#z's personal undates

[callsigns-haze]

Another announcement yet again

Two this week huh?! Probs not the best thing ever but yet here we are.

Tbh I don't think I have left too many things lying out unfinished I might delete one of my series and you know I was only one part in and not much attention either so no big deal.

I did post like a little peak of one but it's fine. That can wait or just never happen.

I have exams coming up soon and won't have any time to post anything but in fairness I feel like I'll be around here till the end of this month then I'll probably pull what I did from April to June but this time I'll probably be gone most of the time for possible 6 months maybe?!

I'll still be posting some fics if I have time. I'm about to close my requests because I won't have time. My exams are in January and then again in June and these go on my cert so this matters a lot to me.

Tbh some of my things don't even get acknowledged around here anymore so let me be honest this will be a small change to your blogging life.

I go back to sports in two weeks so then I'll be busy 24/7 and studying matters to me this year, a lot.

I've also been feeling really sick recently so this is not making anything better. I'm out of my hand brace and finger splints but still don't feel all nice and fuzzy.

Here's the real shit.

I have really bad anxiety. Like absolutely shit.

Over the period of my whole life I have ended up in hospital due to severe panic attacks and other issues.

It sucks how these things come back huh?

I was talking today with one of my friends Maria that last year was the worst year for me with my attacks but this year they seemed to calm down. In the month of September I would say I only had like 3.

I spoke about this to my doctor and she said maybe it's because I can do sports so I'm calm or maybe I found a better routine. Then why do I feel so shit on my day off?

I just had a conversation with a mutual and currently I'm legit on the edge like all this trauma and shit just flooded back and is sitting on my chest and yet I can't do shit about it.

Last year on the third of October someone passed away that was somewhat involved with me but that's nothing relevant to me or what I feel.

People on this very app ruined my experience at the end of last year and I was close to another attempt.

But right now out of September I only had 3 panic attacks that month I had 4 today and it's the first of fucking October.

Am I sobbing currently yes. I can't control it anymore. I don't want to have to keep on writing more as right now it doesn't please me.

My writing isn't so great in the first place. My first language was polish and I only started to get English properly by 8 so I see where my fics do not have the best range.

I really wanted to reach 1k followers by the end of this year but there's nothing to go off on anymore.

I will be online for a bit and I will be DM people I like to text but mostly don't be surprised if I don't answer too much. I'm not in a good space at all.

I'll probably be doing a bunch of rants on my blog and if you don't want to see it just don't read or just ignore.

I need the trauma to fucking go away but I'm shit at talking.

[twobluejeans]

HEARTBREAK ON TOUR!

charles leclerc x famous!reader

summary: in which the lavender haze has been lifted. or in which america’s it couple splits.

part 9:foreign affairs, series masterlist

faceclaim: madison beer

ally’s radio 📻: PART 9! anyways, stan y/n l/n for clear skin and good grades!✨😌

INSTAGRAM, july 18

liked by carlossainz, landonoriss, and 12,654,234 others

yourinstagram mood :') gonna cry all day lol. thank you for your warmth. thank you for listening n hearing me. i love you.

View all 64,627 comments

ntltcy/n whoever said the second slide is so real

danielricciardo I said what I said

zendaya ma’am is taking up all 10 spots on the 10 ten…that’s my best friend ❤️!!!

channeleclerc16_ she should just stick to acting…

beyonce well deserved! the song brought actual tears to my eyes

 yourinstagram beyonce  screaming crying shaking…thank u, i love u always

leclerc_pascale beautiful girl congrats

 yourinstagram leclerc_pascale  thank u mama

drewstarkey on repeat i fear 

ferarrileclerc i mean ... since the song is about charles that means he got another number one hit! charles congrats baby!

harrystyles A beautiful song from an even more beautiful person. Congratulations, Y/n/n—H.

ypurinstagram thank u sweet angel. miss you!

redlipclassicy/n harrystyles yourinstagram WHAT THE FUCK

JULY 18, 2023

Lola Ransdell Under Fire for Using the N-Word in Resurfaced Tweets

Not a good look.

BY ALLY JULY 17, 2023 11:15 AM

Lola Randell has some explaining to do. The 25-year-old came under fire on Sunday when Twitter users began resurfacing tweets of the model using the N-word in 2020. The receipts included direct messages and Instagram comments, in which Ransdell called her friends the racial slur, as well as tweets from Ransdell claiming that she could use the N-word because she’s “not white.”

In screenshots resurfaced by the Twitter PopHub, Ransdell can be seen calling someone an “ugly” N-word. The screenshots also include a group chat with some of her friends, in which she is called out for using the N-word. In her response, Randell explains that she can use the derogatory term because she’s not white. (Ransdell’s mother is Brazilian, but that still does not excuse her behavior.) “I’m not white tho so that’s awk,” Ransdell responded.

However, the receipts don’t end there. Along with the first screenshots, some users also resurfaced other old tweets, in which Ransdell said that she returned a “different race” after she spent some time tanning in Florida. (She accompanied the tweet with an emoji of a man with a turban.) Another screenshot also shows Ransdell liking a 2020 meme comparing Jay-Z to a Ransdell. One user also claimed to have a video of Ransdell rapping the N-word, though the audio is unclear.

Ransdell allegedly once tweeted, "leaving to Florida white but coming back to NY a different Race." The statement was accompanied by an emoji of a white blonde man and an emoji of a darker-skinned man wearing a turban.

A post from 2019 read, "With @chanteljefferies and that awkward moment when ur at a Chinese restaurant and your waiter isn't Chinese...."

The following year, she allegedly threatened, "Shut up before I smack you back to your own country!"

Screenshots also show the youtuber allegedly liking an Instagram post from 2018 about how only men and women should marry because the Bible says so.

Then there are the women-hating posts.

Ransdell allegedly liked an undated Instagram post showing a photo of Selena Gomez that posed the question, "Would you smack her for $835 BILLION?!" The person whose reply was featured in the meme read, "I'd smack her for a sweet tea from McDonald's."

In 2018, Ransdell allegedly tweeted about transgendered women" being "wicked slutty."

She's also been accused of openly hating on her boyfriend’s former partner, Y/n L/n.

Once a fan of Charles (and even of Charles and Y/n together), Ransdell  seemingly turned on the 26-year-old singer when "Your/Ship/Name" was on the rocks.She allegedly once followed a Y/n L/n  hate account on Instagram and allegedly favorited/liked a tweet from 2022 that showed a picture of Y/n and read, "She collects guys as if they were infinity stones."

How these receipts surfaced is unclear (many of them are private messages between Ransdell and her friends, so someone must have leaked them on the internet), but it’s certain that people aren’t happy with Ransdell using slur, even as a joke. After the tweets resurfaced, many users took to Twitter to call out Ransdell for her offensive behavior, as well as demand accountability and an apology from her and her Formula One boyfriend, Charles Leclerc. 

SEE MORE RELATED POSTS:

• Charles Leclerc finally addresses messy breakup with Singer Y/n L/n.

•Harry Styles just commented on Y/n L/n’s Instagram post for the first time in 7 years.

• Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince: Harry Styles and Y/n L/n’s relationship timeline

INSTAGRAM, july 18

liked by f1wh0re, corneliastreety/n, and 546,782 others

y/naflorals CHAR!ES SPEAKING ABOUT MOTHER TODAY IN AN INTERVIEW

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dressy/n no comment.

lewismercedes ur joe king…ur joe. king.

leclerc16charles as a charles fan…idk either i’m sorry

TWITTER, july 18

INSTAGRAM STORIES, july 18

yourinstagram 9m

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TWITTER, july 18

ally’s radio 📻:i don’t like this chapter 😞. also pls know that anything that was mentioned within lola’s article is not something i condone!! pls don’t think i’m a bad person, it’s literally only just for the plot😭!! i got inspo off of hailey biebers old tweets sooo. if u see ur username but u weren’t tagged, it’s bc tumblr wouldn’t let me :( if u asked me to tag u and i didn’t, pls send me a message or inbox me bc it might’ve gotten lost 😭 i try to stay up-to-date but sometimes i miss people so pls lmk!!!

