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something that’s been bugging me all day: how would you teach perspective drawing in a society that existed entirely within, say, a varied-gravity spaceship? so much of how we understand perspective is based on the existence of the horizon and our relationship to it. what if there’s no horizon? vanishing points as a concept depend on having a ground to be parallel or perpendicular to.
#genuinely i think it’s difficult to fully get your head around how much photography has affected the way we think about art#like. perspective drawing is WEIRD.#putting an image of a 3 dimensional environment onto a flat surface is EXPONENTIALLY more convoluted than flattening a globe into a map#and yet there’s intense debate over the ‘best’ of dozens of world map projections#but we think of photographs as objective fact#and even THEN perspective drawing is usually *still insufficient to simulate photography*#but perspective and distance are still clearly real#things that are further away look smaller#there’s even mathematical consistency to it#but how do you explain how to flatten it#to someone who’s got no idea what ‘down’ means#…i should really be getting work done#mumbling
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like many who have suffered at the hands of bbc merlin before me, i recently indulged in a thought experiment in which i outlined my own version of seasons 3-5 that stay thematically and tonally in line with the show (except they're less fucking stupid). but then i quickly realized that focusing on details is pointless: all you need is to solve the one Big Problem the show has, and the rest will follow. the problem in question? ✨morgana✨
i like the first two seasons. s1 achieves what it sets out to do and has fun while doing it, and s2, while flawed, sets up a ton of potential that the following seasons unfortunately squander, beginning with the insidious season 3. you can only distract me with cute knights and goblins and fart jokes for so long before i start seeing through you, evil, evil season of television.
my hypothesis is that if the writers had crafted s3 morgana into anything more sympathetic than a violent half-alive poltergeist that can never be reasoned with because she's suddenly terminally off her rocker, everything would've fallen into place. a sympathetic morgana would've made real, valid arguments against uther (and arthur) that wouldn't just be the ramblings of a woman possessed. her betrayal of arthur would have stemmed from her feeling increasingly morally superior to him because of his complacency in the face of their father's tyranny. under morgause's guidance she would stop believing that arthur is capable of change, and the whole point would be that she might actually be right. arthur would have to actively try and prove her wrong, instead of getting praised for doing the bare minimum because the bar is on the floor.
furthermore, morgana's prophetic dream about arthur and gwen becoming king and queen and her decision to prevent this however she can is a direct parallel to merlin learning about that same prophecy and making it happen by any means necessary. merlin's desires about his and arthur's futures are subtextually fueled by gay love and devotion, so why couldn't morgana's be? why couldn't she properly express her bitterness that arthur gets to be with gwen in a way she can't "took gwen away" from her, instead of suddenly declaring that gwen is nothing more than a servant, after two seasons of demonstrating again and again that she loves, values, and respects gwen more than anyone else in that godforsaken castle?
following this, an angry and emotionally volatile but still sensible morgana asking gwen to stay by her side during the coup of the castle in the s3 finale and gwen going behind her back to help arthur and the knights would've hurt like a bitch. double-sided betrayal! gwen having a real plot! the proper beginnings of a toxic yuri that would shape a generation!
then there's the utter hubris of having morgana shoot arrows at the same civilians she worried herself sick over for 2 seasons — even morgan, her medieval counterpart that was rooted in every sexist trope in existence, doesn't just go around killing senselessly but instead has (often petty!) personal vendettas against gwen, arthur, and the knights. morgana had every right to be sick of the pretensions around chivalry in camelot (she was always quick to mock it, even in s1), and to lash out at the knights and soldiers after years of feeling powerless in a castle full of armed men that blindly followed her oppressor. the show conveniently forgets that morgana was victimized as a woman as well as a sorcerer those first 2 seasons.
but like i said, this is not just about morgana. allowing her to remain a real and multifaceted character even as she betrays everyone in pursuit of her ambitions would've given the rest of the core four more interesting conflict to work with: merlin because he would have to experience real consequences to his actions, arthur because he would watch his sister go against his father (and his knights, and his birthright) and experience some actual internal dilemmas about it, and gwen because she would be forced to choose between morgana and arthur without the pretense that it's an obvious or easy choice for her to make.
even morgause and gaius would come off more interesting as mentors: neither one inherently evil or inherently good, both jaded by events that happened before our protagonists were even born, both heavily influencing morgana and merlin into fulfilling roles that they think are appropriate, but that morgana and merlin may not have chosen for themselves had they not been under their care.
you get the gist. if the show followed its own setup, morgana's mistakes wouldn't lie in cheap and senseless acts of violence but in alienating the people she loves because she is too hurt and jaded to trust them. meanwhile, everybody else would feel guilt over "failing" her and yet they would be too caught up in their own (sometimes flawed!) beliefs of right and wrong to truly see her point of view.
