you'll have a boyfriend FOR LIFE. Also become a sweetheart for those who love the idea of Jeff being soft to his partner.

Eyeless jack

His type to me personally is someone who treats him like he is a normal human being. That's it that's the one thing that'll make him fall head over heels in LOVE with you. But bonus points if you like to crack jokes and puns those ALWAYS make him laugh! He is a simple demon. However, THIS relationship is very much a MESS for at least the first half of it, you're in a relationship with a giant fluffy demon who eats human flesh did you expect it to be normal? This relationship is definitely a game of tug of war of him wanting to basically make you his dinner and wanting to keep you around because he loves you. You'd have to walk a really thin line to make sure this demon doesn't take one of your kidneys. But after a LONG while he'd start to actually act normal for the MOST part. Listen, I love to imagine this guy to be VERY creaturely. you know this if you have seen my design of him after a one or two years of being around you and not eating you; he leave a corpse (whether it's human or animal up to you) at your door like it's some gift from one giant cat.

Tim Wright/Masky

Tim/Masky's type is very "wife"-like if that makes sense (I headcanon him to be Bi-romantic Ace-spec so gender doesn't matter) like Tim to me loves the idea of having the white picit fence dream! it lets him feel like he's normal even for abit. Loves the idea of coming home from work to hug his partner from behind as he watches them cook dinner. Very domestic very demure. To most he's a pretty rough guy considering Masky but to me he's definitely a softy. compliment him and he'll be putty in your hands. 10/10 would 10000% smooch. But you two definitely sometimes have some trouble especially when Masky takes over. With that one YOU WILL N O T be able to sleep. every time you try to sleep be prepared to be shaken awake because masky finds it funny to startle you awake.

Brian Thomas/Hoodie

Listen we had Tim now we gotta do Brian, THEY ARE TWO PEAS IN A BOD YALL👏. His type to me personally is just a funny good vibes person, who loves being on the go and not in one place for too long. Now, this relationship is basically MADE OUT OF POSITIVE VIBES. Brian to me is definitely the type to praise his partner AT ALL HOURS OF THE DAY he is a absolute sweetheart. You'd also definitely love him if you like nature walks and hikes. You definitely had to be the first to confess though because if you didn't this situation would definitely be just mutual pining. Also definitely the type to always be following behind his partner since I like to think bro is a TALL man, he wants you to see whats Infront of you and not block the way. His nickname for his partner something nature relationship "duckling" "lil mushroom" "sunshine" or something similar!

[mintiicinnamonii]

Hii! I saw that you’re requests were open and had a cool idea, Monkey King and Macaque (seperate) x Reader that likes to write songs about them?

notes: AAA THIS IS SO CUTE!!! i had fun with this <3 trying to get back in the requests swing; i just got back from vacation lol

I’d Rather Be Me (With You)

Macaque

this man is SMITTEN.

as you sing to him hes softly smiling and blushing

bonus if its a picnic date

he loves theatre, so this warms his heart

he adores you so much <33

if you perform a specific love song for him on stage, then hes GONE

”this song goes out to my beloved. i love you mac.”

you dont even have to be a performer, maybe even a kareoke bar or something, and hes flustered.

he finds your voice so calming, and its just the right volume so his six ears wont be disturbed by the noise

he has a rough day? you sing to him and hes out like a light

Wukong

hes way more.. OBVIOUS about his love for you

when you sing to him, his tail is in a lil heart and hes bouncing up and down and smiling and blushing and he looks like hes about to explode with joy

as a man who already gets excited when he hears your voice, when your oretty voice specifically talks about HIM hes GONE

if you perform for people, he’ll be in the crowd like “I LOVE YOU PEACHESSS MWAHHH”

”this goes out to my beloved wukong. i love you”

“ I LOVE YOU TOOOOOOO-“ (he passes out on the floor)

he rambles to the monkey about your singing (they love it too)

the second you sing, all the monkeys in FFF go running like a moth to a lightbulb

