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#you can also send asks/replies with questions if you have any. and if anyone has tag name ideas you can suggest those too
vocalsynthsource · 11 months
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Art tag interest check
Hi, mod of this blog here! I've been thinking about featuring a bit of fanart here and how best to do it. The blog would still primarily be news, and I don’t want to post so much that things get buried, so I'd like to feature a few posts once a week, probably on Fridays.
I'm thinking of starting a specific tag people could post to if they want their art reblogged here. Two things: I may reblog everything over the course of several Fridays (not necessarily the soonest Friday the art is posted), and I would probably only reblog one of any given artist’s posts per Friday so I can reblog multiple people every week.
So all of that said,
Reblogs are appreciated! You can also tell me your thoughts in the tags. If there ends up being enough interest, look out for a followup post.
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hintsofhoney · 2 months
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Mine
Paring(s): Alpha!Dean Winchester x F!Omega!Reader
Summary: When Dean is forced to mark Y/N in order to not blow their cover on a case, it leads him to reveal a secret that he's been keeping since they met.
Square(s) Filled: biting for @anyfandomkinkbingo
Tags: 18+, true mates, smut, p in v, marking, a/b/o if that wasn't already obvious lmao, knotting
Word Count: 3.7k
A/N: Helloooo, it's been a minute. If I'm being honest, I have about 10-15 finished works just sitting in my "ready to post" folder, but posting is always such an ordeal, so they just stay there until I feel like dealing with Tumblr. But, this one I did write over the last two days after I finished reading Bride by Ali Hazelwood, which I loved so much that it made me want to dip my toes into the Omegaverse! That being said, I don't know how much in here is actually in line with A/B/O "rules", but I know I needed to twist some things to fit the story (e.g. in this specific A/B/O fic/universe, claiming marks will fade if they're not true mates). Huge thank you to my A/B/O girlies, @makeadealwithdean and @emoryhemsworth, for reading it over, I love you both to the moon and back! I hope you all enjoy!
You can also read me on Ao3!
DEAN WINCHESTER MASTERLIST |  SUPERNATURAL MASTERLIST |  MAIN MASTERLIST
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“We get in, find the knife, get out, got it?” Dean asks, looking between Sam in the front seat and Y/N in the back, making sure everyone is on the same page. They both nod once in understanding, before the three of them make their way out of the car, their doors slamming shut simultaneously. 
Y/N stares up at the mansion before them, the music loud, the party raging. It’s some charity event thrown by the wealthiest Alpha in the state, and he just happens to have the weapon they need to finish out this hunt. Y/N stumbles a bit, tripping over the cobblestone driveway in her heels, and she catches the sleeve of Dean’s suit to steady herself. He shoots her a glare that tells her to pull it together. They need to blend in.
“Sorry,” she whispers.
“Here,” Dean replies, grabbing her wrist and pulling it through the crook formed by his bent elbow, forcing them to walk arm-in-arm.
“I don’t need –”
“You are an Omega, Y/N. And there are upwards of a hundred Alphas here who can all smell it. So what you need to do is start acting like one. Just because I’m not some asshole Alpha who demands your respect doesn’t mean they aren’t, and we can’t risk drawing attention to ourselves.”
Y/N takes a deep breath and plasters on a fake smile as they move slowly up the driveway. “Anyone who demands my respect just because of some bullshit biological hierarchy doesn’t deserve it,” she grits out.
Dean stops, turning to face her, one of his hands on either side of her biceps. “Do you want to be on this case or not?” 
His voice is lower than usual, demanding and gruff. A voice he only uses when he wants to remind her that he is an Alpha, and bullshit biological hierarchy aside, her body is wired to listen to him. 
She gulps, and he tries not to focus on the bob in her throat, the pulse in her neck near her gland, the scent of her. The moment he met her he knew who she was, what they were. Are. He’s been taking scent blockers since before he met her, finding it far easier to interact with other Alphas when investigating cases if they couldn’t scent him out, but the moment he met her, he knew he had to start taking rut blockers too. Though, it feels like the longer he’s around her, the more immune he becomes to the pills. Like she’s going to send him into a rut any fucking second, and she has no idea. He’s thought about telling her so many times, but mates come with strings. Strings that aren’t conducive to the life of a hunter.
“Yes,” she answers his question meekly, almost submissively, and he nods to cover the hormones he forces himself to swallow down. Rejecting your biology is not easy, no matter how many pills you take.
“Then I’m going to need you to take my arm, put on a smile, and act like being an Omega is the greatest joy of your life. That means –”
“I know how to be a good little Omega, Dean,” she interrupts, dragging the words ‘good little Omega’ through a sarcastic tone.
He tenses slightly at her words, sarcastic or not. Good little Omega.
“I’m only bad for you,” she continues with a cheeky wink, and fuck, he might explode. Hell, he might take her into the bushes right now and mark her, claim her, before parading her around in front of this entire fucking party with his teeth marks on her neck. He’s rigid, trying to keep himself under control, and she gives him a playful pat on his shoulder. “Lighten up, Alpha,” she teases. “I’ll be a good girl.”
Jesus fucking Christ. He gives her biceps a squeeze that he hopes comes off as reassuring as he’s trying to make it seem, before linking his arm with hers once more and catching up to Sam at the front of the driveway.
The trio is greeted by the owner of the mansion himself, one Jim Myers, who welcomes them in with a smile on his face and a cigar in his hand. 
“How Gatsby-esque,” Y/N mutters under her breath, watching as Myers shakes Sam’s hand.
Dean nods in agreement. “You definitely wore the right outfit.”
Y/N blushes as she looks down at her dress; a black, semi body-hugging cocktail dress bedazzled with gold sequins in some sort of art deco pattern. All she’s missing is a cigarette holder and a feather in her hair. 
“Only because I read the invitation. Unlike some of us,” she mumbles in reply.
“Watch it, Omega,” Dean grits out, plastering on a smile as soon as Myers comes over to greet him.
“Jim Myers, pleasure,” he says, shaking Dean’s hand.
“Dean. And this is Y/N.”
She keeps the cordial smile on her face as Jim takes her hand and brings it to his lips, kissing it gently before inhaling her scent. 
“Pleasure, Miss Y/N,” he says with a feral grin, his eyes darkening with unmistakable lust as he lets her hand fall back to her side. 
Dean takes a step forward, unable to stop himself. “Mine,” he practically growls, and Jim takes a step back, throwing his hands up in surrender. 
“My apologies. I didn’t see a mark, so I just assumed.”
Dean falters, clearing his throat, suddenly reminded of the reason they’re all here in the first place. “No, that’s alright. It’s my fault for not putting it in a visible place.” His eyes dart over to Y/N’s. “I think I’m gonna fix that.”
She ducks her head but can’t hide the red flush that creeps up into her cheeks, reminding herself that it’s just her biology, and that this is all for show anyway. They’re here to do a job, and sometimes those jobs involve… well, whatever the hell just happened. And clearly, Dean is a better actor than she gives him credit for.
Jim chuckles, clasping his hands together. “Well, you three have fun, the drinks are free, the food is good, and if you,” he points at Sam, “good sir, are in search of an Omega, there are plenty to choose from.”
Sam blushes. “Right.” He nods. “Thanks.”
And with that, Jim disappears into the crowd.
“I’ll keep an eye on him,” Sam says. “You two go. Upstairs, down the hall, third door on the right. If I got the right blueprints.”
“If you got the right blueprints?” Dean asks.
“Just go.” He taps his ear to indicate that he’ll drop in on Dean’s earpiece if anything goes wrong. 
Dean sighs, taking Y/N by the hand and leading her up the stairs. He weaves in and out of the crowd, the scents of everyone mixing together, making it impossible to decipher who is what. Y/N’s never been more glad to be on heat suppressors; knowing full well the scents of this many Alphas invading her nostrils would send her body into a major one.
Dean quickly finds the door, and they slip into the room unnoticed, closing the barrier and switching on the light. It’s a bedroom — the master, from the looks of it — and the knife is right in front of them in the middle of the room, across from the foot of the bed. It’s in a glass case, on display, and likely armed with a million alarms, but right in front of them nonetheless. 
“Son of a bitch,” Dean mutters, running a hand through his hair as he thinks about what the next move should be.
“We could find something that weighs the same? Lift the glass and replace it super fast?” Y/N offers.
“Unfortunately, I think it’s the glass that’s probably set to trip an alarm. But the fact that you’re applying Indiana Jones to real life scenarios is making me want to —” 
He stops himself, realizing what he was about to say. He needs to get himself under control but Y/N in that dress with her smart fucking mouth, with other Alphas eyeing her, he really shouldn’t be here, with her, alone, and —
“Making you want to what?” she asks.
Shit. “Making me want to… make you watch more of them,” he replies, opting to circle the display case, searching it for a way in to distract himself from her. 
“Oh, goody. Can’t wait.” She’s as monotone and sarcastic as ever, and every time something smart comes out of her mouth he has to resist the urge to bend her over and fuck her right then.
“Get out of there now,” Sam’s voice comes in on Dean’s earpiece. “Lost track of him for a few seconds, just found him again. He’s making his way upstairs.”
“Shit,” Dean says. “Shit, shit, shit.” He looks around the room frantically. If they go out the door, Myers will without a doubt see them leaving his room. “Myers is coming,” he explains to a confused-looking Y/N.
“Fucking — God dammit.” She looks around too, for a hiding spot, for a weapon, and then she spots herself in the mirror hanging on the wall and an idea comes to her. “Mark me,” she orders.
“What?” Dean snaps, his attention fully on her.
“Get over here and mark me. You told him you were going to make it visible.” She continues before Dean can protest. “Who knows if it’ll even stay, it’s not like we’re mates, right? And if it does, I don’t mind being bound to you for the rest of ever. It’s not like I’m having much luck in the relationship department anyway. But we need that knife, and we’re not going to get it if we don’t –”
“Fuck,” he says under his breath with a quick shake of his head, before he strides across the room and pushes her up against the wall just in time to hear the door click. He inhales her scent, his mouth trailing from the base of her jaw all the way down to her mating gland where it hovers as the door opens all the way. Then he bites down.
Y/N throws her head back, her fingers digging into Dean’s shoulders as his teeth sink into her, and none of it is for show. The pain is euphoric, and her senses heighten, and she suddenly wishes she hadn’t been so stringent on taking her fucking pills, because whatever this feeling is, coursing through her veins, settling in her core, she needs to feel it more. She can’t stand how dulled it is, how it just stays there, simmering underneath the surface. She wants to erupt. 
“Mm, fuck, Alpha!” she cries out, no trace of sarcasm in her voice, and Dean’s hands grip her hips tight enough to bruise them. 
“Oh, I’m so sorry!” Jim exclaims. “Got an alert that someone was in here, there’s some very valuable things in here, you see, and I just wanted to make sure —”
Dean pulls away from her neck long enough to shoot him a glare that translates to “get out or I’m going to kill you”, and Jim gets the message, backing out the door and shutting it behind him. 
“Fuck,” Dean breathes, letting his forehead fall to Y/N’s shoulder. He shouldn’t be so close to her. He should back away, give himself some space to breathe. But her scent keeps him rooted in place. It’s her usual scent; something like freshly baked sugar cookies and vanilla, sweet and enticing, but there’s something else, something —
“Are you guys okay?” Sam’s voice in his damn ear again.
Dean lifts his head and presses the button on his earpiece to reply. “Fine, Sam. Give us a second.” Then he takes the earpiece out and tosses it over his shoulder, more agitated than he should be at his brother just trying to check in.
“Dean,” she breathes, and she sounds absolutely wrecked. She brings her hands to his cheeks, forcing him to look at her. “Are you okay?” 
He nods. Her touch is like fire on his skin. He needs her. 
Y/N squeezes her thighs together. She’s never been able to scent Dean before, but he’s never been this close for this long. He’s never marked her, either. Right now his scent is breaking through the suppressants, little by little. It’s bits of cedar and leather and whiskey, and she’s never smelt anything like it, yet it is so familiar somehow. It invades her senses, and if this is what he smells like with suppressants, she’s terrified of what would happen without them.
“Dean… your scent.” She closes her eyes and inhales deeply.
“Fuck, my pills must’ve worn off, I —”
She shakes her head. “It’s dulled but… but it’s there.” Her thighs clench together again, and she needs him back on her skin. “It’s there and it’s so fucking good.”
Dean’s eyes fall to the gland on her neck, and the severity of what he’s done comes crashing into him like a wrecking ball. It’s enough to force him to take a step away from her, panic rising in his chest. “I – fuck. I marked you. I fucking marked you.”
Y/N’s fingers come up to graze the indent on her neck, and she shudders at the touch. “I told you to.”
“No, you don’t understand, Y/N –”
“I know what happens when mates get marked, Dean,” she interrupts matter-of-factly. “I’m sure this’ll fade.”
“It won’t. I – I shouldn’t have done that. Fuck. Fuck!” He turns to the wall next to him, hitting it with the side of his closed fist. 
“Dean.” Her touch on his arm is gentle and comforting, but he doesn’t turn to face her. “You need to calm down. It’s really not a big deal, I –”
Dean takes a deep breath, both hands on the wall now as he collects himself. He can’t even bring himself to look at her when he says, “You’re my mate, Y/N.”
She takes a step back, and her fading scent is what makes him finally face her. She’s halfway across the room by the time he does. 
“W-what do you mean?”
“You’re my mate, Y/N,” he repeats.
She shakes her head, her hand coming to her neck again, the teeth marks seared into her skin. “N-no. H-how? When? How – how long have you known?”
Dean takes another long, deep breath. He could lose her tonight. She could run and never come back and he wouldn’t blame her. “Since we met.”
“THREE YEARS!?” she roars. “YOU’VE KNOWN FOR THREE FUCKING YEARS!?”
“Y/N, I –”
She stalks toward him, one finger outstretched, one fist clenched by her side. She points at him as she backs him into a wall, and he’s incredibly turned on and incredibly scared at the same time. 
“You’ve known that we’re fucking mates for three years, and you didn’t feel as though that was pertinent fucking information to tell me!?”
Dean swallows. “I – it’s – there are… strings with mates. You know that. I didn’t want to ball and chain you. I didn’t want to keep you anywhere you didn’t want to be. And if – fuck – we’re hunters, Y/N. If something had happened to me, and you knew… I didn’t want you to have to live with that. With the pain that comes with losing a true mate.”
Y/N stops half a foot away and drops her accusatory finger. “What did you say?” she whispers.
“True… mates,” Dean breathes.
“We’re…? But… We never – I don’t –”
“With me on my pills, and you on your pills, I think it was enough to… so we just never…”
“But you knew,” she says, closing the gap between them, her hand coming up to caress his cheek. “You knew for so long and you watched me go on dates, had to listen about the… things I did with other Alphas… if I had mated with one of them, you –”
“You deserved to have a choice. Regardless of what I wanted, you deserved to have a choice.” 
“My choice could’ve left you depressed and alone and celibate forever, you fucking dumbass.” 
He shrugs, and her hand falls to rest over his heart. She stares at it as she continues.
“When you… marked me… I felt… I don’t know what I felt. Nothing’s ever been so intense.”
She looks up at him through her eyelashes, and he smiles softly.
“That’s the bond,” he explains, his large palm coming to rest over the hand on his chest. 
“And if we weren’t on… our blockers?”
“If we weren’t on our blockers, there’s no fucking telling how many pups we’d have running around by now.”
Y/N shivers as the thought of being bred settles in her core, and for once she’s not cursing her biology. Dean chuckles faintly at her reaction, dropping his forehead to hers. 
“We can practice in the meantime. Until you decide you want off of them.”
She inhales deeply, taking in as much of his scent as she can. “Oh, I –” another deep breath, “I’m getting off of them for sure.”
Dean lets out a borderline animalistic growl, thinking about how many times he’ll get to fuck her through that first heat. “I’m gonna stop taking my pills, too,” he says breathily.
“Yeah?”
“I had to get on rut blockers when you moved into the Bunker because I knew I wouldn’t be able to control myself. But now,” he says, spinning them both around and pinning Y/N against the wall, “now I don’t fuckin’ have to.”
“Dean,” she half gasps, half moans. He kisses the mark on her neck before licking all the way up to her jaw line and pulling back. 
“You drive me fuckin’ crazy, Omega.”
She meets his feral gaze with one of her own, a glint of mischief in her eyes. “Prove it.” 
And it might be an incredibly stupid thing to say to a horny Alpha, but it’s also Dean. And he’d never hurt her.
“Mm, fuck.” His voice is raspy and wrecked and they haven’t even done anything yet. Before Y/N can process what’s happening, he’s picking her up and throwing her onto the bed. He climbs over her, hovering for a moment, taking in her flushed cheeks, the warmth radiating off of her, her scent. “You’re beautiful,” he states plainly, like it’s the one fact in the world that he knows without a doubt to be true. 
Y/N blushes. “Thank you, Alpha.” She says it because she knows what it does to him. 
“You’re beautiful, and I’m gonna fuckin’ ruin you.” 
A gasp leaves her lips as he pushes her dress up her hips and moves down her body to the foot of the mattress, his fingertips dancing along the hem of her panties before his eyes meet with hers. She gives him a nod, and it’s all the confirmation he needs before pulling them down her legs and tossing them aside. 
He watches hungrily as she spreads her thighs, her core damn near dripping with her wetness, and if this is what it’s like when she’s on heat blockers, he can’t even begin to imagine what it’ll look like covered in her slick. His cock grows hard in his slacks at the thought, and he has to step off the bed to take off his pants and boxers before the containment grows painful. He shrugs off his suit jacket and white dress shirt too, and when he’s standing in front of the bed, fully naked, Y/N is propping herself up on her elbows to take him in.
“Holy – fuck,” is all she can get out. 
Dean chuckles deeply, one knee coming up onto the mattress as he fists his cock. “Fuck, sweetheart.” He looks her over again, pussy glistening, nipples peaked through her dress. “Fuck, I want you to – would you present for me?”
A smirk spreads across her lips, but she doesn’t say anything before flipping over and assuming the position. Ass up, legs shoulder width apart, chest resting on the mattress. 
Dean lets out a low and guttural, “Fuuuuck,” and it’s enough to make her pussy clench around nothing. She feels the mattress dip behind her, and when his cock starts to move through her folds, she almost cums right then and there. 
“I know you you wish you weren’t an Omega,” he starts, “but you’re a fuckin’ perfect one, baby.” 
She shakes her head, soft whimpers escaping her as he continues to tease her with his dick. “I’m glad I’m an Omega, because I’m yours.” 
