#you get NO fun stock photo you get a beating

[phregnancy]

Dan’s favorite earrings are Phil’s ankles :-)

IM BEATING YOU WITH A STICK

[writersdrug]

I need, need need neeeeed to know who you would picture bar owner price with 😩 picturing bar owner price has me week in the knees. I need more, how would he be around the bar when he was there? Supporting, bossy,silly? The possibilities are endless. 🥰

I'm loving how people are requesting things for the rest of the 141!!

Bar Owner!Price isn't there every day, and most often not during the actual shift. He's there some mornings, already at his desk on the floor above the pub, setting up the next inventory order and dealing out everyone's tips before Simon climbs down from his flat on the third floor. They both grunt at each other, tired and in need of a hot breakfast and some tea.

He helps set up for the shift - he likes being in the kitchen with Soap. He feels bad the man is back there all by himself, even though he says he doesn't mind it. "I get to cuss 'n bitch all I want back 'ere, sir." Still, Price spends a majority of his time back there with him, prepping burger patties and making sure everything is stocked and ready. Gets on his case about updating the menu, but Soap insists the customers like it the way it is.

Price makes an appearance on the floor every now and then, opting to help run food or bartend on the busier nights. He checks in with the regulars, leaning his forearms on the bar with his sleeves rolled to his elbows, laughing and chatting with them and occasionally offering to refill their drinks. Simon grumbles quietly about him being in the way, but Price doesn't take it to heart.

He doesn't stay late. John isn't that old, but he likes to be back at home by a decent hour. One ruined sleep schedule and he's a shot for the rest of the week. He likes to get back to his flat, make himself a sandwich and pour himself some whiskey, and be on on his sofa and reading his book no later than ten in the evening. Routines have always been a part of his military career, and what can he say? Old habits really fo die hard.

Then you came along.

You didn't just rock Simon's world - you'd gotten Price, too. Though introductions could have been smoother (you nearly beat him with a keg when he came in through the back door and scared you), he's grown fond of you. First, as a hard worker and go-getter; then, as a pretty little waitress with a dazzling smile that likes to keep him on his toes. You love poking fun at him, calling him "bossman" or "barmaster" (doesn't make sense to him, since he's hardly behind the bar - but he finds it cute). You tease him for the way he runs your food, then gets stuck at the table for five minutes just chatting up the customers. You ask him things like, "Who do you prefer, Cardi B or Nicki Minaj?" And laugh when he just stares at you with a furrowed brow. He'll happily let you tease him for being an "old" man just to hear your laughter.

Then Simon sent that photo in the group chat, and Price felt something stir in his chest: looking at you, posing all prettily for your picture, working to push your little idea out there and bring in a crowd. He's impressed, but he's also intrigued. He's got his sights on you, and he's dying to figure out more about his waitress.

"'S the post making any headway?" He asks one night, leaning on the bar next to where you sit. Your tips are finished, money waded into the pocket of your apron as you scroll on your phone, sipping on a screwdriver.

"Kinda..." You mumble, a pout on your face, creasing the skin between your eyebrows. "People are seeing it, and there are a few likes, but no one's really engaging. Not sure if this will do well."

Price hums thoughtfully, looking at your lips while you stare at your screen. He's holding back the urge to lean in and take a whiff of your perfume, afraid it might seem just a bit too strange. "Have you tried promoting it?"

You look at him, laying your phone on the bar top. "Well... I could, but..." You wanted to finish with 'it would cost money'. But then, you'd be insinuating that you expected him to pay you. You could boost the post yourself, but you'd rather not spend money on something that might flop.

"'S there a problem?" Price asked, leaning in closer to you.

"I mean... promoting a post costs some money. Like, for it to be advertised to five hundred people, you'd pay around one fifty. And I think, depending on how far you wanted the post to reach - like, literally, how big of a geographic area - that would cost even more."

Price chuckles. "You do realize how much business you've brought in since you've joined the team, hmm?"

That makes your cheeks warm, pressing your lips into a line to avoid grinning like an idiot at the compliment. "I mean... sure..."

"Go upstairs to the office and get my wallet." he says, standing up from his seat at the bar.

You watch with a stupefied expression as he walks to the POS and prints some blank receipt paper. "You- you mean it? Are you sure?"

He sits on a barstool near the kitchen door. "Wouldn't have said it if I didn't mean it. Hurry up- before I change my mind."

You don't need to be told twice. You drop your phone onto the bar and bolt towards the stairs - you stop yourself, running back to where Price sits and hugging him from behind. He lets out a surprise grunt as you do your best to smother him.

"You're the best boss ever!" you squeal. Then, just like that - you're off to the office upstairs. He preens over the compliment as he hears you leaping two steps at a time.

"Be careful." he calls over his shoulder. He sits there a moment, staring at the paper in front of him. He's surprised he hadn't accidentally thrown you off of him purely out of instinct, but he can't say he isn't absolutely delighted by the hug. It lingers in his mind, his chest still remembering your arms around him. He shakes his head, reaching forward to grab a pen from behind the bar.

His eyes meet Simon's - the man is glaring daggers, his head framed by the window in the kitchen door, mask hanging from his ear. His lips are pulled down into quite possibly the angriest frown Price has ever seen. His nostrils flare as he exhales - Price wonders what sort of insults are flying through the bartender's head right now.

He glares right back. If Simon wants something, he'll give it to him. But he'll make him ask for it, like any normal human being. John isn't going to surrender just because Ghost is huffing and puffing, expecting his boss to back away from you just because he's stomping his foot and looking menacing. But how can he be sure that Simon really wants you, more than he thinks Price deserves you, if the lad won't say anything? It's only reasonable, right?

"If you want something, Simon, say something." Price calls out, never backing down from Simon's jealous gaze.

He huffs again and disappears from the kitchen window. Price can hear shuffling and banging, followed by Soap's irritated voice: "Oi, I got it! Get yourself outta my kitchen n' go your own shite, 'fore you break my stuff."

Price sighs, scribbling down some numbers on the paper in front of him. He'll cave, eventually.

[ofthemorningstars]

The Way We Fit

TerzOmega ~ Smut below the cut 4k words Yes, Omega is much larger than Terzo, with fangs and claws, but Terzo won't let that get in the way of their love. (Size difference k!nk) Based on the character depictions of Terzo and Omega that have been lovingly crafted by @kabukiaku , thank you so much for continuing to allow me to write stories based on your characters, and for giving me guidance and insight along the way! They truly are so special to me, and writing them is always such a fun process!

If you enjoy this story, check out her other socials too! kabukiaku's Ao3 kabukiaku's Ko-fi ---

Terzo checked his phone for what felt like the hundredth time. It had been fifteen minutes since Omega had last responded, and Terzo was getting a little antsy. He had been torturing Omega all day, sending him texts and photos that were at first just suggestive, but eventually became explicit as his excitement grew.

Omega's replies were shy, at first, but slowly got bolder, trying to match Terzo's energy. He was considering sending Omega an even racier photo in the hopes of speeding his arrival along, when he finally heard a key in the door to his chambers. Terzo’s expression twisted into a devilish grin. Today had been a long day; he had been waiting very patiently for Omega to come home. He was in the mood, and he knew just the ghoul for the job.

Terzo arranged himself just so on the bed, leaning back on his elbows with his legs bent at the knee in front of him. He was wearing nothing but sheer black thigh-high stockings and a pair of black lace panties, which he was already straining against. By the time Omega walked into the bedroom, wild eyes widening even further upon seeing Terzo laid out so pretty for him, Terzo felt like his body was on fire. He was itching to be touched.

Terzo didn’t know what had come over him today, but since they woke up that morning, he had felt an insatiable NEED gnawing at him, threatening to eat him alive.

