#yes tim is a bard

[dcartcorner]

a fantasy/dnd au because i can't help myself and the thought of ancient blue dragon simon who disguises himself as a human brings me joy.

please enjoy this small one shot ft. s1 adventuring crew (please excuse any errors, writing is not my strong suit!)

Rumours at the Tavern Characters: Tim, Simon, Sasha, Martin, Jon Ships: none

It wasn’t what Tim would consider a nice tavern. He had performed in nicer ones, ones where the counters were meticulously cleaned and the patrons were at least passably polite to the serving staff, and a mug of ale would set you back a silver piece. This place was not quite like that.

Then again, Tim had been to worse sorts of dives.

The Lazy Storm sat right smack in the middle of the two kinds of taverns, perched on the cliff side overlooking the choppy seas of the western coast, amidst the fjords in the town of Killn’s Rest. Not a bad place, not a good place. Just a place, somewhere to  find some warmth, a quick meal, and something to drink. It was also the sort of tavern that didn’t take fire hazards all that seriously, if the number of people making merry that evening within its walls was any indication of the owner’s outlook on safety. It was busy, to the point where crowds spilled out onto the street even though the summer had come to a close and the winter, with its biting chill, was fast approaching.

Perhaps that’s why Tim noticed him - the old man. Because he was sitting on the bar top. 

There were few other seats around. Sasha had managed to charm their way to a table of their own earlier in the night while Martin tried to see about rooms, and their party had stayed planted at said table all night as the crowds slowly but surely filtered in for the evening. They were lucky, in this regard, as many other people were forced to stand shoulder to shoulder. Not that old man, though. Perched on the edge of the bar like a bird, smiling kindly at the person next to him.

And his choice of seat was not the only peculiar thing about him, Tim thought. He wore clothing that Tim could only describe as ornate. If this was one of those nice taverns Tim had played in, he might have expected that sort of the look, but this wasn’t one of those places. This was the Lazy Storm, and that man was incredibly overdressed. 

“It’s weird, right?” Tim said aloud. Martin looked up, then glanced around. Sasha craned her neck to look at him. Jon didn’t look up from his book. Tim nodded in the direction of the old man. “Someone dressed like that in a place like this. That’s odd, isn’t it?”

“Not really,” Sasha shrugged.

“Where?” Martin asked.

“Good on him, getting dressed up to go out for a night,” said Sasha. 

“I think it’s weird,” said Tim. Because it was. 

“Where?” Martin asked again. “Oh. Him? I mean. I suppose it’s… well, it’s a little odd.” The twist of a frown at the corners of Martin’s mouth. “Someone should offer him a seat.”

“Seems happy enough where he is,” Sasha said with a huff of a laugh as the other man at the bar leaned closer to the old man and whispered something to him. 

“Could we please focus,” Jon finally interjected, shutting the book. 

Tim rolled his eyes as he took a swig of his drink. It wasn’t silver coin ale. This was a copper-piece-per-tankard-ale, and it tasted like it. Which was to say, it tasted like a good night in the making.

“Have any of you actually asked anyone about any jobs yet?” Jon said.

“Asked just about as many people as you,” Tim said. By this, Tim meant: none. 

“There’s a rat problem in the sewers,” Sasha said, “according to one guard. Doesn’t pay well, but at least it pays.”

“There are bandits, too,” Martin added. “Uh, just out east of here. Somewhere. Apparently they have a den in the woods? But I think someone might’ve already taken that one.”

“Mm.” Jon was not impressed. He looked over at Tim. “Anything?”

Tim raised his hands. “Don’t look at me, I can get a job whenever.” Plenty of people out there who were willing to pay for some good music. “Or did you forget who bought the rooms and drinks?”

Jon leaned his elbows on the table and put his face in his hands momentarily. Then looked up at Tim and said, “Could you please just. Ask.”

“Jon, maybe we should just… take a night off?” Martin suggested. “It wouldn’t be the worst thing…”

Jon shot him a look and that was the end of that conversation.

Well, didn’t matter. Jon didn’t have to join them in having a good night if he didn’t want to. Tim wasn’t going to let it bother him, and he got up to go order another drink with his own hard earned money, ignoring how much lighter his coin purse was compared to earlier that day.

Why was it his problem anyway, that they didn’t have much in the way of coin? He wasn’t going to let it get to him. It wasn’t getting to him. He and Sasha and Martin were just some poor souls dragged along on Jon’s pointless quest to find some answers that had nothing to do with any of them. So why did it matter?

It didn’t matter.

Dammit. 

The old man was not the first person he asked that night about a job. As he waited for a drink he asked the person to his left and to his right, but neither of them were keen on talking - and it took him a little too long to realize they were part of their own adventuring party based on the matching bands on their arms, and wouldn’t be sharing any information with him. He tried to ask the bartender as well, but she was too busy to give him any answer that was not a look of inconvenience. 

Tim sighed. And he kept asking, until finally his route around the tavern brought him to the old man at the bar. Sat there, dressed strangely, looking for all the world like he should be just about anywhere else. 

“Are you quite alright?” the old man asked him. Tim blinked. “Not that I mind, but I’ve been told it’s rude to stare.”

Had he been staring? “Sorry,” Tim said. The old man smiled at him.

“Something I can do for you?” the old man asked. 

Tim looked around briefly. The other person with whom the old man had been speaking earlier that night was gone. “Don’t suppose there is,” Tim said. “Unless you know of any get rich quick jobs around this place.”

The old man chuckled. “Well now, I can think of a few, but I’m not entirely sure those are the type you’re looking for,” he said, resting his hands on the head of his cane which he had propped up on the empty edge of one of the bar-stools. “Tough times, out there. Or so I hear. Something about the supply and demand of it all, I think. Too many adventurers, too few problems that need solving! At least around these parts.” The old man sighed thoughtfully. “This coast isn’t what it used to be. Time was you couldn’t take two steps on the road without running into bandits or cultists or a proper mountain troll. Now you’d be lucky to find a good sized rat nest to clean up.”

“Yeah, well. Killing rats doesn’t pay well,” Tim said. 