With that, Dean loses what little self control he has left. He lines himself up with her entrance and sinks into her heat, and she feels so fucking perfect, the way she molds around his cock. The noises leaving her throat spur him on as he thrusts into her, setting a bruising pace. He wraps his hand around her shoulder for leverage, his other gripping her ass.
“Oh my fuck!” she practically screams, and he can feel how close she is, can smell it. 
“You’re gonna be a good little Omega and cum for me, aren’t you baby?” he pants, and he couldn’t be thrusting deeper if he tried.
She nods frantically. “Yesyesyes, please, Alpha, I wanna to cum. I wanna — mm, fuck — on your —”
She’s too fucked out to even finish her sentence, and Dean can feel himself about to fall over the edge. “What’s that, sweetheart? Speak up.”
“I wanna cum — oh, God! — on your knot. Fucking fill me up, Dean, please.”
He barely manages another thrust before he buries himself to the hilt, the base of his cock swelling inside her as he pumps her full of his seed.
The feeling of him filling her sends her over the edge, her pussy clenching around his cock, his knot, and she feels so full and fucked and sated.
“Oh my fucking fuuuuck,” he groans, feeling her pulse around him. “Fuck, everyone and this fuckin’ party is gonna be able to smell me inside of you.”
She moans at his words.
“Gonna have me dripping down your thighs ‘til we get back home.” His hand squeezes the globe of her ass before he leans over, getting as close to her ear as he can. “And then I’m gonna fuck you again. And again. And again. Because we got three years to make up for.” He nips at her ear playfully. “And now you’re finally mine.”
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roosterforme · 25 days
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Yours Truly, Bradley Bradshaw Part 21 | Rooster x Reader
Summary: Bradley is learning firsthand just how lonely a deployment can be when he's gotten used to talking to you all the time. You are more than happy to record your daily adventures for him, including your steamy ones.
Warnings: Fluff, angst, masturbation, adult language, romantic Bradley, 18+
Length: 3700 words
Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female teacher!Reader
Check out my masterlist for more! Yours Truly, Bradley Bradshaw masterlist
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Your original plan to commute to work from your apartment in Mira Mesa went out the window after the box from Bradley arrived. Suddenly his place seemed cozier now that there were tidy rows of envelopes from him covering the table in the living room. You sipped a mug of coffee and looked at all of them, selecting the one that said Open me with your class.
"Whatever you say, Bradley," you murmured with a smile, tucking it into your tote bag for work. You missed your kids almost as much as you missed him, but at least you'd finally get to see them today. You just hoped there was something upbeat in the note, because you were going to have to inform them that he'd be gone until Career Day. Or maybe longer.
Opening the note that was meant for you and your class before digging into all the others just felt right. Really, he was a faithful pen pal to all nineteen of you, even if his current letters were pre-written. As you drove to work, you wondered how long it would take your students to ask about Bradley. Turns out, it didn't take too long at all.
You were standing behind your desk, getting hugs from some of the kids as they got reacquainted with each other and the classroom for the first time in almost two weeks when Jayden asked, "What did you get Lieutenant Bradshaw for Christmas?"
Images of lingerie danced in your head as you cleared your throat. "Stationery," you replied. "So he can write us letters while he's deployed."
"He's deployed?" asked Nia, face lighting up. "With Marty?"
"Can we do another drawing contest with him?" shouted Oliver, already getting colored pencils out of his desk.
"Will you ask if he's allowed to take a video while he's flying this time?" Violet asked calmly.
"Actually," you replied, walking slowly to the front of the room with a single envelope in your hands, "we can't do any of those things. He's not allowed to communicate with anyone who isn't on the aircraft carrier this time around. If he writes to us, he'll have to save the letters until he returns."
Everyone stared blankly at you. 
Jackie raised her hand. When you pointed to her, she said, "But we're not like random people. We're students of aviation. We're his pen pals."
"Yeah!" came a chorus of voices, and you were half tempted to write up a petition to the Navy for all of them to sign.
You had to clap your hands and wait for them to clap in response after they all quieted down again. "I have a note that he wants me to open with you. Should we do that now?"
After literally everyone agreed that was a good idea, you opened it and found a handwritten link to a YouTube video followed by a short note that you read out loud.
"Greetings, Fourth Graders,
By the time you read this, it will be January, and I'll be on an aircraft carrier in the Atlantic Ocean for a seven week deployment. I'm sure your lovely teacher has explained that sending and receiving letters is sadly not a possibility for me right now. I'm going to need you to keep track of all your questions about aviation until I get back for Career Day next month. I'll bring some of my friends along, and we can answer them for you then. Sound good?
Make sure you listen to your teacher, and I'll see you all in February.
Yours Truly,
Lieutenant Bradshaw"
You looked up from the notecard and added, "He also included a link to a YouTube video. Should we check it out now?"
It was actually amazing how quietly they all sat in anticipation while you set up your projector and typed out the link. When you turned out the lights, you had to grab onto the edge of your desk as Bradley's face and voice filled your classroom, even though he wasn't actually there. The twenty minute video began with him sitting on his living room couch in his worn out jeans and the Top Gun shirt you wore to bed last night, and you realized he must have filmed this on Christmas Eve when you were out with Natasha.
"Hi, everyone," said video Bradley as he waved to his phone camera. "I thought I would try my hand at a little lesson on aviation so your teacher could get a break. Make sure you take notes. There will be a quiz the next time I see you."
All of your students were watching him with rapt attention and pencils poised over their notebooks. Bradley kept them engaged and entertained while you fell even more in love.
-----------------------------
"What the fuck?" Bradley groaned as he sank down into an empty spot on one of the long benches in the mess hall. The spaghetti looked like mush, but his stomach was growling so aggressively, he decided to take a bite anyway. It tasted just as bad as it looked, and he grimaced as he started to shovel it into his mouth anyway.
What he wouldn't give for dinner at Salvatore's. Mouthwatering pasta. Expensive as hell wine. You in a short little dress with his hands all over your thighs. Maybe Bronco parking lot sex.
Instead he got another USS Gerald R. Ford meal which was barely edible, and a view of a very hairy Atlantic Fleet aviator with the call sign Curly. Fantastic. Even the garlic bread was so stale it was hard to chew, but if he didn't eat, he would start losing weight. And if he started losing weight, it would make working out harder, which would suck, because going to the gym was his main source of entertainment.
Other than writing letters he couldn't send.
"Are you gonna finish that?" Curly asked, pointing at the roll Bradley only bit the corner of.
"It's all yours, man," he replied, watching the other aviator pick it up and crunch on it with a smile. 
Bradley picked up his tray with the intention of heading to his bunk to change into gym clothes, but when he got there, he collapsed onto the twin sized bed instead. It was clear that he'd only been brought along for this deployment to fly one very specific mission, because as a whole, the Atlantic Fleet pilots were young and green. But as a result of the current political climate, he had internet access completely taken away from him, and he was stuck here for five more weeks with nothing to keep him sane. He didn't even have Marty this time around. Just the pretty stationery set you gave him and the holiday cards from your students.
So he would do what he always did now. He would write. To all nineteen of you. But mostly to you. He realized, like he always did, that this was probably the most boring shit that anyone would ever read. How many times could you really read about your boyfriend telling you that he loved you and missed you. It wasn't like he was writing elegant poetry here.
Gorgeous, I miss you so much. You'd cry if you saw the spaghetti I had to eat for dinner. First thing I'm doing when I get home (besides you) is driving us to Salvatore's, and I won't stop eating until I pass out. The Atlantic Fleet food makes the Pacific Fleet cabbage rolls seem like a delicacy, and the US fucking Navy can quote me on that. 
I love you. I wish you knew I was coming back to you instead of Norfolk. I wish I could ask you to use the credit card in my sock drawer to fully stock the refrigerator before I get home. The only things I want to do for three solid days after I arrive back in San Diego are eat, sleep, and fuck my girlfriend.
Definitely not poetry. "Was my writing this shitty last time around?" he murmured to himself with a laugh. It couldn't have been if you kept responding to him for the duration of that deployment. Just thinking about your letters, both professional and personal, made him ache right now. Your emails and your sassy selfies and the sunset photos were things he didn't even know he had been taking for granted.
One letter from you now would have made everything so much better. With a deep sigh, Bradley changed to head to the gym.
------------------------------
Time passed slowly. Packing up and moving boxes of your things from Mira Mesa to Coronado helped, but you were a little too nervous to unpack too much other than the necessities. You didn't even want to think about that right now. All you wanted to do was plan your next visit to the wine bar with Natasha so you felt a little less lonely. 
As you hung the framed blueprint of the Super Hornet Bradley gave you in the living room, you realized he would have to be lonelier than you were. At least you had Jayden's tales of Vanessa the dog to make you laugh during the work day. And you went out to dinner with some of your friends you hadn't seen recently. And you had a never ending text thread with Natasha now. 
There was a pretty good chance Bradley didn't know anyone on this deployment, and you wondered if he was spending a lot of time in the gym. What you wouldn't give for a gym selfie. You collapsed onto the couch and scrolled through the images of your boyfriend that you had saved to your phone.
"God," you moaned. He was so hot. Especially in front of a sunset. Especially with your lipgloss smudged on his cheek. Especially when he was looking at you in his arms instead of at the camera. "Fuck."
When someone knocked on the door, you nearly fell off the couch. Your eyes caught on the envelopes from Bradley that you hadn't yet opened lined up on the coffee table as you walked across the room. The last time you had an unexpected visitor, it was Natasha. The time before that, it was Vanessa. You didn't know who to expect, but you squared your shoulders and pulled the door open with an abundance of attitude only to find a slightly hunched over older woman standing there.
"Oh!" you said, immediately softening your stance. "What can I do for you?"
She looked from you to the Bronco in the driveway and then back again. "Is Bradley home?"
"No, he's not," you told her, unsure about how much information to give. "Is there something you need?"
She eyed you carefully. "Are you his girlfriend? The teacher he fell in love with?" This stranger knew who you were. When you gave her a concerned look and took a step away from her, she said, "I'm Edith. I live next door. Sometimes Bradley helps me with yard work and repairs around my property." She smiled and added, "He only lets me pay him in piano lessons."
"Edith!" You told her your name with a smile. You knew exactly who she was, because the first time Bradley wrote to you about getting piano lessons from his retired neighbor, you fell halfway in love with him on the spot. "Right, of course! Bradley is actually deployed for a few more weeks." She looked immediately dejected, so you asked, "Did you need help with something?"
"I don't want to bother you with it," she said immediately.
"Please," you replied, already reaching for your shoes. "I'm so bored without Bradley around. I would absolutely love a distraction, Edith."
She wrung her hands and then held them up. "Well, I can't change my light bulbs, because my arthritis is bad this time of year when it gets chilly out. And my back patio is so dark at night, I can't see anything."
"Say no more," you told her, joining her on the porch and closing the door behind you.
It only took you a few minutes to change the exterior light bulbs and rearrange her patio furniture. Then you cocked your head to the side and asked, "Is something beeping?"
Edith sighed. "My smoke detector needs new batteries."
"I'm on it."
She led you inside the sliding glass door, into her kitchen where the beeping was annoying enough that you didn't know how this woman could have slept in the house unless her hearing was starting to slip. Edith told you where you could find a step ladder and new batteries, and once you finished that chore, she started digging around in her purse, pulling out five dollars.
"Thank you for your help," she said, trying to hand it to you as you walked past the piano with the step ladder.
"I am absolutely not accepting your money, Edith. This was the most entertaining part of my day. As long as your arthritis allows it, you can pay Bradley in extra piano lessons when he returns." 
The idea of Norfolk suddenly made you feel anxious, but Edith smiled. "Oh, he's an advanced student. He mostly just plays from memory. I only point out when he's flat instead of sharp."
You weren't sure how long it had been since Bradley checked in with her, but as long as he was allowed to come back to San Diego, you'd make sure he did it more often. "I'll send him over as soon as he gets back."
Edith smiled knowingly. "Something tells me he's not going to want to leave your side right when he gets back. But maybe after a day or two, you could send him over?"
"I'll do that," you told her with a chuckle.
After you walked back across the yard and let yourself inside, you kicked off your shoes and decided to treat yourself with one of Bradley's notes. You'd been trying to ration them, but they were all so tempting. The ones you had already opened were stacked up on the kitchen counter where you could easily find them to read them again and again. You took a few seconds to decide which one felt right, and you settled on Open me when you need a laugh.
Inside the envelope, you found no note at all. There was just one photo, and when you pulled it out, you burst into laughter. Natasha was right; twenty-two year old Bradley was endearingly skinny and mustache-less. He still wore that same grin today, but he really grew into his frame. You marveled over how fresh his scars looked in the picture, deciding to hang it up in the bedroom for now. 
And when you woke up on Sunday, the photo was the first thing you saw.
You reached for your phone thinking you could text Bradley before tossing it aside in frustration. You were frustrated in every way. Mentally and emotionally, but also physically. You missed sleeping next to him most nights. You missed his warmth and the way he kissed you. His strong body and attentive hands.
When you tried to burrow down under the covers in just his sweatshirt to go back to sleep, your skin felt like it was charged. Like there was an undercurrent of need that nothing would soothe except for Bradley.
Open me when you're in bed
That's what one of the envelopes said. You bit your lip before burying your face in Bradley's pillow and moaning. The need was still there, more palpable by the second. You had about an hour before Natasha was supposed to pick you up for brunch and the wine bar; it was the perfect time to read that note.
You ran down the hallway to the coffee table, grabbed the envelope, and took it straight back to bed. Your curiosity had been gnawing away at your mind over what could be in the note meant for the quiet solitude of the bedroom, and now was your chance to find out as you slipped back under the covers.
Gorgeous,
You better be in our bed right now. Maybe you just got home from work. Maybe you're still waking up for the day. Maybe you're ready to fall asleep soon, but you just need something to take the edge off. It doesn't matter, as long as you're thinking about me and my hands all over your body. I hope you're ready to read about how I would take care of you right now.... in an abundance of detail.
You moaned as you looked around the room, wide-eyed like someone was going to catch on to what he had written to you. Desire flared inside you as you squeezed your thighs together and took a few deep breaths before continuing to read.
You're beautiful inside and out. It's no surprise that you really get me going. One thought about the soft swell of your ass or the way you taste when you cum is enough to get me seriously hard. Jerking off while thinking about you is fantastic, but nothing compares to the real thing. Next time I see you, we're taking our time to get reacquainted, but right now, if I could have you, it would be fast and dirty.
"Oh god," you groaned, closing your eyes as you pushed his sweatshirt up, letting cool air meet your warm skin. Then your hand slid down to the apex of your thighs, and you weren't at all surprised to find you were wet.
You look sinful in that bed. I just know it. I wouldn't be able to keep my hands off you. My lips would find your breasts before sampling my way down your belly to that soaking wet pussy. When I say every inch of your body is Gorgeous, I mean it. You've got such a tight, pretty little pussy, and I would love to tease you until you're so worked up, you're practically crying. Just my mouth and fingers until you're begging for my cock, Gorgeous. Go ahead. Beg for it.
"Bradley," you moaned softly, a complete mess for your boyfriend even when he wasn't with you.
Good girl. Now touch yourself just how I'd touch you. Rub yourself just right. Use two of those fingers to warm yourself up and then dip them down inside that perfect pussy. So fucking tight, you drive me insane when I can't be with you. I'd be right above you, singing your praises, telling you how much I love you, and pumping my fingers in and out of that pussy while you whine and beg.
This note was absolutely lethal. You were already close. Sweat beaded on your brow as you stroked your fingers along your clit before pumping them inside you. His name was never far from your lips as you kept reading.
You taste so fucking sweet. I'd run my tongue everywhere until you couldn't stand it. I would eat your pussy until you cum in my mouth. I'd keep going until I couldn't handle how badly I needed you. Then I'd fuck you so hard and fast, you'd have tears in your eyes, voice ragged as my body slapped against yours. Tits bouncing as I bottomed out, holding you in place as I came inside you. And then I would let you know that I'm yours.
I'm all yours, Gorgeous. You absolutely own me.
You were panting, grinding the heel of your hand against your clit as you came. Bradley's note fell from your fingers as your back arched off the bed, and you grabbed the sheet as you cried out. You could hear something familiar mingling with your own voice, but it took you a second to realize your phone was ringing as you writhed around in bed, heart pounding fast from your orgasm. You rolled onto your belly and grabbed your phone as you sucked air into your lungs.
Natasha Trace
Shit. Shit. You tried to get your breathing under control as you answered her call, but you even sounded strange to your own ears as you said, "Hello?"
There was a pause before Natasha asked, "I'm leaving now, and I might stop for a fancy coffee on my way to get you. Do you want something?"
"Sure!" you replied, trying your best to sound casual, but pretty sure you were failing.
"I'll be there soon."
You dropped your phone and reached for the journal instead to let Bradley know just how hard you came for him before you got dressed for the day. 
-----------------------------
"Bradshaw!"
It felt like an almost foreign concept for Bradley to hear his name now. Essentially nobody spoke to him outside of his mandatory meetings, and he'd spent so little time in a cockpit over the last few weeks, he spun around in surprise when someone called him.
Of course it was Admiral Walker. Bradley wasn't sure if he was being punished for what Cyclone had done, but he was hardly given any flight tasks to work on. But now that his deployment was starting to wind down, he realized the danger he was going to be flying into for his mission was much more than he originally anticipated.
"Admiral Walker, Sir?" he replied, saluting his superior officer. He wasn't looking to ruffle any more feathers here as long as it meant he'd be going home to you before too long. He felt sick with longing, missing you so much, especially at night, that he hurt until he was finally able to fall asleep. And then he'd wake up to the same choking feeling all over again the following day.
The older man examined him closely for a few beats before saying, "The weather looks ideal for tomorrow. You're team leader. Be ready to go at first light."
"Yes, Sir," he replied, because there was really nothing else to say. The sooner he got this over with, the sooner he could return home to his house in Coronado where you lived now. Where you were waiting for him. He just needed to get through this safely.