arthur would convince himself it was sorcery that corrupted her. merlin would know that isn't true but he wouldn't be able to argue without confessing everything, which is the defining conflict between him and morgana and it's cheapened when she's just an evil witch caricature and merlin is framed as inherently virtuous in contrast. gwen, too, would become a more active participant in her own life by choosing arthur over morgana and choosing to rule camelot with him instead of just waiting politely to see where things go.
and, of course, uther's downfall and death would be quick, final, and completely earned — when and why did the show even decide he of all people was the sympathetic villain, anyway?
lastly, and perhaps controversially, i think morgana should've learned merlin's true identity by season 4. her being the first of the main characters to find out makes perfect sense considering their shared history and their interconnected and mirrored arcs. even the show seems to agree, considering she does find out a little before arthur. but the narrative itself tried pointing flashing neon arrows towards this way earlier — there is a whole entire episode in s4 where merlin being emrys is repeatedly spelled out for morgana and she still isn't allowed to see it. that episode makes her look like the stupidest person to ever live, which is pretty funny im not gonna lie, but also another frustrating thing in the endless string of frustrating things that make up this show.
morgana learning that merlin has magic would've transformed the source of merlin's anxiety from a crippling fear of being outed someday to the crippling fear of knowing she could out him at any moment. this would make him want to beat her to the punch (perhaps he'd consider killing her for a minute and decide against it because she isn't a cartoonishly insane evil person in my version of events) and maybe he would even feel some tentative excitement at the idea of coming clean, now that it seems inevitable. after all, he always intended to tell arthur eventually! and i think gaius would have to admit outright that he does not want merlin to tell arthur he has magic because he, gaius, simply cannot risk such a gamble. it would be so interesting to see gaius and merlin clash and disagree once it becomes obvious that it's not merlin that isn't ready for the reveal, it's gaius. delicious!
with morgana's knowledge looming, things would inevitably spiral into a magic reveal by the end of season 4. i picture this season as an absolute mess of miscommunication between everyone at camelot, which is, y'know, canon. growing increasingly cunning and vengeful, morgana would use this tension to her advantage, destabilizing the court from the outside while she creates alliances with other sorcerers outside of camelot (instead of living alone in a hovel for no reason — morgana le fay i'm sorry i'm so sorry they gave you agravaine instead of your all-female entourage oh my god).
and here's where the events would change beyond recognition (aka here's where the meta becomes the fanfic i refuse to write). picture it with me: a militia of sorcerers infiltrates camelot and arthur and gwen have to set aside their differences (assuming gwen kissing lancelot and arthur overreacting happens, which it should) for the good of the kingdom as well as for love. picture high priestess morgana in her element, side by side with a bunch of misfit sorcerers that aren't so easily vilified, chopping down camelot's soldiers and knights and assuredly making their way to the newly-minted king.
then, just as it starts to seem that all hope is lost, in swoops merlin (the actual merlin, not his old fart disguise) on dragonback (kilgharrah hates morgana so much i know his sexist ass would stoop to anything to stop her)!!! imagine merlin showing off the extent of his powers in front of everyone and preventing the sorcerers from getting any further, declaring loud and clear that camelot is protected by him, by emrys. imagine that display of power alone being enough to send everyone home.
imagine the loyalties clearly drawn: merlin on arthur's side, morgana on the sorcerers'. imagine arthur, feeling confused and betrayed by everyone at this point, banishing merlin despite everything he's done for him in the angstiest, most emotionally dysregulated scene the show had ever put to screen. imagine merlin starting season 5 free at last but very lonesome, an embittered dragonlord like his father. imagine the absolute mess camelot would become without him, even with gwen — now queen guinevere — there to pick up the slack. imagine arthur actually earning merlin back, finally growing into his role as king as he does so. imagine the reunion.
all this and more could've been not just possible but inevitable if morgana was allowed to remain a complex character that is neither inherently good nor inherently evil: it was undeniably the biased and one-note treatment of morgana's downfall by the writers that set the precedent for literally everything else that happened after merlin chose to poison her. the show wouldn't have even had to jeopardize its tone or the monster-of-the-week vibe, all it would've had to do is admit that even the "good guys" are capable of mistakes and what makes them good is the ability to feel remorse and change for the better. (as opposed to uther, who was miles beyond redemption since way before the pilot and deserved to lose everything and die alone. OBVIOUSLY???)
in a world where morgana remains multifaceted and sympathetic, mordred would get a better arc as well, so if we really wanted to, we could still end on the same tragic note that the show ended on. with so much harm inflicted onto so many innocent people by the pendragons for so long (including mordred and the many druids and sorcerers that raised him), it could realistically end up being a little too late for anything more than one shining glimpse of king arthur and the sorcerer merlin's short-lived golden age before fate catches up to them. glimpsing that reality just to immediately lose it would've been far more satisfying and far more tragic than whatever the writers thought they were doing with all that pointless carrot-dangling.
