#genuinely so sorry to those who read the tags i put on some of my posts đ
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Helsknight đâ€ïžâšđđđ
Younger me would be proud I think (and also madly in love with helsknight if he knew who hels was)
#art#artists on tumblr#jaloparker art#hermitblr#hermitcraft#hermitcraft fanart#helsknight#helsknight fanart#RRGGRGGRGAGGGHRRGRGGRGRRGGGRR#<- me when helsknight#i fr like giggle and twirl my hair and kick my legs when i see him sometimes..#chat im cooked#im so done for#cooked beyond recognition#fried#pan seared#burnt even#RAAAHGGHHGHHRHRVGAGAGGGRGGAGGG#I WANT HIM TO BE REAL SO I CAN HOLD HIM GENTLY#theres a hurricane coming for me while im writing this post#going to stay up late with the power out thinking about helsknight#(either him or the fact that i am drenched in sweat we'll see)#i should definitely have power back by the time this posts so dw im fine (writing this on wednesday sep 25)#happy October to those reading my deranged tags#genuinely so sorry to those who read the tags i put on some of my posts đ#im losing my marbles
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Genuine observation, no sass and no disrespect, but being someone who is chronically OFFline & an active volunteer/activist for over a decade, and seeing what people say is "crucial discourse" online is... Quite the trip, honestly.
#vee vibrates#I understand that some things are more important to others than they are to me but.#I really need people to understand that sometimes you're better off volunteering at a shelter of ANY kind if you want to commit real change.#Online advocacy is crucial but man am I worried as hell for the kids that don't seem to understand that offline is even moreso.#And being disabled + queer myself I know that it can (and often is) a safety and accessibility issue but zoouniverse.org exists.#That website where you solve history and math quizzes to give rice to impovrished families is online.#Just. Anything that puts this aggressive ââadvocacyââ to rest. Ego will be the death of us and we don't need anymore of it.#And if anybody reads this and finds themselves getting upset ask yourself this: Why does this upset me? Do I see myself in this?#Because you'd know that I am speaking out of genuine desperation when I say all of this.#I am not any better than any online activist just because I do a lot of work offline.#I am just so fucking tired of seeing people misdirect their rightful frustrations and fall further prey to the elites' divisive desires.#Is it so much to ask of you all to finally be angry at those who truly make our lives miserable? Or are we just going to keep playing cop?#At the end of the day it's your choice. I cannot force you. However you will grow old one day and look back. Remember that.#I for one don't want to have any regrets about any time I wasted on bigots and trolls and people who have already decided on their opinions.#I want to look back and be grateful for the opportunity to help so many people as many helped me in my direst times of need.#I think that's the difference here. A lot of online folk didn't go through the poverty & severe abuse & bigotry I faced since I was born.#I went through hell and came out kinder in the end because I was at the end of the proverbial whip myself at several points before 16.#But trauma doesn't make you compassionate. You choose to be. And I choose to never repeat the cycle.#The day I do is the day I've lost both my mind and my spirit. I will never repeat my family's & abusers' horrific mistakes.#I will be kinder to a world that needs kindness now more than ever. Even if I scream my throat out forever doing so.#I don't need a voice to be heard.#Anyways sorry. I woke up on the desparate side of the bed. Thank you to all who fight the good fight.#Despite everything I've said I have so much more faith and hope now more than ever. We will prevail.#And thank you if you read all of these tags?? Safety love and solidarity to you you're the MVP. ;_; đ
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Change My Mind [4]
Pairing: BTS x reader
SUMMARY: As a make-up artist, you were expected to glamorize your clients with brushes and products that cost a week-worth of food, not to befriend them outside of work, let alone have them save you from dates yet here you are five years later as one of their closest confidants.
Being a stylist of the world's biggest boyband is no easy feat, someone is doing flips, someone can't stay still and one's asleep but its fine, you can work around their chaos but then one day, you find out they're all your soulmates, a whole different can of chaos you don't think you can handle.
Tags: Soulmates AU, Friends to Lovers, Eventual Smut, Not Beta Read, Slow Build, Polyamory, Attempts at Humor
Words: 7.1k
nothing much to say this time but this is not beta read, my friend who was supposed to read it is unfortunately unavailable, idk if the argument makes sense in the end cause I personally run from confrontations so idk how to write good arguments so yeah.
ANYWAYS, Happy reading!!
<<<Prev || MASTERLIST || Next>>>
TAGLIST: @wildestdreamsblog @canarystwin @prettywheenicry @jmnscutie @sassy-snassy @misuguru @11thenightwemet11 @yoongibaybee @rinkud
___________
In all of your years working for Bangtan, as one of their staff and the youngest stylist, you've been included in every life events and celebrations there is. Birthdays, first wins, comebacks, everything there is even something as important as family dinners. You've never skipped or forgot a single member's birthday, period.
But as Guwon stands before you, a plane ticket to Jeju in hand with the departure scheduled tomorrow and returning just a day short before the tour, you find yourself at a crossroad. Itâs Jungkook's birthday tomorrow and Jimin has planned a small party tonight at their dorms before the formal celebration at the company the next day.
While you've been trying to rectify the awkward air between you and the maknae since his confession by starting conversations, the maknae only replied to you with silence before promptly vanishing in two seconds flat.
But despite the strain in your relationship, you could never think of not attending his birthday. You'd never thought to be petty enough to return his energy. His present was already wrapped in a pretty bow under your bed for a week now for Christ's sake!
âI-I can't⊠It's one of their birthdayâs tomorrow.â
âOh.â His smile falls. âCan't you just give your gift today? Surely they can party for one night without you.â
It was a genuine question, logical and true but for some reason, his tone raised concerns within you. You swear to the highest heavens you could hear a bit of irritation hidden beneath dejection.
You winced. âI can't, I'm really sorry⊠I-I can pay you back what you've spent for the trip. I'm really sorry, I just never missed any of their birthdays. I swear I'll make it up to you next time!â
Guwon's shine dulled the further you went on and your heart twinged with guilt. In another universe where some humans gained animalistic features, he'd have dog ears pressed to his skull, staring at you with wide and glistening eyes.
You waved off the image immediately, disturbed.
âIt's also my fault for not asking for your schedule. The tour is next week and then you'd be away from me for months so I kind of⊠panicked. I'm sorry.â
He should've known better than not to do research on your bosses , a voice at the back of your head scoffed and you waved the thought away as you put a hand over his.Â
âI should've notified you as well. Tell me if those are refundable or not, I'll pay you back.â
He waves you off. âCute but I've been raised well to know not to ask a lady to pay for my mistake, so don't worry that pretty head of yours about not being able to go.â
The date continued and thankfully, no dead air remained and conversation eased out of the both of you. Guwon sorted out his reservations early on, he'd stopped eating every once in a while to pick up his phone to either receive a call or respond to an email.
With how often he answered the chimes of his phone and how long it took for him to finally put it down, you figured he must've prepared a lot for the week and it made you feel more guilty every time he did it.
Today, he brought you both to an indoor park he rented for an hour for a picnic. It was on the outskirts of Seoul and he also cooked most of the food placed between you both, his mother however, was responsible for the side dishes.
Speaking of mothers, yours called earlier to congratulate you on whatever it was she was adamant on keeping secret but you already knew what it was and you were glad Jungkookâs mother gave birth on such a perfect day almost 21 years ago.
Guwon was planning to propose to you during the trip.
It left a bitter taste in your tongue. Sure you had expected to be married to him at some point but you barely knew the man outside of his colorful stories, and knew none of his actual behavior in his home. You haven't even visited his house yet for a vibe check so why is he rushing too fast?
Despite the guilt in your heart, relief is more palpable knowing you'd have more time to figure out if you truly want Guwon in your life.
Your phone vibrated in your pocket and you took a glance at it.
           [17:29] Jinnie: I'll pick you up at your apartment by 6.            [17:29] Jinnie: please be preparedđ
Seeing the t̶h̶r̶e̶a̶t̶e̶n̶i̶n̶g̶ friendly smile attached at the end of his message, you're suddenly reminded of the present. You hadn't told any of them of your date today, something that had drawn out longer than you thought it would. You frowned, fingers drumming on the side of your phone as you pondered on what to reply.
You had promised to help with the food yet here you are, out of town and on a picnic date inside a garden observatory.
âWho is it?â Guwon asks, seeing the frown on your face. Your mind immediately picks up the odd tone he has.
âTheir oldest, Jin. We're supposed to cook together before the rest comes home.â
He furrowed his eyebrows. âI thought the birthday was tomorrow?â
âOh, we're planning a small party before it, just his closest friends.â
Guwon nodded, eyes distant and thoughtful as he took a bite of his sandwich before continuing. âWhat time are you expected?â
âTheir eldest said he'll pick me up at six.â
He looked at his watch and frowned deeper. âIt's already 5:30. Maybe I can drive you to their dorm instead?â
You immediately shook your head. Remembering the promise you had with Jin and Jungkook. The maknae had recently begun to look at your direction again yesterday after Hoseok had talked to him, inviting Guwon would ruin the smallest progress youâve had.Â
Not to mention, you can't reveal their dorm location even if he is to be your husband. Company rules and you've signed an NDA.
âCompany rules, can't reveal their location.â
âIf we're going to be a couple soon, I'm going to need to know more about these guys you're hanging around. I don't trust them.â He says as he turns to the picnic basket to take another sandwich out, unable to see the twitch in your eye.Â
âWell, you have to learn how to, theyâre my bosses and my best friends.â
âIâm having a hard time believing that. I mean,â He scoffed. âDid you notice how they look at me whenever Iâm around? That rapperâYunâYoonmi stared at me like Iâm an insect he stepped on.â
Anger boils deep within your soul and youâre sure it's visibly contorting your face at this point but the man didnât notice it and continued chewing on his food.
âBesides, their location is pretty well known already, no? Just a couple searches away, why be so secretive about it?â
You refrain yourself from frowning and it takes all of the energy within you to not react as wildly as you wouldâve. It was amazing how the illusion of something good could shatter with only a few words and you set down the sandwich in your hand.
There's something terribly humbling upon realization that the man you're talking to is indeed, a man.
Noticing the shift in the air, he set down his cup of coffee with a slight raise to his brows.
âWhy are you looking at me like that? It's true though, I just think it's pointless to try to hide it when some people already know, so what's the use of trying to hide their dorm?â
Where's Jimin and Taehyung at times like this?
You dreaded the conversation you're about to bring up to your mother once she calls, and could hear her scolding you for having such high standards. Guwon being indifferent to the possibility of being stalked, and your boysâ privacy being breached immediately raise red glaring flags over his head.
A lawyer himself who shrugged at the threat of crimes, the joke just writes itself.
âDon't look at me like that, I'm just⊠trying to understand why you didn't want me to interact with them after our second date. It makes a man overthink, know?â
Whatever thread you were holding onto, a sliver of hope that you might've misheard or misunderstood him, decayed within you and you picked up your phone to stuff into your bag.
You had hoped, wished, that after your deep talk on the night Seokjin had scolded your ass to the nines he'd understand your dynamic better with the boys or at least try. You could already hear Yoongi's drawl out âI told you soâ as you packed up, even imagine him bringing up Namjoonâs statistical analysis and how I should've listened to it.
âIf you're implying what I think you are implying then I don't think we should meet each other anymore.â
Tossing the food back into the basket carelessly, you slung your bag over your shoulder and stand, only for his hand to shoot out to grab your wrist in an iron grip.
âWait, I-I'm sorry! I just got⊠jealous, that's all.â
Even with the apologetic look displayed clearly on his face and the fear swimming with them, nothing could bring back to life the trust you had on the man and you pushed his hand away.
âI can't stay with someone who can't understand why those boys are important to me, sorry Guwon but we're over. Don't you ever contact me again.â
âYou can't possibly be breaking up with me because I said what I felt? Over them? Really?!â
You don't even recognize the man sitting opposite you.
He knew, he saw how close you are with them and even sat through the stories you told him during your dates. Guwon knew you cherished every single boy in the group yet he disregarded it all because of jealousy? If that isn't a warning, then you might be blind.
âIt's like I never even knew you at all.â
He scoffed. âSame with you. Can't believe I actually believed your words telling me you were friends but I saw how those boys treated you!â
Sure your relationship with your bosses is unusual but it was built from hardship and loneliness from being taken away from home and surrendering their time for a glimpse of fame in a field where they're at a huge disadvantage. It was special in ways not many could fathom because in their head, what reason would there be for a man to befriend a girl other than having the intention to fuck them?
It was the mindset of the old and â wiseâ and it had infuriated you to the nines.
For him to reveal himself as one of those old cogs when he expressed himself as a gentleman and be convinced by his act of kindness, even the word disappointing could express how greatly upset you are.
âBet you've slept with all of them at least once, hell, I don't even know why your mother bothered when you're already busy whoring yourself for seven men.â
Anger flooded your veins, it was hot and rampaging under your skin. Before your mind could even register your actions, your hand had already moved, making contact with his cheek in one swift motion. The slap echoed like a clap of thunder in the silence of the observatory.
Even after seeing the angry red mark beginning to mar his skin, your anger remained.
âGoodbye Guwon, I hope we never see each other again.â
Walking away was easier said than done.
You got picked up by Guwon earlier and since you've run far enough from the indoor garden, away from your supposed ticket back home, you're now waiting for an uber at a small library sequestered between towering and loudly designed buildings. You had half a mind to ask your friends that lived nearby for a ride but decided against it.
They might be busy with their own family.Â
Unlike you.
As you sit there waiting for your ride to come, your mind takes you to your mother and her genuine glee at the thought of you getting married. Ever since your second date, she had been sending you photographs of weddings for inspirations, links to event places and tailors, and flower shops where you could have your bouquet arranged. She was beyond ecstatic, if she heard what had happened, she would be devastated.Â
A loud, exasperated sigh left your lips, the volume catching the attention of the bookkeeper who was quick to shush you.
As you waited longer with only the deafening silence of the library to accompany you, doubt began to form at the back of your head.Â
Was breaking up with Guwon really the right choice?Â
An angry, louder voice screamed at you for doubling down on your decision. You knew your boys longer than you knew him, if the trip had gone through, Guwon would've proposed to you despite the short time you've known each other. Something you didn't want. Not to mention, he would've gone through the idea while contemplating on your loyalty.
So yes, it was the right decision!
But you were to be married .
Your mother was so happy to have finally matched you with a guy you attended three dates with. The thought made your heart clench, she was excited to see you on the altar and has most likely spread it around your town with pride. She was about to have three married children.
Gods, you don't want to imagine the conversation later on, she'd be distraught.
Your phone buzzed and you dreaded looking at the screen to see your mother's name. Luckily, it was Jin instead.
           [18:01] Jinnie: where are you?            [18:01] Jinnie: knocked on your door but the neighbor said you were out.            [18:02] Jinnie: you're lateđ            [18:02] Jinnie: I'm going to have them deduct your pay this month for making me wait            [18:03] You: I'm sorry your highness for disappointing you, please forgive this servant of yoursđ€§ Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â [18:03] You: was on a date            [18:03] You: not that it matters anymore, I broke up with Guwon            [18:04] You: does it even count? I mean, we weren't official, he didn't ask me to be his girlfriend yet.
You paused, face souring as you realized what you've just typed.Â
Guwon hadn't asked for your hand officially even after three dates, he had the chance on your second date during the stroll but he didn't. Despite this, he went and asked your parents for their blessings when he hadn't even asked you first.