--------------------------------
I hate how isolated he feels. He's not thriving. He's not even eating well. He needs a hug. Gorgeous is enjoying the box of letters even is she is missing him terribly. I think I'll send him home soon. Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls
PART 22
@hotch-meeeeeuppppp
@solacestyles
@daisyhollyxox
@blog-name6996
@bcon24
@avada-kedavra-bitch-187
@katiebby04
@marantha
@averyhotchner
@abaker74
@heli991113
@k-k0129
@noz4a2
@shanimallina87
@ccbb2222
@xoxabs88xox
@thedroneranger
@cherrycola27
@fanboyswhore9
@xomrsalliej4787xo
@desert-fern
@horseslovers2016
@mattyskies
@hookslove1592
@blahehblah
@sadpetalsstuff
@local-spidey
@schoollover
@lex-winchester
@nicole01-23
@jessicab1991
@happyrebelruins
@samsgoddess
@bellaireland1981
@sagittarius-flowerchild
@mygyn
@yuckosworld
@daggerspare-standingby
@nessjo
@trickphotography2
@lyn-js
@furiousladyking
@godsfavoritebabe
@bethabear12
@halo-mystic
@sherlockstrangewolf
@theamuz
@khaylin27
595 notes · View notes
omedapixel · 9 months
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Merry Christmas Everyone!!
I've been pretty quiet on here, but that doesn't mean I've stopped simming! First up I'd like to say thanks (and sorry!) to all the lovely people who've sent me messages :) I'm gonna try my best to reply to everyone asap!
For christmas I wanted to share something special - so here is the public release of the first version of my Decorating Tools mod (or S3DT)
Quick Description - This mod adds hotkeys to the game to allow you to move objects up/down, left/right and rotate in all directions, similar to T.O.O.L for TS4 PDF Guide included below!
To my wonderful patrons - thank you for your support <3 I feel bad that real life has gotten in the way of me delivering more content to you all, so I'll likely be closing it soon! If it's possible, I'll also refund the last couple of months due to my inactivity. Anyone who wants to can still donate to my Ko-Fi
MOD INSTRUCTIONS AND DOWNLOAD BELOW THE CUT
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This version is compatible with icarusallsorts' Transmogrifier Mod, and until I can figure out how to script it better, my mod actually REQUIRES it in order for them to be compatible together.
*** EDIT - For some, you might need to use CTRL + SHIFT + Click to bring up object menus! ***
If you would like a version that does not require the Transmogrifier (but is therefore incompatible) send me a message!
FUTURE PLANS: - Adapting movement depending on camera direction - Adding a UI interface for interactions and manual rotations etc. - Scaling interactions with hotkeys
Don't be afraid to reply to this post, send me an ask or a private message if you have any questions or problems. I'm also in the Creator's Cave discord, so feel free to @ me there too :) And please tag me or use the tag #S3DT if you come up with any cool ways to use this mod!
EDIT: DOWNLOAD S3DT V.1.2
VIEW PDF GUIDE
Thank you to @greenplumbboblover for her help with pesky matrix44's, granthes and Misukisu for laying the groundwork for this mod, and @puddingface1902 for his super helpful videos!
@pis3update
2K notes · View notes
w0rmm1lk · 8 months
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Texting.
Reader: not mentioned.
characters: all characters i write for (besides kota and eri)
type: can be read as both platonic and romantic
sumarry: how i think the mha characters would text.
warnings: possible swearing, denki being denki.
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👾Mina Ashido👾
she abuses her emoji privledges. like nobody will ever receive a message from her that doesn't have an emoji. lots of all caps.
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👓Tenya Iida👓
oh you were texting him? bitch writes as if he's writing a formal email. your ass is lucky that he doesn't start that shit off with "I hope this message finds you well.". not even kidding will proof read every message he sends at least twice.
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♾️Ochaco Uraraka♾️
will end every message that isnt on a serious topic with :D. its so sweet tbh.
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⚡Denki Kaminari⚡
this man uses so many abbreviations that even if you think you use a lot just know you're learning a new one everyday. not even kidding makes up his own shit. once sent mina "lmkiydthesicci" and nobody could figure out wtf he meant. lowkey flirting with every mssg he sends. every single person in the class, girl or not has received a message from him that just says "hey bbg ;)". he received a very long lecture from iida and a very confused reply from todoroki. todoroki didn't actually know wtf bbg meant. thought he misspelled bbq at first.
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🪨Kirishima🪨
unironically sends messages that just say "rawr". uses the :} face a lot bc he thinks it looks like his unbreakable.
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🐙Mezou Shoji🐙
i feel like he has such a low screentime that if anyone needs to text him he's only available for like an hour a day. accidentally leaves ppl on read. messages seem very bland usually.
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❄️Shoto Todoroki🔥
another bland person but tbh hes the worst out of them all. like he can look at a whole paragraph asking him if he wants to go to the movies with the rest of the class and all he will reply with is just "ok." uses periods at the end of every message but I swear he's not mad.
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💥 Bakugo💥
if he receives any messages past 8pm the "reply" will be you getting left on delivered even if he's still up, or a message just saying "shut the fuck up and go to bed.". also bland but he's more of a "k" bland rather than a "ok." bland.
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🥦Izuku Midoryia🥦
he will not even kidding receive a message that just says "hi" and will send a whole paragraph that is basically just a lengthened "hi! how are you?". uses the smiley emoji a lot.
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💫Momo Yaoyorozu💫
lots of ! at the end of messages, you can feel the happiness through your phone screen. uses heart emojis at the end of messages and memorizes the meaning of each color so she can use them accordingly.
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🖤Shihai Kuroiro🖤
another :} user, sometimes uses :] but mainly :}. only ever texts ppl at hours like 2-4 am. you cant convince me he gets enough sleep.
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👔Neito Monoma👔
you think hed text you?/j kinda just an average texter, any message about class 1a will be in all caps.
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😈Dabi😈
oh look. another bland ass texter, at least he takes the time to actually type out "okay," only sends emojis if he's talking about how weird the emoji looks.
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🔪Himiko Toga🔪
uses :] all the time. not :}, or :). just :]. if anyone texts her, even if its just a simple "hi." and she isn't busy, congrats you've agreed to a 3 hour face time call.
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✋Tomura Shigaraki✋
he leaves everyone on read. if you question why he left you on read all you're getting is an "if its so important then talk to me face to face."
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🃏Mr. Compress🃏
so you know how earlier i said you were lucky Iida didnt start with "I hope this message finds you well,"? your luck ran out. he writes it like you're a long distant friend who he is sending some fancy ass shit letter to. not even kidding ends each message with "--Compress."
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🪽Hawks🪽
types so fast his phone doesnt even register his hands. half his messages be looking like "se tht ouds ood". he doesn't even bother to edit it or correct himself.
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👁️Aizawa👁️
he texts like a dad. texting this mf be like:
"ok👍"
"*photo of a weird boat*"
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🌙Midnight🌙
miss girl uses so many ;) that its hard to tell if shes suggesting something weird or not. ended every greetings message with that one kissy emoji.
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🙂Mirio Togata🙂
uses the 🙂 all the time because he thinks it looks like him. it does.
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🌀Nejire Hado🌀
lots of !!! and :D, also uses the :> a lot lol. lots of blue heart emojis aswell.
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🦋Tamaki Amajiki🦋
sends articles about different butterflies he likes or thinks the person he sends it to would like along with a message along the lines of "I think this fits you :]". rarely texts first but when he does he clicks send and sitts on the other side of the bed as his phone while staring at it intensely, just waiting for the reply notif. wont actually read the reply for a good minute.
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🐈‍⬛Hitoshi Shinsou🐈‍⬛
sends photos of random animals he sees while out and about. usually just cats. (no way this man doesn't feed the strays around ua) another person that only texts at night time.
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🛠️Mei Hastume🛠️
uses >:D a lot, shows blueprints of her new babies all the time, ngl they are usually rlly messy. texts are just :
"LOOK AT THIS NEW BABY IN PROGRESS >:D"
"* incomprehensible image of a blueprint *"
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⭐Yo Shindo⭐
uses the thumbs up way to much but like in the passive aggresive way yk? but also if you send him a photo of something ur proud of he will reply with a simple "oh that's cool!" but there's so much fucking emotion behind it ur just kinda like ???
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🛡Melissa Shield🛡
her messages are so sweet. sunset pictures of the ocean every other day. lots of :).
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wrote this is one go and now my hands hate me. i think this was at least 20 characters-? idk I'm struggling to count.
878 notes · View notes
asumofwords · 8 months
Text
Common Factors - Michael Gavey x Reader
Synopsis: Part 2 of Midpoint, though can be read as a standalone. Michael Gavey asked you out for a drink and you had surprisingly agreed. Will you be able to tolerate each others wit without bickering, or will you lose yourself to him once more?
Warnings: This fic is 18+, readers discretion is advised. Public fingering, teasing, degradation, name calling, voyeurism, dumbification, finger fucking, biting, bratty reader. This is porn with barely any plot.
Word Count: 6k
Notes: Hello my angels, I know you have all been waiting so patiently for part two of Midpoint and here it is! Now I can't say that there will be a third/final chapter, but I may have ideas for it. No promises though. Saltburn has made me so nostalgic, I miss MSN messenger and MySpace. I miss the early 2000s so much, the tackiness of it, how everything was just to the max. Lmao. I also miss Tamagotchis. *Sigh*, nostalgia. Anywayyyyy, thanks for your patience and I hope you enjoy! <3
Part 1 - Midpoint
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When Michael had asked you out for a drink, or rather asked if you wanted to get a drink, it was not really a distinct question of going on a date with him or not, and perhaps you were arguing semantics right now, but that was besides the point.
He had thought that you would go right after your little event in the library. His eagerness was riddled by anxiety, clear for anyone, not that there was anyone in the vicinity, to see or hear, you hoped. 
You had shifted awkwardly for a moment, feeling his spend slide down you thigh in the large hole he had ripped in your stockings, explaining that you wouldn’t be able to go that evening.
He wilted.
It strummed a cord in your chest, and so you quickly explained that it was because of said issue between your legs, and not that you didn’t want to see him again. The fire in his eyes lit up again, and for a moment, the hair on the back of your neck stuck up. It felt as if you were about to be confronted once more by his obnoxious spite, though thankfully, and only because of your quick explanation, did he soften and you exchange details for your respected MSN Messenger accounts. 
The night after he was busy, apparently there was some sort of important chess tourney that he would be going to with his friend, you were unaware that he had any, and so he proposed the night after. But the night after you had told your best friend that you would bus into the city centre to meet with her, so that was no go as well.
You both thankfully settled on the Friday later that week, agreeing to meet at the small pub you frequented, which you found he did too. Each time the computer dinged at his reply, a thrill of excitement crawled through you. He was rather curt in his messages, but eager, and would often would send moving emojis at the end, which you saved and would send back.
Friday rolled around quickly, and you found yourself eager to see him again. You spent a solid two hours fretting over what to wear, deciding that pants or tights were not an option this time despite the cold weather.
You settled on a cute little outfit, the skirt of it coming to your mid thigh, looking at yourself in the mirror as you left before triple checking your computer and Nokia for any messages to say he was late, or couldn’t come, but none came. The last message he had sent to you, was a smiling thumbs up that moved largely across your screen agreeing to see you at 7pm sharp. 
You left early, earlier than what was needed, and sped walked the entire way to the pub, pulling your large jacket tightly around you, scarf covering the lower half of your face. The air was particularly crisp that evening, and by the looks of it, it may snow later, and although it was quite cold, you could see from afar that the pub was full, the winter air not deterring them. 
When you opened the door, the stale stench of its beer soaked floorboards filled your senses, loud music and even louder people, drinking and smoking and laughing in large groups without any care for the world. You knew that break would soon enough be coming to an end, and all the students would now be slowly making their way back, spending their last days or weeks of break with friends on campus and the establishments surrounding. 
The air inside the venue was stuffy, and almost wet with condensation, and as you rose on your tip toes, looking over the heads of others at their tables, or at the bar, you struggled to spot the familiar sandy blonde hair from your library, and the glasses that sat perched on his sharp nose. 
You pulled out your Nokia, checking the time and also checking for any messages. 
It was 6:57.
You were early.
But not too early.
Heading straight for the bar, you ordered yourself a drink, eyes drifting back over the pub, looking at the faces to see if you could see him with anyone. When again, you didn’t spot him, you told yourself not to panic, and instead decided that you would find yourself a spot to sit. There was table in the far corner, away from most, its surface was cleared bar a half drunken pint, hidden in the shadows and pressed against the wall between two larger tables, filled with people. You paid for your drink, and headed straight for the empty seat, winding past the pulled out chairs and wafts of smoke.
You were halfway there when a figure popped into your periphery. Your eyes locked onto a pair of familiar blue ones, a twitching smile pulling at his sharp yet plump lips. He came towards you from the direction of the loo, and you watched as he wiped his hands down the sides of his pants despite them looking dry.
“Hey.” You smiled, stopping short of the table, to awkwardly look up at him as he made his way over.
“Hi.” 
You shifted awkwardly around each other before you leant forward to give him a hug, he wrapped one arm around you stiffly in reciprocation, before pulling back to straighten, eyeing the drink in your hand.
“You get me one?” Michael nodded his head to your drink.
Your brows furrowed softly, “Uh, no. I wasn’t sure if you were here.”
Michael hummed, “I’m never late.”
Here we go again, you inwardly sighed. This is just what you didn't need. Another run in with his attitude.
“I wasn’t to know that.”
Michael stared at you a moment longer before turning away to the bar. You watched him awkwardly, yet somehow confidently, move through what little people stood at the counter waiting, standing rod straight as he ordered himself another pint. As he waited, you took your seat on the side where the half drunk beer wasn’t, back to the wall and completely cornered in. 
When Michael came back, beer in hand, you let yourself graze your eyes over him. You couldn’t stifle the laugh that exploded from your lips. He frowned as he sat opposite you, a tinge of defensiveness showing on his strong features.
“What?” He almost sneered, watching as you brought a hand to your mouth to try and cover it up.
“I’m sorry,” You giggled again, having to look at the ceiling for two seconds, trying to compose yourself, pushing a breath out shakily, “Your shirt.”
You began to laugh again, watching him as he looked down at it, inspecting it for a stain or hole.
“What’s wrong with my shirt?” He asked clinically, not finding a rip or hole or bird shit which he had suspected was there for a moment on the material.
You bit your bottom lip and giggled again, “It’s awful.”
Tucked into his cargo pants and black leather belt was one of the worst shirts you had ever laid eyes upon. It was white, and in big font on the front, it read ‘Weapon of Math Instructions’. On it, small drawings of calculators, protractors, and sums surrounded the large font.
In a quieter voice this time, he replied, “I got it for my birthday.” He picked up the sweating beer to bring to his lips, the foam coating his mouth as he drank deeply.
You felt a tinge of regret for laughing at him so openly, even though it was admittedly the worst shirt you had ever seen, “Do you enjoy maths puns, Gavey?” You tried to sound flirtatious, but in the moment you sounded more unsure than anything.
Michael took the beer away from his lips, swiping the back of his hand against his mouth, “If they’re funny. Why?”
“Do you have more shirts like this?” You tried to contain your mirth and failed.
The curiosity melted away, and a stony expression slipped over his face, “You’re taking the piss.”
You shook your head, heart speeding up, “No! No, sorry, Michael. I swear I’m not, I just, I wanted to- I’m trying-“
“-For someone whose degree relies heavily on the english word, you sure do struggle to find them.” The smirk on his lips was a thinly thing that indicated that he was being playful, but if he hadn't of smirked, you wouldn't have known. His tone was flat, his body posture stiff, and not once did he laugh, but you knew him.
And it more intimate than you would have liked.
Tongue in cheek in you leant back in your chair, feeling a comfortable little bubble surround you, the tension that was there only simmering in the background now, and not drowning you in it.
“How was the chess tourney?” You took a sip from your drink as he watched you.
“Fascinating, if it’s something of interest.”
His answer surprised you,.
“And was it of interest?”
“TBD.”
You took another sip of your drink, “My nan used to play chess with me when I was little.” 
This seemed to peak Michael’s interest greatly, “You can play?”
You shook your head humbly, smiling, “I can play, though I’m probably not very good.”
“We should play.” His answer was so immediate, so abrupt, that you could only blink before remembering to reply.
“What, now?”
Michael raised his brows at you as though you were intellectually stunted, “Do you see any chess boards in this shit hole?”
You breathed sharply through your nose, “No.” You said more afronted than intended, “I was just asking-“
“-You ask a lot of questions but don’t know what ones you want the answers for.”
Annoyance began to bloom in your chest, “I thought we were done with this tit-for-tat nonsense. Or did you want a round two, Gavey?”
A soft blush spread across his cheeks, and you knew you had him.
“Are you going to ask me about my day?” You cheeked, enjoying the way he flustered slightly, and then held back an angry sneer.
“How was it?”
“How was what?”
Michaels jaw tensed, and you bit your inner cheek to not smile, “Your day.”
A large grin spread across your lips along with a false expression of realisation, “Oh, my day! My day was fine, thank you, Michael. I did some reading, I did some study, and then I got myself ready to have drinks with a right git.”
Michael sucked his teeth loudly, “You’re funny. Should be a comedian instead of studying them.”
“You’re cute,“ You countered, “Should smile more instead of sneer.”
“I thought you said we were done with this nonsense.”
“I did, and I am. Starting…. Now.” You smiled widely, bringing your drink up to toast. 
Michael looked at you oddly, then to the glass in your hand before finally he brought his up, connecting the two cups.
You smiled wider, proud to be ready to say something you know will interest him,“‘If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough.’”
Michael's glass slammed down onto the table, his body leaning towards you in palpable excitement, “How do you know that?” His voice was eager, like you had lit a flame inside of him.
You smiled smugly, sipping on your drink, proud of yourself to have garnered such a reaction, “Learnt it with my degree. Einstein wasn’t just a man of maths. He was an important part of modern history. Especially regarding his involvement, or I should say rather, his non-involvement in the Manhattan Project.”
Michael's eyes lit up behind his glasses before he picked up his beer and thrust it against yours again, “Glad they’re teaching you something of importance.”
You huffed and laughed and sipped, watching as Michael settled his chair closer to you. It felt as if a door had been opened, and suddenly you were able to step inside the world that was Michael Gavey.
“You know,” You smirked, feeling heat from him beside you, chairs still apart, but bodies leant towards each other, “Art and History is just as important as Maths and Science.”
Gavey looked as though you had declared that the Earth was flat. It was a peculiar little look that made you want to lean across the space and press your lips squarely against his.
“I’m being serious.” You continued, “Without art, without history, the world would be a lot more boring than it is now.”
Michael pursed his lips at you, “Whatever helps you rationalise your choice of degree.”
You sipped your drink, eyes watching him over the rim of your glass, “I’ll let that slide. Only because I know you like watching me get riled up.”
“You’re rather confident of yourself this evening.” He commented, his blue eyes gleaming behind his glasses.
“And you’re rather goading. Not that that’s out of the ordinary.”
