#and Apollo is coming for Thailand

[respectthepetty]

Naughty Babe, who is Le Ling?!

I watched the Naughty Babe finale and had no idea who Le Ling was; therefore, I have to be annoyingly cringe about it, but before I begin, let me just say that Max looked delicious the entire eight episodes.

But also, this Daddy did too! And I'm not talking about Aon. No! Yi's father has been looking like an entire five-course meal every single time he appeared on the screen. This is the type of father that if your partner was acting up, forget about effing the friends. EFF THE DADDY! Sir, why are you looking so scrumdiliumcious? Is it all that money? Or is it the power? Perhaps it's you in red. Rawr!

Hand over heart, this entire family could get it. Mom included.

I gotta focus! The kids were in the playroom planning shenanigans.

This is a boy who gets it. I've always loved that his name is Syn because he sins but prays about it. Repents while he is doing it but still does it. Makes his sinful peeps pray too for good measure. We're not going to hell on his watch!

Lian not stopping Diao is funny because all throughout Cutie Pie, Yi would call Lian and be like, "your boy's at the club, but I'm only here to collect my man who I have 24-hour surveillance on, so sucks to be your trusting ass, but I'm built different, so I hope you get to your man on time before some serious shit goes down. Toodles!" These two are the pettiest friends, and I love my ghost ship.

POPPY! Where were you all season?! Hopefully filming Love Puzzle, so I can see you kiss a homie, but I was glad to see the secretaries in love and as chaotic as ever . . . in red.

Look at that face! That is a man trying to get all these heathens into the next life, YET THEY WON'T WORK WITH HIM! I guess the honeymoon will be in hell, Nuer!

This dog looked adorable, in red. So glad Domundi switched it out from the Cutie Pie dog. A+ casting choice.

This boat showing up was unnecessary! Was this supposed to be a rainbow moment because a high speed boat thingy coming out of nowhere was not the move?!

This blue color was even depressing Diao out. Get some yellow or orange back on my boy's body, NOW!

Look how vibrant that red ring box looked! LOOK AT IT! The ring looked really pretty with that red watch Diao was sporting too.

Red and white rose petals? They wasn't even married yet. Save them for the actual ceremony. Wasting expensive confetti. And the kissing too. Didn't have sex all this time, now they can't stop. Geesh!

I know this is tied into Chinese tradition and Yi's family being Chinese, but YI IS A RED RASCAL!

And leading up to this wedding, there had been so much blue to represent Diao's family being the hindrance to their love, and now this entire wedding was red to represent Yi and his family and Diao becoming a part of his family, and

Y'ALL CAN'T TELL ME NOTHING!

Then to have the gold dragons which represent Yi's family but are also Diao's color.

Y'ALL CAN'T TELL ME SHIT!

I'm in heaven. I do not care what the plot was. I do not care about the fake amnesia. I do not care about how the dog attack turned into a tiger attack. NO ME IMPORTA! Diao called out his father in front of all those rich ass people and God while wearing his man's color, and I'm living for it!

Kuea is a Red Rascal too, and I appreciated this public service announcement.

Diao sucked his thumb (😑), then they fucked, yet my color demon eyes only saw red candles. Thank you, props department!

Makorn asking if Diao wants a new husband (yes, sir. YOU!) while Yi wore red with that product placement red drink . . . *Mwah!* This blue table cloth gotta go though!

Red over Diao's heart, but that damn blue is still there! Diao, where is your yellow and orange, my man?! DONDE?! Oh yeah, they have kids with little rainbow toys. Good for them.

Hold on, was I supposed to remember this little girl? Diao was talking about her like I should know her. Who dafuq Le Ling?

Even this baby was confused. Who is this chick? Girl, for reals, who is you?! This feels like Buffy the Vampire Slayer's fifth season when Dawn was introduced. Like I KNOW I ain't seen this chica before.

Well . . . she's part of the family now, so good for her.

All in all, YI IS A RED RASCAL, and marriage equality will come to Thailand no later than 2026.

And same-sex partners will legally be able to adopt by 2029.

Naughty Babe, Cutie Pie, and Domundi said it with their full chest, and Apollo is gonna cosign it with his bouncy red ball because Red Rascals may not like each other, but they love to cause havoc when least expected, so . . . fuck it up, sis!

Amen.