He had wanted to try and satisfy his need that morning, but they had been up all night fooling around the previous night; by the time they finally woke up, Omega had to leave for his ministry obligations, leaving Terzo all alone in his chambers on his day off. He had wanted to drag Omega back to bed, to beg him to stay, but he knew Omega would've done it, for him, and gotten in trouble. He had spent the whole day unable to think about anything other than Omega, and so, feverishly, he decided to make it both of their problem. If he couldn’t have his ghoul now, he would make sure that Omega would be prepared for him later.

Evidently his plan had worked, if the visible bulge in Omega’s pants was to be believed; Terzo’s grin widened.

“Terzo…” Omega croaked out, towering over him, a hand twitching at his side.

“You’re finally home, my darling,” Terzo purred sweetly. He spread his legs, beckoning Omega forward with a curl of his finger. “Come here, big boy.”

Omega practically ripped his mask off in his haste, letting it fall to the floor. Terzo’s heart skipped a beat at the expression on his face, all hunger and yet still full of such tenderness. Sweat had already begun to bead on his brow. His jaw was tense, and his eyes were scanning up and down Terzo’s body, drinking him in.

He approached Terzo slowly, almost reverent as he crouched down on the bed by Terzo’s feet. He moved to kiss Terzo’s calve before looking up at him, eyes questioning. Terzo’s smile softened as he nodded, reaching down to ruffle Omega's soft white hair affectionately.

Omega took one leg in his large hand, stroking up the back of it. He kissed his way from ankle to inner thigh, repeating the process with the other leg. His breath was hot and heavy on Terzo's skin, and Terzo began to squirm loosely in Omega's hold as lips and tongue tickled closer to where he wanted them. By the time Omega's mouth finally pressed a lingering kiss to his bulge, Terzo had begun to sweat as well, electricity coursing through his veins. Terzo grabbed Omega gently under the chin, tilting his face up to make eye contact.

“I want you inside me tonight, amore,” Terzo breathed, wanting to cut right to the chase and make his intentions known. Omega blinked, eyes growing impossibly wider.

“Are you sure, mia luce?” Omega stammered, his grey skin flushing darker. Omega shifted his weight on the bed, rubbing his legs together subtly. It was true that it wasn't their most common bedroom activity; due to their size difference, it was quite taxing on Terzo to have full penetrative sex with Omega. Tonight, though, Terzo was craving Omega as though his life depended on the press of their bodies together.

“Sì. I need you,” Terzo responded as though he’d never been more sure of anything, eyes lidded heavily. He ran a thumb over Omega’s bottom lip, tugging it down gently. Omega swallowed hard before grabbing Terzo’s hand in his own, turning his face into it and kissing Terzo’s palm. Omega staggered to his feet, going to fish a bottle of lubricant from the nightstand. He began to fumble with the lid of the bottle, seemingly forgetting about both of their clothes still being in the way in his haste. Terzo chuckled.

“My my, amore, so impatient,” Terzo tutted, as though he had any room to talk. Omega looked dumbfounded before realizing what he was doing. He hastily set the bottle on the bed, then made as though he were going to remove Terzo’s panties, but Terzo stopped him gently, catching his hand.

“Strip for me?” Terzo asked, voice saccharine as he batted his eyelashes. “Slowly,” he added, almost as an afterthought.

Omega eagerly complied, unbuttoning his shirt with trembling hands. Despite his eagerness, he did his best to take his time for Terzo. As he peeled back his layers, Terzo could see that his poor ghoul’s flush continued from the tips of his ears all the way down to his broad, muscled chest. Terzo nearly drooled at the sight of so much bare skin. After he had discarded his belt, Omega hesitated for the briefest of moments before beginning on his trousers. As he finally freed himself from his underwear, he glanced up at Terzo expectantly. It was Terzo’s turn to rub his thighs together. He inhaled loudly as he bit his lip, staring with open want.

“Mm, my beautiful ghoul is such a big boy,” Terzo crowed, wanting to shower Omega with praise. Omega looked chuffed, preening a little. “Sì. So beautiful… I want to taste.” Terzo’s tongue came out to lick its way up two of his own fingers, putting them fully in his mouth before slowly drawing them out through pursed lips, working to maintain eye contact. Omega’s cock jumped.

“Come play with me.” Terzo’s voice was syrupy, and all the invitation Omega needed to pounce. Omega crossed the room to Terzo before he could blink, and then he was upon him, kneeling again on the bed and pulling urgently at Terzo’s panties. This time Terzo didn’t slow him, wanting to be freed from the suffocating fabric to feel his lover’s touch. Terzo kicked the panties haphazardly across the room once Omega had gotten them down his legs. Omega grabbed him then, touch impatient. Terzo groaned, throwing his head back. He had been craving this all day, but at the rate at which Omega was moving in his enthusiasm, Terzo was worried about their night being cut unceremoniously short.

“S-stop, amore,” Terzo cautioned as Omega was mid-stroke, trying to catch his breath. “You are getting me too riled up,” he quickly added as he felt Omega freeze in an instant. Terzo scratched between Omega’s horns, feeling guilty for worrying him. Omega instantly melted, turning to putty in his hands. He rested his head on Terzo’s hip as he waited for direction, looking up at him with eyes full of adoration. His ragged breath was hot on Terzo’s skin. Terzo tugged gently at Omega’s hair, pulling him up to his face.

“Kiss me,” Terzo whispered. At once Omega’s mouth was on his, hungry and invading in a way that was incredibly welcome. He bit Omega’s lower lip gently, pulling it into his mouth, and Omega moaned. Terzo’s hands floated up to cradle Omega’s face, the pads of his thumbs running along his cheekbones. Throbbing turned to a persistent ache as their tongues danced together, and Terzo didn’t know how much more teasing he could take. Spreading his legs wider, Terzo coaxed Omega into making his way between his thighs. Omega followed his lead, breaking away from the kiss with a soft sound as he got himself into position.

“I need you, Omega,” Terzo reminded him softly, taking Omega in hand and stroking him delicately. Shuddering at his touch, Omega nuzzled the side of Terzo’s face. Terzo searched for where Omega had set the bottle of lube down on the bed before his striptease, wriggling in Omega’s hold to reach it. When he finally got it, he flicked open the cap, slicking the fingers of one hand with a generous amount. He handed the bottle to Omega.

Omega rocked back on his heels, giving both of them space to prepare. Terzo hissed as he slipped a finger into himself, slowly thrusting in and out. When he was comfortable, he added a second, and then, since Omega was so big, a third. Omega slicked his cock as he watched, enraptured, precum beading at his tip. Terzo curled his fingers, massaging, milking himself, enjoying the way Omega’s eyes watched hungrily as precum pooled on Terzo's stomach. Terzo groaned self-indulgently. He was as prepared for Omega's massive size as he could be. At this point, Terzo was just having fun with him.

Terzo withdrew his fingers from himself and beckoned Omega forward. Omega drew closer, reaching behind them to grab a pillow and propping Terzo’s hips up for easier access. Omega caressed Terzo's chest, then stomach.

“Are you ready?” Omega asked in a hushed voice.

“I am,” Terzo replied confidently, sure in his desires.

Terzo thought back to the first time they had done this, the first time that Omega had been inside of him. Omega had been sweating before they even started, trembling with nerves, so worried that he was going to hurt him despite Terzo’s endless reassurances. When he realized how afraid Omega truly was, Terzo had stopped them, cradling his ghoul’s head in his lap and soothing him until he steadied. They had a long talk, then, about boundaries, and how they didn't have to do anything that Omega didn’t want to. About how size wasn’t a factor that Terzo cared about, and how he never wanted it to be something that came between them.

Yes, Omega was twice his size, with beautiful fangs and claws, and in many ways, it was true that their bodies didn’t quite fit together. But they loved each other, and Terzo wouldn't let anything get in the way of expressing that love. Terzo even found those differences quite enticing, something that he had no problem admitting to Omega. When Omega had finally pushed inside of him that night, when they had finally united, it was all either of them could do not to finish far too early.

