#your diagnoses?
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and even now I'm sure you're still stalking me from an alt. because you just can't fucking let it go
#🫀.vents#seriously what did i fucking do?#i left? you left first#why do you need me so bad if you claim to not need me at all?#why did it matter that I had Ben and made other friends if you were so fine without me like you said?#why did it matter?#it didn't#you just sit and wait for vulnerable people#and then shower them in praise and attention and catch them in your fucking web#throw a fit when they struggle and escape#how are you any different than the people you promised me you'd never act like?#how are you better?#what makes it okay for you?#your diagnoses?#your scars?#my teeth are sharper and my words have more meaning behind them#you're a cheap trick and a fucking facade#you're just good at spotting prey#and you don't like it when we break out of the snares you set and bite you back deeper#the blood dripping from my maw always meant more than that of yours#sometimes people are just bad#and you're one of those cases
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#unsanitary mention#posting from the black plague#tumblr polls#disease mention#if you don't balance it I will diagnose your patient with a disease and tell you the cure for it from medieval times.
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BRITISH GP 2024 | FP2
#oscar piastri#*#diagnosing u with kitty#also why am i endeared by oscar sitting all squished up with lando in the middle seat... where is your oldest of 4 siblings privilege
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murderbot: I'm going to-- *remembers jokes about suicide are bad for its mental health* --make the best propaganda movie the rim has ever seen
#a dozen sporks speaks#murderbot#art-drone: you look like you're dying but your stats are great#art-drone: I diagnose you with 'artist'
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15 year old google psychologist on tiktok: you HAVE to be PROFESSIONALLY DIAGNOSED WITH AUTISM or else youre a FAKER whos STEALING RESOURCES from ACTUAL PEOPLE WITH AUTISM
psychiatrist: you dont act autistic. ok well i guess you acted autistic as a kid but not now so clearly something changed. whats masking?
psychiatrist: you experience a lot of traits of autism but you made eye contact with me for a bit so you cant be autistic
psychiatrist: you cant be autistic because youre too smart
psychiatrist: well you experience profound symptoms of autism but your brothers already diagnosed with autism and thats not possible for you both to be
psychiatrist: ok you seem autistic however youre a teenage girl. have you considered you might have borderline personality disorder/bipolar disorder instead?
*also when you get diagnosed*
psychiatrist: i cant advocate for your disabling ptsd to the government, i can only do autism. yes i know your autism isnt the actual problem here but have you considered that youre just being autistic about it?
psychiatrist: i cant write a letter of recommendation for gender affirming care because youre autistic. yes i know you work a full time job and live independently but youre not capable of making these decisions
psychiatrist: *doesnt try to treat/talk about anything but the autism*
the 15 year old again: i know you SAID youre diagnosed with autism but i dont believe you because anyone can say that, so im going to continue to harrass you about it anyway
#personal thing bc like#dont get diagnosed w autism unless you have to#its not worth it#there are no resources unless youre in school or need disability#autism#actually autistic#autistic#neurodivergent#tw medical ableism
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girls when their issues get dismissed as anxiety for the millionth time
#futaba sakura#persona 5#p5r#p5#fanart#futabadoodles#chat i am SO losing it#went to get diagnosed w adhd wasnt diagnosed because and i quote “it could be anxiety” omfg#neurotypical psychiatrists especially white ones die in a hole 🥰#also because i “wasnt struggling enough”#like hi so i have this thing called emotional intelligence a good support system and access to coping skills hope that helps!#god forbid a neurodivergent person has tools to manage their condition and isnt in hell everyday i guess!#hate her ass!!!!!!!#i wasnt looking to get diagnosed for medication or support bc i already use a lot of like adhd specific supports and shit#and w accommodations my anxiety diagnosis can cover what i need for the most part so it was rlly just a validation/confirmation thing#like idk yeah. i am managing. im not particularly struggling. because ive been selfdx for a while and have implemented changes in my life#and i happen to be in a very very good place rn and im very lucky. so like. ???#rlly felt like “you have all the symptoms but youre not struggling enough with anything to be able to diagnose ypu” ok thanks fuck you#cuz ppl w adhd can manage being unmedicated by choice i js wasnt officially diagnosed before i guess its deemed “okay” to not live in hell!#dunno im frustrated. i have difficulties but i manage them well and i am very lucky to live an easy life for now so like 😭??
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Why is it so hard for neurotypicals to understand that it's not safe to be formally diagnosed with a personality disorder when they literally paint us as abusers and evil monsters at every possible chance they get?