taglist 🦢🪩: @incoherenciass@dakotali@405rry@topaz125@sassyheroneckgiant@hevburn@itsmytimetoodream@ivegotparticulartaste@crowdedimagines @asterianax @haydee5010@scenesofobx@christinabae@magical-spit@dessxoxsworld@myareadsbooks@honethatty12@hopefulinlove@diasnohibng@gentlemonsterjennie1@hummusxx@eugene-emt-roe@taestrwbrry @perjarma @cxcewg@chimchimjiminie16@glow-ish@allywthsr @millyswife@mrsmaybank13@black-swan-blog27 @stargaryenx@lilsiz@ohthemisssery@leclerclvr@slytherinjimin3nthusiast@shessthunderstoms@cool-ultra-nerd@ncentic@playboykenz @canvashearts @tinyhrry @xeliaaaa @ifionlywould @gaviypedrisbride @callsignwindow @dhhdhsiavdhaj@chasing-liberosis@laneyspaulding19@a-daydreamersday@saikikusouswife@motorsp0rt@lifesuckslife@shessthunderstoms@drewsandsebastianswife @sainzluvrr@ietss @agustdlvr @sarahkaliii @sweethoneyblossom1@sticksdoesart @ayoanna @c0wgirlswag @ifionlywould @l1ghtaura @ellesmythe @avada-kedavra-bitch-187

[cartoonrival]

what i think is so goddamn frustrating is that its not as if i think im the only single person left in the world, cuz theres a million articles and videos with people talking about how gen z is way less dating-oriented than generations before us. the explanation for why that is varies from source to source, some think its bc we're too online or cuz we're too poor or cuz we're perfectionists or whatever the hell else, and that's fine even though none of that is why. but like every thing you find about how to deal with being single! why are we all single! how to feel better about being single! how to stop being single! are so. fucking. cisnormative 😭😭 like i absolutely cannot describe the emotion of recognizing that my transness makes me nigh undateable and on top of that there is literally no recourse for that because the only conversations happening about how much it sucks to be totally undesirable are being had by cis men who hate women and cis women who, godbless, though their hearts are in better places, have totally unrelatable experiences. and so fucking much about loving yourself as a trans person seems to be about community! what do i do when there is none! what do i do when there is nothing! what do i do!!!!

[copperbadge]

Look you guys the world is hard enough without Quartz, a business news service I pay actual real world dollars for, dropping this kind of shit in my inbox with no warning. And then I opened the email and was personally punched in the face. 

From a UX standpoint, Tumblr is unpleasant—its app is buggy, its site search tool near useless, and its ad-targeting engine barely functional. The feed is chronological, posts are undated, and users are pseudonymous. And yet those users still (affectionately) call Tumblr their favorite hellsite (Tumblr staff included).

Tumblr’s clunkiness is a feature, not a bug. And after nearly a decade of running on fumes, the site is now crawling out of obscurity. Over the course of the pandemic, Gen Z flocked to Tumblr; as of early 2022, 61% of its new users, and nearly half of its active users, are under 24. Tumblr today has more daily active users than WordPress, its professional sibling, has per month, according to a spokesperson. Revenue has also reportedly jumped by 55% since July 2021.

Children, I welcome you, I’m not upset you’re here, I’m just being terrorized by a subscription news service.

[antiterf]

TERFs talk about desexualizing people as if its just whining about not finding a partner and not a removal of something that our cultural sees as crucial to our humanity and takes part in our dehumanization.

(Desexualizing is basically taking away the thought that someone can or be sexual and/or removing the sexual quality of someone).

There was a study going around that said a large percentage of the population wouldn't date trans people. It was going around with terfs, and most of them made fun of it.

It was this one: "Across a sample of heterosexual, lesbian, gay, bisexual, queer, and trans individuals, 87.5% indicated that they would not consider dating a trans person"

We're told that our bodies are too gross to have sexual relations with. Our genitalia works differently with HRT, and its described as disgusting and unattractive. We're talked to about our genitalia by transphobic assholes randomly and out of the blue, like our private parts aren't even private.

Complaints about this are shoved to the side because "I don't Have to date or have sex with Anyone"

No, you don't! But thats not the fucking point!

The point is addressing the stigma that comes with being transgender and the stigma around trans bodies. It has little to nothing to do with you besides asking why you have so much hatred and disgust for bodies that are different than yours.

And before I get ridiculous remarks like "because you're forcing people to date sexes that their not attracted to!" I've seen these comments applied to dating trans people when that person would date them if they never transitioned. I've seen bi people say that they don't want to date trans people because of our bodies.

And the main reason why I am using the term bodies and not sex characteristics, is because desexualization isn't exclusive to trans people. I was ignorant to desexualization being an actual Thing until hearing about it talked about with disabled people. In fact, you know that stat earlier about only dating trans people?

"A 2008 poll for the Observer found that 70% of those surveyed would not have sex with a disabled person." Please tell me you wouldn't make fun of that and call us disabled people incels because we pointed this out. Heres something more recent to point out that disabled people are less desirable in romantic relationships as a whole. To fit more with the overall dating comparison.

And I may not be intersex, but God, do you know how shitty it must feel to hear about how you're not as good as cis perisex people because you have different sex characteristics? Trans people are not the only ones with different hormone levels or different genitalia, yet thats whats mentioned when someone would never want to date a trans person. Those things can and do apply to intersex individuals as well on top of their own struggles with desexualization.

Tldr: Complaining about relationship barriers isn't something "people who need to feel like they're oppressed" do. Its an actual issue that affects more than just trans people. Don't dismiss it.

[fandomcrysismoves]

Demon bros getting made into a meme

So my friends and i love to make memes out of pics we sent or only we understand, so that’s the concept. I’ll do the undateables too and a few meme post of what a chaotic gen z mc would send into the gc with the demon bros and the undateables.

Lucifer:

- If it’s a meme laughing at him, he won’t be happy and will probably punish you (and NOT the good way) for sending this to a group chat with Diavolo in it (which is valid you are sending memes making fun of him to his boss basically).

- Also he WILL murder you if you make Lucifer x Diavolo memes.

- If it’s a meme that is made of a picture of him, but other than that has nothing to do with him, it depends. If it’s a picture that is just him being tired of his brothers shit or something like that and the meme is funny, he will be slightly amused. If it’s a picture he doesn’t like he will be mad but not as mad as if you were making fun of him.

- He would never make a meme, he doesn’t understand the purpose of them and he doesn’t have time.

- So all in all you have to be careful with the kinds of memes you send in the group chat if you don’t want to anger Lucifer. He can take a bit of calling out for example about him trying to kill you twice, but be careful.

Mammon:

- If it’s a meme making fun of him he won’t be too happy but he’ll deal with it. But if you make more than like 2-3 memes about him for example being greedy or stealing he will be sad, that his human thinks about him this way.

- He’s used to being bullied by his brothers, but you saying this hurts him a lot more. Please keep the Mammon calling out to the minimum, just a few memes here and there.

- A good way to make sure you don’t hurt him by calling him out is by making memes praising him, like about his self control and patience or just go and hunt him down to cuddle, and to make sure he knows that you see him as more than his sin.

- If you make a meme that has him as the template and not the content then: case a.) he will boast about you choosing a nice pic of him because he is the best or case b.) throw a bit of a tantrum if the pic of him is not a good one.

- He would try to make memes because you like them but it would take a bit of time til he gets them.

- So Mammon takes the memes well but be careful to not hurt his feelings because he is baby.

Leviathan:

- Oh boy this boy is sooo insecure please don’t call him out in memes, just like really slightly joke about him being in his room all day.

- If he is made fun of by his Henry he will feel really bad and self depricate really bad, like his self esteem will go to the negatives.

- If he is the template he will be glad if it’s a good and funny pic of him but if it’s not he will self depricate again.

- Make memes of him being good at games and he will give you his gamer boy bath water for free.

- Making memes about him being an otaku and spending a fuck ton of money on merch is a okay (just don’t make too much because he will think that you see him as just a yucky otaku).

- He would be the biggest memer in the group chat, him and MC would be THE memers.

- Levi can take a joke unless it hits where it hurts in that case he will be the one who gets affected by it the most.

Satan:

- Satan won’t take it to heart if you joke about his anger issues if you don’t over do it, just like his brothers he will think you only think if him as an angry demon. He is more than his sin and it would break his heart if the only human he cares about wouldn’t see that, especially when he’s working so hard on being his own person l, not Lucifer 2 or THE avatar of wrath.

- But what he won’t stand and will get angry about is if you make memes about him being like Lucifer he does his best to get away from his father brother’s image so don’t joke about that.

- If you use him as a template he won’t mind, if you managed to catch a photo of him being angry he will even be impressed (a bit concerned too that instead of running you pulled out your phone and took photos).

- Satan would rarely make memes but if he does he makes a bunch at the same time mocking Lucifer.

- Satan is confident enough to not be bothered by jokes so over all he’s pretty chill.

