#im going through my purse and my card is NOT THERE im like wtf

[tvonq]

no way ive been walking around for like 3 weeks with my bank card and drivers license in a whole other purse…found that out today when i was tryna pay for the shopping

[echowithpain]

Alright. I know this is like super fucking late but I can ✨explain✨:

I got sick 😘

ANYWAY IM LESS SICK NOW 💃 SO HERE WE GO!!!!

Before we get into the breakdown of the episode, one question that popped into my head that I never got to type out is "How are the body cams gonna work if they're in a fire?" I know it's been a bit since the 118 has responded to any 5 alarm fires and had to go inside, but were the cameras heat proof or fire resistant?? What if the footage got burned up or you couldn't see anything because the lenses got smoke damage? Even though they never acknowledged that possibility in the show (besides the "you break it you bought it" line)/the body cams might never come back, I just wanted to bring it up

Okay! Captain Asshole taking Buck "under his wing" was funny as fuck and I loved how uncomfortable Buck looked through the whole thing 🤣 Oliver Stark is one hell of an actor 🥰

Next, the male cheerleader being ass backwards storyline was actually great for Eddie. The kid as he's getting wheeled away telling his mom not to call his dad before passing out, and for the first thing he did when he woke up was ask for his dad 🥺🥺🥺 Eddie needed to see that. To see that even though the kid was saying he didn't want to see his dad, he didn't really mean it. Just like how Christopher acts like he doesn't want to talk to Eddie, he just doesn't know how to after what happened (also fuck that storyline last season wtf), and being with his grandparents isn't helping that either

For the Hen and Karen storyline: Fuck that councilwoman 🖕🤬🖕 (also fuck the writers) I'm glad they were able to fuck over the councilwoman and get Mara back, but can we please finally have a break from these kinds of storylines for the lesbian couple? First the cheating, then Karen not getting pregnant, losing Nia, having Denny meet his biological father behind their backs, and then losing Mara and getting their foster care license revoked. Please let it end.

You know what I wanna see more of? I think it was the FOMO episode in season 5 when someone stole Karen's purse that was in their car and was using Hen's credit card that was in it. They tracked down the person to a club and ended the night dancing. THE ENTIRE TIME THEY LOOK LIKE THEYRE HAVING A BALL!!!!

GIVE US MORE OF THE WIVES BEING FUN AND HAPPY GOD DAMMIT!!!!!!!! 😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤

*sigh*

Anyway moving on to the tiger storyline, OH MY GOD IT WAS SO CUTE!!!! 💖🐯💖🐯💖🐯💖 I don't know if it was the lighting or just because tigers are naturally beautiful, but all shots with the CGI tiger were really pretty! I wanted to pet it 🥰 especially when it was a cub 😭💖😭💖😭💖

Also real quick, why didn't Maddie tell the woman to move away from the bathroom door? I know she told her not to open it, but I'm talking about earlier when she was telling her how to stop the bleeding in her leg. Why not say "make sure you're as far away from the door as possible"? I know Maddie probably didn't know she was right up against it, but you'd think she'd say it anyway because in case first responders need to break it down, you don't wanna be in the way of that. -1 point I guess?

Now, I feel like I need to clarify this. When I said this I meant I accepted Gerrard's "apology" for talking shit about Hen with the councilwoman. He's still a bigoted racist misogynistic asshole as shown in the previous episodes and the golf scene. He hasn't done anything to attone for that, and the fact that he gets to be comfortable in an easy job with his man crush is unfair. I understand he switched jobs with Bobby so the 118 could have him back, but still, feels like he was let off easy. Kinda like how some people are ignoring the fact that T*mmy acted the same way because they think he's hot 🤮

-1 point for unfairness

.

.

.

Was that all? I think that's all. Oh wait, I loved Bobby and Athena going house hunting and Athena not liking any of the homes. I was a bit worried when we could clearly see Bobby wasn't on board with rebuilding the old house, but they quickly eased my mind when he sat her down and explained that the old house was for her and Michael and they agreed to build a new house together 🥰💖🥰💖🥰 Love them 💖

Also Maddie and Chim are still amazing and I need to see the 118 + co playing paintball with each other. Maybe they go to a place and everyone has fun and there's some humor only for something to happen to one of the other teams and they have to help. Idk, I'm not on the writing team, but I will say this: Athena, Eddie, and Chim need to be on a team and absolutely DOMINATE everyone. That is all. 💖

Episode Rating: 🐯7/10🐯

-1 point for Maddie not telling the woman to move away from the door (she could've told her earlier and the woman easily could've moved back to it when the tiger was trying to get in), -1 point for Gerrard getting off easy and being comfortable in a job he likes, and -1 point for vibes. Idk man but something's keeping me from rating this an 8/10. I can't figure it out now cause again, still sick, but once I do I'll come back and yell it into existence lol