His fingers strummed against the table as he looked at you, eyes roaming over your body, “You look nice.”
“I would say the same, but I hate lying, and that shirt is an abomination.” You teased, bumping your shoulder into his lightly.
He smiled.
When did it become this?
How did it become so easy for you to melt into this conversation with him of all people?
Only earlier this week the two of you were at each others throats, snarling and fighting, and now here you were, seated beside each other, making little jokes and sitting intimately close. 
“Careful. Tit-for-tat.” Michael warned you, and you rolled your eyes playfully with a huff.
It seemed to please him, and soon enough you were moving through a smooth conversation. He mostly asked you about your studies and friends, and even asked about your family.
And you learnt about his. A fairly standard, run of the mill family. One sister, and an older brother, had a dog growing up, and now has a fish. 
But soon enough the conversation drifted back to your studies.
“Are you looking forward to term starting again?” You asked.
You felt as though he would be, his desire for learning and studying was clear whenever he spoke about it. He was passionate, and it was something that you admired about him. Or at least, now you did.
Michael shrugged, “I’m looking forward to graduating.”
This confused you.
“Why?”
Michael frowned, “Why do you think? I’m second in our year, I barely need to study-“
“-All you do is study, Michael.”
“Because there’s not much else to do here, I don’t have friends like you do.” Michael sneered the word friends, and immediately you knew who he was referring to.
“Michael-“
“-It’s different for us. People who aren’t ‘in’. Theres no parties, or accolades, only our degree.”
“You know that I’m not-“
“-I know that you don’t think you are, but whether you like it or not, they consider you one of them.”
You frowned. You didn’t like hearing that, especially with what Farleigh had said to you. You hated it because whilst it was wrong, it was still true. You did get invited to the parties, you had them all on MySpace and MSN, and even had their numbers in your phone. But for you, it was different, and Michael knew it.
You pushed your tongue against the side of your mouth, “I’ll bring you as my plus one to the next party. Then you can see that you’re not missing out on much.”
“You’d be seen with me in public? With them watching?” He said it with a laugh, though it was entirely humourless.
Your head tilted to the side, “We’re in public right now, aren’t we?” You looked around the pub, watching the many faces around you before settling back onto his. His expression was unreadable, until finally-
“We are in public.” He smirked. Gavey downed the rest of his beer quickly, all but slamming his glass onto the table, though not loud enough to garner any attention from the other patrons.
Michaels hand grabbed the seat of your chair and pulled it roughly towards him. You let out a squeak of surprise as your seat shifted against the floor suddenly, almost making you lose your balance. 
“Michael!”
“What?” He asked innocently.
“What are you doing?” Your heart began to quicken, his hand coming down to brush against your thigh as he intently stared at you from behind his glasses.
“I’m not doing anything.” His hand inched higher, grazing your inner thigh.
In a small panic, you lifted your gaze to the rest of the pub. Not one person had looked up when he dragged you to him, nor had anyone taken even the slightest bit of interest about the two students hidden in the dark corner table. Everyone in the pub was drunk and too absorbed by their own conversations and friends to notice anyone else.
“What’s wrong?” Gavey teased, voice dipping lower as he openly mocked you, his pinky finger skirting against the edge of your panties. 
Your brain had short circuited itself.
You were in public.
Where anyone could see.
And Michael had his hand under your skirt, teasing you.
This was what not what you would have expected from the man who was currently wearing a maths pun on his shirt. Your hand dropped under the table and grabbed his wrist tightly, stopping him from moving it any higher, though this didn’t prevent him from continuing to run his pinky back and forth under the elastic of your panties.
Heat coursed through you, and your core clenched around nothing. 
“What are you doing?” You asked breathlessly, a rhetorical question really. You knew just as well as he did exactly what he was doing. 
“I’m not doing anything.”
“Gavey.”
“I’ll tell you what,” He smirked again, eyes locked onto your face, watching as you struggled internally, “You sit there and be a good girl for me, and when we go back to your room, I will give you what you want.”
You blinked.
Michael squeezed your thigh roughly, “Use your words.”
“Okay.” You breathed.
“Okay what?”
“Yes.” Your blood pumped loudly in your ears, air struggling to get inside of you as you squirmed in anticipation. 
“Yes, who?”
You wet your lips with your tongue, mouth suddenly feeling dry, “Yes, Michael.”
He could be so demeaning so quickly. Like a switch was flicked. He went from this awkward, sneering maths genius to a cold and domineering man who could pull any response he liked from you.
“Better.” He smiled, “Now,” Swiftly Michael tugged your panties to the tide, two fingers immediately grazing your centre. You jerked as he slowly dragged his fingers through your folds and up to your clit.
You were soaked.
“Tell me what they’ve taught you about Einstein, since you want to use his words as a toast.” He looked you in the eyes as your breath caught on itself, his fingers swirling around your bud slickly. 
Michael suddenly paused, stilling his fingers, “Unless you only used him to try and impress me?”
Irritation coursed through you alongside frustration, “I didn’t use him to im-“ Your voice stilted as he began to rub his fingers against you again.
“To what?” He mocked you.
“I-Impress you. We learnt abou-t him and his wife recently.”
“The wife he divorced?”
“Yes.” You grit through your teeth, pleasure winding powerfully through you. Your toes curled in your shoes, stomach clenching as his fingers dipped back down to your entrance, scooping up more of your slick to drag back to your bud. Your eyes flittered around the pub, checking nervously to see if anyone had noticed what was going on underneath the table. 
No-one had.
“Surely you can find the words to tell me more?” One long finger suddenly pressed inside of you, causing you to gasp loudly, hands gripping the edge of the table tightly, “Or are you dumb already?”
“H-his wife was a brilliant physicist,” You struggled to control yourself as he crooked the long finger inside of you, curling it up against your inner walls, “And a-a mathematician.”
“Was she now?”
“Yes. Mileva Marić. They were married for a decade, and he-“ All thoughts escaped you as Michael added a second finger with the first, the stretch pressing into you deliciously as he immediately hooked his digits. You blinked mouth agape whilst looking at him, feeling your face become flushed. 
His eyes were half lidded as he watched at you intently, watching your every reaction, testing and teasing to see what made you tick, eager to make you come undone.
This was affecting him as much as it was you. 
Only he didn’t care for others catching on.
His stare urged you to continue.
“H-he was cruel to her.” You muttered, brain struggling to catch up.
Michael hummed, “Most men of historical notice were. It was the norm.”
“It doesn’t m-mean that it was okay.”
“No. But a man such as him surely deserves more merit in your eyes.” As his fingers crooked into you, slowly rubbing the spongy patch inside, his thumb pressed against your bud, causing you to shift your hips towards him, grinding down on his hand as you breathed a breathy moan, “Einstein did things that no men could.”
“I-if it was all his w-work to begin with.” You argued weakly, unable to keep your voice sturdy.
“What do you mean?” Michael’s interest halted his hands movement, but this lapse in control only lasted a moment before he corrected himself and began again.
“M-Mileva scored higher than him in applied physics. Five to his one. I-It's believed she helped him complete equations that he couldn’t without the credit. I-It's why he promised her the money f-from his Nobel Prize.”
The mans fingers slowed down their ministrations as he digested your stuttered information, the coil within you already beginning to tighten, “Fascinating.” He breathed, edging closer to you, “Tell me more.”
“Many women-” Michaels thumb began to quicken, halting your thoughts abruptly, your hands still clutching the edge of the table, knuckles aching.
“Many women, what?” He parroted you meanly, “Don’t tell me you’re close already, are you?”
You swallowed thickly, not willing to open your mouth lest a moan or gasp fall out. Michael chuckled quietly, his fingers quickening the pace within, causing you to arch towards him and grind down against his hand again. His arm subtly moved against you, and if anyone in the pub looked, they would surely know what was going on.
“Look at you,” He cooed, his other hand brushing hair behind your ear, “Already so close.”
You whined, trying to shift closer to him and his hand, if that was even possible.
“Does it turn you on that I’ve got my hand in your cunt for all to see?” He purred, “If someone just turned around right,” His fingers pulled out from you momentarily, moving up to your clit where he pinched it between thumb and forefinger, causing you to jerk, “Now, and looked closely enough, they’d be able to see how you’re desperately grinding down against my fingers.”
Your core clenched around him at his words.
“Oh, you do like it.” He tutted, “Such a dirty little whore.”
You whined again, “Michael I-“
“Shhh, don’t you worry that pretty, little, empty head.” He cooed, emphasised by swift rubbing circles on your bud, “I’ll take care of you, but only if you behave.”
You nodded desperately, feeling yourself get closer and closer to the edge. You would do anything. You were desperate at this point. The week of waiting for him had filled you with anticipation, and meant you spent most of your nights with your fingers or vibrator between your thighs thinking about him and your last meeting in the library.
Michael watched you nod and grind down on his hand, his pace slowing so that you couldn’t get much out of it besides a slow and steady buzz of pleasure.
He seemed to think for a moment, deliberating, before an almost cruel smirk pulled at his lips.
“Do you know your times tables?” He asked, fingers almost still at this point, only languidly moving to keep you riled, or to remind you of what he was doing.
You could scarcely think, scarcely exist without feeling as though you were at any moment about to come undone, his hands keeping you just at the precipice. Your mind was hazy, and any and all thoughts of substance had seemed to escape you.
“Use your words.” He encouraged you in a demeaning manner.
“Y-Yes.”
“Good. Not just a pretty face then.” The backhanded comment could have made you smile, “We are going to play a game.”
Could have.
Your eyes widened slightly, hands dropping down to clutch the underside of the table, “A game?”
“Yes.” He gave you an encouraging smile, “Good job. A game.” He was treating you like you were a child who is only just beginning to understand a basic concept, “I’m going to ask you an equation, and you’re going to answer it. If you’re correct, you get a reward. If not,” He paused, fingers teasing you again, “You get punished. Do you understand? Or do I need to dumb it down for you?”
The way he was speaking to you, so meanly, so smugly, made you clench harder around his fingers.
You liked when he was mean to you.
“Answer me. Yes or no.”
“Y-yes.”
“Good girl. Alright,” His hand paused its movements, pulling his fingers out to just rest lightly against your bud, barely touching you, “What is the sum of seven times nine? I’ll use small numbers so that it doesn’t confuse you.”
Slowly, you did the maths in your head, “Sixty-three.”
Michael smirked, “Good girl.” You keened at the praise, and felt his fingers press a little harder into you, his movements beginning to start again slowly, though not enough to give you any pleasure.
“What is fifteen times six?”
Oh god. 
“Um,” You shifted, blinking rapidly to try and do the maths, but every time you got somewhere, Michael would press against you harder as if he knew, ruining your train of thought.
“Come on,” He teased with a swirl of his fingers, “That’s an easy one.”
-5 is 75, then-
“Ninety.” You gasped out.
“Good, good. So clever of you.” He cooed, though the sarcasm dripped from his lips. His fingers once again pressed harder, sparks of pleasure finally springing up inside of you. The sound of the pub was loud around you, and in the dim light, you could see that a blush had spread across his cheeks. 
“One more and then I’ll give you your reward. If you get it wrong, then you get nothing. Ready?”
You nodded shakily, chasing his hands with your hips. He tsk-ed you and stilled his hands, “Don’t be greedy.” You apologised softly and stilled, waiting for him to start again. 
"Twelve times seventeen.”
Oh God. 
What?
“M-michael, that’s not-“
“What? It’s easy enough. Even the thickest of people could get it. Though I suppose you’re getting all pretty and dumb for me anyway.”
“I-“
“How about this,” He smirked, and the way he did it caused you to sit on edge, “I’ll help you since you’re such a stupid little girl.” Michael plungers his fingers into you with no warning, immediately fucking them into you rapidly.
You sucked in air sharply, feeling the coil within begin to pull taught. 
“Twelve times fifteen is one-hundred-and-eighty. You need two more twelves. Do you know what two times twelve is?” 
Did you?
Jesus.
“I- It’s twenty four.” You answered shakily, surprised at your own voice.
“Twelve times seventeen?” He repeated the original question, “Oh dear, you really do have no brain.”
“N-No.” Your voice shook with how roughly and quickly Michael fucked you on his fingers, “Two times twelve.”
“Ah, clever little idiot. Go on now, what is one-hundred-and-eighty plus twenty-four.”
Your brain couldn’t do it, too hazy with how he was degrading you and how well he was touching you. You just wanted to cum. All you wanted was to cum. And then his thumb joined, swirling over your clit slickly as his fingers pistoned in and out of you, the sound of your wet rising from beneath the table. Your arousal pooled onto the back of your skirt and the wood of the seat.
“T-two-hundred-and-“ Michael pressed his thumb brutally against your clit suddenly, fire coursing through you, ruining your train of thought once again.
Damn him.
“Two-hundred-and what?”
Oh god.
“Two?”
Michael frowned at you, though you could tell that he was pleased, his fingers pulled away from you quickly, your eyes widening.
“N-No!” You grabbed his wrist keeping it against your inner thigh, his slick fingers pressing against your skin, “I-I-“
“Wrong answer.” He tutted, “You’re so fucking stupid. So fucking stupid and desperate, look at you.”
“Please, please,” You begged, clit throbbing, “I know- I know what the sum is. Please.” You pulled his hand back to your core, his fingers stiff as you ground against them desperately, “It’s two-hundred-and-four. Two-hundred-and-four. Michael, please.”
Michael’s fingers did not move, and watched you with entertainment as you desperately rubbed him against you. You needed to cum. You needed it. You didn’t care who saw. You didn’t care if it was degrading. You needed him. And you needed him now. 
“Look how fucking desperate you are.” He laughed, “So pathetic. Whining like a bitch in heat as you grind against my hand. Are you that desperate to be a little whore?”
“Yes. Please. Please, Michael. Please. I need it.”
“You need it?” He smirked.
You were so close, so so close, “Please, please.”
“Tell me you need me.” He breathed, face coming closer to yours, his breath fanning agains your lips.
You licked your lips again, swallowing thickly, “I need you.”
Gavey smiled toothily, “You’re so pathetic.”
And without a second thought, or really without even a first thought, you nodded in agreement, “I’m pathetic. Please. Please, Michael, I want you.”
“What will you do to get it?”
“Anything. Please.”
“Anything?” He asked again, eyes searching your face.
You nodded desperately, needing him more than you had ever needed something before “Please.”
“Okay.” His fingers slipped back into you as he breathed the word, almost as if he was bored, like fucking you with his hand in public was an all too boring affair.
Mundane.
Little to nothing coming out of it for him. But in that moment you didn’t care as the coil within began to wind again.
“Fuck.”
Michael leant forward, his lips beside your ear so that you could hear him clearly, “You’re going to cum on my hand in this disgusting little pub like the dumb, desperate, little slut that you are, and then you’re going to thank me for it. Understood?”
“Yes.” You whined, hand gripping his wrist as it pummelled into you, thumb brutally swiping your clit as his fingers brushed over the sensitive patch inside of you over and over. 
“You’re close already, aren’t you?” His lips brushed your neck, causing a shiver to roll through you.
“Fuck. Y-yes.”
Michael leant forward, his lips brushing against the skin beneath your ear, his sharp nose nuzzling into your hair before he bit down on you roughly, causing you to gasp. To anyone else in the pub it would have looked like an intimate gesture, a man trying to whisper something sweet into his dates ear, but to you, it was damning.
You were so close, so so close, and all it took was four little words to send you over the edge. Michaels tongue lapped at where he had bit you before he came back to your ear one last time.
“I own you now.”
Pleasure erupted through you, your release bursting from within. You jerked in your chair against him, tucking your head into the side of your neck as you hid your face, grinding down onto his had as you whimpered. Michael plucked pleasure from deep within you, his hand not once slowing, prolonging your orgasm. It was only when it began to subside did his hand slow as you breathed raggedly against his neck, slumped into your chair and against him.
Your heart thumped against your ribs as you panted, and gently Gavey withdrew his fingers from within you, a wince falling from your lips from oversensitivity before he pulled your panties back into place.
Michael cooed you gently, “Good job.” Almost inaudible in the loud of the pub, “So good f’me.”
Fatigue washed over you like a wave, crashing into you so fiercely that you didn’t have the strength to sit up yet. You were fucked out, mind thinking of absolutely nothing as you nuzzled your face into his neck further, breathing in his scent.
“Hm,” Michael hummed, “You still with us?”
You hummed back in reply dreamily, only moving back when Michael pulled you away, watching you with half lidded gaze as he looked over your disheveled form. Michael laughed again, eyes crinkling in the corners as he brushed his hand against your cheek. Your first thought was how pretty he was when he smiled, and then you felt the wetness of your slick clinging to your skin crudely. 
With a curious touch, Michael moved his fingers across your lips, the taste of yourself tart and warm as he caressed you. You opened your mouth for him and let his fingers inside, immediately tasting yourself as he rubbed his digits against your tongue slowly as you held your mouth open for him, drool beginning to pool at your bottom lip. 
“Such a good little girl for me, aren’t you?”
You nodded lazily, small smile flicking at the edges of your lips. Michael pulled his fingers from your mouth and used his thumb to smear the saliva that had pooled at your bottom lip over lips messily.
He tutted, “Dirty girl.”
“Mmm.” You hummed in content.
Michael eyed your half drank drink, nodding towards it, “Finish it.”
You did as he bid, brining it to your lips as you kept your eyes on him, swallowing it quickly before placing the glass back on the table, a warm fuzzy feeling slipping over you, a little space that was warm and safe and cozy. Then Michael stood, rather abruptly, like he had remembered that he forgot to turn the stove off, chair hitting the wall behind him as he looked down below at you.
“Time to go.”
You stood, on shaky legs to follow, adjusting your skirt sheepishly, knowing that there would be a damp patch at the back but not caring enough to hide it. In a way, you wanted people to know what had happened, and in some ways your wish had come true. 
A table in the middle of the pub nearby had half of its eyes on you, whispers and smirks shared amongst one another, watching as Michael grabbed your hand to lead you through the crowd roughly. Wolf whistles and hoot’s were called after you, followed by rambunctious laughter. You weren’t sure if they had seen what was happening under the table, but you were sure they had seen his fingers in your mouth. 
The door to the pub was swung open as Michael pulled you out sluggishly behind him. As you stood in the crisp air he spun you abruptly, grabbing your face as he pressed his lips to yours, his tongue immediately swiping against yours, trying to taste your essence that lingered there. Michael groaned into the kiss, pressing his body against you, where finally you could feel how much what had transpired had affected him. He pulled back, restraining himself as his sharp nose bumped into yours as he moved. 
