#chat i am SO losing it
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girls when their issues get dismissed as anxiety for the millionth time
#futaba sakura#persona 5#p5r#p5#fanart#futabadoodles#chat i am SO losing it#went to get diagnosed w adhd wasnt diagnosed because and i quote “it could be anxiety” omfg#neurotypical psychiatrists especially white ones die in a hole 🥰#also because i “wasnt struggling enough”#like hi so i have this thing called emotional intelligence a good support system and access to coping skills hope that helps!#god forbid a neurodivergent person has tools to manage their condition and isnt in hell everyday i guess!#hate her ass!!!!!!!#i wasnt looking to get diagnosed for medication or support bc i already use a lot of like adhd specific supports and shit#and w accommodations my anxiety diagnosis can cover what i need for the most part so it was rlly just a validation/confirmation thing#like idk yeah. i am managing. im not particularly struggling. because ive been selfdx for a while and have implemented changes in my life#and i happen to be in a very very good place rn and im very lucky. so like. ???#rlly felt like “you have all the symptoms but youre not struggling enough with anything to be able to diagnose ypu” ok thanks fuck you#cuz ppl w adhd can manage being unmedicated by choice i js wasnt officially diagnosed before i guess its deemed “okay” to not live in hell!#dunno im frustrated. i have difficulties but i manage them well and i am very lucky to live an easy life for now so like 😭??
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His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#tulu xuanwu#blood#Vomit on his sweater already; mom's spaghetti#I love drawing teenji because he gets to be a lot more expressive than Older Lan Wangji.#wwx is trying so hard to be supportive and it keeps backfiring for lwj.#“There's no way I would ever want you carnally ^_^” meanwhile the guy who wants him carnally is losing his mind in agony.#Hot tip if you keep finding yourself in Lan Zhan's shoes: consider being more obvious. Give up on trying to be subtle with an ADHDer.#His game is SO BAD. Abysmally bad rizz. I do not think it was possible for these to to have a chance to get together in this life.#He has no plan. He has no healthy outlet for his feelings. He is looking at his half naked crush and losing his shot.#F in the chat for Lan Zhan. He's just been accidently rejected and he is about to be accused of being straight.#Meta commentary moment: I am going to try very hard to be more consistent with outfits and details across comics#I have had some...difficulties in the past with forgetting details (COUGH the vermillion mark COUGH)#New year new goals! Wish my ADHD eyes and brain good luck!
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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#the beatles#mclennon#john lennon#chat am I losing it?#dunno if this has been done yet but I was listening to jealous guy and the swallowing part caught my attention#so word of the day: swallow!#mine
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Hi guys, this is usually what a doodle page ends up looking like <3 (oh, and @ancha-aus thought you might like this! Not writing but certainly fuel to my fire lol-)
This one is New Age filled!!! (Close-ups abd Lore beneath the cut!)
1) Night and Cross!
Night is actually very clingy once he's a teen. He doesn't usually realize it, but around the castle he'll snake to be closer to his Knights so long as there's no one he needs to keep his composure infront of is nearby. Cross is the one who's not used to physical touch (when it's not Ink ofc) so Night in his personal bubble makes his heart melt but also scares tf out of him <3
2) Error and Night's Meeting!
Error was carrying his whole life on his back and trying not to get arrested for unintentional property damage at this point, so when he saw the chance to get back at his brother and prove he was strong enough? Yeah, he got that on chance instantly. And was VERY smug when Nightmare chose him. (Also, Error is wearing gloves, so less Haphephobia)
3) Dream and Blue designs!
I think these are good tentative designs! Dream probably has a more regal fit, but he likes to play up that rugged exile look- He's inspired by Archers, while Blue takes on that classic Knightly-vibe. Their equipment is mostly stolen from Night's troops or brought with them from Blue's home kingdom.
Also, Dream is approx Killer's height at this point, shorter than Cross and *much* shorter than Apple!Nightmare. (Hc that Skeletons tend to be tinier in stature thanks to weird monster beauty standards. Horror and Geno's fam are outliers.)
4) Horror and Dust designs!