[seraphmeraph]

hi!! i recently found ur account while scrounging thru the bi han tag (theres so little bi han x reader fics 😭) and i love ur writing so i was wondering if you could do a bi han x princess reader? maybe the lin kuei made some kind of alliance with a king and he falls jn love (or lust) with his daughter? idk if that makes a lot of sense lolll. anyways thank u and i love ur work!!

i gen never expected people to really like Bi Han that much

Bi Han x Princess Reader

MK1 short story with smut at the end starring guess who?? BI HAN <3

TW: 18+, smut at end, fingering, praises, suggestive, boobs, Bi Hans not as degrading, forbidden love

A/N: mb for this shittiness anon i tried LMAO- I feel like by now everybody should know i dead just don't proofread

Your father, the kind, wanted to strengthen his kingdom's defenses. So, to achieve this, he proposed an alliance with the enigmatic Lin Kuei.

You first met Bi Han at a banquet to congratulate your alliance. Your father introduced him to you as the Grandmaster of the Lin Kuei. You couldn't help but feel attracted to his cold and rough attitude, not to mention how handsome he was.

Bi Han's heart fluttered when he saw you, but he tried to push it deep away, feeling unfamiliar with this feeling. But as time passed, he couldn't help but try to be closer to you. He wanted to hear your rambles and see your beautiful eyes and elegance.

He would purposefully run into you, planning and taking notes on locations you would stop by. One of these is the royal garden, where you'd take a walk every day. Slowly, you noticed how often you would see the Grandmaster. You found it unusual, but you didn't mind his presence.

Slowly, it went from seeing each other to striking up conversations with him. He would often give you advice for your duties as a princess.

As you two grew closer, you would often find yourself openly complimenting him and subtly flirting.

"I'm aware you're a cryomancer, but does your heart ever get cold? Maybe my presence can warm it," You spoke, gaining a little smile from him. It was the first time you had ever seen him smile, and it made the butterflies in your stomach go crazy.

Considering he's unfamiliar, you are likely the first to admit your feelings. You asked him to meet you in the royal garden at night, and when he showed up, you began confessing.

The garden was very serene and peaceful. The moon cast a pale, silvery light over the garden, illuminating the flowers and trees. It was filled with the sweet fragrance of the blooming flowers. The pathway was dimly lit with the soft glowing lanterns, casting a warm and inviting light onto you both.

"Princess," He greeted you with a bow. "Is there a reason you requested to see me this belatedly at night?" He questioned, his voice gruff, but his eyes betrayed him.

"Yes…" You took a deep breath. "Grandmaster, I believe I'm in love with you," You admitted, wasting no time admitting your feelings. Though you were nervous, you were also confident.

"Princess…" He trailed off, unsure what to say.

You stepped closer to him, feeling your heart beating faster with anticipation. "Please, don't say anything if you don't feel the same way. I just had to tell you how I feel," You said, trying to hide your disappointment.

But before you could leave him, he pulled you in and kissed you. He backed you into one of the pillars, pressing your back against it. The kiss became passionate. All his pent-up lust for you is pouring out now. His cold hands were going to cup your cheek.

Your love was forbidden, a princess with a Lin Kuei assassin? Not to mention, you were the next heir to the throne. Your father would prohibit you from ever seeing Bi Han again and most likely change the relationship between your kingdom and the Lin Kuei.

A secret relationship between you both blossomed. Bi Han would often meet you in your chambers or the garden. Occasionally, he would convince your father that he was best fit to guard you whenever you had events.

BONUS

You would leave your balcony window open for Bi Han to climb through at night. This was one of the nights when Bi Han visited you.

"Grandmaster!" You almost exclaimed, getting up off your bed to see him closer.

"Bi Han," He corrected you with a slight smirk.

"Sorry," You giggled, taking hold of his hand and bringing it to your cheek. His excellent hands felt cold against your warm cheek. "I missed you, Bi Han," You smiled, looking up at him.

