#wylan? i think he and jesper should kiss personally

[eatsbooks]

why tf did i wait so long to start six of crows after finishing the shadow & bone trilogy ??? i’m devouring this shit

[queenofspades6]

Greatest Investment | Kaz Brekker x reader

Summary: You eavesdrop on Kaz and Inej, you watched as they get closer, and well, it doesn’t go as planned…

Based on this request I received:

”Hiii! I haven't watched the second season yet, but I saw a Gif of a kiss (or almost kiss) between Kaz and Inej, and I was wondering if you would write about the reader having feelings for Kaz since they met, but she doesn't have the courage to talk, so at some point in the day she goes to check if Kaz needs anything and ends up witnessing the kiss (or almost kiss) between Kaz and Inej, and the reader feels like the silliest person in the world after that.”

Warnings: Angst. (Sorry…)

A/N: Hi! I hope you’ll enjoy what I wrote, I took some liberties since I was so inspired by the request!! I love some good angst! Did I use again in a Kaz Brekker fic title the word ‘investment’? Oops…I think meeting Freddy and Amita made me that way! They are so incredible!

———

Being Ketterdam’s most famous assassin wasn’t an easy life. You were one of Kaz Brekker’s Crows, always here if needed. Since you were part of the Crows, there was something unspoken between Kaz and you. There was some sort of tension from the beginning, even Nina and Jesper had noticed.

”How is the most beautiful woman in Ketterdam doing?“ Jesper asked, taking place to the bar counter next to you.

You rolled your eyes and repressed a grin.

“What do you want, Jesper?“

“Can’t I just compliment you without needing a reason?”

You stared at him meticulously, but Jesper couldn’t look back. Interesting. He needed to ask you something then...

“Fine! Fine! I need your help.“

You sighed but smiled.

”What? It’s not my fault, Y/N, if you give good advice! Don’t blame me!”

”Jesper, what do you need me for?“ You questioned, taking a sip at your drink.

“You see...“

Jesper was trying to avoid your gaze.

”Jesper. My patience has its limits.”

“Alright! Fine! I want to prepare a date for Wylan and I need your help.” He spitted, playing with his gun on his hand.

You nodded.

”I’ll help you. What do you need me for?“

”I don’t know what to plan. Maybe something he’ll like.”

You laughed, thinking about your previous conversation with Wylan about a sweet and wonderful place you both wanted to go to escape for once the cold streets of Ketterdam.

“Jes. You know what? Bring him to Butterfly’s Heaven, you declared, a smile already drawing on your lips at the thought, it’s a greenhouse where all the species of butterfly can fly freely. There’s also an endearing cafe there to drink something while watching the butterflies.” You replied, stars already dancing in your eyes thinking about all the marvelous butterflies.

“Do you think Wylan will love it?”

”Definitely! We talked about it all week, and he was desperate to go. You should bring him. He’ll love it. And buy him a stuffed toy, he’ll marry you right after.”

Jesper was smiling at the thought of Wylan asking his hand in marriage.

“Thank you, Y/N.”

“You and Wylan deserve to be happy.“

“What if it’s not enough, Y/N? What if I am not enough?” He opened up, not caring if he was vulnerable in front of you.

“You are enough, Jesper, you always have.”

You looked at him and smiled, hoping one day you’ll find someone that will care for you as much as Jesper wants Wylan.

“Wylan thinks you are enough, he loves you, Jes. And even Kaz knows it, even if he won’t ever admit it.”

You took another sip of the whisky in front of you and heard someone giggling.

”Hi Y/N!”

Wylan was embracing Jesper with his hands around his shoulders.

“Hi you.” Wylan said to Jesper.

Jesper didn’t even reply and kissed him tenderly as if he were the most precious thing in the world. And at that moment, you swore he were. They broke the kiss, and Wylan blinked several times as if to recover from the intensity of the kiss. It warmed your heart, even if you said nothing.

“What were you talking about?” Wylan asked, coming back to his senses.

Jesper almost jumped off his seat.

”We were talking about Y/N’s feelings for Kaz!“ Jesper answered spontaneously, too scared to reveal what he had planned.

”What? We were?” You almost spitted your drink on the counter of the bar. Now you were facing Jesper and Wylan. How dare he expose you like that?

”Oh seems interesting.” Wylan said, waiting for you to say more.

“There’s nothing between me and Kaz.”

Wylan looked at you wide-eyed, and Jesper sighed, before saying:

”Lie, Y/N. Haven’t you noticed how Kaz always checks on you after a heist, how you always have dresses, jewels, food, everything you want given to you for nothing in shops, you think it’s because of your fine looks? No. Even if you’re beautiful, Y/N, no offense! It’s Kaz’s doing. He made me went with him to each shop, each café, each place in Ketterdam you would want to go to pay, or should I say ‘bribe’ them for you to always have what’s best, no matter the cost.”

”That’s not true, that’s-”

”And what about this time you almost died, and he stayed at your bed an entire week, ordering every Dreg not to disturb him, and how you always have your tea and waffles ready for you every morning? Even Nina is jealous!” He confessed.

”I thought it was you or Wylan who was making me breakfast every morning!”

”It’s not.“ He muttered.

”He’s right, Y/N.” Wylan nodded. ”Even Nina told me last time about how his heartbeat jumped when you are in the same place, and how irritating it was for her to feel both of your heartbeats jumping when you’re together.”

“You should tell him how you feel, Y/N. You are the one who encouraged me to be with Wylan, because life is short, and in Ketterdam, death is always near. He cares about you, more than he’ll ever admit.”

”I don’t have feelings for Kaz fucking Brekker!” You almost screamed and avoided Wylan and Jesper’s gazes.

You took your glass of whisky and finished it all. The feeling of alcohol burning your throat almost soothed you.

”You do.” Jesper smiled and teased you.

”No, I don’t!”

Wylan rolled his eyes at his boyfriend’stuborness.

”Y/N! There you are, I thought you were with Kaz!”

You jumped off your seat. Fortunately for you, it was only Nina and not Dirtyhands himself.

”Nina, you scared the hell out of me.”

She grinned as if she had planned it all along.

”What are the three of you up to?“ She questioned, eyebrows raised.

"We are talking about Y/N’s feelings for Kaz.” Wylan answered before you could even speak.

”Not you too, Wylan!”

He smirked, almost shyly, and even if you wanted to blame him, you couldn’t blame his cute silly face.

”Hmmm, you and Waffles are not so discreet with your feelings.”

You sighed and tried to ignore Nina’s voice. You knew that if you listened to them, you would probably end up in Kaz’s office confessing your feelings for him, because on some missions, it became unbearable. The need to protect him, to check on him, how he could make you feel powerful and useless at the same time.

“Y/N. Heartbeats don’t lie.” Nina whispered to you, and you were sure Wylan and Jesper would not hear.

”Stop Nina. I- I- He’s not in love with me. Kaz Brekker can’t be in love. Love is a weakness, and I am only his latest investment.” You repeated, only to convince yourself of it.

“So how do you explain how his heartbeat go faster when you’re here, how I can feel his heart trying to get out of his chest when you’re injured. He cares. He tries to hide it, but the heart doesn’t lie. Never.”

You looked at her blue ocean eyes, and she caressed your shoulder in encouragement.

”Try to tell him, try to tell him you care, if only that. Love is a fragile thing, cherish it while it lasts.”

You swore you saw an ounce of sadness and regret flashing in her eyes as she remembered Matthias.

“I think you can help him with his past.” Nina muttered.

You looked at your empty glass, and noticed how your hands were trembling. Maybe they were right. Maybe it was time for you to tell him, that at least you cared for him. More than him being just your Boss.

You stood up, levelled up your chin, and took several steps towards Kaz’s office.

You were Ketterdam’s most notorious assassin, and you would not be afraid.*

You advanced towards the door slowly, you wanted to knock but the door was already ajar.

You could do it, you had done so much worse. You took a deep breath before-

You heard voices in his office. You heard him first, talking with a female voice, a voice you didn’t not recogn-

it was Inej’s.

Kaz and Inej were in his office talking. Your instinct was screaming at you to leave and come back later, but curiosity got the better of you.

You stayed, you tried to understand what they were saying, but you couldn’t. Slowly the most slowly possible you pushed the door and waited. Kaz and Inej were still talking, you took it as a sign they didn’t hear your presence. You weren’t Ketterdam’s best assassin for nothing. You took a silent step and looked at Kaz’s office.

You didn’t expect what you saw.

Kaz and Inej were close, too close for your liking, dangerously close. Too close that any of them could bear. So how was it they were here, almost touching each other. You swore Kaz could feel Inej’s breathing on his chin.

Watching them so close together made your heart beating faster. You wanted to scream but no sound came. No explanation came to your mind. Why was Inej here? You tried to focus on the words you heard, but none of them made sense. You were near but you couldn’t hear them clearly, it was as if your brain didn’t want you to eavesdrop. You heard some words like ‘crows’ and ‘family’.

You pushed the door again, without a sound. You leaned on the door and focused on the voices.

“Inej.”

You heard Kaz’s voice as it broke, and you needed to take a glimpse at what was going on right now. You took a deep breath and looked at them. Kaz’s gloved hand was on Inej’s shoulder. They were staring at each other like nothing else mattered in the entire world. Even if you were not close, you could decipher Inej’s surprise at Kaz’s sudden touch.

”Let me go, Kaz.”

Kaz removed his hand, and an ounce of sadness and rejection passed on his face.

“We need you, here.“

You watched as Inej shooked her head.

“Stay, Inej. Stay. Please.”

Her name sounded as a prayer in Kaz’s lips.

”I can’t, Kaz, and you know why.“ She whispered.

“We need you, Inej, please. We- I... I need you.“

Without noticing, Kaz caught Inej’s arm with his gloved hand, preventing her from leaving.

You couldn’t see them clearly; the door was blocking your path. You tried to lean on a bit further but failed miserably. Why did you push your luck? Your whole body had been trembling the whole time, even with the multiple tries to steady your heartbeat and calm yourself. The door opened slightly, and your face was greeted by the floor.

All you felt was numbness, shock and realization. Kaz and Inej were staring at you in wonder. You could already feel Kaz’s grave gaze at you.

“What? Did you never see someone fall before?“ You questioned, trying to hide your discomfort.

Feeling ashamed, you stood up awkwardly and crossed Kaz’s eyes.

“Y/N.“ Kaz declared.

You nodded.

“It’s not what you think.” Inej replied immediately, trying to maintain her composure.

Kaz was leaning on his cane, and his eyes never left your form.

”Don’t worry, I didn’t see anything. I won’t tell a soul. Keep going. I am leaving right now.” You gestured to the door and fled.

”Y/N, wait.“ Kaz said.

You ran through the Crow Club, not caring what the Dregs thought.

”Y/N!” Jesper screamed, hoping to catch your attention.

Why were you running?

Kaz followed after you, even if his leg hurt. He tried to, but you were too fast for him. After all, you were an assassin. A clumsy one at that...

You didn’t care. You ran until your lungs couldn’t bear the feeling, until your knees broke under the weight of your exhausted body. But where could you go in Ketterdam? A place where no Dreg could ever find you.

You knew the perfect place.

Months ago the Crows had gone on an heist with your help. The goal was simple, Kaz had said: ‘we enter, we take the painting, and we leave unnoticed’. He had insisted on the word ‘unnoticed’ looking specifically at Jesper. You had agreed to help them steal the damn painting if it pleases them. Truth be told you couldn’t say no to more Kruge. When you entered the grim manor Kaz had depicted, you noticed how silent and peaceful it was. No soul lived here. Was it the place where the painting was hidden? Maybe Kaz had made a mistake. But he had confirmed it was here. The manor was abandoned long ago by a duke trying to escape his demons. That’s all Kaz had told you, and you hadn’t asked for more at the time. Now you wished you had, because you were headed towards the old manor. A place where just the ghosts could disturb you. Ghosts were better than men, right? Better than some Bastard of the Barrel.

It could be the only place where you could scream and cry without someone noticing Ketterdam’s best assassin being vulnerable. Sometimes being the greatest assassin was a weakness, a weakness you couldn’t afford. It meant never showing too much emotion, never crying in front of your enemies... Wait. Was Kaz your enemy?

You didn’t know anymore. Falling in love was a weakness. Something not allowed in the dangerous streets of Ketterdam, a feeling that would destroy everything if not careful. In fact, love was a weapon, and if not used with parsimony and care, it could kill you.

You broke in the manor, remembering the precise path you used last time and found the closest room, the one you had discovered and found surprisingly pleasing. And strangely peaceful.

You closed the door, and sat on the floor, your body curled up, hands around your knees. You tried to forget the memories with the Crows and Kaz, but it was too much. You remembered your times with Jesper talking about guns, the hours eating waffles and ice cream with Nina, the walks with Wylan, the looks of approval coming from Matthias, and this cane... The cane you would never forget, even if you wanted to. You remembered the day when you had ended up wounded after eliminating a slaver. You were injured, sitting on the cold pavement. You were trying to catch your breath before escaping, but you had felt a soft but firm tap on your thigh. And without looking, you knew who it belonged to.

It was the Bastard of the Barrel.

He wanted you to think he was invisible, and unpredictable, but what he didn’t know was that long before killing the man, you knew Dirtyhands had followed you.

“Enjoyed the show, didn’t you?” You had questioned, showing your white teeth that must have been covered in blood.

That was the day when he had asked you to join the Crows, and since you had nothing more to do, you had accepted, already thinking about the free drinks you would benefit at the Crow Club.

You also remembered the day when you had wanted to leave the Crows because of some decision Kaz had made. You were angry and had prepared everything to leave in the morning. However, Kaz had watched you wrapping your clothes with a spectacular meticulousness, and had whispered:

“Stay. Stay in Ketterdam. Stay with me, Y/N.”

And you had stayed. Of course. When Dirtyhands asked you to stay, you stay. The morning he had woken up at dawn in case you wanted to leave without saying goodbye. He had found you in your usual attire, your knives and guns on your waist.

“You did not leave?”

He had asked, almost as a prayer.

”No. Something keeps me in Ketterdam.”

Kaz had said nothing, but you swore you had seen a grin on his lips this day.