           [18:04] You: wow I just remembered that            [18:04] You: then he had the audacity to propose to me!
There's a pause in between his usually instant replies and you had an inkling he's already spreading the gossip around the group somehow.
           [18:08] Jinnie: wow there's a LOT to unpack there            [18:08] Jinnie: but worry not            [18:08] Jinnie: I'll have Jimin get us the strongest drink there is for later            [18:09] Jinnie: we'll drink that sorrow away and you're going to tell me what the hell you meant by proposing while not being official            [18:10] You: I don't think I should tell you that⊠           [18:10] You: considering⊠ya know            [18:11] You: also don't you guys have an early schedule tomorrow?đ€š Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â [18:12] Jinnie: bold of u to assume I don't want hear how massive of a failure he is            [18:12] Jinnie: nothing better than hearing your enemyâs downfallđ            [18:13] Jinnie: also what do you mean âyou guysâ???            [18:13] Jinnie: you're literally our make-up artist!
You scoffed at the message but before you could type up a reply, the notification from your uber app popped out to inform you about your driver now waiting outside the library and you walked out.
           [18:23] You: and just because I'm your make-up artist, doesn't mean I should let you all get away with this            [18:23] You: and I won't even drink much :pp            [18:24] Jinnie : if I ever see you stumbling around the house, you owe me 100000            [18:25] You: WOW            [18:25] You: AREN'T YOU RICH ALREADY????            [18:25] Jinnie: money is moneyđ            [18:26] Jinnie: just get ur ass over here already before I add more zeros to the bet
The smell of Jinâs cooking, both spicy and something savory, welcomed you first before the sound of sizzles did. At the sound of the door closing, Jin appears round the corner with an apron hung from his neck and a tong stained with red bean paste in the other.
Despite the disappointed look he's going for, reminiscent of a mother who caught her daughter coming home past curfew, the relief you feel upon seeing his handsome face after earlier was palpable and the knots in your stomach loosened.
âI should have your pay deducted for showing up late.â
You winced. âSorry boss, can I appeal for a heartbreak discount on that?â
âOnly if you give me a hug and cry on my shoulder.âÂ
He opened his arms wide, plush lips widening into a smile when you approached to wrap your arms around his torso. The fabric of his sweatshirt was soft and the scent of new laundry overtook his usual scent of freshly baked cakes and gentle vanilla perfume, it almost made you boneless in his hold. Moreso when he started stroking your head while the other ran up and down your back with his palm, fingers still wrapped around the tongs.
He didn't pull away despite the awkward position with him bending down and practically melting against your smaller form. In your years of being friends, you could never recall Seokjin being the first to pull away from a hug and once more, you're grateful for that.
âYou wanna talk about it?â
âIâll do it while cooking, we might burn whatever you're cooking if I told you all about it here.â
He shook his head, his rubbing motions on your back turning into gentle pats. âWe can just order it online if it does, I even bet that they'll still eat it even if it was. Hoba was relentless today.ïżœïżœ
His nails raked through your scalp and you resisted the urge to shiver.Â
âHe was being an ass towards you guys. Then when I defended you all, he accused me of sleeping around.â
His first instinct was to curse the man down to his ancestors who bred with each other until he was born, but stopped himself when he realized what he's about to say and cleared his throat.
If his arms coiled tighter around you, you only leaned into him further.
âNormally I would say "I told you so" but I know Yoongi has it covered later. So I'll just sayâ"
"Don't you dare. Jin donât you dare finish that sentence."
"I knew it."
He let out a cry when your hand slapped his arm but it quickly dissolved into a fit of squeaky laughter and he pushed your head back under his chin before you could even continue hitting him. Hand continuing their petting as you let out an annoyed groan.
âMy mom was so excited! God. I hate that bastard for disappointing me and her. She was sending me links to wedding planners and dressmakers because apparently he was supposed to take me to Jeju tomorrow and propose.â
He stills in your arms, the hand in your hair stopping its motion as his breath hitched in his chest. It took him a moment before he recollected himself and continued to pat your head, pressing a kiss on top of your crown.
âI'm sure auntie will understand, I know that she would've wanted you to find a good man like she and your sister did.â
A voice at the back of your head told you he was referring to himself but you threw the thought away as soon as it went.
âPersonally, I would've taken the ticket and ditch him.â He laughed and you hit his arm with a barely concealed grin. âAll I'm saying is that free things should be used and if it's gifted then better! You get to decide how to use it so refund it!â
âI don't think it's that easy.â
âJust say Kim Seokjin of BTS asked for a refund and they'll immediately accept it.â
Pulling away, you playfully rolled your eyes at him, earning you one last laugh as you walked to the kitchen where the sizzles of the food being fried on the pan had long been muted. Jin followed you with an onslaught of words spilling from his lips, justifying and detailing how he would've done in your place as you placed your bag down on the island counter before reaching for the spare apron.
Hearing his rants filling the silence made it easier to relax, made forgetting how upset you were at Guwon a walk in the park.
It was familiar and his voice, despite his fiery indignation, was oddly comforting.
Soon enough, your conversation halts and you both position yourself over the counter, following his orders mindlessly; which is mostly dicing the vegetables and the slabs of meat he marinated last night in soy sauce and spices.Â
You found the repetitive motions of chopping soothing and silently thanked the man now hovering over the saucepan, gently stirring the seaweed soup.Â
As if sensing your eyes boring holes on the back of his head, his ears reddened and he looked over his shoulder to meet your gaze.
âW-what is it? Wh-why are you looking at me like that?â
âJust admiring how huge your shoulders are and how reliable you are.âÂ
You recalled how dearly he cared for his group despite the exhaustion from practicing singing and dancing the whole day. Despite being the youngest in his family, Jin took on the mantle of the oldest brother in the group easily and selflessly provided for his members alongside Yoongi and Namjoon. If it were anybody, you were sure the boys would've been sick or had long given up, especially when the company was about to file bankruptcy in their earlier years.
From the bone shattering dances, exhausting practices and routines stretching from dawn till dusk, you were thankful Seokjin was there to catch the others when they fall.
It was a hard task nobody would've assumed since selfishness is a built-in trait of a human yet Seokjin proved you wrong when he stayed up every night despite the muscle cramps and exhaustion weighing his bones to cook for his members, taking the role of the eldest like it was a second nature despite being the youngest in his family.
He barked out a half-hearted laugh as his red ears brightened from the compliment. âI already know that of course!â
âThank you for everything, Jin.â
His face crumpled when he laughed bashfully, the bright hue in his ears crawling to dusk his cheeks as well. It didn't take long before he recovered and like clockwork, in reaction to being flustered by compliments, he got defensive and raised the saucer threateningly at you.
âYa! If you're planning to compliment me, at least be original! I'm done hearing about how wide my shoulders are from ARMY and how reliant I am from the others! We've been together for years, do better and be original with your compliments!â
It was a joke, obviously.
But staring at the older man childishly brandishing his cooking utensil like a bludgeoning weapon, you couldn't help but ponder about what truly pulled you into him only to realize that you've never truly dove deeper than surface level details. It was disappointing to find out how shallow you've been when expressing your appreciation for the man.
Like he said, you've always pointed out how reliable he is but never have you pointed out the small things such as the warm food he claimed have been extras and the hot soups sectioned off for you on cold days.
He was the first to approach you on the first day despite being the member who mostly kept to himself, asking you if you wanted to celebrate their Rookie of the Year win with them instead of the rowdy staff behind you.Â
The first one to build a bridge leading to this deep companionship you had with the rest of the members, have you really never thanked him for that?
âYou're so caring and humble despite your background and where you are right now. If it was anybody else, they would've left the boys to fend for themselves once they were able to yet you didn't stop cooking for them, for us. I don't think I have ever met a man so down to earth and as loving as you are,â You paused. âWell, except Jimin but if you want something more original I'd say I love your hands even when you think they're weird because theyââ
You didn't even realize Jin crossed the distance between you both until his hands clasped around your lips, silencing you completely.
Unlike earlier with only his ears blushing, his cheeks now glowed red, the flushed skin spreading down to his neck, continuing past the collar of his dark blue pajamas. When your eyes meet, you find his glistening with unshed tears no doubt touched by your hastily put together declaration of your appreciation for him.Â
When it was clear you wouldn't continue your rant, his arms fell to your shoulders and pulled you into a tight embrace.Â
His violent heartbeats thudding against his chest was the first thing you've heard before you registered the stuttered exhales and his gentle saccharine scent filling your senses, clouding your brain completely. For a moment, it was just you and him in the kitchen, hugging a little longer than friends should be.
But then again, since when have you guys ever drawn the line on how platonic touches should last?
âGod⊠You gotta stop doing that.â
âI'm just following what you told me like a good dongsaeng and I think I did exceedingly well on it. Does that guarantee a deduction on my pay deduction?â
There's an odd, invisible weight that lifted off of you, something you didn't even realize you were carrying. But there's also a tinge of guilt pinching the edges of your heart.
Jin was the first to approach you, and the first to confess four years ago. He was all shy looks and sweet smiles, his sweet words accompanied by a bouquet of flowers that must've cost him more than he could've gotten from being an idol of a new group.Â
When Jin loves, he gives his all and doesn't think twice to give half of himself as well. In a way, he and Yoongi were alike, just with different approaches.
He was open and unapologetic while Yoongi was subtle and often silent.
His laugh twinkled in your ears but it dwindled later on, as if he remembered something towards the end of his mirth. âYou're driving me crazy, how am I supposed to move on when you're this lovely?â
Hearing him confirm your suspicion about his crushâis it even called that at this point?ârelieved you from an unknown anxiety most likely sparked by Jungkook's words a few nights ago. Why are you even relieved hearing him still liking you when all you've done is hurt him?
âYou're such an idiot, you know that?â
âLove makes you do the stupidest thing but I don't think I've ever regretted ever falling for you.â
He pulls away, a gentler, softer smile now tugging his lips up.
âGod, you made me sappy! My god, my soup!âÂ
Even without the warmth of his embrace, you could feel it radiate in the small space of the kitchen. You continued your work as Jin fuzzed about the seaweed soup behind you, bathing in the domesticity of it all.
Your phone vibrates loudly in your bag on the island counter. Wiping your hand on your apron, you opened it to see Jiminâs messages.
           [18:56] Mimi: seokjin hyung told me to buy the strongest alcohol            [18:57] Mimi: any idea why heâs being weird?            [18:57] You: Iâll tell jin that you called him weird            [18:57] You: but yes            [18:57] You: Iâll tell you all later why            [18:58] Mimi: đ€š Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â [18:58] Mimi: not if I get you drunk in the first ten minutes            [18:58] You: Iâd like to see you try, pretty boy
Your phone vibrated again. Namjoon had texted you, seeing the preview you rolled your eyes.
           [18:59] Joonie: Seokjin hyung didnât say but I already figured it out            [18:59] Joonie: You'd hear enough from Yoongi hyung later but            [18:58] Joonie: I told you so            [18:58] You: I hope you trip and fall on shitđ„° Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â [18:59] Joonie: Love you too, noonađ            [18:59] You: blockedđ«
âI'm not seeing enough chopping, young lady. Get back to your station!â Jin jokingly scolds. With a laugh, you return to your spot.
By the time some of the boys arrivedâexcept Jimin, Jungkook and Taehyung, no doubt pre-gaming somewhereâit was already ten and some of the dishes were plated, ready to be eaten in the dining room. If it wasn't for both your and Jin's advanced thinking to ready the bowl of rice and their plates beforehand, they would have starved to death as Yoongi dramatically puts it before blaming Hoseok for draining them out the whole day.
The man in question just laughed in response before shrugging and rebuking their âaccusationsâ, saying it wasn't even that hard. To this, Yoongi grumbled under his breath and Namjoon rolled his eyes.
A few minutes later, the maknaes entered, cheeks all flushed except for Jimin who was holding up a bag full of canned alcohol as if it was game from an all-day hunt.
You thanked Jimin silently for drinking the birthday boy tipsy enough to make the dinner energetic instead of the awkwardness you thought it'd be due to what happened a few days ago. There's fleeting eyes you've caught in between jokes he made, either pouring with adoration or longing, you tried to not to pay it much mind.
But of course, the alcohol pouring could only go for so long before you're all lounging in the living room to talk about anything that comes to mind. It was half an hour short from the clock tickling to twelve, signifying Jungkook's actual birthday.
The conversation started off tame with Taehyung questioning the animals who sleep standing to something more elaborate with Yoongi asking everyone's opinion about some decrypt conspiracy theory surrounding the rich of the west. It was all fun and games when Taehyung, lost in his own mind running with the most random thought, sluggishly pointed at you and asked:
âWh-why aren't you checking your phone? G-Guwon hyung haven't been texting you yet?â
Many heads turned to you who was practically boneless in between a tipsy Hoseok and a still sober Yoongi. You didn't even need to look to know the look of concern Jin was throwing your way.
But everything was hazy, your head throbbing from the alcohol. The words slipped past your lips before you could think about it.
âWe parted ways⊠He accused me of sleeping around when I said I didn't want to go on a trip with him tomorrow âcause I didn't want to skip Jungkookie's birthday.â
Hoseok patted your shoulder and Yoongi nodded, face indifferent as usual. Despite the reaction of the boys on both sides, not everyone in the circle held the same opinion it seems.
âYou didn't have to decline it, noona. You-youâve been with us for years, missing one wouldn't hurt me much.â
Jungkook's voice was softer as if he had sobered up from the revelation and you waved him away.
âWhat are you saying? I couldn't leave when we weren't alright.â You glimpsed at Jin before continuing. âBesides, he was planning to propose and I'm glad he couldn't anymore.â
In your drunken mind, the information didn't carry much weight but the pin drop silence following your words did, you guessed that it must've been. However, it didn't last long when Taehyung jumped up to his feet and punched the air as if Korea just scored the final score in FIFA.
The boys look at him with wide eyes, shocked by his reaction. Jimin recovers and tries to tug him down but a drunk Taehyung is determined, with a will stronger than a monk's resilience and patience, no one could stop him from doing what he wanted.
And that was bumping his glass on your forehead, a little harder than it should've been if he was sober and you reel back, a hand over your forehead.
âNoona! you're free again! Do you know what that means?!â
âOk that's enough for you tonight. Let's get you to bed.â Jimin says, chuckling awkwardly as he stands behind his best friend, wrapping his arms around his waist before dragging him away.
âWhy? Can't I just congratulate noona from recognizing something was off instead of ignoring it like most do? Noona,â He turned to you, bottom lip jutted out. âIt's not bad that I'm celebrating right?â
Seokjinâs laugh was nervous when he rose to usher the man away as well. âAlright, lets all calm down so we don't accidentally say something while drunk.â
âFuck yeah! I-I donât even know why I even believed his lies, heâs a lawyer for fucks sake!â
âNot that it ever stopped you before. I still don't understand why you couldn't have married one of us instead.â Jungkook cuts in, suddenly irritated.
Somehow, the tension in the room grew tenfold and everyone sits up, alert and ready to interfere if their youngest decides to let the alcohol take control of him. Your brain clears once it registered the annoyance in his voice, heart dropping to the soles of your feet.
âJungkookââ
âI just think it's a bullshit excuse and you know it. You told that to Jin-hyung four years ago and have repeated it ever since. Weâre all adults now, we can handle a little rejection and whoâs to say we canât date when weâre the only idol running the company. You say it's because you donât want to choose but arenât you just instilling false hope in us?âÂ
He stood as he grew more agitated but Jin pushed him down, eyes stern as he stared down at their youngest. Seeing the conflict brew between them, the growing guilt built by years of spending time with them reawakened.