I'd say I'm excited for the next episode (I mean, I am), but I'm worried about what might happen to Denny 🥺

Guess I'll find out in a few hours 🤪

Thanks for reading and I'll see y'all for my liveblogging 😘✌️✨

[cattles-bians]

exes au part 11

post directory

obsetress: i'm about to fully fall asleep but i have been thinking about exes au danvi and like the isabel of it all and dani dating a single mom and how just like

obsetress: vi is so protective of isabel and as much as she loves dani like

obsetress: she took SO LONG before introducing her and then like

obsetress: when they broke up dani left and dani wasnt in isabels life anymore and dani was so good for isabel and viola just feels so fuckin shitty and blames herself and

obsetress: but i'm also thinkin bout soft fluffy stuff too like how much dani loves isabel and how much vi loves watching isabel w dani and

em: hey hannah what the fuck

obsetress: isabel has a nightmare one night and goes to her mom's room and dani's there too and she just curls up between them

em: do you think when they finally reconnected dani was like hey um. does isabel remember me. would it be weird if

obsetress: FUCK

obsetress: this absolutely happens

em: viola is VERY apprehensive at first

obsetress: god yeah esp after getting so hurt by it but

obsetress: viola sure cannot say no to dani!

em: i love some dani with kids tho

em: maybe too soft but do u think for at least a couple years dani would like. send isabel a bday card

em: like dead air otherwise

em: hmm idk i am chewing that one over more

obsetress: god it's hard i think dani wants to but she doesn't

obsetress: i could see dani writing them and holding onto them

em: oh that’s even worse

obsetress: even tho she really doesnt think she'll ever talk to vi again

em: what a soft and depressing thought. thank u. i resent u.

obsetress: yeah it hurts!

obsetress: but then she does! and she gives them all to isabel when she's older maybe

em: hold on i’m gonna bawl

em: sometimes my parents will be like um. do u remember this person and i’m like uh i don’t remember people i worked w two years ago let alone

em: but i think isabel does

em: i will be thinking about this all afternoon bestie have a wonderful slumber

[em note: em yells in hannahs DMs while she's asleep dot png]

em: no um. mate im still furious about the isabel of it all wtf

em: thinking about um. like ok i dont wanna use isabel as a prop but this is certainly one of those times where

em: violas been hurt before and viola's hurt other people before because she's deeply troubled and i feel like that would be one of the first times she sorta. sure she licks her wounds and feels miserable for herself but its also like uh

em: really sobering to realise This Hurts Isabel Too

em: because yknow violas very gatekeep gaslight girlboss i think shes got a strong enough sense of self that nothing really shakes that. maybe even to a deluded degree. i dont think she goes to therapy because shes like wow im fucked up i gotta get help, she's more like

em: shes really driven by her love for isabel!! gestures WILDLY

em: realised this is an au where parents get therapy and dont pass their traumas onto their kids and i want OFF this WILD RIDE im so tired of discovering things about myself through the realm of fiction

obsetress: yeah same i kept thinking about it too alfkadlsfkjdasf

obsetress: i want to reply to every single line of the isabel thing but i'm not gonna do that so let me just say: YEAH

obsetress: like isabel is her cornerstone full stop everything comes down to isabel

em: dani's probably so nervous reconnecting w isabel again. absolutely spinning her lil wheels

em: they set up a lil date and time and dani's doing her gay nervous babble abt if isabel even remembers her or god forbid resents her n jamies like...

em: im pursing my lips as i draw a line on the whiteboard between jamie's whole childhood and isabels and shaking my head Goddamn It

em: jamie lets dani babble it out n pauses and reflects on what she's saying n then jamie's like. the fact ur nervous means u care. n kids are v good at picking up when ppl care. you'll be alright.

obsetress: god yeah this bit i can just. hear it

obsetress: it's so visceral

---

em: viola

obsetress: god my favorite taurus hedonist

[em note: hannah yells in em's DMs while em is asleep dot png]

obsetress: god fuck what was i thinking about isabel this morning like

obsetress: that's what i get for daydreamin between snoozes and not writing it down alas

obsetress: but just like how excited isabel is to see dani again when she does and also like, isabel and rebecca

obsetress: then i started thinking about

obsetress: rebecca and vi getting married and vi's always like i'm not gonna get married again it's bullshit and rebecca's like it's not for me but then they just

obsetress: like they live together and they share everything and rebecca looks out for isabel just as much and they get to a point and it's like

obsetress: oh. oh

obsetress: like they're both like it's the logical thing to do. it's logical and it's safe and we should have this extra layer of protection but also it's like

obsetress: they find themselves more and more excited a lil you know? and just thinking about how isabel's there and how excited isabel is and

obsetress: but god yeah what i was thinking about this morning like. one day vi has to tell isabel dani's not gonna be coming around anymore and like

obsetress: isabel doesn't really understand and she's so sad and then vi feels even shittier

obsetress: and she's like "we'll be okay. it's you and me, remember? moving mountains"

obsetress: "you me us, right?"