And then he was gone, stepping away from you as he began to walk away. You stood dumbfounded as you watched him, snow beginning to fall from the sky. 
Do you go after him? Was this it? Did he just use you in the pub only to humiliate you out the front? 
A wave of confusion and hurt washed over you, but before it could turn to anger, he stopped and faced you again, a soft smirk on his lips.
“You coming? You said anything.”
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pastanest · 7 months
Text
Spencer Reid x gn!reader
A/N: been gone for a hot minute due to personal circumstances but just wanted to drop a lil something (that anyone who watches Doctor Who will be able to tell I started writing a BIT ago given the references here lol) to let you guys know I’m still kickin it <3
warnings: slight hint at an age gap but nothing specific
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A Smile
You can imagine the rest of the team would be floored to hear that Spencer has actually exchanged texts with you on a multitude of occasions, outside of professional settings. Numbers were swapped on your first day, naturally, and to begin with you only dared text Spencer if you had absolutely no other choice (if another member of the team could text him, you’d busy yourself to ensure they would, rather than ask you, to save you the embarrassment). But, ever since the first occasion that you texted Spencer a random question out of hours - regarding trivia you definitely hadn’t spent a concerning amount of time deciding on before you sent it to him - you have formed a bond that’s unspoken beyond typed words.
You: so, are you looking forward to the 60th Anniversary? :P
As you hit send, you roll onto your bed, grinning giddily down at your phone. In no more than a few seconds, your screen tells you that your beloved genius is already typing back to you, and within a minute, you receive the paragraph you’d anticipated.
Spencer: Absolutely. The revival of Russel T. Davies’ era, coupled with the return of Murray Gold’s legendary scores, are sure to ignite the spark of nostalgia that the show has been missing for some time. In particular, I am looking forward to seeing how Russel will format this new regeneration of the Doctor, and how many references to his predecessors will decorate the anniversary episodes, especially. I take it you are excited for the anniversary episodes, too, hence the question?
His formality and enthusiasm being conveyed in a way that is so distinctly Spencer, even over text, is enough to have you giggling. You know by now that if you ask something about one of Spencer’s interests, whether it be facts, statistics, generalized trivia, questions, literature, Star Trek or, in this case, Doctor Who, there is no way he can downplay his excitement.
You: knew it! :D and yeah, I'm super excited!!
Mostly, you are thrilled by the thought of discussing the episodes at great length with Spencer for weeks after they’ve aired, but you keep that safely in the subtext of your conversation.
Spencer: Of course you knew. Perhaps we could share a live commentary on the anniversary episodes, if we’re not otherwise engaged with a case?
Only Spencer Reid can make your heart stop with a suggestion like that. Before you can consider any consequences, you are frantically typing back to him.
You: I’d love that! will the commentary be by text or call?
He is typing the moment your message reaches him, his ability to read at what you consider to be the speed of light making for a wonderfully speedy texting partner in every conversation you have.
Spencer: Either is fine, but if we aren’t away on a case, I must admit the idea of experiencing the episodes together in person would be most preferable. It eradicates the risk of our viewings not being synced up or our call connection potentially spoiling the immersion. What do you think?
And just like that, he’s stopped your heart again. In fact, you truly have to consider whether Spencer Reid has figured out a means of reaching through his phone to yours, to snatch your heart right out of your chest. As though he hadn’t already stolen it on the day you met.
You: I think you’re right, like always, Doctor Reid :P
That’s a rational reply, you think. Not too eager. Not the resounding ‘yes’ that every fiber of your being is screaming. In the chess game that is how-to-text-Spencer-Reid, you have marked yourself as the queen. He’d tell you that’s not how chess works, but he’d probably also agree.
Spencer: I’m far from right “always”, but I very much appreciate that you think so.
You’re about to reply, when another text appears on your screen.
Spencer: (:
Doctor Spencer Reid has double-texted you. And, not only that, he’s sent you a smiley face. This is unprecedented. Your jaw drops.
You: omg you did not just send that
Honestly, your life is flashing before your eyes as you lie on your bed. Is this the power of your influence? Could you truly indoctrinate older men into sending emojis? Could this really be you?
Spencer: I most certainly did. I’ll even do it again.
Spencer: (:
He had to send it as a separate text. He couldn’t just add the smiley face to the end of his original message. No, of course he couldn’t.
You: omg who are you!!
You’re laughing now. Actually, properly laughing at the ridiculousness of this situation. Wait until Penelope hears about this.
Spencer: I don’t think these suit me very much, but they are fun. What about this one - 🙂
This is going too far. You’ve played God. You’ve flown too close to the sun. You’ve created a monster in the form of Spencer Reid using emojis while still being so formal. Still, you can’t deny that this is perhaps the funniest conversation you have ever had, with anyone, specifically because it perfectly demonstrates the unique humor shared between the two of you.
You: woah! careful! don’t push it, genius!!
And, in response to that, Spencer Reid is left with a philosophical question he has never before pondered: how does one convey sincere laughter via text? This reply takes him the longest, because he has to consider it very carefully. He wants it to indicate how funny he did find your message, and does find you, in general. He wants it to be obvious in its intent and impossible to misunderstand. So, after four minutes, you receive a text that has you laughing so hard you very nearly fall off of your bed.
Spencer: Haha.
Sometimes, that’s simply how your text conversations with Spencer end. While he does, generally, prefer a more traditional ending in the form of a goodnight text (that he actually makes the effort to sign off with a “- Spencer x”, like it’s a handwritten letter), he enjoys the nuances of an open end, on the basis it means a conversation with you doesn’t have to end. Only has to pause, temporarily, until one of you picks it back up again. There is something poetic, Spencer thinks, to the notion of you being his constant both in metaphor and literally in a text conversation that isn’t formally closed. That door is left open to you, much like the door to his heart is.
And that night, he closes his eyes with a smile on his face at the thought of you, everything you are, everything you make him feel. Everything that makes you, you, and how that makes you everything to him.
A text could never truly convey the heaven that you bring to him by existing, but just like proposing plans to watch Doctor Who with you, it’s a good place to start.
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comet-forgot-you · 1 month
Note
walk with me here, college popular girl amber + quiet masc-ish reader who she takes an interest in. teasing and flirting and Ummmm maybe reader first kiss and first time with amber being super sweet and teaching reader how to touch her .. In the backseat of a car maybe. yeah i’m going insane
im also going insane thank you!!!!
smut. 18+ pls.
do not repost for any reason.
amber noticing you around campus, never able yo talk to you because she’s always with someone. she wants to talk to you so bad, you had her attention and you didnt even know it. it wasn’t until the second semester that she was able to finally talk to you. she saw you in her psych class, one free chair beside you and she took it despite the row in front of you being completely empty.
she wouldn’t know how to talk to you at first, secretly hoping you would talk to her first, but you don’t. you hardly look at her and it makes her so mad. two weeks into the semester and she finally talks to you.
“hey, i like your shirt.” of course she does, its a stab shirt. you glance down at it, forgetting what shirt you were wearing the moment the compliment falls from her lips.
“thank you,” you reply quietly, a faint blush creeping up on your cheeks.
“you’re cute,” she mumbles, turning her attention to the professor as he begins the lecture.
that cycle continues until amber finally gets your number, and then she’s sending you flirty texts, only to tease you about it later in class. then you surprise her when you make the first move, asking her out on a date.
she agrees almost immediately, saying something along the lines of “ive been waiting for you to ask.” it makes your cheeks heat up as you look away from her.
one date turns into another, the two of you are walking around a park in the middle of the night, asking each other questions. the two of you end up underneath a streetlight and amber stops walking, standing in front of you. she wraps her arms around your neck, head tilting slightly as she looks between your eyes and lips.
“have you ever kissed anyone?” your cheeks flush, you hadn’t, and you were slightly embarrassed about it. you consider lying to her, but something about the way she looks at you has you muttering out the truth.
“no.”
amber smiles, leaning in closer to you. “can i kiss you?” your hands find their place on her hips and you swallow thickly, nodding slightly. she smiles, leaning in to press a kiss against your lips.
her lips are soft, her arms tightening as she pulls you closer into her. your grip on her hips tighten slightly. she pulls away and you cant help but smile. the next day your asking her to be your girlfriend, and she teases you, “i thought i was gonna have to ask.”
weeks later, the two of you are driving around in her car, talking about anything and everything. she pulls into an empty parking lot, telling you how tired she was of driving. you offered to switch with her, but she’s quick to shut it down, you two dont have to drive around.
next thing you know shes leaning over the center console, kissing you like she needs you. and she does. she crawls into your lap, holding your face in her hands as she kisses you hungrily. “need you so bad,” she whispers against your lips. “do you know how hard it is seeing you look so good and having to keep myself from pouncing on you? i need you so bad, baby.” you swallow thickly at her confession.
“i don’t.. i’ve never..”
“i’ll teach you, promise.”
“what if im not good?”
“you’ll never know until your try.” you swallow thickly, amber takes your hand, massaging your palm with her thumb. “do you want to try?”
you nod, “yes,” its a weak answer, but its all amber needs before she’s guiding your hand to her clothed cunt. you cup it and amber rolls her hips against your hand.
she moves to undo her pants but you’re quick to shoo them away, wanting to do it on your own. you slip your hand into her underwear, feeling just how wet she was. you exhale shakily, “fuck.”
amber grabs your wrist, pushing your hand further into her pants. you spread her sticky folds, running your fingers through her wetness. amber hisses. you prod at her entrance and amber’s holding back a whimper that threatens to escape.
“use one at first,” she whispers. you do as she says, pushing one finger into her cunt. your movements are slow as you pump in and out of her. you curl your finger and amber lets out a moan. “another.” you sink another finger into her cunt, slowly pumping in and out of her. “good girl,” she whispers.
you shudder at the praise, you bury your head into her neck, nipping at the skin. her grip on your wrist tightens as your palm grazes her puffy clit. “faster.”
you pick up your pace, curling your fingers every few strokes, amber moans. “like that?” you whisper out, searching for her approval. amber hisses, bringing her bottom lip between her teeth.
“fuck,” she breathes out, “yeah, yes. just like that, baby.” she rolls her hips against your palm, giving her clit the much needed attention. “doing so good, fuck,” she moans out.
her walls squeeze your fingers, is that a good thing? you ignore it, picking your pace up slightly. the sudden change has amber moaning loudly, “fuck!” it takes you by surprise, you pull away from her neck to watch her every reaction. her bottom lip is taken between her lips, you bring your free hand up to tug it out of it’s confines.
her cheeks are flushed, her tongue darts across her lips to wet them. you curl your fingers and amber’s moaning again, head falling back slightly. “yeah, just like that, baby. don’t stop, please,” she begs, her orgasm so close.
when she cums, her head falls against your own, your hot breaths mixing with each other. “fuck, you sure that was your first time? you did so good, baby,” she mumbles, her hips still rolling against your palm.
“thank you,” you mumble out and amber laughs, your cheeks flushing.
“you’re welcome.”
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Text
Tea Shop
Xie Lian x M!reader x Hua Cheng
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Y'all I've been thinking for ages how to make a two person scene a three person scene. What am I supposed to do, make two brides??? So if you have any ideas come bless me with them. 🫵🙃
Previous part: God of Song's second ascension
_____________________________________________
After you guide Xie Lian carefully out of the heavens so that he doesn't kill himself by accident . It takes a day to get to a tea shop. It could've taken longer, like three days but you saved yourselves sometimes. Since you can actually have spiritual prowess. The only reason it wasn't any quicker is because Xie Lian demanded you to not overwork yourself and use too much mana.
Xie Lian has always looked simple enough with plain, white robes. You on the other hand have to take on an 'avatar' you don't need anyone noticing you either. So you also dawn white robes, but of course a veil stays on.
You and Xie Lian sit at a table in the corner of the tea shop and you sit across from him. The two of you look over the scroll Ling Wen has given you... it isn't very helpful, but that's alright.
Both yours and Xie Lian's attention is captured by a silver butterfly. It flies across both of you and out the window. When you turn your head your heart almost drops out of your throat. Xie Lian is surprised as well to see two men sitting by you. One sat by you and the other sat by Xie Lian. There's only so much room on these benches after all.
You grimace at their presence. It's not hard to read the spiritual energy from them, they're obvious officials. You glare at them, Xie Lian is much kinder, "Oh uh who are you guys..?"
"Fu Yao" the one by you replies.
"Nan Feng" the one by Xie Lian replies.
You've never side eyed someone so hard in your endless years of life. At the 'Fu Yao' person beside you.
Ling Wen transmits a message to the two of you that they're volunteer officials. You huff inwardly. There's no way anyone from the upper court would offer their deputies from the middle court to help them.
That's because they aren't from the middle court though.
"Well I thank you for your help" Xie Lian says, quickly accepting their new guests.
"Which highnesses sent you?" You ask with narrowed eyes. You know they aren't deputies. Who are you to stress Xie Lian out more though, he already looks horrified when the officials answer his question.
"The palace of Nan Yang"
"The palace of Xuan Zhen"
"..."
Your glare only grows sharper. You've no clue why Mu Qing out of all people would want to help. You also have no idea why he would sit next to you of all people.
"Oh did your generals send you?" Xie Lian asks with a mouthful of tea.
"They didn't know we were coming" they answered in unison.
Xie Lian ponders for a moment, but you're quick to make the two squirm. Just because you can.
"Two officials from the lower court shouldn't go off without permission no? The trouble surely isn't worth it." Your eyes crinkle, as you smile at the two.
Lower court used to be what's now called the middle court. It was changed when whiny officials started complaining it made them seem trivial compared to officials in the upper court. To them an apparent mark to their honor. To you a pathetic attempt to seem important.
"..."
"..."
Your smile widens under your veil when they don't answer. What are they going to say? Their lack of words don't stop Fu Yao from glaring at you or from making Nan Feng squirm in his spot.
Xie Lian ever so kindly saves them, "Well do you know who we are?"
"You're his royal highness the crown prince and he's general /n"
"You're the justice of the mortal realm, the center of the world"
Mu Qing does not regard you at all and rolls his eyes when he answers.
Xie Lian chokes on his tea, "Did he just roll his eyes?"
" He did, tell him to scram" you and Nan Feng say together.
"Any official who was available was welcome to help so who are you to tell me to scram?" Fu Yao sneered. Again his words are only pointed at Nan Feng, not you.
"Ah well more help is better than none right?" Xie Lian smiles.
You sigh and all four of you go over the scroll together.
**********************************************************
Eventually it begins to get dark and all of you will need to find a place to sleep. Long ago, Xie Lian and you would sleep in the streets or on the ground. You put a stop to that. After becoming a powerful enough ghost and god you entreated yourself to your own palace. Not in the heavens though, you chose for it to be in the ghost realm. This was a while before Crimson Rain took over ghost city
Your palace just happened to be in close proximity to it and eventually ghosts started inhabiting themselves. Now all three realms call your palace, "The city of the lost". It's rarely talked about because well it's "lost" not many people find it, your city also doesn't cause trouble. It's just kinda there.
That is where you would usually go though but now you have two more officials with you and you'll be damned if you bring Mu Qing into your city.
"Why don't we find a temple of Nan Yang? I'm sure there's one around." You say, standing next to Xie Lian.
The four of you do eventually find one, it's a little run down but it's good enough. Your attention is dragged away when you notice a girl praying. A girl praying in a temple of Nan Yang? Makes you want to give your heart out.
You can't resist your temptations when Xie Lian asks why the temple has so many women worshippers. It's unusual for a martial god's temple after all. While Nan Feng feels the need to block the question, Fu Yao indulges it.
"I know what you want to ask, you want to ask why there's so many female worshippers right?"
You hold the urge to cackle, and lean in close to Xie Lian's ear. You happily ignore the two officials's glares. You whisper to him, "Xie Lian many women worship Nan Yang's temple so in the future their man will have... Good assets" you giggle into his ear.
For a martial god it isn't normal for many women to pray in their temples. Xie Lian was an exception because he was more of a ' feminine god ' depicted with lotus flowers. You were an exception because of femininity and because you're the God of song. The arts, like dance, drawing, and song were more partaken by women than men. Most martial gods don't have femininity, so rare for women's prayers.
You stay close to Xie Lian's side as Fu Yao judges the poor girl to pieces, calling her ugly. Xie Lian sighs, "You can't talk about girls like that Fu Yao" but you can tell Xie Lian is thinking the same thing. You snicker placing a hand on your hip.
Xie Lian notices a slash in the girl's dress, he tries to offer her his outer robe so that she can cover herself but of course she freaks out. She moves to slap Xie Lian but why would you just stand there? You grab her wrist and throw her to the side. 'throw' is an overstatement it was truly a nudge.
Once Xie Lian tells her she has a slash in her dress she finally accepts his robe and then runs out of the Temple.
Now Xie Lian's undressed. Bandages over his chest, and neck can be seen now. Nan Feng and Fu Yao stare in quiet shock. You on the other stare in admiration. Xie Lian is undeniably beautiful. You chuckle softly and remove your outer robe, unlike Xie Lian you have an under robe on. You move it over Xie Lian's shoulders.
"Should've let her run out with the slash in her dress. It's just like you to give the clothes off your back, A-Lian" you hum softly. Xie Lian smiles in thanks and puts on your robe.
He does look very pretty especially in your clothes.
**********************************************************
The next day all four of you go back to the tea shop. You aren't paying attention to the conversation about Mount Yunjin. You'd much rather pay attention to Wèizhī. The two birds hop around on the table and chirp away.
You decided to bring them today, simply because they bring you peace of mind. Of course they aren't only birds they're much more than that. Anyone would know if they're close to you, and they've seen the earring hiding behind your long hair.
Right now they're birds though and you'd much rather chirp away with the Magpies then pretend to chat with the officials next to you.
It isn't until loud drums and a gathered crowd outside has all four of you going outside to check it out. A line of men outside carrying a sedan is what the crowd is gathered for. As for the last inside the sedan... She looks like her neck has been snapped. It proves so when a fake head rolls to yours and Xie Lian's feet.
"Ew" you sneer and quickly kick it away. You assume whatever these mortals are doing is connected with the Ghost Groom. You stand to the side however as Wèizhī perches on your shoulders.
"If I was a ghost groom I'd kill the entire group for sending such an ugly thing to me" Fu Yao comments in disgust and rolls his eyes
"Fu Yao you aren't talking like an immortal should." Xie Lian said. "And can you fix that eye-rolling habit of yours? Why don't you set a small target for yourself first and only roll five days or something like that?"
" Set it fifty times a day and it still won't be enough!" Nan Feng yells
"Leave Fu Yao alone, if he rolls them hard enough maybe they'll fall out on their own." You add, with a snicker.
