#yes i ship him with like eight different people

[rboooks]

If you take requests can you do a dc x dp with dead tired ship?

I love requests~! I really hope I got dead tired, ship, right. I need to find out the ship names. It's Tim/Danny, right? If not, let me know, and I'll fix you another one.

Tim really wasn't looking forward to meeting the new heir to Vladco. Usually, his parents didn't want anything to do with new money, as they thought that new money was too close to no money, but Vlad Masters was different.

The difference? He bought out almost all of Drake Industries' shares, and now Tim honestly thinks he owns more of the family company than his parents. Jack and Janet hoped to make good connections with the man and slowly but surely trick him into selling the shares back to the Drakes.

Tim thought if he was smart enough to get the people that bought shares of his family company generations ago, not just once but at least eight times, then Vlad Masters wouldn't be as easy to trick as they thought.

Then again, his parents aren't the best businessmen around. If they were, they wouldn't be flying through the family wealth, leading them to bankruptcy.

Tim would know.

One day, he looked at their books when he was bored a few months after discovering Batman's identity. He tried to tell his mom about it, but she told him that he didn't understand the business well enough to tell.

So he signed himself into college-level business courses online to learn it. She didn't appreciate his initiative.

"Remember, Tim, Daniel Masters is who you must befriend," Janet says for the third time as they climb out of their car. " Friendships are the ladders to climbing up in the world."

"Yes, Mom." He tries to smile at her, but all Tim wants to do is go back to the roofs of Gotham and watch the Bats.

Jason is supposed to start his solo patrols tonight, which is a big deal, and he's missing it. His parents weren't supposed to be back for another month. However, their latest job was canceled due to locals complaining.

His dad grumbled about people getting in the way of history, but Tim thinks it has more to do with his parents wanting to dig up an old cemetery......apparently the locals like their grandparent's resting place to be left alone.

Tim also thinks it's not lovely to dig there just because the locals are poor, so he may have hacked into the country's files and flooded the internet with the disrespectful attempt that his parents were trying to make. It received the right amount of backlash to stop the whole operation.

He then sent the community an anonymous donation so they could fix it up, get the gravestones washed, and the stories of the buried people turned into a book. It's the least he could do.

Tim's parents didn't realize the loss of funds only because he carefully hid his tracks with shell companies.

They are greeted at the door by Vlad Masters. He gives his father a handshake, compliments his mother's dress, and even offers Tim a gentle hello. Masters is known for being a bit of a humble hermit, soft-spoken but with sharp, intelligent eyes.

Everything he expects new money to be, down to his mannerism and even the way he stands. Tim would have been able to clock him miles away without even knowing his name.

"This is my son, Daniel," Masters says, patting the head of a frowning boy Tim's age. He stands just a bit away from Masters as if he does not want to be near him. Tim notes the way he shies away from Master's hand.

Interesting.

"It's Danny." The boy hisses. Mom's face tightens at his manners. She never liked children being heard instead of seen. Danny takes a small breath before smiling at the Drakes with a friendlier composure.

The hostility was only toward his father?

"Please call me Danny. It's my real name, not a nickname," He says, offering his hand for a shake. Tim fights a wince. As the son of a wealthy family and not the head, Danny is not supposed to initiate a greeting with Tim's dad.

He just told the Drakes he needs to be aware of high society rules, making him easy pickings. His parents jump onto that weakness like a lion on a trap gazelle.

"Daniel. It's lovely to meet you. " Mom's articulation is just a shade away from being mocking. Danny's smile falls off his face closing down into a near-emotionless mask. "How old are you, deary?"

"I'm old enough to still hear correctly, unlike you. That's not my name. It's Danny." He says much to mom's surprise. Tim guesses she's not used to people challenging her so directly. He learned that, too, while he was running Gotham.

The elites always made passive-aggressive backhanded comments to insult each other. The poor told you to fuck off to your face.

"You do not speak that way to my wife, Daniel-" His Dad starts, but Danny holds up his hand.

"You either call me Danny or don't talk to me." He says. "I don't need to waste my breath repeating myself."

Wow. Tim thinks, watching the red growing on Dad's face. He's cool.

"Are you going to let him talk to me like that?" Dad demands, turning to an amuse-looking Masters. The other man raises a brow, his gentle smile still on his face, but somehow it looks more....dismissive now. As if he was looking at a child demanding the impossible.

"Why ever do you mean?" Masters asks, "Your tone implies you were insulted, but that would mean you are upset with a child asking to be spoken to with respect. Surely, a man of your standing knows children deserve respect?"

"They need to respect their elders." Mom cuts in her voice like ice.

"He is my son, so I am his elder. Not you." Master counters, "But not to worry, I will remedy this issue. Danny will no longer be speaking to you disrespectfully, as I will not allow him to be near you."

His parents had a few seconds of looking smug until Masters waved his hand back towards the driveway. "Have a lovely night, Mr. and Mrs. Drake."

"Excuse me?" Mom cries, and Tim can't believe his eyes. The rest of the wealthy guests have caught on to the issue and have gathered near the windows and doorway to watch.

"That's Fruitloop for You can leave now." Danny chirps starting to look more like his father by the amusement on his face. "Except for him. He's cool."

He points to Tim, who flushes at the attention. He had been staring at Danny, taking in every detail of his expression and body language, fascinated by the fact he did not once seem intimidated. He didn't even look bored.

He seemed comfortable in his slightly slouched posture and confident in his skin and abilities. But his earlier behavior implied that just as he is confident in himself, he also doesn't think very highly of himself.

Tim's never seen anyone like that. It's strange. New. Exciting.

Heck, it was exhilarating.

Tim wanted to break Danny Masters' head open and figure everything about him out. It felt like a new case just begging him to uncover.

"I am?" He asks in a slight daze, and the other boy offers him a dazzling smile.

"Yeah, you respect the dead. The spirits adore you."

What?

"Oh, this is the young boy who protected that cemetery in Guatemala?" Masters asks with genuine warmth this time. "A fine job, Timithoy."

"It's Tim." He hears himself say, and Masters nods.

"A fine job Tim."

Danny offers him a wink, and Tim thinks his stomach just fell out of his body. What is this-?

"Timothy, we are leaving!" His mother screeches, tugging on his arm and yanking him away. The rest of the guests laugh as the Drakes are driven away. Tim knows he will never be allowed near Danny after this, so he turns his head around to give the boy one last look.

He meets the glowing green eyes of the Masters, who wave their fingers at him.

Tim starts following Danny around after that.

(Danny and Vlad know he's there and think it's cute. That's how ghost courts, so they don't see it as a problem. What is problem is getting along long enough for them to figure out a way back to their home dimension. Danny allowed Vlad to overshadow people just so they could have the means to eat, but he's getting really sick of Gotham. At least the soft clicking sound of a camera lures him to sleep at night.

Tim approaches Robin before his hero can go to Ethiopia. He doesn't understand what he is experiencing as his first crush and concludes that the Masters are aliens planning on luring small children by making them fall under a spell through their glowing eyes. Jason takes this very seriously and agrees to wait on his mission overseas. He realizes early on what's actually happening but, by that point, thinks Tim is hilarious and just edges him on.

He, too, thinks the Masters are aliens, but he's not about to tell Bruce.)

[beauty-and-passion]

TBOB PART 3: OF BILL'S SOLITUDE AND BILLFORD (1/3)

What can I say? I’ve always loved the canon ship in almost every fandom I was in.

Welcome, everyone. Welcome to the third part of my endless rambling about Bill Cipher, The Book of Bill and Gravity Falls in general. Now it’s time for the ship, so sit back and relax, because there is a lot to talk about here.

Yes, I was one of the people who shipped these two eight years ago. And I shipped them as soon as I finished watching the series, because… well, there was more than enough proof that something was going on between them.

Unfortunately, the mentality at the time was “Bill tries to kill Dipper as soon as he has the chance? True love. One trillion proofs that Ford and Bill have something going on? How dare you think that, you are a Bad Person™”.

And yes, I know I could’ve written one post years ago and tried to explain Billford back then but… it would’ve been so, so tiresome. Especially considering that pedophilia was a-okay, but Billford shippers were terrible people Because Yes.

But hey, times change, people change and TBOB gives us enough proofs even a blind person can see them. So. it’s finally time to extensively talk about this ship - this time, from Bill’s point of view.

(For the disclaimer and everything else, refer to the first post. And read the previous ones too, if you like! They will help you understand some things I take for granted here.)

<- Previoust post - Masterlist

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Billford has always been canon

The thing is: now as then, Billford has never been a ship about “and they ended up happily ever after”. There was never an intent to glorify abuse or to say that Bill and Ford had the healthiest relationship and everyone should have the same.

What was so captivating of this ship was the tragedy of it. The clearly evident infatuation. The obsession these two had for each other.

This is what pushed people (me included) to ship them: because it’s interesting. The dramatic possibilities, the angst, how deeply an obsession can go to the point you lose yourself to your partner… and yes, of course also the interesting images that can come up by imagining such different beings having something physical (if you’re not a coward and give Bill a human form). It’s not the typical fluff with a couple being lovey-dovey 24/7: it’s a lot more. There is a lot that can be explored. It’s wonderfully challenging, both on the writing plane and purely mentally.

… and yes, it's funny for crack and parodies. These two being cringe and pathetic or married and divorced at the same time is always funny.

Sure, at first we had just the show to support this ship. But oh boy, if there weren’t enough proofs already:

Ford’s house was filled to the brim with images, pictures and stuff of Bill. His goddamn windows are triangular-shaped. Not even the Vatican is filled with so many images of God - and I can assure you the windows are not Jesus-shaped.

Ford made a deal with Bill to be together “from now until the end of time”. Until the end of time. That’s basically a marriage, only even more extreme, because fuck death, we will be together until the last supernova evaporates. And before you ask: yes, it takes such a stupidly long amount of time, it’s bonkers. That’s real infatuation.

Ford consensually gave his body to Bill for possession. Just imagine the sheer trust you need to surrender your whole self to someone else. Not even a married couple can reach this level of trust. And definitely not “just friends”. Maybe BDSM couples can come a bit closer to what these two had.

As soon as Ford returned home after 30 years, Bill greeted him in a dream, called him “his old pal” and was all nice and friendly. No hard feelings, no reprimands, nothing but flattery and threats because, as we learned from TBOB, these two things go together in his head.

Bill asked Ford to join him 200 times more or less.

Bill gave Ford 200 nicknames more or less.

During Weirdmageddon, right after Ford tried to kill him with one of the things that could’ve destroyed him (the quantum destabilizer), Bill welcomed him with a smile, offered him a place among his freaks for the umpteenth time and, when Ford refused again, he turned him into his literal golden trophy wife and carried him around.

By comparison, when Preston Northwest offered his help, Bill shuffled the function of every hole in his face and ignored him completely right after.

Also: Ford tries to shoot me and fails by sheer luck? Please please please, be one of my freaks. Dipper tries to throw me a punch that will literally do nothing? Death. Bill doesn’t have double standards, nope nope.

To convince Ford to give him the equation, Bill’s first thought is to bring Ford into a private suite, serenade him and ask him to join him for… what? The 220th time?

When Ford refuses, Bill puts chains on him in the kinkiest possible way known to mankind, with an iconic image that screams of BDSM.

Somehow, all of this wasn’t enough. And so, we had Journal 3, in which:

Ford called Bill “his Muse”. Oh, my mistake: he called Bill “his blessed Muse”.

Literally lavishes Bill with compliments. So. Many. Compliments.

Says Bill will “seduce” you with never-ending flattery. Interesting verb choice here, Ford, are you sure there’s nothing else you want to tell us?

Ford named a constellation after his Muse.

Once he went through the portal, instead of hiding away forever and good luck finding him, Ford held a 30-years-old grudge and decided HE would’ve killed Bill, no one else. That’s not a simple obsession between friends.

But after all of this, something was still missing.

Until now, it was quite certain that Ford had a COLOSSAL obsession about Bill. The religious fervor, the sheer trust, the depth of his grudge all made it very clear that Bill carved a deeply rooted place in his heart and mind - a place he kept for most of Ford’s life.

But what about Bill? Did he even care about Ford?

We had no idea. Sure, he showed some kind of care: he gave Ford special treatment during Weirdmageddon and seemed to value him enough to offer him a place among his freaks multiple times.

But when did this care start? Was it just because he needed Ford? What about their pre-betrayal relationship? Did Bill even care before?

The most plausible explanation at the time was that pre-betrayal Bill was simply flattered by Ford’s lavish adoration. Maybe he liked the guy a bit (otherwise, why waste time with him?) and humored him in his fervor, but nothing more than that.

But then the betrayal happened and Ford switched from adoring him to opposing him. He actively ran away, found ways to keep Bill away from his mind and came back with the sole intention of killing him.

At the time, I thought this was the moment when Bill started to be truly interested in Ford. Before Ford was just an adoring pet. Now he was more. Now he was interesting. Now he was worthy.

And that opened the door to even more angst possibilities! If Billford was just a “one-sided relationship” before, now it could’ve been the story of two beings who loved/cared about each other, but at different moments in time: Ford in the past, when Bill didn’t love him yet. And Bill in the present, when Ford wasn’t in love with him anymore. The perfect tragedy, ton of angst, love that.

But now, with TBOB and thisisnotawebsitedotcom, the tragedy that is Billford gets a new, angst layer. A beautiful, angst layer.

Because it’s not that Bill never cared about Ford or cared at the wrong moment in time: Bill cared right from the start.

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Deeply alone

One detail about TBOB that people aren’t talking too much about is the sense of solitude that permeates it. There are parts in which you can literally feel Bill’s loneliness.

One example? The Bill Tells All section. I know it’s supposed to be a funny parody, but it’s also a perfect image of how alone he is. He’s so alone, he has to be host, interviewee and audience at the same time, because no one else is willing to listen or talk to him.

And in light of the information we got about his past, I think this is an extremely important part of Bill’s character and personality.

Let’s come back to Euclydia: the anthem/poem on the website emphasizes how close people are (“LOVED ONES WILL BE EVER NEAR”), so it’s very possible Bill grew up surrounded by his loved ones.

And then, one single event and everyone disappeared. All the people who surrounded him one second ago, were gone the second after. “There was no one left but me, covered in blood, alone in the universe.”: if this line means solitude for us, just imagine how much, much stronger that same solitude would be for someone who, until that moment, has always been surrounded by others and knew no other reality than that.

That’s another level of solitude: it’s a black void of emptiness, something all-encompassing and all-consuming. It’s a hole carved inside you that nothing will fill ever again. And it was you, the one who carved it.

Of course Bill became insane. Of course he chose to find a justification for his action, by saying that he liberated his dimension and that his people were holding him back. I don’t know what he would’ve done, if he hadn’t. Probably, he wouldn’t have found a way to survive.

But he survived. He repressed his trauma, justified it and kept going towards the stars he was aiming for.

Still, that void was inside him - and we know he tried to fill it. He tried by dating a literal void, for god’s sake. And he tried by surrounding himself with people.