Terzo closed his eyes for just a moment, grounding himself in the present before he could get lost in sweet nostalgia. Omega moved closer, lining himself up with Terzo’s entrance, too focused on his task to notice that Terzo's mind had been elsewhere. He looked to Terzo for the go-ahead, face flushed, not quite meeting his eyes. Terzo smiled warmly at him, his own face surely a deep shade of pink by now. When Omega gingerly worked his tip inside, Terzo’s eyes rolled back, hissing before letting out a long, low moan as he was stretched. He had been aching for this all day.

“Yes! Oh, you feel so good, amore,” Terzo gasped, desperately aroused, biting his lip and letting his hands float up above him on the bed. Omega slowly pushed inside with a grunt, a look of concentration on his face as he gradually inserted as much of his shaft as he felt comfortable with. He rested, allowing Terzo a moment to adjust to his considerable girth. Terzo attempted to grind down on him anyway, shifting his hips. He was starved for more.

“Nn… deeper,” Terzo moaned breathily. Omega pushed inside just a little further, hesitant. Terzo knew from experience that he was pushing his luck, but he had to try.

“Deeper!” Terzo urged him on, panting.

“I really don’t think–”

“Please, Omega!” Terzo begged greedily, eyes wild and pleading as his chest heaved. Omega grabbed Terzo’s hands up above him, leaning forward, effectively pinning him to the bed. Terzo felt his cock jump at the suggestion of being physically restrained, but Omega's expression was one of concern.

“I don’t want to hurt you, tesoro,” Omega said sternly, voice firm. Terzo met his gaze, Omega's soft eyes boring into him. Terzo felt a twinge of guilt for pushing him too far. Releasing one of Terzo’s hands, Omega propped himself up to lean down to meet Terzo’s lips in a tender kiss, full of unspoken feelings. Terzo kissed him back with a shuddering sigh, his free hand coming up to tangle in Omega’s hair. Their kiss steadied him, and Terzo felt his clawing, overwhelming need calm, just a little. Just enough.

Terzo brought his legs up to wrap around Omega's large frame, locking his ankles. Omega cautiously began to move, slowly at first, but as his confidence grew, so did his momentum. Their breath came out in huffs, twining together. Terzo urged him on with the responsiveness of his body, moving with Omega and encouraging him to pick up both speed and force.

“Aaah, Omega!” Terzo cried, reaching out a hand, wanting to touch, he didn't care where. “You are doing so good, mio caro… so good,” Terzo praised him. Omega shivered, finally allowing himself to relax, surrendering freely to pleasure, beginning to make noises of his own. He hoisted Terzo’s legs further up his body, tucking them under his arms. His large hands wrapped around Terzo’s hips, claws digging as he gripped tight.

Terzo looked down, watching as a bulge in his belly disappeared and reappeared with each thrust, visible proof of his lover filling him. He was so intensely turned on by the sight that he felt lightheaded, balling the sheets up in his fists. When he watched as Omega gave a particularly forceful thrust, he reluctantly made himself tear his eyes away, his worries about cumming prematurely becoming a little too real.

An idea came to Terzo then, one that was too enticing to pass up. Terzo wanted to catch Omega up to where he was, in the hopes that they could finish together. Terzo felt around the bed blindly, looking for the discarded bottle. Finding his prize, Terzo asked for Omega's tail, stroking it lovingly, sensually, when it was presented to him. Omega to let out a shuddering moan. Terzo brought the narrow spaded tip to his lips, planting a kiss on its apex.

“Would you play with yourself for me?” Terzo murmured against Omega's skin. Omega whimpered, nodding emphatically, looking excited. Terzo lubed up the end of Omega's tail, taking his time, perhaps teasing him a bit more than was necessary. When Terzo finally released him, Omega allowed the tip of his tail to snake around behind him, penetrating himself. He pushed inside just enough to brush against his own prostate, letting out the most beautiful sigh.

Terzo tightened his thighs around Omega, wanting to get as close to him as possible. He wanted to touch Omega, to run his hands and his mouth all along his body, but in their current position, he couldn’t. Terzo whined, writhing under the ghoul. He was nearing his limit, pleasure building deliciously at the base of his spine. His hips moved in time with Omega’s motions, and he was overcome with a desire to ride Omega, to bounce and grind and control the speed and depth on his own. He would have to talk to Omega about letting them try that for a future encounter…

“Omega… I want you to cum inside me, amore… Please...” Terzo panted before repeating Omega’s name. He knew his dirty talk always made Omega weak, and he needed him to buckle before he lost his own grip on his control. Omega huffed through his nose, concentrating and picking up speed. Terzo began to drool, head thrown back in ecstasy, his speech turning into incoherent babbling.

Omega tightened his grip on Terzo’s hips, moving inside of Terzo and playing with himself all the while. Omega began to whimper, and Terzo could tell he was close. Unable to speak, he began to moan loudly, wanting to spur Omega on. It was working. Omega bucked hard, trying to restrain himself in order to protect Terzo, to not bury the entirety of his girthy length within him, but he was visibly struggling with his composure.

“Terzo…” Omega hissed out through gritted teeth, desperation in his voice. Omega reached out and grabbed Terzo’s cock, working him furiously. Terzo shouted at the added stimulation, back arching off the bed. He tried to hold on for as long as he could, but this was a battle he couldn’t win. It was an unspoken game between them, to see who could make the other climax first; neither of them wanted to finish before the other was satisfied, but inevitably, someone had to lose.

Tonight’s loser proved to be Terzo. He came with an agonizing wail as orgasm tore through him, his release painting hot streaks across his heaving chest. Pleasure washed over him for what felt like a blissful eternity. As he began to come down, Terzo bit his lip against a whine as Omega continued to move inside of him, overstimulated but needing with everything in him to let Omega finish.

“Omega..” Terzo whispered over and over like a prayer. “Please… Cum in me, Omega, I need you,” More dirty talk. He knew exactly how to push Omega’s buttons, how to overwhelm his senses. Omega lost it then, his cock kicking inside of Terzo as he came with a guttural groan, the dam finally breaking. His seed spilled out of Terzo, dripping onto the sheets.

As Omega braced himself with trembling arms on either side of Terzo’s head, sweaty and winded and struggling for air, Terzo felt an overpowering warmth and affection bloom through his chest. He wanted to cradle Omega in his arms, to stroke his hair and smother him with kisses, but in his current position he settled for reaching up to cup his jaw. Omega leaned into his touch.

Omega pulled out of Terzo slowly, carefully. Terzo mourned the loss. Standing on unsteady legs, Omega briefly left to get a towel, ever the gentleman, and helped Terzo clean up. Terzo silently wished that he would just leave it be for the moment and stay within his reach, free to touch, but he appreciated the gesture nonetheless. When Omega settled down beside him it wasn’t a moment too soon, and Terzo descended upon him immediately, caressing and kissing and quietly singing praises. His hands and mouth explored Omega’s face and body, touch insistent, making up for all of the contact he couldn’t indulge in while they were in their previous position. Omega chuckled, reveling in the attention he was being showered with.

“Feeling better now, Papa?” Omega teased. He reached for Terzo, coaxing him back up to his level, stealing a kiss himself. “For a minute there I forgot which one of us was the demon,” Omega joked. Terzo cringed, feeling guilty.

“Sì. I am so sorry, my darling. I guess I did get a little out of control,” Terzo said, remorseful over the prospect of having perturbed Omega. “I am sorry for being such a menace.” Omega’s smile widened, and he took another kiss, making sure to take his time.

“What are you apologizing for, mia luce?” he asked against Terzo’s lips. “I don’t think I’ve ever been so turned on in my life.” Another kiss, this time with plenty of tongue. Terzo felt a spark of arousal race through him, though his body was too tired to follow through with it. He groaned into Omega’s mouth.

“Mio amato monstro…” Terzo breathed against Omega’s cheek when they broke apart. Omega started trailing languid kisses down Terzo’s neck, his chest. “I shouldn’t have distracted you while you were working. I don’t want to get you in trouble,” he continued, genuinely repentant.