and finally, an ending in line with morgana's new and improved arc. in this version, rather than bleeding out on the forest floor alone, she would channel the morgan le fay we know from the legends: sobered up by the reality of her brother dying, she would use her high priestess status (and perhaps also her pendragon status) to be granted passage over to avalon alongside arthur on the boat — a one-way ride — just to make sure he gets there safely. this is her penance for the harm she has caused, the same way arthur's penance is to die and leave the true ruler of camelot (gwen) behind to achieve everything he was too slow and indecisive to build while he still had time.
merlin's penance, then, would be to stay behind and watch them cross over without him, waiting and waiting and waiting until they come back or until he can finally join them. which is a bit fucking harsh if i'm honest, so i'd at least make it slightly more faithful to the legends by having him return as an old man and letting him take a long nap under a tree by the shore, his body slowly enveloped by vines like the cobwebbed fisher king in 3x08, never fully sure if he's dreaming or if there really are strange shapes fading in and out of the fog over the lake. still tragic, but nevertheless a little more open-ended and whimsical than [TRUCK NOISES] THE END!
#[johnny the dragon voice] ✨ MORGANA ✨#tldr: if you treat your villain with nuance then more nuance will follow and your story will be better for it! groundbreaking i know!!!#what im also getting at is that morgana broke free FIRST so she DESERVED to become the morgan le fay of legend#way before any of the others grew into their own roles.#morgana#bbcm#bbc merlin#analysis#merlin meta#morgana pendragon#theres no focus on the knights here but if you know me you know how angry i am about s4 and s5 gwaine at all times#so in a story with a more nuanced portrayal of villainy and knighthood i think he would openly question his choice to become one#and maybe he'd leave for a while#go home and sort out his daddy issues. have some fruity subplots along the way. visit merlin during his dragonlord era. that sort of thing#and interact with lancelot at least once!!! for gods sake#but i dont see lancelot surviving sorry. that dude will literally die for anything#also scientists and tv execs had not yet discovered bisexuality in 2011 and he already had everyone acting unwise#in ways that barely got past the censors :/ unsustainable#elyan however shouldnt have died. i know gwen ruling alone with only the lamest knights in her service is “the point”#but its a stupid point. elyan is her best knight and they rule camelot together. working class heroes etc.#poetic justice for their father who was murdered by uther + a fun narrative contrast to morgana and arthur#nightmare siblings of all time. banished from the mortal realm for their crimes. could never rule together. stinky#ANYWAY. I HAVE THREE (3) EXAMS DUE THIS WEEK. HERE'S TWO THOUSAND (2000) WORDS OF BBC MERLIN ANALYSIS.
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I just got through all your tags. And I know dropping into your inbox with a wagging tail is probably getting old, but here I am again to say thank you and tell you you're precious. Sounds like you are out there saving the world during the week day, so I'm privileged to provide you some chuckles at the end of the day.
Hi hi no please by all means you are welcome to come scream in my inbox (and request if you wish) xD it's great really! your fics and stuff legit made me look forward to the weekend :D
I was going to draw one of the many nikprice you posted (the, the one where Price has heart eyes for Nik when he was drunk) today but the ghostprice fic took over my brain KAJSHD for now I have this for youuuuuuuu
grumpy Price who just woke up and Nik looking for a snack
#askjh please i am still a student who just started their hellish work haha aint saving the world#yet#i hope i can pass this semester and graduate HAA#new peeps if you havent alr check out their blog you'll get the best fic there and your world axis turned (for the better) i promise#im sure the nikprice enjoyers/freaks are beyond happy to have you here with us#ask response#thanks for the ask <3#nikprice
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I saw this super goofy looking whiskey glass and decided I needed Jason to give it to Harvey as a joke (Harvey thinks it's dumb, but he does take it out sometimes to use when he's having a rough one.)
#I wanted to do a follow-up of him using it secretly but.... maybe? we'll see!!#this is the first time I've ever drawn Harvey and yk what? not bad#I'm trying my best here and hey! it's working out!#don't look at Jay's hands <3 I couldn't be bothered to make them nice <3 this is a silly little scribble#also looks better than 90% of my art bc I was looking at references so I could draw them nicely#uuuuugh references making your art better is so illegal to me </3 why can't my head be enough </3#art#fanart#digital art#illusketch#comic#... I guess?#the grains#manga style#jason todd#jason todd wayne#red hood#harvey dent#two face#batfam#well. sort of.#also I'm liking the grains colour style#it's a little bit gorgeous and stylish and maybe even a bit cool...#also also I tried to do that cool thing where people use their name/sign like a logo on people's clothes#I want to be cool too...#also... never sure how I want to draw Jay's hair lmao#I think like 50% of my private fics are written about him and yet I rarely draw him bc#I just can't decide on his hair....