Asmodeus:

- Asmodeus won’t mind you making fun of him just like Satan he has enough confidence to not care.

- But what he won’t like is if you make a meme undermining his beauty or saying that someone else is better looking. It won’t affect his self esteem or anything but he will be a bit mad and throw a tantrum.

- If he is a template he will brag that you used him because he is perfect.

- He would only make memes if he wants to mock one of his brothers.

- Probably Asmo takes the memes best out of all of the brothers.

Beelzebub:

- He’d be chill too with memes about him but (I keep repeating myself sorry) if you only make memes about him always eating, he would feel like you only see him as a useless glutton (please don’t make this baby sad 🥺🥺🥺).

- He doesn’t mind being a meme template, if it brings you so much joy then he’ll be glad he could make you smile.

- He would really rarely make memes but if Beel makes a meme about you, oh boy you are destroyed.

- In conclusion Beel just likes to make you smile.

Belphegor:

- He wouldn’t really care about memes of him, he rarely looks at the group chat as is (it has Diavolo so he’s not interested), so he wouldn’t even see them probably.

- Him as a meme template would be the same (you know there is a picture of him sleeping through Satan destroying the whole room that they are in).

- MC would have to explain memes to him and he would really enjoy them and would lowkey become a meme lord.

- He only makes memes if Satan texts him to back him up in mocking Lucifer.

- So Belphie doesn’t really mind the memes or more like don’t care about them at all, if you want him to see a meme send it to him directly or message him to look at the gc.

A/n: I should’ve posted this ages ago but I was too lazy to reread it and make sure it’s coherent. Sorry, I’ll try to make the undateables faster and some memes are done already.

[gaetoeinhaler]

Obey Me! Book Fic Masterlist

𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲 || satan x reader [book 1]

a new family moves in next to the brother's house. he didn't think he'd end up in the situation he was in right now. crying, in the hospital, alone, listening to the monitor beeping continuously. he was hurting. not physically, but mentally.

diavolo and asmodeus told him about the feelings he had been feeling for the new girl, but he didn't want to believe it.

sure, when they first met, it was unexpected. he didn't know what she was going through. then, as they slowly progressed and became friends, it seemed as if everything in life was amazing. he was starting tolerate his brother lucifer, and other people.

until one night, it all went down hill. the night of their first date. he learned the truth. the truth of what she was really going through.

he was loosing the person he loved most, more than anything else. because of a disease she was born with.

chapter 1 | 𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠

chapter 2 | 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠

chapter 3 | 𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐬

chapter 4 | 𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦

chapter 5 | 𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐥𝐞

chapter 6 | 𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐛𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐡

chapter 7 | 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬

chapter 8 | 𝐜𝐚𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐟𝐞

chapter 9 | 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐞

chapter 10 | 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞

chapter 11 | 𝐮𝐧𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞

chapter 12 | 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐛𝐲𝐞

second chance || satan x reader [book 2]

his family thought he was crazy. seeing her again. his deceased lover. was he really crazy? he saw her, right there, in front of her.

curious, he grew on to get to know her. she wasn't exactly the same, but, she was alike. like a twin, but different. it was as if she never left. he was afraid to love again, not wanting to be deemed as unloyal to his past partner. but, one dream changed it all. he left his old life behind.

he left his old life on pause. like a book, opened, with a bookmark amongst the pages, but never left again. only for a new book to be opened. he learned to love again. to be himself. to feel what it was like to have someone to love you and to love someone you have.

new adventures were born. new life. a new story.

chapter 1 | 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞

loyalty || barbatos x reader

after her older brother's death, she had no choice but to become the new heir. her brother never acquired a lover, and died without one. with only lucifer, his brothers, barbatos, diavolo's castle, and all of devildom to rule over, the new queen finding it hard.

with everything she began to love to leave her one by one, she's left with only her loyal butler ; barbatos. she never meant to fall in love with him, but with him around, she couldn't help but bring herself to learn to love again.

to learn to love him.

chapter 1 | 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭

chapter 2 | 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬

chapter 3 | 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐢𝐬

chapter 4 | 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐞

chapter 5 | 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞

chapter 6 | 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞

chapter 7 | 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐝𝐞

chapter 8 | 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞

together || belphegor x reader

partners in crime, is what they were. they'd commit crimes no police has ever seen before.

from gruesome deaths to unexplained escapes, they were able to do anything together. from school shootings, taking in hostages, torturing souls of those who will slowly become insane, they got away with it all.

with a mastermind and clever human, to a dangerous and committed demon, they could do anything they put their minds to.

even his brothers joined in. not only them, but two of devildom's other most powerful demons. having pacts with them all, some of the seven most powerful forces ever, helped with their crimes.

though, she held a deeper connection with one of the seven demons. the seventh, avatar of sloth, belphegor. and he, in his own way, was connected with her. from physical to mental, he was her closest demon.

and with those two together. they did anything they pleased.

chapter 1 | 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬

chapter 2 | 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧

a new light || undateables x reader

chapter 1 | 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐝

meme culture | obey me x gen z reader

when Diavolo's new exchange student ends up being what she classified herself as a 'clown escaped from the circus disguised as a gen z', the demons and angels have no clue what to say or do with them anymore.

from the dark themed humor, to calling lucifer a clown, teaming up with satan and belphie to upset mr. feather fuck face. mammon and (y/n) getting in trouble. to a lot of chaos.

what in devildom was diavolo thinking.

chapter 1 | 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐮𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠

chapter 2 | 𝐲𝐨’𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞’𝐧𝐭

chapter 3 | 𝐰𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐚𝐬𝐬 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐧

[mageofseven]

hi! could you ask for matchup for brother and undateables? I am a Brazilian girl, Capricorn, Slytherin, INFJ, bi and cat person. my main hobby is reading, playing video games and sharing memes for everyone I know, but I also love to put on music and dance around (even if it’s not good). on the outside I seem very unfriendly but those who know me know that I laugh at EVERYTHING besides being irritatingly sincere to the point of making others cry, I am very independent and I like to work to have everything I want and I love being in contact with nature. in terms of physique I have 1.65 and I am very pale (not well seen in a tropical country), I have long and wonderful light brown hair extremely curly, I wear glasses and I am not very vain.

I really love your writing, thank you very much😍😍😍😍

Aww thank you! I'm glad you like posts ^^

Also, just a reminder to others, but please do not include a physical description of yourself in these requests. What you look like is not important information for these matchups. The Boys love you guys regardless of how you look after all 🥰

Anyway!

I pair you with...

Solomon

Okay, to start with, I see our wonderfully shady sorcerer as a Slytherin too, so you both have your house in common. Your insightful and creative ways (which you get from your MBTI) are traits that I really see this man being drawn to. As a Capricorn, you are organized, practical, and goal-oriented, all things that I really see Solomon respecting about you.

This combined with your shared interest in reading and possibly memes (I mean, this fandom loves to present Solomon as this fun and chaotic friend of MC's who jokes with them and enjoys everything Gen Z does so fandom wise, I'd imagine that Soli loves memes). You two would contrast each other a bit in the way that you prefer to be blunt and honest while our sorcerer is a bit more secretive and cryptic with his communication, but I can't imagine this difference putting too much of a strain on your relationship.

Overall, the two of you would be a fun loving and intelligent couple, possible a power couple, if you two play your cards right. You both have goals set and the determination to get there, as well as having each other to build you up further.

[miz-joelys-sherlollilists]

Post-TFP Sherlolly Fics K-O - Updated 06/29/20

Stories that go beyond the immediate aftermath of The Call and the events of The Final Problem. If it’s set more than a a week after the episode, then it belongs on this list. Find #-D here , E-J here, P-T here and U-Z here.