His thumb grazed your cheek as you continued to hold it. "I did too, my princess," He spoke, leaning over to kiss you.

His lips pressed against yours, and you both were locked into a fiery kiss. Bi Han's other hand gripped your waist, pulling you deeply into the kiss. His tongue grazed your bottom lip, gaining entry into your mouth.

Bi Han couldn't contain his desire anymore. Pulling away from you, he threw you over his shoulder, carrying you over to your bed. You giggled at his roughness and kicked your legs, but he easily held them in place.

He threw you down on the bed, got on top of you, and continued your kiss. One of his hands gripped your thigh, pushing up your nightgown just enough to expose your panties.

Your hands went up to his hair, fingers reaching his bun. You quickly undid it, letting his hair down.

He pulled away from the kiss again, pinning your hands above your head. His hair fell around his shoulders.

"You're so handsome with your hair down," You looked at him lovingly.

"Is that so?" He spoke, his hand trailed closer to your core.

You couldn't help but shiver, feeling his cold fingers touch the sensitive part of your thigh. He then let go of your hand, using both to pull the nightgown over your head.

You sigh softly, feeling Bi Han's hands run over your body. His lips followed down your body, stopping to give your breasts extra attention. Rubbing your nipple in between his fingers while sucking the other one. His eyes looked up at you, watching as your face contorted into one of pleasure.

His hand slid down to your stomach, holding you in place as he kissed your body.

"Tell me, do I have your approval, Princess?" He said teasingly, smirking.

"Yes-Yes," You babbled, running your hand through his long hair.

He pulled your panties off, and his thumb massaged your clit as the other hand spread your thighs further apart.

You bit your bottom lip, keeping your legs open for Bi Han.

He inserted two digits into your heat, the cold of his fingers giving you goosebumps. He began pistoning his fingers in and out of you at a fast pace, not giving you any warning.

"Bi-Bi Han!" You grabbed at his shoulders as he continued his assault on your pussy.

"Tell me how you feel, pretty girl," He spoke, his eyes never leaving your face, obsessed with your reactions.

Let's hope you don't wake the whole castle up.

[aquasarsstuff]

Valentines Day gone wrong, ft. Lilia Vanrouge x gn!reader

Author's note: I feel like there's not much Lilia fic or I literally just read all them. Anyway, content for me to satiate my simping self because he came home 3x when I pulled for him on the stitch event banner. (This more like me trying to revive my passion in writing after moving on from my cringe writing phase.

If there were any word you would use to describe Lilia Vanrouge, a 3rd year from Diasomnia, he would be close to eccentric. His reactions to things were unpredictable, though that was the reason why your troubles has lessen this past few days. He would randomly appear randomly or sometimes when chaos was about to ensue between your first year friend. While you were anxious of the tension, Lilia just smiles, amuse at the situation and doesn't even seem bothered about it. Nevertheless, before he even leaves, he gives you advices, though some of it were questionable, parts of it we're pretty helpful when it comes to handling Grim and the Adeuce duo. And here you are troubled with another thing.

You've heard of a festivity celebrated here in Twisted Wonderland while Rook was busy rambling about Vil. It was called Valentines Day. You only have a pretty limited information about it, but all you knew is it's about giving gift as a form of gratitude. You already have gifts in mind to give to your friends, and since you have gotten pretty close to Lilia, you've been thinking of also giving him a gift.

---

Well, this shouldn't be hard at all. You know Lilia's love for sweets so you decided to pick a box of chocolate for him from Sam's shop. It was wrap neatly in a red cloth with a golden ribbon. Holding it close to your chest, you silently recite the words you'll tell him when you give this to him, but looks like you don't need to do that.

You almost smack yourself to the ground when Lilia appeared infront of you, hanging upside-down on a branch of a tree around campus. He laughs at your reaction, as usual, though it morphs into a smirk after seeing the parcel in your hand. You gulped hard at seeing that expression, out of all the time he has to make that face, does it really have to be now. You suddenly feel embarrassment creep up your face.