Horror is naturally a very *large* monster. He's very malnourished when Nightmare meets him, but by the time he's a Knight Nightmare has made sure that's no longer the case. He actually loves comfy, simple clothes, but to play up the whole 'strong mysterious' bit he wears a more barbaric Knight's garb. He doesn't mind acting scary, it's more fun that way :]. Dust is very very small, and envies horror sometimes for his size, but his tiny stature let's him control his body and move a lot quicker. He's very much based on a rogue, and usually covers the lower part of his face w/ a black cloth, and the upper part w/ his hood or mask. Dust only removes both to bathe, eat, or relax in a safe location. (Ignore that I can't draw the stupid gaster blaster lmao-)
These last two were space-fillers, but Cross and his Borzoi (Windmill, otherwise known as Milly (Killer named her-)) and really bad first wips of Ccino! I think Ccino was a chubby, happy toddler, but lost a lot of 'weight' (bone mass? Magic?) due to stress and pressure and bad eating habits. So it isn't until a while after the Coronation that he starts to relax abd feel safe enough to eat normal meals (Nightmare used to guilt him into eating snacks together, but as his boss (and younger brother) he can encourage it more often). By the time Killer shows he's still not quite healthy, but he's better. As more weight is lifted off his shoulders, the better he is. (That 'beauty' most people saw was a more stereotypical slimness, but Killer never stopped seeing Ccino as beautiful-) I think he never looked traditionally underweight, so no one noticed, and it was only much later that Night processed it. (And maybe it's why Dream hardly recognized him later on-)
#new age au#I love showing mundane life things-#and also these designs beamed into my brain#I can't draw Ccino for anything but the others? yeag#Blue is definitely my fave. and just like every au I will draw Blue perfect the first time and draw Dust 6 billion times 😔#Horror is kinda banger too tho#makes me laugh to imagine Horror picking up Dust mid-fight out of convenience and Dust weighs nothing to him#(also this size difference is exactly why Dust and Horror fight in the non-magic training. and why Horror accidentally obliterated his#shoulder later on lmao- Dust needs to be able to dodge any enemy. Horror needs to aim for small and quick targets.)#(Meanwhile Cross is the newest and Killer the oldest and if Cross adapts to Killer then he'll adapt to the others more easily.)#oh! and Ccino w/ his arc? I think I really like the idea of a Ccino with a plump body-type. but that conflicts with my vidion of Ccino kinda#losing track of eating and being co-erced by adults to skip meals just enough to make him the 'right amount' of curvy#so when Nightmare takes over it's a habit he's so used to he hardly notices that he's doing it. but. Night picks up on it because Ccino is#almost akways with him. their relationship is very much Ccino giving his life to help Night#but it's also Night recognizing that and giving it back to Ccino along with more the moment he can#just smth smth this au is full of fit and exercized people and I think Ccino deserves some comfort and healing and positivity <3#also I am SO fond of Nightmare getting up in people's bubbles. he does it most to Killer and Ccino for obvious reasons but#god forbid a noble be talking behind his back because he *will* twist around and shove under his knight's arms or sides just to#read them the riot act or stare them down <3#and I think when he was an adult Night was... kinda like the big brother? like. not an experienced one by any means. but he wasn't *not*#affectionate then either. he was better at being serious about it and more discreet. but like#Nervous Cross escorting him in public? Night nudges his shoulder briefly with a Tendril to try and comfort him. Dust having a magic overload#? personal Training against just Night so there was no risk of harming anyone else. then snacks and tea after.#Horror is homesick? Woah look at that a scheduled trip back to visit with Crop and side-track back to Horror's village? huh?? wild...#Killer upset at all? Night will find a solution. just you wait. a cat. two cats. perhaps even a cat in a little sweater? or y'know. just a#chat or a combat?#Nightmare showed his affections but was just more distant about it.#Oh also. all four were used to tendrils lifting/tugging them subconsciously. usually during trainings to avoid them hurting eachother by#mistake in their early days. Killer misses it sometimes
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dumbass supreme says 'yeah ill play a quick game of rivals before lunch why not' and gets mvp more at 1