“Worth it,” Omega stated simply, shrugging. They continued trading lazy kisses and lingering touches until Omega decided that they needed to get ready for bed.

“It’s getting late, tesoro,” Omega said reluctantly, pushing up on one elbow.

“It’s not that late yet,” Terzo scoffed, wanting to continue to bask in the afterglow that they’d been indulging in together for quite some time.

“Maybe not, but we still have to clean up and eat. We both have to work tomorrow, it’s Sunday,” Omega reminded him. Terzo grimaced. “I don’t want you giving another half-asleep sermon. Sister Imperator really chewed you out the last time that happened.” Terzo rolled his eyes, remembering the talking-to he’d had to sit through the last time that he and Omega had fucked away a Saturday night.

“Hm. Maybe you’re right,” Terzo conceded. He grimaced as he sat up. “Let us take a bath first.” He went to stand, not realizing how weak his legs felt until they started to give out under him. Omega lunged to catch him, pulling him back to sit on the edge of the bed. Terzo chuckled, trying to play it off. He made to stand again, batting Omega away when he tried to help, but Omega was having none of it and scooped him up in his arms.

Terzo started to protest, indignant at being carried like a child, but soon relaxed at Omega’s warmth and the scent of his skin. He knew Omega just wanted to help, that he wasn’t looking down on him. Terzo sighed. Tonight was not the night to be stubborn, he was far too worn out for that.

Omega carefully sat Terzo down on the edge of the tub and began preparing a bath. He kissed Terzo on the crown of his head and left to change their bedsheets while the water ran. Terzo felt lonelier than he usually did in Omega’s absence. When the bath was ready and Omega had returned, they slipped into the water together. They made quick work of washing each other, wanting to get to their favorite part: relaxing. Terzo sat firmly between Omega’s legs, his back to Omega’s chest, Omega’s arms wrapped loosely around him. Terzo hummed to Omega softly, and Omega’s tail came up to wrap around Terzo’s leg.

Terzo grabbed one of Omega’s hands in his own, examining it. His was tiny in comparison. If they were to try and lock their fingers together, to hold hands in the traditional way, they wouldn’t quite fit right. They were frequently having to come up with creative ways to get around their difference in size, but that never bothered Terzo. He and Omega would do anything to fit together. To complement each other.

Terzo pressed his face into Omega’s hand with a sigh, leaning into it. He kissed Omega’s palm, and then up each of his fingers, slowly, deliberately. When his tongue came out to taste Omega’s skin, Terzo couldn’t help but rub his thighs together. He felt Omega’s cock twitch at his back.

“Don’t go getting yourself all worked up again, tesoro,” Omega chuckled breathily, his tone playful. “We need to actually sleep tonight.”

“Do we?” Terzo asked idly, stroking Omega’s arm. “I think I can handle a little tongue-lashing just fine. Surprisingly well, actually,” he quipped as Omega’s other hand began to glide its way down Terzo’s body. Terzo tilted his face up, lips seeking and being quickly met. It was an awkward kiss, truthfully, upside down and wet. Terzo wouldn’t have traded it for the world. When it broke, Terzo spun in his hold, straddling Omega’s lap instead.

No, maybe they didn’t always fit together perfectly, but they wouldn’t have it any other way.

[cosmicstarlatte]

Devil-Mart ⭐ (Obey Me!)

━━━━━━━━━━ ✦ ━━━━━━━━━━

You got hired at mega retailer, Devil-Mart⭐. Naturally, the guys "suddenly" need a job too and start working alongside you.

»Characters: Demon Bros + Bonus Dia and Barb

»Tags: Humor, Bulleted Style fic, Gender Neutral Reader/MC

»Notes: How about shopping with them?-> [Devil-Mart: Shopping]

Lucifer:

"...Mammon put us in debt this month."

Was worried you'd be bullied (or eaten) surrounded by demons/other monsters

Is that coworker who acts like a boss

Actually does make it to management within the first week

The customer isn't always right. He's the manager to call for rude customers

Actually likes stocking, finds neat aisles soothing

The home improvement dept is his favorite

Frequently makes sure you take all your breaks

Doubles as store security if needed

Mammon:

"I just needed extra cash alright?"

Was worried you'd fall for some other demon

Failed in all departments except online orders (he's very fast!)

Bags for orders would occasionally go missing

Took extra long breaks but Lucifer caught on and wrote him up

Would try to frequently visit you in your department

Started fights with other workers who were busier staring at you than their work

"They're not meat, beat it!"

Got fired for trying to steal electronics

Levi:

"Theres a lot of new merch releases coming up soon!"

Didn't want to be the only one left out so he applied...plus you won't see him anymore!

Electronics department ONLY

You won't find him cross trained anywhere else, he refuses

Is actually really good with upselling

Can be aggressive if you don't go with his recommendations

Has received a few complaints for that reason

Tries to match his breaks with you since that's the only time he really gets to see you

Was the one who tattled on Mammon

Satan:

"This is for research."

A lie he almost believes but knows he just wants to be near you

Works the same department as you so you see each other all day

Never put him on registers or customer service

Almost got into a fight on the first day

Retail is rough for him but he does it for you

Complains to Demon Resources about Lucifer daily

Asmo:

"Ugh...a job!? I'm gonna cry. Oh but my fans would love if I relate to them! And your job will be fun with me there!"

Upfront about his reason lol

Refused to do anything except customer service

Just stands back and talks to customers while the coworker alongside him completes any transactions

Makes DevilToks on the clock

Frequently leaves his spot to talk to you and Satan

Gets all the work gossip

Lucifer never catches on

"You know, this isn't so bad! I'm such a good worker right!?"

Gets employee of the month

Beel:

"I don't like the thought of you surrounded by demons alone. This isn't RAD."

Aalajffkslsjda the cutest honest protector

Is cross trained everywhere but

Never put him near grocery ever again

Likes to work with you if he gets the chance

Usually works in the backroom unloading and back stocking things

Has a doctors note that let's him take frequent breaks for eating

His favorite department overall is security because Lucifer gives him extra treats if he prevents high valued thefts

Belphie:

"I'm here because I have things I would like to have."

Is there an extra meaning to that?

Works in the back with Beel usually

Takes frequent naps in hidden areas of the backroom

Pretends to look busy if Lucifer is around

Also complains to Demon Resources about Lucifer daily

Fights with Levi on your breaks because he also wants to spend time with you when he can

Is the reason some coworkers don't approach you

He makes it known to not fuck with you

Diavolo heard you started a new job alongside the brothers! He goes to visit with Barbatos in tow.

Diavolo:

"Can I get a little help here?"

Flirts with you while on the clock. He thinks the red vest on you is cute!

Was wowed by the store in general

(Normally Barbatos does the shopping alone)

Liked sampling the food that was around the store

Was tempted to apply but Barbatos shut it down

Took a photo of Lucifer in his manager clothes

Barbatos:

"Seeing you here will make my shopping trips more enjoyable."

Praises your work

Did have to go to customer service to complain and ran into Asmo

Didn't believe Asmo was gonna clean the restrooms but at least the complaint was taken

Takes a survey and compliments you

Has to fight Dia to get him off the racecar cart

"It's for parents with children my lord."

Returns the cart to the cart corral like an upstanding citizen

My first bulleted story post lol. I had fun with this & hope to make more in the future. <3

⬦You might also like: Coconut︱Mexican Restaurant︱Waffle House︱You ARE The Father

[blueberrypancakesworld]

Your words in my mouth - TBOSAS

Sejanus Plinth x fem!professor-reader

warning : +18, smut, little emotional, angst, crying, handjob, praise/mommy-kink, power abuse, mommy issues

Summary : She was his literature professor and he was her student. His thoughts were shameful and inappropriate. And yet he couldn't help himself until the house of cards collapsed when she suddenly let his thoughts out to the class. A conversation would be unforgettable, a conversation with unexpected consequences.