You're interrupted by yelling, one of the men in the group yelling about how it's useless and that they should just charge into Mount Yunjin and dragging an ugly freak out. They all hoot in agreement.
"Ugly Freak? Shopkeeper what are they talking about?" Xie Lian asks
The tea master explains, "The ghost groom has such an ugly appearance that no woman loves it, so he wears bandages around his face. That is why he kidnaps brides."
"Just because his face is wrapped in bandages doesn't mean it's ugly. There's a possibility it's so beautiful that it doesn't want others to see it, so he covers it up" Fu Yao says.
When Fu Yao quickly glances at you, you ignore. This isn't about you and you know that Fu Yao is truly a prick. No need to make something out of nothing.
Your group's attention is caught when the same girl from yesterday begging them not to go do anything dangerous and a man bitching at her because she refused to join them.
You don't care about anyone's affairs unless it has something to do with Xie Lian. You perk in attention when the man pushes the girl roughly, Xie Lian ever so kindly catches her.
Xie Lian uses Rou'ye to smack down the man and then just as quickly hides back in Xie Lian's sleeve. You snicker softly at the slumped man in the dirt. The man is not happy though, he's having none of it. He brandishes his sword and yells that Xie Lian is using wicked magic.
Nan Feng uses his palm to snap a wooden pillar of the tea shop and the group of men run in fear. You side eye Nan Feng. You have mixed opinions on him, but even after so long... "You're still just a brute dummy. You're paying for that" you smile behind the veil and return to Xie Lian's side.
The four of you eventually head back to the temple. With newly acquired information from Ling Wen, you now know that you're going to need a fake bride. However you can't use any mortals since it's a wrath level ghost.
"Well if we can't use women we'll have to use men" said Fu Yao.
"What man is going to want to dress up as a bride?" Nan Feng sighs.
The two suddenly have the same idea and look over to you and Xie Lian.
"???"
"No." You glare.
**********************************************************
Nighttime, the temple of Nan Yang.
You watch as Xie Lian walks from the back in a brides dress, hair down and flowing. You sigh into your hand. It doesn't look like a bride at all
Nan Feng has a more extreme reaction, "Fuck!" He just can't stand to see Xie Lian in a brides dress, it's awful.
Fu Yao scans Xie Lian with a complicated look.
"Do you have something you wish to say?" He asked
Fu Yao nodded "if someone sent a woman like this to me..."
"you'd kill the whole town was it?" You snicker.
"No I'd kill the woman." Fu Yao replied frigidly.
Xie Lian smiles, "Then thank goodness I'm not the woman."
You hum, "A-Lian let me help you, obviously these two have and never will see a bride in their lives" you smile, "not unless it's each other..." You mutter the last part out.
"Excuse me..." The four of them look at the voice. It's the girl from earlier. She has a white robe in her hand and stands with trepidation. "I've washed these clothes to return them to you and thank you so much for yesterday and today"
You see Xie Lian smiles in response but suddenly remembers his attire.
"Are you... if you want I can help?" She asks, no longer shy.
"No miss you misunderstand this isn't a hobby of mine" Xie Lian laughs nervously.
You on the other hand are happy with this development. "Yes! Come help us."
And so that began Xie Lian's makeover. The girl has a sewing kit on her and helps Xie Lian fit into his dress. You do Xie Lian's hair - you do it all the time anyways - and together the two of you do Xie Lian's makeup. After you're finished with him, he looks like a proper bride and a damn good one too. If you weren't a ghost there would be a blush on your cheeks.
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Guys. If anyone has actually read all of these parts I need y'all to tell me if Y/n is making sense. 😭 Like do we understand the background and his character? Do we understand the b i r d s?
Time gap between here and first glance
First Glance
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elspeth-tirel · 6 months
Text
New Phyrexia As A Cult
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Content Warnings: Heavy discussion of cults and cult recruitment, mentions of sexual coercion, abuse, gore in images (New Phyrexian art so if you’re good with that should be all clear)
I’ve seen many people talking about New Phyrexia with the release of Phyrexia: All Will Be One and March of the Machine. And I’ve seen people talk about the misconceptions of New Phyrexia, like assuming it’s a hivemind. Which leads me into the key point I wanted to discuss with this. New Phyrexia isn’t a hivemind, but there’s a reason it’s assumed to be one by most casual fans. I believe it’s most accurately conveyed as a cult, and that analysing and interpreting the specific ways it is like one has a lot of merit for how it is viewed. I’m also aware that most of what I’m saying isn’t new. Am I the first person to say New Phyrexia is a cult? No. But most of the time, I’ve seen people simply use it as a pejorative term to add on to the list of problematic buzzwords to attach when criticising New Phyrexia or the Praetors. And regardless of whether I agree with those people, I do feel it warrants much deeper exploration into why New Phyrexia is a cult.
I know this post likely will stir up a lot of people saying some not positive things about me and it but I felt it needed to be said. To those people who have a knee jerk reaction towards this and are going to immediately want to send me something criticising this, I don’t anticipate you’ll read all of this. But at the end of the document I did include a list of questions I anticipate a few readers will ask, and I would simply like to politely ask that you read that segment before sending anything to me or replying to this post.
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To start talking about cults and the nature of New Phyrexia as one, it’s first necessary to answer a few important background questions. Many people are going to ask if I have personal experience with a cult. To that, yes I have, I was raised in one from birth until around age 17. I would not like to discuss this further, I am simply including this so people know when I speak here I know what I am talking about. Another important thing is the definition of a cult. What differentiates a cult from any other religion? Many people disagree on the exact definition, and every now and again you’ll get someone claiming that all religions are cults. But simplifying it that much loses track of the real harm cults do to a person. I feel a key aspect for what a cult is is Dr. Steve Hassan’s BITE model. BITE stands for Behaviour control, Information control, Thought control, and Emotion control. The key difference between a religion and a cult is one of control. Cults invade every sense of your being, they seek to make it so you don’t have a life outside the cult and what is necessary to maintain it. This is why it’s so difficult for people to leave them. There’s a sense of fear of the unknown. That if you leave there’ll be nothing out there for you. Who knows, maybe they made you do terrible things you can never undo, how will the people who weren’t there forgive you? You can accept the bad parts, because the good parts are there and there’s this giant fear of what will happen if you face the unknown, if you leave. Which brings me to my first major discussion point: Ixhel.
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For the unaware, Ixhel is the protagonist of the Phyrexia: All Will Be One side story A Hollow Body, by Aysha U. Farah. It’s a fantastic read, I would highly recommend anyone who finds this essay at all interesting read it. For a brief summary, Ixhel was created by Atraxa- who was herself formerly a Mirrordin angel before every Praetor save Urabrask compleated her- to be used as a soldier/assassin. She feels devoted to Atraxa, but tries to suppress her other feelings- the feeling of love, of want of affection and approval. Throughout the story, she faces challenges to this suppression: a phyrexian named Belaxis who aids her in her mission, the Thane of Contracts himself, Geth, who challenges her on her devotion even as she kills him, and Atraxa herself in the end. She successfully completes her mission to slay Geth, but his words bother her. About her being a faceless drone, replaceable. So she takes Belaxis and Geth, and uses the Dominus of the Dross Pits to combine them into one being, now named Vishgraz. 
Atraxa is furious at the idea of their creation. But it’s not necessarily their creation itself that she really has an issue with. It’s that the creation was made without being ordered to. Vishgraz represents a threat to her not in their existence but in showing that Ixhel took an action other than what was ordered, even if she did it in hopes of imitating her superior in the cult. Because if she can take one action away from orders, she can take more. And that is a threat to her loyalty, which must be punished to ensure she stays in line, to ensure she stays another faceless drone. And Ixhel does take another action aside from orders, an even more direct disobedience: she spares Vishgraz’s life when ordered to kill them. 
Ixhel represents someone born into a cult. She only ever did what was ordered, because it was all she knew. But cults are not a natural state of mind, they’re a method of control that can be broken free from. And this shows with Ixhel. She obeyed mindlessly, until she was given another option, an idea of what could help her, what could make her fix those feelings she had been taught to ignore and repress. This is a common experience, it’s certainly one I went through. It’s not the only experience with cults though. Because another thing to mention is recruitment, and Phyrexia: All Will Be One provides a great example of this too.
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Another aspect of the storyline for this set was the idea of compleated planeswalkers. This is a new thing for Magic, with the idea introduced in Kamigawa: Neon Dynasty, with Tamiyo. However this was most fully analysed during Phyrexia: All Will Be One’s main story, by Seanan McGuire (who also did a fantastic job with that story, I would highly recommend that one as well). But something I recently came to the realisation of, that I have not seen discussed, is the common factor between every single compleated planeswalker: they’re all the exact types of people who are most vulnerable to recruitment by cults.
If you’re reading this and thinking “most vulnerable” I want you to keep in mind I mean exactly that. Anyone is vulnerable to recruitment by a cult, especially if you think you’re too smart to be recruited. And that’s where our first victim I’ll discuss comes in, Jace Beleren. Jace is a man who prides himself on his intelligence, on his skill with his mind. But in the story, he falls prey to New Phyrexia because he underestimates them, and overestimates his own skills. The love of his life, Vraska, has clearly fallen to compleation. But he thinks he can be smarter; he can use his illusion and mind magic to give her one last day, one last day together with him, where they can pretend like she hasn’t been infected. And that is what makes him be taken in by the cult.
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Jace fell for it because he wanted to be clever and thought he was too smart, but also out of love and devotion to someone else who fell. I believe even if he knew what would happen he would do it again out of devotion. And who knows, the story so far seems to imply he had a plan, that he knew what he was doing. Maybe I’ll be proven wrong and he’ll turn out on top of this situation. But even so, he still lost to New Phyrexia due to this.
Next off is Vraska, another key type to fall for cults. Vraska throughout her entire life has been abused by society, a victim of racism and police brutality. All of those are horrific acts done against her. And cults reach out to those people, they tell them they have the answer, that if they simply follow them they will find the ability to help other downtrodden like themselves, or find a sense of community with others who will not judge them, so long as they follow the rules. Lukka is also very similar to this, but slightly different. Lukka is an outcast, rejected by his entire society, like a very extreme example of ostracisation and bullying. Humans are naturally social creatures, and this can easily be turned against us with a want for acceptance leading us to take abuse we should not tolerate. New Phyrexia also promises him strength, the strength with which he can avoid being hurt again, which he can use to carve a new place in this world and hurt everyone who hurt him, but much much worse. 
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Nahiri also falls under a similar umbrella with Lukka, but slightly less self motivated. Nahiri has a burning desire for revenge, for power against the figure in her life who let her down, Sorin Markov. But also, she believes in her heart of hearts that she is a protector, that everything she’s doing is to protect her homeland and her people, the Kor. And what leads her to being compleated is this sense of protection. She sacrifices her own health and her chance at a cure because she wants to ensure the success of the mission of stopping New Phyrexia. And her self sacrifice to do this may have helped the mission succeed, but it doomed her to fall.
Nissa is very similar to her here actually, as she also fell due to helping someone. She trusted Lukka, and tried to help him to the end, and this led her right into New Phyrexia’s trap. Others who fell this way too include Ajani and Tamiyo. They all trusted someone or sought to protect someone, and that trust was used against them. This shows the type of people who fall for cults because they are selfless. Those who fall because they don’t see a value in their own worth as an individual, but do see it as a collective. This is one of the major flaws of white mana: it’s bad at putting yourself first. It’s so easy to simply fall in line with a cult when you’re used to falling in line and obeying to help the greater good, because with the right words it’s easy to convince anyone that anything is the greater good. It feels safe to take some sacrifice, because after all, we’re taught to admire martyrs. We’re taught to emulate, and share. And those are good instincts don’t get me wrong, one of the most beautiful things about humanity is our capacity for love for our fellow man, the ability for strangers to care for strangers so readily just because they need help. But cults take advantage of that, and New Phyrexia is no different. 
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This is also touched on in the story Cinders, by Cassandra Khaw. This story is unique because it showcases an aspect of New Phyrexia we haven’t touched on here, the Quiet Furnace. While most aspects of New Phyrexia are definitely considered bad, the Quiet Furnace is the one I’ve seen the most arguments for about it being ethical and good. And while it has the most potential for good with this freedom, it also shows more of how cults prey on the most vulnerable. In the story, a Mirran woman, Reyana, is tempted towards compleation by Slobad. Reyana lost everything. She’s fighting a war she never asked to fight, constantly on the run, constantly in fear for her life. And they show her her mother. At peace with the cult, happy, caring. A lot of people join cults simply to follow loved ones. And this is the exact way Reyana joined. A key thing to showcase that this was not genuine freedom, that despite this promise of peace this was a corruption of herself, is the consequences after. Does Slobad and his group allow the Mirrans to freely mingle with the compleat, to simply talk among them knowing they chose differently? No. While he claims this is a free choice, he also artificially holds back interaction between the cultists and their Mirran family, all interaction unless it is for the purpose of recruitment. This shows the real reason for all of this. It’s a show, a show that things can be good, a promise that life will be better if you join and obey, because those you care about made that choice too. If they really believed in this freedom of choice, the Quiet Furnace would not shun contact with Mirrans, simply tolerating their presence without compleating them, it would embrace contact with them, embrace the diversity of perspective those who did not choose the same as the compleat bring to the table. There are good people among the phyrexians, people who believe what they are doing is right and towards peace, towards helping everyone come to a common understanding. Most criticisms of New Phyrexia I’ve seen make the mistake of calling them all monsters, not thinking for a moment that they aren’t monsters, but people, people who made a bad choice for good reasons. But those people don’t realise that they themselves are a victim, a lure in a trap to make others take a choice they never would’ve made otherwise, with the threat of losing contact with their loved ones if they don’t make that leap.
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Another point to consider is what cults offer you, and what New Phyrexia offers you. People join cults because they promise something they lack. Most often that is a sense of community, of welcoming, of becoming, and of love. The price to pay is simply your individuality. When you think about New Phyrexia, that fits perfectly in theme. The oil takes away your worries, it makes you unconcerned with what troubled you prior to your compleation. It doesn’t feel like something wrong, something infecting you, it feels like…. completion. Like something you’ve always been missing has been found. And that’s alluring. That’s genuinely a tempting proposition. Think to yourself, what price would you be willing to pay to not have to think for yourself anymore, to be able to feel safe and just live day to day. That’s the promise of cults. And that’s the promise of New Phyrexia. But it’s not a healthy promise. Following charismatic leaders blindly simply leads to suffering, whether it’s for you or those outside the cult, or others inside of it. This is even shown in the text, in the story for March of the Machine by K. Arsenault Rivera. 
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When Elspeth faces off against Elesh Norn, she has been changed. She gave up her life in a moment of turmoil, sacrificed her being to save the multiverse. And she was ascended because of it, having her sense of self altered and her physical form transmuted, when her only choice otherwise was death. Sound familiar? So when Elspeth threatens Norn's rule of power, what does Norn promise her? Friends among the phyrexians, lovers among them. She points out their similarities, how Elspeth is transformed as well, simply in a way deemed prettier by society, how her form is irrevocably altered, how she has a creed she is following just as much as Norn. And Elspeth does think of this offer, she does look around and think of how happy everyone looks, how content they seem to be to be cogs in a great machine forged with glorious purpose. But Elesh Norn doesn’t even think to talk about the consent of those people in the cult for whether they’d even want to be Elspeth’s friend or lover. Many cult members do end up coerced into relationships they do not want, and this is a showing that Norn is no different from any base cult leader. She knows that people deserve freedom of choice, and freedom of thought. The moment Elspeth realises Norn is wrong, the moment she realises she is nothing like Norn, despite the similarities between her religion and Norn’s cult, is seeing how Norn treats Jin-Gitaxias. Jin raises a simple objection, a logical one, that Norn is spending time discussing and talking while their soldiers, their people, are dying. And Norn tells him to be silent. Chief among all things, cults silence dissent against the leader. One could say that’s the cardinal sin in a cult. And that is what makes Elspeth realise she could never be like Norn. And hopefully, eventually, it is what will help Elspeth keep in touch with her humanity after her transformation. Because no matter what, the key lesson is, even the strongest of us is still vulnerable to temptation, to the urge to lose ourselves in obedience of another. And it's more important now than ever to remember to fight that urge.
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Anticipated Questions (FAQ I Suppose But Ahead Of Time)
But I don’t see New Phyrexia this way, I think it’s (Insert X Narrative): That’s your view. You’re entirely entitled to it. This wouldn’t be very much of a good essay talking about cults and the importance of the freedom of choice if I insisted everyone else follow my point of view and agree entirely with everything I’ve said.
Are you saying I’m wrong for liking New Phyrexia?: Not at all. Again with the point before, this is my interpretation I am posting for literary merit in hopes it may interest others and perhaps aid their understanding of New Phyrexia. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with liking villains. It’s simply an understanding I came to through a lot of thinking about New Phyrexia I felt others may enjoy. The last thing I want is to start some sort of flame war over this. In fact if you use this essay to start such a flame war and try and make others conform to your beliefs, you have missed the point entirely.
Tell me about your personal experience with cults: Respectfully no. I will talk about that to people I am comfortable talking about it with. People who friend me on Discord may ask me, I may answer but I will not mind them asking. Otherwise I prefer not to share.
If you don’t want people to change their views, why did you post this essay?: I was thinking about my personal experience with cults and I thought others may want to see them and it may interest others, and it helped me type out my own personal feelings.
Isn’t it meritorious to discuss how New Phyrexia also has Christofascist elements with the Machine Orthodoxy and the specifics of the religion and how Norn demands they conquer?: For this specific essay, I actually believe no. A key thing a lot of people don’t think about is not all cults are the same belief systems. They don’t all approach with end of the world rhetoric, or some crazy theory, or hatred of others. Sometimes they’re a group preaching love and acceptance and tolerance, and claiming that you will feel much better with the cult. Sometimes they’re groups trying to take in the underserved of society and use their righteous indignation to serve their own ends. It doesn’t matter that New Phyrexia is Christofascist for why it is a cult, for all we care it could be about refusing violence entirely and spreading tolerance and goodwill to non phyrexians and preaching for coexistence. The key common factor is a manipulation of the members and control of their lives.
Despite all this I’m going to send you an ask or DM saying you’re horrible for this post in some moralistic way: Ok.
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callsign-rogueone · 8 months
Text
what was I made for? - g.t.