The old man smiled, watching Tim over the rim of his glasses. His eyes were sharply blue, Tim noticed. “No,” the man agreed. “No it doesn’t.” He tilted his head. “Terribly sorry, but I’m afraid you’ll have to go further afield to find anything.”

“Thanks anyway,” Tim said, defeated. 

“Although,” the old man said as Tim was turning away. Tim paused and looked back at him. “I’ve heard a rumour. There have been a few ships that have come into the harbour with some particularly strange news out of the Shivering Straight. Up north. Word is there have been a handful of whaling ships that have gone missing around Helkelson Bay. Only a couple of survivors. Those that do manage to best the frostbite say… well. You know how sailors can be, always creating the most fanciful stories. A ghost ship, they say! The mayor of Helkelson isn’t altogether convinced it’s anything so peculiar as that, though I hear he’s offering a handsome reward to anyone willing to… solve the problem. Whatever that problem may be.”

“Helkelson?” Tim said. 

“That’s right,” the old man replied with a smile. “Ask around the docks, I’d say. Plenty of merchant ships coming and going that way. Of course, it’s only a rumour.”

Tim smiled back. “Better than nothing.”

It was at that moment the old man’s companion returned and gave Tim a wary look. Tim took it as his cue to leave with a nod of thanks and an imaginary tip of the hat before he returned to the table to join his companions. 

“Let me start,” he said to them, “by saying you’re welcome. Now, any of you been to the Shivering Straight?”

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

HEY HEY MAC. QUESTION. now that you’re familiar with vash what would u classpect him. i said he’d be a page probably (yk long journey which ends in unfathomable power) and ros said maybe page of life but they also said maybe muse of blood which. is a classpect for him that drive me crazy bonkers. i was also v partial to prince/bard of doom. do u have Thoughts

OHHH FUCK YEAH CLASSPECT QUESTION. YES PLEADE I LOVE TALKING CLASSPECTS MORE THAN ANYTHING I ALWAYS HAVE CLASSPECT THOUGHTS. OUGH OK.

Initial thought was also page!!!! page is a good class for him i think. page of life specifically works REALLY well, i think vash is a stronger life player than a blood player. (in a similar vein. perhaps knight of life. i think making vash and knives both life players but vash is a knight/page and knives is a prince. ough.)

ON THE OTHER HAND. I ALWAYS FORGET MUSE AND LORD ARE AN OPTION. HOLY SHIT. consider perhaps. muse of life vash, lord of doom (or rage? maybe rage.) knives.

[magicians-abode]

hii!! i first wanted to say that you're doing well and taking care of yourself :) could i request headcanons for chilchuck from delicious in dungeon where the reader is kind of like the bard of the party? and maybe they stay up late writing songs and chil ends up saying up with them? you can do what you like with it other than that but i like sharing ideas (and i love chilchuck :3) i hope you have a good day!! 💜💚

Hiii! I'm so happy to get a request, I forgot how exciting it was to open my askbox and read that someone wanted me to write them something (can you tell youre the first one yet?). I know you asked for headcannons, but I got carried away and ended up making it a fic I believe, by the way I wrote it. I still hope you like it! If not I'll try my best to specifically do headcannons next time if you ask 🌸✨️ (also have a good day too)

"Late Night Songs"

[Chilchuck Tims x Bard!reader]

Warnings: none - gn!bard!reader - fluff

Being the bard of the group was rather hard. Why? Well, writing songs and seeing if they ended up sounding good wasn't easy. (y/n) needed a lot of creativity for that. Luckily for them, they had a source for it: Chilchuck.

Yes, that guy in their group everyone treated like a child sometimes just because of his height. And while it was very adorable, yes, (y/n) saw a lot of depth in his personality.

Tonight they had decided to stay up, which many might say was not a good idea considering the fact they were exploring a dungeon. But they didn't care, they wanted to write, to compose something new.

And so they stared at the sheet of paper in front of them, their instrument by their side as they sat away from the fire so as to not bother or wake up the rest.

Entranced in their thoughts, they didn't notice when Chilchuck stirred in his bedroll to then wake up with a huff at the inability of going back to sleep, sitting up and looking at the fire that had not gone out yet.

That's when with his amplified hearing, he heard the sound of a pen writing down on a paper.

He looked behind him and found (y/n), sitting rather far from them. When had they woken up? Or had they not been able to sleep at all? What were they writing that was so important at this time?

All those questions filled his head as he got up slowly, trying to not make much noise for everyone's sake.

(y/n) raised their head at the sound of rustling and found their muse, standing up and looking at them, now approaching. He rubbed the sleep off of his eyes as he walked to them and sat by their side. —What are you doing up so late?— His groggy voice asked softly.

—I'm trying to write a song, or to at least think of a new melody, but I can't seem to come up with anything— they said as they looked at him, noticing a sleepy smile.

Chilchuck sighed, looking at the rest of the party, all in a deep sleep. —Well I can't seem to fall sleep anymore, I'm really not comfortable with how hard the floor feels today. Mind if I stay up with you?— He took a quick peek at the paper, but saw nothing written. They really had some artistic block, huh?

(y/n) smiled at their question, excited to finally have spend some peaceful time alone with him— Not at all, you might help inspire my new song in fact— they winked, and Chilchuck felt his heart leap in his chest at the gesture. He really hoped the darkness of the night helped hide the embarrassment in his face. It was a simple wink, what was wrong with him? he thought, shaking his head.

He chuckled softly, his gaze moving away from them for a moment in embarrassment— Don't say those things— he rubbed the back of his neck— thank you though, it's... flattering— he admitted with a sheepish smile.

—In fact, you've always been my inspiration. I'm not gonna lie to you— God his heart was about to stop. Had he heard them right? What did that even mean?

—I have?— He didn't know how to ask without looking too excited about it.

—Of course, you're practically my muse— they noticed him staring with slightly wide eyes at their sudden confession.— I don't know but– you just have something that always makes me stare and it makes the inspiration bubble up inside of me— okay today was definitely going to be his funeral. Chilchuck swallowed harshly, a blush definitely burning bright on his cheeks as he kept silent, his brain failing to come up with an answer.

He watched them suddenly gasp and start to write down something on the paper that rested on their thighs. (y/n) mumbled to themselves as they kept writing, a sudden urge of inspiration rushing through them.

