#y'know I... I could never figure out what love meant

[moa-broke-me]

ok but can we talk about how, if Lukabeth HAD been a thing, it would've played out a LOT like Sarah Lynn and Bojack Horseman's relationship did?

Like the only difference I can think of, and also the most important one, is that there's no way in tartarus Luke would wait those 17 minutes.

[isawritesshit]

The Color Blue - Chapter 1

image taken from @ lovevivianne on pinterest

Synopsis: As the only daughter to the leader of the Kamo Clan, you were trained and protected to one day bring your father honor through your marriage to the heir of the Gojo Clan. However, your husband ended up being something that your family never prepared you for. As you come to navigate a new world of politics between the clans, your husband convinces you that there is nothing wrong with honoring yourself too.

Warnings and Content: fem! reader and slightly ooc! (?) gojo (ig; i feel like i didn't write him as in character as i wanted), cursing, allusions to and anxiety about marriage consummation, themes of traumatized and anxiety-ridden reader, themes of forced/arranged marriage

Author's Note: Fuck me in the ass, it took me wayyy too long to get this out to y'all I'M SOOOO SORRY GUYS I DIED AND NOW I AM REBORN BACK AND SEXIER THAN EVER! Anyway, I'm at least happy to finally get this out for you guys because you guys gave me so much love for the prologue (mwah mwah). If you have yet to read the prologue, pleaseee do so! Provides some good context to the premise of the story. I'm going to flag once more that there will be themes of nsfw and physical/mental abuse down the line!

Word Count: ~7.3k

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"Are you afraid of me?"

He spoke. You masked your surprise easily. Did you look afraid? What made him suspect that? How do you answer?

Respond clearly. "No, Gojo-sama. Apologies if I seem at all startled in any way. I am taking in my new surroundings," you replied with a slight incline of your head towards him.

Satoru's eyebrows raised a little. It was the first time he had ever heard your voice. As he suspected, it was graceful and beautiful, but still so sad. And what was with the honorifics? He waited a second for you to say something else, but nothing came. "Do you like it? The house that is." Satoru figured the only way to get anything out of you was to ask himself.

He asked you a question. Respond clearly. Tell him what he wishes."Yes, your home is beautiful Gojo-sama. I'm very fortunate to be living here as your wife." Your words sounded exactly the same, clipped and poised to perfection like the small smile you had on your face. Your skin was cold despite the amount of fabric that covered it, but you refused to shiver. You refused to tremble despite the fear you were feeling. Yes, you had trained and prepared yourself for this. You would be fine.

Satoru only cocked his head and crossed his legs, observing you like a painting from where he sat on the couch. "Thank you." His voice conveyed his usual charisma, but the look he was giving you did not. He sighed as you only bowed your head again and said nothing. He could tell you were afraid, you just didn't wish to admit it. Was it stubbornness or nervousness that had you standing like that before him, looking both strong and weak at the same time?

After a few moments, he spoke again, this time with a little more calmness and reassurance. "I don't bite, y'know." Not a word left your lips at that. You didn't even move. It was like he had a statue standing in a wedding dress in the middle of his foyer. Not a statue, a corpse, with unfeeling, empty eyes. Maybe you weren't happy with the current situation. "Did you like the reception? I'm sure you had input in the planning."

Take this chance to show your worth. "I planned the entire reception, Gojo-sama. I hope it was to your liking." You clasped your hands even tighter as you waited for his reaction.

Satoru raised his eyebrows. "Oh, wow. I'm sorry then, I'm sure you liked it because you put it all together. Well, uh, I definitely enjoyed it, and I'm sure everyone else did too. You did a great job. Uh, thank you," Satoru chuckled. He meant every word. Planning an event of that nature must have been a daunting task and you had done it all on your own. You must be pretty independent.

"Of course, Gojo-sama. It was my duty," you replied with another bow. The fear in your gut subsided at his words. It seemed he could be won over by acts of service.

Duty. That's when it clicked in Satoru's head. You saw this as 100% a duty. Well, it wasn't like he didn't see this arrangement as a duty too, but it had always been more than that to him. It was both a duty and an enjoyment. At least, that's what he hoped it would be for the both of you.

He said nothing for a few moments. You didn't move. He could tell by the uncomfortable silence that the household staff was probably listening from somewhere nearby. Perhaps that also made you uneasy. "Let's head somewhere more private," Satoru murmured, and stood from the couch.

Private? A chill ran down your spine that worsened when he made his way over to you. Were you both going to-

You remained silent as he took your arm gently and led you up the steps of the grand staircase. He moved slowly, watching and searching you for any indication of emotion or feeling, but you gave him none. He cleared his throat before speaking once more. "That outfit seems uncomfortable. I'm surprised you've been able to wear it all day."

Your mind was running circles around his words, but you didn't show it. Is he going to offer to take it off me? Why is he being so gentle with me? Where is he leading me? A bridal chamber? A bedroom? "It is not uncomfortable, just a little heavy," you responded, forcing yourself to keep your voice even. "The tailors did a fabulous job with it."

Satoru hummed and muttered his agreement. He would take this as slow as possible. He knew that the first thing he would have to do was make you comfortable. "I see. If you would like, you may change out of it, and I can take you on a tour of the rest of the estate. Or, you can sleep if you're tired."

This seems like a test, you thought. Which option would he prefer? "I can change and join you on a tour of the home," you responded. "If that is what you wish of me."

Not exactly the answer he was looking for, but an answer nonetheless. "Alright. I'll show you your bedroom. It's apart of my rooms of the estate. I hope that's alright," he said as he guided you towards a set of double doors down the hall.

Satoru stepped before you to open the doors himself, a few staff members walking out past. You assumed that they were finishing their cleaning for the night. You could tell a few of them looked at you as they passed, though you never looked up to meet their gaze.

You could tell these were Gojo's chambers, as they were decorated somewhat differently from the rest of the house. While the entire house had a more contemporary feel to it, his part of the estate added western styles to it: gray and white furnishing, an upstairs that led to an open second floor balcony overlooking the first floor living room space, comfortable carpeting, and a woodsy, homey scent. There was a dining area and billiards further to the right to entertain guests. Truly a home within a home.

Satoru led you up the stairs, watching as you looked over the second floor railing into the living room. When you reached the top, he gestured to the first door on the left. "This is my bedroom here, in case you ever need to find me," he said as he moved you two forward. "And this one is yours." He opened the next door over.

Satoru let you step into the room first. "I wasn't sure what you would prefer in terms of the color of the room and everything, so I had a few of my staff design it for me. Do you like it?" he asked, a slight guilt to his tone. He felt bad that he knew almost nothing about you. He didn't even know where to start when he began planning to incorporate you into his home, but he figured an inviting bedroom would be a start.

"Yes, very much so" you replied. The room was bigger than your one at the Kamo estate. The furniture was made of oak wood, with the room itself having accents in white and various shades of purple. The canopy bed was plush and had silk sheets. Most of your attention was drawn towards the bookshelf in one corner, which already had some of your books as well as many new ones. The closed curtains, which had little butterflies sown on them, had moonlight escaping into the room. The wall to the right had another door, which you assumed led to the bathroom and closet. "Thank you for arranging this for me, Gojo-sama."

You moved your gaze down as you turned to face him. "Of course," he chirped.

Silence once more.

He sighed audibly. "You're gonna hurt your neck if you keep looking down like that, pretty girl. Especially with that monstrosity on your head," he said softly as he approached you. You stilled, jumping a bit as Satoru reached his hands forward to grasp the top of the headpiece. "Shh, I'm not gonna hurt you, okay? Just taking it off for you," he murmured when he saw you tense up. He removed the headpiece gently, letting your hair fall. He resisted the urge to touch the soft locks upon seeing them unbound, and instead opted for setting the headpiece on a side table. "There. Feels a lot better, doesn't it?"

"Yes. Thank you, Gojo-sama." You still didn't look at him. After a pause you asked, "May I go change now?"

Why did you ask for permission? "Sure," he answered, a little confused as he watched you retreat into the bathroom. He stood awkwardly in the room as he heard you shuffle around behind the door. He sighed and leaned against the bed. What was it that had you so... uptight? Why wouldn't you relax?

Meanwhile, you made yourself busy undressing and slipping out of the heavy fabrics of your wedding garb in the bathroom, hanging up the piece and choosing a simple, flowing dress to change into. You looked into the mirror once more, and paused.

You had forgotten about the white lace lingerie your handmaidens had forced you into while dressing you this morning. A provoking technique, they had called it. It was beautiful, the entire ensemble having been comprised of silk and lace with little flowers adorning it, but you felt incredibly uncomfortable now that you saw yourself with it on. You felt more like a prized ham, wrapped up and ready to be eaten. And that is my responsibility tonight-

Your thoughts were broken by the sound of movement coming from the room. Right. He's still out there. You thought back to how he had taken off your headpiece. You couldn't help but be frightened for a moment, but then the way he removed it had been... gentle, as all his other actions toward you had been.

You were used to men like him: large, imposing sorcerers, with big egos and even bigger amounts of cursed energy. However, when any of those men came close to you, maybe even to just put a hand on your shoulder, their touch was also gentle, but not in the way Satoru was. They were gentle and domineering. Satoru had been both gentle and considerate.

But what he had called you...

It still felt like he was trying to get something out of you. And you didn't like it.

You slipped on the dress over the lingerie, letting the soft velvet material warm you as the skirt ended at your ankles. You had always liked this evening dress.

Satoru's head shot up when he heard the door click open. You stepped back into the room, ready to be led. Your apparel took him aback at first. He had expected you to choose something comfortable, a t-shirt and leggings at least, but you still came out dressed like you were going somewhere. You looked beautiful though, and he supposed it was nice to see you in something that wasn't clan-styled regalia (didn't matter that he was still wearing his outfit from today).

Satoru said nothing as you took his arm and let him lead you into the estate. Although he didn't look directly at you, he observed your movements. Beautifully robotic was the way he could best describe it. But why?

Then it dawned on him. The wedding had been ceremonial, so your actions there he could ignore, but everything after... it was like you were still in the ceremony, even in this moment. He saw it firsthand when you said your goodbyes to your family. You would be seeing them so much less now that you were married, yet neither of your parents nor siblings hugged you or expressed any emotion when sending you off.

Then finally with himself. You never looked at him. You complimented him at every opportunity. You asked for permission to go get dressed.

He could never get you to relax. To be comfortable. It was like you were being monitored by some invisible camera that he couldn't see and that you feared.

Duty. 100% a duty.

He looked down at you once more as you walked down the hallway, eyes trained ahead. Yes, those eyes had been his first sign, he realized. For what once held liveliness and curiosity in youth had been replaced with a senseless, dull husk of what he remembered.

Something had happened in those seven years since he last saw you. He felt sorry for you.

He felt sorry because he felt like this was somehow his fault.

But that wasn't going to stop him from trying to be the best he could to you.

___________________________________________________________

An hour later, Satoru had shown you about half of the estate, everything between recreational rooms, kitchens, dining rooms, and his own personal office. Yet, as he talked, you seemed disinterested, elsewhere.

The both of you were on the first floor, walking down a hallway with floor to ceiling windows on the left wall.

"There's not much left to show you, or at least anything that's interesting anyway. If there's anywhere else you'd like to..." Satoru's voice trailed off when he looked at you again, staring out of the windows as you passed.

There. You looked out the windows toward the estate garden, your eyes wide, glittering, and curious. He opened his mouth and then closed it. You looked like a little girl staring at a new doll in a toy store. Finally, something that he could read from you that you refused to hide. Wonder and interest.

Satoru stopped walking when the two of you reached a set of glass doors that led outside. "Do you want to see the garden?" he asked, almost chuckling when you nodded eagerly. "Let's go then." He opened one of the doors to let you through, watching you with amusement. You still kept your face neutral, hands folded over your chest as you stepped out into the open air before walking, practically running, over to the vast flower beds and trees across the lawn.

He just stared as you bursted with this sudden childlike excitement. So you can be won over somehow. Satoru laughed under his breath, a small smirk on his face as he went to join you. You started by walking between bushes, running your hands along any part of the plants as you could. He never would have guessed that you were interested in plants, but now that he thought about it, it made sense. He could see you being the type of girl that's interested in feminine things. Things like dresses, books, and maybe even chocolate desserts. Things like flowers.

You were kneeling next to a bush of blue hydrangeas as he approached. He thought you looked perfect like this, the moonlight playing off of your hair, skin, and dress while you ran your fingers along petals. However, when you realized he was getting closer, you quickly got up and returned to how you were in the foyer: standing straight, hands clasped, and head bowed. It stopped Satoru in his tracks, but also made him understand a little more of how you worked.

You must see a husband, him, as an authority figure that you have to please. Satoru didn't know why. Maybe your family pushed you to be a good wife, but now you're just taking it too far. You must be able to relax when you're comfortable, or when you're alone. That had to be it. Right now, you seem to view this place as comforting, so he had to be the same.

And if he seemed to make you feel uncomfortable, he would leave you alone.

But first, he had to try to get through to you.

"Do you like gardens?" Satoru asked, even though the answer was really fucking obvious.

"Yes, Gojo-sama," you replied. "I like flowers and plants. They are a great enjoyment of mine. Your garden is the most magnificent I have ever seen."

It was the best Satoru had ever seen too, but at this point, he couldn't tell if you were lying to him just to make him happy. He took a step closer and huffed a little. "Y'know... you don't have to call me that. I mean, I'm your husband, not the emperor," he chuckled, though he was dead serious. Laughing through it was the only way to show that he wasn't mad at you. "Why do you like flowers? Or these ones in particular?" He gestured to the bush that you had been admiring.

If you were nervous or scared, you didn't show it. You seemed to be pondering for a moment as you looked at the bush. "I... don't know. Flowers have interested me since I was a child. I used to keep up a garden at home."

A garden that you'll never get to take care of again, he realized. "Well, if you want or... if you need something to do, I can have someone show you where we keep our gardening supplies. You can do as much or as little as you like of course."

Your eyes lit up at the request. "That would be lovely, Gojo-" He could tell you were about to add the "-sama" at the end, but stopped yourself. He still smiled at the way that you seemed to beam in the current setting.

"What other things do you like? Do you have any hobbies?" Satoru asked, watching as you continued to run your hands along the plant.

"I like music," you stated.

"Really? You play any instruments?" He proceeded to raise his eyebrows as you listed a slew of different types that you knew how to play, though you added that piano was your favorite. "What else?"

"I like... cooking, and cats, and," you settled one of the hydrangeas in your hand, "the color blue."

Satoru hummed in response. He felt like he was getting somewhere. "Really? Well in that case, I guess I should've had your room be that color."

"Purple is still just as nice," you replied with a small smile. It was brief, but he could tell it was genuine. It took his breath away. It was almost embarrassing, this effect you were having on him.

"Yeah, I guess." Satoru dared to move a step closer to you. He could see you tense, and decided this was as far as he would get. Maybe now was the time to get some answers out of you. He watched your hand continue to rub the petals. "How do you feel about... all of this. Really."

"Your garden is dazzling-"

"No, I mean our... situation. Be honest with me," he said gently, but the way he worded it almost made it sound like he was pleading with you.

You paused before answering. Your hand stopped moving. "This marriage is just as important to me as it is to my father and the Kamo name. I will do right by him to ensure that it succeeds. And not just for him, but for you as well." Your tone was light and sophisticated, your voice sweet as can be, but it still felt fabricated. Rehearsed. Satoru wasn't buying it.

After a few moments, he decided to try something a little bold. "Look. I'm not your father, okay? And this isn't the Kamo estate. You don't have to be so... restrictive around me. I know this is, like, your first time ever talking to me, but I'm not some authoritarian." He almost regretted the words when he saw your guilty face. "But of course, that also means I'm not going to control the way you act. You can do whatever you want, say whatever you want. It's all fine by me." Silence again. "(Y/N)?"

You seemed... confused. Satoru spoke again. "Are you feeling alright? All I'm saying is I want you to be comfortable here. If that means... not interacting with me as much, then I get that."

Still nothing.