K

Keep You in Love With Me by bakerst_sherlolly (Rated K, One-Shot) AO3 2017

The Keeper (The Wedding Planner AU) by daisherz365 (Rated T, One-Shot) Drunk!lock ff.net 2017

The Kensington House (Time of the Season series) by afteriwake (Rated T, One-Shot) Married Sherlolly, Parentlock AO3 2017

The key by Oldkostka (Rated K+, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) Kidnapped! AO3 2020

The Keys To His Heart by Dreamin (Rated T, One-Shot) Fantasy/ Supernatural AO3 2018

Kindly Unspoken by simplyshelbs16 (Rated T, Complete, Multi-Chapter) ff.net 2018

Kiss and Tell by anafrea (Rated M, One-Shot) Pridelolly, PWP AO3 2017

Kitchen Sink Love Song by hobbitsdoitbetter (Rated M, One-Shot) tumblr 2017

L

The Lab Rat... by Matori_Holmes (Rated T, One-Shot) SciFi AO3 2017

Lace by Sundance201 (Rated M, One-Shot) Dom!lock, PWP AO3 2018

Laid Bare by Dreamin (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2020

The Language of Flowers by mouriana (Rated K, One-Shot) AO3 2017

The Last Meal by theSapphireSky (Rated T, One-Shot) tumblr 2018

The last person you'd think of by OhAine (Rated K, One-Shot) Proposal AO3 2017

Late Night Call by Dreamin (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2017

Lazarus by surprisingrice (Rated M, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) Casefic AO3 2017

Leave A Message by Dreamin (Rated T, One-Shot) Drunk!lock AO3 2018

Legendary by Lono (Rated T, Complete, Two-Parter) S4/TFP, Molly Leaves fic ff.net 2017

Lemon by theunsinkablemollyholmes (Rated M, One-Shot) tumblr 2019

Let It Be True by flimflam99 (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2018

Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow! by hobbitsdoitbetter (Rated T, Complete, Multi-Chapter) Trapped Together AO3 2019

Let's Give Them Something to Talk About by Mouse9 (Rated T, One-Shot)  AO3 2018

Liar! by musicprincess1990 (Rated T, One-Shot) Married Sherlolly, Parentlock tumblr 2020

Light by whitecrossgirl (Rated T, One-Shot) Songfic, Parentlock tumblr 2017

Like An Apple From A Tree (Swedenlolly) by Ukthxbye (Rated T, Complete, Multi-Chapter) Long fic, On Holiday AO3 2018

Like Coming Home by darnedchild (Rated K+, One-Shot) AO3 2018

Like the Shine of Long-Extinguished Stars by Sherlockian87 (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2018

Little Bird by Caffeine_faerie (Rated T, Complete, Multi-Chapter) AO3 2018

Lollipop by hobbitsdoitbetter (Rated M, One-Shot) PWP, Dom!lock AO3 2017

Londoners in Los Angeles by GoodShipSherlollipop (Rated M, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) Married Sherlolly, Pregnancy fic, Love American Style AO3 2018

The Losing Side by Supervillegirl (Rated K+, Complete, Two-Parter) ff.net 2017  

Lost It by write-place-write-time (Rated K, One-Shot) Godparents tumblr 2017

Love Declarations by ValeriaAnne (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2020

Love is a sentimental defect by albertismyskull (Rated K, One-Shot) AO3 2018

Love is Like by lilsherlockian1975 (Rated K, One-Shot) ff.net 2017

Love Letters by Bodhicitta (Rated M, Incomplete, Multi-Chapter) AO3 2017

The Love Pirate by GoodShipSherlollipop (Rated M, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) PTFP (Dream fic) ff.net 2018

Lovely Things by sthrngrlsrck (Rated M, One-Shot) AO3 2019

Lover by simplyshelbs16 (Rated T, One-Shot) Songfic AO3 2019

Lucky F**king Man (Lucky F**king Couple series) by ItsSweaterWeather (Rated M, One-Shot) Married Sherlolly, Pregnancy fic, Songfic AO3 2017

Lucky F**king Woman | Première Partie (Lucky F**king Couple series) by ItsSweaterWeather (Rated M, One-Shot) Dom!lock, PWP, Married Sherlolly, Pregnancy Fic AO3 2017

M

Mad Honey by GarudaDreamsOfRain (Rated T, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) AO3 2018

Making Sense of It All by Mikarin Aoi (Rated M, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) ff.net 2020

Map of the World by hobbitsdoitbetter (Rated T, One-Shot) Pregnancy fic, Parent!lock AO3 2017

Matchmaker, Matchmaker by ll_again (Rated M, In Progress, Two-Parter) Matchmaking AO3 2017

Maybe Baby? by rowhibbler (Rated M, Incomplete, Multi-Chapter) AO3 2017

Meet Me in the Pouring Rain by simplyshelbs16 (Rated T, One-Shot) ff.net 2019

Melody by sherlollian2016m (Rated T, One-Shot) tumblr 2017

Mememto Mori (Aftermath series) by geekmama (Rated K, One-Shot) SAW 18, Parentlock, Retirement!lock, Birthday, Married Sherlolly, Soup to Nuts AO3 2018  

Memory by thisisartbylexie (Rated K, One-Shot) tumblr 2019

Memory Lane by katiebuttercup (Rated K, One-Shot) Amnesia fic AO3 2018

Mere Mortals by hobbitsdoitbetter (Rated K+, One-Shot) tumblr 2018

Merry Christmas Molly Hooper by MrsMCrieff (Rated M, Complete, Multi-Chapter) Christmas ff.net 2018

Miracle on Southbank by Ukthxbye (Rated K+, One-Shot) Christmas AO3 2018

Missed connections-Sherlolly Halloween by katerbees (Rated T, One-Shot) Halloween AO3 2017

Missed Connotations by Ukthxbye (Rated T, One-Shot) SAW 19 AO3 2019

Mistletoe & Mayhem by hobbitsdoitbetter (Rated T, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) Christmas, Matchmaking AO3 2018

Mistletoe Kiss by musicprincess1990 (Rated T, One-Shot) Christmas AO3 2019

Misunderstandings by simplyshelbs16 (Rated T, One-Shot) Jealouslock ff.net 2017

Molly and the Mysterious Case of a Spontaneous Sherlock (Random Snippets series) by kittymsmith (Rated K+, One-Shot) Toby!fic AO3 2019

The Molly Diaries II by Penelope1730 (Rated M, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) Kidnap fic AO3 2017 SAMFAs 2017 M-3 Best Adventure 3rd Place, Best Mystery 2nd Place

Molly’s Hats by love-yellow-doors (Rated K, One-Shot) tumblr 2020

Molly Hooper: Distraction Extraordinaire by 221B_akerSt (Rated T, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) AO3 2017

The Molly Hooper Project by darnedchild (Rated K, One-Shot) Godparents, Birthday fic AO3 2018

"Molly, please, without asking why, just say these words" by writingwife83 (Rated K+, One-Shot) tumblr 2020

Molly the Brat (A Roleplay A Day series) by Canadianfan21 (Rated M, Complete, Two-Parter) PWP, Dom!lock AO3 2017

Molly's Chair (Random Snippets series) by kittymsmith (Rated K, One-Shot) AO3 2018

Molly's Day Off by summer_of_1985 (Rated K, One-Shot) Married Sherlolly AO3 2019

Molly's Family by afteriwake (Rated K+, One-Shot) Single Parent AO3 2018 

Molly's Surprise Friend by afteriwake (Rated T, One-Shot) Wed!lock AO3 2017

Molly's Type by ll_again (Rated T, One-Shot) Drunk!lock tumblr 2017

Molyamory by lilsherlockian1975 (Rated M, One-Shot) ff.net 2018

Monsters! by hobbitsdoitbetter (Rated K+, One-Shot) Outside Looking In AO3 2017

Moonlight by hobbitsdoitbetter (Rated M, One-Shot) PWP AO3 2017

The Moors of Roane Hall by KaitlynRose (Rated T, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) casefic ff.net 2017

More Holmes’ in the house by platinumnib (Rated K, One-Shot) Pregnancy fic AO3 2017

More Precious than Gold (The Hobbit AU) by alphashley14 (Rated T, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) Dragon!lock, Adapt/Crossover AO3 2018

The Morning After by Meowmixmeow (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2018

The Most Undateable Girl in London by theSapphireSky (Rated K+, One-Shot) tumblr 2018

Mothering Day (Aftermath series) by geekmama (Rated T, One-Shot) Married Sherlolly, Pregnancy fic, Parentlock, Other Holiday AO3 2019 

my cup runneth over (The Dinner series) by whowhatsitwhich (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2018

My Mollies by ValeriaAnne (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2017

The Mycroft and Mary Connection Exposed by GoodShipSherlollipop (Rated T, Complete, Multi-Chapter) Married Sherlolly ff.net 2020

Mycroft's Gift by Emma_Lynch (Rated T, Complete, Multi-Chapter) AO3 2019

N

Naked Ambitions by mizjoely (Rated T, One-Shot) The Arts, Flatmates AO3 2019

Namesake by PrairieLily (Rated T, Complete, Multi-Chapter) Pregnancy fic ff.net 2017

Needs Must (Time of the Season series) by geekmama (Rated T, One-Shot) HABD Molly AO3 2017