That’s probably why he became who he is: a flashy, flamboyant figure, someone who loves to be the center of attention, because that means having people around. It means people listening to him and being with him and surrounding him again. It means not being alone again.

I mean, just look at this book: every page has something new and interesting, every page is a different attempt to keep you involved, to keep you around and listen.

But an audience can always leave. An audience can stop being around. And that’s probably why Bill searched for someone closer, someone who wouldn’t leave him so soon.

He searched for new loved ones.

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Love and hate

Bill’s love advice put a real smile on my face, because sure, they’re funny, but at their foundation, they all share the same goal: to show to your potential partner your qualities and how you would be able to carry/provide for them and your offspring.

Why is it so funny? Because that’s exactly what every single living being does to attract a potential mate: showing off your colorful feathers, singing louder than others, fighting other rivals, showing how clever you are, using pheromones and special smells. And, for humans, something like, idk, showing how wide your hips were as proof that you would carry healthy babies. Or showing off how wealthy you are, to prove you can take care of your partner and your offspring.

Bill himself follows this mentality, considering advices like “have two of everything to show your wealth” or “show how much calcium you have (aka how healthy you are)”. Heck, he even has a seduction hat which is basically one huge phallic shape!

And, again, this makes me smile, not just because it’s a clear parody of those men who keep showing off their huge, large vehicles. But also because he usually wears a tall top hat. And how funny it would be, if a tall top hat was indeed a way to win a partner in Euclydia? What if that’s how his father got his mother? Please, I want a fanfic or Mr. Cipher entering a place with a top hat big and wide enough to win Mrs. Cipher’s heart (while not accidentally piercing through another shape). I bet it would be hilarious.

Funny love advice aside, I would also point out these two things Bill says:

Love and fear are right next to each other in the brain and, like most humans, Bill also can’t tell the difference (he doesn’t even think there is a difference)

“love is the pupa stage for hate”

The fact Bill mixes love and fear explains why he is like that in general - and with Ford too. If love and fear are the same thing, then there is no difference between flattering someone and threatening them. There is no difference between partying with his friends and scaring the shit out of them. There’s no difference between helping Ford and hurting him. And there’s no difference between allowing him to see Fordtramarine and “joking” about someone coming to steal his eyes.

Also: if “love is the pupa stage for hate”, then Ford coming back after 30 years hating him was completely normal for Bill. It was just how things were supposed to go: first he loved him, now he hates him. Still, same thing. Still worth a place among his freaks. Still worth flirting. For Bill, nothing has changed - just evolved in a natural way.

And yes, this is uber duper fucked up and great material for toxic Billford. But it also makes me think: how did Bill get this mentality? How did he manage to mix love and fear so much? When did it happen?

Inevitably, I think about Euclydia. And inevitably, I think that “the incident” is when Bill mixed the two things.

When he still lived in Euclydia, Bill clearly experienced both love and hate: his mother at least seemed to love him, the other kids didn’t. Bill doesn’t like his optometrist either and we have no clue about his feelings towards his father. Later in his life, Bill recognizes his family and his world tried to blind him/”snuff out his potential” - so, again, something more similar to hate than love.

Then, Bill destroyed his place. He had to deal with a trauma so huge (i.e. experiencing solitude for the first time in his existence), it left a void inside him. A void he decided to suffocate with lies - lies that, in the end, are just half-truths. His place was bad and his family was holding him back! But that was also the place that showed him love for the first time. His people were flat minds in a flat world with flat dreams! But among them, there was also the one who loved him right from the start.

I believe this is when the two feelings got mixed in his brain. In his attempt to justify and cope with his mixed feelings regarding the universe he just destroyed, Bill ended up mixing love and fear together and believing that love is just one stage of hate. Unable to deal with the vastity of solitude, Bill put together justifications for his actions and messed up his own perception of feelings.

The result is someone who is deeply, deeply alone and who desperately keeps searching for love to fill that void… but is unable to do that, because he cannot distinguish between love and hate anymore.

That’s why he has a lot of exes. And that’s why they’re all exes.

But hey, at least there are friends, right? Right?

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Bill’s friends are full of potential (especially one of them)

The perfect friend for Bill should be:

alone, outcasted, rejected by society, possibly an orphan looking for a purpose in life (so exactly like him)

completely devoted to him

Which you can see by yourself that this isn’t exactly how a friendship should work. The friend exactly like you can still work, but the friend completely devoted to you who should do everything you want… well, that’s not a friend. That’s not even a pet, because even pets do not follow you around with such lavish adoration.

But somehow, in the vastity of the Multiverse, Bill managed to find some friends. And oh boy, what friends:

Pyronica is a beauty queen AND she has a twin sister AND she dated Hectorgon. Cool, but not enough. I need details. But, like, a lot. Her entire story would suffice (maybe).

Amorphous Shape is invisible to most of the Henchmaniacs. How? Why? Who is she, really? Where is she from? Where is her backstory? Why isn’t it here? I need it here.

Hectorgon was a goddamn sheriff and Bill just throws it like that?! I want his backstory too! I want to know everything about him!

Keyhole hates Pyronica? Why? What happened? Where is all the juicy gossip, Bill? We need the gossip!

And most importantly: a certain someone was part of Bill’s gang. Someone with a photo that has been covered, but it’s still partially visible. And as soon as I saw it, I jumped up on my bed and asked: “Wait… is this Jheselbraum?!”

The answer is yes and thisisnotawebsite confirmed it: she was one of Bill’s Henchmaniacs. And now the right question is: how much do you want The Book of Jheselbraum, from 1 to 10?

I mean:

In the partially crossed-out part about her in TBOB, Bill says she figured something related to dimensions

In the shaman page (TBOB) there is a code: WHICH HENCHMANIAC RATTED ME OUT

In Journal 3, Ford has been saved by her, who sucked him out of the 2D world of Exwhylia

Jheselbraum told Ford that Bill’s “thirst for power caused him to destroy his home dimension - including his parents and everyone else he’d ever known” (Journal 3)

Still in Journal 3, Ford says she spoke of Bill “without anger, but with a calm, steely, clinical resolve to see his reign of terror end”.

In addition to that, let me add this part from thisisnotawebsitedotcom under the code TANTRUM:

I KNOW YOUR CRIMES, CIPHER. TAKING A NEW HOME WILL NOT MAKE UP FOR THE ONE YOU’VE LOST. WHAT YOU DID TO THE COUNTLESS SOULS OF EUCLYDIA- Cipher stopped in his tracks. YOU CHOOSE YOUR WORDS VERY. CAREFULLY. Ciphers henchmen murmured amongst each other, confused. They seemed to have heard conflicting stories about Bill’s past. “You said you liberated the people of your dimension-” LIBERATED THEM FROM THEIR BODIES! DONT LISTEN TO HIM! HE’S A BABY!

Can you see how HUGE the potential is?

What I believe for now is that:

Jheselbraum figured out what Bill really did to his home dimension (i.e. destroying everything and not “liberating” it, as he said to his Henchmaniacs)

She started to actively find ways to stop him from doing the same thing again

She “ratted him out” with Bill’s new potential puppets on Earth

Bill found out she didn’t just rat him out, but found out the truth about Euclydia too and that’s what led to her escaping

She settled closer to a 2D world - maybe to learn more about Bill, maybe because she knew Ford would’ve appeared there

And speaking of that, we have the message on thisisnotawebsitedotcom under the code SEVENEYES:

This is something someone else wrote to her. Someone who told her to escape to a crossed-out Dimension (who guesses that the crossed-out thing was the number 52?). Someone who told her it was against the rules, but it was also the only way to escape him (aka Bill).

And from her code, you can find out the other criminals found new homes as well.

In other words, we have a hidden spy story, in which someone helped Jheselbraum escape from Bill and, in turn, she helped all others escape Bill.

If you don’t want a book about her, about her story as Bill’s henchmaniac and about this whole thing, you are a huge. Fucking. Liar.

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And with that, let’s close part 1 of this umpteenth endless analysis. The next one will come soon and it will be all about Billford.

Yes, I know I already talked about Billford here, but we still haven’t talked about the details in TBOB and Bill’s perspective on it. Also, it’s always nice to talk about Billford.

See you soon~

-> Next post

(How about a coffee? ☕)

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[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Kaz and Wylan’s potential to become each other

Wow, you guys were a lot more excited about this than I was expecting! I made a post briefly mentioning this idea and it got way more attention that I was expecting, so as promised here is my explanation and I’ve tagged people who asked for it at the end :)

*WARNING: CONSTANT SPOILERS AHEAD*

Ok so the driving forcing of this comparison is rooted in the similarities of their characters and their backstories. Both of them lost a close family member, were abused by men with power over them, and experienced a form of ‘rebirth’ by nearly drowning in the Ketterdam canals. They also both experience disability; Kaz using a cane for a broken leg that didn’t heal correctly, and Wylan having severe dyslexia that prevented him from learning to read. A key difference that separates them, and arguably is a representation of the difference in the way their experiences have shaped their personalities as well, is that Kaz’s disability is a direct result of his chasing after vengeance, whereas Wylan’s disability was used as an excuse for his father to abuse him for what we as the reader see to be a minimum of eight years. (I’m assuming this because he is 16 in the book and was 8 when his mother ‘died’, which is the point that he describes he father to have “given up on him”)

I’m gonna quickly hop to parallels between Kaz and Pekka Rollins, bare with me I promise it’s relevant, which are quickly established as a key part of the novels. When Inej compares them, Kaz’s reply is “I don’t sell girls, I don’t con helpless kids out of their money” to which she gently responds “look at the floor of the Crow Club, Kaz”. Aside from this being the heartbreaking line that it is, it also does a very good job of highlighting their similarities and a similarity that they share with Jan Van Eck. When they meet the merch at the end of the first book they meet on an island called Vellgeluk, which is described as being popular with smugglers and slavers like those who kidnapped Inej. The other Crows are surprised Van Eck knows about Vellgeluk, but Kaz simply says “maybe he isn’t the upstanding merch he appears to be”. Great subtle foreshadowing for his double cross, and great establishment of the link between these three characters. In fact, Van Eck and Kaz echo each other more than you might think. Just as Kaz states “Greed bows to me, it is my servant and my lever”, Van Eck says “Yes, Chaos will come. And I will be it’s master”. In their first meeting, Van Eck accuses Kaz of murder and gambling with people’s lives, and in return Kaz points out that 1 in 5 of Van Eck’s ships will never return because they will sink or “fall prey to pirates”, so they are both doing the same thing, and that they both have the same motivations for this bloodshed: “profit”.

Now consider how often Wylan echoes Kaz, and therefore whether he echoes his father as well. They both have exceptional memories, Kaz’s being photographic/eidetic and Wylan being able to put words to music in his head to remember pages worth of infomation - this is even emphasised by Kaz being able to count cards when he gambles, saying “he could keep track of the game for up to three decks” and Jesper asking Wylan if he’d be able to apply “that trick to counting cards” to which he replies “probably. But I won’t”. They also both have impressive intellects, which could have placed them far higher up in the world than they’ve found themselves if it weren’t for cruel circumstances - Van Eck even comments on this, saying it angers him that Kaz has so much potential but does nothing with it. Then there’s their tendency to avoid being vulnerable. I think we too often overlook the fact that no-one knows Jan Van Eck hired two men to kill his son, not even Jesper, and that not even Inej knows what happened to Kaz on the Reaper’s Barge. Jesper believes that Wylan left his house as a result of his father’s abuse but that it was still his choice, and Inej has no information beyond “Pekka Rollins killed my brother” and the explanation of the con when Kaz faces off with Rollins in Crooked Kingdom. I genuinely believe that the biggest thing separating them is where they place blame for their situations. Kaz blames Pekka Rollins. Wylan actually blames himself.

Arguably, although he catalysed the events, if Rollins hadn’t conned Kaz and Jordie they still would have suffered in an almost identical way: they would both contract the Queen’s Lady Plague, they wouldn’t have enough money for both medicine and boarding, and Jordie would die. In that scenario Kaz would have still been left penniless and alone with nowhere to go, but he wouldn’t have had anyone to blame. In fact, he may have died as well because it’s really his drive for vengeance that makes him strive for survival. When he’s on the Reaper’s Barge he wonders if it’s worth trying to survive because there’s nothing waiting for him in the city, but then he realises that the chance of revenge is waiting for him, and that thought drives him to stay alive every day that follows. Without Rollins, Kaz probably would have blamed himself for Jordie’s death, and I’m backing that up with the singular moment when he’s first attacked by parem-high tide makers and has a brief “boy’s fear” that they are ghosts. He thinks, for a split second, that a ghost has come to kill him and what does he say? He says “Jordie had come for vengeance at last”. This is chapter three. We have no idea who Jordie is. With the limited information we had at the time and what we’d just seen happen to Big Bolliger, I assumed it was someone in Kaz’s gang that he had backstabbed and who has died because of what he did. But no. This single line leads me to wholeheartedly believe that Kaz blames Rollins, who realistically was only a small part of his suffering, quite so vividly to emotionally avoid blaming himself.

Wylan blames himself until around chapters 14 to 16 of Crooked Kingdom. His experiences with mental, emotional, and physical abuse have actively convinced him that his so-called ‘inadequacies’ caused a change in his father’s behaviour. But Wylan not being able to read didn’t magically turn Van Eck from a lucky family man into someone willing to try “specialists, tonics, beatings, [and] hypnotism” against his child. The fact is that Van Eck, like many abusers, is masterfully manipulative in everything he does. Wylan describes seeing his parents’ marriage as a happy one, but he also says “the argued all the time, sometimes about me. But I remember them laughing a lot too”. He’s quick to defend their relationship as if it isn’t supposed to be marred by argument and he lays blame on himself by suggesting that he was the root of their unhappiness. He also says that around Alys, Jan Van Eck becomes who he once was around Marya; a kinder, gentler man. I don’t think we’re meant to assume that he’s acting any differently with Alys in private right now, but I do think we’re meant to assume that he would have done down the line if he hadn’t been arrested (and presumably she filed for divorce). In chapter 14 of Crooked Kingdom, Wylan learns that his mother is still alive but that his father had her committed and declared insane so he could use it as grounds for divorce and marry Alys instead. And you know what happens? Wylan blames himself. He says, verbatim, to Jesper: “You don’t understand. It’s my fault”. He explains that Van Eck did this so he could have a “real heir”; because Marya produced a “faulty” child he needed a new woman to give him the child he wanted. That’s a messed up thing to think on so many levels, but Wylan doesn’t blame Van Eck because he is still being conditioned by his abuse. He and Kaz experienced different kinds of abuse, and Kaz wasn’t conditioned to blame anyone but his abuser, so that’s what he does. When Wylan does begin to blame Van Eck, he is immediately taken in by this same idea of revenge. Kaz says “you were angry. I needed you righteous” when explaining why he sent Wylan to St Hilde blind in chapter 16. Wylan was angry with his father before, but he wasn’t actively seeking vengeance. Now that he has a cause, someone other than himself to fight for? He tells Kaz “well, now you have me”.