Info : So this is a elaborates idea from me and with the amazing mind of @tinfairies who I rode this also for (besides myself and all you simps). So have fun reading with little Sejanus and I see you in the next work ;)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Literature was his favorite subject, not because he was so eloquent or needed that extra good grade. No, his dark eyes were on her all the time. His professor. The young professor in the prime of her life had a husband at home and a small child to look after.

She had her job and her classes to teach and supervise. The last thing on her mind was him, he was sure of that. But she was everything to him.

Ever since he had seen her from the first day he had been torn away from his district, had sought help in his mother's arms, had retreated to his room in shame and looked at the photo of his professor, he couldn't get her out of his mind.

The red dress on her body with the black buttons and the leather gloves in the same dark color. It was the normal outfit of the professors and yet he couldn't take his eyes off it.

The way her clothes always seemed to be a size too small, the buttons worn out, the shapely hips supported by the belt she wore from time to time. The stockings he was sure were on her legs when she bent over and, of course, dropped a pencil right at that moment.

It took him every effort to keep the book on his hard center. He tensed up when he saw that she seemed to be wearing a thong next to the black fabric of her knee socks, he was sure.

She did everything just for him. And if he couldn't stand it, his hand had already wandered under his waistband as he fled to the toilet and tried to hold back his noise.

He felt miserable when he came, the thick cum covering his hand almost soiled himself and he often walked around with a jacket to cover his shame.

He wrote down his thoughts about her at night, trying to hold back the excited noises while his imagination ran wild in his head. Her look, her behavior, her touch, her body, her care. He would be good for her, he certainly would.

Until the day he learned that underneath his caring, almost maternal professor was something else entirely. ,,I would like to read one more piece of work because of the time, the rest you could send me at the end of the week," she said and the students in the red uniforms put away their pencils and books.

The woman was proud of her course, many future poets could become from the students, but her gaze rested knowingly on Sejanus' for a moment and she couldn't help smiling before she took the papers and placed them on her desk. ,,The assignment is from Sejanus Plinth," she announced and as always there was more or less euphoric clapping for anyone brave enough to submit theirs. But instead of pride and joy, he was filled with sheer fear.

He had submitted nothing, neither a word nor a sentence. But his heart skipped a beat when he looked in his shoulder bag and saw that his notebook was no longer there. He felt awful, nervous and excited.

A fact he could not deny as the heat rose to his ears and cheeks. She would read it out, there was no doubt about it, but if he stood up now and made a scene it would only get worse.

,,Every day I lay my eyes on you. See exactly how the red on your body nestles, wishing it were my hands that embraced you. Exploring you like he is allowed to do every day...but not me. I look after you at night thinking of the day when you walked around. Your smile to me when you bend down to me I can see in your silhouette. You never wear a bra and yet I know that you only do it for me. That at night it is you who touches me you would love me and love me. I would be better than him I would be good for you I would give myself up just to be touched by you. So I ask you one chance my beloved one chance only and I am yours forever just let me be good for you" she said and would have turned another page to reveal his fantasies had the bell not rung and the students stood up.

Sejanus released the breath he had been holding and looked nervously at his friend Coryo, giving him an indefinable look. ,,Thank you as always, I'll see you next week. Sejanus would you please stay a moment," she said and he almost flinched as he practically tried to escape from the room.

The red masses of students moved past him and he turned to her, closing the door of the hall, his footsteps echoing as he came to a halt in front of it. His bag slipped from his shoulder and slid to the floor as their eyes met. ,,Do you realize what that means?" she asked, her voice full of sternness, a tone he had rarely heard.

He secretly wished that she would treat him harshly only to praise him afterwards. ,,What does it mean? Mr. Plinth!" she called his name he lowered his gaze feeling his heart beat rapidly as his lower lip began to tremble he slowly but surely realized how stupid he was.

His vision blurred slightly as tears of helplessness formed in his eyes. ,,I-I Miss...I'm sorry," he mumbled powerlessly, afraid that if he spoke louder his voice would break. He saw her tilt her head slightly for a moment and sigh in disappointment before, to his amazement, she used her hand to play with his black curls.

,,You stupid boy" she said, he saw the smirk on her lips as she gently pulled him closer to her, he obeyed it was only natural that he tried everything to please her. ,,I'm sorry Ma'm" he said again hope resonating in his voice as he slowly cuddled up to her watching her but she let him.

Making him understand that it was all right. ,,Tell me, Sejanus, do you really want to go under my desk while I teach you, ride you, call you my good boy...do you want me to be your mommy?" she asked, hearing him whimper in shame as she read his fantasies from the book. It was enough when she stroked his cheek that the tears of shame flowed down his cheeks and she cared for him.

,,Don't cry, you're making a fool of yourself...here, let me help you. A good boy with such desires must be rewarded," she whispered to him, hearing his surprised gasp as her hand moved under the waistband of his pants and began to stroke his cock.

,,Yes-yes I will-please Mommy be good," came breathlessly from him as he closed his eyes and her other hand pulled at his curls every now and then, grinning as he whimpered and jerked his hips and she ran her thumb over the tip of his cock.

,,Ohh I know you'll be good my stupid stupid boy" she joked and let go of his hair before running her thumb over his soft lips, tracing them and making a satisfied sound as he started to suck her finger on his own, showing her how good he would be if she had him on her knees.

,,So eager," she heard his muffled assent, the muffled moans and whimpers, the tear-streaked look, the danger of another one getting inside. But when she pressed her fingers further down his throat, making him gag and squeezing his balls, he let out an angelic protest.

,,I-I no mommy I was good" he cried not understanding the look before she leaned forward and took her fingers out of his mouth and his spit mixed with the tears before she licked her fingers clean. His cock twitched and she heard the slight squeeze of his balls and the pathetic groan of her nickname.

,,Good? I'll let you come you crybaby if I get to see your pretty little ideas from now on," she suggested and took her hand off his cock. Saw how it tore him out of the whole moment and he almost threw himself against her, his lips kissing her hand again, not daring to kiss her.

He again threatened him with tears, ,,Yes of course of course you may Ma'm I'll give you anything you want...just please please let me come" he said hastily and she smiled as she stroked his cheek. Wiped away his tears and gave him a kiss, her hand wandering back into his pants.

He kept up the fast, steady pace, almost threatening to topple over as he tried to hold back. Not to touch her for too long as she had not yet allowed him to.

Her lips kissed him again, his voice and sounds drowned in the kiss. She broke away and said a simple, ,,Come for Mommy," his throaty gasp echoing through the hall as he poured himself into her hand.

Breathing heavily, she supported him for a moment before taking her hand off him, carelessly wiping his cum on his red skirt, tousling his hair and gathering her eyes. ,,Was I...was I good?" he asked as he opened his eyes again, not yet seeing his fucked image until he saw himself in the toilet mirror with embarrassed shame and arousal.

,,You were a good boy for me, Sejanus," the older girl replied, giving him one last kiss on the forehead and watching his hand reach out for her before she broke away from him, the grin never leaving her lips. Knowing full well that she had her stupid boy in her hands.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

taglist : @tinfairies , @amasochistsdeath , @solosallyourfavs , @cherrygummycandy , @meadowscollectivelight

[aita-blorbos]

( 🍤 for tracking purposes. And this is a different POV from an earlier situation.)

Am I the jerk for confronting a shopkeeper over his scummy business practices?

Ugh. Can’t believe I’m doing this. But I’m hiding out from some monsters right now, and it’s better than doing nothing.

I (M, idk and idc. Young I guess?) used to be a part of this dumb kids show. I only participated because I was bored. Not because I wanted to teach kids or anything. Teaching lessons is so boring!!! Where was I going with this? Oh yeah. I had to work with my fellow toons and interact with kids and stuff. And I’m sure you can tell how I felt towards them all.

To tell you the truth, I actually liked it when people stopped showing up at our home, cuz’ then I didn’t have to be a part of the show anymore. The only problem was when toons started going crazy for no apparent reason. We called these guys Twisteds (this is relevant later.)