You also remembered the day when you had been badly injured to save Nina from a fatal injury. You had been severely hurt; you weren’t even able to stand up. You remember watching the pitiful looks of the Crows at your broken body sprawled on the ground. Deep down you knew you were now a liability for the Crows, and especially for Kaz, so you had told them to leave you here, and escape before the men you had stolen from were back. You knew the risks and costs of each heist, and already accepted your fate.

Kaz had none of it. He had ordered Matthias to carry you, while Nina would tend to your wound as much as she could and control your heartbeat. Jesper would protect your backs, while Inej was sent to scan the path, and look for any danger. You would never forget the look Kaz had given you when he told you to rest for months if needed and had given you a room close to his own in the Crow Club.

Later, you had asked him why he had saved you instead of leaving you to perish. He had said with conviction:

”We are Crows, Y/N, we never leave our own behind.”

That was all of his qualities and flaws that made you love Kaz Brekker. He was broken, but you had always been a sucker for broken things to tend to. You had offered him everything an assassin could possess: your loyalty, your weapons, your ability to kill, and your heart, ready for the taking...

But now you remembered the sentence Dirtyhands had told you a week ago, telling you all you had to know about what you were to him, and what you could be.

”You’re my greatest investment, Y/N. Don’t fail me. “

He had told you once what you were to him, but you hadn’t listened, you had fallen in love, and now you knew. You knew you had always been an expensive investment, but only that, nothing more.

You had been his greatest investment, and that was all...

———-

Tell me what you thought about this one! I am seriously considering writing a part 2! Likes, shares and comments are appreciated, it makes my day, I really need it!

———

If you liked this fanfiction, you’ll love this one, it also has the word ‘investment’ in the title like this one:

⬇️ ⬇️

[iliveinyourceiling65]

SoC incorrect quotes

part three I guess. Idk what else to post 😭.

Kaz: I am not out of control! I'm a law abiding citizen!  Inej: Really? Name one law  Kaz: Don't kill people?  Inej: That's on me. I set the bar too low.

Jesper: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it. Inej: Jesper no. Kaz: Mistlefoe. Inej: Please stop encouraging him.

Jesper: Am I in trouble? Colm: Take a guess. Jesper: No? Colm: Take another guess.

Jesper: If I die, my funeral is going to be the biggest party ever and you’re all invited  Inej: If?  Wylan: Great, the only party I’ve ever been invited to and he might not even die.

Jesper: Hey Inej, Inej: Yes? Jesper: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it’s on? Inej: Inej: Where’s Nina?

Jesper: What did you do with matthias’s body? Nina: What didn’t I do with the body? Jesper: Nina: Okay, that sounded more sexual than I intended. I disposed of the corpse respectfully.

*Wylan and Jesper sitting in jail together* Jesper: So who should we call? Wylan: I’d call Kaz, but I feel safer in jail

Matthias: *Screams* Kaz: *Screams louder to establish dominance* Nina: Should we do something? Inej: No, I want to see who wins.

Wylan: You lying, cheating, piece of shit! Jesper: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD Wylan: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING NINA WITH ME Inej, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.

[wh0refornikolailantsov]

Song: I will wait for you- mumford and sons

“After a long, hard and lonely day: he can finally be in your arms again.”

Reader x ….

Options: Nikolai, Matthias, Kaz, Tolya

Hear me out, Matthias and Kaz, one established relationship, one pining because apparently I want to feel pain. xoxo.

This Action Echos - Matthias Helvar , Kaz Brekker.

Content Warnings: Unrequited Love Trope. Not Beta/ Proof Read. Love Confessions At Inconvenient Times. Kaz Opening His Mouth. Explicit Language.

Your legs are resting up beside you on the chaise longue in the back of the club, hiding away in the back room, awaiting for the crows to return.

Being benched wasn't something you were taking personally, you knew that Kaz had run the odds, and you were better suited to staying back, but it didn't stop you worrying about them all. Nothing could stop you worrying about them all.

The waiting is unbearable, and you have nothing that successfully fills your time, allowing you to stop yourself thinking about all the things that could be going wrong. You trusted them all implicitly, they've all gotten themselves out of situations they never should have survived, far too many times to think they were anything short of lucky. But you cannot help but linger on the way Matthias likes to suggest their luck will not last forever, that eventually it has to run out. But it has become easy to believe they were charmed, your little family of misfits and renegades. It would be easier for you all to go down together than believe any one of you could fall alone.

Your heart jumps, threatening to push it's way out of your chest and greet them before your feet can pull you to the door, when it opens. Jesper is the first through the door, cracking the end of a joke. "You waited, that's sweet of you darling, were you worried about me?" he smirks.

"Always, what if you miss a shot?" you tease, pulling him into a hug.

"You wound me more than any enemy when you say things like that," he returns your hug, squeezing you that little bit tighter to let you know he missed you, and he was worried, even if he wouldn't admit it.

"No, you could never miss," Wylan quips. "You can shoot perfectly, but your timing, that could leave something to be desired." Wylan gives your arm a small squeeze as he passes, giving you time to pull away from the caring embrace of the now scowling Zemeni.

"Play nice lover boys," Nina says. She cups your face in two hands and plants a kiss on your nose. "We could've done with you on that one." She tells you, not to make you feel bad for your absence but to assure you of your presence, and you appreciate it. All the little ways Nina makes you feel loved, makes you feel like you belong, you appreciate them all.

You don't get a chance to turn around to see him before strong arms are engulfing you in a hug from behind. You lean back into it, the familiar smell, that reminds you of woodlands and fresh snow fall, filling your space. His coat is cold, but you can feel the warmth underneath it the tighter he holds you. "Matthias," you smile, tilting your head back to look up at him.

"Wild one," he replies, but there is a smile in the corner of his lips, not able to keep the stoic seriousness in his face.

"Did you miss me?" you ask.

"Every moment I was away," he tells you.

"I kind of miss when he didn't talk so much," Jesper says, pulling himself onto the desk to sit down.

You throw Jesper a warning look, it had taken far too long, and so much to get Matthias to where he was now, comfortable enough in his self and in the changes, in the challenges and the story that brought him here, to Ketterdam, to you, and always from a life he had always known and understood, for Jesper to make him doubt his progress for even a second. "Adawesi?" You challenge him.

Jesper laughs but backs down without a further comment.

Kaz looks less than pleased joins the gathering. "Inej decided to do some reconnaissance, and figure out where we are now in the situation," Kaz explains, not bothering to greet you.

He gives you a side glance, making his way to the back of the room. You're standing, Matthias's arms still around your body, laughing at something that Kaz does not understand or recognise as being funny at all.

You give him a small smile and he just eyes you before taking his seat.

"Jesper, as promised you can have your drinks, Nina, you can have your rest, Wylan, you can have your peace, and Matthias... what did you want again?" Kaz asks.

"I asked for nothing Demjin," Matthias says, finally taking his arms from around you, to stand taller. Of all the things that have changed, all the distance crossed, Matthias hasn't budged once in his dislike and distrust of Kaz Brekker. Matthias watches him, silent prayers to Djel that the demon in the suit across from him cannot sense his discomfort. He may have come to accept that his tricks are human, but he is yet to believe that Kaz himself is anything less than demonic.

"Right, it's all honour with you," Kaz says, looking down at some papers on the table. "Then I suppose you're all dismissed."

"Kaz I need a word," you remind him, you'd tried to ask him about a job before they left and Kaz had brushed you off, saying it could wait, you'd made him say he would speak to you as soon as he returned, that he understood this was important. He said he would. Now he was looking right through you.

"Right," he says, "can it wait?"

"It has waited," you tell him, "you don't scare me enough to be able to brush me off like that Brekker."

Nina, Wylan and Jesper make a quick exit at that statement, Wylan giving you a good luck nod as he ducks down and out of the room.

"So can I have your time or do I need to be a stolen painting?" you ask. You could fool yourself into thinking for a glimpse of a moment, Kaz almost smiles. He exhales and nods. You lean up on tiptoes and plant a kiss on Matthias's cheek. "I won't be long."

"Can I get you something?" he asks, not really wanting to leave you alone with Kaz but respecting that you can handle yourself well enough.

"I would love something sweet to eat," you tell him. His shoulders bump up slightly as he stifles a chuckle.

"I'll ask Nina," he says, pressing a kiss to the top of your head before leaving.

Kaz looks up at you, expectant. Waiting. His impatience clear on his tight lips. "What is it?"

"I want in on the job with Specht," you tell him. Something almost sets alight behind those dark eyes of his.

"No," he says plainly. You cross your arms, watching him but he goes back to his papers. "Is that all?"

"No," you tell him, "I want in on the job, he said himself he could use me."

"Then maybe I should have words with him about undermining me, I will tell him who is good for a job," Kaz spits.

"Boss, you keep side lining me," you say, "I thought maybe it was not a personal thing, but this is a piss easy job with the opportunity to work so much in the favour of The Dregs in Fifth Harbour, why won't you let me do this?"

"Go home," Kaz tells you, "go home, rest. Be comfortable in your safety, your friends made it home, your Fjerdan made it home, all is well," he sits up straighter in his chair. "So go home, enjoy your luxuries, convince Matthias that each day in Kerch is better than whatever life you could have in Fjerda, remind him of all the reasons not to miss his home, make him cheerful and fall asleep in his arms. If you really wish to do me a favour maybe convince him to stop looking at me like I might grow wings at any given point, or better yet, stop asking me about jobs, when I have one for you, you will have it."

You want nothing more than to go home to Matthias, to forget about everything that is needed and required from you, to simply curl up and be warm and happy with the man you love. But this was not about Matthias, this was not about your happiness, or your comfort, this was about Dirtyhands keeping you from your place. Besides you've never known Kaz to really care for your happiness in any regard, it took so much bargaining to get his help on the smallest of things, time and time again. Kaz was a business man before he was ever a friend to you. You knew that. He was your boss, and he rarely let there be moments when he felt like he was anything more. While the rest of the crows valued the companionship that came with this band of broken dolls, but Kaz, Kaz cannot help but keep everyone at arms length, in a metaphorical sense as much if not even more than the literal sense.

"You want me to leave," you state, eyeing him. "What is your problem with me... I thought... What is your problem?"

"I have no problem, except insubordination," he states. "How go on, hurry and catch up with your Drüskelle-,"

"Do not talk of Matthias in that tone," you snap, "he is more than you could ever hope to be Brekker and yet you talk of him with such dishonour, why because he has faith? Because he has purpose? Because he dares to love?"

“After a long, hard and lonely day: he can finally be in your arms again.” Kaz's words shouldn't strike you as so painful, and yet they do, it feels like he has pressed that oyster shucking knife from his sleeve right into your throat and was twisting it. "I can't give you that. And I doubt I ever will be able to."

"Kaz... what are you saying?" you ask. You'd expected anger, you'd been looking for a fight, but Kaz does not look like he wishes to fight, he doesn't even raise his voice, he takes a simple breath and then speaks.

"That if I was a different man, a better man, a man who had not been ruined and broken years before I ever got the chance to know you, I might just have been able to be the man that you need, the man I wish I was able to be, but know I will never become, even for you, I am not able, and I will not lie to either of us that I am. I am, and I can only ever be Dirtyhands, Bastard of The Barrel, and that is what you need of me more than you will ever need me to be the man I wish I was for you. So no, I do not... dislike Matthias, it is not that I dislike him, it is not that he is the enemy, Drüskelle, or Fjerdan. It is not that he does not deserve you, it is simply that I do not."

Kaz leaves without giving you a chance to respond. Not that you have a clue how to respond. You had never had the smallest inclination that Kaz had feelings for you at all. You were barely aware Kaz has feelings. Your mind is spinning. Unsure what you're supposed to do with this information.

You wait in the empty room, the door still open from his exit, the tapping of his cane disappearing into the noise of the club.

You take a moment, and you bring yourself back, to the moments before Kaz threw a match on everything. For all the shock, you remind yourself it doesn't matter. Kaz's reasonings for trying to keep you from your work were unspoken, he intended to spin you out with a confession that you did not need to hear. It had worked and that annoyed you most. You would not let him side line you for feelings he never deigned to suggest he ever had before. You would make him take you seriously, his feelings be damned. But you'd had a long day, and more prevalently, Matthias has had a long day, so you will find him, the man who you love, the man who would fight wars and change the world for. You were going to return to him, enjoy your treats and your calmness and his presence and force Brekker's words from your mind. Matthias who you had been waiting on all day, who kept your mind occupied with thoughts of him always. Matthias who you would always wait for, always go to. Your Matthias. You would not let Brekker ruin the calm, not for you, and not for Matthias, no matter his feelings. You couldn't let it.

[cawcawbeech]

SIX OF CROWS AND KISSING !!

(Welcome to this silly but intricate guide nobody asked for)

Just so everybody knows and is fully aware, I literally never kissed anybody in my whole damn life. I dont much care to try (for now) unless your name is Amita fucking Suman (jkjk, or not), but that doesnt mean I didnt do some very extensive research on the topic just so I can write what are hopefully non-generic scenes where all of my favorite characters make out till the following sunrise without a single other thought plaguing their empty little minds (exception being if the said thought is used to deepen 'the plot').

Before I say much else, I would like to note that THIS is just a very detailed bullet point list on kissing for all of my boys and girls separate of their partners assigned to them in canon or by the fandom. We will get to how it would actually go in different scenarios with different ships a bit later on if I decide it wont be a waste of my time. PS: No, not every kiss / kisser has to be extraordinary or unique or have whatever traits I ended up slapping on these characters here, Im just extra like that. And its not like anybody can stop me. Deal with it and simply enjoy (whatever this may be)!

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JESPER LLEWELLYN FAHEY

Jesper has had his fair share of practice in this particular field, we all know it. That is no reason to say that he is a perfect kisser, there are many who have done way more, constantly brag about it, and yet still leave you disappointed. But, this is Jesper we are talking about. Kuwei has said that he is a great kisser too, I choose to trust him on that. That joke he made to cheer up Wylan at Olendaal, the one about kissing Nina / Matthias 'with tongue', it doesnt have to mean anything, but I like to think he is a tongue kind of guy. I also like to think that he is adaptable to any type of person though, he aims to please through-and-through. It saddens me to look deeper, to think about how that may be a result of his low self-esteem, but in moments like these, it makes him happy most of the time, and it is all I could hope for when it comes to my boy.