It tied your stomach in a knot and felt like a building had dropped onto your heart.
As if sensing your emotions, Yoongiâs hand found your shoulder to give it a squeeze.
âYouâre not thinking straight so stop it,â Jin excuses as he turns to you with an apologetic smile. âHeâs just drunk, he doesnâtââ
âI know what Iâm saying and I think youâre being too biased here hyung!â
âJungkookâŠâ Hoseok calls from next to you, voice low, a warning.
âYou too! Sheâs also your friend, why arenât you pointing out how sheâs just playing with us? Why are you only calling me out?â
âBecause youâre being a stupid drunk right now, Jungkook. Stand down .â Yoongi ordered, voice firm and warning. His arms are crossed as he stared their youngest down but the maknae wasnât intimidated by it, if anything, the fire in the older manâs eyes only fueled the anger boiling within him.
In years youâve watched over them, never once has Yoongi scolded their youngest past Run BTS contents, leaving the reprimanding to their oldest and leader. For him to call him out and seeing them grow agitated by each otherâs presence, dread loomed over you with your nightmares threatening to come true.Â
This isnât how tonightâs party was supposed to go.
âIsnât there anyone whoâd agree with me at how absurd all of this is?!â His head snapped at Namjoon whoâs watching with a careful eye. âHyung, surely you can also see it!â
Throughout the exchange, Namjoon had sat back and watched the interaction from the sidelines instead of interfering on the first hint of a fight breaking out. Even when the situation becomes a little aggressive, he stays silent but you donât doubt that heâd be the first to stand if the disagreement becomes volatile and inching towards physical.
That's what he always has done, observed and let the high rise of emotions eventually tides down to a calm on their own. He's a leader, he's supposed to be fair and to do so, he must first understand both sides before taking action. He also trusts his own team to temper their own ire after years of being together.
But now that he's forced to join the argument, he sighed and stood. Seokjin stepped away as he approached their youngest with both hands placed on his shoulders to sit him back down.Â
Obediently, Jungkook follows.
âWhile I do see where youâre coming from, I think it's a bit unfair that youâre blaming her for being scared.â Jungkook opens his mouth but a firm shake of Namjoonâs head shuts him up. âDonât start again. Thereâs a power imbalance here kid. If her choosing someone could cause a problem, weâd get off scot free but not her. In the eyes of the company, sheâs disposableââ
âBut sheâs not.â
âShe is. In their eyes at least. By having her around causing problems for us, sheâs nothing but a thorn in their side that they should remove. If she had dated one of us and eventually broke up, it would cause an awkwardness and riff between guys especially if it ended on a bad note and BigHit won't stand for it. You know how important this job is for her, right?â
They stared at each other for a long while, both unrelenting in silence. You all waited with bated breath, Namjoon was the only one who could diffuse the situation and if he fails, then who else could possibly calm the maknae down?
Turning to the clock, you bit your lip at the time.
It was nearing Jungkook's actual birthday, three minutes short before both hands ticked to twelve.
Which meant it would have to start during the denouement of an argument. The thought planting discomfort in your stomach. Such a happy celebration shouldn't be welcomed like this.
In the midst of raised voices and pointing fingers, Taehyung has completely sobered up from where he sat between Jiminâs thighs, staring beady eyed at the situation in his friendâs arms. Sensing your gaze, he turned to you with a sheepish, apologetic smile when Jungkook's heavy sigh broke through the silence.
His head fell to his chest as Namjoon removed his hands from his shoulders yet his eyes remained on their youngestâs hunched form.
âYou get what we're trying to say now, do you?â
âY-yeahâŠâ
âAnything you want to say, gguk?â Namjoon was talking to him like he was a kindergarten teacher and you both were kids who fought on the sandbox for the shovel, warm and understanding but the disappointment in his tone is clear as day.
Jungkook doesn't reply but he shoots up to his feet, surprising Hoseok next to you, with eyes still trained on the floor.
When he did look up to meet your gaze, it was brief and cut off by a deep bow. You reached your hands out, trying to stop him from doing so but Yoongi took one of your hands and pinned them down between his and your thighs.
Jungkook never had to bow for you and it felt wrong seeing him bent down to apologize.
âI-Iâm sorry noona, Iââ He trails off.
In his speechlessness in a room full of people whoâwhile understanding where he comes fromâstood behind you, he clams up and then in a flash, heâs gone, bolting from the living room and skipping up the stairs. The sound of his heavy footfalls echoing like the clock ticking down to his birthday.
The argument has been dissolved, yet it left a bitter taste on your tongue, it made you feel queasy having everyone back you up without reprimanding you as well. It was true, what Jungkook said.Â
Weren't you practically leading them on by not choosing anyone? No matter how unintentional it must be, if he thinks that way then maybe everyone else in the group does, just silently.
You turned to the clock again. A minute closer to the next day.
Frustration made you want to pull your hair out but the long, lithe fingers that have entangled with yours in the middle of it all, forbade you from doing so. As if he could hear the internal debate between logic and emotions, Yoongi gave you a comforting squeeze.
But it didn't feel right, you shouldn't be sitting on your ass while Jungkook blamed himself for expressing his own opinion, sure it was a bit aggressive but you understood his frustration.
âJungkook!â You called out, rising to your feet to follow him when Yoongi tightened his hold on your wrist and shook his head.
âHe needs time to process, leave him be.â
Yet despite this, you shrugged his hold off and followed the youngestâs heavy footfalls upstairs and presumably into his room. You caught onto him in the hallway, with the door to his room opened and half of his body already inside.
âJungkook, let us talk.â
âI-I don't want to see you right now, noona please.â
The desperation to correct the wrongs gives you a short burst of energy and you catch his wrist.
âJungkook please, Iââ
You heard the joyful chime of the clock downstairs before you heard the sweet jingles of bells.
Then you felt it.
Electric jolts shoot up from your connected hands, waking every cell and your mind awake and you almost keel over from the wave of relieving warmth washing over your body. Thereâs now a low hum accompanying the bells chiming in the background, the soft harmony between them sending shivers down your spine.Â
You've thought of first meetings like those scenes in Hollywood movies where a kaleidoscope of colors explodes behind your eyelids, like fireworks celebrating the precious moment where the protagonists finally meet and fireworks shoot up to the sky. They talked of a brief moment of reprieve from reality, the world slowing down and feeling the most calmed you've ever been with your soulmate in hand.
Like your soul finally recognizing its pair and suddenly, everyone became a blur in the background.
Yet when you stared back at Jungkook's mirrored astonishment, your stomach bottomed out.
Because no way in hell, after all this time, you're soulmates.
#bts x fem!reader#bts x reader#bts x reader poly#bts x y/n#bts x you#soulmate au#kim namjoon x reader#kim seokjin x reader#min yoongi x reader#jung hoseok x reader#park jimin x reader#kim taehyung x reader#jeon jungkook x reader#namjoon x reader#seokjin x reader#yoongi x reader#hoseok x reader#jimin x reader#taehyung x reader#jungkook x reader#ot7 x reader
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Teacher!James Potter x Single Mom!Reader đ 1.3k words
thank you to @moonpascal to beta reading for me!
⥠~ ⥠~ ⥠~ ⥠~ âĄ
You hated running late to things.
It wasnât your fault this time- Charlieâs sitter had been a few minutes late, and then he had thrown a tantrum about you going to his school without bringing him along. You tried explaining over and over that it was just a boring meeting for grown-ups- no fun, no snacks, and nothing he'd enjoy- but Charlie wasn't having it. Eventually, the sitter lured him away with the promise of cartoons, and you finally slipped out the door, already running five minutes behind. Cursing to yourself as you started your car, you did your best to avoid breaking any traffic laws as you hustled to the school. You made it there in record time, parking your car and running into the building. You werenât sure what to expect from parent-teacher night, but Charlie has been talking about his teacher, Mr. Potter, non-stop since school started.
You were grateful for the signs as you navigated down the hall and into your sonâs classroom. There was a small table outside the door with some empty name tag sticker sheets- one sticker was left, and Charlieâs name was written on it. You grabbed it and stuck it onto the front of your shirt, then nervously smoothed out your shorts, mentally slapping yourself for not putting on something a little nicer. You slipped through the cracked classroom door, trying to avoid drawing attention to yourself.
The other parents were seated at the tiny desks, chatting amongst themselves. At the front of the room, a tall, broad-shouldered man was laughing with a couple of parents. His dark curls were slightly messy, like heâd run his hands through them a few times too many. He wore a light blue shirt, the sleeves casually rolled up to his elbows in a way that showed off his surprisingly muscular arms, and he was gesturing animatedly as he talked. He must be Charlieâs teacher.
âAh! Mrs. Y/L/N, right?â
The moment you heard his voice, your heart skipped a beat. He was looking right at you, his smile wide and genuine. You werenât expecting to be called out like this, especially not in front of a room full of people. He made his way over to you, his eyes lighting up as if he was greeting an old friend.
âYou must be Charlieâs mom!â he said, his voice full of energy. âIâve been hoping to meet you.â
For a second, you were thrown off by his friendliness. Most teachers youâd met were polite, sure, but there was something different about him. Something warmer.
âYeah, thatâs me,â you replied, chuckling awkwardly as you offer your hand. âAnd itâs just Ms, actually. No other parent.â
âOh, sorry! James Potter,â he said, shaking your hand with a firm but friendly grip. His eyes lingered on yours for just a beat longer than youâd expected. âBut you probably already know that from Charlie. I swear, the kids are better at introducing me than I am. Theyâve got me pegged already, bad jokes and all.â
You laughed, feeling your shoulders relax a little. âCharlie hasnât mentioned any bad jokes yet, so I think youâre safe.â
James grinned, flashing a playful look. âGood to know. Iâve got a reputation to protect, after all.â His tone was light and teasing, but there was an easy confidence in the way he talked. âI hope heâs told you at least one good thing about me. Iâve been trying to bribe them with extra recess, so my odds should be good.â
âHeâs been pretty complimentary, actually. I donât think you need the extra recess,â you said with a small smile, putting your hands in your pockets. His eyes followed your movements slightly, but they focused back on your face quickly.
âThatâs a relief,â James said softly, smiling at you like you were sharing a secret. âThough, knowing Charlie, Iâm sure heâs a tough critic. Heâs one of those kids who doesnât miss a thing.â
âThat sounds about right,â you replied, smiling. âHe knows me better than I know myself. And heâs always asking questions.â
James grinned. âSame here. Heâs a curious oneâloves to figure out how everything works. I love that about him. Honestly, kids like Charlie make teaching fun. It keeps me on my toes.â You smiled as he continued. âBut listen, if he ever asks me to explain quantum physics, Iâm sending him right back to you. That oneâs above my pay grade.â
You giggled, shaking your head. âDonât worry, Iâm not even sure I could handle that one.â
âGood to know weâre on the same page.â He winked, and there was something about the way he did it that caught you off guardâlike heâs flirting, but in a way that feels easy and unforced. âHow are you holding up? I know kindergarten can be a big adjustment for parents, too,â James said suddenly.
You blinked, surprised by the question. You werenât prepared for him to be asking about your wellbeing too. âIâm managing,â you said with a small smile. âWorkâs been busy, soâŠâ
âTell me about it,â James interrupted seriously, feigning a winded look. âI swear, Iâm late to my own classroom half the time. You should see me in the morningsâIâm running around like a headless chicken just trying to beat the bell.â
You laughed again, feeling more comfortable. âReally? Iâd peg you as a guy who has it all put together.â
âHa! If only,â he said, shaking his head with mock exasperation. âTrust me, itâs all smoke and mirrors. But hey, as long as Iâve had my coffee, Iâm halfway there.â
The way he talkedâso easy and naturalâmade you forget you were in a room full of other parents, some of whom were probably annoyed by your ongoing conversation. He wasnât just making small talk; he was making you feel like you belonged there, like you werenât just Charlieâs mother, but someone worth knowing.
âI get it,â you said with a sympathetic smile. âItâs hard enough being a single mother. I canât imagine being in charge of that many five year olds, even if itâs only for part of the day.â
âWell, it sounds like youâre doing an amazing job,â James said, his voice softening, and suddenly, you realized how closely he was looking at you. You felt yourself blush as he said, âCharlieâs a special kid, and thatâs all you.â
You werenât used to compliments like that. Especially not from someone who was looking at you the way James was at that moment. âThanks,â you managed, your voice a little quieter than before. âThat means a lot.â
âOf course. And, hey, if you ever need an extra handâor someone to vent to about the chaos of kindergarten lifeâyou know where to find me,â James said with a lopsided smile. His tone was light, but there was something in his eyes that lingered, something that made you feel like he was genuinely offering more than just a teacherâs support.
You felt a flicker of something unfamiliarâsomething you hadnât felt in a long time. Was he⊠interested? Or were you reading too much into this?
Before you could dwell on it, James clapped his hands together and turned to address the rest of the room. âAlright, folks! Letâs get this show on the road. I promise to keep it short, but if youâve got any good stories to share, Iâm all ears. Iâm a sucker for a good tangent.â
The parents chuckled, and you found a seat, still feeling the warmth from your conversation with him. James was everything you had hoped he would beâopen, friendly, funny. And the way he looked at youâŠyou couldnât shake the feeling that maybe, just maybe, something in your life was about to change.
#lupinsweater#james potter oneshot#james potter x fem!reader#james potter x reader#james potter fic#james potter#james potter fanfiction#james potter blurb#marauders fluff#marauders fanfiction#marauders era#teacher!james#teacher!james x single mom!reader
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angel | jang wonyoung
synopsis : she was convinced everything you did was to seduce her.
pairing : wonyoung x 6thmember!femreader
genre : smut
tags : noncon, degradation, manipulation, gaslighting, objectification, wonyoung is genuinely a creep, blood mentioned, scratching, physical and verbal abuse, choking, slight mentions of tribbing, fingering, slight nipple play, just plain suffering tbh, death threats, âgood girlâ, âslutâ
!! warnings : this is like. PURE noncon so please please please read with caution and please for the love of god read the tags before continuing :(( !!
word count : 2.1k
a/n : okay i know i made the poll yesterday and all but look i had ideas and here they are I HOPE YOU LIKE IT this was so interesting to write cause this is SOOOO OUT OF MY COMFORT ZONE AND LIKE?? idk it was a nice experience i hope you like itfkendn
also you know the drill THIS IS NOT OKAY NOR IS IT HEALTHY DONâT DO THIS IRL BITCHES CONSENT IS KEY YALLđđđdo not give tea to someone who doesnât want tea CAUSE THEY DONâT WANT ITT ITâS SIMPLE
god, finally.
you sat on the corner of your mattress, still carefully drying your wet dripping hair with the fluffy towel that belonged to you. after a shower like that? you felt refreshed, you felt good and oh did you feel so ready to just pass out on your bed at that moment. that was until you remembered that you couldnât; since you had to wait for wonyoung, your dorm mate, to come back from the mall with yujinâ or, wherever the hell they were at this hour. her dumbass forgot to bring the keys with her, so youâd have to stay awake to be able to open the door for her.
grabbing your phone, you checked the time. it read 12:37 am, which then lead you to text her, very politely yelling at her through SMS to hurry the fuck home before turning it off again and plugging in the charger.Â
what a hassle, you thought, groaning. you were fucking exhausted and were practically dying to get some amount of rest, especially after such a long day of non-ending schedules.
mentally sucking it up and shrugging it off, you put the towel aside and laid down on your back, grabbing your phone yet again as an attempt to cure the ongrowing boredom and impatience inside you; maybe instagram reels would make the time go by faster.
indeed, before you knew it, you were startled by a quiet knock at the door. feeling immediate relief, you quickly got up and rushed to open it, already thinking about the amazing night of sleep you were gonna get afterwards.