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first art post of the new year!!! granted, i don't share my art here that much anyway, but– shhh.
hehehehhhooo,, here's something i've been working on for 'bout a month,, albeit not consecutively– took a few,, very very long breaks in between working on this,, but i managed to finish it in the end! am i satisfied with it? .......ehhhh? not completely, but if this took any longer, it might not have seen the light of day, so like. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.
anyway,, made a little poster for my favorite fic, tommyinnit's services for villains, vigilantes, and various other vagabonds, by @scorpionoesit!!! it's really really good,,, and i've always wanted to make more art for it,, so i decided– poster! at least,, that's what it's mean to resemble,,, dkdmkdmdkd.
i will freely admit,, i'm... not the biggest fan of the fan-made logo i tried to design for it,, feels a bit boring, and could definitely have used a bit more pizazz, something to make feel more like the fic itself(what does that mean? you figure that out),,,, but– again, steam was running low,, dkdnksjs. graphic design is my passion. i do also have other complaints, but i'm afraid i already punched my one-use self-critique card,, oh well,,, dkdnkxjdkd.
regardless,, even with the flaws only i can really see,, this still turned out pretty okay!! hope you enjoy it, mx. scorpio and mx. alibi!!! and i hope everyone else has a wonderful new year!!!!
#my art#dream smp#services for vagabonds#tommyinnit fanart#tommyinnit#i don't wanna try tagging the rest of them so i'm just not gonna <3#anyway wrow i wonder who the skull guy and mysterious shadowy figure are....... could be anyone.#i was gonna try and fit in some sort of hero so i could check all the dots of everyone tommy's help#specifically either dr**m (derogatory) or phil#(was mostly leaning towards phil)#but 1) couldn't figure out a way to make it look good with the current set up#my first thought was to try moving the current characters around a bit; but then it would feel too crowded#my second thought was to have them appear from the smoke; somehow? a smoky figure?#but that only really looked good in sketch form and i didn't have the patience to figure that out properly#and 2) no clue what their designs look like. don't even know what their powers are; yet!#was also wanting to fit fundy in but it didn't work for the first reason#fun rapid fire character design facts: niki has a littol sharp tooth 'cause of the joker stuff!#i originally gave tubbo green eyes;; but i decided blue-green looked cooler#tech– [cough] i mean;; *orion's* cloak has a faint lil orion pattern on can barely see it but it's there i assure you !!!#(i tried my best for his design but i am. not the greatest at outfits;; especially hero/villain ones)#tommy has long hair bc it's *MY* art and *I* say he gets long hair. this definitely isn't canon to vagabonds i just like to do this#<- also why michael and tommy have freckles#tommy has a bit of green in his design(through the patch) due to a theory of mine :D#might have over-rendered the hair a bit but. fuck you i like it#anyway i think that's all i have to say about it? if you've actually read all these tags;;; have a cookie -> 🍪#pretend it's a peanut butter cookie#actually. no pretend it's both. you get two cookies. as a treat.#anyway have a good rest-of-your-day !!!!!!
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tagged by my beloveds @cordiallyfuturedwight and @aprylynn for the july list <33 i'm terribly afraid the glen powell of it all got to me this july and thus..
you can find this country music for beginners playlist here and check out lizzy's guide to the delicate art of making a playlist for a breakdown from yours truly if you feel so inclined <33
tagging my musical favs if they haven't already: @thvinyl @kimtaegis @jihopesjoint @visionsofgideontheninth @hoseeok @eoieopda @monismochi <333 and your lovely self reading this also
#and now for the facts and figures:#charleston girl - some of my absolute fav childers. a lot of banjo from the offset so maybe need to work your way up to this one#chorus is so anthemic you find yourself beginning to think you were raised in west virginia#wondering why - it's fantastic. no notes. and if you're on this site i know you at least saw mr supernatural himself cover it#all your'n - it's a twofer for childers and this is perhaps one of the greatest love songs ever written but it's best not to get into that#you and i - this one's been here before and it'll no doubt be here again!! i can say with 95% confidence this is my favourite lady gaga.#jo calderone you will always be famous. it's a country song at heart#all the ways - i have loved this song all year. it's so soulful and feels a bit like early bonnie raitt. ray lamontagne feature is inspired#broken horses - another anthem of a chorus. whole song feels like a kick in the teeth it's exceptional#country's cool again - good lord. everybody do wanna be a cowboy#think i'm in love - was pronounced dead for 3 minutes after i'd heard this one.#luckily the song was on repeat and dua kept hitting those low notes which revived me#bodyguard - song of the summer honestly. i know i say this a lot but cmon#revival - love for this one was reignited after the maggie rogers / springsteen live feature. almost biblical#i think that's it. well. do check out all country music if you haven't had the chance yet. they're doing some wonderful stuff over there#receiptify#tag#MWAH
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update on making my mom watch glee .