The first relationship he had been a witness to, the one his mother and father shared before her death, had been a very healthy one. I wouldnt call Colm the perfect father, certainly not after his wife was gone, albeit he is significantly better compared to the hands the rest of our favourite characters have been dealth with, but he was good to Aditi. Most kids, including myself, were the type to be grossed out by PDA, especially when its between their parents, and while thats not in any way a bad thing, we can clearly see that Jesper was not of that type.

Despite his many faults, he was raised fairly well. He knows how to make a comfortable environment, to recognize a clear invitation, what to ask and what not to ask, what is acceptable and what he shouldnt do without a more in-depth discussion. He knows how to create and opportunity where one could deny him if they so wished. I wouldnt say its some overly high bar to jump over, if anything it is the most basic standard any and all should hold themselves to, but I call Jesper 'the consent king' for a reason.

Its said in the book that his mind empties when he kisses the right person, that thinking of methaphors clearly means something is wrong, but hes still pretty descriptive in his POVs if you ask me. Its also very clear that he likes to kiss deep, slow, and involve other sensations throughout which is the part where Id like to include some of my very own hcs (slight temperature / texture play where he drags his rings over skin, hair pulling is a given but I can see him also liking to touch peoples ears a lot, talking in between and whispering during the few subtly initiated pauses, etc). Jespers favourite type of kiss would probably be those he iniciates as soon as he wakes up in the morning. It rains often in Ketterdam, its normal, so he would also probably be one of the rare creatures among the regular Kerch citizens who finds kissing in the rain romantic.

KAZ BREKKER (RIETVELD)

Kaz will have to go through some major healing first, no doubts about that, but Id say he would probably be one of the elite members of the 'Im keeping my eyes open for this' club (until he isnt). I doubt he does much analyzing during, mentally he is on another planet thats probably many lightyears away as he tends to do with a lot of other even remotely intimate things, but theres lots of squinting, eyelid fluttering... Kaz is basically a personafication of that cliche 'when did I close them' quote. In my own experience, I can barely hold eye contact when talking, but I dont really see this as a bad trait. I also dont see it as a trauma response either like some would assume it would be for Kaz, I think its just a him thing. If this man didnt want to kiss somebody, you would not be kissing him, end of.

He likes to focus on teeth, whether by unconsciously (or consciously) biting his partner, having your teeth bump into each other, or licking his own after youre done. Theres lots of shuddering, youll feel him there more than youll hear him, but he is not completely silent either. I dont think he would like beeing cornered, picked up or lifted in any way except on very rare occasions. Just like the pulse thing where he feels for it on the wrist (or neck once he is more comfortable), feeling his weight including the pain of his leg serves to ground him. Perhaps he might also like feeling of you breathing through your nose on his face for the same reasons? He doesnt like leaving things unfinished, even if its just a peck, he will make sure it feels 'complete', I dont know how else to put it. If anybody could overuse the words "Again?", it would be Kaz motherfucking Brekker.

Im in no way saying he will be good, in fact, theres lots of traits here that many wouldnt like, but he tries when he wants to (and again, you would not be kissing this man if he didnt want it), he will learn and he will remember the smallest of details (so that he can ponder over them later). The only thing we hear about Kazs appearance related to his mouth is that there is a scar running through his upper lip. I never got it when people talked about kisses having a taste, but Kaz seems to often call people light-weight, so clearly, he handles his alcohol well, perhaps having developed such a habit to settle down his own supposedly non-existent nerves. It might not be the main reason, we heard about him being on the receiving end of many fights that in certain circumstances and with the ways they are handled lead to similar results, but liquor does leave one dehydrated and with chapped lips.

WYLAN VAN ECK (HENDRIKS)

Unless he is particulary fired up, Wylan likes to start slow and chaste no matter if you are the first, the thousanth person he has kissed or just a person he has kissed a thousand times. Unlike Kaz, he has some experience, sheltered kids know how to have fun in secret (and Im the last person who would ignore that 'lie' about him being kicked out for bedding the tutor, theres some truth to everything), but he is also nowhere near the level of Jesper or Nina or Matthias. We know he likes when his partner feels calm and like they are actually in their body before he goes in for the kill, we saw it with Jesper, but we also see that he isnt the type who needs to ask every time and will just do it when 'the time feels right'. Look out, he just might squeeze into your shirt while youre wearing it and do a makeshift 'surprise attack' from there if he is determined enough for it.

From that, we could say he might have some other habits, including but not limited to the familiar one of guiding his partner through breathing patterns. Maybe sometimes he likes to hold onto your forearms more tightly than necessary (not forcefully though), have your knees touch and bump into one another, straighten his own / your items of clothing, compare hand sizes while making weirdly-intense eye contact, use his thumb to subtly rub at a random tensed muscle, touch foreheads if he is tall enough or rub his face along the side of your neck, anything that would focus your attention to him and the moment... Ironically, as a follow up to the last point and as the kiss drags on, he forgets that he is an actual person who has a weight to them and has to lean back against something with the help of his partner before he falls down and cracks his goddamn skull open.

He likes to leave an effect on whoever he is kissing, but he also likes to 'clean up after himself' as much as possible after its done, which once again serves to bring both of you back down. So yeah, he would probably do something like twirling a stay peace of hair around his finger before neatly tucking it back in place, running that same finger across a brow, down the nose or along the jawline, nudging you playfully with his shoulder, hips or elbows, swaying a bit to slowly return the atmosphere back to relaxed as he secretely links your pinky fingers together. Lips would be his main focus, and he especially likes the soothing effect it has when he is sleepy, but he could also grow to like eyelid, nose, tummy or thigh kisses when it comes to placement.

INEJ GHAFA

Inej has had many men kiss her throughout her life, and unfortunately, theres no need to debate whether she truly enjoyed any of them. Oh how I would love to say that every shitty person is also shit at every other skill they try to master, however, that doesnt have to be the case. The fact that she was a brothel girl doesnt have to mean all of her kisses were bad (to specify, that refers to the technique). That being said, I think she would appreciate the message more than the way its done. It also might result in her not exactly caring about the placement of a kiss, palm, knuckles, hair, cheek, neck, lips, any of them would be equally as intimate to her, platonic or otherwise. Its somewhat similar to what Wylan also likes, but very different too once you look further.

As is with Kaz, you would not be kissing the Inej we know now unless she didnt want you to. I probably should have said this earlier, no, I dont mean that any of the other Crows would enjoy a kiss that was not what they wanted, they wouldnt ignore the signs and will fight the person off if needed, but I hope you understand why Im emphasizing it for these two in particular. I think her kisses would be short, but sweet, a petite little package that can deliver a punch under a right set of conditions, just like she can, the same going for her ship. Physically, we know her lips have an upturn to their shape. As is true with alcohol, salt water has the same drying effect that is only made worse by licking.

One other feature that might make Inejs kisses unique is a possibility of her aquiring more jewellery during her travels. I always imagined that the Suli find piercings to be very meaningful. Perhaps she had some since a very young age, perhaps they were taken from her too during her time at the Menagerie, maybe the holes closed naturally over the long months, maybe she got more whilst working for Kaz, and although it was not put there for such a reason, a lip ring (just as an example) has quite a pleasing effect for either side.

She holds a special appreciation for people who remember their first kiss, or at least remember their first kiss with her, a courtesy she will offer in return as well. It takes special kind of brave to get close (she knows better than most) and never lets the feat of overcoming fear go unappreciated. For some reason, I can see her counting the seconds, not for any reason at all. I wouldnt say its something particulary good nor bad, but Inej doesnt give me the 'let me kiss your words away' signals no matter the situation. The phrases that would fit more would be "We will get through this", "Stay strong, for you", "Lets face it together" or "We shall see each other once more". She seems like the type to keep her affairs secret, but at the end of the day, I also dont think she would mind PDA all that much.

KUWEI YUL-BO

I know the fandom likes to joke that Kuwei is the bad kisser between the two, seeing as to how Jesper was left 'disappointed' even before knowing the truth behind who he was actually kissing... But I dont think that had to do much with the kiss itself. We were told that Jesper liked Kuweis body plenty enough, but even if it were really Wylan (both in shape and spirit), Jesper wasnt in the right space, and Kuweis silence and mannerisms didnt do much to help.

Now, this is a personal headcanon, but one of the habits I think he might pick up in the Little Palace would be scratching his nose or covering his mouth before he goes in for a kiss. Or well, I like to imagine that being his tell among all the snarky comebacks, vicious flirting and sly glances. And seeing as to how playful he is with his powers and how much he grows to use them for mischief and otherwise in KOS, I like to think that his face is always warm to the touch as Kuwei himself is constantly touching it. Random instert, this man unironically likes lemons and you will without a doubt taste quite an assortment of teas while with him.

Some people care about the emotional setting, some like keeping it casual, and some like having that perfect mix of both. Kuwei might acknowledge that in different ways and act accordingly, but I also think he might care more about the physical setting and connect good actions with places rather than specific people or mutual feelings. This man is a certified tease, unless you pull him towards you which is exactly what he wants, he is 100%, absolutely ready to keep a partner on the edge of their seat, kiss the corner of their mouth, or maybe with the lips barely touching. Instead of licking his own lips out of habit or to seduce, he would lick yours. Kuwei being a tease might also be a way for him to set up walls? In a sense that hes reminding both himself and the person hes kissing that this is just a kiss and it doesnt mean anything. And when hes kissed by someone he loves and trusts, hes downright pathetic, super soft and annoyingly sweet about it.

I dont know where else to put it so it will have to be here, but I like to think he chewed on his lips a lot as a child and whilst in captivity, leaving him with barely visible indents once he reached adulthood. When it comes to the type, Id say he could end up enjoying goodnight kisses next to the fireplace or lit by the flame in his own hand more than he would like doing anything in the early morning. Kuwei tends to get frustrated and bored easily so that might lead to certain effects as well, more specifically the speed, angle and desperation. He has hid for long enough and doesnt much care about who sees what, only whether they got a nice view from wherever they were standing at the time.

NINA ZENIK

Nina has practiced CPR from a very young age (I wouldnt call any of those a true kiss by any means, but it will make slightly more sense in just a moment), we see her perform one on Kaz in the books without hesitation, so I doubt her first 'kiss' was particularly enjoyable or wholly consentual or that she even remembers it. Perhaps from that, her kisses would grow to be particulary breathy in the future, although that doesnt mean its some kind of rule or that its not just a result of her personality being put into how she goes about it. We already know temple kisses are her thing among some other stuff, but she also doesnt seem to have a similar kind of bond with any other type that is not at neck level or above. Shes fine with them, but always seems to go to certain spots herself when she has a choice, singing and laughing through all of it. As Matthias tends to say a lot, the chase is a game to her, whether on top or beneath, she still wins.

Her skin is said to be soft, and supposedly so are her lips, plus the girl is a Heartrender and that surely results in many privileges. Surprisingly enough, I wouldnt say she is particularly experienced in the world of romance, even if her talent at sweet-talking might suggest otherwise. Perhaps shes had flings, one or two, maybe even a relationship at some point, but I dont see much more in my visions of her backstory. "Dont you want to play with me?" and "Cant you handle it?" are some of the repeating phrases in her vocabulary, but oh, it only gets worse once she feels well and truly romanced, swept off her feet as one might say, and that takes lots of effort. Its a good thing we know Nina has some high expectations, that way all of us can be her personal wingmen.

If anybody could obtain the famous movie achievement of leaving a string of saliva to connect her lips with her partners for just a few more moments, it would be Nina. Speaking of such things, she may also be the only one for who the 'let me kiss you against this wall so that they dont spot us' scenario might actually work (in theory), or at least give her enough time to incapacitate them during their confusion since she tends to be quite loud appearance wise. Likes being attended to and coddled, and no kiss has a chance without a firm grab or two. Will die if you do a tango dip with her in your arms. She is one of the biggest fans of mistletoes and finds it extremely romantic. Sometimes, when she is invited to watch a play or show, she will turn around and kiss her partner whenever the actors do. "Consider me madly in love. With the kisses, not you. ... But maybe also you if you did it again."

MATTHIAS BENEDIK HELVAR

And finally, we have our romantic-at-heart of the group, Matthias. Now, his and Ninas romance is the most obvious and out-in-the-open throughout the whole duology, and frankly he is the one I had the most trouble with writing, but the difference between seeing their first kiss from Ninas perspective and the one of Matthias is that theirs was his first kiss ever. All of his actions leading up to it, as well as those after, are a promise in some way or another, and Im not only talking about his vow to her. Nothing could have prepared me for when he lifted Nina straight off her feet and held her there as he kissed her, yet it was also the most in-character thing he ever could have done.

Matthias will absolutely, every time, start an hour long conversation on what led him to this moment, if it is the right time, the right place, the right everything... He will continue up until he himself is basically internally shouting at his own mouth to shut itself (he has very low patience despite everything mentioned above) or his partner takes the initiative themselves. The second option is prefered by both parties and a 5-star whine is the expected plus-one to excellent service. He is the type to gulp when you get too close. Will go mad if you can tell when he is holding on by a thread despite his lack of many facial expressions, especially if told something along the lines of "Just lose control, love".

He is particularly sensitive for textures. All humans are to some extent, the lips have more nerve endings in them than fingertips, but Matthias is the one who is fullfilled by it the most and frequently says stuff related to it like "Are you wearing chapstick?" or "I can feel the dip of your scar". Often acknowledges indirect kisses. Matthias has once said that kissing isnt about romance, that it should be proper and only done as a follow up to a conventional Fjerdan courtship, and while lots about him has changed during his canonical relationship with Nina, I think he might still enjoy going through at least some of these with somebody who might appreciate his efforts. Matthias is still highly religious even if he is now seeing the world from another perspective and there are some cultural things that for him go deeper than just tradition. In a very specific headcanon of mine, he has grown up fantasizing about having to lift up your chin to do it, and so now he does so even with taller partners who can reach his mouth just fine.

He would 100% take the 'Will you love me if I was a worm' jokes way too seriously. "How am I supposed to handle a worm? I could hold a butterfly, maybe kiss you if you were a wolf (but thats after a very extensive inspection of your molars)". Kisses the back of your neck after putting on a necklace. Pretends that lipstick stains dont turn him on to the highest setting.