Satoru sighed. Maybe he needed to take a different approach. Maybe he just needed to leave you alone for a while. "If there is... anything else you want to see, I can show you. Otherwise, I'm going to go to bed. You can stay out here as long as you want..." he said softly. He began to turn away from you, listening for your movements as he started to walk inside. You only walked from your spot and moved further into the garden.

The halls echoed with the sound of his footsteps. That went... much differently than expected.

He thought back to fantasies he used have of what this night would look like: learning more about you, showing you around the estate, laughing with you until both of your stomachs went numb.

Kissing you for the first time in that garden, and, if you wanted it, carrying you back to his room in seconds.

But as he thought more about it, Satoru realized just how unlikely those scenarios would have been, especially with the current situation. He speculated that your behavior was a combination of your familial expectations, anxiety, and the fact that you were meeting him for the first time. Not to mention, he knew he wasn't the most approachable-looking person in the world.

This was going to take some time. He would let you get used to the house first, get used to seeing him and the other staff around. Then eventually, you might begin to open up to him once you felt safe.

Or you might not talk to him at all.

Satoru really hoped it didn't come to that.

___________________________________________________________

Some time ended up being much longer than what Satoru thought you would need. It had been a week since you last spoke, and you made no effort to approach him.

He did get some semblance of a routine you kept. You were definitely a busy body, always up and ready with a full breakfast waiting for him on the dining room table before he was up (although, since he had the following two weeks after the wedding off, he was sleeping in later than normal). By the time he was finished eating and getting ready for his day, you had gone halfway through your daily routine, which included cleaning and managing the state of almost every room in the whole building. Once that was finished, you prepared lunch, taking your portion out to the garden to eat. The rest of the day you used for your own recreation, usually something along the lines of taking walks, reading, or taking care of different parts of the garden. Of course, you still had time set aside to make him dinner before you stayed in your room for the rest of the night.

Just noticing the things you do throughout the day was a source of admiration from him alone. Satoru knew that the kind of work he did would be considered maddening and dangerous, yet he accomplished everything with ease. He couldn't help but think of you in the same light. You completed the same tasks everyday without fail or signs of fatigue (gods know he could barely clean a fucking toilet without gagging). He noticed that the meals you cooked were not just chosen randomly, but instead were meant to be perfectly balanced in terms of nutrition while still complimenting every bite he took. In other words, fucking delicious. Satoru knew he wasn't a bad cook either, but you made five star meals like it was no one's business.

He would see you often around the house, your skirts or dresses flowing as you flitted about. He could tell you favored modest clothing, usually in either knee to floor-length dresses, or blouses with skirts of the same length. Your makeup was simple, your hair always done up and clean.

Whenever he was close enough to you or entered a room you were in, you always bowed politely and addressed him, never saying more than was needed, before returning to whatever it was you were working on. Satoru knew if he asked, you would sit down and have a conversation with him or eat with him, but he wasn't going to push it. He wanted to be sure it was something you were okay with.

Yet hours and days dragged with almost no change. What was meant to be your two week honeymoon break passed, and Satoru had to return to his missions. Somehow you had already known what time he gets up to eat, and, just like almost any other day, there was a breakfast waiting for him.

No sign of the person who cooked it, though.

Satoru decided he couldn't take this anymore, the awkwardness and silence. No, he was going to find you and asked if you wanted to eat this breakfast with him.

Luckily, he found you in the kitchen putting away dishes you had just finished washing. "Good morning, (Y/N)," he said, trying to sound as polite as he could without frightening you.

You must have been lost in thought, because you jumped when he said your name and turned towards him.

Head bowed. Eyes down. Hands folded.

He was tired of it.

"Good morning, Gojo," you replied. "I hope you had a restful evening last night."

"I did..." he said. "I was just... wondering if you wanted to eat that delicious-looking breakfast you made with me. You're allowed to say no, of course." He felt stupid having to add that last bit.

"Apologies, Gojo, but I already took my breakfast this morning, but I sincerely appreciate your offer." He felt his stomach drop inside him a little. "Is there anything else I can get for you?"

"No, it's fine. I'll be home later tonight." He tried to keep his tone from sounding disappointed. He couldn't be mad at you for eating before he asked you. However, Satoru wanted to end the conversation positively, with something not so... stale. He turned to walk to the door, looking once more over his shoulder at where you still stood. He opened his mouth once, closed it, and then opened it again. "You look gorgeous today, by the way."

That surprised you. Not the words necessarily, nor the fact that these weren't your best clothes, but the way he said it. Like he meant it. It stirred something in you. You decided to look up at him, but he was already gone.

A while later, Satoru was dressed and ready to go, his car parked just outside with the AC blasting. He walked down the grand staircase... with you waiting for him at the bottom.

You were waiting for him. He paused in front of you once he reached the bottom of the steps. You had assumed your usually stance, but... he could tell you wanted to say something.

"I... realized that I never asked what you would like me to make for dinner for when you return..." you said as if you were just realizing that you were standing here, and you needed to make up an excuse.

It tugged at his heartstrings a bit. You had never asked if he had a preference for dinner, so... this was you trying to approach him to start a conversation. "Well, whatever you want to make is fine. You're such an amazing cook. I would never not eat anything you make," Satoru exclaimed with a small smile before leaning in a bit as if telling you a secret. "But, if I must request something, I reallyyy like mochi desserts," he whispered before pulling away. "But you didn't hear it from me."

Your small smile and barely noticeable laugh made his heart explode. Pride swelled in his chest. So you have a sense of humor in some regard...

He smiled and walked past you to the door, walking through before-

"Gojo," you called from across the room. Satoru turned at the sound of you calling his name.

"Have... have a nice day today..." you said, giving him a small bow.

His eyes widened in surprise before he flashed you a grin. "You too, pretty girl." And just like that, he left, the door shutting behind him.

Satoru was trying to do his best not to holler in excitement on the other side of the door. You went out of your way to meet him at the front door and ask what he wanted for dinner and told him to have a good day? He felt like a middle school girl. A stupid smile plastered itself on his face as he walked to his car.

And stayed for the rest of the day after.

___________________________________________________________

The next few weeks went just the same: him waking up to breakfast that you sometimes stopped by to eat a few bites of, you saying goodbye and asking what he wanted for dinner at the door, and him coming home to that meal in the evening, which you occasionally ate with him also.

Satoru felt pretty spoiled if he was being honest. He never liked those mysogynistic views on gender roles, especially when it came to the roles of a husband and wife, but he was now understanding the appeal. He had assured you a few times that you didn't need to have something home cooked and ready for him each time he came home, and that he was just as fine with takeout, but that never stopped you. He knew it was serious, if not a little concerning, when he asked for a three-tiered Danish cake for dessert as a joke and you had made two because you, in your words, got bored and had the time. He didn't even know he owned the cooking supplies needed to do that. Nevertheless, to say he ate most of that within a few days would be an understatement.

As time grew, Satoru had been able to observe you more closely. There were the normal things, like the type of books you liked to read (mostly poetry), what time you liked to take your walks (sometime between 3:00 and 6:00pm), and what days you went to the grocery store and farmers market (Wednesdays, if he's correct) despite household staff insisting to him to tell you to stop because it was technically their job. He could never find himself to do so.

Then there were a few... less fortunate things. You still don't look up at him, for starters, and your voice still retained that proper, unnatural tone. Besides the times where you say goodbye to him in the mornings, you always observe and never speak unless he speaks to you. You have a cell phone, but you almost never use it, so he assumed you probably have no friends that you contact, or even family that wanted to contact you for that matter. Lastly, among a few more things, you always try to sneak an ice pack from the fridge some nights when you think he can't see it in your hand as you walk back to your room with it. He never knew what it was for, until he saw it on your neck while you read in the library, something he had to peak through the doors to see.

You get neck pains because of the subservient posture you forced yourself to have around him, and Satoru started to think just how far back this training you had been given goes. He knew that you couldn't get neck pains from bowing if you've only been doing it for a month.

One day, he brought the situation up to Yaga as they watched some student sorcerers training out on the grounds. "You really don't know the kind of backwards training the Kamos put their girls through?" Yaga asked, fixing a stitch on one of his jujustu dolls. "I thought you knew what you were getting into, especially since you're in one of the clans yourself."

"Well, I'm starting to see it," Satoru says with a wince. "I just don't know how to get her to... relax, I guess. Act normal, y'know?"

"Do you think she even knows how?" Yaga mused. Satoru went still. "The Kamos are traditionalistic; their customs span all the way back to the Golden Age of Jujustu as a way to preserve the glory of that time period. This includes how they train their... females."

Satoru furrowed his brow. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I don't know much," Yaga said, a piece of the string in his mouth as he adjusted a stitch. "The kinds of things like how to please a husband, how to raise kids, how to behave around authority figures, which includes men. Weird stuff like that. And if (Y/N) is Arao Kamo's only daughter that was betrothed to marry the Six-Eyes wielding Gojo clan head, you can expect her to be well educated in that regard."

Satoru sighs. He felt stupid for not looking into that, for chalking it up to some kind of anxious defense when it was much more than that. "I'm a real fucking idiot."

"Yeah, well, while that may be true, there's not much you can do but give it time. With the kind of stuff she was brainwashed to believe, the least you can do is give her some patience," Yaga said, finishing up his patch.

"True, but that'll take forever," Satoru groans, looking out at the young sorcerers sparring. "She won't do anything unless I tell her to. She doesn't know what it's like to just... have some sort of free will."

"Then maybe show her what's like to have one," Yaga says with a groan, settling back into the bench they were sitting on.

There was a pause before Satoru chuckled. "This is the one time you've actually given me advice that I considered listening to."

"Good. You should, otherwise I'll send you on another mission from this weekend," Yaga grumbled.

"Fine, I'll listen."

___________________________________________________________

That next day, Satoru planned on asking you about something when he saw you before he left.

"Hey, pretty girl," he quipped with a smile as he walked down the stairs, enjoying the slight blush that formed on your cheeks, something he had noticed the past few times he called you that.

"Good morn-" your gentle words were cut off by a sudden cough and a sniffle that caught his attention. He stepped in front of you.

"Hey, are you alright? Is your throat okay?" he asked, his usual teasing tone replaced with one of concern.

You seemed to pause for a moment before speaking. "I'm alright. Something caught in my throat is-" You coughed again, this time more aggressively as you turned to cover it.

Satoru's brow furrowed. He gently pulled your chin so you could face him again. He felt your forehead with the back of his hand. "You're burning up, (Y/N). You probably have a fever."

"I can assure you, Gojo, I feel-" You gasped as you were suddenly lifted into his arms, his hands resting underneath your back and knees as he walked you back up the stairs. He smiled a little when he felt you throw your arms around his neck.

"Please don't lie to me, (Y/N). How long have you been feeling like this?" Satoru asked calmly as he carried you to your room. You looked down at the floor.

A pause. "About the past two days." Satoru sighed.

He opened the door to your room and set you down on the bed. "Hold tight, okay? I'm just going to go grab some things..." He left and returned a few minutes later with an ice pack wrapped in a towel, some medicine, and a glass of water.

Setting the items down on your bedside table, Satoru started by ripping two pills out of their packaging and handing them to you with the water. "Why have you been walking about like normal when you've been feeling this way for the past two days?"

You took a moment to take the pills before answering. "I am well enough to complete my usual routine, so I saw no need for rest. I had the staff prepare your meals to make sure you did not catch my illness," you replied weakly, trying not to cough.

Satoru shook his head. "But we have people hired here to do those tasks anyway. You still need to take care of yourself." Your brow furrowed.

"But I'm still-"

"Don''t fight me on this," Satoru butted in. You lowered your head, eyes despondent. "I don't mean to say I don't appreciate what you do every single day. Really, I really appreciate it. But I don't want you doing anything when you're clearly feeling like shit."

"My apologies-"

"Don't apologize. Please." Satoru's mouth tightened when he saw the ashamed look on your face, the way your shoulders caved slightly. He spoke again, this time more smoothly. "I'll call Yaga to cancel my appointments for today. Just let me take care of you... and don't feel bad about it. Okay?"

Satoru didn't care that he was almost begging with you, but he needed you to understand that that's all he really wanted right now. To take care of and cater to you for a change instead of you constantly doing so for him.

"But, you might get sick too..." His chest tightened a little at the guilt you displayed, your tone of voice, the slight whine in it.

"That's fine. Just means I don't have to go to work longer," Satoru chuckled, moving to sit on the edge of the bed next to your legs. "But don't think that's the only reason I'm here with you now, of course."

Your lips moved into a small, downturned smile as you huffed a laugh. You weren't even smiling in full, yet he thought it was the most beautiful thing in the world.

A sharp, painful sounding cough from you broke the silence. Satoru handed you the water again, propping another pillow behind your head. Once you finished, he took the water from you and handed you a woolen blanket that you had resting on the end of your bed. "I'll get some lozenges for your throat and some tissues. For now, just rest for me, okay? I'll come back to check on you, but if you need anything just yell. I'll be in my room," he said as he adjusted the ice pack onto your forehead.

"Okay," you whispered. You looked almost... stunned. Like you never expected this. It made Satoru sadder than he would like to admit.

After a few seconds, he stood, turned off the lights, and shut the door quietly. He walked away right before the sound of your soft cries reached the door.

___________________________________________________________

Satoru looked after you for the next two days, making sure you took medications and got proper rest. Even when you were well enough to get back on your feet, he still made your meals and brought you ice packs and popsicles at night for your throat.

He apologized the first few times he served you food, scratching the back of his head and laughing. Sure, his grilled cheese and tomato soup wasn't bad, but it was embarrassing compared to your culinary genius. You never replied, looking back at him with a perplexed expression.

Satoru noticed this, and he had his suspicions as to why you may be confused. Because you had been living with him for the past month and a half, he was able to easily discern what your looks meant, or at least, what he thought they meant. Your confusion was not necessarily because of actual confusion, but rather, because you weren't used to gestures like this. It was a little disheartening, of course, but slowly, you began to accept them with a small smile and nod of your head. It put him at ease to see you that way.

Now was the third day Satoru stayed home to be with you, and because you seemed to be doing much better, he knew this would probably be the last day he would have to do so. Thus so, he wanted to make the most of it.

It was early afternoon when Satory began to approach your room. You had taken to sleeping in while being sick, and if there was one thing he had definitely learned from this time with you, it's that you could sleep when you weren't waking yourself up at a certain time. He found it cute, and somewhat surprising.

He snuck into your room as you slept, gently placing the reason he came in on your bedside table: a vase, with those blue hydrangeas in it. And just as he was about to walk out, you called his name.

Satoru stilled and turned slowly. You were staring at the flowers on the bedside with a haphazard, exhausted look on your face. God, and just when he thought this moment couldn't get any more precious...

"Fuck, sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up. Goddamn, and I had it all planned out too! Having you wake up to flowers, I was just gonna get cracking on some blueberry pancakes and everything-"

"Oh... are we celebrating something?" you asked, looking between your hands and the flowers.

"No, 's just because. Unless there's something you want to celebrate? Happy your-fever-decreased-from-103-to-101 day?" he chuckled. "Anyway, I'm going to attempt to make pancakes even though I'm ass at it. Hope you're okay with Frosted Flakes as a fall-back option." Satoru turned towards the door again. This woman has him adding blueberries to his pancakes-

"Satoru...?"

He paused, stopped, buffered, restarted. Did you just call him Satoru? His brain was running laps around the replayed sound of your voice in his head as he turned. He was elated, estatic, down-right jolly, one might say.

And then all that was thrown out the window he faced you completely, and you were looking right at him.

Head up. Eyes bright. Smile... paragon.

"Thank you... for taking care of me."

Satoru knew you weren't just talking about this past three days. He felt like a five year old boy laying his eyes on you again for the first time as he, the ever so confident, swaggering, and teasing Gojo Satoru, flushed. "Yeah, no, it's no biggie, you deserve it cause you do so much and you're my wife so I kind of have to and-" he bumped into the door behind him, "fuck, you know what? I'm just gonna shut up and go... pancakes... haha, yeah..."

This poor man Satoru turned the corner and facepalmed, shutting your door behind him while your small laughs could be heard from the other side of the door. Running a hand through his hair, he tried his best to compose himself while he walked away, but then your face flashed in his mind again, and it was like he had a buzz that reached from his brain down to his whole body. He was smitten.