obsetress: the first time rebecca meets her she brings her a book as a gift and is like "this was one of my favorites" and

obsetress: OH I REMEMBERED

obsetress: so like when dani sees isabel again finally (and yknow as nervous as dani was vi was even more on edge because it's so inconsistent and is she gonna understand yknow? and the two of them just spiral––which is also another thing about the two of them in a relationship! i think they push each other down spirals)

obsetress: jamie's there too and dani's like "this is... this is, uh, jamie" and it's like you said jamie isabel parallels and so jamie's like a lil tender

obsetress: spoiler: isabel and jamie end up bonding the most

obsetress: jamie's like running around with isabel on her shoulders and then showing her all these plants and taking her to gardens and

obsetress: another tentative jamie vi alliance

em: isabel mikey hangout When

obsetress: isabel mikey hangout!

obsetress: they're hanging with isabel and she and jamie have a very spirited discussion where isabel's like "i wanna be a princess" and dani's like "why not a knight?" and jamie's like "why not opt out of the feudalistic hierarchy entirely and ditch the kingdom for the high seas?" and convinces isabel to go full pirate

obsetress: and then isabel kinda passes out with her head in jamie's lap and jamie's just kinda idly playing with her hair (vi is already like "am i... attracted to jamie in this moment?")

obsetress: and jamie's like "y'know, i should bring mikey round next time isabel's here" and viola's like "......who?" and jamie's like "my little brother? mikey?" and viola's like "right.... right"

obsetress: cut to later, when dani and jamie have retired to vi and becca's guest room: "since when does jamie have a little brother?" "she always has, babe"

em: kinda obsessed w like. violas love for isabel means her wires get crossed when the surly gardener is Good With Kids

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: mikey and isabel immediately hit it off i think

obsetress: a bit of an odd couple because i think isabel is definitely, like, her mother's daughter and mikey is............. mikey

obsetress: but i think they meet in the middle and help each other grow and play pirates together

em: viola is like. of course mikey and isabel will get along. isabel is wonderful. but jamie is quietly Sweating about the whole thing

em: so damvibecca are having their afternoon tea and their little cakes and jamie is Quietly sweating and she’s like ‘quiet is good, right? like they’re not tryna k-‘ and then there’s the sound of two 8 year olds (idk how old they are tbh) YELLING as they chase each other down the hall w wrapping paper tubes

obsetress: nervous babbling dani x quietly sweating jamie, an otp

em: isabel has gotten into the make up n given them both black eyes n scars and moustaches n everyone’s like oh no how’s viola gonna feel about this but viola is DELIGHTED

obsetress: dani's like "chill you all she's gonna––" and then viola is getting up and asking them to do her face too

em: made a parrot outta a sock and newspaper

obsetress: viola playing pirates w isabel and mikey

em: kids w their endless creativity n absolute disregard for personal property is truly a thing of dreams

obsetress: mikey gives her a paper tube and she disarms isabel, takes hers, and offers it very seriously to jamie

em: cuteeee

obsetress: rebecca's giving dani a look and dani is completely unfazed and reaching for another tea cake

em: absolutely unflappable dani clayton

em: dani and rebecca sharing a Look like hey have you ever seen her this gleeful

obsetress: there is something very tasty about jamie taylor having a direct hand in making viola so gleeful

em: takes a village!

obsetress: when viola's two big loves are sitting five feet away from them both

em: everyone changes everyone for the better

em: fucken soft ass chat over here

obsetress: everyone changes everyone for the better

obsetress: soft as hell

em: thesis statement everyone likes each other so much (jamie pretends she doesn’t)

obsetress: (jamie pretends she doesn't) (jamie might like everyone the most)

obsetress: viola registers mikey for isabel's school n pays full tuition

em: oh my god

obsetress: jamie is horrified and refuses to accept it and viola waves a hand and is like "too late, deposit's non-refundable"

em: (they carpool)

obsetress: PLEASE

obsetress: oh god and like

obsetress: flora and miles go there too

obsetress: full circle complete

em: broke: highschool au woke: guardians of primary schoolers au

obsetress: dani jamie in bed jamie's like "you don't...... think it's weird?" "hmm?" "mikey going to.... school with our boss' kids?" "why would that be weird" "i dunno" "he also goes to school with my ex's kid" "he's best friends with your ex's kid" "and that's not weird, is it?" (grumbles) "not anymore" "so why would this be?"