Both of them have this potential to be fuelled by revenge or self-hatred, and although they go about it in different ways and lean towards different sides of the scale they are both balancing between those two extremes for the entire duology. Their past experiences have, and their future experiences could, tip them further either way but right now they are almost playing with the line.

Thank you so much if you’ve bothered to read this far, sorry for the long post but you did ask for an essay, so there you go. Tagging the people who asked - @kazooyay @mikasimaginairyworld @sunseeking-cyptid @moonlit-aura @alexplutoplanet @gandalfsmallnaturals @livsarthaven @goodomenstrack23 @origami-butterfly @flower-biatch @bookworm010307 @thesunniest @wherela @space-ace-thoughts @sixofbabycrows @antisocial-burrito

Sorry if I missed anyone!!!

[stardancerluv]

A Space Journey

Part Two

Summary: New developments for Tyler. Reader and Tyler

Notes/Warnings: Mentions of fights in Tyler’s past. Esteem issues with Reader. Company induced angst with Tyler. Drinking. (Be safe and responsibly)

Runs long. It’s been writing itself. Ooh, he so deserved better.

❤️s, feedback, comments & reblogs are welcome!

Tyler, stood outside of the office. Opening and closing his hands, unease prickled him. The rain was particularly heavy today and he was more then happy to be out of it. He couldn’t imagine what they would want. He just had a very good salvage. They should be happy.

“Harrison, get in here.”

Turning sharply on his heal he went into the office. He bit the inside of his cheek when he saw a high ranking military officer and someone from the science office.

“You wanted to see me sir.” He kept his eye level straight. Just past the balding, company man that sat behind the desk and directed to to his salvages.

“Yes, Harrison. We’ve noticed you.”

The seat creaked as he sat back.

He felt his heart pick up speed.

“Me sir?”

The man nodded. “One of our bigger cargo ships has gone missing. It’s beacon recently came back online but no one is answering any of the coms we sent.”

The man gave an indifferent shrug.

“Perhaps, space pirates took it, raided it and killed the crew; we can’t be sure. But we want you to go and look into it.”

“When sir?”

“Fifteen days, Harrison.”

“If I may, depending on where it is why not send me now and perhaps I’ll come back faster then planned like with the Omega 17 salvage I just came back from.”

For a moment, a smug expression fell over his face. The pay day and his efficiency was superb. But he caught himself, and went back to a blank expression.

The man behind the desk chuckled.

“Told you guys, my boy is motivated.” The glanced at the two other men. “And he’s good. My best.” He gave him a smile. It made his stomach churn.

The military man stepped forward. “We believe, this time you will encounter hostiles.”

He pressed his lips together.

“Alright. I’ve never dealt with hostiles or anyone for that matter.”

“What about the few fights that led to a late night, dawn in one of the 4 by 10 rooms?” The man’s razor thin mouth cracked into a smirk that spread across his face.

This was beginning to sound like something he may not walk away from. He felt ill.

“Easy. You will get some training. You don’t get it, it doesn’t sink in before we need to ship out; we replace you.

“Hey, you said it would be my man we’re using.” The man behind the desk genuinely rankled.

Tyler never would have guessed that he cared one way or another.

The military officer shrugged. “My men will give you a rundown on how to handle yourself.”

“What about my crew?”

“Honestly? We are well aware of how important your family is to you, they can stay on the Corbelan IV, your cousin doesn’t need any help from us. Or we can give you a different crew.”

The man’s tone was as flat and as unforgiving as he looked.

“We don’t care as long as you accomplish what we want you for.”

“How’s the payout?”

The man behind the desk let out a chuckle. The military officer glanced down at him and back to him.

“If it all works out you will be able refit uthe Corbelan IV with the repairs its been needing and more.”

“Alright done.”

“Go to quadrant twenty seven at eight hundred hours tomorrow.”

********

Tyler, moved through throngs of people. Another miserable day in Jackson. His mind was a jumble. Did be really say yes?

“Baby want a good time?” Hand reached out, he grimaced and shook his head barely stopping.

He had to get out here. You all did. Damn, you had never even see anything else.

He was grateful, when he got to the Corbelan no one was there. He needed some time to think.

He plopped down in one of the chairs. It barely gave under his weight. But it would have to do. Looking out of the shuttered smudged window, he saw more dark clouds had rolled in bringing more rain.

He raked his fingers through his hair. He could do this. If he felt strong enough he’d bring the others along. How would he even explain using another crew.

He smirked to himself, at the idea of making some solid credit. They had wanted him. His eyes moved over the small sitting space. Grungy, cramped. Far too small. He rested a boot on the table.

Two small hands that had rough softness covered his eyes. A broad smile curled his lips.

“Guess who?”

He chuckled, tilting his head to one side. “My annoying sister.”

A peel of laughter came from above him.

“Guess again?“

“Oh! Oh! I know Navarro.”

“No!!!” You slipped to the side of him, hand on your hip.

“I knew it was you.”

He chuckled but as he looked you up and down, a smirk curled his lips. Damn. Even in your faded, torn company shirt and cargo pants you looked good.

“Looking good baby.”

You shrugged. “May I?“ Your eyes fell to his lap and back up to his eyes.

“Please.” He smirked pushing against the chair, it was unforgiving. So he could happily make room for you in his lap.

You easily made yourself comfortable. It relaxed him after what he had just gone through, good or bad. It had filled him with unease filled confidence if that was even possibly.

You wiggled more and then giggled.

“Tyler? Are you off world?”

Another giggle came from you.

His attention coming back to he rose an eyebrow as he saw you giving him a playfully serious look from under the shield of his cap. You were far too cute sometimes.

“Just the meeting I had.”

He made a face, mentally shrugging the feel off. He looked at you, cocking an eyebrow.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice.”

“What? Oh this?” You playfully placed your hands on his cap.

He motioned for it. “Give it back.”

“Nah, its comfy. I like it.”

He made a swipe for it. You avoided his hand and squealed.

Wrapping his arms around you he held you close. Easily snatched it off your head, pulled it onto his.

You were beginning to protest, when he dipped close and pressed his lips against. He felt a soft push before he felt you melt against him.

*******

Eyeing your reflection in the scrapped, mirror. You frowned. Even though the rain had let up and you all could walk to the bar with just ash and soot hanging in the air, your hair fell flat.

You had never been one to use taming spray. But it just looked so boring and dull. You had wanted to look good for Tyler.

Kay came bouncing up behind and gave you a tight embrace. You could smell the soft scent of the drinks she had been enjoying. She endearingly, pressed her head against yours.

“What’s the matter? Is my brother being insufferable?” Her eyes met yours in the mirror.

“No.” Your shoulders slumped. You patted her arms. “He’s great. I just don’t think I’m enough.”

She pulled back and turned you to face her. “What is this?” Her eyes were sharp with concern. “He adores you. I’ve never seen him so happy.” She chuckled. “So full of himself. He’s like I got the best so I am the best.” She smiled.

“Truly.”

“Yeah. I’ve never seen him so confident.” She looked playful. “If I didn’t like you so much, I would have pushed him out of the Corbelan long time ago.”

You smiled then. “If you say so.”

“I do.” She offered an arm. “Now, let’s get back out there! We have to get a few more dances in and have a few more drinks.” She gigglee.

“Yes!”

******

“One more.” He gave you a wink, taking the glass. “You gotta finish yours too.” His gestured to yours.

“Oh! I almost forgot.” You hopped onto the stool beside him, grabbing your own glass.

You glanced over at the small very jammed dance floor Kay was shimmying with some random blonde guy you once or twice saw in your sector of the mine. You had lost track of where Bjorn and Navarro were.

You looked back at Tyler in time to see him bringing the glass to his lips. In the hazy, warmth the drinks you had distantly made you jealous of the glass. Looking him over, you noticed how sweat prickled his dark strands, his cheeks were flushed and how he tilted his head back as easily drank the entirety of the glass.

A loud sigh came from him, slamming the glass down he wiped his mouth the back of his hand. “Ready?”

You nodded, happily taking his hand.

His hands were firm, as he held you to him. You fingers grazed through the shorter strands of where he shorn some of his hair. It was a wonderful contrast to the longer, soft strands.

You giggled softly as he leaned in close, his lips grazing your throat. He nipped at you. It made you wiggle against him.

“Man, I want you.” His voice rasped in your ear.

Moving just so. Loving how his scent enveloped the two of you. It pushed away the others or even the place.

“I will always be yours.” You whispered in his ear.

He pulled you even closer to him.

******

He rubbed his temples under the water beating down at him. He really shouldn’t have drank that much last night.

But then again, it was the night before the company owned more of him. He was doing this for you and the others. He had to keep telling himself this.

******

He swished the water and the paste in his mouth after scrubbing at his teeth. Might as well not look and smell like he had danced and drank the night away.

Going into the kitchen, he opened one of the containers and snatched up two blocks of the corn bread. Sighing, he munched on one. By the time he came back to his room. He placed the one he grabbed for you by the environment gauge and time giver.

Carefully, he pulled on his long sleeved, thermal shirt leaving the buttons undone, always felt strangled otherwise and then he pulled on a pair of his heavier socks. He looked back at you. He had wanted to tell you, more then he even wanted to tell Kay or Bjorn but right now, he couldn’t he had to get the feel of things.

A soft sound came from you, still asleep as you moved and settled onto your back. You had snagged one of his shirts. Seeing you in it, made him smile.

Looking away, he reached out and pulled over his boots. Another soft sound came from you. Maybe he should leave a note, but you and the others knew how sometimes he would leave early if he had a good lead on a new salvage. But this was different. He chewed the inside of his cheek.

“Tyler?” Your voice was soft, still heavy with sleep and he felt your hand on his back.

He put on a brave face, a winning smile

“Hi sleepy.”

“You are already leaving?”

He nodded. “Got to.”

“Ok.” He felt your hand leave his back. He shuffled a bit to face you more.

You looked back at him.

“Look you trust me right?”

You nodded.

“Good.” He chuckled softly. “Look I got some good things ahead. I promise.”

You pressed your lips together. “Good. Just be safe.”

“Me? Always.” He pointed at his table. “Look, I even nabbed your favorite. The corner of the corn bread.”

You smiled then. “Thank you.”

“Nothing but the best, I can give.”

You moved fast and hugged him tight. You tucked in under his chin.

“Baby?“ He without hesitation hugged you back.

“Had a nightmare.”

He squeezed you. “Nothing will get me.”

He felt as you nodded.

“Now you are one that’s gotta to be safe in the mine today.” He rubbed your back. “Take a tablet before you head out, to clear your head. I’ll get us some good rations for tonight.”

*******

A few hours in, sweat was running down his face. He rubbed his forehead with his arm. They prodded him, pricked him to draw his blood. Now, he was hooked up to something and he was running on some kind of device; it beeped in time with the beat of his heart. He could not wait to get back to you and the others.

[drawnfamiliarfaces]

As someone who has always loved siblings dynamics in fiction, I find it funny that almost every single member of the HoM team has siblings. Kim has two little brothers, Danny has an older sister, Jake has a little sister, Jenny has eight robot sisters, June has an older and a younger brother, Rex has an older brother, and Zak has three cryptid siblings. Ben and Randy are the only ones who are technically only children but Ben still at least has a cousin who he has a sibling dynamic with. I don't think Randy had anyone like that. (Although it's one of the few shows here that I didn't watch so feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.) Any way, now Only Child Cunningham is being treated like the little brother by all of these experienced siblings and has no clue what to do and I find that funny.

(P.s. sorry about the long comment. This thought wouldn't leave me alone so I thought i should share it)

(P.p.s I love your HoM au and your art. Thank you for sharing it!)

Please, don't be sorry, this is like, one of my favorite asks about HoMies I ever got! And also thank you for your kind words! <3<3<3

I also adore sibling dynamics in fiction! It's one of the main reasons I don't want to put much focus on ships in this AU, like I mentioned before, there would be like one canon couple with one of HoMies, but otherwise everyone are sort of floating in nebulous single area, so I could focus better on their complicated friendships with a dash of found family/siblings dynamics!

(And your ask reminded me of a fanart I did a long time ago about Randy being the only child in Secret Trio. xD same brain anon!)

Also one can argue that Howard, Randy's best friend, could be considered sort of like a brother to him (they became friends at a very young age), but I personally view them more as Bros. (does it make sense, lol?)

But even if we count Howard, their dynamic would be more equal in older-younger sibling scale, while Randy indeed would be mostly treated as a younger sibling amongst HoMies and it would probably drive him insane!

Being the youngest and newest in their friend circle, he is like a new baby brother or a co-worker/young kohai (ye, cringe wording but terminology vibe aint wrong! xD) that others are prepared to protect and help, impart their wisdom on, but also tease! (and perhaps learn something from him in return! )

But Randy Only Child Cunningham, as an already seasoned, if a bit overconfident, hero would hate (just a little bit) being considered as less experienced (even if he technically is) than others, no matter how much he absolutely adores being in presence of all those cool people! At times it would feel condescending, but in reality others just want to support him the more they learn about how he came to be the Ninja.

After all they know what it felt like being that young, having that responsibility trust upon your shoulders and going through so much. Especially considering that among them, Randy perhaps had the least stable support during his hero-ing career. Sure, all of them had to go through some things alone, but there were family and friends that were there to help when it came to it. And, no offense to Howard, who does sometimes manages to get through for Randy, he is not the best at being the type of support Randy needs at times. And, Ninjanomicon? While incredibly useful for teaching moral lessons and art of being Ninja - is not exactly the most er, physically able in supporting Randy at time of crisis, being an inanimate object and all that, lol.

So yes, Randy-Only Child-Lone Ninja Hero-Cunningham sometimes doesn't know what to do with all those people who appeared in his life and treat him like a little bro! But sometimes, he enjoys it. ;)

(a little bit of random rambling beneath, feel free to ignore! haha)

Also random, and its not very obvious at all, but there is slightest differences amongst HoMies on how they view/regard him and behave with/around him, depending on their own experiences:

Kim and Jake, as older siblings through and through, tend to see him as a younger bro, like their own siblings who can be a handful and overzealous little hellions at times.

Danny, Rex, Jenny and Zak are a bit complicated. They all have siblings that are older than them, but they are also kind of younger in some sense (or in Danny's case an adopted younger sibling).

Danny and Rex would tend to be overprotective a little bit, as people who didnt have a younger sibling before (I mean, Danny does but she is so independant! Danny doesnt get to exercise his overprotectiveness on Danielle xD) so its a bit new to them. But they are also kind of dicks, and thats just the younger siblings in them talking, lol.

Jenny and Zak on the other hand, both have siblings that are very confusing from the age bracket view.

All ofJenny's siblings are older than her BUT their prototype AI and bodies make them behave younger than her, so she tends to view them as younger siblings. There is a constant argument amongst them about who is older-younger, but its all in good fun! (She also sometimes misses being the only child. xD)

Zak's siblings are all cryptids, and two of them are older than him in age (Fisk and Zon are definitily full grown and possibly more long-lived than humans, I still have questions about Komodo, but he is probably older than Zak in age just by a little bit), but their behaviour, as.... well, i don't want to say animals, because they are not mindless animals, but let's just say - their disregard to human behaviours and norms, as cryptids, make them behave in a way that could be considered irresponsible, thus making Zak often behave like a responsible older sibling, despite being younger than them.