#not putting my life in danger cuz you think a psychiatrist is correct 100% of the time and never ableist or biased#if i got diagnosed it would be used against me by the government if i were ever in a bad situation & it would automatically become my fault#because of stigma and how yall think we are all evil#now we cant be honest because you mfs cant quit your ableism#actually npd#narcissistic personality disorder#npd safe#actually narcissistic#npd#narc abuse isn't real#npd abuse isnt real
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Let's talk about after-school chapter 28!
I had assumed this interaction was what made Teru, our king of pettiness, go "You know what? I think I won't exorcise your evil spirit problem. Perish."
But?? Akane already had stiff shoulders at the start of their talk?? And Akane waited until it was near the end of their student council time to brag about his 'date' with Aoi.
Meaning Teru just let Akane carry the embodiment of stress and hatred on his back during their entire student council time??
I can't fathom why? This was not an 'I trust Akane to handle it' case, not when Teru was the one who enchanted his glasses so he know better than anyone how vulnerable to supernatural Akane becomes with it, and telling myself Teru needed to wait for the supernatural to feed on Akane to grow when this guy is a pro exorcist also feels like an excuse.
Maybeeee Teru was morbidly curious as to how Akane would fight the feeling?
Speculations on the insane decision to let Akane be haunted aside, their conversation is a trainwreck, shout out to how Teru instinct upon hearing Akane got a date is that his buddy is hallucinating.
I get his skepticism tho, pre-severance Akane you are... A lot.
"I love the part of her that invites me to go shopping" Akane, my dear, you need help. I know you're being honest but please find a less awkward way to be a lovesick fool. (---> I say, knowing full well he'll need to go through a traumatic feelies talkies section in Death's house first)
"cya!" is just cute to me. Look at this smug ill-informed dumbass.
"Hey, the flowers behind aoi are different this time," I think in surprise, even tho realistically Akane must associate Aoi with the entire garden at this point.
And here comes the professional thrid well, the prince himself! His mere presence means Teru actually fell for Akane calling the shopping trip a date though, he gives Akane too much credit.
Teru knowing Akane well enough to translate his stammers of a pathetic creature into "Why are you here?" is beautiful, bro is better at his side gig (pester akane) than his main job (be an exorcist) today.
Aoi's "I know a liar when I see one. let's indulge him anyways" she truly is a kind soul.
Speaking of said liar, I love that Teru doesn't have a basket or shopping cart.
He isn't even trying to pretend he had plans to go shopping, what a guy.
Aoi getting excited over dirt and fertilizer, my girl <3
Shout out to Akane for being happy that Aoi is happy and to Teru for finally figuring out that he doesn't need to sabotage anything cause there is nothing to sabotage.
Teru: *speak*
Akane: and away goes my joy and whimsy.
Love Teru trying to bond with Aoi right after the realization this is a hangout. He wastes no time.
Aoi telling Teru the truth is sweet, I'm glad they are getting closer. Also happy to see Teru remains shameless.
Aoi gave him the driest look possible and Teru still put carrots on her basket. He even said "buy it" SO HE WOULD HAVE MADE HER PAY FOR THE CARROTS.
YES AOI REPRIMAND HIS ASS!
She really treats him like a dog! Is incredible. From her 'grrr' to the way she points a finger at him, it gives me "bad dog! Drop it!" energy.
Fascinated by the way Teru blushes. He seems to be more hung up on being called 'bad' than anything, but he definitively liked being reprimanded, he is still blushing when he walks instead of displaying the dejection of the convenience store.
He doesn't even give up on his quest to make her buy veggies.
Teru, you're doing horrible sweety, keep pestering her and you two will be inseparable in no time <3
Love how Akane snapped out of the curse's first attempt to make him spiral by refusing to be on the same level as Hanako.
He is so arrogant "What am i a loser? A pathetic toilet loser? Nah nah, I am better than that." like damn, okay bro.
I can't believe he pushed back against a curse by the sheer power of self-confidence and determination though, he is built differently. 90% of the characters in this manga cannot relate.
Love how Teru probably didn't suggest a single flower for Aoi to buy, trying to test if he could sneak even one vegetable into her basket, so his closeness to Aoi just made Akane's petunia suggestion look that much more thoughtful in comparison (she does look very happy to be given an actual flower).
Rest in peace Teru you suck at sabotaging.
(Or he would suck if that was the goal! He stuck around for this entire hangout despite how rare his free time is. He got his ice cream, he even walked Aoi home, he just want to hang out. Same vibe as when he went "Oh aoi come with me to the festival, Akane will be there")
I find Teru's zoned-out face so cute.