âany second later and i wouldâve left you outside, wonyoung.â you complained as soon as you turned the knob, immediately greeted by her face. you particularly noticed her expression switch to one of slight guilt as she giggled nervously.
you also observed how she stared at you, as per usual.
âsorry, angel.â she apologized, looking up and down at your entire body, seemingly distraught by the sight of your naked thighs, before walking in and continuing. âwe just got so caught up in conversation that we ended up just walking around for hours, i hope i didnât keep you waiting for too long, though.â she scratched the back of her neck, still staring at you, this time more so focused on your chest.
hereâs the thing, you loved wonyoung. she was one of your closest friends, that was undeniable. but for some reason, sometimes whenever youâd talk to her.. sheâd have a certain look. the same look that sheâd give you whenever youâre wearing a somewhat revealing outfit, or doing quite literally anything, for that matter. it always made you feel uneasy, it made your skin crawl. youâd never tell her, though; she was a sweetheart, and you knew that her last intention would be to ever make you uncomfortable.Â
right now was one of those moments, though, and her staring was getting overwhelming.
more overwhelming than usual.
subtly trying to brush it off, you responded, âitâsâ itâs fine. just, please bring the keys next time?âÂ
she simply nodded before apologizing again, clearly aware of her mistake and swearing to never commit it again. that gave you the permission you needed to finally get ready for bed. whilst you were doing that, she was changing into her comfier clothes and also getting ready to sleep as she threw occasional warm smiles at you.Â
until she squinted at you.
âman, you look pretty tired, y/n. did you sleep early yesterday?â she asked with a worried tone, afraid that you maybe werenât getting enough sleep.Â
you waved your hand around, âyeah, i did. today just wore me the fuck out really, but oh well.â you cut the conversation short, heading straight towards your bed. âgoodnight wonyoungââ but before you could do so, you felt her hand grab your wrist.
tightly.
âwait butâ donât you wanna cuddle like we usually do?â she asked, her mouth formed into a small pout.
and there went that stare. again.
âwony iâm sorry, iâm really tired andââ
âcome on, please. i missed you.â she insisted, her grip on your wrist getting tighter as she kept her unsettling gaze on yours.Â
your tired brain didnât seem to register that, however, since you didn't even think about saying no.
i mean, she seemed pretty insistent on cuddling that night, so who were you to even say no? either way, you were gonna fall asleep immediately, so did it really matter if she was cuddling you or not?
you groaned dramatically, then signaled for her to lay on the other side of the bed. her eyes immediately lighting up, she rushed to jump on that side of the bed.
it didnât take long at all for you guys to finally be settled in bed and you particularly thrived in finally feeling the warmth of your weighted blanket against your cold skin. she, on the other hand, just seemed to be happy to be there with you, considering the grip she had on you was quite strong for like, literally no reason.Â
after telling each other goodnight, you expected to doze off immediately, but you couldnât. you felt bizarre, you didnât feel like yourself at that moment. every single ounce of exhaustion left your body and it was like insomnia just kicked in for no reason whatsoever.
frustrated, you tried to sleep. thatâs when you heard her breathing heavily⊠very heavily. her inhales and exhales were loud and violent and you felt them on your neck, since she was especially close to it. you wouldâve shrugged it off,Â
if you didnât feel her hands moving a lot more than usual.
âwonyoung?â
you felt her shift before hearing her hum, indicating you to keep going.
âyou feeling okay?? youâre.. youâre breathing quite heavily.â was what you asked, somewhat concerned. âplus, youâre like, grabbing meââÂ
âsorry.â she responded immediately, âyou justâ you smell good, is all. i saw your hair was wet, you took a shower, right? you used the body lotion i gave you, right?âÂ
you nodded reluctantly, somewhat weirded out by her behavior tonight, to which she hummed again.
âi knew youâd like it, itâs so soft and sweet,â she leaned in closer to your neck, sniffing it closer, âjust like you, angel.âÂ
what the fuck was actually wrong with her that night??
getting even more weirded out with each second that passed, you were about to let out a hesitant âthanksâ but got cut off by the sensation of her slowly sliding her hand up your pajama shirt as she kept sniffing you.
woah.
woah woah woah???
âwonyoungâ what the fuckââÂ
âyou smell so fucking good baby. fuckâ so good. you used that body lotion just so i would notice, hm? i know you did.â she whispered into your ear, smelling your hair in the process as her other hand went down to your crotch.
triggering your fight or flight, you tried pushing her off of you slightly, but she simply wouldnât budge.Â
wonyoung had always been taller than you by a long shot.
your own breathing getting heavier, you were starting to get progressively worried. why was she keeping you in place, why was she smelling you like this?? why the fuck was she acting weird???Â
âwonyoung get off of meââÂ
âgod your smell.âÂ
she just kept mumbling that same sentence as she sniffed you all over, gently putting her hand on your neck to keep you secure, making you squirm under her whilst youâre trying to break free from her tight grasp.
in a state of panic, âyouâre scaring me wony stop it pleaseââÂ
âstop moving or i swear to god iâll fucking kill you.â was all she said back, it was dark, but not dark enough to where you couldnât see her staring at you with that look again. you were shaking by this point, but you obeyed. you stopped moving, in fear of what she was actually going to do to you.
âlook at you, being a fucking slut and putting on the body lotion i gave you, always wearing these outfits around me, and you seriously expect me not to do this shit? god, you probably sounded so good washing up tooââ she rubbed your inners thighs with her free hand before adding on,Â
âwhat do you want me to do when your ass is out in front of me all the time, y/n? i tried to be nice and do it only when youâre sleeping, but answering the door at midnight in booty shorts and tshirt this tight? baby, youâre asking me to fuck you.â her hand still reaching down to your thighs and squeezing them, hard enough for her acrylic nails to dig in slightly as you winced in pain.
you tried speaking up, but words wouldnât come out.Â
you could only stare at her, tears quickly welling up your eyes.Â
âoh angel, donât cry..â she pouted, quickly taking that same hand she used to hurt you and wiping your tears with it. you could only flinch âiâm so sorry baby, iâ i just canât help it. you look so good and smell so good andââ she slid her hand up your shirt and quickly went under your bra, playing with the nipple for a few moments almost immediately as she breathed in more of your pheromones before exhaling sharply yet again. âfuck y/n your titsââÂ
ââiâll be quick, okay? i promise itâll be fine, iâll be sooo quick.â
wonyoung very quickly slid her hand back down your crotch as she forcefully kissed you, tightening her grip on your neck whenever you werenât giving her enough tongue. âcome on baby, work for it, i know you want this.âÂ
you didnât. you didnât want it.
her fingers slipping under your shorts and onto your panties, she rubbed circles around your wet clit through the fabric of them, closing her eyes in euphoria when she heard your choked up moan.
âshit.. look at you, being all wet for me. i knew youâve always wanted me to do this to you. hm? come on, say it.âÂ
âl-let go off meââÂ
her nails dug into your neck once more, making you whimper. âshut. the fuck. up.â she whispered, âi guess bitches like you shouldnât be allowed to speak up, huh. thatâs fine, weâll have you be a stupid puppy instead, okay? you can do that, right?âÂ
you only cried out in front of her, clit still being stimulated from her long and cold fingers. her disturbing gaze piercing through yours, her pretty face exhibiting the ugliest thoughts she had about you.Â
âi said, nod, bitch.â
and so, you nodded. eagerly, at that. of course you did, with the amount of strength this girl was putting on her grip, you needed to obey her every word.
even if you had abundant tears rolling down your face.
âyouâre so pretty like this.â she breathed out, before kissing you then pulling back away, âyouâre getting me so fucking wet y/n.âÂ
then, she gradually reaches into your underwear and puts her hands on your naked cunt, rubbing the slit and feeling how wet it is. in response to that, she laughed.Â
she laughed in your face.
but before you could even process anything, however, she already had two of her fingers buried deep inside your pussy, already curling in all of the right places.
and thatâs when you remembered the fact that she had acrylic nails on.Â
âw-wonyoungâ take them out take them out it h-hurts wonyoung it hurts p-pleaseââ
âi donât give a shit. youâre gonna be a good fucking girl and take it. you know whatâll happen if you donât, donât you?â
she pumped and curled her fingers in and out, watching you as your facial expressions changed with each movement she made, smiling and mocking you.
and that went for what felt like hours.Â
until she decided she had enough of you crying and begging for her to stop. she believed that it was, in her words, âher turn to feel goodâ now.
so she took off her own clothes and rubbed her dripping pussy onto your own, her hand digging into your neck if you moved in a way she didnât like.Â
her words rang in your head, things like ây-youâre so fucking selfish y/n, itâs usually so much better, whenever youâre sound a-asleep peacefullyâ oh my god.â
it didnât take long for her to cum, since seeing you sob so prettily made her so unbelievably aroused. and when she did, she just went back to cuddling you. as if you werenât bleeding from your nose, thighs and neck. as if you werenât in pain, she just went back to cuddling you.
and you just had to silently cry in her arms. those were the only ones you could do that in at that moment.
#smut#kpop gg#female reader#ive smut#jang wonyoung x y/n#jang wonyoung#jang wonyoung x female reader#jang wonyoung ive#jang wonyoung smut#ive jang wonyoung#smut ive#wonyoung ive smut#wonyoung ive#wonyoung#ive wonyoung#wonyoung smut#wonyoung x female reader
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Five plus One, fic recs
A post is going around about fics you consider classics in the Snowbaz fandom. Iâd like to take it a step further by asking âŠ
What are five fics you consider your inspiration/influences for writing, plus one of your fics which you think best represents what you want to bring to the fandom?
5. Hang the Moon by @captain-aralias
@captain-aralias is, to me, the snowbaz fandom fic writer of our time. Her commitment to detail, to nailing Rainbowâs voice, while infusing every fic with a heart and purpose that will leave you changed. Every fic of hers is chefâs-kiss-perfection but Iâm highlighting Hang the Moon specifically as a fic I often think about (Baz, wet tennis clothes, helping Simon fight the merwolves), and a fic that was my introduction to what fanfics could be/do. I think I finished this fic and just stared at the wall for an hour because I was just like, oh. Oh.
4. The Pitch by basic-bathsheba
Local Hero is one of my favorite fanfics but I wanted to highlight this fic because itâs just such a powerful and understated story. Itâs love in the details. This Simon is the model for all of my Simonâs, just a complete simp for Baz haha but also a man who is comfortable and confident being the man who loves Baz even if he doesnât get to claim it publicly.
3. Stay Up With Me by @sharkmartini
Not sure what to say about this that hasnât been said a million times. Itâll break your heart; itâll put you back together. The concept is brilliant and the exploration of two Simonâs will definitely put your emotions through a wringer. Time travel/what-if fics will always grab my attention but this one in particular makes the same case Rainbow posed in Carry On: what if the villain isnât the villain? And takes it a step further, because Simon realizes he could be the villain, too. Absolutely beautiful.
2. Canât Find My Way Home by @carryonsimoncarryonbaz
This is one of those fics that just has so much heart and sweetness. I love a good second chance AU, and this one has such Hallmark vibes in the best way. I just love the slow burn of it, and the amazing ending. A perfect holiday fic to snuggle up with. Reading this feels like being cozy up by the fire with someone you love. Actually writing this makes me wanna reread this so much; now that I live with actual Fall I wanna feel cozy like this again.
1. Basil Pitchâs Diary by @bookish-bogwitch
I know itâs a bit weird to rec a WIP as an influence, especially one thatâs being written as we speak, but working with/beta-ing Emâs works have made me a sharper, smarter writer. I know this fic is a classic in the works and itâs something I think about on a weekly basis. The Baz Em gives us, to me, feels like canon Baz taken to the next level. What if Baz was the villain ⊠but only to himself? Emâs writing really is just economical in the best way; every line hits, every paragraph teaches me something. And then the heart. Itâs genuinely so hard to do what she does and Iâm so lucky to get to see her work in realtime.
+1 This Will All Go Down In Flames
I think, at the end of my fandom career, I want this to be the snowbaz fic people associate with me (Spadey being a close second hahaha). But I do feel like itâs got a lot of fandom in-jokes, humor, and sweetness, plus the fun high-stakes of them being in the spotlight. I got to celebrate the Austin I love and miss, as well as poke fun at my own hipster upbringing. I put a lot of Meâą in this fic and it always feels so lovely when people like it. Besides, I got to work with the amazing @tea-brigade and their art just takes this fic to the next level. A dream collab.
(Throwing in the caveat that I started reading long before I got an ao3 account so itâs very likely Iâve missed some amazing fics from before 2021; Iâm so sorry!)
Tagging everyone listed above and six more peeps to start: @cutestkilla, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @larkral, @ileadacharmedlife, @thewholelemon & @aristocratic-otter
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it's sweet (explicit)
genre: a fluffy lil sickfic
pairing: taehyung x reader
summary: you forgot to call out sick from your dick appointment, but he stays anyway.
word count:Â 4.3k
contains: no smut just fluff????? new year new me đ but as this is fuckbuddies to maybe-lovers and there are certainly a few references in here to sex, because of who i am as a person, it's enough that i'm tagging it explicit anyway lmao. but this is all fluff! reader has the flu, tae is a sweet sweet boi and takes care of her, it's all a bit sappy~ đ€§
A/N:Â happy new year!!! and a very happy belated birthday to my capricorn prince đ this soft little idea got stuck in my brain and wouldn't let go, and i had a lot more fun writing it than expected. plus i feel like i only wrote tae as a menace in 2022 (sorry to tae đč) so i had to right my wrongs with this one lmao. it was a nice interlude before i jump into LDOMLT ch11 (the final chapter đ) - i hope you all enjoy and that your 2023s are off to a pleasant start!!!
read on AO3!
~*~
You genuinely enjoy being single.
With your last relationship officially in the trash, youâve found yourself settled into a comfortable peace. Thereâs no man in your life to mess up your plans, to force you to have to compromise or share anything, to suck up your energy and domestic labor like some kind of emotional vampire. You can do what you want, whenever you want, and you have a reliable rotation of both sex toys and fuckbuddies to keep you physically satisfied when the need arises.
Being single, you have come to learn, is fucking great.
Except when you get sick.
A knock at your apartment door drags you out of your DayQuil-induced slumber. You move to sit up with a sniffle before letting yourself drop back into your veritable nest of blankets on the couch, struck with the immediate recollection: itâs just the food you ordered. Youâd specifically put in a request that they leave it at the door, but maybe the delivery person is just being nice and letting you know itâs there.
Except then they knock again.
And ring the doorbell.
âJesus,â you groan to yourself, aggressively enough that youâre nearly sent into a fresh coughing fit, but you manage to choke down the spasm in your lungs as you drag yourself to standing. You cross the short distance from your couch to the front door, sure you look like death warmed over, and swing the door open.
At first, youâre certain itâs the DayQuil fucking with you.
âTaehyung?â
The corner of his mouth pulls up as he blinks sweetly at you, expressive almond eyes peeking out beneath untidy dark hairâ extra fluffy today, like heâs just washed it and waltzed out of the house without any styling. His clothes tell the same story, a plain gray hoodie and joggers, creased a little like heâd just pulled them off his bedroom floor, though everything looks fresh off the runway on him.