#marvel rivals#snap chats#closing the game so i can live off the high of me thinking im actually good at this game ☝️#please ignore the losing streak i was on last night I WAS SO PISSED LIKE PLEAAASSEE IM NOT /THAT/ BAD AM I#I WAS LIKE 'ok ill just play until i win that should be like a game or two' AND THEN. i just never won.. i had to stop to finish my work...#NO CAUSE i was just doing some practice stuff and being more comfortable with magneto's kit#note: please use the enhanced sword when wanda's on your team i promise. she wasnt on my team this game but just in general#i always forget i have it 💀 BUT ITS DPS IS GREAT FOR ERIK no wonder that shit has a thirty second cool down#in any case. i was sufficiently locked in so i guess thats why i was hitting shots for once 💀#no chat you know what my ultimate high is playing this game. ult canceling vaJELVKAJERL#SPECIFICALLY IRON MAN'S like you just look at him and throw up a barrier .... hello .... im a master at this from ow ok. ... you are nothin#now if only erik said cutesy one liners when blocking an ult then my life would really be complete#for the first time i was caught in a magneto duel today. there can only be one you chucklefuck im bullying you#i have no idea how magneto is meta wise The Game Just Came Out but idc i will give him a menacing reputation#its only right !!!!! its lore accurate. me in the big Fuck You red and purple outfit I NEVER SEE OTHER PEOPLE WITH THE SKIN. BTW.#its worth it idc. ... . id buy it again really ..... its such a good skin .......#love how when i first saw it i was like 'eh idk' but now i wanna eat it and make out sloppy with it#IT JUST LOOKS GREAT IN MOTION LIKE OKKKK i woudlnt have minded a simple classic look either tho ...#... but ill take the emperor vibes ... theyre cool ...#ok bye ima actually eat now
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everytime i see clips and videos from early to mid s5, im shocked at how much of a demon planet was bc he gen was like....such a terror. and it makes me wonder how differently he wouldve been seen this season, especially by bacon and zam, if he had been able to maintain that image until the end. bc i truly do think him banning himself changed a lot of things, and i think its part of why both bacon and zam are so incredibly protective of and worried for planet this season.
#lifesteal#planetlord#prince zam#baconwaffles0#it is almost 5 am so i might just be chatting shit#but#i do think they dont want to lose him in such a scarily permanent way again#the fact that he was already banned this season made their worries sm worse LMFAO#like he was already incredibly squishy#but him actually being banned and the reality of the revive beacons scarcity becoming apparent#most definitely made it worse#cause there will be a point where planet could be banned by someone and be unable to come back#so they could just lose him AGAIN and there would be very little they can do abt it
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Ok i need to rant about the new update real fast so spoilers for book 7
You're telling me I have to WIN?? AGAINST OB! MALLEUS??? WHO HAS 300000 HP AND HEALS HIMSELF ALL THE TIME???? LIKE IM ACTUALLY MEANT TO WIN???? HUH????
#💙! mah's gameplay#spoilers in the tag don't read!!#anyways#bro what the heck do u mean i have to win??#like??? that's literally impossible???#it was so overpowered i was like “oh ok it's one of those fights where you're meant to lose”#but then they don't give me the next chapter???#you're telling me I have to WIN??? AGAINST THAT MONSTROSITY???#HOW THE HECK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THAT???#bro someone tells me im crazy and my game is being weird there's no way that i have to win#like I'm in denial actually#chat am i misunderstanding something
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THEORY THEORY THEORY!!! ECHO ZANE/MR E IS GOING TO COME BACK IN DRAGONS RISING
credits to @user-without-a-cool-acronym because it was this post by them that got the gears turning (ba-dum tssss) in my brain about this 🙏🙏🙏🙏
OKAY SO. there has been a strange lack of zane content in dragons rising. that, and everybody under the sun has noticed he has been acting weirdly more robotic than usually. theres a screenshot of a twitter post SOMEWHERE that i KNOW i saw and thought i saved but now cannot find, where doc wyatt says something along the lines of the writers are working on a bigger plot focusing on zane. i think that plot is going to involve echo zane. and, the administration. there are a few too many loose ends with the administration for comfort, even though it would seem like its plotline is over now that jay isnt there anymore. pssst, its plotline isnt over.