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[snowblack-charcoalwhite]

Do you ever think about the contrast between how rushed and carelessly Jesper kisses the stable boy in season one to how gentle and tender his is with Wylan and absolutely lose your mind?

Actually, I do, very much so:)

The tenderness - reverence, I dare say - with which Jesper treats Wylan is out of this world. The way he looks at him, touches him - like Wylan is something infinitely precious, something to be cherished and adored. Like Wylan is someone who should be loved. And, actually, IMO this is quite understandable because -

Jesper, as I mentioned in my previous Wesper rambling post, craves, practically aches to have love in his life. He wants to love someone and he wants someone to love him. He has that beautiful sibling-like bond with Inej who returns his love for her; he also has a brother in Kaz - but as we all know Kaz has major problems with reacting to affection and expressing one himself. He loved (and still loves) his mother, he loves his father, who no doubt will come into the picture in the show if the story continues. All these relationships are important to him - yet romantic love is something that he`d been missing for quiet some time. Until he met Wylan (meaning really met him and got to know him).

Even in the scene with the the stable boy it shows (courtesy of Kit Young`s incredibly deep and nuanced acting) that Jesper wants, yearns to find someone special, wants all the kisses and touches to actually mean something - something more than just scratching the itch ot receiving physical pleasure. It`s in the way he touches Dima, in the way he looks at him - he`s searching for that special thing, but he`s not finding it. That`s why it feels so rushed and messy (well, there`s also the fact the Crows are on a mission but still).

And then there`s Wylan. Beautiful, clever, kind Wylan: soft yet brave, shy yet sensual, fragile yet strong. Wylan who looks at Jesper Fahey - and wants Jesper Fahey. Not a tumble in the sheets with a handsome guy, not a bit of fun, not a distraction - he wants Jesper as he is. And Jesper senses it. It`s not that he falls in love with Wylan just because of the way Wylan feels about him - it`s that Wylan`s feelings for Jesper are a manifestation of his natural devotion, tenderness and kindness, and therefore an integral part of Wylan as a person. So, Wylan loving Jesper for who he is is a a mutual thing.

Looks like I got carried away, sorry about that😅 Thank you for the ask!

[metalandmagi]

Hello....If you don't mind me asking, who are your favorite romantic relationship's couples in books/ manga/manhwa/ anime/movies/tv series (can be canon or non-canon)? Why you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before....

Hope you don't mind if the same person ask a different questions. Thank you so much @metalandmagi .....

Funny you should ask, because I was just listening to a podcast episode about favorite fandom ships, and I had actually started making my own list that I was going to post anyway! And I don’t mind you asking, since I don't really have people to talk to about this stuff. I like looking at your blog and seeing other people’s answers too!

Here's my top ten! These are going to be kind of repetitive because I’ve already talked about these fandoms so much, but these are my favorite CANON SHIPS, meaning they’re actually together or at least have kissed or something. I have a million non canon ships.

10. Jem, Will, and Tessa from The Infernal Devices- I wanted to keep myself to one ship per fandom, but I couldn’t help it, I just love this OT3 so much. I don’t care what anyone says, they are a poly relationship, not a love triangle (and I maintain that if Jem wasn’t already dying, he and Will would have realized they loved each other romantically, and their parabatai bond would have fucked them over eventually). They all have an equal amount of love and respect for each other, and they balance each other so well. And I appreciate that none of them are relegated to being “the overly jealous partner who ruins everything for the other two.” We get time with each of them and love them all equally.

9. Patroclus and Achilles from The Song of Achilles- Call me a basic bitch, but these two are unparalleled in terms of doomed romances. I love friends to lovers, and the story is so widely spanning that it gives their relationship such gravitas.

8. Yona and Hak from Akatsuki no Yona- Still haven’t finished the manga, but these two are god tier for fantasy romances. I love that they completely lose their minds over each other whenever they are not within arm’s reach, and they’re another great example of childhood friends to lovers. Hak’s “teasing” attitude in the beginning of the series wasn’t my favorite, but it’s funny to look back on it later, knowing that he’s so in love with Yona and would murder the first person to disrespect her. 

7. Shigure and Akito from Fruits Basket- Because why would I choose one of the normal, healthy relationships when I could go for one of the most fucked up romances in shoujo? These two…I don’t even know where to start. They’re the definition of toxic for most of the series, but by the end, you’re really rooting for them to be together with the Sohma family curse broken. Shigure is desperate for the curse to be broken so he can prove to Akito that he loves her without them being tied together by fate. Akito feels like she needs the curse because otherwise everyone will leave her forever. Akito sleeps with Kureno. Shigure sleeps with her mom. They’re “gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss” meets “mansplain, manipulate, man-whore.”

6. Sasaki and Miyano from Sasaki to Miyano- What can I say? They’re just so freaking cute! I think they represent the romance a lot of people in fandom want, because they bond over manga and slowly come to learn more about each other. Sasaki never pressures Miyano to return his feelings, and I appreciate the patience he has in waiting for Miyano to give him an honest answer to his confession.

5. Jesper and Wylan from Six of Crows- Another basic answer, but these two are so entertaining whenever they’re together. I love that Jesper starts out teasing Wylan relentlessly about looking like a pampered rich kid (despite the fact that Wylan also lives on the streets), but Wylan deadass saves the group time and time again, so Jesper comes to respect him more. This is how you do teasing in a relationship: they get under each other’s skin but aren’t complete dicks to each other. And I appreciate that the Shadow and Bone show changes their dynamic slightly while keeping the chaotic duo the same at their core. 

4. Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase from the various Percy Jackson series- The pinnacle of middle grade/YA romance. Nobody else is doing it like these two. What works about their relationship is that we truly believe their friendship as 12 year olds before they start to have feelings for each other. So many times, authors shove two characters together because they feel like they need a romance, but Percy/Annabeth progress so naturally. They tease each other, but they know they’re both capable individuals at the end of the day (and their wildly different brands of intelligence work so well), and as long as they’re together, they can get through anything.

3. Hua Cheng and Xie Lian from Heaven Official's Blessing- I’ve shipped these two for much less time than these other ships, but they have smashed their way to my top 3 ships of all time. How do you compete with a god who’s fallen from grace and his eternally devoted follower who would burn the world down to see them smile? How do you compete with Hua Cheng, who has stayed by Xie Lian’s side for hundreds of years out of pure devotion, but not in a creepy or weird stalkery way? I think the biggest thing this ship has going for it is its sincerity. Hua Cheng doesn’t stay with Xie Lian because he’s hoping Xie Lian will fall for him eventually. He doesn’t believe he’s even worthy of Xie Lian’s love. But he stays anyway, because that’s what unconditional love is like. You stay when the one you love is at their lowest and you can’t do anything to help. You stay when they’re fighting the heavenly emperor and kick ass alongside them. You hold an umbrella over their head when it's raining blood and carry them across the ground when it's littered with corpses.

2. Magnus Bane and Alec Lightwood from The Mortal Instruments/Shadowhunters- These two have destroyed me over the years. I think the best thing about this ship is how they bring out the best in each other and have changed each other’s lives for the better. Magnus is so outgoing and free spirited, but with Alec, he wants to “settle down” (lol) and raise a family. Alec started as the personification of the frowny face emoji, stuck in the closet with a stick up his ass, but now he’s basically running the shadowhunter world. They’re the perfect example of “opposites attract” who have changed their world simply by being in love.

1. Damen and Laurent from Captive Prince- Speaking of couples who change their world simply by being in love…I don’t know if any other ship will top them for me. All the other enemies to lovers ships can get the fuck out. They’re nothing compared to Damen and Laurent. So many times, people will write “enemies to lovers” or “hate to love” relationships that are just two characters snipping at each other or bullying each other for no reason. Get that shit out of here. These two start with the purest, most honest loathing possible. They hurt each other in countless ways, but they come to learn each other slowly. They have every reason to be enemies, but they come through each layer of trauma with love for each other. They’re the kings (pun intended) of this trope.

Honorable mentions: Nick and Charlie from Heartstopper- They’re just so wholesome and sweet. The progression of their relationship from like to love is so realistic, and they’re basically the live action/book version of Sasaki and Miyano.

Ronan and Adam from The Raven Cycle- (haven’t read the last book in the Dreamer trilogy, but I hope nothing bad happens). Their differing brands of chaotic energy compliment each other perfectly, and as a reader, the slow realization that Ronan is in love with Adam was so eye opening and satisfying in a way few other series have been able to capture.

Just for fun, here are some of my “less canon” ships too.

* Inej and Kaz (they're practically canon, but they never explicitly say they're together or in love...but we all know they are)

*Kylo Ren and Rey (also practically canonical since they've at least kissed)

* America and England from Hetalia (if I really want to go back to my fandom shipping roots. I read nothing but fics for them for like 2 years in high school 😅)

*Izaya Orihara and Shizuo Heiwajima 

*Hinata and Kageyama

*Carole and Tuesday

*Link and Sidon

[seidenbros]

We're Falling Like the Stars

Pairing: Wylan van Eck x Jesper Fahey Summary: “One day, I’m gonna take my time with you and spoil you rotten. But I fear that I don’t have the patience today.” “Good. Neither do I.” Wylan let out a chuckle that made Jesper feel all warm and fuzzy in addition to the arousal coursing through his veins already. Being able to be like this, joke a little in a heated situation, was so important to him, and to Wylan as well as it seemed. “Oh, so you want me to hurry up?” “Yes, please” or Wylan and Jesper spent their first night together at Jesper's place and take things further. Word count: 4.735 Warning/Tags: POV Jesper Fahey, porn with feelings, lots of kissing, anal fingering, anal sex, blushing Wylan, teasing,safer sex, consent is very important to them, impatient Wylan, I can read to him A/N: I haven't published smut in well over a year I think, but this time, I had two lovely people from twitter beta read and give me their opinion beforehand, so a special thank you goes out to them. While this is kind of an extra chapter to You're All I Wanna Breathe, it can totally be read as a standalone since all the relevant information should be there 💚 Read on AO3

It was cold on this December night when Jesper and Wylan walked back to Jesper’s flat after the concert. Up until a couple of days ago, it had been a bit difficult between them. After Wylan had lied to him and run away only to turn his phone off and not getting and hence reacting to any of Jesper’s messages, Nina had been the one to help them talk about everything with giving Jesper the key to the bakery. Because he hadn’t wanted to meet Jesper, he’d slept during the day and worked in the middle of the night, since he hadn’t been able to sleep then anyway. That step towards Wylan had been just the right thing, and they’d finally talked. Wylan had confided in Jesper, had told him why he’d run - because he’d been so ashamed of his dyslexia. Something that had been ingrained in him by his father, who’d always talked down on him, had told him how useless he was. Jesper was nothing like his father, and deep down Wylan had known that. That night had proven it to him once again, when Jesper had told him that nothing had changed between them. That he was the person he’d fallen for, no matter what. Luckily, they’d gotten the misunderstandings out of the way, and Jesper now knew why Wylan had lied to him about reading the book. It was nothing that would ever stand between them, because like Jesper had told him, he would read to him whatever he wanted to hear. And so, he’d been able to hand him the book once more so that Wylan had been able to find the concert tickets as well as the question whether he wanted to go with Jesper or not.

During the concert, both of them had needed to be close to each other, holding hands, holding each other with Jesper’s hand on Wylan’s stomach. With Wylan, everything was different, and so Jesper had more than enjoyed being there with him, being this close, the heat of his body seeping into his fingertips that were laying on his stomach. They were both sweating, but he didn’t mind. The curls at the nape of Wylan’s neck were showing even more once they’d gotten a little damp, and he hadn’t been able to resist leaning down to place a kiss right there. Wylan was always a vision, but like this, letting loose, enjoying himself with Jesper, dancing to the music with him, he’d looked even more gorgeous.They’d shared kisses every now and then, had even swayed to the music, and when Jesper had asked Wylan if he wanted to spend the night at his place, his answer had made his heart beat faster. So far, Jesper had been to Wylan’s apartment a few times, and they’d fallen asleep together, enjoying the closeness and being able to sleep through the night without a problem, but nothing more had happened. They’d cuddled, touched each other’s skin, but neither of them had initiated anything. He had no idea what tonight had in store for them, but no matter what happened or didn’t happen, he’d enjoy it, because he got to spend that time with Wylan. And he had to admit, he was a bit nervous to show Wylan around his rather small flat - especially compared to Wylan’s place that was really spacious - and his heart leaped a little in his chest when they walked up the stairs so that he could let them in.

Jesper helped Wylan out of his coat, and put both of their coats away before he took off his shoes once they were inside. Wylan did the same before taking a look around. Jesper had to admit that he was a bit nervous, because it really was small, a bit cluttered, but at least, he’d kept the place tidy - because he’d hoped to show it to Wylan today, or tomorrow, or whenever.

“It’s really nice, Jes, very cosy.” Wylan turned around, smiling up at him, before taking his hand in his own. “I love the colours, they’re very you.”

“I’m glad you think so.” Jesper curled his arm around his middle, holding him like this while still holding his hand. “Ready for bed just yet? Or do you want another drink or something? We could also keep on reading.” After finishing Stardust , they’d chosen the next book, and Jesper really enjoyed reading to him. Though after the first book, he hadn’t brought their names into the stories again.

“Bed sounds good, but I’m not quite ready to sleep just yet.” Wylan rose up a little to be able to kiss his cheek, his jaw, making Jesper sigh in pleasure at the kisses, his heart kicking in his chest at what he was hopefully implying.

“Oh?” He ran his palm down his back along his spine. “Whatever you want, darling.”

“There’s just one thing right now. You.” Wylan grazed his teeth along his neck down to his collarbone that was peeking out a little where his buttons were undone. Oh, he was already driving him a bit wild with that. Jesper’s fingers flexed against Wylan’s back, but he slowly started walking backwards to lead him to the bedroom.

“That’s a good thing, because that’s the only thing on my mind as well. You.” He groaned when Wylan started to suck softly on the delicate skin over his collarbone, not expecting him to be so forward, but he really liked that. His own hand slid down from his back to his behind, giving it a gentle squeeze, and the reaction he received from Wylan, that intake of breath, the fingers that dug into his side, was absolutely perfect.