Never Dull by mizjoely (Rated K, One-Shot) Parent!lock AO3 2017

The New Adventure of Sherlock Holmes (Home Sweet Holmes series) by Amalia Kensington (Rated T, One-Shot) Married Sherlolly, Parentlock AO3 2018

New Day by Alireza (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2018

New Horizons by Rhiannon_A_Christy (Rated T, One-Shot) Birthday AO3 2017

New Year's Day by simplyshelbs16 (Rated T, One-Shot) New Years, Songfic ff.net 2017

The Newlyweds by GlowingMechanicalHeart (Rated K, One-Shot) Wed!lock AO3 2018

Night & Day by lilsherlockian1975 (Rated M, Complete, Multi-Chapter)  ff.net 2018

Night Museum (Sequel to Chocolate Factory) by mizjoely (Rated K, One-Shot) Proposal AO3 2019

No Explanations Needed by Reia (Rated K+, One-Shot) AO3 2017

No Light, No Light... (Another Nail In The Coffin) by Lothiriel84 (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2017

No Small Matters by WickedScribbles (Rated M, Incomplete, Multi-Chapter) AO3 2017

No Reason (Random Snippets series) by kittymsmith (Rated K+, One-Shot) AO3 2018

Not All Lies Are Bad by afteriwake (Rated K+, One-Shot) Pregnancy Fic, Parentlock AO3 2018

Not Much of a Target by Writingwife83 (Rated T, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) Matchmaking AO3 2019

Nothing's Changed That Matters by afteriwake (Rated T, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) Molly Leaves fic AO3 2017 

November Rain by mizjoely (Rated T, One-Shot) songfic ff.net 2017

Now what were motionless move by forthegenuine (Rated T, One-Shot) Godparents, Birthday AO3 2017

Nude by WillSherJohnKhan (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2019

Nurturing Life by mizjoely (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2018

O

Of Assumptions and Snogging by SimplyShelbs16 (Rated T, Complete, Multi-Chapter) AO3 2017

Of Hockey Games and Matchmaking by Broadwaylover17 (Rated K, One-Shot) Matchmaking AO3 2020

Of Kisses and Scones by theSapphireSky (Rated K, One-Shot) AO3 2017

Of Sewers & Chinese Food by MajesticMoments (Rated K, One-Shot) Secret Relationship AO3 2017

Oh By Gosh By Golly by mizjoely (Rated K, One-Shot) Christmas AO3 2020

Oh So Quiet by MrsMCrieff (Rated M, Complete, Multi-Chapter) ff.net 2018

On My Own by Bella_Cuore (Rated K+, In Progress, Multi-Chapter) Matchmaking AO3 2017

The One by ladysolitaire83 (Rated K, One-Shot) ff.net 2018

One Night Stand by MrsMCrieff (Rated M, Complete, Multi-Chapter) Pregnancy fic ff.net 2017

One Perfect Christmas by mizjoely (Rated K, One-Shot) Christmas ff.net 2018

The One Where John Watson Actually Figures Things Out First by mychakk (Rated K+, One-Shot) Married Sherlolly, Pregnancy fic AO3 2019

The One Woman Who Matters by supervillegirl (Rated K+, One-Shot) ff.net 2017  

one word against a thousand actions by afteriwake (Rated K, One-Shot) AO3 2017

One Year On by rainbow-letters (Rated T, One-Shot) HABD (Sherlock) tumblr 2018

The Ones We Love by lilsherlockian1975 (Rated T, Complete, Multi-Chapter) ff.net 2017

Only Us by GoodShipSherlollipop (Rated T, One-Shot) Songfic AO3 2018

only with the heart by TolkeinGirl (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2017

Orange (Swedenlolly) by vertual (Rated T, One-Shot) AO3 2018

Out in the Cold by beingonstageismagic (Rated K, One-Shot) AO3 2019

Out of Mind, Out of Sight by Supervillegirl (Rated T, Multi-Chapter, Complete) ff.net 2018

[spxdeychelles]

I like you

Prompted by that video from Z’s app when she said she had the courage to ask the person she likes whether they’re doing this or not (I wrote this MONTHS AGO so)

-x-

"I can't believe you invited me to this lame party." Michelle mocks as she and Peter walk into the new Avengers HQ, the atmosphere already buzzing with the light conversation of New York's finest and richest and the clinking of champagne glasses.

"Are you kidding me?" Peter looks up at her because Michelle's mom had 'threatened' her into wearing heels tonight and the 2 inches she already had on him suddenly becomes 6 and he's feeling a little more like her little brother rather than a boy who is supposedly 3 months and 12 days older than her. Michelle's gaze falls upon the young brown haired boy and she breaks out into a small grin.

"Nah, I'm messing with you. This is pretty cool. Thanks for inviting me." She nudges his shoulder with hers playfully, almost catching him across the jaw because of her height.

"Thanks for agreeing to being my date last minute." Michelle cocks her head to the side and smiles knowingly at him.

"Date?" She teases. A bright pink shadow morphs across Peter's cheeks and he grimaces nervously.

"I didn't mean date, as in like date date but date like-" Michelle throws her head back and laughs and it's the most genuine and angelic thing Peter's ever heard and he swears his heart stops beating for a few seconds.

"You're so easy to mess with Parker."

"Right. Because you'd never go on a date. Michelle Jones on a date? Never." Michelle stops laughing and deadpans (jokingly).

"Are you trying to say I'm undateable?"

"What?? No! I mean of course anyone would be lucky to date you! You're so smart and beautiful and I just meant that you umm-would...would you like to meet Mr. Stark?" He asks suddenly, trying to change the conversation because he really is shooting himself in the foot and being an absolute dork in front of the girl he's been obsessively crushing on for 2 years and the way Michelle is looking at him is making him feel some type of way and he's almost forgotten how to use his lungs because here and now, underneath the warm glowing light of the glass chandelier above them, Michelle looks breathtaking in a long pink flowing gown and there's a side split which her leg slips out of from time to time and Peter's hormonal teenage brain goes fuzzy and he can't remember how to form a sentence.

"I'd love to." Michelle loops her arm through his and he wishes his body didn't have to react to every little thing she does. They walk around the large hall, weaving through the throng of people until Peter spots Mr. Stark and Pepper conversing with another middle aged couple. Pepper looks up and catches Peter's eye, smiling widely and waving them over. Once the young duo reach them, Pepper breaks away from her husband and engulfs Peter in a motherly hug. She pulls back and kisses him on the both cheeks, her hands resting on his broad shoulders (which came as a big surprise to Michelle the day she accidentally walked in on him half naked changing out of the Spider-Man suit).

"It's nice to see you Peter." Her hand moves from Peter's shoulder to reach out for Michelle's. "And you must be-"

"Michelle." Peter introduces as Pepper shakes the caramel skinned girl's hand. "Michelle is my ummm...friend."

"Ahhh Michelle." Tony interrupts out of no where, falling by Pepper's side, his right arm snaking around her waist. "I've heard a lot about you."

"You have?" Michelle looks down at Peter and the small boy wishes the ground beneath him would open up and swallow him whole because tonight couldn't get any more embarrassing. Tony looks at Peter and smiles, deciding to have mercy on the poor boy and not expose him. Although if from what Peter has told him about Michelle, if she's as smart as he'd mentioned countless times before among other things, then she's probably already figured out the spiderboy is deeply in love with her.

"I've heard you have quite an amazing brain."

"Peter was probably exaggerating, it's not that amazing."

"We're always looking for fresh young minds here at Stark Industries. Maybe we could sit down and see what we can do for you. Are you interested?" Michelle's jaw drops. She isn't as obsessed with the man in front of her like her companion is but she's still pretty overwhelmed with the fact that Tony Stark himself has just pretty much offered her a job on the spot.

"Uhhh, yeah! Yeah, totally! I'd love to." Tony nods as though he already knew girl wouldn't say no.

"I'll be in touch. I'm sure Peter can give me your details."

"Yeah, yeah, of course. Thank you Mr. Stark." Michelle replies, still a little shell shocked.

"No problem. Now enjoy your night, the bar is open." He winks.

"They're underage Tony!" Pepper scolds but she too is smiling.

"Please, we were doing worse at their age." He laughs as Pepper pulls him away to talk to some more people. Once they're out of sight, Michelle turns to Peter, still in awe.

"Did Tony Stark just offer me a job?" Peter smiles because he remembers feeling a similar way the first time he met Tony.

"I think so." Michelle suddenly breaks out into a wide grin and presses her body flush against his, pulling him into a tight hug. Her arms wrap his shoulders and her hair smells like coconut and Peter feels lightheaded.