Once he reached the kitchen, soft music playing from his phone, he searched up that pancake recipe. While he began to get out ingredients, there was a knock as someone entered through the doors that led to the rest of the estate. One of the household staff.

"Sir, there's a guest at the front door," the woman stated.

"Who?" Satoru asked as he leaned over the counter while scrolling through the recipe.

"Arao Kamo, sir."

Fuck.

___________________________________________________________

tags: @leonora13x @cole-silas @feeiry @mysuperrainbow @tw0fvced @emptybrain01 @xixiwang @drilled-brain @lvieee @xxkoyukixx @we-loveebony @sereniteav @ilovecoyotepeterson10 @baby—vera @jebemticeluporodicu @louannfox

I love you guys

[unclewaynemunson]

'What's your favorite holiday?' Steve asked while they were looking at the fireworks, pressed against each other in the dark of the night. They had been dancing around each other for months, ever since Eddie woke up in the hospital with Steve already at his bedside. They had taken their time to get to know each other better, to let that something between them grow and to figure out what it all meant exactly. But around the time Eddie graduated, it had finally culminated into what it had been destined to be from the start.

Eddie could barely believe they had only been official for about a month and a half, that Steve had only been part of his life for a little over three months. But he knew, with a certainty that he couldn't really explain, that he and Steve belonged to be like this. No matter how scary it had been to fall for him, it had been the only available option.

'Sukkot,' Eddie answered his question with no hesitation.

Steve leaned away a little bit to be able to look at Eddie.

'Was that the one that was, like, three weeks ago?'

'No, that was Shavu'ot,' Eddie answered patiently. He knew that Steve was trying very hard to keep up, and that the Hebrew words didn't exactly make it easier on him. 'The boring one that Wayne's obsessed with.'

Steve chuckled. 'So what is Sukkot?'

'I thought you'd never ask, big boy,' said Eddie, a wide grin creeping over his face. 'It's the best fucking week of the year. We build those huts in our yards where we're supposed to live all week. It's really awesome, we get to be outside all the time and Wayne tells all the best stories about how our ancestors escaped from Egypt and wandered through the desert for years. Back in Virginia, on the farm, it also used to be this celebration that the harvest was done. The best moment of the year, man, like when the summer holiday starts, y'know.'

'Sounds pretty cool.'

'Pretty cool?' Eddie repeated in a mock-offended tone. 'Pretty cool?! Stevie, how dare you, it's fucking magical! It's the awesomest of holidays! You know what? You're gonna have to join us this October and get the whole experience!'

'Are you sure?' Steve looked weirdly hesitant about Eddie's proposal and Eddie felt the excitement in his chest deflate like a popped balloon.

'Yeah, I mean... If you want to,' he said, reigning himself in a little bit. Maybe Steve thought it was weird, maybe he would never quite understand it, maybe –

'Of course I want to,' Steve cut off his spiraling thoughts, like the mere suggestion was completely ridiculous. 'But would it be okay? You wouldn't mind? And your uncle?'

'Why the hell would we mind, Stevie?'

'Well, I'm not Jewish...'

Eddie chortled. 'Yeah, we know that, dude. But you're always welcome in our humble little home.'

And Steve's face lit up in a way that the fireworks in the sky above them could never compete with. 'Alright,' he said. 'Then I'd love to celebrate this awesomest of holidays with you.'

******

And so it happens that a little over three months later, Eddie runs out of the trailer with even more excitement than usual when Steve's way too fancy car shows up. He basically jumps into his boyfriend's arms as soon as Steve gets out of his car – and of course Steve catches him, stumbling only a little bit while huffing out an “oomph” as Eddie wraps all four of his limbs around his body.

'Hello to you, too,' he murmurs with a soft smile on his face. He can't exactly kiss Eddie here, in broad daylight with all of Eddie's neighbors to see, but he lets his hands linger around Eddie's shoulders when he gently puts him down on the ground.

'You're excited.'

'We're building the hut today!'

'The sukkot, right?'

And the proud smile around Steve's lips makes it almost impossible for Eddie to correct him.

'The sukkah, babe. It's one sukkah, multiple sukkot.'

'Sukkah,' Steve repeats, his voice still as unsure as ever when he tries the Hebrew words that are so familiar to Eddie and Wayne and still so foreign to him.

'C'mon, Wayne's already waiting for us.'

Eddie starts tugging Steve along with him towards the trailer. He wishes he could do that by taking his hand instead of the sleeve of his jacket, but he's too aware of how careful they have to be here, out in the open in the trailer park.

They go around the trailer, where Wayne is already surrounded by a bunch of corrugated sheets and some big pine branches.

'We're building it here?' Steve sounds surprised. 'Why not on the porch?'

Eddie sees his uncle's face fall, and his own excited smile fades away as well.

'It's too eye-catching, on the other side,' Wayne explains to Steve. 'Too many folks lookin' to trash stuff 'round here, ya know.'

Almost every year, they find some graffiti on the walls of their sukkah at some point of the week. It has become better since they moved the hut to the backside of their trailer, hidden away from Forest Hills' main roads. Before, when they still built it in front of their home, they'd regularly find the roof or the walls demolished. Nothing ever happened when one of them was home: both Wayne and Eddie were protected from any serious danger by their own scary looks. But unfortunately, the sukkah did not enjoy the same protection when the Munson men weren't present to keep an eye on it.

Wayne doesn't outright say it with that many words – that's not his style – but Eddie can see in the arch of Steve's eyebrows that he gets it. That he understands that Forest Hills is not the kind of place where Hebrew should be spoken loudly and that anything more than a menorah in front of a window can be considered offensive real quick. He sees that Steve understands it, because Steve knows what it feels like to not be able to take his boyfriend's hand when they're outside. It's not the same, but it's similar, in a way.

When Eddie came out to Wayne, his uncle told him that he was sorry Eddie got dealt the wrong cards twice. But that's not how Eddie sees it. Standing here, in the quiet world behind the trailer, with his uncle, his boyfriend and a pile of junk that will soon turn into a refuge, he gets the confirmation of what he already knew back then: that he wouldn't have it any other way. Even if it means having to hide away from prejudiced eyes, he'd choose this right here over anything easier in a heartbeat.

Wayne takes off his trucker hat to reveal the kippah he often wears hidden underneath it, then turns Eddie around by his shoulders so he can attach a kippah to his curls with some hairpins. Eddie usually never wears one: he doesn't like being told what to do in any way, and he proudly wears the pentagram of the Church of Satan on his denim vest. But for events like this, Wayne insists the kippah is important, and Eddie has long since he moved in with his uncle learned that there's no use digging his heels in the sand about it. If it's that important for Uncle Wayne, he'll doesn't mind complying.

'And one for you,' Wayne states after Eddie's kippah is properly secured to his head, turning towards Steve with a third one in his outstretched hand.

Steve's eyes widen in an almost cartoon-like way.

'For me?' he repeats, as if he's unsure if he understands Wayne correctly.

'U-huh,' Wayne confirms with a nod of his head.

Steve's eyes flash back and forth between Eddie and Wayne, still clearly confused, like he's trying to catch some lie or a prank between the two of them.

'That's – would that be okay?' he stammers.

'Neshama sheli,' Eddie says, his voice soft. 'Of course that'd be okay. It's the polite thing to do, actually, when you're in shul – or in other Jewish places – whether you're a Jew or not.'

'Okay, cool,' Steve says with a little shrug of his shoulders. He's slightly too obviously trying to play it cool, and that makes Eddie realize something he hadn't really considered before: that Steve is nervous about this. For Eddie, sukkot is nothing but a holiday of fun. But Steve doesn't know any of those traditions, he doesn't know any of the unwritten rules. For all he knows, what they're doing today is something sacred and solemn – it makes sense that he's afraid to do the wrong thing or mess it up somehow. It's written all over his face: he's afraid to be disrespectful, to be an intruder, to somehow offend Wayne and Eddie without meaning to...

Steve takes the kippah from Wayne and places it on his hair, where it lies dangerously close to sliding off.

'Here, lemme help you.' Eddie digs around in his own pockets to find some long forgotten hairpins and slides up behind Steve, attaching the kippah to some strands of his soft, shiny hair. When he's done, he slides his arms around Steve's waist and tugs him close to his chest.

'Hey,' he whispers in his ear, nuzzling his nose against the soft hair right above it because he simply can't resist the temptation of touching Steve's locks in any way, ever. 'You don't need to worry 'bout anything. We're just gonna build a hut, that's all. And we're trailer park Jews anyway, we don't care about etiquette and shit. Or, well, maybe Wayne does, a little bit, but he's used to me, so... You're good.'

Steve chuckles, then turns himself around in Eddie's arms until they're face-to-face.

'Thank you,' he whispers in the space between them.

Wayne emphatically clears his throat, no doubt worried that the boys are about to forget he's still with them.

'You lovebirds ready to get to work?'

Slightly unwilling, Eddie lets go of Steve and flashes Wayne an excited grin. 'Alright, my dearest uncle, tell us what to do.'

The next hour or so is spent hauling corrugated sheets around and assembling them into a decent-sized hut. While Eddie is drilling their metal walls together, Wayne tells Steve all about the meaning behind what they're doing. He gets like that with every holiday: he loves the big stories, and Eddie has always loved listening to Wayne telling them.

'All of this,' Wayne explains with a gesture towards the half-finished sukkah, 'Is to remind us of what happened to our people a long time ago. They were enslaved in Egypt, far away from their homes. When they got out, they wandered through the desert for forty years, tryin' to find their way back. They suffered drought, storms, heat, famine... But G-d's protection was with them every step of their way, until He safely delivered them back to their homeland. For forty years, they didn't have no place to call home. They slept in huts beneath the stars. That's why, for one week a year, we still live in huts. We don't sleep here, 's too cold for that in Indiana –'

'I do sometimes,' Eddie cuts in.

'Your boy is crazy,' Wayne dryly states. 'But we live here as much as possible. The most important thing is to have all our meals in here, as long as it ain't raining too hard. We're not supposed to make a solid roof, y'know, 'cause it's supposed to be a reminder of how our people used to sleep under the open sky. It's a symbol for how we should submit ourselves to G-d's protection.'

Steve listens attentively and keeps asking Wayne all kinds of questions while they continue working on the roof, which they assemble out of pine branches that Eddie and Wayne took from the woods around the trailer park earlier that day.

'This day's extra special,' Wayne tells Steve when they're almost done, 'Cause it's a Friday evening. Means our first meal in the sukkah is a Shabbat meal.'

Usually, Wayne isn't exactly world's most diligent cook, but for days like this, he always tries to go a little bit bigger than usual. Not that their kitchen is suited for fabricating any kind of fancy meals – let alone that they can afford anything like that – but that doesn't really matter. Not to Eddie, at least, and he's pretty sure the same thing applies to Steve. The most important thing is that Wayne tries his very best to make days like those feel special. So while Steve and Eddie get tasked with setting up the interior of the sukkah, Wayne heads back to the trailer to make sure the food will be all done before sunset.

Steve and Eddie haul a bunch of plastic lawn chairs and a trestle table inside. After the furniture, they add some pillows, a truly hideous tablecloth, and a bunch of random clutter from the trailer to make it feel more homely. Eddie always likes to put this one Jesus sculpture they once got from the old Mrs. Brooks from number 70 in one of the corners, for no other purpose than to get on Wayne's nerves. Steve, on the other hand, actually cares about making the sukkah look good, and he comes up with the idea to walk around the trailer park and go into the woods to find some flowers as a finishing touch. Most of the vegetation around Forest Hills is withered all year round, but Steve manages to find some branches with beautiful autumn colors and a bunch of shiny chestnuts among the decaying junk.

'You manage to make anything pretty, huh,' Eddie notes when they're all done, with leaves of dark orange and golden yellow miraculously brightening up every single corner of the hut.

Steve smiles and pulls Eddie in his arms. Now, shielded by the walls of their dwelling, they can do that without worrying about the watchful eyes of nosy neighbors.

'Nah,' he murmurs, his lips ghosting over Eddie's cheek. 'I don't make things pretty, I attract pretty things.' And the way in which Steve's lips find his, soft and full of promise, tells Eddie that he wasn't merely talking about pretty things. It makes his heartbeat stutter and his cheeks heat up.

Steve pulls back before the kiss can become anything more than a promise, with a sparkle in his eyes and a soft smile still tugging at his lips.

'C'mon, let's go help your uncle with the food.'

By the time they're ready to welcome Shabbat, the autumn sun has long disappeared behind the trees and it's rapidly cooling off outside. Wayne puts on his thick plaid jacket and Steve borrows one of Eddie's favorite black hoodies. During this time of the year – when it's not yet cold enough to waste money on heating – the trailer doesn't really stay much warmer than the sukkah, so they're used to the cold anyway. Steve, however, is shamelessly exploiting the chill of the evening as an excuse to cuddle up close to Eddie at the table – not that Eddie minds that at all.

But when Wayne lights the candle and recites the blessing at sundown, it feels like the sukkah is actually much warmer than any other place in the world. It's because what's happening in this place is special, Eddie thinks. For a week, this hut is their home. It's designed to house two people – just Wayne and him – but Steve fits in this cramped space with them like he was always supposed to be here. And when Steve turns to Eddie to wish him a good shabbos with a smile on his face, Eddie knows that he will never want to celebrate another holiday – Jewish or not – without him.

Some fun facts for those who are interested: Sukkot 1986 indeed started on a Friday (October 17th) The use of corrugated sheets for a sukkah is actually quite common, and I took the liberty to interpret the skillful way in which we see Eddie drilling them down in the Upside Down, as him having plenty experience with creating a refuge with those things. For those who don't speak Hebrew: when Eddie calls Steve neshama sheli, he uses a common Hebrew pet name which literally translates to "my soul." I imagine Eddie loves calling Steve all kinds of Hebrew pet names and this is a truly beautiful one imo. I hope I did right to this really cool holiday with my lil story!

[half-oz-eddie]

Billy was a terrible kisser.

Well, no, maybe not...terrible.

The first time Billy kissed Steve was very "heat of the moment," at a party leading to a one night stand, which became a two night stand...then three, and then Billy was spending the night, telling Steve all his secrets, showing him the bruises on his back and all the places his bones were once fractured, but healed.

Then, the next thing Steve knew it, Billy was his boyfriend.

But the way he kissed him, while it was hot and passionate, it was also a little too hot, too aggressive, too sexual.

It was always hard and poured on thick, never soft and peppered.

It was always Steve initiating a kiss, and Billy grabbing the back of his neck and sticking his tongue down his throat.

Which wasn't the worst thing in the world, but he had one way of kissing, and they all (supposedly) meant different things.

Steve simply couldn't tell. He needed to figure this out.

He walked up to Billy while he was making a sandwich. "Kiss me." He demanded. "Like you love me."

Billy grinned, wordlessly pulling Steve into his arms and grasping the back of his neck, initiating a sloppy, opened mouth, tongue dancing kiss.

Steve slowly broke away, sighing.

"What happened?" Billy asked.

"Billy," Steve began. "Do you ever like...being gentle?"

He laughed in response. "I'm not a pussy, Steve."

"No, I don't mean—ugh, okay. I just...don't you ever want to go a little slow? Maybe kiss a little bit softer? Feel butterflies and—"

"Nah." He shook his head. I don't like that. I don't like that at all."

"How come? What's wrong with us being a little soft with each other?"

"It, uh...sounds a little cheesy, y'know? That only happens in movies."

"No it doesn't." Steve argued. "I wanna kiss you like that all the time, but then you yoke me up and start kissing me like you're horny."

"I'm passionate. I thought you said you liked that." Billy frowned.

"I do! But I just...love you so much, I wanna show it a little differently."

Billy sighed, slightly annoyed. "Different how?"

"C'mere. Let me show you."

They stood dangerously close to one another. Steve gently moved a lock of hair out of Billy's face, lovingly gazing into Billy's eyes.

"You're beautiful." Steve whispered.

Billy's eyes skittishly danced around,averting Steve's. "J-just shut up and kiss me. Stop all this talking."

"What's the rush? You worried about your sandwich?" He leaned in halfway.