em: jamie’s ribbing mikey for his silly tie and straw hat but she teaches him how to tie a tie and also she keeps crying for some reason???

obsetress: oh fuck

em: mikey: can’t i just get a fake tie >:/

jamie: no because when u have a real tie you can leave it untied a little as an act of rebellion

obsetress: god it's jamie crying for me

em: i love that big baby

obsetress: so much!

em: jamies like idk what’s gotten into me i never cry n danis like. raises one eye brow and mentally checks off all the times jamie has absolutely bawled watching a movie

em: not even a sad movie

em: dani plays along

em: maybe ur getting soft in ur old age jamie

obsetress: jamie i cry three four times a day five if i'm being honest taylor

em: thinking about their weekly weekend lunch w damvibecca and hannah and owen and miles and flora and

obsetress: dfjsldkfjslfslfj

obsetress: god big found family

obsetress: you know viola doesn't like

obsetress: dani and jamie respectfully toe around whatever the fuck owen and hannah have going on but viola just does not suffer it. she's so blunt to them

em: big viola grin and all ‘owen, hannah, i assume you will be each other’s dates?’ (owen chokes on his tiny egg sandwich)

em: hannah grose is serene and unreadable as she dabs a bit off yolk off owens moustache

em: maybe even a bit pleased

obsetress: everyone is always so tense when viola and hannah get together because neither of them take shit yknow

obsetress: and everyone's like "which way is this gonna go"

em: god. peak snarky broads

obsetress: but usually they end up good. two apex predators where one is a lil vicious but the other is so confident in its status that it just chills

em: they have the Best gossip

obsetress: would love to sit in and listen as they drink tea and gossip tbh

em: viola presses owen on hannah and he goes red and viola presses hannah on owen and she does a little wouldnt-you-like-to-know into her tea

em: viola nee willoughby and hannah grose friendship is. truly something i never knew i needed until now

em: they’re both just that lil bit older than the rest of the gang too

obsetress: an important coalition

obsetress: hannah grose! hannah looking out for rebecca and that's the couple times she gets a lil testy w vi

obsetress: mikey and isabel besties but flora and mikey get along really well and isabel and miles do too i think

em: the sheer chaos of a taylor-lloyd-windgrave story time

obsetress: LDKFjKLSDJF HELP

obsetress: taylor lloyd wingrave story time

obsetress: jamie suddenly very invested in story time

obsetress: dani's like "i know this is the first time you've actually cared about story time, babe, so let me give you some pointers"

em: i was just in my head thinking fondly about like. jamie is a drop out and plays a lil dumb sometimes for fun but also prolly reads a lot especially to mikey and now i’m like. wait i’m talking to Ms Floras Two Moms herself

em: idk if i had that headcanon before i read she taught me a lesson alright but yknow what! doesn’t matter it’s a beautiful one

obsetress: thank youuuu i love it a lot

obsetress: jamie big reader is generally one of my fave headcanons tbh i'm glad it seems to be widely accepted. can't even explain why it's just nice

em: sometimes i will talk 2 ppl about my passionate drop out jamie taylor belief n then they’re like but she’s smart (it’s only happened a couple times hahsj) and i’m like these aren’t mutually exclusive!! this is my very biased experience but my friends who do manual labor for a living seem to read so much more than my friends who don’t

em: your brain wants to chew over things while the hands are workin i reckon

obsetress: yes yes yes yes yes

obsetress: i think that's also like (sighs heavily)

obsetress: symptomatic of hegemonic perceptions of the working class

em: i love when u sigh heavily it’s always a fun take

obsetress: i think jamie is v clever and reflective and like if there's one thing i've learned getting older it's

obsetress: smart doesn't matter i think the most insightful most thoughtful people are the most reflective ones

obsetress: like none of it fuckin matters just be a nice person

[girlwhocried5sauce]

headcanon for being on your period and dating sweetpea

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

fyi: I listened to Him & I x G-eazy ft. Halsey while writing this.

(((credit to the *unknown owner of this gif*)))

warnings: references to sexy times, some swearing, and pretty pg-13 type of stuff

🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

.

.

.