Out of all the toons, the one I probably dislike the most would be D (M, don’t care. 5 or 6?) D runs a supply shop which is all fun and dandy, but I noticed that he rarely had good stuff for sale. Just useless junk food and cheap trinkets.

It didn’t help that he only accepted VHS tapes. Those things are hard to get, man! And his prices were seriously inflated. After the umpteenth time of getting tapes just to find he had nothing good in stock, I knew something had to be done.

So as any rational toon would, I snuck into the back of D’s shop when he went on a scavenging mission. If he thinks he’s gonna get ME to work my butt off just to buy some junk he thought wrong! Anyways, I start ‘borrowing’ his extra tapes (he had boxes and boxes of the things!) when D shows up again.

He starts YELLING at me to drop the tapes, to which I said no. I told him that he was saving all of the good items for himself, and that his prices were unfair. I wish I could have taken a photo of his face!! The smug, proud D pushed off of his high horse. If I didn’t do it, then surely someone else would eventually.

Dangit. Going on a side tangent again. So I was messing with D, and he kept trying to snatch the tape out of my hand.

To further tease him (as “friends” do), I push a shelf, causing a big box to fall over. Surprise surprise, it’s full of tapes. But D stopped going after me at that point. He just. Froze. And kneeled down by the box of spilled tapes. As the others enter the room to see what the heck is going on, I’m briefly considering if what I did was too much.

That consideration was short lived, as D freaking twisted in front of our eyes!! Twisted? Twist-ified? I dunno!! But he turned into a monster, and beat the stuffing outta me!! This one girl and these twins who I tolerate (F, and both M. They’re both like 5) managed to calm D down, before another guy knocked him out. But not before me, and a few others, were seriously injured. Who knew an angry flower could pack such a punch?!

…I didn’t stick around much longer, especially when D started waking up. Everyone was glaring at me and refusing to even come near, so I knew I wasn’t welcome anymore. Fine by me. I never liked them anyways, and it didn’t help that they all took D’s side. I’ve been wandering the lower levels of our home in search of a place to stay, and now you’re all caught up. So am I really the jerk for messing with D in the first place? I still think he could have run his shop better.

Edit: quit asking what floor im on its not like im gonna tell you. Its also gotten hard to type so no nore edits

Edit 2: MY MOUGTH IS GON WHWRE IS MY MOUTH

[usedtobethelegendcreator]

I don’t usually post about Reddit, but I need to rant about this.

So. There are people talking about minor DNIs, stuff like that. I reply, wondering why people think no one under the age of 18 has ever had a single sexual thought ever. I say that as a 17 year old—technically a minor, sure. I’m the age of consent where I live.

I get into a little argument with someone who starts talking about grooming, corn addiction, etc, when what I said had nothing to do with that. Like. Just because I want to read about omegaverse werewolves breaking barriers doesn’t mean I have an addiction. After some back and forth, I block the person I’m arguing with and go on with my day.

Then Reddit perma-bans me, because apparently someone reported me.

I look at the message. It says I was banned for “spreading cornographic content of a minor”.

That. That was me. The minor in the content was me being a silly little gal, having a grand ol time. You can probably imagine what happy lil game I was playing. Yeah. I didn’t want to bring it up either, but here we are.

Long story short, I got banned for being *checks notes* about six months away from 18 and horny. Proving my goddamn point there, Reddit. “OH NO THIS REDDITOR IS BEING HORNYYYY” so what? Fork found in kitchen. I’m not waiting another six months to have fun. “NONE OF THIS ACTION WAS AUTOMATED WE CHECKED THIS PERSONALLY” oh really. Really. Do they think I’m secretly a MeatCanyaon-esque greasy 42-year-old man caricature sitting in a beat-up leather chair, rubbing my sweaty little hands together?

If I have to prove my identity with a face reveal, I ain’t no coward. Try me. I have what is likely the least memorable face in human history. I could be used in generic stock photos.

I’m just…ugh. Again. Fork found in kitchen.

[discrunkled-twog]

Hello there! Either you've already watched the video, or you're planning to, but I thank you for taking the time to explore it at all.

Welcome to Psychomachia! It's a working title, but what we're using for now. The project was made during the making of this video, which is why it isn't mentioned.

This project sprouted on Sep 20, 2022. Since then, Aspen and I have been shooting ideas back and forth, experimenting with music, and exchanging varying media of character design, if that makes sense.

Here are the character sheets, if you'd like to get a better look at them. https://docs.google.com/document/d/11H8oL_xQPn06hSjIWRQRLTiVakg1Crejn02n_Gu31uE/edit?usp=sharing

In the afterlife, if you're an angel, you can choose from a few career paths; you can guard people and protect them from harm in times of need, you can take quick jobs "possessing" them to do something extraordinary, or you can take up a lifelong contract to watch over them and try to shape them into the best person they can be!

If you're a demon, you can guide people during times of need as well— to worse things. And you can possess them, but this is rarely taken seriously, so demons usually just have fun with this. AND you can take up a lifelong contract trying to get people to be the crappiest person they can be!

With the demons' focus on population control, they're constantly opposing the angels, whose goal is the exact opposite. That's why nobody ever thought that a demon and an angel could be in a relationship, let alone have a child. Stories— cautionary tales are told to children about the horrific creature this would unleash upon the world, but then it happened.

And when that child comes of age, how in the entire heck is he supposed to be employable?

If that sounds of interest to you, you can contact either me or Aspen in one of the places shown below, if the video passed you too fast.

Twig

Email: ironspleen3@gmail.com

Newgrounds: https://disgruntled-twig.newgrounds.com/

Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/discrunkled-twog

Aspen

Newgrounds: https://aspen67.newgrounds.com/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/dreaming__aspen

Music (In Order)

Elder Kettle/ Kristopher Madigan

Beat One/ Aspen67

Spider Dance (Electro Swing Remix)/ A-Bit Ape

Woe Is Me!/ Levent & Bernie (Spongebob Soundtrack)

HEY EVERY !/ Toby Fox (Deltarune OST)

Carnival/ Sound Carousel (YouCut Music Library)

sans./ Toby Fox (UNDERTALE OST)

Stars And Games/ Larry Robbins (Spongebob Soundtrack)

Gifs and graphics were taken from the YouCut library. Additional graphics were taken from stock photos, clipart, or drawn. I believe it's safe to assume that this information is irrelevant to most of those who will see it.

Character sheets were done by the incredible Aspen67 on Newgrounds. Used with direct permission. All rights reserved. :)

Video editing done by. Me.

"The Simpsons" clip is taken from S1E2, "Bart The Genius," from January 14, 1990. Wowza! Another fun fact, "The Simpsons" is one of the oldest running shows of all time, coming in at 34 years and counting!

Hope to see you soon. :)

[adultswim2021]

Assy McGee #20: “Squirrels” | July 07, 2008 - 12:30AM | S02E14

Assy ends tonight. In this one, Assy breaks up an underground Squirrel Fighting Ring after getting over his intense fear of squirrels. He in fact conquers his fears to such an extent that the climax of the episode (and the series, as it turns out) is him squaring off with a giant, genetically modified squirrel. 

On the way we get a hunting trip where Assy browbeats Sanchez into drinking duck piss, a shirtless chief, covered in tats, and a few things that actually made me laugh a little. Assy somberly telling Sanchez “I love killing birds,” the dumb exchange between Sanchez and the Chief after Sanchez sees a framed photo of him playing Twister with Gerald Ford: (Sanchez: “Is that you with President Ford?” Chief: “Yeah, that’s me!”), the part where Assy is so spooked at the sight of the squirrel carcasses in the flophouse that his buttcheeks begin quivering. It probably doesn’t sound incredible, but there’s more than usual to like in this episode. 