"No, but you're wasting time."

"Time with you's never time wasted."

Billy's heart was starting to race. He was feeling nauseous—no, not nauseous. He was getting that stupid fluttery feeling in his stomach. What was Steve trying to do to him, anyway?

"I-I get it. You can stop now."

Steve's brows furrowed. "I haven't even kissed you yet."

"Just get it over with already, then."

"Are you mad at me?"

"I—No! I just feel weird."

"Relax, baby. You're in good hands." Steve spoke softly, his voice smooth like butter.

He continued to close the distance between them, their lips meeting slowly and gently, as if they'd never met before.

Billy felt himself melting into the kiss, his eyes fluttering shut as Steve led him.

Their hands instinctively found one another's, intertwining as they lovingly kissed.

Billy's heart raced, faster and faster. How could something so slow make his heart beat like this?

Steve deepened the kiss, just slightly, their tongues playfully flicking at one another's, causing Billy to gasp as he found himself getting lost in the moment.

He felt so loved, so wanted, and so deeply desired. It spoke even louder than the excited kisses they'd shared before.

They parted after what felt like forever, but still too soon, and gazed into each other's eyes.

"How was that? Was that too cheesy?"

Billy shook his head. "No, that was...do it again."

Steve smiled. "What about your sandwich?"

"Fuck the sandwich. I'll make another one if I have to."

"How about we take this to the bedroom, then?" Steve suggested. "There are so many other ways I can show you I love you."

Billy licked his lips and smiled. "Yeah?"

"Oh yeah." Steve took Billy's hand and led him upstairs, eager to show Billy that a little softness goes a long way.

@dragonflylady77 @adelacreations @shieldofiron @hunnysfwart @bigdumbbambieyes @harringroveera Happy Valentine's Day~

[gaycrittercentral]

Welp it’s not Halloween anymore (and actually these pictures are from last year hkkhljhl) but who give a shit y'all wanna see my goofy lil Sam costume :D if you were here for my Halloween stream then you already saw this but if not then LOOKIT MY SUIT BOY

Fun fact, I made all this last year and meant to post it then but I was just too lazy whoops. So I'm tryin to do better this time around, lmaoooo. Anyway yeah! Samb costume!! If you wanna hear how I made some of the elements for this and gathered up the rest, feel free to check out my ramblings under the cut :Dc

This was such a fun project. A lot of elements were of course just staples of businesswear, like I found the suit jacket at H&M and the pants at Target (and hemmed them because I love men's pants but they don't love my short-ass legs), but some parts were a bit more complicated. The hat, for example, I also found at Target, but it had the wrong kind of band, so I just took that off and hand sewed on a length of wide black ribbon in its place. I ain't no milliner or haberdasher or what have you but I feel like it came out pretty ok! And the ears were an element that I figured would be a fun addition lol, they are made of fleece I believe? I forget. I gave them a bit of soft stuffing so they're basically two soft pillows, and then safety-pinned them into the inner brim of the hat--that way I can look like a normal person if I ever decide to wear the hat in public lmao.

The tie was an absolute delight to work on. And also torture. Y'know, kind of a 'why not both' moment. I ended up reverse engineering a tie I already had and cannibalizing its inner fabric to make the new one, since I knew I wasn't going to wear the original. The new tie is made with a silky blue fabric that isn't silk that I don't remember what it is because I have a sponge for a brain. Sorry ^^; But basically I replaced the original outer part of the tie with my new fabric and sewed her up by hand (it's not really a machine job as far as I can tell), then painted on the stripes with watered down black fabric paint. I had hoped that watering it down would prevent it from making the fabric stiff, but that didn't end up working because it required so many layers to be opaque, oof. There's probably better ways to go about it, so if you're making your own Sam tie it's worth it to do some more research! Plus, they do sell regular blue ties out there that you could paint. I'm just insane. And tbh I wish I had just bought one but at least I can say I've made a tie now lmaoooo

And I suppose the last element of this is the paper bag Max puppet! I love him so dearly, he was a delight to make ^^ I'd tell you how to make him but why do that when obviously I learned from the original? Make sure to put one in your car ok it's really important

God I love this comic. And I also dearly dearly love how faithfully they adapted it in the cartoon <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

Anyway that's it that's all I got!! Also because I've never worn this thing out of the house it doesn't have shoes to go with, I just got some brown socks. I figure it fits with Sam as a shoe-hating person lmaooo. ok that's all bye thanks for looking hope y'all had a happy Halloween!!!!

[angelcakestarlet]

salvatore part 3.0

richie jerimovich x reader

warnings: age gap, cheating (eventually) (guys it's for the plot i swear), drugs mentioned, swearing.

guys this part is gonna be divided into two bc it didn't fit into one post :< they've been posted at the same time, u can find part 3.5 on my acc! thanks 4 all the love cuties <3

most people would call richie an asshole, it was just his nature y'know? how he walked around with that smirk you couldn't wipe off his face, fucking with cousin, trying to 'man the ship' and take control with his abrasive voice and attitude. after you got hired at the beef though, everyone wondered to what extent of an asshole richie really was. carmy and tina were on his ass the most, gifting him a quick smack on the shoulder or upside the head whenever they caught him staring at you, eyes trailing you out the door. they knew he could be an asshole, obviously, but they wondered if he was really the type of guy to take one look at your gleaming eyes and full cheeks and not be able to help himself. everyone in the kitchen called you 'baby', there was no avoiding how obviously young you were. richie knew, of course he knew, the way you looked up at him through your long lashes. the bags under your eyes nowhere near as dark and deep as his or carmy's. you were achingly sweet, and it killed him. when you smiled at him, bidding him his daily 'good morning, richie!' he felt his teeth rot in his mouth. like he wanted to store you away in his pocket and never let anyone ruin that sparkle you held behind your eyes. yet at the same time, if it was up to him, he could be the one to do it. a reminder he felt every time he played with the ring on his left hand. god, he could ruin your life if you let him. it's not like actively wanted to, but whenever he caught a glimpse of the sun hitting your soft skin he felt something intangible. so when you came up behind the alley and sat next to him on your first day, and he saw the way your glossed lips wrapped around his cigarette he knew he couldn't help himself, he wouldn't. he saw it that day, a part of you is sick enough to want this too. from that point on, you play along. his sweet names for you, soft touches, like he wanted to guide you, teach you. 

"tell baby she can't be ringing in the orders all at once, cousin!" carmy yelled over at richie through the expo. "well maybe if you picked up the pace, did the damn system the way it's meant to be done you'd get it done, cousin." richie yells back rolling his eyes, he was being stubborn about all of carmen's new 'rules'. "just tell her, asshole!". richie threw his hands up, exiting the kitchen to find you ringing in orders on the new tablet that only you can seem to figure out. he comes up beside you, gently pulling your hand off the screen. you turn, recognizing richie's strong cigarette and minty aroma. "cousin's being a little bitch so i'm just gonna need you to slow down on ringing in orders. alright, sweetheart?" he nods his head towards you. "oh shit, i'm sorry richie i forgot you guys were short staffed today! if you want i can help back there-" richie chuckles at you stumbling over your words. "no no, don't worry about it, doll. you keep your pretty little self up here-" he grabs your shoulders facing you back towards your tables, "and let me worry about what's going on back there". you let out a small laugh and agree, feeling his big hands gripping your shoulders. "keep raking in those tips, baby!" he yells back as he makes his way back into the kitchen. "yo, you told her, cousin?" carmy questions as richie walks back into the hectic kitchen. "yeah fuck off, she's doing great out there. that face brings in the big bucks man" sydney throws her head back at his words, "richie you can't be saying that! i think even the way you look at her is an HR violation." "syd, fuck off, i am HR" he responds with a cocky tone making sydney roll her eyes.

it was a few days after the day of the game, and the little show richie put on to protect you from some drunk asshole. he had laughed to himself the entire way home, imagining your 'boyfriend' picking you up that night. and every night after work as a matter of fact. how you'd go home to him and lay in bed thinking about richie. his hands, the scruff on his face, the shadow his figure casted over you when he stood behind you, the way his gaze imprinted on you, and the way his voice changed when directed towards you. richie could always clock the want in your eyes, almost like you would surrender yourself to whatever would fall from his mouth. finding out about your boyfriend just confirmed his suspicions; you were just the type of girl who's looking for someone to take good care of her. 

it was the following friday night after a particularly stressful shift at the beef (when wasn't it) and tina had rounded everyone up, convincing everyone to head to the bar. "ugh, but tina i'm all sweaty" you frowned, always wanting to head out looking your best. "baby throw on a dress and some lipstick and i promise you'll look just fine, mija." she came up to you, reaching up to flatten your fly aways with her small hands. "plus who you trying to look good for anyways, richie?" she laughed but then quickly noticed your red face and paused. "what?" you asked slowly with a nervous tinge. "don't tell me you got the hots for richie, girl." she looked at you, eyebrows as crinkled as ever. after your lack of response she let out a long sig, "ay no, niña. i love that boy, i really do but he is bad news. plus baby he's too old for you, my god, and you're too pretty. no no no you stay away from him." she ranted on before you could even get a word in. "no, tina! i don't, I promise!" you exclaimed, she stared unconvinced, "plus i've got a boyfriend". "hmmm, okay, i'm watching you girl. go get ready." her tone still sounded unconvinced, just a bit more at ease knowing you're at least 'taken'. you quickly composed yourself in the dim fluorescent's of the beef's bathroom as everyone made their way to the bar. slapping on some lipstick, your hoops, and trying to manage as much of your hair as you could. "wepa!! look at you, come on let's go before everyone gets drunk by the time we get there" tina pulls you off into her car. 

pt 3.5 up now!!

[the-amazing-animated-circus]

Thought I'd share my first drafts of all the characters!

Don't know what I was thinking with the braces on Caine, lol. I guess i just wanted a way to connect his upper and lower jaw.

Zooble was BY FAR the most difficult to design, since they're already so insanely cartoony. I actually tried making them a robot at one point!

I settled with a devil because a lot of old cartoons would have stuff like devils as their antagonist, and I didn't think that a robot would fit the era of animation I was going for.

An alternate colour scheme for Zooble. It was way too generic in my opinion.

Looks like they were also meant to have whiskers at some point.

The first ever sketches I did for this au!

The pose in the middle was inspired by a Christma comic I was going to make as an introduction to the au. Create some intrigue, y'know?

I've definitely had the most fun drawing caine's expressions!

More caine!

I focused a lot less on keeping entirely to proportions and more on the line of action, akin to the rubberhose style of animation.

First sketches of Jax and Ragatha. I love drawing anthropomorphic charcters, so Jax was naturally my second choice to draw!

I then played around with all the possible hairstyles Ragatha could have. I didn't want the design to be too similar to other aus, while also conveying her kind demeanor. A lot of aus end up tying her hair back!

More Caine! again, the one in the middle is a pose I would have used for the Christmas comic! I was still figuring out how many restrictions the toons would have, so I'm glad I scrapped it. Wouldn't want to set anything in stone that early in development.

Some other poses for the early designs of the characters! Jax was definitely my favourite of these!

I never went for Kinger's upside down cross because I'm pretty certain that an animation studio in the 50s wouldn't allow a symbol of Satan on a character that wasn't pure evil.

That's it! I hope the next time we meet, I have some new work to show you!

[silantryoo]

non-idol!yu jimin x itzy!reader (fluff)

WARNINGS ; alcohol consumption, (past) toxic relationships, idol parties, idol industry, making out

yu jimin was never fond of the spotlight.

despite your many many attempts to get your childhood friend to join the industry, jimin had watched your struggles firsthand. the extreme dieting, the intense schedules... she just couldn't bring herself to enter an industry that prioritized her looks over her ability to perform.

(at least jimin knew she'd thrive in an industry like that.)

she eventually convinced you to stop the very insistent remarks about joining some big three company (which you knew she'd make it into at least one if not all) and preferred watching off stage.

she watched you go on world tours and sell out arenas, always somewhere in the crowd. she always made sure to cheer as loud as she could, even if that meant losing her voice the next day. jimin would buy every single one of your albums, even if she never really bothered to look at them. she knew if it wasn't for her intership, then she would be just another broke kpop fan.

jimin had always been a supportive best friend, and she hated that it was all you could see in her.

jimin sighed, drying her hair as she heard her phone ring on the counter.

she rolled her eyes. it was most likely minjeong. the girl was definitely asking for the notes that she had missed earlier. jimin never understood why the younger girl decided to join the student council when she already hated it in high school.

jimin picked up the phone, towel still in hand. "you could've just texted me, y'know?"

"jimin-unnie."

jimin looked at her phone, walking to the hamper to throw her dirty towel away.

ITZY Shin Ryujin

she brought the phone back up to her ear.

"ryujinnie?" jimin furrowed her eyebrows, looking at the clock in front of her. "why are you calling me? it's twelve in the morning."

jimin waited, hearing loud chatter on the other side. she figured that you guys were most likely at a party. it was close to new years after all.

"can you pick y/n up?" ryujin's voice came through.

"what?" the older girl could feel worry bubbling up in her stomach. "what's wrong?"

her brain couldn't help but think of anything and everything that could've possibly gone wrong.

"she's fine. it's just..." the idol reassured, biting her tongue as she spoke quietly. "yunjin-ssi is here."

"yunjin?" jimin blinked. maybe she was just hearing things. "huh yunjin?"

"yes," ryujin strained. "*huh *yunjin."

huh yunjin.

she was a girl that you knew well (a bit too well if jimin had any say in it). yunjin was someone who you fell in love with, one you shared fleeting kisses and warm meals with. she was someone that made you feel like nothing mattered, that it was only you two.

she was also the same person who had cheated on you the exact second she had an opportunity to.

jimin set her phone down and put it on speaker. "where are you guys?"

"we're at minnie-sunbae's mansion thing." ryujin said. jimin looked at her phone, wondering how she was supposed to know where that was. she grabbed a brush as she listened to ryujin speak.

"where is this place?" the university student heard ryujin mutter.

jimin continued to brush her hair.

"who is that?"

she set the brush down, quickly putting on her glasses. she hurried to the door.

"jimin-unnie."

jimin could hear rustling as she put on her shoes. "jimin."

"jisu." she grabbed her phone, bringing it closer to her. "is she okay?"

"she's throwing up in the bathroom. yeji's with her" jisu sighed. "you don't have to pick her up. we'll just go home early."

faintly, jimin could make out a voice. "i *just *talked to yujin."

"yuna, stop." jisu scolded, earning a groan from the youngest. "you can talk to her next time."

"it's okay." jimin muttered. "i don't mind."

especially if i get to see y/n, she thought to herself.

jisu spoke after a beat of silence. "you sure?"

"yeah." jimin stood up, grabbing her keys from the counter. "just send me the address."

"okay." the idol replied as jimin's phone pinged, grabbing the girl's attention. "i'm sorry for making you do this."

jimin shrugged. "i don't mind."

she looked closely at the address, her eyes widening after she realized what area of the city she had to go to.

"exactly." jisu muttered. "i'm sorry."

jimin sighed, listening as the line hung dead.

yu jimin was never fond of the spotlight, but she'd do anything for you.

jimin has been to a college party before.

was it one of uchinaga aeri's many parties? yes. did she get dragged by her roommate, ning yizhuo, despite the fact she had an entire project due the next day? unfortunately. did she even drink at all, or was jimin too busy texting you? she preferred not to answer.

still, jimin had never seen a party this extravagant, and everyone knew that aeri was loaded with money.

the college girl pulled up in front of the house. the entire street full of cars that definitely outshined her black sedan, even if it was the latest one that was released.

she turned off the ignition, hopping out of the car. looking at the building in front of her. somehow, the entire building was bigger than the main hall at SNU.

taking a deep breath, she walked towards the door, only to be stopped by a bouncer (they even had a bouncer?).

the tall man put his arm out, blocking jimin from entering.

"can i–"

he looked jimin up and down, the college girl suddenly feeling conscious about the way she dressed.

she didn't look too out of place with everyone. everything she was wearing was expensive, even her SNU hat that somehow cost an entire week's worth of groceries.