Garrick Tavis x Marked!Pacifist!Reader (continuation of keep her safe) The aftermath of War Games has you questioning your purpose, and what your signet truly is. wc: 4.4k 🏷: FOURTH WING AND IRON FLAME SPOILERS (I have 50 pages left, but I just can’t do it. send help.) canon-level violence, injury, canon character death, self doubt, anxiety. oops, I made Dain tolerable again. angst, then happy, then more angst. I also skipped over a smut scene / just made a reference to it happening, so if anyone wants that as a separate post, lmk and I can make it happen 👀 thank you to everyone who liked/reblogged/commented on part 1! it means a lot to me 🫶
Riorson House is more your home than Basgiath ever has been, but it’s become foreign to you in the three years you’d spent at the college. It feels like you’re hallucinating as you wander the halls.
Maybe everything that’s happened in the last few days has been a hallucination -- it wouldn't be the first time Varrish or Carr had pushed you to delirium with the amount of pain you’d taken for others.
Maybe it’s a dream. That’s it. A really bad dream. Any moment now, you’re going to wake up in Garrick’s bed and get ready for morning formation, and you’ll forget the sight of Liam dying by breakfast, when you’re sitting across from him at the table like you always do. Violet’s screams of pain will stop playing in your ears, replaced by her laughter at one of Ridoc’s jokes.
But no matter how much you pinch at your skin, you aren’t waking up. This is reality.
“I hear you’re a mender, too,” someone says in a gentle voice, bringing you out of your daze. Violet’s brother, Brennan.
“Does it ever get easier?” You ask quietly. “Does it always hurt this much?”
“Mending becomes easier. Seeing that kind of stuff every day doesn’t,” he replies, and the exhausted look on his face tells you he’s being honest. “But it shouldn’t hurt. Tell me more about that.”
“The second person I mended was a scribe who’d fallen from a ladder in the library and broken her leg. I did everything right, the bone set properly, but my leg hurt for a week, right where she’d broken hers.”
Brennan is silent, letting you continue.
“They broke Garrick’s arm in RSC. I was able to fix it for him, and I took the pain, but they broke it again two hours later. I mended him and Xaden over and over until I collapsed. I didn’t wake for two days. They both still think it was just exhausting for me. They don’t know about the pain.”
The tears are coming openly now, dripping down your cheeks, and you bring a hand up to wipe them away with the sleeve of your flight jacket. “But it isn’t all bad. I couldn’t save Liam, but I was able to make him more comfortable in the end. I took his pain away, and let him go in peace.”
You don’t tell him what death feels like. No description you could give could adequately prepare anyone for the cold sensation that still lingers in your chest. It will likely remain there for the next few days.
“Hey,” he says softly, “We’ll figure this out, I promise. For now, just try to get some rest.” 
You nod quietly, looking back up at him. “Can someone please tell Garrick that I’m okay?” You ask in a small voice, folding your hands in your lap. You’d been heartbroken to realize that the rest of the squad had left for Basgiath before you woke, leaving you here alone.
You didn’t get to say goodbye to any of them, and you don’t know when you’ll see them again. Or if you’ll see them, you think, but you push the thought away quickly. They’ll survive. They have to.
Brennan cracks a smile - everyone in the rebel cause is aware of how deeply Garrick loves you. “Of course.”
———————————————————————
“Cadet Mairi died alongside his dragon, who was attacked by a drift of Gryphon riders. Cadet Avan attempted to mend them, and died trying,” Xaden says levelly, staring down the group of professors on the dais. “They both died honorable, but preventable deaths.”
Garrick knows Xaden is lying, knows you aren’t dead — or you hadn’t been when they left for Basgiath, at least, but his friend’s words have him on edge. Have you woken up yet? 
Chradh speaks into his mind, sending a wave of hot rage through him. “Relax.”
“Relax?” He echoes, irate. “You’re telling me to relax right now, when-”
Chradh doesn’t bother to argue with him. “She is safe under the care of the silver one’s brother, where she will remain until the moment is right. It is better this way. She won’t be in pain anymore.”
Chradh doesn’t elaborate further. Fucking dragons and their constant need to speak in riddles.
The rest of the quadrant spends the night drinking and congratulating themselves on surviving, but Garrick doesn’t touch a drop of alcohol. The three of you were supposed to do this together. It wouldn’t be right to celebrate without you.
———————————————————————
“We’re gonna start from square one, with something that can’t hurt you,” Brennan says, placing two halves of a cracked plate on the table in front of you.
It’s simple enough to make the pieces rise into the air, using the same magic required to make a pen write for you. You concentrate, willing the halves to fuse together. They touch, and you think you’ve done it, your heart leaping, only to fall as they crash back down to the table again, splitting into even more pieces.
Brennan touches one of the shards, and they glue themselves back together perfectly; no cracks, no trace of the plate ever having been broken. “That’s what I thought.”
“Let me keep trying,” you begin, heart pounding. Brennan can’t think you’re a failure, not this early.
“You could sit here with this plate all day and it wouldn’t change,” he says gently, confirming what you know deep down. “I don’t think you’re a mender. I think you’re something else entirely.”
You sit with the information for a moment.
“Signets take the form of our base need as a person,” he says. “We need to find out what that is for you.”
You already know. “I wake up every day grateful that Xaden bargained for our lives, but I have done too much harm in my time at Basgiath. The crown has done too much harm to Tyrrendor. All I’ve ever wished for is to fix that, to undo the pain.”
“To undo the pain, or to help move forward and grow?” He asks gently.
You aren’t sure.
———————————————————————
You go through your morning stretches, as always, focusing on your breath to distract from the pain in your side. 
“Your mate has returned.” Tab says, interrupting. “Thought you’d like to know.”
You bolt upright, running through the house toward the gates, bypassing Xaden to sprint straight toward Garrick.
He wraps you in a warm embrace, resting his chin on the top of your head. You still fit together like puzzle pieces, even after months apart.
“You’re alive,” you breathe. “Nobody would tell me anything, I was worried sick,”
“Of course I’m alive, angel. Had to come back to you.”
You trace the Lieutenant’s patch across his collarbone, memorizing the shape. It looks natural on him, like it’s always been there. It sounds good, too. Lieutenant Garrick Tavis.
“I need to tell you something,” you say quietly, “I haven’t been entirely honest with you about-“
Footsteps approach. “Sorry to break up the reunion,” Felix says, “but Avan, we need you.”
There’s something in his tone that has your heart pounding. Which of your friends is it going to be this time?
“Tell me later,” Garrick says. “Go. Do what you were made to do.”
You know he means well, but his words tie your stomach in a knot. What you were made to do. Were you truly made to endure the suffering of others?
———————————————————————
Every muscle in your body feels like it’s on fire as you slump into a chair, sitting down for the first time that day. If you’re lucky, you’ll be able to get some sleep before you’re needed again.
“There you are. I didn’t see you in battle brief.” Garrick says, relieved.
“Haven’t been going,” you mumble. “They need me here. Bren’s teaching now, so s’ just me and one other mender.”
He realizes no healers had come with the riot from Basgiath. You likely haven’t left the infirmary since they’d arrived.
“Come to bed,” he coaxes softly. “You need sleep. You can't pour from an empty cup.”
Yes, you can. You have been for months.
He takes your hand, not giving you a choice. You lean into him as he leads you up the grand staircase to a room near Xaden’s. Your muscles protest every step, but you keep quiet.
You haven’t been in here for years, not since you’d left for Basgiath as candidates, but it’s exactly the same as you remember; dark drapery, bookshelves, a neat display of the knives that he hadn’t taken to school with him.
The sight has you in tears.
“Whoa, hey,” he says softly, pulling you closer, and you whimper in pain at the pressure against your ribs. He lets go immediately. “Angel, I’m sorry — are you hurt?”
You sob, the dam finally breaking and grief flooding out of you. You haven’t seen each other since that horrible day, you haven’t seen anyone from the squad you went with to Resson, haven’t had anyone to talk about it with, until now. 
You shake your head, tears dripping down your cheeks. “I couldn’t save Liam. I tried, I really did. All I could do was take his pain away.”
So Xaden had told Basgiath the truth, to some degree: you tried to fix Liam, and couldn’t. The boy’s death had hurt you badly enough that Xaden wouldn’t let you return to the school.
“There was nothing else you could do. Nobody could save him, not after Deigh…”
“I know that, but it wasn’t just him. Everyone I’ve ever… fixed, I’ve taken the pain from their body into mine, and I can’t get rid of it for days.”
Garrick’s heart breaks. So that’s what Chradh meant when he said you wouldn’t be in pain anymore if you left Basgiath. Those eight-hour days of mending infantry may as well have been torture for you. 
Torture. RSC. You’d healed his wounds, Xaden’s, Bodhi’s, Violet’s, time and time again without complaint, and he knew it took a lot out of you, but not that it hurt. “Angel, why didn’t you tell me? If I’d known…”
“I wanted to,” you sniffle, “I wanted to tell you a year ago when it started happening. I thought it was normal, that I was just weak, until Brennan told me that this doesn’t happen to him. He just gets tired, like everyone else does when they use their signets too much.”
You try to steady your breathing, but the pain in your not-broken ribs is too overwhelming. “I’ve spent hours practicing and I can’t even fix a broken plate. I’m not a mender. I don’t know what I am. Nobody does, not even the professors. Brennan thinks it’s getting better, but I don’t have it in me to tell him that it isn’t.”
“I’m so sorry,” he whispers. He wants to pull you into an embrace, wants to stroke your hair and tell you it’ll be okay, but he doesn’t want to hurt you any more than he already has.
“S’ not your fault.” You sniff.
“But it’s not yours, either,” he reminds you gently. “You’re so strong, angel. You crossed the parapet, ran the gauntlet, you bonded a dragon, and you’ve endured everything else. Please don’t ever think for a second that you’re weak.”
He takes your hand in his, watching your face carefully, but you don’t wince at the touch. “We’ll talk to Brennan tomorrow, together. For now, I just want you to get some sleep, okay?”
You nod silently, having run out of tears.
“Attagirl.”
As you settle into bed next to him, freshly showered and wearing one of his warm sweaters, you swear the pain has dimmed.
———————————————————————
When Garrick takes you to see Brennan the next morning, he isn’t alone. Your professors are seated beside him, along with some of the Tyrrish elders.
Devera speaks first. “We owe you an apology, Cadet Avan. The faculty was unaware that Carr and Varrish were using your signet as a method of punishment, or that it pains you to use it.”
“And I owe you an apology,” you say quietly. “I should have come back after the War Games.”
“That was my decision,” Xaden says firmly, “and I stand by it. She was in no condition to return to the school, much less to graduate and be stationed at an outpost across the continent from her support system, while still feeling the coldness of Cadet Mairi’s death.”
How does he know that you could feel it? Had you told him in your delirium? Had Brennan told him? Had you even told Brennan? 
“Your friends have effectively plead your case, and we agree that you have satisfied all the requirements for graduation from the Rider’s Quadrant.” Emeterrio says. “Congratulations, Lieutenant.”
Garrick slips your flight jacket onto your shoulders, and you notice the Lieutenant insignia has already been sewn on, to match his. When did he…? 
You accept the handshake Devera offers you, still a little dazed, but there’s one more order of business to address.
“May I rejoin my old squad?” You ask the table of professors quietly. “They are family to me. I would like to ride with them again, and aid them however I can.”
They exchange hesitant looks, and your heart sinks. Do they not think you’re good enough?
“I don’t see why not,” Brennan says firmly enough for everyone else to agree — he outranks the professors with the years he’s been part of the movement.
You exhale in relief.
Garrick cheers. “The dream team is back, baby!” He pulls you into a gentle embrace, knowing you’re still in pain, but wanting to hold you close.
You laugh, not minding the ache in your ribs.
Xaden is unimpressed. “When have we ever once called ourselves the dream team?”
“We haven’t, but I’m starting now. It’ll stick. I’ll have it embroidered on your flight jacket, Xay.”
“Don’t you fucking dare,” Xaden replies, setting off a brotherly argument behind you.
You look to the leadership once more, bowing your head in respect. “Thank you. For everything.”
Devera gives you a warm smile. “I am glad to see you have found your place here, Lieutenant. Remember that your empathy is a gift, even in times of war.”
Empathy.
“Am I dismissed?” You ask.
“Yes, Lieutenants, you are all dismissed,” Emeterrio answers dryly, looking over your shoulder at Garrick and Xaden. The latter has the former in a playful headlock, messing up his hair. 
“Human boys,” Tab says, exasperated. You laugh in agreement, leaving them in the Assembly room to sort themselves out.
It’s easy enough to find who you’re looking for — he’s the only person sitting completely alone in the mess, a textbook open in front of him that he isn’t reading. He’s gazing into the distance, eyes unfocused, but he looks up when he realizes you’re standing in front of him.
“I’m sorry,” he says quietly, “about what I saw in Varrish’s office. I had no idea how much you all have endured. What we are taught in Navarre is only one side of the story, but you showed me the other.”
“I’m glad I could help change your mind.”
He reaches into the pocket of his flight jacket and extends a hand. Your protection rune sits in his palm, complete with a new leather cord. “A peace offering. I stole it back from Varrish, and Brennan mended it.”
You smile, taking it from him and slipping it back over your head. “You’re turning into quite the rule-breaker, Aetos. But thank you. It means a lot to me.”
You’re about to leave, but something compels you to impart a piece of advice. “I know how it feels when people don’t want to trust you because of your family history. It’ll take a while for some of them to warm up to you, but you can make it go a lot faster if you keep yourself out of trouble.”
———————————————————————
Your first flight back with your squad is supposed to be easy, a surveying flight with a small riot, just to check their perimeters, but you can’t seem to quell your anxiety as you take off.
“We will be fine, gentle one. We’re in strong company,” Tab reassures. He stays close to Chradh, knowing Garrick’s proximity will calm you. “How does it feel to be back?”
“Good. I’ve missed this.”
“You have always enjoyed being up this high,” he agrees. “Shall we review some of our basic maneuvers?”
“Sure.”  Maybe that will settle your nerves.
“Hold on.” Tab dips, practicing all the angles — banking right, left, up, down.
“Something is wrong,” you blurt, and Tab straightens his path immediately, falling back into the formation. Every nerve in your body pulses with a sensation you’ve never felt before, standing on end. “Something really bad is going to happen.”
You’re right.
“Wyvern,” Tab warns just as they come into your line of sight. They charge straight at the front of the riot, where Sgaeyl leads the pack. 
You’re outmatched, nearly two dozen of them and only ten of you. You’re going to die here. At least you’ll be with your best friends.
“That kind of thinking isn’t helpful!” Tab scolds, tightening the formation. 
One gets too close for comfort, spewing blue flame, and Chradh banks hard - too hard. You gasp in horror as Garrick is thrown from his seat down to the ground below.
“Dive!” You yell, and Tab follows without hesitation, making a near-vertical drop.
You’ve never been so grateful for the running landing they’d taught you last year. It had been excruciating to execute on top of the pain of unbroken bones, but it’s just manageable now after a few days off from the infirmary.
Clutching Failsafe for dear life, your only defense, you sprint toward Garrick’s limp body, ripping off your goggles.
His heart still beats, but multiple bones look broken, his breathing labored. Touching him is almost unbearable, which tells you he won’t last much longer if you don’t do something.
Deep breaths, like Brennan had taught you, to accept their pain as it entered your body, holding it before batting it away like a fly.
You still haven’t figured out how to make that work.
Hot tears roll down your cheeks, and you start to berate yourself; Why can’t you do this? Compose yourself. Garrick is going to die if you can’t pull it together. Garrick is going to die, just like Liam did, because you aren’t strong enough to fix a fucking plate.
Anger overcomes you for the first time since you’d watched your parents die six years ago. You scream, a sound like nothing you’ve ever heard before splitting the air. The pain dissipates almost instantly. For the first time in two years, your body isn’t aching, and you sob in relief.
Garrick bolts upright, gasping for breath as spring blooms across the snowy plain, trees with bare branches suddenly teeming with green leaves.
Tab roars in pride and the rest of the riot joins in, the cliffs shaking from the volume of their celebration. 
“Lifebringer!” He thunders into your mind. 
Your head snaps upward, and you realize that the ground is littered with motionless wyvern.
Garrick pulls you to your feet, brushing the tears from your cheeks. “Come on, angel,” he says, grinning, “we have a war to win.”
You’re still dazed as Tab brings you back to Riorson house, Garrick helping you dismount and leading you inside.
“We have a weapon,” Xaden says, actually smiling as he faces the assembly. “Something, someone, that can destroy wyvern in their tracks.”
Garrick keeps you glued to his side as Xaden tells the elders what happened, but it’s all in one ear, out the other.
You’re dismissed after a few minutes, heading back out to the mess, where your friends gather around one of the large tables in the library.
“Tab called me lifebringer,” you say, confused. “What is that?”
“I thought it was just folklore,” Violet says from a few rows down, scanning the shelves, and everyone turns to her, listening. “Lifebringers are said to influence healing and growth. In some cultures, they’ve been credited with ending famines by rejuvenating harvests, and saving the innocent from the grasp of Malek and his Death.”
“Wicked,” Ridoc appraises quietly.
“Aha.” Violet produces a thin volume, cracking it open to the right page. The illustration there looks uncannily like you.
“Only the purest of heart can be lifebringers, those who hold no malice toward their fellow man. The weapons they carry are sharp, but unused,” she reads aloud. “Garrick gave you Failsafe as just that — a failsafe. You never drew blood with it. You never hurt anyone except in challenges, when it was kill or be killed, and even then you held back.”
Bodhi speaks next. “With most signets, the stronger the wielder’s emotion, the more powerful the ability becomes. You feel empathy for the wounded, so you can fix them and ease their pain, but when you thought Garrick was going to die, that was another level of distress, and I guess it was enough to overcome the dark magic.” 
Garrick squeezes your shoulder in reassurance that he’s still very much alive beside you.
Violet closes the book, setting it down.
“I’m not in pain anymore,” you whisper, still dazed. You’ve almost forgotten what that feels like, having spent the last three years holding both your own and that of all your friends.
“You needed an outlet,” Xaden says. “Pain makes it harder to channel, and you were in pain 24/7, which is why the professors thought your signet was underdeveloped. Getting angry, and getting that energy out of your body allowed you to use the full extent of your power.”
“If I had known this earlier, do you think I could have…” you don’t finish the sentence. Everyone in this room knows how hard you’d tried to save Liam.
“Maybe,” Violet says quietly, “but that is not a path you want to go down. Trust me.”
———————————————————————
“Do you want to explain why the hallway was full of sunflowers when I went to bed last night?” Xaden asks slyly, dropping into a seat in front of you with a plate of eggs and bacon.
