#yeah it's august whatever
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localcryptic · 2 months ago
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if i think too hard about marshal steel i'm gonna end up on the news. he is making me actually insane. dog dad of the year. hated your guts when he met you. a kind and gentle lover. has made unforgivable mistakes. has also made charming stupid jokes. i can't tell if i want him to have a good calm life or if i want his guilt to devour him from the inside out. and on top of it all hes gay. happy pride month 🏳️‍🌈
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lizardthelizard · 2 years ago
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"...For twenty-eight years I only knew one thing. That my parents sent me away." ["We did that to give you your best chance."] "...But it doesn’t change the fact that, for my entire life, I’ve been alone."
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corpsentry · 4 months ago
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there’s something so epic about hetero chinese period dramas and i think one part of it is that there is absolutely nowhere in the narrative i could exist.
lately i’ve been on a western media detox— i’ve cleaned english language music out of my playlists and have never been able to stomach western dramas anyway, so that part is easy— which might seem funny, because if i’m in singapore and i hate it and i won’t touch american music then what’s left? the answer is the false binarism of chinese period dramas, at least for me. the badly written ones are misogynistic and stupid and the better ones are less of those things, but regardless the world that emerges is clean-cut and easy to parse. there’s someone to root for and someone to hate. there’s a girl and a boy. there’s the comedy and the drama, the sheer thick drama, the music that signals to you precisely how to feel before the scene even starts going
try to jam a fifth culture transnational transgender they/them with 2 mental illness and 1 autoimmune disease into this world and it simply doesn’t work. and that’s kinda epic lolzers! it’s like watching high fantasy, or super hardcore sci-if. it both represents a simulacrum of the real world and is so far from the reality you know that you understand it as a hypothetical universe, one that disincludes you on principle. i exclude myself from the story and in doing so fangfei from moyuyunjian’s steely gaze becomes all the more important. i give so many shits and laugh and yell and spectate. but i am safe from the eyes of its inhabitants. if i entered the story it would break. so i sit outside of it, clapping by myself
in other news, we gave up on mysterious lotus casebook 16 episodes in. there are many character archetypes in these shows that i can no longer stand; the salacious sexy seductive supervillain lady is not necessarily one of them but the way they did miss ‘this man didn’t even Look at me when all men fall at my knees so i hated him’ ‘no one is allowed to steal buttchin from me’ jiao was way up there. surely a woman can have multiple personality traits and yet you would think from this drama that that is not at all true. and the strange harem that grew around li lianhua despite his absolute loser attitude— like i get it, he’s the gintoki of this show, that’s hot, but the way the women who were into him were written made me want to Eat Horse. it bothered me that di feisheng and lianhua’s homo as fuck dynamic was so intriguing and them + fang duobing was a winning trio but all the women in the show were written like complete fucking ass, and one of the big antagonists being a woman, the stakes throughout were not only lost to me but also Pissed Me Off. also, that case about the corpse flowers dragged on forever and all my pocky wilted
I Just Think, women deserve better in these damn stories. make them slutty as hell, sure, but make them other things too and i mean this in the most generous sense. slutty and proud. slutty and weird. slutty and oblivious. literally anything at all so they don’t come out cardboard flat from all angles. this is why i have a personal vendetta against the ditzy clueless female protagonist as well because if everything stems from the fact that she doesn’t know shit it’s like please someone Please tell her shit i’m on my hands and knees begging. give her more to chew on she’s dying of boredom over there
this is why i liked the so called antagonist of blossoms in adversity best (spoilers ahead). he was cruel as hell to huazhi and gu yanxi’s only parental figure. he was paranoid and selfish and lonely and craved a son’s love from the one person he couldn’t hold onto. in the end he is pushed further and further by huazhi, who won’t give in, to isolate yanxi from the people he loves and to lash out at those people as a way of punishing yanxi. and when he dies it’s because of his own distrust, his own negligent parenting, his absent cruelty from decades of insomnia and lack of faith in his people. but he cries for yanxi, and there’s something so human about that. to think of evil not as a first principle but rather an adjective for a verb that is set in motion by other events. to be honest, i haven’t seen such thoughtful writing in any chinese period drama before or after that and i strongly suspect i will never see such writing again in this genre but man, it was so fucking good (spoilers end).