"no commoners allowed."

jimin's eyes widened. "commoners?"

the bouncer rolled his eyes. "non-idols."

jimin bit back a scoff. she wasn't a person who would aggress in these types of situations, even if she wanted to (and she really wanted to right now).

"right. of course." the college girl clenched her jaw. she looked inside, briefly meeting eyes with the devil herself before the bouncer blocked her view. "if you could please just let me in, i just need to find my friend."

before yunjin manages to ruin her life even more.

"your idol friend?" the man chuckled. he looked her up and down once more. "yeah, okay."

she took a deep breath in, stepping back slightly. she needed to collect her thoughts one way or another. she just knew that she needed to reach you before you end up drinking yourself into a coma.

jimin looked around the building, wondering if every access point was guarded somehow.

the guard squinted, his eyes trained on the girl.

"hey." they heard a voice say. the two turned around, finding a male idol smiling at jimin. "what took you so long?"

aside from looking like yeji, jimin had no clue who he was.

she smiled back. "hi?"

"she's with me." the yeji lookalike said. jimin smiled at him, locking eyes with the guard as she walked in.

she followed him in, but kept a safe distance, ready to break away if she either saw you or any one of the ITZY members. jimin had no clue who this guy was but if this place was anything like a college party, she was on high alert.

"yeji told me to get you." the guy in front of her told her, yelling over the music. jimin felt a sense of relief wash over her. "um, i'm hyunjin by the way."

jimin looked around, trying to find you. "i'm jimin."

hyunjin turned around, looking the girl up and down. "are you a trainee?"

her eyes met yunjin's once more, the idol rolling her eyes as she dragged her member into a secluded corner of the house.

jimin's eyes widened. she needed to find you before you saw the girl.

"jimin-ssi?"

"huh?" jimin's eyes snapped back to hyunjin's figure. "no. just a college student."

"oh?" the two continued to walk, entering the pool area. jimin could see ryujin sitting on a beach chair. she sped up, hyunjin following her now. "why are you here the–"

"y/n!"

she watched you perk up, a smile on your face as she approached you, hyunjin hot on her trail.

"jimin!" you engulfed her in a hug, missing the shared looks between your members.

she pulled back, your arms still around her waist. she moved a stray hair from your face. "are you okay?"

you smiled, your eyes dull from the alcohol running through your system. jimin bit back a smile, her heart hammering against her ribcage.

"i think i puked so hard my lungs stopped working." you giggled, humming as you hugged her again. hyunjin looked at yeji knowingly. "why are you here?"

"i'm here to take you home." jimin whispered, praying you couldn't hear her heart.

(you could.)

"i don't wanna go home." you muttered. you pulled back, yuna sending you a look of disgust. "i wanna... i don't know what i want."

jimin smiled lightly. "maybe water?"

"no thanks." you shook your head, slightly making yourself dizzy. "i tried to get water but yunjin was making out with some random girl there."

jimin frowned. she wished she could've come in sooner (if only it wasn't for that stupid bouncer.)

(she knew he was just doing what he was paid to do but still.)

"i should drink more." you muttered, an ugly feeling swirling around in your stomach.

you weren't jealous. you didn't even love her anymore. you and yunjin had been broken up for months now, but it was the fact that yunjin's actions still lingered in the back of your mind every day. you wondered how someone who loved you could ever do something like that and sleep peacefully in their bed.

you grabbed yuna's drink, trying to take a sip of it.

"y/n, no." jisu grabbed it back, giving it to yuna before she could complain once more. "thanks for getting jimin, hyunjin."

"no problem." he nodded, looking between the both of you before sending jimin an encouraging smile. "good luck."

jimin blushed, watching as he retreated into the crowd. he couldn't have known already, could he?

the college girl sighed, turning around to face you.

"let's get you home."

you shook your head.

jimin smiled at you, wondering how you could manage to win her heart over despite being extremely drunk. "you can sleep at my dorm."

she chuckled, watching your eyes sparkle with excitement. "like i'm in college?"

"yeah, sure." jimin grinned, staring at you as if you were the world. "i'll let you wear some of my clothes."

you grinned at her. "marry me first."

jimin felt her face go red as she shook her head. she turned to the others, watching as checked for your things in your bag.

"thanks again for taking her home." jisu sighed, pushing her hair out of her face. "we'll pick her up tomorrow."

"i don't mind." jimin shrugged, watching as you pinched yuna's cheek ("behave while unnie's gone." "you're so weird."). "really."

jimin watched as you lifted up a cat in the air. "can i bring this home with me?"

yeji grabbed it and gave it to chaeryeong beside her. "no."

"boo."

yu jimin was someone you've always known would be there.

she was your rock. she was the girl who had given you her last kuromi bandaid when some idiot kid pushed you off the swings too hard. she was the one who would stop by your dorm, food ready in hand.

yu jimin was your everything.

"i'm sorry." you apologized, watching as jimin set her glasses on the table next to her. she looked at you curiously. "for getting this drunk and making you pick me up."

"it's fine." jimin smiled at you. "i have a 2:30 tomorrow anyways."

"still." you fiddled with your fingers, leaning against the wall as you looked at the clock on her desk. "i'm a bad person."

jimin shook her head, sitting beside you. "you're not."

you shrugged, looking at the bedsheets beneath you.

"do you think she cheated because i'm a bad person?" you muttered, your voice weak with fear and exhaustion.

jimin looked at you. she never understood why you dated yunjin. the younger girl always put her wants first before your needs. you deserved nothing but the best, but yunjin was too busy trying to find anything to fulfill her compulsions.

huh yunjin saw everything but you.

"you aren't a bad anything." jimin preached, moving closer to you as your eyes continued to watch the bed. "she cheated because she's the bad person."

"she said she loved me though."

jimin shook her head. "that wasn't out of love."

"she treated me well before she cheated," you explained, trying to justify why something so horrible would even happen to you.

"so?" jimin watched as you leaned on her. "that doesn't mean anything."

you went silent, trying to take in what she was saying. your brain knew what she was saying was true, but because you were drunk, your heart managed to do the thinking for you.

"look," jimin leaned down, her face in front of yours. she could feel herself blush, but quickly pushed it down with a soft smile. "if i loved you the way you claimed she did then i would never ever do anything like that."

you grinned lightly, your eyes trained on her lips. "really?"

jimin could feel herself leaning in, but you were drunk. she wasn't going to kiss you, even if she really wanted to. you wouldn't remember it, and she wasn't going to put herself through that.

the college student pulled away. "you're a good, uh, friend."

"oh." jimin swore she saw your smile drop for a second. "thanks."

"you should go to sleep." jimin hummed. "you need to rest."

you sighed, your eyes shut as jimin traced your face with her eyes. her hand found its way to your hair, stroking it gently as the other girl prayed that yizhou was spending the night with aeri.

"jimin?"

she hummed once more. "yeah?"

"why didn't you kiss me?"

jimin stopped her movements, her body going stiff. "huh?"

you sat up, facing the girl as her mouth hung open.

"i know you're in love with me." you whispered, smiling playfully at her. "yeji accidentally told me two weeks ago when we went out to that barbecue place."

it took everything in yu jimin's body not to scream.

"oh."

"why didn't you tell me?" you muttered, your head resting on her shoulder. "i'm over yunjin."

"you are?"

"yeah." you nodded, glancing at the non-idol. "seeing her just hurts. fresh wounds, y'know?"

jimin nodded, too flustered to speak.

"did you not tell me because you thought i wouldn't like you back?"

jimin's eyes widened, her cheeks turning red. "you like me back?"

you pulled back, staring at her in awe.

how could someone be so beautiful, yet be so dense?

"i've been dropping hints for over a month now." you chuckled in disbelief. "i even dedicated a song to you during that concert we did last month."

jimin scratched her cheek. "i thought it was platoni–"

"only by leehi?" you looked at her, eyebrow raised.

"you said you dedicated it to someone special in the crowd!" jimin reasoned out.

"yeah, you!" you countered, shaking your head. "i know you're always watching."

jimin felt herself blushing once more. she hoped you haven't figured out about her spending habits with ITZY (you had already scolded her before for spending too much on girl's generation). "how?"

"because i'm always looking for you." you said softly, meaning every word of it.

"oh."

you stared at her, waiting for her to say something else.

you chuckled, shaking your head. "so are you gonna kiss me now?"

"you're drunk." she muttered. "what if–"

"i'll remember." you interrupted, smiling just for her. "i promise."

jimin nodded, leaning in hesitantly.

despite jimin's extrovert nature, she was always terrified of messing up. but jimin could never mess up in your eyes. everything she did, you loved.

you loved yu jimin.

you rolled your eyes, pulling her in for a kiss.

your lips met hers, just like jimin had wished for since she was twelve years old after you had written her a goodbye letter (you were upset that she had chosen someone else to be her partner in PE). she could taste the faint hint of blueberry flavored soju, mixing in with your expensive peach lip balm.

you held her face lightly as you smiled into the kiss.

everything just felt like you.

you pulled away, jimin groaning in annoyance as you moved to sit on top of her, continuing where you left off. she wrapped her hands around your waist, your arms finding their way around her neck.

if jimin didn't believe you before, she believed you now.

she kissed you harder, almost desperately. you could feel her gripping the back of your shirt, the thought of you driving her wild. she felt like her body was on fire, and jimin couldn't help but feel alive.

you were a spotlight, and she was basking in it.

she pulled back, leaving a trail of kisses down your throat before joining her mouth with yours.

you groaned, pulling away as you looked into her eyes.

"i'm tired."

jimin laughed, watching you hop off her, positioning yourself under her covers. she did the same, your eyes on her the entire time.

"go to sleep." she smiled, her eyes looking at your now bruised lips. she gave you a peck. "i'll be beside you."

you smiled. "i know."

yu jimin was the only spotlight you ever cared about.

> main masterlist.

[callofdudes]

Not the one that requested, but I think for the ace reader request’s wording, they meant the reader views the guys romantically but doesn’t confess as they are ace(not aroace) in fear of future rejection

Ooooh, oh that makes sense. Oops.... Well I might just write it all over again 🫣😬 that's my bad folks. That's my bad. So I'll just rewrite the prompt here and figure it out?? Same thing with the right prompt this time. I think I've got it this time.

It's literally almost the same writing of course I changed things, I just wasn't feeling trying to get creative all over again I'm sorry-

Telling them you love them... (Again)

Summary: Ace!Reader struggling to confess to the boys out of fear of not being sexually attracted to them.

Ghost 💀

You knew Ghost wasn't keen on love. He wasn't really keen on anything. So attempting to tell him you loved and appreciated him without being given a glare and a smack in the face was hard.

You usually kept to buying him gifts on the occasion, aiming to finish the paperwork he gave you early. But it all never felt like real appreciation.

You didn't want Ghost thinking that you were into him sexually. Yes you could admit he was attractive but it wasn't like that. That's where the struggles of your confessions lay... You were into him, so romantically swooned over him. And yet you wouldn't see him sexually if you were paid a million bucks. Because that just wasn't it.

It was easier just to write him a note, put down all your complicated emotions on paper and hope he would understand. And you dropped it in his office, worried he would freak out and yell at you for everything you said.

You were looking at documents on your computer when Ghost came into your office, completely unannounced.

"Sergeant."

"Oh- lieutenant!"

He holds up the note, placing it gently on your desk. You look down, immediately feeling ashamed of what you wrote. You wanted to cower away, not knowing how he would react. Would he be mad?? He obviously thought you liked him by the way he came in.

"I'm not mad, I'd just like to talk."

You flick your eyes back up, still feeling ashamed of the things you'd written.

"But I don't... Well, y'know."

"It's not like that..." You mutter, suddenly afraid to look up at him. Ghost's stance softens, voice getting a bit calmer.

"I hope it's not." He steps forward.

You frown, looking up at him. "I love you... Just romantically. I just didn't know how to tell you..."

He nods a little, piecing everything together again.

"And don't think its because of you, no no, I just-" Ghost stepped forward, his eyes locking with yours and he nodded. " I think I understand."

You smile, feeling relief fill you. "You gonna say it back??"

He huffs. "Maybe one day."

"I'll take that." You smiled and squeezed his hand.

The man hummed and nodded, squeezing your hand back. "Thank you I guess... You're not too bad yourself."

You chuckle and stand, eagerly embracing him. "I love you, Simon."

He tensed, but patted your back gently. "I know." He smiled softly. Embracing you firmer than before, resting the fabric of his mask against your forehead where you could feel the warm breaths against your skin. You knew this would work out. You weren't scared anymore.

Gaz 🧢

Gaz was quiet and reserved. Not like Ghost, but he was a private person. He preferred most of his time alone and you often wondered how Soap managed to drag him into such a tight knit friendship.

But you'd also grown close to Gaz. He wasn't as good with expressing his feelings in words he thought fit, so he just tried not to.

But you knew him for him. The music he liked, the movies and the bands. You two would spend hours just laughing and talking together in the quietness of the base, the best of friends.

You have wanted to express to Gaz how much you love him for a while now. Because you truly had fallen in love with him. But considering both of you couldn't get a grasp for proper words, you were afraid he would misunderstand.

Especially since you only saw him romantically. Funny little thing, but all you wanted was that soft, gentle affection and to finally be able to wrap your arms around him without fear. And yet you could never say it.

You were waiting by the cargo station, knee bouncing as you waited for the plane to open. Their mission had been met with problems and there was a slim chance they'd all come back alive.

When you saw Gaz you immediately ran to him, pulling him into your arms and hugging him tightly. "Oh thank goodness."

Gaz was a little surprised but hugged you back. You both stood there like that for a bit until you said it, you didn't care. You'd bottled it in in fear for so long, and you'd almost lost him. You almost lost your best friend. "I love you so much."

Gaz didn't question it. Didn't dig into it. He only held you tighter, reassuring you he loved you back, and he wasn't going anywhere. There wasn't any need for clarification, there just was. You pulled away enough to look into his eyes, and the relief filled you both to the brim, you'd sort it out later, go through the details later. For now, you were here and he was alive.

"You should get cleaned up. I'll make you some tea as well."

Gaz smiles. "You're awesome, thank you." He leans forward and presses a soft, almost feather light kiss to your cheek.

"Don't worry, I know." He whispered, squeezing your shoulder reassuringly. You didn't have to worry, he knew about your sexuality. And he was perfectly ok with it.

And without a second thought you both parted ways for a time.

Sure, you'd sort the fine details out later, but right now there wasn't a question about where this was headed.

Price 🥃

Price was a warm yet harsh soul. You'd known him for a couple years and he'd been amazing guidance for you. Always a light you could follow. In the darkest of times you could always reach for his hand and be assured you'd find it.

You'd recently found yourself swooning over him. You wanted to be in his embrace, feel those reassuring and firm hugs. His beard against your forehead when he kissed your head while talking softly.

And yet. Because of your ranks the scandelousness of a relationship was a bit tedious in the work forece. Sexual or not. But you didn't have sexual feelings for him. You were swimming in the ocean of love. But that was it.

After a recent mission you'd come back a little scratched up. You thought you were going to die and were in tears when you walked over to Price, feeling his arms wrap around you to comfort you.

He hadn't been there with you that time. But you were relieved to be back. Even when he pulled you into his office to clean your face you were still softly crying.

"It's alright sergeant, I've got you..." Price reassured as he pressed the alcohol pad to your chin.

You sniffled, wiping a tear from your cheek. "Price??"

"Yes sergeant. I'm right here."

You sniffle. "You know I love you right?"

He looks deep into your eyes, taking a moment to process your body language and fully understand. "I love you too sergeant. I'm glad you're ok."

You nodded a little. "You... You know it's not sexual right? I'm sorry if..." You said weakly. The earlier regret of the mission had made you slip your tongue, and now you felt more anxiety.

"I know kid, I know." He patted your shoulder. "Come here, you're still a little shaken up aren'tcha?"

You nod and crawl into his arms, feeling him hug you tightly. "It's alright. I'm here." He runs his hand up to the your nape of your neck, reassuring you, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. "This alright?"

You nod, clinging to him.

"Alright. We'll sort all these feelings out together in the morning ok? But I understand, and its ok."

"I love you Price." You choked out again. He softly shushed you, keeping you in his arms. "I know Y/n, I know."