there are multiple scenes where nindroids are shown working at the administration. not being collected because they are 'equipment.' just working there like any other. so why does the administration consider zane specifically 'equipment'? and also, who is in charge? it is mentioned at some point that there is a head of the administration, but nobody actually knows who they are. who else was always behind a mask, always a mystery, nobody actually knew who they were? MR. E
of COURSE he would want zane to be considered equipment. just like he was. of course he would shove zane, who seemed to be so skilled at administration work, in the mail room.
and, it would tie into zanes plot as well. all of the identity problems after the 'zane competition.' "am i not the zane i once was?" imagine those problems after meeting a replica of himself. a replica who he wouldnt know existed, since seabound was reversed.
echo zane/mr e is absolutely coming back. he will not be obsolete.
#posts#crazy? i am crazy currently.#ninjago#ninjago theory#echo zane#echo zane ninjago#echo julien#ninjago echo zane#zane ninjago#ninjago zane#zane julien#mr e ninjago#ninjago mr e#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA im so normal cant you tell 😊#wow a post from me that isnt morro related?? shocker#chat i am losing my mind (does a little dance)
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Helsknight 💞❤️✨💞💖💘
Younger me would be proud I think (and also madly in love with helsknight if he knew who hels was)
#art#artists on tumblr#jaloparker art#hermitblr#hermitcraft#hermitcraft fanart#helsknight#helsknight fanart#RRGGRGGRGAGGGHRRGRGGRGRRGGGRR#<- me when helsknight#i fr like giggle and twirl my hair and kick my legs when i see him sometimes..#chat im cooked#im so done for#cooked beyond recognition#fried#pan seared#burnt even#RAAAHGGHHGHHRHRVGAGAGGGRGGAGGG#I WANT HIM TO BE REAL SO I CAN HOLD HIM GENTLY#theres a hurricane coming for me while im writing this post#going to stay up late with the power out thinking about helsknight#(either him or the fact that i am drenched in sweat we'll see)#i should definitely have power back by the time this posts so dw im fine (writing this on wednesday sep 25)#happy October to those reading my deranged tags#genuinely so sorry to those who read the tags i put on some of my posts 😭#im losing my marbles
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just did the math and i have to write approximately 42k words in six weeks to finish AR when i originally intended to 🫠
#chat i might be cooked#oh lordy that is a lot of words#and i am just a blob#i was also looking at my outline and realized i might’ve fucked up with the original chapter count but i don’t want to end on an odd number#but i also don’t think i could theoretically write two more chapters worth#unless i split some stuff up and maybe made chapter 20 an epilogue ish#i just don’t think i want them to only be together for ***** chapters and have it end#but i also tend to lose interest when couples get together in books and the current outline stemmed from that#but i also want the people reading it to get SOME time with them as a couple so idk#my defense is that i am not a planner i am a pantser masquerading as a planner#i am never writing a longfic as i post it again i have learned my lesson amen#my writing#after resurrection
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Are we still friends?
#drawing#bill cipher#gravity falls#procreate#billford#doodles#doodle#book of bill#small artist#gravity falls fanart#stanford pines#gravity falls stanford#stanford gravity falls#stanford x bill#the book of bill spoilers#chat im losing it#CHAT FORD LOOKS GOOD?#I am getting better drawing him—I’m so happy#illustrators on tumblr#illustration#my art#artwork#artists on tumblr#gravity falls fan art#digital art#art#drawings#I’ll be drawing Stan next#Ngl my Billford obsession is dying
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This is golden. (Also I’m sorry this became long!!!) Angelface finding the group chat and deciding to up the ante though. Making the punishments fit the crime via teasing. Seeing how far they can go till someone makes a move on her. They wear shorter, more revealing outfits around the house, purposely turning their back, or bending over, or leaning onto the counter so their chest is squished up against their arms, and twisting their head for ages to talk to Steve, who’s trying desperately to not look at your perked out ass, long enough till you hear Robin putting her phone away after she ‘subtly’ takes a pic. Being much more ‘nosy’ to see what your roommates are doing on their phones, loving the panic that flashes across each of their faces like clockwork. Eddie literally throws his phone across the room that day. Makes sense, once you see the video taken during last nights slumber, he was uploading at the time.