I did not watch Assy McGee season two at all when it premiered (I think; if I contradicted something I already said, go with the other thing). In 2008, I was probably still a touch adverse to comedy involving squirrels. There was a rotating list of nouns that whenever I heard them used in supposed-to-be-funny dialogue or visuals it would set me off. I called them “stock absurdities”, and they’d force me to sit on my hands and scowl in response. I probably arrogantly dressed down many children who were simply trying to have a fun time online.

Now that I’m a 40 year old man (in a few weeks, yikes), I can admit I was a bit of a handful who took his own posts way too seriously. I probably wasn't even all that funny. But at the time, maaaaybe I had a point? It seemed like people could very easily garner laughs by just mentioning monkeys, squirrels, cheese, pirates, ninjas, or robots. I’m sure I’ve harped on this already on this blog, so I’ll stop, abruptly. 

This concludes my coverage of Assy McGee, which should not have had 20 episodes. I did just do a quick-and-dirty list of my top ten. If you are good at math, you’ll realize that this is half of the series. Some of these aren’t that good, but had enough memorable jokes that they made the cut. I’m not sure how to rank these, but I’ll tell you the strongest episode on the list is “The Flirty Black Man”, and the weakest is “Irish Wake”: 

S01E01: Murder by the Docks

S01E02: The Flirty Black Man

S01E04: Busted

S01E06: Conviction

S02E02: Pharmassy

S02E03: Mile High Mayhem

S02E06: Irish Wake

S02E07: Vowel Play

S02E08: Hands Up

S02E14: Squirrels

As you can see, Assy joins Twin Peaks in the pantheon of shows where season two falls off dramatically, but comes back strong towards the end. "strong", I says. RIP Assy. For better or for worse, I was the only one who truly understood you.

MAIL BAG

Do you think you could beat a kangaroo in a fight should it come to that (your allowed to lie) also the kangaroo is dressed up as space ghost

I would have serious trouble fighting my hero Space Ghost Coast to Coast, but, no, those things are vicious and I am not strong at all and I'm also very scared all the time. It would be a little comforting if the kangaroo delivered the monologue from the end of "Banjo", but I just found out that kangaroos can't speak English, which is sobering to say the least.

EPHEMERA CORNER

[lighthousenewsnetwork]

Since Elon Musk can’t tell a joke to save his life, he is now trying to acquire more fame by doing things only a C-list celebrity would do to try to get back on top and be loved again. He’s going to try and beat up another techno nerd who also wants publicity to be a “good guy” again. Billionaires don’t like to be criticized by the poor, after all, so it’s time for them to beat each other up! Mark Zuckerberg, the founder of Facebook, is ready to take on Elon in an octagon cage match, where they will both put on the gloves, hike up their satin shorts, and do a little Mohammad Ali dancing in the ring, to see which computer geek is the GREATEST!! Seriously? Have you ever watched two nerds fight? Hilarious. First, they have to take out their pocket protectors and calculators and Dungeons and Dragons maps and creased photos of the high school cheerleaders who called them nerds and made fun of their Adam’s apples … and then finally, they fight. One throws a punch … and hurts his hand. Five-minute break, doctors in the corners of the ring checking the “fighters”, and lawyers are on phones waiting to sue (these are billionaire nerds, after all). Once they drink plenty of fluids so as not to get too dehydrated, check for nose bleeds and popped zits, they wobble on their oversized shoes again and trudge out into centre ring. Elon swings a punch and hits himself in the side of the head! Almost a K-O! Mark swings a hard left and it just keeps swinging and spinning until his feet leave the ground – and Mark has dropped himself to the mat beside Elon, who’s rubbing his sore ear and sniffling and thinking about building bigger and bigger rockets to take him farther away from his many Earth-bound enemies – to the moon, Alice! Both fighters are down! The ref wants to call it, but he can’t stop laughing! The audience is also laughing their asses off as Elon and Mark struggle up the ropes, pulling against their rubber legs and all that sweet laughter. They are both sweating heavily, and snot is running out of their nostrils – and Mark has just taken his inhaler! There will be a ten-minute break while bruises and scrapes are heavily bandaged to make these “warriors” look impressive to the TV cameras. Is anyone watching? Do we want this to go on? My stomach already hurts, and I’ve been farting as I laugh so I’ll take a bathroom break and come back to see if … wait, what’s this? The fight is over! No winner! No one is getting sued. Elon and Mark are both crying and their moms are on the phones pissed off and telling them to get home immediately, their dinners are getting cold – and their stock has plummeted! And there you have it, another publicity stunt gone wrong. Now if only Fox could create a show where computer billionaires fought tigers! Can’t sue a tiger, Elon and Mark. PS: the cheerleaders are still laughing at both of you looooooooosers! https://lighthousenewsnetwork.com/when-two-nerds-go-to-war-moms-get-mad-and-cheerleaders-laugh/?feed_id=8054&_unique_id=673f5d19b4ee9

[feetpiclovers]

Got a foot fetish? Course you do, we all do. But where to get your fix? You’ve heard of Fun with Feet. Sounds legit, right? Well, hold your horses, cowboy, because many have raised the question “Is Fun With Feet a real site?” ‘cause that site’s about as real as pixie dust.

Turns out it’s run by a bunch of scammers out to swipe your hard-earned cash and the leader of this fake website is Rajdeep Dosanjh who doesn’t have even the faintest idea about the foot fetish world.

Meanwhile, FeetFinder is the true blue deal, connecting foot models with fans since 2019. Their verification process ensures every pair of piggies is legit. So skip the fakes and get your sole satisfaction from the pros at FeetFinder. With rates starting at just $5 a pic, you can’t beat the real feet at real prices. Leave “Fun with Feet” for the rip-off artists and have some real fun with the piggies at FeetFinder.

What Is Fun With Feet?- Is Fun With Feet a Real Site? So you stumbled upon FunWithFeet.com and thought you hit the jackpot. Before you start uploading pics of your precious piggies, know this: the answer to the most commonly surfed question “ Is fun with feet a real site” is a big yes.

Fun With Feet claims to be “the premier social network for foot models.” Right. The only thing premier about it is that it’s a premier scam. Some quick research shows the site’s contact info leads to nowhere, the photos are all stock images, and their “verified foot models” don’t exist.

Instead of wasting time on Fun With Feet, head to FeetFinder. Unlike other poseur sites, FeetFinder is the real McCoy. They’ve been connecting foot models and their admirers for many years. Their screening process ensures all members are over 18 and to check this they ask users to submit a government ID and a selfie with it, to avoid fake profiles and encourage genuine community. In short, the site actively works to prevent fraud.

You might wonder why FeetFinder succeeds where others fail. Here’s why: they understand feet. FeetFinder was founded by foot models and foot photographers who have a deep understanding of foot fetish and who recognize that feet can be a source of attraction. They built the site to cater to this specialized interest ethically.

The bottom line: if to sell feet pics for cash is your goal, stick with FeetFinder. They’ve got the experience, knowledge, and integrity to help launch your career as a foot model. Fun With Feet, on the other hand, has nothing but stock photos and broken links – and that’s no fun at all.