"Thank you." She whispers as he hold her.

"Why are you thanking me?" She pulls away and pushes her hair behind her ear.

"Well you introduced me to him." She shrugs.

"Then I guess you owe me one." He smiles. She rolls her eyes and walks away from him towards the bar.

"Don't let it get to your head Parker." Peter follows closely behind her.

"Where are you going?" He asks.

"To get a drink. Want one?" He rushes up to her and falls in step next to her.

"But we’re underage." He hisses. "They're not gonna serve you."

"I've been buying alcohol for my mother since I was 15. I know how to get served." Peter looks up at her and Michelle rolls her eyes again.

"Don't at me like that Peter, I don't need your pity. She's fine now, she doesn't drink as much anymore."

"I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"You weren't supposed to. Anyway, enough about my mom, watch and learn little boy. And stay back, your baby face might cramp my style." Peter watched as she sashayed up to the bar and fell into conversation with the bar tender easily. Before he knew what happening, she was returning with two glasses of bubbling light pink liquid. She hands him one of them and clinks her glass against his before draining hers. Peter watches her in awe and she empties the contents of the glass.

"I think you should slow down Michelle."

"I know my limit Parker, don't worry. I'm nothing like my mom was." Peter nods and sips at his drink.

Peter eventually gave into peer pressure and 3 glasses of champagne later, both him and Michelle are giggling like idiots as they stumble slightly across the corridor. They've long since left the main hall and are exploring the rest of the HQ. They aren't drunk, only slightly tipsy but tipsy and 4 inch heels aren't exactly what you call a match made in heaven and Michelle finds herself tripping and landing in Peter's arms. Peter, caught off guard, his usually quick reflexes clouded by the alcohol coursing though his veins is unable to hold Michelle so they both go crashing onto the ground with a thud, Michelle draped on top off him.

"Sorry," she giggles. Peter laughs too but then her dark brown eyes meet his hazel ones and he's forgetting how to breathe again because Michelle's face is so close to his he can smell the cherry on her lip gloss and her leg is between his thighs and she bites her lip and Peter just stares at her because he wants to kiss her, oh my god he really wants to kiss her but his mind is telling him to get up because ew, why would MJ want to kiss a dork like you but before he knows what's happening, her lips are on his and his hands are lost in her hair. He doesn't know who made the first move and he doesn't stop to ask because MJ is doing this thing with her hand on his scalp and he really does think he's going to explode. Just as sudden as the kiss was, it's over and MJ is back on her feet. Peter gets up and takes a step back.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't-"

"Oh shut up Peter." Michelle takes his hand and opens the nearest random door, pushing him inside and closing it behind her. Then her arms are back around his neck and she crashes her lips to his again and it's almost as though they never stopped kissing. Peter grips her hip and pulls her closer, so she's flush against his frame and there's barely any space between them. Peter groans when Michelle slips her tongue into his mouth and presses her further into the wall. His hand moves to the back of her head and he angles his to deepen the kiss even more. It's a clash of tongue and teeth as Peter shrugs off his suit jacket and Michelle slips her hand under his white shirt to run her nails across his back. They both blame the alcohol for their actions but they know it’s anything but and when they finally pull away, neither says anything until Michelle breaks the silence.

"Listen, I like you Peter."

"I, uhhh, I like you too Michelle. A lot."

"I've been waiting for you to make a move but it seems I'm going to have to do it myself. So are we doing this or not?"

"I, uhhh, yeah. Yeah, I want to. I want to do this. I really want to do this."

"Good." Michelle replies before pressing her lips to his once more and the two forget that May was supposed to have picked them up 20 minutes ago.

[eposettemyass]

tagged by: @enjolrastuck thank you!! ❣️

rules: answer the questions in a new post and tag 10 blogs you would like to get to know better.

I tag: @cryingcaffeine @enjolra-s @probably-pride-related @grangratree i don’t know a lot of people im sorry

a - Age: 69 16 yikes

b - birthplace: Belleville, Illinois

c - current time: 9:34 pm

d - drink you last had: coffee with cream!

e - easiest person people to talk to: my mom or my two best friends

f - favourite song: it changes ever week but the two constants are From Eden by Hozier and Dodie’s cover of La Vie en Rose

g - grossest memory: (yeah warning this is disgusting) ever since i was 4, i had a cyst on my cheek that i thought was solid. so when i was 12 (2 days before my shows opening night no less) i noticed i had a zit on top of the spot so i went to pop it and then the whole cyst just. fucking exploded. all over the mirror. it looked like white cheese and smelled like spoiled milk. so yeah sorry for that

h - horror yes or horror no: Y E S

i - in love?: with the concept but i am Undateable

j - jealous of people?: sometimes, but only briefly then i try not to be

l - love at first sight or should I walk by again: first sight i’m such a hopeless romantic

m - middle name: Kylin (that’s where kyle comes from!)

n - number of siblings: 2

o - one wish: for regimes to dissolve, for people to be free, for happiness not hunger

p - person you called last: my best friend

q - question you are always asked: “why is your nickname kyle”

r - reason to smile: i have good friends and my parents love me, also my cat finally loves me

s - song you sang last: that 70s show themesong haha

t - time you woke up: 9:10 am

u - underwear colour: tan

v - vacation destination: most recent vacations were US and Australia, but i’d love to go to France

w - worst habit: procrastinating!!! I’m doing it right now!!!

x - rays: none

y - your favourite food: any form of pasta

z - zodiac sign: Leo :^)

[sol1loqu1st]

xyz for Mauve and lmn for Lore?

thanks!!mauve:X: Xylophone
1. what is their favorite genre of music?hmm she probably likes punk tbh
2. do they have a favorite song?in canon, no, bc its set in The Future n i didnt want to have to guess what Future Punk sounds like (hey can we. can we make futurepunk), but lbr, even in a modern au she probably ?? likes smth to obscure for me to have heard
3. do they have a favorite band/artist/singer?kind of the same deal as above
4. can they sing well?(i mean really that depends on who ends up voicing her BUT) my headcanon is probably no?? like i think she can probably carry a tune semi-well but thats as far as her musical talent goes
5. can they rap?(again, depends on who voices her but) probably not unless its really slow rapping and even then she probably cant keep time fjdhdhdY: You
1. how old were you when you created them?uhhhhhh shit when did stranger things come out bc it was a little before that, like mid-2016? ive found (unfortunately undated) early concepts for her character that, based on art style and certain ideas, probably date back to like early ? 2016?
2. what inspired you to create them?i have NO IDEA again i remember stranger things coming out pretty soon after i really had some solid ideas and being a little disappointed that she was so similar to eleven, but like in general ????? her earliest concepts were actually a sort of hybrid between nylus' current concept and verne's and i /think/ she was designed as a sort of. ???? parallel to verne somehow ?? that was kept a little bit but not nearly as much
3. were they different when they were first created?VERY. i dont wanna go into details bc Spoilers but she was A LOT different
4. do you enjoy writing them more than other characters?i mean depends, shes prob. one of my coolest character concepts but is one of those characters that unfortunately gets backseated a little too often in audio drama format (she's by far the least talkative out of her Main Trio and isnt always involved in the same action as nylus and auric, so) ??? i think she'd be one of my favs to write in the hypothetical television show and/or novel
5. what’s your favorite thing about them?MMMMMM cant decide ,, i love the Number Of Layers to her character that will Probably Never Get Explored except in prose but yknowZ: Zebra
1. what’s their favorite animal?i think???? probably birds. theres a Reason for this but i cant say what it is bc its a very minor spoiler
2. do they like animals?i think yes probably ? not as pets but she likes them in nature
3. cats or dogs?im tempted to say cats bc she just Seems Like A Cat Person but no, mauve definitely prefers dogs
4. what’s their dream pet?i dont think she would get a pet tbh ?? like this seems like a cop-out but genuinely she probably would not own a pet
5. do they have any pets at the moment?nopelore:L: Lemons
1. what is their favorite fruit?fuckin. like grapefruit or some shit
2. what is their least favorite fruit?The Bad Kind uhhhhh probably something other people like, such as Strawberries
3. are there any foods they hate?not really but he doesnt particularly like sweet foods
4. do they have any food intolerances?not that ive thought of, probably not
5. what is their favorite food?i genuinely dont think lore cares about food tho like hed eat A Big Bowl Of Plain Rice and think it tastes the same as something totally different and much more seasonedM: Maternal
1. would they want a daughter or a son?excuse you he'd want a little nb....,, no im jk he probably wouldnt Care abt the Gender of his Child
2. how many children do they want?like 1 or 2, if that, and only if his partner wanted them fjdhfhd
3. would they be a good parent?he'd ??? do his best but probably ultimately fail as a parent, he has no idea how to Child
4. what would they name a son? what would they name a daughter?I MEAN i dont think it works that way in this world i think the names kind of choose the child since i Guess everyones fuckin named after animals theyre connected to or time of birth or personality traits or whatever ,, also most names are gender neutral in the book hes from so. fjdhdhs
5. would they adopt?i think thats probably the only way he'd do it tbhN: Never Have I Ever
1. what would they never do?i mean thats honestly a tough question bc He Did Some Things in draft 1 that im not sure were in character but i havent actually brought him into the plot yet in draft 2??? anyway hed prob. never intentionally harm his friends or ppl he cares about
2. what have they never done that they want to do?i mean. ??? reconcile w his sister is A Big One a smaller one would probably be like. idk This Boy Cannot Stay Still so he probably wants to travel a whole lot
3. is there anything they absolutely can’t believe people do?settle down???????? get married have 2.5 kids and never do anything fun ever again???????? also, politics
4. what is the most embarrassing thing they’ve done?fuckin. running away from home to become a thief Just Because He Was Bored is probably a good contender despite that being basically his whole concept
5. have they done anything they thought they’d never do?HMMMMMMM THATS A SPOILER ISNT IT