So, Jenny and Zak tend to be as snooty and in 'charge' as an older sibling would, but also be mischevous little shits that is younger (sorta only) child behaviour.

Ben and Jun are sort of like the previous four, but they tend to view Randy on a more equal footing rather than just vacilate between older-younger types of behaviour.

Ben, is a single child, but he grew up pretty close to Gwen, since they were born on the same day. Sort of growing up twins but not kinda situation. They also have an older cousin/brother Ken, and they both adore him, but it is obvious that primarly those two grew up together and are equally annoyed with that, lol.

Jun is a middle child. (I kind of dont want to say anything else, because i feel like it explains everything. xD but-) She is independant, and is equally exasparated with her snooty older brother and her hellion of a younger brother. So, really, she just tends to be the most normal towards Randy in the end???

so, ye, of course in the end they treat him as just a new friend, this was just more of me trying to look into inner mind of sibling dynamics in a weird way haha

sorry about it, but if you got this far, hope you had an entertaining read! ;D

[mah-t-wordblog]

Spidering

Lee: Muichiro Tokito

Ler: Genya Shinazugawa

🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡

Ships: Genya x Muichiro

Warnings: This is a tickle fic, if you don’t like it, just scroll down

This fanfic is originally in Portuguese, my English is translated using an automatic translator, if there are any big errors you can tell me so I can fix them

🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡

Muichiro sat on the floor and looked at the wall

Genya looked at him and seemed confused “what are you looking at?”

“Ah… there’s a little creature over there, I forgot its name”

“Over there?” Genya looked and tried to see, it was very small but he had good eyes, it was a small spider “it’s just a spider, are you afraid?”

“Afraid? Why would I be afraid?”

“Some people are afraid, I don’t know” Genya shrugged

“What do spiders do?”

“You don’t remember?”

Muichiro used to forget basic things sometimes, it was normal for him

“Nop”

“They produce webs and… they have eight legs…”

“Eight? Wow, that’s a lot of legs” Muichiro said looking really surprised

“Yes” Genya smiled, having an idea in mind “spiders climb walls in a different way, did you know?”

“Really? How?”

“Let me show you, give me your hand”

Muichiro gave his arm, Genya stretched it out and placed his hand on top

“They go up like this” he said walking with his fingers, Genya saw that Muichiro clearly felt a shiver “and when they go up there do you know what they do?”

“Whahat?”

“Tickle you!” Genya let go of Muichiro’s arm and used both hands to squeeze the boy’s ribs

“Yohohou lihihihiehehed!”

“Of course not, Muichiro, are you doubting me?”

“Gehehenyaha!”

Genya quickly put his hands under Muichiro’s loose clothes, before he could react, tickling his belly

“NOHOHOHO! GEHENYAHAHAHA”

“I’m sorry, but you were so cute asking questions, I couldn’t resist”

The Hashira kicked the other, making him let go

Genya covered his mouth and laughed a little

“I lihike spihiders, Genya”

“I like you”

“Huh?”

“Nothing” the swordsman turned red

Muichiro laughed, messing up his hair

🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡💜🖤🧡

Tickletober babiesssss 💛💛

[suffarustuffaru]

i need to share my very horrible idea to combine the reinhard/julius/otto/subaru boy drama into one julius-centric fic

ok so a little while ago ive made all kinds of ottojuli and reinjuli posts and while i havent finished all my major julisuba posts Yet i am quite fond of julisuba also and i think itd be incredibly funny if you just dumped all of these ships into one story. just go ALL IN on that boy drama!!!! go big or go home amirite!!!! the worlds WORST love trapezoid youve ever seen!!!!

this post is just me rambling fic ideas bc i sadly dont have time for Every Fic Idea and also i just. i just think itd be funny putting multiple ships with the same person in them into one fic. on a serious level its like mimicking real life relationships where sometimes people come and go and you have different dynamics with each person!! on another level i just think this is also very funny so!! here we go. under the cut:

anyway so my idea for this is that you know, julius of course meets reinhard when hes ten and reinhard is eight and then it alters julius's brain chemistry. at first he's in complete awe of reinhard. and then over time the shame starts setting in. that julius isnt as strong as reinhard. and the jealousy sets in a bit too, so julius's got this chip in his shoulder trying to carry his family's legacy and trying to carry the weight of knighthood to be as perfect as possible. to be as close to reinhard as he can. they meet again in their teens and julius shows reinhard the ropes of like basic knight stuff bc reinhard just joined the knights. and of course reinjuli become friends but julius has spent his whole life quietly watching reinhard from afar and now julius still has that distance with reinhard even as theyre supposedly friends now. reinhard is a God, you know? his powers and his leash from the kingdom and his family keep him distant and the two of them are ignoring that. classic homoerotic "do i want him or want to be him" friendship where both of you are too scared to get any closer for various reasons with a Twist (reinhard's very real monster complex that keeps getting validated bc Everyone Around Him thinks hes a monster).

anyway but then julius remembers that you know, shit between reinhard and him wont work out for many reasons, like reinhards family deciding to torment julius at various points in his life (heinkel, whos julius's boss, and reid, who went from julius's childhood idol to. you know.), and also reinhard needs to have kids because hes the sword saint, and also homophobia exists in rezero. and also even if those werent all obstacles julius still has his Complexes connected to reinhard and they got that distance between them so. no go. (repression gets in the way of relationships :((( )

also quick side note is that ex 4 happens and julius reinhard ferris go to vollachia and julius interrupts a meeting with vincent vollachia himself to go "I UNDERSTOOD THAT LITERARY REFERENCE YOU JUST MADE. THATS A REALLY GOOD REFERENCE I LIKED IT A LOT" bc hes a massive nerd and ig this is slightly-more-of-a-disaster-gay julius au so julius is like ............................. vincent was kinda cool for that.

AND THEN SUBARU CRASHES INTO JULIUS'S LIFE and julius is like seeing this guy who's also got a chip in his shoulder and then he insults the knights and says the knights are all depending on their dads (nepotism) and julius is like .......the chip in my shoulder was bad enough and also youre kinda like me fr. and you are clearly a fucking misguided kid so now i have to save your ass. i cant NOT save your ass. and reinhards like "julius and subaru nooo you dont have to do this :((((" and julius cant admit atm that hes also doing this to save subarus life so julius is just like "he disrespected the knights >:(((("

but yes we all know what happened there. julius saves subarus life. julius has to slice subarus throat in that one failed loop. they become friends across several timelines. they also homoerotically share souls, you know, typical bromance things, rivals to lovers except subarus the one going YOURE MY RIVAL and julius is like he is SUCH an upstart. hes really grown on me like a fungus but thats the appeal. and julius i think sees subaru as like a kindred spirit (or at least thats how i interpret julisuba) except subaru is like way more freer than julius is. same desire to prove yourself but subarus not restraining himself constantly like julius. its sometimes to the point of recklessness and general stupidity and what have you, but his boldness and bravery and determination and heart really is admirable.........................

yeah so anyway julius falls for ANOTHER guy again, you know how it is sometimes. the heart wants what it wants and julius is cursed to always have the worst meetings with his closest friends. and of course julius gets heartbroken bc wtf i have to kill my new friend :((( noo!!!! but in the finished loop its like. oh subaru...... hes really improved himself. hes grown so much already. hes kind of. inspirational really. idk how he does it. except subarus you know got that Mystery to him the same way reinhard does (theyre traumatized and Cant Take About It Normally so they just randomly lore drop what they can) and also subarus SUPER into emilia. and julius is like .................... well. subarus taken. haha. and reinhards. taken. fuck me. fuck. and like somethings going on with subaru and rem and emilia right. fuck. and subarus got his whole toxic masculinity / gender crisis..... and he doesnt know hes Bisexual yet...... man. what a loss for julius amirite haha.

and also subarus busy after arc 3........... and julius has no idea whats happening there but that seems Real serious :(( and julius's got other things to attend to so he hopes subaru reaches out to him eventually..... or that they cross paths again since subarus in the emilia camp and julius is in ana camp (and of course reinhard is in felt camp and like that was a whole debacle bc wtf. reinhard, u do know thatd be a big deal to our mutual friend felix?). so. julius pines from afar ONCE AGAIN HAHA.

(also of course subarus still attracted to reinhard here. its um. well julisuba can bond now over pining over reinhard but thats for later also!!)

anyway of course during arc 3 julius briefly runs into some gray haired merchant twink thats being dragged around by subaru bc ana camp rescued this guy from a cave somewhere??? and this new guy and subaru made a deal or whatever so he was just helping out in the background of the fight against sloth??

and whaddya know................ julius goes to drink at a bar bc you know he probably tastes wine for fun in his free time (hes definitely Fond of wine anyway iirc) and now hes Sad over the Ones That Got Away so. bar it is. and gray haired merchant twink is there!! no way. they start talking a bit casually while drinking you know and julius's taste is Unfortunately either the graceful ones (anastasia, because julius has great taste in women) or the cringe fail ones (all the twinks - except for felix - that julius keeps having the wildest first meetings with, because julius has slightly shit taste in men) so julius is like huh this otto guys kinda funny lol. endearing in a weird way!! and -

oops they both end up being a little. they make a little bit of a move on each other. bc they were drinking and got a Bit tipsy. ottos Also not over the one that got away (subaru) (again) and hey. the finest knight truly is. Fine. objectively fine. totally. so you know. things get a little out of hand, maybe they do a bit of cringe fail flirting hidden underneath five million layers of repression and the Horrors of Being Known but ultimately they both embarrass themselves somehow (read: how far they went with each other while under the influence is up to you) and agree to Never Speak of This Again bc oopsies they were both technically each other's first time being Straightforwardly Not Straight with another man. oops. anyway julius has to go back to his camp and otto fucking bolts but he bolts right into subaru and gets his ass dragged into sanctuary drama.

julius is totally not a little bit envious about that.................... about otto getting to accompany subaru to sanctuary... but dont worry julius!! youll get to make up for it later!! bc eventually arc 5 stuff happens. and julius is Glad to see reinhard and subaru again. even with all the Baggage. and subaru is of course Weird about julius but eventually subaru reassures julius after they both confide in each other about the astrea drama (theyre honorary astreas via being dragged into the astrea family mess). and subarus reassuring to julius in a whole new way okay. subaru, whos unrestrained and incapable of being on the down low about anything, and julius, whos always holding himself back with a gazillion layers of repression, starts learning to let go a bit...

but also juliotto meet again. its terribly awkward and they both agreed to never speak of their awkward encounters again. subaru is going ??? and reinhard is clueless. otto then also goes to save reinhard and felt from heinkel trying to take felt hostage, which was also terribly awkward but reinhard and felt are grateful about it (but lbr if reinhard and otto knew each other deeper reinhard would maybe be a little. Apprehensive. around otto while otto would be sympathetic with reinhard bc hes like male emilia). but then while otto manages not to get erased by gluttony....... julius gets erased. of course. which you know results in being forgotten by reinhard in julius's THIRD first meeting ever with reinhard. and subarus the only one who remembers him of course.

then arc 6 happens :,))))) and julius of course has to confront his ideas of knighthood, his identity, his self esteem, and who he is outside of His Name. and also julius gets his ass beat by reid. his childhood idol. who reinhard KNEW was a shitty person but never ever told julius (whether this is because reinhard wanted to spare julius's hero worship or because reinhard never got the chance to tell julius is hard to say lajdsf). but julius does get to triumphantly win in the end!! grow as a person!!! learn to undo a bit of that repression and not hold himself to impossible standards all the time!! hes growing still!!! hes finally solidified his friendships with people like subaru and emilia!! hes remaking his relationship with anastasia!! hes asserted himself, hes planning on going to meet reinhard again one day and duel him!! things are looking up even if its still bittersweet that he doesnt have his name back yet!! does this mean?? perhaps?? a HAPPY ENDING?? julius can have the two men (reinhard and subaru) he admires the most in his life?????? as friends???? or as boyfriends?????? slowburn mutual pining????????????????????????????????????????

and then comes. arc 8 otto. that piece of shit.

julius is very much someone who has to grapple with the weight of the expectations that people throw at him. and also reinhard is someone who May envy julius a bit, but there's also you know, joshua and subaru with the Explicit Envy and (past) resentment because theyre placing heavy expectations on julius!! theyre pointing blame at julius!! julius is trying to find himself outside of stuff like that, especially after arc 6, but he's still got stuff to work on you know? he still has duties to fulfill!! loyalty that he has to act on bc hes gotta help subaru and co in arc 8!! and then in comes otto.

otto is also someone with expectation placed on him, but its Different. ottos mostly a nobody and when hes Not a nobody, his reputation tends to be Derogatory. hes a menace. hes a bad luck charm. hes grappling with the fact that he has to keep being left behind - post-arc 5 bc he was injured, but also repeatedly during arcs 7 and 8 because hes too physically weak to be on the same playing field as emilia or garfiel or subaru on the battlefield. he feels Useless after placing his identity on the expectation that hes Dependable and Useful.

julius is a bit more on even ground with otto now that julius is. also mostly a nobody bc his name is still gone. and also julius had to deal with having that part of his identity crushed. julius tried to be useful over and over in arc 6 only to get his ass repeatedly curb stomped by reid in the beginning. he was a nobody. he wasnt dependable anymore. and also otto is that one guy he had a Passing Fling with over having The Ones Who Got Away and julius was still vaguely hopeful about maybe being pals at least but ottos brushed him off a bit since arc 5. theyre like each others secrets you know? and now otto doesnt know that shit - julius is the only one who Knows - and otto also hates julius's fucking guts now. over SUBARU. and julius has been through this whole rodeo clown circus with arc 3 subaru so this is an absolutely terrible ride through memory lane.

and this is julius's THIRD twink that hates him for terribly unfair reasons. julius is very tired and a bit heartbroken in this au trying to pretend it doesnt bother him. on one level it doesnt. bc ottos pathetic and clearly Overcompensating for Something. on another level it kinda does bc julius had a Thing going with otto. and otto is the complete opposite of julius. like hes different from the other guys julius has liked.

julisuba is about complimentary opposites - they appear Extremely Different at first glance but theyre very similar. theyre people who try to look and act bigger than they are, people who keep reaching to be The Best, to be Perfect, because theyre overcompensating. theyre worried their entire identity is only built off of trying to be bigger than the shadow that other people in their lives (like their families) cast. but they cant reach perfection. and julius is like subaru but if subaru tried to really make himself "refined" - if he tried to stop putting his heart on his sleeve all the time. reinsuba are very similar too. theyre very refined knights who try to keep themselves in check at all times while the weight of the world is on their shoulders. they cant have a hair out of place. except julius is like the "smaller" version of reinhard. julius is less powerful. its like comparing a human and a "god" - reinhard, whos untouchable. but its a double edged sword, because julius gets to be a normal person, because half the expectation placed on him is also purely from himself, while reinhard isnt. reinhard isnt Free. hes on a leash by the kingdom and his family. julius even gets his kind of "celebrity" status stolen from him via the loss of his name. hes truly kind of Normal now - julius is like if reinhard didnt have his crazy abilities and had a little more of a chance to be free.

otto? yeah otto is. very very far from all of that. hes so obviously imperfect that most of his reputation, when its brought up, is just him being known as a mess who's caused various forms of chaos everywhere he goes. either that or hes just. There. Invisible. very very average. and otto is someone who wants a nice comfortable life, someone who wants to fit in - julius and subaru arent Exactly like that, and while reinhard also wants to be normal, ottos the one who has more of an opportunity. but he doesnt. because otto Dooms Himself by being recklessly cutthroat. otto is like if subaru was just. More of an asshole, so ottojuli would just be a rather Extreme Challenge for julius to have to deal with HAH. and normally otto is someone who repays how people treat him - a very "you treat me like this, i'll treat you the same way in turn" kind of deal, except ottos developed a vendetta against julius and its basically like if subaru never let go of his arc 3 julius vendetta.

yes so anyway. etc etc stuff probably happens but i ran out of ideas lajdlfjasdf i just think combining ALL the boy drama and recontextualizing + adding to canon would be. batshit crazy. and terribly entertaining. im so sorry julius but i want to see you crack a bit under the pressure. reinjuli as a ship is like tragic gay yearning that never goes anywhere past being friends with quiet homoerotic tension, then julisuba is. you know. extreme rivals to lovers, starts out Rough but then ends up being super super sweet and theyre Trying their best underneath the self esteem issues. and then ottojuli is. toxic yaoi at its finest (pun intended). you get Every flavor of mlm possible!!

ok so you may be asking "ok what would you even name this fic then" and to that i say that this would be called To All the Boys I've Loved Before.

anyway i really wanna write this idea someday ill inform you guys (if youre reading this and are Interested) if it ever happens :< so. in conclusion this is just julius the entire time throughout all of these events:

[respectthepetty]

Naughty Babe, who is Le Ling?!