As your eyes trail down his frame, you take in the container of ramen you ordered, held easily in one of his large hands, his long fingers hooking over the side.
His presence is typically a welcome one, particularly on Friday nights like tonight, but those are circumstances where you tend to be a little more⊠put together. So why is he here tonight?
âWhen did you start working for Dââ
The food delivery service name dies on your tongue as your thoughts finally catch up with your mouth. Heâs here tonight because itâs Friday, and this is what you do on Fridays. Heâs here because you didnât cancel. Youâd had the thought in a drowsy half-awake state between naps, then had promptly rolled over and pressed your face into the pillow, telling yourself youâd remember to text Taehyung when you woke up.
Which of course, you did not. And so here he is, having clearly intercepted your delivery. And, it now occurs to you, having to witness how absolutely godawful you must look in your stained sweatpants, your hair surely a mess from a day spent napping on the couch.
âOh fuck,â you mutter, quickly crossing your arms over your baggy t-shirt, suddenly very aware of the fact that youâre not wearing a bra. Why that matters when youâre standing in front of a man who regularly leaves hickeys all over your tits, youâre not sure, but in this moment it somehow feels like it does.
âTae,â you take a step back, trying to keep him out of your germ radius. âIâm so sorry, I forgot to text you. Iâm super sick, I think itâs the flu. You should go.â
He frowns a little, his eyes jumping from you down to the takeout container in his hands. âThis is like, barely warm.â
That makes you smile a little despite yourself. A very Taehyung greeting.
âYeah, well.â You roll your eyes. âI pay twice as much so it can take an hour and be cold by the time it gets here. Makes sense, right?â
His dazzling smile at your sarcastic remark only heightens your own self-consciousness, and you quickly extend a hand for the container.
âSorry to make you come all this way. Hopefully next week Iâll be back to normal.â
Taehyung nods, yet makes no move to hand over the soup heâs currently holding hostage. âYou should rest. Let me heat it up for you.â
You canât help but wonder what he expects to happen when he crosses the threshold, and that makes you heave a sigh, then quickly bury the cough that chases after it into the crook of your elbow.
Thankfully your voice doesnât give out when you manage to answer him. âIâm serious, Tae. Iâm notââ you pause, considering how to phrase it: desperate to be railed? ââyou know, the way I usually am on Fridays. Nothingâs gonna happen tonight. Except maybe youâll get sick.â
He shrugs, like there are worse things. âI get it. But you shouldnât be alone.â
At least heâs been sufficiently warned, you think to yourself, and then you relent, leaving the front door of your apartment swung wide as you step back across the living room to promptly collapse onto the couch again. You bury your face in the blankets with a muffled groan as you hear Taehyung shut the door behind him, then make his way into the kitchen.
As is typical with any man that enters your kitchen, you expect to have to walk Taehyung step-by-step through how to do everything. But, to your surprise, he asks no questions: he seems to find a good-sized pot and figure out how to work the stove all on his own, and you can hear him humming softly to himself as he goes.
Truly a credit to the male species, you think to yourself with a bitter laugh.
You collapse back against the cushions, a little too aware of the fuckbuddy in your kitchen to be able to drift off to sleep entirely. Nevertheless, you still find yourself slipping into a haze, your eyes dropping shut just to snap open again at the tap of a bowl being set down on the coffee table in front of you.
Your eyes widen as you sit up and stare down at your ramen, only to find two halves of a soft-boiled egg staring back up at you. Youâd ordered from your favorite place in the city, which is easily the best ramen youâve had in your life, but you know those fuckers charge extra for an egg. Which is why your cheap ass never orders one.
But here one is. So that meansâŠ
Taehyung drops down onto the couch next to you before you can even finish compiling the thought in your brain, but he must be able to read the look on your face. âOh, do you not like eggs?â
âIâ no,â you answer quickly. âI mean yes. I mean, I like them, I just⊠Thank you.â
You glance up in time to see him shrug, his mouth twisting a little, like heâs suddenly made shy by his own kindness. âGotta get your protein in,â he offers casually, and you laugh over the steam rising up from your bowl.
He keeps a tentative cushionâs distance away from you, but you can feel his eyes watching as you take your first sip of the rich, warm broth. While you slurp it down, you tell yourself not to get greedy with Taehyungâs time: you expect this will be it, that with his act of kindness done for the day, heâll get to his feet and be on his way. As soon as your front door slams shut behind him, heâll probably be pulling up his text messages with one of the many other options that must be available to him.
You try to ignore the way that thought makes your stomach twist, to just eat your damn soup and not think about it. Itâs fine. It doesnât matter.
But to your surprise, Taehyung leans forward and snatches the TV remote off your coffee table with a triumphant sigh before slumping back against the couch, like heâs settling in. âDo you wanna watch something?â
You shake your head as you take another sip before answering. âYou really donât have to stay, Tae. I can appreciate that Iâm not a lot of fun to be around tonight. And obviously you didnât come here to watch me eat ramen.â
Already starting to scroll through your streaming services, Taehyung runs his free hand through his hair with a knowing, slightly horny smile. âDepends on what you mean by eat ramen.â
You nearly choke on a noodle, but heâs otherwise distracted, mouth dropping open a little as he clicks into one of the options.
âOh, I know what we can watch.â
When he pulls up A Charlie Brown Christmas and promptly presses play, you canât help smirking. âChristmas? Youâre, what, five days late?â
Taehyungâs mouth opens again, like heâs going to say something, and then he just smiles that same self-conscious smile. âAh, I just like the music.â
His long fingers splay out in front of him, miming along to the opening melody while he adopts the faux-cool expression of a jazz pianist. You hide a giggle in another sip of broth, and he quickly shrugs the impression off, crossing his arms over his chest as if to keep his limbs under control.
âAnd itâs cute,â he adds, voice halfway between shy and sentimental. âThe little tree.â
It occurs to you now that youâve never seen Taehyung so⊠your brain canât find the right word. Heâs just different tonight.
You nod as you slurp up a strand of noodles, and you canât deny that heâs right as the movie plays on. Itâs been years since youâve seen it, not since you were a kid, but itâs just as enjoyable now, somehow timeless. You find yourself smiling softly as you finish your meal and settle back against the couch, tugging the blanket up to your chin.
All at once, Taehyung jumps up, and you watch dumbfounded as he silently scoops up your dishes and disappears off to the kitchen. When you hear the tap switch on, your jaw drops in sheer disbelief, and you sit up again, peeking over the back of the couch to get a glimpse of him: heâs pulled on the dishwashing gloves you keep tucked next to the sink and is making short work of not just the bowl and the pot, but the takeout container too, and your various other sick-person dishes youâd regrettably let pile up. Humming to himself along with Vince Guaraldi, like itâs something he does every day.
Your head spins as you drop back down against the cushion. What is happening? Did you take too much cold medicine?
That thought only reverberates louder in your brain when he returns, still humming the last few notes of the song. This time he chooses to settle in right beside you on the couch, as if entirely unconcerned about the contagious virus running rampant in your bodyâ he just pulls you into his side, one arm wrapped over your shoulders, fingertips casually starting to play with the ends of your hair. Like itâs that easy.
You glance up at him, shaking your head a little, and Taehyung looks down to meet your gaze. âWhat?â
âThis is justâŠâ An incredulous laugh cuts off the end of your sentence. Itâs hard to believe youâre looking at the same person. This canât be the man who wraps his hand around your throat as he spits into your mouth, who will keep you in his bed for hours until youâre crying from overstimulation, who fucks you so good you can hardly walk the next day.
âI didnât expect you to be like this,â you admit, pairing the words with a finger driven gently into Taehyungâs ribs. He squirms a little. âYouâre⊠sweet.â
Taehyungâs lips part, and then he pauses, clearly considering how exactly to answer you. His mouth turns up soft at the corners, hesitant, as if heâs embarrassed to say what comes next. And then he says it. âYou didnât seem like you wanted sweet.â
The words settle over you, offered quietly in the low, rich tones of his voice, and as you keep gazing up at him, it strikes you: heâs not wrong. If heâd pulled this cozy domestic housewife act on you any earlier, on a normal Friday, you wouldâve sent him packing without hesitation.
That thought makes you a little sad.
You tuck back in against Taehyungâs side, trying to refocus on the TV screen as you snuggle in under the blanket. Pressed close like this, you can feel the sturdy thud of his heartbeat in his chest, at a rhythm not dissimilar to yours.
âWell, I wonât tell anyone,â you breathe, and you swear you can hear him smile.
His touch lingers as the last few minutes of the movie play on: slipping from the ends of your hair to trace over the fabric of your shirt, then sliding further up to dip beneath the collar of it. The talented fingers youâve become well-acquainted with work their magic in a new way, pressing firm circles into the muscles of your shoulders, muscles you didnât realize were pinched so tight until he starts to work them open.
âFuck,â you murmur, shifting a little to allow him better access as he continues. âThat feels so good.â You canât quite help the laugh that flutters out after your words; itâs certainly not the first time heâs made you say them.
Thereâs a small huff of breath from Taehyung beside you, and then his hand moves up to cup the back of your neck and give a gentle squeeze. Itâs a comforting motion, and just arousing enough to make you sigh a note, your eyes briefly dropping shut. When they flutter open again, you realize the movie has ended, that heâs looking down at you, a knowing smirk toying at his lips.
âDonât start,â you warn, unable to keep your voice entirely serious. âI meant what I said, Iâm tapped out for the night.â
Taehyung raises his palms in the air, as if to claim his innocence, and you find yourself instantly missing the heat of his hand on your skin. âAll I was thinking is that I kinda want dessert. Too tapped out for that?â
âIâll never say no to dessert,â you admit with a soft smile. âI think I have ice cream in the freezer.â
Something glints in Taehyungâs eyes at your words. All at once he untangles himself from you and, rather than standing up and walking the long way around like a normal human, chooses instead to vault himself over the back of the couch, as if to get your freezer as fast as possible. You tip back against the cushions, momentarily overcome with laughter, and thankfully, it doesnât trigger a cough attack.
After a second, you cocoon the blanket around yourself, then get up to follow after him, dropping unceremoniously down onto one of the barstools tucked on the far side of your kitchen island.
Taehyung glances up, clearly surprised, then continues trying drawers until he finds the silverware and retrieves two spoons.
âJust want to keep you company,â you say by way of explanation as he hands you one, and you reach down to pry off the lid of the pint of chocolate ice cream heâs set down on the counter. Itâs only as you glance up again that you realize heâs grabbed something else, too, and is continuing to rummage through your cupboards. âWait, what are you doing?â
Thereâs an innocent look on Taehyungâs face as he rights himself, the handle of a pan clutched in one hand. âI found something when I was looking for the ice cream. Itâs my favorite. And I thought it might make you feel better, too.â
âUh huh,â you intone, though your mouth is already starting to tick up, endeared. âA completely selfless act, Iâm sure.â
âOf course it is,â he answers with an over-exaggerated wink, flipping the pan cooly in his grip. You squint at the bag as he thuds it down on the counter beside him, then sets the pan on the stove and flips on the burner beneath it.
Hotteok. Youâd completely forgotten youâd even picked the bag of frozen sweet pancakes up a few weeks ago, that you had purposefully tucked them into the back of your fridge for a particularly goodâ or badâ day.
âChef Kim,â you ask, feigning the tone of a journalist conducting an important interview as you fish your phone out of the pocket of your sweatpants. âCan I interest you in some background music, or do you prefer to cook in absolute silence?â
Taehyung glances back over his shoulder at you, his grin nearly too big for his face. âHow about Sinatra?â
You raise one eyebrow at the admittedly unexpected suggestion. âFrank or Nancy?â
He pauses for a moment, as if considering. âEither.â
Itâs only a few taps, and then Come Fly With Me is floating out of your Bluetooth speaker, and Taehyung is singing along to himself as he drops a frozen disc onto the heated pan, occasionally turning back to deliver lines to you with an extended hand.
You roll your eyes as you drag your spoon through the top layer of softening ice cream, sucking it into your mouth in an attempt to hide the grin thatâs spread over your face.
By the third song you find yourself humming along too, trying not to put too much strain on your still-weak throat. The kitchen has started to smell of sweet, toasted dough as Taehyung works diligently at the stove, and he finally flips the burner off before turning back to you, a plate in each hand and a thick pancake stacked atop each plate.
âSous chef, will you please apply the ice cream?â he asks, eyes wide and blinking as he sets the dishes down.
Quickly playing along, you nod as you begin to scoop a healthy amount onto each plate. âYes, chef!â
âAnd sous chef, do you, uh⊠have any chocolate sauce?â
You bite back a laugh as his roleplay falls apart as quickly as it began. âItâs in the fridge.â
Taehyung promptly turns and pulls the door open, eyes searching the shelves before he finally spots the dark brown bottle and lets out a triumphant hum. He nudges the fridge shut again with his hip before striding back toward you.
âPlating is key,â he muses. You answer with an appreciative nod and a giggle when he uncaps the sauce, then leans down close to the plates, feigning intense focus as he drizzles each dollop of ice cream with stripes of chocolate.
Once his artful design is complete, he steps back, his tongue toying at the corner of his mouth as he spins one plate to admire his handiwork.
âWhat do you think, chef?â you tease, and he nods once, decisive.
âItâs perfect.â He glances up, shooting you a grin that knocks the breath from your lungs, and you try to collect yourself as he nudges a plate toward you, encouraging you to take a bite.
You carve your spoon through the pastry, right down the middle where itâs stuffed full of sweet brown sugar syrup. The flaky layers pull apart at the impact, warm enough that you can see steam rising off of the golden dough. You pair a small piece of pancake with a wedge of ice cream on your spoon, then bring both into your mouth at once, and the contrasting mixtures linger on your tongue: hot and cold, sticky sugar chased by rich chocolate. Itâs so good that you canât help but make a soft, appreciative noise as you press your hand to your mouth and chew.
âDo you want to know something?â Taehyungâs voice pulls your attention back, and you look up at him.
âWhat?â
âTodayâs my birthday.â
Thereâs a split second where you wonder if this is another imagined scenario, and then your eyes widen as you take in the look on his face and realize heâs entirely serious.
âWait, Taehyung, really?â
He nods once, bringing a spoonful of ice cream to his lips.
âI-I had no idea,â you stammer, suddenly feeling like an asshole. His birthday, and heâs here waiting on you hand and foot, while you havenât so much as said a word of felicitations. âOh my god, Iâm so sorry.â
As soon as the words leave your mouth, heâs waving away your apology with his spoon, then proceeding to answer around his bite of food. âItâs not like I expected you to know. I donât really make a big deal of it.â He shrugs. âI tend to⊠I don't know. I get sort of melancholy this time of year. The holidays, my birthday. Itâs a lot all at once. A lot of pressure. To be happy. To have everything figured out.â
Nodding slowly, you let his words fully wash over you before you respond. âI get that,â you finally murmur, working off another piece of hotteok. âNobody ever talks about it, but I feel like birthdays are kinda weird as an adult. You have enough of them and it just starts to feel like a day, you know? Not special.â
âI usually find myself just hiding out, waiting for it to be over,â Taehyung admits.