Jesper led them safely to the bed and turned them around so that he could cup the back of Wylan’s head, and gently lay him down on the bed like this. He pulled back just to look at him for a moment.

“Do you have any idea, just how beautiful you are?” Jesper shook his head smiling, because he managed to take his breath away time and time again. As if on cue, Wylan’s cheeks turned pink at the compliment, and he lifted both his hands to cover his face with them. Jesper seized that moment to grab his wrists and lean down to kiss him. He placed his right knee between Wylan’s thighs, the left one on the outside of his thigh, just kissing him soft and sweet like this for a moment. When Jesper let go of his wrists, Wylan immediately cupped his cheek with his left hand, trailed the other hand over his shoulder, to his chest so that he could start unbuttoning his shirt further.

“Are you sure about this?” Jesper asked, nipping on his bottom lip, before he kissed slowly over his cheek to his jaw. He had to make sure, make Wylan understand that he could always say no , no matter the situation.

“Absolutely,” Wylan said, followed by a moan when Jesper flicked his tongue against the spot right below his ear.

“Good. But we can always stop. Just say the word.” Not that he wanted to stop, not with how good Wylan’s fingers against his skin felt, how he tasted and sounded, but he never wanted to push him in any kind of way or direction.

“I know. But I don’t want to stop.” Wylan unbuttoned the rest of his shirt, let his fingernails rake over his stomach, up to his chest. “I want you, Jes.”

Jesper pushed himself up onto his knees and took off the unbuttoned shirt, eyes fixed on Wylan, who looked almost ethereal against his dark sheets. His hair standing up in all the right places, his chest rising and falling with slightly laboured breathing. Oh, he really wanted to ruin him for every other man, because he was pretty sure that Wylan had already done that with him.

“I want you, too. So much.”

Holding himself up with one arm so he didn’t crush him, Jesper leaned down to kiss his lips just once before he kissed his neck, his throat, wandering further down while he unbuttoned Wylan’s shirt, kissing all of that delicious skin he was laying bare. Wylan’s fingers touched his shoulders, stroked down his back, making Jesper sigh in pleasure at the goosebumps that spread all over his skin like that. He pulled the shirt from where it was tucked into Wylan’s jeans, opening the rest of the buttons, his lips working their way further down.

“One day,” he started, placing an open mouthed kiss right below his navel before lifting his head to look up at him. “I’m gonna take my time with you and spoil you rotten. But I fear that I don’t have the patience today.”

“Good. Neither do I.” Wylan let out a chuckle that made Jesper feel all warm and fuzzy in addition to the arousal coursing through his veins already. Being able to be like this, joke a little in a heated situation, was so important to him, and to Wylan as well as it seemed.

“Oh, so you want me to hurry up?” Jesper teased gently, sliding his knee up a little, pressing against his crotch, earning a whimper from Wylan that made him in turn take a deep breath, while he watched Wylan push himself up a bit so he could take off his shirt and throw it aside. What Jesper didn’t expect was that Wylan pulled him close with a hand against the back of his neck to kiss him. And it wasn’t a soft or a chaste kiss. It was carnal and deep, and the way Wylan licked into his mouth, chasing his tongue, made him moan into that kiss.

“Yes, please,” Wylan mumbled against his lips once he pulled back and lay back down against the mattress. Jesper really enjoyed that kind of boldness, and that little please definitely had its effect on him.

“As you wish.” He would have loved to tease him more, and maybe he would, but right now, he just wanted to get Wylan out of his clothes, have him fully naked spread out against his sheets. And so, he leaned down again, nipped at Wylan’s hip while his fingers opened the button and fly on his jeans. He didn’t waste time to push his hand between his jeans and boxers, pressing his palm against this length, finding him already semi-hard, which was the same state that he was in. The moan that came over Wylan’s lips was music to his ears, and so he kept his hand where it was, mapping him out like that, stroking him as best as he could through the fabric of his boxers. He couldn’t resist and sucked a little mark into the soft skin on his lower abdomen. A place where only the two of them would see it. It was possessive in a way, but that was what Wylan brought out in him. Wylan, whose hips bucked up against his touch, seeking more friction.

“Please… take it off,” Wylan said as he looked down at Jesper, his nails grazing over his shoulder, whatever he could reach.

“Honestly, you make it hard for me to tease you like this.” Jesper breathed through gritted teeth, because he really wanted to tease him a little, rile him up like this, but when he asked, nearly pleaded like this, he really couldn’t drag this out.

“I’d rather make something else hard.” Wylan had to chuckle at his own bad pun, but Jesper showed him how successful he had already been, by pressing his crotch down against his thigh, rubbing up against him a little, because he needed at least a little relief. He couldn’t stop himself from moaning at the feeling - and he didn’t even want to, because he wanted Wylan to know how he made him feel.

“Already did that,” he hummed against Wylan’s skin, pressing another kiss against his abdomen, before he pushed himself up onto his knees again, looking down at Wylan. He pushed his fingers beneath his jeans and boxers at his hips and carefully pulled both down at the same time. He had to step off the bed to really get both off his body, taking the socks right with them. His heart kicked against his chest, when he slowly raked his eyes over his body, starting at his legs, his hips, to his middle, where his length lay hot and heavy against his stomach.Jesper licked his lips when he looked further up, following the constellation of freckles on his stomach to his chest. They looked like fine dust covering him, begging for Jesper to place his hands and lips right there, and he would. For now, he found Wylan’s gaze.

Jesper had always been confident in the way he looked, and right now, he was basking in the way Wylan looked at him. It was the same way, Jesper had just looked at him. He held his breath for a moment as he almost felt Wylan’s eyes wander down along his chest, his stomach, and when it dropped further, Jesper opened his belt, realising that Wylan’s eyes stayed focused right there, just like he’d hoped and kind of expected. He didn’t rush it, but he didn’t take it slow eitherl, when he opened his button and fly as well, shuddering a little in relief, because it was getting a bit tight in there. He allowed himself to breathe again when he pushed his pants along with his boxers down, stepped out of them and pushed his socks off with his feet. He wasn’t sure, but he thought he’d heard another whimper from Wylan. When their eyes met again, Wylan reached out his hands to Jesper, and he followed this invitation immediately.

When he crawled back onto the bed, he held himself up on his knees and his right hand. Wylan pulled him closer again to kiss him, and it was something neither of them could ever get enough of. He had to pull back, though, so he could look what he was doing as he reached out his left hand to open the drawer in the bedside table. Wylan seized that moment to attach his lips to Jesper’s throat, distracting him with that a little, because it felt so good. Slowly, Wylan kissed his way down his throat to his chest, his fingers stroking gently over his sides, landing on his hips to give them a gentle squeeze. Oh, he must have known how crazy he was driving Jesper with this. His fingertips brushed the little bottle, but he couldn’t grab it, because he was too uncoordinated - thanks to Wylan who flicked his tongue against his left nipple, making him moan in the process.

“You steal all my concentration with that,” he admitted a bit breathlessly, making Wylan pull back just slightly, but it gave him enough time to get the bottle and two of the square packages out of the drawer.

“I would say I’m sorry, but… No, I’m not. You started the teasing after all.” Jesper could feel Wylan’s smile against his skin before he sucked his nipple between his lips, making Jesper drop what he had just grabbed next to the pillow.

“Yeah.” It wasn’t very eloquent, but the only thing that came over his lips right now. His fingers raked through Wylan’s hair, just enjoying the moment, the way Wylan kissed and touched his body, driving him even more out of his mind than he already was. He’d slept with his fair share of people, but this was still different, and he knew why. Because he felt so much for Wylan that he didn’t want to say out loud right now, but it showed in the way they treated each other.

Carefully he grabbed Wylan’s hair, not wanting to hurt him, but he had to pull him back a little. He looked in his eyes for a moment, before he leaned down to kiss him again. A soft nip to Wylan’s bottom lip followed, before he kissed him properly once more. The way Wylan’s nails raked over his back, made Jesper’s hips twitch forward, and he knew that he had to hurry with certain things right now. Still he kept on kissing Wylan as he made quick work of the first condom to roll it down his own length before he took the other wrapper. Now, he pulled back from Wylan, because he wanted to look at him. Tearing the wrapper and pulling the condom out of it, he kept looking at Wylan, who licked his lips. All these little things he did were driving Jesper mad with want and need. So yes, maybe, his hands were a bit shaky, when he used them to carefully roll the condom down Wylan’s length, watching his every reaction, the way his lips parted in a soft moan. Wylan, who was getting impatient as well as it seemed, pushed his hips up and into Jesper’s grip, who immediately followed and started stroking him.

“You should see yourself,” Jesper mumbled, letting his eyes trail over him, stopping right where he was touching him, at the little movements of Wylan’s hips that made his blood run hot once again, already imagining other things with him.

“I’d rather look at you,” Wylan muttered, followed by a moan, his hands reaching out to stroke over his chest and down over his abdomen until he could curl his fingers around Jesper’s cock and mimic his touch. Jesper groaned deeply, before he dove down to kiss Wylan. He needed that kiss to ground himself at least a little bit, because this kind of touch was almost too much for him. Having his fair share of experience with other people, hadn’t prepared him for being with Wylan, though. Because of the way he felt for him, the spot that Wylan already had in his heart, everything felt heightened.

“Stop,” Jesper breathed after a moment when their lips parted, still hovering close to him like this. Wylan pulled back his hands, looking up at Jesper with wide eyes.

“Sorry, did I-”

“No! No, that’s not it.” Jesper stole a quick kiss from his lips, his own hand slowly stroking along his side and his hip. “Quite the opposite. It’s too good, and I don’t want it to be over that quick.”

“Oh.” Wylan blushed at his words before he started to smile again. He kissed Jesper once more, rubbing his thumbs over his nipples, because that was something he could do right now.

Jesper gently pulled on his bottom lip with his teeth, releasing it with a grin before he kissed over Wylan’s jaw, down his neck, nipping at the delicate skin. All the little sounds he received were music to his ears, and so he kept going. When he reached for the little bottle, Wylan’s legs fell open even further, anticipating what was going to happen and it showed once more, how much both of them wanted this.

Jesper revelled in this display of trust, moaning quietly at the way Wylan touched him, nails scratching a bit over his chest, but Jesper liked it that way. He pressed open-mouthed kisses all the way down to his stomach again, over the crease to his thigh, while he opened the bottle of lube to pour a bit of it onto his fingers. He wanted to ask Wylan if he was alright, or if he wanted to stop, but the way he reacted, reached out his hand to stroke over Jesper’s hair, and pushed his hips a little forward, showed him how much he wanted this. That alone made Jesper groan against Wylan’s skin, pressing his lips against his thigh to muffle the sounds.

“Don’t! Let me hear you,” Wylan said, looking down at him, and Jesper felt his heart kick against his chest. This wasn’t just intimate in a physical way, but on an emotional level as well.

“As you wish, darling.” He understood that, because he definitely enjoyed hearing Wylan as well, every little sound he made, and he wanted to hear so much more of that.

Jesper was careful when he pushed his fingers between them, stroked the lubed up ones over his perineum, further down to tease him a little like that, circling around his hidden place, adding a bit of pressure. The way Wylan’s fingers gripped his hair made him moan in unison with him.

“Jes… please,” Wylan nearly begged him, and Jesper gave in, didn’t want to tease him any longer, so he slowly pushed one finger inside. Wylan tensed for the shortest moment, but quickly relaxed again.

“Okay?” Jesper hummed the question against his skin as he placed kisses onto his stomach again. Wylan answered him with a nod, with his fingers that stroked ever so gently over Jesper’s cheek before they touched his shoulder again. Jesper started moving his finger inside him, taking his time, while his own arousal was urging him to hurry up, needing some relief, but he wanted to make this so good for Wylan - and himself in turn as well.

Just as he pulled his finger back to replace it with two, he pressed his tongue against the underside of Wylan’s cock, tearing a deep groan from him that made Jesper shiver in turn. He knew he was just teasing Wylan with this, but it was probably enough already. Pressing his own hips down against the mattress, he created some friction for himself, just so he didn’t do anything rash, because he still wanted and needed to prepare Wylan a little more.

“Jes,” Wylan moaned when Jesper entered him with three fingers, preparing him properly, because he didn’t want to hurt him in any kind of way. Not now, not ever. Wylan placed his hand against his nape and directed him up again so he could kiss him. Tongues entangled, Jesper rutted against the mattress, before they had to break apart.

“Please… I need to feel you.” Wylan nipped on his bottom lip, let the instep of his left foot stroke up along the back of Jesper’s thigh, before he wrapped his leg around him to pull him closer.

“Yes… Saints, you’re driving me crazy, you know that?” Jesper said with a breathless laugh, kissing his cheek, before he pushed himself up a little again.

“You do the same to me.” Wylan’s palms stroked over his upper arms, his shoulders, whatever he could reach right now, while Jesper reached for the bottle again to pour some lube on his own length, stroking himself to coat himself properly. Grabbing himself by the base, he positioned himself, and, eyes trained on Wylan’s face, he slowly breached him, pushed carefully deeper, taking his time, and in turn giving Wylan time to adjust to him. Once he was buried deep inside him, he leaned down to kiss him. Both legs now wrapped around Jesper’s waist, Wylan kissed him with such fervour that it knocked the air out of his lungs.  Even more so when Wylan pushed more against him, trying to move his hips to get Jesper to move.

“Impatient, are we?” Jesper murmured against Wylan’s lips, the smile evident in his tone.

“Just because you’re a tease,” Wylan retorted, framing his face with both hands to kiss him soundly once more.

“Can’t help it with you.” Because Wylan’s reactions were everything to him. But they both needed that now, their lust already built up so high, that it wouldn’t take either of them long tonight.

Jesper slowly pulled his hips back, before he pushed back in, taking his time, finding a slow, languid rhythm at first. They shared kisses, his right hand found Wylan’s hip to hold onto him, needing this to ground himself in a way.

“Oh… fuck! Jesper.” Wylan groaned when Jesper picked up his pace, started thrusting into him. He was so surprised to hear that kind of word from soft-spoken, sweet Wylan. And turned on. It was such a contrast to his usual self that Jesper groaned lewdly.