"Having trouble finding someone? I can help with that," He says before jumping down and properly facing you. "Or just uncertain about the gift? I have a lot of recipes in mind-"

Your mind turned into utter horror after hearing his next words. You've already heard of his infamous reputation so you already stop him. "No. I," You sighed.

"I was looking for you."

"Ohoho? May I inquire why?"

"This is for you," You handed him the gift as calmly as you could. His eyes slightly widen. Those crimson doe eyes look at you unblinking that it was almost adorable if it weren't for the fact that his face was morphing to that one every time he starts to tease you for something.

"This is my gratitude for last week, Lilia. If it weren't for you I would probably get another earful from the Headmaster. When you are with me, It's like the world is painted in vibrant colors. Happy Valentines day, Lilia. I hope you like my gift for you." You walk away from him before he could say another word. When he was already out of sight, you ran to your next class while covering your face. When you reach your seat, your friends huddled around you like bees. Seeing your flustered face, you were bombarded with questions about being sick.

"Im fine guys, really," you said, brushing off all of their words. Your friends however didn't believe the reassurance you gave them, but stop pestering you after Trein entered the room. It was only then that you notice how strong and fast your heartbeat was. You probably shouldn't have run that long earlier, under the heat of the sun.

___

Bonus:

Later that night, Malleus came to visit and he bluntly ask about the gift you have given Lilia. Apparently, the mischievous bat has been bragging it to his sons. You sighed, before remembering that you have also prepared a gift for him. You ask Malleus to stay outside for moment. When you handed him the gift, he was silent.

Malleus: Prefect tell me, do you really understand what this day means?

You then proceed to tell him what you know. Instantly, it clicks to Malleus and he laughs whole heartedly.

Safe to say, you tried to avoid Lilia for the whole week. (keyword: tried)

-----

I dedicate my 2nd fic to @hanafubukki. Hi, I'm a big fan of you and Lilia ehe. Okay, but no way I'm reading this again. The idea was delicious, but after writing it, my perfectionist self just decide to possess me and now its cringe. Btw to all my readers, I hope you enjoy this.

[the-dragon-girl-27]

Since im in a dino mood:

today on old art i never posted here's some conepts I made like a year or two ago

so like the 2 most fun things to draw are dinosaurs and anime girls so I had a galaxy brain moment and decided to design some dinosaur magical girls (plus evil T-rex villian lady)

so like hear me out so the girls would do magical girl transformations to fight evil dino girls and then it would be like power rangers where after they are defeated once they come back in their dinosaur form and then the girls have a second magical girl transformation where they would turn into their dinosaur forms (and like power rangers there's no reason they don't do this from the start other than just because)

I didn't actually do anything with this concept but like it is a banger concept still

bonus: concept art and more rambling

each girl was designed with a color in mind and i tried to get a variety of dinos (originally the Yi Qi girl was a microraptor hence the 4 wings in her hair but it felt to similar to velociraptor so i went for a different flying dino) velociraptor girl would be protag kun. The last 4 would be like characters who join the group later with the the pachycephalosaurs girl being an anti hero and the Gallimimus and Yutyrannus girl straight up starting as a villians

i wrote like 2 scenes in my head one where Yutyrannus girl betrays and fights evil T rex lady and its a cool tyrannosaur vs tyrannosaur fight and one where velociraptor girl and gallimimus girl talk about something and i ship them for it (so like gallimimus girl is self concious that gallimimus isnt a traditionally like cool dino but raptor girl cheers her up and then gallimimus girl joins the good guys)

also side note that Yutyrannus girl might be one of my best character designs ever lol (I also gave her the most clever name for an OC I've done so like her name would be Yukiko because it starts with a "yu" like Yutyrannus but also yuki = snow and Yutyrannus is accociated with snow)

for the record i forgot what i named the rest

anyway yeah i never did anything with this concept depite how galaxy brain it is lmfao