There is no speech bubble to Terukane's first panel here, but i am 95% sure Teru was the one who asked to be notified about Aoi's gardening progress considering the '...' contrasting Akane's enthusiasm. Love that for him, yes talk to Aoi, get close to this closed off girl.
And Akane didn't like that iuguyguygyui
Teru can always just take off his glasses like Akane never fights that. Good for you.
I am still not over Teru just letting him carry this curse.
But now I really doubt he did it specifically to torture Akane, cause Teru likes helping Akane as much as he enjoys annoying him.
I wonder if he is proud of Akane for not acting on any of the negative feelings he was being fed, cause Teru looks genuinely happy here! It's a far cry from his usual 'bullying you relax me' or 'i am petty' kind of smiles.
...I may be biased but I am throwing my "Teru didn't exorcise the monster for this long to have an excuse to be hanging out with the Aois while tecnically doing his job." idea here. We do get a heavy confirmation he could have done something before and wanted to third wheel after all.
Teru wants to turn this couple into a tricycle so bad. What a guy.
"I hope I didn't act weird" That's an insane thing to think considering how you act near Aoi on the daily bro, you're lucky she is too down bad to mind your madman tendencies.
Peak weirdo to weirdo pining hell.
Speaking of which, she sent him a message to show off the planted flowers! She went out of her way to make sure he saw it, Akane never asked her to update him.
LOOK AT THEEEEEEEEEEM
"Thanks for taking me out today!" says the one who invited him. And 'taking me out'? to the hardware store? I swear I wouldn't even be surprised if she mentally referred to their hang-out as a date too. I love you Aoi.
"As long as Ao-chan had fun, I am happy" l know and I love you.
ps: Their height difference still sparks joy. The smallest girl in the block, the tallest boy in the group, and the perfect middle ground.
#this became a life reaction. I rambled so hard a 'read more' was needed so you know i got the 'hehe they <3' disease again#chap 120 who? haha idk what you're talking about! have some terukaneaoi#i don't know the timeline of when this happen but i find it so funny that Akane assumes Teru doesn't have a crush#knowing akane teru was diagnosed as 'you're too awful to have love in your heart' cause akane IS SO RUDE#tbhk#toilet bound hanako kun#terukane#teruaoi#aoikane#terukaneaoi#minamoto teru#aoi akane#akane aoi
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Why did no one tell me compression socks would change my life
#ive suspected i have PoTS ever since my mum got diagnosed#but now . damn#youre telling me it was that easy this whole time#all those years of fainting at the slightest temperature change or physical exertion#and all i needed was some hug socks????
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''the morning light, when it comes to me, it was there but I could not see''
Arthur’s life was profoundly shaped by his self-hatred, lack of self-worth and disbelief in the existence of kindness in a seemingly dark and cruel world.
I strongly disagree with the statement that Arthur only became a ‘’better’’ man after being diagnosed with tb. His struggle with his true/inner self is apparent as early as chapter one. ‘’You are not who you think you are, sir… which is lucky’’
He has lived a rough life, raised by criminals and surrounded by violence ever since he was born. It was installed in him early that his value lied within being a violent enforcer and he has lived this life since, knowing nothing else. As a highly aware person, Arthur's actions weight heavy on his soul. He accepts that his actions have consequences. He knows that a person who has caused so much suffering is not meant to have happiness in life. His way of life has caused him to believe that he is not worthy of love or redemption. He doesn’t want to believe that a person like him could be capable of any good. (a thing to note here is that imo, Arthur’s actions near his death weren’t attempts at redemption but rather a strong desire to do right and possibly be his true self.) This is why he keeps living as he does as it’s the only thing he’s ever known, it’s the thing that brings him profit, praise from the person he looks up to and he is already damned so he might as well continue living this life anyway.
The internal problem Arthur faces is that this violent, cruel way of life doesn’t align with what I’d call his true self/ideals. He is torn between the harsh reality he has known and an unconscious yearning for righteousness/love. To be able to carry on with his actions he must enforce certain ideals within himself, such as: I am bad, ugly, nasty, ignorant, mean etc. He also decides to see the dark side of reality, telling himself that the world is a grim dark place and this is just as things were meant to be. This is why he feels so uncomfortable being complimented for his good deeds, because a bad rotten person like him should not be able to do good. It breaks the image he has built for himself and he doesn’t want that happening. This can be seen a lot during the ‘’Money Lending and Other Sins’’ missions where he is unusually mean (even for his standards) to each of the debtors. Imo, he acts this way because he must truly convince himself of being a terrible man to be able to carry out a job which revolts him so badly. In the last debt collecting mission with J. John Weathers, it can be seen in his face/expressions how much he is struggling to put on a tough, uncaring, heartless act. He needs to maintain a ruthless persona to survive in the world he knows. He must convince himself of his own cruelty.