[madpicks]

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Netflix Originals Release Dates: A Calendar of All Original TV Shows and Movies

Netflix is producing a ton of original content these days and I’ve been finding it harder and harder to keep track of it all. Netflix will release 1,000 hours of original shows and movies in 2017, spending $6 billion to do so. That’s almost double the amount of original programming they released 2016, which included an estimated 126 TV shows. You would have to spend 41 days binge-watching Netflix to see all of their expected 2017 original programming.

The following is a completely updated list of Netflix Originals release dates for all of the Netflix Original TV Shows and Netflix Original Movies. We have also included a list of the upcoming productions that don’t have a scheduled release date yet..

  Netflix Originals Release Dates

Please Note: What follows is a listing of all the upcoming TV shows and movies that Netflix considers a Netflix original. The definition of a Netflix original can be rather vague. A television series like House of Cards is considered a Netflix Original, even though Media Rights Capital produced the series and sold the streaming rights to Netflix. Other shows like The OA and Stranger Things were produced in-house for the streaming service. Netflix acquires many features and documentaries at film festivals, like the recent 2017 Sundance Film Festival. While they were not produced directly by Netflix, the streaming company now owns the films outright.

There are so many original series and movies planned by Netflix that we have to break this up into multiple pages. Right now, we have collected nearly 150 announced productions listed here. If they have a proper release date, they are organized chronologically. Otherwise, undated movies and TV shows are listed alphabetically by year. Here is an index to get to what you’re looking for:

March 2017 Netflix Originals releases

April – December 2017 Netflix Originals releases

2017 To Be Dated: A-E, F-L, L-Z

2018-2019 Netflix Originals releases

Let’s begin with the March 2017 Netflix Originals releases.

February 28: Thank God For Jokes [Comedy Special]

Sleepwalk with Me and Don’t Think Twice writer and director Mike Birbiglia has an all-new stand-up special called Thank God for Jokes and the trailer for the special can be watched here. Here’s the official synopsis: “Mike Birbiglia declares that a joke should never end with ‘I’m joking.’ In his all-new stand-up comedy special, Birbiglia tiptoes hilariously through the minefield that is modern-day joke-telling. Join Mike as he learns that the same jokes that elicit laughter have the power to produce tears, rage, and a whole lot of getting yelled at. Ultimately it’s a show that asks, “How far should we go for the laugh?””

March 3: Greenleaf Season 1

“Although members of the Greenleaf family run a Memphis megachurch, their business and personal lives are tainted with greed, adultery and other sins.”

The 13-episode first season comes from creator Craig Wright.

March 7: Amy Schumer: The Leather Special [Comedy Special]

“Emmy® and Peabody Award-winning comedian Amy Schumer targets binge drinking, her relationship with her boyfriend and navigating the unknown terrain of being a newly famous woman who looks like someone you grew up with. Schumer also directed The Leather Special, which was filmed at Denver’s Bellco Theater.”

March 10: Love Season 2

“It’s awkward. It’s impossible. It’s infuriating. And it may just be the best thing that’s ever happened to them.”  Created by Judd Apatow, Lesley Arfin, and Paul Rust, and starring Gillian Jacobs, Rust, and Claudia O’Doherty, this 12-episode second season will continue the story of Mickey Dobbs (Jacobs) and Gus Cruikshank (Rust). Watch the Love season 2 trailer here. A third season has also been announced.

March 10: Buddy Thunderstruck Season 1

Buddy Thunderstruck, is a stop-motion action-comedy series about a dog who races semi trucks. “From American Greetings Entertainment with Stoopid Buddy Stoodios, Buddy Thunderstruck is an action–comedy, stop–motion extravaganza that follows the adventures of a semi–truck racing dog named Buddy and his albino ferret mechanic. It all goes down in race–obsessed Greasepit, a place chock full of larger–than–life characters and nitro–burning, gear–slamming, tire–squealing, fish–tailing good times.” Watch the Buddy Thunderstruck trailer here.

March 10: Burning Sands [Movie]

“Burning Sands takes you on a raw, voyeuristic journey of fraternity pledging through the eyes of one favored pledgee, who is torn between honoring a code of silence or standing up against the intensifying violence of underground hazing. Led by a breakthrough performance by Trevor Jackson, director Gerard McMurray’s feature directorial debut brings an emotional honesty to the classic tale of “rites of passage” and the complicated bonds of brotherhood.”

The film was selected for the 2017 Sundance Film Festival US Dramatic Competition. Burning Sands stars Trevor Jackson (ABC’s American Crime) in a breakout performance, along with Alfre Woodard, Steve Harris, Trevante Rhodes, Tosin Cole, DeRon Horton, Imani Hakim and Serayah. It is directed and co-written by Gerard McMurray (producer, Fruitvale Station). The film was produced by Stephanie Allain (Beyond the Lights), Jason Michael Berman (The Birth of a Nation), Reginald Hudlin (Django Unchained) and Mel Jones (Dear White People). Common also executive produced and contributed an original song, “The Cross.” Watch the Burning Sands trailer here.

March 10: One Day At A Time: Season 1 (Alternate Title: One More Time)

“A reimagining of the Norman Lear classic, centering on a Cuban-American family. Our heroine is a recently separated, former military mom (Justina Machado) navigating a new single life while raising her radical teenaged daughter and socially adept tween son, with the “help” of her old school Cuban-born mom (Rita Moreno) and a friends- without-benefits building manager named Schneider. The 13-episode first season of One Day at a Time is produced by Act III Productions, Inc., Snowpants Productions and Small Fish Studios in association with Sony Pictures Television. Norman Lear, Mike Royce, Gloria Calderón Kellett and Michael Garcia are executive producers.” 13 episodes of the multi-cam comedy will be released.

March 14: Jim Norton: Mouthful of Shame [Comedy Special]

“American stand up comedian, radio personality, bestselling author and actor, Jim Norton is the morning co-host of The Jim Norton & Sam Roberts Show on SiriusXM Satellite Radio. For 14 years, Norton was 3rd mic on the Opie and Anthony Show. Earlier this year, he was announced as co-host of UFC Unfiltered Podcast with Jim Norton & Matt Serra, which has routinely been on the top charts on iTunes. As an author, his two books, Happy Endings: The Tales of a Meaty-Breasted Zilch and I Hate Your Guts were New York Times bestsellers and since 2014 he has contributed eight articles to Time.com. He has 4 one-hour comedy specials that can be seen on Hulu and HBO GO and can currently be seen in a recurring role on the critically acclaimed Starz series, Power. He has had regularly guest-starred on The Tonight Show, The Late Show with David Letterman, Tough Crowd With Colin Quinn, @Midnight, Kennedy, The Jim Gaffigan Show, Inside Amy Schumer and Louie.”

March 16: Beau Sejour: Season 1

Beau Sejour is 9-episode Dutch drama series. “A girl wakes up in a hotel room and she finds her own dead body in the bathtub. She tries to solve her own murder but realizes that nobody except 5 people can see her.” Watch the Beau Sejour trailer here.