They look up again quickly at him, a light in their eyes.— Ah– I almost forgot to thank you.— they smiled at him with sincerity and gave his hand a quick squeeze, at which he just nodded, humming in response as they watched them write down their ideas, praying to whatever deity was out there to make his blush go away.

He would've never guessed he was helpful in more ways than just picking locks and finding traps. But thanks to them, now he knows he is, for (y/n) at least, a source of inspiration. And their heart swelled with emotion and pride at that.

[on-the-clear-blue]

Batfam playing dnd cus why not

Tim, the dm because fuck Bruce being it: I swear to God Damian, for the fifth time, no you can not be a half Demon half Angle assassin that is 20th level, we are starting at level two and just pick from the common races!

Damian, crossing his arms: than I shall play a 'teefling' and I demand to the Rouge, Drake.

Tim: Well tough shit brat, Steph already chose that, be a paladin so Bruce can't take it.

Damian: Tt I shall kill brown and take my rightful class...but for now I shall play a paladin.

---

Tim: Cass, honey, darling. Sweet summer child...what?

Cass, grinning ear to ear :roll to seduce dragon?

Tim:

Cass:

Tim:

Cass, playing a bard: ;3

---

Dick: okay so I hope up on the table, over this guy and then try and hit the big bandit dude?

Tim, questioning God as why he was born: Dick. Your playing a Barbarian. You have a dex bonus of 2.

---

Jason: Alphandrill the wise will draw her oaken wand, it was taken from the same tree her grand father planted many centuries ago that was stuck by lighting, wielding it with determination, she points it at the bandit leader and shoots out a blast of molten flames! They glimmer with a sparkle of electricity as it strikes out against him!

Jason: does a 12 hit?

Tim, so done with this: no

---

Bruce: okay so I just roll right? With the...short sword?

Tim: ur actually Batman how is dnd stumping you.

Bruce: I played second edition growing up with Harvey and Ollie, I hardly ever got past the first fight

(Que Bruce having Vietnam flashbacks to his carefully crafted characters dying in the grind stone that was Dnd 2e)

---

Tim: Thanks for joining Alfred, I know that you probably don't even know how to play but it's making Bruce really happy to have everyone together

Alfred, who was an actor for so many years: worry not master Tim, I think this old dog can show you pups a few tricks~

(Alfred pulls out a pre-made mini, it's made out of bat grade materials, he knows the rules front to back)

---

Duke: this...is a lot? Tim I have Dm'ed a bit if you want me to...why are you looking at me like that.

Tim, frothing at the mouth: you...you wanna take over? Does this mean...I can play?

Duke, seriously reconditioning becoming apart of the wanye family: y-yes?

Forever Dm Tim: sweet baby Batman your going to get fucked Duke, but thank you so much for this...

[zahri-melitor]

There's this thing that I've noticed on my Birds of Prey and Batgirl read, that I can probably use Burnside as a dividing line on:-

Post 2014, there's definitely been a shift to portray BOP and Batgirl as the 'girls team', to the exclusion of non-female characters.

Like do not get me wrong. Birds of Prey has always been at its heart about a small group of women working together (and frequently against the forces of misogyny). But it wasn't exclusionary. Dixon's run has Ted Kord and Jason Bard and Dick and Tim as supporting characters through it. Simone's BOP runs have Savant and Creote as antagonists and supports, they have Dawn Granger AND Hank Hall. There are male heroes around and supporting!

The premise was 'Barbara calls in the characters she sees that she needs for this mission' and sometimes that is her close friends and allies, and sometimes it's very pointedly people she's not close to because she's pushing people away for Reasons, and sometimes it's the only person who has the skillset she needs, and sometimes it's because she's meddling and trying to reform someone, and so on. She has complicated reasoning for how she puts a team together, and who she calls on for assistance.

And yes, part of the point of BOP is to showcase the wide range of talent available in female DC characters for any scenario you can think of, why are you not building teams that are at least 50% women more often?

But there's this trend that starts emerging from n52 onwards, particularly once Simone is removed from the books, where the titles sort of stop interacting with male heroes outside of dating them. No, why are you calling up all the female vigilantes in Gotham to help with this situation but none of the men, even when you're actually closer to a number of the guys? Is there a reason that there's a no-men gas or something? No?

I love seeing strong women heroes who are friends and who are enemies and who fight together and have complex relationships. I love the depth! But also it feels super walled off and unnecessarily inverted to only allow men in as characters to DATE, when from the very beginning they've been used to build characterisation and showcase the women's skills.

[arrowheadedbitch]

I just imagined your meta Tim saying "the only thing I haven't seen in another universe is villain songs not being the catchiest songs ever."

Also, would different universes have different versions of the same songs? Like a world where the g**** bard song from Friendship is Witchcraft is just called Pinkie's bard song and that song says "magic" or something instead of the g slur in the chorus? (I can see Tim using a version of that song without the g slur to cheer up a kid who's house burned down or something...) Has Tim seen a universe where mlp is the real word?

Oh wow, uh I guess yes, yes, and yes?

Anything that can be imagined can be an alternate universe because their are infinite universes and multiverses, how this helps

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Some Game HC's I have about Riddler:

BTAS Riddler loves playing DnD both as a player (always a caster) and as the DM. He is a game developer in the 90's so you bet your ass he was the fliperama kid. Everyday he went to the local game station (and later started exploring and looking for different ones all across Gotham) with only one coin. He played once against a player in a winning streak beting coins and he always won and would accept bets from challengers. He was abble to play all day with only one coin because he never lost a bet.

Gotham Riddler is another DnD nerd and a gamer. But I think he had more money growing up than BTAS Riddler and actually played games in a gameboy. He got a summer job so he could buy more games than Mario and Pokemon. Also I'm sorry but Gotham Riddler never played DnD, that man was born to be a DM and is likely the one DM that didn't became one because it's harder to find a DM than a party so you DM once and now that's your fate.