Soap 🧼

Johnny was not unfamiliar with your secrets. He knew you very well and had come to learn of your lack of sexual attraction to others. Didn't change how he saw you, you were still his bestie.

He himself was conflicted in if he should tell you that he loves you. He didn't know how you might take it and wanted to remain respectful of you and your boundaries.

You laid on his bed with him, listening and joking as he told you a story about setting off a small bomb near the recruit bathrooms.

He was laughing so hard his face turned red, smiling wide as his hand brushed across yours while trying to find air.

You smiled back, gently taking his hand in yours. You watched his cheeks tint red and it makes your heart flutter. You were so in love with him. But knowing Soap... You were so scared to confess to him. Especially with your lack of sexual attracion and knowing he wanted kids in he future.

You'd bothed talked about your ideal future relatonship, and though you were almot perfect for each other, the differences were staggering to say the least.

But the way he was looking at you. With tha lost look of utter happiness as he talked to you...

"Soap??" You look up at him with a slightly less whimsy gaze, contemplating the heaviness of your next words.

"Soap, I just want you to know... You're my best friend and.." you squeeze his hand. "I love you."

He slowly calmed down and looked at you. "Oh... you do?" He could see the look in your eye and shuffled closer, getting slightly into your bubble without realizing.

You felt comfortable with him. So incredibly comfortable. All those years fretting and worrying what he'd think. All you saw right now was the smile of your best friend and how much you were in love with him...

Soap is a little quiet for a moment. "Not sexual right?"

His frown makes you worry as you rush to explain as best you could all over again. You just really love him and everything about him. Just not sexually.

It makes a smile spread across his face. He takes your hand and places it against his chest. "You are the most amazing person in the whole world y/n. I don't know what I'd ever do without you. I love you too."

"You're sure... but, our futures?"

He leaned in, cupping your chin. "We'll figure it out, promise?''

You smile softly, happy to have said it. He leaned in, warm breath drifting over your lips. "Can I kiss you?" He asked. You nod, and before you know it, his lips are sinking against yours.

König 🐙

You sighed, bouncing your knee in agitation. The thought of your first solo mission... You'd be lying if you said it wasn't daunting. You'd always gone on missions with König or different members from KorTac. But you'd never been assigned your own mission.

You started to question if you'd be good enough and could get home ok. It made you worry, if you'd ever come back.

You were wrapped up in your thoughts, not noticing the large figure who sat down next to you, leaning over to look at your face. "What has you looking like that y/n?"

You looked up at the sound of his voice and sighed. "I'm just nervous about the mission..."

He nodded understandingly and took your hand in his. "You'll be alright. I do not doubt your abilities one bit you know. You'll do it."

You chuckle softly. "You say that now but... What if I get hurt??"

"Then I'll come find you." He squeezes your hand. "But you will be alright."

Your heart clenches hearing him say that. You'd found yourself falling in love with Konig after a bit of time working with him. And now you were contemplating telling him. The only thing keeping you nack was well... You weren't sexually attracted to him. And you didn't want Koing to take it the wrong way.

You squeeze his hand a little tighter.

"König? You know... You've really been a good friend. And you've helped me grow so much since I've been here... I really don't know what I'd do without you here with me."

He tutted softly. "Do not start writing the words for your obituary, y/n."

You sigh, leaning against his shoulder, relishing the last hours you have with him before you'll be sent off. "I... I love you König... You know that? You're everything to me. I know it hasn't been two years but-"

"Shh" he squeezes your hand. "Take some deep breaths." He smiles softly. "I love you too, but do not expect you to be going anywhere soon. Ok?"

You relax, seeing how it wasn't a big deal. "It's not... sexual though, but It doesn't mean I dont love you, I'm very attracted to you, but it's not... Like that."

He hummed again. "We'll talk about all this in detail when you get back. And you will return, alright?''

You nod once more. "Thank you König. Thank you."

He squeezes your hand again gently. For reassurance. To tell you no matter what he was there. No matter what.

Alejandro & Rudy.

Alejandro sighed loudly, flopping down on the couch next to you and Rodolfo.

"Well well, welcome back Mr. Vargas." You chuckle, putting down your phone to see his tired expression. "How did it go?" Rodolfo asked lazily, eyes still trained on his book, curled up on the couch, his thigh against yours.

"I'm so glad to be off my feet." Alejandro sighed, grabbing the tv remote and turned it on, flipping through the shows before finding something to play.

He gets back up again and wanders into the kitchen, grabbing three ice cold drinks, tossing the other two to you guys who eagerly catch them and crack them open.

Alejandro huffs when he sits back down, taking a swig and finally relaxing. "Glad to be back with my two favorite people."

You and the boys were close enough and comfortable enough that you were ok with their physical touch, so you were used to Alejandro wrapping a respectful arm around your shoulder and you'd usually end up snuggled up, giving Rodolfo the room to join when he wanted.

Today was no different as you snuggled up to his side and felt his warmth. "Geez, maybe you need a bath. And you smell fuckin' awful." You snort.

Rodolfo chuckles and nods. "I can smell you from here Ale."

The man only rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Ya both better appreciate my presence. It's a gift."

"We do appreicate you Ale."

Considering how romantically fallen down the stairs you were for these two you were surprised you hadn't confessed yet. Always relishing the times you got loving physical contact with them. But knowing Ale as the flirt you always hesitate confessing your romantic attraction. Especially as it wasn't backed by sexual attraction.

You snuggled closer. "You work really hard for us Alejandro. You deserve all the rest today." You smile and hug his waist. You really did appreciate him. The fear and the worry of what he might think, of how he'd feel if you ever expressed it... But you went for it. You wanted him to know how much you appreciated him. You really did.

"You know... I love you, Ale. Like I said, you're amazing and you support us so much. Working your butt off like this just so we get a few hours off."

But they both were aware of your sexual preferences. That being none, so hearing this from you, they knew it was nothing but soft affection you had in your heart for them...

Alejandro smiled softly, his arm wrapping a little tighter around you. "Is that so??" He chuckled. "Not even you could resist falling in love with this eh?"

You roll your eyes playfully as he pulls you closer by the shoulder and kisses the top of your head. "I love you too y/n."

You stick out your foot, bumping your feet against Rodolfo's. "You too mister!" He looks up and smiles. "You are good y/n, it's a blessing to have you with us."

"Then come here you, get in on the cuddles."

Rodolfo huffs and puts down his book, but curls up with you two as you all watch the show. He leans in and nuzzles his nose against your neck, kissing your jaw briefly. Soft affection. Nothing better than spending time with your two favorite people.

[psiithirisma]

AU where Phil is a single father of 3 and also owns a restaurant. Meets Kristin and falls in love but doesn't know how to "charm her" and neapolitrio (his kids) tries to help but they're little kids so it's all silly and cute.

Phil invites Kristin to a date in his restaurant after closing hours, she accepts. Then it's all just a nervous Phil + neapolitrio trying to create a romantic atmosphere and also one of them being the chef, one helping, and one the waiter.

He questions many /many/ times why he accepted to go with his boys' idea

Also, the 3 of them get Phil's instinctive dad side to show through the whole night by accident

little Tommy is the waiter and when he goes to ask them for their orders and is about to write them down he realizes he doesn't know how, so he asks Phil, who only sighs fondly and takes Tommy's notepad and pen and writes it for him. Kristin finds it adorable.

Tho the illusion is soon broken after Tommy thanks his dad and checks the notepad, frowns, and says out loud "dad I can't read this, your handwriting is shit!"

Phil, immediately: Tommy! Don't say that!

Tommy: what? Is true! You told us not to lie

Phil: no-

Tommy: am I not allowed to say bad things abt you in front of your girlfriend?

Phil: I meant don't curse.

Tommy: aw, that's not fair! you get to do it all the time.

Tommy: and Techno and Wilbur do it all the time when you aren't near!

Wilbur, from the kitchen: DON'T SNITCH YOU RAT!

Phil, whispering while he covers his red face: for fucks sake...

Tommy: see!!!

Tommy goes back to the kitchen shouting "Wiill, what does it says here? dad's handwriting is  dog poop!" which only gets more giggles from Kristin and for Phil to press his hands harder against his face.

That embarrassing bit over, Kristin and Phil move on and keep talking. But then you can hear from the speakers a young voice (Wilbur) whispering "it's this on? [Louder] Hello, dadza and Kristin! we made our own cool song for you lovebirds, wink".

It's followed by a song with really bad quality audio, bc none of them could figure out how to put a song properly so they just kept the speaker open meanwhile Wilbur leave the song playing through his cellphone.

This song is just some cover from an already existent one except for some parts being changed to Phil's and Kristin's name to, y'know, make it more romantic.

Phil considers death would be a kind fate at this point for him.

When the song ends, quick steps can be heard and the next second Wilbur is at their table, smiling wildly and asking Phil if he liked the song

Dad mode kicks in and all previous embarrassment almost seems like it never existed from the start

Phil: you have been improving a lot, well done, I loved it

Wilbur, beaming with joy: I learned it all by myself too!

Phil: wait all by yourself?

Wilbur: (intense nodding)

Phil: aw, mate! I'm so proud of you

Wilbur goes to the kitchen, celebrating after Phil's compliments.

Phil and Kristin go back to chatting, this time a little more at ease and without many interruptions, soft sounds emanating from the kitchen.

That's it until Techno shouts Phil's name and Wilbur is at the kitchen's entrance calling for Phil at the same time with a panicking expression.

Phil excuses himself and gets up from his seat at the speed of light to the kitchen. His ears are met by the sound of sniffles.

There, in the kitchen, he can see Techno kneeling in front of Tommy trying to calm him down while he holds Tommy's little hands gently.

Wilbur explains that Tommy was helping them cook by peeling potatoes but cut himself accidentally and now he's bleeding and they didn't know what to do nor where are the band-aids

Phil, being the only man ever, sorts the situation easily. Telling the twins where the medical kit is while he takes Tommy in his arms and washes the blood away with cold sink water, cradling him to console his youngest's sobs.

Soon enough Tommy it's all patched up (they only cleaned the cut and put a band-aid on it) but doesn't let go of his dad so Phil just kinda accepts this is his new lifestyle.

He's about to come back with the little blonde to his and Kristin's table but then realizes the woman admiring the scene from behind the counter. Phil is halfway mouthing an apology until Kristin seems to land on something and alerts them about the smoke coming from the stove.

They turn to look at it and oh yeah there's smoke coming from the stove oven...

When they open it, the family are met with more smoke that only gets Techno coughing and his face tainted with gray and the entire kitchen clouded. Oh there's also fire.

Kristin is this time who handles the situation, taking the emergency fire extinguisher from a wall near and putting out the fire, telling the twins to open the windows to clear the place of smoke.

After that Techno is already apologizing, embarrassed that he forgot about the chicken in the oven and also miscalculated the temperature.

But Phil just hugs him (the best he can without squeezing Tommy between them) and reassures him it's okay, that he appreciates that Techno tried and the only thing he cares about is that all 3 of them are okay.

Techno seems still unsure but any uncertainty he had is washed off when he feels Tommy's little hand giving him some comforting pats on the top of his head.

Wilbur breaks the tender moment by saying "unlike you pair of losers I did everything right so I think I just deserve a hug for awesomeness” which makes Phil laugh and both, Techno and Tommy, flip him off.

Tommy also shows him his tongue, y'know, for a double offense.

They get scolded (“kids, don't flip your brother off”) and Wilbur joins the hug, against Tommy and Techno's wishes.

Phil (with Tommy still in his arms) and Kristin return to their table, followed by two tired twins who just pull some chairs near them, sitting next to Phil, each on each side.

Kristin and Phil look at each other in silence, both tired but smiling.

“Pizza?”.

“Pizza”.

[maxwell-grant]

You’ll prob wait to answer this after Caped Crusader drops, but: Does making Penguin NOT a white guy drastically change the character? And if so, is that a good thing?

Anonymous asked: So... Thoughts on Oswalda from Batman: The Caped Crusader?

@jcogginsa asked: New Batman show is out, and with it is a new Penguin. Have any thoughts on Minnie Driver's take on the Penguin?

Regarding the first ask, I mean, it really ought to, right? That seems to be part of the point of doing this kind of thing, to change or recontextualize something big and important about a character in a new light. If it wasn't supposed to be some kind of big change, if it wasn't meant to at least be something new or say something slightly different, I'd ask what would be the point of doing it. Don't get me wrong, it's absolutely a thing to do just for fun / variety's sake, but it's not a choice that can just exist in a vacuum, it does matter how and why exactly you're doing it.

There's a couple of things that I'd say make or break this kind of stuff for me, besides like, you know, not removing existing meaningful elements of characters identities, like making Jewish or Romani characters generic caucasian Americans, real basic decency stuff y'know, not a lot to ask here. I think a change like this should at least bring questions to strengthen it, like: If this character is defined by certain traits or saying certain things, how is this interacting with those? Is this strengthening those existing traits and statements, is it providing new ones, or is it weakening them without offering much in return? Questions about how much can you redefine a character and still have that character be recognizable and all that, and of course the actual important questions of, Who is this for? What is being said here? Why was this decision made? And so on.

The example that comes to mind regarding that specificity, and how that can work wonders to breathe new life onto a character, is the MCU take on Namor, as Ritesh Babu elaborated on in a Patreon article

The reason I say I never truly cared for Namor is that while I thought him a great, compelling character in plenty of works I loved, I always felt a lack of emotional connection. He was enjoyable, but I didn't care about him, y'know? There was a connect. Watching Ryan Coogler's Wakanda Forever helped me bridge that disconnect. I finally realized what had been missing for me. It was Emotional Context.

Namor is historically an abrasive character. He's an angry character. He's got fury and rage, and he doesn't suffer fools. He's headstrong and unrelenting. He's an unyielding force. And he's great and fun that way, historically handled by mostly White writers (with rare exceptions, such as Greg Pak). But it was also, for me, an anger and rage and fury framed and constructed in such a way that it could be broad-strokes. It could be anything and everything from the pollution and climate ruination to perhaps some other tragic thing involving someone he cared about.

Ryan Coogler and Tenoch Huerta to me granted the character an emotional context here that clarifies everything he is, and all that shapes his thought. He's not angry at the surface world and its clownshit in abstract. It's not just the anger of a distant warrior-king of the oceans. It's the anger of the colonized, of the Othered.

What Ryan Coogler and Tenoch Huerta did is give him specificity. He's not just a broad-strokes figure in White hands, for White writers to write as an archetypal broad-strokes morally murky angry bastard guy. No, there's a specific history to this guy, there's a cultural specificity and context to his very existence.

And so Namor isn't some weird racially ambiguous/sorta white figure in largely White hands, but is instead an Indigenous Mexican hero and legend. He's a Mesoamerican figure and he's Mayan.

Coogler dispenses with the vagueries and broad-strokes thinking of the comics, and like any interesting creator should, asks good, rational questions. And that specificity, that's really what makes it for me. That's what I was missing. This is an attempt at using genre to speak to truth, to realities and real experiences, which are important to Black and Brown people. It's a far cry from some abstracted away thing to serve a primary White audience and its sensibilities or interests. - Ryan Coogler's Namor and Specificity

An example I'll give, as far as one reinvention that can make sense but I didn't find so interesting: The conception of Deadshot I like, from Suicide Squad (1987) and bits of Secret Six, is heavily informed by him being a privileged rich white man, a morally catatonic and emotionally rotten self-serving piece of shit in large part because of his privileged background and experiences, as well as a guy who's purposefully evoking the image of white western cowboys and providing commentary on their archetype. Deadshot, to me, is heavily informed by his whiteness, by his American elite background, and by his toxic masculinity, and thus the cocktail of what Deadshot is, comments on and speaks to comprises specific things that I think you'd have to approach very very differently if Floyd Lawton is a black man. I think the specificity of what that character is saying or tends to stand for is lost in adaptations that fudge those elements to make him more like the Will Smith version - you can definitely have another kind of meaningful and cool take on Deadshot, but it's a Deadshot who's gonna have to be saying different things, if he is to be saying anything at all - and most of the time, he isn't, and so to me, that context behind Deadshot is lost with not a lot gained in return. Under no circumstances does this mean you shouldn't be allowed to do it, but I feel like if you're dedicated to doing this to an existing character, there should be at least some commitment to what they are and do.