-you weren’t due for that time of the month for a few more days so you weren’t exactly prepared for the aftermath or bleeding through your pants

-plus it hadn't happened within the seven months that you and sweetpea had been dating

-you and sweets making out in his trailer on his couch for like a good twenty minutes

-being on top of him with his hands wrapped tightly around your waist and your hands on his face

-let’s just say the boy is vocal

-both of you whimpering and panting im crying

-you getting up to get a condom (because safety first kids)

-“babe don’t panic but you’re bleeding. like through your pants.” he said

-sweetpea was shooketh

-and after a few moments of your own embarrassment, you realized your light denim jeans were permanently ruined

-“damn it, these are my favorite jeans” you sighed

-“forget your pants y/n, ill buy you more! you are bLEEDING”

-“sweets im fine relax”

-“I dont know what to do should I call your parents?”

-“fUCK I did this to you didnt I?”

-“breathe baby breathe. its just aunt flo”

-“you mean???”

-“its my period sweets”

-“OHHH”

-“so you mean this has never happened to toni or any other person with a uterus that you know?”

-“no. at least I don’t think so?? I mean she has asked for my jacket a couple times but I just thought she was cold so I didn’t ask questions ”

-changing into a pair of his gym shorts

-explaining to him how periods work bc the boy hardly pays attention in school

-“thanks for not making me feel stupid about not knowing all this stuff”

-ruffling sweets hair and making him smile cause hell, this boy can be really soft sometimes

-but only with you of course

-and toni occasionally

-you only had one spare pad/tampon in your purse so you had him go to the local 24-hour supermarket to pick up some more and a couple other things

-he refused to take your money before he left bc “it cant be that expensive right?”

-you tried to tell him it definitely can be that expensive 

-he still refused to let you pay

-being on facetime with him the whole time to make sure he got the right stuff

-”so is your flow heavy or light? wings or no? what the fuck is a diva cup and why does it look like a bell?”

-him almost getting into a full-blown fight with the cashier guy who side eyed him

-”the hell are you looking at me like that for? mind your business..or do you want me to mind it for you” he said charging at him like he always does lmaoo

-”I can ring you up over here if you want” an older lady cashier said from the next lane

-”just go to her line babe, she seems nicer,” you said, still on facetime

-”I think its very sweet what you’re doing.” she told him which made him a little less mad at what happened moments before, with the other cashier

-”your total is $17.59.”

-”the fuck is the shit so expensive for?” LOL

-when you got back to his trailer he was still shook bc of the price lmaoo

-he is the absolute definition of ((((a bad boy whose only good for you))))

-the next few days were very interesting

-“what are you hungry for today princess?”

-“anything greasy or sweet”

-so he got you both

-from pops obviously

-“and I got you this gift card to that makeup store you like”

-“sweets where’d you get the money for this???”

-“mowed a couple lawns, helped fix a couple bikes. no drug money was spent I promise”

-cause he knows how you feel about dealing drugs

-smiling @ how cute he is bc HELLO

-“you didn’t have to do all this babe. I would’ve been fine with just spending time with you which made him blush im screaming

-of course, guys (both ghoulies and serpents) would give him shit for being “whipped”

-“okay but I’m getting laid on the regular…what exactly are you all doing besides riding my dick??”

-him definitely getting into a fight that night

-with you playing nurse as soon as he walked through the door with cuts and bruises all over him from head to toe

-him staring at you while you tend to his wounds

-“whats on your mind mayweather?”

-“nothing… I just really do love you y/n…and not just because you save me from all the hospital bills that I would have if it weren’t for you”

-I feel very confident that sweetpea would rub your back or massage your feet if they were swollen

-“the back pain, cramps, mood swings, swollen feet, this all sounds like you’re pregnant babe I looked some stuff up and-”

-“my period coming means I’m not pregnant sweets don’t worry”

-“you sure cause I was a little late pulling out that one night”

-him being a dork and forgetting that you were now on the pill

-“well I wouldn’t be opposed to it. I could definitely see you as a milf”

-after laughing for ten minutes you’d stop and realize something

-“you think about that type of stuff??”

-“I mean yeah sometimes”

-he’s always softer with you than anybody else but he’s especially soft with you during that time of the month

-“toni told me about these PMS brownies from that bakery down the street, and idk how their supposed to help with the pain but she said they really work”

-“this is awesome thank you sweets” you would bring his head down to kiss his nose

-laying down on the couch with him and watching law & order:svu

-“you remind me of detective stabler, pea” you said

-“my temper isnt that bad babe”

-it totally is

-especially if anyone ever got outta pocket with you

-“oh so that one time you broke malachi’s jaw was really necessary?”