#yeehawing#glee#faberry#we were talking about the quinn/finn/rachel dynamic and i pointed out how rachel is always at her worst with finn and her best with quinn#and my mom was talking through trying to figure out Why that was and said that she couldnt figure it out that she didnt have any frame of#reference to pull from her own life(how she normally works out understanding characters/relationships) and so i was like. Well.#their feelings for each other are very reminiscent of the feelings between girls who dont realize that they like girls yet...#and i could see the cartoon lightbulb switch on in her head#and she said /youre Right/ in her This Is A Revelation voice#i win<3#also i made the achievement Ourple bc faberry is a very purple-pink colored word<3
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I am sorry you've been harrassed by terfs, but the way you are currently trying to weed them out seems a bit misguided. As in, the vast majority of terfs are in fact ok with big hairy CIS men. The so-called men they are actively hating are trans women/transfem people. So by acting like you proclaiming your love to big hairy dudes is the best terf-repellant you seem to be missing the point at best.
i'd love to actually respond to your concerns or whatever the hell it was that you were trying to convey with this ask, but it has almost no basis in reality so i literally cant.
thats the one statement on how effective i think the banners are that has left my queue so far. which is: i hope it works but also have literally 2 other backup plans already in case it does not. i dont know why youre calling that "acting like [me] proclaiming [my] love to big hairy dudes is the best terf-repellant", because thats wildly off target from what i have actually said at any point. everything else youve said is also pretty much either dead wrong or ignorant, so im getting the feeling that you not reading has been a problem for a while.
(ive also not mentioned terfs this entire time--ive been talking about radfems and using the word radfems. they're not the same thing although there's large overlap. so like. thats strike two for zero reading comprehension, buddy. cause you are literally not talking about the group im talking about and youre also inventing whole new sentences that i didnt say.)
#obviously reading ability does not equal intelligence. more about the wild overconfidence of someone who didnt bother to check if they#even read a statement correctly#i misread things all the time which is why i also dont barge into strangers inboxes to insult THEIR intelligence#because i know theres always a chance im completely wrong and i dont want to be an asshole#anon you could give that a try#like what am i even supposed to say to this ? i dont think its the best terf repellant and have never said that ?#but if you know so much about them go ahead and tell us your suggestions for how to get rid of them#im skeptical that they will make any sense at all but im always open to new ideas#(feels nice to be condescended to doesnt it ? i assume thats why you were condescending to me so im returning the favor <3)#anyway other than this fool thank you all for the supportive asks im glad youre enjoying the banners ! so am i :D#way too soon to tell if theyre working (no radfems yet but i usually get a wave of them every couple months so i wont jump to conclusions)#but just as blog decor theyre already great#there are many many asks though and i dont enjoy when this blog is less fiber craft than other stuff#so im reading each one and appreciating them but please dont be upset that im not responding to them or posting them#i have the first 2 i got in my queue and then i got like 20 more so
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Silly goofy StanNarrator (Patreon)
#Doodles#The Stanley Parable#TSP#Silly mode leftover doodles from my alt notebook#I wasn't as concerned with making these finished or pretty but they did turn out cute >:3c#Since I've established that Sinister thinks in images the next logical step is imagining the Narrator - and he hates that ✨#He is not made to be perceived! He is an imageless entity! A total enigma! Lol#If we as an audience can imagine what a Narrator might look like - to the best of our abilities - I don't see why Stanley wouldn't#Even if he's not Exact - personally I don't think it matters lol the Narrator isn't /meant/ to have a fixed form imo - it's still flustering#You give him so much material to work with Narra! To imagine what face you might make or your body language#Or worst yet when he plays with the mental projection like a doll - much like what the Narrator does to Stanley hehehe#How does it feel to be ''made'' to do things that wouldn't reflect you! It's an interesting role reversal that works within their confines#Also makes me wonder how much Narra would play into it haha - if Stanley ''flipped him upside down'' would he get dizzy? Even a little?#To what degree is he real! To what degree is Stanley real if he's not being interacted with!! The themes!!!! <3#Anyway lol ♪ Silly Stanley noise chart for funsies#There are a lot of sounds humans can make with their mouths even discounting vocal cords - I could definitely see him doing verbal stims#Who me projecting again? Psh no anyway (lol)#And then some kisses! This is my first time drawing my versions kissing!!! Which actually solidified a new headcanon for the Narrator haha#Because he (ostensibly) needs his mouth to narrate he doesn't like kisses on the mouth :) He weak to it!#Doesn't stop Sin from enjoying kissing him lol - it's a good way to shut up him In Case of Power Play#But sometimes♪ he'll try to respect his wishes - not all the time tho haha
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hello 🖤 i'm so excited to start my second playthrough of bg3! my first one was pretty much a mess lol but i had so much fun. but still i got my happy ending with gale so i'm not complaining. which romance should i do next? i feel like usually your opinions are on point and tbh i'm not very interested in astarion (he's pretty cool but clearly not my cup of tea lol). anyway, have a nice day :)
thank you so much for your message! 🖤
i heard a lot of good things about shadowheart's romance from @vilemoonwitch. i think if you liked gale's, you will like hers as well. it's very slow burn and a very emotional journey.