I watched the Naughty Babe finale and had no idea who Le Ling was; therefore, I have to be annoyingly cringe about it, but before I begin, let me just say that Max looked delicious the entire eight episodes.

But also, this Daddy did too! And I'm not talking about Aon. No! Yi's father has been looking like an entire five-course meal every single time he appeared on the screen. This is the type of father that if your partner was acting up, forget about effing the friends. EFF THE DADDY! Sir, why are you looking so scrumdiliumcious? Is it all that money? Or is it the power? Perhaps it's you in red. Rawr!

Hand over heart, this entire family could get it. Mom included.

I gotta focus! The kids were in the playroom planning shenanigans.

This is a boy who gets it. I've always loved that his name is Syn because he sins but prays about it. Repents while he is doing it but still does it. Makes his sinful peeps pray too for good measure. We're not going to hell on his watch!

Lian not stopping Diao is funny because all throughout Cutie Pie, Yi would call Lian and be like, "your boy's at the club, but I'm only here to collect my man who I have 24-hour surveillance on, so sucks to be your trusting ass, but I'm built different, so I hope you get to your man on time before some serious shit goes down. Toodles!" These two are the pettiest friends, and I love my ghost ship.

POPPY! Where were you all season?! Hopefully filming Love Puzzle, so I can see you kiss a homie, but I was glad to see the secretaries in love and as chaotic as ever . . . in red.

Look at that face! That is a man trying to get all these heathens into the next life, YET THEY WON'T WORK WITH HIM! I guess the honeymoon will be in hell, Nuer!

This dog looked adorable, in red. So glad Domundi switched it out from the Cutie Pie dog. A+ casting choice.

This boat showing up was unnecessary! Was this supposed to be a rainbow moment because a high speed boat thingy coming out of nowhere was not the move?!

This blue color was even depressing Diao out. Get some yellow or orange back on my boy's body, NOW!

Look how vibrant that red ring box looked! LOOK AT IT! The ring looked really pretty with that red watch Diao was sporting too.

Red and white rose petals? They wasn't even married yet. Save them for the actual ceremony. Wasting expensive confetti. And the kissing too. Didn't have sex all this time, now they can't stop. Geesh!

I know this is tied into Chinese tradition and Yi's family being Chinese, but YI IS A RED RASCAL!

And leading up to this wedding, there had been so much blue to represent Diao's family being the hindrance to their love, and now this entire wedding was red to represent Yi and his family and Diao becoming a part of his family, and

Y'ALL CAN'T TELL ME NOTHING!

Then to have the gold dragons which represent Yi's family but are also Diao's color.

Y'ALL CAN'T TELL ME SHIT!

I'm in heaven. I do not care what the plot was. I do not care about the fake amnesia. I do not care about how the dog attack turned into a tiger attack. NO ME IMPORTA! Diao called out his father in front of all those rich ass people and God while wearing his man's color, and I'm living for it!

Kuea is a Red Rascal too, and I appreciated this public service announcement.

Diao sucked his thumb (😑), then they fucked, yet my color demon eyes only saw red candles. Thank you, props department!

Makorn asking if Diao wants a new husband (yes, sir. YOU!) while Yi wore red with that product placement red drink . . . *Mwah!* This blue table cloth gotta go though!

Red over Diao's heart, but that damn blue is still there! Diao, where is your yellow and orange, my man?! DONDE?! Oh yeah, they have kids with little rainbow toys. Good for them.

Hold on, was I supposed to remember this little girl? Diao was talking about her like I should know her. Who dafuq Le Ling?

Even this baby was confused. Who is this chick? Girl, for reals, who is you?! This feels like Buffy the Vampire Slayer's fifth season when Dawn was introduced. Like I KNOW I ain't seen this chica before.

Well . . . she's part of the family now, so good for her.

All in all, YI IS A RED RASCAL, and marriage equality will come to Thailand no later than 2026.

And same-sex partners will legally be able to adopt by 2029.

Naughty Babe, Cutie Pie, and Domundi said it with their full chest, and Apollo is gonna cosign it with his bouncy red ball because Red Rascals may not like each other, but they love to cause havoc when least expected, so . . . fuck it up, sis!

Amen.

[thedepthsoffandomminds]

The guest pt 15

Masterlist

"Drop me off up the road a little! I need to buy some items.". Elle called out to the carriage driver.

" No, you don't. You're going to the hospital to see your paramour." Fanny giggled.

" I am not. I do not have one." Belle shook her head.

"Then why do you spend so much time there?" Fanny asks, screwing up her nose.

"y/n however..." belle turned her eyes on you

"I think it's terribly exciting." Fanny claps her hands together.

"It is a little." You agree.

"I have come to realise that Sneed may not be quite what I thought, but it's no matter. in the next few days, a ship will arrive with a man on it." Fanny announced gleefully.

" Yes, not uncommon in a harbour town, where men outnumber us eight to one." Belle laughed.

"One man in particular. He's with the Bank of Great Britain, and by all reports, someone of outstanding virtue. Mother said she is happy to see me marry, even if it means me going away, and Father said he's prepared to offer a very generous dowry."

Part of you marvelled at how normal these types of conversations seemed to you now.

"He might be a perfect bore." Belle grinned.

"Please. Belle, you're speaking about the man I love." You all snicker,

"If the virtuous man from the Bank of Great Britain kisses you, you will know if he's the one for you. It will feel like nothing else on this earth." Belle says giving you a sideways glance. The two do you get out at the hospital and you make straight for Jack. When he sees you he excuses himself from the patient and comes straight to you, sliding his arms around your waist.

"Good morning." He said giving you a quick kiss."

"Good morning, Doctor." You can't help the giggle that escapes your lips. Jack takes your hand and pulls you into a cupboard, closing the door behind you before he pressed himself against you.

"I missed you." He whispered against your lips.

"I was with you last night." You say as you wrap your fingers around his waistcoat lapels.

"That was too long ago." He spoke between kisses.

"Why don't you stay, tonight?" He asks.

"Jack." You sigh.

"Why?"

"I just...I can't not yet." You say.

The door swings open and you both jump away from each other, Hetty looks down at you.

"There is a patient that needs attention, Doctor" she says, a small grin dancing around her lips.

"Thank you Hetty." Jack said, clearing his throat and walking out. You follow behind sharing a small giggle with the nurse. You see Sneed walking across the corridor his eyes fall on you. Jack already slipping away to his duties.

"Miss y/l/n, it is a pleasure to see you today." He said with a smile.

"Thank you, Doctor. Sorry I won't keep you from your work." You give him a curt nod and go to step away but he catches your arm.

"I would heed caution, y/n. It will not take long for people to notice you spending so much time here and with the unsavoury side of the town. My offer could still stand." He half whispers into your ear.

"Rainsford, you've already proposed to Belle since I last turned you down." You argue back.

"No matter, she has not given me an answer so I may still withdraw the offer." He says confidentally.

"Sneed, please remove your hand from my arm." You say attempting to pull away, his grip only tightened.

"Whatever you think that street urchin can provide you, trust me he cannot. He is penniless. I can buy you houses and horses and jewels."

"I don't want those things. Please let go." You say, panic beginning to rise up in your gut.

"Don't be stupid, y/n. You have two men of fastly different means. I am your best prospect. I am even willing to look past your... indiscretions." He yanked you closer to him.

"Rainsford!" You grit your teeth and tried to pull back once more when you feel his grip slip from you and a body appear between the two of you.

"Don't touch her." Jack held Sneed back against the wall, his fisted in Jack's hands

"Unhand me, Dawkins."

"She is mine! Come close to her again and I'll kill you."

"I don't see a ring." Sneed tried to seem larger than he was whilst still pressed against the wall.

"Mine." He said, giving Sneed an extra shove into the wall before grabbing your hand and walking away.

"Jack. Jack"

He stopped and turned to you.

"Did he hurt you?" He asked feeling your arm where Rainsford had grabbed you.

"I'm alright, Jack." You reassure him with a hand on his chest.

"Dodge, who in God's terrible universe did the Bank of Great bloody Britain decide to send here?" Fagin spoke dragging Jack along with him. You followed along with them.

" How on earth would I know?"Jack pulled his clothes out of his hand.

" Who is the wettest lettuce of all time?" Fagin asked.

" I don't know, but I Was bus.. No."

"Yes."

"No. Please, no."

"Yes."

" No!"

"That's right. Oliver pissing Twist."

"Oliver Twist?" You repeat.

" My goose is cooked. He knows everything about us. And he's so bloody honest. He would see it as his moral duty to send us both to the peelers." Jack panicked.

"Yes." Fagin sighed.

"Did he see you?" You ask.

"No. He was looking in my direction, but I have aged something considerable." Fagin said.

" You've looked the same since you were born. Like a bad piece of taxidermy." Jack growled.

"Hurtful."

You giggle.

"This isn't funny." Jack turned to you.

"It's a little funny. How ridiculous do your lives have to be have the one person arrived here who could ruin everything?" You ask, "look, I'll go back to the house. See what I can find out." You say.

"Wait, wait." Jack pulls you back to him. "I can't do this anymore. You must let me give you this." He pulls the silver band from his pocket.

"Jack."

"No, y/n You have unnerved me more than any other woman I have ever met. You fill me with equal parts joy and dread. Damn you. I can no longer do this without you. let me tether you here." He says eyes begging you.

You hold your hand out to him, letting him slip the silver band onto your ring finger. Jack kissed you hard before you ran off.

*_*_*_*

You reach government house just as Edmund holds a shovel of soil up to Oliver.

"Unsuitable for marrows, more's the pity."

"Oh. Shame." Oliver replies sniffing a pinch of the soil. You walk up to them.

"Ahh, Mr Twist might I introduce my ward of sorts, Miss y/l/n." Edmund gestured towards you. Oliver bowed his head to you.

"An utter pleasure to meet you."

"And you Mr Twist."

Fanny gives her father a pointed look.

"Yes, my daughter here is insisting we have a special dinner for you." He says with a frin that seeps through his wide moustache.

"Marvelous." Oliver grinned, "Yes. Now... I wonder, I believe I saw from my carriage window, an older man in ragged attire that I might have known from London days." Your heart started pounding in your chest and you wondered if the others could see it, "You have no idea... I think his name was Fagin."

" Oh, yes. Him. He works for a surgeon here, a Jack Dawkins." Fanny announced.

"Jack Dawkins is here? I knew him by another name then. I wonder, would it be a terrible imposition to invite Jack to the soirée?" Oliver gleefully clasps his hands together.

"Well, I would hope so, he is my promised." You say holding your left hand up, showing the band around your finger. Fanny squeezed and grabbed your hand.

"Oh this is wonderful news, y/n!" Edmund laughed.

"You and Jack? Oh then the pleasure meeting you is tenfold!" Oliver shakes your hand.

You thank him and follow the others inside.

"So much for he and I." Belle says with an eyebrow raised.

"You said yourself you had no interest in him." You answer sheepishly. Belle took hold of your hand bringing the ring closer to her face and inspected the small yellow stone adorning it.

"It's a beautiful ring. An heirloom?" She asked.

"Oh I'm not sure, it happened a little fast." You took in a deep breath feeling your heart clench.

"What is it?" Belle asked.

"I'm alright. It's just been a long day. I think maybe I should get some rest before the dinner tonight." You say.

"Yes, of course. Let me help you upstairs." Belle takes your arm and walks with you, "I do hope that our friendship can continue after your marriage." She says as you walk up the stairs.

"Belle, I wouldn't have it any other way."

@fandomfan-102 @deanstolemydragon @mydeputyghostwagon

[scienter]

Wind and Truth Chapters 14 & 15

DAY 2

POV: Dalinar, Jasnah, Navani, Fen, Yanagawn, Adolin, Shallan, Szeth, Sigizil, Kaladin, Lift, Renarin, Rlain, Lopen

There are so many POVs in this section! I’m looking forward to this. This is what I love about epic fantasy. So many perspectives.

CHAPTER 14

Epigraph: As I approached the first crossroads, I met a family seeking a new life. – From The Way of Kings, fourth parable

So, why is the Way of The Kings relevant again? Is it because Kaladin becomes the King of Urithiru or King of the Heralds? Or is it related to Dalinar’s journey? (or both?)

How much better would all of this have gone if Dalinar had died in his brother’s place that fateful night? Perhaps this war would already have been won.

NO! No, Dalinar, it wouldn’t. Gavilar was a shit king.

Jasnah liked trying new things; this relationship itself was, in a way, such an experiment. She had enjoyed it for many reasons—the scheming together, the sharing of incredible plans, the chance to connect with someone so intellectually stimulating. Relationships were about compromise, she had read, and so she’d procured a new bed. And she hated it. She swam in stuffing, irritationspren—like pink motes almost invisible in the night—bobbing around her as she listened to Wit breathing. He didn’t snore, but he did occasionally whistle.

I’m not bothered by this ship like so many other people are. It makes sense to me (their relationship is mostly intellectual). But it's not going to last. This entire section screams DOOMED. Wit doesn’t have it in him to go the distance with anyone.

And storms. This was why it was best to avoid such entanglements. Eight days until Dalinar confronted Odium, and she was worrying about a relationship.