-“absolutely baby”

-“ive been called a bitch before sweets and I was kinda acting like one that day”

-“I dont give a fuck, he still shouldnt have said it”

-“I love you sweets”

-”you too princess”

——————————————————

a/n: this was soo much longer than it should’ve been but you already know wtf to do! and that is to leave feedback please xx

sweetpea playlist

sweetpea x reader (woc)

part two

sweetpea first time appearance as a couple

[bulletproof-fantasies]

Finding You: Chapter Thirty-One

Pairing: Min Yoongi/ OC

Genre: Soulmate AU!

Summary: Sometimes, a tag is enough.

Warnings: Mentions of depression, past suicide attempts, and cheating.

Previous Chapter / Next Chapter

All Chapters / All Chapters for Mobile

Author’s Note: I honestly have no idea how concert tickets work and stuff so I based it off of seeing a theatre play live. I am sorry if it’s like “Karnia wtf are you writing??!!???” 

Chapter Thirty-One:

Alex had always wanted to go to a concert but, now that she was actually at the venue of one, she wasn’t so sure why. She hated crowds with a deep and almost irrational fear. There were too many people and she felt like she did in her anxiety dreams, lost and drowning. Looking at the sheer amount of people lined up outside the venue almost scared her enough to send her home, but then she remembered August. She had to meet him, even if it meant being swallowed by an ocean of people to the point of panicking.

She just couldn’t suffer waiting to finally see him face-to-face anymore. She felt like she had been waiting her entire life to meet him and on some level she really believed that was true, she just didn’t know it was August she was waiting for until recently. Now that she knew, she wasn’t going to let a little thing like a crowd stop her. So she took a deep breath and got into the line, taking care to breathe in and out slowly.

At some point while she was waiting, a man had come out to tell them they would be allowed into the building at seven. Upon checking the time, and maybe peeking to see if August sent her any messages, it was two hours away. She tried to think if she had ever waited in a line this long in her life. She had been to amusement parks countless times but she was most definitely sure she hadn’t waited two-hours in a line to get on a ride. To be honest, she wasn’t sure she’d ever do this again.

For two hours she needed to occupy herself. Alex knew that if she didn’t keep herself busy she’d start looking around to see if maybe she could try to pick a stranger out in the crowd who might be August. A part of her mind told her that she should be able to recognise him as soon as she laid her eyes on him, but in reality she knew that was stupid. Life wasn’t a fairy tale and she wasn’t going to know which person around her was the one she loved just by connecting eyes.

Shaking her head, she brought her phone out and tried to think of something to do. At this time, Jess would be sleeping but she still decided to snap her a picture of the building with the caption “nervous.” After that she decided to take a picture of the sky and post it on her Tumblr, explaining she had arrived safely. Once she finished that, her eyes were drawn to the little letter icon and before she could stop herself she opened her messages and then went to her conversation with August.

[Sent at 5:26 PM]: There are a lot of people here. I’m so nervous.

Once she sent that, she registered that she felt just a little better. It took him a bit of time to answer and it kind of worried her at first, but as soon as she heard the notification she relaxed. With swift fingers, she tapped her screen to bring it back to life and then quickly put in her password. A little smile came to her face once she read.

[Received at 5:30 PM]: youll feel better when were sitting next to each other. try to just take deep breaths.

[Sent at 5:31 PM]: I am already on it.

Alex paused to look around, trying to see if she could spot a male using his phone and obviously texting. August knew what she looked like so she felt like if he saw her he’d hang close. After a moment, she managed to tear her eyes away and finish her thought.

[Sent at 5:33 PM]: Can you see me at all? In the line?

She bit her lip while she looked around some more. She caught the sight of a lot of people texting but she had no idea if any of them were him. Five minutes ago she promised she wouldn’t do this to herself and yet here she was. Alex took a deep breath and looked down at her phone when it vibrated and made a little sound.

[Received at 5:35]: i cant im sorry. i wish i could.

She couldn’t pretend she didn’t feel the disappointment crushing her a bit. It was like a heavy weight set inside of her stomach that was trying to drag it down. Forcibly, she shoved it away and focused on the bright side. She would see him soon. In less than two hours they’d be side by side and the very first thing she was going to do was hold him tightly.

[Received at 5:37 PM]: just stay calm. you will do alright.

Alex drew in a slow and deep breath and nodded to herself. She would do alright if she just kept thinking about the end-result and focusing on it. As long as she kept her fear out of the forefront of her mind, she would be okay. So instead of worrying or counting down minutes, she went opened up Tumblr and began scrolling.

 …

 The line was shuffling forwards and the doors were finally open. They were being sorted in specific lines based on the tickets they would be claiming and Alex needed to bring her papers to the place where she could pick up her tickets, as August instructed. As Alex drew closer and closer to the man who was directing them, her stomach began to churn. She had no reason to be nervous and yet she was because her anxiety always went off the wall about such things. What if her ticket was fake? What if it didn’t work? What if there was a problem and they needed to see the buyer’s ID? What if she couldn’t claim the ticket with the information she had? What if something went wrong and August was forced to sit alone and wonder if she had bailed on him?