He already felt himself get closer and closer, everything so perfect with Wylan, who tightened his legs around him for a moment, drawing another moan from his lips like this. Jesper grabbed his hip a little tighter, before letting go of it, his fingers stroking over his hipbone, his stomach, until he could wrap his fingers around Wylan’s cock and stroke him in time with his thrusts. The sound Wylan made at the first touch made Jesper’s head spin. He couldn’t really describe it, but it definitely had its effect on him.

Wylan pulled him in for a kiss, that wasn’t refined at all. It was sloppy, but that was what both of them needed right now apparently, getting closer and closer to the edge. But Jesper had one goal in mind, he wanted Wylan to come first, wanted to watch him like this.

“Jes,” Wylan managed to say breathlessly, his fingers trailing down Jesper’s arm, nails digging slightly into his forearm. “Close!”

“Me too.” Jesper kept his thrusts up like that, angling his hip a little differently, twisting his wrists while he stroked him, rubbing his thumb over that sensitive spot, which always drove him wild and apparently, it did the same to Wylan. “Go on, darling… come for me.”

It didn’t take more than that for Wylan to let go, moaning Jesper’s name. His fingers scratched slightly along Jesper’s arm, but he didn’t even feel it, so caught in the vision that was one Wylan van Eck below him in the throes of passion.

It took Jesper only three, four more thrusts, to topple over the edge as well, groaning deep within his chest at the intense feeling. He was careful not to crush Wylan beneath him when he sank down, still holding him up on his forearm - the one Wylan hadn’t scratched. His head was still spinning as he tried to regulate his breathing. Carefully, he pulled out, peppering kisses over Wylan’s shoulder, who was stroking his fingertips along Jesper’s back, his legs around him gone slack, but they were still there, holding him close.

After a moment they’d both needed to come down, Jesper raised his head to look at Wylan. If he’d thought him beautiful earlier, he didn’t have any words to describe him right now. Hair a complete mess, but he really liked that look on him, cheeks and chest flushed, making his freckles stand out even more, lips a little swollen from all the kisses they’d shared. A true vision.

He moved his arm on which he’d put his weight so that he could stroke his fingertips over Wylan’s cheek and through his hair, leaning down to kiss his lips, before he pushed himself up, wrapped the other arm around Wylan’s waist to pull him with him as he lay down on his side. He kept the arm wrapped around him, using the other hand to stroke all over his back, holding him close to his body, basking in their afterglow for a while.

“How are you feeling?” Jesper asked quietly, tracing his fingers up along his spine until he reached the back of his head, where he gently rubbed the pads of his fingers over his scalp. Wylan gave the faintest moan because it felt so good.

“Wonderful… great… amazing…” Wylan cupped his cheek, rubbing his thumb over it as his smile widened even more. “You?”

“I think that sums it up rather well.'' He kissed the corner of Wylan’s mouth, his cheek, and then he hugged him close for a moment. “What do you say… to a quick shower? And then we can cuddle up in bed again, read a chapter and go to sleep?” They didn’t have to, but Jesper had really enjoyed reading to Wylan in the evenings, and when they hadn’t been together, he’d read a chapter to him on the phone. By now, it was kind of a tradition for them.

“That sounds like the perfect plan.” Wylan cupped his cheek and kissed him once more. “Five more minutes, then we can get up.”

When Wylan buried his face in the crook of Jesper’s neck, he knew that he would give him whatever he wanted. He couldn’t stop himself from smiling, his eyes closed, because he had no idea when anyone had ever made him as happy as Wylan did.

[intosnarkness]

i need enablement so you all get a fic preview.

from the follow this through, the companion piece to adding on weight to the darkness in me that gives you Jesper's adventure in chapters 3-4 (and also gives context to a very specific exchange in ch 11 that I have been thinking about for 3 months)

Jesper knows he could win this fight if he played dirty. If he kissed Wylan or used any of their relationship as a bargaining chip, Wylan would give in. He'd let Jesper go and do this absolutely insane thing to free one man. He doesn't, though, because he's not sure Wylan would ever forgive him.

"Okay," Jesper says, leaning down to press their foreheads together. "But it's the best chance we have, and I'm going to take it. I'm sorry it's not a good choice, but it's the one I'm going to make."

"Please be careful," Wylan breathes, pulling his hands from Jesper's grip to reach up and cup his cheek gently. "Please, treasure?"

Jesper might have a commitment to playing fair, but Wylan apparently is absolutely okay with cheating. Treasure. Like he doesn't know what the nickname does to Jesper.

"I will," Jesper says, closing his eyes and leaning into the soft caress. "I won't let anything keep me from you."

Wylan leans in, brushing his lips over Jesper's. It's the barest ghost of a kiss, the idea of a loving touch. 

"Promise me," Wylan breathes, and Jesper raises his own hand to rest on top of Wylan's, squeezing gently.

"I'll meet you at dawn," Jesper says. "Watch the stars, count the minutes. And when the sun starts to rise, I'll be there."

Wylan's breath catches in his throat. It's been almost a year since they got together, since they went on the mission for Inej that ended with Wylan shot and Jesper frantic for his wellbeing. Since Wylan had told him that they should kiss.

Jesper had leaned in, kissing Wylan for all he was worth - which was a lot, all things considered. And when they'd finally broken apart, Wylan's cheeks flushed and Jesper panting for breath, the sun was peeking over the crooked horizon of shambling buildings.

It had felt a little silly, cliche even. But Jesper had always loved watching the sunrise. He loved the feeling of staying up all night with someone, just talking. He loved the tired kind of intimacy that came from hours of being too wrapped up in another person to even think about sleep or sex or leaving. Just holding hands and being with them. And he'd laughed when he saw that sunrise, giddy from the kiss and the adrenaline and the colors and the surprise that someone as beautiful and sweet and smart as Wylan would want him. Would think that kissing Jesper would be a good idea.

"Meet me every dawn," Jesper had whispered against Wylan's lips. "Every sunrise. Kiss me like that, and I'll be yours for as long as you'll have me."

It was surprisingly poetic, Jesper thought, and probably if either of them was better read, they'd have had more of a baseline to compare it to the great love declarations of history and literature. But they weren't. So it was enough for both of them.

"Dawn," Wylan had agreed, and then they hadn't needed to talk any more.

[fen-the-magnificat]

more thoughts on a soc &j au (beware spoilers for both!!)

ok so.

juliet and romeo as nina and matthias. i really feel as though nina is simply a more mature juliet; they share a very similar charm and wit. plus nina being a heartrender i feel like gives 'oops i did it again' vibes even though that is not what a heart render does lmao. i just feel there is a symbolism to be found between juliet as a lover and hearts + exerting control over them (this takes me back to year 9 writing r&j essays, were they in control of their romance or was it fate, that kind of idea).

matthias and romeo are not very similar characters in terms of personality - what with romeo being kinda airheaded and Matthias being a more stoic character. BUT. matthias is raised druskelle, who hunt and kill grisha (what nina is), which is about as close as you can get to a capulet-montague metaphor, i reckon. plus, (SPOILERS) his death at the end of crooked kingdom, IN NINAS ARMS MIGHT I MENTION, is very r&j, and very the start of &j, as nina does not also kill herself. both pairs follow a classic forbidden lovers arc, while not created, was popularised to some extent by r&j, so i feel like the doomed romance creates some glaring parallels.

NOW.

frankie as wylan. wylan, in both show and books, is mousy, a talented musician, lacking in confidence. remind you of anyone? he's also neurodivergent-coded, and so is frankie. they both share an overbearing father and an absent mother figure (please note: this is not me equating lance to van eck. lance misunderstands his son, van eck is straight up abusive.) wylan has a beautiful arc of sort of discovering part of himself, and a certain level of self-confidence, through his love for jesper and the support he receives in return, that i think lines up in a really neat way with frankie's overall arc in the show of finding himself, and finding confidence, due in part to finding may.

speaking of! may as jesper. physical characteristics aside, jesper is the fashionable smooth-talker of the crows, in a way that reminds me of the may we see before 'domino' and again before 'i kissed a girl'. jesper also faces similar challenges to may, but where may struggles with their gender identity, (SPOILERS) jesper represses his own grisha powers. and before you say "fen! that's not the same thing at all, you doof!" both aspects of the characters are painted as integral to each of them respectively. may has (presumably, as it's not outright stated, only inferred) dealt with years of misgendering and confusion, and hides that part of themself up until 'i'm not a girl', and jesper actively works to hide the powers that, as part of his culture (zemini), "should be celebrated" because of a bad experience in the past (not gonna spoil that one). also, jesper wears a skirt for like. several episodes of shadow and bone, and to me personally, it's giving genderfluid vibes, but that's neither here nor there.

overall, please watch this scene, look me in the eyes, and tell me it's not maycois.

PS. not sure who i would put as kaz and inej? maybe anne and william? however it works more in the sense of their strained relationship in &j than it does in terms of the actual characters. hmm.

[ephemeralgalaxies]

Shadow and Bone s2 spoilers

also some Six of Crows spoilers, so if you've watched s2 but still don't wanna know anything more yet about the crows than what the show has already given us, beware cause this will involve (probable) future spoilers

(once again, Wylan edition (and a lil jesper. but mostly wylan). but this time it's about the soundtrack that plays during a certain scene in episode 4 iykyk) (most of my meta posts will probably be about him. he's a cool character. and he's me but that's beside the point) (me as in ND with tics, sass, and way to much random fact info than is for his own good but sometimes actually proves very useful but not in the way you'd expect. usually in a quite disturbing and confuzzling way)

last warning for spoilers under the cut bc I am absolutely picking apart as many frames as I can

OK OK YES THIS IS ABOUT THE KISS SCENE BUT SPECIFICALLY THE MUSIC THAT PLAYS BEFORE/DURING. Bear with me here, this is gonna be quite the trainwreck as I am running on adrenaline from sleep deprivation and also like two oreos.

To start off, the song for this scene is The Night We Met composed by Joseph Trapanese (spotify link).

Alright, first, the way this song just blends so nicely from the scene with Pekka Rollins in the cemetery to this one just *chef's kiss* (ofc we get quite the gap in soundtrack between the end of that scene and once this song starts playing, but they still arch together pretty well) In fact, I almost thought they were the same, or at least same motif (it tries to be a major key song with lots of accidentals/minor-falls/glissandos to make it more angsty dramatic). Which, shouldn't mean that much from a distance... but oh boi does it make my mind stir.

That song (labeled by Netflix CC as "dramatic music" lmao) surfaces when Pekka Rollins and his crew are scouring the Black Veil Cemetery in search of his son, Alby Rollins. Ofc, he finds him safe and well just as the police(?) take Rollins under arrest for the murders he's just admitted to (holy shit, Kaz works fast). Like, with the beginning of The Night We Met, these are the same songs in different fonts. Which,,, may not be on purpose but is absolutely brilliant anyways bc of how much Alby and his father mirror Wylan and his father (if that mirror had shattered into a web design and had been left to collect dust and mold for decades).

(summary context just in case we do have some ppl reading this that don't know about Wylan's family and want to: his father is Jan Van Eck, a very wealthy merchant from Ketterdam. Like, Pekka Rollins "rules" the Barrel, but Van Eck (and capitalist co) run the country. But he's a shit person and an even more shit father, disowning Wylan on the basis of him not being able to read and therefore "useless as an heir" so,,, Wylan ran away ofc)

So right before this very emotional scene for Wylan, we get Pekka Rollins, absolute dumpster fire trash of a man, be a good father. aND EVEN HAVING THE MUSIC DO A HARSH FADE FROM WHEN ROLLINS NON LONGER CAN SEE HIS SON TO WYLAN ASKING JESPER WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE FREE?

im screaming so much it was perfect

So with that in context, we lead into the scene in Wylan's workshop. It's quiet now, hopeful even. You're already forgetting about abandoned sons and desperate fathers. The world is "full of possibilities." There's no music anymore, just the fizzling and clanging (Wylan, wtf do u have clanging in your workshop???). And the silence stays as Jesper talks about what he'd like to do now that he can roam the Barrel free again. How he'd like to do that... with Wylan.

But Wylan's acting weird. He should be in his element here; laid out, an open book. But he's hiding. No literally, he ducks under the table. And even after he's explained that he's feeling strange bc he was so sure Jesper wouldn't want anything more with him, there's silence. It's only when Jesper starts to back away, when he seems hurt by the idea that Wylan doesn't think Jesper would like him, that the music picks up. And I love this so much because throughout this entire scene, Wylan is interacting with the music. As if he can hear it. Jesper floats along it, fitting everything so perfect within pauses, but Wylan actually feels it. Like each little violin arco pull or harp chord is another thought in his head.

So here: the music starts. Just gentle harp for now (I think that's a harp. Or something of the variety. I'm gonna be so embarrased if it's just like an acoustic guitar or smth). And Jesper backs up, hurt, and Wylan realizes oh shit wait this actually means something to him, I've just hurt him, I have to fix this. I need to clarify. Let him know it's not like I wanted to leave, but "better to cut my losses." (and my god I love Jack Wolfe's little "I... huuuuuh" that he gives like I love it so much it's so awkward and accurate like Wylan has so much he wants to say but can't figure out how to actually get it out right).

And we keep with this pattern, just gentle (almost melancholic) harp chords of one two three four pause... one two three four pause... BUT IT'S A SORT OF ARPEGIO. BC once Jesper says "my reputation isn't entirely unfounded," the camera pans back to Wylan for the next set of notes that reach a little higher, a little different, little more noticeable. And with this frame, we get a nod and a small smile (not reaching his eyes, ofc, Wylan seems to smile as a signal a lot more than in genuine) -- this feels like confirmation to him. He's correct, his assumptions from that night are valid. Someone like Jesper wouldn't want anything more (from someone like him).

Then we stay on Jesper again, how he likes "the gamble of Barrel life" (sobbing for Wylan thinking that Jesper won't like him anymore when he finds out that Wylan isn't "Barrel life" (not really, he thinks. Not like the rest of them). We even get the more overt and dramatic lil "yeah there you go, ofc, I get that" hand motion with another nod and smile before he avoids Jesper's gaze (and the camera) again by walking off to the end of the table. He's put more distance despite being more accessible now; they're not looking across from each other anymore. Jesper has to move to keep engaging.