I love this about Jasnah. Yes, she’s intellectual, calculating, and cold. But she’s not as stoic as she appears. She cares deeply about the people around her.

What if, instead of hiding her powers, she’d told people what she could do and what she feared?

What powers is Jasnah hiding?

Her life and Dalinar’s seemed very different. He’d burned a city, and people forgave him. He’d proclaimed the Almighty to be dead, and half the ardents had joined him. Yet when Jasnah was honest about her atheism, her thoughts on government, or her displeasure with traditions like the safehand… well, condemnation and judgment had chased her like twin headsmen, each looking to get a whipping in before the execution.

THANK YOU FOR POINTING THIS OUT BRANDON.

Look, I LOVE Dalinar. He’s my second favorite Stormlight character after Kaladin. But I’ll admit Dalinar sometimes gets Draco in Leather Pants treatment.  Both in-verse and from the fandom.

It reminded her of the soft restraints they’d given her when she’d been young. When those who loved her had locked her away for a few terrible months that basically everyone else had forgotten about.

Longer than a mortal mind can track, so I store memories in something called Breath,

I just re-read Warbreaker, and I don’t think anyone in the book used Breathe that way. . .

I’m dying for a Warbreaker sequel btw.

Jasnah turned off her alarms, then pulled a chair over and sank down, feeling sick to her stomach. “I asked you, Wit,” she whispered. “I asked you to involve me in any dealings you had with him.” “I’m telling you now, Jasnah,” he said. “That is, technically, involving you.”

Hoid . . . you’re such a dum-dum sometimes.

She held his eyes and knew. There would never be a place for her inside his deepest self, would there? She’d always be on the outside, maintained as part of his collection. Enjoyed, perhaps even loved, but never confided in.

DOOMED. DOOMED. DOOMED.

“Fantastically wrong. Rayse is a megalomaniac, Jasnah. For all his craftiness, it would hurt him to let me walk away thinking I’d bested him. Yet this time he encouraged it.” Wit leaned forward and took her hand. “He’s grown. After ten thousand years, Rayse has actually learned something. That terrifies me. Because if I can’t anticipate what he will do…”

I wonder who’ll be the one to figure out it’s not Rayse. Renarin, perhaps?

“You’re right,” he said. He took a deep breath. “You’re… you’re right. We need an expert, beyond even my considerable knowledge.” “Do you know any?” “On your world?” he asked. “Only one, but she and I aren’t on speaking terms. I will instead see if I can contact an old friend…”

. . . I guess Hoid and Cultivation aren’t on speaking terms?

I wonder who this old friend he plans on contacting? Another Shard on another world? 🤔

It should be, the Sibling said in her mind. They rarely dared infiltrate me before. My Light not only knocks Fused unconscious, it makes the Radiants here virtually invincible. We need to learn how to send that Light with them, Navani thought back, trailing through the room, resting her fingers on each fabrial she could reach. Spren of a half dozen varieties followed like a cloak made of light. It cannot be done, the Sibling said. Humans cannot hold my Light; they are too full of holes.

Hm. How about the Heralds? They’re cognitive shadows.

Anyway, this is why I doubt Navani will die. I don’t think Brandon would get Towerlight working, just to reverse it in the next book.

No, the Sibling said. You’re part of me, and I am part of you. The tower doesn’t need sleep. You will not either.

Navani doesn’t need sleep anymore? Oh, I’d love that superpower.

She should have asked, but there was so much to learn. She’d discovered only yesterday that she couldn’t leave the tower for any extended period of time, or it would weaken the bond. A few weeks at most was all she could risk.

So, if Navani wants to use her Radiant powers she stuck there. That sucks.

“The queen would like advice from her most brilliant of advisors: Is she too old for quality time with her husband? Perhaps she is too distinguished for an occasional tumble in the surf?” “I wasn’t talking about that,” she replied. “Just the part where we snuck away from the guards and found a hammock. You’re almost seventy, you know.” “And the average age of your merchant council must be somewhere in the eighties,” Kmakl replied. “So by that comparison, we’re basically a new schooner. Now stop distracting me from distracting you.” She sighed, but relaxed into the swaying hammock, the rough canvas rubbing her bare skin. Waves rocked the ship, and her cares fled before warm perfection. Until a brilliant white light lit the cabin. Damnation.

It’s not explicit, but it’s definitely implied that Fen and her husband are having sex. Is this the first sex scene in Brandon’s books? Siri and Susesbron have fade-to-black and post-coital scenes, but I don’t recall any scenes with couples in the middle of the act.

CHAPTER 15

“Hakindar brought me six different soaps,” Adolin said. “And a rough sand mix from Marat to exfoliate! There’s this one soap out of Thaylenah—they use it on their eyebrows—that is fantastic for hair.”

Of course, Adolin is into exfoliation, soaps, and shampoos. It makes sense that Afolin's vanity extends to beauty products.

Also, we got another scene with a nude couple! 😊

I don’t need explicit sex scenes to enjoy epic fantasy, but I’m glad that Bradon's getting more comfortable including physical intimacy in the cosmere.

“I don’t blame you for wanting someone to prep my father for you. He can be… stern to those who disappoint him.” She perhaps sensed the bitterness in his tone, noticed how several joyspren winked away. It had been a year since Adolin had learned Dalinar killed his mother, and he couldn’t let go. As he set Shallan down, she took his face in her hands. “Would it help to talk?” she asked. “I don’t know, Shallan,” he said. “Honestly, I don’t want to think about him. Or talk to him. I don’t want to fix things between us. I just… I…” He’d thought waiting would let the pain fade. It had instead festered. He found himself more angry than he’d been when he’d first found out.

Oh good! Please give us more of this Brandon! One of my disappointments with ROW was the lack of follow-up to Dalinar’s story in Oathbringer. I’m dying to see Adolin confront Dalinar over what he did to Evi. I don't want Adolin to gloss over something SO BIG.

(I don’t think there was enough Dalinar in ROW in general, but that’s a whole other discussion.)

“I know,” she whispered, head to his chest once more. “I want to kiss you until you can’t breathe and spend a week never leaving our rooms. But we can’t. Not yet. Mraize will try to hurt me, love. Prove that I was foolish to cross him. To get to me, he’ll capture or kill you if he can. I have to act before he does.”

Possible Adolin death flag? Or am I so neurotic that one of the main characters is going to die in this book that I’m seeing death flags where there are none?

(I’m convinced SOMEONE major is dying. The question is who?)

She stepped back to him, went up on her toes, and kissed him, water falling around them like applause. The heat he’d been fighting off rose within him, outdoing that of the stream from above, and the passionspren fell more powerfully. It seemed that whether or not she had time to spare, they were going to find it.

Ok, Brandon, can we get a tasteful Dalinar and Navani (implicit) sex scene next? They’re my favorite Stormlight couple.

“It’s not just Azimir and Thaylen City—there’s a third offensive. A large number of Fused are marching on the Shattered Plains.”

Oh shit.

“Dalinar Kholin?” a voice asked. He spun, but found that Colot the guardsman had already stepped between him and the speaker. She was a shorter woman, Makabaki, in brown clothing. Black hair in tight curls, heavyset build. Dark brown eyes that shimmered with something he couldn’t define. “Do I know you?” Dalinar asked. “We’ve met,” she said, then turned and walked along the balcony railing. She waved for him to follow. “You give orders to the king of Urithiru?” Colot said. “What manner of—” “Stay back,” Dalinar said, waving to them all. Then he ran to catch up to the woman. Her air, attitude, and looks dredged up deep memories. Ones he’d once forgotten by her own hand. No. It couldn’t be. Could it? Cultivation. The third god.

THAT’S WHERE YOU’RE ENDING THIS, BRANDON!?

How very Charles Dickens. lol

Maybe Cultivation wants to warn Dalinar about Todium?

[emocka]

For @micheya , I was listening to Lindsey Stirling Carol of the bells for this.

Ok you werent a ghost. You were just a normal person. You had somehow managed to climb tenshukaku. Every night you climbed the building. Facing where liyue was you danced.

You gave several guards a fright, one a literal heart attack.

'There a ghost! I swear I saw it dancing on the outer wall.'

'Ribbons surrounding the ghost!'

'It died during the archon war.'

You rolled your eyes. Seriously all it took was some logic. It was you. You dancing.

Dancing for kazuha, dancing for his safe return.

'Hey, yn!' You looked at yoimiya.

'Yes?' You turned to face her.

'Have you heard the stories?' She asked.

'I've heard.' You smiled. 'I'm the ghost.'

'Quit joking. It's real!' She laughed.

You sighed.

'Ribbons dancing in the wind, ghosts can't carry physical things yoimiya besides' you gestured to the large ribbon on your back, the ones on your wrists.

'So?' She was confused.

'Oh boy.' You sighed one more time before you began to dance.

The ribbons flowed in the wind as your twirled around. She watched as you continued.

'Why do you dance on the building then?' She asked as you stopped.

'Just to bring in good luck for the land. Inazuma needs some luck.' You began. 'With the vision hunt decree inazuma needs it more than ever.'

She nodded raising an eyebrow.

'NOT for kazuha?' She questioned.

'Who him? Nah. Still hate him' there was small blush on your cheeks.

'Riiight' She smirked. 'Come on. I wanna show you a new firework I made.'

You watched as the girl took off running. You did the same catching up to her.

----

You were spotted once more dancing in the moonlight. Two guards watched. You were a silhouette in the moon. One more guard came to watch.

'I wonder why it only dances. How come it doesn't haunt anyone.'

'They say it the ghost of a God who died in the archon war.'

'Really? I wonder what god.'

'Probably God of the moon.'

'Intersting.'

The guards went quiet, watching as you danced more. Suddenly the wind kicked up. The ribbons flowed around you, your hair flowing in the wind. You bowed before disappearing into the night.

----

Well into the distance kazuha stared at the moon. He was sitting on the railings of the boat. In the sleeve of his kimono was a letter. Kazuha pulled out the letter. Glancing around he began to read it.

It was a letter from you. He smiled as he read it. You explained how everyone was doing, skipping over the fighting part, what been going lately, ect ect.

He carefully folded the letter, putting it back in the sleeve of his kimono.

'Dove' He began 'I know it's bad. But you'll be in my arms soon.'

----

You sat at docks watching the ships come and go. Waving at people, greeting kids. You smiled as a cat approached. It jumped on the crate your were sitting on. Stretching it curled up next to you. You began to scratch its head. Turning to face it you sat criss cross giving the cat your full attention. You continued to scratch its head, listening to it purr.

Earlier you had received a letter from kazuha. A captain of a boat had approached you handing a letter out. You took it dropping mora in his hands.

'Hey' you whispered 'is it true you guys have nine lives?'

You giggled at your own question. Really why ask? You just liked the thought. It helped ease your thought on the death of melon, your senior cat.

Suddenly the wind picked up. You winced keeping quiet. All you heard was a small yes. Looking back at the cat it disappeared.

'Oh.' You gave a sad smile.

Hopping off the crate you walked away from the docks unaware of a shadow looking at you.

That night you were dancing. You were on the roof of your own home watching as Sara and her forces head off.

You heard thunder, lightning splitting the sky it eight different directions. The sky got darker. You looked down at the ground spotting someone.

They beckoned you forward. You smiled dropping from the building.

----

'Y/n?' Sara looked at you, but signora took her out.

You were laying on the floor hands tied,eyes closed. You weren't knocked out. You could hear everything around you. You heard the conversation.

You replayed an earlier conversion.

----

'You know why right?' Thw person asked.

'To show why I'm not suffering' you said quietly. 'To clear kazuhas name.'

'Good. In two days I'll becoming by to get you.' The person said.

You nodded.

---

So you set the plan in motion Turing yourself in. The Raiden Shogun wanting to punish you.

Your thought were cut when you heard the traveler voice. The next words out of their mouth made you fear.

Suddenly you felt your self being dragged. It hurt.

The Raiden shogun had dragged you away from the fight.

'You still need to be punished.' She said. 'I can not risk you getting hurt.'

You whimpered at the burning pain. She dropped you on the floor a sense of relief on whatever was burning.

The room started getting colder, you could hear la signora talking, ice shattering, maniacal laughter bouncing off the walls.

Suddenly the room got hot. You heard fire crackling. The floor started getting warmer. You heard a sword clash against something.

Then silence. Footsteps receded towards the traveler and signora. Signora screaming no, screaming about the tsarista. Then silence.

A few minutes later you heard the words.

'I'll allow you to leave tenshukaku.' She said.

Plan in motion.

All you had to do was wait patiently. Yae miko would come get you. Yoy watched as the Raiden shogun disappeared. The door opened quietly. The pink hair kitsune poking her head inside.

'Are you ready?' She asked approaching you quickly. 'Why do you have a rug burn on your back?'

'The almighty shogun' you mumbled. 'Got dragged across the floor becuaee of the traveler and signora fighting. She didn't want me harmed.'

You sat up rubbing your wrists. They were slightly bruised, and sore.

'This plan better work. She going to execute me of it fails.' You said.

'It won't I promise.' She said 'Come. We have a plan to complete.'

You nodded following the kitsune.

-----

'Already? Your cutting it quiet close you know.'

The traveler looked at yae miko behind her was you. You were approaching them holding out something.

'Yae miko? What are they doing here?' The Raiden pointed at you.

'This is y/n. The first vision you took away was them.' Yae miko said. 'But for odd reason their personality remained the same. Even after taking their vision away.'

The two women looked at you. The traveler back on their feet.

You gave yae miko one last look before taking your leave. The trio watched as you disappear.

You were met with the sounds of weapons clashing, soliders from both sides shouting orders, screaming.

You saw blood everywhere. You stopped by one solider. Kneeling next to them you heard their words asking for help as you put pressure on his wound.

'It'll be over. Keep quiet.' You said to him. 'It'll be over soon.'

As the words left your mouth the rain stopped. Lighting ceased. Suddenly you felt a surge of power. One you haven't felt in a year. One that felt refreshing.

'Ah they did it.' Yoy said as a gaint wave came crashing over tenshukaku.

It flooded the area washing away the blood healing the wounded. The solider shoulder healing. You got up walking away as another waved followed repeating the process.

Kazuha looked up as a third wave came over the building.

'This feels familiar' He smiled.

'Its y/n's healing ability' Gorou said as the wave came down.

The water was gentle, warm. The boys looked as a otter made of water approached. You came into view. Looking around you spotted a familiar red orange streak. The owner turned and looked at you.

Everything went silent, as you launched yourself off the stair towards him. Gorou turning around as your lips crashed into kazuha. He wrapped his arms around you. Kazuha accepted the kiss tightening his arms around you waist. You pulled away needing air after a minute.

'Kazuha' you cried.

'Yes dear I'm here.' He said hugging you. 'I'm here.'

-----

'You are a little troublemaker.'kazuha laughed as you explained the nickname. 'Don't climb the building anymore.'

'OK ok.' You giggled.

'So have you decide' He asked.

'I decided long ago.' You replied hoping off the wall. 'I'll go with you where ever the wing leads.'