Arkham Riddler plays Magic The Gathering. He also plays DnD and he is the insufurable player that goes out of the way to create the most OP characthers completly full of combos and makes everything boring for everyone else because he slays too hard. He is insuferable playing Magic as well but at least he is being insuferable against his adversaries. He lost his original deck after being arrested the first time and somehow it ended on young Barbara Gordon's hands. The small time period were pre teen Barbara was the biggest Magic nerd and forced a confused Jim to play was probably the worst thing Riddler ever did to comissioner Gordon and that includes killing his co-workers and friends. Later Barbara went to play it with Jason and Tim (who she isn't dating cause ew), Bernard joined at some point.

The last DnD player is Unburied Riddler who is the opposite to Arkham: he always plays as a bard and he is the biggest follower of the rule of cool/the wonders of RP ever. He knows the rule book upside down but he never really followed the rules, he just sweet talks the DM and the tabble into letting him role for his insane plans to the point that after he basically forced Barbara and Bruce to play with him (Barbara asked Montoya to DM) no one on the tabble even knew what bardic inspiration actually did until Alfred heard them playing and as a closeted DnD nerd got incrisingly distressed by Eddie's "gameplay style". Since then Montoya joined the tabble as a paladim and Alfred is the DM. Instead of analysing what to pick to upgrade his characther Eddie spends all the time trying to find ways to sweet talk Alfred (the hardest DM to bullshit ever) into letting him do his thing. Right now his best trick is to make Bruce either join or get excited for the result because Alfred has a soft spot for his son Master Bruce.

Zero Year Riddler for all his cool persona is a nerd and not only he colects all different editions of War (yes the boardgame, the ancient Greece one is his favorite) but he plays competitive Pokemon (both online and the card game). While he is a good Pokemon player he did lose to an incredible good 12yo and he cried a whole day before trying to extract revenge. Unfortunaly for Ed the kid was from Metropolis and there was a change, small as it was, that Superman could get involved and Eddie isn't really one to get his ass beat by Superman.

Still on the card games BTAA Riddler plays Yu-Gi-Oh. He somehow understands the rules and is good on it. Miss Tuesday used to make fun of him for it until Autum acidentaly introduced her to Bakugan. If you play Bakugan you can't make fun of other people's card game choices. BTAA Riddler also plays Pokemon Go, he started because he thought it was hip and cool (he isn't even that old, he is like 30 but he just wants to be cool with the teens that badly already) and kept going because he really likes to take random pictures of pokemon on normal day things, he also loves shinny hunting. He does it on the actual game as well. He never actually played the whole Pokemon story, he just shinny hunts a lot and stops playing after he catched enough cool shinnies. He has some of the first one to capture the shinng videos and a shinny hunting secret twitter.

[Not a Riddler one but BTAS Joker also plays Yu-Gi-Oh because one has to be mad to understand all the different invocation rules (I say that as a former Yu-Gi-Oh nerd). Harley also plays Yu-Gi-Oh on BTAS but she downplays her talents to let Joker win when she is actually insanely good at it.]

[spacefinch]

MSB kids are doing DND. What chaos would happen while they roleplay as civilians in a fantasy world?

Classes:

Mikey: Dungeon master (DM). If he's not DMing, he plays Artificer.

Phoebe: Druid

Carlos: Artificer (sometimes he plays as a bard)

DA: Wizard (and secondary DM)

Tim: Bard

Wanda: Fighter

Keesha: Ranger

Ralphie: Barbarian or Warlock

Arnold: Cleric

Headcanons:

Hugo the Orangutan (from that one Wild Kratts episode) is a recurring NPC. He appears in almost every campaign, and every time, he has a quest for the DND party.

Mikey has several pieces of paper that say "Loading" with random DND tips (like video game loading screen tips) that he slots into his DM screen whenever he needs some time to think or look up rules or whatnot.

One time, the gang uses Chinese fortune cookies instead of dice. Instead of rolling, they would eat the cookies, read their fortunes aloud, and let the DM decide what it means.

Example:

Mikey: Okay guys, eat for initiative.

*Everyone reaches into a large bowl of fortune cookies in the center of the table*

Ralphie, who was way to eager: Mine says, "Every flower blooms in its own sweet time."

Mikey: You go last.

Mikey: As the party travels, you encounter a fork in the road...

Carlos: I pick it up.

Mikey: Really, bro?

Almost everyone has played as a spell-casting class at one point or another. Wanda and Carlos are no longer allowed to do so because A) Wanda uses very destructive spells (mainly fireball) and Carlos only uses spells that do stupid things.

Carlos and Mikey: *explaining how they're making a fog machine to fill with holy water to make an area of permanent damage against the vampire lord*

D.A. (the dungeon master for that round): ...

Sometimes the Wild Kratts team joins in the DND fun. It gets ten times more chaotic when they join. The members of the team take turns being the DM.

Keesha: Oh wow, this shop has everything my heart desires!

Mikey (voicing the "spooky shopkeeper" NPC): Yes, I will warn you... every item comes with a price.

Keesha: Yes, I know how shops work.

Mikey: The price may be more than you expect to pay.

Keesha: Yes, I know how US taxes work, too.

Mikey, increasingly exasperated: I'm trying to tell you that I'm evil and offering these wares with no regard for the harm they will do!

Keesha, also increasingly exasperated: I know what capitalism is too, goddammit.

More headcanons:

The DND party is EASILY distracted. A cat? Gotta stop and pet it. There's free food? Gotta try it! There's a monster terrorizing a village (and it's not the main quest)? Well, you can't just turn a blind eye to that! And you certainly can't ignore all these shiny rocks!

One time (as an experiment), everyone played a non-magic class for their DND characters. It did not go well.

[sweetdreamsjeff]

Jeff Buckley: They Don't Even Know Me Yet

Martin Aston, MOJO, January 2003

In 1992 Jeff Buckley gave his first ever press interview. A decade later, MOJO unearths this incredible, little-seen document.

AUTUMN IN NEW YORK, 1992. A tiny East Village cafe, the Sin-e. It's packed, but there's a seat near the very front, under the singer's nose. His, eyes are clenched shut. He's nervous, edgy, but it's a truly memorable show; jittery, comical, thrilling, mesmeric. When he's singing the voice is pure, stretching high-low, curling around a song. He closes on a song that could very well be a lullaby, and your eyes close with his.