And he doesn't at first. He lets his eyes follow Wylan, but then drops them again shortly as he thinks on it all. He's losing Wylan here, he knows it. He needs to change this pattern up before Wylan disappears into that quite chord progression entirely. "I may very well have left you first..." Wylan looks up again, smiles and nods, still tinkering away. He's trying to engage the conversation but only as little as possible. He wants this over with, he's got his confirmation. It's all up to Jesper now.

AND OH BOI DOES JESPER TAKE THAT CHANCE.

He starts walking towards him. "But that..."

Wylan stills, looks back at him, shakes his head and looks back down. Like for a moment it was maybe maybe maybe then pushing that hope back down bc that can't be what this is.

"...was before I got to know you." THE "what wtf hold on" ON WYLAN'S FACE IM SCREAMING. THE HARP IS STILL ALONE, HE'S STILL NOT TRUSTING IT. HE'S LISTENING BUT WON'T DARE ENGAGE YET. HE NEEDS MORE.

"I can't make you any promises." VIOLIN!!!!

"Or predict what might happen between us" VIOLINNNN!!!

"But I can tell you that..." quieter violin as Jesper hesitates

Wylan realizing oh shit oh shit oh shit right along with that muddled lower violin arco note mixed with the harp chord. It's not clean like the others. The harp is catching up to the violin.

"I'd like to find out." Another weird chord (forgive me im tired and can't tell if it's an accidental or just a deviation entirely into another key but it sounds like a different key for a sec) with the harp and a beat of silence. Then the violin follows it...

AND WYLAN SMIRKS. LIKE I SWEAR TO GOD THIS WHOLE POST STARTED BC WHEN I FIRST WATCHED THIS SCENE ALL I COULD THINK OF WAS HOW IT LOOKED LIKE WYLAN REACTS TO THAT VIOLIN NOTE AFTER JESPER SAYS HE WANTS TO TRY SOMETHING MORE WITH HIM. He hides his face from Jesper, and it hits him with the arco note. The guy he likes actually likes him back. This incredible, cool, gunslinger that has his back and doesn't care or judge him for his quirks also actually likes him. more than friendship, more than sex, there's another shared thing here. Wylan can be more. But the harp here slows down, a ritardando only it actually feels the effects of bc the violin has already done its job. Jesper is worried now, he's said what he said and all he can do is hand control over to Wylan.

and then ofc my favorite "hey bro pls respond" like after that arco note that seems to be just for Wylan, like it's his own lil secret realization music, Jesper sits in silence (literally, there's only ambient background, no more actual notes) and when Wylan realizes he hasn't actually responded, that Jesper also needs confirmation, dear god he's gonna give it to him.

But the music doesn't start up again once Wylan begins to walk (run. Like he's sprinting into this kiss) to Jesper, it starts again when Jesper realizes what Wylan's doing. That he's responding. And he's responding very positively.

Now the violin is confident, steady, forceful. There's no more of that careful sliding on the bow, this is borderline staccato. And it's joining the harp. THEY'RE PLAYING TOGETHER NOW!!! THEY'VE CAUGHT UP!!!!!!! Like they've literally caught up, the two characters and instruments melting together in a new melody of the same key but with energy and passion and giddy joy. IT'S LIKE FIREWORKS, LIKE A GUNSHOT.

Then the roaring ocean, violin switching from a long-short combo to straight 16th notes fast and ready and dear god I love it. There's still that whisper of the more hesitant violin in the background, but the faster one is taking control of the piece now. It knows what it wants, has a clear direction. And saints, if that doesn't perfectly mirror Wylan in this scene. This music piece is a beautiful conversation not just between the two characters (and respective separate instruments) but also with that haunting past Wylan carries with his confidence. He knows his worth, knows he's useful. He just can't think that others would recognize this as well. A violin is not a gentle instrument (I'm sorry, but there's a reason I chose the cello). It's higher pitches are harsher, sharper. It can be beautiful, yes, but it can never have that subtlety of a cello or viola (at least lower strings of a viola). The violin is the 1st chair, the main melody carrier, the gem of the orchestra. Sure you need the others, but everyone knows the violin. Wylan knows his worth to a sharp, unsubtle point. But he hangs back like a 2nd violin position -- letting someone else take the reigns until he finally has the space (the safety) of exploding (hehe) into sound. He trusts Jesper now. Wylan's gonna play with the force of his bombs now.

At least until Jesper learns about his history. Which, I think might be another reason why we still have that 2nd violin position sound even at the end. He's encouraged, but he knows there's something he's still gotta hide. And it won't be pretty when it all spills out.

TLDR: the music nerd obsesses over the fictional music nerd way more than anyone asked for (which is at all. no one asked for this. why do I keep doing music-based metas. because I love them and can't sleep until I do them that's why). Wylan is a violin apparently but he can't decide whether he's playing along with the cellos/violas or if he's taking the reigns and filling that conductor's right-hand man spot (is it the right side? hold on. wait shit no it's the conductor's left side. whatever. that 1st chair violin thing that's really special but idc bc Im a cellist and my director switches our section arrangements all the time to play with sound). Also apparently Jesper is a harp which does kinda make sense considering it's a pizzicato sound and Jesper is very ticky ticky like most of the soundtrack songs he's in the scenes of have some kind of ticking. so,,,,,,,

[jazzythursday]

Cloud Warmth sunshine

I only really have snippets to share from my post s2 wip so here are those! (incidentally, they all ended up being kisses)

Cloud

In the morning Jesper smiles at him like he’s funnelling the full Jesper Fahey namesake into it, and asks, “Has anyone ever told you how pretty you are?”

Wylan shuts his eyes against the early morning light, opens them slower, attempting wryness, “Maybe once or twice.”

Jesper gasps, delight unmistakable even as it hides behind dramatics. He likes Wylan like this, likes when all the softness brings out his sharper edges.

“Only once or twice?”

Wylan shakes his head against the crook of Jesper’s neck. He wants to burrow. Do crows burrow? Maybe he’ll build a nest.

“That is indecent,” Jesper says, mock outrage colouring his tone. “We need to rectify this overcite immediately!” He leans over and peppers Wylan’s upper half with light kisses. “Pretty”—kiss—“beautiful”—kiss—“darling”—kiss—“boy.” Wylan catches his lips and tries to hold them for longer, deepening it. Jesper pulls back and smiles, one of his softer ones this time.

“Maybe you should tell me again, just to be sure.”

Jesper takes his face in his hands, kisses his forehead, between his eyes, his nose. “The prettiest.”

“Not you?” Wylan asks. He feels drunk.

“I consider myself more of the dazzlingly handsome, rogue-ish charmer type, personally.”

Wylan leans in again and Jesper meets him the rest of the way, hands searching, seeking, finding purchase.

Warmth

“You can tell her yourself, she wants to meet you.”

“Oh,” Wylan looks down and presses a few keys at random, suddenly nervous for entirely different reasons.

“Yes oh, and don't make that face.”

“I thought you liked my face.”

Jesper kisses him, slow and sweet. It’s an odd angle, sitting on the narrow bench with Wylan’s elbow digging into the glossed hardwood of the piano. Jesper swings his leg over one side to accommodate it and pulls Wylan forward. Wylan goes easily and with no resistance. He leans further into him. Tries to swallow all the sounds that he knows would echo off of the walls and high arched ceiling if he let them out. Jesper nips at the underside of his jaw and—oh. Yes, the Blue Paradise really does have excellent acoustics.

Eventually, with mutual effort, they pull apart. Wylan can feel the flush on his cheeks going all the way down.

“I love your face,” Jesper says, then seems to process the full implications of his words. His eyes widen and his expression falters. “Uh… I mean—”

Sunshine

“I just—I don’t mind,” Jesper continues, when Wylan keeps staring. “And I was thinking about how I like reading, but I can’t really sit still long enough to really do it, so I haven’t in a while. Books make me antsy, see, but maybe with you there I wouldn’t feel like that.”

Wylan gapes. It feels like Jesper giving him the key all over again. There’s pressure building behind his eyes, terrified but happy, too. Sharp, running him clean through.

“I mean—shit just forget I said that. Unless you want to. I thought it could be nice but out loud it probably sounded really stupid so—

Wylan kisses him. Jesper makes a surprised sound as his hands come up to weave across the back of Wylan’s neck.

Wylan thinks he’s developing a habit of kissing Jesper to shut him up. Neither of them seem to mind, and it’s yielded only positive results so far, so he doesn’t see any reason to try to curb it. Jesper chases his mouth as he pulls away like he can’t help it, like Wylan is a magnet to his metal. Like he’s trying to breathe the air straight out of him.

He smiles against Jesper’s mouth. “I would love that.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes. Definitely.”

“Okay, okay yeah.”

“Okay.”

[lilisouless]

Jesper just entering in a room with Kaz and Wylan: hey Kaz, hi merchling "kisses Wylan´s nape and sits next to him"

Kaz: "snorts" If you are going to coerce your boyfriend into having sex with you , at least wait until i am out of the room. Or don't be so obvious about it at least

Jesper: what? it was a little kiss and i didn't even used my tounge. We have made way worse things in front of you

Kaz: I was talking to Wylan

Wylan: but i didn't do anything!

Kaz: Right now you didn't, but what about hours ago? When you choose to stay in this room, knowing Jesper would come here. You also had a recent haircut, leaving conveniently a spot for Jesper to come and kiss it. Which explains why you didn't lift your head to say "hello" as a normal person would do with their partners when they hear them coming, and you know you are perfectly familiar with Jesper´s steps so there is no way you didn't hear him.

Wylan: Kaz, first: this is inapropiate, second: you are reading too much into that

Kaz: But i am not done, you are using the pants you know Jesper hates,so he wouldn't take any consideration in no damaging them-

Wylan: That means nothing, Jesper hates all my wardrobe

Kaz: Paired with your baby blue shirt, a color you not only know Jesper loves on you, but it´s the only spot of blue in this whole room so it´s impossible he wouldn't notice you.

Jesper: Don't listen to him, i would have noticed you anyway

Kaz: See? it already started. Althought i can't tell if you planned that or it was just luck...

Wylan: nothing of this was planned!

Kaz: you would have fooled me, but there is one thing that gave you away: You are using Jesper´s shampoo, you normally use an orange scented one but , oranges reminds Jesper of his home, aka: his father. And you can't allow Jesper to assosiate you with his father tonight, that wouldn't do it. Oh, also you haven't drink anything but water because you don't want Jesper to think you are even a little bit drunk, he needs to see you are on your five senses and completely able to consent.

Wylan: Kaz-

Kaz: A good plan overall , but you were sloppy on one tiny detail: me, you didn't counted on me being here and being able to figure your plans out so easily.

Wylan standing up: Enought Kaz! this is NOT apropiate and you know it! Just because Inej is out at sea , doesn't mean you can come here and do whatever you want or say whatever you please. We are not your guinea pigs for you to come and show off your "brilliant skills" only in order to feed you already huge ego , so you either learn to behave or you don't put a foot on this house ever again!

Kaz: ...

Jesper: ...

Kaz: ghezen...

Jesper: Wy...

Kaz: "slow claps"

Wylan: now what?

Kaz: Wylan, i am so proud of you.

Wylan: that would normally make me happy, but now i am scared-

Kaz: I was completelly wrong

Wylan: well finally-

Kaz: I made a mistake, you fooled me; i was not a flaw in your plan, i was part of it. You did expected all this to happen

Wylan: Why would i ever do that?

Kaz: You know why, all the previous effort would have been enought. But you are like me Wylan, you allways need more. So, you needed me in the equation, so Jesper will know all the effort you put into this, all the things you notice about him and that you talk with me about him a lot. And the cherry on top: you get to stand up to me. It seems like the real mastermind was you all along, i should stop underestimating you.

Jesper: Oh for saints sake,Kaz ! Just because you are an emotionally constipated weirdo, doesn't mean Wylan is one too. He knows that the only thing he needs to have sex with me is asking!

Kaz: Please, if he was that functional, he would have done all of that. Also, don't pretend you are not enjoying this, Wylan´s plan is working perfectly.

Jesper: You know what, we are leaving.

Wylan: you get going, i have one more thing to set with Kaz

Jesper: Alright, be quick

Wylan after Jesper has left the room: "hands twenty kruge to Kaz"

Kaz: Is this to bribe me into leaving or to thank me?

Wylan: Shut up and take the money

[wordsinheavyblue]

If the Crows were to crash a Desi wedding

A thread

Thank you so much, @theburntromantic, for reading this first and suggesting me ideas! Ily

Jesper

It was obviously his and Nina's plan, your honour

‌grabs everything in his plate only to leave the food in between to go dance

‌Star of the dance floor

‌"Jihne Mera Dil luteya" to Wylan's "Oho"

‌first one to get drunk

‌Makes bets with old uncles who are also tipsy like him

‌loses all of his money and makes Kaz win it back; one glare and all of them return Jesper's money

‌flirts with the groom's horse when he thinks no one is watching

‌introduces Wylan as his sugar daddy to every stranger who's got questions

Wylan

is hesitant at first but once he joins Jesper on the dance floor, all is forgotten

He and Nina scare away all the homophobic aunties and uncles who have nothing better to do than to gossip

‌"You want something to gossip? I'll give you something to gossip!" *kisses Jesper on the mouth as Nina hoots*

‌first one to sing during the bride's vidai and complains about the lack of piano

‌is the fan favourite of the kids ever since he burst crackers with them during the groom's entry

‌pays and gifts for the couple's honeymoon tickets as Jesper gasps. "Is this not enough? Should I have bought something else?" "Why don't you pay for their wedding as well, merchling?" "Oh, okay." "NOOOOOO."

Nina

complains about the absence of waffles

‌"What kind of wedding doesn't have waffles?"

‌is thrilled with the amount of sweets present and keeps sending Matthias to refill her plate

‌is the best dressed and the bride is envious of her

‌she was caught flirting with the bride

‌randomly goes to anyone and everyone and pretends that they have been lifelong best friends

‌Accidentally lied being the best friend of an old guy's wife only to found out he never married. That was awkward...