i also am trying out karlach's right now with a different character and she's a lot of fun as well -- with a hint of tragedy. she's very forward and very energetic as a character, but she also a lot of depth to her with her background story and there were one or two scenes that genuinely brought me to tears.
and despite my criticisms regarding the quality of a later scene, i also found myself enjoying wyll's quite a lot. his re-write was overall very well-done and i found myself taking him along nearly everywhere.
#i have not seen lae's yet but if her friendship path is anything to go by i think her romance could be very beautiful as well#i'm sorry i am trying to describe them while also being vague enough so you don't get spoilered#i think it's best to play your character and just see what feels right / who they work best with#but maybe i could at least give you a small overview 🖤#text: asks#text: personal#vg: baldur's gate 3#series: baldur's gate#bg3 spoilers
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#periodical life updates#(<- NUMBER 3!!!) I FINISHED THE ANIMATION AND EVERYTHING FOR THAT PROJECT AND SENT IT OFF! super excited!!#it looks really cute! i tried my best and im mostly satisfied of where i landed <33#it's my little sibling's birthday today!! it's also the first official meeting of lgbt club!! (the other event was a fun lgbt mixer)#my backpack smells bad. like mildew or mold maybe? urgh its awful and gives me a headache. i might need a new one. i dont know. urghhh.#my programming homework is due today!! yike!! but other than that my personal projects with deadlines are all done!#INIQUITY NOW THAT YOU HAVE TIME ARE YOU FINALLY GONNA WORK ON YOUR SELF SHIP BLOG?? YES!! HOPEFULLY!!#truthfully i /have/ been working on it on the side. it looks decent but the colors;;; i have always been pretty sht at color picking?#i can adjust with filters but without that im like. a little not good yet lmao. gotta do some studies sometime perhaps#BUT YAY EXCITED!! ive got some rambles and doodles and a tag system and f/o info which is extremely cumbersome (affectionate)!!#also i have new fandom ocs for the latest dimension 20 campaign and im so delighted heho <33 this campaign is literally so fun.#im watching it with my sibling when its done!! OOH ALSO I FIGURED OUT HOW TO PNGTUBE AND i will likely never use it BUT COOL!!#i dont like. talk. lmao. my art streams are 1) silent 2) rare 3) only shared with my siblings. pngtuber is a little useless. but CUTE!!#i got boba tea yesterday!! sandy bought it :3 <3 and we're having pho and cheesecake later and i might plan out a little excursion today?#like i might get a treatsie. OR i'll just sit on campus as usual and get a mango smoothie and draw for a while (or work on homework.)#(lets be honest its likely the former. i might get a little back into traditional? ooh or maybe i'll practice my asl?) HEY THOUGH.#ive been thinking about making a henrey stickmn (ask)blog to practice asl? like. no plot. just henry teaching ellie and charles asl#really funny considering my Real concept of an askblog for THSC. not ace or eca; but a secret third thing (⛎) ;)#then again since when have i EVER followed through on an askblog lmao?? damb im all over the place today. we're already hitting tag limit#okay!! 3 AM!! if im going early tomorrow i gotta eep! goodnight everyone i love you!! see you tomorrow if i have the energy and time!!
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questions I have about astarion romance storyline, I have lots of thoughts about him and want help from people who have played already, uh spoilers for his early romance plot below
does anyone know if you have to have sex with astarion for his romance scenes to lead up to you both working together to figure out what you both really want?
haven't gotten to play yet, and while he's undeniability charming (like he's trying to be) I'd like to refuse him without it shutting off the romance if that's an option? I'd still want to pick flirty options when I think they'd be fun but the character I have in mind would see through the more performative bits and wouldn't really be interested in sex with someone they think is lying to them, it would fit the character more if they refused.
I'm okay with mild spoilers if it relates to his story.