Three days later, in another tiny cafe, via a mutual friend who knows Tim Buckley is your all-time favourite singer, and who told you, 'You gotta hear his son', you meet Jeff. He's dressed down — plaid shirt, jeans — which draws you to the face; short, thatched hair, looming eyes, rich lips, a wary expression. It's his first ever interview, and he's nervous, defensive. The first thing he says, almost before handshakes, is whether you're here purely because of Tim. No, but then again, yes. He accepts that there's little point writing about Jeff simply because you love Tim, any more than you can avoid Tim because of Jeff. In the end, only Dutch magazine OOR takes a chance on an interview with a total unknown: based, of course, on the familial connection to Tim. The interview is never published in the UK. By the time everyone catches up with Jeff the interview is out of date. But now, given his death and enshrined appeal, it's timeless.

When did music first make an impact on you?

As a child. There was my mother's breasts and then there was music. It felt like another person in the house that floated with me everywhere. All my life, I've sung along to the radio, stuff like [Spiral Staircase's] 'I Love You More Today Than Yesterday'. My mum would drive me to school, playing mellow Californian radio, stuff like Chicago, Crosby Stills and Nash, Blood Sweat and Tears, Sly and the Family Stone, James Brown, The Temptations, every day! She married a car mechanic, who couldn't carry a tune, but he had amazing taste and he turned me on to Booker T, Led Zeppelin and Joni Mitchell, Hoyt Axton and Willie Nelson. My mum pretty much sung to me — she's a classically-trained pianist and cellist. So it was mainly me and my mum, because my parents split before I was born. I hung around my grandmother too — she'd play me stuff like The Chambers Brothers.

It's rare to hear someone smitten with both traditional blues and modern blues. I'm thinking of your cover of 'Fare Thee Well'.

That's Dink's Song. It was originally written by a washerwoman. That's where the best music came from, from old European-American criminals bringing Africans to America. My favourites are Robert Johnson and Bukka White, The Staple Singers, Billie Holiday. I cover 'Strange Fruit', too. I figured I wouldn't be able to meet these people, so I learn from them by hearing them sing. Some of the coolest music is Johnny Cash, which isn't a black or white thing. I love Mariachi music, Ray Charles, Edith Piaf, the Sex Pistols, Muddy Waters…I just saw gifts dangling from them and wanted to take it. I guess I want to be an archetypal entertainer, an archetypal bard, a minstrel. I guess I have a romantic vision. Even though punk happened to me, and Robert Johnson, I want to be a realty good storyteller, and those songs have great stories.

What do you love about 'Twelfth Of Never'?

I cover the Nina Simone version. It's just the way she does it. I can't get into Elvis's version, it doesn't capture my imagination, though he had a beautiful voice. Every time I hear 'Can't Help Falling In Love', I cry. I can't separate Charles Manson from The Beatles or the Clambake movie from Elvis, though. But I love all music. I'm the Cocteau Twins' biggest fan, too. They allow their deepest eccentricities to be the music itself, and not just something they want to project. Liz Fraser is one of the only originals. They're just regular people, too. I got to meet her once, she was very shy, which puts a weird curve on music as well. Imagine that sound coming out of her mouth when she's in the kitchen scrambling eggs.

Was music your first true love?

Besides sex? One surrounds the other. I can remember being obsessed with my stepfather's stereo, getting into trouble for using it. He was really possessive of control over it, like a car. It was expensive equipment, so I was really careful. Then one day, I wanted to listen to a live bootleg of Jimi Hendrix, and he went mad. I had a tape player in my room, I shared it with another kid in the family. You had to stick a hanger in it for it to work.

How do you feel when you open your mouth and sing?

Like it's real. I feel like crying. I feel like I am crying! It's the middle point between laughing and immense joy and crying. I feel the best when I'm singing.

When did you start?

In front of an audience at a family get-together. My stepfather got drunk and fell asleep in front of everyone, and my grandmother got really embarrassed, so to direct attention away from him, I sung every Elton John song I knew. I was a huge fan then. They gave me some silver dollars for doing it. I was 13 (laughs). My friend and I started play electric guitars, you know, 'Stairway To Heaven', for a talent show at junior high school. We lost…We were living in southern California then. I later had a band in northern California, in Willetts, called Axxis. It wasn't my idea. It's one of the 19 cities I've lived in, I attended four high schools. One I spent two weeks in. My mum was quite a gypsy.

What did you make of your own voice?

I hated it, but I got over it. I'm horribly self-critical. I think the first time I heard it, I thought no way could I ever keep anything from anyone, it was all there in the voice. Some ways that people sing, they put it across in language, and it's almost impossible, because they have a wall between them and the expression. I'm trying to get deeper in the hole, trying to learn things when I hear voices.

Did the concept of singing on a stage come easily to you?

It was totally natural, I just did it. It was like going to the beach, like, I'm going into the ocean! I never thought about it. I first sang at a dance in Northern California Methodist Church, to high school kids. When I was 13, I already knew what I wanted to do. My all-time favourite was Led Zeppelin, and I knew I wanted to belong to that. In the '70s, there was an overspill of rock life, which becomes coffee table material, with books on Kiss and rock stars on TV. I knew it was possible for some people to do it for a living. I spent hours listening to Magical Mystery Tour. I felt like an archaeologist, which is fine, because I liked dinosaurs! But that was the wrong direction.

I left home when I was 17, because I was tired of moving around. I played in lots of LA bands, just to make money. There was a reggae band for a while, The AKB Band, a rag-tag motley crew, with one rasta guy. I played guitar. We ended up backing up U-Roy, Shinehead and Judy Mowatt, and at the Bob Marley day at Long Beach. We did cheesy session work for demos, too.

What did the experience teach you?

The simplicity. I guess it didn't teach me much at the time. It's like your parents telling you what not to do. But Pablo, the rasta, everything he said about playing makes sense now. Forget the next band. I then decided not to spread myself that thin. I didn't like southern California, LA especially. Hollywood isn't a real town, but that's the reality of it. I'd wanted to see New York since I saw it on TV when I was 12, to experience the energy, so I took off in 1990. I got a couple of jobs, and went hungry for a long while, before I got an offer to record songs in LA, so I flew back, and recorded four songs. I went back-and-forth a bit, before I met Gary Lucas at a show in New York, at a tribute show to my father. I thought playing with Gary would be interesting but it turned out to be a disaster. We had two completely different paths…the cart was before the horse. But I learnt to go out and sing, in impossibly intimate settings, when guys are right up against you. You learn how to move a room. The biggest challenge is to put a song across live. The audience shouldn't see your face, or your body, they should just hear you.