Now that she looked at the receipts, August’s name was nowhere to be found nor was hers. That was slightly concerning. What if Jess was right? What if this was some kind of prank? She took in a deep shuddery breath and, when it was finally her turn to stand in front of the man handling the papers, she licked her lips so they weren’t so agonisingly dry and then handed the papers over to him.

She felt like she was in the middle of waiting for an eternity while he looked over the details but it was the moment he pulled his brows together and made an expression of confusion that she knew something wasn’t right. He looked at her for a long moment, taking in her appearance. Maybe it was just her anxious nature, but under his gaze she felt like he was under the impression she had stolen the papers.

“Where did you buy?” he asked her rather directly. That only made it official.

“It was sent to me by my friend. He bought them,” she explained, trying to speak through how dry her throat had suddenly become. Her Korean was a lot better since she had met August, but she hoped it was standing up now.

The man, who was rather tall and intimidating compared to Alex, glanced back down at the papers and then stepped aside, he motioned for her to step out of line too. She knew she was fucked. She was going to end up in a jail-cell by the end of this, she could feel it. Had she been set up? No, August wouldn’t do that. She refused to let herself think that it was possible. So it must have been some kind of misunderstanding or mistake.

The man directed someone else to take his job directing the traffic of the line and then brought Alex into the building. He found a woman who was perhaps twenty feet away, speaking quickly with someone else and then showed her the ticket information. Alex took deep breaths, just trying to focus on not passing out while the man talked to the person that was obviously his manager. After a few minutes, with neither of them giving away any information with their expressions, the woman came over.

“Could I please see your ID?” she asked politely as she gave Alex a smile.

Fuck. They were going to call the police. Or maybe they were already there? She was probably three minutes away from being put in the back of a cop-car, she could feel it. Alex swallowed hard and reached for her purse, hands jittery. She dropped her wallet when she finally got it out and then bent over to frantically pick it up after. She unzipped it and then took out her driver’s licence.

The woman took a look at her card and then looked onto her clipboard. She did a couple of checks and then looked back at Alex and gave her a smile, handing it back to her and then passing her an envelope. Alex blinked a few times and looked down at it, confused.

“I’m very sorry, there was a misunderstanding. This is your ticket,” the woman said in a comforting tone. “Please enjoy the show. I will show you to the line.”

Alex swallowed hard and almost felt like one of those cartoon characters; she was ready for her jaw to hit the floor. “Oh…a-alright. Thank you.”

“We apologise for that mistake, please follow me,” the woman said professionally as she led Alex through the building to the area where she would enter the hall.

When they got to their destination, Alex noticed immediately that the area sectioned off with thick black rope that cut up the space into a neat maze-like line and no one besides her was there yet. She glanced at the woman, almost like she was terrified she would take her ticket away and then timidly moved to stand as the first person in line. She took a deep breath and tried to relax after that.

“Please enjoy the show. Thank you for understanding.”

Making a weak sound of approval, Alex watched at the woman left and directed a man who had followed in behind them to collect ticket stubs. Once she was gone, Alex took a deep breath and allowed herself to relax. It didn’t really work but she tried.

“May I collect your ticket?” the man asked her as he came to stand in front of the door.

Alex nodded meekly and took out her ticket with shaking hands. He ripped it and then stamped her hand. She put her ticket back inside the envelope and then stored it in her bra, for safe measure. After she managed to calm down a little more, she took out her phone and began to text August, explaining the weirdness that had just occurred and how she was pretty fucking sure she almost had a heart attack.

[Sent at 7:27 PM]: First night in Korea and I thought for sure that I was going to be hauled off to jail.

[Sent at 7:27 PM]: Go figure.

 …

 Getting to her seat had been a breeze considering the issues she had with her ticket. She felt like her insides were twisting while she watched people filter into her section of the hall. She paid close attention to every person she could, hoping one of them would see her and smile. But that didn’t happen. By the time her section was almost full, her stomach began to bubble and she felt nauseous.

“Where is he?” She wondered, the words in her head even sounding stressed out.

Alex wasn’t sure she had ever felt her heart beat like this. It was beyond the point where she could feel it in her ears. The muscle was pumping the blood in her body so quickly that it was making her feel light headed and a bit tingly. Taking deep breaths, trying to regulate the harsh beating against her ribs, she kept watching the entrance. However, eventually, no one else was making their way into the section anymore.