‌somehow brings every conversation towards Kaz's hair and makes the other person insult it

‌makes sure Inej has eaten properly

‌vows with Inej to only get married to her as Matthias watches with a sigh

‌sobs on Inej's shoulder during the vidai

‌"Nina, you don't even know her."

‌"But it's still so heartbreaking" *sobs* "I'm never leaving you Inej."

‌instigates young girls to "fuck the patriarchy" and asks them "why can't the groom live with the bride? Why does she have to leave her house?"

Matthias

Nina's chaperone

‌when not busy bringing food for Nina, he can be found quarreling about politics with an older guy

‌picks flowers from the decorations and hands them to Nina, who asks him to put them in her hair

‌abstains from drinking and will be the one driving them back

‌"Weak." Complains about the groom arriving on a horse instead of having a wolf by his side.

‌"Don't blame me if this marriage fails because he didn't have a wolf." Inej has to explain it to him that it's a tradition.

‌whines about going back home since he has to wake up early but is ignored

‌is enrolled by the bride's family to carry around tonnes of things for obvious reasons

‌CK AND ROW SPOILERS- "Jihne meinu maar suteya" to Joran's "Oho" T_T

Kaz

didn't even want to come but Inej made him

‌has no recollection of what happened at the wedding and his eyes are glued to Inej

‌a four-years-old child ran into him by mistake and he lectured the child's parents on good parenting

‌has the groom's shoes already hidden while the bride's family finds it in confusion

‌Inej makes him return the shoes and doesn't even let him get any money for it

‌would've gotten thrown out of the wedding if it weren't for Inej

‌the only person to be wearing black on an Indian wedding

‌when an auntie jokes if he's here to attend a funeral, he deadpans, "yes, yours."

‌secretly steals flowers to give them to Inej at home

Aunties simp over him and Matthias and they try to set up their daughters with them. Kaz is disgusted and Matthias is terrified for his life.

Inej

One of her knives is used to cut the ribbon used for the groom's entry

‌Nina makes her perform a classical dance as everyone watches her in awe

‌Girls join her soon after and they all perform together

‌wore a dark green traditional saree to the wedding that left Kaz speechless

‌already knows what the received gifts are and cringes at a set of used dinner set

Receives blessings by everyone at the wedding. EVERYONE.

Is the only one at the wedding with the sense to feed the horse

‌reminisces of her father's words once the vidai takes place and wipes a lone tear from her eye

‌catches Kaz staring at her then and they have a silent conversation. A week later, they get secretly married.

‌is the photographer's muse; the camera gets stolen at the end of the night by God knows who :)

[thedelusionreaderbitch]

Backup - Jesper Fahey x alkemi! fem! Reader

A/n: So I don't know how much I actually like this one, but it could be worse so...

Warnings: Guns, death, wounds, swearing, I think that's it? You have been warned!

Summary: When the Crows are in trouble a certain Alkemi comes and saves the day...

I do not own the grishaverse or it's characters! Nor do I own these gifs!

"We should have brought backup."

Kaz grumbles as he smacks down two more Stadwatch with his cane.

The Crows are trying their best to hold the army of Stadwatch down, but Jesper is pretty sure they bit off more than they can chew. Although he hates that expression because it means that they're going to fail.

So that makes it wrong because they're most likely going to fail. But he guessed that the expression does relate to the situation decently well.

Using his prized pistols he shoots four men down, yet he knows it won't be enough. Even with them being all badass (mostly him) they all know this could be the end. Again.

Seven Stadwatch men advance on him as he's being slowly backed into a corner.

"Wylan!" He shouts. How the fuck will he get out of this one?

"I'm out of bombs Jes!" The merchling responds panic laced in his voice worried for his friend.

Shit.

He raises his guns not willing to go down without a fight, though he always thought he would die in an at least more interesting way.

Or even grow old with Y/n.

But who was he kidding himself? Saints, he really wished he could have stayed alive for her.

"But I'm not." A female voice rings out against the chaos and before he can even react he's being pulled up towards a building with a girl holding him up.

Zipping through the sky faster than the bullets of the Stadwatch could shoot at him, he almost screams out in surprise.

He feels like he's floating through the air and he sees a line on a building that the girl seems to be holding.... What was it exactly? It reminds him of one of Y/n's inventions, he thinks it's called - A grappling hook?

He squints his eyes to get a better look at the contraption. Now that he looks closer at it it's nearly the exact same design as his girlfriend's...

"Y/n!" He yells looking at the girl as they land on top of the building.

Rolling her eyes the inventor pulls her hood down revealing her full facile futures that Jesper always can't seem to take his mind off of.

"Took you long enough, you would think you would recognize your own girlfriend but apparently not."

He wants to kiss her, but he also wants to punch her for putting herself in danger for him. The sharpshooter goes to open his mouth but the Alkemi raise's her hand to stop him.

"Don't even try Jesper. Your friends need saving."

Jesper shakes his head and gives her a peak on the lips.

"Just be careful."

"Are you sure you're talking to the right person, mister I'm ready to die?" She questions him with a disapproving eyebrow raised.

"Hey! This face is never ready to leave this world!" He jokes but he see's her serious face and he softens.

"We'll talk about this when we're not in the middle- Or above a fight." Her voice does the opposite of his, and her tone hardens.

She takes his waist again, the grappling hook already fastened in her other hand.

"Hold on tight."

And then they're off again and he lets out a little shriek this time (not even nearly as loud as his last one) and they land in no time.

Right in the middle of the battle. He can't imagine something better, just fantastic. (Note the sarcasm.)

Quickly, he pulls out his guns and starts shooting as fast as it's humanly possible. He hits dead on every time.

In the distance he hears a faint tic, tic, and before he can cry out; Bomb! It explodes.

Boom!

Several stadwatch guards die, well more than several, it's more like the majority of the guards die.

"Is this what you meant by 'But I'm not!'"

Y/n laughs throwing her head back, Jesper could see her y/e/c orbs glow in the dark. Yet she's good at multitasking (unlike him apparently) because she throws a knife from her back pocket at someones knee. As he feels a prickling pain realizing he's been stabbed in the shoulder.

Hastily he covers it up before his girl can see, he didn't need her to be even more worried then she already was. She had enough stress for tonight.

"Yes!" She hollers giggling while she stabs a dagger into some man's stomach.

Poor guy, that's going to hurt. But it was hot.

There's a few guards that come up around her and Jesper frowns his eyebrows in concern.

"Y/n." He growls out lowly trying to warn the inventor without startling her.

He start's to make his way over to Y/n, locking and loading his gun on the way. He couldn't lose the Alkemi, not her.

"It's okay!"

She can take care of herself though.

She press's a button on her wrist and bullets fly out all around her, They must have been some special ammo because they followed the stadwatch in till they dropped dead. He might have helped make those.

"I've got this." She smirks at all the Crows who have now all became aware of her, wearing similar bewildered expressions on their faces.

"That's my girl!" Jesper yells as he kicks a guard to the ground.

Kaz grabs her arm to face him a consequential look adorning his face, one that made you listen to him if you valued your life.

"Who are you?"

One of the last stadwatch guards that didn't get the memo comes up behind Dirtyhands himself, knife in hand ready to pierce. Jesper had to give the guy credit though because this guy was either incredibly brave, or incredibly stupid.

Putting her hands out poison weaves from Y/n's hands inserting itself in the man. Then his corpse falls to the earth, just another dead man.

"Backup."

Eventually all the stadwatch are down and the Crows regroup together.

"So Jesper." Nina pipes up wiggling her eyebrows. "Who is this dashing lady?"

Everyone else seemed to lean in wondering who the hell she is. It took someone special to peak Fahey's interest enough where he stayed, they hadn't met anyone like her.

But instead of Jesper responding Y/n did; "The sharpshooter is my boyfriend Dumbass's."

Y/n turns her head to look at him and she narrows her beautiful y/c/e eyes at his shoulder. Oh, no he was it some shit now.

"Who is apparently injured! Son of a bitch!" She says as she hurry's over to his side in less than a second.

She rips off the piece of cloth that was covering his arm and he winces in pain but covers it up with a quick grin.

"Don't be an idiot Fahey and take your shirt off so we can help that bullet wound of yours."

"If you really wanted me with-"

The inventor glares at him taking out some ointment from one of her many pockets.

"What did I just say about being an idiot?"

The ointment's bottle is round, tiny and colored black. Jesper is pretty sure the bottle's meant to blend in with it's surroundings. It does a good job of it too, because Jesper can barely see it.

Y/n pops the lid off revealing that there's a slick brush attached to the top, inside of the lid. The girl gives him 'the look' and he promptly takes his shirt off although trying not to wince in pain in the process.

Carefully Y/n applies the ointment on the bullet wound, with the brush. This time he can't contain his pain, and he grimaces every now and then because, holy shit! That stuff hurts! Although the sharpshooter supposes putting anything on a bullet wound would be painful to anyone, doesn't matter what you're putting on it.

Slowly but surely Jesper watches in amazement as the damage steadily heals, closing up and leaving nothing but a scab left behind. The only thing on top.

"You're a healer?" Inej questions the L/n girl.

Y/n quickly puts her stuff away shaking her head.

"Nah, but some people call me the inventor which is probably the most accurate."

Kaz studies Jesper's girlfriend, and the girl doesn't shift or shy away from his heavy gaze. She faces it head on, unafraid.

"You're an Alkemi." She grins a bit at him for figuring it out but then again it is Kaz Brekker, it probably didn't take a lot of work.

"Correct but I still get the help of a certain favorite fabricator for my inventions." She winks at Jesper.

Turning to Wylan she gives him an excited smile and everyone tenses up knowing that he is Jesper's ex.

"By the saints Van Eck your work is amazing!"

The two instantly engage in a long conversation about things that everyone else can't even begin to comprehend. Everyone else was so far behind that not even Kaz bothered to try and listen on what they were saying. They might as well have been speaking another language. The Crows relax not expecting that outcome.

"How the hell did you keep your mouth shut about her?" Inej questions Jesper, and a faint blush spreads across his face remembering her methods.

"She's very convincing..."

Nina balks at him; "Ah, little Jesper is blushing! You really do like her!" She gushes.

There was a barely audible 'shut up' before once again you could hear another bomb go off. The Crows quickly turned around weapons at the ready, only to find Wylan an Y/n giggling and looking like they were out of their minds.

Y/n holds up a very large gun that looks like it was put together very fast, and rushed but still efficient enough.

"We made a bomb gun."

"Oh saints, we shouldn't have introduced them." Jesper wails.

Y/n laughs and goes to stand beside Jesper.

"I have to go, but lovely meeting you all, wonderful criminals you lot. Wylan," She spins around to face the flutist.

"Remember where I said my lab was. And Jesper." She points at her boyfriend.

"Don't get into any trouble while I'm gone!"

Giving her a dashing smile Jesper just laughs at the girl.

"Never!"

Before Y/n could respond with some witted comment Kaz interrupts her; "The Crow Club six am don't be late."

Taking out her grappling hook Y/n press's the button and right when she's about to zip through the air they all hear the inventor yell;

"I wouldn't dream of it!"

Words 1757

-thedelusionreaderbitch

Shadow and bone taglist: @kaqua @rika90 @thefandomplace @musical-theatre-obsessed-dumbass @gallysonegoodlung @navs-bhat @sumsebien @dontjudgeabookbythecover @brekker-zenik @alohastitch0626 @ilovemarvelanne1 @emmsamultifan06

[ravenyenn19]

MODERN SIX OF CROWS HEAD CANNON THAT NO ONE ASKED FOR BUT I THINK ABOUT ALL THE TIME:

The Crows ABSOLUTELY have board game nights.

All of them have different favorites, of course.

Jesper is all about the party games, the ones that make them all laugh and choke on their drinks with startled giggles.

Wylan loves the old school classics. Believe it or not, he’s beaten Kaz at monopoly. (This time, Kaz didn’t cheat. Inej made sure of it as she sat literally in his lap the entire time. Kaz wouldn’t have, anyways. He’d wanted to prove a point- that Wylan could and SHOULD believe he is the best at it, even if Nina or Jesper have to whisper the card’s text to him occasionally when he doesn’t immediately recognize the pictures.)

Nina loves the aesthetic games- anything beautiful and strategic. Azul, or even blockas! (She’s also dangerously good at Tetris style games, for whatever reason. They all know she’s the Queen when the shapes come out.)

Matthias is a wild card, but he loves the cooperative games most of all. He hasn’t really admitted it in so many words, but he prefers to work as a team rather than being competitive. He thinks they’re all strong in different ways, and they always win.

Inej 100% adores anything involving mysteries. Escape room board games are where she shines, and with Kaz always right on par, they get competitive as the others drink and laugh and just hope they all win.

Kaz is the strategist, through and through. Anything complicated and “big”. He adores risk, down to basic chess. He also loves games where he can outsmart his compatriots in other ways- such as playing Jack the Ripper in “White Chapel” whilst the crows play detectives, hunting him down on a massive board that looks like Victorian era London.

They also have poker night. Kaz is the resident dealer, but they’ve all noticed that Inej can shuffle nearly as well due to the late nights she’s spent sitting cross legged on Kaz’s bed, learning from him as they share quiet laughter and the occasional smiling kiss.

At all of these game nights, they somehow all end up with seats pulled close to the table and closer to one person than any other.

Kaz’s hand is often found on Inej’s leg, absently rubbing as he strategizes. Matthias always has a hand clasped in Nina’s, even when it’s most likely inconvenient (he hates it when she pouts, she always gets him to cave). Jesper’s long arm is most certainly draped over the back of Wylan’s chair, easy positioning to lean in and peck his lover’s flushing red cheek whenever he deems it time.

Nina, Jesper & Inej always end up a little tipsy on wine. (Kaz, Matthias & Wylan never complain. It only means they receive more giggles and affection.) For Inej, this is little moments when she picks up Kaz’s hand and lays her lips to his knuckles. For Nina, this is full on kisses in the middle of a game on Matthias’ lips. For Jesper, this is tugging Wylan closer into the crook of his arm, nearly to his lap, and kisses to the top of Wylan’s curly red hair.

They love game night. They have them at least twice a month if not more.

(I’m a manager for a board game/coffee company, so like… I thought about it. 😅)