Do you enjoy the New York scene?

I dig it. If I was in LA, I wouldn't be doing anything, but here, there's a real respect. There's a respect for anything original. Maybe I'm overpoweringly romanticising New York, but so many amazing things happen here on an ordinary level, like Lou Reed lives here, wow! I first heard him in '76 but he got into my soul, it just takes one time, like Helen Keller…it's just the sound of the song. I was in somebody else's car, feeling lonely. Heroin is so beautiful, like a big black kiss, the way it builds. He sounds like a punk who knows everything. He's got such erudition, but he's not too smart.

What stage are you at right now?

Always at the beginning. I'd love to make a record. Clive Davis at Arista wanted to sign me but he hadn't heard me, it was just on the basis of what his right hand man, the head of A&R, had said. I plan to start from what matters. In September, I'll perform all new material, a lot of covers, and I wanna find people to play with. Yeah, a band, just because of the certain feeling I need. An energy.

Can I raise the delicate matter of your dad, Tim?

Sometimes, with people who knew him, they've come for a nice night out, but they see me, they don't think about him. Those who do, I don't hang around them. We're different. The people who knew him, they have apparently a very magic memory, but it's been a claustrophobic thing all my life. I knew him for a total of nine days. He never wrote, never called.

Do people claim that you're just your father's son?

If anyone mentions that, I walk. If I go to a club, and some writer uses that area, then I rip the shit down and say, Fuck you, see you later, we can talk about this next time, because I'm on my own.

Do you listen to his records?

Yeah, mostly to learn about him as a person. He wrote a couple of songs about me and my mother, which is sometimes tough. His style has nothing to do with what I do. It's funny that we were born with the same parts, but when I sing, it's me. Technically, I can do what he did, but our expression is not the same, it's a completely different sphere. His was a different time, influenced by Dylan and the folkies. I don't even talk like him. But I can do a good impersonation of him, knitting up my eyebrows, which makes people laugh.

As far as music goes, so many people who I know and love, who give me so much, they don't even know me yet. I want to make something completely new. I was into Miles Davis in 1984, he said he could tell when people were paying tribute to him but it was just copying. The only way to pay tribute is to bring something new to the fold. I want to work so hard that everything of me bums away, like the chemical in the match. Which leaves what really is me, or what I think is me. It can be such a joy. Like the Beatles, they were geniuses, you know? Music's like a sign language between people, so when a guy from Iran or America hears The Beatles, they go 'Wow!' They don't think of killing each other. There's something about music that hits the cavemen in us, even more than a speech or painting. I just want to achieve my own vibe. I want to go someplace else. There's more ways of saying 'I love you', more ways of saying 'where the hell do I fit in?', more ways of saying 'why doesn't anyone love me?, 'when is somebody going to want to kiss me?' I'm sick of waiting, waiting to be understood. And it's nothing arty, nothing lofty, it's just fucking different, and I want to leave this world behind a little so that maybe I will see that it's bigger and I haven't left it at all.

[halfagone]

DPxDC Ship Week 2023 - Day 4

@dpxdcshipweek

Rated: T

Ship Chosen: Cassandra Wayne/Danny Fenton (Dead Silent (I believe?))

Summary: Only the dead have wings. Unless you've died before and came back to life, as it turns out, in which case it may take one to five years for that to kick in. Or something. Cass isn't really sure how it works either.

Excerpt without context:

“Miss Cassandra! There is someone at the door who wishes to speak with you,” Alfred’s voice floated down the hall, piquing Cass’ curiosity. She did not get many visitors, even more now that her wings had grown in and they had been forced to hide those in her civilian identity. But Cass liked to have her wings out at home, which unfortunately meant that she did not have her special jacket hiding them now. But she peeked around the corner to snatch a glimpse at the front door, just to see who was there.

It was a messenger. With glowing orange eyes and deep violet skin and a pair of beautiful, glassy fairy wings. Huh. One of Phantom’s servants, then?

She shuffled towards Alfred, her wings on full display, as she figured that there was no reason to hide them in front of the bard.

“You are Cassandra Wayne, yes? Known as the vigilante Starling?” The bard inquired to her, to which she nodded. And then, without further adieu, the bard rolled open a scroll and announced, “His Majesty, High King of the Infinite Realms, Daniel Phantom-” and since when did Phantom have a first name? “Wishes to invite the Lady Cassandra of House Wayne,” ooh, fancy, “to an intimate meal in his home. What shall your response be?”

“You got a date with a King?” Jason deadpanned in shock.

“‘High King’ to be precise,” Tim muttered to their brother, nudging him with an elbow.

[cassandrasdreamworlds]

i am SO sorry i saw this so late lmao but @violaceum-vitellina-viridis tagged me in a self promo tag game! (which they stole from @inexplicifics apparently xD)

to encourage some self promo, how about sharing your top fics no matter how big or small - give us the links to your wonderful words with the Most hits/Most kudos/Most comments/Most bookmarks /Most words/Least words

I already know which fic is gonna come out on top regardless of category xD which means i will just leave out the top fic in the following categories so i dont slap in the link for my big fic 5 times in a row lmao

MOST HITS: very unsurprising but also still surprising because I never thought it would get that big but it's my fic from every height I’d fall I’d call a DC|Batfam fic with fucked up time wibbly wobbly reincarnation and slow build

MOST KUDOS: VERY surprising because i basically never check my stats page and didnt notice this fic sneak itself that high (except yknow. every height) but its bathroom break or a statistically unlikely number of kids stacked into a bathroom which is my DC|Batkids comedy crack fic and a take on the Wayne GalaTM trope