Getting back to that first question, it also really depends on what exactly are you changing. Like regarding the Penguin specifically, is it his race? His gender? His nationality? It's a very broad question to apply a single Yes or No to so I'm gonna say it's kind of both. On one hand, obviously some major aspects of his presentation and origin and defining traits would have to be altered to better correspond to that defining change. On the other hand, he is already extensively defined around his issues with his self-image and his surroundings and how people treat him, a person who is ostracized and Othered because of his looks or his background and where he stands in the city he grows up in. One of the consistent cornerstones of Oswald as a character is that he's trying extremely hard to overcompensate in wealth and class and power partially to override the ability of others to marginalize him over his weight or stature or poverty or disability and so on, in no small part that's what allowed him to take on protagonist status in recent years. If he was just a regular white guy, he'd be Rupert Thorne. Although, on the other other hand, I must stress here that treating marginalized traits as if they are equally interchangeable is how you get the X-Men school of representation, and we simply have do better than that.

I was very intrigued by the idea of turning Oswald into a woman. Fat men are very often shamed and ridiculed due to traits they are perceived to have in common with women, to be a fat man is to be dehumanized and stripped of masculinity and thus stripped of your worth of as man. To be accepted, fat men are forced to overperform masculinity just as fat women are forced to overperform femininity, and that element of overperformance is never not present in Oswald Cobblepot, who essentially lives in drag 24/7. A genderbend take on Oswald could certainly add a whole different meaning to his typical overreaction to jokes about his weight or looks, things that are commonly played as a joke. Fat women get consistently treated like absolute garbage by most people in ways that are different, more pervasive and frankly nastier than the ways fat men are also treated like garbage, and if people didn't treat him like garbage, The Penguin wouldn't be the person they are.

Penguin as a woman is a concept that could force a lot of his traits to demand renewed consideration, and in some ways you could argue he kinda already is feminized. He certainly doesn't get treated as a man the way Batman and the Joker and Bane and Gordon are. He overcompensates extremely hard in that regard, and it doesn't stick, he can act as tough and grizzled as he wants and he will never not be "the fat one", will never not get pushed around by the real man in Gotham, will never not be the unfit and bloated and squishy lesser-man hiding behind the umbrella because, why, he's not man enough to grit his teeth and hash it out with his fists. If we go back to Count Fosco from The Woman in White, we'll find this is something else they share in common:

"Fat as he is, and old as he is, his movements are astonishingly light and easy. He is as noiseless in a room as any of us women. With all his look of unmistakable mental firmness and power, he is as nervously sensitive as the weakest of us. He starts at chance noises as inveterately as Laura herself."

This passage holds the key to Marian’s complex attitude toward the Count; she is at once fascinated and threatened by him. As Marian’s description reveals, he is both alluring and dangerous, not merely because of his increasingly suspicious behavior throughout the narrative, but because he unnaturally exhibits the qualities of both sexes.

Even though Marian does not explicitly identify the Count’s androgyny as the reason for her discomfort with him, the novel’s keen preoccupation with identifying unknown figures by their sex illuminates the anxiety underlying Marian’s description of the Count. The Count complicates those binary categories, and, in true Victorian fashion, his deviance attracts simultaneous fascination and repulsion - Count Fosco and the Androgynous Mystique

He is Oswald Cobblepot, the pathetic little momma's boy, because even his personal tragedies are depicted as lesser, insignificant, not the right kind of cool cinematic masculine tragedy, and he is The Penguin, the eccentric oddly enthusiastic about worthless little things like his favorite animals and trinkets - things that the narrative deems worthless because Oswald is worthless in the literal term: he is worth less than Bruce Wayne, less than Batman, and we watch him as he fights tooth and nail to deny this, whether it's by beating Batman his own way or seeking power to avert his lot in life and stand above all the men that have put him down, or even just seeking villainy as a form of self-actualization, through that perseverance and ability to outmaneuver men so much bigger and scarier, who think they can nail the Penguin while their world is swiped from under them.

It's not for nothing that, in terms of where they stand in Batman's world nowadays, Penguin is practically sharing an apartment with Catwoman and the Riddler, the other 60s camp queens who won't leave banding together even when they can't stand each other. So, yeah, I was extremely curious as to what direction Caped Crusader was gonna lean into with the idea. Could it go wrong and be offensive garbage? Obviously, but I also thought it promised an intriguing new direction, of context that could add or rework so much about his existing traits. I didn't like the name Oswalda, no, but even besides all that I mentioned above, with The Penguin show coming out with it's new take on the character that's all about modernizing and grounding and twisting him around, I thought going big on Classic Penguin, with the top hat and monocle and sword-umbrella and existing in a Golden Age Gotham, and doing a genderflip, was a very solid idea to place opposite of it. So how did I feel about Oswalda Cobblepot?

...It sucked, guys, I'm sorry, I'm really not happy to say it. Caped Crusader's first episode was ASS, and 6 episodes in, while the rest of it has been better (not great, but tolerable, occasionally good even), that pilot was the most stone-faced I've ever been sitting through a Batman thing and frankly I don't even have anything to say about regarding Oswalda. There were tentative beginnings of a take but not actually anything that rounds out into one (and frankly I'd say this Harley Quinn also has that problem to a lesser degree, this show so far has been just really barebones across the board), and frankly I'm not asking for much, I've lived off breadcrumbs before when it comes to Penguin, I'd be good with something if there was something. She isn't remotely a threat to Batman and seems pretty damn dumb, and she gets dealt with on the pilot to make way for Rupert Thorne in a way that kinda really betrays the escalation theme they're shooting for here and it's, guys what else am I supposed to talk about here, seriously?

I don't even like the design that much, it feels like they started from Penguin's head and shoulders and then tried as hard as possible to cinch her waist and slim her down leaving a weird disproportion between her upper body and legs, it looks weird in some shots but I guess you could say that's just the animation being, uh, sub-par to be polite. I guess I like her ruthlessness and that scene where she murders one of her sons, even though that's her being really stupid not noticing the obvious snitch in the room, and it's more so because that was the only moment in the episode where something almost cool happened. I do like her being a cabaret singer, but, man she sounds way too boring for a character with such a distinct way of speaking, if she didn't look like the Penguin from the shoulders up you would never tell that's who this was supposed to be.

I'm sorry that she continues Penguin's bad streak from BTAS, man what a bummer. Still, I have been really enjoying The Batman Audio Adventures lately, it's not like I'm starved for a more classically flavored take on Penguin, so it's only a bummer. I'm open to the idea that she can come back in a later season for a better showing, and she was far from the worst thing about the episode, in fact by process of elimination she was overall the best, but she was the one part I had the most slight hopes for. Oh well.

[sissylittlefeather]

Hi, I'm dying to see new Elvis fanfic so here I am.

Prompt 5 with young Elvis and could you make both fluff and smut. My idea is that Elvis cums prematurely and he's embarrassed so reader reassures him.

Thanks!

Hey Anon! I'm sorry this took me so long. I wasn't able to write for a while, but I think I got my groove back. I hope you love this!

Prompt: "That was quick." With 50s Elvis

Warnings: 18+ MDNI, kissing, cussing, fingering, p in v sex, unprotected sex, creampie

You thought Elvis was cute even when you met him 3 days before your 13th birthday. You'd been close friends ever since, but you tried to never let on that you had a crush on him. He seemed to enjoy just talking to you and you let that be enough for you for years. Then, he started singing and playing shows all around the south. You didn't see each other nearly as often and you were finding it hard to ignore the fact that you missed him desperately.

Now, here you sit on the front steps of your parents' house in your favorite dress anxiously waiting for him to arrive. Finally, he pulls up in a shiny new Cadillac and jumps out to open the door for you. When he gets to you, he leans in and kisses your cheek, making your heart skip a beat.

"Hey, honey. Didja miss me?"

"Nah, I've been pretty busy myself. Where did this come from?" You lie and gesture to the car.

"Just bought it! Do ya like it?"

"It sure is pretty." You say as he opens the door and you slide onto the seat. He runs around and gets in the driver's seat. You ride along quietly for a while as he talks about what it's like to play shows and the people he meets on the road. When he gets to a stoplight, he pauses and looks over at you.

"Y'know, speakin' of pretty. You look really nice, tonight." You snap your head over and look at him as he gazes at you. He's never called you pretty before.

"Thank you..."

"No, I'm serious. Have you always been this pretty, darlin'? And I just didn't notice?" The light turns green and he turns back to look at the road. You're not sure how to answer him, so you settle on playful teasing.

"I've always been a pretty girl, Elvis. It's not my fault you're the last one to figure it out." You say with a grin.

"Oh? I'm the last one? You got a buncha fellas chasin' ya around these days?" He tries to say it jokingly, but there's an edge to his voice. Is he jealous?

"Well, not a bunch, but a few." You don't care about any of them, but he doesn't need to know that. You say it really to gauge how he'll respond.

He turns to look at you and he's not smiling anymore. Instead, he grits his teeth and pulls off the road to a clearing that looks out over the town. Once the car is parked, he turns to look at you again.

"I-I-I'm sorry, honey. I guess I'm just protective of you, is all."

"I don't need you to protect me. I'm a big girl, Elvis." Your cheeks flush.

"Yeah, I noticed!" He grabs the steering wheel and grips it tightly. "That's what I'm tryin' to tell ya." He turns back to you. Your heart is pounding and you're breathing so fast that there's no way he can't see it. His eyes flick down to your lips and it feels like you might just die right there on his front seat. You've wanted him to want you for so long.

"I missed you like crazy, y/n. I didn't even realize how much you meant to me until I couldn't talk to you every day. You're all I think about. Talking to you, being around you, kissing you..." When he says the last part, he leans in close to you and presses his soft lips on yours. After a few seconds, you pull back a bit.

"I lied earlier, when I said I didn't miss you. I miss you every minute of every day." You whisper and look down, afraid of what he might say next. He puts his hand under your chin and tips your face up to look him in the eye.

"You are everything to me, y/n. Will you let me love you? As more than a friend?" It's like a dream come true and you're only half sure you heard him right.

"You... you want me?" He smiles and chuckles lightly.

"With my whole heart, baby." He moves his hand to the side of your face and kisses you deeply on the mouth, parting your lips with his own and letting his tongue slip into your mouth. You feel your warm center get even warmer as he kisses you. As the passion overcomes you both, he lays you back on the seat and slides his hand up under your skirt. In the heat of the moment, you forget that as a lady you should tell him no, and instead let him grab your panties and pull them down. He runs his hand up the inside of your thigh and pushes one finger into you. You stop kissing him just long enough to moan at the sensation. He smiles with his nose still touching yours and adds a second finger, continuing to push into your wetness.

"Oh, Elvis." You moan into his mouth, catching your bottom lip between your teeth.

"Honey, I've wanted to see you like this for so long. Will ya... will ya let me make love to you?" He watches your face carefully for a sign that you want to say no. But you nod frantically.

"Please." He smiles again and sits up. You sit up too and your hands go straight to the buttons on his pants. You can see his hardness pressing against the fabric and you need to see him entirely, need to feel him inside you. Once his cock is free, you pull your skirt up and straddle him, sinking down onto him slowly. He groans as you take each inch of him inside you. Then, he grabs the back of your neck and pulls your mouth down to him, kissing you passionately as you begin to move on him. When you switch to grinding against him, pushing him deeper inside you, he pulls back from the kiss suddenly, a look of panic in his eyes.

"Oh, fuck, baby, no- I-I-" Before either of you can do anything else, though, he comes inside you, hard, and sets his head on your shoulder.

"That was quick." You laugh lightly as he groans.

"Shit, I'm sorry." He still has his face buried on your shoulder in embarrassment. "I-I-I've just wanted ya for so long. I couldn't control it... I-"

"Elvis. It's okay. That's not the only time we're gonna do this." He pops his head up off your shoulder and looks you in the eyes.

"It's not?"

"Oh, honey. I've loved you since I was 12. You think I'm gonna give up that easily?" He laughs and wraps his arms around your waist.

"Give me an hour. We'll go to the diner or something. And then I'll show you I know how to do this right. I love you, baby." You nod and kiss him again. You'll give him a thousand chances. This is all you've ever wanted.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Enjoy!

[chaoscriess]

hi, i've getting into euphoria recently and i was wondering if you could write some poly!maddie and cassie with a fem!reader? it could be some time after season 2 with them liking the same girl, because y'know we love a trainwreck. reader is pretty normal, sort of like a background character but she's pretty charming and playful and just has no idea about any drama at school. she only knows these 2 as those girls who fought each other in lexi's play, poor girl has no idea what's going on. in truth, i just wanna see a trainwreck with maddie and cassie with a completely oblivious reader. sorry if it's a little long ;-;

I absolutely love this idea it literally temporarily got rid of my writers block tysm.

poly!maddie and cassie x reader

𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒! none

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒! swearing, might not be exactly what was requested, I was feeling a bit too fluffy.. oops..

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒! on mobile, format might be weird. lowercase intended, unedited, double periods intended

two months ago, you didn't have a clue what was going on between maddy perez and cassie howard. as far as you were concerned, they were just two ex best friends who both happened to like you. however, it was much more than that. you knew about nate jacobs, and the fact that he has been on-and-off with maddy, but you had no clue that cassie had been with him too.

you had your own little circle, consisting of stoners who never payed any attention to anything, and people who genuinely didn't care about their education, who hardly ever went to class. so when you asked your friends what had happened, they were clueless as well.

you'd never truly tried to find out what had happened between the girls though, or why they fought, even though you were friends with lexi. in all honesty, you thought it would be better if you stayed oblivious. why? because you knew that finding out could change the way you viewed them, and you weren't ready for that.

lexi had told you about a week ago that they liked you, and you had been thinking about what to do ever since. neither of the girls had ever been in a poly relationship, and you were certain that they never would be. you hadn't been in one either, the closest you had gotten was being in a open relationship.

however, when you got word from lexi that she had talked to cassie for you, your view on the situation changed.

"wait.. so, you like y/n, right?" cassie looked over at lexi, panicking and trying to figure out how she knew. "um, what? no, why would you even think that? that's like, so gross.. like who even is she?!" lexi laughed at her sisters behavior and rolled her eyes. "yeah, okay. you know maddy likes her too, right?" cassie sighed and looked away, now upset. "yes obviously I know, lexi." lexi muttered an 'ookay..' and thought about what to say next. she wanted to get cassie to be open to at least the idea of being in a relationship with y/n and maddy, she thought that maybe it would help it actually happen. of course, she didn't think this was the greatest idea, but she would do anything for y/n, even if it meant getting her sister into a potentially toxic relationship.

"so... would you ever like, be in a relationship with her and maddy? like if you were both dating y/n... separately? I don't know if that makes sense so.." cassie cut her off by yelling 'no!' and she turned to face the wall. "well.. I guess maybe, but I'm tired of sharing everyone with maddy. I guess if y/n really wanted it then yeah.." lexi smiled and got up, mumbling a quick thanks before leaving cassies room, leaving her to yell after her in a panicked voice. "wait you're not going to tell her, are you?... lexi?!"

yeah, she told you. you were really happy, you pretty much just got cassie to agree to a poly relationship with you and maddy. both of the girls would be dating you but not eachother, you didn't see a problem. you didn't know about their past with nate, so you didn't worry about them getting jealous of one another. all you had to do now was get someone to ask maddy if she would, and then ask them both yourself.

it wasn't as easy as it sounded.

you spent days asking around, trying to get someone who talked to maddy to talk to you. finally, you had settled on rue. even though you and rue didn't know eachother very much, she found your situation amusing, and wanted to help. so, she did the same thing lexi did, and asked her if she would ever date you while cassie did as well.

maddy was more adamant about not wanting to do it, but a few days later, you had got a message from her in the middle of the night, asking to meet up at a local 24-hour diner.

when you arrived, you found maddy sitting at a booth in the back. she stood up when she saw you walking towards her, and motioned for you to follow her back outside, behind the diner, where you found cassie waiting. it was cold and raining, but the three of you stood far apart from eachother in silence until cassie spoke up. "maddy, why the fuck are we here?" maddy sighed and stomped lightly, mud splashing onto her legs. she tried to speak a few times, but only ended up blubbering like a fish. she felt pathetic. "I just.. well I wanted to.. um.. well.. y/n can I talk to you alone?" you nodded and walked around the side of the building, until you were just out of earshot of cassie. or so you thought. cassie heard everything the two of you said.