Kazuha smiled doing the same. You held out your hydro vision as he held up a white laced ribbon. Lacing the ribbon through the vision, he tied it to your neck.

'Y/n. Tell me why you didn't act different when your vision was taken.' He said looking at you.

'Easy. You and dance.' You said.

Kazuha smiled.

'Shall we dance then?' He asked holding his hand out.

'We shall.' You smiled.

The two danced next to the sea as the sun set, the ribbons whipping around them.

[spicechica]

Ernst Robinson x Fem Reader AU Part 2

“Poor girl. I couldn’t imagine a young one like her surviving in a place like this,” their mother whispers. “We supposed she must be from a previous shipwreck. But, I don’t think she has any memory of it,” replied Fritz. You stare out at the half sunken ship in the middle of the sea, feeling as if it’s history repeating itself. You, a young child, barely a teenager, washed up on this island with no memory, no knowledge, and just a large antique chest that had warped from water damage, along with a few pieces of wreckage from the ship that had washed up as well. It was a mystery though how you possibly survived. 

“Now sweetie, how long have you been here?”Their mother asked. “I don’t know…It’s hard to keep count after so long.”, “Well, do you know your age?” You shake your head in response. You knew you must have been around eight when you first washed up on the island, but with no calendar or watch you never really kept track of your age span. From the look of you though, you must have been about fourteen or fifteen, but who knows, you couldn’t even remember your own birthday if you wanted to. 

“They said you needed help…I could help you if you want.” You stutter with your words, still unsure if you should trust these people. “I say you only have a few days before that ship is gone. If you could try to collect supplies, I could help you survive.” “Yes, thank you. Boy’s come with me.” Ernst and Fritz go with their father to the ship to collect supplies while you stay back with their mother and sister. 

After a couple of hours, and a few trips back and forth from the ship, you were able to help them set up a small tent from some old wreckage and a large cloth, also starting up a fire for them to keep warm. It was strange. These people were different then you imagined, they were kind, sweet, and welcoming….a family. You forgot what that was like. 

You sigh and shake your head, you couldn’t get too soft around these people. “Thank you, for helping us today.” Ernst sits next to you, offering you a piece of fruit he collected from the ship earlier. You take the offering, but scoot away a little. “It’s a miracle you survived here for so long. How did you do it?” You stay silent for a moment until you finally respond. “Well, I didn’t do it alone.” Ernst turns his head in confusion. “When I first washed up, I had no memory of where I came from or how I got here. The only clues I had were an old chest engraved with a name, and…this.” You pull out a small gold locket from under your clothes, opening it showing an old baby photo that had slowly faded over the years. 

“I remember I cried that day. I was so young, and so clueless, I knew I wasn’t going to survive a night. In the beginning, I was just eating whatever I could find or reach. I was tired, weak, and always had to sleep on the beach because I was too afraid an animal would eat me.”

“That sounds terrifying,” Ernst said. “It was. Until, I met someone. An island folk. He was tall and dark and carried a spear on his back. I thought he would hurt me, but he didn’t seem to be bothered. He didn’t speak any English either. I remember following him everyday, watching as he caught and killed things for food, watching as he sharpened and mended his knives and spear.”

 “I then tried myself. Practicing everyday how to catch a fish without falling into the water or it slapping me in the face.” You and Ernst both chuckled. “After a while, I was able to adapt to the island and survive. I was able to build my place in the trees and hunt my own food. But soon, the man left, and I haven't seen him since.” 

“So, some mystery man you met one day helped you survive.” You nod in response. Ernst scoffed in disbelief. “I’m just surprised, girls are usually terrified and weak-” Ernst screeches as you begin to squeeze his hand with your strong grip, cutting his circulation. “OW! OW!, Okay, Okay!” Ernst gasps as you let go, watching as the color in his head turns back to normal. “I guess I was wrong.” He chuckled. 

You give him a small smile as you roll your eyes, taking another large chunk from the fruit, the juices running down the sides of your mouth. You didn’t really have any proper table manners.

*Thank you all for the love and support on my last post. I'm thinking of making this into a full fanfiction. If you have any other story ideas or headcanons my inbox is open 😊*

PART 1

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Don’t Go Blindly Into The Dark

Summary:

To hide that he can't read, Jan Van Eck has been forcing his son to pretend he's blind since he was eight years old. Wylan is now attending Ketterdam University, and meeting Jesper Fahey may very well be about to change his life. But is he safe to tell Jesper the truth? And what will Jesper say if he does?

Jesper is struggling to weigh up his life in the Barrel and his life at the University of Ketterdam, and there's a good chance that his growing debt is about to make the decision for him. He hasn't attended class consecutively for months, but maybe that will change when his newest project includes partnering up with Wylan Van Eck. But can he really leave the Barrel behind him? And how long can he keep up the pretence of who he thinks Wylan wants him to be?

Meanwhile there is a darkness growing in Ketterdam, and it seems a killer may be stalking the streets of West Stave. An unknown evil is closing its jaws over the city, and it’s starting to feel like nowhere is safe.

Tags: @justalunaticfangirl @lunarthecorvus @i-need-help-this-is-my-obsession @devoted-people-hater

If anyone else would like to be tagged let me know :)

Content warnings for this chapter: death references, dead bodies, grief

AO3 link

Chapter 60 - Nina

It had been, in the end, the Squaller from West Stave who managed to bring Nina news of Anya. He had a friend who worked in the Geldin District who knew a Grisha indentured to a house on the Geldstraat who knew a Fabrikator at the Hoede house who was indentured alongside an old Squaller called Retvenko, who claimed to know everybody. Considering how long the trail to reach Retvenko had been, Nina was pretty sure that he didn’t know everybody, but she had been willing to let that technicality slide if he knew anything about Anya. In the end, though, it hadn’t mattered that the Fabrikator, Yuri, he’d been called, knew Retvenko because, first of all, Anya had also been indentured at the Hoede house and, second of all, Yuri was dead. 

Nina sat in her room at the White Rose, staring at the message in front of her. In trying to reach Yuri the person that the Squaller on West Stave’s friend knew had only been dismayed to learn of plague outbreaks in the house, and shortly afterwards of Yuri’s death. They’d managed to get in contact with Retvenko - apparently even if he didn’t know everybody he knew enough people to be reached through multiple different routes - who had confirmed the reports of Yuri’s death, informed them that yes, he knew exactly where Anya was, because she had also been indentured at the Hoede house, and refused to comment on the matter any further. It hadn’t taken too much more digging on Nina’s part to learn of the body in a bedraggled red kefta that had washed up in the harbour the other night and been quickly rushed to the bodymen whilst its discovery was hushed up. 

There was no confirmation it was Anya, was there? There was also no confirmation that it wasn’t - and who else could it be? The best possibility was that she was missing; that she’d run from the house in the wake of some kind of disease outbreak and no-one had been able to track her down. The worst was that she was dead; in her attempt to run, maybe having taken a ship out to try and return to Ravka, she had drowned and washed back up into the Ketterdam harbours. 

Nina didn’t want either of them to be true. 

“I can’t tell him,” she’d lamented to Inej, privately cursing herself for the dramatics when nothing had happened to her herself. 

Inej gave her a knowing glance as she shuffled, settling deeper into her cushions. They were perched on her bed at the Slat, leaning against the wall, pillows propped behind their backs so they were almost comfortable. 

“You know it’s worse if you don’t,” 

Nina nodded.

“I know. I will, I just…” she lowered her head into her hands, staring at the fold of her trousers and the edge of Inej’s quilt cover that was visible between her crossed legs. Her palms were cold against her temples, “I want to give him one good thing. Just one. And all I’m going to do is hurt him,”

She thought of the tall, dark-panelled walls of the Van Eck house, the cold of the room in which she’d first met Wylan, as though in defiance of the fire crackling in the hearth. We aren’t supposed to talk. The hour they had spent in fraught silence, the fire and the distant wind their only company, as he sat still and stiff beneath her touch. He’d been, in some ways, different by the day he came to the White Rose. In the obvious ways, yes, he was thinner and frailer and paler, but in smaller ways too. He talked to her, a little, whilst she worked, and he smiled afterwards - for a moment, even if the tears were coming. 

Inej’s hand closed over Nina’s wrist, an unexpected and almost sharp motion. 

“Look at me,”

Nina turned to face her slowly, gaze rising to meet Inej’s. 

“You are not the one hurting him,”

“Inej-”

“You have to tell him,”

She thought of Wylan’s slow smile, of the grip of his hand around the edge of the chair so tight that his knuckles paled. She thought of the blood rushing to his cheeks with any gentle correction she gave him, of the sheer terror in his eyes when he’d woken from his faint in her room. Nina nodded. 

“Yeah,” she whispered, “I know,”

She hadn’t exactly expected it to happen so quickly though; she’d left Inej on the staircase of the Slat and walked downstairs to find Wylan hovering by the door. He’d said barely anything since she came over, in fact for a minute she hadn’t been sure he was listening to her at all as he continued to sit perfectly still, staring at her hand on his, but when she’d done her best to gently explain that the body they’d found in the harbour may or may not have been Anya’s he adjusted his fingers beneath hers, just a little at first but then turning his hand over properly to return her hold. It was only then that she properly acknowledged he wasn’t just staring at their hands, of course, he simply could not see her. 

He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t have to. Nina let herself fall still, focusing on the feeling of Wylan’s hand in hers, locating his pulse and listening to his breathing. A tear fell down his cheek, and then another and another, but he didn’t move to brush them away. After a moment, she dared to whisper: 

“Do you want me to… to lessen it? I can make it feel…” she hesitated. She didn’t want to say better, “different,”

Wylan seemed to consider this for a moment, but then he shook his head. His voice was soft and low when he ventured: 

“I think I need to feel it,”

Nina nodded, then caught herself and instead just gave Wylan’s hand a gentle squeeze; she didn’t think anything needed to be said out loud. She wasn’t sure how much time passed, though it probably wasn’t many minutes, before footsteps began to clack closer to them through the general noises of the Slat and Jesper’s voice moved tentatively through the air. 

“Nina? - Wylan? Are you alright?”

Wylan drew his hand away from Nina’s with a sharp inhale of breath, reaching to wipe his eyes with his shirt cuff as he turned away. 

“What’s going on?”

A beat passed before Wylan, slightly strained and still not turning towards them, managed: 

“Can you-? Please, I can’t- I-”

“Of course,” said Nina, softly, before nodding for Jesper to follow her a few steps away. 

She filled him in briefly, keeping her voice low, glancing back to Wylan over her shoulder with every other word. He’d barely moved a muscle since they stepped away. 

“Did he say anything?” asked Jesper, quietly, watching Wylan. 

“Not much,”

“Alright,” he gave her a sort of half smile, “Thanks. Are you okay?”

Nina opened her mouth, then closed it again, then managed: 

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine,” 

Jesper looked at her for a moment, then nodded and stepped away. 

“Wylan?” 

Wylan didn’t seem to respond. 

“Wylan? Can I take your hand?”

This time he nodded, to which Jesper looked a little relieved, and when Jesper’s hand closed over his he seemed to return the motion. 

“Do you want to go upstairs?” Jesper asked, gently, “We can get some privacy,”

A moment passed before Wylan nodded again, keeping his grip on Jesper’s hand as he stood up. Nina stood and watched them leave in silence. Her chest felt hollow.

[softguarnere]

For Whatever We Lose

Lewis Nixon x OFC (slow burn, enemies to lovers) Chapter Eight: The Same Page

Summary: Sobel had fixed them with a harsh glare when he warned them, “Anyone who does not return at the exact date and time specified will be cut from the paratrooper training program!” A/N: Oh, hi! Is anyone still here? You know, since I haven't updated in *checks notes* four months - yikes This chapter was completed months ago, but I never had time to upload it or edit it because all of my post graduation plans completely fell through and I've been working on starting a new career that's completely different from what I thought I would be doing with my life right now. But I've missed this story and I have a spare second, so I thought I would finally update :) Thanks to anyone who has stuck around <3 Warnings: grief (briefly) Taglist: @kujofam @dcyllom

It simultaneously feels like a few days and endless lifetimes that they’ve been in Toccoa. Not many of them have realized this until Christmas rolls around and they’re told that they will be moving to North Carolina and that they’re allowed to go home for the holidays.

Sobel had fixed them with a harsh glare when he warned them, “Anyone who does not return at the exact date and time specified will be cut from the paratrooper training program!”

He says it with such conviction that Minerva almost doesn’t go home. Not many roads on the Outer Banks are paved, and ferries are used to get between islands. Travel depends on the weather. If it’s finicky, she won’t be able to get back in time. She’ll be cut from the Airborne. And what would everyone say then?

“You’ve got to see your family, though!” Webster exclaims when Minerva reveals that she doesn’t plan on going home one morning at breakfast.

“I want to.” She really, really does. She wants to see Pop’s proud face when he sees the stripes on her uniform, her father to plant a kiss on her forehead, to hug her mother and breathe in her sweet perfume. She’ll even endure her brother’s stupid dog who probably still hasn’t learned to quit yapping twenty-four-seven. “I don’t know how it would work, though. Unless I only stay for a few days and then try to come back early.”

The second the words are out of her mouth, she realizes that it’s not that bad of an idea. Because yes, she loves her family, but they’re not the only ones on the Outer Banks. If she returns home, she’ll have to see the Teach family, and the Beauchamps . . .

“You know what? I will go,” Minerva agrees, which makes Webster smile. “The deadline will just be my excuse to come home early.”

By the time she and Diana meet with the lieutenants that evening, the idea is so set in her mind that she’s able to answer with more confidence when Winters asks if she’ll be going home for Christmas.

“What about you?” She asks, always with the southern niceties.

Winters smiles fondly as he answers. “Yep, I’ll be heading home to Pennsylvania. I want to say goodbye to my parents and family before we get shipped off.” He tilts his head. “What about you, Minerva? Do you have any siblings?”

Across the table, Nixon, who has been brooding into a cup of coffee, suddenly looks up. One of his dark brows quirks in interest, his dark eyes watching Minerva as she attempts to answer.

“A brother. Just the one.”

“Oh, I didn’t know that,” Winters says thoughtfully. “Is he in the service? Or is he younger?”

Minerva bites the inside of her cheek. Describing John-Michael to people who have never met him is hard. Hopefully the lieutenant won’t ask her for details if she gives him the bare minimum, albeit truthful, answer.

“He’s my twin brother, actually,” she replies. “But no, he’s not in the service.” She decides to beat any questions to the punch. “Doctor won’t let him serve.” There.

“How about you, Diana?” Nixon interjects. “Got any siblings?”

Diana’s eyes widen at the direct question. She jumps slightly, the coffee in her cup sloshing a bit. “Three brothers, two sisters,” she answers.

The conversation moves on to other things. But while Minerva sips her coffee, she could swear that she feels Nixon watching her – studying her, even – from across the table.

She refuses to look at him. He can look at her all he wants, regret what he’s missing out on.

Enjoy the view, she thinks as she nods along with something that Winters says. Because it’s all you’ll get.