Begging Steve for his special drinks, every night and day. Even after finishing one, you make sure to scoop your tongue so deeply around the cup, or the ice cream glass, getting some white whipped cream on your lips. Pulling needily on the hem of Steve’s shirt, while you beg him to make another one, because they just taste so good! And they make your tummy feel so full, for some reason. You read all his dirty little fantasies he posted, you always make sure to cup your tummy when swallowing his creations, more eagerly and noisily than before.
Asking Eddie if he can sleep in your bed tonight, and he obviously says yes, buying whatever excuse you give. You make sure to sleep in just your panties with your shirt. Cuddling up to Eddie by shuffling back closer, and being the little spoon, sitting your nearly bare ass on his thighs as you ask if this is okay. Smile facing the wall at the panicked way he says “yes!” Pretending to be ‘adjusting’ all night to get comfy, as you wriggle right into his crotch. Serves him right, how hard he has to try to not get noticeably hard. You also make sure to wear the tank top that lets your boobs roam free in your sleep, every single time.
Telling Robin you’ve got a bit of an oral fixation, making it sound like an innocent statement, for response to why now, you’re constantly randomly biting her out of nowhere. Just sinking your teeth into her shoulder, or her belly, or her arm, latching onto it and drooling around it. Mindlessly gnawing, or slobbering, for minutes. Stuffing your head deep into her lap, while you take her fingers and start nibbling on them too. You actually don’t even realise when you start sucking on them, clearly already part of your subconscious, until Robins rubbing her thighs, getting wet while you’re head is in her crotch, and you’re sucking her fingers. Having become her own Pavlovian response, that makes her want her fingers inside of her already. Her pussy leaking and throbbing, as you suckle warmly and wetly on her fingers in the quiet room. And she can’t move, because she’s scared of giving herself, and all of them, away
Asking Nancy to watch a movie with you in bed, and giving her a pillow to sit on because your ‘mattress is lumpy’. Putting on an almost porno movie though. As you watch her squirming, devolving into small humps against your pillow. She’s trying not to, but her hips just won’t stop rolling. And another day you give Nancy a very cute pout, asking if she can help you, only to tell her you think the dryers broken, because you put on your underwear and it was still wet. Pulling your skirt away to show her the panties you’re wearing, that you watched her rubbing herself in, and squirting through, in the video she shared with everyone but you that morning. You see her grab the table for relief, watching a professional smile rush across her face, smiling yourself because you get to watch your strong Nancy crumbling, as she promises she’ll get Steve to look at it for you. Leaving with a hand against her heart.
You make sure the punishments fit the crime. Until they get it, or they pounce
BROOOOOOOO I AM BITING THE TABLE!!!!!!! IM FUCKING FERAL RN UR BRAIN IS SO HUGE 😵💫😵💫💦💦💦 THROWING THEIR PHONES!!!! IM--
#i am speechless u are SO bigbrained#bye im losing my fucking mind#fruity four#fruity four x reader#perv!fruity four#steve harrington#nancy wheeler#eddie munson#robin buckley#st 4#stranger things#ellie chats#anons
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"hey!"
"Name's Mal but you can call me Encrypt!"