MOST COMMENTS: ... huh well I do get a decent amount of comments tbh but this one did surprise me a lot. it's (after every height) i’ll scream, but you won’t hear - ‘forget me not’  which is the third part in a series featuring an amnesiac Witcher AU - as in yes most of the characters forgot Jaskier the Bard has ever existed. it is VERY angst and mind the tags but i have since abandoned the series, though the first part can be read without reading the series if you dont mind a sad ending

MOST BOOKMARKS: in first... AFTER every height and bathroom break are at the moment two fics tied at 149 bookmarks the first one is in wonderment, at you and yours which is a Witcher fic with Geralt/Jaskier, 6k words of smut and strength kink the second is dragonology a DC|Batfam fic where Tim after getting injured and his body going "nope ive had enough" finds out that he's actually a dragon shifter

MOST WORDS: i don't think i can actually get around explicitly mentioning every height here since it is my longest fic and getting longer with atm 60k, second in line is we'll all be the weak and the weary sometime a rare pair Witcher fic with Regis/Roche - yes the vampire Regis and yes Vernon Roche of the Blue Stripes from TW2 and TW3, it's got 17k and is a short developing relationship fic and with the best meet ugly ive written so far

LEAST WORDS: .................................. do I. do I have to. really? ughhhhhh okay I'll link it if ONLY for baby Cas who was very proud of it - anyway comfort a Yuri on Ice fluff Yuuri/Viktor piece that I wrote when I was like. what? 16? pls keep that in mind if you do read it but my advice is. don't xDDD

tagging: @brothebro @childoffantasy @1flyingcat @ironhoshi @itsfirecat @howdidthisevenhappenanyway @bard-llama and anyone else who wants to spread some self promo around!

[accidental-spice]

4, 5, 11, and 15 for Tim Bradford, Lucy Chen, and Bilbo Baggins!

#4: If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

I think I'd put Tim in a King Arthur story. He'd make a GREAT knight, and I feel like he'd handle not having modern conveniences fairly well

Lucy would DEFINITELY go into the Star Wars universe. Finally, some common sense in there. OH MY STARS SHE'D PSYCHOANALYSE ANAKIN THAT'D BE BEAUTIFUL

And Bilbo... maybe King Arthur as well! He could be their bard

#5: What's the first sing that comes to kind when you think of them?

Tim and Lucy's is the same: Soldier by James TW!

And Bilbo... probably The Last Goodbye, though I know it's a bit obvious

#11: Would you date this character?

... this feels targeted

Yes, I suppose I would date Tim, hypothetically. Not Lucy, though, and Bilbo's not my type. Also he's 111

#15: What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not)

Obviously, for Tim and Lucy, it's each other!! For Bilbo, I can't say I have one

Thanks for the ask!!

[bruggle]

Woe skylander ocs upon ye

Only two of these guys have visuals because I can't draw

So this is Tim and Mothy

They are life element, and I do not have a catch phrase for them.

Tim is the dinosaur-esque guy, and Mothy is... the moth. Yeah, she's supposed to be a moth. Their backstory is that basically, Mothy is a horse girl. She befriended a wild dinosaur that has exactly one braincell dinking around in his head despite her parents warning her to stay away, and then wound up saving the town with him from raiders. Yes, they are 101% based on Godzilla and Mothra. And the names are funny.

Second, we got Reborn

She is an undead Phoenix, and her catchphrase is "Back from the blink!"

So she originally was a regular old Phoenix until one of her friends was captured by Count Moneybones and taken to the land of the undead. She went to save them, but wound up cursed because of it. Thus, she was offered a spot as a skylander. I'm still kind of working on her, but hey. A creature that is famous for never dying being of the undead element is a pretty cool concept imo.

Now, this intentionally edgy girl is Jinx. Well, she's supposed to be more punk than edge, but perhaps I failed in that department lol

She is Dark element, and her catchphrase is "Not your lucky day!"

So she is a black cat with two tails, basically mixing the western superstition of black cats and Japanese folklore/superstition of the nekomata. It's been a while since I last read up on them, but iirc cats of a certain age were considered unlucky due to the idea that they could possibly sprout a second tail and gain supernatural power. So she just basically has the power of bad luck on top of being a cat (think Jinx from Teen Titans (I am very original lmao))

Her backstory is basically that she was a misguided teen who caused a lot of trouble with her powers in the village she grew up in. Until she took it too far and nearly destroyed it. Granted, she was also the reason it WASN'T destroyed, but at that point, the townsfolk had had enough of her shenanigans. So she was basically offered the choice between Skylands version of Juvie or to go to the Skylander Academy and become a Skylander for x amount of time as a form of community service. She obviously chose community service. She's not entirely sure if she wants to be a Skylander forever, but she's slowly warming up to the idea. Camo and Sunburn have kind of taken her under their wing as pranksters tho lol

Next we got Bard.

He's magic element, but I don't have a catchphrase for him either.

He basically has a magical instrument that he has used to write stories and songs with and has traveled all over Skylands to share them. But he has also defended multiple villages from all sorts of raiders. Eventually, Eon tracked him down and offered him a spot as a skylander, to which he agreed, provided he could still partake in his hobby.

This guy also isn't super fleshed out, but idk he's kinda cool.

[gaykarstaagforever]

Todd.

Brinewater Grotto is part of a Thieves' Guild mission. Why is it filled with 15 bandits? How do I RP a mage / thief in a cave where there is literally no option to not kill everyone?

"YOU CAN SNEAK-ATTACK THEM!"

I don't want to fuxking sneak-attack them! The point is, I shouldn't be forced to murder a bus-load of people at ANY POINT in a Thieves' Guild quest.

"JUST SNEAK PAST ALL OF THEM!"

Right. In the cave-maze filled with traps. And even if manage to get to Gulum-Ei, and confront him, how the fuxk do I get out of here without fighting everyone?

"YOU CAN KILL HIM BEFOREHAND AND SKIP ALL THAT!"

Oh. I can murder him. For a THIEVES' GUILD quest.

This is so stupid. Why am I wasting my time? This is like the Bards' College quest being "go kill trolls."

You can't RP as anything in this game besides "a kind of serial killer." I didn't realize it was this rock-stupid. There are just zero options besides murder. And murdering with spells is not a world of difference from murdering with anything else. THE MURDER PART IS THE THING I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS TIME.