[readitreviewit]

The Wok: The Definitive Guide to Cooking with the Most Versatile Pan in Your Kitchen by J. Kenji López-Alt is a fantastic addition to any home cook's collection. With over 200 recipes and more than 1,000 full-color photographs, this cookbook is perfect for those who love to experiment with different cuisines. López-Alt, the author of the best-selling cookbook The Food Lab, is known for his science-based approach to cooking. In The Wok, he applies this method to the wok, the most versatile pan in the kitchen. Whether you're stir-frying, deep frying, steaming, simmering, or braising, López-Alt shows you how to get the most out of your wok. The first section of the book covers the basics, including the mechanics of stir-frying and how to get that sought-after smoky wok hei (flavor) at home. Once you've mastered these techniques, López-Alt takes you on a culinary journey across Asia and the United States. The recipes include everything from Kung Pao Chicken and Pad Thai to San Francisco–Style Garlic Noodles and Beef Chow Fun. But that's just the beginning. López-Alt breaks down the science behind other dishes, including fried rice, dumplings, tempura vegetables or seafood, and dashi-simmered dishes. He also includes simple no-cook sides, along with explanations of knife skills and how to stock your pantry. What sets this cookbook apart from others is López-Alt's attention to detail. For example, he includes a recipe for dashi, a Japanese stock made from kelp and bonito flakes, which is a key ingredient in many Japanese recipes. He also shows you how to make your own chili oil, which can be used in a range of dishes. The photographs in The Wok are stunning. Every recipe is accompanied by a full-color photo that shows you exactly what the finished dish should look like. In addition, López-Alt provides step-by-step photos for some of the more complicated dishes, such as dumplings and scallion pancakes. One of the standout features of The Wok is the thermal imaging photographs. López-Alt uses a thermal imaging camera to show you how the heat is distributed throughout the wok during cooking. This is particularly helpful for those who are new to stir-frying and want to make sure they're using the right amount of heat. The recipes in The Wok are easy to follow and include detailed instructions. López-Alt also provides tips and tricks throughout the book, such as how to properly season your wok and how to make sure your wok stays nonstick. In summary, The Wok is a must-have cookbook for anyone who loves to cook. With its science-based approach, stunning photography, and comprehensive range of recipes, this cookbook is sure to become a staple in kitchens around the world. When it comes to producing quick, flavorful meals, the wok beats every other pan in the kitchen, and López-Alt shows you how to use it to its full potential. So, get your wok out of the cabinet and start cooking! Take a step towards unlocking a world of knowledge and inspiration. Buy the book now or sign up for Audible's 30-day free trial and experience the power of audiobooks today! Price: [price_with_discount] (as of [price_update_date] - Details)

[mariaantonnietta]

Finally writing about my ENG Honmaru.

I said I was gonna after the end of the eng server, and I wanna follow throught before the new year. So the next few posts are gonna be about that, will do a read more to not fill up to much room.

Having said that, let's start!!

Firstly, before the server ended I wanted to use up all my kiwame sets, see all indoor clothes and finishing all maps available (until 8-4) , I did not manage to do any of them, but it was still fun! I did get a lot of indoors, and the kiwame I didn't know you got full sets for finishing a map in 8 era. I ended up with 1 left. About 8 era, the maps are beutiful. Especially the 3rd map. The fourth map I didn't know it had 3 parts, I gave up on the second when I barely would be able to reach the end with luck and i discovered in the wiki there was another part. I found hakusan invaluable here. I never gave him that much attention cause shichiseiken ability sounds better, and I liked only cause of his design and school, but holy Ibdo not regret raising him to 99 in the summer event ( i wanted my swords to have a medic). He's a beast that let's you advance. Managed to get to 8-4 with my kiwame tantou team, in which the highest lvl were atsushi and yagen, both at 45. (Yagen just barely reached while atsushi was my leading lvl tantou almost always, still had the exp advantage to the end) So there's that map and kiwame set unconquered too, but i refer I need higher level tantou or another strategy to beat that one.

The indoor clothes was cause i had many people to see their clothing and too little time, but so a lot more, I also spent the rest of koban in summer clothes, well spent.

Apart for that I did all dialogues I could aford to do with the swords I had, Hasabe and Nihongo was especially funny cause you need 20 outings with them together to get to the second part, and as I was collecting recollections with other swords at the same time, they ended up hearing all the gossip talks ( a lot of them). Some of them like the one with kasen, sayo and the dategumi are a pain to get. Uff, my dategumi and sayo were high level, but kasen wasn't. And you needed to win a stage multiple times. The shinsengumi one was also difficult. The one with hone, tanuki and otegine was essier but annoying cause it was in 8 era.

There were also a few dialogues that didn't trigger. Taikogane and souza one. Also kasen and kokin one, which I believe is cause i never finished the 2nd run of the special mission ( literally the event ended 2 lantens away, luckily i already had one from the new years tickets) yeah unorthodox choice, but it paid off. Maybe that's why it didn't trigger, but is not written anywhere as a requirement. And no idea about taikogane ( he was also a new year pick...maybe that's the reason, but i never heard this being an issue, so idk)

Apart from that, i took photos of my gallery and my list with swords in level order. And my stock. And formed my 4 formations as how best i saw fit. Will Show it here.

About the swords, showing the gallery will suffice. Cause there's a lot of images, I will post them in a separate post. But here is my final formations, left ready to battle.

First formation is my assault team, kiwame tantou with both atsushi and yagen the highest leveled. The second the leader is my first sword kashu and the rest is a uchitagana/wakizaki mixed, and all terrain, but a bit under leveled ( i liked kashuu resting). The third one is my day firmation, here Tarou my most experienced oodachi Who helped me a lot is leading, and the yari and naginata are my only kiwame of the type. Shoudakiri here with Shishio are my earliest, strudiest swords, with shishio being left as attendant at the end as he was the mayority of the time. And fourth is leading my second sword, with maeda and fudou. A second a bit lower level but still letal tantou team.

I did not save the order of smith, but i remember hirano was my second sword (tutorial) and fudou my third (first forge outside tutorial) Funny thing is my second forge in JPN is maeda , so a funny twin thing happened there ( gokotai my third) .

So that's how I got the formations. On chores I left mikazuki and ichigo, shichiseiken and hakusan, and nagasone and my extra kashu, also named kage kashu by me. Nagasone is my first 3:00:00 in JPN llike Shishiou on my EN account, so these people I wanted to assing too. Kage kashu with normal kashu in formation lets them both appear.

Also, another thing that happened is that on the last day as I enter my kage Kashu ask me to go kiwame training. I'm in tears cause I'm sure he could have asked before and didn't. ( or not, I probably messed up XD)

I also said I was gonna talk about this extra Kashu, so I will do it here. Basically, on the Great Invasion, or in a training before it, but after having choosing the starter path of dialogue with my starter kashu, and before main event when we go to moon background dimention, I got kashu to level 99 and decide it would be great to send my kashu to kiwame, so I did.

And then I was in another dimention, all the buttons were blocked and I needed a kashu to advance the story. I was sweating at the time thinking I had softlocked myself, praying that when I clicked ok on the notification I could use the forge to get a kashu ( I had the resources, it was that or waiting kashu return) .

To my surprise after clicking the button I notice there's a gift in my mail box. Yeah, the developers had thought about it and had sent me a kashu kiyomitsu. (Or they accounted for the fact that kashu could be broken, either way, I'm trankful)

I imagine being him, just appearing, and having to deal with the mess mikazuki had left. And when my kashu got back things became even weirder. Remember I started the path with normal kashu and now I had kiwame kashu. So the rest of the event it the dialogues went in tandem, in one it was kiwame kashu and in the next it was normal kashu. This happened even in the expeditions!! When normally 2 of the same sword can't be present ( i hc they are treated as one by the time machine) but in here the both appeared ( nor at the same time in windows and the signature indicated only 6 as always, but these 2 were to the same expedition even if the machine didn't register it that way) and it made the experience feel more unique. So I couldn't get rid of him. I locked him in and kept him in level 1, until the end of servers where I fed him all my sweets and let him go collect resources, he ended up at level 80. He and shishio also have an onamori.

I never wanted to send him to kiwame, as another reason I wanted to keep him was so I could see both versions of kashu, but him asking me on the last day I log in really made me a bit emotional.

I took a screen shot of the moment. I decline cause I do not have a pigeon and he would be going to the void.

Well, now the data may be gone, but l like to believe they are in a musou situation right now ( not exactly like musou, able to exist in a place), and with the resources left and them gathering more they will be fine. There's even a kiwame set left, for someone who may one day do the travel. Or maybe won't. But there still should live well. I left shishio as attendant, he was attendant since I got him, he's great and I trust him.

My attendant. And of course, to end this post, a photo I took a bit before this, to my darling first sword.

I really loved this honmaru. I hope they are well somewhere, beyond the pixels realm. Bye, bye!!

[biographytalk0]

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