You take a second to think back. âYeah. I didnât even do anything on my birthday this year.â A self-pitying laugh rises up before you can stop it. âHonestly, this whole year was such a flop. Iâm glad itâs nearly done.â
Taehyung makes a face like he canât disagree. âHey, sometimes thatâs life.â He pauses, brow furrowing slightly, then reaches a palm across the table. âCan I play a song?â
âGo ahead,â you offer, pushing your phone into his hand. You scrape your spoon along your dwindling dessert, and havenât even managed to bring the assembled bite to your mouth before the music changesâ from one Frank Sinatra song to another, this one with a driving blues rhythm.
Taehyung is already on his feet, hips starting to sway. âAh, come on. You have to dance with me.â
Heâs closed the distance between you before you can even protest, his hands smoothing across the blanket still wrapped over your shoulders.
âLet me take your coat, maâam.â
You shift off the stool and onto your feet with a smile as he unwraps the blanket from around you and tosses it toward the back of the couch, missing by at least a foot.
âWhy thank you,â you tease, feigning some kind of Transatlantic lilt to your voice that makes him really laugh. âSuch a gentleman.â
Taehyung turns to face you again, and then you feel his large hand pressing to the small of your back, warm even through the fabric of your shirt, and your heart stutters a little. You take his other hand in yours and let him lead, let him pull you all the way in until you can turn your head and press your cheek to the firm plane of his chest.
Frank Sinatra croons on about how you canât let life get you down, and suddenly thereâs a weight settling in the pit of your stomach.
âI feel bad, Taehyung,â you admit, and when you glance up at him, heâs looking right back down at you. âThat youâre here with me tonight.â
âWhy?â he asks, like he really doesnât know.
âBecause,â you shake your head. âI donât know. Thereâs a million better places you could be. I canât even give you birthday sex.â
âI wouldnât have stayed if I didnât want to,â he answers simply, then leans back, guiding you under his arm for a spin.
A little giggle bubbles up in your chest, catches on the first syllable of your reply as you twirl. âA-are you sure?â
Taehyung nods, thoughtful, when you come back to center again. âThis is a good reminder that⊠I like taking care of people. Itâs been a while since anyoneâs let me.â The hand holding yours gives a gentle squeeze, and you canât help but squeeze back.
âWell, thank you for taking care of me,â you answer softly. âYou did a good job. Pretty sure Iâm on the mend already.â You blink up at him through your lashes, and the way his eyes are fixed on you makes your heart squeeze, too.
Itâs nearly overwhelming, taking him in like this, close enough that you can see every stray beauty mark kissed over his handsome features. Fluffy-haired, big-dicked Kim Taehyungâ who wouldâve thought?
Taehyungâs adamâs apple jerks in his throat as he swallows, and you feel a sudden rush of heat all over, one you donât quite think you can blame on a fever. It hardly even occurs to you that the two of you have come to a complete standstill now, barefoot in the middle of your kitchen, Taehyungâs palm pressed to your back, the fingers of your joined hands now shifting to lace together.
âTaehyung,â youâre breathing his name before you even realize it. âWould you⊠want to stay here tonight? Like, sleep together, literally?â
The smile that flashes over his face is nothing short of brilliant. âYeah, okay.â
Your voice dips a little lower, teasing, as you smile back. âI really do think Iâm feeling better, so. Maybe in the morning I can take care of you, too.â
Taehyungâs fingers brush the length of your jaw, then reach up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear as you continue.
âIâve got this spray that makes my throat totally numb, so.â
He pauses, his mouth so close to yours that you can feel his breath ghosting over your skin, but he canât quite keep a straight face. âFuck, why is that so sexy?â
Youâre laughing against his lips when he kisses you.
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FIREWORKS
Summary: itâs the last day of summer you decide to invite your next door neighbor who you became friends with to come to the beach with you to watch the fireworks⊠the night ended with you doing more than just watching
Bimbo!xreader , non-idol au!xjeonjungkook, dilf!xjeonjungkook
Warning: cum eating , breeding kink , nipple play (reader has nipple piercings too ^_^ ) , ass slapping , p in the v , size kink , hand kink , dirty thoughts , pervert kookie , bratty reader ^^ ,, sex tape , , dom!jk , sub!reader, jealous koobi
â.àłàż*:
â.àłàż*:
it was the last day of summer and it was very hot so you decided to go the beach with your neighbor that you became very good friends with over the month.
You learned so much about him, you found out that he had a son and been struggling lately so you decided why not bring him to the beach with you. You really wanted for his adorable son to come but sadly his mom picked him up earlier before you arrived knocking on jungkookâs door.
âSo you mean to tell my you never tried meant ice cream?â You ask jungkook as yâall both are currently walking to his car to head to the beach.
âNow that I think of it.. I probably have but I bet you it was a long time of ago because I really donât even remember if I like it or notâ you giggle at his response and it makes jungkook smile. Just being around you is a fresh of breath air for jungkook he was going through a lot with his baby mama this morning and genuinely needed to step out of the house today so he is glad that you asked him to tag along with you.
while jungkook is driving to the beach you admire his facial features and how his face is perfectly sculpted and carved as if God took a very good time on perfecting him. You move down to his chest to see he is wearing a black shirt that seems too tight on him because you can see his biceps and chest peeking out of his shirt asking to be revealed already. You feel heat start to flood between your thighs wants you land on his hands.. wondering how they will fill gripping around your throat or inside your cunt. Before you can even get to his legs you hear your name being called.
â[âŠ]?â you hear jungkook say your name in confusion. âHuh? Iâm sorry did you say something? I wasnât paying attention Iâm sorry.â
jungkook laughs he noticed that you was staring at him the whole time, heâs not gonna say anything heâs just gonna give you his infamous little smirk.
âI was saying that we made it the beach.â you finally recollect your thoughts and realize that you guys are finally parked outside of the beach. So this means you been staring at him for the whole ride??? Embarrassing
âOh right! Well letâs go have some fun.â You say trying to enlighten the mood to remove the awkward tension in the car. You hop out with your beach bag and look at your self in your camera to make sure your hair and makeup looks good, your currently wearing a coverup over your swimsuit since you know at night the beach can get cold.
As soon as yâall find yâall seats jungkook is practically tearing off his clothes and jumping into the water. He asked you to join him but your response will always be âI donât wanna get my hair wet.â âIâm reading right nowâ or âmy makeup looks to good for it to be ruined kookie.â
And at all those responses all jungkook did was laugh because he was gonna get you in the water either way.
âCmon [..] just tie your hair up and come in the water with me. You donât even gotta swim for real, itâs the beach you can stand in the water with me.â jungkook is standing over you with his shirt fully off hair wet all over his face and a ray of sun light landing on his chest. He looks so unreal right now. Although your eyes is strained on his body your ears listen to the question he asked you, would it really hurt just to get in the water?? No. I mean I did wear a cute swimsuit why put it to waste when thereâs so cute guys out here today.
âI guess your right kooki. Iâll get in the water with you but I will not swim because I really donât wanna get my hair so please donât splash me neither.â You say as you get up to remove your swimsuit cover up just to reveal a cute swimsuit set underneath.
jungkook feels like a perv for staring and admiring your body⊠but at the same time he also doesnât wanna look away. Your perky boobs are basically spilling from your swimsuit top and he can clearly see that you got hello kitty nipple piercings. He moved down to your legs, the way the sun is hitting them tells him that before yâall got the the beach you oiled up your legs, your swimsuit bottom barely covers up the little hickey on your inner thigh which makes him frown a little. He knows your not his but the thought of another man hands on your body and pleasing you other than him hurts him.
Jungkook continues to stare at you and when you turn over to bend down to apply sun screen to your thighs he can see how perfect your ass is rounded. Itâs so big and the skin looks so soft that he just wants to hold it and grip it until he falls asleep every night. As he continues to stare at your ass he eyes trails down to your Pussy, and as he said last time the swimsuit bottoms seem like they arenât your best friend today he can basically see your pussy. This causes jungkook to move behind you.
Once your done applying sunscreen you feel someone pushing up against your backside. You almost stumbled over and fell on your face in the sun if jungkook didnât wrap his arm around your waist to catch you in time. You blush at the feeling of his bulge rubbing against your ass, is he doing this on purpose???
You turn around quickly and smile at him. âLetâs go into the water. The fireworks are finna start soon and I donât wanna miss themâ
"fuck..[..]" jungkook groans out as your head bobs up and down on his cock. he grabs your cute little pony tail and yanks your head up off of him so he can get a good view of your fucked out face. "you look so cute baby.." "please~ jungkook fuck me." jungkook grins at you begging him to fuck you.
jungkook lays you on your back and puts your legs over his shoulders. before jungkook gives you head he admires your fat pussy,its puffy and leaking arousal just from you giving him head. jungkook finally latches his tongue agaisnt your clit and it feels like your about to explode. your eyes roll all the way back to your head and your brain feels foggy and cloudy you cant even think straight.
"fuck princess your pussy is sweet" jungkook's tongue enters your cunt and he starts fucking you with his tongue. your pussy starts to clench onto his tongue which lets him know your finna cum. he stops and comes up from between your thighs. "what the fuck kookie. i was close to cumming why did you move?" you was confused on why moved espically since you was finna orgasm and now he ruined it and the feeling between your thighs feels itchy for a chance to cum.
jungkook laughs at you. "i didnt want you to cum from my tongue. i wanted you cum on my dick first." he practically yanked your body and postion you to be on all 4's. he gets behind your ass and you feel a sharp pain on your ass indicating that somone just spanked you.
jungkook rubs his dick againts your slit, you whine and wiggle your hips so he can enter your pussy already. he slaps your ass "wait a minute princess" he laughs.
"I-" just as you was about to say something jungkooks slams his hips agaisnt your ass causing you to let out a sharp gasp. "mmngh~ fuckkkk jungkook omg." you start to see stars at this point. jungkook gets an idea and pulls his phone out to go the camera app and hit record. he turns his flash on to get a good view of your ass and pussy.
he puts the phone down so it would get a good look at of where you both connect at. sounds of skin slapping and moans coukd be heard in the car. if anybody walks by and see the car rocking back nd forth they would know action is getting done in this car.
"fuckk~ princess throw that ass back on me" you day as he say and you start fucking him back. jungkook groans and his hands go towards your breast and he flicks your nipples with fingers. you moan out letting him know that your sensetive there. "fuck~mnghh kookie im finna cum..." you scream out to him. jungkook starts going faster,"im finna cum to.fuckkkk~ima cum all in this pussy. wanna have my babies hm?? want your cute ass to walk around my house carrying my child." just his words make you cum. your legs shaked and you fell forward on the seats out of breath.
jungkook slips out of your groaning at the lost of the warmth and comofrt. both of yall bodys jump up at the sound of a loud bang. "what the fuck was that?" jungkook grabs his pants and throws it on him to get out the car to check what happend just to be met with a bunch of fireworks shooting into the sky. he smiles at thought of you since you wanted to see them so bad, "[..}." he calls your name out and you cover yourself up with your swimsuit cover up and go where he standing at. you look up and see a pink fire work shoot up into the sky making you feel all happy inside and glad you didnt miss it.
you felt two pair of arms wrap around your shoulders and you smile up at jungkook. "i forgot to thank you for taking me to the beach, but i am so glad you invited me. this is the most fun i ever had, and also thank you for giving me the best time in the car as well." he gives you a cocky smile. you punch his arm and smile,"shut up. and im glad you came with me. i didnt want to go alone at all and i was hoping mingi would come with.. but its all good i had fun with you today" yall both face each other and stare at each other for a whole 2 minutes untill jungkook grips your face and smashes his lips onto yours.
FIREWORKS pop into the air. mutiple going off letting yall know that those was the final FIREWORKS tonight.
Yall finally pull away from eachother and he says the words that you wish you can hear him say a thousand times. "I love you [..]." he gives you one last peck before yall head home for tonight. "I love you too jungkook."
THE END
â.àłàż*:
â.àłàż*:
â.àłàż*:
#black fem reader#blackyn#đ„ââââ naz hoe thoughts!#bts x black reader#shuri x black!reader#pink y2k#pink moodboard#coquette aesthetic#soft pink#pink blog#jungkook smut#bts smut#fictional idol community#toji smut#jeon jungkoooook#jungkook#jungkook x y/n#jung hoseok#bts x reader#bts fanfic#bts icons#bts fic#taehyung smut#reblog
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Some of my thoughts for your conversation about inaction towards antiBlack/racist behavior in shared online spaces (particularly fandom).
1. "I dont see it / I dont go here" - this was my first thought/defensive reaction and in reading others responses I think its a shared one.
Tumblr is perhaps unique in how purposely you can shape your experience and limit what you interact with. Blocking someone just cause is fully acceptable and expected here.
So, when Ive seen depictions of 'Black' characters that made me go, "Mmm idk man" its been my policy to just block and move on. Less chance of seeing a racist in the tags I like in the future *shrug*
Now on other sites perhaps there is some consideration that could be given to not wanting to boost something racist via interaction...but that's not how Tumblr works. Furthermore your reminder that seeing things go unopposed is the problem hit me like a frying pan to the face. Because...yeah duh.
We know the 'social rules' of this platform, you report/block the porn bots, you dont spam tags for engagement (or report if you see it), add image descriptions, reblog things you like etc. Would it be so hard to leave a simple comment on the things you want to see be changed?
2. "What if I do it wrong/I dont know this fandom/Not my place to speak?" - I firmly believe the main reasons people dont meaningfully engage with posts here or on other platforms is two fold: Responses and Outting.
If you were to post a mild comment saying for example, "Hey, feels kinda weird how you're only talking about this Black character being violent in this show. Why dont you check out this blog post by CBC, a Black artist who really digs into this topic more?"
Now you are expected to 1. 'deal' with whatever that persons response is and 2. Anyone an see and respond to what you said.
I think we generally expect random stranger interactions on the Internet to be unpleasant but, like if we are putting the focus on caring about Black people in out spaces...shits already 'unpleasant' for them.
Its time to start firing fireworks off in our neighborhoods to keep the rents low so to speak. You, non-Black folk (i.e me), dont have to wage endless comment battles with someone who wont listen. Just stating what you are seeing is enough, its marking that post for other people coming along. Forcing the question, "Y'all are we cool with this?"
As for messing up/having a record of things you said someone else might take issue with later on. Yeah but thats already happening whenever you reblog anything.
If you actually spoke out of turn just say, "Im sorry thanks for letting me know" and move on with your life. Otherwise folks on here will actually harass you over your shipping preferences so your rolling those dice already. Why not do it for something better worth it?
3. A Note - Genuinely thank you for posing these thoughtful question and just honestly expressing your frustration/hurt. It helped me think more deeply about some old habits.
Thank you!