WJATS H2AYT WHAT HWtawh W2HAT WHAT WEHYAT WHAT WHTAHTWHGASJHGCJHSDGCKHSECSHGSDBCDLHCGDLSVCHGKBVCLCHGSELKJFGSDL;KJFGSLJCBDSKJGJDSSKHJGSOFUYTLDJAGOUYGFLHCVLDFYVGFJKHBGWOKGVBDOUVYREOUFBSIUDYVCLFBHF
H ELLO
#H ELPME OH STARS ABOVE-#KJUCGVKSDFGCJDCGOSEYGCDSHGCDGJSICUWQODUSEFKJHSKJDGKFJHEGSLGKLJDHCOEYFGETASGCJLHDGCIUOSYTEOFUYGEJSDOCUYEPIRUFHWQULGCKJSDHFLAYPFEIUHSJHLS#I AM#LOOKING#SO HARD#HELLO#WHATR#HHHHDGFSHCBSJCBKJDBCLJKSDGKCJBDLCHSDJCGDSKJ HESSSO PRERTRY#JESUSES#I M LOSINCGTC#CHAT ISTHIS REASL#FUCKJ DUDE#OU HHH IM GOIN G CRAXZY#HELWEPKDCHGSDCVJKGSDJCGKJSDHCGLSDFHVGKJHDSGCOYURGTKLJCHDGCHJGLVCJHDKCSDLCHJGKLCHGSDKJCFKSDGHCLSJCKLASGCUISDYTCKASGCSYUCGKJHCGRUITFGHCISUGFL#HEL P#DJKCGKSJCGDJHGKSKJHGCKAGHKHCGSDKCV#IM LOSING IT#IM GOING IANSE#DKCGSKJBSDC#H ELOP ME NO YOUVE REMINDED ME OF WHEN I HAD A CRUSH ION BILL NAURRRRDCJKSDGCKJDSGCJHSGDCKLJHSDGCLJSG#SGFDEFUYSEGDFLUYSTJHBCLDHGJCLUISTDELCLCJKSLCF#OGH HE LOOSKSSOCOOL HWRSRE#SHAKES Y OU AROUND VIGOROUS;LY#IM GOURING BONEKRER#SDHCGJKDGRHJGRHEGHRGEHJGHJEBRJHEGHEGBHGEHRGERGHEGRHGEHGR#MALWARE MY BELOVED#MUTUALS ART <3#BELOVED MUTUALS#F UCK ING HELL#<33333333333333333
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#nat chats#my art#og post#i drew this at 2 am can you tell?#im makin good money at my current place of employment but they're losing staff like a motherfucker#i'm the only one in my dept and everything would be fucked if i left#so where do i go?#make art for a living?#what if i grow to hate it because now#i depend on it for income?#i have adhd that severely inpacts my ability to self motivate#and yet?#theres so much i want to do#i'm wasting my one life for what?#survival?#no#i'd only realistically be able to survive a month or two on my meager savings#that i've spent YEARS saving#why blow through it all now?#to live#shut up#to MAKE ART#no. you're just going to have to find a shitty retail job to make ends meet#to WRITE STORIES#to feel what its like to WANT something and REACH FOR IT#TO LIVE TO LIVE TO LIVE
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if you as a fic reader ever become possessed by the urge to do a popularity bracket with the fics other people wrote and shared for fun and for free, consider:
don't ❤️
#just!!!! make a rec list!!!!!!!!!#popularity contests do nothing but drive writers out of fandoms by pitting people against their friends#and invariably result in people being assholes in the comments as if the people who wrote the fic can't see it#like ''oh clearly fic x is better than fic y''#or ''why is fic c even in this poll?''#nobody gains anything by you doing a bracket to see which fic is the ''most popular''#a stat which could be found more easily & less cruelly by simply hitting the sort by bookmarks/kudos button on ao3#anyway ugh. i saw that one of my fics was being pitted against one of my friend's fics in this bracket that's going around#and i have no idea who is ''winning'' because i refuse to look. but either way it's gonna feel bad!!!#because i want my friend to get his flowers so i want him to win!!! but i also would like to know that people like my fic!!!!#so it's just a lose/lose situation even though i generally don't give a shit about numbers#but this turns it into a schoolyard popularity thing#and the emotional response to having people *vote* on if your work is *better or worse* than other fic is hard to ignore#cannot reiterate enough JUST MAKE A REC LIST#or if you absolutely must do a bracket like this do it in a private chat server or something#don't create a public forum for people to pass value judgements where the authors can see it#and feel bad if they get told their fic is ''worse'' than someone elses#but also feel bad if they get told theirs is ''better'' because it came at the cost of telling another author they weren't good enough#ANYWAY i still feel sick with a super sore throat and a headache & am probably extra cranky because of it#(still testing negative thankfully so it's probably just weather/allergen related)#gonna go make some tea and prep the fic updates i want to post today#cass says things#fandom problems#wank adjacent
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