''Forgive me, but that's the problem. You don't know you.''
Contrary to Arthur’s beliefs, he is a naturally kind-hearted person who is unconsciously drawn towards kindness. And yes, even before he was diagnosed with tb. This can be seen in the people he respects the most and, in his willingness to help strangers (notice how he often does unnecessary acts of service for total strangers such as: carrying their things, holding out hands etc. even though they had already troubled him). Despite the life he has lived, Arthur does not enjoy violence, he does not enjoy hurting people. He doesn’t want to dominate over others. He thinks mostly about others and not about himself. This fact alone is very telling of his character.
He writes about Charles, a man who he truly respects: ‘’He’s a better man than me. He does not need to think to be good. It comes naturally to him, like right is deep within as opposed to this conflict between GOOD↔EVIL that rages within me.’’ A man who is not struggling with his inner self would not have written this. To me this clearly implies an inner desire to be a better man. He writes about his mentors: ‘’I love Dutch like a father, but in many ways, I love Hosea even more. He’s kind and fair and like a human being. Dutch is something else.’’ Clearly showing a preference for Hosea who is of a more gentle nature and shows genuine kindness. Unsurprisingly, these are the people who see through his dumb/though act and encourage him to drop it.
When he comes across Brother Dorkins for the first time, he writes: ‘’(he)was one of those innocent people who make you feel better about human beings and about yourself a little. Must be odd to see all that goodness in the world. Place always seemed dark and brutal to me.’’ Expressing how he does not see goodness in the world, implying lack of good examples/kindness/good experiences in his life. Yet, the monk leaves an impression and imo, this encounter (seeing genuine goodness) disrupts Arthur’s perception of what the world truly is. ‘’Just as evil begat evil your whole life long, so good may begat good’’ (what strengthens my belief in this, is the following, symbolic scene of Arthur realising the consequences of his actions right after picking up a crucifix. He was aware of them before sure, but is unable to truly ignore them now having seen it right in front of his eyes). If only Arthur was presented with more examples of goodness in his life.
''You have it in you... I can tell!''
His desire to do as much good as possible after realising he won’t live long is instant. This would not be the mindset of someone who did not already possess kindness in his heart. ‘’Know glory and forget about shame.’’ Arthur’s shame and self-loathing caused by his previous actions were what was holding him back from allowing kindness into his life. Knowing that he has limited time left has not made him into someone he wasn’t before. The diagnosis was a catalyst, allowing him to embrace that love/goodness truly does exist and accelerate the process of chipping away from the persona he has made for himself. This was a newfound understanding for him as in the past he was rejecting any notion of kindess. In himself and perhaps the whole existence of it. ‘’You keep hidden all that matters, even from yourself.’’
After being diagnosed, he writes: ‘’What kind of a man have I been? What kind of a man am I? What world is this we live in? A land of fury or a place of love? Am I being prepared for eternal damnation? Am I past any kind of saving? Is that all fairytales? Man ain’t got much good in him. I ain’t got no good in me… I don’t think and yet I see goodness. I see it. If not in me, in good folk. In Abigail and her love for Jack. In that silly monk. In Downes, I guess. Begging not for himself but for the poor, even though he was near starving himself. Maybe I don’t want salvation. Part of me has always longed for death.’’ This entry perfectly shows how deep Arthur’s self-loathing goes and just how much it has damaged him. As his journal allows a look into his true feelings, he truly does not see a single good thing about himself. He knew for a long time that the way he lives is detestable but he could not let go of it. Not because he didn’t want to, but because it’s all that he has ever known. He didn’t believe in anything else. This sudden acceptance of goodness has allowed him to see clearly, which was obscured from him before, and for the first time, enabled him to act free of past regrets for what is right.
⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪
Arthur’s redemption is not about becoming a good man. It is about finding the strength to change and recognise your true self despite a lifetime of self-loathing and breaking free from destructive beliefs of the past.