Hm. And you're welcome
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i think youâre absolutely right about the cuntboys/make trans guys pregnant shit. it made me so uncomfortable too.
pregnancy has always been a giant fear of mine, and there are people out there who genuinely think forcing trans men to get pregnant will âfixâ us or some shit. like, sure, itâs fine to joke abt stuff that affects you, but that post didnât read all that jokey to me tbh.
and the cuntboy thinf. seriously? thatâs essentially just pushing us- (sorry canât remember the right word for it lol) but itâs just pushing us down to labeling us by what we were born with and differentiating us from cis men
it's just blowing my fucking mind to watch them try to backtrack and claim it was "just joking about kinks between friends" because that is literally not what happened. they were talking specifically about a group of "cuntboys" they don't like, said that they should make those "cuntboys" they don't like "fat and pregnant" and then joked about making them "breeders." if they were joking about a kink between friends, they'd have made a separate post and used language that made it clear they were talking about themselves. they didn't though bc they were literally talking specifically about a group of people they don't like and specifically weaponizing a terrifying and traumatizing experience a lot of trans ppl who can get pregnant never ever want to experience.
and i put this in the tags of my other answer, but like. when roe v wade fell, i waited on the phone for 4 hours with the "women's health clinic", the only clinic in my area that took medicaid, to try to get an appointment to get sterilized and it took another two weeks just to get it confirmed. i remember the guy i was hooking up with texted me the day the news broke and asked if i wanted to stop hooking up because he knew how huge a fear pregnancy is for me. i had been trying to get sterilization surgery for years but kept getting sent away, and finally i had to just tell the doctor i had my appointment with "listen dude i am almost 30 i know what i want if i get pregnant and i can't get an abortion my only option will be to kill myself and i really want to fucking live so please give me this surgery." insurance ended up not even covering a hysterectomy so i had to opt for tubal removal. because even being on hormones and having a clear record of asking over and over again for sterilization wasn't enough to grant me bodily autonomy, i had to give them no other option. i got misgendered the entire time i was at the hospital and don't even remember how i got home because i was barely out of anesthesia and conscious when they loaded me in my sister's car.
a pregnancy is a death sentence for so many trans people. and for those that end up going through it, or even for those who want to go through it, pregnant trans people are treated horrifically. if your kid comes out with birth defects, you can be prosecuted for child endangerment because testosterone can cause birth defects.
you do not fucking make jokes like that about other people. and you do not turn around and tell the people you made rape/forced pregnancy jokes about that they're being too sensitive or that they're somehow making you uncomfortable for calling you out on your disgusting and misogynistic joke. this is not fucking 2016 reddit you do not have to be an edgelord to be accepted as one of the guys. making literal rape jokes is not protecting trans women. it's you being a misogynist. i am not changing my mind on this.
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hi there chris! since the new year is approaching rapidly, i wanted to ask my favorite creators (that includes you! i love your art!) how they look back on their 2023 tumblr year and which blogs made them happy to be here. i am very happy to follow you and hope you'll have a great 2024! đ
Hiiii omg this is so sweet and means a lot to me, thank you! đ„șđ
I've been meaning to do a little end-of-the-year shoutout/love post for some of my favorite blogs, so I hope you don't mind if I use your ask as the perfect excuse!
I've had many fun years on tumblr, but this one has been extra special. Falling into the Good Omens fandom and meeting all of you amazing people has made this year so so SO much better than it otherwise would have been, so here are some special shoutouts (apologies, I'm sure this will get long, things like this tend to get away from me, so I'll put it under a read-more)
@majortomyourcurcuitsdead SASHA can you believe I was going to just send you an anon telling you that I think you're cool and leave it at that. Can you believe it. WELL thank Somebody you had your anon turned off and I had to expose myself in your dms because it feels like we just instantly connected about like 20 different things and haven't stopped talking since sskjdfhs anyway I'm so happy I met you you're so fun and so clever and so talented and so enthusiastic and I've only known you for like. What 2 months?? Ish? But I already love you so much <3
@lineffability !!! Line you are so *struggles to find words* you're just great is what you are okay. I feel like you are what happens when somebody takes a big cup and puts six shots of love, chaos, sunshine, talent, fun, and enthusiasm into it, generously sprinkles intelligence on top and gives it a good stir. I don't even remember how or when or why we started talking tbh? But your creativity is so inspiring, and some of my favorite tumblr-moments of this year have been 'yes-and'ing with you about one thing or another in a very >:3 manner hahah so! my point is! i love you lots <3
@dontbotheraziraphale Teeeedddd you're wonderful, I vented at you one time and then we talked for like 2 hours and at the end of that 1 conversation I already considered you a friend - and not just in that "tumblr mutuals who talk 1 time are my friends" kind of way but like. Genuinely. You're so kind and so fun and every time we talk it's such a good time ily a lot my bro my buddy my man <3
@crikey01 Tallulah HI I also completely forgot how we started talking but I remember connecting the dots that you were the one who painted those INSANE black and white and gold oil paintings and the way my jaw dropped like?? BRO you're so talented I admire you so much! And I love that we bonded over stopping each other from masochistically checking certain peoples' blogs... đ Anyway you're so sweet and fun and ily lots <3
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The list could probably go on but you four are the people I've talked to most on here and you're the tumblr chat boxes I never close but always just minimize and y'all better see this as the ultimate internet declaration of affection that it Clearly is >:D đ
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And here are some more shout-outs because I just HAVE to.
Apologies, I know I've already tagged a bunch of you recently in a mutuals appreciation post but. This is my official thank-you-for-2023 post and I just have a lot of love for you all okay sorry feel free to ignore this <3
@rowan-ashtree (i'll text you back soon I promise I'm sorry I just haven't had the brain-space recently ssjkdfh) @crawley-fell (we've never talked but i love you from afar :')) @ineffabildaddy @llokilaufeyson @actual-changeling @saryasy @hyperfocusthusly @beccibarnes @rainbowcrowley @thesherrinfordfacility @goodoldfashionednightingale @wibbly-wobbly-blog @highlyillogicalandroid (i see your data obsession and i agree <3) @tortugay @foolishlovers @stargazing-crowley @gingiekittycat @weasleywrinkles @bildads-shoes @finleycannotdraw @bowtiepastabitch @heytherefluffy @samwwise @nocturnal-birb @athousandyearstime @angelsdiningattheritz @most-normal-eccles-cake-ignorer @jedthesecretdreamer @wraithee @hydrangeadangea @southfarthing @frodo-baggins @mobius-m-mobius
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Just read your eridan essay. I left a lot of words in the tags (sorry about that btw. I'm @kitkat-not-karkat, those were my tags) and I just. Holy fucking shit man.
THANK YOU FOR PUTTING IT INTO WORDS. Like. Genuinely. Thank you.
That said, do you have any ideas on why Eridan might specifically flirt as a sort of default response sometimes? (I really hope I'm not misremembering that, the fandom bastardizes the poor guy to be Cronus 2.0-)
I have my own personal speculation here, but I'd love to see your take on it!
I think it's a few things all working in tandem, and I think you definitely nailed at least most of it! I do agree that a huge part of his fixation on romance is the fact that a romantic partner is "supposed" to stick around, and Eridan is simply desperate for attention and friendship.
There are a lot of people who idealize relationships and believe that they're the "fix" or "solution" to their emotional problems, and Eridan's obsession with blackrom in particular (where the caligulas part of his trolltag comes from) definitely has shades of that. A kismesistude is an outlet for violent urges, as well as a romantic interest who ideally doesn't ghost you or leave you alone (cough Vriska cough), and one of the two concupiscent quadrants that needs to be filled so you don't get culled.
An interesting thing is constantly being implied within the comic, which is that moirallegiance is actually kind of the most important quadrant for trolls, but their culture has de-emphasized it in favor of the two breeding-related quads. After all, since adult trolls don't have to raise their own young, what Karkat calls "mating fondness" is biologically much less imperative to their species compared to the quadrant that keeps volatile trolls from going berserk and killing people.
Moirallegiance is always treated with a sort of mysticism - it's called "magical" by the narration in relation to Kanaya and Vriska's moirallegiance while that's still extant, it's the only quadrant described as "soul mates," and in contrast to "mating fondness," Karkat mentions the "mystical forces governing moirallegiance." Moirails - Equius and Nepeta being confirmed, but I genuinely believe that that's what Feferi and Sollux would have resolved to in that hypothetical golden ending - are also the quad that spends the most time together, rather than the two concupiscents. The initial description of the pale quadrant even outright says that the attraction is "instinctive." There's something magical and destiny-laden in a moirallegiance that just isn't there to the same extent in the other three quads.
But in Alternian society, kindness, guilt, and the other kinds of things you'd share with a moirail are considered weakness, especially for highbloods. When Feferi is breaking up with him, Eridan flips out the hardest at the implication that she felt the need to take care of him, insisting that he was perfectly fine. I think this is the reason, in addition to the painful breakup, that Eridan never pursues pale relationships, even though a moirail is what he desperately needs. Instead, he pursues the much more societally acceptible pitch quadrant, which can serve a similar purpose of discharging some of his pent-up aggression.
Moreover, his flirting isn't nearly as relentless as people think it is, although he IS both really stubborn AND really socially inept, which makes it difficult both to get a "no" through his brain, AND to make it stick. Another part of it is that he's operating at very little self-awareness, which means he'll often be doing something without consciously realizing it. Also, he's desperate as hell, and has basically no ability to differentiate good and bad attention. This leads to a pretty messy cocktail that basically means:
He'll hit on anyone at least once (desperation), with the exception of people it would be really weird to hit on, for example, their dancestors, who are way older than them.
If a rejection is not made excruciatingly clear, he probably won't register it as a rejection (dumbassery).
Nearly any attention he gets might be misinterpreted as flirting, even after a rejection is made (desperation, also, can't differentiate between good and bad attention).
Even after a rejection is made and he logically understands it and outright says he respects it, he might still act in a flirtatious way unconsciously (zero self awareness).
Because he will hit on anyone at least once, and is constantly making things weird and leaping to "romance?" even when there's no flirtatious intent, people kind of assume he's always hitting on them, even when he isn't.
His emotions always running at a fever pitch, and the lack of self-awareness he cultivates in order to help deal with his horrible cognitive dissonance, mean that even HE'S not sure about his real feelings. He's always feeling SOMETHING very, very intensely (it's the trauma and anxiety), which he mistakes for true caliginous hatred, or fevered flushed intent. Unlike Cronus, who's basically just trying to get some action, Eridan genuinely feels something for people, and his extreme lack of emotional intelligence means he has no idea how to parse his own tempestuous emotions. He always leaps to feverish concupiscent attraction because that's just how intense his emotions run at any given moment.
#4 is happening to Feferi and Sollux, IMO, while Rose never properly rejected him, so he still thinks they have a chance, and the same happened with Vriska when she started ghosting him post-kismesistude. #5 can be seen in his last memo with Karkat, where Karkat starts to wonder if past!Eridan was redflirting with him by inviting him to LOWAA, even as Eridan himself has no idea what the fuck Karkat is talking about.
Thing is, he DOES actually accept rejections once he gets them through his thick skull, which sets him apart from Cronus, who gets rejected, knows it, and keeps going. It's just... Eridan's messy. His emotions are all over the place, and too big for his stupid body, so he's always making things weird and intense.
I blame his lusus, personally. In a previous post, I talk about how a huge factor in his inability to identify negative attention is because he's basically being emotionally neglected. This has also led to his desperation for attention in general. When combined with the trauma from all the murdering and the pressure society puts on him to fit into a certain mold, it leads to some pretty explosive emotional ourbursts, of which his intense, insistent, and downright uncomfortable flirting is a major facet, but also, only a facet.
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No More Running
Day 7 of @steddielovemonthâs Steddie Love Month Event!  Rating: General CW: None Tags: Fluff, Getting Together, Eddie Munson is a Sweetheart, Eddie Munson is a romantic WC: 1,122 Prompt: âLove is what makes you braveâ submitted by @sidekick-hero
Note: Guess who came down with a cold. Me. Guess who ignored their many deadlines to write this. Also me. Sorry if this isnât the best (and is also very late), but Iâm pretty sick and canât breathe out of my nose. I wanted something soft to make me feel better, so I wrote this. Enjoy!
He wasnât going to run anymore. Thatâs what Eddie promised himself when he woke up from surgery after being dragged out of the Upside Down. He wasnât going to run, and he hasnât. He hadnât run from Wayne, he hadnât run from the somehow alive Jim Hopper, he hadnât run away from the aftermath of Vecna, and he wasnât going to run from this.Â
Eddieâs been developing feelings for Steve since he made that promise. Waking up to learn that the Steve Harrington bridal carried his half dead body out of hell really does something to a guy. Not only that, but Steve is one of the sweetest guys Eddie has ever met. Long gone is the King Steve of Hawkins High; replaced by a loving, caring, and smart man.Â
Steve had been there for Eddie through the whole recovery process. He helped with proving that Eddie was innocent, he helped Eddie with bathing, and he helped Eddie with cleaning and wrapping his wounds.
 Steve also helped Eddie with processing the trauma of Spring Break. He held Eddieâs hand and talked him through panic attacks. He stayed awake with Eddie when sleep seemed like a monstrous task; the fear of what heâd dream fraying Eddieâs nerves and keeping him awake.Â
Steve was also just an amazing person overall. He had an amazing sense of humor; making Eddieâs ribs ache with the laughter he tugged out of him. Steve was smart, he could read peopleâs emotions like no other. He knew exactly what Eddie was feeling by looking at him for only a couple of seconds. Steve could pull the real reasons as to why Eddie was quiet out of him when no one else could.
He was easy on the eyes, too. His chestnut hair looked glorious, styled or not. His eyes were kind and genuine; but could turn bitchy in a way that sent heat down Eddieâs spine. Steveâs hands were big and spotted with freckles and moles, like the rest of his body. His skin was sun kissed and hairy. Everything about him made Eddie want to pounce on him.Â
Everything about Steve had made Eddie fall head over heels in love with him. Eddie knew about Steveâs woeful dating history; knew about Steveâs failed loves. How people have used Steve for a quick fling or bragging rights before tossing him to the side.Â
Eddie wanted to give Steve the world. Eddie wanted to worship Steve the way he deserved; to kneel at his feet and kiss up his body, to whisper praises into his ear, to pump Steve full of love and want, and maybe some other things besides love, too. Eddie wanted to make sure Steve knew that he deserved better than those past flings could have ever provided.
Thatâs why Eddie is stood outside of Steveâs font door, holding a bouquet of deep, ruby roses. Eddie had put on a black button up and black jeans. His wallet chain still dangled on his hip, complementing the silver of his rings. He had tied his hair up into a bun, leaving some framing pieces around his face. He spent a while on doing himself up, had wanted to look good for Steve.
He leaned forward and knocked at the door. Steve always teased him about not using the doorbell, but Eddie liked knowing that Steve knew it was him at the door based on his knock alone.Â
Eddie heard shuffling from behind the door before the sounds of the lock being opened filled his ears. His heart picked up its pace, knowing how close Steve was. Eddie sends out one last prayer, despite not believing in any type of greater being, that Steve felt the same way he did. And if he didnât, to at least keep Steve in his life for as long as possible.Â
The door swung open, Steve stood in the doorway in grey sweatpants and a Hall and Oates T-shirt. He looked absolutely gorgeous like this, soft and relaxed. He had obviously been lounging around before Eddie had come knocking on his door.Â
âHey, Eds!â Steve said, a smile stretched across his face. Eddieâs gut filled with warmth. His heart stuttered with the overwhelming love he felt for this man.Â
âHey, Stevie. I hope Iâm not bothering you?â Eddie said. Steve shook his head,
âNah, man. Youâre not bothering me.â Steve looked down,
âWhatâre those for?â Steve looked back up and made eye contact with Eddie.Â
âTheyâre uh, theyâre for you, actually.â Eddie turned his head away. He could feel his face warming up. He held the roses out for Steve to take, hopefully heâd take them.Â
Steve grabbed the bouquet, pulling Eddieâs attention back up. Steveâs own cheeks and ears flushed.Â
âWhy? Is there an event or something that Iâm missing?â Steve sounded shy and a bit nervous. Eddie shook his head and smiled at Steve.Â
âNo, I just wanted to get you flowers. Could I talk to you, actually?â Eddie asked, he shuffled his weight from foot-to-foot as he spoke. He was nervous and scared about confessing his feelings to Steve. He really hoped that this wouldnât destroy their friendship.Â
âSure, yeah, come inside.â Steve said, stepping away to make space for Eddie. Eddie stepped inside and shut the door behind him. He turned to Steve, straightened his back and gathered all of the courage he could muster.Â
âSteve, youâre my best friend. You mean so much to me. Youâre so kind and amazing.â Steveâs blush deepened at Eddieâs words,Â
âYouâre the bravest person Iâve ever met. Youâre strong, not just physically, but in every aspect of the word. You are so observant, you can always tell when Iâm upset. You can read me like a goddamn book,â Steve chuckled and looked down at the roses in his hand, he was never really good with accepting praise.