in the meantime, i’ve dragged my mother to moyuyunjian/the double for the return casting of liu xiening and wang xingyue who are Eating so hard. they’ve got wang xingyue done up with the sluttiest makeup and liu xiening is breaking my heart with her pout and her Sassy Mean constitution and this is a revenge story, yes, but it’s a double revenge story. it’s a grief story. and fangfei is carrying more on her shoulders than lingbuyi imo, and doing so with much more grace too. her step mom’s a dick but she’s a smart, 5d chess playing dick who wears hot shades of green so i’m personally interested enough to keep watching (something lotus casebook DID NOT accomplish with their epic female antagonist…. mein gotte). and the princess too. unhinged as hell but god, so charismatic. and beautiful, with scary big eyes and the sweetest head tilt. fun fun fun! that’s fun character writing right there. the comedy might be too straightforward for my tastes but everything else is kind of hot and sexy And after the coming of age ceremony when jiangli appeared amidst the flowers i felt my throat close up even though we saw her for all of one (1) episode). i was like yes. they got me alright. i Care now
really that’s all that matters isn’t it. we want stories about people we care for. we want to give a shit. why else would we listen to the stories of other people. we are looking for us and the people we love in them
oh also moyuyunjian soundtrack goes hard as hell i love a little three step waltz. here’s a pic from the ‘gym’ for ur time. guten night
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#gelmo#i get so. i get so angry when women write ass female characters like fr ur kicking urself in the crotch rn#you can be innocent/clueless about The World and still be so compelling#thinking about guxiang from word of honor. she was goofy and oblivious but she also had Teeth#and she was strong! and had opinions and stuff#so important to have opinions….. especially in the pre internet age#i hage so many more thoughts on this topic but i took melatonin which should knock me out so#this is not a well organized argumentative essay this is just me yapping in an empty room#but yeah i was disappointed at lotus casebook. particularly given its high as fuck reviews#reviews? i mean ratings. and stellar reviews or whatever#also the ending (sans 24 episodes of context granted) was ASS i was like ??? it’s over ??? surely not#idk it didn’t work for me. glad it worked for some other homies. fang duobing let me rescue u and the dog from this shit ass story#anyway……….. i have been unable to listen to english language music in some weeks now#this is quite major for me. given my 2 year indie folk phase. but i need a break from america and the ideological west at large#no more taylor biden…. justin kahan…………#just my chinese drama insert songs nct 127’s sixth album WALK and jacky cheung#it’s true i keep landing myself in these spots where i’m sick of america and i’m sick of singapore so how are my friends (from these two#countries) supposed to approach me. well the answer is they are not the country but it’s trhe i am in one of those weird holes right now#glad i’ll be leaving in august briefly! watch me go. awooooo
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jadetheblade4 · 5 months ago
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I forgot adults existed oops hi guys ^_^
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augentrust · 2 years ago
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don’t worry y’all, caleb can still use four whole spells (including counterspell!) from his spellbook since they don’t have a verbal component. and more importantly, his boyfriend loves him a lot and presumably has dark star prepared to do 8d10 force damage to ludinus’ stupid face
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smoreboi · 4 months ago
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im considering going back to making shitty youtube videos edited on imovie again just to try and feel some sense of purpose. dont have brawl stars downloaded rn because i kinda fell off on it, but i could to twst vids or something. record my dot connection game dailies or something, idk, just something to do.