“He’s just late,” she told herself with a firm nod of her head. “He’ll be here really soon and you’ll finally be able to hug him and you will probably end up crying like a little bitch.”

Alex kept telling herself that over and over, but soon the entire place was packed, the lighting began changing and the seat next to her was still empty. She sunk into her seat a little bit and took out her phone, just trying to keep herself breathing normally. She had never been stood up before and this was a completely new kind of anxiety.

[Sent at 8:15 PM]: August, where are you? It’s starting soon.

She was shaking and she wondered if anyone else in her row could feel it. Alex was doing everything she could to keep herself from bursting out into tears. Humiliation was a light word for everything she was feeling and all the warnings Jess had voiced to her started coming to the surface of her mind. Despite everything, she kept following August’s advice, forcing herself to take deep breaths as she tried to calm down.

If he didn’t reply, she wasn’t sure that she would be able to sit through the concert. It would be so hard to actually enjoy it while she wanted to break down and cry. But he had bought the ticket and this was not a cheap show. She truly didn’t know what to do with herself and so it kept her utterly still and frozen.

It didn’t make sense that he would go through all this effort and then just ditch her. She knew that. And now she was worried about him because what if something happened to him on his way there? She didn’t think she was capable of panicking harder than she had been without actually having an attack and yet there she was, literally so close to losing it. The only thing that saved her from it was the vibration that came from her phone in her hands.

The screen was a bit blurred and she hastily wiped the tears away from her eyes while she struggled to read the message.

[Received at 8:20 PM]: im so sorry alex work held me. i will be late. but ill be there.

Taking a deep breath, relief flooded her body and it just made her eyes water more. She knew that she was overreacting to everything but she couldn’t help it. She was in an unfamiliar country alone in a situation she was frankly super anxious about. The panic had just sent her into overdrive.

Her hands shook as she heard people start to cheer. She looked up at the stage and saw figures rising out of the centre of it. That was BTS down there. Min Yoongi was in the same room as her, his beautiful face coming up on the huge screens behind the stage along with everyone else. The music began pounding and she gripped her phone a bit tighter.

In all her life, she never thought she’d look upon Min Yoongi and feel no excitement. She had been dreaming for years about being in this very position, but now it seemed so underwhelming. She knew why. She knew why without a doubt. Alex had always wanted to see BTS in person and to hear their music live. But those desires were so small in comparison to how badly she wanted to feel August next to her, holding her hand.

The truth was that Alex had never wanted anything as badly as she wanted him and she couldn’t help but dwell on that.

 …

 By the time the concert came to the half-way point, she knew August wasn’t going to be able to make it. She was disappointed, but it wasn’t his fault. Even being a foreigner, she knew how hard it was to get anywhere in Seoul while trying to drive a car and at this hour the traffic would be awful.

When it ended, she was straight up bummed out but trying to think of how she would talk about the concert to him. The thing Alex absolutely refused to do was make him feel guilty for this or like he wasted his money, so she committed all the little moments to memory and memorised details to recite later.

As people filtered out, she decided just to sit in her seat and wait for them to clear out. She hated the crowds too much to rush and there was no hurry anyways. She hadn’t received another text from August but she wasn’t going to push it, she was going to wait until he said something.

Once another fifteen minutes passed, she got up and began to make her way to the exit, however there was a man waiting there who had an official-looking ear-piece in while he held a clipboard. He was probably just supervising the exit-traffic, but her stomach churned upon seeing him. She forced herself to be calm as she prepared to walk past him but then held her breath as it felt like someone sucker-punched her when he suddenly spoke.

“May I see your ticket?”

Alex wanted to groan. This was the most stressful night and here was some more stress to complement that. She was sure she could break out and cry at any moment now if her body truly felt like betraying her.

She felt a little awkward as she removed the ticket from her shirt and handed it to him. He flipped it, saw that it was initialed and then smiled at her. “Please follow me.”

“Not this again for fuck’s sake just let me go home and bawl, please,” she thought pathetically as she watched him turn.

Alex sighed deeply and followed him, keeping close as he lead her though the building. She had no idea what was going on. She was probably going to jail, like she suspected early. They let her enjoy the concert first and now they were hauling her off.

Except they weren’t because, even through her panic, she wasn’t stupid. As she followed the man, it became clear she was being taken deeper into the building and then it evidently became clearer she was being led backstage. By the time that she got to a door, he turned to face her and gestured for her to open it, her heart was hammering.

“We apologise for any misunderstandings,” he told her with a smile.

Why were people saying that?  What the fuck was going on? She really wished someone would just stop being so cryptic and actually explain something to her. She was way too worn out for these kinds of mind-games and confusion.

“If you’d go inside, Mr. August will be here to see you soon.”