âYou are my everything, Stevie. And Iâve developed a lot of feelings for you, So, would you like to go out with me?â Eddie finished. Steveâs eyebrows had raised with surprise, his mouth forming an âoâ shape. Steve blinked, then his mouth fell back into a smile. Â
Steve walked up to Eddie, dropping the hand holding his flowers to the side. He placed his free hand onto Eddieâs face. His thumb swiped over Eddieâs cheek before pulling him in.Â
Their lips smooshed together and a fire lit up in Eddieâs chest. Steveâs lips moved against Eddieâs, their lips forming a rhythmic push and pull. After a minute, Steve pulled back. He smiled at Eddie, both their faces still red and warm to the touch.Â
âI would love to go out with you, Eddieâ Steve whispered against Eddieâs lips.Â
Eddieâs so glad he didnât run from this.
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I have a PSA concerning AI
First of all, ai has been scraping voices and using them for monetary gain.
My professor got called by his "son" because he "got arrested for running over a pregnant lady". Concerned, he called the number he was referred to which was a "lawyer" recommending paying for bail. The "lawyer" sent him the location to pay the bail money, which was 2 hours away in the middle of nowhere. There are multiple bail places around our college town, so my professor realized it was very suspicious. He called his wife and sure enough, the son was fine and not arrested.
He's not the only person this has happened to, and people think the voices come from those who respond to scam calls. Although it's fun to mess with scam callers, they can recover your voice and record it to use later in similar schemes.
Please create some sort of riddle or safe word or something in case you are unsure if it's your loved one or not calling. Also, spread the word! Many of my friends have gotten similar calls.
~~~
On another note, I did what you're not supposed to do and asked chat gpt to recreate a fic in the style of my ao3 account.
DISCLAIMER: I have never used AI and never will again. This was for curiosity and educational purposes! All my work is genuine and I do not support chat GPT.
Here are the screenshots:
(some words are cut off a bit, sorry about that! Also, ignore the time and my phone battery XD)
As you can see, ai was able to recreate my common tags, themes, and characters. It was also able to perfectly replicate my punctuation style (way too many commas and wordy descriptions) in a way you wouldn't expect a computer to do.
Those that have read my fics before know and probably recognize sentence patterns, imagery, etc. that are sort of my signature (I guess?), but ai was able to form this fic in just a few seconds.
This is obviously a problem for not only artists and creators, but also for the population as a whole, which is a whole other rant for another day.
I don't know if I'll lock my fics (which I'd hate because I get a lot of involvement from nonmembers), or what I'll do, but I do know that this is startling to know what ai is capable of.
To put things simply, AI is getting to dangerous levels of awareness and control.
#anti ai#psa#public service announcement#spread the word#signal boost#ai#ao3#scary#artists#writers#stephen strange#ironstrange#robots#politics (sort of?)#my analysis#my thoughts#food for thought
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alright guys i got a surprise class cancellation so i can tell yall about the stb dress rehearsal show last night and how it went. this is gonna be a long one grab a drink
no JUICY DEETS if you were expecting that. i am not a leaker and will never be. more like a gushy review than anything
so if you wanna hear about how will wood now knows about my universityâs garfield club, feel free to read.
first of all, i canât actually say much about the content of the show itself. sorry if thatâs what you were hoping for but, if youâre going to a show on the tour, YOU WILL THANK ME LATER.
however i can say some stuff
like first of all: it is very much a kind of theatrical performance. no shit sherlock, you may be saying. okay sure but what i mean by that is that itâs not JUST a concert.
itâs very narrative based, thatâs the most iâm going to say on it.
additionally, based on stuff ww said after the show while everyone talking feedback and suchâŠ
after the tour starts, PLEASE DO NOT POST SPOILERS ON TUMBLR!!! this is the kind of thing youâre going to want to see without any idea going in.
like itâs also very much a comedy show and knowing all the jokes beforehand will kinda ruin it.
so if you wanna post about the show on tumblr after youâve seen it, maybe like. tag it or something. or put under a cut.
anyways i digress
the show was absolutely fantastic
genuinely the most wonderful iâve ever seen in my entire life
i laughed my ass off, i cried a little, i thought way too hard about my own life decisions
all the things youâd ever want
it was NOT what i expected it to be. but it was even better than whatever i was expecting
so PLEASE take my word that all of you are going to love it.
okay that train of thought is over anyways
the vending machine at the studio only took ones (LITERALLY FUCK OFF THATS SO DUMB) so i spent most of the show with the driest mouth known to man
iâd had a sprite from said vending machine when i first got there because they also donât have any water in it (????????) but not even like a whole can it got warm super fast
thatâs just a random aside
multiple people complimented both my button down shirt AND the oingo boingo shirt i had underneath
including willâs girlfriend!! who is very pretty and seems very very nice.
she took our phones at the doors and checked our IDs and such and she was fine with the fact that i do not own a piece of ID that confirms my date of birth so that was cool.
the phone pouches we had were handmade by her apparently! they were really cool and she did a great job
anyways
i met will after the show after trying to offer feedback while we were still doing that that and stumbling through my horrific brain fog to say nothing of value because i was terribly sleep deprived!
me and jay (@jayjamjary) went at the same time
now some background.
me and jay are friends IRL, we go to the same college. people who both A. follow me and B. consistently read my ramblings in the tags will know this. but there are like three of those people AND iâm putting tags on this post so yeah
anyways we are both members of the executive board of the (officially recognized) GARFIELD CLUB at our university.
i am dead serious
and because the garfield clubâs primary demographic is gay/trans autistic people, thereâs a huge population of will wood fans in that club.
so jay brought two excellent drawings heâd made for the club, originally to recruit members, for will to sign.
because we have garfield show and tell contest on wednesday and we wanted to fuckin win
ANYWAYS.
these drawings, by the way, just happened to be of garfield being crucified and of garfield as hatsune miku.
willâs reaction to seeing these drawings was, and i quote, âwhat the fuckâ
his reaction to the existence of the garfield club was, and i quote, âwhat the fuckâ
both like a very amused, bewildered what the fuck.
he then signed them with possibly the greatest thing heâs ever signed ANYTHING and iâll have to force jay to post them.
anyways
i also showed him a drawing i made for him, because i wanted to make a drawing for him.
he said my drawing was really really cool and he was really happy that i got his nose right because he never sees that
i was SO happy to hear that i was like ready to cry i was scared that drawing sucked
cuz i just did in the course of like a few hours while sitting at a random table in a big room on campus and all that whatever
but like yeah he called his girlfriend over she complimented it too
he signed it!!!
we took a picture and it looked a million times better than the two other pictures i have with him so thatâs great
anyways
iâm trying very pointedly to avoid saying anything about the actual show because i want people to be able to go in blind
because *i* did and it was amazing
and iâm so glad that the show iâm going to is going to be super different apparently so iâll ALSO have no idea what to expect from that
also, for anyone curious, iâm going to asbury park/halloween show november 3rd (and im going as young ford pines, specifically that time in tbob when he was possessed by bill, so if you see that there, thatâs me)
anyways
man take shot anytime i say anyways
youâll be fuckin dead
i had a great night, it was a spectacular show, youâre all gonna love it when you see it
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Thereâs Three of You?! Pt. 2
As stated before: no, no one asked me to write this. Yes, I thought about all this. Yes, Iâm doing listening excersizes (just like in junior high aaaaaaalllllll over again) for the dialogues.
Warnings: foul language, might be some medical inconsistencies.
CHAPTER 2
I had just parked outside of the 21st Districtâs Police Department, my brotherâs phone in my passengerâs seat on top of my coat. I cozied up before getting out of my car.
That idiot doesnât lose his head because God was nice enough to super-glue it to his neck.
I made my way inside and notice the woman at the desk, she looks imposing, a woman with authority.
She must be the desk Sergeant.
I made my way over to her, a polite smile on my face.
âHi, Iâm intern Dr. Lillian Halstead⊠my brother works here.â I say to her, she looks at me, genuinely shocked.
âI wasnât aware Chuckles had a sister.â she said, I snorted at her nickname for my brother.
âChuckles? Thatâs a good one SergeantâŠâ I read her name tag âPlatt. Pleasure to meet you.â I added.
âPleasureâs mine. So, what did Chuckles do now?â she asked, I pulled out his phone.
âIdiot forgot this at my place last night when he left after watching the game together.â I say, the woman let out a hearty laugh.
âMen and their sports.â she said, then she looked at me again. âCome on, weâre going up through the back, I heard those knuckleheads will be back any minute now.â she said, coming out from behind the desk, asking someone to cover for her and nodding with her head for me to follow.
We went around the back and went upstairs to the locker rooms, we exchanged numbers and she went back to the desk. I heard everyone come back and Antonio comment on the things theyâd missed, then Sergeant Hank Voight gave some orders for the guys to go out again.
âActually, I think I'm gonna do this by myself, O.â said the new guy, Atwater
âOh hey, everyone, Atwater's been in the unit two minutes and already he's put himself in charge.â said detective Olinsky, Jay had told me about him.
Everyone started clapping and I did too, decided it was time to show myself.
âIâm not even in this unit and I know one of its most important rules.â everyone turned to look at me, even Voight, who had started to make his way to -what I assume is- his office, I had taken off my winter coat and had my lab coat on top of my blue scrubs. Jay looked surprised to see me there.
âAnd whatâs that rule kiddo?â asked the sergeant, I smirked.
âWhatever Sergeant Voight says goes.â I said, he let out a small chuckle.
âSmart girl.â Voight said, then Jay spoke.
âWhat the hell are you doing here?â he asked.
âYou left something very important at my place last night.â I answered.
âNo I didnât.â he said, I could see everyone following our conversation as if it was a tennis match.
âYes you did.â
âI wouldâve notice it.â
This man.
âAlright smartass, could you maybe call me? I think I left my phone in the car.â
Jay reached to his front right pocket, then to his left, then both his back pockets with a face of pure terror. He sat down, open his drawers and, alas, no phone. I decided to have mercy on him. I pulled out his phone from my lab coat pocket.
He look at it, sighed in relief and walked over to me.
âI guess I did forget something. Thanks.â he said, reaching out his hand for the phone.
âFully charged and updated.â I slapped his hand away and gave him a serious look. âPlease, for the love of God, donât loose or break it. Remember that I gifted it to you for Christmas last year.â I added.
âIâm not that careless.â Lies!
âTell that to your previous three phones!â
âColateral damage during UC ops.â I slapped him behind the head this time. âOw! Sorry.â
âSorry doesnât begin to cut it when it comes to that. You know I worry, and yet, you go and still do UC work. Youâll make me go gray before my time!â I exclaimed, I heard some snorts and laughs.
âYou brought me my phone back, charged and updated, for that Iâm gonna hug you.â he warned me, I shrugged and accepted the hug. âIâm gonna lift you.â I panicked at that.
âWhat? No. Jay-!â he wouldnât let me go.
âReady? On three. OneâŠâ
âDonât you dare Halstead!â I warned.
âTwo.â
âI swear to God! Jason!â he ignored me again.
âThree!â and true to his word, his hands went to my hips, and he lifted me, turning us both around. I started laughing along with him.
âOk, ok, I give. I give! Jay!â I said in between laughs, then he placed me back on the ground, he tighten his hold on me, leaving a kiss on my forehead.
âI love you, you know that right?â he asked me, I snorted.
âI could say the same thing to you.â I said, we pulled apart and I finally gave him his phone. He pocketed it.
âGonna introduce us to the pretty lady?â asked, who I can only guess is, Ruzek.
âYou havenât told them about me?â I say in a fake offended tone, Jay let out a sigh.
âDrama Queen.â he mutter under his breath, then spoke in a normal voice. âAlright, everyone. This is my baby sister, Lilly Halstead. Sheâs finishing her internship at Lakeshore.â he said.
âThereâs two of you?!â asked Ruzek in disbelief.
âYeah⊠and Iâm the prettier one out of the two of us.â I say in a stage whisper, he pushes my head to the side, I laugh.
âWeâre both good looking. Letâs leave it at that.â he said, I nodded. Just then, my phone ringed. I raised my finger to signal Iâd take the call
âDr. Halstead.â I answered.
âWhere in Godâs name are you?â it was my attending, pissed.
Shit.
âAs I asked you before leaving. I said I had to go and deliver my brotherâs phone to him. Iâm at his place of work.â I said, taking a deep breath, I could feel everyones eyes on me.
âI never gave you permission to go.â My expression showed my frustration and annoyance.
âYes you did. If youâd actually been listening instead of checking half of the female internsâs asses-â
âDonât you dare talk to me like that. Iâm your attending, and I could very well punish you for that sentence.â
âYou gave me permission to leave.â I repeated.
âI did not. I want you back at the hospital. Now.â
âYou have no idea who my brother is, do you?â I asked him, done with his attitude.
âNo, and I donât care.â
âYou should Dr. Hobber⊠you should. By the way, howâs your wife? Does she know that youâre cheating on her?â everyoneâs eyes, even Voightâs, were as wide as saucers at my question.
âExcuse me? How dare you-?â hes started to defend himself, I cut him off.
âDoes she know that you do it with girls who are half her age? And how are your kids? I hear your eldest had a big soccer game last week? Is he still going to go to that private elementary school you bragged about?â I asked him, tone denoting my smirk.
âHalstead, donât try me, you know I just need to say a bad comment about you and youâre out.â
âYou even dare to go after my internship and I swear to God Iâll ruin your life⊠guess having a CPD detective working in the Intelligence Unit, for a brother does wonders to your observation skills.â
âWait what? Your brotherâs a cop? Halstead-!!â I hung up on my boss.
âAnd that is how you deal with your jackass of an attending.â I said, everyone clapped, I gave small bows. âThank you, thank you, but I really gotta go. I bet heâll want to have my ass for this.â
âHey, he tries anything and Iâll swing by, badge on full display so he knows to back off. Maybe even add the bulletproof vest.â Jay said.
âEven I can pay you a visit.â Voight said, we all turned to him, shocked.
âReally?â asked Erin, my brotherâs partner.
âYeah. Put the fear of God in him. Show him no one messes with one of our own.â I was impressed by that.
âThanks guys, I really appreciate it, but I have a folder about yay big with all the evidence of this guy being the worst kind of scumbag. It includes pictures, testimonies, forwarded screenshots, and a recorded phone conversation transcript between him and one of the girls who wants him out, pretty much everything to get HR to fire him.â I said, giving an estimate size with my fingers. Jay side hugged me and kissed my temple.
âThatâs my girl.â he said, I smiled.
After another quick hug and promises of a drink later that day, I left the precinct back to the hospital. As soon as I parked back at the hospital staffâs parking lot, I took out the folder from itâs safe place.
âShow time.â I said to myself and walked inside, straight to the administratorâs office.
Tag list: @escapingrealtiylovinginsanity
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