"okay, fuck. I like you. kind of, like a lot.. and I want to be with you. and I know that cassie likes you too so I just want you to pick one of us and move on. please." you stared at her for a moment, but in your head you were bouncing off the walls and running in circles. maddy just told you that she likes you. holy shit on a stick. that was not something you were expecting to hear.

you opened your mouth to speak, but stopped when cassie came around the corner with her arms crossed and a baffled look on her face. "are you fucking kidding me? you brought her here to make her choose between us?" maddy sighed as cassie walked towards the two of you. "listen, its not going to work out if we do it any other way, I just figured we could get it over with." you stood there in silence as the two went back and forth, praying to god they wouldn't break out into a fight.

you backed up a few feet as the girls started to get closer to each other, and they noticed immediately. the two of them turned to you and stopped with their argument, before stepping away from eachother. cassie licked her lips and took a deep breath before gathering her courage to speak. "can't we just.. both date her?" maddy looked at her with wide eyes and her mind immediately went to rue. "wait, did rue talk to you too?!" cassie looked at her with a confused frown on her face. "..what? no, lexi di- nevermind."

you tried to hide the smile that was forming on your face. cassie actually just suggested that you be in a poly relationship. maddy sighed and looked around for a minute, before crossing her arms and speaking. "well.. I guess we could.."

and so, after a few weeks, you all got comfortable. it took maddy and cassie a bit more time than you, but you eventually made it work, even if you still have your ups and downs. now, you couldn't be happier.

[joltrify]

INSOMNIA!//

I say this all the time, but another banger MV by Eve~

I REALLY wanted to make a profound piece but ultimately the sketch went through so many iterations over the last 3 weeks that I lost steam for the project... so here are the sketches that I kept.

Sleep deprived ramble abt things that i really liked about the MV under the cut (sleep deprived wasn't meant to be a joke that's just what i am rn lol-)

I rewatched this MV many, MANY times so i could figure out what i wanted to draw (you're welcome Eve for giving you another million trillion gazillionviews) and I wanted to note some of deets i enjoyed

big fan of the moment before the second chorus where Monika's monitors (at least i'm assuming) capture mc 'sleepwalking' because of his zingai

(and i just went to Mariyasu's page and it turns out I got that spot on- the sleepwalking portion that is, still don't know abt Monika HAHA)

You can actually see his Zingai in all the opening scenes somewhere in the background, and i think that's fun... like after their first meeting he never left

MC's room is riddled with medication... I can only speculate that it's to treat some sort of pain that comes with the burns he has, as he takes it in the morning and evening (I guess it could also be sleep medication, but he has it on his table before work, which would be counterintuitive)

Love the stark contrast of yellow and that deep blue/ almost black - not entirely sure what is means/ represents, but it's obvious that it holds significance to the character as his eyes go from a bright yellow to that deep blue.

(added this thought last:) I think it may have something to do with the divide between fantasy and reality, dream and the waking world... so it makes sense that the character in his older age adorns himself in those darker colors as he's trying to be more 'present', but in times where he fantasizes/dreams either he or the world around him is enveloped in yellow. For example, when he's at work and he wishes to be anywhere BUT there he's wearing the most yellow as he thinks about... y'know. (I'm going to end up saying this a few times, but i think that it's cute that before MC 'breaks' there are little bits of yellow in his attire, as if he's still holding on the the hope that comes with dreaming. It also makes sense that the MV is called 'Insomnia' as the MC is struggling to 'fall back asleep', to return to dreaming as he was when he was a child - again going back to how his waking design is mostly deep blue/black as he lost it. Blue/black = Being awake + reality, Yellow = Being asleep + things pertaining to fantasy)

Really like (is like the right word for this?) that his younger self is a bit of a brat and we can see that from a young age he's had a deep distain for people, already dehumanizing them as fragile things to be destroyed for fun (and i understand why he would as indicated later in the MV)... Although he never grew out of that perspective (in fact it's gotten worse) it seems he's learned to at least control the impulse to destroy

The first loop around we see things from his balloon perspective, not really viewing people as human, the second time around (after his reoccurring memory-dream thing) the people are actual people, and we can see the actual destruction caused by enacting his childhood fantasy - but judging by his reaction to the news he wasn't aware of that at all. We were viewing that scene from the outside perspective, as implied by the fact we can't see his zingai leading him out while he's sleepwalking. I think that's a super cool detail

During the climax (where MC fully breaks lol) we can see yellow balloons floating into the air, which i think is a bittersweet moment. Like MC is finally able to view people as people while he's awake but it took confronting his inner child and getting hit by a truck to do that :(

I think that MC also has distain for his younger self as seen in the climax... like he doesn't want to be the type of person that carries out his fantasies anymore... he just wants his Zingai

He's clearly a deeply troubled guy but the fact that he cares enough to let himself rot and not anyone else is sorta sweet... from a character perspective, anyway. I understand the feeling

someone in the comments on yt also hc'd that the person that was crumbling up the newspaper near the end was Otogiri, as: A.) The sleeves match, and B.) he tried to call mc earlier but he declined, and he ends up seeing him later in prison/recovery...

So he might have been crumbling up the paper in frustration with him... i think it's really neat... and sort of endearing in a way? Like I can almost hear Tobi thinking 'Why didn't he listen to me??? He should've listened to me... now look at the mess he's in. Making me do more work to bail him out...'

I think those are all my biggest thoughts haha. I could do a frame by frame analysis of this series, it's so good. Understanding Japanese would probably make this a lot easier to do, but the fact I was able to get all of this just from watching is incredible enough, Mariyasu did an excellent job. Thanks for reading~

[slasherberry-shortcake]

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･You Mean The World⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ (RZ Michael x GN! Reader)

Hi all :]

This is the first fic that I'm uploading on Tumblr! It's kind of self-indulgent, as I personally absolutely love RZ Michael, but y'know, I'm also doing it for you guys! Let's get into it, loves~ (written in 2nd person)

NOT PROOFREAD AND FEM DNI PLEASE

:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ

It was a cold night, one that you hadn't felt in a while. You stayed cozy in your home, your large boyfriend curled up on the couch in front of the fireplace. You'd attempted to cover the man with a blanket earlier, but to no avail, as the fabric ended up slipping off of his body. You felt his comfortable aura warm you, your gleaming eyes staring softly at the one whom you loved. You longed to run to him where he lay, kiss all over to wake him up. To spend time with him, the time you so desperately craved. Your love was pure, and you felt so complete just staring at him. His chest rose and fell, the deep sound of his sleeping breath lulling you deeper into the sense of love you knew so well. Hesitantly, you stood, silently sweeping to the armrest of the couch, falling gently to your knees to play with the man's tangled and curled hair. As you lay your delicate fingers within his locks, he stirs, a deep exhale snapping you back to your senses, ripping you back from the rose-colored world you found yourself lost in, again and again. He tilted his head upwards to gaze at you, him being slightly annoyed by the rude interruption of his slumber.

You lifted yourself from the floor, laying a gentle and sweet kiss on his sweaty forehead, "Good morning, beautiful. How are you feeling?" He grunted gruffly in response, watching groggily as you wiped the salt from your lips.

"You're dirty," you whispered, watching the sweat that dripped down his throat turn a muddy brown from the dirt that clung to his skin, "You should shower, I can help."

These offers were common, your love inspiring you to tend to the needs of your lover, wanting to keep him in the perfect condition for when he rests at home. Sure, dirt covers the scent of a clean soap here and there, but this wasn't a hunt. This was your quality time, the time you loved to keep him all to yourself. You often request to bathe him, as you love watching the way the steam relaxes the tall man, the way his tension and high walls crumble down to your soft touch.

He glanced at you, a playfully offended look hidden in his eye. He knew what you had meant by the comment, but he liked to tease you. He liked watching you squirm, watching you scramble and gulp. He did it out of love, of course, he could never actually be offended or hurt by you. You both cared for each other too much for that to happen. HE sat up, his sitting figure even towering over you. He nodded and stood, grabbing your hand and dragging you to the bathroom.

You helped him undress and sink into the steaming bath water, your eyes drifting to his pectorals. You never used this as an excuse to peek at his body, well...not usually, but today was different. You wanted to soak in his features, feel the warmth in your cheeks grow as his large hands brace himself on the edges of the tub, a deep and low growl exiting his chapped lips. You blushed slightly, planning to excuse it as the steam if Michael questioned it. You smiled and got the body wash, saying in a soft tone, "Ready, Mikey?"

The man nodded, watching you lather the loofa that you had bought specially for him. Your hands moved sluggishly, twitching as you reached his chest. He exhaled at your touch, his form slumping in pleasure. You worked his chest with the soap, fingers helping to scrub at the man's fuzzy chest. Your nails created a lovely friction upon his skin, causing another exhale and more slumping. You were better than he remembered.

After finishing his body, you moved to his hair, scratching his scalp lovingly as you shampooed his dirty blonde hair. His body was as submerged as possible for a man of his stature, his head almost lulling into the now soapy and dirty water. He breathed in and out, his chest shaking with every pleasurable scratch you gave to the soft skin of his scalp. You rinsed the bubbles away, squeezing out the water from his hair. You stood from your position, waiting for him to stand and exit the tub. You held your hand out, giving him something to grasp though you didn't help him all that much (he certainly appreciated it regardless). He stepped onto the bath mat, a habit you wish he would not be used to. You always asked him to dry himself first, but he always seemed to forget. You held up the towel to him, kissing the hand that gently stole the cloth away from your grasp. He dried himself off on the bath mat, water splashing onto the tiled flooring, causing you to giggle softly.

After Michael was dry, you handed him the pajamas you'd picked to give him, the soft fabric guaranteed to keep him warm tonight. "Was that a good bath, angel?" you asked him, your eyes half-lidded as he dressed himself. He glanced at you, nodding his head slowly. You knew he was sincere with the slower nods he gave, and the low grunts and groans he'd slip in from time to time. It was adorable that you memorized his tells, it made you feel proud of yourself and your ability to read the man like a book.

After he dressed, you grabbed his hand, practically dragging him back out to the couch in front of the stone hearth. You snuggled into his side, inhaling the sweet scent of the soap that clung to his now-cleansed body. His big arm draped around your smaller shoulders, a soft kiss placed on your scalp soon afterward. The sweet aroma and the warmth of his body and the fire lulling you to sleep.

"I love you, Michael," you whispered, falling asleep nestled into his side, "I love you. so much."

[mcyt-enthusiast]

MCYT incorrect quotes my beloved:

Tango: WHO ATE MY BREAD?!

Tango: I'M GOING TO K-

Zedaph: I did?

Tango: Kiss you and buy some more, you haven't been eating anything today Zedaph.

*walking away*

Zedaph:

Zedaph: He's gone Impulse.

Impulse, coming out the closet with bread stuffed in his mouth: Twankh uh!

Jimmy: I can do anything I put my mind to. I once figured out Joey's phone number just by choosing random numbers.

Lizzie: Joel likes to win. When he was 8, a little Club Scout friend of his bragged that they could sell the most cookies.

Lizzie: Damned if Joel didn't walk the neighborhood till he got blisters on his feet, and won by 10 boxes.

Lizzie: Best part is, Joel wasn't even a Club Scout.

BDubs: What's the straightest thing you've ever done?

Etho: *sighs*

Etho: I killed a man.

Doc: You either buckle down and do your work or you'll end up at McDonalds.

BDubs: We're going to McDonalds if I don't do my work?

Doc: NO-

Doc: So are you gonna explain how the hell you crashed my car?

Grian: Well we were driving and there was a deer in the road, so I said "Scar, deer!"

Doc: ...And what did Scar do?

Grian: ...He said "Yes, Honey?"

Scott: I don't want to fight you!

Jimmy: I wouldn't want you to fight me either!

Teacher: Your child was in a fight.

Scar: Oh no, that's terrible!

Grian: Did they win?

Shelby: So, are you two friends?

Joey: Yes.

Katherine: No.

Jimmy: I'm in love with you.

Scott: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.

Jimmy: I know.

Scott: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-

Oli: Can I offer you a nice stick in this trying time?

Shelby: Ooh, somebody has a crush

Jimmy: Pfft, I don't have a crush on Scott I just think he's cool, it's not like I stay up at night thinking about him.

*Later that night*

Jimmy, very much awake: Uh oh.

Jimmy: Where is Tango?

Etho: I'll do you one better, who is Tango??

Scott: Here's a better question, why is Tango?

Xisuma: Y'know, maybe things aren't so bad. I'm here. I got the nice ocean breeze. Just alone with my thoughts.

Grian: Hey, Xisuma.

Xisuma: GODDAMNIT!

Mumbo: Did it hurt when you fell-

Grian: From heaven? Wow, I didn't think you were such a flirt-

Mumbo: No, I meant when you fell down the stairs.

Grian: ...

Mumbo: You just laid there for 15 minutes.

Tango: What's your biggest fear?

Mumbo: That I'll never be good enough for anyone.

Scar: Everyone hates me and talks about me behind my back.

Grian: Zombies.

Mumbo: ...

Scar: ...

Grian: BUT they can open doors.

BDubs, rushing into the room: It's terrible, just terrible! I am so upset!

Impulse: BDubs, honey, sit down! Sweetheart, tell us all about it. Etho, would you get BDubs some water?

Etho: What is he gonna do with water? Has water ever made you feel better when you were upset? Have you ever heard anyone say, "Thank God, the water's here!"?

Tango: Jimmy likes to say 'you can be part of the problem or part of the solution,' but I happen to believe you can be both.

Ren: Where are you going?

Etho: Hell, eventually.

Lizzie: *Talking to Joel* Oh, hi. I didn't see you there. Welcome to my abode. I'm glad you could join me.

FWhip: But this is my abode.

Lizzie: ...

Lizzie: Welcome to my abode, I'm so happy to have you, guest.

Impulse: I think we can all agree I'm the ten amongst these threes.

Jimmy, very tired: Can I sleep in your bed?

Scott: *half asleep* Jimmy, this is a queen-sized bed. That means it's for *gestures vaguely to himself* queens.

BigB: Hey Cleo, can you give me the opposite of these words?

BigB: Always, Coming, From, Take, Me, Down.

Cleo: Never, Going, To, Give, You-

Cleo: The satisfaction.

Martyn: The next time I open up to someone, it'll be my autopsy.

Martyn: Hey, do you know the password to Cleo's computer?

Scott: Screw you, Martyn.

Martyn: Hey!!

Scott: No, you misunderstood, the password is "screwyouMartyn".

Martyn: Oh, no numbers? Not very safe.

Pearl: Real life should have a search function, or something.

Pearl: I need my socks.

FWhip: So you like cats?

Sausage: Yeah.

FWhip: *tries to impress him by slowly pushing a glass off the table*

FWhip: My life is a little too much panic and not enough disco.

Scott: My life is a little too much fall and not enough boy.

Jimmy: My life is a little too much chemical and not enough romance.

Oli: My life is a little too much imagination and not nearly enough dragons.

Doc, about Etho: He's speaking some kind of French.

Ren: Let me handle it. I speak Spanish. It's the same thing.

Impulse: You call yourself my soulmate, but where were you when my meme only had four likes?

Tango: Making four accounts.

Impulse, tearing up: Really...?

Jimmy: *yawns*

Scott: Yeah, being that pretty must be tiring.

Jimmy: Then you must be exhuasted.

Joey: Will you two shut up? Some of us are lonely.

Scar, to Mumbo: If BDubs doesn't say "I'm King of the world" within an hour on that boat, I will give you my next pay check.

BDubs, within 5 minutes of getting on the boat: I'M KING OF THE WORLD!!!

Lizzie: Joel annoyed me today so I told him that I can't wait to see what he has planned for our special day tomorrow.

Gem: There is nothing special about tomorrow.

Lizzie: But there is something special about watching the color leave his face as panic takes over.