I feel like the answer will be no, and given the story stuff with him I've seen I could understand why, but this game has a lot of branching options so thought I might as well ask!
and if it is possible and because of everything astarion is dealing with we don't end up fucking ever that's totally okay with me
#Baldur's Gate 3#astarion#bg3 spoilers#baldur's gate 3 spoilers#the character im working on has been through similar flirting with others for gain and it wearing on them-#-so i think theyd see right through his more perfomative flirting#god this game has taken up so much of my brain since it came out and i cant even play it yet#got multiple class build ideas i want to mess around with and ive been thinking about which party members would work best together#im not Just interested in astarion btw i also want to date basically everyone else (in other playthroughs though since theyre not all poly)#hes just specifically dug his little claws into my brain and wont let go. im so not normal about him. i haven't even seen anyone get far-#-into act 2 yet but i just aaaaauhg he is so Much#at least i know when i do get the game ill get well over a dollar per hour of playtime#most ive talked in tags in awhile. if youre seeing this i hope you have a good day! (◍•ᴗ•◍)✧*#i have a feeling im going to play through so many damn choices of this game over and over just to see what happens
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I don't like thinking about work unless I'm at work but I have to talk through smth ignore me or whatever
#i want to quit soon but i dont know when the best time is#im working the next 2 mon/tues and then im off until the 14th#and the schedule for august isn't out yet so the last day im scheduled for now is the 25th#usually the schedule comes last minute#im considering..... telling my boss that my last day will be the 25th tomorrow#but if im going to do it i have to do it tomorrow#mayyyyybe Tuesday ig but i would wanna do it next week#but i cant see who im working with before i go in anymore. which is so terrible for so many reasons#i need to prepare before i go in and part of that is knowing who im gonna see but whatever#not only that but i wont know if my boss will be there for me to be able to quit until im there tomorrow#im also super anxious about quitting anyway i don't wanna have that conversation#and then i have to start looking for a new job#and im trying to move in the spring i need money#i did think... i could possibly bring the letter of resignation tomorrow.. hope he wont be there & leave it on his desk#and text him that it's there. but then theres not much of a conversation to be had#idek exactly how youre 'supposed to quit' but to me those rules are for employers you respect 💀#i dont respect these people ✌️#the only thing i feel bad about is that there'll only be one baker left in the company (6 almost 7 stores)#but its also not my fault that they haven't hired anyone and cant keep employees#i would've LOVED some help over the last few months as ive been the only baker in this district of 3 stores!!! they never hired anyone!!!!#i just have really not appreciated the way they've been treating me recently with all of the anxiety stuff#i also dont appreciated how my rights of privacy were violated 😀#and its literally coming to the point where im going to have to have uncomfortable conversations that i dont want to have#and/or literally take or at least threaten some legal action#or just quit!! and its not like im gonna be here much longer anyway even if i dont leave right now#i almost feel like... do i have a responsibility to hold them accountable for what they've done so it hopefully doesn't happen again#but idk i mean i didn't make them do this#tbh the more i think about it the more i want to quit tomorrow. im just nervous. and scared of not having a paycheck#idk its just scary!!! life is scary!!!!!
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Aaaaaaaaaaaah <3 <3 <3 omg I love it
Thank you thank you thank you
So happy to read this I can't wait for the next chapter !!
Batman, panicked by how much the villain knows about him and Jason, decides to infiltrate the Red Hood's gang with his Matches Malone's identity
Jason *oh shit he found out* : wtf wtf wtf is this a joke ? Are you making fun of me ???
Matches!Bruce *oh fuck he's even more unhinged than planned* : ... I don't understand, boss ?
Jason, struggling to find his words in way his men won't understand : you really thought I wouldn't recognize my own fa- urgh I mean genito- wait that not- hum, the guy that raised me ???
Matches!Bruce *wait oh shit the OG Matches Malone had a kid ???* : wait... *I don't even know his name!!* chum, I had to make sure it's really you, I wasn't sure, you understand ?
And then their relationship get better
except Jason is "argh I hate you but also you kinda made the effort of meeting me in my turf and also you didn't say anything about the killing so perhaps..."
and Bruce is like,"Oh shit I accidentally adopted the Red Hood, and also it's my fault his real father is dead, except he doesn't know that and must think Matches just abandoned him one day without any explanation. Also I should really figure out his name at some point"
#yetting ideas on tumblr and hoping for someone else to write it work !!!!#best day of my life#i love it#i love you#i love the prequel#<3#bruce wayne#jason todd#matches malone#undercover#accidental adoption#except he's already your son#tumblr prompt fill#red hood#batman#jason todd and bruce wayne#on my way to read all your batman fics#best day
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I'm autistic and I currently feel like shit checklist
Hi there. Are you autistic? Do you currently feel like shit and don't know why? Try this checklist to see if you can Fix The Problem!
When was the last time you used the bathroom? If you answered "I don't know" or "at least 3 hours ago", go now!
Do you need a drink? Go get one if you don't have one in front of you.