March 17: Marvel’s Iron Fist Season 1

“Billionaire Danny Rand (Finn Jones) returns to New York City after being missing for years, trying to reconnect with his past and his family legacy. He fights against the criminal element corrupting New York City with his kung-fu mastery and ability to summon the awesome power of the fiery Iron Fist.”

The fourth series in Netflix’s Marvel line of shows leading up to The Defenders crossover series. Finn Jones stars as Danny Rand/Iron Fist, a martial arts expert with the ability to call upon the power of the Iron Fist. Jessica Henwick, David Wenham, Jessica Stroup, Tom Pelphrey, and Rosario Dawson also star.  Developed by Scott Buck, who has written episodes of Six Feet Under, Rome, Dexter, Everybody Loves Raymond, Coach and The Oblongs. Watch the Iron Fist trailer here.

March 17: Samurai Gourmet Season 1

“The live action series ‘Samurai Gourmet,’ based on Masayuki Kusumi’s essay and the manga of the same title, featuring the life of Takeshi Kasumi. Takeshi Kasumi has spent his entire life devoted to his job. Now a retired man, he finds himself with plenty of extra time on his hands. While on an afternoon walk, Kasumi discovers the joys of day time drinking and the realization that he is now free to eat and drink what he wants, when he wants. This awakens his inner persona – a wandering samurai living life freely in Japan’s age of civil wars. Thus begins his search for blissfully delectable delights to satisfy his stomach and the samurai’s soul. A retired man’s tales of adventure in twelve episodes, including “Lunch Time Beer at a Diner,” “The Devilish Madame,” “A Croquette for the Heart” and “Wanderer’s Italian Lunch.” 12 Episodes will premiere.

March 17: Deidra & Laney Rob a Train

“Life is moving fast for whip-smart high school senior Deidra (Ashleigh Murray) and her younger sister Laney (Rachel Crow).  Graduation looms, their part-time dad is a full-time schemer, and adolescent embarrassments arrive daily — just like the train that rambles noisily through their backyard. But things take a turn for the worse when their mother Marigold (Danielle Nicolet) is thrown in jail for a minor offense after succumbing to the pressure of single parenting. To help her struggling family, Deidra hatches a plan to start robbing trains.  Things go off without a hitch, until a railroad detective (Tim Blake Nelson) starts sniffing around.”

The film premiered at the 2017 Sundance Film Festival. Directed by Sydney Freeland and written by Shelby Farrell, the Netflix original film Deidra & Laney Rob a Train stars Ashleigh Murray, Rachel Crow, Tim Blake Nelson, Danielle Nicolet, Sasheer Zamata, David Sullivan, Missi Pyle, Arturo Castro, Brooke Markham and Sharon Lawrence.  Susan Cartsonis and Nick Moceri serve as producers.  Randy Kiyan, Ian Bricke, and Funa Maduka serve as executive producers. Watch the Deidra & Laney Rob a Train trailer here.

March 17: Julie’s Greenroom: Season 1 [Kid’s Show]

“Julie’s Green Room is an all-new arts educational show for the very young starring the legendary Julie Andrews and brought to life by the ingenious minds at Jim Henson Studios. Seven young friends learn all about the arts (dance, singing, performing, painting, and more) from Julie herself and unique guest stars (Idina Menzel, Alec Baldwin, David Hyde Pierce) in each episode.”

March 17: Pandora [Movie]

Pandora is “the highly-anticipated nuclear disaster blockbuster from CAC Entertainment by award-winning screenwriter turned director Park Jung-Woo known for the science fiction horror film, Deranged. Pandora will be available to stream exclusively on Netflix to its members in 190 countries, excluding South Korea.”

“In Pandora, disaster strikes a nuclear power plant in a small, quiet town when an earthquake unexpectedly hits. The Pirates star Kim Nam-gil plays Jae-hyuk, a man who risks his life to save his family and country from the impending atomic explosion. The film also stars Kim Young-ae (The Attorney), Jung Jin-young (Miracle of Cell No. 7) and Kim Dae-myeong (Misaeng).”

March 24: Ingobernable Season 1

“Emilia Urquiza (Kate del Castillo), is the first lady of Mexico with big plans to improve conditions for the country through her commitment in fighting for peace. She is a woman with a strong personality, conviction and clear ideas that make her capable of doing anything. As Emilia starts to lose faith in her husband, Diego Nava (Erik Hayser), she finds herself at a crossroad where she will need to find a way to deal with a great challenge and uncover the truth.” 15 episodes will arrive in season one.

March 24: Bottersnikes & Gumbles Season 2 [Kid’s Show]

“Bottersnikes & Gumbles is a fast-paced community comedy series that follows the adventures of three young Gumbles -Tink, Bounce and Willi – as they bounce about and play while avoiding getting tin-canned by their lazy and grumpy neighbors, the Bottersnikes. Developed and adapted from the much loved Bottersnikes & Gumbles books, this new CGI-animated series is created by Cheeky Little, Mighty Nice and CAKE and co-commissioned by Netflix, BBC and Channel 7 Australia.”

March 24: Grace and Frankie Season 3

Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin‘s Grace and Frankie returns for a third season. You’ll recall that season 2 ended with the friends deciding to start a vibrator business together.

March 24: The Most Hated Woman in America [Movie]

“This drama follows the controversial life of outspoken atheist Madalyn Murray O’Hair, from her landmark court battles to her infamous abduction.”

The 91-minute dramatic film is directed by Tommy O’Haver and starring Juno Temple, Adam Scott, Josh Lucas, and Melissa Leo, among others.

March 28: Jo Koy: Live From Seattle [Comedy Special]

A stand-up comedy special from comedian Jo Koy.

March 31: The Discovery [Movie]

The Discovery premiered at the 2017 Sundance Film Festival. The film has a great hook: what if scientists discovered that the afterlife is real, leading millions of people to commit suicide to get there faster? What would the world look like? This new preview offers a few hints. The Discovery is the latest film from director Charlie McDowell, who scored big with another small scale, high-concept science fiction film, The One I Love, back in 2014. This one stars the great Robert Redford as the scientist who discovers a “new plane of existence” beyond our world, essentially throwing the entire population of Earth into an existential crisis. Jason Segel plays Redford’s son and Rooney Mara plays the woman he meets after returning to his hometown for some serious self-reflection. Watch The Discovery trailer here.

March 31: 13 Reasons Why Season 1

“Based on the best-selling books by Jay Asher, 13 Reasons Why follows teenager Clay Jensen as he returns home from school to find a mysterious box with his name on it lying on his porch. Inside he discovers cassette tapes recorded by Hannah Baker—his classmate and crush—who tragically committed suicide two weeks earlier. On tape, Hannah explains that there are thirteen reasons why she decided to end her life. Will Clay be one of them? If he listens, he’ll find out how he made the list. Through Hannah and Clay’s dual narratives, 13 Reasons Why weaves an intricate and heart-wrenching story of teenage life that will deeply affect viewers.”

13 Reasons Why stars Dylan Minnette as Clay Jensen, Katherine Langford as Hannah Baker, Kate Walsh as Mrs. Baker, Brian D’Arcy James as Mr. Baker, Derek Luke as Mr. Porter, Brandon Flynn as Justin Foley, Justin Prentice as Bryce Walker, Alisha Boe as Jessica Davis, Christian Navarro as Tony Padilla, Miles Heizer as Alex Standall, and Tommy Dorfman as Ryan Shaver.

March 31: Bordertown: Season 1

“Peculiar detective Kari Sorjonen escapes the hustle and bustle of big city to a small border town.” 11-episodes of this Finland-imported crime drama mystery series from creator Miikko Oikkonen will premiere.

March 31: Dinotrux Season 4 [Kid’s Show]

“Welcome to a world of giant creatures that are half dinosaur, half construction vehicle and all awesome in Dinotrux, the Netflix original series from DreamWorks! Meet Ty Rux, a massive Tyrannosaurus Trux, and his best friend Revvit, a razor-sharp Reptool. Together, the Dinotrux and Reptools join forces for the first time ever to build a bigger, better world and battle back against the biggest and baddest of them all: D-Structs, who threatens to wreck everything they’ve built.”

March 31: Trailer Park Boys: Season 11

“This wickedly funny mockumentary series follows the booze-fueled misadventures of Julian (John Paul Tremblay), Ricky (Robb Wells) and Bubbles (Mike Smith), longtime pals and petty serial criminals who run scams from their Nova Scotia trailer park — when they aren’t in jail, that is. But kudos to the lads for their persistence, even if their harebrained get-rich schemes involve growing pot right under the nose of ex-cop Jim (John Dunsworth).”

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