In Arthurian legends a stag is a symbol of the unending quest of spiritual knowledge/enligtenment
#this is my own personal interpretation of arthur's redemption#i could expand so much more on this#the orange quotes are by blind man cassidy#please don’t even interact if you think arthur was just a killer incapable of goodness before he was diagnosed#the ironic thing is that so many people could see behind arthur’s front but he was blind to it#arthur morgan#red dead redemption 2#rdr2#this analysis is based purely on high-honor choices#i don't care if your arthur shoots up entire towns this analysis does not take individual open-world gameplay decisions into account#i did almost cry thinking about this#text post
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kit and willoughby book side characaters kit and willoguhby book side charactesr
#there's the sumners nash and winona the weird ranch family who hires kit#then there's willoughby's parents bobbie and buck#then kit's friend bea and the sumner's estranged daughter abigail#i didn't make the dead sumner son. idk i feel like if it was a movie i'd never show him. 🤷♂️#but anyway yes sumners are very weird and secretive they hire kit when nash gets diagnosed with lung cancer and can't take care of the ranc#some stuff happens. and thats the book#ts4#ts4 cas#the sims 4#kit#willoughby#do i tag all of these ppl youre like never gonna see them#nash#winona#bobbie#buck#bea#abigail
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hyper fixation too strong… life going too well… may have to pick up the pen and go back to ao3
#for the plot#ao3 author curse#last time i wrote a fic more than 16k words i was diagnosed with dka and in the hospital for a week#i have diabetes now and i fully blame solangelo#fuck you will solace look what your gay ass has done to me#anyway i can’t escape the x men#if i write scott summers fluff do you think the ao3 gods will curse me for it#x men#scott summers#x men comics#ao3#ao3 fanfic#deadpool#wolverine#deadpool wolverine#logan howlett#cyclops#jean grey#x men 97#x men evolution
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[A home you thought you couldn't return to]
#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun#trigun art#trigun maximum#posted this on instagram and then realized...yeah...i have a tumblr blog too...and scooted before it could grow cobwebs#Sorry for inactivity I got diagnosed with attenuated psychosis at the beginning of the year so that's that#doesn't stop me from thinking about wolfwood anyway#The tragedy that what you wanted was just within your grasp had you let yourself reach out#Were you encumbered by the weight of your bloodied hands? or was it the fear that the heaviness would bury another had it landed on them
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They're going to make me lose it probably
#I diagnose all 3 of them with C-PTSD#The LoL cinematic came out in the middle of me drawing this so I immediately drew Mel LMFAO#Originally I was just gonna draw Jayce which is why there's a giant Jayce in the middle lol#I genuinely want Viktor to keep his machine herald form post-canon but without powers and Jayce to still have the hexcore infection#y'know like “consequences of your actions follow you throughout your entire life” kind of deal#I'm not letting any of them rest#fanart#drawing#art#arcane#arcane mel#arcane jayce#arcane viktor#jayce talis#mel medarda
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In the cooking ask, you said Wing Dings has a hard time cooking if instructions aren't clear enough, and as an autistic person who feels that TM every time I'm given instructions, is your Wing Dings supposed to be autistic? (I'm also going off the head canon for most of the fandom that canon papyrus is autistic, as he certainly does act like myself) (There are way more things that canon paps does that make him seem autistic, if you havent heard of it you should check it out)
OHH! Yeah I've heard of it and I totally see Papyrus as autistic!
And so Wingdings is also autistic!
At least I'm trying, it's implied
It's not really relevant to the plot, but it's something I find relevant for his characterization personally fjefnekfjef
See it like this:
Wingdings is autistic but he's VERY high masking (dude, that's bad for your health)
And Papyrus is also autistic, not as high masking, but he does try, he's just not that good at it
It's a detail I personally like c: because yes, so many autistic people relate to Papyrus (me) and I want to keep that...even if it's not a canonical aspect but it's canon to me
#Honestly I'm using a lot of my own experiences to write Wingdings in these cases#It's great!#AND IT MAKES WINGDINGS MORE PAPYRUS WHICH IS OBVIOUSLY MY INTENTION SINCE THIS IS A “PAPYRUS IS GASTER” AU#I'm not officially diagnosed with autism but#uh#trying to get one soon when I move out#I DO wanna clarify that#Okay I JUST had this thought but#LMAOO#IF WE TAKE INTO ACCOUNT WINGDINGS' PROGRESSION INTO PAPYRUS#IT'S LIKE#ONE DAY YOU WOKE UP AND YOUR MASKING SKILLS WERE GONE AND YOU HAVE TO DEVELOP THEM AGAIN IFHKDSF#I would be so mad
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autistic things are happening...
decided last night to go through each alpha couple song in rough chronological order and try to figure out a more clear cut version of the story... i am already having so much fun with it and i'm only a few songs in
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