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simptasia · 1 year ago
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my mum has stage four cancer
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tvonq · 3 months ago
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no way ive been walking around for like 3 weeks with my bank card and drivers license in a whole other purse…found that out today when i was tryna pay for the shopping
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thethingything · 5 months ago
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"why do I feel so weird and awful" says man who already made a post half an hour ago that included the reasons he feels weird and awful
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#vent post#I'm trying to work out if I need a fun distraction or if I need to do something cathartic instead#I feel strange in a way I can't quite place. I think I might be having emotional flashbacks#and I'm not like... upset at the moment? but I feel like in a couple of hours I'm gonna be hit with emotions I don't want to deal with#there's a very specific feeling that I can't seem to describe in any normal way which might mean I need to write poetry about it instead#something about summer evenings seems to fuck us up sometimes and it's just occurred to me that I think we write more poems in summer#and I only just noticed this pattern because I think we got to the start of summer last year#and started writing poems about how much the summer fucks us up#the thing is I like summer and I've been looking forward to it but it also comes with this kind of weird nostalgic feeling#and it ends up being really bittersweet#it's like that quote or post or whatever about August giving you some of the most beautiful but bittersweet moments of your life#every so often I'm like ''okay I say we get summer depression and winter depression but we're depressed all the time#so are we really getting special kinds of depression in summer and winter?'' and then I get to like June and November#and I'm like ''oh okay yeah no this is a different feeling to the background level of depression we have''#this fucks us up in new and exciting ways that I don't want to fucking deal with but will do anyway because I don't have a choice
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widevibratobitch · 8 months ago
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moments like this when im really glad im a sad little cynic who always considers the worst possible outcome and never lets herself truly get comfortable and trust the good things in her life to stay there and builds her life around trying to soften the blows of the eventual disappointments just waiting around the corner lol never leaving my edgy teenager era peace and love
#i mean if the alternative is whatever the fuck is going on with my best friend rn then hooooo boy#cancelling therapy immediately i never want to change i wanna keep my trust issues forever and ever if its gonna save me from THIS#is he a dick? kinda. yeah. and a coward because if dude was sure he didnt want it since AUGUST and didnt have the guts to end it till now#actually he didnt end it. she was the one who finally snapped. but we seriously fought twice before because she just woudlnt listen#when i said that girl this isnt gonna work and you trust him too much and you're attachment styles are incompatible as hell#your*#but nvm. the least you could do when a 7 years younger girl who's clearly obsessed with you is breaking up with you#cause she just cant take it anymore. and you can see she's still in love with you because you've been lying to her for half a year.#imo the least you could do at that point is just. dont tell her that jfc. just say you're sorry it didnt work out etc etc#dont fucking tell her you stopped being in love with her in fucking august#and just 'didnt know how to end it' and lied when she asked if everything's alright#like my god. yes ig this would never have happened if she hadn't trusted him so completely and expected love to fix her whole life#but jesus dude. she's not even 23 she has a right to be naive. you're almost 30. you DONT get to be a man child anymore#christ. okay.#anyway i wish i could help her but telling her to 'trust less' and 'never truly rely on other people' sounds horrible and cringe and edgy af#but i genuinely dont have any other advice#like babygirl im sorry but your bestie is a piece of human garbage and she's doing the best she can but her best is Not Much alas
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elytrafemme · 1 year ago
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i understand that remembering birthdays is Super Ultra Crazy Hard and whatnot like i get it, by all means i GET it, but if ONE more person fucking forgets when my birthday is i’m going to cancel any plans i was planning to make on my birthday and not see a single fucking person for that entire week. come hell or high water. [do not rb]
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supercantaloupe · 1 year ago
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genuinely except for maybe a passing interest in seeing camelot (which is closing too soon for me to do anything about anyway) i haven't wanted to actually Go To New York to see smth on broadway since the music man. i am going to do everything in my power however to go see this cabaret tho
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prolibytherium · 1 year ago
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so excited for the posting if UPS teamsters strike like “wjat about Packages Georg who is impoverished and disabled and queer living on a dirt road deep in the mountains and relies on daily UPS deliveries of food and medicine for his continued survival? What will he do during a strike? Should disabled people just die?”
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the-kipsabian · 9 months ago
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im sorry but orangekip being part of the ecosystem of aew ships is just. so wild to me my god
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akkivee · 1 year ago
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are we one and done with these or we thinking they’re going to be a factor in the off arc???? 🤔
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publicuniversalenemy · 1 year ago
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hi everyone im gonna fukcing Die now. i found literally the perfect fucking apartment a couple weeks back but i didnt move fast enough on it bc i was like. well the lease doesnt even start until fucking august. but GUESS WHAT!!!!! someone else snatched that shit up!!! in the last couple days!!!! so im so happy and thrilled right now ^-^
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