You burn with embarrassment.
Bodhi grins. “You see, cousin, when a man and a woman love each other very much, - ow, fuck!” He exclaims, rubbing the back of his head where Garrick had whacked him.
“At least they didn’t set the vale on fire,” another of your squadmates says, looking at Xaden and Violet pointedly. “You still owe me for putting that out, by the way.”
Your eyes widen as you connect the dots. “So all that dry lightning last year was you two…”
“Okay, changing the subject!” Brennan says loudly, not liking the way this conversation is headed. “We need to figure out how to use your signet without endangering Tavis’s life again.”
“Well, it sounds like they already found another way,” Ridoc says, grinning, but he squeaks out an apology as Garrick begins to rise from his chair.
You tug your boyfriend back into his seat by the sleeve, looking past him at Brennan. “I think I need to work a few days in the infirmary between flights,” you propose. “If I build up enough pain, I could probably-“
“NO,” the whole squad says at once, Tab included.
“Your healing is only to be used when absolutely necessary,” Xaden orders, and even though you’re on equal footing now, both newly-minted Lieutenants, you agree quietly without protest.
“See, that’s your problem,” Sloane says, and all eyes turn to her. “You defer to literally everyone. You’re an officer now. Act like it.”
“Pardon?” You ask, looking at her in disbelief.
“That’s exactly what she’s talking about,” Imogen cuts in. “Pardon? You can’t even discipline a first-year cadet. Do you really think any veteran rider will ever listen to what you have to say?”
“Enough,” you say firmly, your nails digging into the wood.
None of your friends intervene, not even Brennan. This has to be another nightmare. There’s no way they'd hang you out to dry like this. Right?
Sloane isn’t finished. “It’s a miracle you made it out of Basgiath alive. You’re too soft. If you won’t kill anyone, what are you going to do when it’s between your life or someone else’s? Their life or his?”
The mention of Garrick is your last straw. “That is enough from both of you, Cadets,” you reprimand. Thorny vines burst from the seams of the table, whipping out toward them, and they stagger back to avoid being cut.
You startle, your heart pounding against your ribs as you realize what you’ve done.
Sloane is the first to apologize. “I’m sorry. We didn’t mean any of it. I just thought that provoking you might…” she doesn’t finish the sentence, looking down at the still-twitching vines covering the tabletop.
“We definitely took it too far,” Imogen adds, sounding genuinely remorseful. “That was a really fucked up thing for me to say. I’m sorry.”
Bodhi waves a hand, and the vines slither back into the table, as if they were never there. 
Your eyes widen at the blood on his cheeks — he’d been caught in the crossfire. You touch his face with a shaky hand, only brushing your fingertips across the skin, and the scratches disappear instantly, leaving no trace of the harm you’d done.
Somehow that makes you feel worse.
“Well,” Garrick says in his section-leader voice, “that was certainly informative, but none of you are to ever disrespect her like that again. Is that clear?”
“Yes,” both girls answer quietly, heads lowered in shame.
Your breathing has steadied enough to speak. “I understand why you did that, but I’m not going to tell you that it was okay, because it wasn’t.”
With that, you take your plate and leave. Nobody follows you.
———————————————————————
The balcony door slides open, soft footsteps approaching.
“I want to be alone, Gare,” you say quietly. 
“Not Garrick,” Xaden replies, settling down next to you on the stone floor, “and you may want to be alone right now, but you probably shouldn’t be.”
“I didn't mean to hurt anyone, Xay. You know that,” you whisper. You don’t move your gaze from the potted plant in front of you, as if you’re worried it will lash out at you — or him — if you turn away.
“I know, angel. I know.” He exhales deeply, a gentle cloud forming with the warmth of his breath. 
There’s a moment of quiet before he speaks again, just the sound of the cold wind over the valley and the distant footsteps of cadets running on the trail below. “Working through this is not going to be easy, but if anyone can do it, it’s you.”
You’ve come to hate that notion, everyone’s insistence that the pain you’ve been through has primed you for more pain, different pain. Why can’t it ever end?
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borderlinereminders · 1 month
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what if I know my friend has the energy to talk to someone else and is still not responding to me then it’s not that they don’t have the energy to talk
Maybe it sounds harsh but maybe they don’t have the energy to talk to you. And I realize that sounds like a lot. Like you’re not important. And that’s not what I’m saying.
It’s possible they were priorly engaged in the convo and don’t have the energy to carry more conversations.
It’s possible it’s an easier topic to talk about than what you messaged about.
And honestly? It is absolutely possible it’s just that they have the energy for that person and not you.
I have different energy for different people. I can be quiet and not replying to anyone, but when my best friend messages, I have the energy for her. There are a lot of reasons for that, and none of them mean my other friends aren’t important. But the reality is that she is my best friend. I’ve known her over a decade. And she doesn’t take energy from me because I never have to mask or filter to her. If I accidentally say the wrong thing, I know it won’t ruin our friendship so there’s less pressure to talk to her. I don’t have to think about everything I’m about to say, I can just say it. I’m not saying that’s the reason, but it is a reason for me why my best friend gets responses from me when no one else does.
Part of it is that I can be short (not in a rude way, but it happens when it’s harder for me to think of responses) with her and she knows it’s not her. I don’t have to constantly worry she’s going to think my mood is about her.
She’s also okay with me ignoring any messages about heavier topics and just sending TikTok videos or memes as a means of communication.
Like sometimes I don’t even answer my husband because he’s asking questions I don’t have the energy to answer. There are so many reasons this could be the case.
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kyra45 · 7 months
Text
A reminder that scammers are using the situation in Palestine to make a quick buck by stealing images off news sources passing it off as their own or even taking images from real people there and using it as theirs. They are finding public fundraisers on Facebook or elsewhere and saving it to use for themselves. Scammers do not care about what’s happening there; They only want to make money without caring who’s getting affected by it and making it more difficult for Palestine people to get the support they’re needing.
These scammers pretend they’re from Palestine or say their family is in Palestine and usually use a story that sounds real enough but may seem slightly flawed. They may be going around sending DMs asking for donations in private instead and their posts often have a Linktree link to obscure their PayPal. This is a recent development due to their scams getting called out so often they’ve tried to hide it but keep doing the same thing several times over. However, this isn’t to say everyone who uses that is scamming and most of the time these scammers don’t have any other link on it meaning it’s only purpose is to try and hide the PayPal link out of sight but it also means you can track where it appears! Usually a scam account will reuse links across their blogs and give away their scam.
Additionally, these scammers claiming to be in Palestine/have a family in Palestine often will insist they do what they’re doing for safety reasons if you start asking them questions about their methods. They’ll start getting details wrong, make excuses, and then tell you that you just don’t understand anything at all and that you’re attacking them because you just asked a few simple questions. There has been a case of a scammer who used photos of an American family in a hospital claiming they were in Palestine.
Unfortunately, these scams will only get more numerous in time and the scammers will try to profit off of it since there’s plenty of footage they can claim as their own and plenty of images/stories to steal and pass on as theirs. They will not tell you anything with honesty and will continue to lie for as long as they’d like. They don’t stop when called out and usually just change usernames at a rapid pace and block anyone who comments on their posts saying they’re a scammer.
As a result, here is some suggestions:
1. Donate only to verified sources that are confirmed to be going towards Palestine
2. Donate only to accounts who is verified to be someone who is a Palestine resident usually via other users who know them well
3. Always be wary of DMs from complete strangers asking for money on the spot if it’s a brand new account though older ones pop up trying scams too
4. Ask questions to those who send you DMs that only someone in Palestine would know the answer to. See what they know and how well they reply or see if they stop talking to you the instant you ask them anything. Alternatively, ask for their paypal-me link and see if they’re willing to give it to you. Type it into search and see where it goes. Pay attention to the country, the persons name, and the images they have. Record it for archiving purposes
5. Just be wary of asks sent that claim to be someone in Palestine/have a family in Palestine. As far as I know and can tell, these asks are rarely from legitimate users needing support but that’s not to say they’re all scams some may be real people
Overall, just please be careful out there and pay attention to where your money will go. Make sure it’s a verified support method and ensure the funds are going to who needs it. There are links out there that go to legitimate places, and users are free to share this and add them if they’d like.
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dean-a-mean-tae · 9 months
Text
Why Won’t Bang Chan Let Nicholas Drink? | Stray Kids Extra Member AU
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Chan tells STAY why Nicholas isn't allowed to drink.
WARNINGS: Nicholas is an emotional whiny drunk.
@cafekitsune made the dividers | Nicholas Ross Master List
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Another Chan's Room episode and another chaotic conversation with STAY. Chan had been talking about his room when a comment caught his eye.
"Who in Stray Kids doesn't drink?" Chan read as he laughed. "I don't."
"Nicholas isn't allowed to drink," Chan continued as he watched the comments.
He thought of the first and last time Nicholas got drunk. It was a completely new experience with the younger boy, and Chan wasn't trying to have a repeat.
"Nicholas has only gotten drunk once, and I plan on keeping it that way," He laughed as he crossed his arms.
"Why isn't he allowed to drink?" Chan hummed in thought as he looked up.
"He gets super emotional," He answered as he tilted his head. "Like, everything makes him laugh or cry. There is no in-between."
He remembers the experience like it was yesterday.
"I still don't know how he got drunk. He was there one second, and he was gone the next."
"Does anyone know where Nick went?" Jeongin asked as he looked around the living room.
Everyone was at the 3racha + Hyunjin's dorm for a sleepover. They had pillows and blankets covering the floor with snacks and a hot meal Minho had cooked.
On the couch lay Felix, Seungmin, and Hyunjin. In front of them were Jisung and Minho, with Chan and Changbin to their right. That left Jeongin and Nicholas to lie on the left of Minho.
"He came out of nowhere, and Felix showed him something, and he just started crying."
Nicholas walked into the living room. Well, he waddled more than he walked. Moments showed where Minho came up with the nickname Penguin.
Without a word, Nicholas waddled over to Jeongin and kneeled over him before flopping down. Letting out an 'oof' when Nick collided with him, Jeongin wrapped his arms around the older.
"Look, Bug," Felix cooed, waving his hand at the tallest male. He smiled when Nicholas looked up at him with bleary eyes. "It's a kitty."
It was a kitten. A gorgeous tuxedo kitten wrapped up in a blanket like a baby. It's arms and legs were tucked away, so only its head stuck out of the burrito blanket.
While Jeongin smiled at the cat, Nicholas' eyes teared up. Felix frowned as he sat up, almost falling off the couch, trying to comfort the older male.
"It doesn't have any arms," Nicholas sniffled, snatching the phone from Felix and showing Minho the video. The shorter boy snorted before pausing.
He leaned forward and smelt Nicholas' breath before recoiling. Minho shouted as he pointed at the crying boy, "He's been drinking!"
"Why doesn't it have any arms?" Nicholas huffed, showing the phone to Hyunjin, who was cooing at him.
"I still don't know where he would have found it."
"How did he get liquor?! We don't have any here!" Chan shouted, running to get water for the now-crying Nicholas. He was wrapped in a pile of blankets, sandwiched between Hyunjin and Jisung. A giggling Jeongin was still under him.
Minho was fixing Nicholas a small plate of food so he wouldn't upset his stomach. While Changbin, Felix, and Seungmin watched the chaos that was Chan in the kitchen.
"Why doesn't it have any arms?" Nick cried.
“He also complains about the taste of it.”
"Hyunnie," Nick whined, and Hyunjin threw his head back to hide his smile before looking at the younger.
"What, darling?" He whispered, softly stroking Nick's cheek.
"I drank something disgusting," Nick sniffled. Everyone laughed as he whined at them.
"Yeah, he hates drinking, but he will if you just hand him something," Chan said, blinking fast to escape the memory. He smiled at STAY before moving on to the next question.
"Do we use Nick's height to our advantage? Of course!"
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Nicholas Ross Master List
©️DEANAMEANTAE2023
Tags list: @bada-lee-ily, @jinnie-ret, @hwxnghyynjin, You can be added by asking in the replies, sending me a message, or doing an ask thingy.
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exactlymaximumgarden · 3 months
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224 w/ted! 🩵 (and congrats, my friend. you deserve it!)
THANK YOU SWEET RORY <33 MWAH
224. beneath the mask - lyn (link to req info here)
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all your life, you've never really been that open of a person. it's not like you've ever had anything to keep secret. it's more just your personal philosophy: not to let people too close unless you truly trust them. and you've maintained that philosophy all throughout your career as a budding streamer and content creator. you never let anyone too far in, keeping the privacy barrier as a comfortable buffer around yourself.
you've created a mask for yourself. it's your place to hide, and you do not intend on taking it off any time soon. at least, that's what you intended.
but for some reason, you can't stop yourself from pouring your heart out upon meeting ted.
it happens at a party. you knew people who knew people who knew ludwig, the party's host, so you managed to snag an invite yourself. however, the longer you idle in the corner of the room, you realize just how awkward things are. awkward considering you recognize all these people's faces, sure, but you don't really know them. not like that.
you sigh to yourself. would it kill you to just leave? plus, these are big name streamers. a lot of them probably wouldn't want to bother connecting with an unknown content creator such as yourself. and you get it, to a point. you can't tell them how to see you. there's that undeniable dichotomy between the two groups. it's just the way things go.
"ailaiyoralfit!"
you're snapped out of your daze as you look up, seeing an insanely tall and also insanely handsome brunette man gazing down at you. he's got a sideways grin on his face as he leans toward you. he clearly said something, but his attempts at yelling it over the music and loud chatter just caused whatever speech he just uttered to sound like garbled gibberish.
you lean in towards him. "what?" you call, craning your neck to hear him as he repeats himself.
at this, he bends a bit closer to your ear. "i said, i like your outfit!"
"oh!" you pull back, sending him a faint smile. "thank you. i like yours."
"thanks!" he sidles a bit closer to you, likely so he doesn't have to keep raising his voice to talk to you from a distance. he sticks out a hand, and you can't help but notice his fingers and how they're decked out in a plethora of silver rings. "i'm ted."
"(y/n)." you take his hand, his broad palm instantly swamping yours.
"(y/n)," ted repeats, almost as if he's testing how your name feels in his mouth, how it rolls off the tongue. "awesome."
and that's how it all starts. the two of you begin casually chatting, and before you know it, he's asking you all sorts of questions. where you grew up, your interests, all that stuff. and where you'd typically be guarded about your answers, where you'd be conscious of meticulously choosing every word in your response, all that inhibition is gone. you're spilling everything, and it feels good. and ted listens, his chocolate eyes lighting up with each reply you give him. maybe it's just the lights reflecting off his silver-rimmed glasses, but there's a certain twinkle in his gaze every time he looks your way.
for the first time, it feels like you've found the person that you can really open your heart to. where has he been? you've been searching all along for a person to discard your mask. you never imagined you would find them under such circumstances, and you especially never imagined it to be so easy for them to get under your skin, but here you are.
not only that, but leaving the party with ted's number, a plan to meet up for lunch and thrifting together in a few days' time, and a frenzied swarm of butterflies in your stomach at the thought of seeing him again were also not on your bucket list for tonight. or really ever. but something about ted was subverting any previous expectations for yourself, and you surely aren't opposed to it.
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old-school-butch · 5 months
Note
Hello again <3
I sent you an anon that you replied to on April 1st, which was me asking how ex-TIFs are received back into womanhood. Your reply gave me a little foothold which ended up very comforting as I started coming out rapid-fire to all my friends as detrans. this is primarily a message for other people in my situation, who are afraid and might want a template of what you might expect will happen once you do come out with it.
Predictably, most of my friends dropped me; I've 3 friends left. Two of which continue to support trans people but can accept that i have different opinions (as long as i'm "not mean") and one of which has seen the gender critical arguments, accepted them, and agrees. So, heavy losses, but not total losses. My two siblings seemed to sigh in relief and reveal that they never believed in genderism at all, which is odd, because in my 10 years of being trans not one of them challenged me on it. my mom fell into heavy guilt over "letting me" do all this, although i was 18 when i took testo and 19 when i got surgery, so she really could not have stopped me, legally. i suppose she mainly grieves knowing that had she had the right arguments she could have saved her kid this, but i've told her she is not to blame and i hope she recognizes that.
i haven't received any real harassment, not from anyone that i PERSONALLY know, though my family has received... harassment targeted at me? my sister had a classmate begin sending her copious pro-trans propaganda (contrapoints videos) which she instructed should be sent onward to me (sis did not comply). hilarious how my 10 years of direct experience is suddenly null and void and i'm assumed to know nothing about transness.... 6 months ago i was helping people sensitivity-write trans characters. now, i'm told i can't speak for the trans experience at all, and that i do not know what it's like to be a transmasc person. told that i need to listen to the arguments more carefully, that i don't LISTEN, when i literally lived this for 10 whole years. girl, on god? they tell me i don't get it and need to educate myself. and have empathy of course.
but in general, detransing, i've discovered that there are PLENTY of people who do not actually believe in genderism but who will play along simply out of fear or social pressure. my friends aside, who i knew through "queer" circles, everyone in my family (expect my mom) has revealed they never actually believed in it. i think this might contribute to why trans people bully dissenters so badly. they know this is the truth, that no one really buys it. i think, subconsciously, i have known that too. i never downloaded grindr, i never went into the men's bathrooms. i knew that despite testo and surgery and pronouns i could never challenge men as an equal in their eyes.
interestingly, making new friends is not that hard. I lead with the fact i'm detrans and "don't believe in all that shit" and people are VERY eager to be able to, suddenly, voice their real opinions without being called transphobic. they begin with probing questions, uncontroversial statements like "i agree they shouldn't put males in women's sports..." but if you continue to agree and not punish this daring on their part, they will reveal, with much relief and enthusiasm, what they really think. most people, normal people, really do not believe it all? i'm a brash person and can take irl confrontations quite well, hence i feel safe putting myself up as a transphobe off the bat. and people are very into this. so. the old ass saying, just be yourself.... normal people will not volunteer anti-genderist opinions on their own but when i continue to state thing after thing they open up and agree and eventually feel safe enough to admit their own thoughts. making friends, especially with non-gendie women, hasn't been that hard.
i'm going to write another message about same-sex attraction in the genderverse, but it's also a can of worms so i will make it separate from this one. again, thank you so much, for having anon on and listening, and letting us listen to each other without fear. i would hug you. to be continued
Thanks for the follow up!
My only comment is that I think most people play along out of kindness, it's not all bullying and fear, but that does impose a silence on everyone so everyone feels quite alone with their doubts.
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