When was the last time you ate? If you haven't eaten yet today, consider eating A Meal, or perhaps A Snack. Something is better than nothing, eat whatever you feel able to!
Is there something in your immediate surroundings that is bothering you? If the light is too bright, turn it off. If there is an annoying sound, make the sound stop or reduce your ability to hear it (earplugs, headphones, etc.). If your clothes are bothering you, change them.
Is your space messy? Pick one area of your room and clean it up as best you can. Clean your whole room if you have the energy!
When was the last time you did An Activity? Scrolling on social media doesn't count. Try actively doing something fun! Play a game you like, read a book, make something, or go for a walk.
When was the last time you Spoke to a Person? Consider talking to a person you like if it has been a while.
How long has it been since you did something Special Interest related? Make some time to do that today. Infodump to a friend, have a nice long research session, look at related images or gifs, make art about it, whatever works best for you!
Try stimming actively! Put on some music and dance, spin in circles, go to the park and use the swings!
If you still feel like shit after trying all of these things, you might be tired or sick. Go to bed early and get some rest. Hopefully you will feel better tomorrow!
Hope that helps :)
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wait, Derin how did your leaving make the hospital shut down?
I used to work as a live-in nanny for a pediatrician.
Now, the thing about hospitals in my country is that they are massively understaffed and massively underfunded. This is especially true outside the major cities. The staff are worked to the bone and receive little to no help in things like finding accommodation or childcare, making working in rural areas a very uninviting prospect; staff come out here, get lumped with the work of three people (because there's nobody else to do it), burn out under the workload and leave, meaning that those remaining have even more work because that person is gone. It's unsustainable and the medical staff are doing their best to sustain it, because people die if they don't, so to the higher-ups it looks like everything's getting done and therefore everything is fine.
My friend (and boss) worked one week on, one week off, swapping out with another pediatrician. This was necessary because it would not be physically possible for one person to handle the workload for longer periods of time. The one single pediatrician had to hold up the entire pediatrics ward, which was not only the only public hospital pediatrics ward in our town, but also the one that served all the towns around us for a few hours' drive in all directions. I regularly saw her go to work sick, aching, tired, or with a debilitating 'I can barely make words or see' level migraine, because if she took a day off, twenty children didn't get healthcare that day, and some of these kids' appointments were scheduled weeks in advance. She'd work long hours in the day and then be called in a couple of times overnight for an hour or two at a time (she was on-call at night too, because somebody had to be), and then go in the next day. Sometimes she would be forced to take a day off because she physically could not stay awake for longer than a few minutes at a time, meaning she couldn't drive to work.
Cue my niece's second birthday coming up in Melbourne. I'd been working for her for about 3 years, and she (and the hospital) had plenty of advance warning that I (and therefore she) needed one (1) Friday off. That's fine, we'll find someone to work that Friday, the hospital said. Right up until the last week where they're like "oh, we can't find a replacement; you can come in, can't you?"
No, she tells them; I don't have anyone to watch my kid that day.
Oh, surely you can hire a babysitter for this one day, they say. Think of the children! We really really need you to work that day. I know we said it'd be fine but we need you now, there's no one else to do it.
There are no other babysitters, she told them. Unless you can find one?
That's not our responsibility, they said.
But I'm not changing my plans, she's got plans by now as well, the hospital knew about this one day weeks in advance, and with absolutely no reserve staff they're forced to reschedule all pediatrics appointments for that Friday. Not a huge deal, it happens on the 'physically too overworked to get out of bed' days too. I go to Melbourne, she goes back to her home in Adelaide for her recovery week, all should be on track.
My niece gives me Covid.
This was way back in the first wave of the pandemic, and there were no Covid vaccines yet. The rules were isolate, mask up, hope. I had Covid in the house, and it would've been madness for my friend and her toddler to come back into the Covid house instead of staying in Adelaide. There was absolutely no way that a pediatrician could live with someone in quarantine due to Covid and go to work in the hospital with sick children every day. And no support existed for finding another babysitter, or temporary accommodation, so the hospital was down a pediatrician.
The other pediatrician wasn't available to do a three-week stint. They were also trapped in Adelaide on their well-earned week off.
Meaning that the only major pediatrics ward within a several-hour radius had no pediatricians. They had to shut down and send all urgent cases to Adelaide for the week. To the complete absence of surprise of any of the doctors or nurses; of course this would happen, this was bound to happen, it presumably keeps happening. But probably to the surprise of the higher-ups. After all, the hospital was doing fine, right? Of course all the staff were complaining of overwork and a lack of resources in every meeting, but they could always be fobbed off with the promise of more help sometime in the future; the work was mostly getting done, so the issue couldn't be too urgent.
It's not like some nanny who doesn't even work for the hospital could go out of town for a weekend for the first time in three years, and get the only public pediatrics ward in the area shut down for a week.
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