Diana is too timid to be the bad guy, which means that it’s up to Minerva to issue the ultimatum before the girls leave for the holiday. Which is fine. She’s been the bad guy before, at work, at home – everywhere, according to some people. Later, she’s not even sure what she tells the girls about how crucial it is for them to make it back from Christmas on time, but the familiarity of the job leaves a tight feeling in her chest that doesn’t begin to ebb until the Albemarle Sound comes into view. 

Despite everything that happened last time she was home, the ocean sprawling on either side of her calms her nerves as she travels down the familiar barrier islands. When she was a child, her father used to bring her back books from the mainland when he returned from selling their catch. Ever since he gave her that first book about Greek mythology, she’s always imagined Poseidon lurking somewhere out there in that vast, endless blue, his very breath sending in the waves that lap against the shore, wearing away at them. She’s only been gone a few months, but her eyes recognize every subtle change in the landscape where the water has reshaped the restless ribbons of sand.

If Poseidon were real, he could have stopped the Turkey Shoot, she thinks to herself when the first Lifesaving Station comes into view. But then, she realizes, I wouldn’t have joined up.

It’s the first of many hard truths that she’ll have to contend with now that she’s returned home.

The barking starts when she’s only just in sight of the house. It’s coming from the backyard, as usual. And as always, Minerva pushes a hard sigh through her nose, just like she would when walking home from the school in the afternoons. Shut up, Sparky.

She should have written ahead to warn her family that she was coming, but she didn’t want to get their hopes up. After all, she wasn’t planning on returning until David talked her into it. So it’s not until she’s knocking on the door that anyone except John-Michael’s dog has any clue that she’s back.

The door opens to reveal a tall, dark-skinned man who peers at her from behind large, wire rimmed glasses. His face cycles between shock and confusion before it settles into a well-worn smile.

“What’s up, duck?” He asks.

Minerva can’t contain herself any longer. Trying to suppress the joy that rushes into her heart would be as useless as trying to restrain the ocean itself. She drops her bags and throws herself into her grandfather’s arms.

“Hey, Pop!”

“Who’s at the door?” A woman’s voice asks. Footsteps approach, and Minerva glances up to see her mother, who freezes in her tracks. “Minerva?”

“Minerva?” A man’s voice echoes as her father sticks his head out of a side room and sees her for the first time.

It’s the best kind of chaos, being swept up by her family like this. Realistically, she’s known that she has missed them. But it’s not until they’re showering her with affection that she realizes just how much.

And she’s been so busy trying to become a paratrooper that she hasn’t stopped to think about what she might be missing back home. Time did not stop passing while she was away. If anything, it sounds like it’s been moving faster since she left. Her family has been catching her up on everything she’s missed since she stepped in the door, and they’re well into dessert that night before the list of changes shows any sign of expiring. Minerva has just taken her last bite when the door opens to signal John-Michael’s arrival, which changes the course of the conversation as swiftly as a riptide.

“Minerva!” Her brother’s face lights up when he sees her. Never a hugger – or one for any kind of physical contact, really – he offers her a nod and a bright smile as he takes his usual place beside her at the dinner table. “You’re back!” He tilts his head, smile wavering in confusion and the upmost concern. “Why are you back? Have you been discharged?”

“I’m on leave for Christmas,” she assures him. “They haven’t managed to get rid of me yet.” Then, for good measure she adds, “And they won’t that easily, no matter how bad they want to.”

Pop freezes with his glass of water halfway to his mouth. He peers over the wire rims of his glasses, glancing between Minerva and her parents, waiting to see if they’re as concerned as he is.

The room holds its breath for a moment while everyone waits to see if Minerva will elaborate. When she doesn’t, Pop finally asks, “What do you mean, Mimi?”

Only Pop ever calls her that specific nickname. He’s used it less and less as Minerva has gotten older. If he’s pulling it out now, he must be full of worry.

Pop has a lot on his plate. Her whole family does, what with manning light stations and keeping the houses of their upper-crust, seasonal neighbors spotless. But Minerva has a lot on her plate, too, and she’s not sure how much longer she can keep it to herself without confiding in someone.

She sighs, making up her mind. Then, she tells them all about what it’s really like to be a female paratrooper.

Someone has been in her room since the last time she was home. It’s not like Minerva has anything to hide – anymore – so it’s not like this is the end of the world the way it would have been when she was fifteen. Still, the mirror over her vanity that she shattered the last time she was here has been replaced. Her mother must have come in to clean and discovered the smashed looking glass, the reflective shards strewn everywhere. No doubt she’ll have to explain that at some point during her visit.

Minerva turns her back on the new mirror and begins unpacking her bags. There isn’t much besides some letters that she wants to leave here so that they don’t get stolen. Or so she thinks, until she finds the bundled pair of socks in the bottom of her back.

The rolled pair is heavier than the others. The familiar weight of the secret is an anchor that immediately pulls her down onto her bed, staring at the bundle in her hands in disbelief. At the beginning of her time in Toccoa, this had been something that she thought about nearly every second of every day. Now . . . When was the last time she thought about this? What kind of person is she, if she could forget such a thing?

Helen was right, she thinks, hands trembling as she unrolls the socks to reveal the wad of letters folded up inside. I am a bad person.

Carefully, she unravels the small pile of letters until she reaches their center. When her eyes catch the rumpled yellow telegram they conceal, she pauses and sucks in a sharp breath before she can continue. She has not looked at this telegram since the day it arrived in Toccoa with the letters from her family and friends in Frisco – and she has not dared think about what hides between the folded yellow slip.

The ring sparkles, catching the light as she removes it from its hiding place. The chain it hangs on feels cold to the touch, just like the ice water currently churning in her stomach does. What would Jack say, if he knew that he spent all that money on an engagement ring just for Minerva to stow it away – out of sight, out of mind – the second that she was informed of his death? She should have kept that chain around her neck so her dead fiancé could be forever close to her heart.

There’s a soft knock at the door. Before Minerva has time to reply, the door opens and her mother sails in, just like in the old days. Although this time she freezes halfway to the bed when she sees what Minerva holds in her hands.

“Oh, Minerva.” In a second, she’s on the bed beside her, and Minerva has folded herself into her mother’s enveloping arms in a way that makes her feel like a small child who has just run to her mother after scraping her knees. “He loved you more than anything,” her mother finally whispers as she smooths Minerva’s hair.

She should be crying. Or at least she feels like she should be. Instead, Minerva lets her mother rock her back and forth while she squeezes the ring in her hand, staring at the new mirror above her vanity.

“Everything has changed,” she finds herself whispering the same realization that she had on the Women’s Division’s first night out. Except this time, it hits her even harder, because she’s in her old bedroom, but there is nothing familiar about the place anymore.

Just a few months ago, she was kissing her fiancé and wishing him luck as he joined the Navy. Then she herself had volunteered for the Airborne when it was announced that they would be accepting women for a new program. That’s when it all unraveled – when she had to break a mirror to destroy her reflection because it only showed her someone that was a showoff, who was vain, and who was an all-around bad friend. According to Helen Beauchamp, that is. God, she hopes that she doesn’t run into her former best friend while she’s home. That would be the last thing she needs, something she couldn’t withstand the pressure of.

When she finally comes back to herself, Minerva disentangles herself from her mother’s embrace and stares numbly at the ring still caressed in her palms.

“I should return it to Jack’s mother,” she decides aloud. “It feels right for her to have it.”

Her mother reaches up and smooths Minerva’s hair in a way that she only does when trying to comfort her – something Minerva really can’t remember the last time she did. “It’s up to you. He bought it especially for you, though.”

The cool band presses against her palm as Minerva closes the ring in her fist, squeezing it tight, as if demanding it spill out an answer. She’s so focused on the sensation that she almost doesn’t notice her mother’s featherlight touch on her arm.

“I have something for you.” Beneath them, the mattress shifts as Minerva’s mother repositions herself, removing something from her pocket in the process. Gently, her slender fingers unclench Minerva’s fist and place something in it.

She’s speechless when she realizes what she’s just been handed. There’s a moment of silence before Minerva finds her voice again. She fingers the pearls as if they might break, tracing the silver cross even more gently. “Your rosary?”

“You need it now more than I do,” her mother explains. “I would just feel safer knowing that it was protecting you.”

That statement really says something. This pearl rosary is the only connection that Minerva’s mother has to her past.

When she was about nineteen – or so everyone reasons – she had washed up on the shores of Cape Hatteras in a tattered dress with no memory, no name, and no idea where she was or how she got there. Her only possession was the rosary around her neck, which she clung to with an iron grip. Nevertheless, her frightened eyes and amnesia could not detract from her queenly stature.

It had been Minerva’s father who had found her as he walked from the Life-Saving Station to exchange his chit with the Surfman at the next station. He himself came from a proud line of people who had occupied the Outer Banks since the beginning of time – his family proudly joked that they had been the ones to welcome the Roanoke Colony settlers to the island, even though Minerva was pretty sure her father had stolen that joke from Will Rogers.

For her mother to offer her the only link to her past, to tell Minerva that the very item that had protected her for so many years would now offer her protection in war . . . A tugging sensation that Minerva has not felt for months floods her chest.

“Mom,” she breathes. “Thank you.”

There were so many times throughout her childhood and teenage years that Minerva felt that she didn’t understand her mother, that her mother didn’t understand her. It often felt like they were speaking a different language, and Minerva had forced herself into a mold to get along with her, to be perfect for her.

Now, though, when her mother slips the rosary over Minerva’s neck and embraces her once again, for the first time, it’s like they’re on the same page.

[datcrazyanniegurl]

Tell us about you know what please.

YES. Be prepared, it’s a long oneeeee!

I’ve known of LiS since the game came out due to the advertisements, but I didn’t think I would be interested in it at the time. Fast forward just over a year later, and I was watching all the big gamer guys and I kept getting recommended to watch their play throughs, so eventually I did. I watched MessYourself’s run of the game on my tv on two school nights lol. A whole cinematic experience. It also helped a lot that he also did a lot of choices that I would’ve clicked on too ahah.

As for, the you know who? I definitely did not like them immediately, and rather shipped Max with Warren and Chloe. It was mainly because I thought there was no way whatever fandom there was (oh boy, I somehow assumed there was next to no fandom for LiS at one point lol), would support the ship. Which even though I was rooting for Nathan since the moment he appeared on screen to be a scapegoat or a red herring the whole time, I thought was 100% fair because of all the crap he did to her and her friends.

I skipped over half of chapter three because I was watching all of it in one sitting, so I didn’t get to see their interaction in the diner. Big mistake. Because I wasn’t ready at all for the confession on the phone in the final episode - andddd as dorky as it sounds I was pretty much on the verge of tears because, while it obviously doesn’t justify the crimes he committed, I felt so bad for him and it felt pretty obvious to me that he never stood a chance to become a better person with his family, mental health struggles and family reputation pinning him down. In certain ways, I was able to relate to that. From that exact point on, I was more opened to the possibility of Caulscott actually being a thing.

I started reading fanfics out of curiosity on how their relationship would be justified in a post Save the Bay world, and it made me realise that shipping them together wasn’t as fair off as shipping her with Chloe in certain ways. Both relationships are about extending out second chances, and giving the lonely person an example of someone else (Max) showing them she cares, and giving the person room to eventually better themselves because they want to.

To me the whole game was about the different stages of mental health affecting different people and redemption, and who deserved to have it. That people are a lot more complex and complicated than what they may seem on the outside, and no one is truly just a ‘stereotype’; and that includes Nathan. It’s especially prevalent to me when Before the Storm came out that was the intended message with his character, at least. A ‘doomed character’ that might have a chance to finally live for the first time after doing something unforgivable? Yes please, I loveeee those cliches done right!

Didn’t help that in BtS Chloe literally made a comment about Samantha being a more shy version of Max and looks and behaves pretty similar. Also, the comments Nik Shriner has made over the years just further conforms my perfect delusion that they belong together lol.

So in conclusion, I’ve basically been shipping Caulscott pretty much right away for eight years straight now. No one has been able to stop me a boarding on this ship lol.

[aestariiwilderness]

Bad Batch Season 3, Episode I Don't Even Know And Honestly Will Not Be Keeping Track * SPOILERS * (solely because Mina Nunyabiz *REAL NAME REDACTED* has gone on so many diatribes about this inexcusable social faux pas on Tumblr known as failing to accurately and comprehensively tag your posts for pieces of media which some people haven't gotten to watching yet and this means that if they wish to be on Tumblr without getting unwanted foreknowledge they have to undergo some vast and imprecise tribulation known as filtering by tag)

I have come to two, nay, three, EIGHT whole conclusions: a. Tech hacked the Star Wars Internet. b. Tech was the Star Wars Internet. c. Pabu does not have Star Wars Internet. d. The Batch cannot function without their Internet. e. The Batch has lost its sole functioning strategic brain cell. Hemlock caught it when Tech fell. The muscle and the face are kind of just winging it now; the auxiliary brain cell said "haha see you later, losers, I need to be Rex's chauffeur"; and the attitude's first and only plan is, as always, just "KILL". f. These men are adorable and also utter morons. g. Crosshair has no experience with women. Ever. He doesn't even know how to talk to them. They're a different species to him even when they aren't literally a different species. His two methods of social interaction just recently expanded to three (murder, snark, and now mother hen) and still none of them have anything to do with proper behavior towards adult females. Let alone one who doesn't share his genes. You can tell by the way he wildly swung from default "PICK FIGHT/KILL" to "offer genteel non-sarcastic hand up to my ship without sarcasm after you almost got my Stockholm syndroming sister killed by a giant turtle because if I can't kill you I literally am at a loss for how to behave towards you". h. Tech was the only member of the squad who ever bothered to get a newspaper and check to see who they were actually fighting.

Omega IS unsettling. Well noticed Venti

Hunter, continuing to be the king of asking the specific follow-up questions that the audience feels is relevant and the askee absolutely cannot answer without losing their mysterious vibes (see: season 1 finale -- "WHEN did you have your chip removed, exactly" "Does it matter?" "YES")

Hunter, continuing to be the king of not getting an answer to his very reasonable specific follow-up question

For special ops commandos in a war they were literally created to fight, these guys do not seem to have much of a concept of "stranger danger"

"ASKING FOR A FRIEND" omigosh Omega. I have never been so ashamed of you. The big fascist experiment-happy regime is after you. WHY CAN YOU STILL NOT LIE

Why is Omega just. In charge now

And still the most unbelievable thing about this episode was like half a minute in with Crosshair willingly helping a random Pabuan AND not mercing them when they dared to smile, thank him, and use his name

HOWEVER MANY EPISODES IN AND WE JUST GOT TO THE ANSWER THAT EVERYBODY ALREADY KNEW ABOUT M-COUNTS

WAY TOO MANY EPISODES IN AND WE STILL DIDN'T GET A STRAIGHT-UP ANSWER ABOUT OMEGA'S

Qui-gon had a blood test! With a little litmus stick and everything! The crazy weed-addicted space monk had a scientific stick he jabbed baby Anakin with and HEY PRESTO M-COUNT SPREADSHEET. WHERE IS THAT HANDY BIT OF TECHNOLOGY HUH