At least Fallout had more speech checks. Skyrim is just cul-de-sac after cul-de-sac of murder sprees.

That's fine when I want to murder. But if I don't, I guess I fuxk off and go play an old Tim Cain game.

YES, some murder is fine. I'm the Dragon Born. But there should be options in quests, and different quest lines for different builds. I didn't realize how weak and lazy this is.

I'm not doing this anymore. It's not fun. Killing with spells is not mage enough for the Mages' Club.

[late-to-the-magnus-archives]

"Corrupted" Snippet - The Magnus Archives x Malevolent WIP

Danny Stoker died trying to keep a weird, cursed book away from some very bad people.

Tim has the book.

Tim has no idea.

Opening it has thrust him into an entirely new world.

A snippet in which Tim tried to find help at the Magnus Institute, and did not - and the conversation thereafter is beginning to make him wonder what is truly inside his head.

(thunder)

-------------------------

Stairs just ahead. Take your time.

He does, one step at a time, using the excuse of concentration to be silent.

He wipes his leaky eyes.

Are you all right?

“No. Gonna have to be, though, apparently, because I don’t want to take his deal.”

I promise you, Bouchard will be watching us regardless of what we do.

“Well, fuck that guy, then,” says Tim. “I guess consent isn’t on some fear god’s radar.”

John snorts. I don’t know why you ever thought it would be. You’re at the bottom. Where now?

“I don’t know. I’m trying to think. Can I just walk somewhere? Get away from this place?”

Walk to your right. There isn’t much traffic.

Tim does, and doesn’t speak again until he’s found a comfortable pace and position that seems to keep him from smashing into anyone.

John directs, corrects, and lets him ponder.

“So here’s what I’m thinking,” Tim finally says. “If all this is real, then other things must be. So. Are there good fairies, or something? Wishing wells? Forest spirits of mercy, or kindness, or whatever?”

There’s a pause.

Tim… I don’t know everything, but I do know this: no. There are no beneficent fairies. No good and kind spirits just waiting to freely give of themselves to undeserving mortals. Everything that exists only does so because it has not been eaten or used by something else, including you - from your immune system to your choices, you also fight to survive. Yes, I believe we will find help, but it will come at a price. It's just a matter of what price you’re willing to pay.

Strangely, this is different from John’s usual calming tone. It’s not crazy-smooth; it’s just quiet, and Tim suddenly feels like this is the first time John has been genuinely gentle with him.

Tim’s throat feels tight. “Bit of a downer, there,” he manages after a minute. “So what do we do?”

You truly don’t feel what he offered was worth what he asked?

“Just being in that building made me feel paranoid, and that isn’t like me. I started to get angry, over, just… nothing. No. Whatever price I have to pay, I’m not losing myself for it. That guy didn’t even have a solution, anyway. Just a what-if. Not worth it.”

Then we keep looking.

“I don’t know where to look, is the problem. And just so you know, John? Maybe I am surviving, like everybody else here, but that doesn’t mean I can’t make choices and be a good person and help other undeserving mortals.”

Seeing yourself as the hero, are you?

Tim snorts. ”No. I’d be a cheerfully bisexual bard, at best, not a protagonist. I just mean… I don’t know. You make every living thing sound like an asshole, and I don’t think all of us are.”

John chuckles. A slutty bard? Really?

“It’s a DND ref- wait. You understood that?”

Yes. I’m familiar with the trope. I’m merely amused you used it.

So that has some implications, holy shit. “How the hell are you familiar with an internet meme?”

Well, two ways. The first is that as long as we share a body, some of your knowledge will sink into me – a little bit like water through porous stone. Not much, but enough to give us some common contextual ground. However, in this case, it’s because not everyone who kept this book was only a cultist. Some of them were nerds.

“What, did they just keep you on the table while scrolling through I Can Haz Cheezburger?”

Sometimes.

This doesn’t feel like the full truth. There’s something else John is not saying here, but Tim doesn’t know how to get at it. “I can talk to you in memes,” he says instead.” I’m going to be insufferable.”

John chuckles.

Or… maybe that was the truth, and Tim just feels paranoid thanks to whatever the hell that place was. “How does anyone even manage to work there without all becoming axe murderers?” he mutters.

I believe if you are inclined toward the type of fear and information-gathering that god prefers, it grants some sanity so you can keep feeding it. I’ve seen the like.

“A whole fear-god economy. Fuck me, that’s wild.”

Indeed.

“And by the way - what was all that ‘mine’ stuff about?”

John sighs. I apologize. I… felt strange, in that place. I could feel it feeding on you, and I didn’t know how else to react. I thought perhaps it would respect some kind of… prior claim. Obviously, that didn’t work.

Tim laughs weakly. “Oh, we are definitely not going back to Spooky Manor, then. But where do we go instead?”

I have an idea, if you’re willing to try it - but first, you need to eat. He was right about that. Man shall not live by peanut butter alone.

It is deeply unnerving to hear all these deeply human references, used with such easy familiarity. “I don’t want to try dealing with a restaurant. Find me a take-out place.”

Keep going. I’ll get you there.

It’s going to be okay, Tim tells himself on repeat. It’s going to be okay.

Though a tiny part of him is beginning to wonder if, somehow, his family might be cursed.

[zahri-melitor]

Wait, Jason Bard had a backup series running? Like by himself? I thought he was just a bum who showed up for a couple storylines every few years I didn't realize he was a solo character

I need to actually read more of his pre-Crisis stuff to give you a 100% answer on this, but yes, Jason Bard had occasional back-ups in 'Tec and appeared across the various Bat titles through the 70s on a regular basis. He was dating Barbara for a hot minute in there too during pre-Crisis - their breakup had to do with her getting elected to Congress.

Post-Crisis his story is tidied up somewhat. His background gets reworked in Batgirl: Year One; he pops back up in stories working for his own detective agency with links to Larry Lance's (Dinah's dad); he's in and out of Birds of Prey on occasion, and works with Tim occasionally. Basically, he's a useful private eye who ISN'T Slam Bradley.

I quite like him. He's a peripheral Barbara character, at heart, and he's a useful cop-adjacent detective to farm things out to.